WEBVTT - We've Been Dating Wrong 0:00:03.040 --> 0:00:07.000 We're just two unapologetically black women with an opinion. He 0:00:07.240 --> 0:00:12.120 talks back, what's up, y'all, thank you for tuning in 0:00:12.160 --> 0:00:15.600 for a new episode or week? What you need some 0:00:15.960 --> 0:00:18.239 warm on? They're nothing I could do, ain't nothing I 0:00:18.239 --> 0:00:20.680 can do? Is not a wait. This is just the 0:00:20.760 --> 0:00:26.120 voice they're gonna get. Okay, everybody, it's me A J. Holiday. 0:00:27.960 --> 0:00:33.199 That's your regular voice, granny, Miss Helen. I was just 0:00:33.240 --> 0:00:37.760 talking about talking about your voice. Uh my girl, scouts lady. 0:00:37.840 --> 0:00:43.240 Her name was Miss Helen. Y'all sound exactly alike Miss Helen. 0:00:43.280 --> 0:00:45.480 I'm gonna call you Miss Helen going forward. Bitch, don't 0:00:45.520 --> 0:00:50.960 do this. Hey, y'all tell me talking about my morning voice. 0:00:51.000 --> 0:00:55.200 She got me up early as fuck. So here we are. Okay, 0:00:55.280 --> 0:00:57.400 So thank you guys for tuning in for a new episode. 0:00:57.440 --> 0:00:59.520 And we talked back to show dedicated to you niggas 0:00:59.520 --> 0:01:03.000 and these home. It's your co host, A J. Holiday. 0:01:03.160 --> 0:01:06.800 I said, damn, oh the deal you y'all? This has 0:01:06.840 --> 0:01:11.520 been It's nine o'clock, y'all. It's been staring as early 0:01:11.600 --> 0:01:15.559 as fuck. I don't be talking this early in the morning. 0:01:16.560 --> 0:01:18.400 But I don't be talking you know how that go? 0:01:19.080 --> 0:01:22.360 She got me earliest. It's all nine o'clock, about to 0:01:22.360 --> 0:01:28.760 be lunching a little while frog Man, Hey, y'all's be 0:01:28.880 --> 0:01:31.800 tim bam. I love y'all. Thank y'all for tuning in again, 0:01:32.319 --> 0:01:34.679 A j A, thank you for joining me so early 0:01:34.760 --> 0:01:40.280 in the morning. Whatever, How how is our weekend? Bit? 0:01:40.440 --> 0:01:42.200 What you mean? We was the game? Now? We was 0:01:42.280 --> 0:01:48.480 together again? Wends y'all. We went to see Um. It 0:01:48.560 --> 0:01:52.240 was Dave Chappelle and Chris Rock and Donnelle Rollins. Niggas 0:01:52.280 --> 0:01:55.120 was so funny. It was so hilarious. I wish I 0:01:55.160 --> 0:01:57.920 could have recorded it by my phone, but they took 0:01:58.000 --> 0:02:00.440 my phone and made us put it in a little 0:02:00.520 --> 0:02:03.080 case that was locked, so I couldn't record the footage. 0:02:03.120 --> 0:02:05.760 Because I swear I probably would have recorded the whole 0:02:05.760 --> 0:02:10.840 show social media, right. The funniest part is when Dottie 0:02:10.960 --> 0:02:13.119 Rollins that nigger was like, I had just said this ship. 0:02:13.200 --> 0:02:15.360 I leaned over to my home girl. I was like, um, 0:02:15.440 --> 0:02:17.720 should everybody phone locked? I'm not as gonna be talking 0:02:17.760 --> 0:02:21.680 helly ship. As soon as I said that, that nigga said, yeah, y'all, crackers, 0:02:21.720 --> 0:02:28.680 phone locked up. Crack crack crack cracker. Yes he was 0:02:28.800 --> 0:02:32.359 definitely cutting up. I love a lot of Yeah, everybody 0:02:32.400 --> 0:02:35.440 was funny. I can't it's smart to make us locker 0:02:35.520 --> 0:02:39.000 phones because I can't remember not a single joke that 0:02:39.080 --> 0:02:41.040 I laughed at. I know I was like holding my 0:02:41.080 --> 0:02:43.560 gut laughing, but I can't remember nothing of Nigga said. 0:02:44.360 --> 0:02:46.640 I couldn't. I couldn't retail the joke right now for 0:02:46.680 --> 0:02:49.560 you at all. But just know that Chris Rock went 0:02:49.680 --> 0:02:52.959 in on Will's Smith. Oh my goodness, he did about 0:02:53.000 --> 0:02:55.840 twenty five minutes. If y'all have an opportunity and you 0:02:55.880 --> 0:02:58.280 see this tour coming through your city, you probably should go. 0:02:58.320 --> 0:03:02.120 That was That's that. Charleston was the last stop. It 0:03:02.160 --> 0:03:05.960 was only a five show tour. Oh no, my, I 0:03:06.000 --> 0:03:08.079 gotta catch it on I don't know HBO Max And 0:03:08.720 --> 0:03:11.200 that was recording it, so it's probably gonna become available 0:03:11.400 --> 0:03:16.200 to you soon. Yeah. That was a good weekend. It 0:03:16.320 --> 0:03:19.760 was outside from Thursday to Sunday. My body was out 0:03:19.840 --> 0:03:24.040 on something, bitch. It wasn't even karaoke that I was 0:03:24.080 --> 0:03:27.760 grabbing the mic and then people club. Every time I 0:03:27.840 --> 0:03:29.480 go to the club, like, man, let me get the mic. 0:03:30.280 --> 0:03:32.800 Why I travel with one? Because motherfucker's be stingy with 0:03:32.840 --> 0:03:36.360 the mic I don't get at you, Djen. Sunday, my 0:03:36.360 --> 0:03:38.920 my best friend had her gender real veal from my 0:03:39.040 --> 0:03:43.040 new guy baby and it's a boy, y'all. So babe, uh, 0:03:43.480 --> 0:03:45.600 y'all come to my instagram, y'all see that picture. Just 0:03:45.920 --> 0:03:48.280 put a little baby, a blue baby, not a blue baby, 0:03:48.320 --> 0:03:50.200 a blue heart and a baby, and there show me 0:03:50.240 --> 0:03:52.400 some love for my new guy baby. This probably might 0:03:52.400 --> 0:03:55.760 be closest I get your having babies, I think, so 0:03:55.800 --> 0:03:58.600 I'm grateful for them. I'm grateful for her. So that 0:03:58.760 --> 0:04:01.840 was my Sunday. Oh no, no, no, that's not all. 0:04:01.920 --> 0:04:07.640 Then after the the gender reveal, we went to see 0:04:07.840 --> 0:04:10.720 um oops Oo's had a comedy show. I'm not know 0:04:10.760 --> 0:04:13.440 if you're all familiar with him. He's really funny. Went 0:04:13.480 --> 0:04:15.440 to see him in Charlotte and he's done quite a 0:04:15.440 --> 0:04:19.720 few things, so y'all look for him, my boy. That 0:04:19.800 --> 0:04:22.200 was my weekend. Let's get in this stupid internet news. 0:04:22.240 --> 0:04:26.520 What is the sins of this past week? Well, the 0:04:26.560 --> 0:04:32.719 biggest since um, the unfortunate you know, passing of Tyree 0:04:32.800 --> 0:04:38.280 nichols Um. The incident actually took place on January the seventh, 0:04:38.320 --> 0:04:42.000 I believe, but he actually passed away on January tenth, 0:04:43.040 --> 0:04:48.640 and since then, there's been five officers arrested, and I 0:04:48.680 --> 0:04:52.240 think they're contemplating arresting the sixth office officer. The five 0:04:52.360 --> 0:04:59.400 five black officers arrested essentially for the lynching. I'm Tyree Nichols. UM. 0:04:59.440 --> 0:05:01.159 I don't know what they thought the outcome was going 0:05:01.200 --> 0:05:04.240 to be. I didn't watch the video, did you? No? 0:05:04.360 --> 0:05:08.720 I don't. I don't like the consume things of that nature. No, 0:05:09.000 --> 0:05:10.880 it's not a movie. This is a real person. I 0:05:10.920 --> 0:05:13.080 don't want to see that. And I'm blocking anybody that 0:05:13.120 --> 0:05:16.760 sends that ship to my phone or Instagram. I swear 0:05:16.839 --> 0:05:20.120 for God, oh block you, but I'll let you know, 0:05:20.200 --> 0:05:24.359 like that's just not my particular aesthetic that I like 0:05:24.480 --> 0:05:27.680 to consume. So please don't send me that because I'll 0:05:27.720 --> 0:05:31.279 carry it with me forever. So I can't handle it. 0:05:31.839 --> 0:05:35.440 So police on Friday this past Friday released more than 0:05:35.760 --> 0:05:40.240 an hour worth of footage showing the deadly confrontation on 0:05:40.360 --> 0:05:44.520 January the seven between twenty nine year old Tyree Nichols 0:05:44.560 --> 0:05:49.080 and the officers of Memphis Police Department. UM. He died 0:05:49.160 --> 0:05:52.320 three days later after just a normal traffic stop that 0:05:52.400 --> 0:05:55.960 turned into a homicide essentially, And to me, it took 0:05:56.000 --> 0:06:00.040 no time for these guys to be arrested, losing of 0:06:00.200 --> 0:06:02.600 jobs all that ship, whereas we have to march with 0:06:02.720 --> 0:06:05.560 the streets when it's a you know, a white officer 0:06:06.240 --> 0:06:09.679 in a black victim. But this is two birds one stone. 0:06:09.720 --> 0:06:12.080 At this point, I find it kind of awkward that 0:06:12.360 --> 0:06:16.400 five excuse me, four of the five officers are q dogs. 0:06:16.440 --> 0:06:19.120 So the thing is is that you you haven't heard 0:06:19.160 --> 0:06:24.120 of uh mob mentality? M Like it only takes one 0:06:24.320 --> 0:06:27.520 out the bunch to activate the others. So like, just 0:06:27.520 --> 0:06:30.120 think of a pack of wolves. They have a leader. 0:06:30.400 --> 0:06:33.400 So when the leader does something, it's like something happens 0:06:33.520 --> 0:06:36.720 in the rest of these Yes, so it's not like 0:06:36.800 --> 0:06:39.520 somebody has to even verbally say, hey, beat his ass. 0:06:39.680 --> 0:06:43.760 It's like, uh, some type of I don't know, um, 0:06:43.960 --> 0:06:50.320 possession essentially, because what would possess y'all do this horrific 0:06:50.480 --> 0:06:54.160 crime to another black man, brother, to your brother. And 0:06:54.200 --> 0:06:57.560 that's the thing, um, Because there's a Tarree Nichols in 0:06:57.640 --> 0:07:01.760 every neighborhood every day. When are we gonna start seeing 0:07:01.760 --> 0:07:05.000 each other as see you as my brother, see you 0:07:05.080 --> 0:07:08.760 as my sister? What happened and what happened with the 0:07:08.760 --> 0:07:12.080 white officer on site? So where y'all showing off for him? 0:07:12.160 --> 0:07:14.800 And you know, they locked him up fast. But I'm 0:07:14.840 --> 0:07:17.480 okay with that. I'm not okay with them not locking 0:07:17.560 --> 0:07:21.360 up the white officers quickly do the same, keep the 0:07:21.480 --> 0:07:24.960 same energy. But y'all beat the dogshit out of this 0:07:25.400 --> 0:07:29.880 your brother on the street to death, lock him up. 0:07:30.160 --> 0:07:33.239 So each was charged with one count of second degree murder, 0:07:33.280 --> 0:07:38.120 two counts of official misconduct, one count of official oppression, 0:07:38.600 --> 0:07:43.560 one count of aggravated assault while acting in concert uh, 0:07:43.600 --> 0:07:48.000 and two counts of aggravated kidnapping, and the death of Nichols, 0:07:48.000 --> 0:07:52.440 according to Shelby County Sheriff's Sheriff's Office, So he tried 0:07:52.480 --> 0:07:55.200 to run, like your body is gonna kick into fight 0:07:55.280 --> 0:07:58.920 or flight. You physically, one black man a hundred forty 0:07:58.960 --> 0:08:04.360 five pounds six cannot beat these big football player looking dudes. 0:08:05.360 --> 0:08:08.360 It's impossible. So he ran, and you can hear them. 0:08:08.400 --> 0:08:11.400 I did hear some of the audio saying, UH, don't 0:08:11.400 --> 0:08:13.840 make us chase you. So y'all made I had to 0:08:13.880 --> 0:08:16.920 do some physical activity on the job. I don't understand. 0:08:16.960 --> 0:08:19.480 And then so now the next thing that pissed me off. 0:08:19.560 --> 0:08:24.000 Involving this case is Jason Whitlock. Um. He's a media 0:08:24.120 --> 0:08:27.520 uh commentator. He used to work for the Fox Sports 0:08:28.200 --> 0:08:32.840 uh MSNBC. I believe also black man. Okay, that's all. 0:08:33.400 --> 0:08:37.160 So the things that he had to say about this 0:08:37.240 --> 0:08:41.079 case and black women, because for whatever reason, this day 0:08:41.080 --> 0:08:45.080 and time, we get blamed for every fucking thing. So 0:08:45.520 --> 0:08:48.120 the disparaging things he had to say about black women, 0:08:48.240 --> 0:08:50.679 like I wish I could smack his ass. I swear 0:08:50.679 --> 0:08:56.040 to God his his face on his ass. I probably 0:08:56.040 --> 0:08:59.600 shoot him in the ass. How about that? Don't shoot 0:08:59.720 --> 0:09:02.280 to That's the problem. Black on black violence is the problem. 0:09:02.760 --> 0:09:05.120 Let me tell you, but I am violence. We just 0:09:05.120 --> 0:09:11.040 need to listen. Violence is necessary sometimes, you know what 0:09:11.080 --> 0:09:13.920 I'm saying. Violence is necessary Sometimes a lot of times 0:09:14.000 --> 0:09:18.839 change don't come without violence. Unfortunately, on this realm mm hmm, 0:09:19.679 --> 0:09:23.079 it's necessary. Sometimes. I don't think that people should be 0:09:23.120 --> 0:09:24.559 able to say and do what the funk they want 0:09:24.559 --> 0:09:27.240 to do. Period. There has to be law and order. 0:09:27.960 --> 0:09:31.760 And as a black man to publicly disparage black women, 0:09:31.840 --> 0:09:33.800 I'm sick and tired of that ship. I'm sick and 0:09:33.840 --> 0:09:37.439 tired of it. So he was like there's a racial element. Um, 0:09:37.480 --> 0:09:40.560 and this story about young black men and their inability 0:09:40.640 --> 0:09:42.880 to treat each other in a humane way. I agree 0:09:42.920 --> 0:09:46.560 with everybody involved in this on the street level was 0:09:46.600 --> 0:09:50.040 either twenty four to thirty two years old. Everybody. It 0:09:50.160 --> 0:09:52.720 was a group of young black men five o one. 0:09:53.080 --> 0:09:59.040 Looked like gang violence. To me, I can agree. So 0:09:59.080 --> 0:10:01.480 he goes on to say, um, it looked like what 0:10:01.559 --> 0:10:05.960 young black men do when they're supervised by single black women. 0:10:06.679 --> 0:10:09.880 And that's what they got going on in Memphis in 0:10:09.880 --> 0:10:14.000 the Memphis police department. They've elected some or put some 0:10:14.280 --> 0:10:17.480 black woman in charge of the police force, and we're 0:10:17.520 --> 0:10:20.440 getting the same kind of chaos and this unity and 0:10:20.520 --> 0:10:22.920 violence that we see in a lot of our cities 0:10:23.280 --> 0:10:28.280 ran by single mothers. Black man black is so unfair. 0:10:28.559 --> 0:10:32.560 That is so unfair to all of this on black 0:10:32.600 --> 0:10:37.560 single mothers. Wow, because we make ourselves single mothers. You know, 0:10:37.679 --> 0:10:40.640 black men are literally out here creating single mothers. And 0:10:40.679 --> 0:10:43.160 I'm not gonna say all because I'm coming to find 0:10:43.160 --> 0:10:45.600 that there's a lot of black men that don't have children. 0:10:46.160 --> 0:10:49.440 So it may be that women are having children with 0:10:49.600 --> 0:10:52.800 men who already have children, right, because there are a 0:10:52.880 --> 0:10:55.680 lot of single black men who don't have kids, But 0:10:55.840 --> 0:10:58.920 to put the onus on black women alone, as if 0:10:59.080 --> 0:11:04.040 we're making ourselves baby mamas. I understand baby mama culture 0:11:04.120 --> 0:11:06.640 is it's it's a nasty thing, and it's something that's 0:11:06.640 --> 0:11:10.679 almost damn has celebrated in the Black community. I wish 0:11:10.679 --> 0:11:13.960 it would be abolished. But we are having these children 0:11:14.000 --> 0:11:18.040 by ourselves, Like women are choosing to stay in the homes. 0:11:18.840 --> 0:11:21.800 Men make the choice to leave the homes. It's not 0:11:21.920 --> 0:11:24.199 the women. I don't even think the women have much 0:11:24.240 --> 0:11:29.160 of a choice. Yes, they're gonna be daddy maybe right 0:11:29.200 --> 0:11:32.840 what they're gonna do. Yeah, So Sierra took to um 0:11:33.160 --> 0:11:37.360 Twitter and she added him it says, as a black man, 0:11:37.480 --> 0:11:40.520 to get on national TV and say something like this 0:11:40.640 --> 0:11:43.760 is irresponsible. A lot of amazing kids have come from 0:11:43.800 --> 0:11:47.200 singer mothers. For you to also undermine single black women 0:11:47.240 --> 0:11:49.880 in the midst of a tragedy is so sad. This 0:11:49.920 --> 0:11:54.080 woman just lost her son. Do better, he responds to Sierra. 0:11:54.160 --> 0:11:57.160 Jason Whitlocke responds to Sierra and says, I appreciate the 0:11:57.200 --> 0:12:00.079 feedbacks here, but at some point we are going to 0:12:00.200 --> 0:12:02.920 have to deal with the negative impact of baby mama culture. 0:12:03.280 --> 0:12:07.480 It's destructive and unsustainable. Come up out of the nile. 0:12:07.679 --> 0:12:11.160 The nile won't fix the problem. Thanks, But first of all, 0:12:11.200 --> 0:12:13.760 how did you know that these men come from single mothers? 0:12:13.800 --> 0:12:16.440 You don't know exactly. He's literally talked about the chief 0:12:16.440 --> 0:12:20.720 of police being a woman, right, that's what he's saying. Essentially, 0:12:20.800 --> 0:12:25.040 you don't know these these people's background because they went 0:12:25.040 --> 0:12:30.319 to college. Okay, the college educated black men who stole 0:12:30.400 --> 0:12:32.160 chose to do this stupid ship. You don't know what 0:12:32.240 --> 0:12:34.880 type of household they came from, right, And that's the 0:12:35.480 --> 0:12:37.920 woman who runs the police force is not their mother. 0:12:38.320 --> 0:12:41.120 That's not their mama. She's doing a job that doesn't 0:12:41.120 --> 0:12:44.000 make her incapable because she's a woman. That's what it 0:12:44.000 --> 0:12:46.280 sounds like to me, as if this ship doesn't happen 0:12:46.360 --> 0:12:49.559 under the watch of black men, white or white men 0:12:49.800 --> 0:12:53.920 or anybody, Like, what are you talking about? Yeah, he's ignorant. Yeah, 0:12:54.559 --> 0:12:57.360 that's very ignorant. I just wish that if you don't 0:12:57.360 --> 0:13:00.920 have anything encouraging to say, say to funk off TV 0:13:02.040 --> 0:13:04.560 and then you're having this conversation in mixed company, is 0:13:04.600 --> 0:13:08.360 wow to me, Like it sends a message like everything 0:13:08.400 --> 0:13:12.160 bad in the black community blame black women, and I 0:13:12.200 --> 0:13:15.880 feel like we get blamed for the majority of the 0:13:15.960 --> 0:13:18.120 things that happen in our community, and some of the 0:13:18.160 --> 0:13:20.440 stuff I can agree with, because when we do set 0:13:20.480 --> 0:13:24.040 the standard and you have children out here being raised 0:13:24.320 --> 0:13:29.000 by the unraised, it still boils down to just broken families. 0:13:29.320 --> 0:13:32.760 Where are the black men? Where are the black men? Young? 0:13:32.800 --> 0:13:34.920 And y'are supposed to be to leaders? Were all at 0:13:35.400 --> 0:13:38.000 Why y'all ain't staying at your homes and leading your family, 0:13:38.880 --> 0:13:42.400 leading your woman, leading your children. You make a choice 0:13:42.400 --> 0:13:45.640 to leave, and now it's still mama's fault. And I 0:13:45.679 --> 0:13:47.400 feel like a lot of that should even plays out 0:13:47.480 --> 0:13:51.120 in relationships between black men and women, like intimate relationships. 0:13:51.120 --> 0:13:54.839 You got all this um, all this disdained for your 0:13:54.880 --> 0:13:57.079 mama because your daddy made a choice to leave. You 0:13:57.120 --> 0:14:00.240 don't even realize that the real problem is with your daddy. 0:14:00.600 --> 0:14:03.959 It's not even what your mom. Mama. Your mama was 0:14:04.000 --> 0:14:06.000 there and she did the best she could, oftentimes of 0:14:06.120 --> 0:14:09.319 multiple children, and she could have been married and ended 0:14:09.400 --> 0:14:14.800 up a single mom. That's my mom story, mine too, 0:14:15.679 --> 0:14:21.640 mine too. So it's no accountability for black men. No 0:14:21.680 --> 0:14:24.960 account I never hear accountability come from them now. And 0:14:25.000 --> 0:14:26.640 I know for a fact that black women do have 0:14:26.680 --> 0:14:31.239 a problem accepting accountability. I know that I'm a black woman, okay, 0:14:31.560 --> 0:14:34.320 but we are not about to put the issues of 0:14:34.320 --> 0:14:37.480 our entire community on black women. That is fucking disgusting. 0:14:37.920 --> 0:14:39.800 You know, they told us to hate the man, hate 0:14:39.840 --> 0:14:42.880 the white man, and somehow now black women are the 0:14:42.920 --> 0:14:45.680 white man. I want to do an episode on that. 0:14:47.160 --> 0:14:49.160 Are we the black Are we the white man now? 0:14:50.280 --> 0:14:56.040 Um man? Me, definitely not. But in their eyes, it's 0:14:56.080 --> 0:14:58.200 like we're being We're being put up on a pedestal 0:14:58.240 --> 0:15:00.800 above them and all this other ship. And I mean 0:15:00.840 --> 0:15:03.560 it's a certain demographic of black men who think this way. 0:15:03.560 --> 0:15:05.920 I'm not saying it's all of them, but it's a 0:15:05.960 --> 0:15:08.080 good bit. We need to get one of them all 0:15:08.480 --> 0:15:11.200 so we can have the conversation that necessary conference. I 0:15:11.240 --> 0:15:13.520 would love to I would love to do that, um 0:15:13.560 --> 0:15:15.720 and hopefully it wouldn't tear into an argument. I think 0:15:15.760 --> 0:15:18.320 I can have a conversation about that ship. I get 0:15:18.360 --> 0:15:23.160 real personal about black women, real personal, because because we 0:15:23.200 --> 0:15:30.000 are one. Yeah, I just wanna semi condolences to the 0:15:30.040 --> 0:15:36.200 family of Tyree Nichols. Man. This ship is disgusting yes, yeah, UM, 0:15:36.200 --> 0:15:39.640 moving on, UM, this is this next story is just 0:15:40.000 --> 0:15:44.640 I something I agree with. So the Surgeon General, UM, 0:15:44.680 --> 0:15:48.000 the US Surgeon General vi Vic Murphy says he believes 0:15:48.040 --> 0:15:50.240 thirteen is too young for children to be on social 0:15:50.240 --> 0:15:54.760 media platforms because all those UM sites allow children of 0:15:54.880 --> 0:15:59.320 that age to join. Kids are still developing their identities. 0:16:00.160 --> 0:16:03.720 I agree. So. I know, like Twitter, TikTok especially, that 0:16:03.880 --> 0:16:06.920 was a kids app initially, somehow adults got their ass 0:16:06.960 --> 0:16:10.000 up on there um and turned it out a little bit. 0:16:10.040 --> 0:16:13.000 TikTok is supposed to be banned soon, I believe, also 0:16:13.880 --> 0:16:18.520 UM in the US because it is a Chinese rand application. UM. Yeah, 0:16:18.560 --> 0:16:23.240 I think thirteen is he says, not until thirteen. No, 0:16:23.360 --> 0:16:25.720 he says it's too early. He said, what parents need 0:16:25.760 --> 0:16:27.920 to get together and decide what's the best age for 0:16:27.960 --> 0:16:30.880 their children, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen. He doesn't know what the 0:16:30.880 --> 0:16:33.520 age is, but he's just saying that thirteen, which is 0:16:33.560 --> 0:16:37.400 the age that most of these platforms allow people to join, UM, 0:16:37.400 --> 0:16:39.680 it's just too young. Yeah. I can't agree with that, 0:16:39.800 --> 0:16:43.960 just because it's almost impossible to monitor what they're consuming, 0:16:44.240 --> 0:16:48.040 you know. UM. And he says he's based this off 0:16:48.040 --> 0:16:51.400 of data he's actually seen, and thirteen is just too 0:16:51.400 --> 0:16:54.720 early because these kids are having like identity crisis. And 0:16:54.760 --> 0:16:57.520 then also if you're feeling just a little bit like 0:16:57.560 --> 0:16:59.520 a boy or a little bit like a girl, like 0:16:59.560 --> 0:17:01.200 you know what I'm saying, Like you have all these 0:17:01.240 --> 0:17:06.679 different outlets online to help you know, sway, yeah, push 0:17:06.760 --> 0:17:10.800 those those thought processes. And it's fucking dangerous because it's 0:17:10.800 --> 0:17:14.320 adults who probably have mental health issues who are on 0:17:14.400 --> 0:17:20.320 these apps, um soliciting the kids in all different facets, 0:17:20.359 --> 0:17:24.320 not just like your sexuality, but you know, a lot 0:17:24.400 --> 0:17:27.880 of different things. So I agree that thirteen is rather young, 0:17:28.000 --> 0:17:31.240 but I mean it's up to the parents too rear 0:17:31.600 --> 0:17:34.960 your children and regulate what they're watching. Like is it 0:17:35.040 --> 0:17:36.720 is it too early for a thirteen year to have 0:17:36.720 --> 0:17:39.760 a cell phone? I would say not, you know, because 0:17:40.000 --> 0:17:41.440 you know your kids are going to school and ship 0:17:41.520 --> 0:17:43.280 like that. I feel like if we, you know, back 0:17:43.280 --> 0:17:45.560 when we were in school, if we could have a 0:17:45.600 --> 0:17:47.840 cell phone, our parents probably would have had as one. 0:17:47.920 --> 0:17:50.480 Because she is getting way more dangerous out here now 0:17:51.119 --> 0:17:53.600 than than then anyway, so you need to be able 0:17:53.600 --> 0:17:57.200 to contact your kids. Things are happening at schools, shootings 0:17:57.200 --> 0:18:00.480 and all types of crazy ship. Your kids need to phones, 0:18:00.960 --> 0:18:04.480 but I know they have like the Parental um Guide 0:18:04.560 --> 0:18:06.760 stuff like on phones where you could block certain app 0:18:06.800 --> 0:18:09.919 block certain websites. I think parents need to be knowledgeable 0:18:10.560 --> 0:18:13.160 and implement those those things. If you're paying the bill, 0:18:13.520 --> 0:18:15.920 who'll funk arguing with a thirteen year old about an app? 0:18:16.520 --> 0:18:19.400 But here's the thing I feel like oftentimes, and y'all 0:18:19.440 --> 0:18:21.520 might get mad at me as parents. I'm not a parent, 0:18:21.600 --> 0:18:25.040 but I see a lot of parents letting social media 0:18:25.760 --> 0:18:28.560 raise their kids because they don't want to be bothered. Women. 0:18:28.600 --> 0:18:31.320 They come in, get your tablet, Go get your tablet. 0:18:31.800 --> 0:18:33.919 Did not buy you a tablet? Go get it? And 0:18:33.960 --> 0:18:36.840 there's their way of not having to deal with their ass. 0:18:37.840 --> 0:18:43.360 That's a problem. Yeah, you're not really an active parent, right. 0:18:43.720 --> 0:18:45.800 I think kids should have a certain amount of time 0:18:45.800 --> 0:18:50.359 they have access to electronics and social media and ship 0:18:50.440 --> 0:18:53.639 like that, like maybe hour two a day. You have 0:18:53.680 --> 0:18:57.040 to monitor as a parent. Kids are kids are going 0:18:57.119 --> 0:18:58.639 to do what they want to do, but you have 0:18:58.760 --> 0:19:00.600 to have you know, you gotta have some type of 0:19:00.600 --> 0:19:02.520 guidance skills in a way, you just letting your kid 0:19:02.560 --> 0:19:04.199 run them up like that because you don't feel like 0:19:04.200 --> 0:19:09.200 dealing with him McDonald see the McDonald's McDonald's every day 0:19:09.280 --> 0:19:14.840 where you're tabbing that. Yeah, I agree with the Surgeon 0:19:14.920 --> 0:19:17.639 general though. I just want to talk about that. Just 0:19:17.800 --> 0:19:19.600 I'm scared of what the world is gonna be like 0:19:19.640 --> 0:19:24.080 when we're when we're elderly, you know why you gonna 0:19:24.119 --> 0:19:27.480 be something broke back, tat it up, fake booty, fake 0:19:27.560 --> 0:19:33.080 titty bitches in church, second tattoos in your neck. That's fine, 0:19:33.600 --> 0:19:36.680 But will the kids care for us and respect this? 0:19:37.760 --> 0:19:40.360 Probably not? It depends on how you raise your kids. 0:19:40.480 --> 0:19:42.400 Probably not. You better have some money in the bank, 0:19:42.480 --> 0:19:44.440 tell me what you think. They're already beating the funk 0:19:44.440 --> 0:19:46.960 out of their teachers, now, you know, did you see 0:19:46.960 --> 0:19:50.840 that video? It was like a black girl she basically 0:19:50.840 --> 0:19:53.240 attacked her teacher and looks like the teacher was trying 0:19:53.280 --> 0:19:55.800 to call for helping the cell phone. She knocks her 0:19:55.800 --> 0:19:58.560 cell phone out the teacher's hand. Then like they end 0:19:58.640 --> 0:20:00.480 up at the door. She's trying to us to teach 0:20:00.480 --> 0:20:02.960 her out the door and close the door, and the 0:20:03.000 --> 0:20:06.240 teachers like stop putting your hands on me. See me? Personally, 0:20:06.720 --> 0:20:09.119 I would clean every classroom with that little girl ass 0:20:09.560 --> 0:20:12.640 mm hmm, there's no way. You know, like parents y'all 0:20:12.640 --> 0:20:16.200 seeing your kids at school and they're terrorizing the fucking teachers, right, 0:20:17.040 --> 0:20:20.560 no home training, respect, And then you come up there 0:20:20.640 --> 0:20:22.480 and you get mad with the teacher too, and no, 0:20:22.600 --> 0:20:24.560 damn well you'd be having to beat her ass at 0:20:24.600 --> 0:20:27.679 home too. But you're mad because another adult outside of 0:20:27.720 --> 0:20:30.439 you put their hands on her trying to teach her 0:20:30.480 --> 0:20:32.760 some respect. Yeah. I'm trying to figure out, like, how 0:20:32.800 --> 0:20:34.120 do you get to that point? How do you get 0:20:34.160 --> 0:20:37.439 that fucking mad that you attack a teacher, that you 0:20:37.760 --> 0:20:42.120 that you have no respect for authority or adults. Yeah, 0:20:42.520 --> 0:20:46.520 I don't know. You know, I would love my um. 0:20:46.560 --> 0:20:48.879 I want to I want to build a school. I 0:20:48.920 --> 0:20:53.280 was thinking about like prisons, hospitals, schools, they all look alike. 0:20:53.920 --> 0:20:57.040 What have you had, like a glass dome with a 0:20:57.080 --> 0:21:00.200 lot of greenery, a lot of sunlight so kids can 0:21:00.240 --> 0:21:03.919 actually grow, you know what I'm saying, Like you're in 0:21:03.960 --> 0:21:06.440 school all day, you come out to sun Damn they're gone. 0:21:06.800 --> 0:21:09.360 Like kids are not even getting the vitamin D the sunlight. 0:21:09.400 --> 0:21:13.720 They need to just grow properly. It's depression. Then you 0:21:13.760 --> 0:21:15.480 got throw social media on top of that and throw 0:21:15.560 --> 0:21:18.800 McDonald's on top of that anyway, dealing with a lot 0:21:18.880 --> 0:21:23.000 of social issues, y'all. We're doing No, we're not. We're 0:21:23.000 --> 0:21:29.720 gonna be good. Oh goodness, take care of us. That's 0:21:29.720 --> 0:21:32.480 all I can say. So last week we talked about 0:21:33.280 --> 0:21:36.639 breaking up. This week we want to get into dating, Like, 0:21:36.680 --> 0:21:39.040 how do you actually date? What's the process of dating? 0:21:39.320 --> 0:21:43.040 Is there a process for dating? Is there um some 0:21:43.080 --> 0:21:49.560 extra steps all that ship, We'll see. We'll talk about 0:21:49.560 --> 0:21:55.600 it when we come back from this break. All right, 0:21:55.680 --> 0:22:00.879 So we're back. So Tam, what's your definition of dating? 0:22:02.119 --> 0:22:07.919 My definition of dating? Mm hmm. It's going out with 0:22:08.200 --> 0:22:12.679 someone with the intention of getting to know them in 0:22:12.720 --> 0:22:18.720 a more intimate way and potentially fucking after the third day. 0:22:20.520 --> 0:22:27.320 I don't know what that sounds about, right, you know. 0:22:27.400 --> 0:22:30.719 I think we skipped some steps sometimes though. But so 0:22:30.760 --> 0:22:37.160 the Cambridge Dictionary definition um says to regularly spend time 0:22:37.200 --> 0:22:40.680 with someone you have a romantic relationship with. When people 0:22:40.720 --> 0:22:43.040 say they're dating a lot of times, I would think 0:22:43.119 --> 0:22:44.840 you date more than one person, right, So do you 0:22:44.840 --> 0:22:48.040 have a romantic relationship with multiple people? I think that's like, 0:22:48.160 --> 0:22:51.080 that's like the general definition, But is that really what 0:22:51.840 --> 0:22:55.920 we believe dating is well. Romance doesn't have to be physical. 0:22:56.280 --> 0:23:00.280 You're right, it could be platonic. Mm hmm. I guess no, No, 0:23:00.359 --> 0:23:02.560 it doesn't even have to be platonic. But it doesn't 0:23:02.600 --> 0:23:06.080 have to be like. Romance doesn't have to be like 0:23:06.480 --> 0:23:08.600 we have sex at the end of the night. Romance 0:23:08.640 --> 0:23:12.520 could be like someone taking you on a nice date, 0:23:12.640 --> 0:23:17.120 somewhere quiet and quaint and sexy, you know, and then 0:23:17.119 --> 0:23:18.960 on Tuesday you go to the same place with a 0:23:18.960 --> 0:23:23.480 different person. That don't mean, you know, that's still dating. 0:23:23.880 --> 0:23:26.520 But that doesn't mean sleeping with everybody. You just have 0:23:26.920 --> 0:23:30.760 romantic intention, you know, right. Look, I got a disclaimer 0:23:30.800 --> 0:23:35.920 for men that I'm dating. Men oftentimes don't have like 0:23:36.359 --> 0:23:38.880 the go to spots they don't know. Women be like 0:23:39.160 --> 0:23:43.200 yoping and figuring out like places. If I catch you 0:23:44.280 --> 0:23:48.840