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Speaker 1: This is Hi guys, Hi chin, thanks for joining me

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Speaker 1: again this week. Thanks for having me. So I figured

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Speaker 1: we should just talk a little bit about fear. Is

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Speaker 1: fear the unknown? Or is it fear of death? Or

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Speaker 1: is it just anxiety? Do we need to face our fears? Like,

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Speaker 1: I mean, I have a lot of questions involving fear.

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Speaker 1: Do you have a lot of fear? No, I have

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Speaker 1: a lot of anxiety, So I kind of want to

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Speaker 1: clear it up. Am I afraid? Am I fearful? Or

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Speaker 1: am I just like a type a anxious person? Right?

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Speaker 1: And do you are you fearful for your kids? Like?

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Speaker 1: Do you have different fears that surround them? Well, it's

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Speaker 1: not necessarily fear. But like I don't let my kids

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Speaker 1: sleep over other people's houses. Why just because I can't

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Speaker 1: control it? Right this because and you know, you hear

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Speaker 1: stories of things that happened to kids on somber parties,

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Speaker 1: and you know, I may change my mind when they

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Speaker 1: get older. But like when parents asked me, I'm like, no,

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Speaker 1: you're well, your your child's welcome to sleep over my

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Speaker 1: ass and I let them over, you know, Like, and

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Speaker 1: I it's it's not that I it's weird. I never

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Speaker 1: think in my mind, oh, I'm scared that something terrible

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Speaker 1: is going to happen. Necessarily, I don't even let myself

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Speaker 1: go to that place. Right. Just my husband and I

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Speaker 1: are like, no, just bottom line, bottom line note. We

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Speaker 1: don't need to go down the rabbit hole. I don't

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Speaker 1: need to make this parent feel a certain way, but

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Speaker 1: just no. And I don't know if it's partially because

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Speaker 1: um my daughter has some medical things, like she has

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Speaker 1: rheuma toward arthritis, so she has had seizures before, and

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Speaker 1: I know how scary they were for me in the moment,

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Speaker 1: so I don't It's not I don't want to say

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Speaker 1: I don't trust other people, but I don't want to

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Speaker 1: have to put that rust into another parent. Right. You

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Speaker 1: wouldn't be able to sleep. I wouldn't be able to sleep.

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Speaker 1: I would be worried. And I mean, I remember that

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Speaker 1: moment waiting for twelve minutes for the ambulance to come

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Speaker 1: the last time, and I'm like, I don't want another

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Speaker 1: parent that this is. I don't know. I just I

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Speaker 1: go crazy about it. I just can't even say yes.

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Speaker 1: And my daughters at the age where she's starting to

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Speaker 1: want to write, and I'm like no, you're welcome to

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Speaker 1: ask your friends to sleep here, but it's not happening.

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Speaker 1: She's like, Mom, but it's always one side, and I'm like, well,

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Speaker 1: it's to be that way. I mean, I truly think

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Speaker 1: that some of my fears aren't fears, they're just like

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Speaker 1: logical parenting or life life NG I agree, but I

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Speaker 1: also think that I mean, there are a couple of

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Speaker 1: different thoughts that, you know, like fly through my head

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Speaker 1: during the day, worrying about Rocco and I think, you know,

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Speaker 1: and I always think of the worst thing ever, and

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Speaker 1: I try and let it go, like something's going to

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Speaker 1: happen at the school, or there's going to be a fire,

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Speaker 1: and I can't get to the school. What's going to

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Speaker 1: happen to him? And that's a real fear because I

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Speaker 1: can feel the anxiety coming on when I start thinking

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Speaker 1: about it. But I then tell myself, like, that's not

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Speaker 1: going to happen, let it go. But it does happen

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Speaker 1: at least once a day, it does. See that doesn't

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Speaker 1: happen to me. Mine always stem from something so like

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Speaker 1: if my kids go to sleep with a fever, and

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Speaker 1: like I've given them tail and are they've gone to

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Speaker 1: the doctor and they've started antibiotics or whatever it is.

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Speaker 1: I won't sleep because I'll need to go down and

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Speaker 1: check multiple times to make sure that they are doing okay.

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Speaker 1: But that's because I was given a specific reason, and

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Speaker 1: then I maybe overdoing it because of that reason. But

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Speaker 1: I don't know if that's fear or just like I

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Speaker 1: have all of the information and now I am going

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Speaker 1: to probably helicopter parent a little bit. Well, I think

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Speaker 1: we have to. I I feel like I have a

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Speaker 1: healthy fear of the ocean, and I've always taught Rocko

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Speaker 1: did not turn his back on the ocean. I don't like.

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Speaker 1: I hated when he would just walk out of the

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Speaker 1: ocean without seeing what's going on behind him, because the

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Speaker 1: ocean is so powerful and we have no control over it,

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Speaker 1: to where I was so fearful of it that I

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Speaker 1: made him wear a life jacket until he was about

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Speaker 1: four or four and a half when we were at

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Speaker 1: the beach, even when he wasn't in the water. Do

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Speaker 1: you want me to make it worse? Okay, So we

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Speaker 1: were in Cabo and uh we went down to the beach.

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Speaker 1: We just checked under the hotel. I asked the lifeguard.

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Speaker 1: I said, Um, is the flag up that we can

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Speaker 1: swim right now? And he's like, yeah, the flags up.

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Speaker 1: You're good. We're you know, because some places in Cabbo

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Speaker 1: you can't swim at all because the tides are very strong.

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Speaker 1: So Cruz was still in his life jacket, and then

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Speaker 1: the girls and I just went in. We barely went

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Speaker 1: to our knees the there was a drop, and meanwhile

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Speaker 1: my husband is outside of the ocean videoing us, like

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Speaker 1: we're just got to the beach and I'm not kidding,

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Speaker 1: We're like drowning. Oh my god. Like we immediately get

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Speaker 1: sucked under the tide. I remember just pushing the kids

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Speaker 1: up to the top and I am like freaking out,

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Speaker 1: like I'm like and then I'm trying to yell, but

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Speaker 1: I'm like I made drown. I'm like, help Edward, I'm drowning.

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Speaker 1: And he's like he doesn't realize what's happening. He's like

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Speaker 1: giving us the thumbs up because you can't really tell

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Speaker 1: on the ocean. I end up. You know, Cruz was

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Speaker 1: the best of us because he had the life jacket on,

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Speaker 1: but he was the most scared. And then the girls

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Speaker 1: I just kind of push out and it was just

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Speaker 1: like one of those terrifying experiences where the girls were

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Speaker 1: immediately like more cool, but like that wasn't that was

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Speaker 1: not there. There was no chill in that, Like that

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Speaker 1: was no fun. I don't want to go in the ocean.

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Speaker 1: And I'm like, yeah, neither. Cruise was like next level

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Speaker 1: afraid and still is and he was the one affected

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Speaker 1: the least, but he was like that was frightening because

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Speaker 1: I think because he was the closest to me and

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Speaker 1: he could sense my fear. Oh I'm sure, Like I

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Speaker 1: just overall like I was like, I don't care if

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Speaker 1: I drowned right now, but these three kids need to

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Speaker 1: be okay. And then I walked out and then I

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Speaker 1: was so angry, like it went from fear to anger,

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Speaker 1: like how did this happen? How? And then I see

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Speaker 1: them switch the flag not five minutes later, and I'm like,

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Speaker 1: how did this happen? How could they let a mom

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Speaker 1: and three kids get into the ocean when it's like

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Speaker 1: and then I so it was first I was mad

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Speaker 1: at other people. First I was afraid, Then I was

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Speaker 1: mad at them, and then I was mad at myself.

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Speaker 1: Why did I just blindly go into the ocean? And

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Speaker 1: you know, and then you start second guessing yourself and

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Speaker 1: then you get into that entire spiral. And to be preferenced,

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Speaker 1: we didn't go into the ocean again while we're on

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Speaker 1: the trip. I wouldn't have either. Yeah, we went on

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Speaker 1: the boat and we went in the pool and all

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Speaker 1: those types of things. But we were like no, because

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Speaker 1: when you're in that moment, you just don't know what

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Speaker 1: to do. But that don't to me, that's like irrational fear, right,

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Speaker 1: that is something that happens from something We all still

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Speaker 1: talk about it, like, you know, to this day, traumatized,

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Speaker 1: like we're like remember that time we almost drowned, Like

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Speaker 1: it was like it's one of those moments. But I

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Speaker 1: do think that some people have fear of the ocean

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Speaker 1: that that has never happened to them. So that's what

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Speaker 1: I'm confused by. Maybe it's is it learned from hearing

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Speaker 1: this story like today, Sorry guys, if you're extra scared now,

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Speaker 1: because I just the story. Nobody is going to go

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Speaker 1: into the ocean never again. Here's here's a question. This

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Speaker 1: is Mark the producer. Hi, everybody, Um, so there's three

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Speaker 1: these I think these are facts. We are parents today

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Speaker 1: are more umbrella e and helicoptery and snowplowy than ever before.

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Speaker 1: Kids today have more anxiety than ever before. I gotta

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Speaker 1: believe those are related to each other. And I gotta

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Speaker 1: believe that the first one, the anxiety that parents, stems

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Speaker 1: from the Internet and local news that is only existing

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Speaker 1: to terrify you, right, Yeah, I mean also social media.

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Speaker 1: It's all over everywhere. Every abduction, every terrible thing that

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Speaker 1: happened to somebody is going to be on social media.

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Speaker 1: So I think those three things combined to create and

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Speaker 1: I don't know what that does the future generation. And

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Speaker 1: we'll also just the fact that there's apps for everything.

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Speaker 1: The other day there was a million people, like a

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Speaker 1: million cops driving near my house. Um, I've seen people

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Speaker 1: getting arrested. And I had somebody there that I was

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Speaker 1: working with and they're like, oh, do you have the

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Speaker 1: citizen app? And I'm like no, and they're like, oh, well,

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Speaker 1: I'll just pull it up. And they pulled it up

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Speaker 1: and they're like, oh, there's a potential kidnapping four houses down.

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Speaker 1: But the fact that you have that knowledge every break in,

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Speaker 1: every every armed you know, burglary or kidnapping or everything.

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Speaker 1: We're just we're bombarded with it and but there there's

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Speaker 1: no follow up and then so like I never I

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Speaker 1: went on to check again like two hours later, like

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Speaker 1: what it was, and it never told us. So like

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Speaker 1: I tried to like get out there what was happening,

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Speaker 1: Like I was like walking out like trying to see,

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Speaker 1: trying to ask the cops. Nobody. Obviously they're like, get

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Speaker 1: out of the way, crazy lady. But I was like

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Speaker 1: I need to know, like I need to know how

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Speaker 1: scared we need to be. But just having all that access,

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Speaker 1: and there were complete strangers that don't even live on

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Speaker 1: the street pulling up, that have the citizen app that

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Speaker 1: chase after these kinds of things. But it's creating like

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Speaker 1: our need to know, and I don't even know if

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Speaker 1: it's just become something in us it is because even

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Speaker 1: so the neighborhood that I live in has a resident

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Speaker 1: Facebook page, and I swear I hear a helicopter for

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Speaker 1: half a second and everybody's posting what's going on? Who

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Speaker 1: has the hotline number? Somebody called the Chopper hotline. That

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Speaker 1: one is another one that my wife. So I was like, oh,

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Speaker 1: you can't. We can no longer pay bills by sending

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Speaker 1: in checks like well, so I have to for the doctor,

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Speaker 1: I just send a check. You can't do that because

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Speaker 1: somebody three blocks over got their mail stolen and they

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Speaker 1: took their checking account number, and they stole their identity

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Speaker 1: and they emptied out their bank accounts. Something I can't

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Speaker 1: live my life like that. Are we setting up ourselves

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Speaker 1: to not be able to do anything without electronics and

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Speaker 1: we're powerless because we're afraid of the world. We're afraid

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Speaker 1: of everything, and we're instilling that fear on our children.

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Speaker 1: Know what else? I read that one of the biggest

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Speaker 1: fears that we have is loss of being disconnected from

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Speaker 1: our cell phones. Right, that is one of the Like

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Speaker 1: I looked it up. It's like that is we can't

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Speaker 1: even imagine. And to be perfectly honest, when I know

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Speaker 1: my phone is about to die, I'm not in a

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Speaker 1: good place. I'm like putting it on the low battle look,

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Speaker 1: I'd like need to charge now, just even thinking about it, like,

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Speaker 1: why does that? And that's a problem. I mean, we

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Speaker 1: know I never had a cell phone growing up, and

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Speaker 1: I mean even the fact that my seven year old

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Speaker 1: well has genuinely looked at me and gone like, mom,

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Speaker 1: do you think for my eighth birthday, could get a phone. No,

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Speaker 1: like I don't want you on the iPad. I don't

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Speaker 1: want you on the phone. I don't want you learning,

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Speaker 1: I don't want you becoming playing roadblocks with a roadblocks

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Speaker 1: or whatever it is with random strangers. Like that being said,

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Speaker 1: my parents were like, all right, be back before it's

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Speaker 1: dark ish. That's a good question though, so what is that?

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Speaker 1: Did our parents not care that? Did they not have

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Speaker 1: the worst case scenario going through their brains at all times?

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Speaker 1: They didn't because they weren't bombarded with it. I really

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Speaker 1: believe news was so different than but stuff like with

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Speaker 1: Teddy what with her daughter having a fever down the hall,

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Speaker 1: that's the same as it was fifty years ago. I

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Speaker 1: think our parents may have been the same when it

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Speaker 1: came to illness and things like that. But when it

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Speaker 1: comes to just I I thought, I still in my

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Speaker 1: mind think it's Los Angeles, But now that I've spoken

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Speaker 1: to more people are like, no, it's everywhere. But I

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Speaker 1: really I got up, said hi to my parents, rode

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Speaker 1: my bike to school, would come home by dinner. That

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Speaker 1: was the rule. And there was no way I was

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Speaker 1: checking in or doing any of those things. Like you

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Speaker 1: gotta believe that. If there's a day that I'm working

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Speaker 1: and I haven't I didn't pick up my kids myself.

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Speaker 1: I've got that text already to day and I'm like, hey, Dana,

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Speaker 1: everything good, You got the kids, so you guys on

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Speaker 1: the way to gymnastics blah blah blah. Like I have

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Speaker 1: somebody who drops Rocko off in the morning because I'm

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Speaker 1: already at work and she has to text me drop

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Speaker 1: off one. Great, yeah, I mean if I don't hear

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Speaker 1: it were by three sixteen, I'm on the horn. I'm like,

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Speaker 1: all good with the pickup, Like my name's passive aggressive

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Speaker 1: and I'm on one like yeah, and then the one.

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Speaker 1: But here's the problem. Then that one time you don't

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Speaker 1: check something happens. Nothing terrible, but like, oh, you know

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Speaker 1: we're calling because you know this hat cruise forgot is

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Speaker 1: blah blah blah. You know. I'm like, look, this is

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Speaker 1: why I gotta be this way, and it just justifies

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Speaker 1: my bad behavior. But think about our parents just leave

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Speaker 1: the house in the morning and come back in the

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Speaker 1: evening without ever checking in, and they were fine. They

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Speaker 1: they didn't have anxiety and freak outs. And we have

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Speaker 1: another problem, like I can't even then, Like my parents

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Speaker 1: also didn't sit with me why I did my homework.

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Speaker 1: It was like this is a whole separate. I mean

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Speaker 1: we need but like I can't even do my daughter's homework.

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Speaker 1: Helping my daughter with her the first grade? Do you

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Speaker 1: know that makes me feel about myself? Like she's like

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Speaker 1: going through her math and she's like, Mom, can you help?

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Speaker 1: And I'm like I have to take a picture of it,

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Speaker 1: texted to like my mom, friends and like anyone know

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Speaker 1: how to do these word problem math things? Not me?

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Speaker 1: You know, like but that didn't happen. Also, think about

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Speaker 1: being a teenager. I look back and I wouldn't even

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Speaker 1: I would go out before my mom got home from

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Speaker 1: work on Friday and I wouldn't be home until midnight.

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Speaker 1: I mean I wouldn't have She had no idea where

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Speaker 1: I was. I could be anyway. Were tracking you, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: there's no tracker. There was nothing nothing. I mean there

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Speaker 1: was like I remember coming well. I used to tell

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Speaker 1: my mom, Like my mom, this was like kind I

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Speaker 1: kind of love that she did this because I think

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Speaker 1: I turned out better than the alternative. But all my friends,

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Speaker 1: they had really strict parents, so they would all have

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Speaker 1: to sneak out. I had to go out, but my

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Speaker 1: mom is like, listen, just tell me you're going to

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Speaker 1: sneak out, so I know, and then I'll let you

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Speaker 1: sneak out. But like, can you just give me because

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Speaker 1: I don't want to wake up and work, And so

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Speaker 1: then it kind of became a thing. I'm like, all right,

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Speaker 1: we're sneaking out tonight, you know, but whatever it is.

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Speaker 1: But I wasn't ever saying where I was going, And

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Speaker 1: if I was telling where I was going, I was

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Speaker 1: probably lying like really, we're just going to a field

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Speaker 1: to drink until the like security comes by and like

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Speaker 1: we run home. Meanwhile, my daughter like a trunk or

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Speaker 1: treat two nights ago with a family with a neighbor,

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Speaker 1: family that we know really well, what is a trunk

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Speaker 1: or treats? It's a trick or treat, but with people's cars,

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Speaker 1: it's a scute. It's cute. But she was gone for

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Speaker 1: two hours. I must have checked the app to make

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Speaker 1: sure she was where she's supposed to be five times

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Speaker 1: in that two hours, just to make sure everything's fine.

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Speaker 1: But it's getting worse. The more the outreach that we

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Speaker 1: have to check, the more we want to know that's true.

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Speaker 1: That's it's it's the tail wagging the dogs. It really

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Speaker 1: is like and it's now the control like I've honestly

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Speaker 1: turned into complete control freak because of it. Let me

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Speaker 1: see if you agree with this statement I'm going to make.

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Speaker 1: I believe that the world today is the same amount

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Speaker 1: of dangerous as it was fifty years ago. We were

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Speaker 1: just not aware of it. There were child predators, then

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Speaker 1: there were child predators now. Horrible things happened then they

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Speaker 1: still happen now, just no one knew about it. Do

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Speaker 1: you agree? Or has the world gotten more dangerous? I

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Speaker 1: really don't know, because I was so oblivious to it.

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Speaker 1: I you know, I was always taught like, don't talk

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Speaker 1: to strangers. Now there's full seminars on how not to

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Speaker 1: talk to a stranger. And I think it's so funny

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Speaker 1: you bring that up, because I say this all the

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Speaker 1: time that we were told as children, don't talk to strangers,

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Speaker 1: don't get in a stranger's car, don't answer the door

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Speaker 1: to a stranger. And sometimes they think, Wow, I just

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Speaker 1: ubered someplace home and then I postmated something, and it's

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Speaker 1: like I'm inviting the strangers to my home, to my

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Speaker 1: home now. Yeah, no, there's the level of places we

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Speaker 1: it's unbelievable. But I mean even you tell your kids

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Speaker 1: or you tell yourself like, oh, there's nothing to be afraid.

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Speaker 1: But there will be the moments that I'm in an

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Speaker 1: uber and it's like really late or something happening, and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, I should text somebody the license plate number

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Speaker 1: just in case, seeming a little sketchy back here, you know.

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Speaker 1: But then your mind just starts going, and then you

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Speaker 1: start googling who was the last person abducted in an uber?

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Speaker 1: Like is my uber gonna get mad because I said

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Speaker 1: I preferred? And then you have them drop you off

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Speaker 1: at the house before I got No, I don't want

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Speaker 1: to talk to you. I just want to get home safely.

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Speaker 1: But now I think you're mad, so then I still

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Speaker 1: make small talk. Kill me? What is wrong with us?

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Speaker 1: I know, I know, but yeah, but the number Another

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Speaker 1: big fear that everybody had was the fear of being

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Speaker 1: alone for the rest of their life. Oh that was

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Speaker 1: a common one, like a lot of people writing it.

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Speaker 1: You know, I've gotten divorced or I'm an empty nest

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Speaker 1: and my husband's passed away, and I have a big

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Speaker 1: fear of being alone for the rest of my life.

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Speaker 1: And you know what, I really understand that fear. I

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00:17:46,080 --> 00:17:50,760
Speaker 1: do too, especially if they're they don't have a huge

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00:17:51,240 --> 00:17:54,960
Speaker 1: um family or friends that they can reach out to,

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00:17:55,359 --> 00:17:58,159
Speaker 1: and they're searching and searching, and that it makes me

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00:17:58,240 --> 00:18:02,080
Speaker 1: kind of feel more alone when really now we have

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00:18:02,160 --> 00:18:04,800
Speaker 1: the opportunity to reach out and be more vulnerable, and

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00:18:04,840 --> 00:18:08,159
Speaker 1: there are apps and things where you can start to

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Speaker 1: communicate with more people. But it's you know, sometimes our

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00:18:11,160 --> 00:18:13,800
Speaker 1: fears are so big in our heads. Like my husband

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Speaker 1: has a big fear of public speaking. Um, he's an

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Speaker 1: excellent public speaker, by the way he goes and does

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Speaker 1: huge conferences and blah blah blah blah. Like the way

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00:18:22,600 --> 00:18:25,040
Speaker 1: he preps is a totally different way that I prep.

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Speaker 1: Like I if I prep, then I'm a desist. You

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00:18:27,400 --> 00:18:29,040
Speaker 1: see me sometimes at the beginning of the show when

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Speaker 1: I'm prepping, I get tongue tied. I lose myself because

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Speaker 1: I have to just kind of go off the cuff.

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Speaker 1: That's who I am as a person. But he is

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Speaker 1: a person that really preps because of his fear. But

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Speaker 1: then you would never know it, Like he had does

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Speaker 1: this amazing speech and he comes down, I'm like that

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00:18:46,600 --> 00:18:49,679
Speaker 1: was incredible, and he's like you sure, I you know,

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Speaker 1: like I kind of went black, like your mind goes dumb.

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Speaker 1: And that will sometimes happen to me in press interviews too,

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Speaker 1: like if we were talking about the show or something

359
00:18:58,000 --> 00:19:01,720
Speaker 1: like that and somebody asked me something uncomfortable, I will

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00:19:01,800 --> 00:19:03,639
Speaker 1: answer and do the whole thing, and then I'll have

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00:19:03,680 --> 00:19:06,359
Speaker 1: to come out and ask my publicist was that okay?

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Speaker 1: And she's like why, and I'm like, I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I kind of like blacked it out, like I got scared,

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Speaker 1: and then I don't know how I answered it right.

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Speaker 1: Is that fear or is that like fear of what

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Speaker 1: other people are going to think, fear of being judged,

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00:19:22,600 --> 00:19:26,560
Speaker 1: fear of not seeing the right thing, fear of upsetting

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Speaker 1: people because now people also haven't a way to reach

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Speaker 1: you to tell you've pissed them, whereas before that didn't exist.

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Speaker 1: That fear of being judged by your peers, that's a

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Speaker 1: big one, especially with moms and their kids. And it's

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Speaker 1: like it's almost like with a lot of moms, if

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Speaker 1: the kids grades go down, you're not concerned for their education.

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Speaker 1: You're concerned with the other parents are going to think, yeah,

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00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:57,680
Speaker 1: for sure, I mean it's your faults. Well it's not,

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00:19:57,760 --> 00:20:01,120
Speaker 1: but you're taking it on as But also we I mean,

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00:20:01,520 --> 00:20:03,800
Speaker 1: our kids have started developed. This isn't really a fear,

378
00:20:03,840 --> 00:20:05,480
Speaker 1: but just things that are un comfortable. All of a sudden,

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Speaker 1: my daughter told me, can you not kiss me at

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Speaker 1: school anymore? Because the fear of what hurt the other

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Speaker 1: kids in her The other moms don't walk in, they

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00:20:13,320 --> 00:20:16,160
Speaker 1: do drop off. Can you not kiss me at the place?

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00:20:16,240 --> 00:20:19,600
Speaker 1: You know? And I'm like, and today she actually gave

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Speaker 1: me a kiss, and I got all excited, like and

385
00:20:23,840 --> 00:20:31,920
Speaker 1: she's like, this is why, Mom like but that it

386
00:20:32,119 --> 00:20:36,120
Speaker 1: starts so early, it does Like what did somebody say

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00:20:36,119 --> 00:20:38,040
Speaker 1: to her to make her think I shouldn't give my

388
00:20:38,080 --> 00:20:42,640
Speaker 1: mom a kiss goodbye at drop off? Yeah? We don't know, don't.

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Speaker 1: You couldn't have made that up on your own. Right

390
00:20:45,840 --> 00:20:49,000
Speaker 1: at home, you're the most loving, like cuddling, you know,

391
00:20:50,119 --> 00:20:52,600
Speaker 1: it's something that somebody is set. Yeah, that's got to

392
00:20:52,640 --> 00:20:54,920
Speaker 1: be that fear of fitting in the kids going through

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00:20:55,040 --> 00:20:57,120
Speaker 1: and we all remember that moment. How old is she?

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Speaker 1: She's seven? Yeah, I mean I think I think I

395
00:20:58,920 --> 00:21:00,800
Speaker 1: went through that older. But still every kid goes through

396
00:21:00,840 --> 00:21:03,959
Speaker 1: that moment when their parents become embarrassing. I thought, she

397
00:21:04,080 --> 00:21:05,960
Speaker 1: asked me today, and then I come here like this.

398
00:21:06,080 --> 00:21:08,000
Speaker 1: She goes, you're going to wear this and drop off.

399
00:21:08,040 --> 00:21:10,919
Speaker 1: I'm like yes, and then I'm going to iHeart so

400
00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:15,600
Speaker 1: thank you for making me feel bad about Then I'm

401
00:21:15,600 --> 00:21:20,720
Speaker 1: going to a business office. Then I had the fear

402
00:21:20,760 --> 00:21:24,800
Speaker 1: fitting in here guys, So sorry. All right, Michael Stevens

403
00:21:24,840 --> 00:21:26,720
Speaker 1: is on the line. You've seen some of his minefield

404
00:21:26,800 --> 00:21:30,359
Speaker 1: videos on YouTube. Yes, I am totally freaked out. I

405
00:21:30,359 --> 00:21:33,919
Speaker 1: can't wait to talk to him. Michael, Hello, Hello, how

406
00:21:33,960 --> 00:21:37,159
Speaker 1: are you? I'm good things, How are you? I'm not

407
00:21:37,240 --> 00:21:40,240
Speaker 1: too bad? Excited for Halloween. So do you think that

408
00:21:41,040 --> 00:21:45,159
Speaker 1: the majority of fear is taught or learned? I believe

409
00:21:45,200 --> 00:21:47,359
Speaker 1: that all fears are learned. I don't think anyone is

410
00:21:47,400 --> 00:21:50,399
Speaker 1: born afraid of anything. We are, of course, born with

411
00:21:50,480 --> 00:21:53,000
Speaker 1: these innate aversions, things that are like in our DNA

412
00:21:53,080 --> 00:21:56,080
Speaker 1: for us not to like pain. You don't like pain

413
00:21:56,160 --> 00:21:59,760
Speaker 1: from the moment you're you're born, disease fall. We have

414
00:21:59,800 --> 00:22:03,040
Speaker 1: re flexes that kick in when we fall. Um, all

415
00:22:03,040 --> 00:22:05,920
Speaker 1: of those things were innately a verse two, but when

416
00:22:05,960 --> 00:22:10,000
Speaker 1: we connect something new to those a versions. That's when

417
00:22:10,040 --> 00:22:13,320
Speaker 1: we have developed a fear. And I I mean I

418
00:22:13,359 --> 00:22:16,480
Speaker 1: just I looked out before today. The acronym for fear

419
00:22:16,560 --> 00:22:20,200
Speaker 1: is false evidence appearing real. But when it comes to pain,

420
00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:25,200
Speaker 1: that's not false, that's real. It's it's not false at all.

421
00:22:25,240 --> 00:22:27,680
Speaker 1: And if we weren't averse to pain, our species might

422
00:22:27,680 --> 00:22:30,320
Speaker 1: not still be here. So you know, in the right dosages,

423
00:22:30,600 --> 00:22:33,760
Speaker 1: fear and version are really helpful, right, And what is

424
00:22:33,800 --> 00:22:38,840
Speaker 1: fear and what's your gut instinct? Oh? Man, um, I

425
00:22:38,840 --> 00:22:43,000
Speaker 1: mean they're pretty different things. Fear is this emotional response

426
00:22:43,119 --> 00:22:46,280
Speaker 1: we developed towards something in our lives, Like I can

427
00:22:46,359 --> 00:22:50,040
Speaker 1: become afraid of needles because I start associating pain and

428
00:22:50,080 --> 00:22:52,800
Speaker 1: disease with them. But a gut instinct, I mean, that's

429
00:22:52,840 --> 00:22:57,760
Speaker 1: a I don't know, that's a feeling of you know,

430
00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:02,080
Speaker 1: I'm will to take a risk. I believe in this thing.

431
00:23:02,119 --> 00:23:05,320
Speaker 1: I'm not afraid of it. Right, So do you think

432
00:23:05,359 --> 00:23:08,320
Speaker 1: that all fear? I mean, I saw I saw your show,

433
00:23:08,400 --> 00:23:11,840
Speaker 1: so I do know all fear is relating to death.

434
00:23:12,600 --> 00:23:15,600
Speaker 1: But in my case, I truly feel like I am

435
00:23:15,640 --> 00:23:19,480
Speaker 1: more afraid of the unknown versus death. Like with my faith,

436
00:23:19,480 --> 00:23:23,919
Speaker 1: I'm not really scared to die. I am worried about

437
00:23:24,320 --> 00:23:27,520
Speaker 1: what would happen to my kids if I were to die.

438
00:23:27,600 --> 00:23:31,280
Speaker 1: But I am not afraid of death. But I am

439
00:23:31,359 --> 00:23:35,600
Speaker 1: deathly afraid of the unknown exactly. I mean, that is

440
00:23:35,640 --> 00:23:38,880
Speaker 1: case in point for why death is not, in my opinion,

441
00:23:38,880 --> 00:23:42,800
Speaker 1: the scariest thing. Not everyone scared of it. My grandmother,

442
00:23:42,800 --> 00:23:46,720
Speaker 1: who recently passed away, was ready. And faith gives you this,

443
00:23:46,720 --> 00:23:49,359
Speaker 1: this belief that you know, man, I don't you know

444
00:23:49,400 --> 00:23:52,280
Speaker 1: all when I die, that's God's will, So you know,

445
00:23:52,359 --> 00:23:54,760
Speaker 1: take me if you want me, right, There's something scary

446
00:23:54,800 --> 00:23:58,359
Speaker 1: about death to many people. So in the episode, I

447
00:23:58,400 --> 00:24:01,760
Speaker 1: wanted to find what would even scare those people, because

448
00:24:01,800 --> 00:24:05,400
Speaker 1: I wanted to find the true, the true scariest thing.

449
00:24:06,480 --> 00:24:09,920
Speaker 1: So I have a question about kids though, because kids,

450
00:24:10,640 --> 00:24:13,320
Speaker 1: you know, I've noticed with my seven year old some

451
00:24:13,440 --> 00:24:18,679
Speaker 1: of his friends aren't afraid of scary movies, something like it,

452
00:24:19,520 --> 00:24:24,800
Speaker 1: uh the Dark um or roller coasters. Yeah, my son

453
00:24:25,480 --> 00:24:30,000
Speaker 1: is afraid to watch scary movies, is afraid to get

454
00:24:30,000 --> 00:24:33,600
Speaker 1: on a roller coaster, even though he's had good experiences,

455
00:24:33,720 --> 00:24:37,560
Speaker 1: and is afraid of the dark. So what is that?

456
00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:41,600
Speaker 1: I have no idea, you know, I think it's a

457
00:24:41,600 --> 00:24:43,639
Speaker 1: good thing, though. It takes all kinds for us to

458
00:24:43,640 --> 00:24:46,280
Speaker 1: have a society. We need people who are brave and

459
00:24:46,480 --> 00:24:48,400
Speaker 1: maybe even fool hardy, and we also need people who

460
00:24:48,400 --> 00:24:52,440
Speaker 1: are cautious. Right to what extent, being afraid of roller

461
00:24:52,480 --> 00:24:55,600
Speaker 1: coasters when you're seven depends on the experiences you've had,

462
00:24:55,920 --> 00:24:59,240
Speaker 1: the psychology of you know, your parents and your environment

463
00:24:59,359 --> 00:25:02,120
Speaker 1: versus just what you're born with. That's still a really

464
00:25:02,160 --> 00:25:05,600
Speaker 1: open question. Um right now, there's a lot of investigating

465
00:25:05,920 --> 00:25:09,159
Speaker 1: of whether creepy quality spiders and snakes are in a

466
00:25:09,200 --> 00:25:13,200
Speaker 1: native version that we're born with or a thing we learned.

467
00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:15,920
Speaker 1: I kind of side on learning because there are people

468
00:25:15,960 --> 00:25:17,920
Speaker 1: who just aren't scared of them. You know, their job

469
00:25:18,000 --> 00:25:20,120
Speaker 1: is to take care of spiders and snakes, and they,

470
00:25:20,400 --> 00:25:24,640
Speaker 1: you know, don't. Spiders were actually the number one thing

471
00:25:24,680 --> 00:25:26,960
Speaker 1: I did an instagram just like what are you guys

472
00:25:27,040 --> 00:25:33,320
Speaker 1: most afraid of? And I'm not kidding it was spiders. Wow,

473
00:25:33,359 --> 00:25:36,880
Speaker 1: that just makes me feel bad for spiders. Honestly, they

474
00:25:36,880 --> 00:25:39,560
Speaker 1: can't help that they exist. But how do you come

475
00:25:39,800 --> 00:25:41,800
Speaker 1: Do you need to face your fears or can you

476
00:25:41,840 --> 00:25:45,040
Speaker 1: just live afraid of spiders? Well, you know, you can

477
00:25:45,080 --> 00:25:47,000
Speaker 1: live afraid of spiders. I think it's good to be

478
00:25:47,000 --> 00:25:49,680
Speaker 1: a kind of afraid of things. But once a fear

479
00:25:49,720 --> 00:25:54,480
Speaker 1: takes over your life, once it makes your life worse. Um,

480
00:25:54,520 --> 00:25:58,720
Speaker 1: and it's unreasonable, irrationals Now it's a phobia, and that's

481
00:25:58,720 --> 00:26:02,560
Speaker 1: not good. You know, exposure therapy can really help. We've

482
00:26:02,600 --> 00:26:04,679
Speaker 1: all heard about this. So you're afraid of elevators, Well,

483
00:26:04,800 --> 00:26:06,600
Speaker 1: what you need to do is just write a bunch

484
00:26:06,600 --> 00:26:09,200
Speaker 1: of elevators. It will be tough at first, but eventually

485
00:26:09,240 --> 00:26:11,960
Speaker 1: it will become boring and you'll realize, hey, I'm board,

486
00:26:12,000 --> 00:26:14,200
Speaker 1: which is the opposite of being afraid. This is awesome.

487
00:26:14,200 --> 00:26:18,480
Speaker 1: I'm cured. Well, does slight fibbing to your children count?

488
00:26:18,560 --> 00:26:22,399
Speaker 1: Because my son is scared of elevators, but he is

489
00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:26,080
Speaker 1: fine if he thinks a professional elevator conductor is inside

490
00:26:26,119 --> 00:26:28,480
Speaker 1: of the elevator with him. So I had to tell

491
00:26:28,560 --> 00:26:31,919
Speaker 1: him that I got my special license. So I like,

492
00:26:32,200 --> 00:26:34,840
Speaker 1: show him a little license. I'm like, look, buddy, I'm

493
00:26:34,840 --> 00:26:37,840
Speaker 1: good to operate this elevator. Blah blah blah. But that

494
00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:40,439
Speaker 1: gives him peace of mind, because before we came up

495
00:26:40,440 --> 00:26:44,240
Speaker 1: with that system, he would honestly see an elevator or

496
00:26:44,280 --> 00:26:46,639
Speaker 1: see we would go in somewhere and he'd have an

497
00:26:46,680 --> 00:26:49,000
Speaker 1: idea that there might not be stairs, and he goes,

498
00:26:49,000 --> 00:26:50,159
Speaker 1: I don't want to go anymore. I don't want to

499
00:26:50,200 --> 00:26:52,520
Speaker 1: go to David Busters because I think there's an elevator

500
00:26:52,560 --> 00:26:54,440
Speaker 1: there and there's not going to be a stair option.

501
00:26:54,680 --> 00:27:00,080
Speaker 1: And giving him that almost false assurance is an have

502
00:27:00,160 --> 00:27:03,399
Speaker 1: to get him an elevator. Yeah, you know, that's fine.

503
00:27:03,480 --> 00:27:07,159
Speaker 1: I think our lives are built on false false assurances

504
00:27:07,160 --> 00:27:09,720
Speaker 1: like it's going to be fine, you know, expect to

505
00:27:10,760 --> 00:27:12,600
Speaker 1: the worst, but prepare for the best, or however that

506
00:27:12,680 --> 00:27:15,800
Speaker 1: saying goes. You know, we're all, you know, having to

507
00:27:15,840 --> 00:27:17,600
Speaker 1: have a little bit of faith in things because it

508
00:27:17,680 --> 00:27:21,080
Speaker 1: might not be okay. But if you focus on that, um,

509
00:27:21,440 --> 00:27:23,719
Speaker 1: you know, the talk of a great life. Are we

510
00:27:23,800 --> 00:27:30,040
Speaker 1: actually addicted to fear? Like do we love to hate fear? Well?

511
00:27:30,040 --> 00:27:31,960
Speaker 1: I don't know. If I would say addicted to fear,

512
00:27:32,040 --> 00:27:36,639
Speaker 1: I would say that we really enjoy it, and we

513
00:27:36,720 --> 00:27:39,399
Speaker 1: have been built to enjoy it because it helps our

514
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:43,280
Speaker 1: species survive. If we didn't like being scared, we wouldn't

515
00:27:43,359 --> 00:27:46,280
Speaker 1: practice what it's like to feel threatened. When you see

516
00:27:46,280 --> 00:27:48,439
Speaker 1: a horror movie, your heart rate goes up and dribble

517
00:27:48,480 --> 00:27:51,080
Speaker 1: in pumps. But deep down you know that it's all pretend,

518
00:27:51,920 --> 00:27:55,560
Speaker 1: but you still get to practice what it's like to

519
00:27:55,600 --> 00:27:58,560
Speaker 1: have your body in that state of fear, and you can,

520
00:27:58,720 --> 00:28:00,720
Speaker 1: you know, yell at the screen, don't do that, you know,

521
00:28:00,760 --> 00:28:03,600
Speaker 1: don't go upstairs, blah blah blah. You literally are practicing

522
00:28:04,040 --> 00:28:06,560
Speaker 1: and preparing for when a real threat occurs. And that's

523
00:28:06,640 --> 00:28:11,200
Speaker 1: really useful. Oh that's interesting because you know, I've noticed

524
00:28:11,240 --> 00:28:13,360
Speaker 1: a lot is that we can love parts of something

525
00:28:13,600 --> 00:28:16,280
Speaker 1: but fear the other half. So like oftentimes you'll hear

526
00:28:16,480 --> 00:28:18,320
Speaker 1: people saying, oh, I got a beach house because I

527
00:28:18,359 --> 00:28:20,520
Speaker 1: love the ocean, but I don't go in because I'm

528
00:28:20,520 --> 00:28:23,439
Speaker 1: afraid of sharks drowning or getting lost at sea. Uh

529
00:28:23,520 --> 00:28:28,919
Speaker 1: huh yep, So what what is that? Oh man? It

530
00:28:29,080 --> 00:28:31,679
Speaker 1: is just the fact that we are full of multitudes, right,

531
00:28:32,080 --> 00:28:34,760
Speaker 1: Human beings are so complicated. It's why I love psychology

532
00:28:34,840 --> 00:28:37,560
Speaker 1: because it's never going to be done. I believe that

533
00:28:37,600 --> 00:28:39,880
Speaker 1: we'll find a theory of everything in physics before we

534
00:28:39,920 --> 00:28:43,200
Speaker 1: figure out what the heck love is, let alone fear

535
00:28:43,520 --> 00:28:45,200
Speaker 1: and why you can love the ocean but not when

536
00:28:45,240 --> 00:28:46,920
Speaker 1: you're too close to it or when you're in a boat,

537
00:28:46,960 --> 00:28:50,800
Speaker 1: you know, um, And it's hard to study these things.

538
00:28:50,920 --> 00:28:54,680
Speaker 1: Psychology is difficult. If I want to study you know, protons,

539
00:28:54,760 --> 00:28:57,280
Speaker 1: I can literally smash them together in a particle collider,

540
00:28:57,600 --> 00:28:59,840
Speaker 1: but I can't smash two people together. Look at what's

541
00:28:59,840 --> 00:29:04,720
Speaker 1: in side that benethical so hard to investigate psychology and

542
00:29:05,040 --> 00:29:10,040
Speaker 1: human behavior. Should fear be seen as a weakness, No,

543
00:29:10,280 --> 00:29:12,720
Speaker 1: not at all. In fact, it's the strength. It's why

544
00:29:12,760 --> 00:29:15,200
Speaker 1: we have survived for so long. If we and our

545
00:29:15,240 --> 00:29:17,760
Speaker 1: ancestors weren't afraid of things, I think we would have

546
00:29:17,800 --> 00:29:21,400
Speaker 1: taken risks that may have led to you know, kids

547
00:29:21,440 --> 00:29:23,760
Speaker 1: not being made, and then kids and then finally us.

548
00:29:23,840 --> 00:29:26,920
Speaker 1: So it's an important part of being able to survive

549
00:29:26,960 --> 00:29:30,040
Speaker 1: on a planet full of threats, fear and then how

550
00:29:30,080 --> 00:29:33,000
Speaker 1: do you overcome in a safe way. For some of

551
00:29:33,040 --> 00:29:36,720
Speaker 1: our listeners who are very afraid of spiders or the dark,

552
00:29:36,920 --> 00:29:40,320
Speaker 1: or elevators or in my case, I'm very afraid of

553
00:29:40,360 --> 00:29:43,680
Speaker 1: parking garages. And today I had to switch which parking

554
00:29:43,680 --> 00:29:45,960
Speaker 1: garage I had to come into, and I was all

555
00:29:46,160 --> 00:29:48,800
Speaker 1: repped up, like maybe I shouldn't go, Maybe I should

556
00:29:48,840 --> 00:29:51,440
Speaker 1: park down the street and walk, Like I had come

557
00:29:51,520 --> 00:29:52,840
Speaker 1: up with all these things, and I was like, I

558
00:29:52,880 --> 00:29:54,400
Speaker 1: don't have the time. I just need to pull into

559
00:29:54,440 --> 00:29:57,120
Speaker 1: this parking garage. But like, how is a way to

560
00:29:57,520 --> 00:30:01,160
Speaker 1: overcome them? Example, I just went into this parking garage,

561
00:30:01,160 --> 00:30:03,560
Speaker 1: but sometimes like if I had the time, I wouldn't

562
00:30:03,600 --> 00:30:07,080
Speaker 1: have right, So how well, if you have the time,

563
00:30:07,560 --> 00:30:09,600
Speaker 1: then you don't have to go into the parking garage

564
00:30:09,600 --> 00:30:12,600
Speaker 1: and you shouldn't be ashamed of that. Um if you are,

565
00:30:12,920 --> 00:30:17,160
Speaker 1: then exposing yourself to it safely can really help. You know,

566
00:30:17,640 --> 00:30:21,240
Speaker 1: go into parking garages but with friends, right, with people

567
00:30:21,280 --> 00:30:24,680
Speaker 1: who support you, and you will um become more and

568
00:30:24,720 --> 00:30:28,560
Speaker 1: more familiar with them, and exposure therapy like that can

569
00:30:28,600 --> 00:30:31,360
Speaker 1: reduce a fear. Um. But you know, I say, if

570
00:30:31,360 --> 00:30:33,120
Speaker 1: you have the time, you don't have to do things

571
00:30:33,120 --> 00:30:35,080
Speaker 1: you don't want to do, and you shouldn't be afraid

572
00:30:35,200 --> 00:30:37,800
Speaker 1: unless it actually affects the quality of your life and

573
00:30:37,840 --> 00:30:40,920
Speaker 1: you want things to change. What if somebody's like become

574
00:30:40,960 --> 00:30:44,960
Speaker 1: like agreaphobic or those types of things. Do you think

575
00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:49,080
Speaker 1: those start out small and just turn into a way

576
00:30:49,120 --> 00:30:52,200
Speaker 1: bigger thing? Like do you think it only can? And

577
00:30:52,280 --> 00:30:55,240
Speaker 1: you know, I'm not a psychiatrist, but I can speak

578
00:30:55,240 --> 00:30:57,800
Speaker 1: from my own life I think that these things snowball.

579
00:30:58,200 --> 00:31:01,080
Speaker 1: If you're afraid of going out, then you go out less,

580
00:31:01,240 --> 00:31:05,560
Speaker 1: which means you're exposed to strangers and people in public less,

581
00:31:05,600 --> 00:31:08,360
Speaker 1: and it just gets worse than worse. It still with

582
00:31:08,560 --> 00:31:13,320
Speaker 1: anxiety and all of that, So it's it just, yeah,

583
00:31:13,440 --> 00:31:16,720
Speaker 1: it becomes bigger. And you said that we weren't born

584
00:31:16,760 --> 00:31:20,240
Speaker 1: with any fears, So is there always an incident that

585
00:31:20,360 --> 00:31:24,600
Speaker 1: links us to our fears? Yeah, there there is. I

586
00:31:24,600 --> 00:31:28,040
Speaker 1: don't know if it's always just one incident, but you know,

587
00:31:28,120 --> 00:31:30,440
Speaker 1: take the fear of the dark. We are not born

588
00:31:30,840 --> 00:31:33,920
Speaker 1: with a with an aversion to darkness. Our DNA doesn't

589
00:31:33,920 --> 00:31:36,160
Speaker 1: contain that, and it's a good thing it doesn't, because

590
00:31:36,160 --> 00:31:40,040
Speaker 1: it's pretty dark inside our mom's wombs. Right. So, um,

591
00:31:40,080 --> 00:31:43,760
Speaker 1: but once we developed an imagination, um, what is that?

592
00:31:43,840 --> 00:31:46,040
Speaker 1: Around like the age of two, you know, obviously it

593
00:31:46,120 --> 00:31:48,040
Speaker 1: varies from child to child, but you start to be

594
00:31:48,080 --> 00:31:51,440
Speaker 1: able to as this little kid go, wait, there might

595
00:31:51,480 --> 00:31:55,040
Speaker 1: be something in the darkness that, um is that? And

596
00:31:55,080 --> 00:31:56,760
Speaker 1: I can't tell what it is? And now you're aware

597
00:31:56,760 --> 00:31:59,880
Speaker 1: of the unknown and you can imagine what might have

598
00:32:00,040 --> 00:32:03,000
Speaker 1: up and now you're afraid. So sometimes it's not even

599
00:32:03,040 --> 00:32:05,320
Speaker 1: an experience. You don't have to be hurt by something

600
00:32:05,320 --> 00:32:08,120
Speaker 1: in the dark. You can just start imagining that it's possible,

601
00:32:08,280 --> 00:32:12,160
Speaker 1: and that's enough to become afraid of something. Right are

602
00:32:12,200 --> 00:32:18,120
Speaker 1: our dreams and nightmares? Are they are subconscious fears? Oh? Man,

603
00:32:18,560 --> 00:32:21,240
Speaker 1: I wish we knew. Um. You know, my favorite theory

604
00:32:21,280 --> 00:32:25,320
Speaker 1: about dreams is that it's about memory. That it's about um,

605
00:32:25,880 --> 00:32:29,800
Speaker 1: short term memory being kind of filed away or deleted,

606
00:32:30,200 --> 00:32:32,840
Speaker 1: and as these messages are shared between short and long

607
00:32:32,920 --> 00:32:35,880
Speaker 1: term memory, UM, parts of us that are still kind

608
00:32:35,920 --> 00:32:38,080
Speaker 1: of awake try to make sense of all these things

609
00:32:38,440 --> 00:32:40,160
Speaker 1: and try to imagine, well, this must be happening. I

610
00:32:40,160 --> 00:32:43,400
Speaker 1: don't know why, why the you know, hippocampus is sending

611
00:32:43,440 --> 00:32:46,000
Speaker 1: me this thing about you know, my mom. I must

612
00:32:46,040 --> 00:32:47,880
Speaker 1: be talking to her. And that's what I think that

613
00:32:47,920 --> 00:32:52,600
Speaker 1: a dream is when they become scary. Um, I wish

614
00:32:52,680 --> 00:32:56,360
Speaker 1: we knew more. Um. We did an episode of Mindfield

615
00:32:56,440 --> 00:33:01,400
Speaker 1: about trying to actually record people's dreams movies by looking

616
00:33:01,400 --> 00:33:04,920
Speaker 1: at how their brain act when they're watching a real

617
00:33:05,000 --> 00:33:08,000
Speaker 1: movie and then learning how to read their brain state

618
00:33:08,080 --> 00:33:12,880
Speaker 1: to figure out what their dreaming. And it's it's really crazy.

619
00:33:12,920 --> 00:33:15,320
Speaker 1: There's a long way to go. But I mean, it's

620
00:33:15,320 --> 00:33:19,080
Speaker 1: hard to answer a question about our nightmares are fears

621
00:33:19,280 --> 00:33:21,080
Speaker 1: when we don't even know what the heck of dream

622
00:33:21,120 --> 00:33:24,440
Speaker 1: or a nightmare is. Still. Have you seen that movie Fearless?

623
00:33:24,560 --> 00:33:27,640
Speaker 1: I just watched it Friday night. It's it's an older

624
00:33:27,720 --> 00:33:31,720
Speaker 1: movie with Jeff Bridges and where it starts off with

625
00:33:32,560 --> 00:33:37,600
Speaker 1: a huge plane crash and he ends up fearless. But

626
00:33:37,720 --> 00:33:39,840
Speaker 1: it was really weird that I watched this on Friday

627
00:33:39,840 --> 00:33:43,520
Speaker 1: because it was really is there such thing as being fearless?

628
00:33:43,600 --> 00:33:46,160
Speaker 1: And does that just mean, I mean, in lack of

629
00:33:46,200 --> 00:33:49,160
Speaker 1: a better word, like do you no longer have any

630
00:33:49,200 --> 00:33:53,480
Speaker 1: protection of yourself? Yes? There is there is fearless for real.

631
00:33:53,720 --> 00:33:55,360
Speaker 1: I haven't seen the movie, but I should watch it.

632
00:33:56,040 --> 00:33:59,760
Speaker 1: In the documentary, What's the scariest thing, we finally have

633
00:33:59,840 --> 00:34:03,840
Speaker 1: to deal with a very rare condition where people um

634
00:34:03,880 --> 00:34:06,400
Speaker 1: as they grow up, they have some genetic disorder that

635
00:34:06,440 --> 00:34:10,960
Speaker 1: causes the amygdala in their brain to um carawl apart

636
00:34:11,080 --> 00:34:14,160
Speaker 1: to degrade, and when they're adults, they don't have functioning amigdala.

637
00:34:14,400 --> 00:34:17,120
Speaker 1: And as it turns out, the amygdala UM is the

638
00:34:17,160 --> 00:34:20,360
Speaker 1: part of the brain that learns fears, and these people

639
00:34:20,480 --> 00:34:22,879
Speaker 1: we know of three of them. They all have pseudonyms.

640
00:34:22,880 --> 00:34:25,440
Speaker 1: Their identities are not public because it wouldn't be safe

641
00:34:25,520 --> 00:34:29,239
Speaker 1: for this to be known. But they cannot feel fear. Seriously,

642
00:34:29,520 --> 00:34:31,239
Speaker 1: you jump out at them in the dark and they

643
00:34:31,280 --> 00:34:33,839
Speaker 1: will just be annoyed. They are not scared to find.

644
00:34:35,680 --> 00:34:38,120
Speaker 1: I know it's hilarious, but it's a weird life and

645
00:34:38,160 --> 00:34:41,080
Speaker 1: they know that it's wrong. And so this patient called

646
00:34:41,280 --> 00:34:46,400
Speaker 1: s M came forward um and the researchers were like,

647
00:34:46,480 --> 00:34:49,759
Speaker 1: this is incredible. Um. We always thought the amigdala was

648
00:34:49,800 --> 00:34:54,800
Speaker 1: important in uh connecting aversions to new experiences and creating

649
00:34:54,800 --> 00:34:58,239
Speaker 1: a fear. And you don't have amigala. Um, so you're

650
00:34:58,320 --> 00:35:01,920
Speaker 1: right and you're not feeling fear. There is, however, still

651
00:35:02,160 --> 00:35:04,720
Speaker 1: one thing that even the three people we have found

652
00:35:04,719 --> 00:35:07,960
Speaker 1: who do not have a magala can panic over, can

653
00:35:08,000 --> 00:35:11,120
Speaker 1: actually feel fear over. And so in the documentary that

654
00:35:11,200 --> 00:35:13,400
Speaker 1: becomes the I think the best answer for what's the

655
00:35:13,440 --> 00:35:17,080
Speaker 1: scariest thing with all of the technology. Now, you know,

656
00:35:17,120 --> 00:35:19,919
Speaker 1: when we have Generation z s and we have millennials,

657
00:35:20,000 --> 00:35:23,840
Speaker 1: and I think our kids are zers because they're so little,

658
00:35:24,680 --> 00:35:27,360
Speaker 1: are they going to have a different set of fears

659
00:35:27,400 --> 00:35:33,719
Speaker 1: than we do? As you know, adults, there's already a

660
00:35:33,760 --> 00:35:38,080
Speaker 1: brand new phobia that's emerged called nomo phobia. Nomo phobia,

661
00:35:38,160 --> 00:35:40,160
Speaker 1: it is the fear of not having a working cell

662
00:35:40,200 --> 00:35:43,480
Speaker 1: phone with you. Decades ago, that fear didn't exist and

663
00:35:43,520 --> 00:35:46,839
Speaker 1: couldn't exist. But now there's a new normal, and so

664
00:35:47,600 --> 00:35:49,799
Speaker 1: we have this innative version of the abnormal. But what's

665
00:35:49,920 --> 00:35:53,160
Speaker 1: abnormal changes as time goes on, as new generations come in,

666
00:35:53,280 --> 00:35:58,399
Speaker 1: so theaters are always evolving. Wow, thank you. That's so

667
00:35:58,880 --> 00:36:00,920
Speaker 1: I didn't even think about at but all of us

668
00:36:00,960 --> 00:36:06,799
Speaker 1: are suffering from that. Sure, I feel guilty about it,

669
00:36:06,840 --> 00:36:09,560
Speaker 1: but it's like, well, I don't know. I mean, my

670
00:36:09,680 --> 00:36:11,560
Speaker 1: dad was afraid of, you know, things that I'm not

671
00:36:11,560 --> 00:36:14,239
Speaker 1: afraid of because it's not important anymore. Um, but it

672
00:36:14,320 --> 00:36:17,759
Speaker 1: was when he was my age, So I don't know. Um,

673
00:36:17,800 --> 00:36:20,840
Speaker 1: it's kind of exciting. Um. But yeah, here will continue

674
00:36:20,840 --> 00:36:23,000
Speaker 1: to play a big part in all of our lives. Well,

675
00:36:23,040 --> 00:36:24,960
Speaker 1: thanks so much for talking to us today. We really

676
00:36:24,960 --> 00:36:38,080
Speaker 1: appreciate it. My pleasure is great being on Bye bye bye. Okay,

677
00:36:38,160 --> 00:36:43,120
Speaker 1: we are back now with the King of Pain. Rob

678
00:36:43,280 --> 00:36:46,480
Speaker 1: came men Olivia. I mean, my very first question, I

679
00:36:46,520 --> 00:36:49,160
Speaker 1: just need to know why and how did you get

680
00:36:49,160 --> 00:36:52,879
Speaker 1: into this? That's a very fair question. Um. I think

681
00:36:52,920 --> 00:36:55,520
Speaker 1: me and my co host Adam Thorne both have a

682
00:36:55,560 --> 00:36:58,840
Speaker 1: fascination with nature, and so we wanted to see what

683
00:36:58,880 --> 00:37:00,960
Speaker 1: these bits and things can do. We've both been bitten

684
00:37:01,360 --> 00:37:04,319
Speaker 1: on accident in our personal lives while handling animals. I'm

685
00:37:04,320 --> 00:37:08,440
Speaker 1: an animal handler, Adams a wildlifeologist, and so we thought

686
00:37:08,480 --> 00:37:10,239
Speaker 1: we'd take it to the next level. But I don't

687
00:37:10,239 --> 00:37:13,560
Speaker 1: think we realized how far that next level is about

688
00:37:13,600 --> 00:37:15,720
Speaker 1: to go. Well, I have to say, I just watched

689
00:37:15,719 --> 00:37:18,360
Speaker 1: your snake biting video, which like, now I'm like looking

690
00:37:18,360 --> 00:37:21,880
Speaker 1: at your arm and I see a little scar. I

691
00:37:21,960 --> 00:37:24,040
Speaker 1: never had a fear of snakes, and then I just

692
00:37:24,120 --> 00:37:26,120
Speaker 1: watched that and I was like, you know what I

693
00:37:26,239 --> 00:37:29,040
Speaker 1: might be the next hike, Like, I'm not really interested.

694
00:37:29,520 --> 00:37:31,360
Speaker 1: I don't need I think you called it a fang

695
00:37:31,600 --> 00:37:33,960
Speaker 1: Like I'm good on the fangs going into my arm.

696
00:37:34,880 --> 00:37:40,759
Speaker 1: I how do you when it's about to happen? How

697
00:37:40,800 --> 00:37:44,880
Speaker 1: do you not like run away? Oh? Yeah, well it

698
00:37:45,000 --> 00:37:47,719
Speaker 1: is very scary, and that's not what we want. We

699
00:37:47,719 --> 00:37:52,520
Speaker 1: don't want you scared of snakes, but but we also

700
00:37:52,520 --> 00:37:54,640
Speaker 1: don't want people just picking them up. Willy nilly like

701
00:37:54,680 --> 00:37:56,480
Speaker 1: you see a lot of people doing nowadays. They think,

702
00:37:56,480 --> 00:37:58,759
Speaker 1: oh I saw this on YouTube and this guy was

703
00:37:58,760 --> 00:38:00,600
Speaker 1: picking up this snake, and then they try to do

704
00:38:00,640 --> 00:38:03,040
Speaker 1: it like the next thing. They're in the hospital or something.

705
00:38:03,120 --> 00:38:07,279
Speaker 1: So we want to balance um. For me, believe it

706
00:38:07,360 --> 00:38:09,640
Speaker 1: or not, the snake was not the scariest one. We

707
00:38:09,760 --> 00:38:11,759
Speaker 1: knew how much damage you could do. But Ab and

708
00:38:11,800 --> 00:38:14,480
Speaker 1: I both love snakes. But we had that sort of

709
00:38:14,520 --> 00:38:20,480
Speaker 1: informed dread of knowing how bad this BikeE could go. Um,

710
00:38:20,520 --> 00:38:23,520
Speaker 1: which for our listeners, how bad could it go? The

711
00:38:23,640 --> 00:38:26,560
Speaker 1: typical python bite is not going to be too bad.

712
00:38:26,760 --> 00:38:29,760
Speaker 1: You're talking to some puncture wounds and a lot of blood.

713
00:38:30,320 --> 00:38:33,880
Speaker 1: But if you pull away or if the snake the

714
00:38:33,920 --> 00:38:38,000
Speaker 1: size of twist, then you're talking huge lacerations. You're gonna

715
00:38:38,239 --> 00:38:40,560
Speaker 1: you're gonna look in an arm and see meat and

716
00:38:40,640 --> 00:38:43,720
Speaker 1: flesh and whatever else wants. And that's what it did, Adam.

717
00:38:43,760 --> 00:38:47,120
Speaker 1: It it twisted its its body and just shredded them

718
00:38:47,160 --> 00:38:51,280
Speaker 1: like a cheese grater. Yeah, it's pretty bad. Mine didn't

719
00:38:51,280 --> 00:38:55,239
Speaker 1: look so bad. But with any of these projects, there

720
00:38:55,360 --> 00:38:59,160
Speaker 1: is an element of danger that we cannot really control.

721
00:39:00,360 --> 00:39:04,480
Speaker 1: And one of the teeth not really things Uh, pythons

722
00:39:04,520 --> 00:39:07,000
Speaker 1: don't have things, but they're they're bigger than snap things.

723
00:39:08,360 --> 00:39:10,719
Speaker 1: One of them clip my older nerve and that was

724
00:39:10,760 --> 00:39:12,760
Speaker 1: something we tried to prevent. We did in an area

725
00:39:13,160 --> 00:39:15,800
Speaker 1: of a lot of muscle. But these python teeth on

726
00:39:15,840 --> 00:39:19,120
Speaker 1: the reticulated python are huge. How big are they? The

727
00:39:19,120 --> 00:39:22,879
Speaker 1: one we did was sixteen foot. Uh supposedly they get

728
00:39:22,920 --> 00:39:25,399
Speaker 1: twice that. You just don't see that in a while.

729
00:39:25,480 --> 00:39:30,200
Speaker 1: We were really lucky to get a sixteen foot so unlucky.

730
00:39:30,760 --> 00:39:33,319
Speaker 1: But for somebody, like you know, I did a little

731
00:39:33,360 --> 00:39:37,319
Speaker 1: pole on my Instagram like number one fear and surprisingly

732
00:39:37,400 --> 00:39:40,000
Speaker 1: to me, a number one fear for everybody is spiders

733
00:39:40,719 --> 00:39:43,919
Speaker 1: and like they are deathly afraid of spiders, Like even

734
00:39:43,960 --> 00:39:46,600
Speaker 1: the thought of a spider is putting them into a tailspin.

735
00:39:47,960 --> 00:39:51,399
Speaker 1: How working around animals and working around knowing what they

736
00:39:51,440 --> 00:39:57,040
Speaker 1: can do, how do you face those spears without being dangerous? Well,

737
00:39:57,040 --> 00:39:59,480
Speaker 1: that's funny, say spiders, because that was my number one

738
00:39:59,480 --> 00:40:02,319
Speaker 1: phobia for many years. Believe it or not, a lot

739
00:40:02,360 --> 00:40:07,800
Speaker 1: of snake guys are terrified of spiders. Stop that phobia

740
00:40:07,880 --> 00:40:13,520
Speaker 1: come from I don't know, They're so gross, very sick now, Um, yeah,

741
00:40:13,800 --> 00:40:16,319
Speaker 1: it's just something about these very little things that can

742
00:40:16,400 --> 00:40:19,799
Speaker 1: run around in any direction. You can't really predict, no

743
00:40:19,920 --> 00:40:23,440
Speaker 1: control over them. I had I live in an area

744
00:40:23,560 --> 00:40:26,840
Speaker 1: in a canyon, and a year ago there was a

745
00:40:26,960 --> 00:40:31,319
Speaker 1: huge brown recluse that had built this huge web. So

746
00:40:31,360 --> 00:40:34,239
Speaker 1: I called one of my friends from Montana because I

747
00:40:34,280 --> 00:40:36,439
Speaker 1: figured they would know what to do, and he said,

748
00:40:36,800 --> 00:40:40,279
Speaker 1: put your hair up, put a winter hat on, put

749
00:40:40,280 --> 00:40:45,040
Speaker 1: a big sweatshirt on, get the broom and pretend you're

750
00:40:45,120 --> 00:40:49,160
Speaker 1: about the bases are loaded and you have the last

751
00:40:49,239 --> 00:40:52,000
Speaker 1: hit in the World Series game and let the broom

752
00:40:52,480 --> 00:40:56,240
Speaker 1: go with it. So I did it, and it worked,

753
00:40:56,560 --> 00:41:01,200
Speaker 1: knocked a home run. I totally thought a year I

754
00:41:01,280 --> 00:41:04,360
Speaker 1: wasn't so afraid of spiders anymore. I was like, Oh,

755
00:41:04,560 --> 00:41:07,680
Speaker 1: I've got this. I can do this because you took control.

756
00:41:07,719 --> 00:41:11,240
Speaker 1: Well until like six months ago when I was watering

757
00:41:11,280 --> 00:41:16,120
Speaker 1: the plants and I look up and there's a same spider.

758
00:41:16,200 --> 00:41:19,680
Speaker 1: I think maybe it was different because I'm still alive.

759
00:41:20,719 --> 00:41:24,640
Speaker 1: But so I tried to spray it with a hose

760
00:41:25,440 --> 00:41:29,120
Speaker 1: and it felt my hair and I had a jumpsuit on.

761
00:41:29,560 --> 00:41:33,720
Speaker 1: Went down the back of my jumpsuit and started biting

762
00:41:33,960 --> 00:41:39,520
Speaker 1: my back like fifteen times, and I couldn't strip on

763
00:41:39,600 --> 00:41:43,960
Speaker 1: the like my patio, I would have been a nudist.

764
00:41:45,360 --> 00:41:49,200
Speaker 1: I ran into the house and I was like, ah,

765
00:41:49,280 --> 00:41:54,520
Speaker 1: I mean it was Now I'm terrified. I'm like petrified.

766
00:41:54,719 --> 00:41:56,600
Speaker 1: If I opened the door and I see a spider,

767
00:41:56,640 --> 00:41:59,440
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, I can't go outside, I can't go

768
00:41:59,480 --> 00:42:03,759
Speaker 1: to work. I don't even learn what kind of spiders

769
00:42:03,760 --> 00:42:06,000
Speaker 1: they are. Like if I see one like we've had,

770
00:42:06,040 --> 00:42:07,400
Speaker 1: we had them kind of back because I think it

771
00:42:07,480 --> 00:42:09,799
Speaker 1: was hot, so then we had to have somebody coming

772
00:42:09,800 --> 00:42:11,880
Speaker 1: in spray. But I don't I see a different colored one.

773
00:42:11,880 --> 00:42:14,560
Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't even want to know. Like if

774
00:42:14,600 --> 00:42:16,399
Speaker 1: I know that, I'm going to be in a worse

775
00:42:16,480 --> 00:42:18,279
Speaker 1: situation than I am now. So I'm just going to

776
00:42:18,400 --> 00:42:21,560
Speaker 1: pretend that this spider is like not a problem, even

777
00:42:21,560 --> 00:42:24,800
Speaker 1: though it's bigger than my face. They've been really big.

778
00:42:24,840 --> 00:42:28,200
Speaker 1: They've been ginormous with like dots, yes, but don't tell

779
00:42:28,200 --> 00:42:30,840
Speaker 1: me what kind it is. But but when it comes

780
00:42:30,880 --> 00:42:33,600
Speaker 1: to animal, when it comes to knowing that something terrible

781
00:42:33,640 --> 00:42:38,600
Speaker 1: can happen to you, how do you sit in that well?

782
00:42:38,719 --> 00:42:42,680
Speaker 1: Because we're doing it for a reason, and um, we're

783
00:42:42,760 --> 00:42:46,440
Speaker 1: creating a scale of how bad the pain hurts, how

784
00:42:46,480 --> 00:42:49,600
Speaker 1: long it lasts, and does it cause any damage. And

785
00:42:49,680 --> 00:42:52,720
Speaker 1: so when you were bitten by the spider or someone

786
00:42:52,760 --> 00:42:54,759
Speaker 1: else has bitten by another animal, if it's something we

787
00:42:54,880 --> 00:42:57,279
Speaker 1: put on the pain index, it really helped people not

788
00:42:57,360 --> 00:43:00,319
Speaker 1: to panic because panics, the number one killer pull, do

789
00:43:00,320 --> 00:43:02,520
Speaker 1: all kinds of stupid stuff when they're bitten by animals.

790
00:43:02,680 --> 00:43:04,879
Speaker 1: People get bitten by rattlesnakes and start cutting open their

791
00:43:05,000 --> 00:43:07,479
Speaker 1: arms and just making it worse. And so we're hoping

792
00:43:07,480 --> 00:43:09,480
Speaker 1: to arm people, and so that kind of gives us

793
00:43:09,520 --> 00:43:13,200
Speaker 1: a little extra courage. There's a there's a reason for

794
00:43:13,239 --> 00:43:17,000
Speaker 1: it because the whole uh more big curiosity that Adam

795
00:43:17,040 --> 00:43:21,240
Speaker 1: and I went into this with that's gone, that's originally started,

796
00:43:21,360 --> 00:43:23,200
Speaker 1: was it to help people? Are really like we need

797
00:43:23,239 --> 00:43:26,680
Speaker 1: to know. I think I think I think the real

798
00:43:26,719 --> 00:43:28,640
Speaker 1: reason we started was that was to help people. But

799
00:43:28,840 --> 00:43:30,839
Speaker 1: I think for us personally, we just wanted to know.

800
00:43:30,960 --> 00:43:34,560
Speaker 1: We we had so many questions and um, we've answered

801
00:43:34,560 --> 00:43:36,680
Speaker 1: a lot, but we have a lot more questions after

802
00:43:36,800 --> 00:43:40,760
Speaker 1: doing this because what's the biggest answer you've gotten? Ah,

803
00:43:40,800 --> 00:43:45,439
Speaker 1: that is unpredictable. Um, this guide, this, this index will

804
00:43:45,480 --> 00:43:47,840
Speaker 1: be a really good guide, but it's never gonna be

805
00:43:47,920 --> 00:43:52,360
Speaker 1: right on because everyone reacts differently, and so, uh, we

806
00:43:52,400 --> 00:43:55,360
Speaker 1: would like when people get bitten to look up that

807
00:43:55,520 --> 00:43:57,520
Speaker 1: animal that we've already been bitten by and see what

808
00:43:57,600 --> 00:44:00,319
Speaker 1: to expect. At the same time, you know, maybe go

809
00:44:00,400 --> 00:44:04,080
Speaker 1: get medical help, don't panic because some people react differently.

810
00:44:04,120 --> 00:44:06,200
Speaker 1: A lot of times I'll be fine, it will hurt

811
00:44:06,320 --> 00:44:08,440
Speaker 1: and then there's no big reaction on my skin, and

812
00:44:08,480 --> 00:44:10,719
Speaker 1: Adam will be turning like red as a beat And

813
00:44:10,719 --> 00:44:13,520
Speaker 1: it's just because everyone reacts differently. Have you thought of

814
00:44:13,560 --> 00:44:19,440
Speaker 1: hiring assistant take on the bites when anyone listening if

815
00:44:19,440 --> 00:44:23,520
Speaker 1: you want to get a stunt double, I mean, I

816
00:44:23,280 --> 00:44:26,440
Speaker 1: I just don't know. I get the helping people, I

817
00:44:26,560 --> 00:44:30,239
Speaker 1: understand that, but I like just got sweaty hearing about it. Oh,

818
00:44:30,360 --> 00:44:32,239
Speaker 1: I just I don't think I could just stick my

819
00:44:32,320 --> 00:44:35,680
Speaker 1: arm out and know that it's coming. Yeah, there's no way.

820
00:44:35,960 --> 00:44:37,920
Speaker 1: You've got to dig deep. But you know what you do.

821
00:44:38,000 --> 00:44:40,440
Speaker 1: Both of us getting bitten and stung by every animal,

822
00:44:40,600 --> 00:44:42,480
Speaker 1: one of us goes first, one of us goes second.

823
00:44:42,640 --> 00:44:45,520
Speaker 1: How do you choose, Well, we choose by who's more

824
00:44:45,600 --> 00:44:48,799
Speaker 1: scared goes first. Oh, that's that's a good idea. It

825
00:44:48,840 --> 00:44:50,960
Speaker 1: kind of does you disservice because you're scared and you

826
00:44:50,960 --> 00:44:53,640
Speaker 1: have to go first, so that's terrifying. And then the

827
00:44:53,680 --> 00:44:56,400
Speaker 1: second person who wasn't as scared sees how bad it

828
00:44:56,480 --> 00:45:00,840
Speaker 1: was for the first guy, and then he has going

829
00:45:00,960 --> 00:45:04,360
Speaker 1: second is the worst, believe it or not, especially with

830
00:45:04,400 --> 00:45:06,239
Speaker 1: a bad bite. You just see the person suffering for

831
00:45:06,280 --> 00:45:07,960
Speaker 1: an hour and then he's like, Okay, I think I'm

832
00:45:07,960 --> 00:45:11,320
Speaker 1: ready to sting you now, are you ready? And since

833
00:45:11,800 --> 00:45:16,000
Speaker 1: you were younger, did you always have this curiosity? Um, yes,

834
00:45:16,120 --> 00:45:17,800
Speaker 1: you know you get bitten stung by stuff as a

835
00:45:17,800 --> 00:45:20,359
Speaker 1: little nature kid running around all the time. But maybe

836
00:45:20,400 --> 00:45:22,080
Speaker 1: ten or fifteen years ago I got a job at

837
00:45:22,080 --> 00:45:24,880
Speaker 1: a reptile store and as part of the audition for

838
00:45:24,920 --> 00:45:26,960
Speaker 1: that job, I had to get bitten by a giant

839
00:45:27,120 --> 00:45:30,239
Speaker 1: Tokay gecko and I was like, this thing is gonna

840
00:45:30,280 --> 00:45:36,960
Speaker 1: take a Probably not they got closed down today. They

841
00:45:36,960 --> 00:45:39,359
Speaker 1: didn't do that. At the I Heart interview when I

842
00:45:39,760 --> 00:45:41,919
Speaker 1: for my podcast, they were like, you have to see

843
00:45:42,000 --> 00:45:43,760
Speaker 1: if you're going to get I mean, that is crazy.

844
00:45:43,920 --> 00:45:50,560
Speaker 1: Get some gecks if you want. Wow, I just can't

845
00:45:50,680 --> 00:45:55,920
Speaker 1: even I can't even imagine. And then so for the listener,

846
00:45:56,040 --> 00:45:59,880
Speaker 1: if they do have a fear of snakes or fire

847
00:46:00,080 --> 00:46:04,400
Speaker 1: urchins or scorpion, fish or bullet answer any of these things.

848
00:46:05,200 --> 00:46:07,480
Speaker 1: What should they do? Well? All I can give is

849
00:46:07,520 --> 00:46:10,600
Speaker 1: my advice on how I got over ragnophobia. And I

850
00:46:10,719 --> 00:46:12,960
Speaker 1: was sick and tired of flipping over rocks looking for

851
00:46:13,000 --> 00:46:15,319
Speaker 1: snakes that I loved, and then it'll be a big, fat,

852
00:46:15,360 --> 00:46:18,440
Speaker 1: freaking trantula or something there, and just I'm getting the

853
00:46:18,480 --> 00:46:21,760
Speaker 1: chills right now. Even so, I couldn't look at books

854
00:46:22,000 --> 00:46:24,600
Speaker 1: with trans so I started just putting my hand on

855
00:46:24,640 --> 00:46:28,319
Speaker 1: a book and and just praying, like God, it's not

856
00:46:28,360 --> 00:46:31,040
Speaker 1: a real spider I was. I was that terrified. And

857
00:46:31,080 --> 00:46:33,200
Speaker 1: then over time I started seeing spires in the wild

858
00:46:33,200 --> 00:46:34,759
Speaker 1: and I started touching them. You don't have to go

859
00:46:34,800 --> 00:46:37,960
Speaker 1: to that level, but just look at it. Looking is

860
00:46:38,080 --> 00:46:40,839
Speaker 1: very difficult getting out and you'll see when you watch

861
00:46:40,920 --> 00:46:43,560
Speaker 1: this show. Then these animals are coming after us, with

862
00:46:43,680 --> 00:46:46,799
Speaker 1: the exception of the hippos. That's another story, Oh my gosh. Yeah,

863
00:46:46,920 --> 00:46:49,680
Speaker 1: But it's when we started trying to catch them or

864
00:46:50,280 --> 00:46:53,080
Speaker 1: or grabbing them, that's when they hurt you. So if

865
00:46:53,120 --> 00:46:57,080
Speaker 1: somebody's out hiking or you're out in nature, don't go

866
00:46:57,239 --> 00:46:59,840
Speaker 1: trying to touch wild animals. They're there for a re

867
00:47:00,040 --> 00:47:03,800
Speaker 1: and leave them alone. Don't insta story. The mountain lion

868
00:47:04,920 --> 00:47:08,920
Speaker 1: maybe with a boomerang would look really good now, might

869
00:47:08,920 --> 00:47:12,440
Speaker 1: be worth it. But people are scared of rattlesnakes when

870
00:47:12,440 --> 00:47:14,319
Speaker 1: they're hiking on running canyon here in l A and

871
00:47:14,360 --> 00:47:18,000
Speaker 1: stuff um and they freak out. These things are not

872
00:47:18,120 --> 00:47:20,239
Speaker 1: that fast. If you stand ten feet away and can't

873
00:47:20,239 --> 00:47:23,239
Speaker 1: out run a rattlesnake, you probably shouldn't be jogging if

874
00:47:23,239 --> 00:47:26,440
Speaker 1: they're so easy. The danger is they're so camouflaged that

875
00:47:26,480 --> 00:47:28,000
Speaker 1: you step on them. But if you watch me are

876
00:47:28,040 --> 00:47:30,080
Speaker 1: going on the trails, you're fine. Well, I grew up

877
00:47:30,120 --> 00:47:32,360
Speaker 1: in the South and I was taught there was like

878
00:47:32,400 --> 00:47:35,120
Speaker 1: alligators or crocodile, I don't know the difference, but whatever,

879
00:47:35,520 --> 00:47:37,440
Speaker 1: there were those things and they would come out, and

880
00:47:37,480 --> 00:47:40,600
Speaker 1: we were taught as kids that if one starts chasing you,

881
00:47:41,040 --> 00:47:42,839
Speaker 1: that you have to run, but you have to zig

882
00:47:42,920 --> 00:47:46,719
Speaker 1: zag because apparently then they tried to zig zag and

883
00:47:46,760 --> 00:47:48,600
Speaker 1: then they have these big bodies. Was that like an

884
00:47:48,600 --> 00:47:51,239
Speaker 1: old wives tailor? Is that the truth? Like? Was I

885
00:47:51,400 --> 00:47:55,360
Speaker 1: zig zag running my whole childhood for no reason? I

886
00:47:55,480 --> 00:47:57,920
Speaker 1: think it's not that true. I've heard. I've heard arguments

887
00:47:57,920 --> 00:48:00,640
Speaker 1: of us. Well, here's the alligators strike really well to

888
00:48:00,680 --> 00:48:02,640
Speaker 1: the side and sit to the front. So when you

889
00:48:02,680 --> 00:48:06,040
Speaker 1: start zigzag and you're kind of lying yourself right now,

890
00:48:06,080 --> 00:48:09,400
Speaker 1: I was lied to. That is what they told us.

891
00:48:09,480 --> 00:48:11,880
Speaker 1: Even when we're on horseback, they're like, just keep it going,

892
00:48:12,000 --> 00:48:15,160
Speaker 1: but go like in the zig zag motion. Who who

893
00:48:15,200 --> 00:48:17,640
Speaker 1: started that? And who starts these rumors? Oh my gosh,

894
00:48:17,640 --> 00:48:20,920
Speaker 1: I don't know. They are rampant. There's nothing like dangerous

895
00:48:20,920 --> 00:48:24,160
Speaker 1: animals to start rumors that people will just believe right away.

896
00:48:24,520 --> 00:48:27,399
Speaker 1: Somebody looked it up. Yeah, I was dead sure that

897
00:48:27,400 --> 00:48:29,800
Speaker 1: that was correct information. Looking at you, I felt confident.

898
00:48:30,360 --> 00:48:32,719
Speaker 1: If you told them you didn't believe it anymore, they

899
00:48:32,760 --> 00:48:36,799
Speaker 1: would probably disown you. I'm going to have to do

900
00:48:36,840 --> 00:48:40,320
Speaker 1: some additional research on this topic. Oh my gosh. You know,

901
00:48:40,800 --> 00:48:44,840
Speaker 1: we always get like a mountain lion is spotted in

902
00:48:44,880 --> 00:48:47,200
Speaker 1: the area in the neighborhood, we'll get an email that

903
00:48:47,280 --> 00:48:50,320
Speaker 1: says things you should do if you come in contact

904
00:48:50,360 --> 00:48:52,600
Speaker 1: with the mountain lion, And the first one is always

905
00:48:53,120 --> 00:48:59,520
Speaker 1: make yourself appear bigger, how eat and what do you

906
00:48:59,560 --> 00:49:01,719
Speaker 1: meet like at your hands? Do you wanna what do

907
00:49:01,760 --> 00:49:04,240
Speaker 1: you do when you come in contact with a wild

908
00:49:04,320 --> 00:49:06,759
Speaker 1: animal like that, Well, it's something I predator like that

909
00:49:06,800 --> 00:49:08,440
Speaker 1: you want to look at in the eye. You might

910
00:49:08,640 --> 00:49:11,120
Speaker 1: not want to do that with animal who's defensive, But

911
00:49:11,200 --> 00:49:13,799
Speaker 1: how do you know if it's defensive or not? Good

912
00:49:13,880 --> 00:49:16,440
Speaker 1: luck now with with a mountain lion, look big, look

913
00:49:16,480 --> 00:49:18,960
Speaker 1: in the eye, mountain lion. It's it's smart enough to

914
00:49:19,000 --> 00:49:20,920
Speaker 1: know that. You know, you're kind of tall. Maybe you

915
00:49:20,960 --> 00:49:23,400
Speaker 1: could hurt me. Um, And so if you're looking the

916
00:49:23,440 --> 00:49:25,759
Speaker 1: eye like I'm ready to throw down, they're not going

917
00:49:25,800 --> 00:49:27,680
Speaker 1: to mess with you and put your arms up way

918
00:49:27,800 --> 00:49:30,680
Speaker 1: make noise. They're terrified. You know, we we walk on

919
00:49:30,719 --> 00:49:33,279
Speaker 1: two feet, which so animals think we're way bigger than

920
00:49:33,320 --> 00:49:35,719
Speaker 1: we really are. Well, I know coyotes aren't scared of

921
00:49:35,760 --> 00:49:37,719
Speaker 1: me because they get in fights or they're trying to

922
00:49:37,719 --> 00:49:39,680
Speaker 1: eat each I don't know what they're doing, but they're

923
00:49:39,800 --> 00:49:41,279
Speaker 1: very loud in the middle of the night. I live

924
00:49:41,360 --> 00:49:43,799
Speaker 1: in the in the hills, and so they will be

925
00:49:43,840 --> 00:49:45,680
Speaker 1: going at it. And sometimes I'm like, we are trying

926
00:49:45,719 --> 00:49:48,520
Speaker 1: to sleep around here. So I'm like, hey, they don't care,

927
00:49:51,200 --> 00:49:54,440
Speaker 1: they don't stop. I mean, if they're trying, like going

928
00:49:54,480 --> 00:49:57,239
Speaker 1: after something, that will be hours of them just screaming

929
00:49:57,280 --> 00:49:59,359
Speaker 1: at the top of their lungs and I'm like, there's

930
00:49:59,360 --> 00:50:01,520
Speaker 1: nothing that's gonna stop this thing. I'll try to whistle.

931
00:50:02,120 --> 00:50:06,279
Speaker 1: They don't care. Nothing works out now. They're urban coyotes.

932
00:50:06,680 --> 00:50:12,240
Speaker 1: They're like, yeah, go back to bed. Try Oh my gosh, Okay,

933
00:50:12,480 --> 00:50:14,880
Speaker 1: you guys have to tune in The King of Pain

934
00:50:14,960 --> 00:50:18,879
Speaker 1: Airs Tuesday's ten nine Central on the History Channel. Thank

935
00:50:18,920 --> 00:50:21,400
Speaker 1: you so much for coming, Rob, We appreciate it. Thanks

936
00:50:21,400 --> 00:50:34,160
Speaker 1: for having me. Wow, So it's Halloween wake. That's the

937
00:50:34,200 --> 00:50:37,440
Speaker 1: impetus for this fear topic. Seems kind of appropriate. Um,

938
00:50:37,480 --> 00:50:39,520
Speaker 1: there's a lot of fears when you're living in southern California.

939
00:50:39,560 --> 00:50:41,480
Speaker 1: We mentioned that earlier. How some are worse in l

940
00:50:41,480 --> 00:50:43,480
Speaker 1: A than others. And one is the fear of brush

941
00:50:43,520 --> 00:50:47,040
Speaker 1: fires because they are constant. And Katie Burr was supposed

942
00:50:47,080 --> 00:50:49,319
Speaker 1: to be here in studio, but she is stuck on

943
00:50:49,360 --> 00:50:51,840
Speaker 1: the four or five freeway because of these fires. Katie,

944
00:50:51,840 --> 00:50:58,480
Speaker 1: are you there, I'm here where abouts? I'm actually, oh,

945
00:50:58,520 --> 00:51:02,160
Speaker 1: you're down your south down there, but step bad. Yeah,

946
00:51:02,200 --> 00:51:04,960
Speaker 1: there's been a lot of traffic today. Yeah, the whole

947
00:51:04,960 --> 00:51:07,080
Speaker 1: city is a wreck right now because of these fires.

948
00:51:07,120 --> 00:51:11,200
Speaker 1: It really is in the traffic being diverted everywhere is

949
00:51:11,280 --> 00:51:15,560
Speaker 1: just making it congested everywhere. I know, even getting here,

950
00:51:16,000 --> 00:51:18,520
Speaker 1: I think because so many schools were closed last minute

951
00:51:18,560 --> 00:51:22,239
Speaker 1: as well, that you know, everybody's taking alternate roots, and

952
00:51:22,280 --> 00:51:23,960
Speaker 1: the people that have to get to work, they're like,

953
00:51:24,000 --> 00:51:25,600
Speaker 1: what am I going to do with my kids? Because

954
00:51:25,600 --> 00:51:28,360
Speaker 1: even if they're not affected in the fires, they don't

955
00:51:28,360 --> 00:51:32,000
Speaker 1: have childcare right, So it's just adding such a dynamic.

956
00:51:32,080 --> 00:51:36,880
Speaker 1: But thank you for calling in. Uh. I have to

957
00:51:36,920 --> 00:51:42,200
Speaker 1: be completely transparent that I'm a little bit of a

958
00:51:42,280 --> 00:51:46,600
Speaker 1: skeptic when it comes to the paranormal, unlike um gin here.

959
00:51:46,920 --> 00:51:49,920
Speaker 1: Who what have you recently just done? Well, I've had

960
00:51:49,960 --> 00:51:54,200
Speaker 1: to have my house cleansed by a professional twice. I'm

961
00:51:54,239 --> 00:51:59,719
Speaker 1: talking professional professionals speaking like straight from Egypt, speaking Arabic

962
00:51:59,800 --> 00:52:03,640
Speaker 1: and burning all kinds of different incense and making me

963
00:52:03,719 --> 00:52:08,880
Speaker 1: jump over a fire pot three times. And what do

964
00:52:08,920 --> 00:52:11,960
Speaker 1: you think of this behavior, Katie, let's jump right into it. Well,

965
00:52:12,000 --> 00:52:15,399
Speaker 1: what's going on at your house? Okay? So when I

966
00:52:15,480 --> 00:52:19,239
Speaker 1: was pregnant, which was eight years ago, I woke up

967
00:52:19,280 --> 00:52:22,040
Speaker 1: in the middle of the night because I felt somebody

968
00:52:22,120 --> 00:52:25,360
Speaker 1: staring at me and I looked over. I know, I

969
00:52:25,440 --> 00:52:29,400
Speaker 1: woke up. It was not dreaming. I saw an older

970
00:52:29,440 --> 00:52:33,080
Speaker 1: man looking down on me. He was standing right next

971
00:52:33,080 --> 00:52:38,680
Speaker 1: to the bed. And I just froze and said nothing

972
00:52:38,800 --> 00:52:42,120
Speaker 1: and didn't move and closed my eyes because I was like,

973
00:52:42,320 --> 00:52:45,080
Speaker 1: I don't need I just can't. I just I don't

974
00:52:45,080 --> 00:52:47,000
Speaker 1: know what's going on. I knew that it wasn't a

975
00:52:47,040 --> 00:52:51,400
Speaker 1: real person, but that it was some sort of entity

976
00:52:51,560 --> 00:52:55,239
Speaker 1: or familiar to you. He did not look familiar to me,

977
00:52:55,760 --> 00:52:58,719
Speaker 1: but he looked like Baseball era, like old, like he

978
00:52:58,760 --> 00:53:02,400
Speaker 1: had like had you just much of their own No, no,

979
00:53:02,640 --> 00:53:12,560
Speaker 1: so cuts. So the next day I called Aster. Her

980
00:53:12,600 --> 00:53:15,600
Speaker 1: name's Ester. How did you find her? Um through a

981
00:53:15,640 --> 00:53:20,880
Speaker 1: referral bag. So Esther comes over, she cleanses the house.

982
00:53:21,040 --> 00:53:23,160
Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure everything is okay, but you know what

983
00:53:23,280 --> 00:53:27,200
Speaker 1: she says at the end, she goes, oh my gosh. Well,

984
00:53:27,200 --> 00:53:29,880
Speaker 1: she kept walking into my bedroom and the whole flame

985
00:53:29,960 --> 00:53:33,759
Speaker 1: would go out on this mixture that she had, and

986
00:53:33,800 --> 00:53:36,759
Speaker 1: she said, something's wrong in here. She said she'd go

987
00:53:36,800 --> 00:53:39,719
Speaker 1: out and light it, come back in flame would go out.

988
00:53:41,960 --> 00:53:44,319
Speaker 1: I know it was really Also, my marriage was like

989
00:53:44,440 --> 00:53:46,680
Speaker 1: really ending or you know, so I was like, oh,

990
00:53:46,680 --> 00:53:48,800
Speaker 1: it must be the marriage must say. All of a sudden,

991
00:53:48,800 --> 00:53:51,560
Speaker 1: she goes, there is an old man in this house,

992
00:53:52,920 --> 00:53:56,120
Speaker 1: and he is we need to get rid of him.

993
00:53:56,200 --> 00:54:00,520
Speaker 1: So she did that and then nothing. Everything was great.

994
00:54:01,200 --> 00:54:05,680
Speaker 1: The house felt like fresh and airy and clear and everything.

995
00:54:05,719 --> 00:54:08,240
Speaker 1: And then my son was about two and a half

996
00:54:08,760 --> 00:54:11,319
Speaker 1: and he started pointing into a back room all the

997
00:54:11,400 --> 00:54:17,160
Speaker 1: time and he would say ghost. He'd say, who is that?

998
00:54:17,920 --> 00:54:21,040
Speaker 1: And I was like, Oh my god, esther come get

999
00:54:21,080 --> 00:54:23,719
Speaker 1: the ghost out? So I think we have another one.

1000
00:54:24,719 --> 00:54:27,600
Speaker 1: I do Katie's not because she's a ghost there. Maybe

1001
00:54:27,600 --> 00:54:30,160
Speaker 1: she does a ghost, but she actually spent two weeks

1002
00:54:30,920 --> 00:54:32,520
Speaker 1: in an asylum that is said to be one of

1003
00:54:32,560 --> 00:54:34,400
Speaker 1: the most haunted places in America. So it was it

1004
00:54:34,440 --> 00:54:37,759
Speaker 1: fair to say that you are a believer. Oh, I'm

1005
00:54:37,760 --> 00:54:39,719
Speaker 1: definitely a believer. I mean I have a little bit

1006
00:54:39,719 --> 00:54:42,200
Speaker 1: of skepticism because I mean, you just have to you know,

1007
00:54:42,400 --> 00:54:44,960
Speaker 1: you can't just go full into this stuff. And you know,

1008
00:54:45,520 --> 00:54:50,319
Speaker 1: we all tried to disprove it first, because if you can,

1009
00:54:50,440 --> 00:54:52,880
Speaker 1: you know, if you can't disprove it, then you know

1010
00:54:52,960 --> 00:54:55,520
Speaker 1: that you're onto something. So it's good to have a

1011
00:54:55,520 --> 00:54:58,680
Speaker 1: little bit of skepticism. But after Penhurst, I mean I

1012
00:54:59,000 --> 00:55:02,439
Speaker 1: was a believer before, Uh, Penhurst, definitely it was next

1013
00:55:02,520 --> 00:55:06,280
Speaker 1: level for me. Can you tell us about your experience there?

1014
00:55:07,800 --> 00:55:11,440
Speaker 1: You know, it honestly was something that I just wasn't expecting.

1015
00:55:11,600 --> 00:55:14,239
Speaker 1: I you know, I went into there and um, you know,

1016
00:55:14,280 --> 00:55:16,840
Speaker 1: I've I've been investigating for about ten years now, so

1017
00:55:17,360 --> 00:55:19,680
Speaker 1: you know, I feel like I've seen it all. But

1018
00:55:19,920 --> 00:55:24,080
Speaker 1: when I went to Pinhurst, it was just unexpected experiences

1019
00:55:24,120 --> 00:55:27,440
Speaker 1: that honestly, I would have to say were life changing.

1020
00:55:27,480 --> 00:55:29,120
Speaker 1: I think it was life changing for all of us.

1021
00:55:29,600 --> 00:55:33,520
Speaker 1: I think it made us all reevaluate ourselves as investigators

1022
00:55:33,600 --> 00:55:38,320
Speaker 1: and just um, you know my take personally on protecting myself,

1023
00:55:38,360 --> 00:55:41,960
Speaker 1: that's a big thing. I didn't really take that seriously before,

1024
00:55:42,560 --> 00:55:45,640
Speaker 1: and you know, going to Pinhurst and kind of experiencing

1025
00:55:45,719 --> 00:55:49,000
Speaker 1: just the darker side of things, I really started to

1026
00:55:49,000 --> 00:55:51,080
Speaker 1: realize this is something that you don't play with and

1027
00:55:51,160 --> 00:55:53,120
Speaker 1: you really need to go in there and just kind

1028
00:55:53,120 --> 00:55:55,160
Speaker 1: of take a little bit more seriously, even if it's

1029
00:55:55,200 --> 00:56:01,279
Speaker 1: just taking authority. And so in that pla nation of

1030
00:56:01,320 --> 00:56:05,120
Speaker 1: what we can watch, Um on Annie, it says that

1031
00:56:05,400 --> 00:56:11,200
Speaker 1: some of you experienced physical attacks and saw full body operations.

1032
00:56:11,480 --> 00:56:15,800
Speaker 1: Can you explain that to us, so I didn't actually happen.

1033
00:56:16,000 --> 00:56:18,719
Speaker 1: Um So, Funny enough, we have a huge skeptic on

1034
00:56:18,760 --> 00:56:22,560
Speaker 1: our team, so Max is our he's our geologist, and

1035
00:56:22,680 --> 00:56:26,240
Speaker 1: he's very, very skeptable, and uh it was really fun

1036
00:56:26,320 --> 00:56:30,239
Speaker 1: for me personally to watch him have his first experiences. Um.

1037
00:56:30,280 --> 00:56:32,680
Speaker 1: I was actually uh you know, sitting next to him

1038
00:56:32,680 --> 00:56:35,879
Speaker 1: for a couple of them. So you know, I don't

1039
00:56:35,880 --> 00:56:37,879
Speaker 1: know if he will admit that he's a bloater at

1040
00:56:37,880 --> 00:56:42,279
Speaker 1: this point, but he definitely has questions. UM So that

1041
00:56:42,280 --> 00:56:45,600
Speaker 1: that was really just a fun experience. But uh, you know,

1042
00:56:45,680 --> 00:56:47,480
Speaker 1: other than that, you know, we did have some pretty

1043
00:56:47,520 --> 00:56:52,160
Speaker 1: dark experiences there, and um, you know, obviously I can't

1044
00:56:52,200 --> 00:56:55,840
Speaker 1: give too much away, but um it's it's something like

1045
00:56:55,880 --> 00:56:58,399
Speaker 1: I was saying that it definitely changed even my view

1046
00:56:58,440 --> 00:57:00,520
Speaker 1: and I've I've been around this stuff, you know, I've

1047
00:57:00,560 --> 00:57:04,160
Speaker 1: I've been around um you know, darker energy for for

1048
00:57:04,280 --> 00:57:08,040
Speaker 1: quite some time. But um it was just really unexpected

1049
00:57:08,360 --> 00:57:12,799
Speaker 1: and um it really just it made me, uh just

1050
00:57:12,880 --> 00:57:17,480
Speaker 1: rethink how to handle things. Um So, I yeah, seeing

1051
00:57:17,520 --> 00:57:20,640
Speaker 1: like cool bodied operations like that, I mean it it

1052
00:57:20,720 --> 00:57:23,680
Speaker 1: throws you off, you know for sure. Could it be

1053
00:57:23,800 --> 00:57:27,040
Speaker 1: almost like a placebo effect? Though? Like you see it

1054
00:57:27,120 --> 00:57:29,440
Speaker 1: happen to one person, you know, like somebody's like, oh,

1055
00:57:29,480 --> 00:57:31,360
Speaker 1: if you take this medicine, then you'll feel better. And

1056
00:57:31,360 --> 00:57:33,080
Speaker 1: then all of a sudden you take what you think

1057
00:57:33,200 --> 00:57:35,120
Speaker 1: is the Thailand all but really it's just a vitamin.

1058
00:57:35,160 --> 00:57:37,520
Speaker 1: You're like, oh, my headache is gone. Could it be

1059
00:57:37,600 --> 00:57:42,160
Speaker 1: something like that? Um, you don't. You You might think that,

1060
00:57:42,200 --> 00:57:44,160
Speaker 1: you know, you might think going into a place like that,

1061
00:57:44,240 --> 00:57:46,240
Speaker 1: oh it's ominous walking and you know, you think you're

1062
00:57:46,280 --> 00:57:48,360
Speaker 1: gonna sell all this stuff. But to be honest with you,

1063
00:57:48,480 --> 00:57:50,640
Speaker 1: just from my perspective, I mean I went in there

1064
00:57:50,640 --> 00:57:53,080
Speaker 1: thinking this is just like any other place that I've been.

1065
00:57:53,080 --> 00:57:55,960
Speaker 1: And I mean it's it's definitely a huge campus. It's

1066
00:57:55,960 --> 00:57:58,320
Speaker 1: a hundred and ten acres um. You know, it's it's

1067
00:57:58,320 --> 00:58:00,880
Speaker 1: really spread out, and the building are you know, really

1068
00:58:00,880 --> 00:58:04,600
Speaker 1: creepy looking. But I just really didn't feel like I

1069
00:58:04,640 --> 00:58:07,560
Speaker 1: was going to experience anything different there than any of

1070
00:58:07,600 --> 00:58:09,440
Speaker 1: the other places that I've gone. I thought it might

1071
00:58:09,480 --> 00:58:12,360
Speaker 1: just be in a larger scale. Um so, you know,

1072
00:58:12,480 --> 00:58:15,160
Speaker 1: not really looking for that and finding the things that

1073
00:58:15,200 --> 00:58:18,400
Speaker 1: we found, Um, I can't say that that was something

1074
00:58:18,440 --> 00:58:21,440
Speaker 1: that you know I went in looking for. Did you

1075
00:58:21,520 --> 00:58:25,960
Speaker 1: all stick together or were you alone at times? And

1076
00:58:26,040 --> 00:58:28,680
Speaker 1: what about the crew? I mean, you guys were used

1077
00:58:28,720 --> 00:58:34,919
Speaker 1: to this, but was were the crews terrified? Um? Yeah,

1078
00:58:34,920 --> 00:58:37,960
Speaker 1: A couple of people hadn't ever had experiences before, so

1079
00:58:38,480 --> 00:58:40,760
Speaker 1: much like much like Max, it was fun to watch

1080
00:58:40,800 --> 00:58:44,439
Speaker 1: them as well. But we were instructed actually when we

1081
00:58:44,600 --> 00:58:47,000
Speaker 1: showed up at Penhurst to kind of stay in groups

1082
00:58:47,040 --> 00:58:49,160
Speaker 1: that as things used to go off by yourself. So

1083
00:58:49,440 --> 00:58:51,920
Speaker 1: I think that kind of added to the creepiness right away,

1084
00:58:52,000 --> 00:58:54,040
Speaker 1: you know, because you don't know what talks back then.

1085
00:58:54,480 --> 00:58:57,640
Speaker 1: I mean, honestly, stepping onto the grounds there, I didn't

1086
00:58:57,680 --> 00:58:59,680
Speaker 1: want to be by myself, like I wanted to keep

1087
00:59:00,040 --> 00:59:02,120
Speaker 1: of my team around like we had the buddy system,

1088
00:59:02,360 --> 00:59:05,800
Speaker 1: um kind of walking around there. Um. So yeah, I

1089
00:59:05,840 --> 00:59:09,360
Speaker 1: mean it was definitely fore voting atmosphere. Are there certain

1090
00:59:09,440 --> 00:59:14,640
Speaker 1: days that paranormal activity really hits? Like? Is there anything

1091
00:59:14,640 --> 00:59:17,360
Speaker 1: around Halloween that the listeners need to be worried about?

1092
00:59:18,440 --> 00:59:20,640
Speaker 1: I think that might be the Poscemo effect. I mean,

1093
00:59:20,680 --> 00:59:27,160
Speaker 1: we're right, Um, it's really it's not the day. It's more. Um,

1094
00:59:27,200 --> 00:59:29,880
Speaker 1: I know people talk with a witchy hour and you know,

1095
00:59:29,920 --> 00:59:33,160
Speaker 1: I I've kind of noticed that in my experienced um

1096
00:59:33,200 --> 00:59:35,040
Speaker 1: that you know, things do kind of pick up around

1097
00:59:35,440 --> 00:59:38,680
Speaker 1: three am, but not always. I mean I've had experiences

1098
00:59:38,760 --> 00:59:41,400
Speaker 1: during the day, you know, ronty light when you're not

1099
00:59:41,440 --> 00:59:44,200
Speaker 1: expecting it, and uh, you know it's not like, oh

1100
00:59:44,240 --> 00:59:47,200
Speaker 1: it's Tuesday at like three o'clock, everything's gonna happen today.

1101
00:59:47,240 --> 00:59:49,960
Speaker 1: You know, it's it's pretty random. I think it depends

1102
00:59:50,000 --> 00:59:52,680
Speaker 1: on you know what I believe. You know, it goes

1103
00:59:52,960 --> 00:59:55,800
Speaker 1: the energy to manifest, So I think it really depends

1104
00:59:55,840 --> 00:59:58,160
Speaker 1: on the environment. It depends on what energy is there

1105
00:59:58,160 --> 01:00:00,560
Speaker 1: for for them to feed off of. Can you explain

1106
01:00:00,600 --> 01:00:03,600
Speaker 1: that a little bit more? Ghosts need energy to manifest?

1107
01:00:03,680 --> 01:00:07,840
Speaker 1: So our energy, well, I mean we're all energy. You know,

1108
01:00:07,880 --> 01:00:11,160
Speaker 1: everything around us is energy. So um, you know they

1109
01:00:11,160 --> 01:00:14,720
Speaker 1: say energy cannot be created or destroyed, so when we die,

1110
01:00:15,000 --> 01:00:17,480
Speaker 1: I mean they're still energy there. You know, your spirit

1111
01:00:17,560 --> 01:00:21,080
Speaker 1: is energy. So uh, you know, you feel it's basically

1112
01:00:21,440 --> 01:00:24,960
Speaker 1: need um, some sort of energy to feed off of

1113
01:00:25,120 --> 01:00:28,560
Speaker 1: two kind of you know, manifest in whatever way, if

1114
01:00:28,600 --> 01:00:31,880
Speaker 1: it's a shadow figure or a full body apparition, Um,

1115
01:00:32,240 --> 01:00:35,360
Speaker 1: maybe just noise that you hear. Uh. You know, they

1116
01:00:35,400 --> 01:00:38,200
Speaker 1: definitely feed off of their environment and and us as well.

1117
01:00:39,040 --> 01:00:41,560
Speaker 1: What are some of the signs that an energy is

1118
01:00:41,600 --> 01:00:46,520
Speaker 1: around you. I mean there's so many You can you know,

1119
01:00:46,640 --> 01:00:50,880
Speaker 1: hear disembodied voices that you can you know, maybe feel

1120
01:00:50,920 --> 01:00:54,840
Speaker 1: touched or just you know, if you're more sensitive, you

1121
01:00:54,840 --> 01:00:56,960
Speaker 1: know something that I'm kind of realizing that I am.

1122
01:00:57,440 --> 01:01:00,960
Speaker 1: You can just feel presence around you sometimes. And do

1123
01:01:01,000 --> 01:01:06,160
Speaker 1: you think children are able to just because they they

1124
01:01:06,800 --> 01:01:10,880
Speaker 1: still believe in the magic of what am I trying

1125
01:01:10,880 --> 01:01:14,200
Speaker 1: to say? It's like they can they believe in they

1126
01:01:14,240 --> 01:01:17,840
Speaker 1: have magic or well they have magical thinking, are they

1127
01:01:17,880 --> 01:01:22,040
Speaker 1: Are they more apt to see a ghost because they're

1128
01:01:22,080 --> 01:01:24,560
Speaker 1: not like, oh no, that was you know, oh that

1129
01:01:24,680 --> 01:01:27,440
Speaker 1: was the pots and pans that just you know, fell

1130
01:01:27,640 --> 01:01:30,640
Speaker 1: in the cupboard or something like that, like we would say,

1131
01:01:31,040 --> 01:01:33,080
Speaker 1: you know, that is something I actually believe because I

1132
01:01:33,080 --> 01:01:36,000
Speaker 1: think as we get older, we start still turning things about,

1133
01:01:36,080 --> 01:01:38,560
Speaker 1: you know, as we get into adulthood. Uh, you know,

1134
01:01:38,680 --> 01:01:41,480
Speaker 1: you start going into the kind of like societal norms

1135
01:01:41,520 --> 01:01:45,520
Speaker 1: where you know it's not appropriate to you know, have

1136
01:01:45,640 --> 01:01:49,720
Speaker 1: your imaginary friend or um, you know, to to experience

1137
01:01:49,800 --> 01:01:53,680
Speaker 1: certain things. So I think kids are kind of unstilled still,

1138
01:01:53,800 --> 01:01:57,880
Speaker 1: you know, and uh, they they don't they don't still

1139
01:01:57,880 --> 01:01:59,720
Speaker 1: do that stuff out there kind of you know still

1140
01:01:59,760 --> 01:02:02,560
Speaker 1: it's you're like what you said, like the magic around them,

1141
01:02:02,600 --> 01:02:05,880
Speaker 1: like they kind of still play into that, right. So

1142
01:02:06,200 --> 01:02:09,040
Speaker 1: is there like one of can you tell us a

1143
01:02:09,120 --> 01:02:12,440
Speaker 1: little more about maybe a place that you investigated in

1144
01:02:12,520 --> 01:02:16,280
Speaker 1: the past and some of the some of the experiences

1145
01:02:16,360 --> 01:02:19,760
Speaker 1: that you had there since we're going to save the

1146
01:02:19,800 --> 01:02:25,280
Speaker 1: asylum for our viewing pleasure, definitely it's worth the way.

1147
01:02:25,720 --> 01:02:29,000
Speaker 1: Um yeah, I uh So the craziest place that I

1148
01:02:29,040 --> 01:02:32,320
Speaker 1: had been to before Penhurst, um was actually a place

1149
01:02:32,400 --> 01:02:34,960
Speaker 1: in Pennsylvania I did when I was on Ghost Lab.

1150
01:02:35,400 --> 01:02:38,480
Speaker 1: And it was called Hillview Manor, and um it was

1151
01:02:39,160 --> 01:02:42,440
Speaker 1: it's an old kind of abandoned hospital. Um or just

1152
01:02:42,600 --> 01:02:45,360
Speaker 1: it was really like a home for the four uh

1153
01:02:45,440 --> 01:02:47,560
Speaker 1: but it's just it's got the things that a creepy

1154
01:02:47,600 --> 01:02:50,200
Speaker 1: factor that pan Hurst has on a slightly you know,

1155
01:02:50,280 --> 01:02:53,960
Speaker 1: smaller scale. And um that was the first place, you know,

1156
01:02:53,960 --> 01:02:56,840
Speaker 1: when when I did Ghost Lab, I wasn't really more

1157
01:02:56,920 --> 01:02:59,440
Speaker 1: in channel with my side the way that I am

1158
01:02:59,480 --> 01:03:02,600
Speaker 1: now for whatever reason, but um, you know, I I

1159
01:03:02,640 --> 01:03:05,160
Speaker 1: walked in that place, and that was the first place

1160
01:03:05,200 --> 01:03:07,600
Speaker 1: I could honestly say I walked in and I could

1161
01:03:07,600 --> 01:03:10,280
Speaker 1: just feel the energy. I could just feel the heaviness

1162
01:03:10,320 --> 01:03:13,680
Speaker 1: walking in there. Um. So it kind of prepared me

1163
01:03:13,720 --> 01:03:17,200
Speaker 1: for Penhurst in a lot of ways. But one of

1164
01:03:17,200 --> 01:03:19,440
Speaker 1: the things that happened while we were there, I was

1165
01:03:19,880 --> 01:03:21,760
Speaker 1: I was kind of the ghost state of the team.

1166
01:03:21,880 --> 01:03:24,000
Speaker 1: And they would put me in the in you know,

1167
01:03:24,080 --> 01:03:27,440
Speaker 1: just different places, by myself. And they put me in

1168
01:03:27,520 --> 01:03:31,520
Speaker 1: a basement by myself, and there was a big heavy

1169
01:03:31,560 --> 01:03:33,920
Speaker 1: door that had been propped open. We've been there for

1170
01:03:34,040 --> 01:03:37,360
Speaker 1: three days and the thing hadn't much and I was,

1171
01:03:37,480 --> 01:03:39,880
Speaker 1: you know, sitting down there in this old creepy wheelchair,

1172
01:03:40,280 --> 01:03:42,479
Speaker 1: and I had my video camera pointed at the door,

1173
01:03:42,720 --> 01:03:45,360
Speaker 1: and the door just started closing on a phone right

1174
01:03:45,440 --> 01:03:51,960
Speaker 1: in front of me. Did you scream? What do you do? I? Actually,

1175
01:03:52,000 --> 01:03:55,000
Speaker 1: I'm not a screamer. I I freezed like a deer

1176
01:03:55,000 --> 01:03:57,960
Speaker 1: in headlights. That's kind of my say. So I just

1177
01:03:58,040 --> 01:04:00,280
Speaker 1: throw it, as you know, like I I don't I

1178
01:04:00,280 --> 01:04:01,640
Speaker 1: get scared. I don't want to I don't want to

1179
01:04:01,680 --> 01:04:03,800
Speaker 1: run away. I don't want to make any noises. So

1180
01:04:03,920 --> 01:04:06,479
Speaker 1: I just I froze, and luckily I had my video

1181
01:04:06,560 --> 01:04:09,200
Speaker 1: camera pointed right at the door, so I was actually

1182
01:04:09,240 --> 01:04:12,760
Speaker 1: able to catch it on camera. Wow, I don't think

1183
01:04:12,800 --> 01:04:15,200
Speaker 1: I could be an investigator. You would be getting a

1184
01:04:15,200 --> 01:04:21,080
Speaker 1: lot of cleanses after that. That's important that That's one

1185
01:04:21,080 --> 01:04:23,000
Speaker 1: of the things that pin Hurst kind of taught me

1186
01:04:23,120 --> 01:04:26,280
Speaker 1: is that, you know, that whole protection thing like cleansing yourself.

1187
01:04:26,360 --> 01:04:28,920
Speaker 1: Maybe there's something to that. But we were talking earlier

1188
01:04:28,920 --> 01:04:31,160
Speaker 1: about fear and so much fear in our daily lives,

1189
01:04:31,200 --> 01:04:33,480
Speaker 1: and fear with our kids, and fear everything from spiders

1190
01:04:33,640 --> 01:04:36,240
Speaker 1: to your kid's sickness, your kids out of your sight.

1191
01:04:36,840 --> 01:04:43,320
Speaker 1: When you're in a haunted situation and you're seeing something paranormal,

1192
01:04:43,360 --> 01:04:46,080
Speaker 1: how do you control your fear? Do you have breathing techniques?

1193
01:04:46,120 --> 01:04:48,960
Speaker 1: Like how do you get through that? I think that's

1194
01:04:49,000 --> 01:04:53,400
Speaker 1: something that I'm still teaching myself. Actually, Um, I just

1195
01:04:53,480 --> 01:04:55,600
Speaker 1: try to stay mentally strong. I just try to kind

1196
01:04:55,640 --> 01:04:59,040
Speaker 1: of like talk myself through whatever is going on. I mean, obviously,

1197
01:04:59,080 --> 01:05:02,880
Speaker 1: as an investigator, we're the ones running tour the activity

1198
01:05:02,920 --> 01:05:05,480
Speaker 1: instead of away from it. But I mean, definitely their

1199
01:05:05,520 --> 01:05:08,280
Speaker 1: situations where my fear gets the best of me. You know,

1200
01:05:08,320 --> 01:05:10,440
Speaker 1: when you're not expecting something, which is you know so

1201
01:05:10,520 --> 01:05:13,080
Speaker 1: much of the stuff, and I think it's important just

1202
01:05:13,120 --> 01:05:16,080
Speaker 1: to kind of you know, ground yourself, stay in the

1203
01:05:16,120 --> 01:05:18,440
Speaker 1: moment and just kind of talk yourself through whatever is

1204
01:05:18,440 --> 01:05:21,840
Speaker 1: going on. And if one of your kids says they

1205
01:05:21,880 --> 01:05:24,560
Speaker 1: see something, what is the best way to handle that

1206
01:05:25,000 --> 01:05:27,160
Speaker 1: in response, like, what would you say as a parent

1207
01:05:27,200 --> 01:05:29,840
Speaker 1: to your child if they say, well, I think the

1208
01:05:29,840 --> 01:05:35,080
Speaker 1: most important thing is not to uh, you know, question them,

1209
01:05:35,160 --> 01:05:37,320
Speaker 1: not to to make them feel like they need to

1210
01:05:37,360 --> 01:05:40,640
Speaker 1: question themselves, because I you know, I've talked to already.

1211
01:05:40,640 --> 01:05:45,480
Speaker 1: I think I guess there's so many people that you know,

1212
01:05:45,640 --> 01:05:48,600
Speaker 1: have have grown into adulthood, you know, kind of being

1213
01:05:48,640 --> 01:05:51,200
Speaker 1: ashamed of experiences that they've had, and you know, it's

1214
01:05:51,240 --> 01:05:54,280
Speaker 1: it's kind of traumatizing because they know that they're experiencing it.

1215
01:05:54,320 --> 01:05:57,400
Speaker 1: You know, whether or not you experience it with them,

1216
01:05:57,400 --> 01:06:00,200
Speaker 1: whether or not you actually believe whatever. Captain sable keep

1217
01:06:00,240 --> 01:06:02,120
Speaker 1: it And I think it's important just to really be

1218
01:06:02,200 --> 01:06:06,840
Speaker 1: supportive of that. It just kind of talks in through it. Okay,

1219
01:06:06,920 --> 01:06:08,960
Speaker 1: that was a hard pill for me to swallow, but

1220
01:06:09,120 --> 01:06:12,520
Speaker 1: I'm taking it. Thank you so much, Katie. That was

1221
01:06:12,560 --> 01:06:15,920
Speaker 1: so I everybody should tune in to the world's biggest

1222
01:06:15,960 --> 01:06:21,080
Speaker 1: ghost hunt, Penhurst Asylum. It's it starts October eight p

1223
01:06:21,240 --> 01:06:24,400
Speaker 1: m on Annie. Thank you guys for having me. I

1224
01:06:24,440 --> 01:06:27,480
Speaker 1: can't wait to watch this. Oh yeah, it's definitely worth

1225
01:06:27,480 --> 01:06:31,960
Speaker 1: the way. Good luck on the freeway. Thank you. I

1226
01:06:32,000 --> 01:06:36,640
Speaker 1: did have reet Sorry I got by. I did have

1227
01:06:36,720 --> 01:06:38,280
Speaker 1: one thing that happened to me when I was like

1228
01:06:38,360 --> 01:06:41,160
Speaker 1: eighteen years old. Um, I had just moved to l A.

1229
01:06:41,520 --> 01:06:44,120
Speaker 1: And Um, this was like before I started going to

1230
01:06:44,200 --> 01:06:47,400
Speaker 1: church and all these types of things. Um. I went

1231
01:06:47,440 --> 01:06:50,120
Speaker 1: to like a psychic that was I lived on Robertson

1232
01:06:50,160 --> 01:06:51,720
Speaker 1: and I just like walked in because I was like,

1233
01:06:51,760 --> 01:06:53,880
Speaker 1: you know, I don't know anyone out here. The struggle

1234
01:06:53,960 --> 01:06:57,520
Speaker 1: is real. Like whatever, Um, I'm gonna go to the psychic.

1235
01:06:57,600 --> 01:06:59,800
Speaker 1: So I went, and she told me all these things

1236
01:07:00,000 --> 01:07:01,680
Speaker 1: out of them actually came true, like that I was

1237
01:07:01,680 --> 01:07:03,640
Speaker 1: going to marry somebody with two first names. I've been

1238
01:07:03,680 --> 01:07:07,320
Speaker 1: married twice and nobody has two first names. Um. But

1239
01:07:07,760 --> 01:07:10,160
Speaker 1: she gave me these candles and she said, like, if

1240
01:07:10,200 --> 01:07:13,320
Speaker 1: you ever really want to do like a cleanse or whatever,

1241
01:07:13,400 --> 01:07:16,840
Speaker 1: she said, go in the bathtub and light these candles

1242
01:07:16,840 --> 01:07:18,400
Speaker 1: and think about all the things that you want for

1243
01:07:18,440 --> 01:07:22,280
Speaker 1: your future. And my sister was down visiting, so I

1244
01:07:22,360 --> 01:07:25,240
Speaker 1: go into the bath and I'm like, I'm very serious

1245
01:07:25,240 --> 01:07:28,360
Speaker 1: about I tell my sister. I'm like, do not interrupt

1246
01:07:28,440 --> 01:07:31,320
Speaker 1: me for the entire time I'm in the bath. Listen,

1247
01:07:31,400 --> 01:07:34,720
Speaker 1: I'm taking I'm doing these candles. I'm thinking about my future.

1248
01:07:34,760 --> 01:07:38,760
Speaker 1: I need you to just know. She's like, okay, So

1249
01:07:38,880 --> 01:07:41,800
Speaker 1: I'm probably five attendants into the bath and I hear

1250
01:07:42,640 --> 01:07:46,240
Speaker 1: and I'm like what, And she's like, I just heard one.

1251
01:07:46,480 --> 01:07:50,400
Speaker 1: I'm like, but as I opened my eyes, my entire

1252
01:07:50,480 --> 01:07:56,320
Speaker 1: bathtub is black. And because well, I end up finding

1253
01:07:56,400 --> 01:08:00,120
Speaker 1: out that the pipes had burst in our bill thing.

1254
01:08:00,200 --> 01:08:04,160
Speaker 1: So I was like, I'm mud coming out through the things.

1255
01:08:04,200 --> 01:08:07,840
Speaker 1: But like, we still laugh because then I'm like me

1256
01:08:08,000 --> 01:08:13,040
Speaker 1: because I'm like covered and whatever this and she is,

1257
01:08:13,120 --> 01:08:15,040
Speaker 1: I mean, we still laugh about it. She's like, remember

1258
01:08:15,040 --> 01:08:18,920
Speaker 1: when you did your candles in the bath? They were covered?

1259
01:08:21,760 --> 01:08:24,519
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I thought that was a good time. So,

1260
01:08:24,560 --> 01:08:27,120
Speaker 1: you know, but that was my last any kind of

1261
01:08:27,160 --> 01:08:30,280
Speaker 1: discussion about that. But yeah, that's my my one and

1262
01:08:30,360 --> 01:08:33,720
Speaker 1: only experience that it happened to. You know, anybody else

1263
01:08:33,720 --> 01:08:38,360
Speaker 1: that was taking a bath at eight seven eight seven? Well,

1264
01:08:38,560 --> 01:08:42,519
Speaker 1: you know, there's also um irrational fears, and we've talked

1265
01:08:42,520 --> 01:08:44,160
Speaker 1: about a lot of fears here, and they're also the

1266
01:08:44,200 --> 01:08:46,200
Speaker 1: ones that are bizarre, that are to us bizarre, and

1267
01:08:46,280 --> 01:08:47,760
Speaker 1: we don't want to make light of them. But I

1268
01:08:47,800 --> 01:08:50,080
Speaker 1: remember Tyra Banks to the show and she opened about

1269
01:08:50,120 --> 01:08:54,120
Speaker 1: her fear of dolphins. She had a deathly fear of dolphins,

1270
01:08:54,200 --> 01:08:57,040
Speaker 1: which you can live a nice life because unless you're

1271
01:08:57,040 --> 01:09:00,120
Speaker 1: in the ocean, you're not gonna encounter a dolphin. But

1272
01:09:00,160 --> 01:09:02,320
Speaker 1: it's a legitimate fear. We've asked this on our face

1273
01:09:02,479 --> 01:09:04,719
Speaker 1: one of our podcast Facebook group a couple of times.

1274
01:09:04,840 --> 01:09:07,759
Speaker 1: Here's a woman right here in herrational fear of Bendy straws,

1275
01:09:07,800 --> 01:09:11,120
Speaker 1: and she's not joking. This is legitimate. She's afraid of

1276
01:09:11,160 --> 01:09:15,000
Speaker 1: bendy straws. Another woman. Did they say why? Well, she

1277
01:09:15,080 --> 01:09:17,880
Speaker 1: does recall a moment that in high school, her friends

1278
01:09:17,920 --> 01:09:20,120
Speaker 1: thought would be funny to bendy straw her house instead

1279
01:09:20,120 --> 01:09:22,760
Speaker 1: of toilet paper house or whatever. They bendy straw hear house.

1280
01:09:22,880 --> 01:09:25,200
Speaker 1: They hung them in the trees like ornaments and skewed

1281
01:09:25,240 --> 01:09:27,040
Speaker 1: them sticking up out of the ground, and she had

1282
01:09:27,040 --> 01:09:30,439
Speaker 1: a massive panic attack cleaning them up, and she has

1283
01:09:30,439 --> 01:09:31,800
Speaker 1: a hard time with them. I don't know if that's

1284
01:09:31,800 --> 01:09:34,000
Speaker 1: I don't mean to laugh, but exactly. But here's another

1285
01:09:34,200 --> 01:09:36,000
Speaker 1: This woman has a fear of band aid. She finds

1286
01:09:36,000 --> 01:09:38,240
Speaker 1: them disgusting and sticky and they freak her out. My

1287
01:09:38,320 --> 01:09:41,920
Speaker 1: daughter is afraid of stickers, really, she doesn't. She doesn't

1288
01:09:41,960 --> 01:09:43,800
Speaker 1: use the word afraid, but she's like, I don't want it,

1289
01:09:43,960 --> 01:09:46,320
Speaker 1: no thank you, Nope, I'm not interested in stickers. You

1290
01:09:46,360 --> 01:09:48,439
Speaker 1: know they always give them to kids, like at the bank,

1291
01:09:48,479 --> 01:09:51,800
Speaker 1: and she's like, no thank you, Like she does not

1292
01:09:51,960 --> 01:09:55,800
Speaker 1: like that sticky texture. But what is that? Is that

1293
01:09:55,920 --> 01:09:58,559
Speaker 1: just I guess it's just a techtile. I think it's

1294
01:09:58,560 --> 01:10:00,800
Speaker 1: a tactile thing for her. I don't think it's like

1295
01:10:00,840 --> 01:10:03,280
Speaker 1: a fear. But she's like not interested in what happens

1296
01:10:03,280 --> 01:10:06,360
Speaker 1: when a sticker comes off and there's that like little residue. Right,

1297
01:10:06,840 --> 01:10:09,479
Speaker 1: that's like a hard note for her, But she's like that.

1298
01:10:09,560 --> 01:10:11,600
Speaker 1: She's funny about a lot of different textures, So I

1299
01:10:11,600 --> 01:10:14,400
Speaker 1: guess that makes sense, but stickers is the only like

1300
01:10:14,400 --> 01:10:16,360
Speaker 1: like actual item. And do you feel like you need

1301
01:10:16,400 --> 01:10:18,840
Speaker 1: to fix this with your daughter. I'm totally cool with it.

1302
01:10:18,920 --> 01:10:21,640
Speaker 1: Cruise and Bella like the stickers and slights like no

1303
01:10:21,760 --> 01:10:24,400
Speaker 1: thank you, and I'm like, yeah, right, she's not freaking

1304
01:10:24,400 --> 01:10:27,320
Speaker 1: out the screen, and it doesn't mind a bay of stickers.

1305
01:10:27,360 --> 01:10:30,000
Speaker 1: She's like, go suit yourself and get all sticky breaks.

1306
01:10:30,960 --> 01:10:32,880
Speaker 1: And of course we worked with somebody who was definitely

1307
01:10:32,880 --> 01:10:37,160
Speaker 1: afraid of elevators, yes, and flying and flying in planes,

1308
01:10:37,160 --> 01:10:39,240
Speaker 1: which I think is pretty common. Actually, I was with

1309
01:10:39,280 --> 01:10:41,759
Speaker 1: her in Vegas when we took like seventy two flights

1310
01:10:41,760 --> 01:10:47,120
Speaker 1: of stairs up to our room. Why do you also

1311
01:10:47,160 --> 01:10:49,040
Speaker 1: have an elevator issue where you just being friend? No,

1312
01:10:49,080 --> 01:10:50,760
Speaker 1: I just it was I was new to the job.

1313
01:10:52,880 --> 01:10:55,880
Speaker 1: You just you're like, oh, we'll be We're just going

1314
01:10:55,920 --> 01:10:59,400
Speaker 1: three floors. I'm sure it wasn't actually seventy two. But

1315
01:10:59,439 --> 01:11:02,080
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, but I mean I really I

1316
01:11:02,120 --> 01:11:06,360
Speaker 1: feel similar about my driving and my um and my

1317
01:11:06,439 --> 01:11:10,240
Speaker 1: parking garages. But I my husband kind of tricked me.

1318
01:11:10,280 --> 01:11:12,240
Speaker 1: He goes, teddy if I and I'm not even a

1319
01:11:12,280 --> 01:11:14,000
Speaker 1: car person. He's like, but if I get you a

1320
01:11:14,000 --> 01:11:16,960
Speaker 1: new car, do you promise to like start driving three

1321
01:11:16,960 --> 01:11:19,680
Speaker 1: new places a week? And I was like, well, I

1322
01:11:19,680 --> 01:11:21,080
Speaker 1: don't really want a new car. He's like, well, I'm

1323
01:11:21,080 --> 01:11:23,800
Speaker 1: getting a new car anyway. But I you know, I

1324
01:11:23,840 --> 01:11:26,240
Speaker 1: think you should start getting out of your comfortsen because

1325
01:11:26,240 --> 01:11:30,559
Speaker 1: I would only drive. Yeah, I will only drive. I

1326
01:11:30,680 --> 01:11:33,759
Speaker 1: used to only drive about ten places, like the places

1327
01:11:33,840 --> 01:11:36,960
Speaker 1: like my kids go to the grocery store, the barn,

1328
01:11:37,720 --> 01:11:41,320
Speaker 1: you know, my workout place you're going to park you yeah,

1329
01:11:41,360 --> 01:11:44,479
Speaker 1: But recently I have, you know, the new cars just

1330
01:11:44,560 --> 01:11:46,360
Speaker 1: added to it, where I've just said like, no, you're

1331
01:11:46,800 --> 01:11:49,040
Speaker 1: you don't need to take an uber to go do this,

1332
01:11:49,520 --> 01:11:51,640
Speaker 1: you know, But I do always have to do my

1333
01:11:51,680 --> 01:11:53,960
Speaker 1: investigation first. I have to figure out where the parking is,

1334
01:11:54,160 --> 01:11:57,400
Speaker 1: if there's ballet, if it's a parking garage. Like for

1335
01:11:57,439 --> 01:11:59,360
Speaker 1: a while, I was like, I will just take an uber.

1336
01:11:59,479 --> 01:12:01,200
Speaker 1: I can't. I came in an uber the first three

1337
01:12:01,200 --> 01:12:03,679
Speaker 1: times I came here, and then I was like, Teddy,

1338
01:12:03,760 --> 01:12:07,479
Speaker 1: you're wasting money, Like you could drive yourself. The parking

1339
01:12:07,520 --> 01:12:10,200
Speaker 1: is validated. Like I started having to justify it to

1340
01:12:10,240 --> 01:12:12,519
Speaker 1: myself because I'm like, this is actually a bigger problem

1341
01:12:12,520 --> 01:12:13,960
Speaker 1: because I want to be able to leave here and

1342
01:12:13,960 --> 01:12:16,640
Speaker 1: go run errands to the places I do like driving too,

1343
01:12:16,720 --> 01:12:18,920
Speaker 1: and I'm creating a bigger issue in my life. So

1344
01:12:19,040 --> 01:12:22,960
Speaker 1: I think that's the key. If your fear isn't making

1345
01:12:22,960 --> 01:12:25,160
Speaker 1: a bigger problem for you, Like I don't think stickers

1346
01:12:25,240 --> 01:12:28,719
Speaker 1: is a problem for my daughter. But sometimes not driving

1347
01:12:28,760 --> 01:12:31,920
Speaker 1: because I'm afraid of parking does become a problem for me,

1348
01:12:32,400 --> 01:12:35,400
Speaker 1: and I spend so much time thinking about the potential

1349
01:12:35,560 --> 01:12:39,519
Speaker 1: of having to drive that I'm wasting my time. Right,

1350
01:12:40,880 --> 01:12:43,200
Speaker 1: you could already be there. I could already be there,

1351
01:12:43,280 --> 01:12:46,959
Speaker 1: Like why am I worried about this so far in advance?

1352
01:12:47,000 --> 01:12:48,840
Speaker 1: Why am I trying to talk like I'm already I

1353
01:12:48,880 --> 01:12:50,799
Speaker 1: have to go to the dentist on Friday. I'm already

1354
01:12:50,800 --> 01:12:53,920
Speaker 1: Like maybe I should cancel the dentist, Like I don't

1355
01:12:53,920 --> 01:12:55,760
Speaker 1: know if I want to go because that driving. There's

1356
01:12:55,840 --> 01:12:58,400
Speaker 1: really hard parking in Beverly Hills. It is the uncertainty,

1357
01:12:58,479 --> 01:13:00,519
Speaker 1: the chaos of it. Because I did that. I hate

1358
01:13:00,520 --> 01:13:02,080
Speaker 1: going new places and where am I gonna park? What

1359
01:13:02,080 --> 01:13:04,719
Speaker 1: I'm gonna do? And then you do park somewhere it's expensive,

1360
01:13:04,760 --> 01:13:06,479
Speaker 1: and then how much time do you put into it?

1361
01:13:06,520 --> 01:13:08,320
Speaker 1: I mean, I've been thinking about this since last week.

1362
01:13:08,360 --> 01:13:11,400
Speaker 1: I've like almost called and canceled, Like it's not a

1363
01:13:11,479 --> 01:13:13,040
Speaker 1: huge thing, but it's in the back of my mind,

1364
01:13:13,040 --> 01:13:14,960
Speaker 1: Like should I just cancel? Like I don't really need

1365
01:13:15,040 --> 01:13:16,559
Speaker 1: to go. I got my teeth cleaned five months ago,

1366
01:13:16,640 --> 01:13:18,640
Speaker 1: but they told me to come every six months, like

1367
01:13:18,680 --> 01:13:21,639
Speaker 1: should I cancel? Actually, now that we've had this conversation,

1368
01:13:21,680 --> 01:13:26,160
Speaker 1: I'm definitely canceling. But but it's similar to addiction. They

1369
01:13:26,160 --> 01:13:28,679
Speaker 1: say with addiction is if it's affecting your daily life,

1370
01:13:28,680 --> 01:13:30,680
Speaker 1: that's what you need to get some help. If you're

1371
01:13:30,680 --> 01:13:32,559
Speaker 1: not going to work because of your addiction, that sort

1372
01:13:32,560 --> 01:13:34,400
Speaker 1: of thing. It's the same with a fear. If it's

1373
01:13:34,439 --> 01:13:36,759
Speaker 1: throwing you off your game, then you've got a problem.

1374
01:13:36,800 --> 01:13:38,719
Speaker 1: And I think sometimes it's okay to have a gut

1375
01:13:38,760 --> 01:13:41,160
Speaker 1: instinct and to trust it, because that's what I mean,

1376
01:13:41,280 --> 01:13:44,360
Speaker 1: even when we talked about in the past podcast where

1377
01:13:44,400 --> 01:13:47,439
Speaker 1: the cults where they take away your gut instinct and

1378
01:13:47,520 --> 01:13:50,960
Speaker 1: that's that's what saves our lives. So I think it's

1379
01:13:50,960 --> 01:13:53,040
Speaker 1: good to trust your gut instinct. But if your fear

1380
01:13:53,120 --> 01:13:55,840
Speaker 1: has now crossed over to every part of your life

1381
01:13:55,840 --> 01:13:57,920
Speaker 1: and is making it so that you can't do something,

1382
01:13:58,280 --> 01:14:01,000
Speaker 1: that's where you need to start that I forget what

1383
01:14:01,160 --> 01:14:03,760
Speaker 1: what's the therapy called where you you touch it or

1384
01:14:04,520 --> 01:14:08,479
Speaker 1: the um exposure exposure? Yes, and where you start the

1385
01:14:08,479 --> 01:14:12,080
Speaker 1: exposure therapy so that you start getting comfortable with your

1386
01:14:12,160 --> 01:14:14,680
Speaker 1: fear or even talking about it. Some people don't even

1387
01:14:14,720 --> 01:14:19,719
Speaker 1: talk about their fears. Oh many people don't. Uh, well,

1388
01:14:21,360 --> 01:14:26,000
Speaker 1: I'm afraid we're gonna have to and for today, Um,

1389
01:14:26,040 --> 01:14:31,120
Speaker 1: but I'm excited to get into next week's topic. Which

1390
01:14:31,960 --> 01:14:34,840
Speaker 1: am I allowed to bring it up? Yet? What is that?

1391
01:14:35,200 --> 01:14:38,840
Speaker 1: It's going to be cheating? It's gonna be cheating. I

1392
01:14:38,880 --> 01:14:41,639
Speaker 1: am very I want to talk to all different kind

1393
01:14:41,640 --> 01:14:44,280
Speaker 1: of cheaters. I want to talk to the man who cheats,

1394
01:14:44,320 --> 01:14:46,240
Speaker 1: the wife that cheats. I want to talk to the

1395
01:14:46,280 --> 01:14:48,880
Speaker 1: mistress and why she wants to cheat. I want to

1396
01:14:48,920 --> 01:14:53,120
Speaker 1: talk to I mean, I have so many questions. There's

1397
01:14:53,160 --> 01:14:57,880
Speaker 1: been a lot of cheating things in social media, and

1398
01:14:59,600 --> 01:15:01,680
Speaker 1: we need day and there are spouses that live in

1399
01:15:01,760 --> 01:15:05,760
Speaker 1: constant fear of cheating justified or not, who never out

1400
01:15:05,800 --> 01:15:08,439
Speaker 1: of the site. And also how much privacy or how

1401
01:15:08,520 --> 01:15:10,880
Speaker 1: much freedom do you need to be giving your partner,

1402
01:15:10,960 --> 01:15:14,479
Speaker 1: like is passwords and then track your phone? There's all

1403
01:15:14,479 --> 01:15:17,400
Speaker 1: of these things. Is everything fair game once you're married

1404
01:15:17,600 --> 01:15:20,000
Speaker 1: or is it? Do you still set boundaries? I can

1405
01:15:20,000 --> 01:15:22,920
Speaker 1: say with certainty I could hand over my phone to

1406
01:15:22,960 --> 01:15:25,320
Speaker 1: my husband at any point in time. If I said no,

1407
01:15:25,360 --> 01:15:27,320
Speaker 1: I would think there would be a problem, right, And

1408
01:15:27,439 --> 01:15:32,840
Speaker 1: what is cheating everybody you know, all this BS emotional cheap,

1409
01:15:33,120 --> 01:15:35,080
Speaker 1: it's all cheating. We got to get into it next week,

1410
01:15:35,160 --> 01:15:39,160
Speaker 1: micro cheating. We have things to talk about and we

1411
01:15:39,240 --> 01:15:42,280
Speaker 1: want to hear your question. So right the man? Okay,

1412
01:15:42,520 --> 01:15:45,960
Speaker 1: Teddy t at I heart radio dot com. Thanks guys,

1413
01:15:46,880 --> 01:15:51,960
Speaker 1: thanks for listening. Subscribe to or wherever you listen to

1414
01:15:51,960 --> 01:15:52,640
Speaker 1: podcasts