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Speaker 1: Welcome to We Talk Back podcast, the production of iHeartRadio

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Speaker 1: and the Black Effect Network.

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Speaker 2: Talk or Talk Talk to. We're just two unapologetically black

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Speaker 2: women with an opinion who talks. What's up, y'all? Thank

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Speaker 2: you for tuning in for a new episode that We

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Speaker 2: Talk Black, a show dedicated to these niggas in these hoes.

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Speaker 2: Oh not the niggas that we talked black for Black

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Speaker 2: History Month. Okay, now, hey y'all, it's Tan Van. I

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Speaker 2: love y'all. I feel like I haven't been telling them

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Speaker 2: I loved him a couple of weeks, but I do

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Speaker 2: love y'all. I want to remind y'all that you are

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Speaker 2: very much loved by We love you too. AJ. How'd you?

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Speaker 2: And was about nothing? Child? Line? Do shit? And I

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Speaker 2: can't wait till this weekend to not do shit? You're

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Speaker 2: not gonna watch the super Bowl? Is that this week Oh? Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I'm definite gonna try to find me a little kickback

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Speaker 2: this weekend. Yeah, I'm into this weekend. I forgot I

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Speaker 2: did do it. Haven't been following I noticed the forty

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Speaker 2: nine ers, the red team and the Blue team. Is

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Speaker 2: that really? Who's going to the Super Bowl? A red

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Speaker 2: team and a blue team. So I know, I know

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Speaker 2: there's a red one, the Chiefs. The Chiefs, well they're red,

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Speaker 2: the forty nine ers. What color are they are? They blue?

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Speaker 2: Red team? Right? Okay, then it's red. It gets red,

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Speaker 2: so it's Chiefs. It's a blood. It's a blood super

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Speaker 2: Bowl that was done, y'all. Ain't sure we know what

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Speaker 2: the fuck we talk about. Y'all can tell we don't

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Speaker 2: watch sports like that. It's the cheese, Travis Kel I need.

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Speaker 2: It's Taylor Swift. So I thought he played for the

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Speaker 2: forty nine Ers. I'm wrong. He played for the Chiefs.

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Speaker 2: Oh nah, I know that. So this is Taylor Swift's

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Speaker 2: first Super Bowl apparently, I just hit yeah, So it's

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Speaker 2: two red teens. I just hate, uh how they got

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Speaker 2: her taken over. Goddamn NFL man, this is just disgusting.

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Speaker 2: She didn't do it though, she just supporting her dude,

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Speaker 2: and everybody just making it about her. She has literally

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Speaker 2: come in and they have tried to take over swagsurfing

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Speaker 2: and also fades at this point. Okay, well you saw

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Speaker 2: the swag surf. Ain't no way they taking it over

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Speaker 2: because that shit was very was thirty. It was thirty

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Speaker 2: at all and in the fade. That is the funniest

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Speaker 2: shit to me. It's just it's how America was founded.

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Speaker 2: It stupid Internet new period, that's what the fuck America's

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Speaker 2: founded on on a motherfucker trying to say they started

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Speaker 2: something that they didn't you name. I guess we're in

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Speaker 2: stupid internet news. Travis Kelsey came out and said, like, uh,

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Speaker 2: I don't do that to me. I did not invent

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Speaker 2: that shit ever. People invent that shit. It's black history, mind.

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Speaker 2: I don't want no problems. Stop playing with whar he's won.

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Speaker 2: They was on some dumb shit man February one. They

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Speaker 2: don't care about us. All the white boys going to

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Speaker 2: get the Travis Kelsey, that's a boosty say he find now,

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Speaker 2: I go, lie, I much can lie. He is nice looking,

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Speaker 2: nice to look at. I don't even see him with

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Speaker 2: Taylor Swift for real, Like I don't know who she's

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Speaker 2: supposed to be. But he got a little bit too

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Speaker 2: much swag for tailors. He got swag. That's why I

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Speaker 2: say I don't think he I don't find him attractive.

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Speaker 2: I just think he's got a lot of swag. Because

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Speaker 2: if you cut that beard off and you've seen him

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Speaker 2: without the meatles. He like male Paul buyan As looking white,

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Speaker 2: brownie man, that's what he makes Johnny Ella seed for sure. Shame.

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Speaker 2: Let's talk about the Grammys. That's what I did. I

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Speaker 2: watched the Grammys. I enjoyed the Grammys this year. Did

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Speaker 2: you I didn't watch He's gonna be watching TV JA,

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Speaker 2: I didn't watch you, lay, I am lying. I let

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Speaker 2: my hookah. I had me a bottle of champagne and

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Speaker 2: I just watched the Grammys. I was singing. Fantasia made

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Speaker 2: me so proud. She looks so good. I'm just so

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Speaker 2: happy for her too. Yeah, she's like getting all the

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Speaker 2: accolades she has always deserved. Who else? Oh, Tracy Chapman

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Speaker 2: and I love that song. I love that remake fast, Yes,

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Speaker 2: what's the Guy's what's the guy? I don't know? Also

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Speaker 2: got that shit every single day comes on the radio.

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Speaker 2: I listened to that song. I love that. Yeah, that's songs.

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Speaker 2: And she looks so amazing. She looked good, She's aging

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Speaker 2: so beautifully. Them dimples aren't the thing is I never

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Speaker 2: realized that was her song. I didn't realize that when

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Speaker 2: they was playing with that shit on a living Color.

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Speaker 2: I didn't. I didn't realize that was a black woman's song. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 2: what God they had the sister playing her playing that

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Speaker 2: character in Living Color girl. I have no idea. What

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Speaker 2: you don't remember them doing that on Living Color, playing

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Speaker 2: and doing that song when the Living Color I don't know.

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Speaker 2: That's why I was able to watch him Living Color yet?

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Speaker 2: What your mommy? Lets you watch a kid? I was little? Okay,

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Speaker 2: I'm thinking about deaf comedy jam even deaf comedy jamiot Like,

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Speaker 2: what how old are you again? Never mind? So let's

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Speaker 2: keep playing. Yeah you might have been born Yeah I

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Speaker 2: was little. Yeah, you're right to that part. And Living Color?

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Speaker 2: What's that? So you never seen Martin either? I love

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Speaker 2: that show. I watched all the reruns. Shame. So the Grammy, y'all,

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Speaker 2: let's get into it right quick. So jay Z won

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Speaker 2: one of the most prominent awards. I would say at

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Speaker 2: the Grammy's Grammys. Maybe it's named at the Doctor Dre

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Speaker 2: is that Doctor Dre Global Impact Award, And in the

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Speaker 2: midst of his acceptance speech, he goes on to call

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Speaker 2: it the Grammys about how his wife ain't never one

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Speaker 2: album of the year. She got thirty sounds Grammys, but

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Speaker 2: for whatever reason, she keeps getting snubbed for Album of

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Speaker 2: the Year, while Taylor Swift won this past Sunday, that's

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Speaker 2: her fourth Grammy for Album of the Year. Ed labed

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Speaker 2: me to go listen to some Tailor Swift music. I

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Speaker 2: had to see what the fuck they be hearing. I

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Speaker 2: hear this shit on the radio. She doesn't have any

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Speaker 2: albums we could just listen straight through either. And I

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Speaker 2: feel like Beyonce has had several albums, especially Lemonade, she

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Speaker 2: should have gotten a Grammy for and she should have

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Speaker 2: called Beyonce on the stage like Beyonce did what she

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Speaker 2: won her first gram Remember when Kanye was like, I'm

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Speaker 2: gonna let you finish, but Beyonce, well, he didn't lie. Clearly,

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Speaker 2: he didn't lie. He wasn't not here. We all tend yet.

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Speaker 2: I think jay Z doing the same shit. Taylor swisherd

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Speaker 2: said I'm a finish, but Beyonce, can you come up here?

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Speaker 2: Because I feel like this should have been your or

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Speaker 2: some shit like that. You should have gotten this a

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Speaker 2: million years ago, right that way, though she probably doesn't

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Speaker 2: feel that way. It's because you know what, Celene Beyond

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Speaker 2: gave her the award and she did not even acknowledge

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Speaker 2: Selene beyond. I was upset with that, like, girl, how

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Speaker 2: are you gonna be standing right next to the queen

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Speaker 2: with that bob boy gone looking like a black girl

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Speaker 2: in that bob wig with them diamonds on the diamonds.

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Speaker 2: I couldn't even thee the diamonds was blinding me on

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Speaker 2: the TV screen. And you're not gonna acknowledge Selene And

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Speaker 2: she got health issues. She came out there for you, girl.

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Speaker 2: So let's talk about stats when it comes to Beyonce

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Speaker 2: and Taylor Swift. So it's this American songwriter. Taylor Swift

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Speaker 2: has released ten original studio studio albums. Beyonce has four.

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Speaker 2: Excuse me, Beyonce has seven to Taylor Swift's ten. Taylor

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Speaker 2: Taylor Swift has four re recorded UH studio albums, five

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Speaker 2: extended plays, and four live albums. She's sold and estimated

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Speaker 2: one hundred fourteen million album units worldwide, and in terms

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Speaker 2: of pure cells TA tally that forty six point six

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Speaker 2: million in the United States and seven million in the UK.

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Speaker 2: R IAA, which is the Recording Industry Association of America.

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Speaker 2: Her albums have garnered fifty one million certified units in

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Speaker 2: the United States. As of February twenty twenty four, she

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Speaker 2: is the solo artist with the most weeks most most

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Speaker 2: weeks sixty nine at number one on US Billboard two hundred.

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Speaker 2: So that's just a little, quick, little brief rundown of

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Speaker 2: Taylor Swift's whatever. Okay, so I hear it's Beyonce. Well,

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Speaker 2: but here's the thing. Taylor Swift her tour alsold Beyonce's

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Speaker 2: tour by dump did it? Are you sure googled it

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Speaker 2: last night? Yeah? I did. I know. She's just very

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Speaker 2: she's sure watchcraft, y'all ain't seeing that shit. I seen

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Speaker 2: those damn clips. She was literally in black hoods on stage. Listen,

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Speaker 2: she got it. They literally created a thing called post

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Speaker 2: concert amnesia because concert goers don't even remember attending the

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Speaker 2: Tailorswip concert. They created a syndrome for people after tailerslipt concert.

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Speaker 2: They don't even remember going. They don't ever, they don't

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Speaker 2: even remember what happened at the concert. They were there,

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Speaker 2: but they don't remember what happened. She fucking putting people

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Speaker 2: on the hypnosis. I'm convinced it's a real thing. So

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Speaker 2: what else happened? Killer Mike got arrested at the Grammys

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Speaker 2: after winning three Grammys. I like, he's an elder in

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Speaker 2: the hip hop, not an elder, and he won three Grammys.

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Speaker 2: Yeah he's you know, he's not twenty two. You can't

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Speaker 2: call that man older. But in hip hop. I don't know.

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Speaker 2: If you you don't think so I'm oldest Killing Mike,

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Speaker 2: he's you'd be like, what, forty five is forty six

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Speaker 2: years old? That's not an elder. You're like forty eight,

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Speaker 2: I think, so we call it. Okay, you really having

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Speaker 2: fun today, bitch. Well, I'm not calling him out elder

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Speaker 2: for the Earth. I'm not elder for the earth. I'm

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Speaker 2: calling it. Maybe that's not what I was saying. You know,

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Speaker 2: people were saying like, oh, you're too old, you're this,

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Speaker 2: you're that, and he's proven that that is not the case,

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Speaker 2: you know, So that's all I was alluding. I was

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Speaker 2: surprised I hadn't listened to any Killing Mike album. I

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Speaker 2: didn't realize he even had an album come out, And

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Speaker 2: I mean I really hadn't listened to that much new

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Speaker 2: music last year for real, unless you know, a little

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Speaker 2: singles and shit like that. I haven't really popped in

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Speaker 2: anybody's album. So I just was kind of under a

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Speaker 2: rock last year with music wise. I didn't realize he

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Speaker 2: had an album that even came out. Did you listen

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Speaker 2: to what she was listening to? You? I don't even

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Speaker 2: know shit, Reverend. I I listened up. I listened because

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Speaker 2: of the Scientists and Engineer single that Henry greyd that wards.

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Speaker 2: You heard that though, right, Oh, that's the thing. I

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Speaker 2: hadn't heard them. I hadn't and maybe I've heard it

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Speaker 2: and this just don't remember. I don't know. I got

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Speaker 2: to listen to it again, but into world news, y'all,

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Speaker 2: Son and Nigga got arrested for what though? Oh we're

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Speaker 2: going back to that. Yeah, okay, that's the when he

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Speaker 2: got arrested because he had a altercation with one of

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Speaker 2: the security guards at the Grammys. And I think it

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Speaker 2: was just like a very over zealous security guard that

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Speaker 2: just wanted to prove a port that you can't play

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Speaker 2: with him. He top flight, so they came and got

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Speaker 2: him up out of there over something stupid. It really

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Speaker 2: was trying to act like he ain't killing Nigga just

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Speaker 2: won three Grammys. You don't know who I am. I

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Speaker 2: bet you was a black ride. Oh yeah, probably. You

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Speaker 2: know they take their security job X football player. When

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Speaker 2: them ex football players become security guards, that'd be disgruntled.

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Speaker 2: In light of the Grammys And like I said, I

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Speaker 2: was talking about Taylor Swift's disco it's a discoography, pstography Beyonce. Okay, So,

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Speaker 2: American singer Beyonce has released seven studio albums, five live albums,

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Speaker 2: three compilation albums, five EPs, one soundtrack album, and two

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Speaker 2: karaoke albums. I don't know what the fuck a karaoke

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Speaker 2: album is, but I want to do them so to date.

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Speaker 2: To date, Beyonce has sold over two hundred million records

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Speaker 2: worldwide as a solo artist, making her one of the

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Speaker 2: best selling music artists of all time. Billboard ringd her

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Speaker 2: as a thirty seventh greatest artist of all time. I

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Speaker 2: don't know where Taylor Swift rings amongst all the greats

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Speaker 2: that we've had, because given her these four Grammys, that

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Speaker 2: means she's we not talk about Taylor Swift. We talk

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Speaker 2: about in this moment. Let see, she's better than I'm

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Speaker 2: just doing a comparison. Still, that means she's better than

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Speaker 2: Michael Jackson at this point anyway. So The Recording Industry

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Speaker 2: Association Association of America recognized her as the top certified

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Speaker 2: certified artist is so Beyonce Okay of the two thousands decade.

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Speaker 2: According to our IAA, Beyonce has sold thirty point five

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Speaker 2: million albums in the United States, and as of November

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Speaker 2: twenty twenty three, the RIAA list her total certified sales

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Speaker 2: as a solo artist, including features as over one hundred

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Speaker 2: and seventy four million in the United States. So Beyonce

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Speaker 2: is gonna be our batty. Beyonce should have got the

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Speaker 2: goddamn Grammy. Okay, Beyonce, we salute you. You are baddy

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Speaker 2: who toss back for this week? Girl. We love you,

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Speaker 2: and I'm gonna put tailor swift ass in a freezer.

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Speaker 2: They are not winning the super Bowl this year, okay?

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Speaker 2: But ill world news. All right, y'all come close to

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Speaker 2: how you're listening to the device, however you listening it is, y'll.

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Speaker 2: Drake Dick was leaked. Drake's Dick was lead. Drake. I

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Speaker 2: was so upset Dick is leaking. Don't do that. I

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Speaker 2: can lie. I much can lie. That was a nice wikipedist, Drake,

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Speaker 2: nice Wickoripedia It is nice and long. It wasn't extremely girthy,

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Speaker 2: but it wasn't all the way you know, full. It

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Speaker 2: was a half tub, so it might you know, expand

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Speaker 2: a little. I feel like you put that shit out.

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Speaker 2: I just don't see Drake fucking with somebody at this

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Speaker 2: point where they would do something like that, like where

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Speaker 2: you gotta have a little bit more discernment than to

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Speaker 2: be fucking with a bitch and they put your dick

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Speaker 2: on the internet like that. Yeah, I hate that for

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Speaker 2: him us. I hate that for us because everybody just

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Speaker 2: see our mand. My sister gonna message me like, hey,

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Speaker 2: you got the Drake video. I was like yes, She's like,

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Speaker 2: can you send it to me? I was like absolutely not.

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Speaker 2: She was like why. I was like, I'm not sitting

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Speaker 2: you my man's dig Like, that's weird for you to

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Speaker 2: even ask me for that. She was like, bitch, just

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Speaker 2: send it. That's not your man, that's not your man.

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Speaker 2: Man like me in one here, like all the dudes

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Speaker 2: like on Twitter on excuse me, it's talking about Drake

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Speaker 2: got all the holes, money and an XX Glizzie. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: it's just too much winning for him. It's disgusting. Man. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I like cockshots though, Like, I want to know who

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Speaker 2: the fuck got that cock shot? Who you said that?

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Speaker 2: That did look all manicure right, that dig look like

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Speaker 2: it had just been through like a manicure session, like

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Speaker 2: it was all nicely. He was tapping that hairy eyeshole too,

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Speaker 2: with the blanket right there, Like, did y'all see our

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Speaker 2: producer tailor? She pulls her little picture and at Drake

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Speaker 2: on Instagram or her Instagram story. Yeah, I was really

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Speaker 2: get at her for that this way, but I was

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Speaker 2: just like, you know what, I'm gonna let her hand dad.

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Speaker 2: She got into her little picture and she hat but

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Speaker 2: I was like, no, cause you got Tyler Lepli or

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Speaker 2: whatever his name is. You already got pictures with that nigga,

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Speaker 2: and now here you come popping out with my you

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Speaker 2: know that's my nigger you posted. Look, Drake had his

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Speaker 2: arm round tailor neck. I now I felt. I'm like, wait,

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Speaker 2: why you got his hand right your neck like that?

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Speaker 2: Like he was like, yeah, he was showing her a

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Speaker 2: little bit. I cut the turrn one a little bit.

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Speaker 2: I don't know, but I'm like, why why Drake got

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Speaker 2: his hair on your neck like that tailor top? But

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Speaker 2: he know what's up. You better get tailor girl. She

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Speaker 2: better take your man. I would hate the choke slam

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Speaker 2: Taylor ass somewhere would hate to do that to her.

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Speaker 2: That's not your nigga. Okay, my man, y'all, If you

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Speaker 2: ever happened between me and Drake, just know that I

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Speaker 2: manifested it here with you listeners. Believe it in it

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Speaker 2: right here on this show man from day one, from

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Speaker 2: episode one, Yeah, really want Drake. What I do that

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Speaker 2: is not even your type. He's not my type. But

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Speaker 2: I'm a huge fan and I love him so much.

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Speaker 2: So y'all, we was at Drake concert. This bitch ain't

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Speaker 2: no naw Drake song. That's a lie. I do all

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Speaker 2: the songs. All the real fans were singing the hell

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Speaker 2: out that nigga song We like No that was twenty one.

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Speaker 2: Savage said, I didn't know that's what it was. You

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Speaker 2: was ready hanging on my love life right now, and

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Speaker 2: I just don't appreciate it between you and Taylor today.

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Speaker 2: It's just die Taylor. One step, I'm closer than you, bitch.

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Speaker 2: You better get she is. But that's okay because I'm

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Speaker 2: going to see Drake again. And two where he gonna

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Speaker 2: be at hand he back on tour with Ja Cole. Interesting,

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Speaker 2: he gonna be in Ohio. They had Drake, you know

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Speaker 2: through your bronze age, tam Bam coming, I ain't gonna

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Speaker 2: have one one. So tam Bam coming to see your baby?

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Speaker 2: All right, what are we do we have anything else

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Speaker 2: for stupid? I think that's that man. That's a whole

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Speaker 2: like a lot of gang shit going on, uh this week,

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Speaker 2: but Drake just ruined the internet for the day. I

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Speaker 2: think I haven't really been back on and see what

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Speaker 2: the fuck people talk about about that dick. But yeah,

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Speaker 2: m my mom would call me this morning and she

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Speaker 2: was listening to the episode with the Jody you know,

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Speaker 2: teaching us how to you know, suck dick. And my

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Speaker 2: mom was like, you know what, what was she teaching

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Speaker 2: us to suck dick? Well, she she didn't teach us,

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Speaker 2: but she said she could like she has closely choreography

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Speaker 2: class for a second dick. Okay, yeah yeah, And my

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Speaker 2: mom said, good morning, baby, Can I just say something?

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Speaker 2: I said, yes, ma'am. She was like, every time I

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Speaker 2: think we can't get to a new level of what

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Speaker 2: the fuck you and AJ take it y'all will take

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Speaker 2: it to a new level of what the It's not

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Speaker 2: really us taking it to a new level. It's the

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Speaker 2: guess that's what I said. She said, well, you brought

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Speaker 2: them on there, didn't you. I was like, yes, I did.

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Speaker 2: We all just be be doing like shit for research purposes. Okay,

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Speaker 2: it's just a little high. We have hypotheses ed education, edumacation.

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Speaker 2: That's all speaking of education, all right. So I was

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Speaker 2: really like, in my feelings, this is the ninth year

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Speaker 2: in a row that I have not had a Valentine,

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Speaker 2: And I was like, just you know, I'm still hopeful,

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Speaker 2: and I still like what love, and I'm still like,

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Speaker 2: I hope it's romantic regardless. If you want to see

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Speaker 2: something good, watch The Valve. If you want to be

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Speaker 2: all in the field. That's a good movie on Netflix

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Speaker 2: right now, the vowel. But I was scrolling and I

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Speaker 2: was seeing like this post. I can't remember whose page

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Speaker 2: it was on, but it was like tag the happiest wife,

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Speaker 2: you know. So I went in there and I started

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Speaker 2: reading a women who were tagged, but the ones that

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Speaker 2: I who I was most impressed with were the wives

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Speaker 2: who tagged themselves. So I messaged those wives and I

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Speaker 2: asked them to come on this show and talk about

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Speaker 2: why you're the happiest wife, because I want us to

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Speaker 2: be hopeful, I want us to find love, and I

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Speaker 2: want us to grow. So we'll be right back with

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Speaker 2: our first guest. Who's gonna talk about why she's the

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Speaker 2: happiest wife. EM Okay, guys, we're back. And y'all know

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Speaker 2: I'm a hopeless romantic. So I was scrolling and I

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Speaker 2: just saw this beautiful post about the happiest wife. So

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Speaker 2: I got to dig it through the comments to seeing

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Speaker 2: who they were shouting out to be the happiest wife.

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Speaker 2: And then I was more impressed with the women who

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Speaker 2: were saying that they were the happiest wife themselves, because

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Speaker 2: you know, outside I can thank you the happiest wife.

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Speaker 2: You may not be, but these women were saying, no, baby,

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Speaker 2: look at me, because I am the happiest wife. And

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Speaker 2: I came across this one profile for our guest, Jennifer Allen.

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Speaker 1: Thank you for joining us, thanks for having me.

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Speaker 2: And she is the CEO of Justin Loaf LLC in Dallas, Texas,

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Speaker 2: where she creates traades micro weddings all over Dallas.

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Speaker 1: Thank you for joining us, girl, thanks for having me.

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Speaker 2: Tell us what makes you that? Like? What made you

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Speaker 2: decide to say tight? Right there? I am the happiest wife.

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Speaker 2: Don't play with me.

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Speaker 1: Don't play with it, because, let me tell you something.

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Speaker 1: My husband is. He is top tier.

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Speaker 2: He has been intentional about being a husband, not just

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Speaker 2: wanting a wife since I met him, and we have

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Speaker 2: been married for thirteen years and we have three sons, eleven,

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Speaker 2: nine and two, and every day that we've been together,

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Speaker 2: I've never had to question whether or not I am

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Speaker 2: enough for him, whether he loves me, whether I am.

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Speaker 1: Secure within our relationship.

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Speaker 2: And that's not to say that we don't have issues

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Speaker 2: or petty arguments or that sort of thing, but it's

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Speaker 2: this security that comes with no matter what.

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Speaker 1: He can be upset with me.

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Speaker 2: If he leaves out the house, he gonna bring me

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Speaker 2: something back. If he goes to go do something, he

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Speaker 2: gonna I'll be back. I'm about to go do whatever.

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Speaker 2: It's no storm out of the house. It's all this

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Speaker 2: security of no matter what, you are the most important

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Speaker 2: thing to me. Even though you're getting on my last

377
00:22:45,800 --> 00:22:48,720
Speaker 2: nerve at this moment, and I'm sure our work is nerve,

378
00:22:48,800 --> 00:22:52,679
Speaker 2: but I don't care how long did y'all date before

379
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Speaker 2: you got married? So we met in January two thousand

380
00:22:57,160 --> 00:23:00,640
Speaker 2: and nine, and we got married in July two thousand,

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00:23:00,840 --> 00:23:04,959
Speaker 2: so you knew that quickly, yes, So on our So

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Speaker 2: I met my husband on my Space, so let's start there.

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00:23:14,080 --> 00:23:16,679
Speaker 2: So I and what so random is I had not

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Speaker 2: been on my Space in years, right, like so long?

385
00:23:21,080 --> 00:23:25,399
Speaker 2: Facebook was popping then had been and so long. And

386
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Speaker 2: my best friend was likeirl, I walked into my MySpace

387
00:23:28,040 --> 00:23:31,159
Speaker 2: page the other day and I'm like, let me get

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00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:33,920
Speaker 2: on here and see. And I don't know how whether

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00:23:33,960 --> 00:23:35,679
Speaker 2: he has sent me a message. So much time has

390
00:23:35,720 --> 00:23:38,600
Speaker 2: passed since since then, but I don't know how we

391
00:23:38,760 --> 00:23:42,359
Speaker 2: end up connecting. We exchange, we end up exchanging phone

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Speaker 2: numbers like that same day, talked on the phone all day.

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Speaker 1: On a it was a Saturday.

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Speaker 2: We talked on the phone all day long, and then

395
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Speaker 2: he was like, man, I wish I could see, but

396
00:23:53,440 --> 00:23:56,560
Speaker 2: I got to go to work tomorrow. He's nineteen years old, right,

397
00:23:56,640 --> 00:24:01,399
Speaker 2: so kids, And so I'm like, oh, don't don't stop

398
00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:03,640
Speaker 2: your bag behind me, like go, you know, go take

399
00:24:03,640 --> 00:24:06,399
Speaker 2: care of your business. So the next day he calls

400
00:24:06,440 --> 00:24:10,040
Speaker 2: me and He's like, what you're doing today? And I'm like, nothing,

401
00:24:10,560 --> 00:24:12,640
Speaker 2: what you doing? I thought you had to go to work.

402
00:24:13,080 --> 00:24:16,639
Speaker 2: He's like I'm sick. I'm like, oh hell la la.

403
00:24:17,160 --> 00:24:22,760
Speaker 2: I'm like, yo, you've got his full work. If you

404
00:24:22,880 --> 00:24:25,000
Speaker 2: feel to take off of your job from some cheek

405
00:24:25,080 --> 00:24:27,439
Speaker 2: you demit on the internet, you FeelA not go to

406
00:24:27,480 --> 00:24:30,240
Speaker 2: work behind somebody you don't even know.

407
00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:34,159
Speaker 1: And we end up going to the to Rezus and

408
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Speaker 1: going to.

409
00:24:34,640 --> 00:24:37,119
Speaker 2: The movies and he went with me to Walmart so

410
00:24:37,160 --> 00:24:40,439
Speaker 2: I can get my little groceries for the week and

411
00:24:41,040 --> 00:24:43,520
Speaker 2: we had a really good, like just a really good time.

412
00:24:43,960 --> 00:24:47,440
Speaker 2: So that was a Sunday. That Wednesday, he came over

413
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Speaker 2: my house and he was like, we are gonna get married.

414
00:24:51,200 --> 00:24:54,480
Speaker 2: And I'm like, boy, you are just trying to get

415
00:24:54,480 --> 00:24:57,320
Speaker 2: you some and you don't have to say all that

416
00:24:57,680 --> 00:25:03,520
Speaker 2: because I'm finna give it to you, so you don't

417
00:25:03,520 --> 00:25:04,479
Speaker 2: gotta gas me up.

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00:25:04,640 --> 00:25:05,800
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, Like.

419
00:25:05,760 --> 00:25:08,840
Speaker 2: I don't, I don't need this has happening because I

420
00:25:08,960 --> 00:25:10,879
Speaker 2: wanted to happen. This has nothing to do with you

421
00:25:11,000 --> 00:25:15,119
Speaker 2: telling me that we're gonna get married. And he was like, no, like,

422
00:25:15,200 --> 00:25:17,520
Speaker 2: we're we're gonna get married. I'm like, all right, whatever.

423
00:25:18,080 --> 00:25:24,480
Speaker 2: So literally we became inseparable from that moment on and

424
00:25:24,840 --> 00:25:27,520
Speaker 2: I had just got out of relationship a couple months prior,

425
00:25:28,080 --> 00:25:32,080
Speaker 2: and I was really on some like I'm setting boundaries

426
00:25:32,119 --> 00:25:34,800
Speaker 2: with people and whoever don't get it, don't get it.

427
00:25:35,280 --> 00:25:37,760
Speaker 2: So he would come stay the night at my house

428
00:25:38,160 --> 00:25:40,879
Speaker 2: and I told him, I said, hey, if you stay

429
00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:44,879
Speaker 2: here seven times throughout the month, you're gonna have to

430
00:25:44,920 --> 00:25:48,520
Speaker 2: pay my light bill because you over here using electricity

431
00:25:48,560 --> 00:25:51,399
Speaker 2: to microwaves, like you just because he lived with his

432
00:25:51,480 --> 00:25:54,919
Speaker 2: mom and so he was in the military waiting orders

433
00:25:55,040 --> 00:25:57,720
Speaker 2: and so I'm like, you, my light bill was like

434
00:25:58,160 --> 00:26:00,439
Speaker 2: sixty dollars. They weren't even like it was like crazy,

435
00:26:01,480 --> 00:26:02,800
Speaker 2: And so he was there.

436
00:26:02,840 --> 00:26:04,000
Speaker 1: At the end of the month, came.

437
00:26:03,920 --> 00:26:07,679
Speaker 2: I'm like, I need my sixty three fifty more, like

438
00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:12,960
Speaker 2: where where's where's my money at? And he and he

439
00:26:13,000 --> 00:26:15,200
Speaker 2: paid it, and like I didn't have cable, and he

440
00:26:15,200 --> 00:26:17,960
Speaker 2: would come over there and he was like, you don't

441
00:26:17,960 --> 00:26:20,560
Speaker 2: have cable. You just watching DVD's. Rest or red Box

442
00:26:20,720 --> 00:26:23,480
Speaker 2: was BD. He's like, you just watching DVD's.

443
00:26:23,040 --> 00:26:23,560
Speaker 1: All the time.

444
00:26:23,920 --> 00:26:27,919
Speaker 2: I'm like, I have to choose between being able to

445
00:26:27,920 --> 00:26:32,080
Speaker 2: consistently keep my nails done or having cable, and I'm

446
00:26:32,200 --> 00:26:35,080
Speaker 2: choosing my nails, And so I said, if you want

447
00:26:35,119 --> 00:26:37,399
Speaker 2: me to have cable, then you get the cable.

448
00:26:37,400 --> 00:26:39,760
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't need no cable. And so he

449
00:26:39,880 --> 00:26:40,639
Speaker 1: got the cable.

450
00:26:41,600 --> 00:26:43,359
Speaker 2: And so when I would leave to go to work,

451
00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:47,560
Speaker 2: I would make him reap get up too, like you

452
00:26:47,720 --> 00:26:50,000
Speaker 2: got you gotta go to work, So you head back

453
00:26:50,040 --> 00:26:51,600
Speaker 2: to where you're going, because you're just not finna be

454
00:26:51,640 --> 00:26:55,159
Speaker 2: land up in my house. And so it started to

455
00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:58,000
Speaker 2: go to where I would we would leave at the

456
00:26:58,040 --> 00:27:00,560
Speaker 2: same time. Then it would be when he would leave,

457
00:27:00,640 --> 00:27:03,360
Speaker 2: he would bring my key to my job. And then

458
00:27:03,400 --> 00:27:05,600
Speaker 2: that turned into him saying, well, can I just have

459
00:27:05,920 --> 00:27:08,359
Speaker 2: a key? And so I was like, well, you know

460
00:27:08,520 --> 00:27:11,320
Speaker 2: you've never had an apartment before, so let me explain

461
00:27:11,400 --> 00:27:14,359
Speaker 2: to you how it works. When you go into the

462
00:27:14,480 --> 00:27:16,800
Speaker 2: lease in office and you sign on the paper and

463
00:27:16,840 --> 00:27:19,840
Speaker 2: say you're gonna pay the full month's rent, they give

464
00:27:19,880 --> 00:27:22,920
Speaker 2: you a key. I said, so I don't need a roommate,

465
00:27:23,720 --> 00:27:26,160
Speaker 2: So if you want a key, then you need to pay.

466
00:27:27,080 --> 00:27:28,040
Speaker 1: You need to pay the rent.

467
00:27:29,040 --> 00:27:31,159
Speaker 2: And so I said, but you don't make enough money

468
00:27:32,040 --> 00:27:35,400
Speaker 2: to pay the rent, and be my boyfriend.

469
00:27:36,119 --> 00:27:41,080
Speaker 1: Like to take me somewhere. So I'm so I am,

470
00:27:41,240 --> 00:27:44,600
Speaker 1: I'm I'm three years older than than than my husband.

471
00:27:45,040 --> 00:27:48,320
Speaker 2: And so, like I said, I had just dated somebody

472
00:27:48,320 --> 00:27:52,399
Speaker 2: who was trash on top of trash, and I just

473
00:27:52,480 --> 00:27:55,600
Speaker 2: knew what I did not want to continue to deal with.

474
00:27:56,520 --> 00:28:00,800
Speaker 2: And so he was like okay. So like the next month,

475
00:28:00,880 --> 00:28:03,959
Speaker 2: he had got a new job, and he came in

476
00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:07,639
Speaker 2: there and slapped the money order on the table and

477
00:28:07,840 --> 00:28:10,640
Speaker 2: was like, hey, give me my key. I'm like, boy,

478
00:28:10,680 --> 00:28:13,560
Speaker 2: you can have my key. Used to get in the door.

479
00:28:13,600 --> 00:28:15,280
Speaker 1: I'm knocked on the door to get it there. I

480
00:28:15,320 --> 00:28:24,520
Speaker 1: don't care. I see if I could come over because

481
00:28:25,320 --> 00:28:26,160
Speaker 1: I don't care.

482
00:28:26,440 --> 00:28:31,080
Speaker 2: You got it? So we we we we kept dating,

483
00:28:31,160 --> 00:28:35,760
Speaker 2: he moved in. We were getting serious, and then in

484
00:28:35,880 --> 00:28:38,520
Speaker 2: October of that year, so we met in January. So

485
00:28:38,520 --> 00:28:42,360
Speaker 2: by the time October came, we were we were I mean,

486
00:28:42,400 --> 00:28:45,080
Speaker 2: it was it was serious. It was you know, we

487
00:28:45,080 --> 00:28:47,760
Speaker 2: were locked in. And I told him, I said, well,

488
00:28:47,800 --> 00:28:51,320
Speaker 2: my my lease is up and I'm gonna move to

489
00:28:51,360 --> 00:28:54,840
Speaker 2: another apartment inside of my complex. And I said, you

490
00:28:54,960 --> 00:28:58,000
Speaker 2: cannot come with me, And he was like, what do

491
00:28:58,040 --> 00:29:04,120
Speaker 2: you mean. I said, you've never experienced living by yourself before.

492
00:29:04,960 --> 00:29:08,200
Speaker 2: And I know that you do a great job of

493
00:29:08,840 --> 00:29:12,720
Speaker 2: taking care of things in the house with me together,

494
00:29:13,360 --> 00:29:15,400
Speaker 2: but I need to know that you could take care

495
00:29:15,440 --> 00:29:18,960
Speaker 2: of yourself by yourself, I said, because if you're gonna

496
00:29:18,960 --> 00:29:21,520
Speaker 2: be my husband, you're gonna be these things. I don't

497
00:29:21,520 --> 00:29:23,600
Speaker 2: want you to feel like you missed out on living alone.

498
00:29:23,640 --> 00:29:26,560
Speaker 2: I don't want you to feel like, you know, I

499
00:29:26,640 --> 00:29:28,840
Speaker 2: need to see that you can remember to pay your bills,

500
00:29:28,880 --> 00:29:31,720
Speaker 2: because they your bills to pay, nine need bringing them up,

501
00:29:31,800 --> 00:29:33,360
Speaker 2: you know, and that sort of thing. How old were

502
00:29:33,440 --> 00:29:36,479
Speaker 2: you on it too, cause that's a very much. So

503
00:29:37,880 --> 00:29:42,760
Speaker 2: I was twenty three. So when we met, he was nineteen.

504
00:29:42,880 --> 00:29:45,800
Speaker 2: I was twenty two, and then he turned twenty in March,

505
00:29:46,200 --> 00:29:49,160
Speaker 2: and then I turned twenty three in June, and so

506
00:29:49,960 --> 00:29:52,680
Speaker 2: I was like, you know, I just I just don't.

507
00:29:53,200 --> 00:29:55,360
Speaker 1: I just need to know a baby.

508
00:29:55,400 --> 00:29:58,440
Speaker 2: That man told me, if you move out this apartment

509
00:29:58,560 --> 00:30:01,600
Speaker 2: and I don't go with you, we are done.

510
00:30:01,880 --> 00:30:04,200
Speaker 1: And I said, well, I guess we're done.

511
00:30:05,600 --> 00:30:11,320
Speaker 2: And I told my mama and she was like, Jennifer, okay,

512
00:30:11,920 --> 00:30:14,640
Speaker 2: And I said what, She's like nothing, And so we

513
00:30:15,280 --> 00:30:17,960
Speaker 2: just kind of left it alone. He ended up getting

514
00:30:17,960 --> 00:30:22,920
Speaker 2: his own apartment. I moved into my apartment and he

515
00:30:23,040 --> 00:30:26,240
Speaker 2: stopped talking to me. We broke up, we were done.

516
00:30:26,920 --> 00:30:28,680
Speaker 2: His mama tried to hook him up with the lady

517
00:30:28,720 --> 00:30:31,720
Speaker 2: with the girl across the street and went to Ikea. Yeah,

518
00:30:31,760 --> 00:30:34,320
Speaker 2: there was Ikea and everything. I said, oh, I know,

519
00:30:34,400 --> 00:30:36,240
Speaker 2: you ain't out here picking our feelings with a bitch

520
00:30:36,560 --> 00:30:38,600
Speaker 2: like they what's the ike up?

521
00:30:40,160 --> 00:30:41,520
Speaker 1: My feelings is crushed.

522
00:30:41,640 --> 00:30:42,880
Speaker 2: I faill, what.

523
00:30:44,440 --> 00:30:46,200
Speaker 1: Are you serious right now?

524
00:30:47,280 --> 00:30:49,880
Speaker 2: And I was talking to my mom about it, and

525
00:30:49,920 --> 00:30:52,560
Speaker 2: she said, you know, I really need for you to

526
00:30:52,680 --> 00:30:57,360
Speaker 2: understand that Tavares is a good man. Because he's a

527
00:30:57,400 --> 00:30:59,840
Speaker 2: good man. It has nothing to do with you. So

528
00:31:00,040 --> 00:31:02,640
Speaker 2: he's going to be a good man to whoever he's with,

529
00:31:03,720 --> 00:31:06,920
Speaker 2: not just you. So if you want to keep this

530
00:31:07,080 --> 00:31:09,680
Speaker 2: going and be on your high horse, and I'm putting

531
00:31:09,680 --> 00:31:13,000
Speaker 2: my foot down, I'm setting boundaries, She's like, you are

532
00:31:13,080 --> 00:31:15,920
Speaker 2: going to miss out. And she's like, so you do

533
00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:17,560
Speaker 2: with that what you want to do with the I'm

534
00:31:17,560 --> 00:31:19,400
Speaker 2: not telling you who you're supposed to be with, but

535
00:31:19,760 --> 00:31:21,120
Speaker 2: you do what you want to.

536
00:31:21,120 --> 00:31:21,640
Speaker 1: Do with it.

537
00:31:22,440 --> 00:31:26,080
Speaker 2: And I ended up needing to go get my tooth pulled,

538
00:31:26,120 --> 00:31:28,280
Speaker 2: and I'm like, I mean, I'm like, can you please

539
00:31:28,320 --> 00:31:30,400
Speaker 2: take me to the dnist? I can't drive myself back

540
00:31:30,840 --> 00:31:34,479
Speaker 2: back home. And he was like, yeah, that's fine. So

541
00:31:35,320 --> 00:31:37,360
Speaker 2: he took me to the dentist and when it was over,

542
00:31:37,400 --> 00:31:40,600
Speaker 2: it was like a traumatic experience. And then he was like, well,

543
00:31:40,600 --> 00:31:43,400
Speaker 2: you just come back to my apartment. And I ended

544
00:31:43,480 --> 00:31:50,840
Speaker 2: up being in his house for like three weeks and.

545
00:31:48,480 --> 00:31:49,320
Speaker 1: We were back together.

546
00:31:50,560 --> 00:31:56,360
Speaker 2: And that was in April of twenty twenty April of

547
00:31:56,520 --> 00:32:01,320
Speaker 2: two thousand and ten, and then in he found out

548
00:32:01,320 --> 00:32:04,880
Speaker 2: that he was going to be leaving for deployment, and

549
00:32:04,960 --> 00:32:07,280
Speaker 2: so we kind of had this conversation like, hey, I know,

550
00:32:07,320 --> 00:32:09,920
Speaker 2: we just got back together, Like this doesn't have to

551
00:32:09,920 --> 00:32:12,320
Speaker 2: be a thing, Like we can you know, call this

552
00:32:12,440 --> 00:32:14,960
Speaker 2: all and he was like no, like this is this

553
00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:15,720
Speaker 2: is where I want to be.

554
00:32:15,760 --> 00:32:17,960
Speaker 1: I'm like good because me too, because.

555
00:32:17,680 --> 00:32:20,040
Speaker 2: I'm at I don't want to I don't want.

556
00:32:19,840 --> 00:32:22,840
Speaker 1: To do that. Yeah, exactly, I don't want to go nowhere.

557
00:32:23,360 --> 00:32:30,360
Speaker 2: And we decided before he left for deployment and he

558
00:32:30,040 --> 00:32:32,800
Speaker 2: he went he went to San Diego for trainings and

559
00:32:32,920 --> 00:32:35,240
Speaker 2: Navy went to San Diego for a training. He came

560
00:32:35,320 --> 00:32:41,160
Speaker 2: back in July and he proposed and he proposed on

561
00:32:41,200 --> 00:32:47,200
Speaker 2: a Thursday, and we got married that next Tuesday, and

562
00:32:47,320 --> 00:32:51,160
Speaker 2: so we went to city Hall and got married and

563
00:32:51,720 --> 00:32:56,400
Speaker 2: we've been married for thirteen years. And I it has

564
00:32:56,480 --> 00:33:02,840
Speaker 2: been when you get married young, it's difficult because you

565
00:33:02,880 --> 00:33:06,240
Speaker 2: are growing up in front of somebody else and all

566
00:33:06,320 --> 00:33:14,760
Speaker 2: of your eyes, all of your flaws are on display,

567
00:33:15,440 --> 00:33:20,320
Speaker 2: and all of your wants and needs and desires, they're

568
00:33:20,680 --> 00:33:24,480
Speaker 2: constantly changing and shifting, and you're doing this with somebody else.

569
00:33:25,200 --> 00:33:28,200
Speaker 2: And then you become parents, and so now you're not

570
00:33:28,200 --> 00:33:29,880
Speaker 2: only trying to figure out, you know, how to be

571
00:33:30,600 --> 00:33:33,000
Speaker 2: a husband and a wife, but now a mother and

572
00:33:33,040 --> 00:33:35,040
Speaker 2: a father. But I'm still trying to figure out how

573
00:33:35,040 --> 00:33:37,080
Speaker 2: to be Jennifer. I'm still trying to figure out, you know,

574
00:33:37,720 --> 00:33:43,680
Speaker 2: what I'm doing with myself. And it has been the

575
00:33:43,720 --> 00:33:48,440
Speaker 2: best journey now when I look back on it, because

576
00:33:49,480 --> 00:33:54,160
Speaker 2: all the things that are good about my accomplishments, people say, oh,

577
00:33:54,200 --> 00:33:56,600
Speaker 2: you're so awesome. Oh you've been on Netflix, Love is bla,

578
00:33:56,720 --> 00:33:58,680
Speaker 2: Oh you married to Brad and Judy all you did this,

579
00:33:58,800 --> 00:34:02,280
Speaker 2: Oh you did that, And I'm like, I would not

580
00:34:02,320 --> 00:34:05,040
Speaker 2: have been able to do any of these things had

581
00:34:05,040 --> 00:34:08,399
Speaker 2: I not had my husband. Number One, hyping me up

582
00:34:08,960 --> 00:34:12,240
Speaker 2: so tough to say you deserve all of that, go

583
00:34:12,320 --> 00:34:15,359
Speaker 2: do it, you should do it, and him being here

584
00:34:15,360 --> 00:34:18,080
Speaker 2: to be a great dad to his kids, because kids,

585
00:34:18,080 --> 00:34:25,960
Speaker 2: well I'm set you right, I'm out here frolicing around town. Oh, Jennifer,

586
00:34:25,960 --> 00:34:27,840
Speaker 2: we thought he was in Chicago to speak an event.

587
00:34:28,239 --> 00:34:31,200
Speaker 1: Yeah. And I got three children, you know, And so

588
00:34:31,960 --> 00:34:36,160
Speaker 1: my husband is an amazing dad. You know.

589
00:34:36,320 --> 00:34:39,960
Speaker 2: I often tell him that he's truly the dad that

590
00:34:40,040 --> 00:34:42,600
Speaker 2: I wish that I had grown up and to see

591
00:34:42,640 --> 00:34:47,200
Speaker 2: him with our sons, it gives it almost makes me

592
00:34:47,640 --> 00:34:51,799
Speaker 2: jealous sometimes because it's like me and I wish I

593
00:34:51,840 --> 00:34:56,640
Speaker 2: had that, Like I wish I could have experienced what

594
00:34:56,680 --> 00:35:01,319
Speaker 2: it was like to have a dad who was so

595
00:35:01,440 --> 00:35:05,959
Speaker 2: intentional and so involved in everything that I that I did.

596
00:35:07,200 --> 00:35:12,120
Speaker 1: My dad really didn't come around until I became me. Now.

597
00:35:12,440 --> 00:35:14,400
Speaker 1: You know, when it's cute to say.

598
00:35:14,200 --> 00:35:16,560
Speaker 2: Oh, look with my daughter, like what's and my daughter,

599
00:35:16,800 --> 00:35:20,560
Speaker 2: you know, look what she's doing right right? And so

600
00:35:20,640 --> 00:35:25,120
Speaker 2: it's like, yes, in spite of you know, so my

601
00:35:25,239 --> 00:35:28,840
Speaker 2: husband is just I would shout from the rooftops to

602
00:35:28,920 --> 00:35:32,000
Speaker 2: anybody you know that I'm the happiest wife, not because

603
00:35:33,640 --> 00:35:37,400
Speaker 2: we have this fairy tale love. But it is the

604
00:35:37,480 --> 00:35:43,680
Speaker 2: securest thing I've ever experienced in my life. To have

605
00:35:43,760 --> 00:35:46,759
Speaker 2: somebody who you don't have to question whether or not

606
00:35:47,600 --> 00:35:53,399
Speaker 2: your best intentions are their main intentions, and to know

607
00:35:54,120 --> 00:35:56,440
Speaker 2: that it's not going to get out, like if it

608
00:35:56,520 --> 00:36:02,879
Speaker 2: comes down out, they come down to it, he raised

609
00:36:02,920 --> 00:36:06,280
Speaker 2: throw them hands behind his woman. And so the fact,

610
00:36:06,400 --> 00:36:09,800
Speaker 2: the fact that I know that also gives me the

611
00:36:09,960 --> 00:36:13,600
Speaker 2: security to know that you know, it is what it is.

612
00:36:13,680 --> 00:36:18,080
Speaker 2: And I just look forward to what we can keep

613
00:36:18,120 --> 00:36:24,000
Speaker 2: building and having. And sometimes I just be like, oh

614
00:36:24,040 --> 00:36:25,680
Speaker 2: my god, i live in a house full of dudes.

615
00:36:25,719 --> 00:36:29,160
Speaker 2: I'm the only girls because we have three three three boys,

616
00:36:29,400 --> 00:36:31,840
Speaker 2: and I live in a house full of clingy, touchy

617
00:36:33,160 --> 00:36:37,520
Speaker 2: Every five seconds, somebody gotta be in my space. And

618
00:36:37,640 --> 00:36:40,200
Speaker 2: then you look around and everybody in the house has

619
00:36:40,200 --> 00:36:43,920
Speaker 2: been inside your body. Everybody listen in or out, you know.

620
00:36:44,080 --> 00:36:49,239
Speaker 2: And so I'm like, Jesus, give me a break, give

621
00:36:49,280 --> 00:36:53,279
Speaker 2: me a break. And you know, my mom, I'll say

622
00:36:53,320 --> 00:36:55,880
Speaker 2: little things to her like, oh girl, this is she

623
00:36:56,080 --> 00:36:58,600
Speaker 2: like Jennifer, it is worse problems to have.

624
00:36:59,120 --> 00:37:03,920
Speaker 1: Let let me tell you if your biggest complaint with Tavares.

625
00:37:03,480 --> 00:37:05,880
Speaker 2: Right now is that every time he go to the store,

626
00:37:05,880 --> 00:37:08,239
Speaker 2: he got to call you twenty times to say the

627
00:37:08,320 --> 00:37:12,320
Speaker 2: same thing that if that's your only problem you women,

628
00:37:13,080 --> 00:37:20,799
Speaker 2: then take it the me online. It's always a thing

629
00:37:20,840 --> 00:37:24,960
Speaker 2: about women being submissive and blah blah blah blah blah. Yeah,

630
00:37:25,000 --> 00:37:28,920
Speaker 2: how do you and your spouse like navigate decision making

631
00:37:29,120 --> 00:37:30,120
Speaker 2: and your relationship?

632
00:37:32,640 --> 00:37:36,040
Speaker 1: So each one of us is good at different things.

633
00:37:35,280 --> 00:37:40,080
Speaker 2: And we have always allowed whoever has the strength to

634
00:37:40,200 --> 00:37:43,640
Speaker 2: make to make the decision. So my husband is really

635
00:37:43,719 --> 00:37:47,160
Speaker 2: good with keeping up keeping up with things like making

636
00:37:47,239 --> 00:37:51,160
Speaker 2: everybody's doctor's appointments and Dennis appointments and figuring out where

637
00:37:52,440 --> 00:37:56,719
Speaker 2: we should go and do in certain certain things. But

638
00:37:56,840 --> 00:38:00,120
Speaker 2: his strong suit is not remembering when somebody has a

639
00:38:00,200 --> 00:38:03,680
Speaker 2: project due at school, or when the parent teacher conference

640
00:38:03,840 --> 00:38:07,480
Speaker 2: is when the follow up, or the kids we're volunteering

641
00:38:07,480 --> 00:38:09,399
Speaker 2: for the Valentine party, well they need back.

642
00:38:09,680 --> 00:38:13,799
Speaker 1: That's that's not as strong point. So what whatever you're

643
00:38:13,880 --> 00:38:17,520
Speaker 1: good at, that's what you take the point on, because

644
00:38:17,680 --> 00:38:20,759
Speaker 1: we look at it like these kids don't care who

645
00:38:20,840 --> 00:38:26,000
Speaker 1: do what. The light company don't care who who pay it,

646
00:38:26,120 --> 00:38:29,600
Speaker 1: as long as it's as long as it's paid. Money

647
00:38:29,640 --> 00:38:31,520
Speaker 1: has been one of those things in our relationship.

648
00:38:31,520 --> 00:38:36,279
Speaker 2: That's never been an issue because when we didn't have it,

649
00:38:36,400 --> 00:38:38,480
Speaker 2: we figured it out, and now that we do have

650
00:38:38,520 --> 00:38:40,920
Speaker 2: it is the same. It's we need, we pay what

651
00:38:41,040 --> 00:38:43,080
Speaker 2: needs to be paid, and we keep it pushing from there.

652
00:38:45,080 --> 00:38:48,239
Speaker 2: I think the whole debate on you know, I'm not

653
00:38:48,280 --> 00:38:51,680
Speaker 2: going fifty to fifty with no men own no bills.

654
00:38:52,239 --> 00:38:54,720
Speaker 2: We have a joint account, so all the money going

655
00:38:54,760 --> 00:38:57,800
Speaker 2: into the account and we and I'm paying the bills,

656
00:38:57,880 --> 00:38:58,880
Speaker 2: he's paying the bills.

657
00:38:58,960 --> 00:39:00,719
Speaker 1: I mean it, I don't.

658
00:39:00,719 --> 00:39:02,840
Speaker 2: You ain't got no little account on the side. You know,

659
00:39:03,400 --> 00:39:11,200
Speaker 2: I have a big account on the right girl, and

660
00:39:11,200 --> 00:39:15,799
Speaker 2: and and he knows that. And so you know, I

661
00:39:15,960 --> 00:39:18,719
Speaker 2: work a full time job and I run my business

662
00:39:18,920 --> 00:39:23,520
Speaker 2: full time, and so my husband is a data analyst,

663
00:39:24,239 --> 00:39:28,120
Speaker 2: so he he makes more than I than I do.

664
00:39:28,480 --> 00:39:30,359
Speaker 2: So the way that we the way that we do

665
00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:34,080
Speaker 2: our funds is that all the money goes into one

666
00:39:34,120 --> 00:39:37,040
Speaker 2: account from our job. So all the money goes into

667
00:39:37,080 --> 00:39:40,640
Speaker 2: one account, We pay all all of the bills, whatever

668
00:39:40,760 --> 00:39:43,520
Speaker 2: is left over half goes into savings, and then we

669
00:39:43,600 --> 00:39:45,719
Speaker 2: split the other half for you to be able to

670
00:39:45,760 --> 00:39:47,800
Speaker 2: do whatever it is that you want to do. It

671
00:39:48,560 --> 00:39:54,439
Speaker 2: I manage my business money on my own. And it's

672
00:39:54,480 --> 00:39:56,400
Speaker 2: not that it's it's mine.

673
00:39:56,800 --> 00:40:01,279
Speaker 1: It's just that my husband knows. If he sees it,

674
00:40:01,440 --> 00:40:03,680
Speaker 1: he gonna be like, well, we could do or what

675
00:40:03,760 --> 00:40:04,319
Speaker 1: if we did?

676
00:40:04,960 --> 00:40:07,640
Speaker 2: And I'm and so we once we recognized that that

677
00:40:07,840 --> 00:40:09,600
Speaker 2: was the thing, he's like, I don't even want to

678
00:40:09,640 --> 00:40:13,000
Speaker 2: have access to it because then when something happens and

679
00:40:13,080 --> 00:40:16,360
Speaker 2: he's like, man, we we got to spend four thousand

680
00:40:16,440 --> 00:40:19,680
Speaker 2: dollars on XYZ, I'm like, all right, bet it. I

681
00:40:19,719 --> 00:40:24,279
Speaker 2: got it because I'm the saver. And since we know

682
00:40:24,360 --> 00:40:28,000
Speaker 2: that's our strong strong point, is what then I handle

683
00:40:28,080 --> 00:40:31,279
Speaker 2: the money. If I wasn't the saver and I and

684
00:40:31,400 --> 00:40:34,240
Speaker 2: he was, then he would handle it and I wouldn't

685
00:40:34,239 --> 00:40:37,360
Speaker 2: look at it like he's giving me an allowance. No,

686
00:40:37,840 --> 00:40:43,279
Speaker 2: we have to keep living beyond our immediate needs. And

687
00:40:43,320 --> 00:40:47,520
Speaker 2: so because we recognize that it's whoever has, whoever strong

688
00:40:47,600 --> 00:40:50,200
Speaker 2: gets at whatever it is, that's who does what.

689
00:40:51,400 --> 00:40:55,000
Speaker 1: I hate washing clothes. I don't want to touch nobody's dirty.

690
00:40:54,760 --> 00:40:59,160
Speaker 2: Ass, drawing I can imagine, I don't want to turn

691
00:40:59,280 --> 00:41:02,360
Speaker 2: your fock and they take their socks off and everything

692
00:41:02,440 --> 00:41:05,960
Speaker 2: is inside out, like I don't. And my husband I

693
00:41:06,040 --> 00:41:09,880
Speaker 2: have to, like, don't wash the clothes inside out like

694
00:41:09,920 --> 00:41:12,920
Speaker 2: he will just put it in there. But at this

695
00:41:12,960 --> 00:41:16,880
Speaker 2: point I'm like, whatever, I don't like washing clothes and

696
00:41:16,920 --> 00:41:19,600
Speaker 2: he doesn't like folding clothes. So instead of it being

697
00:41:19,640 --> 00:41:22,480
Speaker 2: this power struggle of who needs to do what, he

698
00:41:22,680 --> 00:41:27,120
Speaker 2: washes the clothes, I fold the clothes up. Everybody put

699
00:41:27,160 --> 00:41:29,640
Speaker 2: their stuff up. Instead of it being this, well, you

700
00:41:29,719 --> 00:41:31,239
Speaker 2: the woman, you need to do.

701
00:41:31,719 --> 00:41:33,040
Speaker 1: We don't have gender roles.

702
00:41:33,120 --> 00:41:36,040
Speaker 2: Of course, you know, it's certain things that people gravitate towards.

703
00:41:36,960 --> 00:41:41,120
Speaker 2: He makes sure the car has gas, like stuff dealing,

704
00:41:41,560 --> 00:41:43,640
Speaker 2: that's not my strong point. He makes sure the lawn

705
00:41:43,920 --> 00:41:49,920
Speaker 2: the law and man come. But listen, listen, he be

706
00:41:49,960 --> 00:41:52,239
Speaker 2: ready to he is social living. I'm like, boy, you

707
00:41:52,280 --> 00:41:53,920
Speaker 2: I ain't never seen you've fiping by your life. But

708
00:41:53,960 --> 00:41:58,520
Speaker 2: the fact that you be so ready, I believe it.

709
00:41:59,760 --> 00:42:00,640
Speaker 1: I believe it.

710
00:42:00,719 --> 00:42:03,600
Speaker 2: I believe it with my whole heart. I believe it.

711
00:42:03,840 --> 00:42:06,439
Speaker 2: I bet you would. I bet and and and that's

712
00:42:06,480 --> 00:42:09,279
Speaker 2: all I need because I ain't never gonna let you

713
00:42:09,320 --> 00:42:11,839
Speaker 2: fight nobody. But I just I just didn't know that

714
00:42:11,880 --> 00:42:14,239
Speaker 2: you will when the time comes. With the time, got

715
00:42:14,239 --> 00:42:16,200
Speaker 2: that dog getting you to go ahead and come out

716
00:42:16,239 --> 00:42:20,080
Speaker 2: through I can appreciate that. Girl. Listen, I had a

717
00:42:20,080 --> 00:42:24,879
Speaker 2: million questions, but you answer all of them, answer every

718
00:42:24,960 --> 00:42:27,080
Speaker 2: last one of them. And I was about to ask

719
00:42:27,160 --> 00:42:30,000
Speaker 2: because then another thing, like how do you guys handle disagreements?

720
00:42:30,080 --> 00:42:32,279
Speaker 2: Just different things that come up in a marriage that

721
00:42:32,360 --> 00:42:35,200
Speaker 2: people who haven't been married, they think they're gonna do

722
00:42:35,280 --> 00:42:38,120
Speaker 2: something one way. You know, I can get some advice

723
00:42:38,160 --> 00:42:40,080
Speaker 2: from you because you've been married for thirteen years now.

724
00:42:40,080 --> 00:42:43,320
Speaker 2: So how do you guys handle Yeah, disagreements in a marriage.

725
00:42:43,360 --> 00:42:45,919
Speaker 2: So my husband is a he wants to talk about

726
00:42:45,960 --> 00:42:49,360
Speaker 2: it right now type of person, and I am not.

727
00:42:49,840 --> 00:42:52,359
Speaker 2: I need a I need a minute. And so we

728
00:42:52,480 --> 00:42:57,440
Speaker 2: had to learn that it's okay that I need a minute,

729
00:42:57,520 --> 00:43:00,279
Speaker 2: but I have to also be respectful of the fact

730
00:43:00,280 --> 00:43:03,839
Speaker 2: that I can't let that drag out for the day.

731
00:43:04,480 --> 00:43:07,680
Speaker 2: And so it's like we set these boundaries up. You

732
00:43:07,760 --> 00:43:11,120
Speaker 2: get an hour to cool down because he it's burning

733
00:43:11,200 --> 00:43:13,040
Speaker 2: him up to not be able to talk about it

734
00:43:13,200 --> 00:43:16,880
Speaker 2: right right then and there, and I'm I'm more coming

735
00:43:16,920 --> 00:43:19,560
Speaker 2: down there he going up yeah, right, And so for

736
00:43:20,160 --> 00:43:23,000
Speaker 2: it's a lot of things that may happen that he'll

737
00:43:23,120 --> 00:43:27,000
Speaker 2: he'll he'll say, you are too nonchalant about things, and

738
00:43:27,040 --> 00:43:28,960
Speaker 2: it's not And I have to remind him it's not

739
00:43:29,000 --> 00:43:31,239
Speaker 2: that I'm nonchalant about It's not that I don't care.

740
00:43:31,640 --> 00:43:33,800
Speaker 1: It's just that I.

741
00:43:33,600 --> 00:43:37,840
Speaker 2: Know that in twenty minutes, none of this is about

742
00:43:37,840 --> 00:43:41,200
Speaker 2: to be relevant. So because I know it's not gonna

743
00:43:41,200 --> 00:43:44,000
Speaker 2: be relevant, I'm not gonna let myself get that worked

744
00:43:44,080 --> 00:43:48,719
Speaker 2: up because why and the stuff that we're going back

745
00:43:48,800 --> 00:43:51,840
Speaker 2: and forth about isn't like, oh, who is this woman

746
00:43:51,920 --> 00:43:54,479
Speaker 2: or who is this and that. It's like white didn't

747
00:43:54,480 --> 00:43:57,520
Speaker 2: put a trash bag inside the trash can, or I

748
00:43:57,560 --> 00:44:00,200
Speaker 2: thought you said that you was gonna take this out.

749
00:44:00,520 --> 00:44:02,040
Speaker 1: You know, just little things.

750
00:44:02,080 --> 00:44:06,520
Speaker 2: But our biggest thing has always been to keep it respectful.

751
00:44:07,120 --> 00:44:10,880
Speaker 1: There is no name calling and you this and.

752
00:44:10,760 --> 00:44:16,200
Speaker 2: That and degrading and being the being the meaning to

753
00:44:16,280 --> 00:44:20,319
Speaker 2: the other person to get your point across. And we

754
00:44:20,400 --> 00:44:23,200
Speaker 2: often have this like little thing like if you got

755
00:44:23,239 --> 00:44:25,640
Speaker 2: mad at your boss, you wouldn't go to them and

756
00:44:25,680 --> 00:44:27,400
Speaker 2: cuss them out and talk to them all kind of

757
00:44:27,400 --> 00:44:30,680
Speaker 2: crazy or you're a coworker, because you would fear that

758
00:44:30,760 --> 00:44:34,160
Speaker 2: you would lose your livelihood. But people will talk to

759
00:44:34,200 --> 00:44:38,560
Speaker 2: their spouses like trash And it's like how can you

760
00:44:38,560 --> 00:44:40,520
Speaker 2: give a stranger more respect.

761
00:44:40,080 --> 00:44:44,080
Speaker 1: Than you give your significant other? And we adopted that

762
00:44:44,200 --> 00:44:46,600
Speaker 1: model a long time ago, like talk to me and

763
00:44:46,719 --> 00:44:50,479
Speaker 1: talk to me like your coworker, talk to me nice,

764
00:44:50,600 --> 00:44:51,960
Speaker 1: or don't talk to me at all.

765
00:44:52,880 --> 00:44:57,800
Speaker 2: And sometimes like if it's like a heated thing, especially

766
00:44:57,800 --> 00:44:58,680
Speaker 2: because because.

767
00:44:58,400 --> 00:45:01,640
Speaker 1: We have kids, we'll text like.

768
00:45:04,400 --> 00:45:08,600
Speaker 2: Because you thought you was about uh or so because

769
00:45:08,960 --> 00:45:13,040
Speaker 2: we don't ever want to create this environment for them.

770
00:45:13,160 --> 00:45:16,560
Speaker 2: You know, where they living with their parents, going back

771
00:45:16,600 --> 00:45:18,879
Speaker 2: and forth, and that's the sort of thing. I never

772
00:45:18,920 --> 00:45:21,239
Speaker 2: want to give my children a childhood that they have

773
00:45:21,360 --> 00:45:27,399
Speaker 2: to recover from, like be fun loving black boys who

774
00:45:27,760 --> 00:45:31,319
Speaker 2: just your kids are either gonna want a marriage just

775
00:45:31,560 --> 00:45:35,120
Speaker 2: like yours or nothing like yours, right, those those are

776
00:45:35,120 --> 00:45:36,799
Speaker 2: the only two options they're gonna be. Like, I ain't

777
00:45:36,800 --> 00:45:39,240
Speaker 2: never seen my mama and daddy fight. Meanwhile, y'all texting

778
00:45:39,320 --> 00:45:44,440
Speaker 2: like yeah, nigga, baby, your bowing mama, Like I'm on,

779
00:45:44,640 --> 00:45:50,440
Speaker 2: I'm on y'all relationships sometimes you know what I'm saying

780
00:45:50,440 --> 00:45:53,040
Speaker 2: because verbally, you fuck are to say something real nasty,

781
00:45:53,280 --> 00:45:56,520
Speaker 2: be a partner. Yes, yes, it's a little bit different

782
00:45:56,560 --> 00:46:00,520
Speaker 2: than that. You don't mean it, yeah, And you don't

783
00:46:00,560 --> 00:46:02,920
Speaker 2: mean it because because my text, because your text are

784
00:46:02,920 --> 00:46:06,560
Speaker 2: auto correct, you're trying to cuss and it's like duck.

785
00:46:06,640 --> 00:46:08,880
Speaker 2: It's like I wasn't trying to say duck. Like I

786
00:46:08,920 --> 00:46:11,239
Speaker 2: don't even what I was trying to say. But it

787
00:46:11,880 --> 00:46:17,680
Speaker 2: definitely helps to going back to the security piece of things,

788
00:46:18,280 --> 00:46:22,440
Speaker 2: I don't let too much get to me because I'm like, dude,

789
00:46:23,120 --> 00:46:26,439
Speaker 2: you I know this is not gonna be a big deal.

790
00:46:26,640 --> 00:46:28,759
Speaker 2: And because i know it's not gonna be a big deal,

791
00:46:28,840 --> 00:46:32,000
Speaker 2: I'm not even gonna get ready to get all that

792
00:46:31,640 --> 00:46:36,920
Speaker 2: work worked up. Our biggest argument always across the board

793
00:46:37,200 --> 00:46:38,800
Speaker 2: is and I wouldn't even call it an argument, but

794
00:46:38,840 --> 00:46:40,759
Speaker 2: the biggest thing to go back and forth is my

795
00:46:40,840 --> 00:46:43,440
Speaker 2: husband thinks that we're supposed to have sex like forty

796
00:46:43,480 --> 00:46:47,800
Speaker 2: five thousand times a day.

797
00:46:47,239 --> 00:46:50,160
Speaker 1: And he thinks that other people.

798
00:46:50,680 --> 00:46:54,040
Speaker 2: He's like, I'm sure we're the only married people that's

799
00:46:54,080 --> 00:46:57,200
Speaker 2: having sex like four times a week. That's not I'm like,

800
00:46:58,800 --> 00:47:03,680
Speaker 2: I'm like, I'm like, do you know what, No, I'm like, bro,

801
00:47:03,840 --> 00:47:07,480
Speaker 2: we have like we literally, like clockwork, are gonna have

802
00:47:07,520 --> 00:47:10,680
Speaker 2: sex at least every other day, like at least every

803
00:47:10,760 --> 00:47:11,319
Speaker 2: other day.

804
00:47:11,520 --> 00:47:12,799
Speaker 1: That is going to be a thing.

805
00:47:13,440 --> 00:47:18,120
Speaker 2: And he'll say stuff like people people, I'm I'm I'm

806
00:47:18,160 --> 00:47:21,080
Speaker 2: sure folks out here married they doing you need to

807
00:47:21,280 --> 00:47:24,200
Speaker 2: I'm like, no, that is four times a week was

808
00:47:24,239 --> 00:47:26,839
Speaker 2: a health for time? People even married for thirteen years

809
00:47:26,880 --> 00:47:31,319
Speaker 2: or three kids, that is a lot of sex. Yeah,

810
00:47:31,440 --> 00:47:36,960
Speaker 2: three kids two uh three kids, A business of this

811
00:47:37,239 --> 00:47:41,360
Speaker 2: or that, all of these things, a dog, all this stuff.

812
00:47:41,960 --> 00:47:45,440
Speaker 2: I'm I'm on the pta board, I'm on you know,

813
00:47:45,920 --> 00:47:49,719
Speaker 2: I'm room mom, all these things. I'm like, it is,

814
00:47:51,040 --> 00:47:53,200
Speaker 2: this is healthy and I and it's not that we

815
00:47:53,520 --> 00:47:56,200
Speaker 2: argue about it, but it's like, if it's anything that's

816
00:47:56,239 --> 00:48:02,160
Speaker 2: gonna call some type of friction, if it is bring

817
00:48:02,680 --> 00:48:05,839
Speaker 2: him looking at me and I'm looking like.

818
00:48:08,120 --> 00:48:10,279
Speaker 1: I bend over the time I shoe up.

819
00:48:10,320 --> 00:48:12,279
Speaker 2: And he's like, oh, you're trying to be You're trying

820
00:48:12,320 --> 00:48:17,720
Speaker 2: to be freaky. I'm trying not to fall. I'm trying

821
00:48:17,719 --> 00:48:21,560
Speaker 2: not to trip, like I'm putting anna fall on this

822
00:48:21,560 --> 00:48:25,520
Speaker 2: dick you basically basically you know. And and he's like,

823
00:48:25,640 --> 00:48:27,879
Speaker 2: I'm like, I'm putting all loads like trying to get

824
00:48:27,880 --> 00:48:28,600
Speaker 2: alled up for me.

825
00:48:30,160 --> 00:48:32,080
Speaker 1: I'm trying to preserve my skin.

826
00:48:32,200 --> 00:48:38,200
Speaker 2: Like I don't I'm trying to moisturize myself, but okay,

827
00:48:38,280 --> 00:48:41,880
Speaker 2: and we both work from home, so it just feels

828
00:48:41,920 --> 00:48:42,879
Speaker 2: like it just needs to.

829
00:48:42,840 --> 00:48:46,360
Speaker 1: Be this free for all all the time.

830
00:48:47,280 --> 00:48:51,440
Speaker 2: So that is probably what we But something that I

831
00:48:51,520 --> 00:48:54,160
Speaker 2: do to I will I make it a point to

832
00:48:54,320 --> 00:48:57,400
Speaker 2: like randomly, or it could just be a random Tuesday

833
00:48:58,040 --> 00:49:01,799
Speaker 2: ten o'clock, I'm like, boom, I'm going in here.

834
00:49:02,040 --> 00:49:03,880
Speaker 1: I'm finnam, I'm in here.

835
00:49:03,920 --> 00:49:07,480
Speaker 2: Before I even go in there, I'm Sirritchela going in

836
00:49:07,560 --> 00:49:10,719
Speaker 2: and show out real quick. On the tuesdays, it's going

837
00:49:10,800 --> 00:49:13,640
Speaker 2: up on Tuesday for real. I'm like, come on, and

838
00:49:13,760 --> 00:49:15,000
Speaker 2: that how catch you off? Bar?

839
00:49:15,400 --> 00:49:17,640
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. And you you are here

840
00:49:17,680 --> 00:49:19,759
Speaker 1: thinking you missed a big shot for the rest of

841
00:49:19,800 --> 00:49:20,120
Speaker 1: the day.

842
00:49:20,280 --> 00:49:22,640
Speaker 2: But in my mind, I'm thinking, why go the rest

843
00:49:22,640 --> 00:49:28,320
Speaker 2: of the night to do whatever? To do without without

844
00:49:28,640 --> 00:49:31,120
Speaker 2: without you sitting on the couch, like what to do

845
00:49:31,360 --> 00:49:34,399
Speaker 2: when you jumped out? You funny as hell?

846
00:49:34,560 --> 00:49:35,560
Speaker 1: Time you going to bed.

847
00:49:36,400 --> 00:49:37,560
Speaker 2: That's a good problem to have.

848
00:49:38,280 --> 00:49:41,439
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a good problem to have, So I'll take it.

849
00:49:41,640 --> 00:49:42,279
Speaker 1: I'll take it.

850
00:49:43,480 --> 00:49:46,640
Speaker 2: Do you have any advice for women who are in

851
00:49:46,760 --> 00:49:49,840
Speaker 2: marriages and they don't seem very happy or any advice

852
00:49:49,880 --> 00:49:52,920
Speaker 2: for women who are looking for love or any advice.

853
00:49:53,080 --> 00:49:55,279
Speaker 1: What do you have If you are in.

854
00:49:55,239 --> 00:49:58,280
Speaker 2: A marriage and you are unhappy, First of all, figure

855
00:49:58,280 --> 00:49:59,320
Speaker 2: out why you're unhappy.

856
00:49:59,360 --> 00:50:00,440
Speaker 1: Are you are Are you.

857
00:50:00,480 --> 00:50:05,520
Speaker 2: Unhappy because you are comparing your life to somebody else's.

858
00:50:06,120 --> 00:50:09,560
Speaker 2: Are you unhappy because you want this social media love

859
00:50:10,960 --> 00:50:14,880
Speaker 2: and you're not getting that. I see that with a

860
00:50:15,000 --> 00:50:20,960
Speaker 2: lot of people. Your husband may not be the Instagram husband,

861
00:50:21,680 --> 00:50:25,319
Speaker 2: and that's okay. It doesn't mean he loves you any less,

862
00:50:25,840 --> 00:50:29,880
Speaker 2: and so it's comparison is the thief of joy, and

863
00:50:29,920 --> 00:50:33,640
Speaker 2: I think that that really hurts people. My husband is

864
00:50:33,680 --> 00:50:36,240
Speaker 2: not going If you go to his Instagram, it's probably

865
00:50:36,320 --> 00:50:37,720
Speaker 2: like thirty pitches.

866
00:50:37,800 --> 00:50:40,120
Speaker 1: I'm sure seventeen of them is of me. The other

867
00:50:40,160 --> 00:50:43,200
Speaker 1: ones are the kids. He it ain't nothing on their

868
00:50:43,719 --> 00:50:47,080
Speaker 1: He's not a I'm a post you type of dude.

869
00:50:47,760 --> 00:50:54,560
Speaker 2: And I'm okay with that because in real life, like you,

870
00:50:55,080 --> 00:50:59,120
Speaker 2: you double tapping me in real life, so you know.

871
00:51:00,640 --> 00:51:01,600
Speaker 1: It's okay.

872
00:51:01,920 --> 00:51:03,560
Speaker 2: But I think that a lot of times, in this

873
00:51:03,680 --> 00:51:06,919
Speaker 2: day and age with social media, I'm finding that people

874
00:51:06,960 --> 00:51:09,960
Speaker 2: are unhappy in their relationships because it's not living up

875
00:51:10,000 --> 00:51:14,680
Speaker 2: to this sixty second real that's being put up with

876
00:51:14,719 --> 00:51:18,160
Speaker 2: your husband showing up with flowers and doing this, and

877
00:51:18,200 --> 00:51:21,680
Speaker 2: doing and doing that. But the things that he is

878
00:51:21,800 --> 00:51:25,000
Speaker 2: doing for you, you know, could be.

879
00:51:24,960 --> 00:51:26,680
Speaker 1: Taking the place of all of that.

880
00:51:26,719 --> 00:51:30,719
Speaker 2: It's just not aesthetically pleasing And so I think that

881
00:51:30,920 --> 00:51:35,759
Speaker 2: focusing on the good and your own relationship is great. Now,

882
00:51:35,760 --> 00:51:37,640
Speaker 2: if you whip be your ass, you needs a niggadvarce.

883
00:51:37,840 --> 00:51:40,200
Speaker 1: Now I ain't ain't.

884
00:51:41,320 --> 00:51:43,479
Speaker 2: Yeah, if he out here knocking you upside your head

885
00:51:43,560 --> 00:51:46,319
Speaker 2: and sleeping with everybody under the sun and doing our

886
00:51:46,960 --> 00:51:48,880
Speaker 2: go ahead and move and move on.

887
00:51:49,040 --> 00:51:51,160
Speaker 1: So it's like, go ahead, but if But to.

888
00:51:51,239 --> 00:51:55,239
Speaker 2: People that are dating, that are wanting to be in

889
00:51:55,280 --> 00:51:58,280
Speaker 2: a relationship and want to be with somebody, my biggest

890
00:51:58,280 --> 00:52:01,319
Speaker 2: piece of advice is that it's that you have of

891
00:52:02,520 --> 00:52:07,280
Speaker 2: He needs to be this tall, make this much money,

892
00:52:07,320 --> 00:52:11,360
Speaker 2: have all these all these things that at any point

893
00:52:11,760 --> 00:52:15,640
Speaker 2: could change. Right, so he has to be this tall.

894
00:52:15,760 --> 00:52:17,840
Speaker 2: What if what if he was that tall and he

895
00:52:17,880 --> 00:52:20,160
Speaker 2: got in a car accident and now he in a wheelchair.

896
00:52:20,280 --> 00:52:22,759
Speaker 2: Now now he's not that tall. What if he had

897
00:52:22,800 --> 00:52:26,359
Speaker 2: this amazing job and then he lost it. Those are

898
00:52:26,360 --> 00:52:27,680
Speaker 2: not character traits.

899
00:52:28,120 --> 00:52:28,759
Speaker 1: Those are not.

900
00:52:28,880 --> 00:52:32,960
Speaker 2: Things that will sustain you in a marriage and I

901
00:52:33,000 --> 00:52:37,440
Speaker 2: think that having people often say like I want a

902
00:52:37,600 --> 00:52:39,640
Speaker 2: good man, I want a good woman.

903
00:52:39,680 --> 00:52:41,840
Speaker 1: Well, what is that actually mean for you?

904
00:52:42,400 --> 00:52:45,000
Speaker 2: Right? What that means for you? And what and what

905
00:52:45,040 --> 00:52:48,240
Speaker 2: that means for me? It's too totally do different things.

906
00:52:48,280 --> 00:52:51,800
Speaker 2: So I think being able to write down like character

907
00:52:51,880 --> 00:52:54,319
Speaker 2: and look at what you write. If you say I

908
00:52:54,360 --> 00:52:56,520
Speaker 2: want a good I want a good man, and then

909
00:52:56,760 --> 00:53:00,400
Speaker 2: you immediately go into he gotta make six feet gears,

910
00:53:00,480 --> 00:53:01,960
Speaker 2: be six foot.

911
00:53:01,760 --> 00:53:06,280
Speaker 1: Five, light skinned, drive this, and that those.

912
00:53:06,080 --> 00:53:10,080
Speaker 2: Are gotta gotta have a dick like Drake drink right, girl?

913
00:53:10,360 --> 00:53:16,640
Speaker 2: I said, ah, I said what I said, girl, did

914
00:53:16,719 --> 00:53:23,080
Speaker 2: you see Drake dick? My husband was like, so, y'all

915
00:53:23,160 --> 00:53:23,839
Speaker 2: just really on.

916
00:53:25,640 --> 00:53:29,000
Speaker 1: And is and I was, and I was I said,

917
00:53:29,040 --> 00:53:30,480
Speaker 1: oh my god, this is a video.

918
00:53:32,320 --> 00:53:34,920
Speaker 2: This was a picture act just in case they take

919
00:53:34,960 --> 00:53:42,200
Speaker 2: it down. That Drake got oh god, you did like

920
00:53:42,480 --> 00:53:43,120
Speaker 2: and yeah, you know.

921
00:53:43,200 --> 00:53:45,360
Speaker 1: And that is something that I do love about my marriage,

922
00:53:45,480 --> 00:53:46,840
Speaker 1: is like he.

923
00:53:46,680 --> 00:53:51,440
Speaker 2: Wasn't insecure by that, insecure or offended that. I mean,

924
00:53:51,719 --> 00:53:54,879
Speaker 2: it's something that's falling around on on social media. If

925
00:53:54,920 --> 00:53:58,080
Speaker 2: somebody said I seen Beyonce sitty, I'm a look, I

926
00:53:58,160 --> 00:54:02,960
Speaker 2: was just like, I'll it's curiosity, you know, and so

927
00:54:03,800 --> 00:54:06,960
Speaker 2: I just yeah, Drake's Drake's Dick definitely has been.

928
00:54:08,000 --> 00:54:10,319
Speaker 1: The donkey of the day for real, like.

929
00:54:16,239 --> 00:54:23,440
Speaker 2: Literally literally literally donkey other day. Yeah, well, let me

930
00:54:23,480 --> 00:54:26,239
Speaker 2: tell you something, missus, Jennifer Allen. This was such a

931
00:54:26,360 --> 00:54:28,920
Speaker 2: great interview. You were a great guest. I want you

932
00:54:29,000 --> 00:54:32,640
Speaker 2: to plug all your things, plug your micro wedding venue

933
00:54:32,719 --> 00:54:35,080
Speaker 2: and all the time. Please. Yeah.

934
00:54:35,120 --> 00:54:38,240
Speaker 1: So, I'm the owner of Jesse Lope.

935
00:54:38,640 --> 00:54:42,240
Speaker 2: I'm a micro wedding plannet expert based here in the Dallas,

936
00:54:42,239 --> 00:54:45,640
Speaker 2: Texas area. I'm on social media at Jesse Lope LLC.

937
00:54:46,200 --> 00:54:48,880
Speaker 2: I have a podcast called the Wedding to Wife Podcast

938
00:54:49,200 --> 00:54:52,120
Speaker 2: where we talk about all things from wedding planning to

939
00:54:52,239 --> 00:54:55,680
Speaker 2: wife life because it is more than just getting that rain,

940
00:54:55,800 --> 00:54:58,759
Speaker 2: and we also want to educate brides on what it

941
00:54:58,840 --> 00:55:02,439
Speaker 2: takes to actually pull off these pinterest worthy weddings. We

942
00:55:02,480 --> 00:55:08,440
Speaker 2: talk about bridesmaids, disaster stories, and people that have called

943
00:55:08,440 --> 00:55:13,160
Speaker 2: off weddings, called off in engagements. And season two launches

944
00:55:13,239 --> 00:55:17,480
Speaker 2: next month and I'm super super excited about that. But yeah,

945
00:55:17,520 --> 00:55:20,120
Speaker 2: so that's the Wedding to Life podcast and my personal

946
00:55:20,160 --> 00:55:24,200
Speaker 2: social media is I add thank you nobody, thank you girl.

947
00:55:24,280 --> 00:55:28,720
Speaker 2: I'm listening hands too. I am thank you. I'm getting

948
00:55:28,719 --> 00:55:33,440
Speaker 2: engaged next year to Drake, so we probably ye come

949
00:55:33,520 --> 00:55:34,640
Speaker 2: home my mom.

950
00:55:35,280 --> 00:55:37,120
Speaker 1: I won't even look at him, no type of way.

951
00:55:37,400 --> 00:55:46,879
Speaker 2: Everybody's young man, but everybody thanks everything. Oh the way

952
00:55:47,120 --> 00:55:50,359
Speaker 2: she was like, y'all, she said, look at our man,

953
00:55:52,760 --> 00:55:58,839
Speaker 2: good our husband. I was like, I s relieved for

954
00:55:58,880 --> 00:56:04,920
Speaker 2: some reason, like not you know, yeah, yeah, y'all have it.

955
00:56:05,080 --> 00:56:07,120
Speaker 1: You're right. I appreciate y'all having me on you do.

956
00:56:07,760 --> 00:56:11,600
Speaker 2: Thank you so much Jennifer for joining We Talk Bat. Y'all.

957
00:56:11,600 --> 00:56:14,440
Speaker 2: If you enjoyed this episode, y'all tune in every Thursday

958
00:56:14,520 --> 00:56:16,759
Speaker 2: on your heart radio app and wherever the fuck you

959
00:56:16,800 --> 00:56:19,680
Speaker 2: get your podcast at. This is your co host AJ

960
00:56:20,000 --> 00:56:25,239
Speaker 2: Holiday two point zero on instagrams Kick a Tail y'all

961
00:56:25,239 --> 00:56:27,799
Speaker 2: its official team on Instagram. Y'all follow me and if

962
00:56:27,880 --> 00:56:30,480
Speaker 2: y'all enjoyed this episode, I really enjoyed this episode. It

963
00:56:30,520 --> 00:56:32,840
Speaker 2: makes me so hopeful and I'm just like a hopeless

964
00:56:32,920 --> 00:56:35,239
Speaker 2: romantic and I know some of you all are. So

965
00:56:35,280 --> 00:56:37,319
Speaker 2: if you enjoy this, come back next week for a

966
00:56:37,360 --> 00:56:41,080
Speaker 2: part two. We're gonna have another happy wife on y'all.

967
00:56:41,120 --> 00:56:45,000
Speaker 2: Remember speak now and never hold your peace or meet

968
00:56:45,080 --> 00:56:51,280
Speaker 2: like Drake, have a good day. Stop talking about my husband. Okay, bye, y'all.

969
00:56:51,920 --> 00:56:55,840
Speaker 1: We Talk Back podcast is a production of iHeartRadio. Visit

970
00:56:55,880 --> 00:56:59,680
Speaker 1: the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to

971
00:56:59,680 --> 00:57:00,439
Speaker 1: your face a show