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Speaker 1: Welcome to my show, Money Making Conversation Masterclass. I'm your

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Speaker 1: host with Sean McDonald. I recognize that we all have

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Speaker 1: different definitions of success. For you, it may be the

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Speaker 1: size of your paycheck. Mine is inspiring people to develop

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Speaker 1: a plan to reach their dreams. It's time to stop

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Speaker 1: reading other people's success stories and start writing your own.

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Speaker 1: You can only exceed expectations by believing in yourself. People

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Speaker 1: always like to talk about their gift for purpose. If

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Speaker 1: you have a gift, lead with your gifts and don't

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Speaker 1: let your friends, family, or coworkers stop you from planning

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Speaker 1: or living your dreams. My guest is Shelly fan Fan

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Speaker 1: Its fan Fan is the Florida State licensed Mental health Counselor.

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Speaker 1: She is currently the chief executive officer of Harmony Mental

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Speaker 1: Health and Behavioral Services for Children, adolescents and adults. Shelly

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Speaker 1: is also the founder and sole owner of as Shelly Consultant, llc. Or.

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Speaker 1: She consults with individual businesses, ministries, and organizations to maximize

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Speaker 1: performance and productivity. Shelly's passion is to change the world,

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Speaker 1: one life, one family, in one community at a time.

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Speaker 1: Please work with the Money Making Conversation Master Class. Shelly

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Speaker 1: fan Fan how you doing. I am well, hello, thank

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Speaker 1: you for having me? Well you seem bright? Chipper is

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Speaker 1: that it's a standard m for your personality? Absolutely, I

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Speaker 1: got up this morning. I still have purpose. Uh, impact

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Speaker 1: is my my my currency. So yes, there's so much

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Speaker 1: more to smile about than there is to frown about.

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Speaker 1: But you know, but you always get these people go,

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Speaker 1: why are you so happy? Well, you know they want

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Speaker 1: to bring you down, you know they want they feel

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Speaker 1: there's a reason or dysfunctional role in your life to

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Speaker 1: have this level of enthusiasm that I say that not

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Speaker 1: even joking, because they have people like that. How do

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Speaker 1: you how do you deal with people who who have

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Speaker 1: that negative built in energy that they want to just

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Speaker 1: spread instead of absorbing positivity. I try to be as

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Speaker 1: positive as possible and make sure that I do that consistently.

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Speaker 1: Because being for filled and being in purpose and finding

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Speaker 1: a reason to smile is no longer a normal thing.

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Speaker 1: It's quite abnormal. So when people respond to that, it's

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Speaker 1: because they are expecting you to be defeated. They're expecting

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Speaker 1: you to be discouraged, They're expected you to be at

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Speaker 1: your wits end, And so it's not uncommon for people

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Speaker 1: to ask me like, why are you smiling so big?

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Speaker 1: But the reason why my mantra is lived in your

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Speaker 1: smile is because I went through that stage in my

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Speaker 1: life where I'm you know, you know, I spread the

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Speaker 1: misery because I was so miserable on the inside, and

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Speaker 1: so I am very intentional about spreading positivity. And when

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Speaker 1: I deal with people or when I come to across

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Speaker 1: across people who have that attitude, I just basically confunct

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Speaker 1: them and encourage them to fix their focus, and um,

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Speaker 1: I try my best to give them a different perspective

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Speaker 1: and let them know that there's so much more working

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Speaker 1: for us then there is working against us when you

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Speaker 1: speak of that different perspective, because if it's based on

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Speaker 1: who you meet, there's no cookie cutter game plan you

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Speaker 1: can give to everybody. Otherwise you're not really servicing them

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Speaker 1: correctly and also hearing their issues. You know, now, your

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Speaker 1: name is that I introduced you with Shelley fan Fan

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Speaker 1: was that born and raised name? It is? Okay? Cool?

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Speaker 1: So you know, we go through life and you know,

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Speaker 1: I remember when middle school at times I was bullied, okay,

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Speaker 1: and you have a name, your name as a little

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Speaker 1: oddity to a fan fan, So will you tease and

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Speaker 1: when you would tease, did they lead to any bullying

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Speaker 1: incidents that you can remember that you have to overcome

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Speaker 1: or share with your parents or the teachers to to

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Speaker 1: you know, keep you focused and enjoy going to school.

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Speaker 1: I'm happy that you bring that up such a good

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Speaker 1: question because I love my name. Now it works so

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Speaker 1: well with campaigns because people are like, I'm a fan

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Speaker 1: of fan Fan. I'm like, yeah, keep that energy going.

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Speaker 1: But let me tell you, I never It took a

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Speaker 1: long time for me to really race that name because

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Speaker 1: I was bullied. Fan Fan is a very uncommon name.

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Speaker 1: Is actually of Haitian descent. It's pronounced Fafa, but of

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Speaker 1: course you know in our English language it is pronounced

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Speaker 1: fan fan. That's what people get, that's how they are

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Speaker 1: able to pronounce it. And so in school, I was

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Speaker 1: bullied for having a very strange last name. I was

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Speaker 1: bullied for being so skinny. I was bullied for being Haitian,

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Speaker 1: all the things that make me me, and so it

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Speaker 1: really impacted my capacity to self accept Now. You know,

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Speaker 1: I know that I would when I look back in

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Speaker 1: my life, I kind of went with the flow. You know,

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Speaker 1: when I say that is that the things that people

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Speaker 1: tease me about, I stopped doing it so I could

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Speaker 1: fit in, you know, like they like my teacher used

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Speaker 1: to always ask me to read publicly, you know, and

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Speaker 1: in the classroom. And one I remember a couple of

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Speaker 1: students they were very, very upset that I was always

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Speaker 1: chosen to read. And that really hit me when I

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Speaker 1: look back on it, and not not just started, you know,

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Speaker 1: just started breaking up my words and saying aid instead

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Speaker 1: of isn't so I can stop being the special student

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Speaker 1: and so and so. I understand that because of the

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Speaker 1: fact that when you start talking about mental health, people

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Speaker 1: need to understand it doesn't start in high school. It

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Speaker 1: just start as an adult. Sometimes you can go all

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Speaker 1: the way back to you know, uh, preschool, how the

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Speaker 1: adults allowed certain situations, the crying baby or the kid

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Speaker 1: in the corner by itself, or the way the kids dressed,

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Speaker 1: and because kids started a blank slate. So let's start

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Speaker 1: at the at the at that age level that you

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Speaker 1: start counseling and and and treating, so we can then

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Speaker 1: we move up to adolescents, then teens, then adults, and

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Speaker 1: adults are a whole new story. But sometimes if you

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Speaker 1: don't get your adulthood with the proper guidance, then your

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Speaker 1: disaster correct. Well, I'd like to take it back one

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Speaker 1: more stage, and that's in vitro. And it's important for

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Speaker 1: people to understand that mental health starts when you are

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Speaker 1: in the womb of your mom. Because in your womb,

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Speaker 1: in the womb of a woman, a child is developing.

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Speaker 1: The brain is developing, there is a soul, they have

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Speaker 1: the sense of hearing. I could go on and on

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Speaker 1: about the fetus inside of a woman's womb. And a

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Speaker 1: lot of the times when I'm dealing with individuals who

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Speaker 1: are trying to overcome trauma, their trauma dates back all

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Speaker 1: the way to when they were in their mother's womb.

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Speaker 1: And it could be because the mother was a victim

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Speaker 1: of violence herself, or the mother was a drug abuser.

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Speaker 1: I could go on and on, and so it's important

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Speaker 1: to understand that our mental health lifeline actually starts when

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Speaker 1: we were in the womb of our mother's The way

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Speaker 1: that our mothers cared for them for herself, her mental health,

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Speaker 1: how well she attended to her health needs while she

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Speaker 1: was pregnant with you, has to do and it is

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Speaker 1: included in the mental health lifeline. When we're working with

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Speaker 1: preschool children or kindergarteners, those young because I treat from

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Speaker 1: the ages of two to it's important to understand that

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Speaker 1: there's so much um of there's so much involved in

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Speaker 1: a child's development of self identity that incorporates their peer interactions.

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Speaker 1: And so when we as parents and caregivers minimize when

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Speaker 1: they come to us and say such and such was

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Speaker 1: talking about meet all the things that we find trivial,

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Speaker 1: it's very huge to a child, and so it's important

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Speaker 1: to understand that those things create impressions. Everything creates impressions.

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Speaker 1: Our brain is a huge recorder. Even those memories that

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Speaker 1: we don't have access to have power. And so as

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Speaker 1: we developed through those developmental stages and we are trying

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Speaker 1: to find ourselves, it's important to understand that all of

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Speaker 1: those experiences matter. They are impressions, and what we impress

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Speaker 1: we will express. What we impress is what we express.

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Speaker 1: So a lot of times when I'm working with adults,

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Speaker 1: it's important for me to kind of go back to

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Speaker 1: those learned experiences that cause those impressions and try to

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Speaker 1: unlearn them so that they can find some freedom and

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Speaker 1: the opportunity to relearn healthy connections and healthy ideas. We'll

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Speaker 1: be right back with more Money Making Conversations Masterclass with

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Speaker 1: Rushan McDonald. Now, let's return to Money Making Conversations Masterclass

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Speaker 1: with Rashan McDonald. Absolutely. Now as I'm talking to doctor,

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Speaker 1: excuse me, I'm talking to Shelley fan Fan. She is

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Speaker 1: a license important, licensed mental health counselor and our reason like,

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Speaker 1: I've been interviewed a lot of African Americans, people of

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Speaker 1: color about mental health because in the community of black

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Speaker 1: and brown we kind of shy way, you know, because

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Speaker 1: just using street terms, I don't want to think I'm crazy,

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Speaker 1: you know, I don't think you know, you know, people

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Speaker 1: still use the word retarded and associated with you know, craziness,

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Speaker 1: and you know, these are terminologies within our community that

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Speaker 1: we have not wrapped our conversation around, and that that

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Speaker 1: doesn't allow us to move forward. You know, we call

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Speaker 1: our kids slow. You know, it's still humor tied to

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Speaker 1: a child not functioning properly. That child may be discarded

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Speaker 1: into the back of the house or or to a

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Speaker 1: different conversation, or may not be included in part of

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Speaker 1: the family conversation because of embarrassment. How do you deal

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Speaker 1: with those because, like I said, we started to move

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Speaker 1: forward now, because it's called participation, it's called inclusive awareness

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Speaker 1: of a child, um intelligence, a child's social adaptbility, adaptability,

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Speaker 1: and things like that. Talk to us well, it starts

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Speaker 1: with education because our breakthrough is often on the other

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Speaker 1: side of something we do not know. And so this

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Speaker 1: idea of crazy. Usually when people say crazy, I asked them,

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Speaker 1: what does that look like for you? And so most

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Speaker 1: people will define like a person. Think of a man

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Speaker 1: at a seven eleven who's talking to himself, you know,

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Speaker 1: wiggling his fingers and responding to internal stimuli. Most of

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Speaker 1: the time people see that as mental illness. When they

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Speaker 1: think of the word mental health, they automatically think mental illness,

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Speaker 1: the person who has schizophrenia, the person who has bipolar

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Speaker 1: who's blowing up things, burning things, and having anger outbursts.

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Speaker 1: And what I try to teach every opportunity that I have,

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Speaker 1: especially to black and brown communities, is that mental health

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Speaker 1: is a spectrum. It starts with being completely whole and

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Speaker 1: emotionally well, and most of us do not fit into

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Speaker 1: that category all the way to having a diagnosable mental

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Speaker 1: health disorder. So what I try to teach is, what

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Speaker 1: does it look like outside of that space, outside of

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Speaker 1: the area that criteria from mental illness, What does the

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Speaker 1: rest of that spectrum look like? The rest of that

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Speaker 1: spectrum looks like your inability to commit to another person.

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Speaker 1: It looks like your inability to get eight hours of

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Speaker 1: uninterrupted rests. It looks like your self doubt. It looks

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Speaker 1: like your fear and anxiety that keeps you stuck. It

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Speaker 1: looks like your procrastination. It looks like that book that

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Speaker 1: you haven't written. It looks like that song that you

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Speaker 1: haven't sung. It looks like your inability to overcome your

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Speaker 1: emotional issues. It's your inability to to communicate effectively without

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Speaker 1: allowing your emotions to drive the car. It's your incapacity

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Speaker 1: to manage your anger and be successful at work. It's

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Speaker 1: your inability to manage your finances effectively. When we look

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Speaker 1: at it that way, it changes our mind about what

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Speaker 1: mental health really looks like, and then it expands the

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Speaker 1: need in our communities for help. Right, Well, you know

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Speaker 1: the thing about it is that you have an inner city,

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Speaker 1: then you have which is which which is totally a lockdown,

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Speaker 1: and well, you know, there's a lot of work has

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Speaker 1: to be done. You're talking about the wealth gap, that's

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Speaker 1: a mental gap too. That's we're definitely in the mind

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Speaker 1: of city. But it's all about embarrassing how people feel

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Speaker 1: the statue or the place they want to be recognized

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Speaker 1: us within the community. And it starts with your children.

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Speaker 1: And your children are your future. And so you know,

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Speaker 1: we bring these innocent taughts or innocent people into our lives.

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Speaker 1: And I always tell people to have a healthy child

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Speaker 1: and that maybe define what you might call healthy into

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Speaker 1: a life is a miracle. And in the process of

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Speaker 1: the adults, this is the whole thing. You have an adult,

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Speaker 1: you have the child, and then and the child may

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Speaker 1: not be living up to the physical and mental expectations

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Speaker 1: of their parents. How do you deal with that? So

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Speaker 1: the love and the and the not lawering the standards,

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Speaker 1: but raising the love and being able to push that

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Speaker 1: child at that level to their maximum efforts. How do

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Speaker 1: you balance that because you're dealing with all three. You're

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Speaker 1: dealing with the ad lessons, you're dealing with the children,

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Speaker 1: and you're dealing with their adults. So in parenting, when

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Speaker 1: we are providing parenting training, one of the things one

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Speaker 1: of the main lessons that we teach is that the

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Speaker 1: love and affection, celebration of life, those things should not

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Speaker 1: be contingent upon expectations or what we define as good behavior.

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Speaker 1: It should never right. And so sometimes I'll have parents say,

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Speaker 1: or what, we canceled his birthday party because he was

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Speaker 1: blah blah blah blah right, he didn't listen, he got

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Speaker 1: in trouble. And so we have to help parents understand

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Speaker 1: what's healthy to have as contingencies because a lot of

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Speaker 1: parenting is very performance based. And then we grow up

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Speaker 1: as adults and we are over performers, we are perfectionists.

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Speaker 1: We're not living happy lives. And where does that come from?

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Speaker 1: That comes from performance based parenting? Where I love you

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Speaker 1: when I say when I believe you're doing good, when

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Speaker 1: the report cards all a's, when you got that trophy

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Speaker 1: at school. It is at that point that I give

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Speaker 1: you love a affection, or when you are not meeting

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Speaker 1: my expectations, I withhold my love and affection. It causes

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Speaker 1: children to understand that love depends on fill in the blank,

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Speaker 1: and that's a that's a problem for a lot of

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Speaker 1: marriages too. I always say when you say I love you,

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Speaker 1: because everything after the word because becomes a condition. And

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Speaker 1: so we have to actually teach parents how to unconditionally

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Speaker 1: love and accept their children. And half the time parents

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Speaker 1: who parent that way is because they were parented that way.

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Speaker 1: And so it's about going back and breaking those generational understanding,

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Speaker 1: those generational choices, those generational curses, in order to set

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Speaker 1: the children free. One of the things also in addition

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Speaker 1: to that teaching unconditional love in our parenting, we also

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Speaker 1: have to teach that there's no such thing as good

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Speaker 1: or bad parenting. It's either it's effective or ineffective. And

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Speaker 1: when we are not raising children that are emotionally intelligent

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Speaker 1: and mentally stable, there is some ineffectivity in the way

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Speaker 1: that a person parents. And then it gives us an

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Speaker 1: opportunity to teach parents new skills. New skills are really

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Speaker 1: to keep. It's when they seen them. With a series

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Speaker 1: of questions for me to include in my interview with you,

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Speaker 1: I'm speaking with Shelly fan Fan She's a licensed in

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Speaker 1: the state of Florida mental health counselor. She also has

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Speaker 1: another organization called as Shelley Consultant, LLC, where she consults

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Speaker 1: with individuals, businesses, ministries, and organization, the maxismized performance and productivity.

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Speaker 1: That's how we talked about that productivity, especially coming out

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Speaker 1: of the COVID experience, but also came out of the

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Speaker 1: COVID experience was two words that I heard a lot,

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Speaker 1: conflict resolution, and I heard it a lot in law enforcement.

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Speaker 1: Confluence of course, you know, I Conflquence happens and everything

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Speaker 1: happens in children, happens in relationships, happens in the two

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Speaker 1: adults trying to get into the same door going into

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Speaker 1: a seven eleven. So when you need to work conflict resolution,

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Speaker 1: I'm sure that's been a prominent part of your conversations.

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Speaker 1: How what exactly does that mean? Conflict resolution? Well, it

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Speaker 1: means that it's it's basically a process by which we

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Speaker 1: manage un met expectations. Because when you think about conflict,

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Speaker 1: conflict is a problem. It's a nice word for problems.

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Speaker 1: Problems are always rooted in an expectation that wasn't meant.

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Speaker 1: Think of a problem right now, Think of problems that

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Speaker 1: you dealt with. It always goes back to a an

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Speaker 1: expectation that you had of someone something, an outcome that

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Speaker 1: you were expecting, and the expectation wasn't met. And so

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Speaker 1: conflict resolution teaches skill sets on how to manage that distress.

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Speaker 1: If that conflict is with another person, Conflict resolution teaches

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Speaker 1: how to have those courageous conversations and be solution focused

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Speaker 1: in it. How do you manage your emotion? Is that disappointment,

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Speaker 1: that anger, that frustration? How do you manage that in

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Speaker 1: order to get to a resolution with someone that you

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Speaker 1: want to preserve a relationship with. Sometimes the resolution is deuces,

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Speaker 1: and that's okay too, But conflict resolution is about that.

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Speaker 1: And one of the things that I teach as a

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Speaker 1: corporate trainer is a lot of the time when we

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Speaker 1: say conflict resolution, what we're trying to say is conflict management.

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Speaker 1: Why because we may not always resolve our conflict the

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Speaker 1: resolution maybe that we're just gonna agree to disagree. Is

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Speaker 1: that a resolve? Well maybe not, But it's a way

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Speaker 1: that we're managing conflict so that we can still be effective.

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Speaker 1: We can still be partners, we could still be married,

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Speaker 1: we could still be co parents, we could still you know,

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Speaker 1: be effective and work towards the go. Conflict management is

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Speaker 1: always the key. We'll be right back with more money

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Speaker 1: Making Conversations Masterclass with Rushan McDonald. Now let's return to

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Speaker 1: Money Making Conversations Masterclass with Rushan McDonald. Conflict management can

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Speaker 1: be sectioned off. You know, when you're when you're in

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Speaker 1: a police officer, that's a separate conflict management. When you

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Speaker 1: go in for mediation with parenting, that's a separate conflict management,

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Speaker 1: real solution discussion. And well as in a girlfriend or

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Speaker 1: a partner relationship or husband and wife relationship, because there's

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Speaker 1: certain contractual agreements that you have when you get married.

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Speaker 1: A lot of people don't realize you've signed a contract,

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Speaker 1: you know, where when you're just a partner, a girlfriend, boyfriend,

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Speaker 1: you can go do somehout, you know, depending on if

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Speaker 1: you've moved in with that person, then that's a different duce.

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Speaker 1: There's a certain mediation that's the conflict can get kind

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Speaker 1: of kind of dicey. But and and and talking to

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Speaker 1: you in mental health and and you know, it all

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Speaker 1: goes back to stress. It always goes back to am

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Speaker 1: I living up to my personal standards? Then then if

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Speaker 1: you're not living up your personal standards, are you're living

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Speaker 1: up to your kids? That are you living up to

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Speaker 1: your job standards? So you can just put all this

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Speaker 1: way on your back and like the little image of

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Speaker 1: that guy holding up the world Atlas holding you can

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Speaker 1: feel like that person and guess what, it may never

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Speaker 1: come off of you unless you learn how to handle stress. Now,

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Speaker 1: I've always felt that, you know, stressed. For me, I

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Speaker 1: handled a lot of different ways. Uh, even when I

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Speaker 1: when I bought a house in Atlanta, I made sure

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Speaker 1: I had water near me. So I go near water.

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Speaker 1: I just watched that calmness of the water, and it's

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Speaker 1: just just seeing it. It just really brings me down.

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Speaker 1: And so because I'm not a cigar cigar smoker, I

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Speaker 1: don't drink wine, so everything's always one on me. And

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Speaker 1: so how I deal with that. I love to bake.

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Speaker 1: I love to cook, you know, because it's a short

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Speaker 1: term window and I can see success. Sometimes stress is

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Speaker 1: tied to goals. So and then in my office, I

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Speaker 1: have a garden, and so I have this forty five

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Speaker 1: day window where I can see tomatoes, I can see okraw,

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Speaker 1: I can see colar greens. And so that's how ideal

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Speaker 1: was stress. And as I'm just giving those examples of

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Speaker 1: because there's so many different ways, but I tid I

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Speaker 1: tend to tie short time, which short term windows too

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Speaker 1: to be able, especially if you're goal order in person

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Speaker 1: like me, and you have these long committed plans where

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Speaker 1: you are it's a month of whale, is a year way,

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Speaker 1: or you're not even reaching your goals. Well, I can

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Speaker 1: go out to my guard and I can put me

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Speaker 1: some chairry tomatoes and I'm happy. So when you say

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Speaker 1: stress management, am I in the right direction, Shelley? You

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Speaker 1: are absolutely you hit the veil on the head. Stress

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Speaker 1: management is about under first and foremost understanding the importance

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Speaker 1: of having practical wellness tools. Okay, what you just talked

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Speaker 1: about our wellness tools. I garden. I make sure that

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Speaker 1: I am living by the water, and you know I

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Speaker 1: have these. I give myself an opportunity to achieve success.

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Speaker 1: That's what that is like. I want to be able

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Speaker 1: to see the tomatoes grow that success. These are wellness tools,

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Speaker 1: and unfortunately many people don't have many. They may have

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Speaker 1: one or two tools that they use. So if my

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Speaker 1: tool is a glass of wine and sleep, that I'm

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Speaker 1: not dealing with my stress because the tools that I'm

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Speaker 1: using are very avoidant. And so we teach how to

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Speaker 1: classify your stressors into two main categories. What stressors are

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Speaker 1: avoidable and what stressors are unavoidable? Because the ones that

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Speaker 1: are avoidable that we need to be strategic about avoiding

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Speaker 1: them in a healthy way, because escape avoidance sometimes becomes

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Speaker 1: very unhealthy. You're not really living life because you're just

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Speaker 1: living in escape avoidance, just running from those stressors. So

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Speaker 1: in a healthy way, how do we avoid those avoidable stressors?

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Speaker 1: And how do we manage our stress in those unavoidable stressors?

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Speaker 1: And I am telling you in the twenty four years

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Speaker 1: that I have been in practice, there are so many

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Speaker 1: people out there that do not know how to Here's

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Speaker 1: a word. Here's a word, and that is decompressed. Like decompressed.

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Speaker 1: What do you do to decompress? Because if you're trying

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Speaker 1: to manage your stress, but you don't have the capacity

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Speaker 1: to decompress, it's gonna be very difficult to manage the stress.

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Speaker 1: So of course we teach, you know, a good planning,

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Speaker 1: making sure that we teach harmony versus balance, teach make

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Speaker 1: sure that you are around people that are going to

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Speaker 1: pour life into your accountability partnership, set realistic goals. But

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Speaker 1: but deeper than that has to be the capacity to decompress.

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Speaker 1: That's your ability to take your anger from a ten

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Speaker 1: to a six, your anxiety from a seven two a three,

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Speaker 1: leaving your office and going at home and understanding you

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Speaker 1: have to change roles. Now your hats have to change.

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Speaker 1: There has to be an exchange made either at your

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Speaker 1: front door or on your way home so that you're

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Speaker 1: not bringing that energy into your sanctuary. Decompression is key,

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Speaker 1: and there are people that don't know this. They have

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Speaker 1: to learn how, and that's why therapy is so effective. Again,

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Speaker 1: I'm speaking to Shelley fan Fan. I'm a fan of

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Speaker 1: fan Fan, Okay, and then she's State of Florida Mental

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Speaker 1: Health counselor and also she deals with what I'd like

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Speaker 1: to talk about the conversation. We don't have children have

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Speaker 1: mental health. They are not tied to the words that

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Speaker 1: we use because there's so many stress levels the kids

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Speaker 1: have to do. Because we have technology. You know, video

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Speaker 1: games create stress. Just what being able to have apps

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Speaker 1: create stress. The fact that your child and yourself are

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Speaker 1: tied to a phone, so they're they're prevoud conversations while

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Speaker 1: you're driving in a car. That was not privy when

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Speaker 1: I was growing up and we drove, we drove, we

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Speaker 1: got the car. Now you're in a phone. That child

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Speaker 1: may want that a kitchen, but you're given all that

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Speaker 1: attention to the person you're dealing on the phone. They

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Speaker 1: may hear your stress levels and they pick that up.

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Speaker 1: So I know that your world. Sometimes you're invite their

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Speaker 1: stress into your child's life because of technology. So I

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Speaker 1: want to close what you give me us. Some porters

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Speaker 1: own overcoming life obstacles. Absolutely, And are you talking about

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Speaker 1: in terms of children? Because you hit something, you hit,

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Speaker 1: you hit the nail on the head. When you talked

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Speaker 1: about children watching how their parents handle stress, how children

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Speaker 1: learn by watching their parents managing their stress, managing conflict

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Speaker 1: and things of that nature. And so a lot of

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Speaker 1: times when parents come in and they sign up for

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Speaker 1: therapy for their kids, do you know what we do?

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Speaker 1: We asked them to sign up themselves first, because our

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Speaker 1: children are sponges and it's very important that caregivers are

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Speaker 1: tapping into their own mental health so that they can

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Speaker 1: be better examples for their children. And that stress in childhood.

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Speaker 1: I'm so happy that you mentioned that because it's key

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Speaker 1: and all of this emphasis on gaming and winning and

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Speaker 1: likes and shares and all of that. One thing that

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Speaker 1: I want to say here and I could go on

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Speaker 1: and on about this, but I'm gonna keep it brief.

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Speaker 1: Parents have to encourage peer interactions. You can negotiate with

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Speaker 1: your kids. Four hours of peer interaction gets you one

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Speaker 1: hour of gaming. Like, we have to make sure that

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Speaker 1: our children are still connecting with their peers. That's so important.

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Speaker 1: That peer interaction is so important and alleviates a lot

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Speaker 1: of the internal distress that children deal with on a

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Speaker 1: day to day basis. And we have to make sure

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Speaker 1: that children have the opportunity to express themselves. This idea

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Speaker 1: that children should be seen and not heard, that's like

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Speaker 1: a thing of the past that is unhealthy. It causes

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Speaker 1: mental ill on this we have kids that are cutting themselves,

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Speaker 1: they are self mutilating. We have to allow children to

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Speaker 1: speak their minds and parents have to give them the

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Speaker 1: space to do that. Well. I want to thank you Chilling.

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Speaker 1: And like I said, I am based in Atlanta, Georgia.

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Speaker 1: I know you're licensed in Florida. You make trips to Georgia.

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Speaker 1: Please make time and come over. We can talk stress free.

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Speaker 1: You know, I can show you my garden. I can

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Speaker 1: make some sauce right in front of you with the

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Speaker 1: holler opinions. I freshly picked the onions, I freshly picked

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Speaker 1: the cilantro. I freshly picked in the hockey ChIL beef

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Speaker 1: steak tomatoes that we're gonna straight up and enjoy. Of course,

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Speaker 1: the chips are gonna be storeballed. I can't do everything,

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Speaker 1: get okay, but again, uh I, I appreciate your smiles,

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Speaker 1: appreciate you and the more important to honest conversation. That's

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Speaker 1: why a couple of bringing on money Making Conversations master class.

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Speaker 1: So no, you have a home here to be able

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Speaker 1: to afform them, to be able to communicate, and I

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Speaker 1: like to believe that the conversation I was able to

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Speaker 1: deliver you was one of honesty and one that you

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Speaker 1: was able to exp found on and deliver information for

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Speaker 1: my audience. Okay, absolutely, thank you for having me. If

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Speaker 1: you want to hear or see this interview on money

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Speaker 1: making conversations, go to money Making Conversation dot com. I'm

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Speaker 1: with Sean McDonald. I am your host