00:00:08
Speaker 1: Well, I invited you here. I thought I made myself perfectly clear. When you're a guest in my home, you gotta come to me empty.

00:00:23
Speaker 2: And I said, no, guests.

00:00:27
Speaker 1: Your presences presents enough. I already had too much stuff, So how do you dare to surbey me?

00:00:47
Speaker 3: Welcome to I said, no gifts. I'm Bridgard Wineger. I'm so happy you're here. I'm happy to be with you. The fire's roaring. I have holiday drinks set out, you know, cocoa, a variety of spiced liquids, the eggnog of horse room temperature water. I'm just kind of in a robe. Everyone's too afraid to say something. The tree is sparkling. There's a single cookie for each guest. Honor system. Please, I have the thermostat, said to eighty seven. And of course I've sealed the door so no one can get in or out. What a special episode this is going to be. My wonderful producer, An Lisa and I have rounded up a variety of guests that you might recall from past episodes, and what we have today is the podcast equivalent of a super Spreader event. Each of the guests to day have brought me a gift before. But the holidays, if nothing else, are a time for forgiveness. So I invited them all back and made them swear they wouldn't bring a gift this time by threatening legal action. For the next little while, it's going to be NonStop games. That's the deal here. We have Gift or a Curse. We've got Gift Master and a very special do or die lightning version of Gift or a Curse. A lot of big opinions this episode. Some will win, many will lose. If you have a moment as a little gift to me, why don't you rate and review this podcast? I mean, if you haven't done it already, shame on you. I ask for so little. This is the bare minimum you can do for me. And if you're surrounded by family, maybe corner someone recommend the show. Say you know, grandma, you got to listen to this podcast, and then remind them later about it. Maybe send them an email as well, you know, just keep reminding it's okay. If the relationship is permanently damaged. You're doing this for me. And look, I hope you're having a wonderful holiday season, fantastic time. Of course I do no matter what you celebrate. You've got your Christmases, your kwans As, your hanukkah Is, your Winter Solstices, your Boxing Days, your New Year's Eves. I'm sure I'm missing something unless you're listening to this episode at another time of year, in which case I don't know. Happy Easter, Happy Father's Day, Happy Halloween, Happy National Asthma and Allergy Awareness Month. Anyway, it's time to begin playing, so I need everyone to settle down and pay attention. First up, let's play a nice round of Gift Master with the terrific Lauren Lampkis. I feel like the last time we've played, we talked about Zachary ty Brian, Yes, and then he got shortly after was arrested. Yes, ran into some legal trouble. So we'll just hope that that doesn't happen in today's game.

00:03:55
Speaker 4: Well, hopefully something good happens to him now or not.

00:03:59
Speaker 3: You know, could be a bad guy. I feel like he is a bad guy.

00:04:02
Speaker 4: I don't know. I don't know. He played Brad with ease and a plum.

00:04:09
Speaker 3: Yeah. So with Gift Master, you know, I'll name the three potential gifts. I'll name the three celebrities. You'll tell me which gift you're going to give which celebrity and why so today, you know, and it is the holiday season, so you've got to be extra thoughtful. But the gifts you'll be giving are We've got a lot of experience gifts here. Well, actually maybe not. Let me just say we've got a healthy work life balance. That's one gift. Number two you'll be giving an ass that won't quit. And number three you'll be giving a frappuccino.

00:04:45
Speaker 4: Okay, that's a small or not that great.

00:04:50
Speaker 3: And you'll be giving them to the following people. Let's see here Bruno Mars, Pop Sensation, Bruno Mars. So when I adored Diane Wee. Oh I love her, fantastic actor. And number three we've got Prince Charles.

00:05:07
Speaker 4: Oh my god. Okay, this is really hard. Okay, well, two of the gifts are life changing and one is a frappuccino. So okay, So I love Diane Wee so much. I think she's one of the best actors of our time. And really no one's talking about her right now. She's fantastic. Everything she's ever been in, she's like amazing. I kind of imagine she's somebody who has a good work life balance because I feel like she chooses like really good projects. She's not always in something, but she's always in something good, right, And so she's probably not saying yes all the time to things. So I'm just gonna say that. And then Bruno Mars, I just don't. I don't really care about no offense, you don't adore no, I'm okay, but I and his songs do get stuck in my head. I haven't looked at his ass. I'm gonna guess that it won't quit because I feel like he dances a lot, so he's probably good. He probably doesn't have as good of a work life balance because he's a musician, and I feel like they work so hard in their aways doing shows and it's like a huge deal and they're touring and blah blah blah.

00:06:26
Speaker 3: He's in the super Bowl four times a year.

00:06:28
Speaker 4: Yes, I exactly. And then we have Prince Charles, who.

00:06:32
Speaker 2: How old is he?

00:06:34
Speaker 3: I'm gonna guess, uh what I'm picturing of Prince Charles. I'm gonna guess he's seventy one.

00:06:40
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was thinking for a second of the older one who.

00:06:43
Speaker 3: Passed, you know, yeah, Prince. We're talking about Prince Philip, who could be alive or dead.

00:06:47
Speaker 4: It's I know. All I know is that his corpse was writing in the back of a limo and a picture that I saw.

00:06:53
Speaker 3: That corpse has been in a lot of cars over the.

00:06:55
Speaker 4: Last a good picture. Okay, So Prince Charles is like in his seventies. He look, he doesn't work right.

00:07:05
Speaker 3: Hard to say he could have a little Etsy shop on the side. He's got a side household.

00:07:10
Speaker 4: Going Okay, here's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna give Prince Charles the frappucino because he probably doesn't go to is it Starbucks or is just a raputina?

00:07:19
Speaker 3: Is that Let's say it's a Starbucks frappucie.

00:07:22
Speaker 4: I'm gonna say he doesn't get to go to Starbucks ever, and he doesn't get to have like what the people have, right, so he always he has like a fancy person who makes him his own drinks. So this is like a special treat to have like a commoner's beverage. And then I'm going to give Bruno Mars the work life balance because he's very busy and maybe he doesn't have enough time for his personal life. And then I'm giving Dan we's the the ass that won't quit because she deserves it.

00:07:47
Speaker 3: At this point, she absolutely deserves it. She's earned it. I mean again, I can't I can't picture Diane's ass.

00:07:56
Speaker 4: She might already have one, and it's none of our business. No, it's none of our business what her ass looks like at all. But it wouldn't hurt to feel great about your ass. And if she has any doubts about it now, it won't quit.

00:08:10
Speaker 3: I think that's perfect. Bruno Mars. We can tell he's a workaholic. Time to take a break.

00:08:15
Speaker 4: He needs to relax.

00:08:17
Speaker 3: And yeah, then Charles is sipping at that preppuccino.

00:08:22
Speaker 4: I just love the idea of him just being delivered with his name spelled wrong, like a Starbucks drink. It's just charlel It's like Prince Charles.

00:08:35
Speaker 3: Well, you did it. I mean, you're always very thoughtful. You do it excellently every time, and this is no surprise.

00:08:43
Speaker 4: Well I try. You know I love to give gifts, and I know you always say no gifts, but you love to receive them. So it's your favorite time of year, no doubt.

00:08:52
Speaker 3: I'm having an excellent time I'm just wading through a sea of gifts and this kind of thing.

00:08:59
Speaker 4: I'm just going to say. One thing about the Christmas season is that I My thing right now that I'm getting excited about is wrapping gifts because so often we're mailing gifts online to each other where we don't get the gift wrapping, especially because of COVID we weren't traveling. Everyone's just getting packages in the mail with a little receipt that has a message on it. I'm going to wrap the gifts and I'm going to hand deliver the gifts.

00:09:20
Speaker 3: This is the wow.

00:09:21
Speaker 4: I mean, if I can, unless it's people out of state. But I'm saying I'm not ordering something to be delivered to somebody at this point right when.

00:09:28
Speaker 3: I mean, because everyone can just order themselves something and get another.

00:09:31
Speaker 4: It's not that exciting, exactly. It's so fun to and I have all this wrapping paper I never use, so I'm excited to use it.

00:09:37
Speaker 3: Are you a good rapper?

00:09:38
Speaker 4: I'm pretty good. I'm pretty good. I grew up wrapping gifts with my mom, and I understand the importance of a tight corner. I'm so jealous, but sometimes I phone it in and I just kind of like, let it be smushy and I don't really care.

00:09:53
Speaker 3: Well, do you have any holiday wishes you'd like to send out?

00:09:59
Speaker 4: Yo, Santa. No, I have a baby now, so this is my first Christmas with a baby, and so this is very, very exciting to me because I love holidays, I love traditions, and I'm really excited to start traditions with my baby. So that's my my dream and wish for this Christmas season is my own. It's just about me.

00:10:25
Speaker 3: Oh okay, well, now our next guest contestant is none other than the very funny Danielle Perez. Danielle. The last time we spoke, my half of my face was numb from the dentist. But today it's the holidays. We're gonna have a lovely time. We're playing do or die Gift or a Curse. I'm gonna name one thing. You're gonna tell me if it's a gift or a curse and why, and that I'm going to tell you if you won the game or not.

00:10:52
Speaker 5: I love one shot.

00:10:54
Speaker 2: I love just having one shot.

00:11:00
Speaker 3: You could go either way darker light, but it is a holiday season, so hopefully you'll win. But who knows, So here we go, gift her a curse. Friends and family sales. So these are the friends and family sales that you'll get an email like, I don't know, j Crew, friends and family gift you a curse.

00:11:21
Speaker 5: Honestly a curse.

00:11:23
Speaker 6: You buy too much, you go too hard, You're left with the impulse to.

00:11:30
Speaker 7: Go, yeah, I love that color.

00:11:34
Speaker 8: That color is gonna look great on me, and you're you have a short true sweater. You can't even give it away and wait out of it.

00:11:46
Speaker 3: Danielle excellent. I mean that's not the logic I'm using here. I do think they're a curse, but the reason I think they're a curse so I don't feel like these are really friends and family sales. I feel like if I am an actual friend or family of the you know, the gap employee, I'm getting a better discount. People, Are it waters the whole thing down? We've got to think of a new term for this. You can't just blast out an email to one hundred thousand people calling them friends and family.

00:12:14
Speaker 8: It's just now yeah, it really it is diluting the whole like friend and family tier.

00:12:21
Speaker 2: I haven't thought of that.

00:12:22
Speaker 3: Wow, right, I don't want to become friends with you know, the Uniclo employee. Uh, and then find out that everyone's a friends and family.

00:12:31
Speaker 5: Everyone's a fan friend. For those two weeks, we're all friends and family.

00:12:35
Speaker 6: No, thank you, we're in the meeting, stuck in the same store, making impulse purchases, acting on our base instincts, leaving the place that we have like inhabited for the last few hours, just like in shambles.

00:12:51
Speaker 2: And for what fifteen friends and family behavior?

00:12:55
Speaker 6: For god, oh my god, Okay, fifteen percent off is not a friends in fais what I'm talking about.

00:12:59
Speaker 3: I think a lot of these things acting as a friends and family, and you're getting fifteen percent. Now if I'm if you're gonna call me a friend or a family member, you're gonna give me thirty percent minimum. Let's talk fifty percent.

00:13:14
Speaker 4: Okay, see fifty Now we're friends and family.

00:13:17
Speaker 5: Yes, Now, I mean that's like incle.

00:13:19
Speaker 3: We're basically married.

00:13:20
Speaker 5: Yes, if a brand would like to marry me and be open to that.

00:13:27
Speaker 3: Reach out, get down and you know, get on bended knee and ask Danielle to marry you.

00:13:35
Speaker 6: That's all I'm Let's make this thing legit. Come on, Living in sin fenty Beauty get it together.

00:13:45
Speaker 3: Excellently played, Danielle. I mean you just knocked it out of the park. It's nice when the end of the year you get it a little win. Yes, another lightning round version of gift a curse with John Gabris. Okay, gift or a curse Gabrius, and please be careful. We don't want you to ruin the twenty twenty one for yourself and the holidays are shattered. Gift a curse. Tall sandwiches.

00:14:17
Speaker 9: Tall sandwiches.

00:14:19
Speaker 3: You know we're talking Scooby Doo style giant tall sandwiches.

00:14:25
Speaker 10: Okay, Well, here's the thing. My favorite food in the world is sandwiches. So by design, just the noun without the modifier hits me and I go gift. But the thing is the one thing a sandwich shouldn't be now and I like a lot of meat and a lot of bullshit on my sandwiches, But the one thing a sandwich shouldn't be is tall.

00:14:52
Speaker 9: I think you can.

00:14:52
Speaker 10: Go longer, bigger, thicker, white, but taller. And I have a huge I have a huge mouth brand, but I don't even like to have like I like a fat sandwich, Like I'm a New Yorker. When you get sandwiches anywhere besides New York, it's like, yeah, we got some turkey and cheese and New York it's like you get if you get a cream cheese bagel, you get like an inch and a half of cream cheese, and I fucking love that. But there is a limit to the height of a like no one goes, oh, dude, my deli. You gotta love this place. They have the tallest sandwiches like that. No one, So I'll go with curse.

00:15:31
Speaker 3: You absolutely got it. I mean, what a beautiful fuck.

00:15:35
Speaker 10: Yes, I was really worried for a second.

00:15:37
Speaker 2: Holy shit, this is fucking great.

00:15:40
Speaker 3: I adore a sandwich, but a tall sandwich is the worst possible experience any sandwich where I have to break it down without my mouth.

00:15:47
Speaker 11: Mm hm.

00:15:48
Speaker 3: The only thing I should be using is my mouth to break down the sandwich. Chewing, chewing, chewing.

00:15:53
Speaker 10: I don't hate if some like mayoed up chicken cutlet shoots out the back and I gotta do a little restrike, that's right.

00:16:00
Speaker 3: But if you got your fucking.

00:16:01
Speaker 10: Shits so stacked where it's like, yeah, I got to bite through eleven layers to fucking fuck that.

00:16:07
Speaker 3: Uh no, absolute curse. They look fantastic. Of course, it's a beautiful thing. Impossible to eat. It doesn't work. It works against what the nature of the product even is. Tall sandwiches. We've got to get away from it. No, thank fuck that excellent job, you did it.

00:16:24
Speaker 10: Happy holidays, Oh amazing, Happy holidays do you today?

00:16:33
Speaker 3: Well look who it is. Everyone loves him, We love him. It's Oscar Montoya. Happy holidays.

00:16:42
Speaker 2: Oh, happy holidays.

00:16:43
Speaker 12: It's so thank you so much for taking the time out of your busy schedule to meet with me during the holidays.

00:16:48
Speaker 3: Well, I've got, you know, various balls and gallows that I'm kind of skipping between. But I just keep my dress.

00:16:55
Speaker 2: Ont forget the masquerades.

00:16:58
Speaker 3: My masquerade Christmas balls that I'm at. Are you ready for a do or die gift or a curse?

00:17:05
Speaker 2: Absolutely?

00:17:06
Speaker 3: Oh, we'll see Oscar gift or a curse. Now, this is an interesting one. Golden rod. Are you familiar with golden rod?

00:17:17
Speaker 12: The color? I know, golden rod? The color is that? Is there something out? Is it just golden rod? From you know the paper that's the color of golden rod?

00:17:29
Speaker 2: Exactly?

00:17:30
Speaker 12: Okay, Okay, I think it's Uh, it's a it's a gift. It's absolutely gift. And why it's a cute. It's not an offensive color, you know what I mean. It's a it's a nice subtle color. Uh, it's a nice gift. It makes people think like, oh, I'm thinking about you. You know, it could have been like shit brown, and it's not. It's golden Rod. So I think it there there's limitless options. Golden Rod is I think one of the better choices you can you can gift someone.

00:17:57
Speaker 3: Oscar, Oh, you came in with this confidence and you're so wrong. Golden Rod is a curse. The public schools system has ruined Golden Rod.

00:18:08
Speaker 9: For me.

00:18:08
Speaker 3: When I see the color Golden Road, all I think of is a worksheet, a word search, or something to take home to mom to sign. It's an absolute curse.

00:18:18
Speaker 12: Okay, yeah, I'm sorry. Yes, actually you're completely right.

00:18:22
Speaker 9: Yes, you know.

00:18:24
Speaker 3: The holidays are forgiving, but they're also for apologizing.

00:18:27
Speaker 9: I appreciate that.

00:18:28
Speaker 12: Sorry, I'm coming clean and I'm being honest with myself, and for that, I am sorry.

00:18:33
Speaker 2: I apologize.

00:18:33
Speaker 13: Bit.

00:18:34
Speaker 2: Golden Rod is in fact a curse.

00:18:37
Speaker 3: Look, you you've kind of bottomed out at the end of twenty twenty one. But that just means twenty twenty two you can start a new you can just you have a fresh page of Golden Rod, right exactly.

00:18:48
Speaker 12: I can't get any lower than I am right now.

00:18:51
Speaker 2: That's a good point.

00:18:52
Speaker 3: Bridger, Well, look, all I can say at this point is happy holidays, and holidays does something to cheer you up. Okay, we're headed into our next guest contestant someone who I just adore, Carl Tart. Carl, Hello, are you ready to play do or die? Gift or a curse?

00:19:22
Speaker 9: I absolutely am.

00:19:23
Speaker 3: Now, Carl, I'm gonna name one thing. You're gonna tell me if it's a gift or a curse? And why are you? Just please prepare yourself. Let's say listener suggestions. Some one named Katie wrote in gift or a curse? A baby you don't know waving to you in public?

00:19:41
Speaker 14: Is that is one gift? Cause see a lot of people I hear are pet people. I'm not a pet person, but I'm a baby person. Like I love a good baby.

00:19:53
Speaker 2: They cute.

00:19:53
Speaker 9: They all cute. Some people will be like some baby's ugly.

00:19:55
Speaker 14: Babies's ugly when they first come out nah, Man, babies be cute out here, you know, and a baby waving to me, and a baby waving to me in public, this is this is this is too sweet. But it makes me feel like I have a good soul. I feel like they see the good in people.

00:20:17
Speaker 3: Right, They haven't quite developed cynicism yet.

00:20:21
Speaker 9: Yeah, yeah, so I like, I love a baby. I think that is a gift.

00:20:28
Speaker 2: Carl.

00:20:29
Speaker 3: It's the holidays, so I hate to deliver this news. Oh no, it's a curse, of course. I mean, babies are very cute, and it's a fun surprise to see a baby waving to you. But there's it's so complicated. It's like is the baby is it a joke? Are they making fun of me?

00:20:46
Speaker 9: What is?

00:20:46
Speaker 3: What's the baby's actual game? And now what do I owe the baby? Do I wave back? And then people are like, what's this adult man waving to the baby doing? It's It creates such a complicated web almost immediately, and I think I know what. I think the baby knows what they're doing. They're getting you in trouble, they're getting me in trouble, or they're at least making me out there. I just do I come over and talk to the baby. Then the parent is saying, why are you talking to my baby? It's a trap. Ye, it's an absolute trap. Of course, we appreciate the attempt by babies who maybe just purely want to wave, but I feel like a lot of babies just are trying to, you know, create a situation.

00:21:28
Speaker 9: Understood, understood, all right? I was wrong. I was wrong. I'm starting off on the badfoot, all.

00:21:33
Speaker 3: Right, not starting off ending on a bad foot. This is do or die, and you have failed. Carl, Oh, dang it, Well, do you have any holiday wishes to.

00:21:46
Speaker 9: Give?

00:21:47
Speaker 14: I wish that all the babies who wave that you are doing it from a place of goodness and doing it from a place of kindness and not trying to get you in trouble as an adult man waving at a baby.

00:21:59
Speaker 3: I think that's a great wish, Carl, Haydays.

00:22:02
Speaker 9: Happy holidays to you, Bridge, Thank you.

00:22:13
Speaker 3: Our next guest contestant is Matt Ingebrets, and Matt, happy holidays.

00:22:21
Speaker 11: Bridge. Why are we doing this because.

00:22:23
Speaker 3: Of the holiday season?

00:22:25
Speaker 11: Matt, Oh, it's a holiday season.

00:22:27
Speaker 2: I forgot.

00:22:28
Speaker 11: I forgot it was a holiday season.

00:22:30
Speaker 3: Well, I forgot. You were a scrooge, a grinch, this person as a heart of coal. But you know, everyone should be involved in the holidays. And I'm so happy that you can be here and we can try to warm your spirits.

00:22:44
Speaker 11: I'm glad to be here too, but I do I resent you for dragging me out of bed for what some podcast Christmas morning.

00:22:54
Speaker 3: There are presents under the tree. Today we're going to play gift. I'm gonna name three potential gifts things you can give away, and I'm going to name three celebrities people you're gonna give them to. You're gonna tell me which gift you're going to give which celebrity and why. And more than ever, you need to be thoughtful about this because it is the holiday season. So you don't want anyone going to bed tonight thinking that Santa didn't care. Okay, Matt, these are the three gifts you will be giving today. Number one is a stylish purse, Number two is a thirty six month lease on a Buick enclave, and number three is an eternity in hell. Now you will be giving these gifts to the following people. And yeah, obviously some of these are experiences, some of them are gifts, but that's you know, you have to run the gamut with gift giving. You'll be giving them to the following people. Dame Maggie Smith, the legendary Dame Maggie Smith.

00:23:56
Speaker 11: Okay.

00:23:56
Speaker 3: Number two someone who's more dog royalty. See Milan the dog Whisperer.

00:24:02
Speaker 9: Okay, he you know, he.

00:24:04
Speaker 3: Trains pets for a living, the dumb the dog guy. And number three is Michelle Branch.

00:24:12
Speaker 11: Michelle Branch.

00:24:14
Speaker 3: You know that everywhere song I'm.

00:24:16
Speaker 11: On Google it looks like Michelle Branch is married to one of the men from the Black Keys. Okay, congratulations and also maybe too bad for you.

00:24:28
Speaker 3: So what you're doing is you're defining a woman by her male partner.

00:24:33
Speaker 11: Yeah yeah, and thanks for putting it that way, doing me a big favor. You dragged me out of bed and accused me of being a misogynist. What a podcast this is.

00:24:49
Speaker 3: Okay, We've got Dame Maggie Smith. We all know her, Caesar Milan, He's trained to countless dogs. And then of course Michelle Branch. We're a little foggy on who she is, but we have enough of an idea.

00:25:02
Speaker 7: Wow.

00:25:03
Speaker 2: Okay, well, I mean.

00:25:07
Speaker 11: I guess Dame Maggie Smith I like the most out of this group. I'm a fan of her from such things as Harry Potter end of list.

00:25:22
Speaker 3: That's kind of where she got her start.

00:25:25
Speaker 11: Dame Maggie Smith, congratulations, you're getting a stylish purse.

00:25:31
Speaker 3: You don't think when that day Maggie Smith doesn't have six closets of stylish purses.

00:25:37
Speaker 11: She's probably collected a lot of stylish purses. Now, when you say stylish purse, are you picturing like what like something from Target that's cute but inexpensive, or are you picturings like Gucci or something like that.

00:25:51
Speaker 3: I'm not giving the gift away. I have to show and you get to decide what type of handbag, what price range.

00:26:01
Speaker 11: If I were to have to give a purse to somebody, it would stress me out so much because it's it's like perses. The problem with purses is they do You can find a cute purse, but it's more of a status symbol a lot of the time, and it's like, did you spend two grand on this purse? But I think, to be honest, no offense to anybody out there. If you're buying into that, you're a lost person and you need to reevaluate your belief system.

00:26:26
Speaker 3: I guess I'll burn all of my purses.

00:26:30
Speaker 9: Okay.

00:26:30
Speaker 11: So Dave Maggie Smith, congratulations, you get a purse. You don't need. Put it in the closet. You're I can't imagine you're leaving the house very much these days.

00:26:40
Speaker 3: Wow, you've just come for day. Maggie Smith, you might as well have sent her to helling.

00:26:45
Speaker 2: This person, I am.

00:26:47
Speaker 11: I am realizing I'm being I'm ornery right now. I guess I didn't realize it, but in talking to you, you're bringing out a spitefulness in me that I didn't realize I had this morning.

00:26:59
Speaker 3: Welcome to every one of my relationships. Okay, So Dave Maggie gets the purse. I actually can't argue with that, and she probably has a lot, but she could easily regift that, and she seems generous. It was that seems like it makes sense to me.

00:27:15
Speaker 11: Now, this is now, These are some tough decisions we have to make. Here a Buick a thirty six month lease on a Buick enclave.

00:27:24
Speaker 3: That's three years in. What I believe is you know, seat seven people. This is I believe is a huge car.

00:27:31
Speaker 11: I'm looking at it now. Yeah, it looks like the modern day suburban. Okay, Well, Caesar Milan, he's you know, carting around dogs all the time, and so maybe he needs that space. You know, he throws down a couple of blankets in the back seat. You know, the dogs can have some room to breathe back there. Michelle Branch I don't know any thing about her life at all, except that I saw her in a photo with one of the people from the Black Keys, and she sang a song that I've already forgotten. I have to say, that's one of those songs that when it comes on, I'm like, catchy tune, sounds good, and then it gets stuck in my head in a way that upsets me, in the way that certain pop music does, where it keeps going and it won't stop, and it creates sort of a hellish experience for me. And so for that reason, I'm going to banish Michelle to an eternity in hell.

00:28:36
Speaker 3: Oh my god, she's gonna be heartbroken.

00:28:39
Speaker 11: Well, Michelle, you should have thought of that before you made a song that was good, but more so than being good, just catchy, and actually that's not always a good thing.

00:28:50
Speaker 3: I will say this about an eternity in Hell, maybe we just look at it as an experience. It's more of a trip. It's a you know, you make of it what you can. It's like a bad vacation, and there's good in everything. There's probably you know, you every town has a good restaurant. I'm sure there's If you spend enough time in Hell, you're going to find you know, the little hidden spots and you know, cafes and eating.

00:29:19
Speaker 11: You've got a Chili's and you know what, Chili's is great. I ate there in high school all the time and I loved.

00:29:25
Speaker 3: It, right, And you know, a lot of people don't get to go to Hell, so it's kind of a there's a lot of fomo there for a lot of people. And this is kind of to know you're going to Hell. I think that that there's some luxury to that.

00:29:41
Speaker 11: It would be freeing in a way because it's like, okay, I'm going to Hell. Well now I can really start living life to the fullest or in whatever way I want to do. I want, I want to go on a killing spree. I can now because it doesn't matter what lies.

00:29:57
Speaker 3: In the heart of Michelle Branch. It's hard to say, Matt, you did an excellent job. Well, I'll bet I'm gonna walk that back. You did a fine job.

00:30:08
Speaker 2: I did a fine job.

00:30:09
Speaker 11: I mean, to be honest, A lot of these people mean, you know, don't come into my you know, perview very often. Dame Maggie Smith. Again, she's the one I guess I think about the most. But if I'm being completely honest, I probably haven't thought about her in years.

00:30:23
Speaker 3: Well you have that poster of her behind you. Well I can see right into your zoom Matt, bless you, bless you? And uh yes, happy holidays, Happy holidays. Why don't we play a lightning round of gift or a curse with Sam Richardson Sam Gift or a curse faux exposed brick curse? So and why it's Christopher for a few reason.

00:31:00
Speaker 15: And first of like, let's not lie about what is behind the paint on our walls, guys. Let's not get the habit of lying about these things. Whatever the structure will make up of our home is, we'll just accept that, okay.

00:31:14
Speaker 2: Uh Also, uh so, so you take you take a self in your home?

00:31:20
Speaker 15: Right, Somebody's like, I can't wait to come to your house and see if it's exposed brick.

00:31:25
Speaker 2: They get it. Now you are a liar. And even if you have it all over every wall, they're like, wait a minut, where's the dust?

00:31:31
Speaker 15: Where's the natural residual dust that comes from having exposed brick? It's not to be anywhere? Was this is this paper? It's not even just paper. It's like glossy. It's like glossy paper. Now you're an Now you have an enemy on your hands.

00:31:45
Speaker 5: Curse, it's a curse.

00:31:48
Speaker 3: Sam, I hate to hear this. What an awful answer. You're wrong? Oh soo exposed brick. You can turn any environment into your own person old Pirates of the Caribbean. You can make your home in olive garden. Look you built. Let's say you built your house in two thousand and seven. What's stopping you from making it feel like a Mimi's cafe? Get the faux exposed brick in there. Everybody loves it. Oh, it's an absolute gift. Every home should just have endless exposed faux faux exposed brick. We love how it looks. Everybody adores it authentic. Uh, you know, it really gives a theme park feel to almost any room.

00:32:30
Speaker 15: Oh this was it was all going so well, wasn't it.

00:32:36
Speaker 3: Well, that's your opinion, and you're wrong. Faux exposed brick is a gift from beginning to end. No, Sam, move on, I can't look. You're a sore loser. It's not my problem.

00:32:53
Speaker 15: So the second I go to the you have full exposed brick, and I go and I see that you have something nailed into that brick, like you're saying a painting from it. I'm like, how'd you do this? It's brick. You're lying. What else is a lie in this place?

00:33:08
Speaker 3: Well, but then you at least had the fun illusion of looking at a nail right into brick for a moment in time. Your reality was one where brick could hold up a painting.

00:33:18
Speaker 15: And so then I take I carry that into the real world all of a sudden, because I'm like, oh, the rules are different.

00:33:22
Speaker 9: All of a sudden.

00:33:23
Speaker 15: Now I guess I thought it was impossible. Now it's possible. I need to hang up his painting in this brick wall.

00:33:30
Speaker 2: I'll just go.

00:33:30
Speaker 15: I'll just take the one nail, please home depot. It should be good.

00:33:34
Speaker 9: Just the one nail.

00:33:36
Speaker 2: Close my credit card.

00:33:37
Speaker 3: Let me do it, Let me do it. I can do it.

00:33:39
Speaker 7: I can do it.

00:33:39
Speaker 2: I can actually do it. Don't worry.

00:33:40
Speaker 9: Please get off my back.

00:33:41
Speaker 2: People are coming over at seven.

00:33:43
Speaker 15: It's six thirty eight.

00:33:45
Speaker 2: I can do this myself.

00:33:48
Speaker 3: Well, Sam, I hate to hear it. The world hates to hear it. But you know, occasionally you're wrong, and that's fine.

00:33:54
Speaker 11: I disagree.

00:33:56
Speaker 2: I think time will tell.

00:33:58
Speaker 16: Time will tell them when the aliens come down and they were like, please take me to your brick walls, and then and then the wire will be like I have it and they're like, oh, wait a minute.

00:34:10
Speaker 2: Oh, it's gonna be embarrassing for all of us.

00:34:14
Speaker 3: Well, just know that when you come to my house, I'm gonna know that you hate all of my foe exposed brick and I'm gonna be so uncomfortable.

00:34:20
Speaker 9: I'm gonna say it, like, what is this in your home?

00:34:26
Speaker 2: Was the David Busters?

00:34:33
Speaker 3: Now it's Do or Die Gift to a Curse with Jessica Gow Jessica.

00:34:38
Speaker 7: Oh Bridger, you do plusit as bitch.

00:34:43
Speaker 3: So nice to see you.

00:34:44
Speaker 5: I can't wait for this.

00:34:46
Speaker 13: I was so excited to have this opportunity to redeem myself because the last time I was on your show, I was not told the full rules of this game.

00:34:55
Speaker 3: Well you were, you were absolutely told everything you needed to know, and you drop the ball. You can't keep just projecting your failures onto me. So this is going to be a do or die and we'll see who's who comes out on top.

00:35:11
Speaker 17: Here.

00:35:11
Speaker 11: Yeah, let's see a good or evil triumphs today.

00:35:16
Speaker 3: Okay, Well, here we go. It's gift or a curse?

00:35:19
Speaker 9: Gift?

00:35:19
Speaker 3: Your a curse confetti in birthday cards?

00:35:23
Speaker 11: Oh? Obvious curse? Are you kidding?

00:35:27
Speaker 3: And why?

00:35:29
Speaker 7: Well you know.

00:35:29
Speaker 13: Here's the thing, though, it depends on your POV. It's obvious it's a gift for a vengeful person like myself, because I will absolutely send that to only people that I hate because it'll ruin It won't just ruin their day, it'll ruin their lives, especially if they have like carpet or something, you know, depending on where they open it. But if you're on the receiving end, it's of course a curse. You might as well send them a grenade.

00:35:53
Speaker 3: Well, look, you can't just say both sides here. I need I need a definitive answer from Jessica.

00:36:00
Speaker 9: Goo.

00:36:01
Speaker 2: Fine, it's a curse.

00:36:03
Speaker 3: Oh I hate to hear it. You've lost the game. You a gift.

00:36:11
Speaker 13: Because you're on the giving end.

00:36:13
Speaker 2: That's why I.

00:36:14
Speaker 3: Love to watch somebody open that card. The smaller confetti the better, Just pack it full. There's an explosion, a mess.

00:36:25
Speaker 13: You just wait till I test out this answer. You will be receiving a confetti card from me every day for the rest of your very short life.

00:36:36
Speaker 3: Well, this just you're giving me a little heads up. I will never carpet my home.

00:36:42
Speaker 13: And you had all the swatches picked to have just shag carpeting from wall to wall.

00:36:48
Speaker 3: My carpet chopper is going to be so disappointed to hear this. But you know she and I were going to part ways at some point, so.

00:36:57
Speaker 13: Because you had sent her a confetti card. I bet that's why you were gonna.

00:37:00
Speaker 9: Buy a way.

00:37:02
Speaker 3: You've absolutely lost the game, and it's a horrible way to end twenty twenty one. The listener's heart goes out to you. My heart goes out to you. But happy holidays.

00:37:14
Speaker 13: I can't wait to see you sing a different tune when you receive a special package from me.

00:37:25
Speaker 3: Well, the party continues. I'm having the time of my life. We're all in a real holiday mood, and we're going to walk over to our dear friend Caroline Goldfarb. Caroline, how are the holidays treating you?

00:37:41
Speaker 7: My Honakah was festive? Thanks for asking, fantastic and I'm so excited to see you in this wonderful holiday season.

00:37:50
Speaker 3: Now, are you ready to play gift or a curse? So ready gift or a curse? Cottage cheese? Oh, and I should say that's from a listener. A listener named Sarah Jane suggested that.

00:38:06
Speaker 7: Cottage cheese.

00:38:07
Speaker 18: It's so funny you ask me this because it just so happens.

00:38:11
Speaker 5: I'm going through kind of a cottage.

00:38:13
Speaker 7: Cheese phase right now. So I'm going to say, beyond a shadow of a doubt, it's a gift. Am I allowed to say why?

00:38:23
Speaker 9: I will?

00:38:23
Speaker 3: I hope you'll say why. You can't just leave the party with that of a it's a gift and then you leave, I mean the door slams.

00:38:31
Speaker 7: That would be like the ultimate party foul.

00:38:33
Speaker 18: Just screaming cottage cheese is a gift and walking out that it's actually.

00:38:37
Speaker 3: A fantastic exit, and.

00:38:39
Speaker 7: We call that.

00:38:40
Speaker 5: Some people do an Irish goodbye.

00:38:42
Speaker 18: I do the cottage goodbye, and it's just screaming about cottage cheese and leaving the.

00:38:46
Speaker 3: Party, and then she died on her way home.

00:38:49
Speaker 2: She choked on cottage cheese.

00:38:51
Speaker 18: Loose cottage cheese that she carries in her pockets.

00:38:54
Speaker 19: So weird.

00:38:56
Speaker 7: Anyway, she was kind of cool, I guess, so cottage cheese to me.

00:39:01
Speaker 18: Of course, we all know it's kind of the ugly stepsister of the dairy community.

00:39:08
Speaker 7: You know, milk gets milk gets its dew.

00:39:11
Speaker 2: Yogurt, of course, gets its flowers.

00:39:13
Speaker 7: Sour cream has a spot in the dairy pantheon. But cottage cheese is.

00:39:19
Speaker 18: I think it's underrated and it doesn't.

00:39:24
Speaker 7: Get its praise.

00:39:24
Speaker 18: Let me sing its praises for a moment. Cottage cheese, pound for pound, probably the best source of dairy based protein for my money, the protein. Look at the macros on cottage cheese. Next time you're at the grocery store, do me a favor. Read down that list. Tell me you don't see a shocking amount of protein, and you can.

00:39:42
Speaker 7: Really it's a great base for me.

00:39:46
Speaker 2: You can throw some, you know, in the same.

00:39:48
Speaker 18: Way yogurt can be your parfe based Try it with cottage cheese next time.

00:39:51
Speaker 7: Put some jam on it. Put some nuts for crunch. You know, don't be afraid to take a walk on the cottage side.

00:39:58
Speaker 5: Is all I have to say.

00:40:00
Speaker 7: Cottage core.

00:40:02
Speaker 20: Yeah, that's what I'm all about this holiday season, Caroline.

00:40:06
Speaker 3: I could listen to you talk about cottage cheese for another hour and a half.

00:40:11
Speaker 7: This has been five minutes on it.

00:40:13
Speaker 3: If you want me to you're starting up a PowerPoint.

00:40:18
Speaker 2: Look we can.

00:40:19
Speaker 3: I'm happy to continue talking about this because I'm I'm obviously I need to reveal right now the correct answer. Yes, it's a gift. We love cottage cheese in this household. What is there? What is there not to like about it? It makes me feel like I'm bored in the seventies. I've got my diet cheese that I'm eating out of the fridge. It tastes fantastic. I think there. You know, from about two thousand and one till three years ago, no one was eating cottage cheese. I think it's making its way back into our refrigerators. We're realizing it's a snack for literally any time of the day. You can have it in the morning, you can have it at midnight. You can also I may have covered this subject on this podcas before, but whatever happened to the midnight snack? I really the midnight snack was a plot device in every nineties commercial, and then it vanished from memory. We've got to bring back the midnight snack. Cottage cheese.

00:41:12
Speaker 18: The midnight snack I think got replaced by the ambient snack, and it's time to bring back the midnight snack.

00:41:18
Speaker 7: And I do want to speak to your point, Bridger, Cottage cheese is cyclical.

00:41:23
Speaker 18: It's really you know, trends may come and go, but cottage cheese is forever.

00:41:30
Speaker 11: You know.

00:41:31
Speaker 18: You might think it's out, but don't think it's out until you count it back in.

00:41:34
Speaker 3: You know, it's absolutely packed with protein. Look, I don't like to put a sweet thing on it. You're bringing up this putting jam on it. I don't know that I can cross that line. I like it more as a savory snack.

00:41:45
Speaker 7: Did I blow your mind for a second.

00:41:48
Speaker 21: I grew up in a freaky cottage cheese choiced household where my dad would make something I'll say it, the curse of all curses, with cottage sheet, an abominable cottage cheese snack he would combine. He claims he learned this growing up in the sixties. I guess so a savory cottage cheese snack.

00:42:10
Speaker 18: Cottage cheese, ketchup salsa mixed together until it's like a reddish chunky.

00:42:20
Speaker 7: With bits of salsa. World that I've been to a tortilla.

00:42:23
Speaker 18: I have seen him eat it many times.

00:42:26
Speaker 11: Crazy.

00:42:27
Speaker 3: That's not just as desperate snack for him. That's something he was doing regularly.

00:42:31
Speaker 7: He craves it. It's one of his favorites. All I'm saying is it's versatile.

00:42:36
Speaker 5: Don't be afraid to add.

00:42:37
Speaker 7: Your own spin to it. Bridger likes it plain. I like it a little sweet. My dad likes it with all kinds of things. It's chunky too. We can't get that texture. Come on, it's funky.

00:42:49
Speaker 3: Look, there's no other food that resembles it.

00:42:52
Speaker 7: I can't think of one.

00:42:54
Speaker 3: Not in the dairy category. Any other dairy thing that's that texture has gone rotten smooth.

00:42:59
Speaker 7: Oh right too, I'm so ober dairy being smooth. It's like obvious choice.

00:43:04
Speaker 2: Much.

00:43:06
Speaker 3: Yeah, cottage cheese really pushes it out there. Sometimes yogurt will get into a weird textural thing, and we don't want that to have a texture. We want a smoother yogurt. Cottage cheese just kind of owns it. It makes me feel like I should get on my exercycle.

00:43:21
Speaker 2: You know, it's like I'm lumpy.

00:43:24
Speaker 7: Get used to it. That's cottage Cheese's motto.

00:43:27
Speaker 3: Oh my god, you've I've had a feeling. I saw cottage cheese there. I thought Caroline is going to have the exact answer that everyone needs to hear here, and hopefully this is just the beginning of cottage cheese just becoming kind of a permanent thing in everyone's life. We don't need it to fall out of fashion again.

00:43:47
Speaker 18: No, don't let cottage cheese go the way of bell bottoms in the dinosaurs.

00:43:53
Speaker 7: Open your arms. This Habliday's season. Let it into your fridge. And Bridger, I'm so happy you asked me.

00:43:59
Speaker 18: And I only speaks to what the Hanukkah and holiday season is all about for me, and that's.

00:44:04
Speaker 7: Bringing your A game to your friends podcasts.

00:44:10
Speaker 11: And I think I.

00:44:10
Speaker 7: Did just that.

00:44:16
Speaker 3: Okay, here comes the next person that's willing to play Gift or a Curse, do or Die. It's Lizzie Cooperman. Lizzie, Welcome to the helpit.

00:44:27
Speaker 2: Ridger.

00:44:27
Speaker 19: I can't believe I'm here. I'm loving every minute of it.

00:44:31
Speaker 3: You're glowing. You're looking out on the ocean.

00:44:35
Speaker 22: I am coming to you live from La Joya. Behind me. Some gorgeous grainy beach.

00:44:40
Speaker 19: Photography could use a Paris filter.

00:44:47
Speaker 3: Lizzie, we're gonna play or die, gift a curse? Are you prepared?

00:44:53
Speaker 22: I mean as ready as I'll ever be.

00:44:56
Speaker 3: Okay, Oh, this is from a listener. Someone named Landon has suggested gift or a curse passion fruit.

00:45:05
Speaker 22: Okay, I'm gonna say as a flavor, curse.

00:45:11
Speaker 7: Passion fruit.

00:45:13
Speaker 22: You're neither here nor there.

00:45:14
Speaker 19: As I say this, I realize I literally just voiced passion fruit in a nice tea commercial.

00:45:21
Speaker 22: It's so crazy, and I'm going into a curse.

00:45:24
Speaker 2: I was passion fruit.

00:45:26
Speaker 22: So this is actually a self hating decision I'm making. This is wild.

00:45:30
Speaker 5: I can't believely said this.

00:45:31
Speaker 22: What I'm thinking about is in Lacroix.

00:45:33
Speaker 19: Whenever I get passion fruit, I feel like I'm drinking gum.

00:45:37
Speaker 3: Right, although I would say with almost all Lacroix, I feel like I'm drinking like someone left a piece of gum at the bottom of a can. Do you really Yeah? I find it fine. It's not an offensive drink, but the flavor is barely there. Hmm, So Lizzie you feel so Your answer though, is curse.

00:45:59
Speaker 22: Yeah, pat iced tea aside passion fruit.

00:46:04
Speaker 3: Curse, Lizzie, incredible, it's I think passion fruit is a curse. And I'll tell you why. Every third item that is baked on The Great British Bakeoff is a passion fruit flavored something. Why is this happening? Why is passion fruit always the go to fruit for desserts? The British have got They've they're hooked, and I We've got to It feels like such an easy choice at this point on the Bakeoff. No one really knows what passion fruit tastes like. I can't well, yeah, I'll say that no one knows, and so I don't want to know. I don't want you know, a cake with a passion fruit curd or a pie with a passion fruit slime.

00:46:50
Speaker 19: I've never heard you say the word curd before, and my ears are just adjusted.

00:46:56
Speaker 23: And my soul.

00:46:57
Speaker 3: I don't know that I've ever said curd aloud. This may be a historical moment. It felt like a first.

00:47:05
Speaker 19: The passion for it is just in my life. I feel like it's a cover up for a flavor. They couldn't decide what to call it. They were just like, I don't know, what do you think this tastes like? Passing it around the room. They're like, tastes like spoiled Kiwi, maybe boiled or spoiled? Oh, spoiled, spoiled?

00:47:27
Speaker 3: And is it like a slimy texture?

00:47:29
Speaker 22: I actually would not be able to pick one out of a crowd.

00:47:32
Speaker 9: Wow. Oh, I would not.

00:47:35
Speaker 19: Be able to nail a passion fruit down if I saw one running free in the forest.

00:47:42
Speaker 3: Lizzie did a fantastic job. And I'm so happy to have you here for the holidays, and I hope you have a wonderful season.

00:47:51
Speaker 22: Thank you for having me.

00:47:57
Speaker 3: Now we're going to be playing gift Master with a guest that I adore. It's Jenny Yang. Jenny. I'm gonna name three potential gifts things you can give away, Yeah, and three celebrities. You're gonna tell me which gift you'll give which celebrity and why. The three gifts you're gonna be giving are going to be an uneventful road trip. So just a road trip where almost nothing happens. Yep, a job at Not Scary Farm. So this is the Halloween version of Nott's Berry Farm. So it's kind of a temporary position and they're probably gonna be kind of spooking people's right.

00:48:31
Speaker 4: Theme park.

00:48:31
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a theme park that's also a haunted house. I've never been. I wouldn't mind trying it. And number three is a pizza stone. Are you familiar with a pizza stone?

00:48:41
Speaker 24: I'm very familiar with the pizza giant rock. You put in your oven and heat up and then throw pizza on. Yeah, flat slab right right, and you'll be giving them to the following celebrities. Let's see here, how about you'll be giving them to Machine Gun Kelly Okay, MGK, Nancy Pelosi, Nancy Pelosi and R.

00:49:01
Speaker 3: L Stein.

00:49:03
Speaker 25: R l Stein.

00:49:04
Speaker 26: I would imagine that R. L Stein would excel as a staff member of Not Scary Farm. Oh yeah, I think that's an incredible connection right there. He could almost be like the designer. He could be the designer.

00:49:17
Speaker 3: I feel like there's a collab waiting to happen. Somebody's dropped the ball.

00:49:21
Speaker 26: A live immersive horror experience curated.

00:49:26
Speaker 25: And designed by R. L. Stein.

00:49:28
Speaker 3: I believe you're a master of horror.

00:49:30
Speaker 26: Yeah, so I believe that he would be an excellent staff member for that experience. I would say between Nancy Pelosi and Machine Gun Kelly, which I truly still don't understand why we're talking about machine Gun Kelly so much.

00:49:43
Speaker 25: I don't.

00:49:44
Speaker 26: I think I even try to look him up on Wikipedia, and I still I'm confused about why we're talking about him other than the fact that he's dating publicly trying to be very sexy with, you know, a hot lady.

00:49:54
Speaker 25: Wait, who is it again that he's dating or Megan Fox?

00:49:58
Speaker 3: Megan Fox?

00:49:59
Speaker 26: Okay, they like to lick tongues for photos. It's you know, it's a whole thing. But I don't know what he does. So machine Gun Kelly and Nancy Pelosi uneventful road trip or piece of stone, Okay, I would like to see machine Gun Kelly sent off to nowhere. So I think I would send him on a sort of uneventful road trip. I truly do believe he needs to take a break from the limelight right now.

00:50:26
Speaker 3: Yeah, just if we could just like waste it. It's just like give him a task that doesn't nobody gets to pay any attention to.

00:50:34
Speaker 25: Yeah, just a mundane trip somewhere to Santa Clarita.

00:50:37
Speaker 3: Right, put him in a subaru and send him cross country. Yeah, nothing happens, right, we don't hear about it.

00:50:43
Speaker 25: Yeah, he's just eating truck stop food. It's great.

00:50:46
Speaker 3: I bet he's already eating truck stop food. That's the one thing I know about machine gun Kelly is his diet.

00:50:50
Speaker 25: He looks like he looks like he does right, right, and that's his vibe.

00:50:54
Speaker 3: Those is the food he eats comes from like under a heat lamp in a gas station.

00:50:58
Speaker 26: I mean, I know too much. But Megan Fox cooks vegetarian food and vegan food for the both of them. Oh, he'll eat healthier.

00:51:05
Speaker 3: I stand corrected.

00:51:06
Speaker 25: Machine.

00:51:06
Speaker 3: But is that does it go by machine machine.

00:51:09
Speaker 25: A machine gun? Or is it machine? Middle name gun? Last name Kelly? Is it machine first named gun Kelly Mashie. I don't know.

00:51:18
Speaker 3: It's hard to say.

00:51:19
Speaker 25: I don't know.

00:51:19
Speaker 26: So I would send him off to a boring road trip because we don't need him in the spotlight anymore. Really, And then I feel like Nancy Pelosi. I would love it for her to enjoy just a nice, crusty pizza at her leisure because she uh, probably lives a very stressful life.

00:51:38
Speaker 3: Yeah, she probably does, Lee does, and maybe it's time to warm up. Just a stone in the oven, yeah, throw some dough in the air to see her tossing pizza dough.

00:51:47
Speaker 25: Yeah, some yeasty dough.

00:51:48
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's just like an old Italian chef.

00:51:51
Speaker 7: Yeah.

00:51:51
Speaker 26: And Italian, I mean yeah, Pelosi probably Italian. It all connects, you know what. This is not a racial filing decision, but it is truly because I feel like she probably avoids carbs because she likes to live a healthy life as this sort of high powered politician who's always on the go. But I do feel like with the level of stress she's under, she deserves.

00:52:16
Speaker 3: Carbs absolutely, and I can see her this could be a late in life pivot to Pelosi's pizzas.

00:52:24
Speaker 9: Happen.

00:52:24
Speaker 25: I would totally eat it a Pelosi's pizzas.

00:52:27
Speaker 3: Nancy, you've got it waiting for you, I mean, given you. We've given Nancy a gift here, I mean, probably got plenty of money already, but why not make some more off of the pizza excellently played? What thank you excellently?

00:52:40
Speaker 25: I live for that.

00:52:41
Speaker 26: I live for verbal affirmation. Affirmation gift giving disappoint a. Gift giving is not one of my top skills in terms of but.

00:52:50
Speaker 3: I mean, maybe you just need to be giving more gifts to celebrities. Okay maybe, oh okay, Well, the party rages on. I'm you know, I'm feeling great and you're feeling great. We're just all having a blast. And now we're going to talk to Jen Spyra Jen Ridge holidays.

00:53:19
Speaker 7: Thank you so much, sir. Happy holidays to you.

00:53:23
Speaker 3: How have your holidays?

00:53:24
Speaker 11: Ben?

00:53:24
Speaker 7: Thank you for asking.

00:53:26
Speaker 27: You know, my I celebrated the final line of Honikah. I celebrated it very very modestly. Well, I you know, I only.

00:53:38
Speaker 7: Because I was sort of traveling.

00:53:40
Speaker 27: I only got back in the apartment for the last night, and that's where the manora was, so I lit it. But unfortunately, and it's a good thing that my husband literally just stepped out the door.

00:53:50
Speaker 7: We quickly quarreled about.

00:53:53
Speaker 27: The way that I set up the manora and that I was going to get wax all over the credenza and he was going to have to fucking clean. So that actually it ended up with me very quickly blowing out all the candles and it was very sad.

00:54:09
Speaker 7: And then like later secretly I realized so actually it was.

00:54:14
Speaker 5: A very It was a very.

00:54:16
Speaker 3: Sad, this hidden honka you celebrated exactly. Well, Jen, I think we should play gift or a curse, do or die? Uh, You've got one chance, Jenn Spira, Gift or a curse? Salsa bars.

00:54:39
Speaker 27: Okay, I'm immediately saying curse. And I don't even know what we're talking about, because are you talking about a place you go to salsa dance?

00:54:51
Speaker 3: I am talking about in a Mexican restaurant, essentially a small buffet featuring a variety of salt which you self serve, pouring into traditionally a little plastic cup tinging back to your table to dump all over your food.

00:55:09
Speaker 27: All right, listen, I am very boldly going to say what I know will be the wrong answer, because I know what you must think.

00:55:16
Speaker 7: I'm going to say it's.

00:55:17
Speaker 27: A gift, printer, because I am all about because I am all about the buffet life anytime it has offered more choices at my fingertips where I don't have to have an interaction with someone where I need to explain why I want something. So like the sovereignty, the autonomy, and the variety, even though actually when you first described it, I'm like, I hate that idea. It's gross. It actually kind of grosses me out. I don't even want to be in a place where there is a salsa bar. I don't like any of it. But ultimately I have to come down on yes to choice and yes to freedom because I am the daughter of George Washington and I love freedom. So fuck you, bred jer because I know you think it's I know you can.

00:56:05
Speaker 7: Get a curse or am I wrong?

00:56:10
Speaker 3: Genspira Oh a chill, A chill is in the air. Salsa bars. Look, you've mounted an excellent defense, and now I think what you're you're about to hear is going to be very surprising, and it's going to be something you remember for a long time, and it'll probably be something that kind of is the subtext of every one of our interactions moving forward. Salsa bars are a curse because I adore, adore a salsa bar. I love to choose my salsas. I love to have the control over how much of the red sauce of the salsaverde, of the pico de gayo, of the pickled carrots and jalapenos that I get. That said, I don't know that they exist anymore. I think because of the pandemic, we may never I think they may be extinct and therefore a curse, a curse that will haunt me for the rest of my life.

00:57:14
Speaker 27: Ridger, I found this topic psychotic because, like, what you're saying is a Chipotle?

00:57:22
Speaker 7: Like I've seen Chipotle.

00:57:24
Speaker 27: What fucking restaurant do you go to where that it has a salsa bar in it?

00:57:27
Speaker 13: Like?

00:57:28
Speaker 7: Is this just an la thing?

00:57:29
Speaker 3: Are you talking about?

00:57:30
Speaker 7: Ponder Rosa?

00:57:32
Speaker 27: Like seriously, I don't know what you're talking about, and I like, what are you talking about?

00:57:36
Speaker 3: I guess we should. We should say Jenna's in New York, where Mexican food is good. Mexican food is hard to come by. I guess you're right, because you're also you're you're displaying a huge ignorance here. What are you saying? That's a Chipotle Chipotle the employee is deciding.

00:57:55
Speaker 7: How much exactly exactly And okay, listen.

00:57:58
Speaker 3: It's not a salsa bar.

00:58:00
Speaker 27: Well, Bridger, So I wasn't a Chipola today? My husband meets there every single days. How he stays alive he goes and gets for every single day.

00:58:09
Speaker 7: That's amazing. I love that you gets that every day.

00:58:11
Speaker 2: That's great.

00:58:12
Speaker 27: It is, But we Bridge are like, listen, you're talking to a girl that loves a golden Corral, that loves a ponderosa.

00:58:18
Speaker 7: You're talking to someone.

00:58:18
Speaker 27: Who fucking I like those very very low bar for entry buffet, family style buffet for let's say, a certain class of people.

00:58:32
Speaker 7: Okay, I like that.

00:58:33
Speaker 27: Bridger, Like, I actually have never been in a Mexican restaurant that has a salsa bar.

00:58:37
Speaker 3: You're talking about this is shocking a casual and listen.

00:58:40
Speaker 7: In an la like you are you talking about Bridger?

00:58:45
Speaker 3: About Terry's Mexican Grill in Studio City. They had a beautiful salsa bar which I can't access. I have to ask the employees for extra salsa over and over, making me a nuisance. I now have this. It's like my wife is dead and I'm just thinking about her all the time exactly.

00:59:03
Speaker 7: So really you're you said, dude, it's a curse, but really it's such a gift that it's just like that. It's it's yeah, It's absence is a curse.

00:59:12
Speaker 3: It's absence is a curse. I returned to its grave and just cry and talk to it.

00:59:19
Speaker 7: Oh my god.

00:59:19
Speaker 27: Well, thank you for teaching me about salsa bars and about you and I I'm ashamed.

00:59:27
Speaker 7: I hope I didn't.

00:59:27
Speaker 27: I hope I didn't, like, you know, to get canceled because I seem so like insensitive, but I didn't know about this type of restaurant.

00:59:36
Speaker 3: Well, you're only canceled in my heart.

00:59:39
Speaker 2: Thank you.

00:59:39
Speaker 27: And also, I'm not even trying to belittle or make fun of the idea of cancel culture. I don't know why I keep saying words and talking, but I'm not trying to even say that cancel culture is silly.

00:59:49
Speaker 7: I'm actually not saying that.

00:59:53
Speaker 3: You you're stumbling through my party, just saying nonsense. It's embarrassing. Other guests are uncomfortable. I'm saying I had to invite her. I didn't have any choice. We go back. I'm trying to push her out of my life, and now she's here ranting about salsaars she clearly can't even picture in her own mind.

01:00:15
Speaker 7: I know, I'm so I'm so simple.

01:00:19
Speaker 3: Well, Jen, I hate the fact that you have embarrassed yourself, but I do love that you've learned.

01:00:26
Speaker 7: Thank you. I have learned.

01:00:28
Speaker 16: I have learned a lot.

01:00:30
Speaker 3: All learning should take place through embarrassment. That's kind of my policy.

01:00:36
Speaker 7: I completely agree. It really does teach a lesson.

01:00:40
Speaker 27: That feeling, that feeling inside, the heat that rises it imparts a lesson.

01:00:46
Speaker 3: Well, I hope you can take that lesson with you into the new year and just a big happy holidays in general. I just love you, I adore. I'm so glad you were here.

01:00:56
Speaker 7: Thank you so much for having me.

01:00:58
Speaker 27: And I am sorry that I embarrassed you, that.

01:01:03
Speaker 3: You embarrassed me. No, no, no, no, I lead too pure of a life to be to feel others embarrassment.

01:01:11
Speaker 7: Indeed.

01:01:12
Speaker 3: Indeed, Well, the festivities continue. We're having a fantastic time and things could not go wrong if we tried, especially now because we've got John Milstein. John, are you ready for do or die? Gift or a curse?

01:01:35
Speaker 28: As ready as I'll ever be. I'm excited to be your celebrating Christmas as one of my favorite I hope this is okay, say little.

01:01:40
Speaker 3: Elves, John, I need you to be serious here, Okay, sorry, there's no room for error.

01:01:49
Speaker 2: Okay, got it.

01:01:50
Speaker 3: I'm gonna name one thing you're gonna tell me if it's a gift or a curse and why, and then we're gonna find out how the rest of your year is going to play out.

01:01:59
Speaker 2: Okay, song, whether I succeed or not.

01:02:01
Speaker 3: Exactly Wow, Okay, gift or a curse. Houses decorated with lights that flash and sync with a song.

01:02:13
Speaker 28: So this is a product that is sold and it just is able to take in the sound of a song that's playing and make the lights flash with the song.

01:02:22
Speaker 3: John, I don't know the science behind these houses.

01:02:26
Speaker 2: You're an audio engineer or a lighting engineer.

01:02:31
Speaker 3: Basically, what happens is somebody goes into the garage and gathers up whatever lights they have, they get on the roof, they decorate the house for their holiday of choosing. Then somehow it gets connected to some sort of audio device and then suddenly the lights are flashing, the music's playing. It's kind of a little ballet that they've constructed on their house. Actually, Analyse is sending me a YouTube, but let me look at this really quick Christmas lights.

01:03:03
Speaker 11: It is.

01:03:06
Speaker 28: Oh my god, this is far more involved than I ever could have imagined.

01:03:12
Speaker 3: This is way beyond what I thought it was.

01:03:15
Speaker 2: Wow. This is.

01:03:18
Speaker 28: It looks like this is someone's entire year's salary went into their homes for these. Okay, so after watching the video, I now even have a better sense of how extra this this sort of display is. This is the ultimate goal is definitely to get on Ellen, and pretty much everybody who buys this kit thinks that they'll be able to get on Ellen. Although these look like they're custom, I mean it looks like in order to get this you have to like really talk talk to a lighting manufacturer.

01:03:50
Speaker 3: You have got to go to a at least a tech school to learn how to put together one of these displays.

01:03:57
Speaker 28: This is George Lucas made Star Wars, and then some of the people who helped make Star Wars years and years from then have vel owed this sort of technology to exist. But it all began on Star Wars.

01:04:10
Speaker 3: So what do you think, gift or a curse?

01:04:13
Speaker 2: It's a clear gift to me.

01:04:14
Speaker 28: I mean, I don't see anything negative about driving by one of these houses. You know, you don't have to. Probably it's a thing where you see it once or twice. It's not very likely that this house would be next years and you'd always have to be watching the full ballet light ballet happening beginning to end, which seems to be like an hour long playlist. So yeah, I'm going to enjoy any type of Christmas lights that I see on a house. And if they're going this extra mile to make it sonic like I like it even more.

01:04:50
Speaker 2: So it's a gift.

01:04:51
Speaker 3: John, I love to hear this from you. I absolutely think they're a gift for so many reasons. Look, I'll take a flashing light just like a broken light at a seven eleven flashing I'm thrilled to see it. It brings a party atmosphere.

01:05:06
Speaker 2: Is a horsefly in that sense, You're like a moth.

01:05:10
Speaker 3: And I love to be driving down the street and a street lamp is kind of just going off and and then you bring in the Christmas element to the holiday element. It's creating a traffic jam in neighborhoods that I find very funny. You know that some neighbor is furious about it. It's an active aggression. No matter what you do.

01:05:34
Speaker 28: It creates a sort of entrenches hierarchies in neighborhoods. Who is sort of the king of that? Yeah, yeah, so that's good.

01:05:46
Speaker 3: And any as you said, any naked attempt to end up on Ellen or the Kelly Clarkson show, we support, We're behind it.

01:05:55
Speaker 28: No, I feel like a lot of the attempts to get on Ellen Kelly Clarkson involve making a child do something that maybe they don't want to do, a child being used as some sort of prop. So this is a child children are not taking advantage of to make this Ellen.

01:06:13
Speaker 3: Right. I assume there's probably a decent amount of child labor. Dad out the lights and the kids have to spend six saturdays in a row putting up the lights. But at least they're not on camera. Right, John, you did a fantastic job. I mean, you nailed it.

01:06:30
Speaker 28: Oh my gosh, one shot like this is this is probably the most higher pressure environment I'll ever be in.

01:06:36
Speaker 3: Oh I've seen several people just absolutely break down in tears. We're not even gonna be able to release that audio. Careers could have been ruined.

01:06:47
Speaker 9: Wow.

01:06:48
Speaker 3: Do you have any holiday wishes you'd like to you know, send to loved ones listeners.

01:06:55
Speaker 28: You know, I say, get out there and travel. You know we've been we've been under lockdown. You have your vaccine, maybe you have your booster it's time to start living our lives again. Like I'm going as close to antivacs. It's close to it. No, but seriously, I don't know. Yeah, enjoy Christmas like enjoy enjoy. I'm so glad that we get to be with our families and travel and stuff like that.

01:07:21
Speaker 3: Again, that's a real sweet message, John, and I appreciate that. You know, I feel like you've kind of after not losing the game, you've got a new lease on life.

01:07:32
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was.

01:07:33
Speaker 28: I was prepared to, yeah, be one of those people in tears with audio that has to be burned. But yeah, you know, I feel like I feel like I'm good at this game. Like I feel like if you were to throw me three more, I get them, all right.

01:07:48
Speaker 3: I don't know tempting fate absolutely, And I.

01:07:53
Speaker 28: Know that I know that you have a long list of people you have to get to, so I know I want have to deliver on that promise.

01:07:57
Speaker 2: But just let the listeners know, like you know I would continue to win.

01:08:01
Speaker 3: Well, I'm not gonna you know, my generous heart is not going to let you embarrass yourself with a loss here. I want you to have a happy holiday season. I want you to go into twenty twenty two with your head held high.

01:08:15
Speaker 2: And so I'm gonna let you Thank you. Richard.

01:08:22
Speaker 3: Our next contestant is Fantastic and also holds the record for giving me the most amount of gifts on this podcast to this very day. She co hosts The Fantastic Podcast at Decartes. It's Kulop Vilyisac.

01:08:38
Speaker 29: Hello, I'm so excited. Last time we spent I don't know, two hours together. Let's go for four four hours.

01:08:46
Speaker 3: Well, too bad, Coulop. This is do or die. I feel like you're already trying to get ahead of the game. Last time you got two out of three and we ended up with we really came to blows over badgers. This is do or die. Gift or a cursor. You've got one chance to end the year on a good note.

01:09:03
Speaker 29: Okay, and this one thing we can talk about for.

01:09:08
Speaker 4: A long time.

01:09:11
Speaker 3: All Right, here we go. Gift or a curse. Appetizers with an odd number of food items. You know you're getting like your five mozzarellisticks.

01:09:21
Speaker 29: That's a curse because if you're not alone and you're with one other person, like I want things to be fair, you know, like equal pay.

01:09:35
Speaker 3: Equal pay and appetizers and hot apps.

01:09:41
Speaker 2: Isn't that why we marched cool up?

01:09:48
Speaker 4: You're wrong?

01:09:50
Speaker 3: Number of appetizers on a plate is absolutely a gift. When that plate of five chicken wings gets placed in front of you, there's a and an immediate tension. It brings a nice natural drama to the table. Suddenly everyone's wondering what's going to happen unless there are five people, But then everyone's getting the smallest portion, the beautiful just thrill of thinking how are we going to split this? Or who is going to be the greedy little pig who takes the final one. They're absolutely a gift. It's a free gift from the restaurant. They're saying, here's a little spark for your evening pressure.

01:10:31
Speaker 29: Not all of us live your sort of knives out mentality where all quadrants of your life need to be filled with this drama and intrigue and Chris Evans in a gorgeous cable knit like that's not for everybody.

01:10:48
Speaker 3: Bridger, Well, it's because I think a lot of people haven't tried. Once they do, once they get this high octane lifestyle that I'm kind of just always soaking in, They're going to realize what was I doing with the last few decades. I've wasted so much of my life.

01:11:06
Speaker 2: True, I'm so.

01:11:07
Speaker 3: Sorry to hear that you're ending the year not only losing the game, but then desperately just clying, clying to succeed, trying to convince me of anything but the truth. You know this does not bode well for twenty twenty two for you, just for me. Can I pull you down as well? Nobody pulls me down, but I hold on to an ankle and you can kick.

01:11:38
Speaker 29: As much as I know you love to live at such a heightened, tension filled existence, I actually don't want you to be harmed.

01:11:48
Speaker 3: I appreciate that.

01:11:50
Speaker 20: Happy holidays, really happy holidays. God bless us everyone. Okay, well we're going to continue here with our next guest contestant, someone who I adore. What a person to spend the holidays with. It's Naomi ek Perican.

01:12:14
Speaker 3: Naomi. It's time for Gift or a Curse, Do or Die Thrill Zone. I'm really ready KWANSA Edition gift of course. Yes, now, you were the first person to ever win this game.

01:12:27
Speaker 9: Wow, I didn't know that.

01:12:29
Speaker 3: Yes, I think about four people have now won. But considering that we've done eighty something episodes, you're in rare company with three people I can't remember.

01:12:39
Speaker 30: Perfect and that's exactly how it should be me and three nobody's.

01:12:43
Speaker 3: Absolutely faceless people. Well, so you know this is very high stakes for you. So I just want you to be more careful than ever. Kind of just look into whatever strength you used before, etc.

01:12:59
Speaker 30: Yep, Up, you're right. I have a title to defend you. Yes, I'm gonna get right. I'm gonna get I'm gonna connect to a higher power right now to truly make sure that the spirit moves me in the right direction exactly.

01:13:12
Speaker 3: And let's let's just get into it. Gift or a curse. Saying my pleasure instead of your welcome.

01:13:21
Speaker 17: Hmmm.

01:13:24
Speaker 4: Hmmm, saying my pleasure instead of your welcome.

01:13:28
Speaker 9: Honestly, I think that's a gift.

01:13:30
Speaker 2: I think that's a gift.

01:13:31
Speaker 30: There's something about saying my pleasure that's like, oh, so you enjoyed it too, you.

01:13:36
Speaker 2: Know what I mean? Now it's like, okay, cool, So.

01:13:39
Speaker 30: Now I don't feel like I just took I feel like I brought something to the table for you, which you know could be a lie.

01:13:45
Speaker 3: You're telling me but thank you for telling me that, Lie, Naomi, The streak continues. Yes, it's a gift, and I'll say it. You know, what you're saying here is kind of speaks to the reason I think it's a gift. I think there's something a little perverse about saying my pleasure, saying that you've got a little happiness out out of whatever you did for someone. There's something slightly sick, something that when someone says that they're revealing something that they got something more out of it than just doing a favor.

01:14:18
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was.

01:14:19
Speaker 3: It wasn't just I'm doing this for you. It was a little I'm doing this for me. And well it's sexy, isn't it. It's a little sexy.

01:14:27
Speaker 9: It's a little sexy.

01:14:30
Speaker 3: We all need a little bit of sexiness, a little bit of just throwing us off balance when we thank someone. If you know, if my person at Chipotle says my pleasure, I'm thinking, oh no, the dynamic between me and this cashier is psychosexual.

01:14:49
Speaker 9: Oh my god.

01:14:50
Speaker 30: You know how I feel about psychosexual games, and they're one of my favorites. I believe that people are constantly playing a psychosexual game in some form or another. And because I'm sex negative, I usually don't come out on top. But I love them and so I very much yes agree with you.

01:15:06
Speaker 3: I have a psycho sexual game. Number two for me is a game of cat and mouse. If I can get into one of those games with the retail employee, my trip to the mall is perfect. Naomi, I can't believe it. You just keep winning this game. At some point I'm going to throw a something in the road to trip you.

01:15:26
Speaker 30: I don't think you will. You want to know why, because I think that we are soul sisters. We share a mind and I think what you think. So there's no way. There's no way you can trip me up.

01:15:36
Speaker 3: It is a game of cat and mouse, is true, or a game of cat and cat. But you know, whatever, you've done it, You've ended the year on a perfect note. Thank you so much. Happy holidays, Happy holidays.

01:15:51
Speaker 25: I hope you watch my Netflix half hour.

01:15:53
Speaker 3: Watch her half hour four times. It's coming out December twenty ninth.

01:15:59
Speaker 2: Thank you very much.

01:16:00
Speaker 9: As accurate. You should watch it four times.

01:16:01
Speaker 3: Or just turn it on and just give it a thumbs up. You can leave the room like I really don't care if you engage with the content, but I would like you to watch it.

01:16:09
Speaker 9: You know what I'm saying.

01:16:10
Speaker 3: I didn't know you could give thumbs up on Netflix.

01:16:12
Speaker 30: Yeah, you can rate it and you give a thumbs up or a thumbs down. And it's funny because I went into everyone's Netflix queue that I had access to, and I gave Dave Chappelle special thumbs down just because I was like, Mom, you're giving him a thumbs down. Mum's husband, you're givinghim a thumbs down. But for mine, I don't need to give it a thumbs up.

01:16:32
Speaker 3: Yoh, Everyone go give her special Netflix a thumbs up and then go to bed and have dreams of whatever holiday dreams that you want. Sugar plum fairies, is that what you dream of during the holidays?

01:16:48
Speaker 30: I mean, that's what I hear. You know, I dream I'm dreaming of a white Kwanza. Okay, dream like I never knew.

01:17:01
Speaker 3: Oh, I can't believe it. Here we are the final round. The holidays are still here. We're deep deep into the episode and our next guests are going to go head to head in a new version of Gift or a Curse and it's going to be interesting. It's going to be cutthroat and the results could be devastating. It's Karen Gilgareff and Georgia Heart start you Tay. Are you ready for Gift or a Curse?

01:17:33
Speaker 20: Yeah?

01:17:33
Speaker 5: I kin, I'm filled with electricity.

01:17:35
Speaker 3: Yes, let me explain how this is going to work you too, Gift or a Curse? We've played it dozens and dozens of times on the show. You know past guests are kind of competing with each other psychically. This is the first in person physical competition of this game. So I'm going to name three things, and you're both going to tell me if they're a gift or a curse. You're going to have to do that at the same time. This is all in fairness, So you'll tell me if they're a gift, you're a curse, and then I'm going to give you each a chance to defend your answer, and then I'm going to tell you the correct answer. So you know, you could both walk away total losers. You could walk away winners. You could walk away with a point here or there. This could go in any direction, so as always be careful. Are you ready?

01:18:28
Speaker 17: I have to say that just being on this show makes me not a loser, sad I can't do anything, but when from here.

01:18:35
Speaker 3: That's the one promise the show can guarantee. Okay, well, let's just get into it. Let's start with the first gift or a curse Andy's mints?

01:18:46
Speaker 4: Oh ready, yes, guess curse?

01:18:53
Speaker 3: Okay, and why Georgia you spoke first? Let's hear your defense.

01:18:59
Speaker 17: I love them. They conjure memories from being a kid. There was this amazing Mexican restaurant my dad would take us to called El Carmon in Los Angeles, and like, if we were well behaved, they'd give us one, Like they wouldn't even charge us to the.

01:19:16
Speaker 4: Quarter or whatever.

01:19:18
Speaker 11: Uh.

01:19:18
Speaker 4: And I loved I love them. They're so good.

01:19:22
Speaker 17: I'm like offended that you don't like them.

01:19:24
Speaker 3: Here, Karen, we've offended Georgia and we need a defense.

01:19:29
Speaker 23: Yes, yes, because I have an olympiad mindset, and I knew that getting her off her, getting on her back foot and offending.

01:19:38
Speaker 5: Her for the outseet would be the way to go.

01:19:42
Speaker 23: I had two great aunts who lived across town from us growing up, Aunt Man Aunt Anne, wonderful women. They had a selection of candy at their house that was just what they liked and the range of those. That selection was applets and cottlets, which is one of the most disgusting candy. It barely doesn't it barely qualifies as a candy because it was jelly apple candy or apricot candy jellies with walnut floating in it and sugar on top. That's the one candy that was available. The other candy was Andy's Mints Andy's Candies, and so we over ate Andy's Candies to make up for the fact that we couldn't have.

01:20:26
Speaker 5: The other one.

01:20:27
Speaker 23: Like it was as if there was this candy array, but we would just be like, fine, eat that.

01:20:32
Speaker 5: But I don't like mint.

01:20:34
Speaker 23: I think mint in candies tastes like you didn't rinse your mouth of toothpaste and now you've moved on to chocolate.

01:20:41
Speaker 5: I don't like the combination. Never have. And so we.

01:20:45
Speaker 23: Would eat Andy's candies almost against our will, because we're like, well, it's.

01:20:49
Speaker 5: The only candy we're going to get around here, so you might as well just eat it.

01:20:53
Speaker 23: I have nothing but bad memories, although I respect a restaurant that would give it to you for free, because that's looks really saying something about what good behavior you must have been on.

01:21:04
Speaker 17: Well, it's a great way to get three hyperactive kids to fucking shut the fuck up and eat their food and be quiet. The promise of an Andy's Mint at the end, which was a hard thing for my brother and sister and I to do.

01:21:17
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know it worked. Oh okay, you too, well, point to Georgia Karen. Andy's Mints are you don't bring the memories of your aunt's House of Horrors onto my podcast? Are pure sophistication. Yes, smooth chocolate with a light mint and excellent combination. I recently learned that they're a product of the tutsi roll company, which, I'll be honest cheapened the entire thing for me, but I'm not backing off. I would go to the soucassa Mexican restaurant, and they would have the quarter Andy's Mints, a nice little after dinner you know, if it's between an Andy's mint and a what is that a dinner mint? A pillow mint?

01:22:02
Speaker 4: Oh, starlight starlight mint?

01:22:05
Speaker 9: Right?

01:22:05
Speaker 3: No, thank you? There?

01:22:09
Speaker 5: Yeah, they're all gross.

01:22:13
Speaker 3: Okay, well, look they're an absolute gift. Yes, that's okay. We've got one to zero here. There's still two chances for Karen to redeem herself.

01:22:24
Speaker 23: This next question is about applets and cottlets. I'm screwed, that's for sure.

01:22:30
Speaker 17: I have to try thoughts and truly four old people.

01:22:35
Speaker 3: That sounds horrifying.

01:22:39
Speaker 23: It's like depression candy. Yeah, period of time and the emotional set point.

01:22:45
Speaker 3: Yes, your aunt's house was the last place that was. We're seeing.

01:22:51
Speaker 23: Well those books ever sold in nineteen seventy eight, yes.

01:22:55
Speaker 3: All right. Next up, this is a listener's suggestion. Someone named Aaron has written in Gift your curse crocs the footwear crocs.

01:23:04
Speaker 17: Ooh, Karen, I say curse.

01:23:07
Speaker 4: I say curse too.

01:23:09
Speaker 12: Well.

01:23:09
Speaker 17: Yeah, Look I can argue the other side if you want me to, because I can.

01:23:13
Speaker 3: This is them about making decisions and living with them. You both said crocs. Yeah, I mean you've both said curse.

01:23:20
Speaker 5: Yeah.

01:23:20
Speaker 3: Is that correct?

01:23:21
Speaker 2: Yes?

01:23:22
Speaker 3: Yes, I want to have that defense.

01:23:24
Speaker 5: Curse.

01:23:25
Speaker 17: Okay, I'm going to say gift, but I'll explain why.

01:23:29
Speaker 3: Okay, Georgia. Just for the record, you are in a gift, Karen is curse?

01:23:33
Speaker 5: Okay, Okay.

01:23:35
Speaker 23: I defend my position by saying crocs are rubber shoes. Although cushy, your feet sweat you can't make.

01:23:44
Speaker 5: Holes big enough on those shoes. You can.

01:23:48
Speaker 23: You can dress them up with adorn them with jewels if you want to, which I guess the kids do these days. Be ironic and wear them with beautiful dresses. Do whatever you want, obviously in this the time that we're living in. But for me personally, that shoe is it needs a sock, which makes everything even worse. It's a goofy clown shoe that makes your sweaty feet even sweatier.

01:24:13
Speaker 5: There's no relief in the summer. It's a visual assault.

01:24:16
Speaker 17: In the winter, all right, And Georgia, I don't disagree with any of that. And I've actually never in my fucking life slipped a pair of They've never touched my feet in any way, shape or form, however, never, never. During the pandemic, I have opened my heart and my feet to slides, to athletic slides. So I feel like I can't judge people who like crocs. However, I will never fucking wear them. You'll never see me in a goddamn pair of crocs.

01:24:48
Speaker 3: Okay, so you're kind of saying gift simply because.

01:24:53
Speaker 17: Who am I to judge?

01:24:55
Speaker 3: Right, Well, let's just put it out there. The game is tied up. I know, and I'll tell you exactly why. This is a one pair of Crocs household and my boyfriend Jim owns it, probably size twelve or thirteen pair of Crocs wow, which I will occasionally, well daily put on to you know, tool around in the yard to go get the mail. This kind of thing, which almost every single day, leads to an argument of just let me buy you a pair of Crocs, And it makes absolutely no sense. There's never a time when we both need to be wearing crocs. Why can't I just wear his crocs? If there's ever a time when we're both wearing crocs, something's gone wrong.

01:25:44
Speaker 17: Yeah, don't open the door. I will say this when I agree to that. Okay, these slides are comfortable now Vince has like buys me a new pair every two months, So.

01:25:54
Speaker 3: Don't open the door to I refuse. Yeah, I'm never going. I don't need a pair of Crocs that actually fits me. I can kind of just totter around. It's tottering a word. Do you totter in a crock?

01:26:05
Speaker 2: Yes? I think so.

01:26:07
Speaker 3: I think it's perfectly fair for me to wear these things. And so they're absolutely a curse for me and therefore for everyone.

01:26:19
Speaker 5: Also, how sweay or your feet when you get.

01:26:21
Speaker 3: Back for the mailbox are damp? It's dusty, that's almost an immediate it's because it's kind of that warm rubber that your skin doesn't quite know what to.

01:26:33
Speaker 1: Do with it.

01:26:34
Speaker 17: Yes, it's not made for human skin.

01:26:36
Speaker 3: Unnatural, it's what the it's what they.

01:26:38
Speaker 5: Make subway sandwich bread out.

01:26:40
Speaker 4: Of, as well and meat.

01:26:41
Speaker 5: And that's how you can tell. It shouldn't be on your feet.

01:26:46
Speaker 3: No one should have a foot long on their feet. Okay, Well it's tied up. This is very exciting, I mean, this final one. I mean, let's just be honest. Neither of you is going away with Old Star. Both lost one round. But we'll see what happens with this next thing. Gift or a curse asteroids gift gift? Okay?

01:27:13
Speaker 17: And why wow, space man, it's fucking vast and crazy and it moves around even if it's made up. And this is a simulation at least they made whoever made the simulation made it pretty and wondrous, you know what I'm saying?

01:27:33
Speaker 3: Right, interesting defense, And now, Karen.

01:27:38
Speaker 23: I based my answer first on the eighties video game Asteroids, which was a visual feast.

01:27:45
Speaker 5: Remember the lines, so many lines.

01:27:49
Speaker 23: But it also is this thing where, yes, space is this kind of mysterious black cloak that surrounds our world.

01:27:58
Speaker 5: But then there is like this kind of.

01:28:01
Speaker 23: Like the universe's villain, where at any point, if a big enough one comes by, we're done for. So it keeps us very present, and I think the threat maybe keeps a lot of us in our gratitude attitude.

01:28:16
Speaker 5: But also it's.

01:28:17
Speaker 23: The kind of thing where it's like, this won't go on forever, because you know, now these days, they're constantly going, oh did you hear the new asteroid that's coming by.

01:28:25
Speaker 5: They're always swinging by.

01:28:27
Speaker 23: So I think it really keeps us humble, and it keeps us, you know, everything right sized, and I really appreciate that. I think only asteroids have the power to do something that big.

01:28:38
Speaker 4: Wouldn't be the worst way to go.

01:28:40
Speaker 17: I will say that every time they're like it's coming, I'm like, all right, yeah s wrap it up.

01:28:46
Speaker 3: Okay, you've both mounted interesting defenses. And before we get into this, before I reveal the correct answer, I do want to give a shout out. As long as we're talking about eighties video games. I recently played one called Streaker at an arcade. I played an old game which is essentially Pac Man. But you're a little naked man slowly moving around the screen. What so whoever created that video game? God bless, I had a wonderful time.

01:29:11
Speaker 5: Never heard of that.

01:29:12
Speaker 3: That's crazy, tiny naked man running around the screen trying to get away from the police. All that aside, we're talking about asteroids here. Sure you've both said gift. You both have one point. This could take you both to two points if you're correct. Unfortunately you're both wrong. Asteroids are twist, I mean a curse on so many levels. Asteroids are all talk and no action. We are constantly getting threatened about asteroids smashing in the Earth. When's it going to happen. I don't think it's ever gonna happen, because the.

01:29:54
Speaker 17: Universe doesn't exist. That's fucking making. My point is, don't tease me, Okay, don't tease me with this little threat, these narrow misses.

01:30:04
Speaker 3: Oh it might hit, Oh one killed all the dinosaurs. But what in the meantime, what's going on? Destroy humanity or get off the pot sort of situations what I said. Asteroids are Oh, I could go on. We don't need them and we would be better off without them.

01:30:25
Speaker 4: Destroy all asteroids.

01:30:27
Speaker 3: Destroy all asteroids. Don't even destroy I don't. We've put too much energy into thinking about them.

01:30:34
Speaker 5: They're just trying to get all the time.

01:30:38
Speaker 23: They're just a really dramatic friend from like a theater class.

01:30:41
Speaker 5: That's like, I'm really having.

01:30:42
Speaker 23: A terrible weekend, and it's just like, yeah, I don't care anymore.

01:30:46
Speaker 9: I can't.

01:30:46
Speaker 3: I can't do it this time.

01:30:47
Speaker 17: You keep threatening your weekend. Your weekend's ruined, but I'm just done all.

01:30:56
Speaker 3: Talk real will they won't they.

01:30:59
Speaker 13: You too?

01:31:00
Speaker 3: I'm frankly embarrassed for both of you. It's the holidays and you both got one out of three odd shut off. I'm so bad with the grade grading system. It's been too long since I've gotten a grade. But I'm pretty sure are thirty three percent in f.

01:31:16
Speaker 17: I think I'm ashamed of myself.

01:31:18
Speaker 23: Yeah, I feel I feel dirty. Now I'm hoping for that asteroid. Now I'm begging for that asteroid.

01:31:24
Speaker 17: Karen, we deserve to only wear crocs for the rest of our life. Sweaty feet, sweaty gross from here on crystal pins and.

01:31:33
Speaker 3: Them, oh all of humanity and crocs just looking to the skies for destruction.

01:31:41
Speaker 23: And then shoving Andy's mints down their throats as it just going and it for me.

01:31:46
Speaker 3: Please mint dribbling down. Oh what a wonderful image for the holidays. Yeah, I think that's kind of what we want to think about while we're sitting around the fire, kind of resenting loved ones.

01:32:01
Speaker 5: Ford for absolutely or eating whatever's nearby.

01:32:07
Speaker 23: Yeah, whether it be an applet or a coutlet, just getting it done.

01:32:14
Speaker 3: And applets and what kroclets I was going to say, do you sound like competitors to crocs? That feels like an off brand croc? Yeap, get your applets on. We're going to garden.

01:32:29
Speaker 5: Who took my cutlets?

01:32:30
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's what they're called you too. Well, I'm I hate to send you off in such a horrible way. Twenty twenty two will be a better year for you, guys. We'll be back.

01:32:42
Speaker 17: I'm fucking I want to get my fucking I want to get my uh what's it called back, my reward, my.

01:32:48
Speaker 3: Trophy, your groove? Oh yeah, you want to get your groove back.

01:32:52
Speaker 17: If you want us, you'll have us.

01:32:54
Speaker 23: Yeah, give us another chance sometime down the line, because I think you know.

01:32:59
Speaker 3: I love a redempt story.

01:33:00
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's we deserve it.

01:33:02
Speaker 3: And I can offer you that in the future. But I mean, please train take the rest of the year off, Yes, and we'll return to the stadium at another point.

01:33:14
Speaker 2: Okay, it sounds great.

01:33:16
Speaker 5: We deserve this.

01:33:17
Speaker 3: Good.

01:33:18
Speaker 17: Happy holidays, Holidays, arger, happy holidays.

01:33:29
Speaker 3: Oh that's the last game we'll be playing on this episode of the show. I hope you've had a good time. I hope it's been a thrill ride. I hope it's been a soothing time. I hope it's done whatever you needed it to do. While maybe you're you know, sitting in the Best Buy parking lot just dreading going back to your family. I don't know. This is the end of the podcast, which we frequent and they you know, run into at the end of the show, and this is kind of it for the year. So I'm gonna send you off with a I'm gonna cast a little spell on you that you know, in twenty twenty two you have a you know, just a banner year, and that everything goes perfectly, that nothing bad happens. We'll move through it together we'll fall deeper and deeper in love with each other, and you know, continue our path towards who knows what. I'm going to let you go. I love you, Happy holidays, Bye bye, I said, No Gifts is an exactly right production. It's produced and engineered by our dear friend Anna Lise Nelson, and the theme song is by miracle worker Amy Mann. You must follow the show on Instagra Graham at I said, No Gifts, That's where you're going to see pictures of all these wonderful gifts I'm getting. You have to see the gifts. Listen and subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher or wherever you found me. And why not leave a review while you're there. It's really the least you could do, considering everything I do for you. And if you're interested in advertising on the show, go to mideral dot com slash ads.

01:35:29
Speaker 1: And I invited you hear Funna Man myself perfectly clear. When you're a guest to me, you gotta come to me empty, And I said, no, guests, your presences presents enough and I'm already too much stuff, So how do you dare to survey me?

01:36:01
Speaker 13: Then with the ung