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Speaker 1: This is the Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast

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Speaker 1: with i R Radio. We're back with another week of

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Speaker 1: the Almost Famous Podcast and this is a week like

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Speaker 1: none other because we have some really special guests. Um Like,

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Speaker 1: I mean, we've had amazing guests here recently, but this

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Speaker 1: episode is full of great guests, some hot topics, and

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Speaker 1: of course my co host Ashley con Eddie. Thanks Ben,

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Speaker 1: so today we got a lot of hot topics. Should

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Speaker 1: we begin or is there something you were going to

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Speaker 1: call me out on? Yeah? Yeah that now We're not

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Speaker 1: starting yet. Don't don't get away from this. Every it

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Speaker 1: feels like every evening I calmed down by you know,

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Speaker 1: scrolling quickly through Instagram and uh watching the stories of

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Speaker 1: the people that I love and admire the most in

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Speaker 1: my in my life. And Ashley, you are one of

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Speaker 1: those people that is not a secret. Uh you know,

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Speaker 1: I I think, uh, you know, I view you. I

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Speaker 1: view you like a sister, Like I think that's like

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Speaker 1: where my heart is. Like I love you deeply, Um,

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Speaker 1: I care about you deeply. UM. I find you to

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Speaker 1: be a beautiful human inside and out. And that means

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Speaker 1: so much from somebody who was so extraordinarily beautiful and

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Speaker 1: it's similar to last night. It felt similar to how

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Speaker 1: I would be watching like my sister. Um, there's a

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Speaker 1: video of you getting your pants pulled up by Jared,

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Speaker 1: which must be marriage, and you're doing it. I don't,

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Speaker 1: I don't fully understand what's happening. Um, but I'm watching

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Speaker 1: you get your pants pulled up and there's just like

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Speaker 1: this warm feeling in my heart because I see Jared's

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Speaker 1: commitment to supporting you and helping you, and it makes

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Speaker 1: me joyfully like giddy in the evening. But if anybody,

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Speaker 1: if if nobody watched it, Uh, what was going on?

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Speaker 1: And what was I watching? Okay? So I've always had

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Speaker 1: this problem, and maybe it's not a problem because I

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Speaker 1: love my body shape and I love that I have

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Speaker 1: like a full butt in a tiny waist. Um, But

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Speaker 1: something that comes along with that body shape often is

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Speaker 1: not being able to find jeans that fit properly. I

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Speaker 1: love Good American. I will shout Good Americans name from

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Speaker 1: the rooftops because they are finally a brand that I

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Speaker 1: can just slip my jeans up my up, past my thighs,

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Speaker 1: over my butt and it fits perfectly around my waist

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Speaker 1: without me having to get them altered. But I saw

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Speaker 1: these Zara jeans there are very nineties are so cool. Um.

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Speaker 1: They just had these gigantic rips and they were loose

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Speaker 1: and all the like the places I felt like Reese

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Speaker 1: Witherspoon and fear or something. So I had to get

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Speaker 1: these even Oh yeah, isn't she just the cutest in

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Speaker 1: that so um, I knew that they didn't fit around

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Speaker 1: my waist very well. I had to get them taken in,

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Speaker 1: and they took them in maybe a little bit too much,

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Speaker 1: to the point that I really couldn't get them over

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Speaker 1: my butt. But I wasn't going to like just retire

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Speaker 1: them after I spent seventy getting them and I love

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Speaker 1: them so much, so I was like, no, I have

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Speaker 1: to wear these, but it's going to require help every

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Speaker 1: time I pulled them up and pull them down. So

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Speaker 1: I the other day Jared had to basically pick me

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Speaker 1: up while having his fingers through the loops of my jeans,

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Speaker 1: and then I had to kind of hold his neck

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Speaker 1: and he had to kind of drop me into the jeans.

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Speaker 1: It was kind of like if you're like, imagine putting

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Speaker 1: a pillow into a pillowcase, okay, right, And so it

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Speaker 1: was such a scene. I was like, Okay, when I

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Speaker 1: take these things off, I'm going to videotape it because

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Speaker 1: it took a solid minute for him to have to

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Speaker 1: pull them off my legs. So I videotaped it. I

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Speaker 1: thought it was pretty funny, pretty relatable. Um, if anybody

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Speaker 1: else has that similar issue, Um, and that is love,

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Speaker 1: that is marriage, and that's a big booty. So is

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Speaker 1: there like a sense of accomplishment that Jared feels when

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Speaker 1: he gets them off? Like do you see a smile? Okay?

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Speaker 1: Just like it, Like it's almost so ignor Like things

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Speaker 1: like that are like just so commonplace now that he's

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Speaker 1: like not in phase, Like if you watch it, he's

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Speaker 1: watching Superman in the background, Like he's way more focused

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Speaker 1: on Superman. And Okay. Also, this brings up an interesting

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Speaker 1: topic that that I've wanted to discuss with multiple women

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Speaker 1: in my life, and I always forget, uh, how okay,

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Speaker 1: So say you're in a scenario where there's like a yeah, okay,

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Speaker 1: So there's two things I want to go with this,

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Speaker 1: those those Jeanes being one, because what do you do

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Speaker 1: if you're at the restaurant? And because when when he

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Speaker 1: when he finally gets the pants off. You see that

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Speaker 1: you're wearing something that looks like a bathing suit. I

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Speaker 1: had a bodysuit on ye shout out to Lonnie the

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Speaker 1: label by Amanda Stanton. Yeah, good for good for her.

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Speaker 1: But like this, this isn't just one layer of trickiness.

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Speaker 1: There's two, because then you have something that like literally

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Speaker 1: next your whole body. So here's my question for you.

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Speaker 1: Between that and I think it's called a romper, like

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Speaker 1: the full body romper things, How an emergency situations does

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Speaker 1: one go about their business successfully without causing a scene

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Speaker 1: or need to completely change in the restroom? Fantastic question back,

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Speaker 1: thank you. So when you're wearing like a jumpsuit, which

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Speaker 1: is kind of like a romper but a pants edition,

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Speaker 1: you basically get naked in the stall. So it sounds

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Speaker 1: so unsanitary. Well, I don't know that it's unsanitary. It's

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Speaker 1: just awkward because like if somebody were to like peek

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Speaker 1: through the cracks of a public restroom, they would just

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Speaker 1: see like this naked girl squatting a romper in This

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Speaker 1: is what I do, And maybe a lot of girls

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Speaker 1: are going to be like what the hell? But I

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Speaker 1: just pull it to the side. There's so much there

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Speaker 1: that could go wrong. Oh yeah, you can definitely get

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Speaker 1: p on your romper. But even if like, what's a

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Speaker 1: cup sprinkles, but I don't do it. I don't sprinkle.

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Speaker 1: I wouldn't sprinkle um. And then in this case where

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Speaker 1: you're wearing way too tight of pants, that's just that's

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Speaker 1: one of those instances where people people are probably gonna

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Speaker 1: think you're pooping in the public restroom, but you're really

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Speaker 1: just trying to get them off and on, like you're

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Speaker 1: like grunting, you're jumping up and down, you're pulling it

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Speaker 1: in time commitment. Holy I don't think I could have

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Speaker 1: gotten those off myself though, So I knew when I

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Speaker 1: went to dinner that it was going to be like

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Speaker 1: you cannot be and like make yourself a little dehydrated

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Speaker 1: if possible. Wow, there's just a lot going on here.

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Speaker 1: I'm always learning something. You know what I did this weekend?

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Speaker 1: I went to a Halloween party that was Renaissance and

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Speaker 1: Harry Potter themed. Wait, why a Halloween party so soon?

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Speaker 1: I don't know, just I mean, I don't mind it. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I don't really know. I mean it's just like one

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Speaker 1: of my friend's wise wanted to throw a Halloween party,

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Speaker 1: you know, a month in advance. Um, and there was

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Speaker 1: only like ten people there. I think it was like

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Speaker 1: a super small group. I didn't wear a costume, was

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Speaker 1: the only one, so like I was one of I know,

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Speaker 1: I had I have issues. I I have given up

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Speaker 1: my renaissance days based on you know, my new life,

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Speaker 1: but of the theme. But here's what happened. So, because

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Speaker 1: like there's only a few amount of people there, and

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Speaker 1: I think typically she throws a huge party, like massive celebration.

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Speaker 1: She didn't want to like uh not have fun, Like

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Speaker 1: she still wanted to go all out, and so she

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Speaker 1: bought a bouncy castle, like a massive bouncy castle, and

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Speaker 1: nobody was getting in it. And so my buddy and

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Speaker 1: I decided to jump around the bouncy castle for anybodyut

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Speaker 1: there listening. I don't know the last time you jumped

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Speaker 1: on a like something. I don't know if it's like

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Speaker 1: if it's a bouncy castle, if it's trampoline, or if

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Speaker 1: you just like jumped around in your yard for a bit.

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Speaker 1: You will never feel so out of shape. And so

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Speaker 1: then spending one minute, like as a kid, you could bounty,

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Speaker 1: you could jump, you could fall, you get back up,

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Speaker 1: you can tackle your buddies. I did it for two minutes.

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Speaker 1: My buddy and I did not. This is not an exaggeration.

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Speaker 1: He gets out of the bouncy castle and throws up

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Speaker 1: next to him, shut up. And there was no adult

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Speaker 1: beverages at play. It is just simply the fact that

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Speaker 1: my heart raced to a level I haven't felt in

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Speaker 1: twenty years. It was aggressive, it was unique. That's not shocking.

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Speaker 1: The throw up is hilarious, but I totally know what

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Speaker 1: you mean. Getting on a trampoline looks just like exhaustion

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Speaker 1: to me. There's no sense of fun there anymore. And

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Speaker 1: a bouncy castle, those things like they get they get

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Speaker 1: you so low, you know, there's so there's so much jump,

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Speaker 1: there's so much height to the jump. There nothing nothing

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Speaker 1: calls uh, nothing calls my name more than uh. Since

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Speaker 1: I don't have an a c l I can couch

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Speaker 1: calls name. But a bouncy castle in my knee is

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Speaker 1: like hyper standing on itself every time. Nothing just makes

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Speaker 1: me feel like a couch. A couch sounds great anyways, Hey,

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Speaker 1: lots our weekends. We're happy to be back with you. Uh,

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Speaker 1: We're happy to be breaking down everything going on in vacchination.

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Speaker 1: There are things going on that we'll bring in Mike

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Speaker 1: Johnson here and just a little bit, so make sure

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Speaker 1: you tune in for that before we get the hot topics.

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Speaker 1: Let's take one break. When we come back, we're gonna

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Speaker 1: break down everything going on in Bachelor Nation. Matt James

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Speaker 1: begins filming season twenty five of The Bachelor. See you

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Speaker 1: all in two months. He says, nothing juicy here, guys,

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Speaker 1: just a fact of the matter that the season has begun. Um,

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Speaker 1: I don't think we can can confirm where they're shooting yet,

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Speaker 1: but if you guys do want to do a little

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Speaker 1: quick search online you can find out. So Ashley, as

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Speaker 1: we prep now for getting closer to the season of

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Speaker 1: The Bachelorette, that there hasn't been anything released to my

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Speaker 1: knowledge yet on the details of this season. Then knowing

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Speaker 1: that just you know, in a few months, Matt's gonna

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Speaker 1: be off filming The Bachelor, We're gonna have another season

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Speaker 1: pretty quickly following like, how excited are you? It feels

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Speaker 1: like it's been forever. Yeah, it's fun. It's it's really fun,

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Speaker 1: And I can't help but think of how excited I

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Speaker 1: am for the producers to be done filming this season

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Speaker 1: because they have gone NonStop since we'll say June, right,

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Speaker 1: I mean, they are going five months, five six months

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Speaker 1: completely straight, and that's something that they never really have

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Speaker 1: to experience. So I'm excited for them to be able

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Speaker 1: to have a holiday break once it gets here. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: you know, and that's a I think it's an interesting

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Speaker 1: note that we we've brought up before, but just a

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Speaker 1: good reminder for all of us, Like when it comes

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Speaker 1: to first responders, when it comes to any essential workers,

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Speaker 1: when it comes to anybody now trying to put entertainment

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Speaker 1: on or any any industry that's trying to make this

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Speaker 1: period of time work for them, there are huge sacrifices

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Speaker 1: that are being taken place. Like there are producers on

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Speaker 1: the show. They're sound guys on the show. You know,

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Speaker 1: if if you hear the word producer out there you're listening,

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Speaker 1: you're like, oh, Bachelor producers, they're all terrible. Well, then

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Speaker 1: let's go to the sound people, let's go to the cameraman,

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Speaker 1: let's go do the people behind the scenes. There are

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Speaker 1: people who have just had babies, but this is the

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Speaker 1: way they put food on the table and pay for

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Speaker 1: their families. And now for the last few months they

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Speaker 1: have literally been in quarantine without being able to see

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Speaker 1: these people. We keep talking NBA hockey right, well, these

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Speaker 1: people are quarantining away for their families for months of

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Speaker 1: that time as well. It's it's you, just it's it's

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Speaker 1: an important reminder. There's a lot of to be grateful

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Speaker 1: for when you when things are given up, like uh,

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Speaker 1: you know, the time with the family. I think you'd

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Speaker 1: become more grateful for your time spent. But as fans,

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Speaker 1: as listeners, whatever, we have to realize that people are

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Speaker 1: making huge sacrifices, not just in entertainment, not just in sports,

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Speaker 1: but all over the place to make sure that this

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Speaker 1: world still functions at a level that's suitable for all

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Speaker 1: of us. So anyways, shout out to the Bachelor they

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Speaker 1: are filming. Matt James is gone and we're looking forward

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Speaker 1: to his season just as much as we are looking

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Speaker 1: forward to the Bachelorette. Well, speaking of bachelorettes, I think

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Speaker 1: I could easily say the Queen the favorite, one of

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Speaker 1: the favorites. Most people love this person, Caitlin Bristow. We're

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Speaker 1: watching her right now on Dancing with the Stars. She

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Speaker 1: is still on the show. She's doing great, but last

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Speaker 1: week she had a battle to go through and that

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Speaker 1: was a battle with pain. She suffered from an ankle injury. Ashley,

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Speaker 1: what's the updates. There's not much update right now. She

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Speaker 1: had an m r I on Thursday. She was scared

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Speaker 1: about getting the m r I because those can be supercaustrophobic,

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Speaker 1: but she didn't have to have her head in, which

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Speaker 1: is good. Um, but she's just super anxious about getting

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Speaker 1: the medical results back and she hasn't gotten back yet. Huh. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: So she doesn't have the results of the m r

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Speaker 1: I back, but as of the recording of this podcast,

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Speaker 1: she is out of Dancing with the Stars set getting

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Speaker 1: her makeup done, so it looks like she's going to

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Speaker 1: be dancing tonight. Um. I guess the issue here is

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Speaker 1: that she's had very little rehearsal time, so I think

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Speaker 1: she's very anxious about the fact that her dance probably

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Speaker 1: won't be as well rehearsed as she's been able to

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Speaker 1: do the past couple of weeks and as much as

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Speaker 1: everybody else has been doing. So you guys make sure

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Speaker 1: to vote for Caitlin. We know that her ankle. Is

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Speaker 1: she's still in pain. It's getting better with the days,

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Speaker 1: she said, which is a good sign. So do we

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Speaker 1: know from Dance with the Stars, like, where does Caitlin

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Speaker 1: typically stand when it comes to votes and rankings? Is

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Speaker 1: Is she typically very safe or she on the fringe?

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Speaker 1: She she's not on the fringe at all. She's getting

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Speaker 1: sevens and eights both weeks, So I mean, I think

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Speaker 1: she's she's pretty, She's gonna I think she's gonna be

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Speaker 1: safe regardless of how obvious her injury is, because the

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Speaker 1: fan vote is just going to She's gonna yeah. And um,

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Speaker 1: I don't know how the judging works if the judges

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Speaker 1: know that there's an injury present, Like, are they easier

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Speaker 1: or are they are they easier on them to give

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Speaker 1: them any sort of slack or they kind of like,

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Speaker 1: it's your decision to be other dancing. I don't know,

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Speaker 1: that's a good question. I don't know if they've even

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Speaker 1: said or if there is a like a precedent for

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Speaker 1: that is. Uh, is Carol Baskin still on the show? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: but she was in the bottom too last week and

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Speaker 1: I think the judges made the decision to keep her okay,

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Speaker 1: So like her time isn't long. Probably, I don't think so. What.

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Speaker 1: I'm actually surprised because I thought she'd have a lot

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Speaker 1: of fan vote too. Did you see that her that

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Speaker 1: the husband, you know, the husband that we all we

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Speaker 1: all know, has passed away somehow over what was it

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Speaker 1: like over a decade ago? They paid to have an

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Speaker 1: ad run during Dancing with the Stars, the first against Carol. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I saw that. That's aggressive move, not cheap move either,

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Speaker 1: if to have primetime ABC commercial space. So statements are

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Speaker 1: being made. Dance with Stars is airing this week. May

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Speaker 1: surely go vote for Kaitlin uh and support her Bachelor Nation. Okay,

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Speaker 1: next headline is one from somebody that we will be

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Speaker 1: talking to in just a bit, and we get more

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Speaker 1: info on this later on, But it says Mike Johnson

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Speaker 1: would never return to Bachelor in Paradise. This according to

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Speaker 1: US Weekly. Yeah, that's interesting to me. We'll have to

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Speaker 1: get the answer from him. But he said, everyone involved,

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Speaker 1: including Mike flies, has been wonderful to me, freaking awesome people.

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Speaker 1: I would not do Bachelor in Paradise ever. Again, probably

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Speaker 1: it's just not my cup of tea. He also is,

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Speaker 1: you know, talking about his new book, which we will

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Speaker 1: we will talk about later. So Mike Johnson has a book,

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Speaker 1: he has a lot going on. Uh, I do want

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Speaker 1: to dig into this a bit. I feel like he's

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Speaker 1: like well suited for Paradise, Like I just think he

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Speaker 1: would he fits there. He's likable guy, he's a good

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Speaker 1: looking guy. You can show up to the beach and

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Speaker 1: meet some of these new people. But we'll figure out

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Speaker 1: what he's all about and why he's saying no to

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Speaker 1: Bachelor in Paradise at least for right now when we

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Speaker 1: bring him on here after the commercial break. Now, this week, Ashley,

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Speaker 1: we are going to talk to shan Low and Catherine

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Speaker 1: Uh in an in depth episode that will be airing

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Speaker 1: into the week. Super pumped for that, and uh, they're

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Speaker 1: gonna be great there. Obviously they've been in our headlines

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Speaker 1: for the last few weeks now, we've been talking about him.

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Speaker 1: This week's headline is a little different. Uh. Katherine responds

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Speaker 1: and starts opening up about how she feels about Shanno

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Speaker 1: shan Low not initially picking her. This according to US

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Speaker 1: Weekly as well. Okay, so I'm like initially picking her,

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Speaker 1: She's putting herself on the shoes of say, the mas NICs,

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Speaker 1: Uh if they if you were to ever pick somebody else,

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Speaker 1: and then went back to Catherine. She said that she'd

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Speaker 1: be pissed, that it would take a while for her

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Speaker 1: to get over and Sean would never live it down.

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Speaker 1: I feel her. You get it, you definitely get it. Well.

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Speaker 1: Next headline is The Bachelor's Tinley Moleson welcomes daughter rel

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Speaker 1: James absolute perfection and I quote, yeah, um, she is studying.

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Speaker 1: What a beautiful baby. She said that we've been completely

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Speaker 1: captivated and swept off our feet in love with our

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Speaker 1: precious baby girl. We haven't gotten around to introductions. She

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Speaker 1: said this when when she was first born, I think

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Speaker 1: about a week and a half maybe two weeks ago now,

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Speaker 1: and by following Tinley's Instagram, she's been making all the

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Speaker 1: family introductions, the aunts, the uncles, the grandparents, the cousins,

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Speaker 1: all that stuff this week and showing off this beautiful

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Speaker 1: little girl her and husband Taylor had this month. I mean,

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Speaker 1: two good looking people having a good looking baby. Not shocked,

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Speaker 1: not shocked. Well, speaking of one of our favorites, we

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Speaker 1: have to give a congratulations. But all so some breaking news,

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Speaker 1: unexpected news. Maybe I should say Bachelor alum Leslie and

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Speaker 1: Murphy is Yes, I'll say it. She's pregnant, expecting her

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Speaker 1: first child with fiance Alex. This also according to US Weekly. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: she posted us on Instagram yesterday she said baby Kavanaugh

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Speaker 1: taking flight in Finally someone to occupy the middle seat. UM.

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Speaker 1: Her pointfriend her, he says at drone Pilot, her fiance

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Speaker 1: and I couldn't be more excited to grow our little family. Um.

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Speaker 1: She also she played she played the Ronetts be my

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Speaker 1: baby in the background of this, so really really cute.

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Speaker 1: Congratulations to her. Um. I feel like there's been a

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Speaker 1: lot of baby news and the girl like all these girls,

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Speaker 1: I want a girl, And I'm like Jared, there's so

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Speaker 1: many baby girls in Bachelor Nation. There's no way we're

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Speaker 1: going to have a girl first. Well, yeah, because the

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Speaker 1: genetics bat does. Uh. Super exciting for both of them.

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Speaker 1: I mean, we've had some amazing baby news over the

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Speaker 1: last few weeks here on the podcast. Uh with babies

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Speaker 1: you know who started out uh needing extra care in

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Speaker 1: the hospital, who have came home healthy. I mean, I

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Speaker 1: don't know if you have the list in front of you, um,

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Speaker 1: but it is, Yeah, go ahead. So it was Liz

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Speaker 1: we had ten and now we have Leslie, we had Courtney.

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Speaker 1: Can you think of anybody else from this year? That's four?

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Speaker 1: I can't. I mean, when was Tanner and Jade's last

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Speaker 1: child born? Well, Tanner, and you're right, there's a good one.

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Speaker 1: So the next one will be born in November. It's incredible.

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Speaker 1: I mean, just a lot of babies happening. I mean, hey,

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Speaker 1: but let's be honest. I guess this wouldn't be I

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Speaker 1: was gonna say Quarantine probably had some people having babies.

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Speaker 1: But this wouldn't be Quarantine. Babies wouldn't. Leslie's wouldn't be.

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Speaker 1: What about Britta Nelson? Did you have a child? Britta Nelson? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's a good job. Thank you big. Yeah, that's a

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Speaker 1: big There's just a lot to celebrate, and Bachelor Nation

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Speaker 1: life is being born. We will always celebrate that. Uh. Hey,

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Speaker 1: final headline here, Hannah Brown hits the water in a

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Speaker 1: bikini with some Bachelor besties to celebrate her birthday. Hey,

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Speaker 1: before we go on this headline, I do have to

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Speaker 1: take a note. I just googled it and Beca Martinez

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Speaker 1: also had a baby this year. Du good job. Okay, yeah,

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Speaker 1: so uh not a real juicy story here. But Hannah

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Speaker 1: Brown did turn twenty six this weekend, and she was

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Speaker 1: joined by Demi and Hannah Gee on what looked like

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Speaker 1: a fabulous yacht in the l A area. Over the

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Speaker 1: past couple of days, she had like kind of like

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Speaker 1: a week long celebration. I know she did some um

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Speaker 1: zoom some zoom birthday party with some bachelor fins. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: they're on a yacht and I'm in a bouncy house

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Speaker 1: sweating my brain. We don't live the same life. But

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Speaker 1: the point is there's just a lot of babies being

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Speaker 1: born in Bachelor Nation. Um, we're gonna take a break

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Speaker 1: when we come back. During break, we're gonna google all

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Speaker 1: the children being born in Batchel Nation this year because

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Speaker 1: I'm sure we miss him. But we come back, we're

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Speaker 1: gonna have Mike Johnson on the podcast talking about his

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Speaker 1: recent project along with his dating life, uh and what

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Speaker 1: his new roommate and him will be up to in Austin, Texas. Uh,

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Speaker 1: let's take a break, we come back, well, Mike Johnson. Okay,

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Speaker 1: So the Bachelor Babies that we did re Pecca Martinez, Um,

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Speaker 1: Jenna Cooper, Travis Stark, and Kelly Travis If we are

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Speaker 1: missing any of them. This list let us know. It's

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Speaker 1: hinted at UH in the beginning of the podcast, and

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Speaker 1: UH consistent person on the Almost Famous Podcast. We've also

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Speaker 1: done an in depth episode with this human who you

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Speaker 1: should go back and list in two we have up

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Speaker 1: next in the Almost Famous Podcast, Mike Johnson, Mike, welcome,

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Speaker 1: Thank you, thank you, thank you, Ben, thank you asked

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Speaker 1: you for having me back. I feel like I can't

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Speaker 1: believe I'm saying this. I feel like I'm a part

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Speaker 1: of the family. You are a friend of the podcast. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I feel like a friend of the five. I agree.

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Speaker 1: I was thinking the same thing earlier. So you remember

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Speaker 1: last time you're here, you're talking about maybe moving and

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Speaker 1: you've decided to make that leap. You're in Austin. Yes,

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Speaker 1: Connor and I are moving to Austin. Let's go Connor

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Speaker 1: who just I mean Connor Saley? Right? Who was on

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Speaker 1: the show with you? Yes, Connor Salley. He won our

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Speaker 1: season of the Bachelortte. Wait did he win that? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: The guy that wanted. You know, in most people's hearts,

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Speaker 1: that guy is a good looking fella. He's nice, he's kind,

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Speaker 1: he has his own stuff going. How how did you

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Speaker 1: two decide to live together. Have you stayed for ends

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Speaker 1: throughout the last couple of months. Yeah, man, I think

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Speaker 1: that probably. Honestly, our alumni, the Bachelor of Alumni is

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Speaker 1: I think, for most part are pretty cool people. And

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Speaker 1: Connor lives in Dallas. I live in San Antonio, but

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Speaker 1: my family is from Dallas, and so I would always

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Speaker 1: go up to Dallas and Connor and I would always

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Speaker 1: try to kick it and hang out, some workouts together

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Speaker 1: and do some business things together. And I mean we've

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Speaker 1: just naturally continued to come together. I mean even on

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Speaker 1: the show, we were bunk mates every step of the way. Um,

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Speaker 1: he left and then I left the next day. I

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Speaker 1: mean we're like it just was. It was meant to be.

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Speaker 1: When was the last time you lived at the roommate? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I asked a great question because that I swore I

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Speaker 1: would never do it again. And like my last day

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Speaker 1: is my best friend to this day. He's a great

423
00:23:51,440 --> 00:23:54,680
Speaker 1: human being. But like when you live with somebody, you know,

424
00:23:54,880 --> 00:23:58,480
Speaker 1: like you can't do certain things no more. Right, So

425
00:23:59,320 --> 00:24:02,080
Speaker 1: the last time I had a roommate, I was twenty

426
00:24:02,160 --> 00:24:05,120
Speaker 1: years old. It was right before going into the military. Um,

427
00:24:05,200 --> 00:24:07,639
Speaker 1: and so actually funny story about that. I was in

428
00:24:07,720 --> 00:24:11,320
Speaker 1: community college at the time. I came home and I

429
00:24:11,400 --> 00:24:13,320
Speaker 1: told my roommate at the time, it's just things bright

430
00:24:13,800 --> 00:24:16,119
Speaker 1: like my best for me in the world. And I said, Bro,

431
00:24:16,560 --> 00:24:18,760
Speaker 1: I'm joining the military. I'm joining the Air Force. He

432
00:24:18,880 --> 00:24:20,960
Speaker 1: was like, man, don't join the military. Bro, don't do that.

433
00:24:21,400 --> 00:24:23,480
Speaker 1: Next thing. I know he up and left before I

434
00:24:23,600 --> 00:24:31,040
Speaker 1: left to the military. So look at you being all influential, Mike.

435
00:24:31,160 --> 00:24:33,359
Speaker 1: What's one thing you're gonna have to give up with

436
00:24:33,520 --> 00:24:35,560
Speaker 1: a roommate that you don't want to have to give up?

437
00:24:37,160 --> 00:24:40,440
Speaker 1: Then I'm not gonna lie. I tell people all the

438
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:44,440
Speaker 1: time too. I can't believe on the saying when you're

439
00:24:44,480 --> 00:24:48,200
Speaker 1: filling down or sadder, the pressure anything, run around the house,

440
00:24:48,240 --> 00:24:50,639
Speaker 1: but Naken, listening to your favorite music and screaming at

441
00:24:50,640 --> 00:24:54,280
Speaker 1: the top of your lungs. I don't you know. I

442
00:24:54,320 --> 00:24:56,119
Speaker 1: don't want Connor to get jealous. I can't do it.

443
00:24:56,720 --> 00:24:58,520
Speaker 1: I don't. I was gonna say, you don't have to stop.

444
00:24:58,640 --> 00:25:00,280
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't know what's told you back, buddy.

445
00:25:01,640 --> 00:25:04,000
Speaker 1: I was literally going to say, I feel like Mike

446
00:25:04,119 --> 00:25:05,680
Speaker 1: is the kind of guy who likes to walk around

447
00:25:05,680 --> 00:25:12,920
Speaker 1: the house naked. But you know, I still have a

448
00:25:13,040 --> 00:25:14,760
Speaker 1: room to do that in. You know, I still can

449
00:25:14,840 --> 00:25:16,280
Speaker 1: do my thing in my room, just locked the door.

450
00:25:17,400 --> 00:25:20,440
Speaker 1: There's so many questions I can ask about, like having

451
00:25:20,520 --> 00:25:23,359
Speaker 1: a room, like just getting a new roommate, Like how

452
00:25:23,400 --> 00:25:24,959
Speaker 1: are you guys going to deal with food? Like are

453
00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:27,280
Speaker 1: you going to think about like you can ask each

454
00:25:27,280 --> 00:25:28,840
Speaker 1: other what do you want for dinner every night? Or

455
00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:30,360
Speaker 1: is it going to be like we do our own

456
00:25:30,400 --> 00:25:34,240
Speaker 1: separate grocery shopping. No, that's yoah see I don't that

457
00:25:34,359 --> 00:25:36,280
Speaker 1: would never come. I'm go speak for Connor and I.

458
00:25:36,840 --> 00:25:39,000
Speaker 1: That's something we don't have to ask each other. It's

459
00:25:39,040 --> 00:25:41,960
Speaker 1: like no, that question is like no, it's like, bro,

460
00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:44,359
Speaker 1: I'm cooking some healthy food. You want someone? You know?

461
00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:47,679
Speaker 1: We don't even ask you, just like we're both always hungry.

462
00:25:49,720 --> 00:25:53,480
Speaker 1: What is one thing that you can foresee being annoyed

463
00:25:53,720 --> 00:25:58,280
Speaker 1: about Connor with without even a thought? Connor is a

464
00:25:58,440 --> 00:26:03,280
Speaker 1: beautiful human being, but the boy is junk right his

465
00:26:03,520 --> 00:26:05,280
Speaker 1: count Oh my god. When he stayed here in my

466
00:26:05,359 --> 00:26:07,399
Speaker 1: place for you know, like a week or so. And

467
00:26:07,600 --> 00:26:10,679
Speaker 1: Connor loves to work out. And that's one reason why

468
00:26:10,720 --> 00:26:12,440
Speaker 1: I'm so happy to moving together because he's gonna be

469
00:26:12,480 --> 00:26:16,120
Speaker 1: like a positive influence on me. But the dude needs

470
00:26:16,160 --> 00:26:20,280
Speaker 1: a pick up after him. So so that's gonna be

471
00:26:20,480 --> 00:26:22,800
Speaker 1: a little a nuance for me, a nuance for me.

472
00:26:23,320 --> 00:26:25,800
Speaker 1: So the final roommate question, and I think this is

473
00:26:25,920 --> 00:26:29,800
Speaker 1: one that even I'm experiencing with my fiance as we

474
00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:32,680
Speaker 1: start to talk about getting married and we're gonna live.

475
00:26:33,880 --> 00:26:36,520
Speaker 1: Shout out to Jess Yeah, shout out to Jess. Uh.

476
00:26:37,440 --> 00:26:39,800
Speaker 1: I think the one thing they can break roommates. I

477
00:26:39,880 --> 00:26:41,800
Speaker 1: think you can make it happen and work together. I

478
00:26:41,840 --> 00:26:43,920
Speaker 1: think it's awesome and I don't know if I could

479
00:26:43,920 --> 00:26:47,240
Speaker 1: do it again, but I'm happy for you. It's a bathroom.

480
00:26:47,480 --> 00:26:49,119
Speaker 1: So are you gonna have to share a bathroom? Do

481
00:26:49,200 --> 00:26:52,399
Speaker 1: you have your own individual bathrooms? Because sharing a bathroom

482
00:26:52,440 --> 00:26:58,199
Speaker 1: could ruin you too. Absolutely, you're of the money, like seriously,

483
00:26:58,280 --> 00:27:03,440
Speaker 1: like the bathroom is like a sacred like I'm not like,

484
00:27:03,520 --> 00:27:06,320
Speaker 1: once I move in with a lady again, you know what,

485
00:27:06,359 --> 00:27:09,840
Speaker 1: I'm a relationship. The moment that I could take a

486
00:27:09,920 --> 00:27:12,280
Speaker 1: crap and she's in the bathroom at the same time,

487
00:27:12,560 --> 00:27:18,800
Speaker 1: that means love, right, So you're okay with that. I'm

488
00:27:18,960 --> 00:27:20,960
Speaker 1: not okay with that. We've talked about this on the

489
00:27:21,040 --> 00:27:24,200
Speaker 1: podcast before, maybe even before you were even on the show,

490
00:27:24,680 --> 00:27:30,159
Speaker 1: you would be okay, seen your lady poop? Yeah, I mean, like,

491
00:27:30,480 --> 00:27:34,160
Speaker 1: you know, we love, we're like, we're growing together. I'm

492
00:27:34,200 --> 00:27:36,159
Speaker 1: cool with that. I don't want to see myself poop.

493
00:27:38,560 --> 00:27:40,199
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't want to see the white popart.

494
00:27:40,320 --> 00:27:42,600
Speaker 1: But you know, outside of that good, Oh my gosh,

495
00:27:42,640 --> 00:27:45,680
Speaker 1: all right, while you're sitting I'm okay. Well, but then

496
00:27:46,280 --> 00:27:48,679
Speaker 1: I was talking more about the counter. I was more

497
00:27:48,720 --> 00:27:52,880
Speaker 1: of the count bathroom. Yeah, on bathroom, bro, we gotta

498
00:27:52,960 --> 00:27:55,760
Speaker 1: work good. Well, Mike, you have some stuff going on

499
00:27:55,880 --> 00:27:58,479
Speaker 1: right now that we got to dive into and talk about. Uh.

500
00:27:58,600 --> 00:28:00,280
Speaker 1: Not only do we love catching up on your life,

501
00:28:00,400 --> 00:28:04,000
Speaker 1: but you also has recently came out the book called

502
00:28:04,240 --> 00:28:07,440
Speaker 1: Making the Love you Want. Uh. You know, instead of

503
00:28:07,520 --> 00:28:10,200
Speaker 1: me trying to explain to everybody, how about you just

504
00:28:10,320 --> 00:28:12,320
Speaker 1: tell our listeners what this is about. What they can

505
00:28:12,359 --> 00:28:18,600
Speaker 1: look forward to me being extremely authentic and transparent. There's

506
00:28:18,680 --> 00:28:20,879
Speaker 1: so much more than a smile. There is so much

507
00:28:20,920 --> 00:28:22,959
Speaker 1: more than you being the pastor. There's so much more

508
00:28:23,000 --> 00:28:26,680
Speaker 1: than Ashley and Jared right, and in my book you

509
00:28:26,760 --> 00:28:31,760
Speaker 1: will learn so much more about me things that are unflattering,

510
00:28:32,440 --> 00:28:35,600
Speaker 1: but I feel that that's me standing in my power.

511
00:28:36,000 --> 00:28:38,360
Speaker 1: And that's the goal that I want everyone to have

512
00:28:38,560 --> 00:28:41,440
Speaker 1: when reading my book and window going through my book,

513
00:28:41,480 --> 00:28:44,560
Speaker 1: and you know, uh, working through my book is knowing

514
00:28:44,640 --> 00:28:48,000
Speaker 1: that we all have self living beliefs, but we're gonna

515
00:28:48,040 --> 00:28:51,520
Speaker 1: shatter every single stuff. For me, belief and the unflattering

516
00:28:51,600 --> 00:28:54,800
Speaker 1: things I'll talked about my book. It was hard for

517
00:28:54,880 --> 00:28:57,880
Speaker 1: me to say I want to be a success when

518
00:28:57,920 --> 00:29:02,400
Speaker 1: I was doing incredibly ignorant things. But those are all

519
00:29:02,960 --> 00:29:06,120
Speaker 1: self limiting beliefs that I had upon myself right and

520
00:29:06,960 --> 00:29:08,960
Speaker 1: for us to stand up in our power. And I

521
00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:10,920
Speaker 1: remember I did an I G Live two days ago

522
00:29:11,040 --> 00:29:13,280
Speaker 1: with the lady named Sarah, like I really care about

523
00:29:13,400 --> 00:29:16,320
Speaker 1: our extended UH family, that's where I call our fans.

524
00:29:16,840 --> 00:29:20,200
Speaker 1: And Sarah was telling me she does a calligraphy, and

525
00:29:20,320 --> 00:29:23,120
Speaker 1: she was telling me that I would. I asked her

526
00:29:23,120 --> 00:29:25,000
Speaker 1: a question in regards to a piece of clligraphy that

527
00:29:25,080 --> 00:29:29,680
Speaker 1: she did for Brianna Taylor, and I was incredibly moved

528
00:29:29,720 --> 00:29:31,840
Speaker 1: by it, and so I said, why did you start calligraphy?

529
00:29:31,920 --> 00:29:34,360
Speaker 1: And she told me that that was how she found

530
00:29:34,440 --> 00:29:37,120
Speaker 1: her voice, that was how she found her way to

531
00:29:37,200 --> 00:29:40,360
Speaker 1: stand in her power. And so my book is simply

532
00:29:41,960 --> 00:29:46,040
Speaker 1: giving you the keys to finding your own powers, to

533
00:29:46,200 --> 00:29:48,960
Speaker 1: knowing that you are beautifully made in God's creation and

534
00:29:49,160 --> 00:29:52,440
Speaker 1: that you're awesome human being. Let's do it. Can you

535
00:29:52,560 --> 00:29:54,400
Speaker 1: give us one of those keys right now? This as

536
00:29:54,440 --> 00:29:57,200
Speaker 1: a teaser? Can I give you one of those keys

537
00:29:57,280 --> 00:29:58,800
Speaker 1: right now? I should give you a book right now.

538
00:29:59,280 --> 00:30:03,520
Speaker 1: As a teaser, I would say today, literally, I want

539
00:30:03,560 --> 00:30:05,360
Speaker 1: you to look in your mirror that you have, not

540
00:30:05,920 --> 00:30:09,280
Speaker 1: the same bathroom then with ys, but look into a

541
00:30:09,320 --> 00:30:11,880
Speaker 1: mirror that you have, and I want you to write

542
00:30:11,880 --> 00:30:17,440
Speaker 1: now three things that you love about yourself. So, for example,

543
00:30:17,920 --> 00:30:19,400
Speaker 1: for me, what I would do is, I would say

544
00:30:19,480 --> 00:30:24,080
Speaker 1: that the people that know me individually know that I'm

545
00:30:24,120 --> 00:30:26,800
Speaker 1: pretty damn caring. So I would say I'm caring person.

546
00:30:27,000 --> 00:30:30,040
Speaker 1: I would say that all my friends that know me

547
00:30:30,120 --> 00:30:32,840
Speaker 1: know that when I say something I will do, I'm

548
00:30:32,880 --> 00:30:34,600
Speaker 1: a I stick with things to the hend. That would

549
00:30:34,600 --> 00:30:35,840
Speaker 1: be the second thing I would say. And the third

550
00:30:35,880 --> 00:30:39,680
Speaker 1: thing I would say is I legit love making people smile, right,

551
00:30:40,280 --> 00:30:43,480
Speaker 1: And so what we do with this I have a mirror.

552
00:30:43,520 --> 00:30:44,880
Speaker 1: It's a mirror that I look at every single day.

553
00:30:44,880 --> 00:30:46,959
Speaker 1: I right, get my goals right as mirrors. Mirrors get

554
00:30:46,960 --> 00:30:49,800
Speaker 1: a little bit dirty over time, and it's the same

555
00:30:49,840 --> 00:30:51,800
Speaker 1: thing within our life. In our life, our life can

556
00:30:51,840 --> 00:30:55,200
Speaker 1: get cluttered and you know, we start to lose sight

557
00:30:55,360 --> 00:30:58,520
Speaker 1: of who we are. But once you talk positive to yourself,

558
00:30:58,600 --> 00:31:00,640
Speaker 1: once you clean that mirror off, you can see who

559
00:31:00,720 --> 00:31:03,000
Speaker 1: you are at your core again. So that would be

560
00:31:03,080 --> 00:31:06,120
Speaker 1: a quick, a quick one. Why out of all the

561
00:31:06,200 --> 00:31:10,440
Speaker 1: topics that you could write about, why this one? Man?

562
00:31:10,480 --> 00:31:12,240
Speaker 1: I gotta say, I'm loving the hair, man, I'm loving

563
00:31:12,240 --> 00:31:19,920
Speaker 1: the hair. I love you, Bro. I just had to say, uh, well,

564
00:31:20,400 --> 00:31:23,960
Speaker 1: why out of all topics talk about this topic? Great question.

565
00:31:24,200 --> 00:31:27,120
Speaker 1: I think people like, Bro, you're on the TV, just

566
00:31:27,200 --> 00:31:29,080
Speaker 1: talk about TV. That's all we care to hear about you.

567
00:31:29,560 --> 00:31:31,840
Speaker 1: And to me, just like all of us, they're so

568
00:31:33,320 --> 00:31:35,760
Speaker 1: many different sides of us, and this is the side

569
00:31:35,880 --> 00:31:40,320
Speaker 1: that is I'm most passionate about. I with all of

570
00:31:40,400 --> 00:31:43,720
Speaker 1: my being believed that if you make someone else happy,

571
00:31:44,160 --> 00:31:47,760
Speaker 1: you make someone else smile, it makes you happy in return,

572
00:31:48,400 --> 00:31:50,400
Speaker 1: it makes the world a better place. And I think,

573
00:31:50,480 --> 00:31:53,240
Speaker 1: quite honestly, right now we all agree that the world

574
00:31:53,280 --> 00:31:56,440
Speaker 1: could be a better place, right and so um a

575
00:31:56,560 --> 00:32:00,560
Speaker 1: part of that is starting with ourselves knowing that we

576
00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:04,200
Speaker 1: are capable of amazing things. Except for being doing his

577
00:32:04,280 --> 00:32:07,000
Speaker 1: hair this morning. Yeah, I didn't do my hair this morning,

578
00:32:07,040 --> 00:32:10,200
Speaker 1: and in fact, uh, Mike, I've I've been running my

579
00:32:10,280 --> 00:32:11,920
Speaker 1: hands through it all day and it's standing up at

580
00:32:11,960 --> 00:32:16,520
Speaker 1: different different points. Uh. I love it well as a

581
00:32:16,600 --> 00:32:20,360
Speaker 1: listener out there, they obviously care about you, they respect you.

582
00:32:21,360 --> 00:32:26,560
Speaker 1: Um leaving this book. Outside of giving them the power

583
00:32:26,680 --> 00:32:29,560
Speaker 1: back and making them feel better, what do you hope

584
00:32:29,600 --> 00:32:38,240
Speaker 1: they gain? I hope people gain a concrete, a marble,

585
00:32:38,480 --> 00:32:40,760
Speaker 1: a diamond. Let's say, let's stick with diamond, because that's

586
00:32:40,760 --> 00:32:44,160
Speaker 1: the strongest, uh, forced demand. I hope that people have

587
00:32:44,280 --> 00:32:51,400
Speaker 1: a diamond understanding that you can and they fill in

588
00:32:51,440 --> 00:32:56,120
Speaker 1: the blank. Mhm. I believe it as simple as that.

589
00:32:56,520 --> 00:32:59,800
Speaker 1: It's like my book, I don't define what self love

590
00:32:59,880 --> 00:33:03,400
Speaker 1: is is. I let the individual define what that is themselves.

591
00:33:03,840 --> 00:33:05,800
Speaker 1: I give lots of examples, and I talked about it,

592
00:33:05,840 --> 00:33:07,760
Speaker 1: and I talk about what it means to me. But

593
00:33:07,840 --> 00:33:10,920
Speaker 1: I want people to have a diamond knowing that if

594
00:33:10,960 --> 00:33:13,080
Speaker 1: you love yourself, there's not nothing that on this earth

595
00:33:13,160 --> 00:33:16,280
Speaker 1: that you cannot do. You can have those courageous conversations

596
00:33:16,320 --> 00:33:18,920
Speaker 1: like I have my mother about my book and talking

597
00:33:18,960 --> 00:33:21,360
Speaker 1: about it, which was incredibly hard for me to do,

598
00:33:21,480 --> 00:33:24,840
Speaker 1: you know, talking to her about when my babysitter es

599
00:33:24,840 --> 00:33:28,120
Speaker 1: sexually harassing me, right, or talking to her about how

600
00:33:28,200 --> 00:33:30,000
Speaker 1: it made me feel when I had in my eyes

601
00:33:30,160 --> 00:33:33,680
Speaker 1: and cat scans because I was lashing out of my mother,

602
00:33:34,120 --> 00:33:37,400
Speaker 1: you know, when I did some illegal things that I

603
00:33:37,480 --> 00:33:41,520
Speaker 1: told you about offline that are pretty embarrassing for me. Uh,

604
00:33:43,120 --> 00:33:46,040
Speaker 1: to have those courage conversations. Know that you're Dimon and

605
00:33:47,160 --> 00:33:50,240
Speaker 1: we're all made wonderful. We just have to, you know,

606
00:33:50,480 --> 00:33:54,240
Speaker 1: go out and seek it. I feel like I'm preaching

607
00:33:54,400 --> 00:33:56,880
Speaker 1: right now. I'm not normally this guy. Right, this isn't

608
00:33:57,120 --> 00:34:00,520
Speaker 1: a side of me, but well, this isn't a side

609
00:34:00,560 --> 00:34:02,480
Speaker 1: that people have seen of me. This is all of me,

610
00:34:02,920 --> 00:34:05,120
Speaker 1: and it's just it's it's cool to show this side

611
00:34:05,160 --> 00:34:07,320
Speaker 1: of me. I like you person. I know that when

612
00:34:07,400 --> 00:34:09,560
Speaker 1: we did the in depth you talked about a very

613
00:34:09,680 --> 00:34:12,160
Speaker 1: dark period of your time where you honestly didn't leave

614
00:34:12,200 --> 00:34:15,440
Speaker 1: the house for about a year. Could when you when

615
00:34:15,480 --> 00:34:17,920
Speaker 1: you go look back and think about that, guy, like,

616
00:34:18,280 --> 00:34:20,160
Speaker 1: how cool is it to see where you are now

617
00:34:20,280 --> 00:34:25,160
Speaker 1: and what you're writing about? It makes me smile. It's

618
00:34:25,200 --> 00:34:28,239
Speaker 1: awesome too, because that guy was like, I lost like

619
00:34:28,280 --> 00:34:31,239
Speaker 1: twenty five pounds, I grew my hair out crazy. Um

620
00:34:31,640 --> 00:34:36,799
Speaker 1: my states account depleted to zero, having thousands in the day,

621
00:34:37,400 --> 00:34:42,879
Speaker 1: uh two, literally throwing up up when I went back

622
00:34:42,920 --> 00:34:46,400
Speaker 1: out and saw people. That's crazy for me, as everyone

623
00:34:46,480 --> 00:34:50,000
Speaker 1: knows me, is like, it's super a jovial individual. Thank

624
00:34:50,040 --> 00:34:51,520
Speaker 1: you asked me for bringing it up. When I came

625
00:34:51,560 --> 00:34:54,480
Speaker 1: out of that period of time, I literally hyperventilated and

626
00:34:54,560 --> 00:34:58,239
Speaker 1: threw up because I was around people. Right, It's just

627
00:34:58,440 --> 00:35:01,480
Speaker 1: blasphemy to me. It's crazy, it's obnoxious, and to be

628
00:35:01,640 --> 00:35:04,920
Speaker 1: here right now, I would just tell that dude again, Bro,

629
00:35:05,080 --> 00:35:07,239
Speaker 1: you're a diamond. You are strong, you are going to

630
00:35:07,320 --> 00:35:10,400
Speaker 1: get through this. You are absolutely made for this, and

631
00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:13,400
Speaker 1: it's just amazing to be here in this position right

632
00:35:13,440 --> 00:35:17,839
Speaker 1: now too. To go from that to this, Ben talks

633
00:35:17,880 --> 00:35:22,360
Speaker 1: about in his book about just the importance of connection

634
00:35:22,920 --> 00:35:25,360
Speaker 1: and how like it's just so tempting to kind of

635
00:35:25,520 --> 00:35:29,920
Speaker 1: retreat to your whole and just be alone, but that

636
00:35:30,280 --> 00:35:34,320
Speaker 1: is just going to make everything you're feeling worse. So

637
00:35:34,520 --> 00:35:36,759
Speaker 1: I like, you guys need to have some little like

638
00:35:36,880 --> 00:35:41,040
Speaker 1: a book joining moment here. Oh, I absolutely want to.

639
00:35:41,200 --> 00:35:43,479
Speaker 1: I honestly were going to bring up Beings that book

640
00:35:43,680 --> 00:35:46,520
Speaker 1: while being on this podcast. You guys, I think that

641
00:35:48,239 --> 00:35:51,080
Speaker 1: it is so easy, is absolutely right. It's so easy

642
00:35:51,200 --> 00:35:54,319
Speaker 1: for us to go into our whole. Right. That's why

643
00:35:54,880 --> 00:35:58,480
Speaker 1: in dating I'm so big or communication because in dating,

644
00:35:58,600 --> 00:36:00,920
Speaker 1: a lot of the times I'm using this as example.

645
00:36:01,160 --> 00:36:03,319
Speaker 1: You know, people know it's from a dating show, right,

646
00:36:03,560 --> 00:36:06,840
Speaker 1: and so I'm using this example in dating when we

647
00:36:07,000 --> 00:36:09,840
Speaker 1: feel down and or hurt from our partner and or

648
00:36:10,040 --> 00:36:12,840
Speaker 1: we hurt them. There are so many times where we

649
00:36:12,920 --> 00:36:17,640
Speaker 1: just want to withhold and just retreat, and that's not good.

650
00:36:18,280 --> 00:36:20,800
Speaker 1: And the same thing happens with ourselves. Right. When I

651
00:36:20,920 --> 00:36:22,560
Speaker 1: was in my deep period of time where I spent

652
00:36:22,680 --> 00:36:25,640
Speaker 1: like literally a year of my life in a hole, right,

653
00:36:25,880 --> 00:36:27,960
Speaker 1: I call it to myself. I say I was in prison.

654
00:36:28,000 --> 00:36:32,600
Speaker 1: I imprisoned myself, and that's not good. You know it's

655
00:36:32,680 --> 00:36:35,280
Speaker 1: not there. You know, no one wins from that situation,

656
00:36:35,440 --> 00:36:37,359
Speaker 1: no one, not You are the people that you can

657
00:36:37,800 --> 00:36:42,120
Speaker 1: impact in a positive manner. Mike Uh tell us a

658
00:36:42,120 --> 00:36:45,279
Speaker 1: little bit about the writing process. When did you start, Uh,

659
00:36:45,920 --> 00:36:49,480
Speaker 1: What was your kind of technique for walking through it

660
00:36:49,640 --> 00:36:51,640
Speaker 1: and making sure the words that you put on paper

661
00:36:51,840 --> 00:36:56,560
Speaker 1: matched what you were feeling and wanting in your heart. Yeah.

662
00:36:56,680 --> 00:37:01,320
Speaker 1: So when you just said that, I'll tell you what

663
00:37:01,400 --> 00:37:04,600
Speaker 1: happened to me when you said those words. I kind

664
00:37:04,640 --> 00:37:08,840
Speaker 1: of took a deep breath because I was reliving what

665
00:37:08,960 --> 00:37:12,319
Speaker 1: I call emotional homework. That's what me and my editor

666
00:37:12,400 --> 00:37:15,600
Speaker 1: call it. He would ask me like some really hard

667
00:37:15,719 --> 00:37:18,719
Speaker 1: questions and I'm like, damn, that's rude, but it was

668
00:37:19,239 --> 00:37:22,840
Speaker 1: it was needed for me to go into such a

669
00:37:22,880 --> 00:37:26,279
Speaker 1: deep place and so being to answer your question, I'm

670
00:37:26,320 --> 00:37:28,279
Speaker 1: not a writer by a trade, right, I think that

671
00:37:29,239 --> 00:37:32,520
Speaker 1: I've written an amazing book. Um. I hope that you guys,

672
00:37:32,600 --> 00:37:34,239
Speaker 1: you know, feel the same way after you read it,

673
00:37:34,320 --> 00:37:36,440
Speaker 1: and if not, please tell me how I can get better.

674
00:37:36,800 --> 00:37:40,640
Speaker 1: But I would say that I spent a lot of

675
00:37:40,719 --> 00:37:43,840
Speaker 1: writing time then in the wee hours of the morning.

676
00:37:44,600 --> 00:37:46,440
Speaker 1: I don't know why. I think it's just because I

677
00:37:46,480 --> 00:37:48,239
Speaker 1: feel like the world is asleep in the world can't

678
00:37:48,280 --> 00:37:51,640
Speaker 1: hear my thoughts. And so it was, it was, it

679
00:37:51,760 --> 00:37:54,080
Speaker 1: was it was subconscious for me to be up at

680
00:37:54,120 --> 00:37:58,000
Speaker 1: three thirty three in the morning, you know, writing down

681
00:37:58,320 --> 00:38:01,000
Speaker 1: my deepest things and or my most vulnerable moments, and

682
00:38:02,800 --> 00:38:04,719
Speaker 1: how I would talk to my best friend in the

683
00:38:04,920 --> 00:38:07,440
Speaker 1: entire world. And so for me, it was literally just

684
00:38:07,520 --> 00:38:10,080
Speaker 1: writing in the middle of the night. Um. If I

685
00:38:10,280 --> 00:38:13,680
Speaker 1: felt that I had writer's block, I would just stop writing.

686
00:38:14,360 --> 00:38:16,640
Speaker 1: There was The beauty of being self published is that

687
00:38:16,680 --> 00:38:19,759
Speaker 1: I have no time with right It's my book. I

688
00:38:19,840 --> 00:38:21,360
Speaker 1: do what I want when I want, And so I

689
00:38:21,400 --> 00:38:24,760
Speaker 1: would really walk away, get up, taking that go bs,

690
00:38:24,880 --> 00:38:27,480
Speaker 1: do something else, and then I would come back to it. Um,

691
00:38:27,960 --> 00:38:32,720
Speaker 1: and I would have conversations with friends about real stuff,

692
00:38:32,800 --> 00:38:36,640
Speaker 1: not about people, not about um what's going on new

693
00:38:36,680 --> 00:38:38,920
Speaker 1: is what did Kim Kardashian doing, but about real things

694
00:38:38,960 --> 00:38:42,560
Speaker 1: that's affecting, nealizing, affecting my lives. And via those conversations,

695
00:38:43,160 --> 00:38:48,080
Speaker 1: you know, I'm able to ascertain knowledge. So uh to

696
00:38:48,160 --> 00:38:51,920
Speaker 1: close up here, Mike things for sharing all that. And uh,

697
00:38:52,120 --> 00:38:54,879
Speaker 1: I know people out there anxious and waiting to get

698
00:38:54,920 --> 00:38:57,000
Speaker 1: their hands on this. When does it come out? Where

699
00:38:57,040 --> 00:38:59,640
Speaker 1: can they find it? And uh and how can they

700
00:38:59,680 --> 00:39:04,960
Speaker 1: best access this book that you have beautifully created? Thank

701
00:39:05,040 --> 00:39:08,600
Speaker 1: you man. Um. I feel like I just want to

702
00:39:08,640 --> 00:39:10,480
Speaker 1: hug you guys. I'm just really happy to see you guys.

703
00:39:10,520 --> 00:39:14,160
Speaker 1: You know so sweet, You're so cute. I'd hug you back.

704
00:39:18,160 --> 00:39:20,640
Speaker 1: You can go purchase my book on Mike johnson Smile

705
00:39:20,760 --> 00:39:23,120
Speaker 1: dot com, sign up for my newsletters. They'll also be

706
00:39:23,200 --> 00:39:25,520
Speaker 1: on Amazon. My book is called Making the Love You One.

707
00:39:26,120 --> 00:39:27,360
Speaker 1: My base is not in a cover up with my

708
00:39:27,440 --> 00:39:29,160
Speaker 1: book because this book is so much bigger than me.

709
00:39:29,480 --> 00:39:32,399
Speaker 1: I want people to know that it comes out October two,

710
00:39:32,960 --> 00:39:37,000
Speaker 1: this Friday, World Smile Day, not just America Smile Day,

711
00:39:37,000 --> 00:39:39,600
Speaker 1: not just My John Smile Day, but World Smile Day.

712
00:39:40,800 --> 00:39:43,239
Speaker 1: Let's do it so you know, we can't let you

713
00:39:43,320 --> 00:39:48,239
Speaker 1: go without talking about some Bachelor related things. You recently

714
00:39:48,640 --> 00:39:52,959
Speaker 1: said that, despite respecting and loving the whole production crew,

715
00:39:53,160 --> 00:39:56,080
Speaker 1: you have no desire to go back to Bachelor in Paradise,

716
00:39:56,360 --> 00:40:01,520
Speaker 1: So can you explain why. Yes, I'm glad you said that.

717
00:40:01,560 --> 00:40:03,239
Speaker 1: I really am glad that you said because some people

718
00:40:03,239 --> 00:40:06,120
Speaker 1: have like coming me when I said things that have

719
00:40:06,239 --> 00:40:08,560
Speaker 1: not been the most flattering in regards to the franchise.

720
00:40:08,760 --> 00:40:10,600
Speaker 1: And I appreciate you saying that because I have all

721
00:40:10,680 --> 00:40:12,960
Speaker 1: the love in the world for our franchise. Right, I

722
00:40:13,040 --> 00:40:15,600
Speaker 1: love you guys, love our franchise. You of all people

723
00:40:15,680 --> 00:40:19,680
Speaker 1: know I'm very honest though, and the reason I want

724
00:40:19,680 --> 00:40:26,560
Speaker 1: to go on Paradise again, is because I don't feel

725
00:40:26,600 --> 00:40:28,640
Speaker 1: like that's the best form for me to find my love.

726
00:40:29,760 --> 00:40:32,759
Speaker 1: And quite honestly, the point of going on the show

727
00:40:32,880 --> 00:40:36,520
Speaker 1: isn't it gain I g phone. The point of going

728
00:40:36,600 --> 00:40:40,040
Speaker 1: on the show is I fine your love. And that's

729
00:40:40,080 --> 00:40:43,719
Speaker 1: why I haven't been opposed to when people ask the

730
00:40:43,800 --> 00:40:46,440
Speaker 1: question about being the lead, because I feel I like

731
00:40:46,600 --> 00:40:50,719
Speaker 1: that round more so. I like being on the batch

732
00:40:50,840 --> 00:40:54,640
Speaker 1: read more so than Paradise. I feel like Paradise to

733
00:40:54,719 --> 00:40:59,400
Speaker 1: me was I felt like high school popularity contest. No,

734
00:40:59,520 --> 00:41:02,920
Speaker 1: I unders stand. I felt that Paradise, even though it's

735
00:41:02,960 --> 00:41:07,480
Speaker 1: where I found my love, it was far more emotional.

736
00:41:08,640 --> 00:41:11,440
Speaker 1: It's just like kind of like a wrecking process. But

737
00:41:11,600 --> 00:41:14,239
Speaker 1: when I look back on being on The Bachelor, it

738
00:41:14,400 --> 00:41:20,440
Speaker 1: was just fun. Yeah, a lot lighter, a lot lighter.

739
00:41:21,280 --> 00:41:26,440
Speaker 1: Agree with that, so much lighter. And yeah, that's why

740
00:41:26,480 --> 00:41:28,759
Speaker 1: I mean, it's not for me. But what's not for

741
00:41:28,880 --> 00:41:31,359
Speaker 1: me doesn't mean it's not for you. Obviously, you found

742
00:41:31,440 --> 00:41:34,600
Speaker 1: a wonderful guy in there who has the best jaw

743
00:41:34,840 --> 00:41:40,200
Speaker 1: in the world, right, so he's yes, he does. It's

744
00:41:40,239 --> 00:41:45,080
Speaker 1: just it's not it's not for me now of course. Um, yeah,

745
00:41:45,200 --> 00:41:47,440
Speaker 1: I'll just see like that now if they did Summer

746
00:41:47,560 --> 00:41:50,600
Speaker 1: Great Games, because Summer Games was canceled. Ben and I

747
00:41:50,760 --> 00:41:53,280
Speaker 1: know that that's a lot different than Bachelor in Paradise.

748
00:41:53,440 --> 00:41:56,799
Speaker 1: It's a lot um it's a lot more casual. It's

749
00:41:56,800 --> 00:41:58,440
Speaker 1: just kind of like, if it happens, it happens. It

750
00:41:58,560 --> 00:42:00,719
Speaker 1: just doesn't feel like it kind of feels like you're

751
00:42:00,719 --> 00:42:03,279
Speaker 1: there to be friends first and foremost and to like

752
00:42:03,520 --> 00:42:06,520
Speaker 1: have fun with competitions. Would you do something like Summer

753
00:42:06,560 --> 00:42:09,840
Speaker 1: Games or Winter Games again or ever not again? You

754
00:42:09,920 --> 00:42:13,680
Speaker 1: didn't do it? No, Yeah, that's my alley because like

755
00:42:13,800 --> 00:42:15,719
Speaker 1: when I go on a first date with the woman,

756
00:42:16,320 --> 00:42:18,320
Speaker 1: some things that I want to do was just be lighthearted,

757
00:42:18,480 --> 00:42:22,680
Speaker 1: be fun, doing activity to where like I'm trying to see,

758
00:42:22,760 --> 00:42:25,719
Speaker 1: like you know your comfort zone, right, I might take

759
00:42:25,800 --> 00:42:28,799
Speaker 1: you too. I fly right indoor sky down because it's fun,

760
00:42:28,880 --> 00:42:32,120
Speaker 1: it's activity. We're like friends in comparison to having an

761
00:42:32,200 --> 00:42:38,040
Speaker 1: interview deep questionnaire for six hours straight. Yeah, what makes

762
00:42:38,080 --> 00:42:40,960
Speaker 1: you laugh? That's what I want to know. Yeah. Yeah, Okay,

763
00:42:41,040 --> 00:42:43,640
Speaker 1: So you guys, it's not the end of possibly seeing

764
00:42:43,680 --> 00:42:46,160
Speaker 1: Mike Johnson on the show. Yeah, don't get too said yet.

765
00:42:46,480 --> 00:42:49,160
Speaker 1: You know, he could be back possibly one day somehow,

766
00:42:50,040 --> 00:42:55,280
Speaker 1: based on this conversation. Based on this conversation, it sounds

767
00:42:55,520 --> 00:42:58,279
Speaker 1: like you are still single. Can you like let us

768
00:42:58,360 --> 00:43:00,839
Speaker 1: in on the last time me went on a date?

769
00:43:01,719 --> 00:43:05,360
Speaker 1: What kind of has there been any little spark since

770
00:43:05,400 --> 00:43:09,320
Speaker 1: we've last seen you on the show. I feel comfortable

771
00:43:10,160 --> 00:43:14,960
Speaker 1: telling you, guys, someone just stayed with me here are

772
00:43:15,000 --> 00:43:18,320
Speaker 1: my place? And it wasn't Connor. They stayed. They stayed

773
00:43:18,400 --> 00:43:24,560
Speaker 1: for multiple days. Okay, so there's someone. There's someone. But

774
00:43:24,800 --> 00:43:26,880
Speaker 1: what city is she from? Is she gonna have to

775
00:43:26,960 --> 00:43:32,799
Speaker 1: be traveling? Interesting? I don't know. All right, Oh, thanks

776
00:43:32,800 --> 00:43:36,520
Speaker 1: for giving us that to smile on that guy's face

777
00:43:36,640 --> 00:43:40,160
Speaker 1: right now. Something happened. I don't know what assumptions, but

778
00:43:40,400 --> 00:43:46,600
Speaker 1: something happened in that guy smiling. National Smile Day, October three,

779
00:43:47,160 --> 00:43:50,520
Speaker 1: Mike Johnson's book comes out. Make sure to get it

780
00:43:50,600 --> 00:43:53,360
Speaker 1: on Amazon or Mike Johnson Smile dot com. Making You

781
00:43:55,040 --> 00:43:57,239
Speaker 1: Want by Mike Johnson. Mike, thanks for joining us, buddy,

782
00:43:58,160 --> 00:43:59,839
Speaker 1: Thank you guys, Love you guys, have a great day,

783
00:44:00,040 --> 00:44:11,600
Speaker 1: Love you buy. It's always good to catch up with Mike,

784
00:44:12,320 --> 00:44:14,879
Speaker 1: but we also love catching up with you. We're gonna

785
00:44:14,880 --> 00:44:17,320
Speaker 1: break down some listener emails. Please email us. Continue to

786
00:44:17,360 --> 00:44:20,239
Speaker 1: email us your thoughts, your opinions, uh, your concerns to

787
00:44:20,400 --> 00:44:22,160
Speaker 1: Ben and Ashley at I heeart meatia dot com, but

788
00:44:22,200 --> 00:44:26,640
Speaker 1: also follow us on Instagram at Almost Underscore Famous Podcast.

789
00:44:26,760 --> 00:44:30,960
Speaker 1: We will be updating that Instagram every week, uh and

790
00:44:31,080 --> 00:44:33,319
Speaker 1: kind of teasing the episodes and also breaking down any

791
00:44:33,440 --> 00:44:36,520
Speaker 1: further content needed. Yeah, you guys can d m us.

792
00:44:36,600 --> 00:44:38,440
Speaker 1: You can d m u s questions too, but we

793
00:44:38,640 --> 00:44:42,160
Speaker 1: love having these little behind the scenes questions to answer

794
00:44:42,200 --> 00:44:44,600
Speaker 1: for you guys every week, so keep them coming. First

795
00:44:44,680 --> 00:44:47,799
Speaker 1: email is from Shawnee. Is it true? The producers track

796
00:44:47,880 --> 00:44:51,080
Speaker 1: the contestants minstrel cycles and schedule their one on one

797
00:44:51,160 --> 00:44:54,440
Speaker 1: interview when they are most likely to be hormonal, emotional

798
00:44:54,560 --> 00:44:58,560
Speaker 1: wreck Ashley. I don't know about this. You on. I

799
00:44:58,680 --> 00:45:00,919
Speaker 1: think this has to be something sort of fake news.

800
00:45:01,400 --> 00:45:05,840
Speaker 1: I don't know where you heard this, Shawnnie. Now I'm wondering.

801
00:45:05,960 --> 00:45:08,600
Speaker 1: Did I ever fill out a questionnaire about when my

802
00:45:08,719 --> 00:45:15,960
Speaker 1: last period was? That would be insane? I don't what

803
00:45:16,520 --> 00:45:20,200
Speaker 1: I never did. Oh no, you never filled that out? Um,

804
00:45:20,719 --> 00:45:24,799
Speaker 1: I don't know. I mean like maybe we did during

805
00:45:24,920 --> 00:45:27,480
Speaker 1: Like we don't do a physical, but we do like

806
00:45:27,640 --> 00:45:31,120
Speaker 1: have to get blood drawn and stuff and in that paperwork,

807
00:45:31,760 --> 00:45:35,560
Speaker 1: I may have filed something out. But you guys, they

808
00:45:35,760 --> 00:45:39,279
Speaker 1: schedule interviews with you, one on one interviews every single day,

809
00:45:40,000 --> 00:45:42,360
Speaker 1: So it's not like they're like, oh, but this is

810
00:45:42,440 --> 00:45:44,080
Speaker 1: the one that we're gonna get and it's going to

811
00:45:44,160 --> 00:45:48,839
Speaker 1: be super good. I don't really believe this. That would

812
00:45:48,880 --> 00:45:51,359
Speaker 1: be really extra. I mean, I guess I wouldn't rule

813
00:45:51,400 --> 00:45:53,759
Speaker 1: it out, but like, I don't think they revolve the

814
00:45:53,800 --> 00:45:59,200
Speaker 1: schedule around periods. The Bachelor isn't as like dark and twisted,

815
00:45:59,280 --> 00:46:02,440
Speaker 1: as like a fake. It's not. It's like very much okay.

816
00:46:02,600 --> 00:46:04,959
Speaker 1: It's not like I don't feel unsafe going on the show.

817
00:46:05,239 --> 00:46:07,480
Speaker 1: I don't feel like they're trying to ruin me. I

818
00:46:07,840 --> 00:46:11,600
Speaker 1: never felt that well. I mean, the number one behind

819
00:46:11,680 --> 00:46:14,879
Speaker 1: the scenes question I get asked is do they try

820
00:46:14,920 --> 00:46:17,279
Speaker 1: to throw alcohol down your throat? And I'm like, no,

821
00:46:18,560 --> 00:46:21,440
Speaker 1: not at all. Never once did they say like can

822
00:46:21,480 --> 00:46:24,560
Speaker 1: I get you something? Like if you want something, you

823
00:46:24,600 --> 00:46:26,399
Speaker 1: can be like, oh, can you grab me memosa? I'd

824
00:46:26,400 --> 00:46:30,120
Speaker 1: love that, thank you. But they're never like I think

825
00:46:30,200 --> 00:46:33,680
Speaker 1: you could use another one. It's not like they're in

826
00:46:33,800 --> 00:46:36,279
Speaker 1: the fact of like there's an open bar in the

827
00:46:36,800 --> 00:46:39,560
Speaker 1: interview room. People make it seem like there's like they

828
00:46:39,600 --> 00:46:41,680
Speaker 1: have a bar car in the interview room. No. I

829
00:46:41,760 --> 00:46:47,000
Speaker 1: actually remember them like telling me no often, Like if

830
00:46:47,040 --> 00:46:48,640
Speaker 1: I was like, hey, can I get a drink for

831
00:46:48,719 --> 00:46:51,600
Speaker 1: this interview, They're like, nah, Like not tonight, Uh you

832
00:46:51,680 --> 00:46:53,560
Speaker 1: got an early morning, Like I remember them saying that.

833
00:46:53,680 --> 00:46:55,440
Speaker 1: I never remember them going, hey, you should have like

834
00:46:55,480 --> 00:46:57,480
Speaker 1: a few shots before you talk to us tonight, Like

835
00:46:58,880 --> 00:47:02,120
Speaker 1: that never happened. And honestly I never needed this, Like

836
00:47:02,280 --> 00:47:07,560
Speaker 1: once you get into this, like the regiment of interviewing

837
00:47:07,640 --> 00:47:10,520
Speaker 1: so often and opening up your heart and being so vulnerable,

838
00:47:10,600 --> 00:47:13,600
Speaker 1: you don't need alcohol to be vulnerable or to cry

839
00:47:13,719 --> 00:47:21,040
Speaker 1: or anything like that. Actually, you're not that I ever YEA. Hey,

840
00:47:21,160 --> 00:47:24,400
Speaker 1: next email is one that we want to broach because

841
00:47:24,640 --> 00:47:27,400
Speaker 1: we appreciate this person coming in. We're gonna keep it anonymous,

842
00:47:27,880 --> 00:47:30,400
Speaker 1: but we do appreciate this email and the vulnerability behind it.

843
00:47:30,480 --> 00:47:32,160
Speaker 1: I think we can answer it to the best of

844
00:47:32,200 --> 00:47:37,240
Speaker 1: our abilities. But um, the listener writes, my husband recently

845
00:47:37,280 --> 00:47:40,120
Speaker 1: admitted to me that he has had a sexual attraction

846
00:47:40,520 --> 00:47:43,000
Speaker 1: to another woman that we know for the past six years.

847
00:47:43,440 --> 00:47:46,200
Speaker 1: He told me that he's never acted upon it, and

848
00:47:46,280 --> 00:47:49,480
Speaker 1: I do believe him. He's been brutally honest with me

849
00:47:49,719 --> 00:47:52,440
Speaker 1: and very communicative. He told me that he loves me

850
00:47:52,560 --> 00:47:54,960
Speaker 1: so much and he feels satisfied with our relationship, but

851
00:47:55,200 --> 00:47:58,400
Speaker 1: still has an attraction to this person. We plan on

852
00:47:58,560 --> 00:48:00,640
Speaker 1: entering therapy together, but I guess I feel like I

853
00:48:00,760 --> 00:48:03,879
Speaker 1: don't know how to move forward from here. If it's

854
00:48:03,920 --> 00:48:08,080
Speaker 1: been this long, it's clearly not going away. How can

855
00:48:08,120 --> 00:48:11,480
Speaker 1: I ever feel confident? How can I ever stop wondering

856
00:48:11,560 --> 00:48:14,480
Speaker 1: if he's thinking about her when we're intimate together. I'd

857
00:48:14,480 --> 00:48:17,440
Speaker 1: appreciate any advice from both of you on how you

858
00:48:17,600 --> 00:48:21,800
Speaker 1: battled those insecurities and feelings uh like you're enough for

859
00:48:22,000 --> 00:48:24,640
Speaker 1: your spouse. So I don't think Ashley and I have

860
00:48:24,760 --> 00:48:27,120
Speaker 1: maybe entered into this exact scenario, but I think the

861
00:48:27,280 --> 00:48:30,520
Speaker 1: last sentence is relatable to all of us. Um not

862
00:48:30,840 --> 00:48:34,279
Speaker 1: feeling enough and having insecurities within a relationship. Those are

863
00:48:34,360 --> 00:48:36,600
Speaker 1: things that that all of us have felt and that

864
00:48:36,680 --> 00:48:38,560
Speaker 1: we've had to work through. Ashley, do you want to

865
00:48:38,760 --> 00:48:40,759
Speaker 1: kind of broach this first? Do you want me to try?

866
00:48:41,200 --> 00:48:44,200
Speaker 1: I want you to try. So how I go about

867
00:48:44,280 --> 00:48:50,879
Speaker 1: this is um one there is with all we know here,

868
00:48:50,960 --> 00:48:54,640
Speaker 1: there is an honesty Uh, that is admirable on his

869
00:48:54,760 --> 00:48:56,880
Speaker 1: part to open up to you and tell you this,

870
00:48:57,480 --> 00:49:01,680
Speaker 1: I think in a partnership. Um, in fact, you know,

871
00:49:01,760 --> 00:49:03,200
Speaker 1: I'll go about this way. I have one of my

872
00:49:03,280 --> 00:49:06,400
Speaker 1: best buddies admitted this to his wife, not in a

873
00:49:06,480 --> 00:49:08,480
Speaker 1: six years and but he said, hey, I you know,

874
00:49:08,520 --> 00:49:11,360
Speaker 1: I'm realizing that I'm having eyes for other people and

875
00:49:11,440 --> 00:49:13,480
Speaker 1: I don't like it and I don't want this, but

876
00:49:13,560 --> 00:49:14,759
Speaker 1: I need to tell you this so that you can

877
00:49:14,840 --> 00:49:16,719
Speaker 1: help me through it. And she did. She owned that

878
00:49:16,800 --> 00:49:18,680
Speaker 1: with him and said, hey, what do I need to do?

879
00:49:18,800 --> 00:49:22,799
Speaker 1: What can we do together to help you, uh, get

880
00:49:22,960 --> 00:49:25,640
Speaker 1: through this? Because this isn't something I know you want.

881
00:49:25,719 --> 00:49:27,120
Speaker 1: I know you don't want to be looking at other people.

882
00:49:27,120 --> 00:49:28,200
Speaker 1: I know you don't want to be thinking about this

883
00:49:28,239 --> 00:49:30,400
Speaker 1: about other people. And it's better for a relationship. So

884
00:49:30,920 --> 00:49:33,320
Speaker 1: there is a partnership here that I think is is

885
00:49:33,400 --> 00:49:35,400
Speaker 1: admirable on both of your parts to stay together, but

886
00:49:35,480 --> 00:49:38,719
Speaker 1: also for him to be communicative. I don't I want

887
00:49:38,719 --> 00:49:41,440
Speaker 1: to be honest, I don't think this is super uncommon now.

888
00:49:41,480 --> 00:49:44,000
Speaker 1: I don't know to the extent of the sexual attraction happened,

889
00:49:44,040 --> 00:49:46,120
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't know that scale. And and what

890
00:49:46,320 --> 00:49:49,120
Speaker 1: was thought of. But I don't think it is uncommon

891
00:49:49,239 --> 00:49:54,439
Speaker 1: for people, uh in relationships too at times go Wow,

892
00:49:54,840 --> 00:49:58,520
Speaker 1: that person is incredibly attractive. Now acting upon it is different,

893
00:49:58,560 --> 00:50:00,359
Speaker 1: and then think letting your mind go to a place

894
00:50:00,400 --> 00:50:03,880
Speaker 1: that's a healthy um is a boundary that that personally,

895
00:50:03,920 --> 00:50:07,080
Speaker 1: I think would be healthy to set. So yeah, that's

896
00:50:07,120 --> 00:50:09,480
Speaker 1: where I feel like I have a little something to say.

897
00:50:09,600 --> 00:50:11,879
Speaker 1: I mean, I'll go out with my girlfriends and we'll talk.

898
00:50:11,920 --> 00:50:14,000
Speaker 1: I'll be like, oh he's hot, Oh he's hot, Like

899
00:50:14,080 --> 00:50:16,520
Speaker 1: we'll talk about hot guys still do because I'm married.

900
00:50:16,840 --> 00:50:19,719
Speaker 1: I'm not blind, But it doesn't mean it means that,

901
00:50:19,840 --> 00:50:24,600
Speaker 1: like you find them attractive, but you don't have any

902
00:50:24,760 --> 00:50:28,840
Speaker 1: intent or desire to act on that attraction. And I

903
00:50:29,000 --> 00:50:31,200
Speaker 1: also think there's a difference between acknowledging like, oh that

904
00:50:31,239 --> 00:50:34,440
Speaker 1: person is hot, they're fun to look at, versus, um,

905
00:50:34,760 --> 00:50:37,320
Speaker 1: I'm daydreaming about that person, like I'm thinking about that

906
00:50:37,400 --> 00:50:41,560
Speaker 1: person romantically. And I think that's what our listener listeners

907
00:50:41,680 --> 00:50:45,360
Speaker 1: husband is doing. And and and let's go with that

908
00:50:45,480 --> 00:50:47,480
Speaker 1: because I don't know right that that doesn't go in

909
00:50:47,600 --> 00:50:51,760
Speaker 1: enough detail for us to know this. However, Uh, here's

910
00:50:51,960 --> 00:50:54,759
Speaker 1: my advice to you uh, and it sounds like you're

911
00:50:54,760 --> 00:50:56,759
Speaker 1: doing it from your email. You have to communicate, and

912
00:50:56,800 --> 00:50:59,080
Speaker 1: I think an open line of communication and within this

913
00:50:59,480 --> 00:51:02,680
Speaker 1: is now necessary. I think if I was your husband

914
00:51:02,719 --> 00:51:04,560
Speaker 1: who had admitted this to you, and you told me

915
00:51:04,680 --> 00:51:07,279
Speaker 1: as we were intimate together that hey, you're worried about

916
00:51:07,320 --> 00:51:09,759
Speaker 1: what I'm thinking about or who I'm thinking about, I

917
00:51:09,880 --> 00:51:11,680
Speaker 1: think you should tell him that. And I think a

918
00:51:11,800 --> 00:51:14,840
Speaker 1: good partner with an understanding partner, especially with look at

919
00:51:14,880 --> 00:51:17,600
Speaker 1: you and go I get I get why because this

920
00:51:17,800 --> 00:51:19,600
Speaker 1: was something that I put on you, and this is

921
00:51:19,640 --> 00:51:23,200
Speaker 1: the way I put on you, and let's work through this. Um.

922
00:51:23,760 --> 00:51:26,359
Speaker 1: You might need more validation now than maybe you would

923
00:51:26,360 --> 00:51:29,200
Speaker 1: if this was never said to you. There's insecurities that

924
00:51:29,320 --> 00:51:31,719
Speaker 1: came up because of his openness to you that you

925
00:51:31,800 --> 00:51:34,920
Speaker 1: never thought you'd have to deal with, and and a partnership,

926
00:51:35,040 --> 00:51:37,640
Speaker 1: I would just imagine that both people are better when

927
00:51:37,800 --> 00:51:40,359
Speaker 1: there is that open line of communication because you're only

928
00:51:40,480 --> 00:51:42,440
Speaker 1: doing it. I mean, the goal is that you're doing

929
00:51:42,480 --> 00:51:44,560
Speaker 1: it to mend and to get back to a place

930
00:51:44,600 --> 00:51:48,360
Speaker 1: of healthiness and happiness and fulfillment and enjoy within your relationship.

931
00:51:48,680 --> 00:51:51,640
Speaker 1: And if that is the intent with your communication, that

932
00:51:51,680 --> 00:51:54,160
Speaker 1: I don't think much can go wrong. I think that

933
00:51:54,560 --> 00:51:56,759
Speaker 1: if you're speaking to him and communicating with him and saying, hey,

934
00:51:56,840 --> 00:51:58,840
Speaker 1: I'm worried about this, and I'm only worried about it

935
00:51:58,880 --> 00:52:01,640
Speaker 1: because I want you to want me, and I want

936
00:52:01,680 --> 00:52:02,960
Speaker 1: you to desire me, and I want you to think

937
00:52:03,000 --> 00:52:07,160
Speaker 1: about me. Ask him, let him, let him respond. Uh.

938
00:52:08,120 --> 00:52:10,640
Speaker 1: But I do also want you to know that you

939
00:52:10,680 --> 00:52:12,960
Speaker 1: should feel confident in relationship because you two are together

940
00:52:13,000 --> 00:52:15,000
Speaker 1: and you're trying to work it through, and you are

941
00:52:15,080 --> 00:52:18,320
Speaker 1: desirable and you are desired and uh, and for that,

942
00:52:19,160 --> 00:52:21,120
Speaker 1: I think, actually I are wishing you the best. This

943
00:52:21,280 --> 00:52:25,160
Speaker 1: is tough, this isn't easy. But but if you're feeling

944
00:52:25,200 --> 00:52:28,640
Speaker 1: alone and like you're the only one out there experiencing this,

945
00:52:29,200 --> 00:52:32,239
Speaker 1: I can promise you that this isn't an isolated event

946
00:52:32,360 --> 00:52:35,920
Speaker 1: that there there. This isn't uncommon. It doesn't take away

947
00:52:36,280 --> 00:52:39,759
Speaker 1: from the pains that you're feeling, but this isn't uncommon. Yeah,

948
00:52:39,880 --> 00:52:41,920
Speaker 1: And I wish that I had more advice on this,

949
00:52:42,120 --> 00:52:45,440
Speaker 1: especially since this person probably reached out being like, actually,

950
00:52:45,560 --> 00:52:48,640
Speaker 1: must have insecurities because of the way that Ashley and

951
00:52:48,760 --> 00:52:52,760
Speaker 1: Jared's relationship started. I don't have a I don't really

952
00:52:52,840 --> 00:52:55,360
Speaker 1: have a lot um and a lot of it is

953
00:52:55,360 --> 00:52:58,719
Speaker 1: just healed over time. And I think that it's just

954
00:52:58,960 --> 00:53:02,760
Speaker 1: like as simple as being open and honest, um, giving

955
00:53:02,800 --> 00:53:05,480
Speaker 1: a time and just yeah, what Ben said, the fact

956
00:53:05,560 --> 00:53:07,680
Speaker 1: that he's wanting to work through this, it should be

957
00:53:07,719 --> 00:53:11,759
Speaker 1: a great sign for you. Hey, what a podcast. We

958
00:53:11,800 --> 00:53:14,719
Speaker 1: appreciate you writing in, Thanks for your honesty, thanks for

959
00:53:14,920 --> 00:53:18,200
Speaker 1: connecting us all. Uh. We'll be back this week with

960
00:53:18,360 --> 00:53:21,280
Speaker 1: an in depth with Sean and Catherine. It's gonna be awesome.

961
00:53:21,400 --> 00:53:23,239
Speaker 1: It's gonna be really great. We'll be posting that by

962
00:53:23,280 --> 00:53:25,319
Speaker 1: the end of this week and then we're back next

963
00:53:25,400 --> 00:53:28,080
Speaker 1: week on Monday. As we get closer and closer, I

964
00:53:28,120 --> 00:53:31,680
Speaker 1: think that is going to be our official last offseason podcast.

965
00:53:34,239 --> 00:53:38,480
Speaker 1: So exciting, absolutely crazy, makes our jobs easier and makes

966
00:53:38,520 --> 00:53:41,200
Speaker 1: our jobs even more fun than we already have. Hey,

967
00:53:41,920 --> 00:53:44,839
Speaker 1: with that, I've been Ben, I've been Ashley. We'll talk

968
00:53:44,840 --> 00:53:48,279
Speaker 1: to you soon. Stil next time followed the Benn and

969
00:53:48,320 --> 00:53:52,080
Speaker 1: Ashley I Almost Famous podcast on iHeart Radio or subscribe

970
00:53:52,120 --> 00:53:53,680
Speaker 1: wherever you listen to podcasts.