Speaker 1: We're taking you inside the mind of a man. This
Speaker 1: is how Men Thick and I heard radio podcast. Hey,
Speaker 1: what's going on everybody. I'm Jeff Timmins and you may
Speaker 1: know me from the boyband Degrees. I'm so happy and
Speaker 1: thrilled to be guest hosting How Men Think. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: answer all your questions and try to help you understand
Speaker 1: how Men Think. But first, this is eleven Questions with
Speaker 1: Jeff Timmins. So let's get into it. What are you
Speaker 1: known for? Well? Uh, mostly known for being a member
Speaker 1: of ninety eight Degrees, which has been an amazing run
Speaker 1: for me. It's our twenty fifth year. Uh this year
Speaker 1: Degrees being in existence. Although it makes me feel really old,
Speaker 1: I feel very blessed and fortunate to get out there
Speaker 1: and still be performing for such wonderful fans and be
Speaker 1: doing this for a living and supporting my family. So
Speaker 1: I think all of you a little bit about me.
Speaker 1: I love music, of course, that's the obvious thing. I'm
Speaker 1: a big family man. I've got five kids, They're all amazing.
Speaker 1: I've been very blessed, got a beautiful wife, and you
Speaker 1: know I like to work behind the scenes as well.
Speaker 1: I'm a big studio guy. Um like to do music
Speaker 1: and produce stuff for other people, I mean the tech space.
Speaker 1: It's like to keep busy. So who am I in
Speaker 1: my personal life? I'm just a guy that likes the
Speaker 1: screw around. I don't take myself too seriously at all.
Speaker 1: I take other people seriously. But I like to have
Speaker 1: a lot of fun, roll with the flow, make people laugh,
Speaker 1: and you know, enjoy family and friends and you know,
Speaker 1: the little things in life are are very very important
Speaker 1: to me. All right. What are three shows that I'm
Speaker 1: binge watching. Well, there's a show called Elite. There's a
Speaker 1: lot of these Spanish shows that are translated to English
Speaker 1: on Netflix that I really love. Elite is one of them.
Speaker 1: Money Heisten is another one. And then I've really been
Speaker 1: kind of getting my guilty pleasure from the Pam and
Speaker 1: Tommy story on Hulu, which I absolutely love. What is
Speaker 1: my favorite food? Well, it's kind of a toss up.
Speaker 1: I'm a low carb guy, so it's usually meat and
Speaker 1: cheese and seafood and things like that. I would have
Speaker 1: to say steak and lobster. I'm you know, I like
Speaker 1: the finer things in life, so I'd say steaks, steak,
Speaker 1: steak and lobster my favorite foods. Tell us about your career, Well,
Speaker 1: I have been totally blessed. Uh, it's been a wonderful ride.
Speaker 1: I'm from a very small town in Ohio where you know,
Speaker 1: a lot of not a lot of people kind of
Speaker 1: venture off into the entertainment business. UM. I was inspired
Speaker 1: by the group Boys Two Men and wanted to create
Speaker 1: a similar group just like that. Um, we didn't have
Speaker 1: the Internet and uh things that like like like um,
Speaker 1: Twitter and Snapchat and YouTube at our disposal and TikTok,
Speaker 1: so you literally had to go pursue your dreams. I
Speaker 1: drove with my original band across the country to l
Speaker 1: a Um to pursue the dream and got lucky. You know.
Speaker 1: We ended up singing backstage at a Boys de Men
Speaker 1: concert ironically, and we're fortunate enough to get signed and
Speaker 1: we got signed to Motown Records, which is a legendary label. UM,
Speaker 1: like Boys Demand Did. We toured the world, we sold
Speaker 1: millions and millions of records and we're still around twenty
Speaker 1: five years later with great fans that embrace our music
Speaker 1: and we enjoy the camaraderie of our brotherhood of getting
Speaker 1: up on stage and acting silly and singing songs for
Speaker 1: our living. So it's been a blessing. We've got to
Speaker 1: perform with Stevie Wonder on a song for Disney's Mulan
Speaker 1: with Mariah Carey that went and Joe that a song
Speaker 1: that went number one. We got to perform for Michael
Speaker 1: Jackson with Usher and Luther Vandrow's anything you can imagine.
Speaker 1: We've been fortunate enough to do and and we never
Speaker 1: took different granted. So it's been an amazing ride. What's
Speaker 1: my biggest fear in life? I think just not being successful.
Speaker 1: I mean I think that, uh you know, it's important
Speaker 1: for me to always get better every day. Uh, never
Speaker 1: settled for mediocrity. I don't expect that of everybody else
Speaker 1: that I meet in my life, particularly my beautiful wife
Speaker 1: and my kids. But for me, it's always achieving something
Speaker 1: new and it doesn't necessarily have to do with monetization
Speaker 1: and making money or being famous. It's just getting better
Speaker 1: every day. So my fear is to become relaxed and
Speaker 1: not be a success or not really have the influence
Speaker 1: and impact that I hope to do to encourage others
Speaker 1: to pursue their dreams. So the fear of failure is
Speaker 1: probably my biggest driver, ah, my biggest pet peeve. On
Speaker 1: that note, I despise people that are lazy. I like
Speaker 1: people that like to kick back and take it easy,
Speaker 1: but laziness drives me absolutely crazy. Absolutely my pet peete laziness.
Speaker 1: What makes me most happy seeing smiling faces in my family.
Speaker 1: I mean, I think it's really really important. Um. The
Speaker 1: world is always, uh, you know, a challenging place to
Speaker 1: live in and life is hard, so you know, the
Speaker 1: small victories for me or when I see smiling faces
Speaker 1: on all of my kids, I see happy faces, and
Speaker 1: you know, when my wife's happy, that's always nice. My
Speaker 1: ideal Saturday morning, well, you know, Saturday, the day is
Speaker 1: kind of blur together. I travel a lot. I'm very
Speaker 1: fortunate to do, and um, so Saturdays could be a Sunday,
Speaker 1: it could be a Monday. I'm always working, which is
Speaker 1: a really very fortunate thing for myself. Um, but you know,
Speaker 1: if if you're talking about the weekend, a Saturday morning
Speaker 1: would be watching college football. I know that's a boring answer,
Speaker 1: but I'm a big sports fan and being from a
Speaker 1: small town in Ohio that revolves around football, Massillon, Ohio, Um,
Speaker 1: I love watching my college football and I'm just hanging
Speaker 1: out with my kids on a Saturday if I'm in
Speaker 1: town and if we're all together. But traditionally I'm I'm
Speaker 1: watching college football, either with the guys in ninety eight
Speaker 1: degrees or even by myself. But that's a that's a
Speaker 1: typical Saturday for me. Am, I'm more of an athlete
Speaker 1: or our share quarterback. Um, well, I'd like to think.
Speaker 1: I'd like to think of an athlete. I but you
Speaker 1: know what, I'm just I'm coming to terms with the
Speaker 1: fact that I'm not that good of an athlete, so
Speaker 1: I'm sort of both. I try to keep in shape.
Speaker 1: I wanted to play football collegiately, and of course in
Speaker 1: the NFL where I'm from, it's all about that. And
Speaker 1: unfortunately I was vertically challenged. I didn't have enough skills,
Speaker 1: wasn't good. I mean, the list goes on and on.
Speaker 1: But I would say now I've I've come to terms
Speaker 1: with the fact that I'm an arm chair quarterback. I
Speaker 1: watched you criticize the coaches and throw stuff at the
Speaker 1: TV and say they should have any better choices and
Speaker 1: all that stuff. But at the end of the day,
Speaker 1: I'm just a fan like everybody else. What keeps you motivated? Um? Well,
Speaker 1: I have a lot of self motivation. UM. I think
Speaker 1: you know, striving to be successful is an important thing
Speaker 1: for me, and to get better every day. Like I mentioned, Um,
Speaker 1: but my family does you know? I want to be
Speaker 1: able to provide for them so they don't have to struggle.
Speaker 1: I've been very fortunate, but you know, along the ways
Speaker 1: there are high highs and low lows in the entertainment industry.
Speaker 1: And if I can prevent anybody in my life, not
Speaker 1: just my family, but groups and bands and artists that
Speaker 1: I mentor or just people along the way that I
Speaker 1: meet in life, if I can um prevent them from
Speaker 1: having some of those low lows. Uh, that's very very
Speaker 1: motivating for me in life. So that was eleven questions
Speaker 1: and now we're going to get right into some of
Speaker 1: your phone calls. Hi Meggan, are you there? Hi? Hi?
Speaker 1: How are you? I'm good? How are you? Wow? Such
Speaker 1: a clear, clean sound coming from your computer. Oh, thank you,
Speaker 1: I am using my earbuds. Oh nice, nice, Nice to
Speaker 1: meet you too. So do you have a question for
Speaker 1: me or anything you want to talk about. I do
Speaker 1: have a question for you. Okay, here's the deal. A
Speaker 1: guy asked me on a date, and then on the
Speaker 1: day of the day, I didn't hear from him. So
Speaker 1: I reached out to him like two hours before to
Speaker 1: make sure we were on and he bales and says
Speaker 1: he has to go to his friend's mother's birthday dinner.
Speaker 1: So that seems kind of like a cop out. But whatever,
Speaker 1: indeed does seem like a cop out, I don't think that,
Speaker 1: you know, I think that obviously you want to follow
Speaker 1: up to make sure that the data is still on
Speaker 1: and all that good stuff, and and sometimes that kind
Speaker 1: of stuff can be awkward. But the fact that he
Speaker 1: canceled if it was a different excuse, for example, if
Speaker 1: he had kids or it was his own mother, but
Speaker 1: it was his friend's mother's birthday, and you know, and
Speaker 1: you reached out to him two hours beforehand instead of
Speaker 1: him reaching out to you to kind of let him know,
Speaker 1: it sounds like he bailed time to move on. Okay,
Speaker 1: But see, now here's my follow up though, he just
Speaker 1: asked me out on another day, So like, do I
Speaker 1: give him another try or am I? Like? Nah? I
Speaker 1: think maybe a conversation would be had about why he canceled.
Speaker 1: Kind of feel out the vibe on the phone, right yeah,
Speaker 1: time call, which you can really kind of tell cues
Speaker 1: with people's visuals right lying in the queues there, um,
Speaker 1: with the spatial expressions and all that, and maybe saying hey,
Speaker 1: I totally forgot, I'm so sorry. I want to make
Speaker 1: it up to you, or he says, well, uh, and
Speaker 1: he if he does that, obviously a second date, well,
Speaker 1: a first second date isn't an effect. I don't think. Okay,
Speaker 1: I think that's a good plan. I like that. Thank you.
Speaker 1: I'm not a relationship expert, but you know, no, but
Speaker 1: that's helpful because I just couldn't even tell, like I
Speaker 1: was like, I don't even know how to I don't
Speaker 1: know how to perceive with this, like what's your deal?
Speaker 1: So that's great. You got to feel the vibe out
Speaker 1: on all this stuff for sure. Thank you. Bye bye,
Speaker 1: Hey Simona, how are you? I'm good? How are you?
Speaker 1: I'm good. I'm enjoying this. Uh, this Q and A
Speaker 1: that I'm doing with people that are calling it about
Speaker 1: relationship advice. The worst guy in the planet to give advice,
Speaker 1: but I'll do my best. What kind of questions do
Speaker 1: you have for me today. Well, okay, so my question is,
Speaker 1: I'm so, I'm a divorced mom of two kids and
Speaker 1: dating kind of sucks right now. Um, I'll have a
Speaker 1: great date, and then as soon as my date hears
Speaker 1: about my kids, it doesn't go further. Um. So my
Speaker 1: question is how far into dating someone should I bring
Speaker 1: up my kids? Is there a way to do that
Speaker 1: that won't scare them off? Well? Look, I mean anybody
Speaker 1: that you want to be with long term, it depends
Speaker 1: on whether you're looking for a long term relationship or
Speaker 1: you just out there looking to have fun. Right. If
Speaker 1: you're out there looking to have fun, you can mention
Speaker 1: them later, mention your kids later on in your dating process.
Speaker 1: But I think if you're serious about settling down with somebody,
Speaker 1: finding the one, I think you got to mention your
Speaker 1: kids right away. I mean, with with me, I always
Speaker 1: talked about my kids right away, and if that was
Speaker 1: an issue, then that was an automatical, automatic X out
Speaker 1: for for me. With uh with that, because you know,
Speaker 1: obviously my children are the most important thing to me
Speaker 1: in my entire life. So if someone is kind of,
Speaker 1: you know, getting scared or afraid of you because you
Speaker 1: have kids, I mean I say run for the hills.
Speaker 1: But like I said in the beginning of the conversation,
Speaker 1: if you're just going to have fun and it's not
Speaker 1: going to be a long term thing, then it might
Speaker 1: not necessarily be a topic of conversation. Okay, all right,
Speaker 1: thank you, thanks Semona. Hi, Kate, how are you? Hey? Good?
Speaker 1: How are you nice? To be connected with you over
Speaker 1: zoom you too, It's really nice to connect. Um. I
Speaker 1: guess I could use some advice. Okay, Well, I'll do
Speaker 1: my best to give you some advice. I'm not I'm
Speaker 1: not I'm not a doctor and expert, but I'll try
Speaker 1: my best from life experience to help you out. Okay, Um, well,
Speaker 1: here's my scenario. I went on a date, a first
Speaker 1: date with a guy the other day. I met him
Speaker 1: on just like a dating app and it was a
Speaker 1: it was a great date. But he drank a lot
Speaker 1: about the date, like a lot, A lot, And what's
Speaker 1: a lot coming from a drinker? A lot to mean,
Speaker 1: you know, how much? Was a lot? He had two
Speaker 1: drinks before the appetizer got there, three before dinner was over,
Speaker 1: and two more before the check came, so like seven
Speaker 1: drinks and I had to the whole time, so we're
Speaker 1: under twelve. No, did he was he? Was he drinking
Speaker 1: it like he was needed to drink the booze to
Speaker 1: get through the night. Or was he drinking because he
Speaker 1: was trying to be social? How was his behavior as
Speaker 1: he drank? I mean, there's so many lays I need
Speaker 1: to know about this fellow drinking guy that I need to.
Speaker 1: I don't want to. I don't want to disparage the
Speaker 1: guy or or kind of lead you in the wrong direction.
Speaker 1: If he's a nice guy, maybe he was nervous. You
Speaker 1: know a lot of times us guys are nervous around
Speaker 1: beautiful women like yourself, and you know, afraid that especially
Speaker 1: if he's been on the dating scene for a while,
Speaker 1: maybe not had that much success like most people don't
Speaker 1: um And so that was a way for him to
Speaker 1: calm his nerves. But if he's drinking, is almost he
Speaker 1: has a problem, and the guy's getting sloppy and he's
Speaker 1: fallen all over the place. I mean that's probably self explanatory, right, yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean that's the thing that he wasn't mesty, he
Speaker 1: wasn't slurring, He was totally fine, Like he needed it
Speaker 1: to like self regulate his his nerves or something because
Speaker 1: he wasn't drunk, which is also amazing, Like, what kind
Speaker 1: of metabolism does he have that he can drink that
Speaker 1: much and be fine. He's a pro. Where's this guy lit?
Speaker 1: Because that's what what Midwestern people like myself, Dude, there's
Speaker 1: nothing to do except for drink um and and talk
Speaker 1: about sports. But no, look, I mean, certainly that's a
Speaker 1: lot of drinks to having at night. And if he
Speaker 1: was getting sloppy, or he was embarrassing himself or you
Speaker 1: in the process, you know, obviously you know, there's probably
Speaker 1: not a call for a second date there. But if
Speaker 1: the guy was just getting through the night and it
Speaker 1: was your first was at your first date with the guy, Yes,
Speaker 1: it was our first time meeting. I'm pretty laxed with
Speaker 1: that stuff. I'd say give the guy a pass, give
Speaker 1: him a second date. If the guy is sitting on
Speaker 1: a Tuesday afternoon and he doesn't have a job and
Speaker 1: he's smashing you know, bush leg draft or you know,
Speaker 1: or or bottle jack, I would start to get worried then,
Speaker 1: but I think, you know, maybe give him a second
Speaker 1: shot and see if he kind of slows it down
Speaker 1: the second time around. Or maybe that's just part of
Speaker 1: the guy's personality. But you know, it's something to watch,
Speaker 1: but not something to be concerned with on the first date.
Speaker 1: Just my opinion. Okay, cool, I'll take that and I'll
Speaker 1: definitely give him another shot. And you know, I don't know,
Speaker 1: maybe I'll call and give you an update again. I
Speaker 1: would love it. Right now. I need to know, so
Speaker 1: send me a note. I want to find out how
Speaker 1: it goes. Alrighty, we'll do Thank you so much. I
Speaker 1: appreciate it. Appreciate it alright, by bye bye. Hi, Susan,
Speaker 1: how are you? Hi? I'm great, how are you. I'm
Speaker 1: doing great. I'm having a lot of fun on with this,
Speaker 1: uh this podcast. It's pretty cool, wonderful. So, um, I'm
Speaker 1: dating this guy who he's a great guy. He has
Speaker 1: two kids and I have three kids, and we're getting
Speaker 1: pretty serious and I'm thinking it's time that the kids
Speaker 1: met each other. So I'm just wondering, you know, like
Speaker 1: what's a good way to introduce them and is there
Speaker 1: anything I need to be careful of to ensure it
Speaker 1: goes well? Like I'm just I'm a little nervous about
Speaker 1: the whole thing, you know, because so far it's been
Speaker 1: me and him. It sounds like a great question. And
Speaker 1: and look, I've been through this, so I can speak
Speaker 1: to what what worked for me doesn't necessarily mean it
Speaker 1: works for everybody. Um, but I actually, have you ever
Speaker 1: seen how First of all, how long have you been
Speaker 1: dating this guy? Like seven and a half months? That's
Speaker 1: a long time. I mean that's a that's a pretty
Speaker 1: lengthy amount of time. And it probably is time that you,
Speaker 1: you know, sort of see how the family members would
Speaker 1: interact in there if you're getting started to get pretty
Speaker 1: serious about it. Um, you know, I think that with
Speaker 1: regards to you know, watching somebody other how the other
Speaker 1: person parents? Have you parents their kids? Have you been
Speaker 1: able to take a look at how he is with
Speaker 1: his kids? Um? Yeah, I mean I haven't, like I
Speaker 1: haven't had a lot of time with them either, you know. Um,
Speaker 1: but he seems like, you know, they seem to kid
Speaker 1: around kind of and like they have a nice They
Speaker 1: seem pretty close. Does he talk with affinity for his kids?
Speaker 1: Is that like a lot of the topic of conversation.
Speaker 1: I know a lot of people, you know, are are
Speaker 1: scared and shy away from talking about their kids because
Speaker 1: they're afraid that this person that they're gonna date doesn't
Speaker 1: like that. But in this case, he's got kids of
Speaker 1: his own, does he does he speak affectionately about his
Speaker 1: own kids? Oh yeah, oh yeah, definitely. Well look, I
Speaker 1: think that's a start, and um, you know, I think
Speaker 1: that with me. I saw my wife with her kids,
Speaker 1: and I was like, Okay, she's a good mom. She
Speaker 1: takes care of her kids, she handles her business, she
Speaker 1: disciplines them the right way, they have respect for her,
Speaker 1: they're well put together. So that after I saw that,
Speaker 1: I thought it would be a good time to introduce
Speaker 1: her to my kids, which was, you know, kind of
Speaker 1: a difficult thing because I didn't have the easiest of
Speaker 1: of divorce process of the divorce process going on, so
Speaker 1: it was I was always very nervous about introducing um
Speaker 1: my kids to other people, which I didn't forever until
Speaker 1: I met my wife and felt comfortable about how she
Speaker 1: was with her kids, and they ended up getting along famously.
Speaker 1: I mean, uh, And what I was. I travel a lot,
Speaker 1: So I was in a certain city that was close
Speaker 1: to them, and and her kids were close to to us,
Speaker 1: and really we were just out and about and we
Speaker 1: went and did an event and took him to a
Speaker 1: hotel and they all kind of had a good time,
Speaker 1: went swimming and all that stuff. And then you know
Speaker 1: that the rest after that was always positive. So they
Speaker 1: all got along. You know, they fought a little bit
Speaker 1: like any uh, you know family would do. But um,
Speaker 1: you know it, are any of them still in the
Speaker 1: house or three of them are gone? Three of them
Speaker 1: are off to school and doing other things and graduated,
Speaker 1: you know, and then we have two left here. So
Speaker 1: my my youngest stepson just turned sixteen yesterday. He's still
Speaker 1: here and now he's driving and it's gone to buy
Speaker 1: in a flash. I've known him since he's three years old.
Speaker 1: And then um uh, my daughter's ten. So those are
Speaker 1: the only two that are left. And then the other
Speaker 1: ones are are all growing up now one and almost
Speaker 1: twenty one. So it's been a fun ride. That's so great.
Speaker 1: So do you have any suggestions on like like a
Speaker 1: things like what kind of setting should we be in?
Speaker 1: Do you think for the kids to meet each other?
Speaker 1: I think it might be cool, you know what, just
Speaker 1: do something fun where they can have fun together, like, uh,
Speaker 1: take him to Wet and Wild or go to like
Speaker 1: a theme park or something like that that's a good
Speaker 1: way kids ice. They can hang out with each other,
Speaker 1: they can go run around and and do fun stuff
Speaker 1: together and you know, like kids would do if as
Speaker 1: if they're meeting friends right as opposed to like some
Speaker 1: formal dinner we're like you're sitting across from Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I know sister or you know step sisters. So I
Speaker 1: think in a fun environment is always a really really
Speaker 1: cool way for for young people to break the ice. Okay,
Speaker 1: that's a good idea. I'm thinking maybe even mini golf
Speaker 1: or something like that. Do people's don't great? Yeah, something
Speaker 1: like that bowling mini golf like you know, yeah, I
Speaker 1: don't know where you live, but like a small theme
Speaker 1: park Disney Went and Wild. Their kids always love to
Speaker 1: go to the water parks together, that kind of stuff,
Speaker 1: don't car Okay, yeah, no, I think that's a good idea,
Speaker 1: good idea. Well, thanks you. I appreciate it, of course,
Speaker 1: thank you so much, because, um now you've given me
Speaker 1: some um you know, now at least I have some ideas.
Speaker 1: Like I before, I was just like I have no,
Speaker 1: I can't even I don't know. I've just been nervous,
Speaker 1: you know, Yeah, I completely relate and understand. And UM,
Speaker 1: I got your email from the producers, so I'll send
Speaker 1: you the bill. It's only gonna be a hundred for
Speaker 1: this short call. I'm just just playing anyhow. Nice to
Speaker 1: talk to you and good luck with all that. Thank
Speaker 1: you so much, Thank you. Bye. Hi, it's up late.
Speaker 1: Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. How are
Speaker 1: you today? Oh? I'm good? Are you? I'm doing great? Um?
Speaker 1: So um, thank you so much for taking my call. Um.
Speaker 1: I'm so. I'm thirty six. My boyfriend is twenty six. Um,
Speaker 1: we've been together for a while. Um. Anyways, we've been
Speaker 1: talking a lot about having kids lately and uh. Um,
Speaker 1: so I've kids have always been part of my plan
Speaker 1: and I feel like my biological clock is ticketing. Um,
Speaker 1: and so I really want to get married and start
Speaker 1: trying for kids. But when we started talking about it,
Speaker 1: he thinks that kids are like four years away for
Speaker 1: him at least. But I'm worried that four years might
Speaker 1: be too late for me. Should I Should I stay
Speaker 1: in this and be patient with him? Or like, should
Speaker 1: I try and find someone who's more like in the
Speaker 1: line with my timeline? Wow, what a tricky question where
Speaker 1: I'd hate to give you the wrong advice on this one.
Speaker 1: But how long? First of all, there's some important factors.
Speaker 1: You said you've been a long together for a long time.
Speaker 1: How long is a long long time? Um? Well it's
Speaker 1: been like, well, a long time for me is three years.
Speaker 1: The three years He was twenty three and you were
Speaker 1: thirty three at the time. Yeah, so three years. It's
Speaker 1: kind of a long time. And when you first started dating,
Speaker 1: was this any part of the discussion at all that
Speaker 1: you would like to have kids? And obviously he knows
Speaker 1: you're just a little bit older than him. Um, I'm
Speaker 1: sure it's in the back of his mind that you
Speaker 1: would probably want to have kids at some point. Um,
Speaker 1: did that ever come up in the beginning or all
Speaker 1: of a sudden, Did you just spring it on him
Speaker 1: that you know what, I think it's time for us
Speaker 1: to have kids. Yeah. No, we definitely have had those
Speaker 1: conversations since the beginning. It was you know, I would
Speaker 1: not have gotten with him in the first place if
Speaker 1: he hadn't been someone who have said that he wanted kids. Uh,
Speaker 1: it's just that, Um, now I'm realizing, Oh no, this
Speaker 1: like age gap, uh might actually be a problem. Well,
Speaker 1: this is something you often hear. I mean, look, I
Speaker 1: mean there are a couple of different other factors. Does
Speaker 1: his career prevent him from being able to put the
Speaker 1: time in it that's necessary to be a father. Is
Speaker 1: there anything going on with regards to his his professional
Speaker 1: life that would prevent him. Does he travel a lot?
Speaker 1: Or is he a baseball player or rock star? I mean,
Speaker 1: is there something that that keeps this man, keeps him
Speaker 1: on the road all the time that he wouldn't be
Speaker 1: able to put the time and necessary to be a
Speaker 1: good dad. Uh No, No, he works a pretty standard
Speaker 1: like nine to six job um in finance. Like he's
Speaker 1: very you know, he's he's got his stuff together. Everything is,
Speaker 1: everything's in a good place. I think he just feels like,
Speaker 1: you know, he's not really you know, he wants to
Speaker 1: do traveling and stuff like that, and you know he
Speaker 1: feels like there's just a lot that he still wants
Speaker 1: to do before having kids. Well, look, I mean there
Speaker 1: there are a couple of things. One he has to
Speaker 1: respect that you know, you you're having anxiety about your
Speaker 1: biological clock. Although that as we know now, there are
Speaker 1: things you can do with regards to science that enable
Speaker 1: you to carry children and bear them a lot older
Speaker 1: than you used to be able to do back in
Speaker 1: the day that's available, but he also has to respect
Speaker 1: your desire to to do this in a in a
Speaker 1: in a natural way. And and so I think, you know,
Speaker 1: three years just my opinion, and all of a sudden,
Speaker 1: this relationships and I get I get like a d
Speaker 1: M on Instagram from this guy who is mad at
Speaker 1: me because you broke up with them. Um, no, I
Speaker 1: I think that probably time you have that talk with
Speaker 1: him and say, hey, look, we've been together three years.
Speaker 1: I've invested this time into you. You know me well
Speaker 1: enough that this is kind of something that I really
Speaker 1: see on the horizon and want to do before I
Speaker 1: feel like it's too late or I have to go
Speaker 1: through obstacles to make it more difficult for me to
Speaker 1: have kids. And I think it's it's definitely worth the conversation. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm I guess I'm worried that you know, if I
Speaker 1: if for some reason I break up with him, like
Speaker 1: that's a no go, then you know, well I just
Speaker 1: ruin my chances at all. But I guess we'll we'll
Speaker 1: find out. Well, I mean, look, you don't have to
Speaker 1: break up with them. But you know, maybe feel it,
Speaker 1: feel it out, because sometimes guys will prolong the you know,
Speaker 1: they'll they'll just kind of there. There might never be
Speaker 1: a time, you know what I mean that they'll say
Speaker 1: he wants to have kids and he just enjoys dating you,
Speaker 1: which is perfectly fine. But if you have different life
Speaker 1: goals for yourself and and and the way you envision
Speaker 1: you know, being a mother, and that's not going to
Speaker 1: play into his plans, and then maybe it is good
Speaker 1: good to cut it short. Yeah, yeah, okay, okay, cool, Well,
Speaker 1: thank you so much, Thank you appreciated, Bhie, thank you
Speaker 1: made to you. Holdine is the and busy man. Oh
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. Let me let me turn that down.
Speaker 1: The problem by all means, please play our music at
Speaker 1: all times in your house. That's awesome. I had to
Speaker 1: go back and it brought back so many memories. I mean,
Speaker 1: ninety degrees in rising, it's a classic. I'm loving the
Speaker 1: backdrop with the co posters back there, the Moman ruge,
Speaker 1: what is that? The aviator? Gladiator? Oh gladiator? Nice, very nice.
Speaker 1: Thanks for taking the time to join me today. Of course.
Speaker 1: Oh here's my cat right on time. She loves boys
Speaker 1: to her name is Pixy. Yes, what a cool name. Hey, Okay,
Speaker 1: you can go, let me talk to Jeff. Um, I'm
Speaker 1: so excited to me You've been such a huge fan
Speaker 1: for a long time. Thank you. I'm totally flattered and
Speaker 1: excited to meet you too. I really appreciate it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: of course. Um. So I'm just gonna jump in with
Speaker 1: my question. Um, So, it seems like, you know, back
Speaker 1: in the day, there was like rivalries among the groups, right,
Speaker 1: but recently, you know, we see guys from different groups
Speaker 1: doing things together, right, like the boy Man Christmas specialty
Speaker 1: you were in last year. So aside from maybe just
Speaker 1: being like a little bit older and wiser, what do
Speaker 1: you what do you think has changed to sort of
Speaker 1: encourage those kind of collaborations. Well, here's what's really interesting, Donna,
Speaker 1: because we never really had a rivalry with the other
Speaker 1: other quote unquote boy bands. I know, it's it's contrary
Speaker 1: to popular belief and it's not a it's not a
Speaker 1: great hot button for the media, but we really really
Speaker 1: had a ton of respect for both the Backstreet Boys
Speaker 1: groups we were compared to Backstreet Boys and instinct although
Speaker 1: we were un formulated a little bit differently and that
Speaker 1: we put ourselves together and considered ourselves a vocal group.
Speaker 1: Certainly years later, we're thrilled and honored to be mentioned
Speaker 1: in the same company with those guys and you know,
Speaker 1: experience in the same sort of journey, the high highs
Speaker 1: and low lows that those guys that we had nothing
Speaker 1: but respect for them, they had tons of hits, tons
Speaker 1: of talent, and we're just great guys to be around
Speaker 1: on the road. I mean, like you had mentioned there,
Speaker 1: there was the boy band Christmas Special, there was this
Speaker 1: thing called back Sync. They had this thing here in
Speaker 1: Vegas called the After Party. I'm part of a company,
Speaker 1: a group called A T C K with A J
Speaker 1: and christ you know. Um, so you know, I I
Speaker 1: have an affinity and love and appreciation for those guys,
Speaker 1: their journey, their work ethic and just what what type
Speaker 1: of great people they are. You know, haven't been in
Speaker 1: the business now for twenty seven years, it's anniversary. You know,
Speaker 1: you don't really come across people that are really true
Speaker 1: and genuine and and great folks to be around. And
Speaker 1: to be honest, it sounds like I can't answer, but
Speaker 1: those guys are all fantastic dudes. Okay, And because I
Speaker 1: just saw Backstreet in Vegas two weeks ago, and now
Speaker 1: I have to ask when are we going to see nine? Well, look, yeah,
Speaker 1: as I mentioned, it's our twenty fifth anniversary. Thanks for
Speaker 1: asking the question. Um, we're thrilled and excited that so
Speaker 1: many people are coming out to see us. I mean
Speaker 1: we've we've been you know, back since two thousand and
Speaker 1: thirteen when we toured with Boys the Men and New Kids,
Speaker 1: and since then, I've had multiple tours. The fans are
Speaker 1: always there for us. We're gonna be recording some stuff
Speaker 1: last week of I want to say May, uh, first
Speaker 1: week of May, we're recording some new material, and then
Speaker 1: we're gonna be back on the road end of August,
Speaker 1: probably into September, and then go through the holiday season.
Speaker 1: I don't know that we'll probably do a holiday tour
Speaker 1: like we've done in the past, but we will definitely
Speaker 1: be on the road, you know, going out there and
Speaker 1: uh hitting the pavement, doing some shows for our fans.
Speaker 1: Were super excited about it. That's awesome. I'm super excited.
Speaker 1: And I just have to say this gift is one
Speaker 1: of my favorite Christmas songs. Thank you. I mean you
Speaker 1: look the Christmas album I'm proud of all the material
Speaker 1: and feel blessed and fortunate and lucky to be a
Speaker 1: part of any of it. But I think that the
Speaker 1: Christmas music for us, because we're a true court quartet.
Speaker 1: I think the fact that we can, you know, arrange
Speaker 1: all the harmonies and the vocal stacks that we like
Speaker 1: to do. We I feel like the Christmas music is
Speaker 1: our best stuff. So I appreciate the compliment. Every year
Speaker 1: I have to listen to it, I find it and
Speaker 1: I'm like, Okay, I love this song and totally superficially
Speaker 1: you're a tiny box, but you look fabulous. I thank you,
Speaker 1: very appreciate. I'm trying to keep up with the young bucks.
Speaker 1: You know, I'm about to turn forty nine here in
Speaker 1: a few days, so I'm trying to try to stay
Speaker 1: young and vibrants so we can, uh, we can still
Speaker 1: compete in our old age are anti created souls. I'm
Speaker 1: right behind you, so don't say old age, please you.
Speaker 1: And uh, I appreciate your time down and and asking
Speaker 1: me such great questions and the compliments to yeah, no problem.
Speaker 1: It's so great to me, you know, I'm I'm so
Speaker 1: happy to do it. Thank you, Okay, Hey, how are
Speaker 1: you good. How are you I'm doing I'm doing great. Thanks,
Speaker 1: Thanks a lot for hopping on with me. Yeah. So,
Speaker 1: being in the industry so long, we're all curious to
Speaker 1: know what is the one song you wish she never
Speaker 1: had to sing? Ever again, that's a good one. You know.
Speaker 1: I hate to sound like a corny person, but I
Speaker 1: love all the songs I mean, you know, especially the
Speaker 1: ones that were hits that you know, people say, oh
Speaker 1: my gosh, I'm so sick of singing I Do or
Speaker 1: Invisible Man or Hardest Thing or whatever the hit is
Speaker 1: or song that we've done. Um, it's actually the opposite.
Speaker 1: I used to not like singing some of the songs
Speaker 1: that we recorded back in the day in concert, like
Speaker 1: Dizzy or the Way You Want Me To, because I
Speaker 1: wanted to sing all the love songs and ballads. But
Speaker 1: now many years later, those are tempo dance songs. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think that they seem relevant now. So it's the opposite.
Speaker 1: I actually like singing more songs then the ones I
Speaker 1: don't like. I mean, you know, I wish I had
Speaker 1: a different answer and said, oh man, I hate singing
Speaker 1: because of you, but I get it. Joked out of
Speaker 1: it out of it every time because the crowd responds
Speaker 1: differently every time. And you know, look at this point
Speaker 1: you mentioned many years, many years later, for anybody to
Speaker 1: know any of the lyrics to any of our songs
Speaker 1: and back to us. I'm thrilled. That's awesome. My first
Speaker 1: concert was actually one of the All That tours of
Speaker 1: ninety eight degrees, so I'll never forget. Well, thanks, We're
Speaker 1: we're part of the world. Are you in? Where was
Speaker 1: that at UM in southern California? It was like before
Speaker 1: they tore down the Universal Amphitheater. Yeah, that's right, So
Speaker 1: that was And so you got Monica and the Keenan
Speaker 1: and kel and n that's fun. Well, I appreciate that. Geez,
Speaker 1: that's awesome. Thank you. Yeah, so glad you guys have
Speaker 1: all success witching many years ahead. Thank you guys for
Speaker 1: having such great anthems. Oh, I appreciate it, and I
Speaker 1: love the love. And thanks Joyce. I appreciate they appreciate
Speaker 1: the support seriously, Thanks Joyce, what great calls. We're gonna
Speaker 1: take a little break and we're gonna get right into
Speaker 1: the Q and A. So the question, the first question
Speaker 1: is how did I meet my beautiful wife, Amanda. It
Speaker 1: was very interesting. So a friend of mine, Jordan's Knights,
Speaker 1: who is a member of New Kids on the Block.
Speaker 1: He and I had been touring for a couple of
Speaker 1: years together as solo artists and having a lot of fun,
Speaker 1: and he asked me to be a part of this
Speaker 1: thing that he had called he was doing called Jordan's Idol,
Speaker 1: and jordan Idol was essentially a basically a version of
Speaker 1: his version of American Idol would where fans would come
Speaker 1: out and they would sing covers and then a winner
Speaker 1: of the contest would get to record with Jordan's and
Speaker 1: Jordan wanted me to be a judge. Well, I was
Speaker 1: really busy with my kids. I was going through going
Speaker 1: through a divorce and only had limited amounts of times
Speaker 1: time to spend with my kids. And at that time
Speaker 1: I was like, look, I get I have visitation with
Speaker 1: my kids. I can't make it. So Jordan was like, look,
Speaker 1: you have to be here, please bro do it. So
Speaker 1: I drove to l a um from Orange County and
Speaker 1: and um, you know, reluctantly went and uh and then
Speaker 1: judge this contest and my wife was there, my future
Speaker 1: wife was there at a v I P table, and
Speaker 1: I thought I was gonna be really, really cool, and
Speaker 1: I sauntered up to her like she was gonna know
Speaker 1: who I was, and said, hey, you must be one
Speaker 1: of Jordan's younger fans. And she was like, no, I'm
Speaker 1: in my thirties. You know you're by the way, you're
Speaker 1: sitting at my table, and she kind of dismissed me,
Speaker 1: which I was kind of like taking her back, and
Speaker 1: it was definitely a bruise to my ego. But I
Speaker 1: was like, hey, you know, what's your name? And she
Speaker 1: told me her name was Amanda, and she really kind
Speaker 1: of ignored me, and then her friend said, don't you
Speaker 1: know who this guy is. It's a guy from ninety degrees.
Speaker 1: So her exact words were, what do you want a cookie?
Speaker 1: So I was like, I walked my butt back to
Speaker 1: my own judgment judge chair and spent the rest of
Speaker 1: the night doing the doing the thing in the contest
Speaker 1: and all that. But on my way out she denies this,
Speaker 1: but she followed me. On my way out, I was
Speaker 1: going home to be with my kids and do their
Speaker 1: homework with them, and she said, hey, where are you going.
Speaker 1: I said, well, I gotta go home and be with
Speaker 1: my kids. And by the way, you didn't know who
Speaker 1: I was earlier. And then um, we didn't exchange numbers
Speaker 1: at the time, but we exchanged Twitter handles, and so
Speaker 1: I immediately d M her and was trying to chat
Speaker 1: her up, and I slid into the d M s
Speaker 1: and all that stuff. And then eventually I just started
Speaker 1: seeing her uh now and again on the road. It
Speaker 1: wasn't anything seriously I was taking seriously. I never really
Speaker 1: wanted to get married again. I was kind of disenchanted,
Speaker 1: disenchanted with relationships. But she was sweet, She really had
Speaker 1: her stuff together. She was a good mom, she was impressive,
Speaker 1: she didn't rely on me to do everything for her,
Speaker 1: and she was just there for me at a very
Speaker 1: rough time in my life. So um ended up being
Speaker 1: a blessing in disguise that I went to the jordanal
Speaker 1: event and she changed my life. The other question is
Speaker 1: how did I know I was ready to marry? Well,
Speaker 1: you know, look, I again, I didn't think I was
Speaker 1: ever going to get married again. I obviously I love
Speaker 1: women and and dating is okay, and and you know,
Speaker 1: sort of wanted to focus on being a father. But
Speaker 1: this person came into my life and completely changed it
Speaker 1: around for the better, almost effective immediately. And you know,
Speaker 1: I sat there and it kind of was like a
Speaker 1: revelation to me. I was visiting her in uh in
Speaker 1: l A. She was doing something, she was in the
Speaker 1: medical field, doing something, and I visited her at a
Speaker 1: restaurant at her hotel, and I thought, wow, you know, um,
Speaker 1: this one might be the one. I remember, you know,
Speaker 1: going home after hanging out with her and telling my parents, Man,
Speaker 1: I think this is gonna be the person that I
Speaker 1: end up you know, having a long term relationship with.
Speaker 1: And you know, eventually, very shortly thereafter, Um, we got married.
Speaker 1: We kind of just fell in love with each other
Speaker 1: and life got better with with both of us in
Speaker 1: each other's lives, and um, the rest is history totally
Speaker 1: changed my life around, all right. So the question is
Speaker 1: do men have a one track mind? Can they listen
Speaker 1: to women when they're also doing something else? Now, this
Speaker 1: is something you want to talk about pet peeves. We
Speaker 1: talked about pet peeves earlier, um, and one of the
Speaker 1: questions was my pet peeve, mine's lazy people? Well, probably
Speaker 1: my wife Amanda's pet peeve is the fact that I
Speaker 1: cannot do more than one thing at a time. If
Speaker 1: I'm crafting an email in my phone, I am literally
Speaker 1: hearing the words as I'm typing them, and she could
Speaker 1: be saying, well, you need to take the trash out
Speaker 1: or the pool guys gonna come, and I cannot hear
Speaker 1: anything else. So one track mind, it's kind of a rough,
Speaker 1: rough sort of term for that. I would say focus.
Speaker 1: I would say I'm focused on one thing, and I
Speaker 1: don't speak for all men. There are other guys that multitasks,
Speaker 1: can talk texts and you know, do all kinds of things.
Speaker 1: I have to be focused on whatever it is, and
Speaker 1: it doesn't necessarily have to do with being a man.
Speaker 1: It could be that I have like a d D
Speaker 1: and I have to like focus on that because if
Speaker 1: I start to focus on a bunch of other things
Speaker 1: that I can't pay attention. But in this case, I
Speaker 1: would say most men do have a one track mine.
Speaker 1: It's been wonderful spending time with you, great calls, great
Speaker 1: Q and A. I loved, you know, spending some time
Speaker 1: with everybody, and love the fact that twenty five years later,
Speaker 1: degree still has fans out there, and it's been a
Speaker 1: pleasure and honor for me to spend so much time
Speaker 1: with you, you probably learned a little bit too much.
Speaker 1: But one last thing I want to talk about is
Speaker 1: nine Degrees is gonna be on the road recording some
Speaker 1: new music. I have a new song out right now
Speaker 1: called Lit featuring Pompeii, debut number one on the iTunes
Speaker 1: Dance chart. I'm very, very proud of it. It's been
Speaker 1: a blast hanging out here on How Men Think. Thanks
Speaker 1: for having me, We'll see you soon. This is How
Speaker 1: Men Think and I Heart Radio London Audio Production. Listen
Speaker 1: each Thursday on the iHeart Radio app, Apple podcast or
Speaker 1: wherever you get your podcasts.