Speaker 1: Welcome to We Talk Back podcast, the production of iHeartRadio
Speaker 1: and the Black Effect Network.
Speaker 2: Talk or Talk Talk to. We're just two unapologetically black
Speaker 2: women with an opinion who talks. What's up, y'all? Thank
Speaker 2: you for tuning in for a new episode that We
Speaker 2: Talk Black, a show dedicated to these niggas in these hoes.
Speaker 2: Oh not the niggas that we talked black for Black
Speaker 2: History Month. Okay, now, hey y'all, it's Tan Van. I
Speaker 2: love y'all. I feel like I haven't been telling them
Speaker 2: I loved him a couple of weeks, but I do
Speaker 2: love y'all. I want to remind y'all that you are
Speaker 2: very much loved by We love you too. AJ. How'd you?
Speaker 2: And was about nothing? Child? Line? Do shit? And I
Speaker 2: can't wait till this weekend to not do shit? You're
Speaker 2: not gonna watch the super Bowl? Is that this week Oh? Yeah,
Speaker 2: I'm definite gonna try to find me a little kickback
Speaker 2: this weekend. Yeah, I'm into this weekend. I forgot I
Speaker 2: did do it. Haven't been following I noticed the forty
Speaker 2: nine ers, the red team and the Blue team. Is
Speaker 2: that really? Who's going to the Super Bowl? A red
Speaker 2: team and a blue team. So I know, I know
Speaker 2: there's a red one, the Chiefs. The Chiefs, well they're red,
Speaker 2: the forty nine ers. What color are they are? They blue?
Speaker 2: Red team? Right? Okay, then it's red. It gets red,
Speaker 2: so it's Chiefs. It's a blood. It's a blood super
Speaker 2: Bowl that was done, y'all. Ain't sure we know what
Speaker 2: the fuck we talk about. Y'all can tell we don't
Speaker 2: watch sports like that. It's the cheese, Travis Kel I need.
Speaker 2: It's Taylor Swift. So I thought he played for the
Speaker 2: forty nine Ers. I'm wrong. He played for the Chiefs.
Speaker 2: Oh nah, I know that. So this is Taylor Swift's
Speaker 2: first Super Bowl apparently, I just hit yeah, So it's
Speaker 2: two red teens. I just hate, uh how they got
Speaker 2: her taken over. Goddamn NFL man, this is just disgusting.
Speaker 2: She didn't do it though, she just supporting her dude,
Speaker 2: and everybody just making it about her. She has literally
Speaker 2: come in and they have tried to take over swagsurfing
Speaker 2: and also fades at this point. Okay, well you saw
Speaker 2: the swag surf. Ain't no way they taking it over
Speaker 2: because that shit was very was thirty. It was thirty
Speaker 2: at all and in the fade. That is the funniest
Speaker 2: shit to me. It's just it's how America was founded.
Speaker 2: It stupid Internet new period, that's what the fuck America's
Speaker 2: founded on on a motherfucker trying to say they started
Speaker 2: something that they didn't you name. I guess we're in
Speaker 2: stupid internet news. Travis Kelsey came out and said, like, uh,
Speaker 2: I don't do that to me. I did not invent
Speaker 2: that shit ever. People invent that shit. It's black history, mind.
Speaker 2: I don't want no problems. Stop playing with whar he's won.
Speaker 2: They was on some dumb shit man February one. They
Speaker 2: don't care about us. All the white boys going to
Speaker 2: get the Travis Kelsey, that's a boosty say he find now,
Speaker 2: I go, lie, I much can lie. He is nice looking,
Speaker 2: nice to look at. I don't even see him with
Speaker 2: Taylor Swift for real, Like I don't know who she's
Speaker 2: supposed to be. But he got a little bit too
Speaker 2: much swag for tailors. He got swag. That's why I
Speaker 2: say I don't think he I don't find him attractive.
Speaker 2: I just think he's got a lot of swag. Because
Speaker 2: if you cut that beard off and you've seen him
Speaker 2: without the meatles. He like male Paul buyan As looking white,
Speaker 2: brownie man, that's what he makes Johnny Ella seed for sure. Shame.
Speaker 2: Let's talk about the Grammys. That's what I did. I
Speaker 2: watched the Grammys. I enjoyed the Grammys this year. Did
Speaker 2: you I didn't watch He's gonna be watching TV JA,
Speaker 2: I didn't watch you, lay, I am lying. I let
Speaker 2: my hookah. I had me a bottle of champagne and
Speaker 2: I just watched the Grammys. I was singing. Fantasia made
Speaker 2: me so proud. She looks so good. I'm just so
Speaker 2: happy for her too. Yeah, she's like getting all the
Speaker 2: accolades she has always deserved. Who else? Oh, Tracy Chapman
Speaker 2: and I love that song. I love that remake fast, Yes,
Speaker 2: what's the Guy's what's the guy? I don't know? Also
Speaker 2: got that shit every single day comes on the radio.
Speaker 2: I listened to that song. I love that. Yeah, that's songs.
Speaker 2: And she looks so amazing. She looked good, She's aging
Speaker 2: so beautifully. Them dimples aren't the thing is I never
Speaker 2: realized that was her song. I didn't realize that when
Speaker 2: they was playing with that shit on a living Color.
Speaker 2: I didn't. I didn't realize that was a black woman's song. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: what God they had the sister playing her playing that
Speaker 2: character in Living Color girl. I have no idea. What
Speaker 2: you don't remember them doing that on Living Color, playing
Speaker 2: and doing that song when the Living Color I don't know.
Speaker 2: That's why I was able to watch him Living Color yet?
Speaker 2: What your mommy? Lets you watch a kid? I was little? Okay,
Speaker 2: I'm thinking about deaf comedy jam even deaf comedy jamiot Like,
Speaker 2: what how old are you again? Never mind? So let's
Speaker 2: keep playing. Yeah you might have been born Yeah I
Speaker 2: was little. Yeah, you're right to that part. And Living Color?
Speaker 2: What's that? So you never seen Martin either? I love
Speaker 2: that show. I watched all the reruns. Shame. So the Grammy, y'all,
Speaker 2: let's get into it right quick. So jay Z won
Speaker 2: one of the most prominent awards. I would say at
Speaker 2: the Grammy's Grammys. Maybe it's named at the Doctor Dre
Speaker 2: is that Doctor Dre Global Impact Award, And in the
Speaker 2: midst of his acceptance speech, he goes on to call
Speaker 2: it the Grammys about how his wife ain't never one
Speaker 2: album of the year. She got thirty sounds Grammys, but
Speaker 2: for whatever reason, she keeps getting snubbed for Album of
Speaker 2: the Year, while Taylor Swift won this past Sunday, that's
Speaker 2: her fourth Grammy for Album of the Year. Ed labed
Speaker 2: me to go listen to some Tailor Swift music. I
Speaker 2: had to see what the fuck they be hearing. I
Speaker 2: hear this shit on the radio. She doesn't have any
Speaker 2: albums we could just listen straight through either. And I
Speaker 2: feel like Beyonce has had several albums, especially Lemonade, she
Speaker 2: should have gotten a Grammy for and she should have
Speaker 2: called Beyonce on the stage like Beyonce did what she
Speaker 2: won her first gram Remember when Kanye was like, I'm
Speaker 2: gonna let you finish, but Beyonce, well, he didn't lie. Clearly,
Speaker 2: he didn't lie. He wasn't not here. We all tend yet.
Speaker 2: I think jay Z doing the same shit. Taylor swisherd
Speaker 2: said I'm a finish, but Beyonce, can you come up here?
Speaker 2: Because I feel like this should have been your or
Speaker 2: some shit like that. You should have gotten this a
Speaker 2: million years ago, right that way, though she probably doesn't
Speaker 2: feel that way. It's because you know what, Celene Beyond
Speaker 2: gave her the award and she did not even acknowledge
Speaker 2: Selene beyond. I was upset with that, like, girl, how
Speaker 2: are you gonna be standing right next to the queen
Speaker 2: with that bob boy gone looking like a black girl
Speaker 2: in that bob wig with them diamonds on the diamonds.
Speaker 2: I couldn't even thee the diamonds was blinding me on
Speaker 2: the TV screen. And you're not gonna acknowledge Selene And
Speaker 2: she got health issues. She came out there for you, girl.
Speaker 2: So let's talk about stats when it comes to Beyonce
Speaker 2: and Taylor Swift. So it's this American songwriter. Taylor Swift
Speaker 2: has released ten original studio studio albums. Beyonce has four.
Speaker 2: Excuse me, Beyonce has seven to Taylor Swift's ten. Taylor
Speaker 2: Taylor Swift has four re recorded UH studio albums, five
Speaker 2: extended plays, and four live albums. She's sold and estimated
Speaker 2: one hundred fourteen million album units worldwide, and in terms
Speaker 2: of pure cells TA tally that forty six point six
Speaker 2: million in the United States and seven million in the UK.
Speaker 2: R IAA, which is the Recording Industry Association of America.
Speaker 2: Her albums have garnered fifty one million certified units in
Speaker 2: the United States. As of February twenty twenty four, she
Speaker 2: is the solo artist with the most weeks most most
Speaker 2: weeks sixty nine at number one on US Billboard two hundred.
Speaker 2: So that's just a little, quick, little brief rundown of
Speaker 2: Taylor Swift's whatever. Okay, so I hear it's Beyonce. Well,
Speaker 2: but here's the thing. Taylor Swift her tour alsold Beyonce's
Speaker 2: tour by dump did it? Are you sure googled it
Speaker 2: last night? Yeah? I did. I know. She's just very
Speaker 2: she's sure watchcraft, y'all ain't seeing that shit. I seen
Speaker 2: those damn clips. She was literally in black hoods on stage. Listen,
Speaker 2: she got it. They literally created a thing called post
Speaker 2: concert amnesia because concert goers don't even remember attending the
Speaker 2: Tailorswip concert. They created a syndrome for people after tailerslipt concert.
Speaker 2: They don't even remember going. They don't ever, they don't
Speaker 2: even remember what happened at the concert. They were there,
Speaker 2: but they don't remember what happened. She fucking putting people
Speaker 2: on the hypnosis. I'm convinced it's a real thing. So
Speaker 2: what else happened? Killer Mike got arrested at the Grammys
Speaker 2: after winning three Grammys. I like, he's an elder in
Speaker 2: the hip hop, not an elder, and he won three Grammys.
Speaker 2: Yeah he's you know, he's not twenty two. You can't
Speaker 2: call that man older. But in hip hop. I don't know.
Speaker 2: If you you don't think so I'm oldest Killing Mike,
Speaker 2: he's you'd be like, what, forty five is forty six
Speaker 2: years old? That's not an elder. You're like forty eight,
Speaker 2: I think, so we call it. Okay, you really having
Speaker 2: fun today, bitch. Well, I'm not calling him out elder
Speaker 2: for the Earth. I'm not elder for the earth. I'm
Speaker 2: calling it. Maybe that's not what I was saying. You know,
Speaker 2: people were saying like, oh, you're too old, you're this,
Speaker 2: you're that, and he's proven that that is not the case,
Speaker 2: you know, So that's all I was alluding. I was
Speaker 2: surprised I hadn't listened to any Killing Mike album. I
Speaker 2: didn't realize he even had an album come out, And
Speaker 2: I mean I really hadn't listened to that much new
Speaker 2: music last year for real, unless you know, a little
Speaker 2: singles and shit like that. I haven't really popped in
Speaker 2: anybody's album. So I just was kind of under a
Speaker 2: rock last year with music wise. I didn't realize he
Speaker 2: had an album that even came out. Did you listen
Speaker 2: to what she was listening to? You? I don't even
Speaker 2: know shit, Reverend. I I listened up. I listened because
Speaker 2: of the Scientists and Engineer single that Henry greyd that wards.
Speaker 2: You heard that though, right, Oh, that's the thing. I
Speaker 2: hadn't heard them. I hadn't and maybe I've heard it
Speaker 2: and this just don't remember. I don't know. I got
Speaker 2: to listen to it again, but into world news, y'all,
Speaker 2: Son and Nigga got arrested for what though? Oh we're
Speaker 2: going back to that. Yeah, okay, that's the when he
Speaker 2: got arrested because he had a altercation with one of
Speaker 2: the security guards at the Grammys. And I think it
Speaker 2: was just like a very over zealous security guard that
Speaker 2: just wanted to prove a port that you can't play
Speaker 2: with him. He top flight, so they came and got
Speaker 2: him up out of there over something stupid. It really
Speaker 2: was trying to act like he ain't killing Nigga just
Speaker 2: won three Grammys. You don't know who I am. I
Speaker 2: bet you was a black ride. Oh yeah, probably. You
Speaker 2: know they take their security job X football player. When
Speaker 2: them ex football players become security guards, that'd be disgruntled.
Speaker 2: In light of the Grammys And like I said, I
Speaker 2: was talking about Taylor Swift's disco it's a discoography, pstography Beyonce. Okay, So,
Speaker 2: American singer Beyonce has released seven studio albums, five live albums,
Speaker 2: three compilation albums, five EPs, one soundtrack album, and two
Speaker 2: karaoke albums. I don't know what the fuck a karaoke
Speaker 2: album is, but I want to do them so to date.
Speaker 2: To date, Beyonce has sold over two hundred million records
Speaker 2: worldwide as a solo artist, making her one of the
Speaker 2: best selling music artists of all time. Billboard ringd her
Speaker 2: as a thirty seventh greatest artist of all time. I
Speaker 2: don't know where Taylor Swift rings amongst all the greats
Speaker 2: that we've had, because given her these four Grammys, that
Speaker 2: means she's we not talk about Taylor Swift. We talk
Speaker 2: about in this moment. Let see, she's better than I'm
Speaker 2: just doing a comparison. Still, that means she's better than
Speaker 2: Michael Jackson at this point anyway. So The Recording Industry
Speaker 2: Association Association of America recognized her as the top certified
Speaker 2: certified artist is so Beyonce Okay of the two thousands decade.
Speaker 2: According to our IAA, Beyonce has sold thirty point five
Speaker 2: million albums in the United States, and as of November
Speaker 2: twenty twenty three, the RIAA list her total certified sales
Speaker 2: as a solo artist, including features as over one hundred
Speaker 2: and seventy four million in the United States. So Beyonce
Speaker 2: is gonna be our batty. Beyonce should have got the
Speaker 2: goddamn Grammy. Okay, Beyonce, we salute you. You are baddy
Speaker 2: who toss back for this week? Girl. We love you,
Speaker 2: and I'm gonna put tailor swift ass in a freezer.
Speaker 2: They are not winning the super Bowl this year, okay?
Speaker 2: But ill world news. All right, y'all come close to
Speaker 2: how you're listening to the device, however you listening it is, y'll.
Speaker 2: Drake Dick was leaked. Drake's Dick was lead. Drake. I
Speaker 2: was so upset Dick is leaking. Don't do that. I
Speaker 2: can lie. I much can lie. That was a nice wikipedist, Drake,
Speaker 2: nice Wickoripedia It is nice and long. It wasn't extremely girthy,
Speaker 2: but it wasn't all the way you know, full. It
Speaker 2: was a half tub, so it might you know, expand
Speaker 2: a little. I feel like you put that shit out.
Speaker 2: I just don't see Drake fucking with somebody at this
Speaker 2: point where they would do something like that, like where
Speaker 2: you gotta have a little bit more discernment than to
Speaker 2: be fucking with a bitch and they put your dick
Speaker 2: on the internet like that. Yeah, I hate that for
Speaker 2: him us. I hate that for us because everybody just
Speaker 2: see our mand. My sister gonna message me like, hey,
Speaker 2: you got the Drake video. I was like yes, She's like,
Speaker 2: can you send it to me? I was like absolutely not.
Speaker 2: She was like why. I was like, I'm not sitting
Speaker 2: you my man's dig Like, that's weird for you to
Speaker 2: even ask me for that. She was like, bitch, just
Speaker 2: send it. That's not your man, that's not your man.
Speaker 2: Man like me in one here, like all the dudes
Speaker 2: like on Twitter on excuse me, it's talking about Drake
Speaker 2: got all the holes, money and an XX Glizzie. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it's just too much winning for him. It's disgusting. Man. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I like cockshots though, Like, I want to know who
Speaker 2: the fuck got that cock shot? Who you said that?
Speaker 2: That did look all manicure right, that dig look like
Speaker 2: it had just been through like a manicure session, like
Speaker 2: it was all nicely. He was tapping that hairy eyeshole too,
Speaker 2: with the blanket right there, Like, did y'all see our
Speaker 2: producer tailor? She pulls her little picture and at Drake
Speaker 2: on Instagram or her Instagram story. Yeah, I was really
Speaker 2: get at her for that this way, but I was
Speaker 2: just like, you know what, I'm gonna let her hand dad.
Speaker 2: She got into her little picture and she hat but
Speaker 2: I was like, no, cause you got Tyler Lepli or
Speaker 2: whatever his name is. You already got pictures with that nigga,
Speaker 2: and now here you come popping out with my you
Speaker 2: know that's my nigger you posted. Look, Drake had his
Speaker 2: arm round tailor neck. I now I felt. I'm like, wait,
Speaker 2: why you got his hand right your neck like that?
Speaker 2: Like he was like, yeah, he was showing her a
Speaker 2: little bit. I cut the turrn one a little bit.
Speaker 2: I don't know, but I'm like, why why Drake got
Speaker 2: his hair on your neck like that tailor top? But
Speaker 2: he know what's up. You better get tailor girl. She
Speaker 2: better take your man. I would hate the choke slam
Speaker 2: Taylor ass somewhere would hate to do that to her.
Speaker 2: That's not your nigga. Okay, my man, y'all, If you
Speaker 2: ever happened between me and Drake, just know that I
Speaker 2: manifested it here with you listeners. Believe it in it
Speaker 2: right here on this show man from day one, from
Speaker 2: episode one, Yeah, really want Drake. What I do that
Speaker 2: is not even your type. He's not my type. But
Speaker 2: I'm a huge fan and I love him so much.
Speaker 2: So y'all, we was at Drake concert. This bitch ain't
Speaker 2: no naw Drake song. That's a lie. I do all
Speaker 2: the songs. All the real fans were singing the hell
Speaker 2: out that nigga song We like No that was twenty one.
Speaker 2: Savage said, I didn't know that's what it was. You
Speaker 2: was ready hanging on my love life right now, and
Speaker 2: I just don't appreciate it between you and Taylor today.
Speaker 2: It's just die Taylor. One step, I'm closer than you, bitch.
Speaker 2: You better get she is. But that's okay because I'm
Speaker 2: going to see Drake again. And two where he gonna
Speaker 2: be at hand he back on tour with Ja Cole. Interesting,
Speaker 2: he gonna be in Ohio. They had Drake, you know
Speaker 2: through your bronze age, tam Bam coming, I ain't gonna
Speaker 2: have one one. So tam Bam coming to see your baby?
Speaker 2: All right, what are we do we have anything else
Speaker 2: for stupid? I think that's that man. That's a whole
Speaker 2: like a lot of gang shit going on, uh this week,
Speaker 2: but Drake just ruined the internet for the day. I
Speaker 2: think I haven't really been back on and see what
Speaker 2: the fuck people talk about about that dick. But yeah,
Speaker 2: m my mom would call me this morning and she
Speaker 2: was listening to the episode with the Jody you know,
Speaker 2: teaching us how to you know, suck dick. And my
Speaker 2: mom was like, you know what, what was she teaching
Speaker 2: us to suck dick? Well, she she didn't teach us,
Speaker 2: but she said she could like she has closely choreography
Speaker 2: class for a second dick. Okay, yeah yeah, And my
Speaker 2: mom said, good morning, baby, Can I just say something?
Speaker 2: I said, yes, ma'am. She was like, every time I
Speaker 2: think we can't get to a new level of what
Speaker 2: the fuck you and AJ take it y'all will take
Speaker 2: it to a new level of what the It's not
Speaker 2: really us taking it to a new level. It's the
Speaker 2: guess that's what I said. She said, well, you brought
Speaker 2: them on there, didn't you. I was like, yes, I did.
Speaker 2: We all just be be doing like shit for research purposes. Okay,
Speaker 2: it's just a little high. We have hypotheses ed education, edumacation.
Speaker 2: That's all speaking of education, all right. So I was
Speaker 2: really like, in my feelings, this is the ninth year
Speaker 2: in a row that I have not had a Valentine,
Speaker 2: And I was like, just you know, I'm still hopeful,
Speaker 2: and I still like what love, and I'm still like,
Speaker 2: I hope it's romantic regardless. If you want to see
Speaker 2: something good, watch The Valve. If you want to be
Speaker 2: all in the field. That's a good movie on Netflix
Speaker 2: right now, the vowel. But I was scrolling and I
Speaker 2: was seeing like this post. I can't remember whose page
Speaker 2: it was on, but it was like tag the happiest wife,
Speaker 2: you know. So I went in there and I started
Speaker 2: reading a women who were tagged, but the ones that
Speaker 2: I who I was most impressed with were the wives
Speaker 2: who tagged themselves. So I messaged those wives and I
Speaker 2: asked them to come on this show and talk about
Speaker 2: why you're the happiest wife, because I want us to
Speaker 2: be hopeful, I want us to find love, and I
Speaker 2: want us to grow. So we'll be right back with
Speaker 2: our first guest. Who's gonna talk about why she's the
Speaker 2: happiest wife. EM Okay, guys, we're back. And y'all know
Speaker 2: I'm a hopeless romantic. So I was scrolling and I
Speaker 2: just saw this beautiful post about the happiest wife. So
Speaker 2: I got to dig it through the comments to seeing
Speaker 2: who they were shouting out to be the happiest wife.
Speaker 2: And then I was more impressed with the women who
Speaker 2: were saying that they were the happiest wife themselves, because
Speaker 2: you know, outside I can thank you the happiest wife.
Speaker 2: You may not be, but these women were saying, no, baby,
Speaker 2: look at me, because I am the happiest wife. And
Speaker 2: I came across this one profile for our guest, Jennifer Allen.
Speaker 1: Thank you for joining us, thanks for having me.
Speaker 2: And she is the CEO of Justin Loaf LLC in Dallas, Texas,
Speaker 2: where she creates traades micro weddings all over Dallas.
Speaker 1: Thank you for joining us, girl, thanks for having me.
Speaker 2: Tell us what makes you that? Like? What made you
Speaker 2: decide to say tight? Right there? I am the happiest wife.
Speaker 2: Don't play with me.
Speaker 1: Don't play with it, because, let me tell you something.
Speaker 1: My husband is. He is top tier.
Speaker 2: He has been intentional about being a husband, not just
Speaker 2: wanting a wife since I met him, and we have
Speaker 2: been married for thirteen years and we have three sons, eleven,
Speaker 2: nine and two, and every day that we've been together,
Speaker 2: I've never had to question whether or not I am
Speaker 2: enough for him, whether he loves me, whether I am.
Speaker 1: Secure within our relationship.
Speaker 2: And that's not to say that we don't have issues
Speaker 2: or petty arguments or that sort of thing, but it's
Speaker 2: this security that comes with no matter what.
Speaker 1: He can be upset with me.
Speaker 2: If he leaves out the house, he gonna bring me
Speaker 2: something back. If he goes to go do something, he
Speaker 2: gonna I'll be back. I'm about to go do whatever.
Speaker 2: It's no storm out of the house. It's all this
Speaker 2: security of no matter what, you are the most important
Speaker 2: thing to me. Even though you're getting on my last
Speaker 2: nerve at this moment, and I'm sure our work is nerve,
Speaker 2: but I don't care how long did y'all date before
Speaker 2: you got married? So we met in January two thousand
Speaker 2: and nine, and we got married in July two thousand,
Speaker 2: so you knew that quickly, yes, So on our So
Speaker 2: I met my husband on my Space, so let's start there.
Speaker 2: So I and what so random is I had not
Speaker 2: been on my Space in years, right, like so long?
Speaker 2: Facebook was popping then had been and so long. And
Speaker 2: my best friend was likeirl, I walked into my MySpace
Speaker 2: page the other day and I'm like, let me get
Speaker 2: on here and see. And I don't know how whether
Speaker 2: he has sent me a message. So much time has
Speaker 2: passed since since then, but I don't know how we
Speaker 2: end up connecting. We exchange, we end up exchanging phone
Speaker 2: numbers like that same day, talked on the phone all day.
Speaker 1: On a it was a Saturday.
Speaker 2: We talked on the phone all day long, and then
Speaker 2: he was like, man, I wish I could see, but
Speaker 2: I got to go to work tomorrow. He's nineteen years old, right,
Speaker 2: so kids, And so I'm like, oh, don't don't stop
Speaker 2: your bag behind me, like go, you know, go take
Speaker 2: care of your business. So the next day he calls
Speaker 2: me and He's like, what you're doing today? And I'm like, nothing,
Speaker 2: what you doing? I thought you had to go to work.
Speaker 2: He's like I'm sick. I'm like, oh hell la la.
Speaker 2: I'm like, yo, you've got his full work. If you
Speaker 2: feel to take off of your job from some cheek
Speaker 2: you demit on the internet, you FeelA not go to
Speaker 2: work behind somebody you don't even know.
Speaker 1: And we end up going to the to Rezus and
Speaker 1: going to.
Speaker 2: The movies and he went with me to Walmart so
Speaker 2: I can get my little groceries for the week and
Speaker 2: we had a really good, like just a really good time.
Speaker 2: So that was a Sunday. That Wednesday, he came over
Speaker 2: my house and he was like, we are gonna get married.
Speaker 2: And I'm like, boy, you are just trying to get
Speaker 2: you some and you don't have to say all that
Speaker 2: because I'm finna give it to you, so you don't
Speaker 2: gotta gas me up.
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, Like.
Speaker 2: I don't, I don't need this has happening because I
Speaker 2: wanted to happen. This has nothing to do with you
Speaker 2: telling me that we're gonna get married. And he was like, no, like,
Speaker 2: we're we're gonna get married. I'm like, all right, whatever.
Speaker 2: So literally we became inseparable from that moment on and
Speaker 2: I had just got out of relationship a couple months prior,
Speaker 2: and I was really on some like I'm setting boundaries
Speaker 2: with people and whoever don't get it, don't get it.
Speaker 2: So he would come stay the night at my house
Speaker 2: and I told him, I said, hey, if you stay
Speaker 2: here seven times throughout the month, you're gonna have to
Speaker 2: pay my light bill because you over here using electricity
Speaker 2: to microwaves, like you just because he lived with his
Speaker 2: mom and so he was in the military waiting orders
Speaker 2: and so I'm like, you, my light bill was like
Speaker 2: sixty dollars. They weren't even like it was like crazy,
Speaker 2: And so he was there.
Speaker 1: At the end of the month, came.
Speaker 2: I'm like, I need my sixty three fifty more, like
Speaker 2: where where's where's my money at? And he and he
Speaker 2: paid it, and like I didn't have cable, and he
Speaker 2: would come over there and he was like, you don't
Speaker 2: have cable. You just watching DVD's. Rest or red Box
Speaker 2: was BD. He's like, you just watching DVD's.
Speaker 1: All the time.
Speaker 2: I'm like, I have to choose between being able to
Speaker 2: consistently keep my nails done or having cable, and I'm
Speaker 2: choosing my nails, And so I said, if you want
Speaker 2: me to have cable, then you get the cable.
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't need no cable. And so he
Speaker 1: got the cable.
Speaker 2: And so when I would leave to go to work,
Speaker 2: I would make him reap get up too, like you
Speaker 2: got you gotta go to work, So you head back
Speaker 2: to where you're going, because you're just not finna be
Speaker 2: land up in my house. And so it started to
Speaker 2: go to where I would we would leave at the
Speaker 2: same time. Then it would be when he would leave,
Speaker 2: he would bring my key to my job. And then
Speaker 2: that turned into him saying, well, can I just have
Speaker 2: a key? And so I was like, well, you know
Speaker 2: you've never had an apartment before, so let me explain
Speaker 2: to you how it works. When you go into the
Speaker 2: lease in office and you sign on the paper and
Speaker 2: say you're gonna pay the full month's rent, they give
Speaker 2: you a key. I said, so I don't need a roommate,
Speaker 2: So if you want a key, then you need to pay.
Speaker 1: You need to pay the rent.
Speaker 2: And so I said, but you don't make enough money
Speaker 2: to pay the rent, and be my boyfriend.
Speaker 1: Like to take me somewhere. So I'm so I am,
Speaker 1: I'm I'm three years older than than than my husband.
Speaker 2: And so, like I said, I had just dated somebody
Speaker 2: who was trash on top of trash, and I just
Speaker 2: knew what I did not want to continue to deal with.
Speaker 2: And so he was like okay. So like the next month,
Speaker 2: he had got a new job, and he came in
Speaker 2: there and slapped the money order on the table and
Speaker 2: was like, hey, give me my key. I'm like, boy,
Speaker 2: you can have my key. Used to get in the door.
Speaker 1: I'm knocked on the door to get it there. I
Speaker 1: don't care. I see if I could come over because
Speaker 1: I don't care.
Speaker 2: You got it? So we we we we kept dating,
Speaker 2: he moved in. We were getting serious, and then in
Speaker 2: October of that year, so we met in January. So
Speaker 2: by the time October came, we were we were I mean,
Speaker 2: it was it was serious. It was you know, we
Speaker 2: were locked in. And I told him, I said, well,
Speaker 2: my my lease is up and I'm gonna move to
Speaker 2: another apartment inside of my complex. And I said, you
Speaker 2: cannot come with me, And he was like, what do
Speaker 2: you mean. I said, you've never experienced living by yourself before.
Speaker 2: And I know that you do a great job of
Speaker 2: taking care of things in the house with me together,
Speaker 2: but I need to know that you could take care
Speaker 2: of yourself by yourself, I said, because if you're gonna
Speaker 2: be my husband, you're gonna be these things. I don't
Speaker 2: want you to feel like you missed out on living alone.
Speaker 2: I don't want you to feel like, you know, I
Speaker 2: need to see that you can remember to pay your bills,
Speaker 2: because they your bills to pay, nine need bringing them up,
Speaker 2: you know, and that sort of thing. How old were
Speaker 2: you on it too, cause that's a very much. So
Speaker 2: I was twenty three. So when we met, he was nineteen.
Speaker 2: I was twenty two, and then he turned twenty in March,
Speaker 2: and then I turned twenty three in June, and so
Speaker 2: I was like, you know, I just I just don't.
Speaker 1: I just need to know a baby.
Speaker 2: That man told me, if you move out this apartment
Speaker 2: and I don't go with you, we are done.
Speaker 1: And I said, well, I guess we're done.
Speaker 2: And I told my mama and she was like, Jennifer, okay,
Speaker 2: And I said what, She's like nothing, And so we
Speaker 2: just kind of left it alone. He ended up getting
Speaker 2: his own apartment. I moved into my apartment and he
Speaker 2: stopped talking to me. We broke up, we were done.
Speaker 2: His mama tried to hook him up with the lady
Speaker 2: with the girl across the street and went to Ikea. Yeah,
Speaker 2: there was Ikea and everything. I said, oh, I know,
Speaker 2: you ain't out here picking our feelings with a bitch
Speaker 2: like they what's the ike up?
Speaker 1: My feelings is crushed.
Speaker 2: I faill, what.
Speaker 1: Are you serious right now?
Speaker 2: And I was talking to my mom about it, and
Speaker 2: she said, you know, I really need for you to
Speaker 2: understand that Tavares is a good man. Because he's a
Speaker 2: good man. It has nothing to do with you. So
Speaker 2: he's going to be a good man to whoever he's with,
Speaker 2: not just you. So if you want to keep this
Speaker 2: going and be on your high horse, and I'm putting
Speaker 2: my foot down, I'm setting boundaries, She's like, you are
Speaker 2: going to miss out. And she's like, so you do
Speaker 2: with that what you want to do with the I'm
Speaker 2: not telling you who you're supposed to be with, but
Speaker 2: you do what you want to.
Speaker 1: Do with it.
Speaker 2: And I ended up needing to go get my tooth pulled,
Speaker 2: and I'm like, I mean, I'm like, can you please
Speaker 2: take me to the dnist? I can't drive myself back
Speaker 2: back home. And he was like, yeah, that's fine. So
Speaker 2: he took me to the dentist and when it was over,
Speaker 2: it was like a traumatic experience. And then he was like, well,
Speaker 2: you just come back to my apartment. And I ended
Speaker 2: up being in his house for like three weeks and.
Speaker 1: We were back together.
Speaker 2: And that was in April of twenty twenty April of
Speaker 2: two thousand and ten, and then in he found out
Speaker 2: that he was going to be leaving for deployment, and
Speaker 2: so we kind of had this conversation like, hey, I know,
Speaker 2: we just got back together, Like this doesn't have to
Speaker 2: be a thing, Like we can you know, call this
Speaker 2: all and he was like no, like this is this
Speaker 2: is where I want to be.
Speaker 1: I'm like good because me too, because.
Speaker 2: I'm at I don't want to I don't want.
Speaker 1: To do that. Yeah, exactly, I don't want to go nowhere.
Speaker 2: And we decided before he left for deployment and he
Speaker 2: he went he went to San Diego for trainings and
Speaker 2: Navy went to San Diego for a training. He came
Speaker 2: back in July and he proposed and he proposed on
Speaker 2: a Thursday, and we got married that next Tuesday, and
Speaker 2: so we went to city Hall and got married and
Speaker 2: we've been married for thirteen years. And I it has
Speaker 2: been when you get married young, it's difficult because you
Speaker 2: are growing up in front of somebody else and all
Speaker 2: of your eyes, all of your flaws are on display,
Speaker 2: and all of your wants and needs and desires, they're
Speaker 2: constantly changing and shifting, and you're doing this with somebody else.
Speaker 2: And then you become parents, and so now you're not
Speaker 2: only trying to figure out, you know, how to be
Speaker 2: a husband and a wife, but now a mother and
Speaker 2: a father. But I'm still trying to figure out how
Speaker 2: to be Jennifer. I'm still trying to figure out, you know,
Speaker 2: what I'm doing with myself. And it has been the
Speaker 2: best journey now when I look back on it, because
Speaker 2: all the things that are good about my accomplishments, people say, oh,
Speaker 2: you're so awesome. Oh you've been on Netflix, Love is bla,
Speaker 2: Oh you married to Brad and Judy all you did this,
Speaker 2: Oh you did that, And I'm like, I would not
Speaker 2: have been able to do any of these things had
Speaker 2: I not had my husband. Number One, hyping me up
Speaker 2: so tough to say you deserve all of that, go
Speaker 2: do it, you should do it, and him being here
Speaker 2: to be a great dad to his kids, because kids,
Speaker 2: well I'm set you right, I'm out here frolicing around town. Oh, Jennifer,
Speaker 2: we thought he was in Chicago to speak an event.
Speaker 1: Yeah. And I got three children, you know, And so
Speaker 1: my husband is an amazing dad. You know.
Speaker 2: I often tell him that he's truly the dad that
Speaker 2: I wish that I had grown up and to see
Speaker 2: him with our sons, it gives it almost makes me
Speaker 2: jealous sometimes because it's like me and I wish I
Speaker 2: had that, Like I wish I could have experienced what
Speaker 2: it was like to have a dad who was so
Speaker 2: intentional and so involved in everything that I that I did.
Speaker 1: My dad really didn't come around until I became me. Now.
Speaker 1: You know, when it's cute to say.
Speaker 2: Oh, look with my daughter, like what's and my daughter,
Speaker 2: you know, look what she's doing right right? And so
Speaker 2: it's like, yes, in spite of you know, so my
Speaker 2: husband is just I would shout from the rooftops to
Speaker 2: anybody you know that I'm the happiest wife, not because
Speaker 2: we have this fairy tale love. But it is the
Speaker 2: securest thing I've ever experienced in my life. To have
Speaker 2: somebody who you don't have to question whether or not
Speaker 2: your best intentions are their main intentions, and to know
Speaker 2: that it's not going to get out, like if it
Speaker 2: comes down out, they come down to it, he raised
Speaker 2: throw them hands behind his woman. And so the fact,
Speaker 2: the fact that I know that also gives me the
Speaker 2: security to know that you know, it is what it is.
Speaker 2: And I just look forward to what we can keep
Speaker 2: building and having. And sometimes I just be like, oh
Speaker 2: my god, i live in a house full of dudes.
Speaker 2: I'm the only girls because we have three three three boys,
Speaker 2: and I live in a house full of clingy, touchy
Speaker 2: Every five seconds, somebody gotta be in my space. And
Speaker 2: then you look around and everybody in the house has
Speaker 2: been inside your body. Everybody listen in or out, you know.
Speaker 2: And so I'm like, Jesus, give me a break, give
Speaker 2: me a break. And you know, my mom, I'll say
Speaker 2: little things to her like, oh girl, this is she
Speaker 2: like Jennifer, it is worse problems to have.
Speaker 1: Let let me tell you if your biggest complaint with Tavares.
Speaker 2: Right now is that every time he go to the store,
Speaker 2: he got to call you twenty times to say the
Speaker 2: same thing that if that's your only problem you women,
Speaker 2: then take it the me online. It's always a thing
Speaker 2: about women being submissive and blah blah blah blah blah. Yeah,
Speaker 2: how do you and your spouse like navigate decision making
Speaker 2: and your relationship?
Speaker 1: So each one of us is good at different things.
Speaker 2: And we have always allowed whoever has the strength to
Speaker 2: make to make the decision. So my husband is really
Speaker 2: good with keeping up keeping up with things like making
Speaker 2: everybody's doctor's appointments and Dennis appointments and figuring out where
Speaker 2: we should go and do in certain certain things. But
Speaker 2: his strong suit is not remembering when somebody has a
Speaker 2: project due at school, or when the parent teacher conference
Speaker 2: is when the follow up, or the kids we're volunteering
Speaker 2: for the Valentine party, well they need back.
Speaker 1: That's that's not as strong point. So what whatever you're
Speaker 1: good at, that's what you take the point on, because
Speaker 1: we look at it like these kids don't care who
Speaker 1: do what. The light company don't care who who pay it,
Speaker 1: as long as it's as long as it's paid. Money
Speaker 1: has been one of those things in our relationship.
Speaker 2: That's never been an issue because when we didn't have it,
Speaker 2: we figured it out, and now that we do have
Speaker 2: it is the same. It's we need, we pay what
Speaker 2: needs to be paid, and we keep it pushing from there.
Speaker 2: I think the whole debate on you know, I'm not
Speaker 2: going fifty to fifty with no men own no bills.
Speaker 2: We have a joint account, so all the money going
Speaker 2: into the account and we and I'm paying the bills,
Speaker 2: he's paying the bills.
Speaker 1: I mean it, I don't.
Speaker 2: You ain't got no little account on the side. You know,
Speaker 2: I have a big account on the right girl, and
Speaker 2: and and he knows that. And so you know, I
Speaker 2: work a full time job and I run my business
Speaker 2: full time, and so my husband is a data analyst,
Speaker 2: so he he makes more than I than I do.
Speaker 2: So the way that we the way that we do
Speaker 2: our funds is that all the money goes into one
Speaker 2: account from our job. So all the money goes into
Speaker 2: one account, We pay all all of the bills, whatever
Speaker 2: is left over half goes into savings, and then we
Speaker 2: split the other half for you to be able to
Speaker 2: do whatever it is that you want to do. It
Speaker 2: I manage my business money on my own. And it's
Speaker 2: not that it's it's mine.
Speaker 1: It's just that my husband knows. If he sees it,
Speaker 1: he gonna be like, well, we could do or what
Speaker 1: if we did?
Speaker 2: And I'm and so we once we recognized that that
Speaker 2: was the thing, he's like, I don't even want to
Speaker 2: have access to it because then when something happens and
Speaker 2: he's like, man, we we got to spend four thousand
Speaker 2: dollars on XYZ, I'm like, all right, bet it. I
Speaker 2: got it because I'm the saver. And since we know
Speaker 2: that's our strong strong point, is what then I handle
Speaker 2: the money. If I wasn't the saver and I and
Speaker 2: he was, then he would handle it and I wouldn't
Speaker 2: look at it like he's giving me an allowance. No,
Speaker 2: we have to keep living beyond our immediate needs. And
Speaker 2: so because we recognize that it's whoever has, whoever strong
Speaker 2: gets at whatever it is, that's who does what.
Speaker 1: I hate washing clothes. I don't want to touch nobody's dirty.
Speaker 2: Ass, drawing I can imagine, I don't want to turn
Speaker 2: your fock and they take their socks off and everything
Speaker 2: is inside out, like I don't. And my husband I
Speaker 2: have to, like, don't wash the clothes inside out like
Speaker 2: he will just put it in there. But at this
Speaker 2: point I'm like, whatever, I don't like washing clothes and
Speaker 2: he doesn't like folding clothes. So instead of it being
Speaker 2: this power struggle of who needs to do what, he
Speaker 2: washes the clothes, I fold the clothes up. Everybody put
Speaker 2: their stuff up. Instead of it being this, well, you
Speaker 2: the woman, you need to do.
Speaker 1: We don't have gender roles.
Speaker 2: Of course, you know, it's certain things that people gravitate towards.
Speaker 2: He makes sure the car has gas, like stuff dealing,
Speaker 2: that's not my strong point. He makes sure the lawn
Speaker 2: the law and man come. But listen, listen, he be
Speaker 2: ready to he is social living. I'm like, boy, you
Speaker 2: I ain't never seen you've fiping by your life. But
Speaker 2: the fact that you be so ready, I believe it.
Speaker 1: I believe it.
Speaker 2: I believe it with my whole heart. I believe it.
Speaker 2: I bet you would. I bet and and and that's
Speaker 2: all I need because I ain't never gonna let you
Speaker 2: fight nobody. But I just I just didn't know that
Speaker 2: you will when the time comes. With the time, got
Speaker 2: that dog getting you to go ahead and come out
Speaker 2: through I can appreciate that. Girl. Listen, I had a
Speaker 2: million questions, but you answer all of them, answer every
Speaker 2: last one of them. And I was about to ask
Speaker 2: because then another thing, like how do you guys handle disagreements?
Speaker 2: Just different things that come up in a marriage that
Speaker 2: people who haven't been married, they think they're gonna do
Speaker 2: something one way. You know, I can get some advice
Speaker 2: from you because you've been married for thirteen years now.
Speaker 2: So how do you guys handle Yeah, disagreements in a marriage.
Speaker 2: So my husband is a he wants to talk about
Speaker 2: it right now type of person, and I am not.
Speaker 2: I need a I need a minute. And so we
Speaker 2: had to learn that it's okay that I need a minute,
Speaker 2: but I have to also be respectful of the fact
Speaker 2: that I can't let that drag out for the day.
Speaker 2: And so it's like we set these boundaries up. You
Speaker 2: get an hour to cool down because he it's burning
Speaker 2: him up to not be able to talk about it
Speaker 2: right right then and there, and I'm I'm more coming
Speaker 2: down there he going up yeah, right, And so for
Speaker 2: it's a lot of things that may happen that he'll
Speaker 2: he'll he'll say, you are too nonchalant about things, and
Speaker 2: it's not And I have to remind him it's not
Speaker 2: that I'm nonchalant about It's not that I don't care.
Speaker 1: It's just that I.
Speaker 2: Know that in twenty minutes, none of this is about
Speaker 2: to be relevant. So because I know it's not gonna
Speaker 2: be relevant, I'm not gonna let myself get that worked
Speaker 2: up because why and the stuff that we're going back
Speaker 2: and forth about isn't like, oh, who is this woman
Speaker 2: or who is this and that. It's like white didn't
Speaker 2: put a trash bag inside the trash can, or I
Speaker 2: thought you said that you was gonna take this out.
Speaker 1: You know, just little things.
Speaker 2: But our biggest thing has always been to keep it respectful.
Speaker 1: There is no name calling and you this and.
Speaker 2: That and degrading and being the being the meaning to
Speaker 2: the other person to get your point across. And we
Speaker 2: often have this like little thing like if you got
Speaker 2: mad at your boss, you wouldn't go to them and
Speaker 2: cuss them out and talk to them all kind of
Speaker 2: crazy or you're a coworker, because you would fear that
Speaker 2: you would lose your livelihood. But people will talk to
Speaker 2: their spouses like trash And it's like how can you
Speaker 2: give a stranger more respect.
Speaker 1: Than you give your significant other? And we adopted that
Speaker 1: model a long time ago, like talk to me and
Speaker 1: talk to me like your coworker, talk to me nice,
Speaker 1: or don't talk to me at all.
Speaker 2: And sometimes like if it's like a heated thing, especially
Speaker 2: because because.
Speaker 1: We have kids, we'll text like.
Speaker 2: Because you thought you was about uh or so because
Speaker 2: we don't ever want to create this environment for them.
Speaker 2: You know, where they living with their parents, going back
Speaker 2: and forth, and that's the sort of thing. I never
Speaker 2: want to give my children a childhood that they have
Speaker 2: to recover from, like be fun loving black boys who
Speaker 2: just your kids are either gonna want a marriage just
Speaker 2: like yours or nothing like yours, right, those those are
Speaker 2: the only two options they're gonna be. Like, I ain't
Speaker 2: never seen my mama and daddy fight. Meanwhile, y'all texting
Speaker 2: like yeah, nigga, baby, your bowing mama, Like I'm on,
Speaker 2: I'm on y'all relationships sometimes you know what I'm saying
Speaker 2: because verbally, you fuck are to say something real nasty,
Speaker 2: be a partner. Yes, yes, it's a little bit different
Speaker 2: than that. You don't mean it, yeah, And you don't
Speaker 2: mean it because because my text, because your text are
Speaker 2: auto correct, you're trying to cuss and it's like duck.
Speaker 2: It's like I wasn't trying to say duck. Like I
Speaker 2: don't even what I was trying to say. But it
Speaker 2: definitely helps to going back to the security piece of things,
Speaker 2: I don't let too much get to me because I'm like, dude,
Speaker 2: you I know this is not gonna be a big deal.
Speaker 2: And because i know it's not gonna be a big deal,
Speaker 2: I'm not even gonna get ready to get all that
Speaker 2: work worked up. Our biggest argument always across the board
Speaker 2: is and I wouldn't even call it an argument, but
Speaker 2: the biggest thing to go back and forth is my
Speaker 2: husband thinks that we're supposed to have sex like forty
Speaker 2: five thousand times a day.
Speaker 1: And he thinks that other people.
Speaker 2: He's like, I'm sure we're the only married people that's
Speaker 2: having sex like four times a week. That's not I'm like,
Speaker 2: I'm like, I'm like, do you know what, No, I'm like, bro,
Speaker 2: we have like we literally, like clockwork, are gonna have
Speaker 2: sex at least every other day, like at least every
Speaker 2: other day.
Speaker 1: That is going to be a thing.
Speaker 2: And he'll say stuff like people people, I'm I'm I'm
Speaker 2: sure folks out here married they doing you need to
Speaker 2: I'm like, no, that is four times a week was
Speaker 2: a health for time? People even married for thirteen years
Speaker 2: or three kids, that is a lot of sex. Yeah,
Speaker 2: three kids two uh three kids, A business of this
Speaker 2: or that, all of these things, a dog, all this stuff.
Speaker 2: I'm I'm on the pta board, I'm on you know,
Speaker 2: I'm room mom, all these things. I'm like, it is,
Speaker 2: this is healthy and I and it's not that we
Speaker 2: argue about it, but it's like, if it's anything that's
Speaker 2: gonna call some type of friction, if it is bring
Speaker 2: him looking at me and I'm looking like.
Speaker 1: I bend over the time I shoe up.
Speaker 2: And he's like, oh, you're trying to be You're trying
Speaker 2: to be freaky. I'm trying not to fall. I'm trying
Speaker 2: not to trip, like I'm putting anna fall on this
Speaker 2: dick you basically basically you know. And and he's like,
Speaker 2: I'm like, I'm putting all loads like trying to get
Speaker 2: alled up for me.
Speaker 1: I'm trying to preserve my skin.
Speaker 2: Like I don't I'm trying to moisturize myself, but okay,
Speaker 2: and we both work from home, so it just feels
Speaker 2: like it just needs to.
Speaker 1: Be this free for all all the time.
Speaker 2: So that is probably what we But something that I
Speaker 2: do to I will I make it a point to
Speaker 2: like randomly, or it could just be a random Tuesday
Speaker 2: ten o'clock, I'm like, boom, I'm going in here.
Speaker 1: I'm finnam, I'm in here.
Speaker 2: Before I even go in there, I'm Sirritchela going in
Speaker 2: and show out real quick. On the tuesdays, it's going
Speaker 2: up on Tuesday for real. I'm like, come on, and
Speaker 2: that how catch you off? Bar?
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. And you you are here
Speaker 1: thinking you missed a big shot for the rest of
Speaker 1: the day.
Speaker 2: But in my mind, I'm thinking, why go the rest
Speaker 2: of the night to do whatever? To do without without
Speaker 2: without you sitting on the couch, like what to do
Speaker 2: when you jumped out? You funny as hell?
Speaker 1: Time you going to bed.
Speaker 2: That's a good problem to have.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a good problem to have, So I'll take it.
Speaker 1: I'll take it.
Speaker 2: Do you have any advice for women who are in
Speaker 2: marriages and they don't seem very happy or any advice
Speaker 2: for women who are looking for love or any advice.
Speaker 1: What do you have If you are in.
Speaker 2: A marriage and you are unhappy, First of all, figure
Speaker 2: out why you're unhappy.
Speaker 1: Are you are Are you.
Speaker 2: Unhappy because you are comparing your life to somebody else's.
Speaker 2: Are you unhappy because you want this social media love
Speaker 2: and you're not getting that. I see that with a
Speaker 2: lot of people. Your husband may not be the Instagram husband,
Speaker 2: and that's okay. It doesn't mean he loves you any less,
Speaker 2: and so it's comparison is the thief of joy, and
Speaker 2: I think that that really hurts people. My husband is
Speaker 2: not going If you go to his Instagram, it's probably
Speaker 2: like thirty pitches.
Speaker 1: I'm sure seventeen of them is of me. The other
Speaker 1: ones are the kids. He it ain't nothing on their
Speaker 1: He's not a I'm a post you type of dude.
Speaker 2: And I'm okay with that because in real life, like you,
Speaker 2: you double tapping me in real life, so you know.
Speaker 1: It's okay.
Speaker 2: But I think that a lot of times, in this
Speaker 2: day and age with social media, I'm finding that people
Speaker 2: are unhappy in their relationships because it's not living up
Speaker 2: to this sixty second real that's being put up with
Speaker 2: your husband showing up with flowers and doing this, and
Speaker 2: doing and doing that. But the things that he is
Speaker 2: doing for you, you know, could be.
Speaker 1: Taking the place of all of that.
Speaker 2: It's just not aesthetically pleasing And so I think that
Speaker 2: focusing on the good and your own relationship is great. Now,
Speaker 2: if you whip be your ass, you needs a niggadvarce.
Speaker 1: Now I ain't ain't.
Speaker 2: Yeah, if he out here knocking you upside your head
Speaker 2: and sleeping with everybody under the sun and doing our
Speaker 2: go ahead and move and move on.
Speaker 1: So it's like, go ahead, but if But to.
Speaker 2: People that are dating, that are wanting to be in
Speaker 2: a relationship and want to be with somebody, my biggest
Speaker 2: piece of advice is that it's that you have of
Speaker 2: He needs to be this tall, make this much money,
Speaker 2: have all these all these things that at any point
Speaker 2: could change. Right, so he has to be this tall.
Speaker 2: What if what if he was that tall and he
Speaker 2: got in a car accident and now he in a wheelchair.
Speaker 2: Now now he's not that tall. What if he had
Speaker 2: this amazing job and then he lost it. Those are
Speaker 2: not character traits.
Speaker 1: Those are not.
Speaker 2: Things that will sustain you in a marriage and I
Speaker 2: think that having people often say like I want a
Speaker 2: good man, I want a good woman.
Speaker 1: Well, what is that actually mean for you?
Speaker 2: Right? What that means for you? And what and what
Speaker 2: that means for me? It's too totally do different things.
Speaker 2: So I think being able to write down like character
Speaker 2: and look at what you write. If you say I
Speaker 2: want a good I want a good man, and then
Speaker 2: you immediately go into he gotta make six feet gears,
Speaker 2: be six foot.
Speaker 1: Five, light skinned, drive this, and that those.
Speaker 2: Are gotta gotta have a dick like Drake drink right, girl?
Speaker 2: I said, ah, I said what I said, girl, did
Speaker 2: you see Drake dick? My husband was like, so, y'all
Speaker 2: just really on.
Speaker 1: And is and I was, and I was I said,
Speaker 1: oh my god, this is a video.
Speaker 2: This was a picture act just in case they take
Speaker 2: it down. That Drake got oh god, you did like
Speaker 2: and yeah, you know.
Speaker 1: And that is something that I do love about my marriage,
Speaker 1: is like he.
Speaker 2: Wasn't insecure by that, insecure or offended that. I mean,
Speaker 2: it's something that's falling around on on social media. If
Speaker 2: somebody said I seen Beyonce sitty, I'm a look, I
Speaker 2: was just like, I'll it's curiosity, you know, and so
Speaker 2: I just yeah, Drake's Drake's Dick definitely has been.
Speaker 1: The donkey of the day for real, like.
Speaker 2: Literally literally literally donkey other day. Yeah, well, let me
Speaker 2: tell you something, missus, Jennifer Allen. This was such a
Speaker 2: great interview. You were a great guest. I want you
Speaker 2: to plug all your things, plug your micro wedding venue
Speaker 2: and all the time. Please. Yeah.
Speaker 1: So, I'm the owner of Jesse Lope.
Speaker 2: I'm a micro wedding plannet expert based here in the Dallas,
Speaker 2: Texas area. I'm on social media at Jesse Lope LLC.
Speaker 2: I have a podcast called the Wedding to Wife Podcast
Speaker 2: where we talk about all things from wedding planning to
Speaker 2: wife life because it is more than just getting that rain,
Speaker 2: and we also want to educate brides on what it
Speaker 2: takes to actually pull off these pinterest worthy weddings. We
Speaker 2: talk about bridesmaids, disaster stories, and people that have called
Speaker 2: off weddings, called off in engagements. And season two launches
Speaker 2: next month and I'm super super excited about that. But yeah,
Speaker 2: so that's the Wedding to Life podcast and my personal
Speaker 2: social media is I add thank you nobody, thank you girl.
Speaker 2: I'm listening hands too. I am thank you. I'm getting
Speaker 2: engaged next year to Drake, so we probably ye come
Speaker 2: home my mom.
Speaker 1: I won't even look at him, no type of way.
Speaker 2: Everybody's young man, but everybody thanks everything. Oh the way
Speaker 2: she was like, y'all, she said, look at our man,
Speaker 2: good our husband. I was like, I s relieved for
Speaker 2: some reason, like not you know, yeah, yeah, y'all have it.
Speaker 1: You're right. I appreciate y'all having me on you do.
Speaker 2: Thank you so much Jennifer for joining We Talk Bat. Y'all.
Speaker 2: If you enjoyed this episode, y'all tune in every Thursday
Speaker 2: on your heart radio app and wherever the fuck you
Speaker 2: get your podcast at. This is your co host AJ
Speaker 2: Holiday two point zero on instagrams Kick a Tail y'all
Speaker 2: its official team on Instagram. Y'all follow me and if
Speaker 2: y'all enjoyed this episode, I really enjoyed this episode. It
Speaker 2: makes me so hopeful and I'm just like a hopeless
Speaker 2: romantic and I know some of you all are. So
Speaker 2: if you enjoy this, come back next week for a
Speaker 2: part two. We're gonna have another happy wife on y'all.
Speaker 2: Remember speak now and never hold your peace or meet
Speaker 2: like Drake, have a good day. Stop talking about my husband. Okay, bye, y'all.
Speaker 1: We Talk Back podcast is a production of iHeartRadio. Visit
Speaker 1: the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to
Speaker 1: your face a show