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Speaker 1: My wife and I took a DNA test. We were adopted,

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Speaker 1: and I don't know what to do after seeing these results.

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Speaker 2: Wait, are they like related?

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Speaker 1: I mean there's you know, I mean lots of possibilities

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Speaker 1: could happen. Step bro, I mean with real step there's

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Speaker 1: only one way to find out, Sam.

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Speaker 2: Oh God, I don't know if I want to find out.

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Speaker 2: I don't know if I want to be saddled with

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Speaker 2: that kind of knowledge.

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Speaker 1: Well buck up, cowboy, because this saddle is strapped into

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Speaker 1: those hot, sweet thighs and we're writing the story. Oh

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Speaker 1: God to the sunset.

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Speaker 2: All right, let's do it. I guess.

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Speaker 1: I decided to get tested to see if I could

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Speaker 1: donate my kidney to my wife of six years. Wow.

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Speaker 2: That what a nice guy like, just off the bat.

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Speaker 2: Good kidneys away, salute.

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Speaker 1: My wife got sick just after our son was born

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Speaker 1: and now is in need of a kidney transplant. We

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Speaker 1: checked with their relatives and none were a match or

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Speaker 1: a viable donor. Last week I got tested. I knew

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Speaker 1: it would be a long shot, so I decided to

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Speaker 1: get tested to see if I could donate. I got

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Speaker 1: a call the other day saying that I was a match.

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Speaker 1: But then the doctor said something about wanting to do

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Speaker 1: additional testing due to some information from the h l

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Speaker 1: A tissue test results. I didn't think much of it,

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Speaker 1: and I agree, Oh god, dude, I hate the now.

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Speaker 1: Why not like this? Still? Test it? Take it. It's

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Speaker 1: a big.

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Speaker 2: Okay, okay, okay, I mean, I mean we should all

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Speaker 2: let's create our own like curse words.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, we have nut juice.

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Speaker 2: What should we say in seid of flirt flag flourg

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Speaker 2: flurg flirt flirg flirg.

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Speaker 1: I like that. That could be our merch line flirt

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Speaker 1: flirt fl word. Guys, check it out. But then the

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Speaker 1: results came back and I was shocked and confused. He

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Speaker 1: explained that because of how DNA information has passed down

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Speaker 1: through generations, apparent to a child could have at least

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Speaker 1: a fifty percent match, siblings could have a zero to

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Speaker 1: one hundred percent match, and it was rare to have

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Speaker 1: a high match as a husband and wife. So I

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Speaker 1: asked him the natural question, what did he mean by that?

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Speaker 2: Huh, fir, this is so bad. I this man's world

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Speaker 2: is about to get rough.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. He then said everything is fine and I don't

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Speaker 1: need to worry oh, my god, just kidding to me.

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Speaker 1: He then said that my wife and I have a

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Speaker 1: abnormally high match percentage.

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Speaker 2: What does that mean? What does that mean?

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Speaker 1: Long story short, we are related?

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Speaker 2: How related?

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Speaker 1: We're gonna find out kind of how related We're gonna

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Speaker 1: kind of find out.

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Speaker 2: Okay, okay, okay, No, I'm not kidding.

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Speaker 1: I was put up for adoption before I was born

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Speaker 1: and placed into a family that moved a cost country.

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Speaker 1: I knew I was adopted, but we didn't have any

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Speaker 1: information about my biological family. It was a closed option.

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Speaker 1: I met my wife by chance eight years ago. I

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Speaker 1: was on a trip from work and she was working

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Speaker 1: at the site that I went to. That's so crazy,

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Speaker 1: because like it would be one thing if they were

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Speaker 1: like in the same town, like if they went to whatever,

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Speaker 1: like the same like in the same city. But no,

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Speaker 1: he was literally out of town. Like that is the

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Speaker 1: odds are just so insane. My god. We worked together

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Speaker 1: for a week. We exchanged numbers to keep in touch,

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Speaker 1: and I was sent back about three more times that year,

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Speaker 1: and each time we became closer and closer. It's almost

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Speaker 1: like we're family.

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Speaker 2: We just like all of the same things.

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Speaker 1: So weird. We look the same. We have so much

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Speaker 1: in common. Our hair colors the same, our eye colors

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Speaker 1: the same, our face looks, the same, blood types the

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Speaker 1: same blood types, the same, our genetics of the same. Wow,

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Speaker 1: you know we have we have so much in common. Crazy,

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Speaker 1: why don't we get married?

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Speaker 2: Let's do it, let's not maybe, dude, I feel like

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Speaker 2: before every marriage there should be a blood test.

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Speaker 1: Baby's DNA test, and the marriage is blood tell everyone

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Speaker 1: can agree on blood test for the marriage.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's actually, marry your cousin.

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Speaker 1: That's an easy one. I was given the opportunity to

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Speaker 1: be transferred out there in a new higher paying position

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Speaker 1: in a different partners as hers, and the rest is history.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna pause just real quick, Like, I want to

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Speaker 1: know how you guys are.

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Speaker 2: How are you guys feeling?

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Speaker 1: How I'm doing? How are you doing over there? Guys,

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Speaker 1: we're checking it on you.

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Speaker 2: I hate these stories. I have a pit in my stomach. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: you know, it's just the idea of like realizing that

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Speaker 2: the person you love more than anything else in this world,

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Speaker 2: that you're related to them, dude, is freaking terrifying. I

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Speaker 2: just because we've did a story like this where they

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Speaker 2: realized they were brother and sister. Yeah, because they were

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Speaker 2: both adopted. And then they're they're like, do we tell

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Speaker 2: anyone what you're doing? One person's realize they did twenty

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Speaker 2: three meters and me they realized they were brother, and says,

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Speaker 2: do I tell my partner?

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Speaker 1: It's like one of the craziest things ever. Do you

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Speaker 1: both of them know about these results? I think so,

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Speaker 1: but I'm not one hundred percent sure. I don't know

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Speaker 1: what to do moving forward, but I know it might

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Speaker 1: be wrong. But she is my wife and the mother

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Speaker 1: of our kids. This post is probably going to be removed,

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Speaker 1: but this is all true.

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Speaker 2: How related are they?

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Speaker 1: There? There's more, Okay, there's more.

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Speaker 2: Edit.

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Speaker 1: All of my family is from my adopted parents. My

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Speaker 1: parents adopted me two minutes after I was born. Locked

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Speaker 1: down over there, Yeah, get it. Their name is on

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Speaker 1: my birth certificate and they have not told me anything

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Speaker 1: about my bio parents and don't have any info. Her

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Speaker 1: family is not a match as stated above. Most of

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Speaker 1: her family has low match potential or can't donate their

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Speaker 1: kidneys due to other medical reasons. And on to the

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Speaker 1: big update.

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Speaker 2: Please tell us how related they are? That's the information.

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Speaker 2: The information I want to know. Yes, I do have

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Speaker 2: bad grammar and spelling. Yes, I'm stressing and freaked out.

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Speaker 2: Yes I can play the banjo. No, there was no

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Speaker 2: genetic test when we got married. Our state dropped that

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Speaker 2: in the nineteen nineties. And know my wife has never

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Speaker 2: been stuck in the dryer, but she once got stuck

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Speaker 2: under the bed.

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Speaker 1: Step bro, step bro.

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Speaker 2: It's crazy that all the step brother stepsister stuff is

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Speaker 2: always in getting stuck in the washing machine.

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Speaker 1: Why are we doing so much laundry?

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Speaker 2: And why am I getting erection every time I do

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Speaker 2: my laundry?

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Speaker 1: Now, goag. We just look at a washing machine, We're like, oh,

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Speaker 1: oh god, the wash cycle? What that cycle?

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Speaker 3: Though?

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Speaker 2: Fin cycle?

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Speaker 1: Dry? But why am getting hot and heavy? Oh dear.

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Speaker 1: The reason I didn't go into too much detail is

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Speaker 1: I didn't want to be recognized. Well, being on the

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Speaker 1: front page of Reddit did not help with that. I

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Speaker 1: appreciated all of your comments and feedback. Yeah, I just

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Speaker 1: want to know how related they are.

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Speaker 2: I know the third cousins, second cousins, I know first cousins, siblings.

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Speaker 1: I was freaking out after I got the news and

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Speaker 1: had to get outside advice when the doctor said that

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Speaker 1: the percentage was abnormally high, and that we might be related.

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Speaker 1: I kind of zoned out and started to piece things

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Speaker 1: together in my mind. My parents live a thousand miles away.

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Speaker 1: They met my in laws a few times, once at

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Speaker 1: my wedding and when both of my children were born.

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Speaker 1: My children are fine. My daughter's incredibly smart for her age,

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Speaker 1: and my son is a handful but he's healthy. But

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Speaker 1: he only has one hand. That hand is full of

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Speaker 1: I got three hands. Nipple.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: The way my adoption worked was when my bio mom

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Speaker 1: gave birth to me, I was checked out and put

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Speaker 1: in a different room. From what my parents explained they

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Speaker 1: were in that room waiting. They never met my biological

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Speaker 1: mother in person, and my biological mom only had a

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Speaker 1: profile to just pick them out as candidates. I called

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Speaker 1: my parents and told them that I needed to know

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Speaker 1: everything they knew about my biological mom. They told me

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Speaker 1: they didn't know much, that she was single, had me

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Speaker 1: at sixteen, and the father was not in the picture. Also,

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Speaker 1: I was born in a hospital only one hour away

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Speaker 1: from my wife. Growing up, I didn't want to find

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Speaker 1: out about my bioparents. To me, my parents were always

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Speaker 1: my parents. I knew I was adopted, and it was

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Speaker 1: a close adoption. I figured it didn't matter long term.

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Speaker 1: I am not going to do an additional at home

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Speaker 1: DNA test through any of the traditional testing sites due

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Speaker 1: to personal reasons like the possibility of the family finding out.

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Speaker 2: Oh right, because it goes into their database.

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Speaker 1: Yes, yes, right, I forgot about that. Some doctors suggested

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Speaker 1: some other additional tests, and they said I should take

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Speaker 1: the nineteen hundred plus cm match. And now now we're

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Speaker 1: finally here, we're gonna know, We're going to know how

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Speaker 1: related they are. This test basically confirms that at least

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Speaker 1: one of my biological parents is also one of first

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Speaker 1: at least one, it confirms one. It confirms one, So

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Speaker 1: they are half siblings. They are half siblings.

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Speaker 2: I guess that's better than flirging your full sibling.

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Speaker 1: Okay, So also it can also mean first cousins or

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Speaker 1: aunt uncle. So basically, like, I guess the three options

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Speaker 1: of their match time are half siblings, cousins, or aunt uncle.

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Speaker 1: Not great options, you know, not the options you want.

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Speaker 2: No, No, I wouldn't want to play a little roulette

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Speaker 2: where it's like, well those are my options.

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Speaker 1: No, I want to spend that wheel that doesn't sound

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Speaker 1: like a fun game to me. When my kids were born,

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Speaker 1: my parents brought photos of me home as a baby

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Speaker 1: and commented that I and my son looked a lot

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Speaker 1: like my wife's dad. Dang, that's s yikes. My son

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Speaker 1: was easily explainable, but all three of us looking alike

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Speaker 1: is a different story. I'm not going to bring this

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Speaker 1: up ever. I might look at my father in law differently,

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Speaker 1: but nothing will hopefully change. I hope none of the

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Speaker 1: family goes on writa and connects the dots. I am

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Speaker 1: donating a kidney to my wife. We have started the

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Speaker 1: full process. It takes time and preparation, and I plan

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Speaker 1: on talking to my wife after the surgery and after recovery.

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Speaker 1: Oh so wife doesn't know. I guess she doesn't.

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Speaker 2: Wow, Bro, I want to know before you finish it? Yeah, yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 2: would you tell your wife in this scenario, telling her

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Speaker 2: after the surgery to worry about like what? My answer

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Speaker 2: is not really, it's not really time sensitive.

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Speaker 1: So I mean it's not necessarily there's no like event necessarily.

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Speaker 1: Well I thought originally I thought, like the kidney think

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Speaker 1: it was an issue, But now I guess with the

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Speaker 1: additional testing, it's not, but like, well, I mean, what

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Speaker 1: would you do, Like, would you, like, would you tell

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Speaker 1: her sooner?

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Speaker 2: I'm wondering if I would even want to know if

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Speaker 2: like I didn't know, Like, would I even want to know?

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Speaker 2: Would I be mad at if I found out later?

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Speaker 2: Would I be mad at my partner for not telling me?

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Speaker 1: That? I think is a very good question to ask.

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Speaker 2: I don't know if I would be.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's so tough, dude. I don't think.

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Speaker 2: I don't think I would want to know so like,

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Speaker 2: because I don't think I would want to know. I

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Speaker 2: don't know if I would tell my partner, but I

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Speaker 2: think I would have to. I think, like the best

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Speaker 2: thing to do would be to not tell my partner.

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Speaker 2: But I don't think I could keep it secret.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, that's it. Yeah, I don't know if I could. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I think that's the thing. Is, like, I don't know.

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Speaker 2: Maybe is the best thing is to tell your partner? Yeah,

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Speaker 2: the best thing would be to tell your partner.

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Speaker 1: It's like it's but yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 2: It would suck.

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Speaker 3: What do you do?

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Speaker 2: Guys?

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Speaker 1: Please tell us? My god, like, what could you possibly

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Speaker 1: do in this type of scenario? We will decide what

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Speaker 1: to do with our kids if we are going to

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Speaker 1: get them tested or ever tell them. I will not

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Speaker 1: be leaving my wife. I love and will always be

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Speaker 1: there for her. I made vows and I will keep them.

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Speaker 1: I love her more than I would a half sister.

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Speaker 1: That's hilarious.

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Speaker 2: Well, I don't think you should tell the kids. What

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Speaker 2: do you say, like, hey, you're an incest baby.

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Speaker 1: Maybe I don't know.

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Speaker 2: I would never tell my kids they were incest babies.

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Speaker 1: I mean I don't know. I don't I would. I

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Speaker 1: wouldn't be mad at him for for for doing it.

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Speaker 2: But I want to know if you were an incest baby.

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Speaker 1: I mean I wouldn't want to. I don't think you

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Speaker 1: want to know. Maybe, but it's but it's yeah, but

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Speaker 1: it's like it's the problem is it's hard to know,

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Speaker 1: like without telling them, you know, like without telling them,

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Speaker 1: they're like, okay, I don't know if they would or

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Speaker 1: would not want to know. You know, I don't know.

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Speaker 2: John, All right, you're said, tell me right now? Would

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Speaker 2: you or would you not want to know if you

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Speaker 2: were an incest baby.

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Speaker 1: I wouldn't. I wouldn't want to know. I wouldn't want

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Speaker 1: to know.

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Speaker 2: It's a box and it's like all right, chance Schrodinger's

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Speaker 2: incest baby, chance being an incest baby.

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Speaker 1: If you opened the box, not Schroedergger, don't bing him

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Speaker 1: into this. I would leave it. I would leave it.

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Speaker 2: Bro I'm leaving that.

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Speaker 1: I would leave it.

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Speaker 2: I'm not looking if I want to know if I'm

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Speaker 2: if I'm an incest baby, I don't want to know.

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Speaker 1: I just don't know if what, Like do you tell them?

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Speaker 1: You know, that's no, you.

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Speaker 2: Don't tell your kids. Maybe tell your wife. Yeah, you

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Speaker 2: tell your kids, man, you don't tell your kids. That's like,

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Speaker 2: do you tell your kids that you're like, they're an accident?

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Speaker 1: Okay, all right, that's a good that's a very good. Uh,

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Speaker 1: that's a very good analogy accident. This is a mega

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Speaker 1: accident over here up on aisle.

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Speaker 2: Your your kouchie, your your mama, my sister. Yeah, I

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Speaker 2: would uh yeah, that will tell us what you would do.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, I don't think I would tell the kids.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Life. So all in all, I do plan on

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Speaker 1: telling her after the surgery. She's not doing well and

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Speaker 1: I think this will be even harder for her. So

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Speaker 1: I guess she's going through with the surgery right now.

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Speaker 1: I would rather her note that I love her as

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Speaker 1: a husband rather than flip her world upside down right

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Speaker 1: before a life changing in dangerous surgery. Telling our kids

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Speaker 1: is not a decision I'm going to make on my own.

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Speaker 1: It will be a joint thing after my wife knows.

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Speaker 1: My God, guys, my goodness.

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Speaker 2: I say, don't don't tell them.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I think he made a good point, like do

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Speaker 1: you tell your kids like it's the truth that they

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Speaker 1: were an accident? But it doesn't It doesn't matter really

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Speaker 1: at the end of the day. It's a little bit different.

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Speaker 1: But I think I think that is honestly a good

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Speaker 1: way to think about it. I guess not. Yeah, it's

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Speaker 1: just it's just so such as a wild thing to

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Speaker 1: have to keep from from.

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Speaker 2: Your is a wild scenario that you that for wild

303
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Speaker 2: decision you have to make. But let us know what

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Speaker 2: you would do in the comments below, please, and we'll

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Speaker 2: see you the next episode.

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Speaker 1: Am I the a hole for refusing to join the

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Speaker 1: military and ending my family's legacy?

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Speaker 2: I don't know, Nick, Is that is that a thing

309
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Speaker 2: in the military, ending someone's legacy?

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Speaker 3: I mean ending the legacy of never joining, or that

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Speaker 3: everyone before you had joined, And you're the asshole? He didn't.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, the asshole didn't.

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Speaker 3: Right, right. I mean there's a little bit of social pressure,

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Speaker 3: I guess, but I think it's like more, it's less

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Speaker 3: of the social pressure of like, oh, well, so and

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Speaker 3: so didn't have kids, or so and so never got married,

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Speaker 3: like maybe twenty thirty years ago, like that was a thing,

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Speaker 3: But now I think it's like I don't know, joining

319
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Speaker 3: the military is a lot different now than it was

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Speaker 3: when I, you know, back in two thousand and seven

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Speaker 3: when I joined, back in the good old days, back days, Man,

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Speaker 3: my space, baby, let's go Tom.

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Speaker 1: You know if he was right there with us.

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Speaker 3: He did it right. He did it right. Fucked he

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Speaker 3: had to like go and ask everyone to be friends. Tom,

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Speaker 3: like made it to where you were a friend when

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Speaker 3: you signed.

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Speaker 1: Up, exactly, bake it in, baby.

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Speaker 3: I mean he knew sliding into d MS back then

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Speaker 3: was important. He's like, I'm just going to be everyone.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, he really, he really started it all. He

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Speaker 1: started it all where is now probably on an island

333
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Speaker 1: with with all of the girls. He slipped.

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Speaker 2: He's got his horror of MySpace ladies.

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Speaker 3: I did it right, man, you could like put like

336
00:15:21,920 --> 00:15:24,160
Speaker 3: a I was like into like death metal back then,

337
00:15:24,320 --> 00:15:26,920
Speaker 3: like tray you and ship. You could like have a

338
00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:30,640
Speaker 3: song on like your main page, right and you could

339
00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:34,120
Speaker 3: like it was wild, dude, keep watching this ship. Don't

340
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Speaker 3: even know what we're talking about. Man.

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Speaker 2: So no, no, no, no, no, our audience does not

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Speaker 2: know MySpace at all. No no, primarily no.

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Speaker 3: No.

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Speaker 2: I didn't have a MySpace even Space, but I also

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Speaker 2: missed it.

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Speaker 3: I'm thirty three, y'all were like seven when I was

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Speaker 3: my Space.

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Speaker 2: My Space was still kicking though, in like two thousand

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Speaker 2: and nine.

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Speaker 1: And nine that's when I joined Facebook.

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Speaker 2: So yeah, nine, Space was like still the cup. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: but we joined the cooler version of my Space, Facebook,

353
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Speaker 2: which is ancient.

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00:16:01,720 --> 00:16:01,960
Speaker 1: Now.

355
00:16:03,200 --> 00:16:05,480
Speaker 3: Didn't you guys have to have like a college email

356
00:16:05,520 --> 00:16:08,520
Speaker 3: address at first to join Facebook? That was the thing I.

357
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Speaker 2: Was in middle school, miss, Yeah, I were that early

358
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Speaker 2: to face. That was like two thousand and six Facebook.

359
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Speaker 3: All right, all right, I'm dating myself, man, I'm fined.

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Speaker 1: All right, let's sign into the story. So, my eighteen

361
00:16:21,600 --> 00:16:26,840
Speaker 1: female family has a tradition that goes back five generations,

362
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Speaker 1: and that is the oldest of my family joins the military.

363
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Speaker 1: Only the four main branches. My mom was in the

364
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Speaker 1: Army and retired as a major. My grandpa was in

365
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Speaker 1: the Air Force and retired as a colonel. I believe

366
00:16:39,040 --> 00:16:42,800
Speaker 1: my great grandpa was in the Navy. My great grandfather

367
00:16:42,960 --> 00:16:46,359
Speaker 1: was in a marine, and my great great great grandfather

368
00:16:46,560 --> 00:16:47,360
Speaker 1: was also marine.

369
00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:50,040
Speaker 2: Dude, he comes back three generations of greats.

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00:16:50,400 --> 00:16:50,960
Speaker 1: That's a lot.

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00:16:51,040 --> 00:16:53,680
Speaker 3: I didn't think you can find that on ancestry dot com.

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00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:57,400
Speaker 1: Man, Like, was the military even invented?

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00:16:57,600 --> 00:16:58,520
Speaker 2: Yeah?

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00:16:58,800 --> 00:17:00,440
Speaker 1: More of eighteen twelve over here.

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Speaker 2: I also like wonder which side are we on? Like

376
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Speaker 2: if we're going back to Civil War era?

377
00:17:07,440 --> 00:17:07,720
Speaker 3: Great?

378
00:17:08,480 --> 00:17:12,480
Speaker 1: Like, yeah, what lines are we on?

379
00:17:12,600 --> 00:17:13,800
Speaker 2: What lines are we on?

380
00:17:14,160 --> 00:17:14,320
Speaker 1: You know?

381
00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:16,840
Speaker 2: And also like if he doesn't join, like when when

382
00:17:16,880 --> 00:17:18,600
Speaker 2: they look back, is are they just going to say,

383
00:17:18,600 --> 00:17:21,040
Speaker 2: like we are a great great and then not great

384
00:17:21,080 --> 00:17:23,240
Speaker 2: grandfather and then great great, Like are they going to

385
00:17:23,240 --> 00:17:25,800
Speaker 2: strip him to the title of great because he didn't

386
00:17:25,840 --> 00:17:28,680
Speaker 2: join thet anymore. It wasn't great anymore. You only do

387
00:17:28,880 --> 00:17:31,360
Speaker 2: you only get the title of great if you join

388
00:17:31,400 --> 00:17:31,880
Speaker 2: the military.

389
00:17:31,920 --> 00:17:34,160
Speaker 3: It's like it's like in baseball, right, like if you

390
00:17:34,240 --> 00:17:36,760
Speaker 3: if you're got mess up, you get an asterisk that's

391
00:17:36,760 --> 00:17:39,960
Speaker 3: your name, right, so that person forever asteris.

392
00:17:40,920 --> 00:17:43,600
Speaker 1: The fine print not great joined the military.

393
00:17:43,760 --> 00:17:46,640
Speaker 3: No where it says like suffix like junior or like

394
00:17:46,760 --> 00:17:49,160
Speaker 3: the third, it's just asterisk.

395
00:17:50,359 --> 00:17:51,120
Speaker 1: Didn't make the cut.

396
00:17:51,240 --> 00:17:52,840
Speaker 3: Yeah. No, I don't know if it's a real thing,

397
00:17:52,920 --> 00:17:56,480
Speaker 3: but that it should be. I'm pro shaming for something

398
00:17:56,480 --> 00:18:01,120
Speaker 3: like that, right, like, let's go to my space, let's

399
00:18:01,119 --> 00:18:03,560
Speaker 3: go back to shaming's.

400
00:18:03,680 --> 00:18:08,520
Speaker 1: Let's throw all of it back. So my family is

401
00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:11,360
Speaker 1: very proud of this fact and has been throwing this

402
00:18:11,640 --> 00:18:14,760
Speaker 1: in my face since I was fresh out the cooiter.

403
00:18:15,160 --> 00:18:19,479
Speaker 1: That is a direct quote. Interesting with the school year

404
00:18:19,560 --> 00:18:22,840
Speaker 1: coming to an end. I turned eighteen last month, the

405
00:18:23,080 --> 00:18:26,080
Speaker 1: like sign up, where's the paper is? What's the thing?

406
00:18:26,119 --> 00:18:29,359
Speaker 1: Is that conscribing conscription? What's what's the thing called? You

407
00:18:29,480 --> 00:18:32,399
Speaker 1: like sign up for the military before? But a thing

408
00:18:32,400 --> 00:18:35,000
Speaker 1: where it's like you sign up before you have to.

409
00:18:35,480 --> 00:18:38,760
Speaker 1: It's like you can like you can enlist, like that

410
00:18:38,920 --> 00:18:40,360
Speaker 1: pre enlisting, like you.

411
00:18:40,280 --> 00:18:42,600
Speaker 3: Could be like a half or something like that. It's

412
00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:45,040
Speaker 3: like before eighteen, right, you're like your parents can sign

413
00:18:45,160 --> 00:18:47,679
Speaker 3: and then like on your Yeah it's weird. I mean

414
00:18:47,720 --> 00:18:50,280
Speaker 3: they had it back like when I joined.

415
00:18:50,359 --> 00:18:52,920
Speaker 2: Like your parents can sign you off to the military.

416
00:18:53,040 --> 00:18:55,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like you know how you can like retract

417
00:18:55,080 --> 00:18:58,760
Speaker 3: from like having parents too. You can like like right, yeah,

418
00:18:59,040 --> 00:19:02,000
Speaker 3: a spate amani pace. Right, it's like very similar to.

419
00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:03,320
Speaker 2: Right shoes got.

420
00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:06,600
Speaker 3: I mean, it's it's different, dude. Like when I joined,

421
00:19:06,600 --> 00:19:09,159
Speaker 3: like it was in two thousand and seven, Iraq was

422
00:19:09,200 --> 00:19:13,760
Speaker 3: still nuts, Afghanistan was nuts. You like walked past the

423
00:19:13,840 --> 00:19:15,720
Speaker 3: recruiter's office and they just like brought you in and

424
00:19:15,720 --> 00:19:17,800
Speaker 3: made you sign a contract as fucked up?

425
00:19:18,160 --> 00:19:20,560
Speaker 2: Is that what happened to you or did you actually?

426
00:19:20,600 --> 00:19:22,840
Speaker 3: So buddy buddy of mine really wanted to be like

427
00:19:22,920 --> 00:19:25,680
Speaker 3: a badass Navy seal no ship. So he's like, Nick,

428
00:19:25,720 --> 00:19:29,000
Speaker 3: will you go with me? Because there's like rumors like

429
00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:30,680
Speaker 3: if you walked into any brands, because you know, they're

430
00:19:30,720 --> 00:19:33,879
Speaker 3: like door door door, it's like Air Force, Army, Marines, Navy,

431
00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:35,800
Speaker 3: like right next to each other in a shopping mall

432
00:19:35,920 --> 00:19:40,120
Speaker 3: across America, you would just you would go in and

433
00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:42,159
Speaker 3: you would get pressured to sign, right, because there was

434
00:19:42,200 --> 00:19:45,159
Speaker 3: like back then, it seemed like there were quotas to

435
00:19:45,160 --> 00:19:48,080
Speaker 3: get people to join every month, right, especially like during wartime.

436
00:19:48,640 --> 00:19:50,919
Speaker 3: But now it's like shit, I hear it's even hard

437
00:19:50,960 --> 00:19:53,639
Speaker 3: to join the military. So really, me, you know you

438
00:19:53,720 --> 00:19:54,400
Speaker 3: joined the military.

439
00:19:54,600 --> 00:19:57,480
Speaker 2: The old person that wants to to come up and

440
00:19:57,840 --> 00:20:00,199
Speaker 2: like I want to give my life to my country,

441
00:20:00,280 --> 00:20:01,040
Speaker 2: like nap, you.

442
00:20:03,320 --> 00:20:05,720
Speaker 3: Got a few asterisks under your belt. Now we can't.

443
00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:08,080
Speaker 1: It's all about today.

444
00:20:08,280 --> 00:20:10,159
Speaker 3: Yeah, absolutely, that's the theme of the.

445
00:20:10,200 --> 00:20:11,919
Speaker 1: Day, the day, baby.

446
00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:12,760
Speaker 3: But no, it's funny.

447
00:20:12,760 --> 00:20:13,960
Speaker 1: Actually the guy that I went with.

448
00:20:13,920 --> 00:20:15,439
Speaker 3: Because I was never going to join, he was just

449
00:20:15,480 --> 00:20:17,800
Speaker 3: like trusted me that I wouldn't let him like hanging right,

450
00:20:17,840 --> 00:20:20,400
Speaker 3: and then he ended up never joining and I ended

451
00:20:20,440 --> 00:20:22,919
Speaker 3: up joining. I joined the Air Force. It was different.

452
00:20:23,720 --> 00:20:27,639
Speaker 3: He like got in trouble and got pulled over one time.

453
00:20:27,920 --> 00:20:29,959
Speaker 3: I think he had a long night from before and

454
00:20:30,560 --> 00:20:33,080
Speaker 3: there's like something in his cup holder you shouldn't have had,

455
00:20:33,640 --> 00:20:35,560
Speaker 3: and the cops saw it, gave him like you know,

456
00:20:35,640 --> 00:20:40,119
Speaker 3: wrote him up for it, disqualified him indefinitely. Definitely, definitely.

457
00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:42,440
Speaker 3: There's certain things that you cannot have on your record.

458
00:20:42,480 --> 00:20:44,840
Speaker 3: You could have drank underage two or three times, you

459
00:20:44,880 --> 00:20:48,359
Speaker 3: could have smoked marijuana two or three times before without

460
00:20:48,400 --> 00:20:51,440
Speaker 3: getting permanently disqualified. But there's like a number of threshold

461
00:20:51,440 --> 00:20:54,800
Speaker 3: that if you go past completely disqualified him definitely.

462
00:20:55,760 --> 00:20:57,840
Speaker 1: So my man hit the high score, then.

463
00:20:59,600 --> 00:21:03,280
Speaker 3: Yoh, he won that game. Dude, he married with kids

464
00:21:03,320 --> 00:21:05,280
Speaker 3: and shure, you know, mans, he's doing good.

465
00:21:05,320 --> 00:21:05,960
Speaker 1: But there you go.

466
00:21:06,080 --> 00:21:07,240
Speaker 2: Oh, I'm glad he's a happy.

467
00:21:07,520 --> 00:21:08,160
Speaker 1: Shout out to him.

468
00:21:08,280 --> 00:21:09,000
Speaker 2: Shout out to him.

469
00:21:09,280 --> 00:21:12,840
Speaker 1: Back to the story, my mom was forcing me to

470
00:21:12,920 --> 00:21:16,560
Speaker 1: do fitness courses, buying me textbooks to help study for

471
00:21:16,640 --> 00:21:19,240
Speaker 1: the as vab as bab.

472
00:21:19,560 --> 00:21:23,119
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like your it's like your entrance exam. Gotcha,

473
00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:25,520
Speaker 3: it's like your SATs for the military. But it's like,

474
00:21:26,080 --> 00:21:27,760
Speaker 3: you know, what is this? And it's like a picture

475
00:21:27,760 --> 00:21:30,760
Speaker 3: of a wrench. It's like how do you un screen?

476
00:21:30,800 --> 00:21:33,960
Speaker 3: It's like very it's like weirdly technical, but like like

477
00:21:34,080 --> 00:21:37,879
Speaker 3: common sense technical, and it's like math and shit like that.

478
00:21:37,920 --> 00:21:41,080
Speaker 3: There's like I mean, I literally had taken like twelve, thirteen,

479
00:21:41,119 --> 00:21:43,399
Speaker 3: fourteen years ago, but I remember when I took it,

480
00:21:43,440 --> 00:21:46,040
Speaker 3: I was like, really, some.

481
00:21:46,080 --> 00:21:48,960
Speaker 1: Weird wrench is Yeah, it's like a picture.

482
00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:51,280
Speaker 3: Of this because like it's supposed to test you on

483
00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:54,800
Speaker 3: different skill sets that you either inherently have or have

484
00:21:54,880 --> 00:21:57,960
Speaker 3: grown to known, and so like, are you more on

485
00:21:58,000 --> 00:22:02,920
Speaker 3: the mechanical side, electrical side, natical side, english, whatever? Right?

486
00:22:03,000 --> 00:22:04,000
Speaker 3: So right?

487
00:22:04,359 --> 00:22:06,520
Speaker 2: And if you know what a wrench is, they immediately

488
00:22:06,560 --> 00:22:09,760
Speaker 2: put you on the mechanical side. He's got it.

489
00:22:12,880 --> 00:22:15,720
Speaker 3: Yeah, you like intentionally like get some shit wrong just

490
00:22:15,720 --> 00:22:17,480
Speaker 3: because you're like, I don't want to be a fucking electrician.

491
00:22:17,520 --> 00:22:18,320
Speaker 3: I don't want to come up.

492
00:22:18,840 --> 00:22:24,000
Speaker 1: Is this a wrench or a microwave? Yeah? Baby. Now

493
00:22:24,359 --> 00:22:28,040
Speaker 1: I have rebelled against this a while ago because sadly,

494
00:22:28,119 --> 00:22:30,480
Speaker 1: my brother passed away a few years ago, and this

495
00:22:30,640 --> 00:22:33,000
Speaker 1: is really hard on my parents. So I've kind of

496
00:22:33,040 --> 00:22:35,360
Speaker 1: just been going along with this whole pushing me into

497
00:22:35,400 --> 00:22:37,680
Speaker 1: the military until now.

498
00:22:37,880 --> 00:22:42,200
Speaker 2: Wait, they lost he lost his brother brother, and they're

499
00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:44,280
Speaker 2: going to be like, hey, we're going to risk losing

500
00:22:44,440 --> 00:22:44,960
Speaker 2: the other one.

501
00:22:45,560 --> 00:22:48,120
Speaker 3: I mean, you don't want to break tradition, man.

502
00:22:48,359 --> 00:22:53,920
Speaker 1: We don't want to break tradition. Sam, we're shaming today, putting.

503
00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:58,600
Speaker 2: Them I'm sorry, shaming you for not shaming. Yeah, okay,

504
00:22:58,720 --> 00:23:01,560
Speaker 2: you know, and actually shaming for not shaving is probably

505
00:23:01,600 --> 00:23:02,919
Speaker 2: the purest form of shaving.

506
00:23:03,040 --> 00:23:06,520
Speaker 3: Absolutely, that's the that's the purest form of shaming.

507
00:23:06,320 --> 00:23:08,680
Speaker 2: Right, that's a curist part. That's shame squared.

508
00:23:08,880 --> 00:23:09,400
Speaker 1: That's right.

509
00:23:09,480 --> 00:23:12,560
Speaker 2: That's actually odd the aspab but is it like is

510
00:23:12,560 --> 00:23:12,880
Speaker 2: it like.

511
00:23:12,880 --> 00:23:15,520
Speaker 3: Two negatives equally positive? So it's really not shaming.

512
00:23:15,840 --> 00:23:18,440
Speaker 1: Oh shit is double shaming encouraging.

513
00:23:18,119 --> 00:23:21,800
Speaker 3: That the question it was like, have like a shame

514
00:23:21,840 --> 00:23:25,600
Speaker 3: and another shame, And it was like yeah.

515
00:23:24,600 --> 00:23:26,920
Speaker 1: And if you can shame well enough, you become a general.

516
00:23:27,359 --> 00:23:29,560
Speaker 3: An officer of shaming.

517
00:23:29,359 --> 00:23:33,679
Speaker 1: Officer, shame officer. So fast forward to last week. I

518
00:23:33,720 --> 00:23:36,800
Speaker 1: overheard my mom talking on the phone to a recruiter

519
00:23:37,400 --> 00:23:41,640
Speaker 1: talking about my options for possibly becoming an officer. I mean,

520
00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:42,960
Speaker 1: what do we think about that?

521
00:23:43,040 --> 00:23:46,680
Speaker 3: I mean, helicopter parents are still a real thing, right, yeah,

522
00:23:46,760 --> 00:23:47,080
Speaker 3: like we.

523
00:23:47,119 --> 00:23:55,000
Speaker 2: Know this, yeah, but this is a Blackhawk helicopter parents.

524
00:23:52,760 --> 00:23:55,800
Speaker 3: And ship this one. This mom is on it. She's like,

525
00:23:55,840 --> 00:23:57,959
Speaker 3: I'm buying you books. I'm getting you into berries, Like

526
00:23:58,119 --> 00:23:59,720
Speaker 3: I'm gonna call I buy.

527
00:23:59,680 --> 00:24:02,640
Speaker 2: You that are fifteen you got the whole wholl nine

528
00:24:02,720 --> 00:24:05,840
Speaker 2: yards in a bullet, I mean hold nine millimeters?

529
00:24:06,000 --> 00:24:08,399
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I like that.

530
00:24:08,560 --> 00:24:10,520
Speaker 3: I mean, you know, I came from from like a

531
00:24:10,520 --> 00:24:12,960
Speaker 3: family that was like so hands off, like do whatever

532
00:24:13,000 --> 00:24:15,560
Speaker 3: you want. I was like, guys, you know, like tell

533
00:24:15,600 --> 00:24:17,240
Speaker 3: me like some cool shit I can do, like no,

534
00:24:17,680 --> 00:24:19,520
Speaker 3: figure it out, you know, so at least, like you know,

535
00:24:19,600 --> 00:24:22,119
Speaker 3: her mom's like helping her out right, Like, hey, I

536
00:24:22,160 --> 00:24:23,679
Speaker 3: know you don't know what the fuck you're doing, but like,

537
00:24:23,800 --> 00:24:25,240
Speaker 3: let me help you, help.

538
00:24:25,080 --> 00:24:27,800
Speaker 1: You Yeah, yeah, me shame you into the right the

539
00:24:27,880 --> 00:24:28,320
Speaker 1: right path.

540
00:24:28,640 --> 00:24:31,200
Speaker 3: I mean, there's some hardcore guilt going on there, man,

541
00:24:33,160 --> 00:24:34,320
Speaker 3: that's hardcore dude.

542
00:24:34,440 --> 00:24:37,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, mix of emotions for sure. It was at this

543
00:24:37,119 --> 00:24:41,119
Speaker 1: point that the realization finally hit me. I told my

544
00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:45,320
Speaker 1: mom I will not be joining a few days ago,

545
00:24:45,880 --> 00:24:49,080
Speaker 1: and a huge fight happened after that. It was a

546
00:24:49,119 --> 00:24:54,639
Speaker 1: war zone. Yeah, no, need to send you off. We're

547
00:24:54,680 --> 00:24:57,440
Speaker 1: at We're right here. Arguments with mom. It can get there.

548
00:24:57,520 --> 00:24:58,720
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yeah, mumba.

549
00:24:58,760 --> 00:25:04,040
Speaker 1: Fuck you up, dude, Yeah, knock you out. But I

550
00:25:04,160 --> 00:25:08,199
Speaker 1: basically wasted her time in quotes and she called me

551
00:25:08,359 --> 00:25:12,159
Speaker 1: a disappointment. But I think I have the right to

552
00:25:12,240 --> 00:25:16,240
Speaker 1: choose my destiny. So the question is, am I a hole?

553
00:25:16,359 --> 00:25:18,240
Speaker 2: I think you have the right to choose your own destiny?

554
00:25:18,440 --> 00:25:20,960
Speaker 2: Like I think so, yeah, you know, I also don't

555
00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:24,520
Speaker 2: know like that, like the family contact I feel like

556
00:25:25,400 --> 00:25:29,800
Speaker 2: is important, but I think not not to the point

557
00:25:29,840 --> 00:25:32,320
Speaker 2: of like not giving you agency over your life.

558
00:25:32,600 --> 00:25:33,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, what do you think, nick?

559
00:25:34,040 --> 00:25:36,720
Speaker 3: I mean, I've heard the story like a million times.

560
00:25:36,760 --> 00:25:38,880
Speaker 3: It's like parents are so pumped that like their their

561
00:25:38,920 --> 00:25:41,760
Speaker 3: son or something once like doing the military does all

562
00:25:41,800 --> 00:25:43,919
Speaker 3: this shit gets prepped up and like right before they're like,

563
00:25:44,119 --> 00:25:44,720
Speaker 3: I don't want to.

564
00:25:44,640 --> 00:25:45,240
Speaker 1: Go, dude.

565
00:25:45,280 --> 00:25:47,760
Speaker 3: It is gnarly signing on a contract for four years

566
00:25:47,760 --> 00:25:49,760
Speaker 3: that you can't get out of, knowing that you are

567
00:25:49,800 --> 00:25:53,639
Speaker 3: literally just military property and you get told what to do,

568
00:25:53,680 --> 00:25:56,560
Speaker 3: when to do it, how to do it. So yeah,

569
00:25:56,760 --> 00:25:58,280
Speaker 3: I mean I think a lot of people back out,

570
00:25:58,320 --> 00:26:01,080
Speaker 3: Like at the end, a ton of people do shit.

571
00:26:01,160 --> 00:26:03,400
Speaker 3: I had a ton of buddies like oh man would

572
00:26:03,440 --> 00:26:05,920
Speaker 3: love to join, Yeah, but you would have a right,

573
00:26:06,040 --> 00:26:07,600
Speaker 3: like you know.

574
00:26:08,600 --> 00:26:10,600
Speaker 1: It's like the military version of like oh man, I

575
00:26:10,600 --> 00:26:12,400
Speaker 1: thought of uber in like two thousand and two.

576
00:26:12,520 --> 00:26:17,200
Speaker 3: Oh Man, Like yo, dudes, like ant motherfucker. I just

577
00:26:17,200 --> 00:26:19,200
Speaker 3: had four years got out, So I s old buddies

578
00:26:19,200 --> 00:26:21,760
Speaker 3: that have been in like thirteen fourteen years.

579
00:26:22,240 --> 00:26:25,159
Speaker 2: So what's the difference in like mindset between someone who

580
00:26:25,240 --> 00:26:27,480
Speaker 2: does four years and gets out and like the people

581
00:26:27,520 --> 00:26:29,520
Speaker 2: that are like in it for like fourteen years.

582
00:26:29,720 --> 00:26:31,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's weird. Well, like the sales pitch is like

583
00:26:31,880 --> 00:26:34,560
Speaker 3: retire at thirty eight because if you join at eighteen,

584
00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:38,359
Speaker 3: you do twenty years. That's your like naxt term in

585
00:26:38,359 --> 00:26:41,760
Speaker 3: which you get full benefits for like life, right, So

586
00:26:41,880 --> 00:26:45,439
Speaker 3: that's the sales pitch is like join in retirement, but

587
00:26:45,480 --> 00:26:48,399
Speaker 3: like you would retire making like thirty five hundred a month,

588
00:26:49,320 --> 00:26:51,960
Speaker 3: she'd still need to get a job technically, especially when

589
00:26:51,960 --> 00:26:53,879
Speaker 3: that's probably like a third of your pay by the

590
00:26:53,880 --> 00:26:57,640
Speaker 3: time you hit twenty years. It's weird, dude. Yeah, it's

591
00:26:57,680 --> 00:26:59,320
Speaker 3: not real. I mean I got out right away because

592
00:26:59,320 --> 00:27:02,080
Speaker 3: I was like I joined for like a legitimate purpose,

593
00:27:02,480 --> 00:27:04,240
Speaker 3: like for a reason, and then got out for that

594
00:27:04,280 --> 00:27:06,760
Speaker 3: same reason. And then my boys who joined are just

595
00:27:06,800 --> 00:27:10,320
Speaker 3: like they go in for a four year, they re

596
00:27:10,520 --> 00:27:15,000
Speaker 3: enlist at that reenlistment at like eight years they're like, fuck,

597
00:27:15,000 --> 00:27:17,639
Speaker 3: I'm almost halfway there. And then you know, it's just

598
00:27:17,680 --> 00:27:19,800
Speaker 3: like all these things start start going and then you

599
00:27:20,040 --> 00:27:22,679
Speaker 3: forget like when you get out, like there's no assistance.

600
00:27:22,760 --> 00:27:26,200
Speaker 3: They really don't. When I was getting out, I didn't

601
00:27:26,200 --> 00:27:30,639
Speaker 3: do shit Like here's like a mock resume, here's like

602
00:27:31,080 --> 00:27:34,160
Speaker 3: a VA center for some medical shit if you need it,

603
00:27:34,400 --> 00:27:37,760
Speaker 3: Like nothing about school. So like, yeah, trans you're no

604
00:27:37,840 --> 00:27:43,480
Speaker 3: longer their their property, right so right, yeah, yeah, I

605
00:27:43,520 --> 00:27:45,679
Speaker 3: mean yeah, I work with a ton of veterans, so

606
00:27:46,359 --> 00:27:47,840
Speaker 3: you know, it's just the same story.

607
00:27:48,080 --> 00:27:52,639
Speaker 1: So overall, should you join the military, yes or no?

608
00:27:53,119 --> 00:27:55,160
Speaker 3: Dude, I have a nephew and niece. I would hands

609
00:27:55,160 --> 00:27:57,879
Speaker 3: down have them both go. I'd be like, go in,

610
00:27:58,040 --> 00:28:00,880
Speaker 3: do four years with the fuck out. You become an adult.

611
00:28:01,400 --> 00:28:03,720
Speaker 3: You learn discipline, you know hard work, you know how

612
00:28:03,720 --> 00:28:05,879
Speaker 3: to work in a team, you know how to work

613
00:28:06,280 --> 00:28:08,879
Speaker 3: leading a team. Like, there's all these skill sets that

614
00:28:08,960 --> 00:28:12,280
Speaker 3: you learn that I think after four years is really

615
00:28:12,359 --> 00:28:16,760
Speaker 3: like irrelevant, right, there's no more gaining after four years,

616
00:28:16,800 --> 00:28:19,960
Speaker 3: I feel, personally, But yeah, they do four Get the

617
00:28:19,960 --> 00:28:21,800
Speaker 3: fuck out. Use your jib. I mean they paid for

618
00:28:21,840 --> 00:28:25,520
Speaker 3: my law school, Like okay, so I have an undergrad

619
00:28:25,560 --> 00:28:27,119
Speaker 3: degree and a lot of degree all paid for to

620
00:28:27,160 --> 00:28:29,040
Speaker 3: the VA. Like okay.

621
00:28:29,359 --> 00:28:31,600
Speaker 2: This episode brought to you by the US Air Force.

622
00:28:32,320 --> 00:28:36,520
Speaker 1: Let's go to the skies, baby, guys, to the Moon

623
00:28:36,640 --> 00:28:37,240
Speaker 1: and back.

624
00:28:37,480 --> 00:28:39,600
Speaker 3: I think that I think the slogan is like blue

625
00:28:40,040 --> 00:28:42,440
Speaker 3: like like I don't like see blue out.

626
00:28:43,240 --> 00:28:44,640
Speaker 1: Wait did you fly the Air Force?

627
00:28:45,360 --> 00:28:48,040
Speaker 3: No? But like you go out and some girls, oh

628
00:28:48,040 --> 00:28:49,880
Speaker 3: what are you doing? Like the Air Force? Oh do

629
00:28:49,880 --> 00:28:53,160
Speaker 3: you fly? And you're like sure, Sure I was.

630
00:28:53,400 --> 00:28:55,360
Speaker 1: I was an MPs and Delta.

631
00:28:55,840 --> 00:28:57,240
Speaker 3: I was another American.

632
00:28:57,320 --> 00:29:00,800
Speaker 1: Let's go come on, okay, America second.

633
00:29:00,440 --> 00:29:05,200
Speaker 3: Brand American sponsored by no I was an MP and

634
00:29:05,200 --> 00:29:07,680
Speaker 3: then and then I did combat missions when I was

635
00:29:07,720 --> 00:29:11,040
Speaker 3: deployed with the Army Military Police.

636
00:29:11,240 --> 00:29:11,840
Speaker 2: What does that mean?

637
00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:14,880
Speaker 3: Pretend to military installation is like a little town. So

638
00:29:15,000 --> 00:29:16,720
Speaker 3: like if you drive around wherever you guys are from,

639
00:29:17,000 --> 00:29:18,800
Speaker 3: I live on Austin, So if I'm driving on the

640
00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:20,880
Speaker 3: street and I see a cop, like the only difference

641
00:29:20,880 --> 00:29:22,320
Speaker 3: between an MP and a cop is that the MP

642
00:29:22,440 --> 00:29:25,640
Speaker 3: is strictly on a military base, still placing the population,

643
00:29:25,840 --> 00:29:30,880
Speaker 3: still going to shopliftings and dvs and medical emergencies, same shiit,

644
00:29:31,080 --> 00:29:34,800
Speaker 3: same shit, just different like playground, different town.

645
00:29:35,040 --> 00:29:38,560
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, Wait, are the so like the soldiers are

646
00:29:38,600 --> 00:29:40,560
Speaker 2: still like shoplifting and stuff. Don't they have like everything

647
00:29:40,600 --> 00:29:40,960
Speaker 2: paid for it?

648
00:29:41,160 --> 00:29:44,000
Speaker 3: Well, you got to think too. You have like spouses

649
00:29:44,280 --> 00:29:47,600
Speaker 3: on base or non military, and then spouses in their

650
00:29:47,680 --> 00:29:50,640
Speaker 3: children on base who are non military, right, So you

651
00:29:50,720 --> 00:29:54,320
Speaker 3: have a big conglomerate of like non military people on

652
00:29:54,360 --> 00:29:57,160
Speaker 3: a military base, and then you have visitors who are

653
00:29:57,200 --> 00:30:00,120
Speaker 3: non military right Like yeah, and a lot of the

654
00:30:00,120 --> 00:30:02,000
Speaker 3: people who joined the military are not like the most

655
00:30:02,040 --> 00:30:06,200
Speaker 3: savvy or the most like you know, upstanding individually they

656
00:30:06,200 --> 00:30:09,440
Speaker 3: typically come, maybe not them, but they're friends too. Right,

657
00:30:10,120 --> 00:30:12,160
Speaker 3: Why do you join the military? Couldn't pay for school?

658
00:30:12,360 --> 00:30:13,960
Speaker 3: Grew up in a shitty part of this town. I

659
00:30:14,000 --> 00:30:17,880
Speaker 3: grew up in fucking where where else, like Nebraska? Right, Like,

660
00:30:18,200 --> 00:30:19,920
Speaker 3: so you join the military and you can't tell me

661
00:30:20,000 --> 00:30:22,040
Speaker 3: you don't have like some friends that come on base,

662
00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:25,880
Speaker 3: and those friends from like the you know, back where

663
00:30:25,880 --> 00:30:30,360
Speaker 3: you're from, do some ignorant stuff, you know, but you

664
00:30:30,360 --> 00:30:34,080
Speaker 3: would be surprised some military people have caught people's shoplifting.

665
00:30:34,360 --> 00:30:35,720
Speaker 3: You're like, what the fuck?

666
00:30:35,880 --> 00:30:37,080
Speaker 2: Due, what do you like?

667
00:30:37,280 --> 00:30:43,640
Speaker 1: Jerry? What are you doing? There's too much? All right?

668
00:30:43,680 --> 00:30:47,400
Speaker 2: I think that's uh. That's a wrap for this episode today.

669
00:30:47,720 --> 00:30:49,760
Speaker 1: Fed up by climaxing too hard?

670
00:30:50,000 --> 00:30:52,640
Speaker 2: That sounds like a good thing, man. Don't apologize for that.

671
00:30:52,800 --> 00:30:55,120
Speaker 1: You know, it's like you've reached the top of the mountain.

672
00:30:55,160 --> 00:30:55,320
Speaker 2: You know.

673
00:30:55,360 --> 00:30:56,520
Speaker 1: Sometimes injuries happen.

674
00:30:56,680 --> 00:30:59,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, if you met so hard you crap yourself. You're

675
00:30:59,320 --> 00:31:02,040
Speaker 2: winning w W.

676
00:31:02,560 --> 00:31:04,880
Speaker 1: So I am a thirty three female. For the past

677
00:31:04,880 --> 00:31:06,920
Speaker 1: six months, my siblings and I have been planning for

678
00:31:06,960 --> 00:31:09,680
Speaker 1: our parents forty years wedding anniversary.

679
00:31:09,840 --> 00:31:13,160
Speaker 2: Okay, nice, congrats to love for forty years.

680
00:31:13,360 --> 00:31:16,160
Speaker 1: Yes, my parents have had a rough time on and

681
00:31:16,200 --> 00:31:18,880
Speaker 1: off where they even broke up at times. Okay, maybe

682
00:31:18,920 --> 00:31:24,320
Speaker 1: not love, maybe maybe just rebuilding, rebuild, rebuilding. Yeah, yeah,

683
00:31:24,440 --> 00:31:27,200
Speaker 1: for various reasons. We don't really have any family pictures

684
00:31:27,200 --> 00:31:28,040
Speaker 1: together after.

685
00:31:27,920 --> 00:31:31,560
Speaker 2: Plannings because mom and dad are continuously being broken up

686
00:31:31,680 --> 00:31:34,200
Speaker 2: and put back together like humpty dumpty.

687
00:31:34,080 --> 00:31:36,400
Speaker 1: Don't know where where the other is going to be, or.

688
00:31:36,960 --> 00:31:39,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, you can't. You can't court a family photos if

689
00:31:39,640 --> 00:31:43,440
Speaker 2: dad there's no family to you know, freaking smash in

690
00:31:43,520 --> 00:31:44,200
Speaker 2: the secretary.

691
00:31:44,280 --> 00:31:47,720
Speaker 1: That's right. After planning back and forth, we decided we

692
00:31:47,760 --> 00:31:50,680
Speaker 1: will take real family pictures with the photographer as part

693
00:31:50,720 --> 00:31:53,080
Speaker 1: of the gift. After moving meetings and logistics and all

694
00:31:53,120 --> 00:31:57,920
Speaker 1: that jazz, May first was the date to do it.

695
00:31:58,640 --> 00:32:00,920
Speaker 1: April thirtieth. I decided to go out for a few drinks.

696
00:32:01,000 --> 00:32:04,000
Speaker 1: Now after I'm staining from sex and masturbation for almost

697
00:32:04,040 --> 00:32:04,800
Speaker 1: a year at this point.

698
00:32:04,960 --> 00:32:06,480
Speaker 2: Congrats, man, no fat.

699
00:32:06,360 --> 00:32:08,640
Speaker 1: Do your thing. After a couple of rounds, I ended

700
00:32:08,680 --> 00:32:13,280
Speaker 1: up going back to a guy's place. Uh oh, We

701
00:32:13,480 --> 00:32:16,600
Speaker 1: ended up doing the nasty and he was really considerate

702
00:32:16,640 --> 00:32:18,960
Speaker 1: to my needs. This guy is just making sure I'm

703
00:32:19,000 --> 00:32:21,640
Speaker 1: having a good time, which is great, This is good.

704
00:32:21,840 --> 00:32:24,120
Speaker 2: Guys. Just make sure your ladies are having a good time.

705
00:32:24,160 --> 00:32:26,960
Speaker 2: That's like, yeah, how you used to hear the bag

706
00:32:27,080 --> 00:32:30,160
Speaker 2: to cure the bag first before you shop for your

707
00:32:30,160 --> 00:32:30,560
Speaker 2: own back?

708
00:32:30,920 --> 00:32:32,840
Speaker 1: If you catch my drift, I actually I have no

709
00:32:32,920 --> 00:32:36,240
Speaker 1: idea what we're saying. Sometimes we get lost in the sauce,

710
00:32:36,240 --> 00:32:38,520
Speaker 1: but we always find our way back, baby, we do.

711
00:32:38,760 --> 00:32:42,520
Speaker 1: He was making sure that I was pleased. Hey hey,

712
00:32:42,600 --> 00:32:44,440
Speaker 1: he kept teasing me. Though it ended up with me

713
00:32:44,520 --> 00:32:49,240
Speaker 1: climaxing the hardest I have ever in my entire life.

714
00:32:50,320 --> 00:32:56,040
Speaker 1: In fact, in fact, I climax so hard I popped

715
00:32:56,160 --> 00:32:58,400
Speaker 1: a blood vessel in my eyeball.

716
00:32:58,880 --> 00:33:02,440
Speaker 2: What wow, Literally that sounds like a good time.

717
00:33:03,560 --> 00:33:06,520
Speaker 1: She's enjoying herself. Gosh yeah, popping a blood vessel and

718
00:33:06,520 --> 00:33:07,640
Speaker 1: an eyeball crazy.

719
00:33:08,120 --> 00:33:10,600
Speaker 2: It's like your eyeball just go completely bloodshot, Like what

720
00:33:10,680 --> 00:33:11,920
Speaker 2: happens when you come.

721
00:33:12,040 --> 00:33:15,120
Speaker 1: There's like a big It's almost like someone just put

722
00:33:15,160 --> 00:33:17,560
Speaker 1: a droplet of like blood in your in the whites

723
00:33:17,600 --> 00:33:19,440
Speaker 1: of your eyes, like you can see a big red

724
00:33:19,480 --> 00:33:23,480
Speaker 1: blotch there? Does it go away? Well? We might find out.

725
00:33:24,120 --> 00:33:24,360
Speaker 2: See.

726
00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:28,280
Speaker 1: So, so yesterday I walked up for the family pictures

727
00:33:28,560 --> 00:33:31,920
Speaker 1: with my eye filled with blood the pictures. Oh I

728
00:33:32,040 --> 00:33:36,600
Speaker 1: forgot about the pictures. Oh my god, right, like, who

729
00:33:36,640 --> 00:33:41,920
Speaker 1: would have thought? Who would have thought that? Not I dude,

730
00:33:42,760 --> 00:33:44,840
Speaker 1: I walked in for the family pictures with my eyes

731
00:33:44,840 --> 00:33:47,160
Speaker 1: filled with blood for the pictures that were supposed to

732
00:33:47,160 --> 00:33:49,320
Speaker 1: be a memory we could have is how strong we

733
00:33:49,480 --> 00:33:50,880
Speaker 1: are together? Wow?

734
00:33:51,200 --> 00:33:54,960
Speaker 2: Wow that that is a beautiful sentiment. But unfortunately you

735
00:33:55,000 --> 00:33:55,720
Speaker 2: got blood eyes.

736
00:33:55,800 --> 00:33:59,560
Speaker 1: Great in theory, I had to make up a story

737
00:33:59,640 --> 00:34:02,120
Speaker 1: about hitting my eye on the corner of a cupboard

738
00:34:02,360 --> 00:34:05,480
Speaker 1: in order for my siblings not to lose it. That's

739
00:34:05,480 --> 00:34:07,560
Speaker 1: a little I don't know, like I would be like, yo,

740
00:34:07,600 --> 00:34:09,759
Speaker 1: what happened? But also like your eyes bleeding? So I'm

741
00:34:09,800 --> 00:34:10,959
Speaker 1: not going to press you too much.

742
00:34:11,239 --> 00:34:14,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm I would be curious, like I think I

743
00:34:14,680 --> 00:34:17,160
Speaker 2: would ask, just because like I want to see, like

744
00:34:17,200 --> 00:34:20,560
Speaker 2: how do I avoid popping my own Eyeball right? You know,

745
00:34:20,680 --> 00:34:22,640
Speaker 2: like let me learn from your mistakes. Yeah, like what

746
00:34:22,680 --> 00:34:23,120
Speaker 2: did you do?

747
00:34:23,200 --> 00:34:26,239
Speaker 1: And then nop, He's like, uh like walking through So

748
00:34:27,400 --> 00:34:29,879
Speaker 1: I ran into a cupboard, It's fine. So they made

749
00:34:29,960 --> 00:34:33,040
Speaker 1: me stay in profile to try and cover up the bloody.

750
00:34:32,719 --> 00:34:36,000
Speaker 2: Eye or just like turn around, op, just like face

751
00:34:36,120 --> 00:34:37,040
Speaker 2: away from the camera.

752
00:34:37,239 --> 00:34:39,919
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's I mean, dude, the back of my head

753
00:34:40,600 --> 00:34:42,080
Speaker 1: and this is kind of fun. She had some quick

754
00:34:42,120 --> 00:34:44,799
Speaker 1: like Q and A's so the first one. It can

755
00:34:44,840 --> 00:34:47,840
Speaker 1: be photoshopped, yes, most likely. Still, it doesn't stop my

756
00:34:47,880 --> 00:34:50,279
Speaker 1: siblings from freaking out. Why abstained for a year? My

757
00:34:50,360 --> 00:34:53,040
Speaker 1: sex drive was epped up because of anidepressants, and I

758
00:34:53,120 --> 00:34:56,279
Speaker 1: decided to do a cleanse while it healed. Uh did

759
00:34:56,280 --> 00:34:58,480
Speaker 1: you see the guy again? He called me today and

760
00:34:58,480 --> 00:35:00,799
Speaker 1: we talked about getting to know each other. Very nice

761
00:35:01,440 --> 00:35:04,479
Speaker 1: and can this really happen? Yes, you can pop blood

762
00:35:04,560 --> 00:35:06,840
Speaker 1: vessels from a bunch of things. Apparently this is the

763
00:35:06,840 --> 00:35:09,920
Speaker 1: first time it happened to me. Wow, learn something new

764
00:35:10,040 --> 00:35:11,600
Speaker 1: every day if you really really do