1 00:00:03,320 --> 00:00:07,960 Speaker 1: Welcome back to another episode aboulcom this COVI. I'm your host, 2 00:00:08,560 --> 00:00:14,160 Speaker 1: Kevin Pollock. Yes that Kevin? What's that? WHOA? Do you 3 00:00:14,240 --> 00:00:16,880 Speaker 1: know who I think I am? But I digress. Let's 4 00:00:16,920 --> 00:00:18,960 Speaker 1: meet our ALcom a shower in no particular orders. Say 5 00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:22,400 Speaker 1: hello to Chris Alvarado. Chris and my ship are ready 6 00:00:22,400 --> 00:00:26,880 Speaker 1: for sake. Fill in the blank. If it were socially acceptable, 7 00:00:27,480 --> 00:00:32,200 Speaker 1: I would blank the chicken blank, fuck the chicken blind. 8 00:00:35,080 --> 00:00:39,320 Speaker 1: We were looking for eat the chicken skin, but we'll 9 00:00:39,320 --> 00:00:46,560 Speaker 1: take it. Answer to the bank. Hey, Kaol Stratton is here, 10 00:00:47,720 --> 00:00:52,440 Speaker 1: Mr Ten's hat maker. What is your favorite lunch item? Oh? 11 00:00:52,479 --> 00:00:55,920 Speaker 1: I mean I will eat pasta. I have not all 12 00:00:55,920 --> 00:00:58,680 Speaker 1: the time for every meal. If I could, uh, lasagna 13 00:00:58,680 --> 00:01:01,280 Speaker 1: as a special come for food for me, but yeah, 14 00:01:01,320 --> 00:01:05,399 Speaker 1: any of that stuff. Lasagna is what we've locked in 15 00:01:05,440 --> 00:01:09,280 Speaker 1: as an answer. There's James Heeney, Jim, Jim your favorite number? 16 00:01:09,840 --> 00:01:14,360 Speaker 1: And why uh the number two? Because my birthday is 17 00:01:14,400 --> 00:01:19,200 Speaker 1: on the second of December. I feel, yeah, it's a 18 00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:21,920 Speaker 1: big deal. The number two is by far my biggest 19 00:01:21,959 --> 00:01:24,760 Speaker 1: favorite is number And I did I say when we 20 00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:26,319 Speaker 1: did it before that I wish he was gonna say 21 00:01:26,400 --> 00:01:29,920 Speaker 1: number two because he likes to poop. I don't think so. Okay, 22 00:01:30,160 --> 00:01:34,240 Speaker 1: I hope you did last, but you eat pooh. If 23 00:01:34,280 --> 00:01:37,480 Speaker 1: you think him Lee's it's Joey Greer Chubbs. Do you 24 00:01:37,520 --> 00:01:41,520 Speaker 1: remember eating chocolate cake seated across from me? Oh my god, 25 00:01:41,520 --> 00:01:45,679 Speaker 1: I'm so high? Yeah? And how stone were you on 26 00:01:45,720 --> 00:01:49,760 Speaker 1: a scale of one to fifty? I oh, man, I was. 27 00:01:49,960 --> 00:01:53,280 Speaker 1: I was gone. I was so caught in mouth to 28 00:01:53,320 --> 00:01:55,840 Speaker 1: begin with, and then I got this moist chocolate cake. 29 00:01:55,880 --> 00:01:59,840 Speaker 1: That was just that was the best. That was the best. Yeah. 30 00:02:00,480 --> 00:02:04,080 Speaker 1: My memory is um, I'd never seen a cow up 31 00:02:04,120 --> 00:02:07,560 Speaker 1: close chewing its cud. I guess you would call it. 32 00:02:08,200 --> 00:02:10,720 Speaker 1: And that's what it looked like in human form, sitting 33 00:02:10,720 --> 00:02:16,519 Speaker 1: across from me. Just all right, let's do a damn show. 34 00:02:16,639 --> 00:02:19,720 Speaker 1: Most of our scene suggestions are gathered from your listener emails. 35 00:02:19,720 --> 00:02:22,040 Speaker 1: The rest come from our fine patron v I P. S. 36 00:02:22,080 --> 00:02:25,040 Speaker 1: If you'd like to submit a listener email, please do 37 00:02:25,680 --> 00:02:27,519 Speaker 1: right to the podcast at your name here at alcomy 38 00:02:27,600 --> 00:02:30,600 Speaker 1: this dot com. I read them, I reply, we use them. 39 00:02:30,880 --> 00:02:33,320 Speaker 1: Seen one comes to us from patron v I. P. Richard, 40 00:02:33,360 --> 00:02:36,640 Speaker 1: who wrote, Hey, alchemist, I'm really digging the patroon v 41 00:02:36,760 --> 00:02:40,119 Speaker 1: I p content and I might try giving the hotline 42 00:02:40,440 --> 00:02:43,920 Speaker 1: a try next during the next live Hank. I just 43 00:02:44,040 --> 00:02:47,440 Speaker 1: watched the June live hang recording and got to say, 44 00:02:47,840 --> 00:02:51,200 Speaker 1: I wouldn't mind at all if Kevin replied to our 45 00:02:51,280 --> 00:02:56,480 Speaker 1: emails saying a scene suggestion wouldn't would not make the cut. 46 00:02:56,960 --> 00:02:59,079 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I was grappling with how do I let 47 00:02:59,120 --> 00:03:02,120 Speaker 1: folks down? Gentle late and he's saying, just tell him 48 00:03:02,200 --> 00:03:04,360 Speaker 1: be straight up, and I'm gonna try that. I'm gonna 49 00:03:04,360 --> 00:03:08,000 Speaker 1: try to be straight up. Hey, thank you for submitting. Um, 50 00:03:08,040 --> 00:03:11,520 Speaker 1: that's uh, try again, please, well, you know, give a 51 00:03:11,520 --> 00:03:16,240 Speaker 1: little direction. Maybe maybe I'll try that. Thank you for that, 52 00:03:16,320 --> 00:03:20,200 Speaker 1: Richard Um. And now the scene suggestion. Two different spy 53 00:03:20,280 --> 00:03:25,359 Speaker 1: agency teams stumble upon each other while spying on a 54 00:03:25,440 --> 00:03:29,720 Speaker 1: drug cartel. We got blue inside, We got blue inside, 55 00:03:29,880 --> 00:03:35,760 Speaker 1: and we can take a break. Voice alright, how long 56 00:03:35,800 --> 00:03:40,280 Speaker 1: do we let blue uh before we maybe question if 57 00:03:40,280 --> 00:03:42,600 Speaker 1: he's gone rogue? I don't know if you've seen signs, 58 00:03:42,640 --> 00:03:46,920 Speaker 1: but he's a little agitated. But aren't we all? Oh yeah, no, 59 00:03:47,000 --> 00:03:50,640 Speaker 1: I'm I'm getting more agitated by the moment. You know, 60 00:03:51,360 --> 00:03:53,880 Speaker 1: I gotta say that you've keeping this van up very well, 61 00:03:53,960 --> 00:03:56,640 Speaker 1: and we appreciate it. It looks nice inside here, thank you. 62 00:03:56,840 --> 00:03:59,280 Speaker 1: Oh thanks. Yeah, I'm thinking about having the shag carpet 63 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:01,760 Speaker 1: replaced though anything I don't know. I mean it's it's 64 00:04:01,760 --> 00:04:06,640 Speaker 1: scream to me and screams you, right, I mean, I'm 65 00:04:06,640 --> 00:04:11,320 Speaker 1: a seventies guy right through and through, through and through man, 66 00:04:12,400 --> 00:04:15,600 Speaker 1: And I'm sorry to interrupt. I'm sorry about that. I'm 67 00:04:15,640 --> 00:04:19,240 Speaker 1: trying to find, uh like that there's a store that 68 00:04:19,279 --> 00:04:22,919 Speaker 1: I think just sells hammers. I think that, uh forget that. 69 00:04:23,160 --> 00:04:25,640 Speaker 1: I need to get a hammer. I was told to 70 00:04:25,680 --> 00:04:28,599 Speaker 1: come down Main Street and I would see a church 71 00:04:28,760 --> 00:04:32,800 Speaker 1: with two clocks. I might have missed it. I'm looking 72 00:04:32,920 --> 00:04:36,520 Speaker 1: for a hammer store, a store that that I mean, 73 00:04:36,560 --> 00:04:40,760 Speaker 1: I will probably sell other things, but I need hammers, 74 00:04:40,920 --> 00:04:45,720 Speaker 1: is alright, So what you're looking for our hammers? Looking 75 00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:48,320 Speaker 1: for a hardware store? Yeah, looking for a hardware store. 76 00:04:48,360 --> 00:04:51,920 Speaker 1: I would recommend the True Hardware on Venice Boulevard. And 77 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:56,320 Speaker 1: that's great, about ten meters from here. You know how 78 00:04:56,320 --> 00:05:03,800 Speaker 1: far that ten? Uh? In a couple of miles. All right, 79 00:05:04,040 --> 00:05:06,240 Speaker 1: that's a beautiful van. You got it inside there, said 80 00:05:06,720 --> 00:05:09,920 Speaker 1: whoa watching shandelier, a lot of computers and a lot 81 00:05:09,920 --> 00:05:14,520 Speaker 1: of tech guys. I am big tech guy myself. You 82 00:05:14,640 --> 00:05:16,680 Speaker 1: think the irony, of course, is me just looking for 83 00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:20,120 Speaker 1: that hammer and being a tech early invention by man. 84 00:05:20,240 --> 00:05:23,200 Speaker 1: Computers are later invention, but a hammer. Okay, well, you 85 00:05:23,279 --> 00:05:25,320 Speaker 1: have a You have a great day, sir, you have 86 00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:28,960 Speaker 1: a really great day. Take care. Oh man, how long 87 00:05:28,960 --> 00:05:31,520 Speaker 1: are we just gonna sit out here for this bullshit? 88 00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:33,880 Speaker 1: We should move in? So what did they have in 89 00:05:33,920 --> 00:05:41,000 Speaker 1: their van? What was in there? What was in there? Huh? 90 00:05:41,360 --> 00:05:43,360 Speaker 1: What was in their van? Did you not get any 91 00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:47,440 Speaker 1: information out of him? No? No, I'm sorry. I've been 92 00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:49,560 Speaker 1: looking at this hammer. I was like, you know, this 93 00:05:49,680 --> 00:05:52,680 Speaker 1: is one of the early inventions of man. Did you 94 00:05:52,800 --> 00:05:57,360 Speaker 1: know that? Wait a second? Are you are you? Are 95 00:05:57,400 --> 00:06:00,680 Speaker 1: you not part of our team? I thought you dis guys, 96 00:06:00,720 --> 00:06:02,200 Speaker 1: you know what? Never mind, never mind, never mind. I 97 00:06:02,240 --> 00:06:04,760 Speaker 1: gotta go. I gotta go Hommer home or Homer. I am, 98 00:06:04,800 --> 00:06:06,839 Speaker 1: I am. I am part of your team. Jesus Christ. Yes, 99 00:06:07,240 --> 00:06:09,000 Speaker 1: So why didn't you tell me what's going on in 100 00:06:09,040 --> 00:06:13,040 Speaker 1: their van? Number one? I told you, I'm looking at 101 00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:16,839 Speaker 1: this hammer. I'm geeking out. You know where we came from, 102 00:06:16,880 --> 00:06:19,400 Speaker 1: this is where we started. And then if you look 103 00:06:19,400 --> 00:06:21,440 Speaker 1: all or look at all these buildings. That's where we 104 00:06:21,480 --> 00:06:28,279 Speaker 1: are now. While over I'm getting a sneaky suspicion there's 105 00:06:28,320 --> 00:06:33,640 Speaker 1: another spy unit that are keeping eyes and tips on 106 00:06:33,680 --> 00:06:38,440 Speaker 1: this cartel. Who do I report that to? You? You know, 107 00:06:38,480 --> 00:06:41,760 Speaker 1: I'm a little confused at the latter this kind of stuff. Now, 108 00:06:41,800 --> 00:06:44,960 Speaker 1: we've been in this cast so fucking long. I don't 109 00:06:44,960 --> 00:06:47,280 Speaker 1: even know who to report to. Like I were too deep? 110 00:06:47,480 --> 00:06:51,200 Speaker 1: I think I think we are in too deep? Well 111 00:06:51,560 --> 00:06:53,880 Speaker 1: we're seven feet in, So where do you mark the 112 00:06:53,960 --> 00:06:59,040 Speaker 1: too deep spot? I think anything at the five? Yeah, 113 00:06:59,640 --> 00:07:03,080 Speaker 1: So I don't know. I feel like if we bring 114 00:07:03,120 --> 00:07:05,279 Speaker 1: this up to the captain, he's not gonna like it. 115 00:07:05,400 --> 00:07:08,080 Speaker 1: One of us is going to get fired. Why don't 116 00:07:08,120 --> 00:07:12,840 Speaker 1: we report back that we think the cartel has disbanded? 117 00:07:13,160 --> 00:07:16,480 Speaker 1: Is that too unbelievable? Is that possible? You know? New 118 00:07:16,520 --> 00:07:20,040 Speaker 1: cartel's moving every day. We could say that this one 119 00:07:20,400 --> 00:07:23,040 Speaker 1: they put up a sign that's had gone fishing and 120 00:07:23,040 --> 00:07:25,840 Speaker 1: they're not gonna be here anymore. You know what I'm saying, Hey, 121 00:07:25,960 --> 00:07:29,280 Speaker 1: hey guys, hey, hey, you're still here the same spot. 122 00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:32,040 Speaker 1: Look at that. Anyway, We'll let you know found the hammer. 123 00:07:32,640 --> 00:07:35,480 Speaker 1: Really good stuff. It wasn't true value. It was it 124 00:07:35,520 --> 00:07:39,280 Speaker 1: wasn't just a hammers only. Uh, Main Street is very 125 00:07:39,360 --> 00:07:41,480 Speaker 1: far from where I thought where we are now, it 126 00:07:41,600 --> 00:07:44,480 Speaker 1: is far, but anyway one to come back? Sir? Do 127 00:07:44,520 --> 00:07:46,520 Speaker 1: you understand that we sent you on a quest for 128 00:07:46,560 --> 00:07:48,480 Speaker 1: a hammer just to get you the funk out of here? 129 00:07:51,040 --> 00:07:53,240 Speaker 1: But we could use a saw, we right, we could 130 00:07:53,280 --> 00:07:55,119 Speaker 1: use a saw. Right, I think we need a saw. 131 00:07:56,440 --> 00:08:00,160 Speaker 1: I mean I came here looking for directions for the right, 132 00:08:01,640 --> 00:08:03,960 Speaker 1: you know, but I'm happy to go grab us. Ah, yeah, 133 00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:08,080 Speaker 1: you need it? Hey, am I crazy? Isn't that the 134 00:08:08,080 --> 00:08:09,880 Speaker 1: guy who was looking for a hammer? He's talking to 135 00:08:09,920 --> 00:08:12,680 Speaker 1: a van that looks very similar to ours. Would you 136 00:08:12,760 --> 00:08:15,720 Speaker 1: just just do the paperwork? Okay, just do the paperwork. 137 00:08:16,960 --> 00:08:19,360 Speaker 1: I'm not okay, I'm also a field agent. I'm not 138 00:08:19,360 --> 00:08:22,880 Speaker 1: just the paperwork week. We're all fucking field agents. Okay, listen, 139 00:08:22,960 --> 00:08:26,960 Speaker 1: he's okay, he's with us. He's having a hard time 140 00:08:27,080 --> 00:08:30,120 Speaker 1: telling us about what he's seeing in But he's what 141 00:08:30,160 --> 00:08:32,160 Speaker 1: I'm saying, is what I'm saying. Is what I'm saying 142 00:08:32,240 --> 00:08:34,840 Speaker 1: is we are in this fan with the shag carpet. 143 00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:37,680 Speaker 1: We can all see that, right, Yes, of course, Computers 144 00:08:37,720 --> 00:08:40,319 Speaker 1: all around. It's a little dirty. Okay, So why did 145 00:08:40,360 --> 00:08:43,840 Speaker 1: the guy who's with us, supposedly, why did he go 146 00:08:43,920 --> 00:08:47,600 Speaker 1: to that similarly marked van across the street? Listen, I 147 00:08:48,960 --> 00:08:53,240 Speaker 1: a bus is Look at the window. Here, there's seven vans, 148 00:08:53,280 --> 00:08:59,880 Speaker 1: all identical outside, seven seven vans, and one lunatic going 149 00:09:00,080 --> 00:09:04,040 Speaker 1: door to door talking to him. I thought that would 150 00:09:04,080 --> 00:09:08,320 Speaker 1: be all right, Danny, we're all looking at same game. 151 00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:13,680 Speaker 1: Seven vans is confusing the most people, you too, Shut 152 00:09:13,720 --> 00:09:15,840 Speaker 1: the hell up. Let's just tell me right now. Okay, 153 00:09:16,240 --> 00:09:19,040 Speaker 1: those gentlemen out there are building a small business. Okay. 154 00:09:19,080 --> 00:09:22,479 Speaker 1: Each one of those vans is a shad copet fan. Okay. 155 00:09:22,760 --> 00:09:25,120 Speaker 1: They go into homes, they put shape down. Do you 156 00:09:25,160 --> 00:09:31,840 Speaker 1: think that those people weren't like us one day? Huh? Captain? Captain, 157 00:09:31,960 --> 00:09:35,720 Speaker 1: let me ask you a question. How often do you 158 00:09:35,800 --> 00:09:39,160 Speaker 1: trim your toenails? Not often? I let him grow as 159 00:09:39,200 --> 00:09:42,319 Speaker 1: long as I can look into the ground. Right. Also 160 00:09:42,440 --> 00:09:46,320 Speaker 1: better a playing guitar? Blue, Come in blue? Agent Blue, 161 00:09:46,400 --> 00:09:51,800 Speaker 1: Come in blue? Is that it we're not going to 162 00:09:51,880 --> 00:09:55,440 Speaker 1: hear from him. I think he might. It's possible that 163 00:09:55,559 --> 00:09:58,320 Speaker 1: he's undercover right now, and the more we try to 164 00:09:58,400 --> 00:10:00,800 Speaker 1: contact him, the more we reveal fling that he's an 165 00:10:00,880 --> 00:10:04,640 Speaker 1: undercovering splitting channels right now. Wait, hold on, whose house 166 00:10:04,720 --> 00:10:08,400 Speaker 1: is on this channel? Wait, I'm on the channel. It's 167 00:10:08,440 --> 00:10:13,120 Speaker 1: not possible he's undercover. He's definitely undercover, and it's possible 168 00:10:13,120 --> 00:10:15,400 Speaker 1: he's in a moment. But I'm saying we're talking to 169 00:10:15,440 --> 00:10:18,000 Speaker 1: him through his earpiece, so that wouldn't give him away. 170 00:10:19,120 --> 00:10:21,440 Speaker 1: But if he answered us, he might not be answering 171 00:10:21,520 --> 00:10:23,920 Speaker 1: us because he's in the middle. I am picking somebody 172 00:10:23,960 --> 00:10:26,480 Speaker 1: else up on our channel. I am picking up the 173 00:10:26,520 --> 00:10:29,840 Speaker 1: party line, a party line. We should have a party line. 174 00:10:29,920 --> 00:10:33,280 Speaker 1: Who the funs on our channel? Fun? Fun, fun Fun. 175 00:10:34,360 --> 00:10:36,160 Speaker 1: I'm gonna step out of the van. Okay, I'm gonna 176 00:10:36,160 --> 00:10:38,000 Speaker 1: step out of the van. Why would you step out 177 00:10:38,000 --> 00:10:40,720 Speaker 1: of the I'm just gonna go figure things out myself. 178 00:10:42,000 --> 00:10:44,240 Speaker 1: I got a saw here. I went down to the 179 00:10:44,320 --> 00:10:47,120 Speaker 1: hardware store, picked up saw that. Those guys over there 180 00:10:47,160 --> 00:10:51,960 Speaker 1: one who saw something? And do you know that this 181 00:10:52,120 --> 00:10:55,320 Speaker 1: was right after the hammer humans. I think you've gone 182 00:10:55,320 --> 00:10:57,640 Speaker 1: to tea. I think you've gone full seven feet. You 183 00:10:57,679 --> 00:11:00,600 Speaker 1: shut the funk up, You shut up right now. Okay, 184 00:11:00,600 --> 00:11:03,360 Speaker 1: I think you've gone too deep. Okay, you just started 185 00:11:03,360 --> 00:11:05,240 Speaker 1: with the hammer. Now you're on a saw. You forgot 186 00:11:05,240 --> 00:11:07,559 Speaker 1: where you came from. You came from our van. Okay, 187 00:11:07,720 --> 00:11:10,880 Speaker 1: you're part of us. You're blue. Oh my god, I 188 00:11:11,080 --> 00:11:14,080 Speaker 1: was berthed out of the van. I I am a van. 189 00:11:14,920 --> 00:11:18,959 Speaker 1: I'm a van. No, you're a secret agent. Come back 190 00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:21,199 Speaker 1: in here. You need to be read it. Hold on, 191 00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:24,840 Speaker 1: hold on, blues coming through. The guy he's talking to 192 00:11:25,040 --> 00:11:28,120 Speaker 1: isn't blue. He's just a random crazy nut. Oh god, 193 00:11:28,160 --> 00:11:34,760 Speaker 1: this is gonna throw everything sideways. Who's on our channel? 194 00:11:35,120 --> 00:11:38,719 Speaker 1: Who the hell is alright? Just getting to the van? 195 00:11:38,800 --> 00:11:41,920 Speaker 1: Getting to the van? I got him. He's crazy about 196 00:11:41,960 --> 00:11:45,360 Speaker 1: hammers and sauce. A bus. All the guys are now 197 00:11:45,440 --> 00:11:48,120 Speaker 1: doing kind of like fire drill scenario and the vans 198 00:11:48,120 --> 00:11:51,400 Speaker 1: they're all now and they're going into other vans, and 199 00:11:51,440 --> 00:11:55,360 Speaker 1: then they keep talking about imps. Chat. I hear it's 200 00:11:55,400 --> 00:11:59,800 Speaker 1: really loud. They're just on the other side of the window. So, wow, 201 00:12:00,880 --> 00:12:07,560 Speaker 1: can we jumping somebody else's vandon? Okay, we gotta go 202 00:12:07,600 --> 00:12:10,239 Speaker 1: down there. We shot. We gotta support these small businesses. 203 00:12:10,240 --> 00:12:12,959 Speaker 1: All right. Now, we invite every shad copt company van 204 00:12:13,040 --> 00:12:16,320 Speaker 1: operated business inside here and tell them they just get 205 00:12:16,320 --> 00:12:23,400 Speaker 1: a square of this. Hey, listen. Uh. I know I've 206 00:12:23,440 --> 00:12:25,960 Speaker 1: only been running the Drug guardtel for a couple of weeks, 207 00:12:25,960 --> 00:12:28,480 Speaker 1: but I don't know who else to talk to about this. 208 00:12:28,559 --> 00:12:33,040 Speaker 1: I feel like, uh like we're being watched, like by 209 00:12:33,040 --> 00:12:35,840 Speaker 1: by a lot of people. You're doing a great job, 210 00:12:36,080 --> 00:12:39,600 Speaker 1: You're doing a great Thanks. I appreciate the emotional support. 211 00:12:39,679 --> 00:12:41,480 Speaker 1: But back to we have a lot of we have 212 00:12:41,559 --> 00:12:45,880 Speaker 1: a lot of confidence in you. Again, thank you. Robertson. 213 00:12:46,480 --> 00:12:49,920 Speaker 1: Do you since we're being watched by anyone? Is this 214 00:12:50,080 --> 00:12:53,360 Speaker 1: just in my head? Well, guys, I don't want to 215 00:12:53,400 --> 00:12:56,600 Speaker 1: startle anybody. Yeah, this morning I woke up. Let me 216 00:12:56,640 --> 00:12:58,320 Speaker 1: on button my shirt and show you what I woke 217 00:12:58,400 --> 00:13:08,480 Speaker 1: up on my chest? Look at the Jesus don't know alright, alright, 218 00:13:08,559 --> 00:13:12,679 Speaker 1: my paranoia has subsided. Thank you for that. Rabbi. Hey, 219 00:13:12,720 --> 00:13:14,520 Speaker 1: what do you mean you're out of vans? I came 220 00:13:14,559 --> 00:13:18,040 Speaker 1: down here, I saved up. I want to buy a van. Look, 221 00:13:18,240 --> 00:13:20,640 Speaker 1: I can't be more clear about this. I am out 222 00:13:20,679 --> 00:13:27,080 Speaker 1: of vans. Okay, they bled me dry about two days ago. Okay, guy, 223 00:13:27,160 --> 00:13:29,320 Speaker 1: this is your van, Lot Van the van. Guys, Van Lot, 224 00:13:29,440 --> 00:13:34,079 Speaker 1: come down to van the van, Come down to guys van. 225 00:13:35,120 --> 00:13:37,120 Speaker 1: So I came down. I saved up all summer because 226 00:13:37,120 --> 00:13:40,320 Speaker 1: I wanted my first van. And you know, listen, Ruby, 227 00:13:40,360 --> 00:13:42,839 Speaker 1: I know that. Okay, you worked at the mind, I 228 00:13:42,880 --> 00:13:44,679 Speaker 1: know the work you put in. The whole town was 229 00:13:44,760 --> 00:13:48,160 Speaker 1: cheering for you. But I don't have any more vans. Ruby, 230 00:13:48,200 --> 00:13:51,439 Speaker 1: I'm sorry. I need this van. I got black along 231 00:13:51,480 --> 00:13:53,800 Speaker 1: over the summer being down in the mines, and I 232 00:13:53,920 --> 00:13:56,560 Speaker 1: just don't want to van spend my final days in 233 00:13:56,600 --> 00:14:02,120 Speaker 1: a van if I can't. Look, han, man, we have 234 00:14:02,320 --> 00:14:06,200 Speaker 1: this minivan. We have this minivan here. Maybe maybe the 235 00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:10,280 Speaker 1: minivan would suffice Hey, hold on a second, have I 236 00:14:10,360 --> 00:14:14,640 Speaker 1: was just oh, well, it's honestly, since we haven't signed 237 00:14:14,679 --> 00:14:20,360 Speaker 1: the pit out here, and let's make that say it 238 00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:29,240 Speaker 1: okay for sir, Henry, just sell that man the minivan. Okay, Well, 239 00:14:29,280 --> 00:14:30,640 Speaker 1: I just think we should sell it to the person 240 00:14:30,680 --> 00:14:33,200 Speaker 1: who's willing to pay the most for it. Yes, it's 241 00:14:33,240 --> 00:14:35,800 Speaker 1: obviously this man right here, he's gonna pay top talks 242 00:14:35,880 --> 00:14:37,320 Speaker 1: for Do you think Ruby's gonna be able to pay 243 00:14:37,360 --> 00:14:40,520 Speaker 1: for that for his mining Jim? No, okay, No, you're right, 244 00:14:40,520 --> 00:14:43,640 Speaker 1: you're right, You're right. God damnit, Henry. Sorry, I'm gonna 245 00:14:43,640 --> 00:14:46,200 Speaker 1: have to stick with the original sale, and uh, we're 246 00:14:46,200 --> 00:14:50,360 Speaker 1: gonna sell the minivan to the Miniman. That scene one. 247 00:14:53,040 --> 00:14:56,000 Speaker 1: We gotta have that T shirt selling the minivan to 248 00:14:56,080 --> 00:15:01,760 Speaker 1: the Miniman that reminds me of something. A shirt right 249 00:15:01,840 --> 00:15:05,440 Speaker 1: now that says, may I call you? And it has 250 00:15:05,600 --> 00:15:09,040 Speaker 1: all of the names from the first year of you 251 00:15:09,200 --> 00:15:12,320 Speaker 1: giving me different names. It's up on It's up on 252 00:15:12,400 --> 00:15:16,320 Speaker 1: te Spring. Now up on te spring. The alchemyst T 253 00:15:16,440 --> 00:15:21,920 Speaker 1: shirts available and they finally show up t Spring. Cut 254 00:15:21,960 --> 00:15:25,240 Speaker 1: us a break. Yeah, there are a handful of shirts. 255 00:15:25,240 --> 00:15:28,080 Speaker 1: We need to have another contest for the listeners. We 256 00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:30,040 Speaker 1: will I and I'm coming back to it. I'm sorry 257 00:15:30,080 --> 00:15:32,560 Speaker 1: for interrupting, but the T shirt thing just reminded me 258 00:15:32,600 --> 00:15:35,200 Speaker 1: that I'm wearing the brand new T shirt and you're 259 00:15:35,240 --> 00:15:38,200 Speaker 1: saying that one has all the bizarre names I gave 260 00:15:38,200 --> 00:15:42,760 Speaker 1: you during the first year in the opening. Great, all right, 261 00:15:42,760 --> 00:15:48,600 Speaker 1: I'm gonna buy one. You see. Two comes to us 262 00:15:48,640 --> 00:15:51,920 Speaker 1: from Abriel, who wrote, Hello, Miss I am a new 263 00:15:51,960 --> 00:15:55,520 Speaker 1: mom to a two month old baby girl named Theodora, 264 00:15:55,840 --> 00:15:59,760 Speaker 1: affectionately known as Teddy. Your show had literally gotten me 265 00:15:59,840 --> 00:16:04,880 Speaker 1: through more than a few rough moments and sleepless nights 266 00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:06,960 Speaker 1: since I pretty much have nothing else on my mind 267 00:16:07,040 --> 00:16:10,480 Speaker 1: these days, except for baby care. My scene suggestion is 268 00:16:10,520 --> 00:16:16,040 Speaker 1: as follows. First time parents are taking a newborn care class. 269 00:16:17,520 --> 00:16:26,920 Speaker 1: Thanks Abriella A from New Park p A. Abrielle. I 270 00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:28,480 Speaker 1: just don't want to mess it up. I don't want 271 00:16:28,480 --> 00:16:30,080 Speaker 1: to mess it up. I'm gonna be a terrible day. 272 00:16:30,120 --> 00:16:33,560 Speaker 1: I'm just gonna mess it up. Rick, you were born 273 00:16:33,600 --> 00:16:36,840 Speaker 1: to be a dad. It's human nature. But I take 274 00:16:36,960 --> 00:16:40,040 Speaker 1: this class and it's gonna go great. But Randa, you 275 00:16:40,080 --> 00:16:42,720 Speaker 1: know I'm accident prone. I have been my whole life. 276 00:16:42,960 --> 00:16:46,800 Speaker 1: My family's incredibly unlucky. It just just knows. You think 277 00:16:46,840 --> 00:16:51,680 Speaker 1: you're the first person that's been afraid of having a baby. No, 278 00:16:51,720 --> 00:16:55,040 Speaker 1: but I just I just, Randa, I just sorry, I'm 279 00:16:55,040 --> 00:16:57,200 Speaker 1: freaking out. I just I just don't want to be 280 00:16:57,240 --> 00:17:00,400 Speaker 1: a terrible dad, and I feel like I'm gonna be. Rick. 281 00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:02,080 Speaker 1: You're not gonna be a terrible dad. You got us 282 00:17:02,080 --> 00:17:05,440 Speaker 1: a great deal on this group on class. It's gonna 283 00:17:05,480 --> 00:17:11,600 Speaker 1: be wonderful. We're gonna learn a lot. Just calm down, Okay, Hello, everybody, 284 00:17:15,240 --> 00:17:17,440 Speaker 1: h thank you. I'm gonna go ahead and start reading. 285 00:17:17,480 --> 00:17:19,919 Speaker 1: I appreciate you all coming to the very last Barnes 286 00:17:19,960 --> 00:17:23,439 Speaker 1: and Noble. I think in the in the world for 287 00:17:23,520 --> 00:17:28,520 Speaker 1: the reading of my book today. Um, it's dedicated to 288 00:17:28,600 --> 00:17:32,840 Speaker 1: my parents, Rick and Nora, who, as it turns out, 289 00:17:32,880 --> 00:17:37,280 Speaker 1: didn't want me. Uh, my dad was I just read 290 00:17:37,320 --> 00:17:40,520 Speaker 1: the book, as he reminded me, I'm gonna get to it, sir. 291 00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:43,600 Speaker 1: As he reminded to me at every one of my birthdays. 292 00:17:43,920 --> 00:17:49,280 Speaker 1: UM was nervous. Uh was was insecure about his ability 293 00:17:49,320 --> 00:17:56,840 Speaker 1: to be a right here, that's appreciated, sir by someone 294 00:17:56,840 --> 00:17:59,200 Speaker 1: other than me. But as it turns out, my father 295 00:17:59,320 --> 00:18:01,399 Speaker 1: was the best dad dad anyone could have hoped for it. 296 00:18:01,440 --> 00:18:03,920 Speaker 1: I want to dedicate this book to my parents. The 297 00:18:03,960 --> 00:18:07,359 Speaker 1: book is entitled I'm gonna start reading from your book. 298 00:18:07,400 --> 00:18:11,439 Speaker 1: I hadn't go ahead and do that now, sir. It 299 00:18:11,520 --> 00:18:14,960 Speaker 1: was a soft I remember it because of the time. Yeah, 300 00:18:15,160 --> 00:18:18,120 Speaker 1: my book doesn't start that way. Face. Well, then maybe 301 00:18:18,160 --> 00:18:20,840 Speaker 1: it's a I've got the wrong book. Yep, you do. 302 00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:24,200 Speaker 1: You got the wrong Barnes and Noble. Excuse me, sir, 303 00:18:24,280 --> 00:18:26,840 Speaker 1: you have to leave. This is a book reading. You 304 00:18:26,880 --> 00:18:30,120 Speaker 1: are a problem. No, don't try to dodge me. Don't. 305 00:18:30,840 --> 00:18:32,960 Speaker 1: I'm standing right next to you. Come here, Come here, 306 00:18:33,640 --> 00:18:38,000 Speaker 1: there's a fucking book reading going on right now? Okay, okay, 307 00:18:38,400 --> 00:18:40,280 Speaker 1: As I was saying, the book is entitled die you 308 00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:50,840 Speaker 1: Horrible Monsters, Die uh to Ma and Jesus Christ. Okay, everybody, 309 00:18:50,920 --> 00:18:55,600 Speaker 1: Now we are moving on to the he's a baby 310 00:18:55,880 --> 00:18:59,160 Speaker 1: or she's a baby or its ship? Who shot? I think? 311 00:18:59,560 --> 00:19:01,200 Speaker 1: I don't know what happened. I don't know what happened. 312 00:19:01,200 --> 00:19:04,639 Speaker 1: The arms came off. It's just it's just a doll. 313 00:19:04,800 --> 00:19:07,800 Speaker 1: That's okay. That the arms came off? That bad? Is 314 00:19:07,800 --> 00:19:10,640 Speaker 1: that bad? It's not a big it's not a big deal. 315 00:19:11,480 --> 00:19:14,399 Speaker 1: It's not a big deal. Now, what I need you 316 00:19:14,440 --> 00:19:17,840 Speaker 1: all to do? And this is a little controversial if 317 00:19:17,880 --> 00:19:20,439 Speaker 1: I'm being if I'm being honest, I need you to 318 00:19:20,680 --> 00:19:24,879 Speaker 1: be your baby, beat honest, to beat a kid. I 319 00:19:24,960 --> 00:19:29,119 Speaker 1: need you to be your baby. I'll be e b 320 00:19:28,600 --> 00:19:33,640 Speaker 1: B And so take a moment and think like a baby. 321 00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:38,480 Speaker 1: Take a moment and talk like a baby. Somebody just 322 00:19:38,560 --> 00:19:43,800 Speaker 1: came off. The legs that came off? Is that? Rick? 323 00:19:43,920 --> 00:19:48,440 Speaker 1: Why am I the only woman in this baby class? Granda? 324 00:19:48,920 --> 00:19:51,119 Speaker 1: It was I didn't get to choose. It's a group 325 00:19:51,200 --> 00:19:55,280 Speaker 1: on Okay, Like, yes, it's weird that you're the only 326 00:19:55,359 --> 00:19:58,760 Speaker 1: lady here. But then again, there's only like six people, 327 00:19:59,119 --> 00:20:02,280 Speaker 1: so the odd well, you're doing pretty good. You haven't 328 00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:04,399 Speaker 1: lost any arms, and you don't think the beating the 329 00:20:04,400 --> 00:20:06,560 Speaker 1: baby is the right thing to do, so so far 330 00:20:06,640 --> 00:20:09,680 Speaker 1: you're a winner. Rick. And so if you notice, if 331 00:20:09,720 --> 00:20:13,200 Speaker 1: you notice, we don't have many women here, and that's 332 00:20:13,920 --> 00:20:19,119 Speaker 1: a good thing. Question what do we need them for? Exactly? 333 00:20:20,560 --> 00:20:24,760 Speaker 1: Exactly no, excuse me, I can hear you say that. 334 00:20:24,840 --> 00:20:27,040 Speaker 1: And I'll tell you one thing you need a woman for. 335 00:20:27,200 --> 00:20:30,560 Speaker 1: It's to have the baby. You wouldn't have a baby 336 00:20:30,600 --> 00:20:33,159 Speaker 1: if it wasn't for a woman, period. And that is 337 00:20:33,200 --> 00:20:36,520 Speaker 1: the one thing we need them for. Very good, very 338 00:20:36,600 --> 00:20:39,960 Speaker 1: very good. Let's go. We don't need to stay for 339 00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:42,560 Speaker 1: this class. This is a bad class. I have another question. 340 00:20:42,560 --> 00:20:44,480 Speaker 1: When you say be the baby, do you mean if 341 00:20:44,480 --> 00:20:47,680 Speaker 1: I ship myself right now it's cool? Do you think 342 00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:52,080 Speaker 1: it's cool? I mean in the situation if I'm gonna 343 00:20:52,119 --> 00:20:56,280 Speaker 1: be the baby? Another question? Yes, when someone says I 344 00:20:56,400 --> 00:20:59,080 Speaker 1: slept like a baby last night? What what? What? What 345 00:20:59,119 --> 00:21:02,000 Speaker 1: should we expect from that baby sleep? Why don't we 346 00:21:02,040 --> 00:21:04,359 Speaker 1: all take a quick nap as babies, and when we 347 00:21:04,359 --> 00:21:07,800 Speaker 1: return from these naps will discuss No, you tell me 348 00:21:07,920 --> 00:21:10,640 Speaker 1: right now. I mean, Tom Brady can go anywhere. I'm 349 00:21:10,680 --> 00:21:13,720 Speaker 1: not gonna like the team, but can I talk to 350 00:21:13,760 --> 00:21:16,000 Speaker 1: you about some serious stuff for a second. I um 351 00:21:16,160 --> 00:21:19,280 Speaker 1: actually went to this all male baby class. It was 352 00:21:19,320 --> 00:21:21,480 Speaker 1: a group on thing. Originally I was looking for like 353 00:21:21,520 --> 00:21:24,480 Speaker 1: Bilder Bear, but typed in baby build a Baby. It 354 00:21:24,560 --> 00:21:27,240 Speaker 1: was a long story short. My Internet wasn't the best. 355 00:21:27,720 --> 00:21:31,200 Speaker 1: You know, the internet doesn't matter. Look, the thing I 356 00:21:31,200 --> 00:21:33,800 Speaker 1: wanted to say was that, you know, being around a 357 00:21:33,840 --> 00:21:36,720 Speaker 1: bunch of guys acting like babies, understanding how to take 358 00:21:36,760 --> 00:21:39,359 Speaker 1: care of babies, it really made me think that, I 359 00:21:39,400 --> 00:21:44,600 Speaker 1: don't know, maybe like maybe men should have babies. Cliff, Cliff, 360 00:21:44,760 --> 00:21:47,920 Speaker 1: calm down, a b Is there a like? Do I 361 00:21:47,960 --> 00:21:49,359 Speaker 1: need a shirt put? To get to the rest of 362 00:21:49,359 --> 00:21:52,920 Speaker 1: this fucking question? Heres Jesus Christ, Tommy. You know, I'm 363 00:21:52,960 --> 00:21:54,639 Speaker 1: just trying to open up to you man once in 364 00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:58,639 Speaker 1: a while. Part of me I'm happy to continue to 365 00:21:58,680 --> 00:22:00,600 Speaker 1: serve you two drinks, but I'm going to serve that 366 00:22:00,600 --> 00:22:03,359 Speaker 1: tape recorder anymore drinks. Okay, that's just that's just the 367 00:22:03,440 --> 00:22:06,000 Speaker 1: rule we've got here because the tempercuter has had too 368 00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:09,000 Speaker 1: many I don't have to answer that you know what, 369 00:22:09,000 --> 00:22:13,240 Speaker 1: we'll be taking our business somewhere else then all right, 370 00:22:13,280 --> 00:22:17,000 Speaker 1: you know I don't. Yeah, you're you're Tommy. What the 371 00:22:17,040 --> 00:22:19,760 Speaker 1: hell you're talking about? What are you? Tommy? You're fucking hammered, man, 372 00:22:20,119 --> 00:22:22,280 Speaker 1: You're hammered out of your ass. Listen, dude, I just 373 00:22:22,320 --> 00:22:24,120 Speaker 1: want to open up to you emotionally. I really feel 374 00:22:24,160 --> 00:22:27,840 Speaker 1: like you're blocked talking about and now I need you 375 00:22:28,560 --> 00:22:34,080 Speaker 1: to call out. Yes, that's right. Anybody can call out, 376 00:22:34,359 --> 00:22:42,600 Speaker 1: call out, call out, Rhonda. I just can't do this. 377 00:22:42,600 --> 00:22:44,919 Speaker 1: This is ridiculous. This is a bunch of men acting 378 00:22:44,960 --> 00:22:47,879 Speaker 1: like babies. Rick, if you want, you can stay here, 379 00:22:47,920 --> 00:22:51,680 Speaker 1: but I'm leaving right now. Try um um hey everyone, 380 00:22:51,760 --> 00:22:55,760 Speaker 1: it's me the baby. I'm a genius. I can talk already, 381 00:22:55,760 --> 00:22:59,639 Speaker 1: and I'm a baby. Very good, Rhonda, can we hear 382 00:22:59,680 --> 00:23:02,600 Speaker 1: your baby? You? Goodbye? Rick, goodbye, I'm leaving. Goodbye, goodbye 383 00:23:02,600 --> 00:23:05,119 Speaker 1: all of you. Goodbye. Hey, Rhonda, before you leave, can 384 00:23:05,160 --> 00:23:10,800 Speaker 1: I just say you're very attractive? Too late, I'm already pregnant, 385 00:23:10,840 --> 00:23:13,800 Speaker 1: So bye bye. Rick. Are you gonna just let that 386 00:23:13,840 --> 00:23:16,840 Speaker 1: slide or what's the deal? Man? Jeez, Rick, you're not 387 00:23:16,840 --> 00:23:20,920 Speaker 1: gonna handle your business. You got you got cockled, dude. 388 00:23:20,960 --> 00:23:26,000 Speaker 1: You look, I'm not I'm axident prone and I just, 389 00:23:26,400 --> 00:23:28,919 Speaker 1: you know, the whole the baby thing was a whoomsie. 390 00:23:29,280 --> 00:23:32,320 Speaker 1: So I just I don't know. I don't know what 391 00:23:32,400 --> 00:23:36,600 Speaker 1: to do with my life anymore. Guys, that's amazing. So 392 00:23:36,680 --> 00:23:38,760 Speaker 1: you you run a group on business? Is that right? 393 00:23:38,880 --> 00:23:41,440 Speaker 1: Is that that's amazing? I never heard of that. I 394 00:23:41,480 --> 00:23:43,560 Speaker 1: felt like businesses like used group on, but I didn't 395 00:23:43,560 --> 00:23:47,000 Speaker 1: know like your business was run on group on, Like 396 00:23:47,040 --> 00:23:51,200 Speaker 1: it's only a three group on. I don't understand the question. 397 00:23:54,600 --> 00:23:57,280 Speaker 1: What the question? I was thinking, you need the rest 398 00:23:57,320 --> 00:24:00,960 Speaker 1: of the well, I see the way the way I 399 00:24:01,000 --> 00:24:04,040 Speaker 1: see it's like, yeah, we need a mom, you know 400 00:24:04,080 --> 00:24:06,359 Speaker 1: what I mean. But sorry, without be anything else or 401 00:24:06,359 --> 00:24:10,720 Speaker 1: did you guys want to hear the dessert specials? Actually 402 00:24:10,720 --> 00:24:13,600 Speaker 1: I would I was wanting to get We're good, We're good, 403 00:24:13,600 --> 00:24:17,480 Speaker 1: thank you, hold on checking. I want to get something 404 00:24:17,520 --> 00:24:19,400 Speaker 1: to eat. I would like to get something more to eat. 405 00:24:20,640 --> 00:24:23,600 Speaker 1: We have the New York cheesecake, we have the same cheesecake, 406 00:24:23,720 --> 00:24:26,400 Speaker 1: we have the Miami cheesecake, and we have the Augusta 407 00:24:26,440 --> 00:24:29,440 Speaker 1: Georgia cheeze cake. All right. I wanted to actually order 408 00:24:29,480 --> 00:24:32,760 Speaker 1: a main I didn't want to just go straight to dessert. So, uh, 409 00:24:33,119 --> 00:24:36,879 Speaker 1: want you mean like an entree? Yes, I don't know 410 00:24:36,920 --> 00:24:39,040 Speaker 1: where you're from, but Maine don't know what does that mean? 411 00:24:39,440 --> 00:24:42,560 Speaker 1: So you'd like to hear the entree specials? No, they 412 00:24:42,600 --> 00:24:44,280 Speaker 1: knew what I meant when I said Maine. Hold on 413 00:24:44,320 --> 00:24:47,320 Speaker 1: a second, you knew what I mean. Said wow, I 414 00:24:47,320 --> 00:24:50,359 Speaker 1: mean the word, sir. I'm sensing you want to check. 415 00:24:50,640 --> 00:24:53,400 Speaker 1: Is this part breaking? But I think the fries were 416 00:24:53,440 --> 00:24:57,520 Speaker 1: good enough. This lady is, Hey, Cheryl, can I talk 417 00:24:57,560 --> 00:25:00,439 Speaker 1: to you? You're very rude to that table. We are 418 00:25:00,560 --> 00:25:03,640 Speaker 1: the cheesecake factory and they have a lot of options, 419 00:25:04,080 --> 00:25:06,480 Speaker 1: and you only gave them a couple of the cheesecake options. 420 00:25:06,480 --> 00:25:09,800 Speaker 1: And there are seventy five there are a hundred and 421 00:25:09,840 --> 00:25:13,000 Speaker 1: seventy five options there are, and um, could you please 422 00:25:13,080 --> 00:25:15,399 Speaker 1: rattle off the top fifty cellars right now least so 423 00:25:15,440 --> 00:25:18,119 Speaker 1: I know that your head is in the game. Ok. Fine, 424 00:25:18,200 --> 00:25:22,080 Speaker 1: I'm sorry. There was an accident at the cheesecake factory. 425 00:25:22,920 --> 00:25:26,520 Speaker 1: Some of the molten cheesecake spun out and it burned 426 00:25:26,560 --> 00:25:31,600 Speaker 1: a whole bunch of the workers. It wasn't disaster disaster 427 00:25:31,840 --> 00:25:36,679 Speaker 1: at the factory, and that was a field reporter at 428 00:25:36,680 --> 00:25:40,840 Speaker 1: the cheesecake factory and Marina del Rey reporting a difficult 429 00:25:41,560 --> 00:25:45,200 Speaker 1: lunch for a couple of folks. And now Sports and Weather, 430 00:25:45,600 --> 00:25:49,879 Speaker 1: done both by Charles Gibins. Charles, Hey, Bruce, I'm just 431 00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:52,359 Speaker 1: so in your ear right now, that was really insensitive 432 00:25:52,400 --> 00:25:55,560 Speaker 1: the way you talked about that. Okay, these cheesecake words 433 00:25:56,600 --> 00:26:01,480 Speaker 1: burned up? All right, Yeah there's chairman. Yeah, there's a 434 00:26:01,480 --> 00:26:04,800 Speaker 1: guy in reporting that people are burning up. You know, 435 00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:08,159 Speaker 1: it's it's it's tragic enough. It's I think of the 436 00:26:08,200 --> 00:26:10,720 Speaker 1: history of the way people tune in for sports and weather. 437 00:26:11,080 --> 00:26:13,359 Speaker 1: I'm sorry. People are down on white bruise. You know, 438 00:26:13,359 --> 00:26:15,439 Speaker 1: white bruise. You know why they turn in for sports 439 00:26:15,440 --> 00:26:18,480 Speaker 1: and weather because you're not given the two of them. 440 00:26:18,480 --> 00:26:21,760 Speaker 1: All right, you gotta And now is the time where 441 00:26:21,800 --> 00:26:25,800 Speaker 1: we turn to our partners. Um, all all the men 442 00:26:25,840 --> 00:26:27,560 Speaker 1: in the room, here is some my women. I need 443 00:26:27,600 --> 00:26:30,399 Speaker 1: you to suck all upon the teat of your partner. 444 00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:36,119 Speaker 1: Now they say men can't produce milk. I disagree. So 445 00:26:36,240 --> 00:26:39,000 Speaker 1: please take a moment. I'm much from the lights down. 446 00:26:39,160 --> 00:26:43,240 Speaker 1: I'm gonna put little ya and you are just begin 447 00:26:43,280 --> 00:26:49,720 Speaker 1: to suckle. Let me hear the suckles please good. Hey Devin, 448 00:26:49,880 --> 00:26:54,720 Speaker 1: I'm worried man, not much, not much. Um Like me 449 00:26:54,760 --> 00:26:56,240 Speaker 1: and a couple of guys. We're gonna go over to 450 00:26:56,320 --> 00:26:59,000 Speaker 1: this baby party later and I want to know if 451 00:26:59,080 --> 00:27:02,480 Speaker 1: you wanted to, if I wanted to, what to come 452 00:27:02,520 --> 00:27:07,040 Speaker 1: with us two of the baby party. Yeah. A lot 453 00:27:07,040 --> 00:27:08,679 Speaker 1: of the other guys said you're gonna be difficult to 454 00:27:08,680 --> 00:27:13,119 Speaker 1: ask and I shouldn't do it, but well maybe they 455 00:27:13,160 --> 00:27:16,640 Speaker 1: know me better than you. Yeah, but I just really 456 00:27:16,640 --> 00:27:18,760 Speaker 1: wanted to extend a hand here, you know what I mean. 457 00:27:18,880 --> 00:27:20,879 Speaker 1: So while you're a giver not a taker, and I 458 00:27:20,920 --> 00:27:24,960 Speaker 1: appreciate that. And so take this back to the other guys. Hey, 459 00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:27,840 Speaker 1: fucker's you were right? He was an asshole? Okay, cool 460 00:27:27,880 --> 00:27:33,680 Speaker 1: man anyway, uh honey or rough day at the office. 461 00:27:33,720 --> 00:27:36,240 Speaker 1: I said the Spurs had a chance of showers. I 462 00:27:36,320 --> 00:27:44,440 Speaker 1: really fucked it. That has seen to everybody. Oh he's 463 00:27:44,480 --> 00:27:51,959 Speaker 1: doing sports and weather. Scene three comes to us from 464 00:27:52,000 --> 00:27:55,680 Speaker 1: patron v I P. Robert, who wrote, James, don't read 465 00:27:55,720 --> 00:27:59,119 Speaker 1: this as a reminded for those of you. James and 466 00:27:59,160 --> 00:28:04,080 Speaker 1: I both read the patron v I p emails and James, 467 00:28:04,160 --> 00:28:05,679 Speaker 1: as it turns out, does not like to know what 468 00:28:05,720 --> 00:28:08,479 Speaker 1: the scene suggestions are in advance. I don't know how 469 00:28:08,480 --> 00:28:13,240 Speaker 1: many times I have to explain this. Uh, Robert writes, 470 00:28:13,359 --> 00:28:16,280 Speaker 1: hello again, gang, top notch work is always. My love 471 00:28:16,440 --> 00:28:19,480 Speaker 1: for you all grows each episode. But I must declare 472 00:28:19,520 --> 00:28:23,760 Speaker 1: my undying devotion to Craig especially. I read this purposely 473 00:28:24,119 --> 00:28:26,920 Speaker 1: when Craig wasn't with us, because I feel like he's 474 00:28:27,000 --> 00:28:32,360 Speaker 1: confident enough. Yeah, what silky pipes of silliness he possesses. 475 00:28:32,440 --> 00:28:34,600 Speaker 1: Yeah we're not gonna tell him that, but it's great 476 00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:37,080 Speaker 1: that you shared it, and I wanted to read your email. 477 00:28:37,680 --> 00:28:42,080 Speaker 1: Um anyway, here's my brief scene suggestion, the hidden life 478 00:28:42,800 --> 00:28:48,600 Speaker 1: of pasta. Cheers, thanks by thank you, Robert. Just get 479 00:28:48,640 --> 00:28:52,520 Speaker 1: any pasta. It doesn't matter, it doesn't matter. Well, of 480 00:28:52,560 --> 00:28:55,640 Speaker 1: course it matters. There's seventeen pastas to choose from. It's 481 00:28:55,680 --> 00:28:58,680 Speaker 1: just dry tubed bread. It tastes all the fun. Oh 482 00:28:58,720 --> 00:29:02,720 Speaker 1: my god, so you've never It's caused me I cut 483 00:29:02,720 --> 00:29:06,400 Speaker 1: the help. But you must really like the different kinds 484 00:29:06,400 --> 00:29:09,360 Speaker 1: of pasta. Luigi, thank you? Yes, what if I was 485 00:29:09,400 --> 00:29:12,440 Speaker 1: to tell you that there's a secret menu that isn't here? 486 00:29:13,120 --> 00:29:16,720 Speaker 1: Keep talking in the back. We have what looks to 487 00:29:16,760 --> 00:29:19,920 Speaker 1: be like a fish stick or an aquarium. But inside, 488 00:29:20,440 --> 00:29:23,440 Speaker 1: inside of the fish stink, there are different kinds of 489 00:29:23,600 --> 00:29:27,280 Speaker 1: noodles that are alive. Would you like to see them? 490 00:29:27,760 --> 00:29:29,040 Speaker 1: You want us to go in the back to see 491 00:29:29,040 --> 00:29:32,720 Speaker 1: live noodles swimming in a fish stank? I tell you 492 00:29:32,760 --> 00:29:35,080 Speaker 1: are allowed that. Everybody here we want to go to 493 00:29:35,120 --> 00:29:36,720 Speaker 1: the back. And that's not going to be very helpy. 494 00:29:36,760 --> 00:29:40,000 Speaker 1: Can I feel like we're being taken to be whacked? What? Yeah? 495 00:29:40,520 --> 00:29:43,680 Speaker 1: All right, listen, Dracula. Look, we gave you a shot. Okay, 496 00:29:44,120 --> 00:29:46,880 Speaker 1: gave you a shot. What are you talking about? Gave 497 00:29:46,920 --> 00:29:51,560 Speaker 1: you a shot at um before you I didn't believe 498 00:29:51,560 --> 00:29:54,760 Speaker 1: in mummies. I didn't believe in wolf things. Whatever. We're 499 00:29:54,800 --> 00:29:59,000 Speaker 1: trying a new thing here. We're open to all. I 500 00:29:59,040 --> 00:30:02,600 Speaker 1: don't mind you give being some personal tips. That's nice. 501 00:30:02,760 --> 00:30:05,320 Speaker 1: We want you to bring your flavor. But you're bringing 502 00:30:05,320 --> 00:30:07,880 Speaker 1: people in the back. Now, that's an insurance hazard, you 503 00:30:07,920 --> 00:30:11,840 Speaker 1: get it right. Let me tell you something that many 504 00:30:11,880 --> 00:30:18,640 Speaker 1: people realize. Okay, so your past work history here, Well, okay, 505 00:30:18,640 --> 00:30:22,520 Speaker 1: there's a couple of thousand years gap here between Ralph's 506 00:30:22,640 --> 00:30:27,520 Speaker 1: and uh you were helping make the pyramids? Is that correct? Yes? 507 00:30:27,880 --> 00:30:31,680 Speaker 1: But that my boss. You cannot. He probably wouldn't give 508 00:30:31,760 --> 00:30:34,520 Speaker 1: me as good a review as you might need, so honestly, 509 00:30:34,800 --> 00:30:37,840 Speaker 1: probably not to call him. You don't want me to 510 00:30:37,880 --> 00:30:42,360 Speaker 1: talk to your Ralph's manager. Ralph's manager especially not. In fact, 511 00:30:42,480 --> 00:30:45,160 Speaker 1: why don't we just begin a new relationship right now? 512 00:30:45,920 --> 00:30:47,600 Speaker 1: How about I clean up you? That's really quick and 513 00:30:48,240 --> 00:30:50,960 Speaker 1: damn we go. Sure you don't gotta get that close 514 00:30:51,000 --> 00:30:55,920 Speaker 1: to my neck Ralph's Uh, this is Tom speaking. How 515 00:30:56,000 --> 00:31:01,920 Speaker 1: m I help you? Hey? Uh, I'm just wondering y'all 516 00:31:01,960 --> 00:31:06,080 Speaker 1: got toilet paper right now? We do have toilet papers? Sure, Yes, 517 00:31:06,200 --> 00:31:08,320 Speaker 1: we don't have too many brands, and we definitely don't 518 00:31:08,320 --> 00:31:15,080 Speaker 1: have Charman Ultrasoft, but we do have some toilet paper, yes, okay. Also, um, 519 00:31:15,120 --> 00:31:19,880 Speaker 1: you got any of them Seltzer's that um got alcohols 520 00:31:19,920 --> 00:31:23,760 Speaker 1: in them, but that tastes still like fruit times. So 521 00:31:24,040 --> 00:31:30,000 Speaker 1: the Boon's Farm a Seltzer is back, yes, and we're excited. 522 00:31:30,080 --> 00:31:33,240 Speaker 1: It's available now in six flavors. Do you want to 523 00:31:33,240 --> 00:31:35,480 Speaker 1: hear the flavors? I would love to hear the flavors. 524 00:31:35,480 --> 00:31:39,800 Speaker 1: Please tell muss. Okay, we've got heeney Berry, We've got 525 00:31:40,840 --> 00:31:49,040 Speaker 1: lime James, We've got straw Joey. Okay, and um oh 526 00:31:49,120 --> 00:31:52,680 Speaker 1: we did get the Uh the macaroni is on fire Man. 527 00:31:53,360 --> 00:31:57,880 Speaker 1: Excuse me, what is it now? The macaroni is on 528 00:31:58,120 --> 00:32:02,600 Speaker 1: fire Man. Okay, So there's a special sale on macaroni. 529 00:32:02,600 --> 00:32:04,719 Speaker 1: Are you interested in that at ulcer? Yeah? I like 530 00:32:04,920 --> 00:32:07,880 Speaker 1: I like macaroni. That sounds good. I come down. Uh. 531 00:32:07,920 --> 00:32:10,120 Speaker 1: You know, I've been to Booze Farm once. I went 532 00:32:11,080 --> 00:32:16,400 Speaker 1: I want to raffle, and I got to go. Yeah, 533 00:32:16,600 --> 00:32:19,000 Speaker 1: you know it's kinna. It's just a live uber and 534 00:32:19,040 --> 00:32:21,200 Speaker 1: people around all that. But I don't mind a mass. 535 00:32:21,240 --> 00:32:23,280 Speaker 1: You're just heading over to Ralphs. Is that right? Just 536 00:32:23,280 --> 00:32:26,240 Speaker 1: a little quick stop. Yeah, I'm heading over to pick 537 00:32:26,320 --> 00:32:29,320 Speaker 1: up some macaroni, And then showed them my scrap book 538 00:32:29,360 --> 00:32:32,800 Speaker 1: of my time at Boone's. Oh yeah, Boone, I want 539 00:32:32,800 --> 00:32:35,000 Speaker 1: a raffle, a little giveaway. Got over there. We got 540 00:32:35,000 --> 00:32:37,240 Speaker 1: a little chance to walk around the farm. Yeah. I 541 00:32:37,280 --> 00:32:39,320 Speaker 1: did the same thing. This is I went back in 542 00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:44,200 Speaker 1: two when you go, I went there ninety two. That's 543 00:32:44,240 --> 00:32:47,200 Speaker 1: also when I went. Oh the hell, I went in August, 544 00:32:47,360 --> 00:32:52,120 Speaker 1: mid August ninety two. I went in mid August and 545 00:32:52,360 --> 00:32:56,080 Speaker 1: ninety two two. Look at that. That's crazy. I. I I 546 00:32:56,280 --> 00:33:00,600 Speaker 1: stayed in the in the chateau up by the vines. 547 00:33:02,080 --> 00:33:04,920 Speaker 1: I stayed at the shut to put the bon the 548 00:33:05,040 --> 00:33:08,560 Speaker 1: vines too, look said, I slept in a kink bad. 549 00:33:10,400 --> 00:33:12,440 Speaker 1: Now it was the floor for me. You know, I 550 00:33:12,560 --> 00:33:15,600 Speaker 1: used to I usually do work over at the cheesecake factory. 551 00:33:15,600 --> 00:33:17,520 Speaker 1: I don't want to just just open up about me. 552 00:33:17,560 --> 00:33:19,360 Speaker 1: But I feel like I'm driving and I can at 553 00:33:19,400 --> 00:33:22,800 Speaker 1: any moment just kill us. So you know, I was 554 00:33:22,880 --> 00:33:25,520 Speaker 1: working there and I and I decided, as I hate 555 00:33:25,560 --> 00:33:27,560 Speaker 1: you know what I wanna, I want to do something different. 556 00:33:27,560 --> 00:33:29,479 Speaker 1: I got out before that crazy you did you hear 557 00:33:29,480 --> 00:33:33,640 Speaker 1: about that crazy cheesecake factory? That a dracula on the road. 558 00:33:33,640 --> 00:33:40,120 Speaker 1: There's a dragon. Oh well that was easy. Huh. Oh 559 00:33:40,200 --> 00:33:43,440 Speaker 1: my god, I kind of just right. You're driving the car. 560 00:33:43,480 --> 00:33:46,280 Speaker 1: You're not driving garlics and steak and stuff. So he'll 561 00:33:46,320 --> 00:33:52,680 Speaker 1: be okay, he'll amen to that moment. Welcome. If you 562 00:33:52,720 --> 00:33:56,640 Speaker 1: are here, it's because you were giving an invitation. No, 563 00:33:56,760 --> 00:33:59,280 Speaker 1: we asked you all to take a seat. Say nothing, 564 00:34:00,040 --> 00:34:02,680 Speaker 1: sit around the table. Place? Do we just sit anywhere? 565 00:34:02,800 --> 00:34:07,320 Speaker 1: I said, please? Please? Now you'll see there's a hand 566 00:34:07,400 --> 00:34:08,960 Speaker 1: towel in front of all of you. I was gonna 567 00:34:09,040 --> 00:34:11,359 Speaker 1: sit there. I need you to put that over your head. 568 00:34:11,360 --> 00:34:14,840 Speaker 1: I'm sitting here. Now go ahead and place the towel 569 00:34:14,920 --> 00:34:18,600 Speaker 1: over your head. Now, this was gonna sit there. I 570 00:34:18,640 --> 00:34:20,520 Speaker 1: understand what I'm sitting here, and I this is a 571 00:34:20,560 --> 00:34:25,879 Speaker 1: barrier between you and God himself. The seats open down there. 572 00:34:25,960 --> 00:34:28,560 Speaker 1: Just just switch with me. Yeah. See, if you're asked 573 00:34:28,560 --> 00:34:31,160 Speaker 1: fits in one, he should not see what you are 574 00:34:31,200 --> 00:34:33,160 Speaker 1: about to. Doesn't matter if I asked fits him. You 575 00:34:33,160 --> 00:34:35,359 Speaker 1: saw me make you saw me walking towards this chair, 576 00:34:35,680 --> 00:34:39,600 Speaker 1: and yes, and you cut me off? Right? Then is 577 00:34:39,600 --> 00:34:43,080 Speaker 1: your problem? You just needing garlic? Yeah, I've been eating garlic. 578 00:34:43,400 --> 00:34:46,400 Speaker 1: Smell like a fucking vampire. Dude, I wouldn't smell like 579 00:34:46,400 --> 00:34:49,920 Speaker 1: a vampire. They hate garlic. They hate garlic. What that 580 00:34:49,960 --> 00:34:52,719 Speaker 1: guy tell us not to talk? Shut the ship. We'll 581 00:34:52,719 --> 00:34:55,520 Speaker 1: be coming out. Shut. Then you will notice you will 582 00:34:55,960 --> 00:35:11,480 Speaker 1: all only have war bunch. Fucking This evening is over. 583 00:35:11,560 --> 00:35:14,480 Speaker 1: I tried, I tried, I'm out. I'm gone. Thank you 584 00:35:14,800 --> 00:35:21,600 Speaker 1: so long. Hey, Tim, how's the class go? First of all, Phil, 585 00:35:21,640 --> 00:35:25,040 Speaker 1: it's not a class, okay, it's a secret. You know. 586 00:35:25,080 --> 00:35:27,239 Speaker 1: I have to explain this to every fucking month it's 587 00:35:27,239 --> 00:35:30,600 Speaker 1: a secret society where we eat things that God shouldn't 588 00:35:30,600 --> 00:35:33,719 Speaker 1: be seeing us eat. Okay, last night was supposed to 589 00:35:33,760 --> 00:35:37,480 Speaker 1: be one one piece of pennay, a forbidden pain ay 590 00:35:37,640 --> 00:35:39,399 Speaker 1: as it were. But I don't need to get into 591 00:35:39,400 --> 00:35:41,640 Speaker 1: all this with you. Where did the pay come from? 592 00:35:41,680 --> 00:35:43,839 Speaker 1: That's not that's not your business, Phil it As a 593 00:35:43,840 --> 00:35:46,880 Speaker 1: matter of fact, this isn't working out either, Rent, by 594 00:35:46,880 --> 00:35:51,080 Speaker 1: the way, No, no, hey, listen, hey, listen to fucking asholes. 595 00:35:51,080 --> 00:35:53,239 Speaker 1: Listen all right, listen up. I need this whole damn 596 00:35:53,280 --> 00:35:56,880 Speaker 1: floor covered in share competing now. Okay, so shut the 597 00:35:56,880 --> 00:36:00,359 Speaker 1: funk up and get the goddamn sha compety. Okay, Yeah, 598 00:36:00,400 --> 00:36:05,720 Speaker 1: we're getting on it, Jim, jesus, I'm sorry. I'm sorry 599 00:36:05,719 --> 00:36:08,440 Speaker 1: I called it a class again. I always forget. I'm sorry, 600 00:36:08,480 --> 00:36:11,640 Speaker 1: I really am. It's okay. It's a secret society, and 601 00:36:11,640 --> 00:36:13,480 Speaker 1: I just want to be a part of it, you know, No, 602 00:36:13,760 --> 00:36:16,080 Speaker 1: I know, it's just I don't want to mix our 603 00:36:16,120 --> 00:36:20,200 Speaker 1: living situation with my professional stuff. Anyway. Will you will 604 00:36:20,200 --> 00:36:22,000 Speaker 1: you hand me the cutter? Please? Yeah? Here we go, 605 00:36:22,360 --> 00:36:27,560 Speaker 1: thank you? Okay. How many people showed up at the society, Uh? 606 00:36:27,600 --> 00:36:31,400 Speaker 1: There was twelve. Twelve showed up. Yeah, but but we 607 00:36:31,440 --> 00:36:34,360 Speaker 1: didn't finish because somebody screamed cock punished and he was like, 608 00:36:34,480 --> 00:36:36,560 Speaker 1: and that was the word thing too, is it? Why 609 00:36:36,600 --> 00:36:38,239 Speaker 1: are you calling out what punches you're doing? And it 610 00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:40,920 Speaker 1: just it devolved. It's supposed to be isn't supposed to 611 00:36:40,960 --> 00:36:43,600 Speaker 1: be silent during the It's supposed to be setting, sir, 612 00:36:44,000 --> 00:36:48,759 Speaker 1: It's supposed to be silent. Your rugs done, the carpets down. 613 00:36:48,840 --> 00:36:55,040 Speaker 1: I mean, dad, you got fired from else Well, it 614 00:36:55,440 --> 00:36:58,880 Speaker 1: wasn't working out. I was just trying to be helpful, 615 00:36:59,680 --> 00:37:02,520 Speaker 1: tell the truth. Is it odd to you that I 616 00:37:02,600 --> 00:37:10,080 Speaker 1: have living pasta well, you know it's yes, it's a 617 00:37:10,080 --> 00:37:14,719 Speaker 1: little weird for sure. But I feel like that you're 618 00:37:14,800 --> 00:37:20,360 Speaker 1: making excuse for not working anymore. No, no, no, I've 619 00:37:20,640 --> 00:37:23,960 Speaker 1: I've put lots of work together in my lifetime. I 620 00:37:23,960 --> 00:37:26,120 Speaker 1: feel like this is just a job to, you know, 621 00:37:26,400 --> 00:37:31,360 Speaker 1: keep myself busy. And you're so embarrassing. You know what, Tracula, 622 00:37:31,680 --> 00:37:33,840 Speaker 1: I said, fuck it, you know what, I was willing 623 00:37:33,880 --> 00:37:36,000 Speaker 1: to live with an eternal being, with the hopes that 624 00:37:36,040 --> 00:37:37,120 Speaker 1: you were going to be I don't know, have some 625 00:37:37,200 --> 00:37:39,839 Speaker 1: kind of pellacialist state and money from Rome and also 626 00:37:39,920 --> 00:37:43,840 Speaker 1: there ship but You're just another broke, goddamn cryptid and 627 00:37:43,880 --> 00:37:49,279 Speaker 1: I'm sucking out of here. Okay, I'm taking don't I have. 628 00:37:49,520 --> 00:37:51,920 Speaker 1: I'm on a fixed int come, Okay, every month I 629 00:37:51,920 --> 00:37:54,319 Speaker 1: get a certain amount of anything extra I have to 630 00:37:54,360 --> 00:38:00,279 Speaker 1: make on my own bullshit, Okay, I'm okay. How many 631 00:38:00,280 --> 00:38:04,879 Speaker 1: of my friends have you just just drained? Okay, drained 632 00:38:04,920 --> 00:38:07,279 Speaker 1: and I get nothing. I'm out of here, buddy, I'm 633 00:38:07,280 --> 00:38:11,400 Speaker 1: sucking Vegas. I'm moving to Vegas. I don't care. And 634 00:38:11,440 --> 00:38:14,880 Speaker 1: then mom left dead? Is I don't understand this? And 635 00:38:14,920 --> 00:38:19,200 Speaker 1: then you don't show up to coach little league teams. 636 00:38:19,760 --> 00:38:22,600 Speaker 1: I'm sorry, honestly, I don't. I just don't feel like 637 00:38:22,640 --> 00:38:27,560 Speaker 1: it's appropriate. Uh well, we can't have night games, that's 638 00:38:27,680 --> 00:38:31,239 Speaker 1: uh all the games have to be. Some of the 639 00:38:31,280 --> 00:38:33,920 Speaker 1: most exciting games happen at night. You just couldn't do 640 00:38:33,960 --> 00:38:37,759 Speaker 1: the evening games like after sundown. Well, I mean, the 641 00:38:37,800 --> 00:38:40,120 Speaker 1: field just don't have lights at to public school. We 642 00:38:40,200 --> 00:38:42,200 Speaker 1: just don't have the money to build that kind of 643 00:38:42,239 --> 00:38:44,279 Speaker 1: infrastructure that what if we had a glow in the 644 00:38:44,360 --> 00:38:49,319 Speaker 1: dark ball, wouldn't that be fine? Uh No. Nerve kind 645 00:38:49,320 --> 00:38:50,640 Speaker 1: of came out with those a couple of years ago. 646 00:38:50,680 --> 00:38:55,640 Speaker 1: And they're actually super dangerous. So h, I mean, I 647 00:38:55,680 --> 00:38:58,080 Speaker 1: don't know. They're kids, they're I mean they're eight year 648 00:38:58,080 --> 00:39:04,080 Speaker 1: old kids. They can't. You just gonna find another little 649 00:39:04,160 --> 00:39:09,560 Speaker 1: league coach? Okay, alright, that I got two cases of 650 00:39:09,640 --> 00:39:11,759 Speaker 1: macaroni and a cup boom from I'm gonna put him 651 00:39:11,840 --> 00:39:13,520 Speaker 1: up here so you can check me out. Say where 652 00:39:13,560 --> 00:39:17,520 Speaker 1: did that Dracula fella go? That? Usually he's here on Thursdays. Yeah, no, 653 00:39:17,719 --> 00:39:20,720 Speaker 1: he quit. He didn't like working here for some reason. 654 00:39:20,840 --> 00:39:22,960 Speaker 1: All right, he got fired. I'm sorry. I don't know 655 00:39:23,000 --> 00:39:26,279 Speaker 1: what to say. He was uncomfortable. He's kept talking about 656 00:39:26,320 --> 00:39:29,840 Speaker 1: living pasta like that was a thing. Uh, did you 657 00:39:29,840 --> 00:39:32,160 Speaker 1: want anything else? Sir? Do you have a Ralph's card? 658 00:39:33,000 --> 00:39:34,560 Speaker 1: I don't have a WOMY, but I can put in 659 00:39:34,600 --> 00:39:41,799 Speaker 1: my number. I go ahead type it in. I'm not six. Yeah, Uh, 660 00:39:41,920 --> 00:39:43,839 Speaker 1: it's you're supposed to be your phone number. Sir. We're 661 00:39:43,840 --> 00:39:48,359 Speaker 1: gonna need seven digits. Oh I see um six yep 662 00:39:48,600 --> 00:39:55,399 Speaker 1: six oh boy yex. Someone summoned me. Do you need 663 00:39:55,520 --> 00:39:59,319 Speaker 1: discounts on your grocery? Yeah? Can you roll your card 664 00:39:59,360 --> 00:40:02,920 Speaker 1: through this and get a discount place? I don't want 665 00:40:03,800 --> 00:40:09,600 Speaker 1: who has discount? Excuse me, you have a discount third devil, Yeah, 666 00:40:09,760 --> 00:40:12,399 Speaker 1: is there an issue? It doesn't matter to me which 667 00:40:12,440 --> 00:40:17,320 Speaker 1: one of you got scan the work here is due. 668 00:40:18,560 --> 00:40:21,680 Speaker 1: So you just conjure him up whenever you need him those. Yeah. Yeah, 669 00:40:21,800 --> 00:40:26,840 Speaker 1: I subscribe to a Satanic savings program, right so whenever 670 00:40:27,239 --> 00:40:29,279 Speaker 1: at some place, and like even it works on live 671 00:40:29,360 --> 00:40:33,279 Speaker 1: too if I don't know a coupon code without suthing him. Right. God, 672 00:40:33,360 --> 00:40:35,680 Speaker 1: he tries to budge sometimes that they don't work, like 673 00:40:35,719 --> 00:40:39,160 Speaker 1: they expired. Like it seems like it's ninety five or 674 00:40:39,200 --> 00:40:43,239 Speaker 1: step work. What is it that's like outdated? Yeah. I 675 00:40:43,760 --> 00:40:48,200 Speaker 1: remember looking up on the Google there some discount codes 676 00:40:48,680 --> 00:40:51,440 Speaker 1: and it said Satan's discount. I thought that can't be right. 677 00:40:51,480 --> 00:40:54,759 Speaker 1: But you're saying it works. Yeah, yeah, no, it's it 678 00:40:54,760 --> 00:40:57,319 Speaker 1: works all the time. He gets me great savings. Um, 679 00:40:57,560 --> 00:40:59,799 Speaker 1: I mean he does on part of my soul. But 680 00:41:00,520 --> 00:41:03,359 Speaker 1: it's worth it right now to be able to keep 681 00:41:03,400 --> 00:41:05,280 Speaker 1: things lean in my pocket. You know what I'm saying. 682 00:41:05,719 --> 00:41:07,439 Speaker 1: I do know. I'm just saying, you're just a part 683 00:41:07,440 --> 00:41:10,479 Speaker 1: of your soul. That's it. Just for a little piece. Yeah, 684 00:41:10,520 --> 00:41:13,239 Speaker 1: whatever percentage he gets me off of things, that's how 685 00:41:13,320 --> 00:41:15,640 Speaker 1: much of my soul he gets, so it adds up 686 00:41:15,640 --> 00:41:17,920 Speaker 1: over time. Got you got you with the average of 687 00:41:17,960 --> 00:41:21,200 Speaker 1: all the percentages, so you know the median or the 688 00:41:21,239 --> 00:41:23,279 Speaker 1: mean or whatever. So right now, he gives you pretty 689 00:41:23,280 --> 00:41:25,359 Speaker 1: good savings and he owns thirty one percent of my soul. 690 00:41:26,280 --> 00:41:30,080 Speaker 1: That's not bad. That's not bad at all, all right, Uh, 691 00:41:30,640 --> 00:41:38,840 Speaker 1: trucula high for a position at satan savings. Yes, I'd 692 00:41:38,920 --> 00:41:40,839 Speaker 1: like to get a job, but I want to make 693 00:41:40,880 --> 00:41:43,200 Speaker 1: sure that I'm a good fit because I've been really 694 00:41:43,239 --> 00:41:45,800 Speaker 1: feeling bad every time I lose a job and people 695 00:41:45,840 --> 00:41:47,840 Speaker 1: say that. I just so I feel like maybe I 696 00:41:47,880 --> 00:41:51,680 Speaker 1: fit very well here. I think you will. I don't 697 00:41:51,719 --> 00:41:56,160 Speaker 1: think you're getting the appreciation you deserve. Now, let me 698 00:41:56,239 --> 00:41:59,560 Speaker 1: just say one thing. This is quite jotting too many people, 699 00:41:59,800 --> 00:42:03,040 Speaker 1: But I've got a good friend, Dr Frankenstein, and he's 700 00:42:03,120 --> 00:42:05,759 Speaker 1: created the pasta that's not like any other pasta. It 701 00:42:05,880 --> 00:42:10,120 Speaker 1: in itself is like alive. Would you mind if we 702 00:42:10,320 --> 00:42:15,000 Speaker 1: sold that here as well? Mm hmm, it seems pretty 703 00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:18,200 Speaker 1: far fetched. There's a fish tank that I have in 704 00:42:18,280 --> 00:42:22,440 Speaker 1: my trunk. It I'd love to show you the pasta 705 00:42:22,520 --> 00:42:28,040 Speaker 1: that's inside of it. Lonely, Oh my god, that of course, 706 00:42:28,080 --> 00:42:30,319 Speaker 1: I'm lonely. My wife left me, my child hates me 707 00:42:30,320 --> 00:42:32,960 Speaker 1: because I kind of do Little League. Please, I'd meet 708 00:42:33,000 --> 00:42:38,520 Speaker 1: to belong somewhere, and he took the fish tank inside 709 00:42:38,960 --> 00:42:41,759 Speaker 1: and he lived out his days there. Now there's any 710 00:42:41,840 --> 00:42:43,719 Speaker 1: questions in the Barnes and Noble crowd, I'm happy to 711 00:42:43,760 --> 00:42:47,480 Speaker 1: take them. Yeah, how I'm gonna take to write this 712 00:42:47,520 --> 00:42:54,600 Speaker 1: one about forty five minutes. Any other question? Is it 713 00:42:54,640 --> 00:42:56,960 Speaker 1: exciting being the last book to ever be sold in 714 00:42:57,000 --> 00:43:00,560 Speaker 1: this establishment? It is pretty exciting. They are tearing it 715 00:43:00,600 --> 00:43:04,040 Speaker 1: down right after this reading is over. So is that 716 00:43:04,120 --> 00:43:07,920 Speaker 1: the reason the books? Yeah? I figured, you know, it's 717 00:43:07,920 --> 00:43:10,719 Speaker 1: the last chance to make anything. So I'm gonna sell 718 00:43:10,719 --> 00:43:13,400 Speaker 1: that and move on. Are you already at work on 719 00:43:13,440 --> 00:43:16,400 Speaker 1: your next book? I am? I am? I tell us 720 00:43:16,440 --> 00:43:18,719 Speaker 1: about it. Well, it's a it's a book this time 721 00:43:18,719 --> 00:43:22,000 Speaker 1: where breaking breaking hold on. You're not reading anymore, you're 722 00:43:22,000 --> 00:43:24,239 Speaker 1: just answering questions. You can do this outside, all right, 723 00:43:24,840 --> 00:43:27,200 Speaker 1: I was breaking up. Get everyone out, Let's get everyone out. 724 00:43:27,200 --> 00:43:30,759 Speaker 1: Come on, let's moving on, let's go. It's talking about 725 00:43:30,800 --> 00:43:37,440 Speaker 1: Dracula going to Vegas. See you guys next time. In 726 00:43:37,440 --> 00:43:42,920 Speaker 1: the world where Dracula goes to Vegas this summer in 727 00:43:43,360 --> 00:43:49,320 Speaker 1: three theaters and online for Dawn demand. Bruce, it's me, 728 00:43:49,440 --> 00:43:52,880 Speaker 1: You're sorry, can do a different reading. Know what I 729 00:43:52,880 --> 00:43:55,479 Speaker 1: need is I just want you to connect to what's 730 00:43:55,520 --> 00:43:58,960 Speaker 1: on the script. You know what I'm connect connect? Yes, 731 00:43:59,640 --> 00:44:02,080 Speaker 1: So don't be follow that piece of paper up? Eat it, 732 00:44:02,840 --> 00:44:08,400 Speaker 1: keep it, let it get inside you metaphorically speaking, got it? No? No, no, no, Bruce, 733 00:44:08,440 --> 00:44:10,920 Speaker 1: I mean I eat that up? Eat it? He didn't 734 00:44:11,000 --> 00:44:13,280 Speaker 1: eat it? Sorry? Sorry, you want me to eat the 735 00:44:14,320 --> 00:44:17,200 Speaker 1: I mean I understand what you're saying, but the idea, Yeah, 736 00:44:17,200 --> 00:44:23,840 Speaker 1: so let me try it again. M hmm. What's that? Bruce? 737 00:44:23,960 --> 00:44:25,960 Speaker 1: Do you want something with the paper? Do you want 738 00:44:25,960 --> 00:44:28,200 Speaker 1: anything that with? You? Just want to draw? You? Tell me? 739 00:44:29,320 --> 00:44:32,680 Speaker 1: I'd like to try one without eating the paper first. Okay, 740 00:44:32,680 --> 00:44:37,560 Speaker 1: all right, well let's see. You know, I gotta be honest. 741 00:44:38,760 --> 00:44:41,840 Speaker 1: I need some guidance, yes, some direction please, But the 742 00:44:42,000 --> 00:44:47,520 Speaker 1: judgmental ship in your tone it's not helpful. Okay. And 743 00:44:47,600 --> 00:44:50,880 Speaker 1: the Wolfman nailed the voice over, and he was hired 744 00:44:50,880 --> 00:44:53,600 Speaker 1: for several of the things. Thank you, Borders crowd. Do 745 00:44:53,600 --> 00:44:57,440 Speaker 1: you have any questions, I've happy to take them now. Yeah, 746 00:44:57,800 --> 00:45:00,640 Speaker 1: I'll have to take to write this one thirt three minutes. 747 00:45:01,280 --> 00:45:06,480 Speaker 1: Whoa how did you rebuild the Bonds and Noble so quick? Well, 748 00:45:06,560 --> 00:45:09,920 Speaker 1: you know it's uh, they were already empty. This this 749 00:45:10,120 --> 00:45:12,239 Speaker 1: obviously it's not rightly shaped. This used to be an 750 00:45:12,239 --> 00:45:15,560 Speaker 1: eye hop. So the ceiling is weird. But right while 751 00:45:15,560 --> 00:45:18,680 Speaker 1: sitting on the camp yep? Is there any other questions 752 00:45:19,200 --> 00:45:31,719 Speaker 1: else where? Where's the border grill? There's it's downtown. Um, 753 00:45:32,000 --> 00:45:35,880 Speaker 1: it's full. I think it's that. Google will tell you 754 00:45:36,440 --> 00:45:41,480 Speaker 1: I'm not a search engine. But thank you ask a question? 755 00:45:41,560 --> 00:45:44,800 Speaker 1: Man said, one least there was one person here who 756 00:45:45,239 --> 00:45:50,239 Speaker 1: says he's your dad. Um, he wants to ask you 757 00:45:50,280 --> 00:45:58,840 Speaker 1: a question? Really, damn this fucking heavy man Son. It's me. 758 00:46:00,400 --> 00:46:04,480 Speaker 1: I know I've been accident pro my whole life. But sir, 759 00:46:04,640 --> 00:46:12,400 Speaker 1: sir as your father. Right here? Where's the border grill? 760 00:46:16,000 --> 00:46:21,960 Speaker 1: And that's our show for today? James, oh man Man, 761 00:46:22,960 --> 00:46:25,160 Speaker 1: I want to do a shout out to whoever wrote 762 00:46:25,200 --> 00:46:28,480 Speaker 1: into the uh your name here at alcumus dot com 763 00:46:28,520 --> 00:46:32,200 Speaker 1: and they're scene suggestion was Chris and James teaching a 764 00:46:32,320 --> 00:46:35,200 Speaker 1: class on accents. I want to say to the person 765 00:46:35,200 --> 00:46:39,359 Speaker 1: who wrote that email, who fuck yourself? Thank you, thank you, yeah, 766 00:46:39,719 --> 00:46:43,400 Speaker 1: I got your backs. Um, let's thank all of our alchemists, 767 00:46:43,400 --> 00:46:50,400 Speaker 1: starting with uh Battlestar Galactica, Joey Greer, thanks so much 768 00:46:50,440 --> 00:46:54,800 Speaker 1: for being mostly here. Joe, You're so welcome. You're so welcome. People. 769 00:46:54,880 --> 00:46:57,840 Speaker 1: Check out the Bear Supply on the West Side Comedy 770 00:46:57,920 --> 00:47:02,120 Speaker 1: dot com doing live shows is every Wednesday. Every Wednesday 771 00:47:02,160 --> 00:47:06,360 Speaker 1: streaming live on the Twitch and then later available on 772 00:47:06,400 --> 00:47:11,560 Speaker 1: the West Side Comedy on YouTube and actually on James's YouTube, 773 00:47:11,600 --> 00:47:15,480 Speaker 1: the real James Cene, the real James and very nicely 774 00:47:15,560 --> 00:47:18,760 Speaker 1: to James Ceni. Is this true, James? Uh? Yeah, Actually, 775 00:47:18,840 --> 00:47:20,719 Speaker 1: we do have a Bear Supply channel, and I've been 776 00:47:20,760 --> 00:47:23,759 Speaker 1: putting the newer shows on that one old shows of 777 00:47:23,800 --> 00:47:27,040 Speaker 1: Bear Supplier on my personal channel, and I'll tell you 778 00:47:27,440 --> 00:47:30,800 Speaker 1: just just I mean, it's been an outpouring of support 779 00:47:30,960 --> 00:47:35,319 Speaker 1: on our reviews. Uh. We got one from FCB so 780 00:47:35,400 --> 00:47:39,760 Speaker 1: much uh verified v I P Alchemist or alchem Aniac. 781 00:47:39,880 --> 00:47:41,719 Speaker 1: I love this show so much, I pay for it. 782 00:47:42,280 --> 00:47:46,759 Speaker 1: Uh from Tony Layton via Apple Podcast. I shouldn't be 783 00:47:46,800 --> 00:47:49,120 Speaker 1: just rushing reading this, but there's just been so many 784 00:47:49,200 --> 00:47:54,359 Speaker 1: from Whales Shark thirty three, Constantina, uh McCoy, Kent Well 785 00:47:55,280 --> 00:47:56,799 Speaker 1: I just want to say thank you because we've been 786 00:47:56,840 --> 00:47:59,200 Speaker 1: asking for reviews and good lord have they poured in. 787 00:47:59,280 --> 00:48:01,960 Speaker 1: And it's helpful because it's also putting us up on 788 00:48:02,000 --> 00:48:05,399 Speaker 1: the charts. Thank you for for that, James, and thanks 789 00:48:05,440 --> 00:48:09,200 Speaker 1: everyone writing in. McCoy Uh can't well just became a 790 00:48:09,239 --> 00:48:11,320 Speaker 1: patron v I P member. So everyone's pitching in and 791 00:48:11,400 --> 00:48:14,400 Speaker 1: we appreciate that. We will not stop. The Internet is 792 00:48:14,440 --> 00:48:17,520 Speaker 1: trying to stop us from our own personal connections to 793 00:48:17,560 --> 00:48:20,520 Speaker 1: each other, but we will continue to push through and 794 00:48:20,960 --> 00:48:23,359 Speaker 1: work through this. Cool Strottan, thanks so much for being here. 795 00:48:23,960 --> 00:48:28,479 Speaker 1: Uh still available. Some new content on the sketch Fest Yeah, 796 00:48:28,480 --> 00:48:31,600 Speaker 1: if you sketch fest dot com, slash watch, they're all 797 00:48:31,680 --> 00:48:34,160 Speaker 1: up there. They're not just two n nine so we're 798 00:48:34,160 --> 00:48:36,720 Speaker 1: hoping to move some more. They're all great, like unique 799 00:48:36,719 --> 00:48:41,520 Speaker 1: programming from the festival. UM also west Side related, Pretty 800 00:48:41,520 --> 00:48:43,239 Speaker 1: Pretty Pony is doing a show. I don't know if 801 00:48:43,239 --> 00:48:44,840 Speaker 1: this will be out by them, maybe maybe not in 802 00:48:44,920 --> 00:48:48,160 Speaker 1: July sevente and Rob Paulson is our guest anologist, which 803 00:48:48,160 --> 00:48:49,560 Speaker 1: will be great, and we're going to continue to do 804 00:48:49,640 --> 00:48:51,880 Speaker 1: those once a month as well, so check out their schedule. 805 00:48:52,320 --> 00:48:54,760 Speaker 1: That'll be phenomenal. Chris Alvarado. Thank you so much, buddy, 806 00:48:55,239 --> 00:48:58,160 Speaker 1: Thank you. You can find all my stuff at the 807 00:48:58,239 --> 00:49:04,680 Speaker 1: Real James. You're teaching some classes for West Side, Yeah 808 00:49:04,800 --> 00:49:07,200 Speaker 1: you still do, Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm teaching some classes 809 00:49:07,280 --> 00:49:09,120 Speaker 1: the Western Common Theater. I think, I think Joey is 810 00:49:09,160 --> 00:49:12,879 Speaker 1: as well. Maybe other people here. Yeah, I mean, let's 811 00:49:12,880 --> 00:49:15,439 Speaker 1: be honest. Western Comment Theater as a as a hub 812 00:49:15,480 --> 00:49:18,200 Speaker 1: for a lot of Alchemy This players, so please always 813 00:49:18,239 --> 00:49:21,359 Speaker 1: check out shows and classes and stuff, and you'll see 814 00:49:21,360 --> 00:49:24,759 Speaker 1: our names there for sure. Right on, let's thank your 815 00:49:24,760 --> 00:49:31,320 Speaker 1: engineer to the stars, Mr Doug Baine, also our producer. Uh, 816 00:49:31,719 --> 00:49:34,160 Speaker 1: be careful and healthy out there, folks, look out for 817 00:49:34,200 --> 00:49:38,080 Speaker 1: each other. I think we're all doing our best, and 818 00:49:38,200 --> 00:49:40,520 Speaker 1: I again want to thank everyone for tuning in and 819 00:49:40,560 --> 00:49:43,400 Speaker 1: writing to us. Your name here at Alchemy This dot com. 820 00:49:43,440 --> 00:50:16,280 Speaker 1: I'm your host, Kevin Pollock. Until next time, the Paper