1 00:00:01,320 --> 00:00:04,600 Speaker 1: Hey, lady, is doctor dom here. If you like this 2 00:00:04,720 --> 00:00:07,240 Speaker 1: show and you want to make your own, let me 3 00:00:07,280 --> 00:00:10,840 Speaker 1: tell you about the free platform Anchor. It's a creation 4 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:13,800 Speaker 1: tool that allows you to record and edit your podcast 5 00:00:13,920 --> 00:00:17,280 Speaker 1: right from your phone or computer. You can add songs 6 00:00:17,280 --> 00:00:21,000 Speaker 1: from Spotify and create any type of content that you 7 00:00:21,079 --> 00:00:24,360 Speaker 1: are looking for. Anchor will distribute it all for you 8 00:00:24,760 --> 00:00:28,440 Speaker 1: so it can be heard on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and more. 9 00:00:29,160 --> 00:00:32,040 Speaker 1: Download the free Anchor app or go to anchor dot 10 00:00:32,159 --> 00:00:33,800 Speaker 1: fm to get started. 11 00:00:33,880 --> 00:00:35,120 Speaker 2: On this week's episode. 12 00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:40,400 Speaker 3: In her Space, thank you responded to some random posts 13 00:00:40,400 --> 00:00:43,240 Speaker 3: I put on a list serve about grad school and 14 00:00:43,360 --> 00:00:45,920 Speaker 3: took time to like talk with me about coming to 15 00:00:45,960 --> 00:00:48,960 Speaker 3: the University of Georgia and what the program might be like, 16 00:00:49,040 --> 00:00:50,639 Speaker 3: and like these are the kinds of things you will 17 00:00:50,760 --> 00:00:53,440 Speaker 3: look for in a program. So I feel like there 18 00:00:53,479 --> 00:00:56,040 Speaker 3: have been lots of people who have poured into me 19 00:00:56,240 --> 00:00:57,760 Speaker 3: for me to do what I need to do in 20 00:00:57,760 --> 00:00:59,960 Speaker 3: my career, and so I feel like it's only appropriate 21 00:01:00,280 --> 00:01:02,720 Speaker 3: and write that I do that same thing for other people. 22 00:01:03,120 --> 00:01:08,920 Speaker 4: Yes, and welcome to her Space, a podcast dedicated to 23 00:01:09,080 --> 00:01:14,600 Speaker 4: uplifting women like you. We're your hosts, Doctor Dominique Broussard, 24 00:01:14,680 --> 00:01:17,600 Speaker 4: a college professor and a psychologist. 25 00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:21,560 Speaker 2: And Terry Lomax, a techie and a motivational speaker. In 26 00:01:21,600 --> 00:01:25,600 Speaker 2: a world where Black women are often misrepresented and misunderstood, 27 00:01:26,040 --> 00:01:30,800 Speaker 2: please join us as we initiate authentic conversations on everything 28 00:01:30,880 --> 00:01:34,080 Speaker 2: from five roids to fake friends and create a safe 29 00:01:34,080 --> 00:01:43,759 Speaker 2: space where black women can just be. If you haven't 30 00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:46,560 Speaker 2: heard of today's guest, you just might be living under 31 00:01:46,560 --> 00:01:48,680 Speaker 2: a rock. But no judgment. We're about to get you 32 00:01:48,760 --> 00:01:53,920 Speaker 2: hit okay. Doctor Joy Harden Bradford is a licensed psychologist, speaker, 33 00:01:54,280 --> 00:01:57,480 Speaker 2: and the host of the wildly popular mental health podcast 34 00:01:57,960 --> 00:02:02,120 Speaker 2: Therapy for Black Girls. Received her bachelor's degree in psychology 35 00:02:02,120 --> 00:02:06,520 Speaker 2: from Xavier University of Louisiana, her master's degree in vocational 36 00:02:06,560 --> 00:02:12,040 Speaker 2: Rehabilitation counseling from Arkansas State, and her PhD in Counseling 37 00:02:12,080 --> 00:02:15,960 Speaker 2: psychology from the University of Georgia. Her work focuses on 38 00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:20,240 Speaker 2: making mental health topics more relevant and accessible for Black women, 39 00:02:20,680 --> 00:02:23,640 Speaker 2: and she specialized in creating spaces for black women to 40 00:02:23,680 --> 00:02:28,480 Speaker 2: have fuller and healthier relationships with themselves and others. But wait, 41 00:02:28,680 --> 00:02:33,239 Speaker 2: there's more. She's been featured in Oh, The Oprah magazine Bustle, 42 00:02:33,560 --> 00:02:39,359 Speaker 2: Huffington Post, Black Enterprise, Women's Health, BuzzFeed, Teen, Vogue, and Essence. 43 00:02:39,960 --> 00:02:42,840 Speaker 2: Doctor Joy lives in Atlanta, Georgia, with her husband and 44 00:02:42,880 --> 00:02:46,000 Speaker 2: two sons. Now, Lady, as you can imagine, we're trying 45 00:02:46,000 --> 00:02:48,240 Speaker 2: to keep it professional and not fan out, okay, because 46 00:02:48,240 --> 00:02:51,360 Speaker 2: this is the Doctor Joy right here. So without further ado, 47 00:02:51,400 --> 00:02:53,440 Speaker 2: doctor Joey want to welcome you to her space and 48 00:02:53,480 --> 00:02:55,320 Speaker 2: thank you so much for being here with us today. 49 00:02:56,160 --> 00:02:58,520 Speaker 3: Thank you so much for having me. I'm excited to 50 00:02:58,600 --> 00:03:01,760 Speaker 3: chat with you. 51 00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:06,440 Speaker 4: Like Terry said, we're gonna try not to fangirl too much. 52 00:03:07,600 --> 00:03:09,520 Speaker 4: So I'm gonna start us off with our quote of 53 00:03:09,520 --> 00:03:13,359 Speaker 4: the day, and our quote of the day comes from 54 00:03:13,720 --> 00:03:21,080 Speaker 4: doctor Joey herself. Sometimes therapy is hard work. I'm gonna 55 00:03:21,080 --> 00:03:27,480 Speaker 4: say that one more time. Sometimes therapy is hard work. Now, 56 00:03:27,520 --> 00:03:31,919 Speaker 4: Doctor Joy, I hear that quote. I hear it from 57 00:03:31,919 --> 00:03:35,880 Speaker 4: two perspectives. I hear it from one perspective, from the 58 00:03:35,920 --> 00:03:41,360 Speaker 4: client side, that diving into therapy can be hard. But 59 00:03:42,640 --> 00:03:47,480 Speaker 4: I also hear that from the therapist side, that doing 60 00:03:47,640 --> 00:03:51,920 Speaker 4: this work can be hard. And so part of what 61 00:03:52,160 --> 00:03:56,880 Speaker 4: we want to talk to you about today is what 62 00:03:57,040 --> 00:04:00,640 Speaker 4: is this work like for you from the therapy a side. 63 00:04:01,160 --> 00:04:03,880 Speaker 4: I'm just hoping that this conversation kind of gives people 64 00:04:03,960 --> 00:04:08,680 Speaker 4: more insight into who doctor Joy really is and what 65 00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:12,240 Speaker 4: truly inspired therapy for Black girls. 66 00:04:12,560 --> 00:04:14,680 Speaker 3: Now I'm good, So, Doctor Jordan. 67 00:04:14,760 --> 00:04:18,400 Speaker 2: Oftentimes we see someone blow up on social media, right, 68 00:04:18,440 --> 00:04:20,440 Speaker 2: and many of us only see the victory. We only 69 00:04:20,440 --> 00:04:22,719 Speaker 2: see the lit life for the features and the glam, 70 00:04:23,080 --> 00:04:24,840 Speaker 2: and so we love to know what were you doing 71 00:04:24,839 --> 00:04:27,240 Speaker 2: before therapy for Black girls and what was life like 72 00:04:27,279 --> 00:04:27,760 Speaker 2: for you then? 73 00:04:28,520 --> 00:04:32,000 Speaker 3: Yeah, So it's so funny because I feel like I 74 00:04:32,040 --> 00:04:34,680 Speaker 3: have been doing therapy for black girls even before therapy 75 00:04:34,720 --> 00:04:38,000 Speaker 3: for black girls was a thing, you know, So I 76 00:04:38,080 --> 00:04:40,200 Speaker 3: just had not called it that. But much of my 77 00:04:40,320 --> 00:04:43,480 Speaker 3: career has been doing therapy with black women and girls, 78 00:04:44,240 --> 00:04:46,480 Speaker 3: you know. So a lot of my career has been 79 00:04:46,800 --> 00:04:49,680 Speaker 3: in college counseling centers. That's my love. I still love 80 00:04:49,720 --> 00:04:54,279 Speaker 3: working with graduating, undergrad and professional students. And so every 81 00:04:54,320 --> 00:04:57,200 Speaker 3: campus that I was on, I would always be running 82 00:04:57,240 --> 00:05:00,360 Speaker 3: a group for the black women on campus because a 83 00:05:00,360 --> 00:05:02,520 Speaker 3: lot of times, you know, they were not coming into 84 00:05:02,560 --> 00:05:05,080 Speaker 3: the counseling center at the same rates as their peers, 85 00:05:05,400 --> 00:05:07,160 Speaker 3: but I knew they were out there. I knew they 86 00:05:07,160 --> 00:05:09,560 Speaker 3: were having the same kinds of concerns, so it was 87 00:05:09,600 --> 00:05:11,760 Speaker 3: important for me to make sure that I was creating 88 00:05:11,760 --> 00:05:14,800 Speaker 3: a space where their concerns could be heard and they 89 00:05:14,880 --> 00:05:17,360 Speaker 3: knew that the counseling center existed and they could develop 90 00:05:17,360 --> 00:05:20,920 Speaker 3: a relationship with one other therapist. So, like I said, 91 00:05:20,920 --> 00:05:22,920 Speaker 3: I feel like that was therapy for Black Girls even 92 00:05:23,000 --> 00:05:26,360 Speaker 3: before Therapy for Black Girls became the website. You know. So, 93 00:05:26,520 --> 00:05:28,680 Speaker 3: like most of my career has been in college and 94 00:05:28,960 --> 00:05:34,799 Speaker 3: college counseling, and I have written recently when twenty eighteen, 95 00:05:34,839 --> 00:05:37,839 Speaker 3: I think full time am now doing like the podcast 96 00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:41,400 Speaker 3: and the directory and the speaking, so have transitioned out 97 00:05:41,400 --> 00:05:44,679 Speaker 3: of working full time on a college campus, but still 98 00:05:44,720 --> 00:05:47,200 Speaker 3: see you know, a couple of college students in my 99 00:05:47,279 --> 00:05:48,800 Speaker 3: practice that. 100 00:05:48,880 --> 00:05:51,720 Speaker 2: Is so amazing. And I feel like we often hear 101 00:05:51,800 --> 00:05:54,400 Speaker 2: these stories of people starting small, right, and they always say, like, 102 00:05:54,480 --> 00:05:56,800 Speaker 2: don't despise the days of small beginning. So you were 103 00:05:56,800 --> 00:05:59,239 Speaker 2: doing Therapy for Black Girls even before it got started. 104 00:05:59,440 --> 00:06:01,160 Speaker 2: And I feel like some times on our journey we 105 00:06:01,360 --> 00:06:04,159 Speaker 2: make it discouraged in the beginning, or we're just getting started. 106 00:06:04,480 --> 00:06:07,160 Speaker 2: I would love to know what vision were you holding 107 00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:10,040 Speaker 2: for yourself? You know, prior to twenty seventeen, when you 108 00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:14,560 Speaker 2: really kicked off the platform, Like, what did you envision 109 00:06:14,600 --> 00:06:15,560 Speaker 2: your work looking like? 110 00:06:16,040 --> 00:06:17,720 Speaker 3: Yeah, So I think it's important to go back a 111 00:06:17,760 --> 00:06:20,960 Speaker 3: little because Therapy for Black Girls started in twenty fourteen, 112 00:06:21,880 --> 00:06:24,880 Speaker 3: you know, So it started with me blogging on the site, 113 00:06:25,279 --> 00:06:27,880 Speaker 3: and then in twenty seventeen is when I added the 114 00:06:27,920 --> 00:06:30,440 Speaker 3: podcast and the directory. So I think that's what you're 115 00:06:30,480 --> 00:06:33,080 Speaker 3: referring to when you say twenty seventeen. But it had 116 00:06:33,080 --> 00:06:36,080 Speaker 3: been existent even before then, right, And so I was 117 00:06:36,120 --> 00:06:39,080 Speaker 3: not blogging as frequently or as consistently as I do 118 00:06:39,200 --> 00:06:43,080 Speaker 3: with the podcast, but there was already content there. But 119 00:06:43,120 --> 00:06:46,240 Speaker 3: it's so funny because you know, if five years ago 120 00:06:46,320 --> 00:06:48,360 Speaker 3: you would have asked me, like what my life would be, 121 00:06:48,839 --> 00:06:53,120 Speaker 3: I always envisioned myself, you know, in full time private practice, 122 00:06:53,160 --> 00:06:56,480 Speaker 3: like I love seeing clients, I love doing therapy, and 123 00:06:56,520 --> 00:07:00,320 Speaker 3: so you know, for much of my career that is 124 00:07:00,400 --> 00:07:02,280 Speaker 3: kind of what I had been working for is kind 125 00:07:02,279 --> 00:07:06,000 Speaker 3: of eventually moving into a full time private practice, probably 126 00:07:06,040 --> 00:07:08,719 Speaker 3: still doing training because I love helping you know, new 127 00:07:08,760 --> 00:07:11,280 Speaker 3: therapists kind of get their feet in the ground and 128 00:07:11,360 --> 00:07:13,960 Speaker 3: kind of figure out their you know, career in therapy. 129 00:07:14,920 --> 00:07:17,400 Speaker 3: And so that is kind of the life I had 130 00:07:17,440 --> 00:07:20,560 Speaker 3: been building before Therapy for Black Girls kind of became 131 00:07:20,680 --> 00:07:21,760 Speaker 3: this thing that it is. 132 00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:24,320 Speaker 2: That's so cool. And I feel like we always hear 133 00:07:24,360 --> 00:07:26,360 Speaker 2: people say like it takes ten years to become an 134 00:07:26,400 --> 00:07:30,000 Speaker 2: overnight success, and so people I looked online, I'm like, oh, 135 00:07:30,080 --> 00:07:32,320 Speaker 2: it's this twenty seventeen is when she started the podcast. 136 00:07:32,360 --> 00:07:35,760 Speaker 2: But he was like, I'm not new to this this. 137 00:07:36,360 --> 00:07:38,080 Speaker 2: So it's like, she don't put her time in y'all. 138 00:07:38,080 --> 00:07:39,880 Speaker 2: So she didn't just blow up in two years, like 139 00:07:39,920 --> 00:07:41,480 Speaker 2: she's been really doing the work. 140 00:07:41,480 --> 00:07:42,320 Speaker 3: That's so awesome. 141 00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:46,800 Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, And so when I hear you say that 142 00:07:47,720 --> 00:07:51,960 Speaker 4: you try to train new therapists and to how to 143 00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:54,600 Speaker 4: be in this space. One of the things that I 144 00:07:54,680 --> 00:07:58,000 Speaker 4: think about, you know, when when you also say that 145 00:07:58,080 --> 00:08:01,960 Speaker 4: you're not new to this, is that you've been mentoring 146 00:08:02,040 --> 00:08:06,680 Speaker 4: people or inspiring people for a really long time. And 147 00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:11,560 Speaker 4: I don't know if you remember this, but we first 148 00:08:11,680 --> 00:08:16,520 Speaker 4: met when I was in undergrad and I remember, yeah, 149 00:08:16,600 --> 00:08:22,240 Speaker 4: you were doing the core for UGA graduate school, and 150 00:08:22,640 --> 00:08:26,920 Speaker 4: we had a whole conversation about choosing this career and 151 00:08:27,040 --> 00:08:31,200 Speaker 4: choosing the University of Georgia, and I remember walking away 152 00:08:31,240 --> 00:08:37,160 Speaker 4: from that conversation thinking she is passionate about what she's doing, 153 00:08:37,679 --> 00:08:39,880 Speaker 4: and she's in grad school, like she hasn't even like 154 00:08:40,480 --> 00:08:45,440 Speaker 4: hit her career yet, and another black woman is doing 155 00:08:46,080 --> 00:08:50,400 Speaker 4: pursuing what I thought I could do for myself, And 156 00:08:50,480 --> 00:08:54,360 Speaker 4: so I just want to say thank you. You're part 157 00:08:54,400 --> 00:08:57,320 Speaker 4: of the reason I chose University of Georgia for graduate school. 158 00:08:57,800 --> 00:09:00,800 Speaker 4: But then also thinking about all the work that you 159 00:09:01,080 --> 00:09:04,440 Speaker 4: did at Georgia from when you were in graduate school 160 00:09:05,000 --> 00:09:07,880 Speaker 4: to once you were working in a counseling center there. 161 00:09:08,559 --> 00:09:11,720 Speaker 4: If I'm remember it correctly, the group was my sister's 162 00:09:11,800 --> 00:09:17,200 Speaker 4: keeping m Yeah. And so you, like you aren't new this. 163 00:09:17,360 --> 00:09:21,600 Speaker 4: You had been doing this for inspiring women in ways 164 00:09:21,679 --> 00:09:25,680 Speaker 4: that you probably don't even know how many lives you 165 00:09:25,760 --> 00:09:28,960 Speaker 4: have touched in how many Black women you have inspired 166 00:09:29,040 --> 00:09:32,040 Speaker 4: to pursue careers in mental health. And so I just 167 00:09:32,080 --> 00:09:34,480 Speaker 4: want to say thank you for the work that you're doing. 168 00:09:35,520 --> 00:09:38,600 Speaker 3: Thank you, Dominie. Yeah, I remember that very differently. So 169 00:09:38,720 --> 00:09:40,920 Speaker 3: I was, you know, still a grand student, like you said, 170 00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:43,760 Speaker 3: at the University of Georgia, and because I'm from Louisiana, 171 00:09:44,160 --> 00:09:46,240 Speaker 3: I got a chance to go back to Louisiana to 172 00:09:46,280 --> 00:09:48,960 Speaker 3: do the recruitment trip. So I visited there and Xavier 173 00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:52,319 Speaker 3: and a couple of other Louisiana colleges and universities, and 174 00:09:52,360 --> 00:09:55,160 Speaker 3: I definitely remember having that conversation with you and then 175 00:09:55,240 --> 00:09:57,720 Speaker 3: being so excited that you actually chose to come to Georgia. 176 00:09:57,760 --> 00:10:00,920 Speaker 3: So that was a really cool moment. But yeah, you know, 177 00:10:01,040 --> 00:10:04,000 Speaker 3: I feel like that is important for me because somebody 178 00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:07,680 Speaker 3: did that for me. So I this was before, like 179 00:10:07,840 --> 00:10:10,440 Speaker 3: I think Facebook and things like really took off. I 180 00:10:10,520 --> 00:10:13,200 Speaker 3: remember being curious about where I wanted to go for 181 00:10:13,280 --> 00:10:16,800 Speaker 3: grad school myself, and doctor Judie Lee Webb, who has 182 00:10:16,880 --> 00:10:21,320 Speaker 3: been on the podcast talking about eating disorders, responded to 183 00:10:21,360 --> 00:10:24,280 Speaker 3: some random posts I put on a list Serve about 184 00:10:24,320 --> 00:10:27,160 Speaker 3: grad school and took time to like talk with me 185 00:10:27,280 --> 00:10:30,160 Speaker 3: about coming to the University of Georgia and what the 186 00:10:30,200 --> 00:10:32,199 Speaker 3: program might be like, and like these are the kinds 187 00:10:32,240 --> 00:10:34,920 Speaker 3: of things you were looking for in a program. So 188 00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:36,959 Speaker 3: I feel like there have been lots of people who 189 00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:39,440 Speaker 3: have poured into me for me to do what I 190 00:10:39,480 --> 00:10:41,040 Speaker 3: need to do in my career, and so I feel 191 00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:43,560 Speaker 3: like it's only appropriate and right that I do that 192 00:10:43,640 --> 00:10:44,920 Speaker 3: same thing for other people. 193 00:10:45,320 --> 00:10:49,320 Speaker 4: Yes, and I completely agree that is so important for 194 00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:52,200 Speaker 4: us to do. And so then when we think about 195 00:10:52,400 --> 00:10:56,760 Speaker 4: therapy for Black girls and the directory, talk to us 196 00:10:56,760 --> 00:10:59,679 Speaker 4: a little bit about what inspired you to actually start 197 00:10:59,720 --> 00:11:03,520 Speaker 4: the directories so that people will find therapists that will 198 00:11:03,559 --> 00:11:05,320 Speaker 4: look like them. Hmm. 199 00:11:05,720 --> 00:11:08,360 Speaker 3: Yeah. So I spent a lot of time on social media, 200 00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:10,840 Speaker 3: So you guys probably know that, Like I'm a huge 201 00:11:10,960 --> 00:11:13,880 Speaker 3: like pop culture keeping up with like what's happening in 202 00:11:14,360 --> 00:11:16,520 Speaker 3: media and stuff. So I spent a lot of time 203 00:11:16,559 --> 00:11:20,839 Speaker 3: on social media. So I kept seeing these conversations or 204 00:11:20,880 --> 00:11:24,120 Speaker 3: people asking questions like, Hey, does anybody have a black therapist. 205 00:11:24,360 --> 00:11:26,320 Speaker 3: I'm looking for a black therapist, you know, just like 206 00:11:26,360 --> 00:11:29,600 Speaker 3: these random conversations from lots of different people. And so 207 00:11:29,840 --> 00:11:32,480 Speaker 3: I saw it enough that I felt like, Okay, there 208 00:11:32,559 --> 00:11:34,760 Speaker 3: must be a way for us to like have a 209 00:11:34,800 --> 00:11:38,640 Speaker 3: centralized location where people can find these therapists that they're 210 00:11:38,640 --> 00:11:42,120 Speaker 3: looking for. So at the end of twenty sixteen, I 211 00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:46,120 Speaker 3: put together a quick Google doc and sent it out 212 00:11:46,160 --> 00:11:48,560 Speaker 3: on Facebook and Twitter saying, Hey, if you're a black 213 00:11:48,559 --> 00:11:50,760 Speaker 3: woman and then you've had a good experience with a therapist, 214 00:11:51,400 --> 00:11:54,200 Speaker 3: send me their contact information and I will compile it 215 00:11:54,240 --> 00:11:56,920 Speaker 3: by fate for people to be able to connect with 216 00:11:56,960 --> 00:12:00,240 Speaker 3: these other therapists that you've had good experiences with. At 217 00:12:00,280 --> 00:12:01,920 Speaker 3: the end of that month, I think that was in 218 00:12:01,960 --> 00:12:04,720 Speaker 3: December of twenty sixteen. I think I already had ninety 219 00:12:04,760 --> 00:12:08,360 Speaker 3: therapists in the directory, and now they're over fifteen hundred 220 00:12:08,400 --> 00:12:11,920 Speaker 3: therapists in the directory. So I think it just really 221 00:12:11,960 --> 00:12:15,840 Speaker 3: speaks to the need that people have wanting to be 222 00:12:16,040 --> 00:12:18,440 Speaker 3: in therapy with people who they feel like get them 223 00:12:18,559 --> 00:12:22,160 Speaker 3: and where there will be a level of understanding. And 224 00:12:22,240 --> 00:12:25,400 Speaker 3: for therapists who are really excited about providing that service 225 00:12:25,440 --> 00:12:27,360 Speaker 3: to potential clients, that's amazing. 226 00:12:27,400 --> 00:12:29,560 Speaker 2: And that Google doc what does that look like today? 227 00:12:29,640 --> 00:12:32,120 Speaker 2: Is it now? Like on the actual website? Now? What 228 00:12:32,280 --> 00:12:35,720 Speaker 2: is I always obsessed over like the beginning, what it 229 00:12:35,760 --> 00:12:37,400 Speaker 2: started as, and then where it is today. So I 230 00:12:37,440 --> 00:12:39,280 Speaker 2: love the listeners to know if they aren't familiar. 231 00:12:40,320 --> 00:12:42,640 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah. So of course the Google doc I was 232 00:12:42,720 --> 00:12:46,240 Speaker 3: managing all myself because it was relatively easy with only 233 00:12:46,320 --> 00:12:49,439 Speaker 3: ninety people. But as it grew in popularity and then 234 00:12:49,440 --> 00:12:52,360 Speaker 3: more therapists wanted to enter their information, I realized that 235 00:12:52,360 --> 00:12:55,920 Speaker 3: that was not something I could do and manage by myself, 236 00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:59,360 Speaker 3: so I had to hire web developers to actually build 237 00:12:59,360 --> 00:13:03,480 Speaker 3: the directory in the form that it's in now so beautiful. 238 00:13:03,520 --> 00:13:05,280 Speaker 2: I love it. This is just so amazing. I have 239 00:13:05,400 --> 00:13:08,200 Speaker 2: like goosebumps, which just so exciting. This is amazing. So 240 00:13:08,240 --> 00:13:10,600 Speaker 2: I want to know, when it comes to black women 241 00:13:10,640 --> 00:13:13,280 Speaker 2: in mental health, doctor Joy, what are some of the 242 00:13:13,280 --> 00:13:16,000 Speaker 2: things that you've noticed doing the work that you're doing, 243 00:13:16,040 --> 00:13:18,520 Speaker 2: Like if you had a name like top three top themes, 244 00:13:18,559 --> 00:13:20,559 Speaker 2: I guess what continues to show up? 245 00:13:21,679 --> 00:13:23,920 Speaker 3: Mm hmmm. I think one of the biggest ones is 246 00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:27,720 Speaker 3: always boundaries. And you know, you guys probably know this 247 00:13:27,960 --> 00:13:30,640 Speaker 3: just as well. You know, like black women tend to 248 00:13:30,679 --> 00:13:33,600 Speaker 3: do a lot of taking care of other people, and 249 00:13:33,640 --> 00:13:35,960 Speaker 3: so a lot of times that means that they are 250 00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:39,480 Speaker 3: not setting healthy boundaries in their lives. People are taking 251 00:13:39,480 --> 00:13:43,079 Speaker 3: advantage of these relationships. You know, they are not kind 252 00:13:43,080 --> 00:13:45,520 Speaker 3: of pouring into themselves in the same ways that they 253 00:13:45,559 --> 00:13:48,240 Speaker 3: are pouring into other people, which then leads that leads 254 00:13:48,280 --> 00:13:51,360 Speaker 3: to you know, lots of breakdowns in their own lives. 255 00:13:51,360 --> 00:13:53,640 Speaker 3: So maybe they're not taking as good a care themselves 256 00:13:53,679 --> 00:13:56,760 Speaker 3: in terms of physical physical health. So maybe they're not 257 00:13:56,840 --> 00:13:59,920 Speaker 3: exercising or not going to sleep appropriately or you know, 258 00:14:00,200 --> 00:14:01,960 Speaker 3: kind of eating on the run. So they're not paying 259 00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:04,360 Speaker 3: attention to those kinds of things. So I think that 260 00:14:04,520 --> 00:14:06,400 Speaker 3: is probably one of the things that I've seen come 261 00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:07,520 Speaker 3: up most often. 262 00:14:08,960 --> 00:14:10,760 Speaker 2: That's a really good point that actually takes us to 263 00:14:10,800 --> 00:14:12,400 Speaker 2: this next question I wanted to ask you. So I 264 00:14:12,440 --> 00:14:15,760 Speaker 2: read this article on fast Company called the Hidden Black 265 00:14:15,880 --> 00:14:19,120 Speaker 2: Tax and talks about how many black professionals feel pressure 266 00:14:19,200 --> 00:14:22,400 Speaker 2: to share their income with struggling family members. They may 267 00:14:22,400 --> 00:14:24,120 Speaker 2: be the person that made it and sort of broke 268 00:14:24,160 --> 00:14:26,880 Speaker 2: the generational cycles, but now the family's trying to pull 269 00:14:26,920 --> 00:14:28,600 Speaker 2: them down, like, hey, can I can I code a 270 00:14:28,600 --> 00:14:30,840 Speaker 2: couple dollars? Can I get some of this? What advice 271 00:14:30,880 --> 00:14:33,280 Speaker 2: do you have for you know, a young woman or 272 00:14:33,440 --> 00:14:35,360 Speaker 2: young man that might be struggling with something like that 273 00:14:35,400 --> 00:14:37,720 Speaker 2: where the family is constantly sort of pulling on them 274 00:14:37,720 --> 00:14:40,200 Speaker 2: and they want to help, but they're not able to 275 00:14:40,200 --> 00:14:43,320 Speaker 2: build generational wealth because of the support they're providing. 276 00:14:44,920 --> 00:14:47,240 Speaker 3: Yeah, that is a very real concern. I mean, and 277 00:14:47,280 --> 00:14:49,880 Speaker 3: you hear that a lot, especially, you know, as black 278 00:14:49,920 --> 00:14:53,000 Speaker 3: women become more and more educated and getting better and 279 00:14:53,040 --> 00:14:54,840 Speaker 3: better jobs, and you know, being able to kind of 280 00:14:54,880 --> 00:14:58,400 Speaker 3: walk into these jobs where they have amazing salaries, that 281 00:14:58,600 --> 00:15:00,840 Speaker 3: is a lot of times the expect so I think 282 00:15:00,840 --> 00:15:03,160 Speaker 3: it is a very real concern for a lot of people, 283 00:15:03,200 --> 00:15:04,760 Speaker 3: and I think that there is a way that you 284 00:15:04,840 --> 00:15:08,000 Speaker 3: can do that but set a boundary around it. Right, So, 285 00:15:08,120 --> 00:15:10,720 Speaker 3: you know, you can maybe set aside a certain amount 286 00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:14,560 Speaker 3: of your salary every month for taking care of people 287 00:15:14,560 --> 00:15:16,880 Speaker 3: at home, but then after we have hit that budget, 288 00:15:17,240 --> 00:15:19,520 Speaker 3: then you will have to just wait until next month 289 00:15:19,600 --> 00:15:21,160 Speaker 3: kind of thing. Right, So I think that there's a 290 00:15:21,160 --> 00:15:23,920 Speaker 3: way that you can add that to your budget without 291 00:15:23,920 --> 00:15:27,160 Speaker 3: it becoming you know, just kind of giving away all 292 00:15:27,200 --> 00:15:29,320 Speaker 3: of your money and then you're not appropriately taking care 293 00:15:29,320 --> 00:15:29,960 Speaker 3: of yourself. 294 00:15:31,320 --> 00:15:35,920 Speaker 4: And so, as we're talking about setting boundaries, how has 295 00:15:35,960 --> 00:15:39,000 Speaker 4: it been for you to kind of set boundaries within 296 00:15:39,520 --> 00:15:44,280 Speaker 4: your friend circle, your family in terms of now I 297 00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:47,000 Speaker 4: have this, I have all of these things going for 298 00:15:47,120 --> 00:15:50,400 Speaker 4: me in my career, but I also want to have balance. 299 00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:53,680 Speaker 3: Yeah. So I have two little ones who really don't 300 00:15:54,160 --> 00:15:58,160 Speaker 3: care about any kind of about it, And so I 301 00:15:58,200 --> 00:16:00,720 Speaker 3: think that that helps me to be really grounded and 302 00:16:01,080 --> 00:16:04,000 Speaker 3: to make sure that I'm like appropriately kind of setting 303 00:16:04,000 --> 00:16:06,840 Speaker 3: boundaries around my work, because I think I often have 304 00:16:06,960 --> 00:16:09,840 Speaker 3: the other struggle, right, the struggle of like wanting to 305 00:16:09,880 --> 00:16:12,120 Speaker 3: maybe do too much with work and not paying enough 306 00:16:12,120 --> 00:16:16,000 Speaker 3: attention to everything else. And so my little ones definitely 307 00:16:16,080 --> 00:16:17,960 Speaker 3: helped me to kind of stay focused on Okay, now 308 00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:20,120 Speaker 3: it's mammy time, Like you got to put that down. 309 00:16:21,320 --> 00:16:24,480 Speaker 3: But also, like my family and friends have been incredibly supportive, 310 00:16:24,600 --> 00:16:26,360 Speaker 3: and I feel like they really help me to be 311 00:16:26,480 --> 00:16:29,480 Speaker 3: grounded because they have known me, you know, for a 312 00:16:29,520 --> 00:16:32,400 Speaker 3: lot of my life before doctor Joy was a thing 313 00:16:32,480 --> 00:16:34,360 Speaker 3: or therapy for black girls was a thing, And so 314 00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:37,600 Speaker 3: when I'm in conversation and in community with them, it 315 00:16:37,680 --> 00:16:39,920 Speaker 3: helps me to kind of just feel like, Okay, I 316 00:16:39,960 --> 00:16:43,240 Speaker 3: can just be Joy the sister, the daughter, the friend 317 00:16:43,640 --> 00:16:46,600 Speaker 3: as opposed to you know, this professional piece that requires 318 00:16:46,640 --> 00:16:47,560 Speaker 3: a lot of my time. 319 00:16:48,080 --> 00:16:50,880 Speaker 2: That's so incredible because it's nothing like going home just 320 00:16:50,920 --> 00:16:52,480 Speaker 2: being able to let your hair down and just be 321 00:16:52,560 --> 00:16:54,360 Speaker 2: you and I have to kind of put on this 322 00:16:54,360 --> 00:16:55,160 Speaker 2: this person. 323 00:16:55,240 --> 00:16:58,240 Speaker 3: So that's really good exactly. Yeah. 324 00:16:58,280 --> 00:17:00,520 Speaker 4: I think it's so helpful too that you have little 325 00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:04,160 Speaker 4: ones at home that are like, listen, I don't care 326 00:17:04,359 --> 00:17:08,840 Speaker 4: who you want else. When you're right here in this house, 327 00:17:09,080 --> 00:17:10,840 Speaker 4: you are Mommy. 328 00:17:10,920 --> 00:17:12,520 Speaker 3: Right, we need Mommy. 329 00:17:12,800 --> 00:17:15,439 Speaker 4: Like now, I don't care if you said you had 330 00:17:15,480 --> 00:17:18,000 Speaker 4: a meeting or you have to record a podcast episode 331 00:17:18,040 --> 00:17:21,040 Speaker 4: right now. I need you so focus. 332 00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:23,760 Speaker 3: On us, right, which is why I try to do 333 00:17:23,800 --> 00:17:25,520 Speaker 3: a lot of it, you know, while they're in school. 334 00:17:25,560 --> 00:17:28,040 Speaker 3: So I mean I think I do said very or 335 00:17:28,080 --> 00:17:30,560 Speaker 3: at least try to set their boundaries around, like the 336 00:17:30,640 --> 00:17:33,080 Speaker 3: time when they're not in school, so that you know, 337 00:17:33,080 --> 00:17:35,080 Speaker 3: I'm not taking meetings, I'm not doing a lot of 338 00:17:35,119 --> 00:17:38,199 Speaker 3: things in the evenings and on weekends because I know 339 00:17:38,280 --> 00:17:40,680 Speaker 3: that that is the time that is dedicated to my family. 340 00:17:41,680 --> 00:17:44,240 Speaker 2: Now, doctor joy Do, we were research we found that 341 00:17:45,960 --> 00:17:48,760 Speaker 2: you get very good. I want to say, I know, okay, 342 00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:51,080 Speaker 2: I'm trying to work on my language. I know therapists 343 00:17:51,080 --> 00:17:53,280 Speaker 2: don't give advice. I'm Don's been teaching me about the 344 00:17:53,359 --> 00:17:56,920 Speaker 2: language of therapists and therapy, so I wouldn't say advice. 345 00:17:57,480 --> 00:17:59,200 Speaker 2: She's always like, Tara, you gotta tell you got to 346 00:17:59,280 --> 00:18:02,359 Speaker 2: use the disclaimer. You can't just say Dom's are resident therapist. 347 00:18:02,440 --> 00:18:05,960 Speaker 2: So I'm gonna ask what guidance would you provide by 348 00:18:06,000 --> 00:18:09,359 Speaker 2: way of h or as it relates to breakups. I 349 00:18:09,359 --> 00:18:11,159 Speaker 2: know that dealing with breakups is something that like a 350 00:18:11,240 --> 00:18:13,240 Speaker 2: niche topic for you. So if someone is dealing with 351 00:18:13,280 --> 00:18:15,280 Speaker 2: a breakup, what's some of the top advice you give 352 00:18:15,320 --> 00:18:16,000 Speaker 2: for them. 353 00:18:16,680 --> 00:18:20,160 Speaker 3: Mm hmmm, Yeah, that definitely is my specialty in my practice. 354 00:18:20,920 --> 00:18:23,439 Speaker 3: So one of the things that often takes quite a 355 00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:27,160 Speaker 3: lot of time is working with clients related to their 356 00:18:27,200 --> 00:18:31,199 Speaker 3: ex and social media. So there is often lots of 357 00:18:31,240 --> 00:18:35,280 Speaker 3: resistance to wanting to unfollow, to really kind of cut 358 00:18:35,320 --> 00:18:38,120 Speaker 3: those digital ties. But a lot of times that really 359 00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:41,320 Speaker 3: keeps people stuck because they're trying to like put a 360 00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:43,960 Speaker 3: story together based on what they see their X sharing 361 00:18:44,000 --> 00:18:47,800 Speaker 3: on Instagram that is often inaccurate and really causing them 362 00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:50,840 Speaker 3: more pain. And so we spend a lot of time 363 00:18:50,880 --> 00:18:53,399 Speaker 3: talking about what kind of relationship you still have with 364 00:18:53,480 --> 00:18:56,160 Speaker 3: your ex on social media because a lot of times 365 00:18:56,160 --> 00:18:58,080 Speaker 3: that is actually causing more harm. 366 00:18:58,920 --> 00:19:00,919 Speaker 2: So basically, I don't know who needs to hear this, 367 00:19:01,040 --> 00:19:04,240 Speaker 2: but follow them boo, okay, follow them. 368 00:19:04,480 --> 00:19:07,080 Speaker 4: Yeah, as soon as you can go ahead. 369 00:19:06,800 --> 00:19:10,119 Speaker 3: And unfollow the lead, unfriend all of that stuff. And 370 00:19:10,280 --> 00:19:12,440 Speaker 3: I think it's really cool that a lot of platforms 371 00:19:12,720 --> 00:19:14,960 Speaker 3: have kind of built in some of that now because 372 00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:17,760 Speaker 3: they realize, like, this is the real world now, like 373 00:19:17,840 --> 00:19:19,960 Speaker 3: this is the way we operate in terms of these 374 00:19:19,960 --> 00:19:23,360 Speaker 3: digital relationships now, and so making that a little easier 375 00:19:23,400 --> 00:19:25,240 Speaker 3: of a transition, I think is a cool thing that 376 00:19:25,320 --> 00:19:27,480 Speaker 3: some of them have built into the platform. 377 00:19:27,560 --> 00:19:29,760 Speaker 2: Very good advice there. Thank you so much for that, 378 00:19:30,119 --> 00:19:31,840 Speaker 2: And we want to move on doctor Jordy to talk 379 00:19:31,840 --> 00:19:34,360 Speaker 2: a bit about your present life and you know how 380 00:19:34,400 --> 00:19:36,760 Speaker 2: it's like changed for you. You know, now that you're 381 00:19:36,800 --> 00:19:40,000 Speaker 2: easily recognizable and people are demanding more of you. What 382 00:19:40,080 --> 00:19:41,480 Speaker 2: is that like for you now? Because we may have 383 00:19:41,520 --> 00:19:43,760 Speaker 2: some women that are transitioning in their careers and maybe 384 00:19:43,760 --> 00:19:46,040 Speaker 2: they're more noticeable now, So what are some of the 385 00:19:46,119 --> 00:19:49,280 Speaker 2: changes that you've had to sort of become accustomed to. 386 00:19:50,720 --> 00:19:53,600 Speaker 3: Yeah, So I think it's really funny because you know, 387 00:19:53,640 --> 00:19:55,560 Speaker 3: a lot of people know me from the podcast, so 388 00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:59,520 Speaker 3: people will recognize my voice sometimes before they even recognize 389 00:19:59,520 --> 00:20:02,480 Speaker 3: who I am. So they're like, oh, Therapy for Black Girls, 390 00:20:02,480 --> 00:20:05,520 Speaker 3: which is a really cool experience, right, Like that's not 391 00:20:05,560 --> 00:20:08,880 Speaker 3: something that I had anticipated. So when people will hear 392 00:20:08,920 --> 00:20:11,199 Speaker 3: me talk and can connect it to the podcast, I 393 00:20:11,200 --> 00:20:14,080 Speaker 3: always think that that's a cool experience, you know, and 394 00:20:14,440 --> 00:20:17,840 Speaker 3: that to me is really awesome, Like it really helps 395 00:20:17,920 --> 00:20:21,399 Speaker 3: me to kind of better understand the impact that the 396 00:20:21,480 --> 00:20:24,800 Speaker 3: podcast and all of the content that we produce through 397 00:20:24,800 --> 00:20:27,800 Speaker 3: Therapy for Black Girls is having on women because you know, 398 00:20:27,960 --> 00:20:31,200 Speaker 3: you don't always get that immediate feedback, and so it's 399 00:20:31,240 --> 00:20:33,200 Speaker 3: really cool to kind of be able to meet listeners 400 00:20:33,200 --> 00:20:35,919 Speaker 3: in person and you know, to be able to have 401 00:20:35,960 --> 00:20:40,160 Speaker 3: conversations with people about like how the content has impacted them. 402 00:20:40,880 --> 00:20:43,760 Speaker 3: But I also think that you have to be very 403 00:20:43,800 --> 00:20:47,200 Speaker 3: careful about that also just in terms of like being 404 00:20:47,240 --> 00:20:51,199 Speaker 3: more of a public figure, because I think you have 405 00:20:51,240 --> 00:20:53,639 Speaker 3: to set boundaries with that too, right, Like, you know, 406 00:20:53,680 --> 00:20:56,399 Speaker 3: so people mostly are very respectful, Like nobody has kind 407 00:20:56,440 --> 00:20:58,119 Speaker 3: of come up to me at dinner or you know, 408 00:20:58,119 --> 00:21:00,440 Speaker 3: and I'm not that much of a public right Like 409 00:21:00,480 --> 00:21:03,920 Speaker 3: I still lead up pretty you know, under the radar life, 410 00:21:03,960 --> 00:21:07,800 Speaker 3: but depending on the circumstance, you know, you do want 411 00:21:07,840 --> 00:21:10,119 Speaker 3: to set a boundary around like how much time you 412 00:21:10,160 --> 00:21:14,879 Speaker 3: can spend like answering questions after an event, or you know, 413 00:21:15,000 --> 00:21:17,600 Speaker 3: like how many pictures are you wanting to take with people? 414 00:21:17,840 --> 00:21:19,960 Speaker 3: Like I still think that that's a different boundary that 415 00:21:20,040 --> 00:21:22,320 Speaker 3: you may have to kind of think about setting for 416 00:21:22,400 --> 00:21:26,160 Speaker 3: yourself that you may not have anticipated. And something else 417 00:21:26,200 --> 00:21:29,280 Speaker 3: that I have been thinking about is just security stuff. 418 00:21:29,320 --> 00:21:32,199 Speaker 3: So you know that I did a live show in 419 00:21:32,200 --> 00:21:34,680 Speaker 3: New York and there was like this weird incident where 420 00:21:34,680 --> 00:21:38,240 Speaker 3: somebody entered the room that like nobody was sure who 421 00:21:38,280 --> 00:21:40,680 Speaker 3: they were, and you know, and I didn't necessarily see 422 00:21:40,680 --> 00:21:43,280 Speaker 3: it in real time, but then people told me afterwards, 423 00:21:43,960 --> 00:21:46,560 Speaker 3: and so it made me think about, like, oh, like 424 00:21:46,840 --> 00:21:49,880 Speaker 3: do I need to maybe have security at certain events? 425 00:21:49,920 --> 00:21:51,959 Speaker 3: You know, just kind of thinking through things that, like 426 00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:56,600 Speaker 3: your life in private practice didn't necessarily necessitate, you know, 427 00:21:56,640 --> 00:21:58,520 Speaker 3: so I think it just comes with a different level 428 00:21:58,600 --> 00:22:00,879 Speaker 3: of like things that you maybe want to have in 429 00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:03,440 Speaker 3: place that you didn't anticipate before. 430 00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:06,399 Speaker 2: That's a really good point. I'm so glad you mentioned that, 431 00:22:06,440 --> 00:22:08,560 Speaker 2: because that never even crossed my mind. The first thing 432 00:22:08,600 --> 00:22:10,840 Speaker 2: I thought about when you shared this is that you 433 00:22:10,960 --> 00:22:13,600 Speaker 2: on you on the phone and the telemarketer calls, I'm like, wait, 434 00:22:13,640 --> 00:22:15,280 Speaker 2: is this doctor Joy? That was the first thing I 435 00:22:15,280 --> 00:22:18,080 Speaker 2: thought about what you said, recognizing your voice being the 436 00:22:18,160 --> 00:22:23,040 Speaker 2: security card. That's actually especially if you're like a private person, 437 00:22:23,040 --> 00:22:25,320 Speaker 2: I would assume, Okay, I'm just gonna make an assumption, 438 00:22:25,359 --> 00:22:28,280 Speaker 2: but would you consider yourself to be more introverted than extroverted? 439 00:22:29,480 --> 00:22:33,200 Speaker 3: No, I'm actually pretty extroverted. Okay, so you're pretty inverted. 440 00:22:33,640 --> 00:22:35,840 Speaker 2: Dom and I we just did a podcast on being 441 00:22:35,840 --> 00:22:39,440 Speaker 2: an introvert versus versus an extrovert, And I can only 442 00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:41,880 Speaker 2: imagine you being like, you know, a person that likes 443 00:22:41,920 --> 00:22:44,080 Speaker 2: your space, and then you go out and people are like, Oh, 444 00:22:44,119 --> 00:22:46,560 Speaker 2: it's doctor Joy over there. You know, it can be overwhelming, 445 00:22:46,640 --> 00:22:47,480 Speaker 2: I think for anyone. 446 00:22:47,800 --> 00:22:52,960 Speaker 3: But yeah, for sharing that, Wow, Yeah. 447 00:22:51,640 --> 00:22:54,359 Speaker 4: That's a lot to take into consideration. And it sounds 448 00:22:54,400 --> 00:22:58,600 Speaker 4: like that means that you're constantly having to re evaluate 449 00:22:59,200 --> 00:23:02,359 Speaker 4: how you do things and how you navigate things. And 450 00:23:02,440 --> 00:23:05,760 Speaker 4: so as you were talking about security, one of the 451 00:23:05,800 --> 00:23:08,040 Speaker 4: other things that I thought about was like your social 452 00:23:08,080 --> 00:23:12,199 Speaker 4: media presence. How you know, people like to come at 453 00:23:12,280 --> 00:23:15,560 Speaker 4: us in social media because they have that space of 454 00:23:15,600 --> 00:23:20,920 Speaker 4: that anonymity and not having to do it in person. 455 00:23:21,359 --> 00:23:24,000 Speaker 4: And so I was wondering, how have you tried to 456 00:23:24,080 --> 00:23:28,480 Speaker 4: maintain one an active social media presence and then two, 457 00:23:29,160 --> 00:23:34,080 Speaker 4: how do you safeguard from people coming into like maybe 458 00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:37,320 Speaker 4: spew negativity or hatred or anything like that. 459 00:23:38,160 --> 00:23:40,800 Speaker 3: Mm hmmm. Yeah, So something that has really helped me. 460 00:23:41,680 --> 00:23:44,520 Speaker 3: So one of the very first person that I hired 461 00:23:44,840 --> 00:23:49,200 Speaker 3: for Therapy for Black Girls was my community manager, because 462 00:23:49,520 --> 00:23:52,720 Speaker 3: I really feel like the community around Therapy for Black 463 00:23:52,760 --> 00:23:56,240 Speaker 3: Girls is really what is most important and what really 464 00:23:56,320 --> 00:23:58,440 Speaker 3: allows the business to flourish. And so it was really 465 00:23:58,480 --> 00:24:00,919 Speaker 3: important for me to have somebody in place from the 466 00:24:00,960 --> 00:24:03,360 Speaker 3: beginning or as soon as possible, to kind of really 467 00:24:03,359 --> 00:24:06,399 Speaker 3: be paying attention to how the community flows, how people 468 00:24:06,440 --> 00:24:09,840 Speaker 3: engage with one another. And so she does an amazing job, 469 00:24:10,200 --> 00:24:11,800 Speaker 3: and she helps out a lot with all of the 470 00:24:11,840 --> 00:24:16,560 Speaker 3: social media and so, you know, if there are negative comments, 471 00:24:16,600 --> 00:24:20,560 Speaker 3: then she spends time deleting or rerouting and redirecting people. 472 00:24:21,200 --> 00:24:24,520 Speaker 3: But we honestly don't have a ton of that. You know, 473 00:24:24,600 --> 00:24:26,639 Speaker 3: every now and then there would be like some random 474 00:24:26,640 --> 00:24:29,120 Speaker 3: person who will kind of, you know, say whatever. But 475 00:24:29,240 --> 00:24:34,320 Speaker 3: mostly the community and the energy around the podcast and 476 00:24:34,359 --> 00:24:37,359 Speaker 3: the directory and all of those things are overwhelmingly positive. 477 00:24:37,600 --> 00:24:39,360 Speaker 3: But we do have some things in place to kind 478 00:24:39,359 --> 00:24:42,720 Speaker 3: of manage that, you know, if we need to. And 479 00:24:42,760 --> 00:24:46,120 Speaker 3: so having that additional like layer, I think is really 480 00:24:46,119 --> 00:24:48,560 Speaker 3: helpful for me that I'm not the one who's engaging 481 00:24:48,560 --> 00:24:51,679 Speaker 3: with all of that, because in the very beginning it 482 00:24:51,880 --> 00:24:54,640 Speaker 3: was me, and it felt like a lot to consume 483 00:24:54,880 --> 00:24:57,480 Speaker 3: because I'm like paying attention to this, and I'm also 484 00:24:57,560 --> 00:25:00,320 Speaker 3: like paying attention to what's happening on the podcast week 485 00:25:00,359 --> 00:25:01,800 Speaker 3: and what am I going to talk about in the 486 00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:04,320 Speaker 3: video this week? Like that is still very much the 487 00:25:04,400 --> 00:25:06,919 Speaker 3: thing that I'm doing, and so paying attention to all 488 00:25:06,960 --> 00:25:09,560 Speaker 3: of that can can be a lot. So having Jasmine 489 00:25:10,080 --> 00:25:12,200 Speaker 3: is the name of our community manager, having heard there 490 00:25:12,240 --> 00:25:14,240 Speaker 3: to do a lot of that has been really helpful. 491 00:25:14,600 --> 00:25:16,399 Speaker 3: And every now and then I will also get like 492 00:25:16,480 --> 00:25:19,359 Speaker 3: these random emails from people right like that feel the 493 00:25:19,440 --> 00:25:22,439 Speaker 3: need to like say something negative or harmful, and so 494 00:25:23,119 --> 00:25:25,840 Speaker 3: you know, like I of course am human, so I 495 00:25:25,840 --> 00:25:29,200 Speaker 3: can get sucked into it briefly to kind of be like, oh, wow, 496 00:25:29,320 --> 00:25:32,800 Speaker 3: this person really missed, you know, misunderstood what I said 497 00:25:32,880 --> 00:25:35,680 Speaker 3: or whatever. But I also keep a file of all 498 00:25:35,720 --> 00:25:37,760 Speaker 3: of the positive things that people say to me, and 499 00:25:37,840 --> 00:25:40,440 Speaker 3: so when I get pulled into one of these kind 500 00:25:40,440 --> 00:25:42,399 Speaker 3: of like oh they didn't get me, or this person 501 00:25:42,400 --> 00:25:45,879 Speaker 3: doesn't feel positively about us or whatever, then I reroute 502 00:25:45,880 --> 00:25:49,000 Speaker 3: that to this folder on my computer with all of 503 00:25:49,040 --> 00:25:51,200 Speaker 3: the positive things that people have said, because I think 504 00:25:51,240 --> 00:25:54,399 Speaker 3: it's really easy to get overwhelmed and sucked into like 505 00:25:54,440 --> 00:25:57,879 Speaker 3: this one negative review of the podcast or whatever and 506 00:25:57,960 --> 00:26:00,959 Speaker 3: miss the fifty other pieces of content in our emails 507 00:26:01,080 --> 00:26:03,800 Speaker 3: or messages from people who have talked about how the 508 00:26:03,800 --> 00:26:06,680 Speaker 3: platform has really changed their lives. So that has been 509 00:26:06,720 --> 00:26:09,119 Speaker 3: really helpful for me to kind of redirect my energy 510 00:26:09,160 --> 00:26:09,679 Speaker 3: as well. 511 00:26:10,400 --> 00:26:12,639 Speaker 2: That is a pro tip, right there, ladies, So start 512 00:26:12,680 --> 00:26:16,440 Speaker 2: your folder and your email with inspirational emails. You can 513 00:26:16,800 --> 00:26:18,800 Speaker 2: refer to them on a bad day. Right, that's a 514 00:26:18,840 --> 00:26:19,359 Speaker 2: really good pa. 515 00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:22,280 Speaker 3: Yes, yes, now. 516 00:26:22,119 --> 00:26:24,399 Speaker 2: Doctor Joy. We have a segment on our show, a 517 00:26:24,520 --> 00:26:27,520 Speaker 2: very special segment for our guests, and it's called oh 518 00:26:27,560 --> 00:26:29,600 Speaker 2: you clatch It. I'm going to explain it to you. 519 00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:33,960 Speaker 2: So we recognize and appreciate and celebrate the multifaceted woman, 520 00:26:34,320 --> 00:26:36,959 Speaker 2: and we believe that it's okay to be classy and 521 00:26:37,160 --> 00:26:39,320 Speaker 2: ratchet and you can still be elegant and dance to 522 00:26:39,359 --> 00:26:41,720 Speaker 2: strip club music if you so choose. We want to 523 00:26:41,720 --> 00:26:44,320 Speaker 2: invite you to the oh you clatch It segment when 524 00:26:44,320 --> 00:26:46,600 Speaker 2: we ask a few questions, and it's going to be 525 00:26:46,680 --> 00:26:48,760 Speaker 2: kind of like a rapid fire situation here, so we 526 00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:51,960 Speaker 2: want to know do you take on the challenge? I do, 527 00:26:52,560 --> 00:26:55,920 Speaker 2: all right, all right, So first question for you, which 528 00:26:56,000 --> 00:26:58,600 Speaker 2: song gets you on the dance floor at the club 529 00:26:58,760 --> 00:27:00,120 Speaker 2: or party? 530 00:27:00,720 --> 00:27:11,119 Speaker 3: Bag that thing up unquestionably exactly, and then b drop 531 00:27:11,680 --> 00:27:17,480 Speaker 3: it's a spiritual moment, I feel like, yes, yes, no 532 00:27:17,520 --> 00:27:20,720 Speaker 3: matter where you are, No matter where you are. 533 00:27:20,880 --> 00:27:25,119 Speaker 4: You could be in the car, in the grocery store, wherever. 534 00:27:25,880 --> 00:27:34,800 Speaker 2: It does you question, what's your favorite hairstyle on yourself? 535 00:27:36,119 --> 00:27:39,200 Speaker 3: Oh, so I love my fro, but the fro can 536 00:27:39,240 --> 00:27:41,800 Speaker 3: be very unpredictable, and you know she doesn't always want 537 00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:44,719 Speaker 3: to cooperate, so that is probably my favorite, but not 538 00:27:44,760 --> 00:27:47,719 Speaker 3: always low maintenance. So like if I'm looking for just 539 00:27:47,760 --> 00:27:49,840 Speaker 3: like something quick, then I would say a butN. 540 00:27:51,040 --> 00:27:55,160 Speaker 2: Yep, I can totally. I can totally empathize with that one. 541 00:27:56,880 --> 00:27:59,880 Speaker 2: What about the best compliment you've ever received? 542 00:28:01,640 --> 00:28:07,600 Speaker 3: I don't even know. I get lots of emails from 543 00:28:07,640 --> 00:28:11,040 Speaker 3: people who like started therapy because they like heard something 544 00:28:11,040 --> 00:28:13,560 Speaker 3: on the podcast or they found the therapist in the directory, 545 00:28:13,960 --> 00:28:16,880 Speaker 3: and that I think are always the best compliments. 546 00:28:17,440 --> 00:28:18,560 Speaker 2: That's pretty incredible. 547 00:28:20,359 --> 00:28:24,399 Speaker 4: Is really validating the work that you do and the 548 00:28:24,400 --> 00:28:27,680 Speaker 4: the inspiration and the impact. 549 00:28:27,200 --> 00:28:27,880 Speaker 3: That you have on. 550 00:28:29,440 --> 00:28:32,280 Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree in our community, Like it takes a 551 00:28:32,280 --> 00:28:34,040 Speaker 2: lot for you to take that step. So you're listening 552 00:28:34,040 --> 00:28:35,400 Speaker 2: to a podcast and you're like, you know what, I'm 553 00:28:35,400 --> 00:28:38,120 Speaker 2: going to actually make this life changing decision to see 554 00:28:38,160 --> 00:28:38,800 Speaker 2: God A therapist. 555 00:28:38,840 --> 00:28:40,240 Speaker 3: That's huge, awesome. 556 00:28:41,160 --> 00:28:43,320 Speaker 2: So our next question for you is who's your bad 557 00:28:43,400 --> 00:28:46,640 Speaker 2: boy or bad girl crush. Usually it's a celebrity, but 558 00:28:46,680 --> 00:28:47,960 Speaker 2: whoever that person might be for you. 559 00:28:49,640 --> 00:28:53,480 Speaker 3: Ooh and we know you're up on the podcast. Yeah, 560 00:28:53,480 --> 00:28:56,600 Speaker 3: I'm trying to think of Michael. I'm trying to think 561 00:28:56,640 --> 00:28:59,120 Speaker 3: of like a crush. I don't necessarily know that it's 562 00:28:59,160 --> 00:29:01,760 Speaker 3: a crush, but I'm like a huge, big The Stallion 563 00:29:01,920 --> 00:29:05,560 Speaker 3: fan right now, just because I mean, you know she, 564 00:29:05,760 --> 00:29:08,160 Speaker 3: I feel like it's just giving us a moment all 565 00:29:08,200 --> 00:29:10,240 Speaker 3: of the summer about with the hot girl summer and 566 00:29:10,280 --> 00:29:13,720 Speaker 3: like living your life and doing you unapologetically. So I'm 567 00:29:13,720 --> 00:29:15,840 Speaker 3: a huge fan of her right now for sure. And 568 00:29:15,880 --> 00:29:17,240 Speaker 3: she's an amazing rapper too. 569 00:29:17,960 --> 00:29:23,760 Speaker 4: Yes, and so okay, so speaking of music, twerk or 570 00:29:23,800 --> 00:29:27,520 Speaker 4: two steps? 571 00:29:27,520 --> 00:29:30,080 Speaker 3: Probably a two step okay, okay. 572 00:29:32,760 --> 00:29:35,040 Speaker 4: And then to switch it up just a little bit, 573 00:29:36,280 --> 00:29:37,480 Speaker 4: what's your favorite book? 574 00:29:39,280 --> 00:29:44,800 Speaker 3: Oh, that's a good one. I don't know. I read. 575 00:29:45,080 --> 00:29:46,920 Speaker 3: I read quite a few, but I don't I don't 576 00:29:46,960 --> 00:29:50,160 Speaker 3: necessarily go back to any So I'm trying to think 577 00:29:50,160 --> 00:29:54,840 Speaker 3: of one that really grabbed a hold of me. I'm 578 00:29:54,840 --> 00:29:59,440 Speaker 3: not sure I'm blanking, but right now, I'm reading the Shortened, Tragic, 579 00:29:59,600 --> 00:30:03,640 Speaker 3: Tragic Life of Robert Peth, and that one is definitely 580 00:30:03,640 --> 00:30:07,440 Speaker 3: a very compelling story. I'm definitely finding myself lost in 581 00:30:07,520 --> 00:30:09,560 Speaker 3: that one, so I would have to say that right now. 582 00:30:10,280 --> 00:30:12,880 Speaker 4: Okay, And you said the short and Tragic Life of 583 00:30:13,360 --> 00:30:14,000 Speaker 4: Robert Peace. 584 00:30:14,880 --> 00:30:15,960 Speaker 3: Uh huh Okay. 585 00:30:15,960 --> 00:30:18,160 Speaker 4: We will definitely add that to our show notes so 586 00:30:18,200 --> 00:30:21,040 Speaker 4: that our listeners can take that one in as well. 587 00:30:21,800 --> 00:30:26,640 Speaker 4: Our last question, what's something many people don't know about you? 588 00:30:29,040 --> 00:30:31,719 Speaker 3: I think a lot of people probably wouldn't know like 589 00:30:31,880 --> 00:30:35,720 Speaker 3: how techy I am. So you know, like I said before, 590 00:30:35,760 --> 00:30:38,880 Speaker 3: I like found developers to hire to work on the site. 591 00:30:39,040 --> 00:30:41,600 Speaker 3: I was managing a lot of it myself, so I 592 00:30:41,760 --> 00:30:44,080 Speaker 3: really always kind of love to kind of get in 593 00:30:44,160 --> 00:30:48,200 Speaker 3: the behind the scenes ideas of like how things work, 594 00:30:48,240 --> 00:30:50,600 Speaker 3: and like how do these platforms that we love so 595 00:30:50,680 --> 00:30:53,400 Speaker 3: much work and with the technology and the science behind that. 596 00:30:54,080 --> 00:30:56,520 Speaker 3: So I think that's probably something people don't necessarily know 597 00:30:56,560 --> 00:30:57,000 Speaker 3: about me. 598 00:30:58,440 --> 00:31:03,360 Speaker 2: I've got some black girl magic here. Well, doctor Joy. 599 00:31:03,440 --> 00:31:05,320 Speaker 2: We want to thank you so much for your time 600 00:31:05,520 --> 00:31:09,400 Speaker 2: and for your insight and just offering your spirit to 601 00:31:09,440 --> 00:31:12,480 Speaker 2: our listeners, and we want to know we want to 602 00:31:12,560 --> 00:31:14,280 Speaker 2: leave them with where they can find you on social 603 00:31:14,360 --> 00:31:17,000 Speaker 2: media and also what's next for you and your brand. 604 00:31:18,320 --> 00:31:20,960 Speaker 3: Yeah, so you can find us on Therapy for Blackgirls 605 00:31:20,960 --> 00:31:23,600 Speaker 3: dot com. That's the website where you'll find the podcast, 606 00:31:23,680 --> 00:31:26,560 Speaker 3: the directory, all of our blog posts, and all of 607 00:31:26,600 --> 00:31:28,800 Speaker 3: our social media and if you want to follow me 608 00:31:28,920 --> 00:31:31,800 Speaker 3: personally then you can find me all across all of 609 00:31:31,840 --> 00:31:35,800 Speaker 3: the platforms at Hallo doctor Joy. Coming up next, we 610 00:31:35,920 --> 00:31:40,160 Speaker 3: will be working on some live events. So the community 611 00:31:40,200 --> 00:31:42,760 Speaker 3: has been begging and pleading for like some kind of 612 00:31:42,800 --> 00:31:45,040 Speaker 3: event where they can meet other people, meet some of 613 00:31:45,080 --> 00:31:47,600 Speaker 3: the people that they have conversations with in our Facebook 614 00:31:47,640 --> 00:31:51,360 Speaker 3: group and on our ig channel. So we will be 615 00:31:51,400 --> 00:31:55,480 Speaker 3: working on some live events for Therapy for Black Girls Amazing. 616 00:31:55,520 --> 00:31:57,640 Speaker 2: Well, please keep us posted so we can come to 617 00:31:57,640 --> 00:31:59,640 Speaker 2: those events and also share it with our community. That 618 00:31:59,720 --> 00:32:02,000 Speaker 2: is so exciting and again we want to thank you 619 00:32:02,040 --> 00:32:03,040 Speaker 2: so much for your time. 620 00:32:04,080 --> 00:32:07,000 Speaker 3: Thank you guys, I appreciate you. 621 00:32:06,640 --> 00:32:11,440 Speaker 4: Thanks for joining us today in her space. Please note 622 00:32:11,560 --> 00:32:15,520 Speaker 4: that our show may contain conversations about self help, advice, 623 00:32:15,920 --> 00:32:19,000 Speaker 4: self empowerment, and mental health, but it is by no 624 00:32:19,200 --> 00:32:22,960 Speaker 4: means meant to be a substitute for an ongoing formal relationship. 625 00:32:23,000 --> 00:32:26,800 Speaker 4: With a trained mental health provider. If you or someone 626 00:32:26,880 --> 00:32:29,719 Speaker 4: you know is in need of mental health care, please 627 00:32:29,800 --> 00:32:34,800 Speaker 4: visit the Therapeople Black Girls Directory Psychology today or contact 628 00:32:34,840 --> 00:32:36,000 Speaker 4: your insurance provider. 629 00:32:37,200 --> 00:32:39,320 Speaker 2: If you liked what you heard and want to keep 630 00:32:39,320 --> 00:32:44,080 Speaker 2: the conversation going, connect with us on Facebook, Instagram, and 631 00:32:44,200 --> 00:32:49,960 Speaker 2: Twitter at her space podcast or check out our website 632 00:32:50,000 --> 00:32:54,800 Speaker 2: at herspacepodcast dot com. And before we meet again, repeat 633 00:32:54,880 --> 00:32:58,800 Speaker 2: after me, I will not judge myself for where I'm starting. 634 00:32:59,280 --> 00:33:01,120 Speaker 2: I'm making day. 635 00:33:01,320 --> 00:33:04,800 Speaker 4: Thanks for joining us. We'll see you next week, Lady