WEBVTT - STILL Single and Famously Available

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<v Speaker 1>iHeart Podcasts bring you the ultimate summer of love treat.

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<v Speaker 2>This is Famously Available.

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome back to Famously Available. It's Deanna with you and

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<v Speaker 1>we're back guys for more because we are still available.

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<v Speaker 1>We've got a lot to catch up on and some

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<v Speaker 1>new ladies are in the mix. Kathy, I am still available.

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<v Speaker 2>So am I, Deanna.

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<v Speaker 1>How does this happen?

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know. Can you tell me?

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<v Speaker 1>Something is not right in the world. The stars have

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<v Speaker 1>not aligned.

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<v Speaker 2>I got nothing here.

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<v Speaker 3>I don't know.

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<v Speaker 2>What's been up with you? Tell me what's been going

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<v Speaker 2>on with you since we last chatted.

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<v Speaker 1>I did dip my toes in.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay.

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<v Speaker 1>Into a relationship.

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<v Speaker 2>Tell me.

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<v Speaker 1>I like dated a guy and just him for like

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<v Speaker 1>three months.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it was kind of wild. We like, we're like,

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<v Speaker 1>It was really intense from the start.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>Sounds good. Obviously something happened.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, you know that you're not quite ready for an

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<v Speaker 1>intense relationship when it's a panty dropper if he just

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<v Speaker 1>carries toilet paper up the stairs.

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<v Speaker 2>Are we talking love bombing with toilet paper? What are

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<v Speaker 2>we talking here?

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<v Speaker 1>No, like for the first time in my life, this

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<v Speaker 1>man carried things up the stairs without having to be asked.

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<v Speaker 1>And I was like, have me Lord.

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<v Speaker 2>I am yours. So what's wrong with him?

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<v Speaker 1>Well, I don't think we have enough time today because

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<v Speaker 1>Annalise is here and Cindy. You know, I think that

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<v Speaker 1>it was really intense from the start. And when it

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<v Speaker 1>is that hot and heavy from the beginning, you miss things.

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<v Speaker 1>You don't pay attention to red flags. And I really

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<v Speaker 1>don't want to make the same mistakes twice. So I

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<v Speaker 1>kept taking note of things. And then it took one

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<v Speaker 1>thing to happen. And I was like, yeah, I was like,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm all done. I'm all done. I will not go

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<v Speaker 1>backwards in life. I have been in a really awful

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<v Speaker 1>marriage relationship for 15 years. I won't do it again.

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<v Speaker 1>You don't get a free pass on bad behavior.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay. So since you and I have been together in December,

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<v Speaker 2>I actually did not date very much until the last,

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<v Speaker 2>let's call it six weeks, two months ago. And I

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<v Speaker 2>met like four guys, like ping pong. It was just boom, boom, boom. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>it was crazy.

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<v Speaker 1>That's three more than me. Well, hold on.

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<v Speaker 2>The first guy, let's just talk about the two that

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<v Speaker 2>are worth it. Wait, wait, wait, wait.

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<v Speaker 1>I just want to acknowledge that like you had options.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, wait till you hear my story and then you

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<v Speaker 2>might change your, you might change that decision. The first

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<v Speaker 2>guy was great. I was like, how did I, literally,

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<v Speaker 2>I thank you, God, you finally have brought my chapter two.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm so excited. And it was great until he literally

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<v Speaker 2>flipped out about his son who had some problems. And

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<v Speaker 2>when I tell you, It was Jekyll and Hyde. So

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<v Speaker 2>he was gently kicked to the curb and then quickly

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<v Speaker 2>moved on. And then I met this great guy recently.

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<v Speaker 2>We had two of the best dates ever. We were

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<v Speaker 2>so aligned on everything you could imagine. Politics, religion, what

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<v Speaker 2>we like to do with our life, all of it.

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<v Speaker 2>And then he ghosted me. So I don't know. So yes,

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<v Speaker 2>I am famously or not available.

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<v Speaker 1>So what you're telling us ladies is that it doesn't

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<v Speaker 1>get better with age.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, you know what? I'm the eternal optimist. So I

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<v Speaker 2>am still romantically hopeful, a hopeful romantic, whatever. But I'm

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<v Speaker 2>really at a point in my life where now I'm

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<v Speaker 2>confused because I really thought that that the first guy,

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<v Speaker 2>and then he flipped out. And I thought, okay, you know, whatever.

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<v Speaker 2>But then when I met the second guy and we

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<v Speaker 2>had these incredible two dates and he didn't love bomb me,

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<v Speaker 2>but our communication style was so aligned. Everything that you

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<v Speaker 2>read about that you want in a guy and that

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<v Speaker 2>he should want in you. Again, I was, thank you, Lord.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, everyone has a misstep, but thank you for

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<v Speaker 2>this guy. And then ghosted. So I'm left very perplexed.

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<v Speaker 2>I really, to be fair, I want to text him

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<v Speaker 2>and ask why. I want to know why he ghosted

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<v Speaker 2>me because I don't understand. He told me how smart

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<v Speaker 2>I was, how beautiful I was, how he loved my energy.

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<v Speaker 2>He loved everything about me and he ghosted me. Some

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<v Speaker 2>people might say, you know, what's ghosting? So we had

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<v Speaker 2>our first date and then he went four or five

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<v Speaker 2>days and then he called me and I said, oh,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm so surprised to hear from you. And he said, why?

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<v Speaker 2>And I said, because I haven't heard from you and

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<v Speaker 2>I thought you weren't interested. And he goes, oh no,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm very interested. I just, I have a lot going

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<v Speaker 2>on with my lawyers. He runs some businesses. I'm very busy.

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<v Speaker 2>So then we had the second great date and I said, look,

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<v Speaker 2>I don't need to hear from you every day, but

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<v Speaker 2>if you're interested, I need to know that you're around.

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<v Speaker 2>And it has been now like 10 days, nothing.

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<v Speaker 3>What was the last communication between you two?

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<v Speaker 2>He actually had talked about getting together. He said he

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<v Speaker 2>had these two days available. And then he got sick

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<v Speaker 2>with some stomach virus. And I, because I actually have

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<v Speaker 2>learned that kindness, in my world, kindness counts. I offered

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<v Speaker 2>to bring him soup or whatever he needed. He said,

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<v Speaker 2>no thanks, but I'll let you know.

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<v Speaker 1>Kathy, you're a better woman than me. I've been like,

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<v Speaker 1>oh my God, you've got the pukes. I'll see you

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<v Speaker 1>in six months.

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<v Speaker 2>I didn't want any part of that. I didn't. So

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<v Speaker 2>here we are, six months later, you and I are

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<v Speaker 2>still famously available. And now we have these other two

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<v Speaker 2>lovely ladies here.

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<v Speaker 1>It's still available.

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<v Speaker 2>Annalise and Cindy, who are also still available, so take

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<v Speaker 2>it away.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, so you've heard enough about what we have been

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<v Speaker 1>through over the last six months. And I hate to

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<v Speaker 1>encourage you into the dating scene, but like join the pool.

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<v Speaker 1>I hear you guys are still available.

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<v Speaker 3>Cindy?

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<v Speaker 4>Oh, I'm still available. I'm fresh off of this show.

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<v Speaker 4>And I dated for a little while and dated furiously.

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<v Speaker 2>You can't.

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<v Speaker 1>Like, give us some. Like, tell us what dating was like.

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<v Speaker 1>Did people know you? Did they know you from the show?

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<v Speaker 1>Or did you just find these guys off the street?

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<v Speaker 4>I had some people slide into my DMs and, you know,

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<v Speaker 4>meet me, came in from out of town.

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<v Speaker 1>And that was great.

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<v Speaker 4>And of course, they knew from the show I'm willing

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<v Speaker 4>to move somewhere else. But- what is difficult to understand

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<v Speaker 4>is you can't get to know one another in that environment.

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<v Speaker 4>On the show, I had a great chance during the

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<v Speaker 4>bachelor to kind of accelerate all of that. And then

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<v Speaker 4>once They think that they could replicate that in real life,

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<v Speaker 4>and it just doesn't happen that way.

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<v Speaker 1>Show up and be yourself. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 4>And then the red flags start coming out or those

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<v Speaker 4>traits that are annoying.

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<v Speaker 5>You're like, wow.

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<v Speaker 1>You really had men slide into your DMs?

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<v Speaker 2>Okay.

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<v Speaker 1>That never happens to me. And travel from out of state.

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<v Speaker 2>I would take that.

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<v Speaker 1>I would take that. Fly on over.

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<v Speaker 3>Come.

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<v Speaker 1>They were great people. They were really great individuals.

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<v Speaker 2>Go ahead, Kathy.

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<v Speaker 1>Kathy has something to say.

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<v Speaker 2>Kathy's been walking this journey with me. I live in

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<v Speaker 2>the same, we both live in Austin. I know Cindy.

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<v Speaker 2>We are very good friends. And she nicknames her guys

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<v Speaker 2>so I know who she's talking about.

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<v Speaker 1>You do not do that?

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I know you do.

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<v Speaker 2>Are you kidding me?

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<v Speaker 1>How do you keep them straight?

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<v Speaker 2>John and Bill? I do nickname them. You do?

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<v Speaker 3>One.

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<v Speaker 2>Two months later, one. This girl has men. So be honest.

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<v Speaker 2>She has a roster?

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know. Okay, so there has been a cycle.

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<v Speaker 1>For the young girls, I think a roster means you're

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<v Speaker 1>sleeping with them. No, that doesn't. Are you getting down, Cindy?

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<v Speaker 3>No, no.

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<v Speaker 1>Tell those girls who need to. No, I'm not getting down.

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<v Speaker 4>And when I was dating several people, I got very discouraged.

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<v Speaker 1>And so- Kathy is rolling her eyes, but I'm just

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<v Speaker 1>telling you how it actually felt.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm playing the violin because I know the truth there.

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<v Speaker 1>Kathy would like to play the roster.

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<v Speaker 4>Just because there are people who are interested doesn't mean

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<v Speaker 4>I'm dating them. So they might be communicating with me,

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<v Speaker 4>but it doesn't mean I'm dating them. So having said that,

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<v Speaker 4>I went through a period of time where I kind

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<v Speaker 4>of had given up, and I thought I'm just going

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<v Speaker 4>to put it all on pause. And I'll tell you

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<v Speaker 4>what happened. I met Kendra Scott and Zach Brown. And

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<v Speaker 4>Kendra Scott is a jewelry designer from Austin. And of course,

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<v Speaker 4>we all know Zach Brown.

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<v Speaker 1>He puts his toes in the water and his ass

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<v Speaker 1>in the sand.

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<v Speaker 2>Exactly.

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<v Speaker 1>Keep it going. They have been through hell in their relationships.

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<v Speaker 1>And they found each other.

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<v Speaker 4>What do you call it? Not their producer, but their

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<v Speaker 4>PR person introduced them. And they really have hit it off.

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<v Speaker 4>And I watched them together and it literally brought a

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<v Speaker 4>tear to my eye. And I thought it is possible

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<v Speaker 4>for these two people to go through hell and to

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<v Speaker 4>find each other and to find love again. It actually

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<v Speaker 4>helped me come back to life and say, my guy's

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<v Speaker 4>probably out there. I will remain open to it. I

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<v Speaker 4>may not seek it in the same way, but I

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<v Speaker 4>am open to it again.

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<v Speaker 2>So thank you, Kendra.

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<v Speaker 1>Thank you, Zach.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah and can I please have your cast off Cindy

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<v Speaker 2>because your stable is so full she needs four more bales.

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<v Speaker 5>Of hay feed the girls okay Annalise tell us what

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<v Speaker 5>you are doing I have someone for Annalise I'm really

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<v Speaker 5>like stewing about so it's.

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<v Speaker 3>Funny that you say that because I do think that

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<v Speaker 3>that's the number one way that I meet people these

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<v Speaker 3>days is I'm on Raya that's the only dating site

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<v Speaker 3>I'm on but I really.

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<v Speaker 1>Don't use it I've been on the wait list for

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<v Speaker 1>like three years.

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<v Speaker 3>I don't know what the rules are to get people on,

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<v Speaker 3>but it's very strange because I've heard from so many

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<v Speaker 3>people that they can't get on and you should absolutely

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<v Speaker 3>be on.

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<v Speaker 1>Don't you think? Yes.

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<v Speaker 3>But also at the same time, you're not missing much.

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<v Speaker 2>You're not missing anything.

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<v Speaker 3>So I wouldn't, you know, don't hold your breath that

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<v Speaker 3>like Mr. Right is there because I mean, I have

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<v Speaker 3>met guys from that. I've had relationships from from Raya

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<v Speaker 3>from other dating sites in the past.

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<v Speaker 2>Wait you've had relationships I.

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<v Speaker 3>Have I would say my last two relationships were from

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<v Speaker 3>people that I met on Raya.

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<v Speaker 1>In town or out of town?

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<v Speaker 3>One started out of town, then was in town, and

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<v Speaker 3>then the other one was in town.

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<v Speaker 2>Would you move?

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<v Speaker 3>Absolutely. I'm a free bird right now. I mean, it

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<v Speaker 3>depends where to.

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<v Speaker 1>Kathy, we're going to get her to Austin.

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<v Speaker 3>But I do like being near... A coast, so I

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<v Speaker 3>don't know. I don't know. Austin's near a coast.

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<v Speaker 2>The Gulf Coast.

0:10:31.580 --> 0:10:34.160
<v Speaker 1>Well, they have a lake. A lake is a little

0:10:34.200 --> 0:10:36.080
<v Speaker 1>different from... We're only.

0:10:35.860 --> 0:10:38.620
<v Speaker 2>A couple hours from the Gulf Coast. We got red tide.

0:10:38.660 --> 0:10:40.740
<v Speaker 2>We got it all. We're sending you to Austin.

0:10:40.780 --> 0:10:46.000
<v Speaker 3>Okay. Yeah, but dating, my last relationship ended two years ago,

0:10:46.140 --> 0:10:51.070
<v Speaker 3>and I have not dated. And honestly, I don't miss

0:10:51.110 --> 0:10:53.950
<v Speaker 3>it that much. I don't care that much. I'm not

0:10:54.150 --> 0:10:59.590
<v Speaker 3>actively seeking... a person, I feel like, uh, yeah, like

0:10:59.650 --> 0:11:01.760
<v Speaker 3>I said, the people that I've met are set up.

0:11:01.820 --> 0:11:04.240
<v Speaker 2>You are a lot younger than I am. The fact

0:11:04.280 --> 0:11:08.000
<v Speaker 2>that you have not dated anyone in two years, I'm

0:11:08.059 --> 0:11:12.280
<v Speaker 2>very curious about that. You don't have children. You have

0:11:12.679 --> 0:11:16.330
<v Speaker 2>some freedom in your life. What is it that is

0:11:16.450 --> 0:11:22.170
<v Speaker 2>keeping you from actively engaging, you know, in the dating scene?

0:11:22.510 --> 0:11:24.819
<v Speaker 3>I think for the longest time, especially like when I

0:11:24.840 --> 0:11:26.760
<v Speaker 3>was on The Bachelor and just how I was when

0:11:26.800 --> 0:11:31.540
<v Speaker 3>I was young, I was so hungry for marriage and kids.

0:11:31.600 --> 0:11:34.340
<v Speaker 3>That's like what I really put most of my identity

0:11:34.500 --> 0:11:38.339
<v Speaker 3>into is wanting that. And I think I've done that

0:11:38.500 --> 0:11:41.520
<v Speaker 3>for such a long time. And I've had some great

0:11:41.559 --> 0:11:44.490
<v Speaker 3>relationships and then a lot that have just really kind

0:11:44.540 --> 0:11:47.760
<v Speaker 3>of knocked me in a place where I'm like, I

0:11:48.340 --> 0:11:48.870
<v Speaker 3>have no.

0:11:48.760 --> 0:11:49.490
<v Speaker 1>Faith in the opposite sex.

0:11:49.500 --> 0:11:51.510
<v Speaker 2>So now do you see, are you the girl now

0:11:51.590 --> 0:11:53.570
<v Speaker 2>that you meet a guy and you see the, you know,

0:11:53.590 --> 0:11:55.230
<v Speaker 2>a red, you see.

0:11:55.090 --> 0:11:56.449
<v Speaker 1>A yellow flag.

0:11:56.490 --> 0:11:59.450
<v Speaker 3>I pay attention now. And I don't, I'm somebody who

0:11:59.490 --> 0:12:02.050
<v Speaker 3>sees the best in everyone. And so it's really hard

0:12:02.120 --> 0:12:05.270
<v Speaker 3>because it's, If I, and I'm just, I'm not seeing

0:12:05.309 --> 0:12:08.410
<v Speaker 3>potential anymore. That's where I'm trying to be like, okay, yeah,

0:12:08.450 --> 0:12:10.510
<v Speaker 3>this person could be a great person. They could be

0:12:10.650 --> 0:12:13.720
<v Speaker 3>my person. If this X, Y, and Z thing happened, no, that's,

0:12:14.340 --> 0:12:15.680
<v Speaker 3>then it's not going to work.

0:12:15.780 --> 0:12:17.260
<v Speaker 1>Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think you get

0:12:17.300 --> 0:12:18.960
<v Speaker 1>to a place in your life, like we're not looking

0:12:18.980 --> 0:12:20.140
<v Speaker 1>for fixer uppers anymore.

0:12:20.320 --> 0:12:22.740
<v Speaker 3>No, this is the thing. I always say after my

0:12:22.780 --> 0:12:25.840
<v Speaker 3>last relationship, I need someone who adds ease to my

0:12:25.900 --> 0:12:29.010
<v Speaker 3>life and adds value. And my life is really fulfilled

0:12:29.150 --> 0:12:31.550
<v Speaker 3>on its own. So unless somebody, and I know it's

0:12:31.570 --> 0:12:33.260
<v Speaker 3>like a big, It's a big ask. It's putting a

0:12:33.260 --> 0:12:35.380
<v Speaker 3>lot of pressure on somebody, but also at the same time,

0:12:35.679 --> 0:12:37.929
<v Speaker 3>those should be easy things for the person that's your

0:12:37.950 --> 0:12:38.290
<v Speaker 3>right person.

0:12:38.309 --> 0:12:39.309
<v Speaker 2>I'm going to call you on that.

0:12:39.350 --> 0:12:39.510
<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

0:12:39.809 --> 0:12:42.770
<v Speaker 2>Is it putting a lot of pressure? I'm way older

0:12:42.809 --> 0:12:45.310
<v Speaker 2>than you, and I'm looking for a man who adds

0:12:45.390 --> 0:12:47.770
<v Speaker 2>to my life. So why is that putting pressure on

0:12:47.809 --> 0:12:48.929
<v Speaker 2>a guy? I'm curious.

0:12:49.010 --> 0:12:52.040
<v Speaker 3>Well, I just think that... I think some people would say, like,

0:12:52.700 --> 0:12:55.839
<v Speaker 3>maybe to the extent if they're reading it through a

0:12:55.860 --> 0:12:58.800
<v Speaker 3>different lens, like, oh, you need somebody that's adding ease

0:12:58.820 --> 0:13:00.780
<v Speaker 3>to your life. They're doing all of these things for you.

0:13:00.880 --> 0:13:03.780
<v Speaker 3>But really, I need somebody who's just doing, like, carrying

0:13:03.800 --> 0:13:04.940
<v Speaker 3>the toilet paper up the stairs.

0:13:04.960 --> 0:13:06.060
<v Speaker 1>Basic level things.

0:13:06.100 --> 0:13:06.980
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, to make my life easier.

0:13:07.059 --> 0:13:08.719
<v Speaker 1>I need a man who can outman me.

0:13:08.800 --> 0:13:10.900
<v Speaker 3>And who can see where I'm like, if I'm having,

0:13:11.380 --> 0:13:13.000
<v Speaker 3>I've had a lot of family issues in the last

0:13:13.020 --> 0:13:16.010
<v Speaker 3>couple years. And it, you know, somebody who's just like, oh,

0:13:16.270 --> 0:13:18.670
<v Speaker 3>let me grab dinner for you guys so that you

0:13:18.690 --> 0:13:20.270
<v Speaker 3>don't have to think about it because I know you've

0:13:20.309 --> 0:13:22.790
<v Speaker 3>had so much stuff going on. Just like thinking about

0:13:22.830 --> 0:13:24.570
<v Speaker 3>the things that could make your life better.

0:13:35.900 --> 0:13:39.080
<v Speaker 2>So you know what I'm hearing? We are all, I think,

0:13:39.300 --> 0:13:41.760
<v Speaker 2>each a decade apart or close to it.

0:13:41.760 --> 0:13:42.880
<v Speaker 1>I think we're about the same age.

0:13:42.940 --> 0:13:44.730
<v Speaker 2>Oh, you guys are the same age? Okay, well.

0:13:44.750 --> 0:13:47.150
<v Speaker 1>I know she looks 10 years younger. She does.

0:13:47.190 --> 0:13:47.530
<v Speaker 5>Kathy.

0:13:47.550 --> 0:13:50.910
<v Speaker 2>No, but what I'm saying here is Cindy and I

0:13:50.929 --> 0:13:55.250
<v Speaker 2>are like, what, nine years apart. We are all seeing

0:13:55.309 --> 0:13:58.240
<v Speaker 2>the same thing. I find it so interesting that the

0:13:58.280 --> 0:13:59.960
<v Speaker 2>dynamic doesn't change.

0:14:00.100 --> 0:14:02.059
<v Speaker 4>I also think there's a difference, and I know I

0:14:02.100 --> 0:14:05.040
<v Speaker 4>have felt it. There's a difference between when you're dating-

0:14:05.520 --> 0:14:07.660
<v Speaker 4>and when you're looking for a relationship.

0:14:08.270 --> 0:14:12.080
<v Speaker 1>I 1,000% agree. I believe that dating looks very different

0:14:12.120 --> 0:14:14.420
<v Speaker 1>for me now than when I was younger and I

0:14:14.480 --> 0:14:17.760
<v Speaker 1>wanted marriage and kids. Dating looked very different. I was

0:14:17.860 --> 0:14:21.180
<v Speaker 1>willing to have a fixer-upper and do life. I am

0:14:21.220 --> 0:14:24.100
<v Speaker 1>no longer looking for those things. Therefore, dating looks very

0:14:24.240 --> 0:14:24.760
<v Speaker 1>different for me.

0:14:24.760 --> 0:14:25.820
<v Speaker 2>What does it look like for you?

0:14:26.340 --> 0:14:27.800
<v Speaker 1>Well, I said it a second ago. I need a

0:14:27.820 --> 0:14:30.380
<v Speaker 1>man who can outman me. I have a job. I

0:14:30.420 --> 0:14:33.240
<v Speaker 1>put a roof over my kids' heads. I pay for everything.

0:14:33.540 --> 0:14:36.640
<v Speaker 1>I fix things. I do things. So in order to...

0:14:37.670 --> 0:14:41.030
<v Speaker 1>Have a partner, which I believe we're designed for.

0:14:41.050 --> 0:14:42.450
<v Speaker 3>Amen.

0:14:42.790 --> 0:14:44.350
<v Speaker 1>He's got to be able to outman me.

0:14:44.370 --> 0:14:48.250
<v Speaker 2>He needs to add to his relationship. What does that

0:14:48.290 --> 0:14:50.730
<v Speaker 2>look like? Not carrying the toilet paper. What does that mean?

0:14:50.750 --> 0:14:52.050
<v Speaker 1>Does he pay for your house?

0:14:52.100 --> 0:14:53.700
<v Speaker 2>Does he bring home the dinner?

0:14:53.720 --> 0:14:55.440
<v Speaker 1>No, I don't need to be taken care of. I'm

0:14:55.480 --> 0:14:56.760
<v Speaker 1>not a taken care of girl.

0:14:56.840 --> 0:14:58.080
<v Speaker 2>I have a career.

0:14:58.440 --> 0:15:01.420
<v Speaker 1>I need emotional stability. There you go. I need emotional stability.

0:15:01.620 --> 0:15:04.420
<v Speaker 1>I need a man who is emotionally mature. Available.

0:15:04.460 --> 0:15:05.340
<v Speaker 2>Who can handle his life.

0:15:06.560 --> 0:15:09.160
<v Speaker 3>But that's also not going to be another child, like

0:15:09.210 --> 0:15:11.350
<v Speaker 3>somebody you don't have to take care of. They can

0:15:11.390 --> 0:15:13.670
<v Speaker 3>take care of themselves. They can stand on their own

0:15:13.690 --> 0:15:16.110
<v Speaker 3>two feet. They don't need you to mother them or

0:15:16.170 --> 0:15:17.390
<v Speaker 3>to like do, you know.

0:15:18.390 --> 0:15:21.600
<v Speaker 2>So I have found, Cindy and I have talked about this.

0:15:22.020 --> 0:15:28.600
<v Speaker 2>I have found that men want to take, they want

0:15:28.620 --> 0:15:32.390
<v Speaker 2>to use their money or position to, to manage me,

0:15:32.810 --> 0:15:34.290
<v Speaker 2>to control me.

0:15:34.390 --> 0:15:36.050
<v Speaker 1>Because that works with so many women.

0:15:36.070 --> 0:15:38.350
<v Speaker 2>It works with so many women. Do you guys find

0:15:38.390 --> 0:15:42.770
<v Speaker 2>that at your age, that the men you meet, if

0:15:42.820 --> 0:15:45.600
<v Speaker 2>they can't take care of you, if they can't support you,

0:15:45.980 --> 0:15:49.720
<v Speaker 2>if you don't need them, then they're out.

0:15:50.140 --> 0:15:52.240
<v Speaker 1>I don't know that I have ever dated a man

0:15:52.280 --> 0:15:54.800
<v Speaker 1>who is financially stable enough to take care of me.

0:15:55.220 --> 0:15:55.980
<v Speaker 2>Oh, interesting.

0:15:56.060 --> 0:15:58.560
<v Speaker 1>And I don't want to be the sugar mama. That

0:15:58.600 --> 0:16:00.380
<v Speaker 1>is not a role I am signing up for.

0:16:00.880 --> 0:16:05.090
<v Speaker 3>I've dated both. I've dated very, very successful, but never

0:16:05.430 --> 0:16:08.710
<v Speaker 3>once was I like, buy me things. I'm not that

0:16:08.770 --> 0:16:09.040
<v Speaker 3>girl at all.

0:16:09.050 --> 0:16:09.490
<v Speaker 2>No, we're not that girl.

0:16:09.510 --> 0:16:12.150
<v Speaker 3>I would be like, even if they, you know. No, no, no, no, no, no.

0:16:12.250 --> 0:16:14.360
<v Speaker 2>Annalisa, I don't mean buy you things. What I meant

0:16:14.420 --> 0:16:20.880
<v Speaker 2>was a man who has liquidity. He has money. And

0:16:20.960 --> 0:16:23.780
<v Speaker 2>so he can take you on, I'm making this up.

0:16:24.040 --> 0:16:26.010
<v Speaker 2>He could take you on a trip to Italy, but

0:16:26.090 --> 0:16:27.930
<v Speaker 2>that comes with money.

0:16:29.110 --> 0:16:29.270
<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

0:16:29.530 --> 0:16:30.410
<v Speaker 2>It's a quid pro quo.

0:16:30.430 --> 0:16:31.750
<v Speaker 3>I don't think I, I just don't think I go

0:16:31.790 --> 0:16:32.480
<v Speaker 3>for those guys.

0:16:33.050 --> 0:16:35.280
<v Speaker 1>Well, I don't, I don't, you know, but I don't

0:16:35.320 --> 0:16:37.760
<v Speaker 1>see anything wrong with, with believing that I can have

0:16:37.780 --> 0:16:39.700
<v Speaker 1>it all. That's not the type of man that I

0:16:39.740 --> 0:16:44.680
<v Speaker 1>go for. Um, I I'm learning that after divorce, I'm

0:16:44.720 --> 0:16:46.600
<v Speaker 1>not really sure I know what my type is. So

0:16:46.620 --> 0:16:49.480
<v Speaker 1>the last guy that I dated for like three months, um,

0:16:49.620 --> 0:16:51.860
<v Speaker 1>our producer, Heather got to meet him once. He didn't,

0:16:52.120 --> 0:16:58.800
<v Speaker 1>he didn't look like my type, did he? Listen, he

0:16:58.840 --> 0:16:59.960
<v Speaker 1>was a very nice guy.

0:16:59.980 --> 0:17:05.199
<v Speaker 2>I remember being like, this. Heather, did you think he

0:17:05.260 --> 0:17:06.060
<v Speaker 2>was her type?

0:17:06.980 --> 0:17:10.690
<v Speaker 4>I think that Deanna was too pretty for him.

0:17:11.030 --> 0:17:11.760
<v Speaker 2>That's what I'm going to say.

0:17:11.810 --> 0:17:15.830
<v Speaker 1>Oh, you're so sweet. You're so sweet. He was really nice.

0:17:16.500 --> 0:17:20.330
<v Speaker 1>I think I am still trying to figure out what

0:17:20.369 --> 0:17:22.949
<v Speaker 1>it is that I want, right? Because I think when

0:17:22.990 --> 0:17:25.770
<v Speaker 1>I met my ex-husband, I was very young. I was

0:17:25.970 --> 0:17:29.100
<v Speaker 1>right off The Bachelorette. I was a little jaded in life.

0:17:29.619 --> 0:17:32.159
<v Speaker 1>I was confused. And I took the first man that

0:17:32.200 --> 0:17:34.900
<v Speaker 1>paid me a little bit of attention. Now, I need

0:17:34.920 --> 0:17:36.660
<v Speaker 1>to give him some credit. I believe that we were

0:17:36.770 --> 0:17:38.869
<v Speaker 1>destined to have children together. Without my children, I could

0:17:38.930 --> 0:17:42.210
<v Speaker 1>not have done that without him, right? So our souls

0:17:42.250 --> 0:17:44.389
<v Speaker 1>needed to align to do that. I'm not sure he

0:17:44.410 --> 0:17:46.389
<v Speaker 1>was my forever man. So I think that I am.

0:17:47.890 --> 0:17:50.450
<v Speaker 1>I think that I am still learning what that looks like.

0:17:50.550 --> 0:17:53.310
<v Speaker 1>This guy did not fit my physical type that I

0:17:53.350 --> 0:17:56.070
<v Speaker 1>typically dated. He was very beefy. He was a big man.

0:17:56.090 --> 0:18:00.660
<v Speaker 1>You're not clear.

0:18:00.840 --> 0:18:02.240
<v Speaker 2>You're not clear what you want.

0:18:02.540 --> 0:18:03.680
<v Speaker 1>No, I am clear what I want.

0:18:03.720 --> 0:18:05.020
<v Speaker 2>What do you want? Emotionally.

0:18:05.160 --> 0:18:08.040
<v Speaker 1>Physically, I'm still figuring that out. Sometimes I still teeter

0:18:08.060 --> 0:18:10.780
<v Speaker 1>back and forth with whether he needs to be tall, dark,

0:18:10.820 --> 0:18:13.010
<v Speaker 1>and handsome or if he should be beefy where he

0:18:13.030 --> 0:18:15.050
<v Speaker 1>can throw me around a bit. Like that was fun.

0:18:15.630 --> 0:18:16.710
<v Speaker 1>That was kind of fun.

0:18:16.869 --> 0:18:20.550
<v Speaker 2>Whoa. This is R-rated, but keep on. Keep talking.

0:18:20.730 --> 0:18:24.840
<v Speaker 1>But there were just some things that didn't align right.

0:18:25.320 --> 0:18:27.219
<v Speaker 1>There were just some things that didn't align right, and

0:18:27.240 --> 0:18:29.500
<v Speaker 1>I was not willing to make excuses at this point

0:18:29.580 --> 0:18:30.140
<v Speaker 1>in my life.

0:18:30.300 --> 0:18:30.540
<v Speaker 5>Right.

0:18:32.040 --> 0:18:33.290
<v Speaker 2>He had kids. Yeah.

0:18:33.350 --> 0:18:33.619
<v Speaker 3>Did you?

0:18:33.980 --> 0:18:36.840
<v Speaker 1>How soon did you introduce kids to each other? I've

0:18:36.880 --> 0:18:39.020
<v Speaker 1>never introduced a man to my children. Not ever.

0:18:39.300 --> 0:18:41.560
<v Speaker 2>Cindy, do you know what you want in a man?

0:18:42.040 --> 0:18:44.770
<v Speaker 1>I feel like I have a pretty clear idea.

0:18:45.190 --> 0:18:46.050
<v Speaker 2>Tell me what it is.

0:18:46.910 --> 0:18:49.450
<v Speaker 4>I think that he has to have a very strong

0:18:49.510 --> 0:18:53.470
<v Speaker 4>spiritual life. He has to be family oriented, very intelligent,

0:18:54.150 --> 0:18:57.330
<v Speaker 4>emotionally accessible and intelligent.

0:18:58.000 --> 0:19:00.060
<v Speaker 1>Physically fit or be active. You know me.

0:19:00.080 --> 0:19:01.899
<v Speaker 4>I like to do a lot of different things. I'm

0:19:01.940 --> 0:19:03.740
<v Speaker 4>going all the time. And he has to be kind

0:19:03.780 --> 0:19:04.280
<v Speaker 4>of a foodie.

0:19:05.280 --> 0:19:06.220
<v Speaker 1>I want what she wants.

0:19:06.280 --> 0:19:06.720
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I know.

0:19:06.760 --> 0:19:07.740
<v Speaker 1>I want some of that, too.

0:19:07.800 --> 0:19:08.280
<v Speaker 3>A lot of that.

0:19:09.540 --> 0:19:11.140
<v Speaker 4>And he has to be the type of guy who

0:19:11.200 --> 0:19:14.220
<v Speaker 4>will hold out his hand as I walk down the stairs.

0:19:14.380 --> 0:19:14.600
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:19:14.980 --> 0:19:16.369
<v Speaker 1>He has to have a drink.

0:19:17.070 --> 0:19:19.629
<v Speaker 4>My Tito's Cosmo waiting for me at the bar if

0:19:19.670 --> 0:19:20.610
<v Speaker 4>I'm meeting him at night.

0:19:20.790 --> 0:19:21.290
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:19:21.310 --> 0:19:23.149
<v Speaker 1>That's what I want. Somebody, to your point, that's thoughtful

0:19:23.170 --> 0:19:23.669
<v Speaker 1>and thinks of me.

0:19:23.710 --> 0:19:28.940
<v Speaker 2>It's so funny because the older I get... The less

0:19:29.060 --> 0:19:32.120
<v Speaker 2>I care about the tall, dark, and handsome. I mean,

0:19:32.440 --> 0:19:35.850
<v Speaker 2>I'm almost 5'8, so I'm not dating a guy who's 5'7.

0:19:36.380 --> 0:19:42.030
<v Speaker 2>But the looks, the physicality aren't as important. Fitness, absolutely.

0:19:42.050 --> 0:19:43.250
<v Speaker 2>I agree with that. It changes a lot.

0:19:43.270 --> 0:19:45.650
<v Speaker 1>I'm not saying that it is that important, but there

0:19:45.770 --> 0:19:48.170
<v Speaker 1>still is an aspect at any age that there has

0:19:48.210 --> 0:19:49.290
<v Speaker 1>to be physical chemistry.

0:19:49.330 --> 0:19:49.570
<v Speaker 3>Agreed.

0:19:49.590 --> 0:19:49.970
<v Speaker 2>Very important.

0:19:50.040 --> 0:19:52.460
<v Speaker 1>You go I am willing to step out of what

0:19:52.520 --> 0:19:55.340
<v Speaker 1>I think my box is but there has to be

0:19:55.640 --> 0:19:56.740
<v Speaker 1>physical chemistry.

0:19:56.400 --> 0:19:58.540
<v Speaker 3>But I also think that's why being set up or

0:19:58.560 --> 0:20:01.200
<v Speaker 3>meeting people in the wild so to speak is so

0:20:01.420 --> 0:20:04.350
<v Speaker 3>important when you're not sure about because like the thing

0:20:04.390 --> 0:20:06.909
<v Speaker 3>with the dating apps is you are looking at people's

0:20:06.950 --> 0:20:09.710
<v Speaker 3>pictures you could be going a swiping left on your

0:20:09.830 --> 0:20:12.350
<v Speaker 3>dream personality.

0:20:11.690 --> 0:20:12.660
<v Speaker 1>And like- Just by how they look.

0:20:12.980 --> 0:20:15.900
<v Speaker 3>Just by how they look. And sometimes people take bad pictures,

0:20:15.960 --> 0:20:18.910
<v Speaker 3>you know, you never know. And so I do prefer

0:20:18.990 --> 0:20:22.600
<v Speaker 3>trying to meet people just- Through people, out and about.

0:20:22.619 --> 0:20:25.260
<v Speaker 2>Well, I'm just going to say any guy who's holding

0:20:25.320 --> 0:20:28.979
<v Speaker 2>up a dead fish in a bathroom with a baseball

0:20:29.000 --> 0:20:30.660
<v Speaker 2>cap on backwards, he's.

0:20:30.660 --> 0:20:32.140
<v Speaker 3>Probably not my guy.

0:20:32.240 --> 0:20:32.640
<v Speaker 5>I don't know.

0:20:32.780 --> 0:20:35.520
<v Speaker 1>I'm down with a little backwards baseball hat.

0:20:35.560 --> 0:20:36.200
<v Speaker 3>Oh, that's fine.

0:20:36.220 --> 0:20:37.300
<v Speaker 2>That's okay.

0:20:37.359 --> 0:20:38.400
<v Speaker 1>I also like fishing.

0:20:38.480 --> 0:20:42.070
<v Speaker 2>With a dead fish in the bathroom with his shirt off.

0:20:42.350 --> 0:20:44.129
<v Speaker 1>Well, I'm not sure why he's in the bathroom with

0:20:44.150 --> 0:20:47.290
<v Speaker 1>the dead fish. I don't know. We could pull up

0:20:47.369 --> 0:20:49.270
<v Speaker 1>Hinge and show you what's available.

0:20:49.570 --> 0:20:52.350
<v Speaker 3>In his bathroom that he's going to expect you to

0:20:52.450 --> 0:20:53.000
<v Speaker 3>do your makeup in.

0:20:53.030 --> 0:20:55.270
<v Speaker 2>He's trying to equate the size of the fish with

0:20:55.510 --> 0:21:00.760
<v Speaker 2>another appendage. Oh, my God. That's not it. I absolutely disagree.

0:21:01.480 --> 0:21:02.800
<v Speaker 1>Are you serious?

0:21:02.900 --> 0:21:03.960
<v Speaker 3>I've never heard that.

0:21:03.980 --> 0:21:10.520
<v Speaker 2>I absolutely disagree. That's a bigger crock. No, no, no.

0:21:11.440 --> 0:21:13.540
<v Speaker 4>Mostly we do not see, to be fair, we do

0:21:13.580 --> 0:21:15.740
<v Speaker 4>not see pictures of men holding fish in their bathrooms.

0:21:15.859 --> 0:21:18.290
<v Speaker 4>It's a collection of what we typically see of men

0:21:18.330 --> 0:21:19.050
<v Speaker 4>in our age group.

0:21:19.310 --> 0:21:19.889
<v Speaker 1>We pulled it up.

0:21:19.930 --> 0:21:22.530
<v Speaker 4>We were on a flight and I haven't been back

0:21:22.609 --> 0:21:24.210
<v Speaker 4>on hinge. I kind of bounce back in every now

0:21:24.230 --> 0:21:26.130
<v Speaker 4>and then just to kind of see what's out there.

0:21:26.210 --> 0:21:29.010
<v Speaker 4>And it is just so discouraging. It's why I choose

0:21:29.030 --> 0:21:29.750
<v Speaker 4>to meet as well.

0:21:29.790 --> 0:21:30.550
<v Speaker 1>People in the wild.

0:21:30.630 --> 0:21:33.470
<v Speaker 3>I also, I think I'm in a weird, I think,

0:21:33.650 --> 0:21:35.250
<v Speaker 3>I think we're similar ages, but I think it's a

0:21:35.369 --> 0:21:39.810
<v Speaker 3>very hard age to date because I'm 41. I don't

0:21:39.950 --> 0:21:43.380
<v Speaker 3>think I look 41. I don't act 41. I think

0:21:43.450 --> 0:21:48.500
<v Speaker 3>probably most men who are dating, uh, who would be

0:21:48.520 --> 0:21:52.040
<v Speaker 3>in my dating range are dating. They're stopping it at

0:21:52.080 --> 0:21:53.760
<v Speaker 3>like 39. So they're not even seeing me.

0:21:54.580 --> 0:21:56.700
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, what is your dating age? What's your range?

0:21:56.740 --> 0:22:02.180
<v Speaker 3>I would say like 37 to 52.

0:22:02.180 --> 0:22:04.950
<v Speaker 2>And I'm going to tell you, because you can look

0:22:04.970 --> 0:22:09.730
<v Speaker 2>it up online, I'm 73. And there isn't one man

0:22:09.810 --> 0:22:12.490
<v Speaker 2>my age that I've met who I would date because

0:22:12.530 --> 0:22:15.560
<v Speaker 2>they are used to guys. They do nothing. They used

0:22:15.580 --> 0:22:18.119
<v Speaker 2>to play tennis. They used to ski. They used to

0:22:18.180 --> 0:22:22.080
<v Speaker 2>ride bicycles. They do nothing. And the few men that I've,

0:22:22.220 --> 0:22:24.500
<v Speaker 2>this guy that I met that we had such a

0:22:24.520 --> 0:22:28.890
<v Speaker 2>great connection, he is, I think, five or six years

0:22:28.950 --> 0:22:33.530
<v Speaker 2>younger than I. He asked me, why are you dating younger?

0:22:34.390 --> 0:22:37.189
<v Speaker 2>Not in a critical sense, just he was curious. And

0:22:37.270 --> 0:22:42.200
<v Speaker 2>I said, because men my age don't have the energy

0:22:42.420 --> 0:22:44.060
<v Speaker 2>that I have and they don't do the things I

0:22:44.080 --> 0:22:48.460
<v Speaker 2>want to do. And so men, I literally was talking

0:22:48.500 --> 0:22:53.080
<v Speaker 2>to a couple of men from Golden Bachelor and they

0:22:53.140 --> 0:22:56.540
<v Speaker 2>are dating. One is dating a woman 23 years younger.

0:22:56.560 --> 0:22:57.140
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, exactly.

0:22:57.260 --> 0:23:00.490
<v Speaker 2>One is dating one 18 years younger. And they're like, well,

0:23:00.810 --> 0:23:07.220
<v Speaker 2>she's not that much younger. And so the relative age difference,

0:23:07.300 --> 0:23:11.810
<v Speaker 2>depending on where you are, is crazy to me. It's crazy.

0:23:23.170 --> 0:23:26.650
<v Speaker 1>Let me ask you something about that guy, Kathy, because

0:23:27.260 --> 0:23:29.439
<v Speaker 1>I'm a firm believer that people show us who they are.

0:23:29.460 --> 0:23:29.960
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:23:29.980 --> 0:23:30.180
<v Speaker 5>Right?

0:23:30.480 --> 0:23:30.680
<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

0:23:31.340 --> 0:23:34.080
<v Speaker 1>I believe he has shown you who he is by

0:23:34.500 --> 0:23:37.500
<v Speaker 1>just ghosting you. But I think that you need something.

0:23:37.640 --> 0:23:38.820
<v Speaker 1>What is it that you need?

0:23:40.660 --> 0:23:46.110
<v Speaker 2>You're going to make me cry. I'm a really tough

0:23:46.170 --> 0:23:50.350
<v Speaker 2>person to date because— I want it all. You know,

0:23:51.030 --> 0:23:54.390
<v Speaker 2>I'm not going to settle. And this guy was good looking.

0:23:54.770 --> 0:24:01.200
<v Speaker 2>He was athletic, smart, successful. Everything, he loves to travel.

0:24:01.320 --> 0:24:03.679
<v Speaker 2>We even have the same place that we want to

0:24:03.740 --> 0:24:08.139
<v Speaker 2>see that, you know, our next travel thing. To be ghosted,

0:24:09.700 --> 0:24:12.119
<v Speaker 2>I can take it. I'm strong. I want to know why.

0:24:12.859 --> 0:24:14.080
<v Speaker 2>Why did you ghost me?

0:24:14.740 --> 0:24:15.159
<v Speaker 1>Tell me.

0:24:15.530 --> 0:24:18.590
<v Speaker 2>Say you were too old. Tell me I met a

0:24:18.609 --> 0:24:21.490
<v Speaker 2>42-year-old that I fell in love with. I'm good with that.

0:24:22.050 --> 0:24:22.990
<v Speaker 2>I want to know.

0:24:23.750 --> 0:24:24.850
<v Speaker 1>You know what I truly believe?

0:24:24.869 --> 0:24:25.090
<v Speaker 3>What?

0:24:25.109 --> 0:24:27.550
<v Speaker 1>Is that no answer will give you the closure that

0:24:27.590 --> 0:24:28.910
<v Speaker 1>you desire.

0:24:28.930 --> 0:24:28.990
<v Speaker 3>No.

0:24:29.150 --> 0:24:31.050
<v Speaker 1>So it doesn't matter. If we were to call him

0:24:31.109 --> 0:24:32.570
<v Speaker 1>now and he were to answer the phone and he

0:24:32.590 --> 0:24:35.450
<v Speaker 1>would say, oh, Kathy, I'm sorry, I'm an idiot. I

0:24:35.490 --> 0:24:37.100
<v Speaker 1>just don't have the courage to tell you that it's

0:24:37.130 --> 0:24:39.380
<v Speaker 1>just not you. That answer still wouldn't be good enough.

0:24:39.450 --> 0:24:40.040
<v Speaker 5>Yes, it would.

0:24:41.210 --> 0:24:45.790
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it would. If a man said to me, I

0:24:45.810 --> 0:24:54.030
<v Speaker 2>don't know. I can't tell you why, but you're not it.

0:24:54.310 --> 0:24:55.390
<v Speaker 2>I'd be okay with that.

0:24:56.310 --> 0:24:57.610
<v Speaker 1>I think he is telling you that.

0:24:57.730 --> 0:25:02.210
<v Speaker 2>He is. But the closure I need is why.

0:25:02.470 --> 0:25:03.859
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, and we have talked about it.

0:25:03.859 --> 0:25:07.740
<v Speaker 2>Because that isn't, you know, they say watch what a

0:25:07.760 --> 0:25:12.160
<v Speaker 2>man does, not what he says. Everything when we were

0:25:12.920 --> 0:25:17.090
<v Speaker 2>having those dates was... So amazing.

0:25:17.210 --> 0:25:17.850
<v Speaker 1>It was magical.

0:25:17.930 --> 0:25:20.330
<v Speaker 2>I remember talking to her after. It was magical.

0:25:20.350 --> 0:25:20.990
<v Speaker 3>The conversations.

0:25:21.020 --> 0:25:23.420
<v Speaker 2>So I'm sitting here like, tell me, say, you know,

0:25:23.440 --> 0:25:27.480
<v Speaker 2>I got to thinking, you know, you don't need my money.

0:25:27.640 --> 0:25:31.479
<v Speaker 2>Whatever I could, any answer he would give me. But

0:25:31.540 --> 0:25:34.020
<v Speaker 2>to ghost me is so disrespectful.

0:25:34.040 --> 0:25:34.560
<v Speaker 3>It's so cruel.

0:25:34.700 --> 0:25:38.179
<v Speaker 1>I have absolutely just let it be known. I have

0:25:38.320 --> 0:25:41.780
<v Speaker 1>absolute no respect for a person who ghosts someone, who

0:25:41.820 --> 0:25:45.180
<v Speaker 1>doesn't have the courage to call someone and say, hey, babe,

0:25:45.200 --> 0:25:46.740
<v Speaker 1>it just wasn't you. I wish you well. Oh, I've

0:25:46.760 --> 0:25:48.139
<v Speaker 1>probably ghosted several people.

0:25:48.560 --> 0:25:49.300
<v Speaker 2>Really? Yeah.

0:25:49.800 --> 0:25:50.100
<v Speaker 3>Really?

0:25:50.400 --> 0:25:53.830
<v Speaker 1>I've never done it. Even if it's a simple like, hi.

0:25:54.720 --> 0:25:56.930
<v Speaker 4>Well, we'll have to maybe unpack it in a longer

0:25:56.990 --> 0:25:59.629
<v Speaker 4>segment because there's a lot to it. Part of it

0:25:59.690 --> 0:26:02.230
<v Speaker 4>is I don't want to hurt their feelings, that they're

0:26:02.330 --> 0:26:04.050
<v Speaker 4>a great person, they're just not my person.

0:26:04.710 --> 0:26:05.150
<v Speaker 3>Even that.

0:26:05.310 --> 0:26:07.460
<v Speaker 1>That's a simple, this isn't going to work.

0:26:07.500 --> 0:26:10.980
<v Speaker 2>And that's what I've said. It's okay to say you're

0:26:11.020 --> 0:26:12.899
<v Speaker 2>not my guy. I think you're a great guy, but

0:26:13.000 --> 0:26:16.419
<v Speaker 2>I'm just not feeling it. That is closure, Cindy.

0:26:16.609 --> 0:26:20.790
<v Speaker 1>But after two dates... Yeah, I think there's a line, right?

0:26:20.930 --> 0:26:22.650
<v Speaker 1>Two dates that feels like, hey, it didn't work.

0:26:22.850 --> 0:26:23.790
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. Right?

0:26:23.890 --> 0:26:26.470
<v Speaker 1>But if you've been in a relationship with someone, it is,

0:26:26.490 --> 0:26:27.970
<v Speaker 1>I think, the slightest bit.

0:26:28.070 --> 0:26:28.510
<v Speaker 5>Oh, my gosh.

0:26:28.550 --> 0:26:32.320
<v Speaker 1>If you're in a relationship, absolutely. You start sleeping with someone.

0:26:32.340 --> 0:26:35.200
<v Speaker 1>You have to have the respect to call someone and say,

0:26:35.220 --> 0:26:37.740
<v Speaker 1>this isn't for me. This is not working.

0:26:38.080 --> 0:26:39.020
<v Speaker 2>I wish you well, Godspeed.

0:26:39.040 --> 0:26:40.859
<v Speaker 3>But after two dates, that is a little tricky because

0:26:40.900 --> 0:26:44.850
<v Speaker 3>it is, you know, you don't know. He could be thinking, oh,

0:26:45.010 --> 0:26:47.330
<v Speaker 3>I just don't need to, I don't owe this explanation.

0:26:47.350 --> 0:26:47.429
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:26:47.859 --> 0:26:48.740
<v Speaker 3>Because it was only two dates.

0:26:48.780 --> 0:26:51.260
<v Speaker 2>But the conversations weren't of two dates.

0:26:51.300 --> 0:26:52.900
<v Speaker 3>No, and I understand that because I've, I mean, I've

0:26:52.920 --> 0:26:55.399
<v Speaker 3>had those as well where it's, you've been ghosted and

0:26:55.420 --> 0:26:58.150
<v Speaker 3>you think, man, we had such a connection. And it's

0:26:58.270 --> 0:27:00.490
<v Speaker 3>so hard because you just, you want to know, but.

0:27:01.530 --> 0:27:03.190
<v Speaker 4>Well, here's a question for you. What if he is

0:27:03.210 --> 0:27:06.480
<v Speaker 4>a classic avoidant? Who got hurt in the past and

0:27:06.530 --> 0:27:09.030
<v Speaker 4>even recently with his relationship so that now he sees

0:27:09.070 --> 0:27:09.810
<v Speaker 4>something with you.

0:27:09.990 --> 0:27:10.830
<v Speaker 2>I think you may be right.

0:27:10.850 --> 0:27:12.860
<v Speaker 1>Something big and it scared him off.

0:27:12.930 --> 0:27:14.740
<v Speaker 4>And so if he comes back to you and says,

0:27:14.760 --> 0:27:17.720
<v Speaker 4>you know, hey, I'm sorry I've been gone for so long.

0:27:17.920 --> 0:27:18.300
<v Speaker 2>I don't know.

0:27:19.000 --> 0:27:19.369
<v Speaker 3>I don't know.

0:27:20.210 --> 0:27:22.530
<v Speaker 2>I got to, I don't know. This is going to

0:27:22.550 --> 0:27:24.650
<v Speaker 2>be another podcast. I don't have the answer for.

0:27:24.570 --> 0:27:26.320
<v Speaker 1>Any of this. We don't have enough time today. And

0:27:26.359 --> 0:27:29.410
<v Speaker 1>I have really loved this episode. You know, if it

0:27:29.450 --> 0:27:31.160
<v Speaker 1>doesn't work out, the four of us can just like

0:27:31.180 --> 0:27:33.400
<v Speaker 1>be together and we can rent our own house here

0:27:33.460 --> 0:27:34.060
<v Speaker 1>in Tahoe.

0:27:34.100 --> 0:27:34.840
<v Speaker 3>You know what I mean?

0:27:34.920 --> 0:27:36.859
<v Speaker 1>And we can just be together. Let's go to that

0:27:36.900 --> 0:27:40.719
<v Speaker 1>dream place for an expectation. I think that. What we

0:27:40.780 --> 0:27:43.709
<v Speaker 1>need is another podcast and we can just continue. I mean,

0:27:44.170 --> 0:27:46.150
<v Speaker 1>Kathy and I have been on this journey together for

0:27:46.190 --> 0:27:49.040
<v Speaker 1>a time here and here we still sit available.

0:27:49.100 --> 0:27:53.670
<v Speaker 2>But you know what? I believe it can... We can

0:27:53.730 --> 0:27:54.410
<v Speaker 2>find our people.

0:27:54.670 --> 0:27:55.870
<v Speaker 1>I have not lost hope, ladies.

0:27:55.890 --> 0:27:56.869
<v Speaker 3>No, we have not lost hope.

0:27:56.950 --> 0:27:58.409
<v Speaker 1>I don't know if I am an idiot or a

0:27:58.430 --> 0:27:59.210
<v Speaker 1>hopeless romantic.

0:27:59.470 --> 0:28:02.379
<v Speaker 2>You call it. Hopeful. Hopeful romantic.

0:28:02.520 --> 0:28:05.820
<v Speaker 1>But I believe that there is someone out there. I

0:28:05.859 --> 0:28:08.840
<v Speaker 1>don't know what it is, if it just hasn't aligned

0:28:09.480 --> 0:28:12.400
<v Speaker 1>with my life just yet. But I have hope that

0:28:12.420 --> 0:28:14.460
<v Speaker 1>there is someone really great out there who's going to

0:28:14.520 --> 0:28:18.280
<v Speaker 1>show up and it's just going to click. I'm too young.

0:28:18.560 --> 0:28:21.580
<v Speaker 1>I'm pretty funny. You're pretty fabulous.

0:28:21.619 --> 0:28:21.920
<v Speaker 3>You too.

0:28:22.200 --> 0:28:23.540
<v Speaker 2>It's got to happen. Look at us.

0:28:23.880 --> 0:28:24.800
<v Speaker 1>It's got to happen.

0:28:25.000 --> 0:28:25.600
<v Speaker 2>Don't you think?

0:28:25.740 --> 0:28:26.379
<v Speaker 3>No, I don't.

0:28:26.400 --> 0:28:28.820
<v Speaker 2>That's why, oh, we're going to end on this. That's

0:28:28.840 --> 0:28:30.560
<v Speaker 2>why I'm moving to Lake Tahoe because I've heard there's

0:28:30.619 --> 0:28:37.230
<v Speaker 2>lots of great single guys here. Tonight, I'm, you know what?

0:28:37.250 --> 0:28:38.670
<v Speaker 2>We got to end this. I got to get dressed

0:28:38.690 --> 0:28:40.530
<v Speaker 2>so I can. There we go.

0:28:40.730 --> 0:28:41.370
<v Speaker 1>Oh my goodness.

0:28:41.470 --> 0:28:42.090
<v Speaker 2>Wing women.

0:28:42.510 --> 0:28:45.430
<v Speaker 1>Wing women. Wing women. We're going to marry each other off.

0:28:45.530 --> 0:28:46.750
<v Speaker 1>I'm not getting married ever again.

0:28:46.770 --> 0:28:47.350
<v Speaker 3>I'm not either.

0:28:47.790 --> 0:28:48.530
<v Speaker 1>So we'll. I would like to.

0:28:48.890 --> 0:28:49.550
<v Speaker 2>Well, you would.

0:28:49.610 --> 0:28:53.200
<v Speaker 1>I would. We've got to do it next time. I've

0:28:53.220 --> 0:28:54.860
<v Speaker 1>got to know why you would ever do it again.

0:28:54.880 --> 0:28:58.700
<v Speaker 1>All right, ladies, this has been fun. I've been Deanna.

0:28:59.200 --> 0:28:59.990
<v Speaker 2>I've been Kathy.

0:29:00.970 --> 0:29:01.690
<v Speaker 1>I've been Cindy.

0:29:02.030 --> 0:29:02.690
<v Speaker 3>I've been Annalise.