Speaker 1: Welcome to Worst Year Ever, a production of I Heart
Speaker 1: Radio Together Everything. So don't do what what's up? What's what? What? What? What?
Speaker 1: What's what's anyway? This is a podcast, which you know
Speaker 1: you you probably know this is a podcast unless you
Speaker 1: are someone who was living in an isolated hunter gatherer
Speaker 1: tribe and plane crashed over your territory and the corpse
Speaker 1: of a passenger was sucked out and landed in your
Speaker 1: in your area, and it just so happened that their
Speaker 1: phone hit a branch on the way down that had
Speaker 1: like the right the consistency or whatever was the right
Speaker 1: amount of wet that that it actually unlocked the screen
Speaker 1: and it pressed start on a podcast. And you're hearing
Speaker 1: this as your first recorded voices that that that have
Speaker 1: you've ever listened to. And if that's the case, stay
Speaker 1: away from civilization. Just just keep doing what you're doing.
Speaker 1: Do not do not, do not go past the trees. Yeah,
Speaker 1: turn around, go back. Congratulations on learning English. Yeah really
Speaker 1: you're a quick learner. Love that for you. Just stop
Speaker 1: right there. Yeah, do not Spotify is enticing, I get it,
Speaker 1: but but there's nothing. There's nothing on here that's going
Speaker 1: to make you happy. Ultimately, for the love of God's
Speaker 1: stay off of Twitter. Please stay off of Twitter. Do
Speaker 1: not open that app, um. But to everybody else, welcome
Speaker 1: back to ever podcasts that we are recording right now.
Speaker 1: My name is Cody and I've got a last name too,
Speaker 1: has everybody else doing? Johnston? The name of you I've got,
Speaker 1: I've got between two and three of them, depending on
Speaker 1: how you what you consider a name. Um, give us
Speaker 1: two to three of what you consider I don't want
Speaker 1: to know what you mean. Yeah, Um, you know everyone
Speaker 1: has three names, right, you got your middle name, you
Speaker 1: get your first name back. Not everybody has a middle
Speaker 1: name I do. Do you guys know what my middle
Speaker 1: name is? Do you even know what my real name is?
Speaker 1: My full name is Cataford Datavin and I love that
Speaker 1: Kathleen based off of my first name, Kathleen. What do
Speaker 1: you think my middle name is? Yes, he gets it, Kathleen,
Speaker 1: Jessica bille Stole. So I have four names that all
Speaker 1: belong exclusively to me. We're just really shooting the ship, um,
Speaker 1: and we've got something fun to do today. Everybody listening
Speaker 1: except for the first person that that Robert, Oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: not that person. Except for that except for that person
Speaker 1: um knows that we are reading Ben Shapiro's short stories
Speaker 1: as a fun little treat, and uh, Cody was regaling
Speaker 1: us with the first story, and we have gotten precisely
Speaker 1: halfway through, um, this work of art written in point font. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like a children's book. Not a lot of paragraphs on
Speaker 1: the page. And still yet too many paragraphs and too
Speaker 1: many Yeah really walks that line. Yeah, when we met
Speaker 1: our hero, it's not good. It's not meant to mhm.
Speaker 1: We found out on page nine that the guy's name
Speaker 1: is Tommy, right thing, we found it as a trend
Speaker 1: in Ben Shapiro. He doesn't he doesn't necessarily like you
Speaker 1: knowing who the characters are or what their relationships are
Speaker 1: to each other. He likes to keep that mystery. It's
Speaker 1: like fog of war in an RTS, but for the
Speaker 1: very basics of of plot structure. Yeah. Yeah, you gotta
Speaker 1: play a few levels before you can really see the
Speaker 1: full map. By map, i mean the character's name. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's it's it's pretty. It's bold storytelling. I'll call it.
Speaker 1: Got to send you gotta send your scouts out. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's like a mammoth tank. You don't get the mammoth
Speaker 1: tank until it's like seven or eight episodes into the campaign.
Speaker 1: You don't learn the character's first the character's name until
Speaker 1: nine pages in exactly you got you gotta work for it,
Speaker 1: and boy did we. Uh. Tommy works on a farm
Speaker 1: kind of and he thinks everything should be fair and
Speaker 1: he's learning a tough lesson about what is fair. That's
Speaker 1: the name. Oh story, story, that's fair. Um, and his
Speaker 1: brother has this way. It's a great idea on how
Speaker 1: to like make farming the wave of the future. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you need more air in your more air in the soil.
Speaker 1: Nobody thought about this until Also remember in the span
Speaker 1: of like a paragraph, Tommy fell in love with his
Speaker 1: or no, his brother fell in love with Jim. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and took her and then they're married. I really covered
Speaker 1: a lot of him. Yeah, Um, his mom sick, dad's
Speaker 1: dad lost his knife in the woods. It's really again,
Speaker 1: if you're trying to actually, if you're trying to actually, like, like,
Speaker 1: if you wanted to write a story that was good
Speaker 1: and included a care arcter who was trying to single
Speaker 1: handedly develop a new innovation to improve crop yields. Tractor
Speaker 1: doesn't really make any sense against just just does not
Speaker 1: make any any sense in a number of ways. Maybe
Speaker 1: have him go to school and learn chemistry and be
Speaker 1: like a soil scientist to develop some new like fertilizers.
Speaker 1: And I'm just saying it would be harder to poke
Speaker 1: holes than that, because you could just say, yeah, he
Speaker 1: developed an amazing new fertilizer, and you don't even need
Speaker 1: to go into that much detail. He's just like, was
Speaker 1: spending a lot of time and he developed a fertilizer
Speaker 1: and it worked great. You don't have to do this
Speaker 1: sweaty ass fucking anyway. Whatever. Sorry, it's just very frustrating
Speaker 1: that Ben Shapiro does not know the first thing about
Speaker 1: growing stuff. You do not need to apologize for anything.
Speaker 1: You are right, I validate you ever power. Yeah, tell
Speaker 1: that to the guy I hit with my car yesterday.
Speaker 1: Well I would you can't you know alive? Anyway, let's continue. Well,
Speaker 1: when last we met our heroes, and with Jim out
Speaker 1: of control, everything spun out of control, yes soon and
Speaker 1: was having to take care of the Yeah, oh it
Speaker 1: was how we concluded. It was big. It was a
Speaker 1: big the big reveal the amount of control everything spun
Speaker 1: out of control. Ben Shapiro never read his own book.
Speaker 1: He didn't read it a second time the first time.
Speaker 1: I guess I just need to I'm sure everybody's knows
Speaker 1: this already. Feels like I have to point it out again.
Speaker 1: My biggest pet peeve with his writing is how often
Speaker 1: he overuses the same word within the same sentence, or
Speaker 1: you know, within two sentences. But I'm sure that's the
Speaker 1: last instance. Soon m was having to take care of
Speaker 1: the finances, which meant that I was having to take
Speaker 1: care of mom, and I was still working in the fields. Meanwhile,
Speaker 1: Jim was obsessed with that machine. One day, it was
Speaker 1: hot as blazes outside, so hot, goddamn it, so hot
Speaker 1: that the sweat would dry on your forehead and then
Speaker 1: break out again until you felt like you didn't have
Speaker 1: any moisture at all left inside you. Has been been
Speaker 1: in the heat. That's terrible. That's a terrible description of
Speaker 1: what it's like when it's hot. He spent so many
Speaker 1: words describing how hot it is, and we don't even
Speaker 1: know if it's a dry heat or a humid heat. Well,
Speaker 1: I think are we talking like that you have any
Speaker 1: moisture at all left inside you? A desert furnace or
Speaker 1: are we talking like Texas heat where like all the
Speaker 1: moisture gets sucked out of your body instantly, and like
Speaker 1: what are you anyway? Sorry again for anything? Ever? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I was out in the fields as usual, and Jim
Speaker 1: was in the barn cool as a cucumber. Heat even brought.
Speaker 1: He had even brought a little unit air conditioner out
Speaker 1: there with him. I need to keep my head clear,
Speaker 1: he had told m He'd told all right, the heat
Speaker 1: was so soggy that the waves were coming up off
Speaker 1: the ground like gas out of an oven. There you go.
Speaker 1: He was so soggy so that the waves were coming
Speaker 1: up off the ground like gas oon oven. That's that's
Speaker 1: a fine description. I'll give it to him, Okay. But
Speaker 1: I stopped for a moment to wipe off my forehead.
Speaker 1: That's when I looked up at the house, new paragraph.
Speaker 1: It was burning. Oh dear, okay. I hollered at the
Speaker 1: top of my lungs for Jim to get in there
Speaker 1: and find out what the hell was going on. Cody.
Speaker 1: I'm like, Jim, Jim, come here as burning. There we go,
Speaker 1: uh Jim to an answer, I hollered again. Silence from
Speaker 1: the barn. My first thought was that a fuse must
Speaker 1: have busted in the house. But when I sprinted towards
Speaker 1: the house, I could see that the smoke was coming
Speaker 1: from inside the house. That's bad, from Jim's old room,
Speaker 1: Mom's room. I busted into the house. I busted into
Speaker 1: the house. I busted into the house like I was
Speaker 1: breaking through a defensive line, and rammed my way upstairs.
Speaker 1: There was Mom in the bed and her sheet was
Speaker 1: on fire. Jimmy, I hollered, am who came to help me?
Speaker 1: How was she like smoking? Because she wasn't set up
Speaker 1: as a smoker, not, not the rest of the room,
Speaker 1: just the the house was not on fire. Then well
Speaker 1: he saw smoke. That that I'm fine with. It's more
Speaker 1: like how because he didn't set her up as a smoker?
Speaker 1: Did her? There's no context here, and I'm sure he
Speaker 1: will say it. Maybe you will find out smoked like
Speaker 1: and like, Look, it's not a huge deal. But he's
Speaker 1: not using those words to describe describe. No, I mean
Speaker 1: me saying to like. I looked up and that's when
Speaker 1: I noticed the house was on fire or whatever. I
Speaker 1: called out to Jim to tell him the house was
Speaker 1: on fire. You could say there's black smoke coming from
Speaker 1: Mom's room. The house is on fire, suggests an enormous blaze,
Speaker 1: right versus theres some smoke fire anyway? You get my point?
Speaker 1: Bad bad, Yeah, apparently the house is not on fire,
Speaker 1: but rather one sheet in the in the mom's room
Speaker 1: was on fire. Or maybe well maybe maybe he will
Speaker 1: look uh Jimmy. But it was m who came to
Speaker 1: help me. She rushed in with a bucket of water
Speaker 1: and daused Mom in the bed. I grabbed an old
Speaker 1: dress and started whacking away at the fire. Pretty soon,
Speaker 1: between the two of us we'd put it out. Okay,
Speaker 1: so fires out, Well, that's good. I sat there panting
Speaker 1: for a minute. Mom was sitting there, holding a box
Speaker 1: of matches and crying. She didn't know what she was doing,
Speaker 1: and I started to get mad. I ran down the
Speaker 1: stairs and called after me, but I didn't care. I
Speaker 1: went out and rhyming, they're not really. I didn't care.
Speaker 1: It's whatever, it's what, it's whatever, it's not, it's unimportant.
Speaker 1: I went outside and headed for the barn. Sure enough,
Speaker 1: Jim was under that plow again. I stood there for
Speaker 1: a minute, then too, it's not his fault. Yeah, he
Speaker 1: doesn't does he? Could he hear you? This? Okay? I'm sorry.
Speaker 1: This guy kid sounds like he just has so much
Speaker 1: resentment for his big brother that everything he's trying to
Speaker 1: make everything in his life his brother's problem. Which problem.
Speaker 1: It's not fair that he's been written by Ben Ship
Speaker 1: you guys, Okay, okay, guys. I know what this reminds
Speaker 1: me of. Now. Um, I've been spending a lot of
Speaker 1: time on the am I Am I the Asshole Reddit yah,
Speaker 1: and this sounds like and in my the asshole thing
Speaker 1: where someone's like and can you believe this guy was
Speaker 1: out there working on his tractor and you're like, dude,
Speaker 1: what do you mean he's working? Sounds like that any who.
Speaker 1: But also I thought the house was on fire, right, Yeah? Right?
Speaker 1: I mean yea. I sit there for a minute, then two.
Speaker 1: It must have taken the bastard five solid minutes to
Speaker 1: notice me. Why didn't you like speak up? Yeah? I
Speaker 1: must have taken all right. When he did, he got
Speaker 1: out from under the plow, stood up, gave a kind
Speaker 1: of little smile and asked what was wrong? And I
Speaker 1: knocked him flat on his ass. What it's un Listen, Jim,
Speaker 1: I said to him, you've been I mean, but also
Speaker 1: I think that's the point, right, like the this, this,
Speaker 1: what's his name, Tommy, it's supposed to like he's like
Speaker 1: I thought everything supposed to be fair, and I'm and
Speaker 1: like he like he's being unreasonable. Maybe I don't know.
Speaker 1: I said to him, you've been having it sorry, I mean, yeah,
Speaker 1: you've been having it your own way all this time,
Speaker 1: but some things are gonna change. You've been king at
Speaker 1: this place for our whole life. But I've had enough
Speaker 1: of it. I want my peace. He looked at me,
Speaker 1: and I could see he really didn't understand what was
Speaker 1: going on. Here was this smart guy, and all of
Speaker 1: a sudden he was playing stupid. I started to holler again,
Speaker 1: I'm out there busting out hump to bring into bread,
Speaker 1: and you're sitting here underneath this damn machine all day long,
Speaker 1: tinkering with nothing. I could see Jim was starting to
Speaker 1: get mad. It took a lot to get Jim mad.
Speaker 1: He'd look distant behind his eyes somehow, like he was
Speaker 1: hiding behind a wall. His eyes would go kind of cold,
Speaker 1: and his fists would clench and unclenched. He stood up
Speaker 1: and stared at me. The vein in his forehead was
Speaker 1: popping out. Now me, he said, you don't do anything
Speaker 1: of importance around here. Do you think I need you
Speaker 1: to run this place? I gotta hire a field hand
Speaker 1: for one quarter of the price. I'm doing it at
Speaker 1: a charity for you. You never held down a real job.
Speaker 1: You're still going on and on about your days back
Speaker 1: in high school. Nobody cares anymore. First of all, isn't
Speaker 1: that is a real job. He is holding me down
Speaker 1: a real job. He's doing a real job right now. Well, right,
Speaker 1: if if you assume that what Ben Shapiro says about
Speaker 1: tractors is true, yes, right, like exactly, like within the
Speaker 1: world that he has created, that he's doing a job anyway,
Speaker 1: I produce. The spark in his eyes was beginning to return.
Speaker 1: I knew this meant he was especially mad. You aren't
Speaker 1: worth anything you've got, all right? First of all? Right, now, well,
Speaker 1: so that's the issue that I'm running into now. Um. Traditionally, um,
Speaker 1: when writing prose and fiction, you uh, it's a new
Speaker 1: paragraph when there's a new speaker. M. Yeah, that's what
Speaker 1: I'm bit of dialogue and then you okay, then they
Speaker 1: say their piece, and maybe that's not no. So in
Speaker 1: the same paragraph I produce, we assume that that's Tommy
Speaker 1: saying this, Um. It does not indicate that, but it's
Speaker 1: then wait a second, I'm not positive that it is.
Speaker 1: It might be Jim. Back up, back it up, back
Speaker 1: it up, back it up. So there's a Okay, so
Speaker 1: here's a paragraph Tommy, you don't do nothing, blah blah
Speaker 1: blah blah blah. I could nobody cares anymore. And there's
Speaker 1: no quotation mark at the end of that paragraph, which
Speaker 1: indicates that well, that usually indicates like, okay, new paragraph,
Speaker 1: it's a new person speaking. And then the next thing
Speaker 1: is I produce. I don't like. I don't know why
Speaker 1: he made that a new paragraph. Um, I'm presuming that's Tommy. Okay,
Speaker 1: nobody cares anymore. New paragraph I produce, So I guess
Speaker 1: that is tom it's Jim saying that. It seems like
Speaker 1: Tommy is saying a response no I produce, but Jim
Speaker 1: is actually saying it. Um. Yeah. So the Parker's eyes
Speaker 1: was beginning to return. I knew this man. He was
Speaker 1: especially mad. You aren't worth anything. You've got no education,
Speaker 1: you've got no prospects. You know what Dad told me
Speaker 1: before I left for school. He said, look after Tommy.
Speaker 1: If anything happens Jimmy, he can't take care of himself.
Speaker 1: So what do you think I've been doing? Okay, so
Speaker 1: it was yeah, Jimmy, Jimmy and Tommy, come on, Ben
Speaker 1: can help us out here. Um. I started to talk,
Speaker 1: but he gave me a look that said I'd better
Speaker 1: shut my mouth. He I thought you knocked him out
Speaker 1: or whatever. He kept going. You know, you know what
Speaker 1: I've been doing in this barn all this time, trying
Speaker 1: to make something for myself and for m sure, but
Speaker 1: mostly I've been trying to take care of you still,
Speaker 1: even though you're sullen and you're lazy, and you're ungrateful,
Speaker 1: and you think somehow I've cheated you, even though I
Speaker 1: spent years helping you with your homework, teaching you the
Speaker 1: rules of football. I've got that man from State Capital State,
Speaker 1: come see you play again. I I'm not a I'm
Speaker 1: not an expert. I'm not even good at sports. But
Speaker 1: I did play football, and I can confidently say that
Speaker 1: if been Shapiro knew anything about sports, he would have
Speaker 1: written it to be something like taught you how to throw?
Speaker 1: You know, you know, like like, like, taught you how
Speaker 1: to actually throw football is a thing no one would
Speaker 1: ever say, right, you don't need like, yeah, the technique
Speaker 1: is what you teach. Yeah, you wouldn't. You would say
Speaker 1: my brother taught me the rules the rules of football
Speaker 1: would be like, yeah, my brother taught me how to
Speaker 1: catch a pass, you know, exact. There's a number of
Speaker 1: things you could say that wouldn't sound like you were
Speaker 1: a fucking moon man. All right, So Tommy taught wait, yeah,
Speaker 1: so Tommy, Tommy taught Jimmy. Seriously, uh, Tommy, touch me
Speaker 1: teaching these rules football? Hell, I haven't got that man
Speaker 1: from state to come see you play. When this thing
Speaker 1: makes us a million bucks, I'm planning on sending you
Speaker 1: back to college so you can make something in yourself.
Speaker 1: But if you want to leave, you pick up and
Speaker 1: you get the hell out. He pointed at the door
Speaker 1: I left. When I look back, he was under that
Speaker 1: plow again. So like this is a little it's like
Speaker 1: because like I think that what's going on here is
Speaker 1: that Ben is speaking through Tommy. Yes, like Jim the
Speaker 1: main character, the narrator is the ungrateful like but like
Speaker 1: he but he works hard on the farm. Every day,
Speaker 1: Like he made that clear that that's what's going on.
Speaker 1: So like I don't know, right, like he's working hard.
Speaker 1: I think what what Ben is trying to do is
Speaker 1: have one of those story arias were like, you've got
Speaker 1: an unreliable narrator and so Jim think or been whatever
Speaker 1: whichever the Tommy I guess whoever the Jim Jimmy, Jimmy
Speaker 1: is Jimmy the viewpoint character Jim one find and replace
Speaker 1: and make one of them called fucking Dale or something.
Speaker 1: So it's a seriously right there changed one of the
Speaker 1: names doesn't matter, which, yeah, literally any of them. Um,
Speaker 1: But I think what he's trying to do is have
Speaker 1: an unreliable narrator thing where like the narrator thinks that
Speaker 1: he's keeping the farm going, but really it's his brother,
Speaker 1: and like that's supposed to be like that twist moment
Speaker 1: where suddenly like the whole perspective shifts and you're right,
Speaker 1: But he doesn't do any of the work, Like he
Speaker 1: does nothing to actually establish that if that's what he's
Speaker 1: trying to do. If that's what he's trying to do,
Speaker 1: but he neither of the characters, um, problems with each
Speaker 1: other are warranted, like does that make sense, Like you're
Speaker 1: mad at at Tommy for some reason that's not Like
Speaker 1: this is not explained and doesn't make sense, and Tommy
Speaker 1: work is accusing things, accusing Jimmy of things that Ben
Speaker 1: has not illustrated and has actually said the opposite of
Speaker 1: it's a confusing mess, and it's been did the work
Speaker 1: to set up that, like okay, they had like a
Speaker 1: competition over a woman and his brother like married the
Speaker 1: girl he was in love with, barely work, barely wait,
Speaker 1: and and we don't there's no like going back to
Speaker 1: that that's not built on as like it would be
Speaker 1: like we're not he's not doing the work to be
Speaker 1: like okay, And now we're going to show how that
Speaker 1: resentment gradually snowballs and this gets time and that it's
Speaker 1: just like, yeah, that happened. Let's move on to the
Speaker 1: next thing that I'm going to bluntly explain happening to you.
Speaker 1: And at no point do we we don't feel any
Speaker 1: kind of building resentment, you know, there's no right, there's
Speaker 1: no momentum to the anger. Yes, what Katie pointed out
Speaker 1: like last last time time, like it's a list of facts.
Speaker 1: There are feelings. It's yeah, exactly. Now you know who
Speaker 1: whose anger does have tremendous momentum and will one day
Speaker 1: burn the entire world? Uh, it might be, It might be.
Speaker 1: It could be any of the products and services that
Speaker 1: support this podcast. That's the beauty of products and services.
Speaker 1: Any one of them could end all life on human earth.
Speaker 1: Find out which find out? Yeah, break together everything and
Speaker 1: we're back, and you know what. About a week later,
Speaker 1: I heard some stir in the house in the middle
Speaker 1: of the night. I figure, I have to I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: so we're back. Uh, he could have shown that like
Speaker 1: he was like the unreliable narrator aspect, you show that
Speaker 1: he's actually not doing the work even though he claims
Speaker 1: he's not. He's he is doing the work, right, Like
Speaker 1: you have him claim that this is going on, but
Speaker 1: you sort of like show some moments of him not
Speaker 1: doing It doesn't matter anyway. About a week later, I
Speaker 1: heard something stir in the house in the middle of
Speaker 1: the night. I figured that maybe it was Mom, so
Speaker 1: I slipped on my pants and stepped into the hallway.
Speaker 1: Mom's lights out. I don't know Mom's light was out,
Speaker 1: but the light from downstairs the kitchen was on. I
Speaker 1: guess it wasn't a mouse. I could hear Jimmy snoring
Speaker 1: in the other room. It rattled the door to his room,
Speaker 1: a little powerful snore. I tiptoed downstairs. As I got
Speaker 1: closer to the kitchen, I could hear the sniff right,
Speaker 1: that sounds like sleep apnea. Oh yeah, he's got he
Speaker 1: needs another machine used to fix the air in the uh.
Speaker 1: As I got closer to the kitchen, I could hear
Speaker 1: the sniffling. I nudged open the door, and sure enough
Speaker 1: and was sitting at the table with her head in
Speaker 1: her hands. I sat down next to her and asked
Speaker 1: her what was wrong. I didn't want any of this,
Speaker 1: she said. Her snot was dripping a little, but she
Speaker 1: looked as beautiful as ever. She was wearing her robe
Speaker 1: and it was open just a little at the top.
Speaker 1: I could see her breathing. All right, any of my
Speaker 1: head on the desk? Yeah, um uh, formatting issues can
Speaker 1: to ignore uh this, she said. I wanted to leave.
Speaker 1: I didn't want to have to take care of mom,
Speaker 1: or be a farmer's wife, or watch my man start
Speaker 1: to lose his mind from being pent up in this
Speaker 1: little cage of a town. She looked so beautiful with
Speaker 1: the tears in her eyes. Oh my god, Ben, you
Speaker 1: already said that, and like whatever dripping down her face,
Speaker 1: I reached over and wiped them off with my big
Speaker 1: meaty hand. Okay, all right, Ben, Okay, he's given himself
Speaker 1: a physical description, but he gives himself meaty hand. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I have got this. Yeah, so I guess he's a
Speaker 1: big boy. I'll give it to him. I'm fairly certain.
Speaker 1: I'm fairly certain that I've heard meaty hands used before.
Speaker 1: I don't think i've ever heard a character describe their
Speaker 1: own hands as meaty'. That's something that you describe somebody
Speaker 1: else with. But also, um, if you're just gonna slip
Speaker 1: that in right now, you would think that you would
Speaker 1: have told us slipped something in earlier to suggest that
Speaker 1: you're a large person, Like that's never been as far
Speaker 1: as I can remember, spurt right, right, But what we're
Speaker 1: not like saying like I lumbered through or X yeah no, yeah,
Speaker 1: like a like a writer. Um, Also, I can't I
Speaker 1: just like you already said, she looks beautiful while crying.
Speaker 1: You don't need to say the second time. You don't
Speaker 1: need to say it the first time. But you don't
Speaker 1: need to. I really dislike I mean, yeah, it's it's
Speaker 1: it's like super trophy, just trophy, but also just a
Speaker 1: male male characters that are like ignited by women's vulnerability
Speaker 1: or like the sexualization of that, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: Where he's there, he's uh, well he's started like a
Speaker 1: savior hero role but that was open. Yeah, he's he's
Speaker 1: getting turned on by Yeah, but Ben can't actually write
Speaker 1: like people think of this as romantic, but men think
Speaker 1: that that's romantic. Men think of or like not you guys,
Speaker 1: but in general, like this accepted idea in our literature
Speaker 1: and our things of like this this trope, and I
Speaker 1: dislike it. Yeah, yeah, I mean I would. I would
Speaker 1: be more forgiving of it if he was at least
Speaker 1: like competently doing that. Like, but there's no you know,
Speaker 1: you've got two options if you're going to try to
Speaker 1: write like romance um. One of them is to be
Speaker 1: very descriptive of it um if that's the kind of
Speaker 1: thing your story is. And another is to be circumspect
Speaker 1: but clear to where like, you know, there's building tension
Speaker 1: and then you kind of have the character acknowledge and
Speaker 1: then we like we we you know, we we cheated
Speaker 1: on it or whatever. Like you you can kind of
Speaker 1: very bluntly and briefly go over what happened if you
Speaker 1: don't want to be like writing it out explicitly but
Speaker 1: been somehow like threads the needle of doing neither. Um,
Speaker 1: that's good, it's good. Yeah, we like it. Yeah, um,
Speaker 1: it's also we don't need to get into this too much.
Speaker 1: But there's like a trend I've noticed on like TikTok
Speaker 1: about about Katie, what you're talking about, and just like
Speaker 1: these like you know, guys like doing the fake crying
Speaker 1: and like these fake stories of like oh you were
Speaker 1: abused or like this, and like I'm helping you like
Speaker 1: this sort of like hero fantasy. It's really I have
Speaker 1: not seen it, but I don't want it. You don't,
Speaker 1: and now I probably will because my fucking phone is
Speaker 1: almost certainly listening. I bet within the next week I'll
Speaker 1: see some of those videos somewhere. Any who. Any who,
Speaker 1: she looked so beautiful with the tears in her eyes
Speaker 1: dripping down her face. I reached over and wiped them
Speaker 1: off with my big meaty hand. Wait is that a
Speaker 1: second one? No? No, no, I'm just catching us up
Speaker 1: just like. Uh, I wish he did it, just like
Speaker 1: literally forbade him a second time. Do you remember when
Speaker 1: I first brought you here, I asked her. Of course,
Speaker 1: that's when I first met Jimmy. I stumbled for the
Speaker 1: right words. You know, I had a crush on you.
Speaker 1: Do you remember we almost a frightened look across her face. No,
Speaker 1: she finally answered, I liked you a lot, Tommy, but
Speaker 1: never like that. That struck me hard. Sure you did,
Speaker 1: I said, if Jimmy hadn't been home, I locked you
Speaker 1: a lot, Tommy, she said again, but I lacked a
Speaker 1: lot of guys. It was different with Jimmy. I put
Speaker 1: my hand out. Oh not your big meaty hand, all right.
Speaker 1: I put my hand out and touched her arm. It
Speaker 1: didn't make any sense, but she pulled away. I hate
Speaker 1: him so much, Okay, I think he is trying to
Speaker 1: do the unreliable narrator, you know, in his head. They
Speaker 1: were right on the edge of doing things, and she
Speaker 1: was like, no, I was never interested in you. But
Speaker 1: again he's bad at it. He's doing like I didn't
Speaker 1: think that. Like this scene makes sense to me. I
Speaker 1: like reading it, like yeah, that she wasn't into you man,
Speaker 1: she liked your brother and and the end. Uh. But
Speaker 1: I put my not big or meaty hand out and
Speaker 1: touched her her wayfish thin, little dainty arm serious. No no, no,
Speaker 1: no no, it just says I put my hand out
Speaker 1: and touched her arm. Okay, that's fine. Whatever, you don't
Speaker 1: always be purple. Good for you. It didn't make any sense,
Speaker 1: but she pulled away. What it seems like it didn't
Speaker 1: make sense based on the things that she said, or
Speaker 1: it didn't make any sense, and she pulled away like
Speaker 1: her pulling away is part of the thing that doesn't
Speaker 1: make ends. So the word but doesn't work there, nippicky
Speaker 1: doesn't matter what. I got up and walked out of
Speaker 1: the house. Then I ran a new section. This is okay.
Speaker 1: I found myself in the woods. It was dark all right,
Speaker 1: but I okay, it was dark all right, but I've
Speaker 1: been in those woods many times, so I could see
Speaker 1: what about to find out he's part cat. That is
Speaker 1: not how light works like night division alright, Like like
Speaker 1: it was dark alright, but I've been in those woods
Speaker 1: many times, so I could like navigate, like I knew
Speaker 1: where I was going. Yeah, yeah, so I knew where
Speaker 1: I was going. It was I could go through. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's dark, but I know this that Yeah, the next
Speaker 1: line j K ran into tree and just kidding a
Speaker 1: fucking eight ships real bad, my, my big meaty pinky toe.
Speaker 1: It was dark, all right, but I've been in those
Speaker 1: woods many times, so I could see. I didn't know
Speaker 1: what I was looking for. Maybe I just needed to
Speaker 1: clear my head, that's obviously what is the situation. The
Speaker 1: woods had grown over since I was a kid, so
Speaker 1: you're not taking care of the woods around your farm,
Speaker 1: all right. And I stumbled on some tree roots, scraped
Speaker 1: up my arms pretty bad, cursed my own stupidity. So
Speaker 1: there's not a j K. But yeah, but yeah, literally
Speaker 1: he did fucking follow his stupid face or his arms.
Speaker 1: He scraped up his arms pretty bad, cursed his own stupidity.
Speaker 1: How could I have said that to m? Humiliated myself
Speaker 1: like that? Um, I'm sorry, center, Yeah, humiliated yourself. Okay,
Speaker 1: But more than that, you made a woman on com trible.
Speaker 1: You crossed multiple boundaries. Um, you touched her face with
Speaker 1: your big meaty hands and you and you violated her
Speaker 1: personal space. Let's you noticed her robe was open and
Speaker 1: you can see her breathing. Don't feel embarrassed, feel ashamed
Speaker 1: any who. All right, here's where it gets real salty.
Speaker 1: And how could she say that to me? She knew
Speaker 1: she was lying to me and to her side. I
Speaker 1: remembered holding her in my arms, and I remember Jimmy's
Speaker 1: smiling smart face. Smiling smart face. I think Ben is Katie,
Speaker 1: but yeah, I do too, But I think this character
Speaker 1: has a little bit of that butter and her eyes
Speaker 1: turning up to meet his. The cold water rushing through
Speaker 1: my boots brought me back to reality. What okay, oh okay,
Speaker 1: I'd walked right into the creek and my feet were soaked.
Speaker 1: I'd be slashing my way back home to I thought.
Speaker 1: Then I saw it glinting there beneath the rock. It
Speaker 1: was like the movies. A beam of moonlight was hitting
Speaker 1: it just right my hunting knife. I took it. What
Speaker 1: how many years ago? How many year doesn't seem like
Speaker 1: it would still be well? I mean, yeah, even if
Speaker 1: it's stainless, it's probably not going to be still shining.
Speaker 1: After again, he couldn't have just walked and found like
Speaker 1: in the direction of where he threw it. It doesn't
Speaker 1: seem like he ever looked for it. We never hear
Speaker 1: about him looking for it because he was one of
Speaker 1: those you know how young boys when their brother gets
Speaker 1: a watch and they get a huge knife, they're always
Speaker 1: bummed because all young boys love watches, which I had that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: is that a stupid knife? God? Um, I have to
Speaker 1: Then I saw it glinting there beneath the rock. If
Speaker 1: it was beneath the rock, then you can't see it.
Speaker 1: Then it's beneath the rock. Right, Am I reading that correctly? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't see the words. But then
Speaker 1: I saw it glinting there beneath a rock. You're right,
Speaker 1: it's not logical. I get the implication that maybe it's
Speaker 1: peeking out, but you could say peeking out the rock
Speaker 1: or like wedge to the side of the rock. I get,
Speaker 1: like rights, Like so much of Ben's writing is like
Speaker 1: they get what I mean right right, Like yeah, it's
Speaker 1: good enough, sure, sure, but like whatever, only pussies that
Speaker 1: at their work. Yeah, in agreement about that. Why would
Speaker 1: you read something a second time or a first time? Yeah?
Speaker 1: The first time anyone reads your work should be someone
Speaker 1: who's not you reading it. Would you self publish it
Speaker 1: wouldn't be surprised. So we got we got about three
Speaker 1: and a half four more pages of this, I would say, masterpiece.
Speaker 1: So we're gonna take a short break to let the
Speaker 1: people know that the whatever, the product or services that
Speaker 1: you're about to hear about, supports this story. UM and
Speaker 1: Ben's writing UM unquote. Everybody on that I don't know,
Speaker 1: that's what you must say. They love it everything. It
Speaker 1: wasn't two days before Jimmy. It wasn't two days before
Speaker 1: Jimmy came running into How long wasn't dinner time? How
Speaker 1: long was it? It was, Well, it wasn't two days.
Speaker 1: It certainly wasn't it was one or three, or four
Speaker 1: or five or six or seven or eight or nine.
Speaker 1: But it wasn't any number of days other than two. Okay,
Speaker 1: it wasn't two days before Jimmy came running into the
Speaker 1: house around dinner time. Everything had been awkward in the
Speaker 1: house between me and M or M and me, but
Speaker 1: I'm not sure Jimmy had noticed anything. Now he came
Speaker 1: rushing into the kitchen, his hands were covered in grease.
Speaker 1: It works, he whispered, it works. It's exclamation point in
Speaker 1: the next part. Um, so he whispered, and then shouted,
Speaker 1: Wait a minute. How is that it works? He whispered,
Speaker 1: it works. Yeah. Uh. He reached out and grabbed him
Speaker 1: and whirled her around like a pin wheel. Her skirt
Speaker 1: flew up a little and I looked away. Yeah, good guy, ben. Uh.
Speaker 1: He looked at me too, and his eyes were bright. Tommy,
Speaker 1: he said, I want to show you this. M looked confused,
Speaker 1: but Jimmy grabbed me by the arm. Come on, kid,
Speaker 1: this is our fortune. Why is 'm confused? She knows
Speaker 1: she's been He's been working on this thing for a
Speaker 1: long time. Uh. He led me to the barn. He
Speaker 1: stood next to the machine. Now, Tommy, I want you
Speaker 1: to look really closely watch what I do. We're gonna
Speaker 1: have to sell these up and down the country, and
Speaker 1: I'm gonna need your help. You can be my sales deputy.
Speaker 1: People like you and around here remember when you were
Speaker 1: scoring touchdowns? Oh, people like you. People like you and
Speaker 1: people around here, remember when you were scoring touchdowns. He
Speaker 1: leaned over and pushed a red button. You hit this button,
Speaker 1: he said, and that gets the motor going. Now look underneath.
Speaker 1: I squatted and I saw a whole new fangled blade
Speaker 1: system underneath the plow. It was jumping and shaking in
Speaker 1: a queer way. What the fuck? Then, okay you can
Speaker 1: just say, odd man, Uh, that aerates the soil better,
Speaker 1: Like yeah, I mean everything with this tractor is nonsense.
Speaker 1: But whatever that areates the soil better. You don't have
Speaker 1: to know how it works. You just have to know
Speaker 1: that it does. That's convenient. He popped over to do
Speaker 1: not know how it works? Well, you don't need to know,
Speaker 1: so yeah, yeah, I don't think about it. Um, ignore it,
Speaker 1: close your eyes. Uh, just go to sleep. Just got asleep.
Speaker 1: He hopped over to me like a jack rabbit and
Speaker 1: grabbed me by the arms. Keeps doing that, kiddo. We're
Speaker 1: all set from here to the flood. You're a junior
Speaker 1: Floods Capitalized, you're a junior partner in the firm, and
Speaker 1: we're headed right to the top. His smile was infectious.
Speaker 1: I could feel myself smiling too. And then the knife
Speaker 1: was up under his ribs. He looked so confused. For
Speaker 1: a minute. I was a minute I was confused too.
Speaker 1: Then the blood started to gurgle from his mouth and
Speaker 1: I pushed him back, and the machine was still bucking
Speaker 1: and shaking, and his legs went out from under him,
Speaker 1: and before he could say or do anything, my foot
Speaker 1: came out from under me and kicked him in the ribs,
Speaker 1: and he grunted, and he rolled under that machine he loved,
Speaker 1: and the ground was covered with his blood. That was
Speaker 1: one sentence. By the way, Wow, he was a reliable narrator,
Speaker 1: so he didn't he he throws, he stabs his brother,
Speaker 1: and his brother gets eaten by the tractor. He rolled
Speaker 1: onto that machine. Everything else it's not as incompetent as
Speaker 1: other passages in the story of Ben. It's not good,
Speaker 1: no good. A lot of commas, but a lot a
Speaker 1: lot of commas. What are you gonna do? Uh? Spans
Speaker 1: two pages. He didn't say anything, He didn't scream, but
Speaker 1: m did when I came in the house covered with
Speaker 1: his blood new section. After the funeral, the police came
Speaker 1: to see me, but there was nothing to say about it.
Speaker 1: He'd been mashed up by that machine, so there was
Speaker 1: no evidence. They just said it was tough for me.
Speaker 1: There was no evidence. Okay, no, nothing to be done.
Speaker 1: It's good. It's the classic accident. Yeah, classic, like eaten
Speaker 1: by your own tractor that you were building. Accident happens
Speaker 1: to the worst of us Man in the Moon. Uh,
Speaker 1: that was a reference to the R. E. M Song
Speaker 1: about what's his name? The guy the comedian? Right? Um,
Speaker 1: uh it's a Wasn't there like a tractor accident in
Speaker 1: the movie called the Man in the Moon? Then? Yeah?
Speaker 1: But was the man from the nineties about and man?
Speaker 1: Uh no, no, no, they're different things. Where you are
Speaker 1: referring to the Andy Kaufman uh song by R. E. M. Yes, yes,
Speaker 1: do you believe? Yeah, yeah, you are correct my references.
Speaker 1: Nobody listening will know what I'm referring to. And I
Speaker 1: don't even prove you wrong. It actually happens. Um, yeah,
Speaker 1: proved me wrong. So um. The point is there was
Speaker 1: no evidence. Uh. They just said it was tough for
Speaker 1: me to go through this now that I was responsible
Speaker 1: for Mom and M and asked what I would do,
Speaker 1: and I told them that it was okay. I had
Speaker 1: a way to take care of things all right. That afternoon,
Speaker 1: I drove over to the big agricultural machinery store to
Speaker 1: see the boss, Mr. Ebson. I told him about our
Speaker 1: new specially aerating mechanical plow and showed him some of
Speaker 1: Jimmy's papers from his desk. His eyes lit up. He
Speaker 1: asked if he could come out and see it. I
Speaker 1: told him I'd give him a ride. When we got
Speaker 1: to the barn, I didn't even hesitate. I murdered him right. Uh.
Speaker 1: It was quiet in there, which I wasn't used to.
Speaker 1: But I knew that my fortune was lying inside, and
Speaker 1: I knew that all I needed to do was to
Speaker 1: hit the little red button. Now watch, if you please, sir,
Speaker 1: Mr Ebson, I said, in my best fancy voice, you
Speaker 1: are about to see the machine that will revolutionize American agriculture.
Speaker 1: And I hit the button. So he got it back
Speaker 1: like the cops presumably they took it away when he
Speaker 1: tore his brother apart, right, Like I mentioned that, that
Speaker 1: would be just like they left it there, just left it.
Speaker 1: There's no evidence, cleaned the blood off. Yeah, and then
Speaker 1: right for the uh huh, Like, isn't he like a
Speaker 1: guy Like yeah, we need the sucking cops because they
Speaker 1: like self murders and stuff. But like they just like, well,
Speaker 1: we're not gonna take your blood machine filled with your
Speaker 1: brother's body, you know, Well, we'll leave that with you
Speaker 1: to clean up. It seems like you've got a good
Speaker 1: handle on it by now. Good luck very funny. Care
Speaker 1: nice farm you got here? Ah, So he hit the
Speaker 1: button and nothing happened. I could feel the sweat start
Speaker 1: up under my collar. Probably should have tested this out
Speaker 1: before you brought him over. Never done it before. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's the first time his brother died in the funeral, Like,
Speaker 1: he's going around pitching this device and he never once
Speaker 1: thinks I should figure out how to work it before
Speaker 1: some one's interested. Just not a test run, I'm okaying ahead. Yeah,
Speaker 1: well you know he's not a he's not a smart man.
Speaker 1: I got down on my hands and knees and I
Speaker 1: crawled underneath the machine that had killed my brother. You
Speaker 1: killed your brother that Uh it was still rust colored
Speaker 1: from his blood. I hadn't cleaned it off yet. What
Speaker 1: he left the blood on there to show it to
Speaker 1: a guy? He man? So you you're trying to sell
Speaker 1: this product to like presumably some significant like investor corporation
Speaker 1: or whatever, and you don't even clean your brother's corpse
Speaker 1: off of it, Like are there like bits of him
Speaker 1: still there or is it just his blood? Like? Good God,
Speaker 1: keep going, keep going. I don't know what Jimmy had
Speaker 1: done under there, but it didn't look like any normal plow.
Speaker 1: It was totally changed. So I hit it a couple
Speaker 1: of times with a wrench, then got out and smiled.
Speaker 1: Let me I again, Mr Ebson, I said, I hit
Speaker 1: the button again, and again nothing happened. Mr Ebson looked
Speaker 1: at me and shrugged. Well, he said, when you get
Speaker 1: it working again, come and let me know. I think
Speaker 1: we can do business together. How do you know that?
Speaker 1: How do you know that? He just showed you a
Speaker 1: broken tractor he described a miracle machine and it didn't work.
Speaker 1: And you're like, I can't wait to see it. You're
Speaker 1: very excited for us to work together. I respect the
Speaker 1: way you didn't clean your brother's shattered corpse off of
Speaker 1: it before showing it to be all right. He walked
Speaker 1: towards the door after saying that they're going to be
Speaker 1: in business together, and sorry about your brother. He was
Speaker 1: a genius with those things. How do you know he
Speaker 1: never made one? His first one killed him. We have
Speaker 1: no we are He never explains that he's actually made
Speaker 1: them like it doesn't. He doesn't establish that his brother's
Speaker 1: operating like a tractor repair of business or something which
Speaker 1: might make sense. And again, if Ben was a good writer,
Speaker 1: he would be like breaking the DRM on a bunch
Speaker 1: of John Deere tractors, and that would lead him to
Speaker 1: a breakthrough that led him to make a better tractor,
Speaker 1: and like everyone would know he was attractor genius, so
Speaker 1: they'd be excited to anyway about this genius tractor man
Speaker 1: is that he built one that doesn't work that killed him.
Speaker 1: That's literally all that's the genius. Uh. Then he was gone.
Speaker 1: I walked back to the house. It was empty except
Speaker 1: for Mom and was gone to too. What. Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: a weird way to phrase that. It was empty except
Speaker 1: for Mom and was gone too. In addition to who,
Speaker 1: I guess the guy that left Tommy, I guess Jimmy
Speaker 1: or whatever, the guy that was just there that left,
Speaker 1: I don't know. That's stupid. They didn't go to the
Speaker 1: house and was gone too. I guess. Uh, like it
Speaker 1: would have been so much more powerful, even like powerful
Speaker 1: really putting hard quotes around that, but like it was
Speaker 1: empty except for Mom. M was gone. That's it period anyway.
Speaker 1: And I'll tell you right now, it wasn't fair. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we're here here, we are none of it. I just
Speaker 1: didn't have the breaks Jimmy had. I wasn't born smart
Speaker 1: like him. I didn't get the education. I didn't get
Speaker 1: the luck or the girl. So now I'm sitting here
Speaker 1: messing with this damn contraption and I've got Jimmy's rusty
Speaker 1: blood on my hands, and Mom's in the house waiting
Speaker 1: for me, and the house is awful quiet. That's the
Speaker 1: end of it. Oh God, Like what a sort of
Speaker 1: embarrassing Like look into what he thinks about, like what
Speaker 1: people think about fairness and like what yes, like anybody
Speaker 1: who thinks like he was, like evokes the idea of
Speaker 1: something being fair to be like this like spiteful murderer
Speaker 1: or something. What it like? I mean, it's like a
Speaker 1: commentary of like how people are like that, lazy people
Speaker 1: are like so and so who doesn't want to work
Speaker 1: or you know, like yeah, but like he did work
Speaker 1: and he didn't work right, Like nothing makes sense, nothing
Speaker 1: is justified, like this is anyway, It's a really bad story,
Speaker 1: really bad as a parable, it's bad. Um. I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: everybody listening. I You're welcome everyone listening. And Mary, Merry Christmas.
Speaker 1: Something our Christmas episode but it's probably not. But if
Speaker 1: it is, there's your present. This really good story about
Speaker 1: a fucking murderer, um for no reason, who found a
Speaker 1: saw who like saw through a rock for his knife
Speaker 1: that he never looked for and his genius brother with
Speaker 1: his tractor that killed him. And I fair with you
Speaker 1: guys reading terrible, it's so bad, but this was fun.
Speaker 1: I'd also like, so like, we're we'll be back, We'll
Speaker 1: be back with more. Um uh here's uh something I
Speaker 1: think is just funny about this book. Um it's called
Speaker 1: What's Fair? Colon and Other short Stories? Um, and I
Speaker 1: think a much better title would be What's Fair? Colon
Speaker 1: and two Other short Stories? There are only two others left,
Speaker 1: one third of the short stories in this book, which
Speaker 1: only has three stories, three short stories, one of it
Speaker 1: which is titled What's Fair. It's fair? So weird to
Speaker 1: release a book that's just three of your short stories? Yeah,
Speaker 1: it is right, you know what, keep going edit these,
Speaker 1: edit these all you're thinking of the other ones? Right? Five?
Speaker 1: Five would be fine? Yeah. Also think about maybe what
Speaker 1: what you're saying, Like, what are you saying in this
Speaker 1: first book because the story because it's it's not people,
Speaker 1: And then ask yourself if you are actually saying I'm
Speaker 1: sure the message is supposed to be that, Like, different
Speaker 1: people have natural talents that make them better than others,
Speaker 1: and so if you're not as good as someone else,
Speaker 1: you should just let them run your life and take
Speaker 1: care of you and be grateful. Like I think that's
Speaker 1: the message that he should have just been happy that
Speaker 1: his brother was better than him and let him run things. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I didn't have the I didn't have a break Jimmy had.
Speaker 1: I wasn't born smart like him. I didn't get the education.
Speaker 1: I didn't get the luck or the girl. He's feeling
Speaker 1: resentful and he shouldn't. He should be grateful, and yeah,
Speaker 1: let Jimmy run Tommy's life. Do I get those names right?
Speaker 1: Doesn't matter? Um. The closest thing to a message I
Speaker 1: can determine is like, yeah, don't don't be mad that
Speaker 1: other people have more than you. Otherwise you'll murder them
Speaker 1: and you you won't be able to get the tractor working.
Speaker 1: I guess I don't. There's not a message, is what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. It's not clear. Whatever is not clear. If you,
Speaker 1: if you really want to be a writer, maybe think
Speaker 1: what am I do I have anything that I want
Speaker 1: to say? Am I just kind of crudely redoing the
Speaker 1: Tale of Cain and Enable, but without like any actual
Speaker 1: message at all. Ask yourself if this is something you
Speaker 1: even want to do, you know, because it seems like
Speaker 1: maybe you don't rush through it really fast. You know,
Speaker 1: you blaze through the parts where you might have fun,
Speaker 1: developing some richness and some depth, but you don't. And
Speaker 1: I'm not trying to make you feel bad, but I
Speaker 1: think that maybe this just isn't something you enjoy, right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: Like sit with this, like sit with your characters, like
Speaker 1: let scenes breathe, like get in depth, like all the
Speaker 1: all the off the cuff examples and suggestions we've made
Speaker 1: through these two episodes or other ones that you might
Speaker 1: have while reading your story second time. My primary feedback
Speaker 1: would be, right, a short story, m hmm, yeah, if
Speaker 1: you if you do think that, like there's a if
Speaker 1: you want the version of this that's actually a story
Speaker 1: with characters. Um, I don't know, uh read the Bible.
Speaker 1: I was gonna say, like it literally is like he's
Speaker 1: just trying to do that, but really bad job. Also
Speaker 1: just one big am I the asshole thread? Yeah An
Speaker 1: killed my brother with a and then responding like didn't
Speaker 1: you hear? Like in the comments to people like, sorry, dude,
Speaker 1: you're the asshole. Like, right, I tell you that she
Speaker 1: touched me. It's good. Oh yeah, So Tommy, who's listening
Speaker 1: to this? Um, Tommy, meet a second woman? Yeah, likewhere
Speaker 1: there are other there's there's a second woman out there
Speaker 1: that you could meet and maybe she'll like you and
Speaker 1: you won't necessarily find her like so beautiful because she
Speaker 1: is crying and needs your comfort. Maybe not, maybe not,
Speaker 1: who knows. Um. Also, I can't I can't stop thinking
Speaker 1: about how the house is on fire. But really it's
Speaker 1: just a sheet in a room. Yeah, we never got
Speaker 1: an explanation for that kind of We don't know why
Speaker 1: that was on she was just playing with matches the
Speaker 1: mom the mom fire. We don't need no while the
Speaker 1: let that mother burn. That feels like a good place
Speaker 1: to wrap up. We gotta record our whole other book. Boys,
Speaker 1: time quick, a little short story. Ben likes to call
Speaker 1: from the pit, which I'm just gonna say is where
Speaker 1: we've already been. Yeah, this feels this feels like we've
Speaker 1: been drifting pit word for a while, But we'll be
Speaker 1: back until then, go with Christ and indeed use his
Speaker 1: connections to get some real quality blow because he Jesus
Speaker 1: always knows if anything has been cut with fentel. That's
Speaker 1: that's in the Bible, that's in the Bible, makes water
Speaker 1: out of wine, and he knows if somebody's been cutting
Speaker 1: your blow with fentnel. All right, but still Worst Year
Speaker 1: Ever is a production of I Heart Radio. For more
Speaker 1: podcasts from my heart Radio, visit the i heart Radio app,
Speaker 1: Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.