Speaker 1: Hell, I Suck at Dating with de Younglert and Dared
Speaker 1: Haven and I heard radio podcast. Hello everyone, welcome to
Speaker 1: help I Suck at Dating. Course. Dean and myself are here.
Speaker 1: We are joined by the beautiful Serena Pitt, who decided
Speaker 1: to put up with us for another episode, which we're
Speaker 1: very grateful for. And we have two very special guests
Speaker 1: who are currently on the line right now from the
Speaker 1: brand new Netflix series The Ultimatum, Mary or move On,
Speaker 1: We have Randall Griffin and Jake Cunningham. Gentlemen, how you
Speaker 1: doing today? Do? Pretty good? Man? Pretty good? Pretty good?
Speaker 1: So obviously this show is gonna be huge. The Ultimatum. Uh,
Speaker 1: it's a crazy, crazy premise. It just premiered on Wednesday.
Speaker 1: Uh so well here, let's let's hear from the horse's mouth,
Speaker 1: Jake and Randall. Jake, why don't you go first? Tell
Speaker 1: us a little bit about the show and why you
Speaker 1: got yourself involved in it. I mean it crazy, honestly.
Speaker 1: I didn't want to do it April. Uh. I did
Speaker 1: it for April. But it was crazy, man. A whole
Speaker 1: lot of emotions, a lot of everything was fast paced.
Speaker 1: Things were switching up left and right, and it was
Speaker 1: just there was a lot to deal with. But UM,
Speaker 1: I think everybody got what they needed out of it
Speaker 1: in the end. So yeah, so you guys, we guys
Speaker 1: feel used on the concept of the show. Yeah. So basically,
Speaker 1: the altimatum is the concept overall is just UM. Two Obviously,
Speaker 1: couples come onto the show UM. One obviously not willing
Speaker 1: to come like Jake said, but the other giving the
Speaker 1: person an altimatum because they're both at a crossroads. Either
Speaker 1: they've been dating too long or one person just thinks
Speaker 1: they're they're ready while the other person doesn't. UM. So
Speaker 1: the whole concept is crazy because throughout these six to
Speaker 1: eight weeks, three weeks will be living with a whole
Speaker 1: new person, somebody E've never met before. UM. And during
Speaker 1: that first week of us going throughout the front that
Speaker 1: we're dating so many people, trying to see who is
Speaker 1: the perfect match for us during this experience, UM, hoping
Speaker 1: to get the clarity that we need UM. And ultimately
Speaker 1: we have to decide if you want to stay with
Speaker 1: the person we came with, leave with the new person,
Speaker 1: or just go home alone. And it definitely is a
Speaker 1: super crazy accelerating process. I don't think Jake and I
Speaker 1: were ready for at all? How can you be so
Speaker 1: r do we know that Jake didn't want to go?
Speaker 1: Did you want to be there? Or how did you
Speaker 1: even get wrapped up in the show in the first place.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be honest, I had no idea that. I
Speaker 1: really don't even know the concept too much. I mean,
Speaker 1: obviously Chanique brought me on the ultimated she gave me
Speaker 1: the ultimatum and was just talking about, Hey, this can
Speaker 1: be a good opportunity for us to kind of strengthen
Speaker 1: our relationship, But I don't think she did too much
Speaker 1: research into what we were having to go through um
Speaker 1: in order to do that or you know, ultimately break up.
Speaker 1: So yeah, when I first got on, I was super
Speaker 1: skeptical and like just weird out, like how is this
Speaker 1: even possible? How is it even gonna work? So that
Speaker 1: was my question when I heard about the show, because
Speaker 1: I was just at a girls weekend and everyone was
Speaker 1: talking about the show and like the structure of it,
Speaker 1: and I haven't watched it, but my question was, like,
Speaker 1: when you guys went on this show and you found
Speaker 1: out like how it was all going to work out?
Speaker 1: How much of it was a surprise to you or
Speaker 1: did you get there and you're like, yeah, we knew
Speaker 1: exactly what we were signing up for. It was going
Speaker 1: to be x y z um Jay. How how much
Speaker 1: did you know? I mean I knew. I knew the basically,
Speaker 1: like the most most of the concept of it. UM
Speaker 1: didn't really know the ultimatum part. But I knew we
Speaker 1: would be like going in um dating these other women men,
Speaker 1: moving in with them for three weeks, and then moving
Speaker 1: back in with our X. So I was pretty comfortable
Speaker 1: um with doing it, but it was it was a
Speaker 1: shot when I got on there for sure. Yeah, random,
Speaker 1: I actually didn't know that I would be living with
Speaker 1: somebody for three weeks, so I don't know they gave
Speaker 1: us different information, But in my mind, I'm thinking, Okay,
Speaker 1: we're all going to date each other, and then um,
Speaker 1: I thought we were all living together. That's whine like
Speaker 1: one big happy family. We're all living together, and then
Speaker 1: we're just going to see like okay, like maybe I
Speaker 1: can kind of get these bits and pieces out of
Speaker 1: people to see, Okay, this is what I need to
Speaker 1: work on to be like this or you know, vice versus.
Speaker 1: So yeah, so when they dropped that ball with me,
Speaker 1: I was like, what so I didn't. Wait, So you
Speaker 1: don't all live in a house together? No, so we
Speaker 1: all live we all live in like the first week, um,
Speaker 1: we're dating, well, in the separate hotel rooms, everyone individually.
Speaker 1: And then after the week of dating, when the choice happens,
Speaker 1: then we move into apartments like separate apartments. So whoever
Speaker 1: I picked I lived with, um, whoever anyone else? And
Speaker 1: then after those three weeks you move back in with
Speaker 1: an apartment with the person who came in there with.
Speaker 1: Did they ever give you, guys a chance to like,
Speaker 1: after they kind of gave you the rundown on what
Speaker 1: was going to happen? Did they ever give you a
Speaker 1: chance to be like I don't want to do this,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go home. No, it's too late. Answer to
Speaker 1: that one. That's so crazy. Well, at least with our shows,
Speaker 1: we kind of have an idea before getting ourselves into
Speaker 1: with something like this. It seems like it's crazy you're
Speaker 1: put on the spot. Well, this sounds like, uh, you
Speaker 1: know for people who are non reality TV show that like,
Speaker 1: it sounds like taking a break. You know, you hear
Speaker 1: that a lot of relationships like, hey, let's take a break,
Speaker 1: let's see other people and see what it's like. But
Speaker 1: oftentimes that break that you take is not on national television.
Speaker 1: It's a lot a lot different when it's different. But
Speaker 1: I'm just trying to relate it to the listeners who
Speaker 1: are obviously not gonna be able to relate to beyond
Speaker 1: national television. But my point being is that without spoiling anything,
Speaker 1: because I know that the finale hasn't aired and there
Speaker 1: is a reunion right right, so via finale and the
Speaker 1: reunion are airing. Have you guys own the reunion that
Speaker 1: can you say that? Okay, so you have filmed the reunion,
Speaker 1: But my question to you is, without spoiling anything, do
Speaker 1: you think that this overall can strengthen the relationship? Don't?
Speaker 1: I don't want to know about the ultimatum. Want to
Speaker 1: know because a lot of people are saying, Hey, you know,
Speaker 1: I'm with someone. Do you think by us taking a
Speaker 1: break and coming back together that our relationship can strengthen
Speaker 1: from that? Do you think it can? I think it can.
Speaker 1: And I'm just speaking off of just my perspective right now, because, uh,
Speaker 1: I think you you learn more about yourself individually than
Speaker 1: you do, like just as a couple obviously, So I
Speaker 1: think coming back together, if you learn about yourself a
Speaker 1: lot and that person does as well, then it ultimately
Speaker 1: does make things a lot stronger hopefully better. So I
Speaker 1: think it can, but it also could go like, yeah,
Speaker 1: it could definitely go both ways because there's like no
Speaker 1: relationship came off the show happy, like those questions. Everything
Speaker 1: was those concerns with everyone, But the true test is
Speaker 1: who actually can get back together and end up in
Speaker 1: the long run. So it could go both ways. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: we talked about it a little bit earlier on the
Speaker 1: podcast before you guys got here that uh, sometimes it's
Speaker 1: it's not just love that can keep you in a relationship.
Speaker 1: So do you think that's uh like that kind of
Speaker 1: got put to the test with these relationships where do
Speaker 1: you guys love each other but it might not work
Speaker 1: like practically speaking or um, Like, what what were like
Speaker 1: the main issues that you guys were dealing with on
Speaker 1: the show, do you think? Yeah? I think there throughout
Speaker 1: filming we were always put through tests things to talk about,
Speaker 1: things that we might be insecure to talk about on
Speaker 1: a regular day, but obviously we kind of have to
Speaker 1: be more vulnerable. Um. But yeah, I think in some instances,
Speaker 1: you can love somebody so much but also realize that
Speaker 1: that might not be the person for you. And going
Speaker 1: on this show, we met so so many great people,
Speaker 1: great women on the show that we're like, you know,
Speaker 1: it makes you think like, wow, damn, could I see
Speaker 1: myself actually being with this person over this person that
Speaker 1: I came here with. It was crazy because you're sitting
Speaker 1: in your room just thinking like am I wrong for
Speaker 1: thinking this? And it was like a whole uh, I
Speaker 1: don't know if I can custom right now. I was
Speaker 1: gonna say mine, Okay, it was a mine because you
Speaker 1: just never you've never been through anything like this before,
Speaker 1: and the process was so accelerated that you really had
Speaker 1: to put yourself on the line and open up so
Speaker 1: much um to try to get the most out of
Speaker 1: the experience. I think the big thing too, was that
Speaker 1: we were living with somebody else and you weren't. You
Speaker 1: didn't know what was going on with the person you
Speaker 1: have been with for two years and not knowing that
Speaker 1: and and trying to figure out like how this is
Speaker 1: going versus how is that? It was just a big
Speaker 1: Like Randall said, money, that's all I can think about,
Speaker 1: especially you're just sitting there and all you can do
Speaker 1: is just think about every possible scenario. It really does
Speaker 1: mess with your head a lot. Jake, So you said
Speaker 1: you but you were in a relationship for two years
Speaker 1: before going on the show. Uh, did you guys talk
Speaker 1: about because I imagine the ultimatum comes down to marriage
Speaker 1: right in most cases? Well yeah, we found that out
Speaker 1: where he got on there. But yeah, yeah, so did
Speaker 1: you guys talk about marriage it all before? Within the
Speaker 1: two years before going on is I actually had um
Speaker 1: an engagement planned out. We were like a whole bunch
Speaker 1: of stuff, like I was up for kids and all
Speaker 1: that stuff. But um, obviously I'm not going to tell
Speaker 1: that there was an engagement plan. It's supposed to be surprised,
Speaker 1: so kind of just it was funny because we're supposed
Speaker 1: to go on a cruise for like two weeks. I
Speaker 1: was supposed to do it there, but it was during filming,
Speaker 1: so I was like, oh my god, I had to
Speaker 1: cancel the cruise, had to cancel everything, And oh no,
Speaker 1: it sounds like a big swingers club this show pretty much. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's what everyone asked me, Like, what do you think
Speaker 1: of the shiners, Like it's just a big swinger party,
Speaker 1: to be honest with you. Yeah, well, hopefully we don't
Speaker 1: see anything that's gets you guys in too much trouble.
Speaker 1: Has it been weird watching back the show since since
Speaker 1: filming it? Uh? Yeah, I watched We watched it right
Speaker 1: before the Moon Union. We got the only thing we
Speaker 1: haven't seen as a Moon union, so we'll see when
Speaker 1: everybody else does. But watching it back, I watched it
Speaker 1: that one time. I haven't watched it since it's I
Speaker 1: don't like seeing myself on a phone camera more or
Speaker 1: less on TV, so cringe e just seeing like so
Speaker 1: and then thinking about like, wow, my parents are watching
Speaker 1: this right now. Yeah, yeah, we can relate to that.
Speaker 1: I know Netflix, for whatever reason, they like to film
Speaker 1: their shows like two years before it airs. So when
Speaker 1: did this get filmed a year ago? Okay, so that's
Speaker 1: that's not so bad. We've talked to something like too
Speaker 1: Hot to Handle contestants that were like, yeah, we filmed
Speaker 1: in twenty seventeen and it's just getting near it now.
Speaker 1: Like I'm exaggerating obviously, but sometimes it's pretty bad. But yeah,
Speaker 1: I can imagine seeing yourself back on TV and then
Speaker 1: and then like hearing yourself talk and you're like, allow
Speaker 1: to really sound like that. And then my big thing
Speaker 1: when I was on the bachel Threat was I was
Speaker 1: like drinking a lot, and so I would like get
Speaker 1: wasted and I wouldn't remember what I did, and I
Speaker 1: had watched the show back and I'd be like, I
Speaker 1: said that. I can't believe I said that, Like I
Speaker 1: don't even remember saying that at all. Were you guys
Speaker 1: on the show before the drink limit? Oh? Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: we were pre drink limit. We were the reason to
Speaker 1: drink limit got instituted. Actually funny enough, and it shows
Speaker 1: you were there during the shutdown. Yeah. Yeah, And I'll
Speaker 1: tell you what those two seasons were. They were. They
Speaker 1: were absolutely brutal. Was there any Was there any moments
Speaker 1: you guys were like super embarrassed by or just like,
Speaker 1: let's so we didn't have a drink limit and when
Speaker 1: we moved in with our people, like you open the
Speaker 1: fridge expecting food and you see nothing but alcohol stuff,
Speaker 1: so in our eyes like oh bet, like we're about
Speaker 1: to get lit right now, but then realizing that like, oh,
Speaker 1: we're like doing this for the next three weeks. This
Speaker 1: is gonna be this is going to be testy a
Speaker 1: little bit. So I lost so much weight on that show.
Speaker 1: Just when we we came out Hartman all there was
Speaker 1: p throne, tequila, whiskey, beer, like everything you can think
Speaker 1: of every time, and ran low and we're off doing
Speaker 1: a scene somewhere, They're come in there and restop it
Speaker 1: and I'm just, oh, like, you really could be nice
Speaker 1: to open the fridge and see like a vegetable one.
Speaker 1: So so, how did you lose it just because there
Speaker 1: wasn't enough food for you to eat? Yeah? We just
Speaker 1: it was constantly filming drunk nine of the time and
Speaker 1: then not not all that anxiety, all that kind of stuff.
Speaker 1: That's how they get you to make those crazy decisions
Speaker 1: for the for the TV and the drama and all
Speaker 1: that kind of stuff. So so did this, like, did
Speaker 1: this whole experience change your vision? I mean, without spoiling anything,
Speaker 1: did it change your approach to relationships or how you
Speaker 1: feel about relationships at all? Yeah? I think for me,
Speaker 1: I feel like it made me way more vulnerable and
Speaker 1: open because I'm super closed off, especially when I meet somebody.
Speaker 1: And I think before prior to the show, I really
Speaker 1: didn't know how to express my emotions like that. I'm
Speaker 1: think I wasn't the best at that, but being around
Speaker 1: so many different people, like it's almost like it's forced
Speaker 1: out of you. And it's either you're gonna just shut
Speaker 1: down and not get with this experience as the offer,
Speaker 1: or you're gonna like just embrace it. And with me
Speaker 1: embracing gay just realized that, like, Wow, it wasn't that hard.
Speaker 1: You know. It's it's more mental than anything because you're
Speaker 1: coming in with somebody you love, um, but then you
Speaker 1: just think about, like, well, I can also like work
Speaker 1: on my character development as well. Yeah how about you Jake?
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, same. It's like because I never like wanted
Speaker 1: the fame, never wanted any of that, so I was
Speaker 1: like kind of reserved. I kind of kept to myself.
Speaker 1: I kept my circle close, um, But being on the show,
Speaker 1: I definitely opened up a lot more. Definitely. Uh, I
Speaker 1: felt better about my decisions and sort of and I
Speaker 1: kind of know what I want now from for future.
Speaker 1: That's good. That's good. So I got I got one
Speaker 1: question for you guys. Uh, well one more question, I guess,
Speaker 1: and to let Jared and Serena asks more. But I've
Speaker 1: got a girlfriend. We're not married, she wants to get married.
Speaker 1: Do you think it's wise of me to sit down
Speaker 1: with her and watch this show or should we just
Speaker 1: pretend like it doesn't exist, Like, is it gonna make
Speaker 1: her upset with me? Or will it make her like
Speaker 1: understand the situation a little bit better? I think it
Speaker 1: might help you out a little bit too, be honest.
Speaker 1: I mean it could go both ways. It could go
Speaker 1: both ways. I want to say it's not going to
Speaker 1: help you out, I think, But what I will say
Speaker 1: is I think once she sees all the drama in
Speaker 1: the fold and she'll realize like, Okay, maybe that wasn't
Speaker 1: a good idea, so yeah, is right, she'll be like, hey,
Speaker 1: I think we should see other people as you could
Speaker 1: go on and be like, and you could address all
Speaker 1: those problems that we're having on the show with her
Speaker 1: before y'all decided to make that. Yeah. Well, no, I
Speaker 1: agree with you, guys. I do think just being on
Speaker 1: a reality show in general, especially like a relationship show,
Speaker 1: does make you open up a lot more, makes you
Speaker 1: a lot more vulnerable, makes you like understand how to
Speaker 1: commune get your feelings a lot better, which uh for
Speaker 1: me personally. Before I went on I was so I
Speaker 1: still ain't really bad at it, let's be honest, but
Speaker 1: I was so so much worse before going on. And
Speaker 1: then when they sit you in those like interview rooms
Speaker 1: and they're like asking you all these questions like how
Speaker 1: do you feel? What do you think? How does that
Speaker 1: make you react? And you're like you start to like
Speaker 1: actually talk about it, like probably for the first time
Speaker 1: ever in my case at least, Uh it does. It
Speaker 1: does lead to a lot of good things after the fact. So, uh,
Speaker 1: it sounds like you guys had an interesting experience. I
Speaker 1: don't want to call it good, but uh, you know,
Speaker 1: I haven't seen the finale yet, but we're looking forward
Speaker 1: to watching. I uh, we're we We've been biding a
Speaker 1: lot of episodes of dating shows here in this household,
Speaker 1: so that's the next one on the list for us
Speaker 1: for sure. Sounds yeah, I think you'll do it. I
Speaker 1: know Actuley and I are definitely gonna watch it. But
Speaker 1: the only issue is that what what you guys said.
Speaker 1: When we watch it, She's definitely gonna be like this
Speaker 1: something that you want? Do you want to date someone
Speaker 1: completely different than me? And like, no, I don't. I'm
Speaker 1: over it. I'm fine, Like I love you, I want
Speaker 1: to be with you. I mean, she says that stuff. Now,
Speaker 1: let alone if we watch the show about Mary, you
Speaker 1: know people who are either gonna get married to data
Speaker 1: other people. Uh well, I give you guys a lot
Speaker 1: of kudos because, uh yeah, like we talked about earlier,
Speaker 1: the fact that you guys did this on national TV.
Speaker 1: That's crazy. But we are certainly excited to watch the show.
Speaker 1: I think the first eight episodes are on Netflix right now,
Speaker 1: so everybody can go. I mean everybody has Netflix, so
Speaker 1: just go on Netflix and watch. Everybody's gonna watch it.
Speaker 1: Who's listening to this anyway, So definitely check out the
Speaker 1: ultimatum Mary or move on and then make sure you
Speaker 1: binge watched the eight episodes before the finale and the
Speaker 1: reunion drop. I think it's April next Wednesday, so a
Speaker 1: little less than a week away. But Randall, Jake, thank
Speaker 1: you so much for coming on. We really appreciate it,
Speaker 1: and uh definitely come back soon. Thank you so much.
Speaker 1: Appreciate it than appreciate it. All Right, that's gonna do
Speaker 1: it for this week's episode of Help I Suck at Dating.
Speaker 1: Big thank you to Jake and Randall be sure to
Speaker 1: check them out on the Ultimatum um on Netflix. So
Speaker 1: binge that Serena. We know that you left, well you
Speaker 1: didn't leave the last podcast you were on, you were
Speaker 1: you kind of had a planned exit. But if you
Speaker 1: ever want to come back, if you ever want to
Speaker 1: be a permanent fixture on help I suck you dating
Speaker 1: despite the name, We would love to have you as
Speaker 1: often and as many times as you're willing to. Uh So,
Speaker 1: thank you so much for joining us, Thank you for
Speaker 1: having me, guys, I will come back anytime. Well, thank
Speaker 1: you nice. We're gonna hold you to that. Best of
Speaker 1: luck with the move, best of luck with the visa.
Speaker 1: Most importantly, it sounds like that's the biggest thing kind
Speaker 1: of on on ice here. But well, we'll keep our
Speaker 1: fingers crossed for you, and we can't wait to talk
Speaker 1: to you. I think you're gonna be just fine. Thank you.
Speaker 1: Whoever they're a Bachelor fan, yeah, maybe they're listening to us.
Speaker 1: They can speed up that process a little, dude. Okay,
Speaker 1: before you leave tangent side, nowe, do you guys ever
Speaker 1: go to like the d m V or something and
Speaker 1: you're always like, Okay, I hope I get someone that
Speaker 1: watches a bachelor because maybe they'll be like a little
Speaker 1: bit nicer to me, maybe they'll give me like a
Speaker 1: little bit of a That's much like I'm always hoping,
Speaker 1: like I get a cut, Like Joe will be like,
Speaker 1: let's go to the girl. Maybe she's a fan. I
Speaker 1: mean like, yeah, we're not ever doing anything shady, So
Speaker 1: I don't know why you think you maybe get through
Speaker 1: a little faster. I do it in every day of
Speaker 1: my life, like actually, and I would go never know
Speaker 1: what it is, will profile and be like, I think
Speaker 1: she's a bachelor, man, let's go to that one. It's
Speaker 1: like my sister called me the other day and she
Speaker 1: was trying to book an appointment to get like an
Speaker 1: IVY therapy treatment, and she's like, the chick recognized my
Speaker 1: name when I was booking an appointment for next week.
Speaker 1: And she's like, we actually have an appointment today. I
Speaker 1: just saw your name and I know that's exactly what
Speaker 1: I'm talking about. That's perfect. And then there are also
Speaker 1: occasions where I will avoid it, Like yesterday I was
Speaker 1: going to Starbucks and there was like ten um you know,
Speaker 1: year old girls standing in line, and I turned around,
Speaker 1: so fast, and I did not even think about stepping
Speaker 1: foot in the Starbucks, Like I don't want to deal
Speaker 1: with this right now. But there are certain instances, yeah,
Speaker 1: like d m V or appointments or um, whatever it
Speaker 1: might be. But that's funny. I'm glad that we're on
Speaker 1: the same page on that. Oh yeah, definitely. There's there's
Speaker 1: advantages that sometimes just come at the right time that
Speaker 1: you're like, you know, this was a magical moment. Yeah,
Speaker 1: one day, we're not going to have this advantage, you
Speaker 1: know what. I mean to remind as well of you
Speaker 1: guys and abuse it until the day it dies, exactly.
Speaker 1: I tell my friends and take advantage like if you
Speaker 1: can drop my name to help yourself, like please do it.
Speaker 1: And then who do you think you are? Like you're
Speaker 1: you're like an elist celebrity, Like we can't use your name.
Speaker 1: That's really selfless of you. I did the exact opposite.
Speaker 1: My friends are always like, hey, can you just like
Speaker 1: can you like drop your name to to get in
Speaker 1: faster or something. I'm like, absolutely not go and say
Speaker 1: my name, keep my name out here, get out please?
Speaker 1: All right, Well you guys, we gotta go, so thank
Speaker 1: you so much. Against Serina, we can't wait to hear
Speaker 1: from you again. And like I said, if you want
Speaker 1: to be a permanent co host, we gotta a vacant
Speaker 1: spot with your name on it. So um, we'll see
Speaker 1: you soon, you guys soon, Thanks for having me. Bye
Speaker 1: bye bye. Follow help by suck at Dating on I
Speaker 1: Heart Radio or wherever you listen to podcast