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Speaker 1: Today, we call a father whose six year old son

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Speaker 1: is having a big birthday bash this weekend, and his

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Speaker 1: parents hired one of those animal entertainers to come by

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Speaker 1: with some toads and lizards. Cool you a little educational

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Speaker 1: show in town. But there's been a change of plans

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Speaker 1: because the wife decided she wants to reach out to

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Speaker 1: us and say, Fred the frog Guy is being replaced.

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Speaker 1: Oh you're going to find out with who in your

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Speaker 1: brand new phone? Tap right now?

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Speaker 2: Another on the twenties. Hi is this matt O. My

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Speaker 2: name's Clara. I'm the assistant to Fred the frog Guy.

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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, hey, how you doing well?

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Speaker 2: Actually we're supposed to say ribbet to each other, so

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Speaker 2: you go first. Oh is that all you got? How

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Speaker 2: about this ribbit?

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Speaker 3: What good?

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Speaker 2: Ribbet back at you?

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Speaker 3: So how gonna help you today? Well?

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Speaker 2: I know your kid's birthday party is on Saturday, and

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Speaker 2: I am so sorry to let you know that Fred

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Speaker 2: won't be able to make it.

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Speaker 3: Oh no, wow, okay, what's uh? Yeah, just going on.

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Speaker 2: He's got a grand issue apparently. I mean, he claims

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Speaker 2: it's not from touching tongues with a certain Amazon milk frog,

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Speaker 2: but my god, we all think a little differently.

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Speaker 3: It's wow, is he in the hospital?

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Speaker 2: He's definitely on a trip, but not to the hospital.

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Speaker 3: Okay, I mean.

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Speaker 2: It sounds like you haven't heard of that, like internet

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Speaker 2: rumor that says you can suck the farts out of

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Speaker 2: those things. Then all of a sudden, everything you see

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Speaker 2: is pink.

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Speaker 3: What are you talking about? Is that a real thing?

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Speaker 2: Me and the crew haven't tried it, but we could

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Speaker 2: do it after the party if you like.

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Speaker 3: You know, no, no, no, thank.

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Speaker 2: You, but little bonus at the end of the night.

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Speaker 3: No, no, that won't be necessary. And I don't think

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Speaker 3: there's gonna be a party now. If you're seeing Fred's out, Oh.

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Speaker 2: No, I mean Fred's out, but the party's on.

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Speaker 3: Okay. Are you who's going to be covering for Fred?

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Speaker 2: Then yours truly?

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Speaker 1: What?

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Speaker 2: Oh? Yeah?

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Speaker 3: So okay, so you're qualified to cover for Fred? Then

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Speaker 3: am I qualified?

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Speaker 2: I have been waiting for this moment for years and

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Speaker 2: I have some special surprises for your kids. Party planned?

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Speaker 3: What surprises? What surprises? Look? I just want to make

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Speaker 3: sure I have a party. I don't want to add

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Speaker 3: anything crazy into the mix.

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Speaker 2: Are you sitting down because this is exciting?

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Speaker 3: Yes? I am sitting down.

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Speaker 2: Okay, we just got a new snapping turtle shipped in

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Speaker 2: from that a GASCAR, and we've been wanting one of

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Speaker 2: those for months.

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Speaker 3: A snapping turtle. I yes, don't it doesn't sound like

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Speaker 3: a smart item to have around a bunch of kids

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Speaker 3: with him.

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Speaker 2: No, we call them fingers because it's his favorite thing

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Speaker 2: to eat.

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Speaker 3: That do No, see that doesn't sound at all. Oh don't.

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Speaker 2: There's nothing to worry about. We made him a little

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Speaker 2: muzzle out of dental floss and scotch tape. I'm pretty

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Speaker 2: sure it'll hold.

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Speaker 3: A muzzled No. Yeah, no, I'm sorry. This is not

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Speaker 3: This is not what we were asking for.

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Speaker 2: Are you worried about the money because we are not

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Speaker 2: charging uxor.

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Speaker 3: It's not about the money. It's about whatever you have

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Speaker 3: planned here being safe for kids to be around. I

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Speaker 3: mean yeah, yeah, no, not meant to be risky.

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Speaker 2: Safeties first, and that's why we created this tiny little

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Speaker 2: saddle for him, because the kids are gonna ride on

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Speaker 2: the back. No.

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Speaker 3: I need you to figure this out and get on

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Speaker 3: the same page with me this.

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Speaker 2: You're telling me your kid wouldn't want to ride a

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Speaker 2: turtle named fingers.

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Speaker 3: I mean probably, yes, I don't know if I'm not

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Speaker 3: gonna find out either. Why do you write?

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Speaker 2: One thing you're not considering is parents and kids alike.

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Speaker 2: They are going to point to you with all five

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Speaker 2: digits because they're still going to have them. They're going

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Speaker 2: to point to you and they're gonna say that guy

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Speaker 2: through the party of the year.

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Speaker 3: Okay, I don't care about that at all.

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Speaker 2: What other animal entertainer is going to have your little

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Speaker 2: boy in a bathtub of box jellyfish looking for his

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Speaker 2: party price?

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Speaker 3: What box jellyfish?

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Speaker 2: No, listen, I don't think I told you. I will

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Speaker 2: be equipped with two stun guns and if you high

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Speaker 2: octane nitrous injectors.

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Speaker 3: Okay, I'm sorry. This is way way more intent than

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Speaker 3: what you had listed on the website. And yeah, it

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Speaker 3: is not what we signed up for. I thought we

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Speaker 3: were talking about frogs, toads or whatever boring things.

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Speaker 2: Is that what you're talking about.

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Speaker 3: It's not boring, It's just meant to be, you know,

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Speaker 3: enjoyable and safe. I mean, I'm not taking these kids

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Speaker 3: to the Everglades.

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Speaker 2: I just always like to think what would the guys

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Speaker 2: from Jackass do if they owned a mobile petting zoo

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Speaker 2: for reptiles.

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Speaker 3: They would be soon and they would be out of business,

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Speaker 3: just like you're about to be. I'm like two seconds

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Speaker 3: away from calling the cops right now.

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Speaker 2: You don't need to call the cops. All you need

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Speaker 2: to do is call your wife, Robin. Okay, what she's

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Speaker 2: the one that set you up for this prank phone call?

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Speaker 3: You have to be Oh my god, this is actually.

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Speaker 2: Broke from the radio show Brick and Jeffrey in the Morning.

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Speaker 2: We're doing a phone tap on you. Oh, come on

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Speaker 2: your wife, Robins. Does she just want to say thank you,

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Speaker 2: you know, for all the help you've done organizing your

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Speaker 2: kid's birthday party.

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Speaker 3: I gotta go.

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Speaker 2: I gotta go too, because I've already loaded about fifteen

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Speaker 2: Australian brown snakes into the truck, got an eighteen month

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Speaker 2: old twin birthday party down the street. Gonna let them

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Speaker 2: loosen their play pads. Okay, yeah, see which one survived?

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Speaker 3: That sounds great? Well.

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Speaker 2: Wake Up Every Morning was fun Tabs Weekday Morning on

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Speaker 2: the twenties, Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning