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Speaker 1: Hey, the folks, it is Friday, March thirteenth, and finally

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Speaker 1: someone has figured out the key to fixing the Internet

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Speaker 1: and making social media a nice place to be. Who

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Speaker 1: has figured this out Doja Cat, And we should all

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Speaker 1: be listening with that. Welcome to this episode of Amy

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Speaker 1: and TJ Robe. This was not on our list of

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Speaker 1: possible episodes we'd be doing on a Friday afternoon, but

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Speaker 1: Doja Cat has just touched our hearts.

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Speaker 2: She has because look, we.

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Speaker 3: All know all the hate, all the comments, all the

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Speaker 3: negative things about social media, and we also know, just

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Speaker 3: from politics and life and social circles that when somebody

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Speaker 3: does something maybe they shouldn't have, or talked smack about

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Speaker 3: somebody they shouldn't have. How often do you see somebody

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Speaker 3: own it or recognize why they did it or that

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Speaker 3: they shouldn't have done it. I would say almost never,

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Speaker 3: and especially online.

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Speaker 1: Especially online robes, It's almost impossible. And you mentioned it

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Speaker 1: in Rogue. We just saw it recently, and fine, yes

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Speaker 1: it was Christine Olman that I remember her from that hearing.

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Speaker 1: I gave every opportunity just to say, hey, Alex pretty

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Speaker 1: wasn't a terrorist. You just had bad information gave you

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Speaker 1: somebody every opportunity to your point that this is not

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Speaker 1: what this episode is about, but you mentioned it, and

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Speaker 1: as the first thing came to mind, that people can

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Speaker 1: be so stubborn and stand by something they've said publicly

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Speaker 1: that they won't take it back. Robes doja cat. I

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Speaker 1: didn't see this coming. But Timothy shalo May was an

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Speaker 1: easy target for a little while, right he said what

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Speaker 1: he said said. People know that story by now, but

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Speaker 1: a lot of people jumped on. He was an easy target.

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Speaker 1: This is a guy who has not screwed up a

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Speaker 1: whole lot. You can really attack him. But folks finally

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Speaker 1: saw an opening. This is an opportunity to go after him,

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Speaker 1: and I can be standing up for the arts as

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Speaker 1: I'm doing it. A lot of people took that opportunity.

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Speaker 3: Yes, the Golden Boy, the Oscar Award winning actor who's

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Speaker 3: also nominated again at a young age, just through shade

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Speaker 3: at Ballet and Opera.

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Speaker 4: Ah, I've got him now.

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Speaker 3: Now I could be on the morally superior high ground, yes,

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Speaker 3: and join the masses and feeling better about myself than

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Speaker 3: Timothy Shallowey.

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Speaker 1: And look, some of that stuff legitimate hurt, and that's fine,

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Speaker 1: but we know robes. Overwhelmingly, there were a lot of

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Speaker 1: people defending the arts who have never set foot in

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Speaker 1: an opera or a ballet or can name a single

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Speaker 1: ballet dancer or a single or opera performer. Fine, and

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Speaker 1: that's okay. But among those people robes was Doja Cat, who,

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Speaker 1: just like a lot of other folks, she was a

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Speaker 1: high profile one that came out and dumped on Timothy

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Speaker 1: Chalomey for what he said. And she might have been legit,

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Speaker 1: and some of the criticism I believe was legitimate, but

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Speaker 1: she came out pretty hard after she.

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Speaker 3: Did come out hard after him. But what was so

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Speaker 3: freaking cool? No one called her out for it. No

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Speaker 3: one said who were you to say something about Timothy

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Speaker 3: Chalomey or questioned her like I wouldn't have known whether

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Speaker 3: or not Doja Cat has been to the opera or

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Speaker 3: been to the ballet, or been trained in any way.

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Speaker 2: She's a dancer, she's a performer.

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Speaker 3: My best guess would have been that she had some

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Speaker 3: training and she had some standing or at least some

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Speaker 3: platform to be able to be upset by what Timothy

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Speaker 3: Chalamey said. So it wasn't as if she was pinned

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Speaker 3: up against a wall or pushed into a corner or

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Speaker 3: questioned as to why she said what she said, and

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Speaker 3: still she decided to come clean.

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Speaker 1: She came clean, But first what she said. In the

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Speaker 1: first place, she was in a towel. I think her head,

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Speaker 1: her hair was wrapped or something. But she was I mean,

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Speaker 1: clearly it wasn't a well planned or thought out necessarily

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Speaker 1: like she did it off the cuff. But she put

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Speaker 1: out a video on her social media in which she

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Speaker 1: was criticizing him. She was making fun of his name

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Speaker 1: to a certain degree, mispronouncing it and calling him out

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Speaker 1: for the comments and saying it's ballet is beautiful, it's

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Speaker 1: been around for so long, and was a defender of

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Speaker 1: the ballet like so many other people. I didn't think

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Speaker 1: her initial message was not necessarily notable other than the

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Speaker 1: fact it was a famous person criticizing him.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, she was being sarcastic.

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Speaker 3: She called him timote Chalammet. She said had the nerve,

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Speaker 3: big guy, by the way, So she made fun of

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Speaker 3: his size. I mean, she did take some liberties to

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Speaker 3: poke some fun at him and said that he had

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Speaker 3: the audacity the nerve to talk about opera and ballet,

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Speaker 3: and she talked about the respect it deserve, that opera

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Speaker 3: was four hundred years old, that ballet was five hundred

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Speaker 3: years old. She talked about if you walked into an

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Speaker 3: opera house today, it would be packed and silent out

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Speaker 3: of respect that people show up and they bleed every

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Speaker 3: single day, that people care, that people give an f

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Speaker 3: So she definitely went fairly hard on him in her comments, and.

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Speaker 1: Again, I don't Again, I didn't necessarily find it notable

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Speaker 1: other than the fact that she's a notable person.

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Speaker 2: Sure, of course, a lot of.

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Speaker 1: People have criticized him. A lot of it was deserved.

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Speaker 1: Some of them went too far, but fine, that's not

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Speaker 1: the case. But even before anybody could necessarily call her

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Speaker 1: out and nobody was or her comments, she posts another

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Speaker 1: video and in this other video robes she hits, I

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Speaker 1: swear to you, this is the best synopsis. This is

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Speaker 1: the best explanation just this is the best seminar. This

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Speaker 1: is the best speech. This is the best solution I

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Speaker 1: have ever seen to how we should start to proceed

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Speaker 1: and check ourselves on social media. She essentially called herself

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Speaker 1: out for her previous social media behavior.

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Speaker 3: Yes, and I think you can take what she says,

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Speaker 3: And I'm telling you This was one of the most hopeful,

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Speaker 3: incredible things I have heard in a long time. And

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Speaker 3: we could apply it to social media, but I would

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Speaker 3: beg to expand it beyond that. You could apply this

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Speaker 3: to every situation in your life, at work, at home

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Speaker 3: with your family, period.

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Speaker 1: She nails it, and what she nails here, folks, is

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Speaker 1: what she's essentially apologetic. She's essentially saying she's calling herself

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Speaker 1: out for jump on the bandwagon, jumping on a guy

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Speaker 1: because she felt this is what everybody else is doing.

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Speaker 1: This is going to get me attention, This is going

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Speaker 1: to get me likes, that's going to get me a

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Speaker 1: part of the group. Roach, this is These are things

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Speaker 1: we talk about all the time that no one will

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Speaker 1: call themselves out on and check their own.

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Speaker 3: Behavior, and when someone else calls them out on it,

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Speaker 3: they'll deny, deny and defend and deflect.

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Speaker 1: We can't say it enough, folks, and we're gonna let

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Speaker 1: you hear it now and we'll go through it. It's

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Speaker 1: several minutes long here, about four minutes, but this is

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Speaker 1: doja cat. We want you to hear it for yourself.

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Speaker 1: But this is her We'll stop throughout as she says

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Speaker 1: a couple of notable things, but here she is. This

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Speaker 1: is the follow up video after she criticized Timothy Chlamy.

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Speaker 2: I've never been to a ballet.

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Speaker 5: I've never seen an opera, and I took it upon

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Speaker 5: myself yesterday to kind of give it to the man

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Speaker 5: because as there is like a culture based around like

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Speaker 5: outrage and things like that, and people want to feel

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Speaker 5: like they're part of something. It's like a need to connect.

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Speaker 2: Whether good or bad.

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Speaker 5: And what happened yesterday is I watched this TikTok of

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Speaker 5: this guy who is well versed clearly in opera, theater

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Speaker 5: and things like that. He like fires off a million

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Speaker 5: facts about it and how what Timothy said was it

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Speaker 5: was like it was poorly put, but he was being

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Speaker 5: candid and if anything, he knows a lot more than

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Speaker 5: I do personally about these things. And this guy was like,

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Speaker 5: as much as he said that poorly, it's it's kind

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Speaker 5: of like it's true like opera and ballet are really

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Speaker 5: old art form and that it is a dying industry.

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Speaker 5: That guy seemed to know a lot more than I do,

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Speaker 5: so I disagree with him, But what I was doing

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Speaker 5: yesterday was virtue signaling because I wanted to connect and

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Speaker 5: I knew that. I knew that Timothy's goof up was

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Speaker 5: something that I could leverage in order for people to

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Speaker 5: connect with me and fuck with me?

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Speaker 3: What mean?

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Speaker 1: What like mic drop that Robes the video and watching her,

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Speaker 1: she didn't look like this was that well planned and scripted.

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Speaker 1: She nailed everything.

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Speaker 2: She's being real.

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Speaker 3: Oh, she being so honest and so real and so

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Speaker 3: vulnerable and just admitting something that maybe most people would

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Speaker 3: only write to their diary or journal about but never

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Speaker 3: speak out loud, and certainly not put on Instagram for

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Speaker 3: all to see.

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Speaker 2: That's remarkable.

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Speaker 1: She's admitting that she pounced on somebody because she needed something. Robes,

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Speaker 1: you are the one that said it after you've listened

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Speaker 1: to it for the first time. You yeah, you just

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Speaker 1: walked a few minutes ago, he said. She sounds like

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Speaker 1: someone who's been to counseling. She sounds like someone who's

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Speaker 1: been to it, who is going through the process. Some

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Speaker 1: of us have of figuring some of this iss out.

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Speaker 2: It rang true for me. Look, I have been open

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Speaker 2: about it.

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Speaker 3: I am I have been in therapy and I am

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Speaker 3: currently in therapy. And part of this is about understanding

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Speaker 3: and not blaming other people for how we feel, but

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Speaker 3: understanding why we have a reaction and why we do

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Speaker 3: what we do. And sometimes it's ugly and it's embarrassing

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Speaker 3: and it's not something to be proud of, and yet

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Speaker 3: saying it out loud helps so many other people recognize

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Speaker 3: that we all do it.

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Speaker 1: And for her the next day, after such a high

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Speaker 1: profile takedown of such a high profile do to come

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Speaker 1: right back and say I messed up the next day,

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Speaker 1: we appreciate, she continues here, And it's easy.

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Speaker 5: It's like it's just it's a modern way to garner clicks, likes, approval,

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Speaker 5: and all kinds of things like that from people.

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Speaker 2: And so I did that yesterday.

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Speaker 5: And I didn't really think about why I was doing it.

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Speaker 5: I think that for the last couple of days of

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Speaker 5: been acting on impulse anyway, because I just love to

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Speaker 5: be fucking goofy, and I was. I did like thirty

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Speaker 5: tiktoks of like the same bit whatever, and that was

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Speaker 5: fun and I love doing that and I wish I

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Speaker 5: could do that more.

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Speaker 4: But I hurt my neck doing it.

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Speaker 5: But it's like I wanted to be sincere in a moment,

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Speaker 5: and that was the perfect That was the perfect.

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Speaker 2: Material for me too.

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Speaker 5: To seem sincere. But the truth is is, I don't

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Speaker 5: know anything about opera. I don't know anything about ballet,

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Speaker 5: and I've never been to either shows. And I think

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Speaker 5: I just wanted. I think I just wanted to hug.

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Speaker 5: I think that's all that I wanted. I wanted to hug.

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Speaker 5: I wanted to feel like I was part of something

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Speaker 5: bigger than myself. I wanted to be pat on the back,

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Speaker 5: the way everybody else is patting each other on the

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Speaker 5: back in the comment sections ropes.

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Speaker 1: I don't. I don't to your point, that's vulnerable, that

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Speaker 1: is big, and quite frankly, it's encouraging, like, oh wow,

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Speaker 1: it is possible that folks can come around. So I

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Speaker 1: don't know. I know her music and I love her music.

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Speaker 1: I just became a Doja cat fan. I don't know

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Speaker 1: anything about her background necessarily. I just became a Doja

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Speaker 1: cat fan.

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Speaker 2: I just became a massive Doja cat fan.

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Speaker 4: I got, I get. I have listened to this now.

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Speaker 3: I think this might be my fifth time, and every

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Speaker 3: time and she continues beyond this, we'll keep playing it.

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Speaker 2: I get chills.

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Speaker 3: Because as a human being, every person can imagine how

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Speaker 3: hard that would be to admit to your best friend,

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Speaker 3: to admit to the mirror. Now admit it to a

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Speaker 3: camera and post it to your twenty seven million followers.

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Speaker 4: That's significant.

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Speaker 1: We will let you hear, folks, stay here in just

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Speaker 1: a moment, how she wrapped this up. Yes, more powerful words,

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Speaker 1: but she had us laughing a little bit as well.

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Speaker 1: Stay here. I would continue here on this Friday, March

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Speaker 1: thirteenth with Doja Cat our new favorite artist, not because

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Speaker 1: of a single song, but because of a post on

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Speaker 1: social media in which robe she's done something that few

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Speaker 1: people can do, certainly in person and certainly not on

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Speaker 1: social media. Admit a mistake, admit a social media mistake

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Speaker 1: and say she was the small person in that moment

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Speaker 1: and apologize.

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Speaker 3: I'm laughing because I'm trying to imagine any other example,

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Speaker 3: not even recent, but ever, where you have seen someone

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Speaker 3: so willing to be so open, Because usually an apology

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Speaker 3: is my intentions weren't to hurt like that.

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry if anybody.

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Speaker 3: Anybody was offended, but my intentions were only too XYZ.

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Speaker 3: When we hear apologies, when we hear public declarations, it's

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Speaker 3: usually a been forced or B. There's some reason why

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Speaker 3: it's advantageous for that person to say I'm sorry or

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Speaker 3: and it's always almost always coupled with an explanation or

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Speaker 3: a defense.

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Speaker 2: This had none of the above, you.

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Speaker 1: Know what to that's the good point you make about

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Speaker 1: she went beyond She could have just come back and

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Speaker 1: said I'm sorry for what I said. I shouldn't have

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Speaker 1: gone after him and left it at that. She went

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Speaker 1: beyond that and talked about and self reflection is not

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Speaker 1: like you said, it's hard to do imprivate.

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Speaker 4: It's hard to do looking in the mirror. Sometimes I

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Speaker 4: journal right and I'm in therapy.

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Speaker 3: As I pointed out, sometimes it's even hard to journal,

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Speaker 3: like like.

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Speaker 4: Actually admitting the ugliness we all have inside of us.

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Speaker 4: And yes, it might all come from a good place.

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Speaker 2: What do we all want?

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Speaker 3: We want to belong, We want to be liked, to

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Speaker 3: be loved, we want to be the hero.

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Speaker 4: We want to feel like.

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Speaker 3: We're a part of something. And a lot of times

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Speaker 3: we will sacrifice morals, values, what we know is right

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Speaker 3: in order to get those things that make us feel

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Speaker 3: safe and good. And she just outed herself and only

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Speaker 3: explained it. She explained it in such a human way

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Speaker 3: that I dare anyone who listened to her who couldn't.

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Speaker 1: Relate, And this is how she wrapped it up. Take

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Speaker 1: a listen to.

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Speaker 5: This, and I wanted to look like a hero, and

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Speaker 5: that's what happened. And when I got it, I didn't

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Speaker 5: like it so much because I was hearing and educating

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Speaker 5: myself in other ways by listening to other people's take

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Speaker 5: on that subject and on the matter. But I hope

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Speaker 5: this makes things more clear for people. Am I proud

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Speaker 5: of it?

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Speaker 3: Oh?

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Speaker 5: But it just kind of furthers the the fact that

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Speaker 5: sometimes I think shit and then I'm like, never mind,

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Speaker 5: So never mind?

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Speaker 1: You feel seen? Rooms?

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Speaker 2: Wait? You can I feel seen by everything she's saying.

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Speaker 2: I hope all of you need to.

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Speaker 3: But TJ and I have very different ways of communicating,

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Speaker 3: and TJ thinks and it almost unnervingly. So sometimes if

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Speaker 3: I ask him a question, sometimes he'll take a minute

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Speaker 3: before he responds, and it's always so awkward because I

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Speaker 3: often want to fill the silence and he's really truly

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Speaker 3: trying to give me the most honest, logical response. Right

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Speaker 3: when TJ asks me something, I'll just blurt out whatever

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Speaker 3: I think in the moment. And then if you suggest

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Speaker 3: something else. I can be swayed and think, well, maybe

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Speaker 3: that's true too, and then he's.

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Speaker 2: Like, wait, which is it?

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Speaker 3: And then I get all confused and think, I don't know.

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Speaker 3: I was trying to. Well, sometimes I just think stuff

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Speaker 3: and then I think it differently, and then I changed

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Speaker 3: my mind.

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Speaker 4: And you have a hard time understanding that. But when

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Speaker 4: I heard her say that, I felt so validated.

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Speaker 1: Never Mind, I thought that too, you know, even that

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Speaker 1: I thought that was cute.

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Speaker 4: Never mind, Yes, because that's a human thing.

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Speaker 3: We can think something, we can actually convince ourselves we

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Speaker 3: believe something. And then actually, upon further reflection, and I

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Speaker 3: love it as she educated herself, actually went She didn't

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Speaker 3: just say what she said and let it go. She

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Speaker 3: then thought, maybe she should have researched it first and

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Speaker 3: then spoke, But how many of us have done that

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Speaker 3: a million times? So she admits it. Then she went

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Speaker 3: back fine in the opposite order and started to research

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Speaker 3: it and really look into it and really question why

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Speaker 3: she felt the way she felt, And she changed her mind.

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Speaker 3: She recognized that she spoke before she thought about it.

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Speaker 3: She spoke before she educated herself about it. How many

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Speaker 3: of us do that every single day? But how many

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Speaker 3: of us are willing to admit it.

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Speaker 1: What's the line there she said about listening to other

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Speaker 1: people's take on the subject. Yeah right, she was educating

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Speaker 1: herself by listening to other people's take on a subject. Look,

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Speaker 1: there was so much wrapped up into her five minute

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Speaker 1: video that I knows a Grammy way that she's a superstar.

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Speaker 1: She's an artist's a thing. But she has a platform

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Speaker 1: and she just used it for good robes.

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Speaker 3: And honestly, I would say that all those things you

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Speaker 3: just mentioned would make it be even harder for her

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Speaker 3: to admit that she was wrong. If she's looked up

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Speaker 3: to a certain way, she thinks of herself as a

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Speaker 3: certain icon, she's on a pedestal, she's got an audience,

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Speaker 3: it would be even harder to admit that you messed

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Speaker 3: up and that you did it for personal ego driven desire.

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Speaker 3: That's so hard to admit. And she did it, And

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Speaker 3: my god, I am a fan for life.

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Speaker 1: UH don't know. Look, don't know anything about her background,

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Speaker 1: what she's about, what she does, I don't know. But

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Speaker 1: I am judging her based on one thing that I

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Speaker 1: have done a deep dive on, and that is this

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Speaker 1: incident and rogues. I am now going to look into

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Speaker 1: her background for the iyem.

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Speaker 3: We're not going to educate ourselves about.

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Speaker 1: Her and not just take somebody else's word about it.

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Speaker 1: But I want you this is incredible Thoja cat, thank you,

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Speaker 1: and folks, if you get a chance to go back,

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Speaker 1: look it up and listen to it again, it is

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Speaker 1: worth listening to Rabe.

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Speaker 2: I want.

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Speaker 3: I'm glad we got to hear it. I am taking

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Speaker 3: this to heart. I am actually i have learned something

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Speaker 3: from her today. I want I'm sending this to our

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Speaker 3: daughters because this is exactly I mean, everybody needs to

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Speaker 3: hear this, but so many we hear the drama and

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Speaker 3: the constant back and forth, and just to hear this

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Speaker 3: and to hear someone of this stature admit this flaw

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Speaker 3: that is in all of us and acknowledge it and

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Speaker 3: admit it. It opens up the conversation and it also

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Speaker 3: opens the door for all of us to see in

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Speaker 3: ourselves what we do each and every day and how

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Speaker 3: we can acknowledge that and admit it, and how far

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Speaker 3: that will take us to the next level of not

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Speaker 3: throwing shade and judging people before we know all the facts.

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Speaker 1: Those get we thank you, and with that, folks, we

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Speaker 1: always appreciate you spending some time with us. My dear

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Speaker 1: Amy REWOK. I am TJ. Holmes and we will talk

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Speaker 1: to you all soon