WEBVTT - Live (Virtually) on National Couples Day! 0:00:00.480 --> 0:00:04.640 Hell I Suck It Dating with me youngler Jared Haven 0:00:04.920 --> 0:00:11.160 and I heard radio podcast. We did it, Jared, we 0:00:11.240 --> 0:00:15.840 are here very first ever live podcast right now. How 0:00:15.880 --> 0:00:24.400 incredible is this? Unbelievable? Live from my bedroom and live 0:00:25.079 --> 0:00:27.760 and live from my van right now. I'm gonna go 0:00:27.760 --> 0:00:29.480 ahead and say, right now, this is the first time 0:00:29.480 --> 0:00:33.120 I've been nervous recording a podcast, probably since the fifth 0:00:33.200 --> 0:00:36.120 episode of Help I Suck It Dating. I'm recording live 0:00:36.159 --> 0:00:41.199 from my van. I am currently uh stealing some hotels Internet. 0:00:41.240 --> 0:00:43.279 Please hopefully they don't knock up my van window at 0:00:43.280 --> 0:00:45.279 some point kicking out of the parking lot, because if 0:00:45.280 --> 0:00:47.400 they do, Jared, you might have to host the rest 0:00:47.440 --> 0:00:50.000 of this episode by yourself. But here we are Help 0:00:50.000 --> 0:00:53.320 I Suck It Dating virtual live event. And they said 0:00:53.320 --> 0:00:56.560 it couldn't be done, but we're making it happen. Oh. 0:00:56.720 --> 0:00:59.000 They told us we weren't allowed to have a live 0:00:59.080 --> 0:01:01.560 event in person, and so they waited until a pandemic 0:01:01.640 --> 0:01:04.120 for us to have a virtual one. And yet here 0:01:04.120 --> 0:01:05.880 we are. Help I second data. I mean, we've been 0:01:05.880 --> 0:01:08.160 doing this podcast for what two years now, and this 0:01:08.240 --> 0:01:11.039 is our first live event. Thank you for everybody who 0:01:11.240 --> 0:01:16.840 is virtually joining us for our first ever live podcast. 0:01:17.000 --> 0:01:20.080 I can't agree more with Dean. I'm very nervous that 0:01:20.160 --> 0:01:23.560 we're just gonna screw this whole thing up, whether it's 0:01:23.560 --> 0:01:26.400 be a technical issue or we just say something that 0:01:26.480 --> 0:01:31.959 you know, gets us canceled. Uh uh. Now, it's gonna 0:01:31.959 --> 0:01:33.760 be great. It's gonna be awesome. It's gonna be super fun. 0:01:33.800 --> 0:01:36.400 We have some great guests, obviously, Mike Johnson, Evan Bass, 0:01:36.400 --> 0:01:38.920 and Taylor Nolan. We also have a dating expert coming 0:01:38.920 --> 0:01:41.120 on later on the podcast. You guys can please ask 0:01:41.200 --> 0:01:43.839 us questions. I think that will be towards the later 0:01:43.920 --> 0:01:46.480 part of the podcast usually when we do emails instead, 0:01:46.520 --> 0:01:48.560 we're gonna answer your guys questions. It's gonna be a 0:01:48.600 --> 0:01:52.320 grand old time. I don't know how that phrase came 0:01:52.360 --> 0:01:54.400 to be, but I use it all the time. But Dean, 0:01:54.720 --> 0:01:59.320 how are you doing right now? Where are you? Um? Jared, 0:01:59.480 --> 0:02:02.640 what's up? Man? And I'm doing well. I currently am 0:02:02.760 --> 0:02:05.160 uh somewhere near the south rim of the Grand Canyon. 0:02:05.240 --> 0:02:06.800 Kalen and I drove out here for a couple of 0:02:06.880 --> 0:02:10.280 days and it's, honestly kind of it's shocking how hard 0:02:10.360 --> 0:02:13.640 it is to find WiFi to steal around the Grand 0:02:13.639 --> 0:02:17.679 Canyon area. UM, I probably should have postponed this trip 0:02:17.720 --> 0:02:19.919 a couple of days and done it from Galen's apartment, 0:02:19.960 --> 0:02:21.600 But you know what, that's too easy. That's not how 0:02:21.600 --> 0:02:24.880 we operate over here. So that's where I'm at. We 0:02:24.919 --> 0:02:28.000 already have a couple of people that are in the 0:02:28.080 --> 0:02:30.440 chat room, so we want to say hi to Martina, 0:02:30.600 --> 0:02:33.680 j and Becky. Thank you guys for being our only 0:02:33.760 --> 0:02:37.560 three listeners and fans that are in the chat right now. 0:02:37.639 --> 0:02:40.280 The lies that you as well. UM, I honestly, I 0:02:40.320 --> 0:02:41.799 don't think we can see how many people are listening 0:02:41.840 --> 0:02:43.440 to this love, so I'm just gonna go ahead and 0:02:43.560 --> 0:02:47.240 assume it's three million people. We have three million viewers 0:02:47.320 --> 0:02:50.000 right now, and we're not gonna want to I'm just 0:02:50.000 --> 0:02:53.160 gonna go with like roughly seven thousand. But I like 0:02:53.240 --> 0:02:56.760 that you're in the seven. Yes, I don't know. For 0:02:56.919 --> 0:02:59.520 the listeners that are listening to this, we're watching this podcast. 0:02:59.520 --> 0:03:01.520 It's we're to sa watching this podcast because we always 0:03:01.520 --> 0:03:04.240 have to say listening. I hope you can recall the 0:03:04.240 --> 0:03:06.400 moment on Bachelor in Paradise this past season when I 0:03:06.440 --> 0:03:09.880 was talking to Calein and I said, under promise over deliver, 0:03:10.120 --> 0:03:12.160 and that's exactly what we're gonna do here. We're gonna 0:03:12.240 --> 0:03:14.320 under promise. It's not gonna be a great podcast, but 0:03:14.360 --> 0:03:17.560 we're gonna over deliver and hopefully rock your freaking world. 0:03:18.080 --> 0:03:24.120 So we've been for two years. Yeah, yeah, well with 0:03:24.240 --> 0:03:27.960 some with some open room for debate there. Um, but yeah, Jared, 0:03:28.080 --> 0:03:29.799 you knowailed on the head man. It's like every time 0:03:29.800 --> 0:03:32.440 we record a podcast usually doesn't happen, but there are 0:03:32.480 --> 0:03:34.640 times where we're like, hey, could you like take that 0:03:34.720 --> 0:03:36.840 little snippet of me saying that stupid thing out of it? 0:03:36.880 --> 0:03:38.760 And they're like, yeah, sure, no thing, no problem at all. 0:03:38.760 --> 0:03:41.600 But now, uh, whatever we say has to we just 0:03:41.640 --> 0:03:44.400 have to build as consequences of it will be held 0:03:44.400 --> 0:03:48.000 against us in the court of law. Um. Yeah, this 0:03:48.080 --> 0:03:50.920 is also like everybody watching this podcast, this is a 0:03:50.960 --> 0:03:54.040 good example of like the two people that you guys 0:03:54.040 --> 0:03:55.920 listen to on a weekly basis, Dean, what are you 0:03:56.000 --> 0:04:01.160 drinking right now? I found this local brewery here near 0:04:01.200 --> 0:04:03.440 the Grand Cannon's called Tower Station. It's a nice I 0:04:03.600 --> 0:04:07.640 p a uh oh, you got lunch earlier today, and 0:04:07.680 --> 0:04:09.480 I made sure to put one of those in our 0:04:09.560 --> 0:04:11.480 in the bridge so that way, I have a nice 0:04:12.480 --> 0:04:14.400 beer in the ani while we recorded this this podcast. 0:04:14.440 --> 0:04:16.200 Normally don't drink when I record a podcast, but I 0:04:16.240 --> 0:04:19.560 figured special circumstances. We got a live podcasts late in 0:04:19.560 --> 0:04:23.440 the afternoon. It calls for at least a beer to celebrate. Yeah, 0:04:23.680 --> 0:04:27.000 oh things. I couldn't agree more. You gotta celebrate, gotta 0:04:27.040 --> 0:04:29.479 have a beer. But it's funny because you're the cool guy. 0:04:29.520 --> 0:04:32.400 You're in the van. You know you've got swag or 0:04:32.480 --> 0:04:34.440 swab whatever you want to say. You made fun of 0:04:34.440 --> 0:04:37.120 me for saying swag at one point, but you're drinking 0:04:37.120 --> 0:04:38.680 a beer in I p A. And then here I 0:04:38.720 --> 0:04:42.960 am in my bedroom next to a Leon DiCaprio below. 0:04:44.320 --> 0:04:48.640 First of all, so it says sweet dreams, Crystal love Leo. Crystal, 0:04:49.240 --> 0:04:51.640 I'm in her bedroom actually is the one that signed 0:04:51.640 --> 0:04:55.240 me up for the bachelorette. So really I have heard 0:04:55.279 --> 0:04:58.000 a thank for finding my wife. And as you can see, 0:04:58.279 --> 0:05:00.599 instead of an I p A, I have a bubbly 0:05:01.320 --> 0:05:04.440 BlackBerry sparkling water. That's the type of guy you guys 0:05:04.680 --> 0:05:06.919 do on a weekly basis, and I thank you for 0:05:06.960 --> 0:05:09.600 doing that. Not not only does she have the sweet 0:05:09.680 --> 0:05:13.640 dreams uh by from Leo pillow. She also just has 0:05:13.680 --> 0:05:16.960 like a small little Leo pillow with Leo's face, Uh, 0:05:17.160 --> 0:05:20.800 just plastered all over this thing, which apparently gives you 0:05:20.839 --> 0:05:25.440 the sweetest of dreams. Before Jared, before before we get 0:05:25.480 --> 0:05:27.800 to our first guest, I said, one quick question, Crystal, 0:05:28.000 --> 0:05:32.280 is your sister correct? H. No, She's pretty much like 0:05:32.440 --> 0:05:35.919 my sister. My dad always says she's the adopted daughter 0:05:36.040 --> 0:05:38.600 that he never asked for, but it is very grateful 0:05:38.720 --> 0:05:41.839 that is in our life. So she she was really 0:05:41.839 --> 0:05:44.920 close with my sister, my sister Shannon, they were really close, 0:05:45.000 --> 0:05:47.679 and then I became really close with Like, we became 0:05:47.760 --> 0:05:50.919 really close altogether. Uh, and then it was just like she's, 0:05:51.160 --> 0:05:53.919 you know, like my sister pretty much. And then uh, 0:05:53.960 --> 0:05:55.800 of course, like one day she signed me up for 0:05:55.800 --> 0:05:58.159 the bachelorette. Always said I should do it, never did 0:05:58.640 --> 0:06:02.400 she signed me up. And basally, here I am hosting 0:06:02.400 --> 0:06:06.400 a podcast with you, my fine fellow, and you want 0:06:06.400 --> 0:06:09.440 to know what more about this podcast is coming up 0:06:09.480 --> 0:06:12.520 In just a couple of seconds, we have an incredible guest. 0:06:12.680 --> 0:06:14.320 Jared tell us about our very first guest we have 0:06:14.320 --> 0:06:18.440 on our very first live podcast. Well, our our very 0:06:18.480 --> 0:06:20.600 first guest I mean, you guys know him. Of course, 0:06:20.720 --> 0:06:23.479 he doesn't really need an intro now. He just wrote 0:06:23.480 --> 0:06:25.599 a book. It is available for preorder today. It is 0:06:25.640 --> 0:06:28.800 called Making the Love You Want. You know him from 0:06:28.839 --> 0:06:31.320 Hannah Brown season of The Bachelor Aurette, and then of 0:06:31.320 --> 0:06:34.040 course he went on to Bachelor in Paradise where he 0:06:34.080 --> 0:06:38.160 had a fling with Sydney. Uh. It's Mike Johnson, ladies 0:06:38.200 --> 0:06:40.320 and gentlemen. Mike Johnson is our first guest on our 0:06:40.320 --> 0:06:43.920 first ever live Help by Second Dating podcast. I think 0:06:43.920 --> 0:06:47.080 we're gonna bring him up right now with a little 0:06:47.160 --> 0:06:53.000 intro video. Yeah, I like the inter video idea. Look 0:06:53.040 --> 0:07:02.640 at that A beautiful, a beautiful beating smile from Mike 0:07:02.720 --> 0:07:06.480 Johnson over there. What's up, buddy? How are you? What's up? Bro? 0:07:06.560 --> 0:07:13.800 How y'all? How y'all doing? Living the dream? I'm telling you, Mike, 0:07:13.840 --> 0:07:15.880 it's so funny. So you're I was. I was looking 0:07:15.880 --> 0:07:18.280 you up a little bit beforehand, and I didn't know 0:07:18.320 --> 0:07:23.200 that your website is Mike johnson smile dot com. That 0:07:23.400 --> 0:07:26.840 is awes yea the dude, Because you know, Mike Johnson, 0:07:26.840 --> 0:07:28.760 my mom gave me like the most generic name in 0:07:28.760 --> 0:07:32.760 the world, so Mike Johnson domain was already taken. I 0:07:32.840 --> 0:07:35.600 offered to do five for the domain name, offered him 0:07:35.600 --> 0:07:38.960 a thousand for a domain name, and he's still said no. 0:07:39.080 --> 0:07:41.040 So I was like, I'm just gonna go with my 0:07:41.120 --> 0:07:47.040 smile and Mike Johnson smile dot com is where it's at. Also, 0:07:47.120 --> 0:07:48.840 tell us about this book that you just wrote, because 0:07:49.000 --> 0:07:52.600 I'm curious to hear more about it. Yeah, making the 0:07:52.680 --> 0:07:56.200 love you one man, it's all about I just posted 0:07:56.240 --> 0:08:00.080 today on my eyeesee some personal stuff about things that 0:08:01.320 --> 0:08:03.120 we go through in our lives that we kind of 0:08:03.160 --> 0:08:05.520 don't want to tell people that may bog us down 0:08:05.600 --> 0:08:08.760 or something of that nature. But I wanted to write 0:08:08.760 --> 0:08:12.640 in this book how to alleviate yourself from any stress 0:08:12.720 --> 0:08:15.640 that you may go through, anything that comes upon you, 0:08:16.040 --> 0:08:18.440 um and learn how to like have that boss ass 0:08:18.440 --> 0:08:20.560 attitude that you demed I know for a fact half 0:08:20.600 --> 0:08:22.760 as well, because I remember seeing you on Paradise and 0:08:22.880 --> 0:08:25.720 I was like, that dude has it, like he literally 0:08:25.760 --> 0:08:28.560 has it right. How to get that personality, how to 0:08:28.600 --> 0:08:30.920 get that smile at you have, Jared, how to just 0:08:31.000 --> 0:08:37.319 boss up in in every regarding your smile is way 0:08:37.360 --> 0:08:40.760 better than mad, my friend. It makes sense for you 0:08:40.840 --> 0:08:43.000 to write that book because as complimentary you are a 0:08:43.000 --> 0:08:45.800 book there and not you definitely possess that same quality 0:08:46.080 --> 0:08:47.960 that you want other people to have as well. So 0:08:48.000 --> 0:08:50.560 I can definitely see it's kind of like, uh, you're 0:08:50.600 --> 0:08:53.320 you're you're telling people how to do the thing that 0:08:53.360 --> 0:08:55.880 you're obviously capable of doing yourself, which is definitely a 0:08:55.880 --> 0:09:00.439 good way to le get into it. I mean, yeah, 0:09:00.600 --> 0:09:02.840 I had to also go through the things that are 0:09:02.880 --> 0:09:04.480 in my book in order to write the book, right. 0:09:04.480 --> 0:09:06.280 That's the only way that I have been able to 0:09:06.280 --> 0:09:08.440 write the mantras and the exercise because I created them 0:09:08.440 --> 0:09:11.120 when I went through it. Um, from dealing with personal 0:09:11.160 --> 0:09:14.880 trauma of like sexual harassment, sexual assault, uh, to dealing 0:09:14.960 --> 0:09:17.319 with things like being doing it legal things where I 0:09:17.320 --> 0:09:20.520 could be in prison right now, um. And the rest 0:09:20.520 --> 0:09:23.000 of that stuff will be in a book on how 0:09:23.040 --> 0:09:25.160 to turn your life around, how to be a not 0:09:25.280 --> 0:09:27.960 a product of your society, and how to create the 0:09:28.000 --> 0:09:31.080 love that you want. They're always keeping it real, You 0:09:31.160 --> 0:09:34.240 always a thousand percent and say what's on your mind. 0:09:34.640 --> 0:09:37.520 And that's a very admirable trait, especially in today's day 0:09:37.520 --> 0:09:40.280 and age, especially in someone that's put in the position 0:09:40.280 --> 0:09:42.200 that that you and me and Jared are I'll put 0:09:42.240 --> 0:09:44.480 into where it's like you want to say the right thing, 0:09:44.520 --> 0:09:45.679 you want to do the right thing to make the 0:09:45.720 --> 0:09:48.800 most amount of people happy, but in reality it's not 0:09:48.840 --> 0:09:50.640 ne Stuary tue to yourself. So what you're doing is 0:09:50.640 --> 0:09:52.959 actually you're speaking your truth all the time, which is 0:09:53.080 --> 0:10:00.280 very very admirable. Facts. I appreciate that definitely. So you man, 0:10:00.320 --> 0:10:03.240 you said on your Instagram that you you're finding vulnerability 0:10:03.280 --> 0:10:06.000 to be sexy. Now, so like my question for you 0:10:06.559 --> 0:10:12.280 is what does Mike Johnson look for in a female bro? 0:10:12.400 --> 0:10:20.160 I suck you dating? Man, Like, come on, comes from 0:10:20.200 --> 0:10:22.240 the guy that's been a relationship for over a year now, 0:10:22.320 --> 0:10:26.080 the guy that's very I am not help me out. 0:10:27.120 --> 0:10:29.600 Here's the thing about sucking at dating, and we all 0:10:29.679 --> 0:10:32.679 suck at dating, like they're all aspects of relationships and 0:10:32.760 --> 0:10:35.040 dating that we suck at. And my wife, who apparently 0:10:35.160 --> 0:10:38.680 is joining us on this podcast, can certainly attest to you, well, 0:10:38.720 --> 0:10:40.880 we got Mike on the on the podcast. You make 0:10:40.880 --> 0:10:44.280 a cameo later by okay, bute bye. You could definitely 0:10:44.280 --> 0:10:46.880 tell you that there are many things that I suck 0:10:46.960 --> 0:10:50.640 at at dating. Uh So, just because I'm married doesn't 0:10:50.679 --> 0:10:53.360 mean that I'm that I don't suck at it. But yeah, Mike, 0:10:53.440 --> 0:10:55.640 so you said that you're looking for somebody who's vulnerable. 0:10:56.120 --> 0:10:58.440 What are some other qualities, because obviously we're a dating 0:10:58.440 --> 0:11:01.240 podcast that you look for in a in somebody that 0:11:01.320 --> 0:11:04.520 you hope to have a relationship with. To be honest, 0:11:04.760 --> 0:11:08.640 I'm pretty out there. I'm pretty outgoing. So I would 0:11:08.679 --> 0:11:11.240 say someone that isn't afraid to get out of their 0:11:11.240 --> 0:11:15.600 comfort zone, right, someone that is willing to try to 0:11:15.679 --> 0:11:17.559 do something at least one time, you know, not be 0:11:17.679 --> 0:11:19.480 so rigid in their ways, that's stuck in their ways. 0:11:20.120 --> 0:11:23.960 I love to be goofy and smile, laugh, and but 0:11:24.240 --> 0:11:26.400 like Dean said, I definitely can confront people. And so 0:11:26.480 --> 0:11:28.440 I want someone. I want a woman that has like 0:11:28.440 --> 0:11:32.880 a strong backgrown I can tell me when I'm wrong. Yeah, 0:11:33.040 --> 0:11:35.040 we gotta find we gotta find the right girl from Mike. 0:11:35.040 --> 0:11:38.040 I know there's been a lot of Mike for Bachelor 0:11:38.080 --> 0:11:42.679 promotion before Matt James was uh given the role, and 0:11:42.720 --> 0:11:44.920 I honestly I was in the same the same train 0:11:45.000 --> 0:11:47.880 as well. I always wanted Mike for Bachelor. It's like 0:11:47.920 --> 0:11:49.800 we never really got that happy ending that we wanted 0:11:50.440 --> 0:11:53.480 for you out a bachelor in Paradise. Obviously you and 0:11:53.520 --> 0:11:56.800 I kind of rolled at the same time, um, but 0:11:56.840 --> 0:11:59.760 there was just always I feel like it just it 0:12:00.000 --> 0:12:01.439 been able to connect for you, and I feel like, 0:12:01.480 --> 0:12:03.240 obviously all we want for you is to be happy 0:12:03.240 --> 0:12:04.800 and to be with that person that's right for you. 0:12:05.480 --> 0:12:08.320 And I'm not gonna say we feel slighted because Matt James, 0:12:08.480 --> 0:12:10.800 who we've never even seen on television before is the Bachelor, 0:12:10.800 --> 0:12:13.719 because I'm sure he's gonna be fantastic. But I was 0:12:13.720 --> 0:12:15.679 always pulling for you to be the Bachelor, and I 0:12:15.720 --> 0:12:17.800 feel like maybe one day we can see it. Who knows. 0:12:19.320 --> 0:12:23.280 I appreciate that helming, but I I mean, I would 0:12:23.320 --> 0:12:26.720 say that's not something that I hold my breath on, 0:12:26.840 --> 0:12:29.839 you know, like if it happens, and it happens and 0:12:29.880 --> 0:12:32.200 I'm ben laid for it, but as well, like I'm 0:12:32.200 --> 0:12:36.040 working on myself and doing great things for myself to 0:12:36.080 --> 0:12:38.440 build myself up. So therefore, when I do find my partner, 0:12:39.200 --> 0:12:42.839 I'm ready, you know, to uh give all of me 0:12:42.880 --> 0:12:46.320 to her. So there's two things that I wanted to 0:12:46.360 --> 0:12:50.160 ask him, Like, um, one, there was a lot of 0:12:50.200 --> 0:12:53.560 rumors when Claire was the first announced as the Bachelorrette 0:12:53.559 --> 0:12:55.679 that you. I don't know if you heard any of 0:12:55.679 --> 0:13:00.880 these that like you potentially could show up on her season. Um, well, Mike, 0:13:01.160 --> 0:13:04.160 my question is I because I heard the rumors about that, 0:13:04.160 --> 0:13:06.400 because Matt was announced as the Bachelor and then and 0:13:06.440 --> 0:13:09.240 then I heard like there was online rumors that is 0:13:09.280 --> 0:13:13.040 Mike Johnson gonna show up on Clarity. So one, why 0:13:13.080 --> 0:13:14.920 do you think those rumors are out there? And then too, 0:13:14.960 --> 0:13:16.840 do you think you'd ever go back on the Bachelor 0:13:16.920 --> 0:13:20.520 Bachelor franchise. I would go on to Bachelor franchise again 0:13:20.559 --> 0:13:23.400 if you know everything was right. And then I think 0:13:23.400 --> 0:13:26.600 the rumors were just there because people want to see 0:13:26.600 --> 0:13:31.600 your boy on TV again. That's right, baby, that's right. 0:13:32.920 --> 0:13:36.560 People want to see that file. I know if Matt 0:13:36.640 --> 0:13:40.840 James Bachelor one, then we need if if Mike Johnson 0:13:40.920 --> 0:13:44.560 is still single by two, which would be a miracle 0:13:44.720 --> 0:13:48.680 because you're good looking, smart, intelligent, suite and a catch. 0:13:49.080 --> 0:13:53.000 But if somehow you are not taken by two, we 0:13:53.040 --> 0:13:55.560 are saying it here first and help by second dating 0:13:56.120 --> 0:14:01.720 Mike Johnson Bachelor pretty say that I definitely do. I 0:14:01.720 --> 0:14:05.400 don't got your jaw line though broke just the jaw line. Yeah, 0:14:05.480 --> 0:14:11.120 you have a way better beard. Okay, well I'm missing 0:14:11.120 --> 0:14:12.719 all I'm missing both of those things. No beard, no 0:14:12.840 --> 0:14:15.199 jol on. But Mike, we got the The live listeners 0:14:15.240 --> 0:14:18.240 are listening in and they're asking you questions. Uh, Tori 0:14:18.400 --> 0:14:21.320 wants to know how are you dating and quarantine because 0:14:21.720 --> 0:14:24.360 hosting this podcast, it's it's Jared and I who are 0:14:24.360 --> 0:14:26.160 both in relationships, so it's kind of hard for us 0:14:26.200 --> 0:14:29.000 to be like topical with how we're dating new people 0:14:29.080 --> 0:14:31.600 during quarantine. So what what's kind of like, what's been 0:14:31.680 --> 0:14:34.440 your method for a meeting new people and then be 0:14:35.560 --> 0:14:40.160 progressing our relationship in this environment. I definitely have going 0:14:40.160 --> 0:14:43.280 on some dates in quarantine. Knt Lie, I think that, 0:14:43.520 --> 0:14:47.720 yeah this yeah breaking news here and help I suck 0:14:47.760 --> 0:14:53.080 at dating. Then you already said I'm always be one hunted, right, 0:14:53.600 --> 0:14:58.360 so I'm definitely appreciate that. Quarantine. Uh, you just gotta 0:14:58.400 --> 0:15:00.920 be creator, you know you could be You still can 0:15:00.960 --> 0:15:03.720 be suave, you still can be poised, you still can 0:15:03.760 --> 0:15:07.080 have swag and just come up with some out of 0:15:07.080 --> 0:15:09.000 the box ideas. Right. So let's say I'm dating a 0:15:09.000 --> 0:15:12.240 woman and I know her I know her favorite dessert. 0:15:12.600 --> 0:15:15.120 I can have cheesecake factory delivered to a career you know, 0:15:15.160 --> 0:15:17.280 Ober eats it or something right right before I call 0:15:17.320 --> 0:15:19.400 it for our FaceTime. You know, there's all kinds of 0:15:19.440 --> 0:15:22.320 stuff that you can do that's sweet and sincere. I mean, 0:15:22.320 --> 0:15:25.280 it's it's what what are we talking about here? How? 0:15:25.440 --> 0:15:26.520 How do you? How do you meet these girls that 0:15:26.560 --> 0:15:30.720 we're talking like dating apps? Or are you like you're 0:15:30.720 --> 0:15:32.960 going for an over in Texas and you're like you're 0:15:32.960 --> 0:15:35.440 hollering at girls from a distance, Because again, it's like, 0:15:36.320 --> 0:15:39.520 how well can you really gauge interest in someone if 0:15:39.560 --> 0:15:41.400 you can't really get closer than six feets of them? 0:15:41.400 --> 0:15:45.520 You know what I mean? Um, I think that well 0:15:45.560 --> 0:15:47.200 one the way I've done it to answer the question 0:15:47.200 --> 0:15:53.560 I've been, I definitely have started to use them. Yeah, absolutely, 0:15:53.840 --> 0:15:59.120 as you add Instagram, Instagram is unquestionably the best dating 0:15:59.120 --> 0:16:04.000 app and people my in My uh My Mistake, Bumble 0:16:04.240 --> 0:16:07.640 and Tender and Brian are all great apps, but Instagram 0:16:07.720 --> 0:16:11.480 is the app that's best for meeting people. Now, So 0:16:11.480 --> 0:16:13.440 I'm I'm gonna put you all on game that y'all 0:16:13.480 --> 0:16:15.080 do not need to know because y'all are both, you 0:16:15.120 --> 0:16:20.240 know in committed beautiful relationships. Um, I have gotten a 0:16:20.360 --> 0:16:24.240 date off of LinkedIn. They're serious, which is while to say, 0:16:24.280 --> 0:16:27.120 tell us how that happens. We want to hear this, 0:16:28.880 --> 0:16:31.320 I mean just on LinkedIn, Like I'm I'm serious about 0:16:31.480 --> 0:16:33.360 I try to be a professional in our regardens because 0:16:33.360 --> 0:16:35.480 I've been on PP. I try to keep it professional 0:16:35.560 --> 0:16:38.240 right and keep it g But like, if I find 0:16:38.280 --> 0:16:44.160 you like alluring and attractive, like outside from a looks perspective, 0:16:44.200 --> 0:16:47.120 But if I like your that's your goal driven in 0:16:47.560 --> 0:16:50.160 or goal oriented, I'm gonna come high. As you know. 0:16:50.240 --> 0:16:52.640 So you know in the leaked n d MS it 0:16:52.680 --> 0:16:56.400 works the same way. Here's here's my question for you, 0:16:56.440 --> 0:16:58.880 because Mike, I used to be and we talked about 0:16:58.920 --> 0:17:00.400 this quite a bit on Bachelor Impaired Us. I used 0:17:00.400 --> 0:17:03.560 to be a recruiter for small businesses in California. But 0:17:04.080 --> 0:17:06.240 if I ever found a girl on LinkedIn, I was like, oh, 0:17:06.280 --> 0:17:08.240 this girl is cute. I would always like try to 0:17:08.240 --> 0:17:09.960 find their Instagram because it's a little more of a 0:17:10.000 --> 0:17:14.160 personal platform, right, So you're just like, you know, screw 0:17:14.240 --> 0:17:15.920 going to Instagram. I'm just gonna go ahead and straight 0:17:15.960 --> 0:17:18.000 send him an email. Real quick on on LinkedIn and 0:17:18.000 --> 0:17:20.480 see if they get back to me maybe like there's 0:17:20.480 --> 0:17:22.119 a good there's a good way to word it. Two like, 0:17:22.160 --> 0:17:23.560 let's me know for coffee and see if we can 0:17:23.560 --> 0:17:26.040 connect like like professionally, and see if anything goes from there. 0:17:26.040 --> 0:17:27.720 But I just want to know, like how did that 0:17:27.880 --> 0:17:31.560 whole thing happen? No, like literally that's what it is. 0:17:31.600 --> 0:17:33.920 So I don't drink coffee work, but I'll say something like, Hey, 0:17:34.359 --> 0:17:36.720 I'm going for a jog tomorrow morning at six am 0:17:36.800 --> 0:17:38.760 or seven am. Would you like to go to Starbus 0:17:38.800 --> 0:17:43.240 you get get a strawberry frap. I'll tell I'll tell 0:17:43.280 --> 0:17:45.480 you what. I'll tell you what's happening right now. I 0:17:45.600 --> 0:17:48.720 literally I can guarantee you this is happening right now. 0:17:48.760 --> 0:17:52.080 Every girl in the Dallas Houston, Texas surrounding area is 0:17:52.200 --> 0:17:55.040 updating their LinkedIn profile to make it as a feeling 0:17:55.119 --> 0:18:00.560 as possible for you to send them. In his word, 0:18:01.400 --> 0:18:03.119 because I can see more of you right here, and 0:18:03.440 --> 0:18:06.280 I can see I can see more of your personality 0:18:06.359 --> 0:18:09.359 from a business aspect. Right on Instagram, we always showing 0:18:09.440 --> 0:18:13.600 like highlight, highlight, highlight, But if you're actually active on LinkedIn, 0:18:13.840 --> 0:18:16.560 says something right there, because who's active on LinkedIn? Nobody? 0:18:16.640 --> 0:18:18.680 But if you are active on LinkedIn, that says something 0:18:18.720 --> 0:18:21.440 to me right there, he speaks to your personality more right, 0:18:22.880 --> 0:18:26.679 I gotta say something too, honestly, you you you using LinkedIn, 0:18:26.920 --> 0:18:30.760 you're not just about uh luks, because what you're doing 0:18:30.800 --> 0:18:33.080 on Instagram is they're all, like you said, these curated images, 0:18:33.119 --> 0:18:35.320 these models, but you don't really you you don't really 0:18:35.320 --> 0:18:37.840 get to know anything about them until you, you know, 0:18:37.920 --> 0:18:39.600 hopefully you get to meet them. But on LinkedIn, you 0:18:39.640 --> 0:18:44.080 see recommendations and their education and their their job history. 0:18:44.080 --> 0:18:46.280 You gotta learn a lot more about them than just 0:18:46.359 --> 0:18:48.359 how they look. And so that honestly says a lot 0:18:48.400 --> 0:18:50.879 about you that you're that you're wanting to get deeper 0:18:50.960 --> 0:18:52.320 right out of the out of the gates too, which 0:18:52.359 --> 0:18:54.399 is I'll be honest, I've used linked in as a 0:18:54.440 --> 0:18:57.760 dating resource years and years and years ago, uh and 0:18:57.800 --> 0:18:59.880 it always failed me miserably. So it's good to hear 0:18:59.920 --> 0:19:01.639 that you're using it a little bit more successful than 0:19:01.640 --> 0:19:05.720 I ever had, you know, But let's be honest, like, 0:19:06.320 --> 0:19:07.840 years and years and years ago, we both were in 0:19:07.840 --> 0:19:12.480 different positions, right, So yeah, no, you're you're absolutely You're right, 0:19:12.480 --> 0:19:14.280 You're absolutely right. There was there was times where I 0:19:14.320 --> 0:19:16.160 had conversations too and I was like, yeah, like let's 0:19:16.200 --> 0:19:17.960 meet up for coffee to this girl who like, yes, 0:19:18.000 --> 0:19:20.679 she was very promising as like a potential candidate for 0:19:20.720 --> 0:19:22.000 a role that I might have had, But there was 0:19:22.040 --> 0:19:25.040 like underlying like, oh she might be cute, we might 0:19:25.080 --> 0:19:28.520 like like hit it off whatever. Uh and uh, yeah, 0:19:28.520 --> 0:19:30.600 I just I never had the luck with it, but 0:19:30.880 --> 0:19:32.840 it's good to know that that that that lives on 0:19:32.920 --> 0:19:36.040 and other people out there and that are more more 0:19:36.080 --> 0:19:39.960 successful with it too. Yeah. Fact, well I'm not successfully. 0:19:40.040 --> 0:19:42.120 I don't I don't gotta, I don't have a significant 0:19:42.160 --> 0:19:45.600 other yet. It's not Aggie official. So once that happens 0:19:45.600 --> 0:19:49.240 in then I'm good and I'm g Hey, did I 0:19:49.280 --> 0:19:51.159 see something too that you and Connor moved in together 0:19:51.320 --> 0:19:53.840 down in Texas as well? Yeah, Connor and I definitely 0:19:54.040 --> 0:19:56.000 we're moving in together. We have to move in today 0:19:56.280 --> 0:19:59.280 just yet, but we're moving in in Austin. So y'all 0:19:59.320 --> 0:20:02.560 both have come out, you know, have some well, have 0:20:02.680 --> 0:20:04.720 some fun. Only if Connor lets me, I don't know 0:20:04.760 --> 0:20:10.240 if he's forgiving me, uh the whole forget about that. 0:20:11.119 --> 0:20:13.080 I let you forget about that because to me, it's 0:20:13.119 --> 0:20:16.520 like I'm told Connor about this right because I don't 0:20:16.560 --> 0:20:19.919 really care. I just want people happy. I'm like Connor, 0:20:19.920 --> 0:20:21.359 bro that was like a year ago. I mean, like, 0:20:22.240 --> 0:20:25.560 whatever it happened has happened. It's subsided. Obviously, I have 0:20:25.600 --> 0:20:27.120 to share this story real quick. Wit. When I pulled 0:20:27.119 --> 0:20:29.679 into Paradise, Uh, like I said earlier, I was I 0:20:29.720 --> 0:20:32.359 was a later arrival. Mike was the arrival just before 0:20:32.400 --> 0:20:35.240 me and I got there, talked to the girls as 0:20:35.280 --> 0:20:37.320 you do that's customary for once you get to Paradise, 0:20:37.760 --> 0:20:39.760 and uh, ultimately I decided took Kalin on the day. 0:20:39.840 --> 0:20:41.479 Get back from that day and all the new arrivals 0:20:41.520 --> 0:20:44.720 get put into like a room where they I was like, 0:20:44.720 --> 0:20:47.200 sleep together, and I wake up the next day because 0:20:47.359 --> 0:20:50.119 the date went late, and Mike and I had this 0:20:50.160 --> 0:20:52.800 conversation and Mike said something along the lines up, yeah, 0:20:52.840 --> 0:20:54.920 I got here yesterday. I took Kalin on the day too, 0:20:55.440 --> 0:20:57.199 and I just want to let you know that I 0:20:57.240 --> 0:21:00.720 admire you for having good taste. And I was like, dude, honestly, 0:21:00.760 --> 0:21:03.119 there's a million ways you can approach a conversation with 0:21:03.200 --> 0:21:05.119 someone that just took the girl that you're interested in 0:21:05.240 --> 0:21:07.480 out on a date and telling them they have good 0:21:07.520 --> 0:21:11.240 taste is like the most bad ass way to say 0:21:11.320 --> 0:21:14.400 it because it makes you seem so like and I'm 0:21:14.440 --> 0:21:15.920 not not seeing it, but it makes you honest, like 0:21:15.960 --> 0:21:17.720 the coolest guy, because most people would be like piste 0:21:17.720 --> 0:21:20.639 off or like they would get territorial or whatever, but 0:21:20.720 --> 0:21:23.200 not Mike. Mike is a dude that a hundred percent 0:21:23.280 --> 0:21:26.520 the entire time was like I I respect it, Like, uh, 0:21:26.560 --> 0:21:28.200 you know, it was a good decision. I had the 0:21:28.240 --> 0:21:31.439 same idea and it was a hundred percent supportive and 0:21:31.680 --> 0:21:34.840 uh embracing of the entire situation. And I'm not saying 0:21:34.840 --> 0:21:37.280 Connor wasn't this way, but there was definitely like a 0:21:37.280 --> 0:21:40.720 little bit of resentment I felt from Connor towards me, 0:21:40.800 --> 0:21:42.439 even though it's a bit of a different situation. But 0:21:42.440 --> 0:21:44.359 I had to give Mike some some props for that, 0:21:44.400 --> 0:21:46.520 because that was that was a very stand up move 0:21:46.600 --> 0:21:50.280 on your part. Bron forgot all about that. I remember 0:21:50.280 --> 0:21:52.879 it now as you said it, but after that's crazy, 0:21:52.880 --> 0:21:54.520 that is exactly what I said to you. I forgot 0:21:54.520 --> 0:21:57.159 all about that, absolutely. I was I was laying in 0:21:57.160 --> 0:21:59.119 the top bunk two and uh and you said that 0:21:59.160 --> 0:22:01.720 to me, And I was like, literally like a bunk 0:22:01.760 --> 0:22:03.480 bed that was nine ft tall and Mike and I 0:22:03.600 --> 0:22:06.040 are standing out of I because he's so goddamn Paul 0:22:06.560 --> 0:22:09.000 And you said it to me, and I was like, 0:22:09.240 --> 0:22:10.520 I was like, dud, I just met you, and that's 0:22:10.560 --> 0:22:12.639 honestly like the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me. 0:22:12.680 --> 0:22:15.320 So thank you so much. So yeah, it's definitely stuck 0:22:15.359 --> 0:22:16.240 with me. So I just want to let you know 0:22:16.240 --> 0:22:19.320 I appreciate that. No the show brow, I just want 0:22:19.359 --> 0:22:23.200 people happen. So being in the Bachelor world, man, it's 0:22:23.240 --> 0:22:27.679 just like you're one degree of separation from everybody, you know. 0:22:27.960 --> 0:22:31.520 It's it's it's just something that Connor will be I'm 0:22:31.560 --> 0:22:36.560 sure a okay with um. But Mike, before you go, 0:22:37.200 --> 0:22:39.280 I wanted to ask you. You know, you're doing all 0:22:39.320 --> 0:22:42.480 these things, You're writing books, You're staying in the public eye, 0:22:42.560 --> 0:22:45.920 like people are very interested in what Mike Johnson has 0:22:46.320 --> 0:22:49.240 going on next. So in five years, where do you 0:22:49.280 --> 0:22:54.959 see yourself in five years? I appreciate that already known 0:22:54.960 --> 0:22:56.880 the answer to it as well. In five years, I'm 0:22:56.880 --> 0:22:59.159 gonna be a household named ten towns bigger than just 0:22:59.200 --> 0:23:03.919 some dudeails on the damn you do have answer, you 0:23:04.080 --> 0:23:08.560 like when you say something like that's that's happening, Like 0:23:08.600 --> 0:23:11.320 Mike Johnson just said it. It's gonna happen. So he 0:23:11.400 --> 0:23:13.080 just said it the way he said it. Do we know? 0:23:13.119 --> 0:23:15.440 How do we know? Do we know the path that's 0:23:15.440 --> 0:23:19.800 gonna get him there? Or yeah, definitely, I'm just curious. 0:23:20.040 --> 0:23:22.359 Uh yeah, can you share a little bit with that? 0:23:22.560 --> 0:23:24.200 Just a little bit with that, because I'm looking to 0:23:24.280 --> 0:23:25.520 share a little bit. I can be that in that 0:23:25.600 --> 0:23:28.240 same in that same same ballpark in five years as well, 0:23:29.600 --> 0:23:33.360 doing great. You're doing great. I think the biggest thing 0:23:33.520 --> 0:23:37.879 is people don't care about that you've got going on 0:23:38.240 --> 0:23:40.959 until they know that you actually care yourself about what 0:23:41.000 --> 0:23:45.760 you got going on. Right. And so as time continues 0:23:45.800 --> 0:23:48.520 to go on, people will start to believe, like what 0:23:48.640 --> 0:23:51.080 you just said, Dean about me, which I completely forgot about. 0:23:51.440 --> 0:23:53.840 That's my true nature, my true personality. Right, So someone 0:23:53.840 --> 0:23:56.040 will be like, wow, Mike isn't put it on the front. 0:23:56.240 --> 0:23:58.000 He said that when no cameras were around. He's just 0:23:58.040 --> 0:24:00.560 talking to the homie that he's just met today, Right, 0:24:01.000 --> 0:24:04.879 And so my path will be I'm writing a book 0:24:04.920 --> 0:24:10.159 that the next thing like, wow, he's not playing any games, 0:24:11.280 --> 0:24:13.760 my apologies. And then from there, I'm going on a 0:24:13.840 --> 0:24:16.760 book tour, and then from there I have huge news 0:24:16.800 --> 0:24:18.720 coming out next year, two big things that I'm working 0:24:18.760 --> 0:24:21.760 on right now in regards to the same round, but 0:24:21.800 --> 0:24:23.840 I'll get a whole lot more engagement on because it's 0:24:24.240 --> 0:24:26.640 a topic everyone wants to know about. Um. And then 0:24:26.680 --> 0:24:29.480 from there, I'm gonna have a badass wife was super 0:24:29.520 --> 0:24:32.320 soul spirited, has some dope ass kids. I might travel 0:24:32.359 --> 0:24:38.960 like Dean and I'm just gonna go bigger. I love it. Dude, 0:24:39.080 --> 0:24:41.080 you know who roinds me of? Like and this is 0:24:42.359 --> 0:24:44.520 I hope you take this as a conflict because have 0:24:44.600 --> 0:24:48.879 you ever seen The First Bad Boys? Because Will Smith's character, 0:24:48.960 --> 0:24:52.480 Mike Larry is like just like the coolest character of 0:24:52.480 --> 0:24:55.119 all time. He's like the most badass guy. Dude, you 0:24:55.200 --> 0:24:57.200 remind me so much with Mike Lowry. I don't know 0:24:57.240 --> 0:24:59.240 if you remember in the movie, but Martin Lawrence has 0:24:59.240 --> 0:25:01.640 to pretend he Will Smith, and like the way Will 0:25:01.680 --> 0:25:04.119 Smith says his name of the movie, He's like Mike 0:25:04.440 --> 0:25:10.680 Larry like because he's just so cool you're Mike Lowry 0:25:10.760 --> 0:25:13.480 because you're just like badass. So the point being is 0:25:13.520 --> 0:25:15.600 you should be starting in Bad Boys four. That's pretty 0:25:15.680 --> 0:25:18.680 much what I'm getting at. Let's make it happen. That's 0:25:18.720 --> 0:25:22.080 my nickname. Man. I had to get rid of that 0:25:22.160 --> 0:25:26.240 nickname because Mike Larry also has a very pretentious side, 0:25:26.280 --> 0:25:29.200 and so I don't want that pretentious, that pretentious aspect 0:25:29.200 --> 0:25:31.480 to it. It's just my But he's got a sweet 0:25:31.520 --> 0:25:33.560 he's got a good heart. That's why everybody loves him. 0:25:33.600 --> 0:25:36.600 You know, he's got he's good on the inside. You 0:25:36.680 --> 0:25:41.200 know that is true. That is what I am. Um. Well, Mike, 0:25:41.200 --> 0:25:43.479 thanks so much for joining us. Man, you are always 0:25:43.480 --> 0:25:46.400 a pleasure. Thank you for being on our first live podcast. 0:25:46.400 --> 0:25:48.640 We can't tell you how much we appreciate it. Um. 0:25:48.720 --> 0:25:52.760 Once again, everybody, go preorder Mike's book today, Making the 0:25:52.880 --> 0:25:55.320 Love You Want and is available for preorder today and 0:25:55.359 --> 0:25:57.320 it comes out in the fall. Do you have a 0:25:57.440 --> 0:26:00.560 date for when it comes out yet? Yeah, it comes 0:26:00.560 --> 0:26:03.960 out October. Tewod World Smile Day. You know we do 0:26:04.080 --> 0:26:07.280 that on purpose. Go to Mike Johnson smile dot com 0:26:07.359 --> 0:26:11.520 and check it out. Awesome Mike Johnson, Smile Man. We 0:26:11.560 --> 0:26:15.359 appreciate you, man, I thank you all. Yeah, I have 0:26:15.359 --> 0:26:18.960 a good one. Congratulations. Also, by the way, thanks man. 0:26:19.080 --> 0:26:21.560 Oh dude, come on your our first live guest on 0:26:21.600 --> 0:26:24.960 our first live podcast. Unbelievable. You're the man. Take care. 0:26:24.960 --> 0:26:26.720 We'll talk to you soon. Thank you. You don't have 0:26:26.720 --> 0:26:28.879 a good one. Tell tell your ladies, I said, guy 0:26:28.920 --> 0:26:32.239 as well. I will, Man, I won't. I promise you 0:26:32.280 --> 0:26:55.440 I won't. Yeah, yeah, Tellember live, help I suck at David. 0:26:55.560 --> 0:27:00.920 Oh my goshute, Sorry for sore is over there? How 0:27:00.960 --> 0:27:04.280 are you, Taylor? I'm good. I just caught the end 0:27:04.359 --> 0:27:08.960 of Mike there, and he is so fantastic and I 0:27:09.000 --> 0:27:12.800 loved both of you in a way like boy crushing 0:27:12.880 --> 0:27:18.440 on him is very cute to watch sometimes by crush 0:27:18.520 --> 0:27:22.600 on Mike. You know, it's not often, but sometimes I 0:27:22.680 --> 0:27:25.280 wish I was single so I could give take a 0:27:25.280 --> 0:27:27.280 shot at Mike, you know what I mean. I don't 0:27:27.280 --> 0:27:28.560 know if it I don't know if they looked at 0:27:28.560 --> 0:27:30.119 I don't know if it would happen or not. But 0:27:30.200 --> 0:27:33.840 I just sometimes I wonder what it. I have a 0:27:33.840 --> 0:27:37.800 feeling You're not alone in that thought, Dean. I agree 0:27:37.800 --> 0:27:40.720 with that anyways, Taylor, Welcome to the podcast. We love 0:27:40.760 --> 0:27:43.919 having you here. You've been here many times. UM. We 0:27:43.960 --> 0:27:47.439 are stoked to have you as always. UM. Tell us 0:27:47.480 --> 0:27:49.280 a little bit about what's going on in the life 0:27:49.280 --> 0:27:52.000 of Taylor No. One. We have live listeners listening from 0:27:52.040 --> 0:27:56.440 all over the world, from Africa, from Australia, from Europe, 0:27:56.640 --> 0:27:58.880 and even up in Canada, which we know you love 0:27:58.920 --> 0:28:03.040 so much. UM about what's going on in your life? 0:28:04.680 --> 0:28:08.359 What's going on in my life? Still some Canada, Still 0:28:08.400 --> 0:28:12.359 some Canada in my life? Um uh yeah. In like 0:28:12.440 --> 0:28:16.840 two weeks, I'm starting my PhD and clinical sexology. UM. 0:28:16.880 --> 0:28:22.320 So that's exciting but also terrifying. UM. Still seeing clients 0:28:22.400 --> 0:28:25.800 literally hopping off of clients to hop onto here. UM. 0:28:25.840 --> 0:28:28.360 So that's been going really well. Trying to keep all 0:28:28.400 --> 0:28:32.040 these freaking plants alive. Um is like a full time job, 0:28:32.080 --> 0:28:37.000 it feels like. So yeah, things that have been things 0:28:37.000 --> 0:28:40.000 have been going. UM. So hold on, I want to 0:28:40.000 --> 0:28:46.080 go back to your You're currently getting your degree in sexology. Yes, yeah, yeah. 0:28:46.160 --> 0:28:49.840 In September I start my PhD and clinical sexology, so 0:28:50.160 --> 0:28:52.880 it'll be a two year program. Um the whole first 0:28:52.960 --> 0:28:56.080 year and thankfully have a girlfriend here who's UM. An 0:28:56.080 --> 0:29:00.000 a sex clified sex therapist and we're taking the program together. UM. 0:29:00.000 --> 0:29:01.720 But yeah, the whole first year is like your coursework 0:29:01.760 --> 0:29:04.840 and then the second year is your dissertation and supervision. 0:29:05.040 --> 0:29:08.200 So I'll continue seeing clients through that, um. But it's 0:29:08.200 --> 0:29:10.920 super exciting. Like I miss being in school so much, 0:29:11.160 --> 0:29:14.440 and I never thought I would ever get my PhD 0:29:14.800 --> 0:29:18.160 or like I've always wanted to be a sexologist and 0:29:18.200 --> 0:29:20.880 like a sex therapist, but always felt like it was 0:29:20.960 --> 0:29:23.080 just too far out there for me to do. I 0:29:23.080 --> 0:29:26.080 don't know why. I just like had imposter syndrome. UM. 0:29:26.120 --> 0:29:28.640 But now I'm like, holy sh it's happening of doing 0:29:28.680 --> 0:29:31.400 it and it's really exciting. And I know you talked 0:29:31.440 --> 0:29:33.840 about this in the podcast before, but just give a 0:29:34.000 --> 0:29:39.440 like little synopsis of what you do as a sex therapist. Yes. So, 0:29:39.440 --> 0:29:42.520 I feel like the biggest thing that sex therapists and 0:29:42.560 --> 0:29:47.520 sexologists do is help destigmatize sex, help people unlearn a 0:29:47.560 --> 0:29:51.680 lot of the shame that that is kind of unfortunately 0:29:51.720 --> 0:29:56.000 built into our sex education. UM. And it's not you know, 0:29:56.320 --> 0:30:00.120 having sex with people or anything like that, um, but 0:30:00.240 --> 0:30:03.360 it's it's a lot of like providing exercises, right and 0:30:03.440 --> 0:30:07.280 just helping normalize the language around sex, talking about masturbation 0:30:07.440 --> 0:30:09.960 and anal play and all these things that people feel 0:30:10.040 --> 0:30:14.160 like really, look are you talking about that, um, and 0:30:14.200 --> 0:30:17.000 just helping normalize it. It's a huge part of it. 0:30:18.280 --> 0:30:21.440 I completely agree. I am. I I love what you're 0:30:21.480 --> 0:30:24.000 doing because I think we have to kind of work 0:30:24.040 --> 0:30:27.400 towards society where we normalize sex and more importantly, normalized 0:30:27.440 --> 0:30:31.239 conversations around sex because like, as growing even like from 0:30:31.240 --> 0:30:33.920 my own personal experience just growing up as a guy, 0:30:34.400 --> 0:30:37.480 especially in the digitalays with porn. I mean, let's be honest, 0:30:37.560 --> 0:30:41.440 he knows what I'm talking about. UM, It's like you're 0:30:41.480 --> 0:30:45.000 just exposed to this. Don't don't act like you don't 0:30:45.000 --> 0:30:47.720 know what I'm talking about, but you're just like exposed 0:30:47.760 --> 0:30:51.280 to this world, you know, of of what just kind 0:30:51.320 --> 0:30:53.360 of learning on the fly. And my parents were the 0:30:53.400 --> 0:30:55.760 greatest parents, but like I never had to sit down 0:30:55.800 --> 0:30:58.360 conversation with my dad where my dad was like, hey, listen, 0:30:58.360 --> 0:31:00.800 this is this is what it's all about. Like you had, 0:31:00.840 --> 0:31:05.240 We had like many very uncomfortable and awkward conversations about it. 0:31:05.400 --> 0:31:08.520 Like I'll never forget this is an embarrassing story. But whatever, 0:31:08.640 --> 0:31:11.080 I'm you know one time, you know, I'm in my 0:31:11.120 --> 0:31:14.800 teenage years, I'm in my bedroom alone, you know, I 0:31:15.360 --> 0:31:19.320 you know, start you know whatever, and then I start 0:31:19.400 --> 0:31:27.040 what Jared's put words to it, saying, I know you're right, 0:31:27.080 --> 0:31:32.959 You're right now, no shame. So I started, uh choking 0:31:33.000 --> 0:31:37.160 the chicken as nice. No we need we need to 0:31:37.160 --> 0:31:44.080 look at It's okay to say you started touchingsturbating. Yep, 0:31:44.120 --> 0:31:47.280 I started masturbating, and I got walked in on It 0:31:47.320 --> 0:31:48.800 was the only time I ever got walked in. My 0:31:48.920 --> 0:31:53.320 dad walked in and it was horror bying. But like 0:31:53.440 --> 0:31:55.719 later on that night, my dad sat down with me, 0:31:56.240 --> 0:31:58.280 and he didn't know what to say because like my 0:31:58.360 --> 0:32:00.840 dad's super old school, you know, so he's never really 0:32:00.880 --> 0:32:04.840 confronted a situation like this before. And he was very 0:32:04.880 --> 0:32:07.960 sweet about it. He was he was I remember him 0:32:08.040 --> 0:32:11.840 just being like, you know, that's normal, just you know, 0:32:12.520 --> 0:32:16.920 try not to do it a lot, and like it 0:32:17.040 --> 0:32:19.520 wasn't bad advice. It was just like we didn't know. 0:32:19.720 --> 0:32:22.680 But I I think, as you know, Ashley and I 0:32:22.720 --> 0:32:26.040 start talking about having kids, I want to you know, 0:32:26.160 --> 0:32:29.360 prepare myself and I want to be as educated as possible, 0:32:29.400 --> 0:32:31.360 and I want to feel as comfortable as possible to 0:32:31.400 --> 0:32:34.360 talk with my kids about these things because I want 0:32:34.360 --> 0:32:36.640 them to learn it at somewhat of an early age. 0:32:37.840 --> 0:32:42.160 M h yeah. I mean you literally start teaching your 0:32:42.240 --> 0:32:46.080 child about their relationship with their genitalia when they are 0:32:46.160 --> 0:32:50.760 like still a year old, right, because when you're changing 0:32:50.760 --> 0:32:53.880 their diaper and when they are going to like touch 0:32:53.920 --> 0:32:56.920 their genitals in a non sexual right right there, just 0:32:56.960 --> 0:33:00.920 like I'm figuring out my body parts. UM, parents often 0:33:01.560 --> 0:33:03.600 are moving their hands away or swatting it away or 0:33:03.640 --> 0:33:06.120 saying nope, nope, we don't touch there. We don't touch there, 0:33:06.160 --> 0:33:08.800 we don't touch there. Right. That's kind of like the 0:33:08.840 --> 0:33:12.040 first messaging that you start getting about your relationship with 0:33:12.320 --> 0:33:16.960 your genitalia. UM. So there's so many there, there really is, 0:33:17.000 --> 0:33:21.560 no I think the sooner the better. It's just starting 0:33:21.560 --> 0:33:26.240 with anatomy. Even my UM, I consider like my chosen sister. UM, 0:33:26.320 --> 0:33:29.480 she's five years old, and you know she's learning the 0:33:29.520 --> 0:33:33.239 proper anatomy to her genitalia. You know, she knows that 0:33:33.280 --> 0:33:35.840 the vagina is the inside part, and she knows that 0:33:35.920 --> 0:33:40.440 the outside is her vulva. UM. I have like uh 0:33:40.560 --> 0:33:43.480 internal diagram of the clitterest it's that little pink thing 0:33:43.800 --> 0:33:48.560 right there. And she saw she's like, what's She's like, 0:33:48.640 --> 0:33:53.400 what's that thing? Um? Grab it because people see me, right, 0:33:54.600 --> 0:33:58.720 please grab it. So I'm like, so I'm like, we 0:33:58.840 --> 0:34:00.880 literally pulled this down and she's like what's this? And 0:34:00.880 --> 0:34:04.160 I'm like, wow, this is like a part of your volva, 0:34:04.400 --> 0:34:06.600 Like this is the part that you see on the outside, 0:34:06.640 --> 0:34:09.239 and this is called your clitterist. This is the external 0:34:09.360 --> 0:34:12.359 part that you see. And then this is all what's 0:34:12.360 --> 0:34:15.440 happened on the inside. So you got bulbs, you got legs, 0:34:15.480 --> 0:34:20.640 and that's all inside where your vagina is. And I 0:34:20.640 --> 0:34:25.839 mean helping young girls especially, but even young boys as well. 0:34:25.880 --> 0:34:29.799 Being able to actually identify their anatomy properly helps us 0:34:29.880 --> 0:34:34.360 to reduce shame around talking about it right, um growing 0:34:34.440 --> 0:34:36.360 up and being able to say, yeah, that's my valva 0:34:36.560 --> 0:34:39.520 and not hearing everyone be like, oh, you're she's a 0:34:39.600 --> 0:34:42.480 pussy like like you know, but you know, be like, 0:34:42.640 --> 0:34:46.000 m that's my valva. You wanna know what? You wanna 0:34:46.040 --> 0:34:50.240 know what's messed up? And I even sharing this stories 0:34:50.280 --> 0:34:53.600 uncomfortable for me, and I understand the idea of normalizing 0:34:53.600 --> 0:34:56.319 these conversations, but you're right, there's like this weird underlying 0:34:57.520 --> 0:35:01.359 inherent not even inherent, but just taught. Thing we're even 0:35:01.360 --> 0:35:03.600 speaking on this stuff is like taboo of sorts, you know. 0:35:04.160 --> 0:35:07.480 Um yeah, I don't think I ever really started asking 0:35:07.520 --> 0:35:11.400 a girl if they liked or what they liked or 0:35:11.440 --> 0:35:15.000 preferred sexually until I was like twenty six years old. 0:35:16.040 --> 0:35:22.200 Twenty six years old, I was sexually girl what they like? 0:35:23.320 --> 0:35:30.759 Isn't that crazy? Yeah? Yeah, well that's a norm. I 0:35:30.800 --> 0:35:32.480 feel like I was an early adopter. I feel like 0:35:32.560 --> 0:35:34.319 when it happened, I was like, Wow, I asked a 0:35:34.400 --> 0:35:37.239 girl if what I was doing was enjoyable for her. 0:35:37.320 --> 0:35:41.120 I'm like, really progressive and cool, But in reality, that's 0:35:41.239 --> 0:35:44.600 pretty bad. Twenty six a decade of sexual activity and 0:35:44.600 --> 0:35:46.239 it took me that long to figure out to start 0:35:46.280 --> 0:35:49.560 asking the girl if they enjoyed it. You know. Well, 0:35:49.600 --> 0:35:53.959 and that's part of sex education that is lacking. Right. 0:35:54.000 --> 0:35:57.080 How do we have these conversations? How do we communicate 0:35:57.120 --> 0:35:59.319 to each other what we like? Right? And a lot 0:35:59.480 --> 0:36:02.759 of you know, I'm just going to speak to being 0:36:02.760 --> 0:36:04.839 a female myself and to the women that I know, 0:36:05.000 --> 0:36:07.600 but I think a lot of women here I'm going 0:36:07.640 --> 0:36:11.640 to generalize, Um, have struggled to identify what feels good 0:36:11.680 --> 0:36:14.279 for them and what they like, and there's fear and 0:36:14.360 --> 0:36:16.759 going about how you communicate it right that if you know, 0:36:16.800 --> 0:36:18.799 when you seem confident in it, then you must be 0:36:18.840 --> 0:36:20.840 a slat and he might be turned off and he 0:36:20.920 --> 0:36:23.640 might be intimidated and threatened that you're saying that he 0:36:23.680 --> 0:36:26.759 doesn't know how to please you, or there's this you know, 0:36:27.880 --> 0:36:31.680 the lack of even asking what do you like? Doesn't 0:36:31.680 --> 0:36:34.560 provide a safe space to even feel comfortable to explore 0:36:34.680 --> 0:36:38.359 that a and then be to communicate it. Um. So, 0:36:38.440 --> 0:36:41.080 I think that's a huge part of our sex education 0:36:41.160 --> 0:36:45.840 that's lacking, because sexual health includes sexual pleasure, and sex 0:36:45.920 --> 0:36:51.080 education should also include pleasure, and being able to communicate 0:36:51.160 --> 0:36:53.480 that and share with your partner what you like and 0:36:53.480 --> 0:36:56.400 what you don't like is a huge part of pleasure 0:36:56.560 --> 0:37:00.360 and health. So what would is there any piece of 0:37:00.360 --> 0:37:02.799 advice that you'd give anybody who's listening right now that 0:37:02.880 --> 0:37:05.480 might be going through situations similar to that where there 0:37:05.520 --> 0:37:09.959 with someone and uh, you know, from what I've heard, 0:37:10.040 --> 0:37:11.919 most of the time this happens to women just because 0:37:11.920 --> 0:37:17.080 it's harder for them to to climax, which is you know, 0:37:17.640 --> 0:37:20.960 how do I how do I convey to my partner 0:37:21.480 --> 0:37:25.920 this is what I like without them feeling uh defensive 0:37:26.080 --> 0:37:27.880 or insecure about it. I feel like a lot of 0:37:27.880 --> 0:37:29.840 guys get insecure if they feel like they can't do 0:37:29.880 --> 0:37:33.080 it on their own, even though I'm sure that happens 0:37:33.120 --> 0:37:38.440 a lot. Yeah. So, first, I think part of the 0:37:38.480 --> 0:37:42.400 reason why it can be difficult for women's experience orgasm 0:37:42.440 --> 0:37:45.080 and pleasures actually in the first place is because of 0:37:45.120 --> 0:37:49.239 a lack of education around our actual anatomy A right, 0:37:49.920 --> 0:37:52.560 um B. I think making sure that you do have 0:37:52.600 --> 0:37:54.880 a safe space to be able to actually explore that 0:37:55.080 --> 0:37:58.919 with your partner. Um. I think it's important in any 0:37:58.960 --> 0:38:02.439 relationship that you understand that your partner has their own 0:38:02.440 --> 0:38:06.120 relationship with their body. They have their own relationships sexually 0:38:06.280 --> 0:38:10.680 with their body that is completely independent of you. And 0:38:10.719 --> 0:38:14.200 that is not to say that, um, you know that 0:38:14.239 --> 0:38:17.040 you don't matter or that you don't provide pleasure, but 0:38:17.160 --> 0:38:19.919 that at the end of the day, you don't own 0:38:19.920 --> 0:38:22.759 your partner's body, So they're going to experience pleasure without you, 0:38:23.160 --> 0:38:26.080 and that's not a diss at you. Right. So, I 0:38:26.080 --> 0:38:28.279 think that's important to have space to be able to 0:38:29.360 --> 0:38:36.040 experiment with that, um, and I it's disappointing because I 0:38:36.080 --> 0:38:39.040 think like we can use sex as a coping skill, 0:38:39.200 --> 0:38:41.239 just like going for a run. Right, So, like, are 0:38:41.280 --> 0:38:44.719 you do you feel intimidated or threatened? Or would your 0:38:44.719 --> 0:38:47.000 partner feel intimidated or threatened if you were having a 0:38:47.040 --> 0:38:49.279 stressful day and you were like, I really need to 0:38:49.280 --> 0:38:53.160 go for a run, probably not. But if you were like, oh, 0:38:53.280 --> 0:38:55.400 I just want to have some you know, alone time, 0:38:55.760 --> 0:38:57.919 or I want to pleasure myself in this way, or 0:38:58.120 --> 0:39:01.000 you know, could you help pleasure me in this way? 0:39:01.040 --> 0:39:05.880 Like this is a specific way that I want. That 0:39:05.920 --> 0:39:09.480 doesn't have to be a different conversation, right, right, I 0:39:09.520 --> 0:39:11.440 agree with that. That makes a lot of sense. It's 0:39:11.440 --> 0:39:15.640 so funny too, especially when educated like yourself speak about it. 0:39:15.840 --> 0:39:18.480 You're always like I agree with that. Yeah, that makes 0:39:18.520 --> 0:39:20.440 a lot of sense. But then like you're living your 0:39:20.440 --> 0:39:22.319 everyday life and you go through it and you're like, well, 0:39:22.360 --> 0:39:24.200 this is kind of weird. But then someone like you 0:39:24.280 --> 0:39:27.160 obviously explains it and you're like, yeah, I definitely see 0:39:27.760 --> 0:39:32.239 how there's been uh malpractice of this up until now 0:39:32.320 --> 0:39:36.439 even going forward, and that's obviously it's a notgoing conversation Um, 0:39:36.560 --> 0:39:39.839 but Taylor, obviously we love the sex topic. I could 0:39:39.840 --> 0:39:42.160 talk about sex with you for hours and hours and 0:39:42.160 --> 0:39:46.520 hours and just be I just love being informed and 0:39:46.600 --> 0:39:50.680 educated on all this stuff. Um, but we do have 0:39:51.000 --> 0:39:52.640 to get to our next guest. But before we get 0:39:52.680 --> 0:39:55.840 to our next guest, we want to talk about Vanessa 0:39:55.920 --> 0:39:58.000 because we love Vanessa. She used to be the you know, 0:39:58.040 --> 0:39:59.760 one of the post with us here on this podcast, 0:39:59.800 --> 0:40:02.960 and you and her are incredibly good friends as well. Um, 0:40:03.280 --> 0:40:07.080 she's got engaged and that's obviously incredible for incredible thing 0:40:07.160 --> 0:40:10.560 for her. Tell us about it because we haven't had 0:40:10.560 --> 0:40:12.240 the chance to speak with her yet on this podcast, 0:40:12.280 --> 0:40:13.719 but we love her, and you know you love her 0:40:13.760 --> 0:40:16.160 as well. Um, and we know that you know Josh 0:40:16.239 --> 0:40:17.719 and Josh is great, but we want to hear from 0:40:17.719 --> 0:40:21.200 you perspective. What's going on with that. Yeah, well I'll 0:40:21.280 --> 0:40:24.560 let her share her story. But I'm just very excited 0:40:24.600 --> 0:40:27.600 for both of them. They're both fantastic people. I absolutely 0:40:27.640 --> 0:40:30.600 love Josh. He's a fantastic guy. He's always like, you know, 0:40:31.120 --> 0:40:33.239 trying to kind of screen the guys I date too, 0:40:33.280 --> 0:40:35.360 to make sure that we have, you know, a good 0:40:35.480 --> 0:40:38.560 double date situation. And then you can, you know, eventually 0:40:38.560 --> 0:40:41.360 one of these days take trips again together. But um no, 0:40:41.600 --> 0:40:45.759 Josh is absolutely fantastic and I'm just incredibly happy for 0:40:45.800 --> 0:40:47.839 both of them, And like since day one, and it's 0:40:47.840 --> 0:40:50.960 always been like, yeah, they're definitely gonna They're definitely gonna 0:40:50.960 --> 0:40:54.759 be together for a very, very, very long time. It 0:40:54.880 --> 0:40:56.719 really has seemed like that, And you definitely do it 0:40:56.760 --> 0:40:59.840 on the head ever since. I remember Vanessa and I 0:41:00.120 --> 0:41:02.000 leaving like a red carpet I Heeart radio event and 0:41:02.000 --> 0:41:03.480 she was like, yeah, I'm gonna get up with Josh 0:41:03.520 --> 0:41:05.160 and she started telling me about Josh and I was like, 0:41:05.440 --> 0:41:09.799 you're probably gonna marry this guy, aren't you. Yeah, so 0:41:09.840 --> 0:41:13.400 you can definitely tell from an early stage. Yeah, all right, 0:41:13.760 --> 0:41:17.600 they're very we we love you. Thank you for joining us. 0:41:17.680 --> 0:41:19.919 Let's talk about your podcast real quick. Before we part ways. 0:41:19.960 --> 0:41:22.560 We talked about a bunch, but um, it's called Let's 0:41:22.600 --> 0:41:27.279 talk about It. Pretty pretty funny, guys, real quick. It's 0:41:27.320 --> 0:41:32.120 almost like you planned that or something, So I haven't 0:41:32.120 --> 0:41:35.040 listened to the other's podcast. Let's talk about it. Uh, 0:41:35.080 --> 0:41:37.840 it's a great podcast. And obviously you just heard her speak. 0:41:37.880 --> 0:41:40.360 You know, she's well educated and well informed and opinionated 0:41:40.400 --> 0:41:42.040 and that's all the all the stuff we want to 0:41:42.080 --> 0:41:44.399 keep here. And so check her out UM and check 0:41:44.400 --> 0:41:47.799 her out Instagram as well. Thank you, thank you, thanks 0:41:49.640 --> 0:41:51.400 of course, and I just want to say thank you 0:41:51.440 --> 0:41:54.640 for everything you're doing and good luck with school. I 0:41:54.680 --> 0:41:57.640 think what you're doing is very important. Uh, And I 0:41:57.680 --> 0:41:59.760 just wanted to let you know that thanks doing my best. 0:42:10.880 --> 0:42:17.640 Oh my good Lord in heaven, the man, the myth, 0:42:17.840 --> 0:42:21.840 the legend is that this thing. Do I see a thigh, 0:42:22.080 --> 0:42:29.520 a very pale hairry thigh? Have Evan bass? Ladies and John, 0:42:32.080 --> 0:42:33.919 how are you doing? But hey, can anyone hear Evan? 0:42:34.040 --> 0:42:36.200 I can't. I can't hear him. Can you you can 0:42:36.239 --> 0:42:39.080 hear him? I can hear him. Yeah, you can't hear him. 0:42:41.040 --> 0:42:44.560 Video just went out. His video just went out. I 0:42:44.560 --> 0:42:47.719 can't see. I can't see it now, either his videos 0:42:47.800 --> 0:42:50.560 out I can't hear or I don't want to see 0:42:50.840 --> 0:42:53.239 or talk to Dean. So hopefully I'm glad to see. 0:42:53.360 --> 0:42:56.680 That was part of my contract. I is this the 0:42:56.719 --> 0:43:03.160 first time you guys are like interacting? No? All right, 0:43:03.600 --> 0:43:05.120 I don't want to talk about it, you know, it's 0:43:05.239 --> 0:43:09.600 it's Uh. I can't remember why I'm so findly have 0:43:09.719 --> 0:43:14.080 my role model, my mute and my best friend as 0:43:14.120 --> 0:43:16.960 a guest on this podcast. It's been so long. I 0:43:16.960 --> 0:43:22.480 have so many times and every single one of them unopened. 0:43:23.560 --> 0:43:29.120 You have so much in common. Yes, look at these 0:43:29.360 --> 0:43:32.160 look at these guys. Wait, how did this seven begin? 0:43:32.480 --> 0:43:35.600 I forget the whole Dean Evan thing. Honestly, it escaped 0:43:35.680 --> 0:43:39.320 my mind until until Dean started saying that your video 0:43:39.440 --> 0:43:40.719 was out, and I was like, oh, he's doing this 0:43:40.840 --> 0:43:44.920 on purpose. Oh yeah, how did this like rivalry even begin? 0:43:45.840 --> 0:43:48.839 I think it's it's been a one sided feud for me. 0:43:48.920 --> 0:43:50.520 I mean, I don't think I've ever talk to me 0:43:51.840 --> 0:43:58.080 always just completely despised him. That's really it. So I 0:43:58.120 --> 0:44:00.480 want to be clear. I want to be clear to say, uh, 0:44:00.560 --> 0:44:04.000 you're not alone in your disposition for me, and it's 0:44:04.040 --> 0:44:08.160 totally warranted, it's totally necessary, and just to let you 0:44:08.200 --> 0:44:17.400 know the feeling is absolutely freaking mutual. Okay, Oh Evan Evan, 0:44:17.760 --> 0:44:21.279 You've got a relationship. And then like it's like by 0:44:21.320 --> 0:44:23.560 bachelor law, I can't be mad at you anymore now 0:44:23.600 --> 0:44:25.120 that you're in a relationship. Like we have to cheer 0:44:25.160 --> 0:44:28.520 for the couples like that's it's it's really was upsetting. Frankly, 0:44:30.600 --> 0:44:32.560 she doesn't listen to this live podcast, but literally, the 0:44:32.600 --> 0:44:34.960 only reason I dated her was to be able to 0:44:35.000 --> 0:44:44.879 make amends with you. Uh freaking awesome, Evan. The last 0:44:44.920 --> 0:44:49.760 time I saw you was when the Patriots uh beat 0:44:49.840 --> 0:44:52.920 the Kansas City Chiefs in one of the greatest games 0:44:53.040 --> 0:44:58.000 ever play. The game. We were down in Cancoon, Mexico 0:44:58.280 --> 0:45:03.440 with Lauren z and it was so funny. We we 0:45:03.680 --> 0:45:06.960 were I'll never forget. So this is what Lauren was 0:45:07.600 --> 0:45:10.279 dating Chris, but before they came out and we were 0:45:10.320 --> 0:45:13.600 grilling her because we were like who she told us 0:45:13.640 --> 0:45:15.359 She's like, oh, I have a boyfriend. Were like, who 0:45:15.400 --> 0:45:17.239 the hell isn't she? So I I can't really, I 0:45:17.239 --> 0:45:19.000 don't want to talk about it, like it's not public, 0:45:19.040 --> 0:45:20.800 and we're like, who the hell is it? And I 0:45:20.840 --> 0:45:23.759 remember at one point in the night we were we 0:45:23.760 --> 0:45:26.000 were driving, we saw this. I don't know if he 0:45:26.040 --> 0:45:28.040 came with this or not, but we saw did you 0:45:28.040 --> 0:45:31.839 come to the the theater? What would we go? S? Yeah, 0:45:31.880 --> 0:45:38.640 of course the musical the Yeah, the rock and roll, Yeah, 0:45:38.920 --> 0:45:43.600 Rock of Ages, and so we saw Rocket Ages and 0:45:43.640 --> 0:45:45.520 at one point in the car I was like, are 0:45:45.560 --> 0:45:48.279 you dating Chris Harrison? Because I just like threw the 0:45:48.360 --> 0:45:50.520 name out there and she was like, oh ha ha ha, 0:45:50.640 --> 0:45:52.360 and she didn't say anything, and then I told her 0:45:52.400 --> 0:45:54.279 forgot about it, and then like two weeks later she 0:45:54.480 --> 0:45:59.040 came out Chris Harrison. Um, but I see that you're 0:45:59.120 --> 0:46:01.360 like in your your your kingdom right now. You you 0:46:01.440 --> 0:46:04.439 kind of look like a king. You're you're doing leg 0:46:04.560 --> 0:46:09.640 is up. You look you know, like your your little bit. No, 0:46:09.719 --> 0:46:11.840 not at all. I think it's fantastic. But how are you? 0:46:11.880 --> 0:46:14.800 How are the kids? How's family? How are you doing? Buddy? Oh, 0:46:14.840 --> 0:46:17.200 everybody's there's just so many of the kids now that 0:46:17.280 --> 0:46:20.360 it's just very intense and um, there's time and I 0:46:20.360 --> 0:46:22.160 can't keep tracking. I mean I've got a nineteen year 0:46:22.200 --> 0:46:25.200 old and then a nine month old. It's like insane. 0:46:25.400 --> 0:46:29.920 So uh yeah, I mean life is good and everybody's healthy, 0:46:30.040 --> 0:46:34.240 thank god. Yeah, things are great. There's been one burning 0:46:34.320 --> 0:46:37.080 question I've been dying to ask you, and not just me, 0:46:37.320 --> 0:46:39.400 have been dying to ask you this question because a 0:46:39.400 --> 0:46:42.320 lot of our live listeners and watches of this podcast 0:46:42.440 --> 0:46:46.840 right now will literally not stop messaging uh this question, 0:46:47.239 --> 0:46:49.799 and we have to know, what is your go to 0:46:50.000 --> 0:46:59.520 cheesecake factory order? Oh? The enchiladas, enchiladas from Cheesecake fac Food. 0:47:00.400 --> 0:47:03.319 They're amazing, They're life changing. You've never had the enchilada is? Yeah, 0:47:03.360 --> 0:47:06.400 you gotta you gotta do. I didn't even know the 0:47:06.440 --> 0:47:09.760 cheesecake factory made enchilada. That's a that's a that's a 0:47:10.120 --> 0:47:14.560 Mexican food order. You can literally say anything and they 0:47:14.560 --> 0:47:17.279 will make it for you. Like. That's one of the 0:47:17.360 --> 0:47:21.080 intense long you know menus have ever seen my entire life. 0:47:23.880 --> 0:47:26.520 We've all been done. You know, is it what is it? 0:47:26.600 --> 0:47:32.839 Pork beef, chicken makes I don't even know anymore. That's 0:47:32.840 --> 0:47:37.640 a good question. What was your what was your go 0:47:37.760 --> 0:47:44.920 to order in Paradise? Oh? Man, uh dude, it was 0:47:45.200 --> 0:47:47.319 it was like they made some dish. It was like 0:47:47.680 --> 0:47:50.920 steak and chicken and like vegetables and it was like 0:47:51.480 --> 0:47:52.719 and then we'd make them for heat is I mean, 0:47:52.719 --> 0:47:55.400 I guess it's basically yeah, for heat is. Oh, but 0:47:55.480 --> 0:47:58.880 the chocolate shakes in Paradise, did you guys ever have 0:47:58.920 --> 0:48:02.320 some chocolate parent? Oh? My god, they were good stuff. 0:48:02.840 --> 0:48:05.560 I well, because you you you said Encelada's in it 0:48:05.640 --> 0:48:10.239 remind me that paradise. Uh the what was it? The 0:48:10.280 --> 0:48:13.880 case of dias there? God, they had a steak and 0:48:13.960 --> 0:48:16.200 cheese case of deal with guacamole on the side and 0:48:16.239 --> 0:48:23.160 it was just perfection. Anyway, pizza and the pizza was 0:48:23.200 --> 0:48:25.480 great to talcot Chakes. I'm so glad you reminded me. Anyway, 0:48:25.600 --> 0:48:27.600 we are dating podcast, so I guess we should talk 0:48:27.840 --> 0:48:30.120 about other things food, even though we talk about food 0:48:30.120 --> 0:48:34.040 all day. Obviously, Evan, you are known because you know 0:48:34.080 --> 0:48:36.200 on the show you were you were the e D guy. 0:48:36.520 --> 0:48:40.040 You were just the guy. But a rectile dysfunction is 0:48:40.040 --> 0:48:42.560 a very real thing. And uh so can you kind 0:48:42.560 --> 0:48:46.480 of tell us what e D exactly is? And uh, um, 0:48:47.400 --> 0:48:49.520 just kind of give us the overview of like who 0:48:49.520 --> 0:48:52.760 it affects at? What age does it mostly start affecting people? 0:48:53.480 --> 0:48:56.480 Uh and kind of the stress that's a along with 0:48:56.520 --> 0:49:00.800 it stigma. I'll just let you take it. Yeah, I 0:49:00.840 --> 0:49:03.600 mean I recall this function is basically the inability to 0:49:03.640 --> 0:49:07.840 get in direction enough to have sex. So it's pretty simple. Um, 0:49:08.040 --> 0:49:11.399 And I mean it affects just about every guy at 0:49:11.400 --> 0:49:13.560 some point in their life. I mean it's uh, it's 0:49:13.640 --> 0:49:17.600 really common. Obviously, affects guys more as they get older, 0:49:18.160 --> 0:49:21.239 but younger guys have it too. Um see a lot 0:49:21.280 --> 0:49:25.360 of younger guys, especially nowadays, uh, that that are suffering 0:49:25.400 --> 0:49:28.160 from it. Um. Usually with younger guys you know I'm 0:49:28.200 --> 0:49:30.400 talking and by younger, I mean like under forties, so 0:49:30.480 --> 0:49:34.839 like it's under forty is young to me still, so uh, 0:49:35.760 --> 0:49:39.600 those guys usually, um, you know, they end up not 0:49:39.680 --> 0:49:41.480 having it for for life or something. It can just 0:49:41.520 --> 0:49:43.200 be like an intermittent thing. I mean like you know 0:49:44.080 --> 0:49:46.400 people in college you drink too much and then you 0:49:46.400 --> 0:49:48.640 know you can't get it up cocaine and you're not 0:49:48.640 --> 0:49:50.480 gonna get get in direction after that, and a lot 0:49:50.520 --> 0:49:53.319 of times so um happens a lot to younger guys. 0:49:53.440 --> 0:49:55.960 The questions for you then you're definitely not a younger guy. 0:49:55.960 --> 0:49:57.680 All right, we do we all know that you're getting 0:49:57.760 --> 0:50:01.359 up there in age, you're kind of in uh, you're 0:50:01.360 --> 0:50:03.359 getting close to retirement whatever it is. How do you 0:50:03.520 --> 0:50:06.000 how do you keep the spice alive in your relationship? 0:50:06.040 --> 0:50:08.920 Then as an old man that's probably dealing with these 0:50:09.000 --> 0:50:18.960 chronic illnesses us not keeping it away. It's like insane, No, 0:50:20.520 --> 0:50:23.239 like that's just like the hardest thing ever. I mean, 0:50:23.280 --> 0:50:26.839 it's when you know, as soon as Isabella goes down, 0:50:26.840 --> 0:50:29.200 then Chuck Bass wakes back up, and then you know, 0:50:29.560 --> 0:50:31.719 then I've got a teenager who needs help with his 0:50:31.800 --> 0:50:34.160 freaking book report whould wait until last minute to do 0:50:34.239 --> 0:50:37.919 before summer reading. And so it's great, it's difficult. Yeah, yeah, 0:50:37.960 --> 0:50:41.480 but Evan, you are pumping out kids faster than freaking 0:50:41.560 --> 0:50:44.840 than bugs Bunny on Easter over there, so obviously that 0:50:44.880 --> 0:50:49.160 the Roman doesn't mark you're still there. Yeah, it's that's 0:50:49.200 --> 0:50:51.800 exactly right there. It just takes one shot, you know. 0:50:56.920 --> 0:50:59.960 But I'm curious because there is there is this stigma 0:51:00.440 --> 0:51:02.640 against the rectons. This function, and like you said, Evan, 0:51:02.920 --> 0:51:06.440 is very common. Um, but I've also heard this not 0:51:06.520 --> 0:51:09.360 only for men who feel insecure when they can't perform, 0:51:09.440 --> 0:51:13.879 but also females. Uh think that it's them that they're 0:51:14.080 --> 0:51:16.399 like if if a guy can't get it up, then 0:51:16.680 --> 0:51:21.000 a woman feels, oh my god, he's not attracted to me. Um. 0:51:21.040 --> 0:51:23.080 Obviously I don't think that's true, but maybe you can 0:51:23.120 --> 0:51:25.759 elaborate a little bit on that to make females who 0:51:25.760 --> 0:51:28.000 are listening to this right now, uh a little bit 0:51:28.040 --> 0:51:31.239 more comfortable letting them know that hey, if if a 0:51:31.239 --> 0:51:33.480 guy has rectile this function, it's not that he's not 0:51:33.520 --> 0:51:38.160 attracted to Yeah, it's crazy. I mean for guys, it's like, 0:51:38.280 --> 0:51:40.800 as long as it's warm and moist, it's fine. Sometimes 0:51:41.160 --> 0:51:43.800 it's just not moist, it's fine, Like it's not a 0:51:43.840 --> 0:51:47.359 big deal. So it's not it's usually not almost never 0:51:47.520 --> 0:51:50.920 is it's sexual attraction. Um. A lot of times, like 0:51:51.520 --> 0:51:54.680 I had a guy who um came to me and 0:51:54.680 --> 0:51:58.080 he was like, man, for a year, I've been starting 0:51:58.120 --> 0:52:02.839 fights with my wife, um because I can't get it up. 0:52:02.880 --> 0:52:05.400 And so at night before bed, I start fights and 0:52:05.440 --> 0:52:07.480 then I'll go sleep on the couch because I don't 0:52:07.480 --> 0:52:09.480 want to be putting that awkward position of having to 0:52:09.560 --> 0:52:13.360 like get it up when I know I can't. And so, um, 0:52:13.520 --> 0:52:17.839 guys are very um, you know, protective, our egos are 0:52:17.920 --> 0:52:22.360 very fragile around our member and so it's like a 0:52:22.440 --> 0:52:25.160 difficult thing to talk about. I mean, you know, it's 0:52:25.560 --> 0:52:27.359 and so a lot of times, you know, I don't 0:52:27.400 --> 0:52:29.520 know why women think it's them, but it's it's just 0:52:29.680 --> 0:52:32.160 it's just not like guys always want to have sex, 0:52:33.560 --> 0:52:35.239 and a lot of times if they don't, then it's 0:52:35.560 --> 0:52:39.120 there's something else going on. One thing I've noticed, and 0:52:39.120 --> 0:52:40.680 this might be Team I or maybe I've shared on 0:52:40.680 --> 0:52:43.560 the podcast before, I honestly don't know, is my sex 0:52:43.680 --> 0:52:48.400 drive strongly diminishes if I'm not like working out or 0:52:48.440 --> 0:52:51.120 like physically in shape. So after I broke my leg, 0:52:51.800 --> 0:52:54.520 my sex drive started depleting quite a bit, not because 0:52:54.560 --> 0:52:59.640 my leg was broken, but because I felt ending in 0:52:59.680 --> 0:53:02.640 my or so in my arms, like getting softer, and 0:53:02.680 --> 0:53:05.759 there were things like I was like, even, like Evan 0:53:05.840 --> 0:53:07.360 just said, I was like pretty down to myself. I 0:53:07.360 --> 0:53:09.080 was like, wow, like I'm not you know, I'm not 0:53:09.160 --> 0:53:11.080 like as vigorous as I used to be or to 0:53:11.120 --> 0:53:12.680 think that. But then I was like, well, it's probably 0:53:12.719 --> 0:53:14.960 because you feel like a fat piece and started for 0:53:15.000 --> 0:53:17.719 my language. But that's actually what that's that's where that's 0:53:17.760 --> 0:53:22.560 where I ended up. Yeah, totally, man. I mean anxiety 0:53:22.840 --> 0:53:27.799 and stress are um probably the number one cause of 0:53:27.960 --> 0:53:29.920 e D and young people. I don't know, that's not 0:53:29.960 --> 0:53:31.919 a medical fact, but that's I mean see that all 0:53:31.920 --> 0:53:34.360 the time where it's just like life is weighing on 0:53:34.400 --> 0:53:37.840 a guy or um, you know, yeah, you start to 0:53:37.880 --> 0:53:40.040 get that little paunch in your belly, you lose your 0:53:40.600 --> 0:53:44.120 self confidence and um, and then it's like, oh, I 0:53:44.120 --> 0:53:45.719 don't you know? Do I still got it? Am I 0:53:45.719 --> 0:53:49.160 still going to impress? Impress for or whatever? And and 0:53:49.320 --> 0:53:51.400 you know, it's it's tough. It's tough to come back. 0:53:51.520 --> 0:53:54.160 It's actually like this negative feedback loop. It sort of 0:53:54.200 --> 0:53:58.000 spirals down and it's like you have one bad encounter 0:53:58.080 --> 0:53:59.920 and you're like, oh my god, and then all the 0:54:00.040 --> 0:54:02.279 sadden it's like another about him. Am I gonna is 0:54:02.320 --> 0:54:04.239 the next time I go to have sex? Am I 0:54:04.280 --> 0:54:06.799 gonna like not be able to get up again? What's 0:54:06.800 --> 0:54:09.600 going to happen? So then then you kind of avoid it, 0:54:10.239 --> 0:54:11.960 and if it's not talked about, then it ends up 0:54:12.000 --> 0:54:13.920 being you know, kind of a big deal. A lot 0:54:13.920 --> 0:54:15.640 of guys would you go to the doctor and ask 0:54:15.680 --> 0:54:19.160 for pills or something if um, if they know and 0:54:19.200 --> 0:54:24.359 not tell they're their significant uh girlfriend, boyfriend whatever and um, 0:54:24.640 --> 0:54:26.919 and so yeah, they try to hide it and and 0:54:27.160 --> 0:54:30.440 sometimes that works, you know, but communication is always the 0:54:30.480 --> 0:54:34.279 best obviously. Um. So before you go out, and I 0:54:34.360 --> 0:54:36.239 did want to ask you, how do you think we 0:54:36.920 --> 0:54:42.439 can make talking about recton this function more normal? Because, 0:54:42.480 --> 0:54:44.480 like we talked about, it is very uncomfortable. It's hard 0:54:44.480 --> 0:54:46.399 to communicate it, especially as a guy, you can start 0:54:46.400 --> 0:54:49.200 feeling insecure. Um. And we actually just had Taylor Nolan 0:54:49.239 --> 0:54:51.680 on the podcast was becoming a sex therapist, which is 0:54:51.680 --> 0:54:54.719 incredible and she really wants to start normalizing just discussions 0:54:54.760 --> 0:54:57.359 about sex. Uh, so we can learn at a younger 0:54:57.400 --> 0:55:00.239 age about what sex really is. And so I guess 0:55:00.280 --> 0:55:03.239 my question is for you, Like I said, what do 0:55:03.320 --> 0:55:08.480 you suggest to make the discussion around erectile dysfunction more normalized? 0:55:10.200 --> 0:55:11.839 I think you get a joke about it. You gotta 0:55:11.880 --> 0:55:14.480 have fun with it. Um. You know, the memes are plentiful, 0:55:14.800 --> 0:55:17.839 the jokes are plumbing. I mean you just gotta like, um, 0:55:17.920 --> 0:55:20.080 you know, just kind of bring it around that way. 0:55:20.120 --> 0:55:23.040 And especially if you're gonna go if you suspect your 0:55:23.040 --> 0:55:24.440 guy might have e D or if he does have 0:55:24.480 --> 0:55:27.000 e D and he just doesn't want to talk about it, Um, 0:55:27.040 --> 0:55:29.160 you know, you gotta do like the Oreo approach, right, 0:55:29.200 --> 0:55:31.960 Like you gotta do the positive affirmation. I really love 0:55:31.960 --> 0:55:35.480 your dick. It's really beautiful and it's awesome. Um, but 0:55:35.600 --> 0:55:37.440 you know, like we should talk about like have like 0:55:37.520 --> 0:55:39.160 let's try some of this stuff that's out there and 0:55:39.200 --> 0:55:40.960 available that we can you know, mess around with and 0:55:41.000 --> 0:55:42.680 have fun, kind of make it sort of like a 0:55:42.680 --> 0:55:45.560 sex toy, but it's like but it's a viagara. And 0:55:45.600 --> 0:55:48.680 then I just I just love that, you know, like 0:55:48.719 --> 0:55:51.120 i'd love you, and I love the intimacy and all 0:55:51.120 --> 0:55:53.040 that stuff. So if you as long as you stroke 0:55:53.080 --> 0:55:56.360 a guy's ego, um, you know, you can usually no 0:55:56.400 --> 0:55:58.960 pun intended side. As long as you say you go, 0:55:59.080 --> 0:56:04.480 then you can usually um you know that. Uh. I 0:56:04.520 --> 0:56:06.760 was gonna make another joke, but I'm not gonna do. Uh. 0:56:07.280 --> 0:56:12.040 It loves the entry, so yeah, oh there we go. Man. Well, Evan, 0:56:12.239 --> 0:56:15.160 we really appreciate you coming on. We really appreciate you 0:56:15.360 --> 0:56:20.960 facing your your moral enemy, um Dean Anglert and uh 0:56:21.200 --> 0:56:23.839 it's always fun seeing you to interact and thank you 0:56:23.880 --> 0:56:27.359 for really, uh you know, talking about e D. Because 0:56:27.400 --> 0:56:29.880 I do think it's an important topic, uh and something 0:56:29.920 --> 0:56:32.040 that we should talk more about because like you said, 0:56:32.040 --> 0:56:36.840 it's pretty common. Yeah for sure. I love that. Alright, 0:56:36.880 --> 0:56:39.800 cool man, please give my love and all the kids. 0:56:40.920 --> 0:56:42.880 All right, well game, we can never talk to you again. Evan, 0:56:43.080 --> 0:56:46.840 thank you for whatever my life on Twitter, I'm just 0:56:46.840 --> 0:56:52.480 gonna keep going. I love it all right, by everybody, 0:56:52.719 --> 0:56:58.239 all right, see, I totally forgot about the the relationship 0:56:58.280 --> 0:57:01.800 that you guys had. God so good, Oh my god. Anyways, 0:57:01.800 --> 0:57:05.160 moving on from a very scorned and troubled relationship to 0:57:05.239 --> 0:57:10.800 a beautiful budding friendship. Um, we have a dating expert. 0:57:10.880 --> 0:57:14.320 We've had a lot of uh, you know, posers and 0:57:14.520 --> 0:57:19.120 infiltrators on the podcast, ourselves included, but we finally have 0:57:19.240 --> 0:57:22.600 an expert that's willing to help us answer some of 0:57:22.680 --> 0:57:26.600 these questions. Right, I think we I think, of course. 0:57:26.680 --> 0:57:29.920 Chris Tider's right here. He's Chris Cider. Everybody, lads and gentlemen. 0:57:29.960 --> 0:57:35.320 He is the host of the Ex Boyfriend Recovery Podcast, 0:57:35.360 --> 0:57:39.000 and you can get that wherever you listen to podcasts. Um, 0:57:39.040 --> 0:57:42.760 and is Chris Cider? Chris? How you doing, buddy? I'm 0:57:42.760 --> 0:57:45.360 doing well? Are you? I'm doing well? Man? Thank you 0:57:45.400 --> 0:57:47.120 so much for joining us. So this is our first 0:57:47.120 --> 0:57:51.240 ever live help by second dating podcast, obviously virtually, so 0:57:51.280 --> 0:57:54.280 I really appreciate you coming on, uh and and and 0:57:54.280 --> 0:57:57.720 talking all things relationships, which is obviously what your podcast 0:57:57.800 --> 0:58:00.400 is about as well. But I do love the title 0:58:00.680 --> 0:58:06.040 of your podcast, the Ex Boyfriend Recovery Podcast. Tell me 0:58:06.560 --> 0:58:11.400 what does that mean? Well? There's like two different meanings 0:58:11.480 --> 0:58:13.320 to it, right, So someone who wants to get their 0:58:13.320 --> 0:58:15.560 rex back can mean that, or someone who wants to 0:58:15.600 --> 0:58:17.760 recover from their breakup can mean that. So it's kind 0:58:17.800 --> 0:58:22.200 of playing with two birds one stone type mentality the 0:58:22.280 --> 0:58:24.040 ex boyfriend. I feel like there's a lot of women 0:58:24.080 --> 0:58:26.960 that are in this on this uh this live right 0:58:27.000 --> 0:58:29.600 now that are dealing with ex boyfriends. I feel like, 0:58:29.960 --> 0:58:33.160 as a guy and an ex boyfriend up until I 0:58:33.200 --> 0:58:36.240 obviously started dating and then married my wife, Uh, it's 0:58:36.280 --> 0:58:39.800 just like X has always come around. They never go away. 0:58:39.880 --> 0:58:42.800 Why is that? Is it just comfortableity? Is it because 0:58:42.800 --> 0:58:45.960 we already know what we're getting ourselves into. So what 0:58:46.080 --> 0:58:49.840 I've noticed is usually when you move on, they start 0:58:49.880 --> 0:58:52.800 to come back, which is sort of like this maybe 0:58:52.800 --> 0:58:55.360 concept of letting them go, and they're kind of like 0:58:55.800 --> 0:58:57.800 feeling a little bit of regret and they start to 0:58:57.920 --> 0:59:01.240 get romanticize the past the little bit, And I think 0:59:01.280 --> 0:59:04.000 that happens a lot, So that that's my take on it. 0:59:04.080 --> 0:59:06.640 I guess I feel like, as you're alluded to just 0:59:06.680 --> 0:59:09.640 a minute ago, as we've all kind of been in 0:59:09.680 --> 0:59:12.120 that situation where we've been an ex boyfriend. If you 0:59:12.120 --> 0:59:14.440 haven't been an ex boyfriend or a next girlfriend. I 0:59:14.440 --> 0:59:16.960 guess granted our listeners are probably must a female. Good 0:59:17.000 --> 0:59:20.360 for you, because I would say nine point nine percent 0:59:20.400 --> 0:59:22.320 of us have been a next at some point. And 0:59:22.360 --> 0:59:24.760 there's always these feelings of it. You're like, well, maybe 0:59:24.800 --> 0:59:26.720 I should just get back with my acts, Maybe I 0:59:26.760 --> 0:59:29.320 should give it another shot, maybe I didn't put my 0:59:30.080 --> 0:59:33.040 effort into it. And there's always like these lingering questions 0:59:33.080 --> 0:59:36.760 at like what if you know what I mean, Yeah, 0:59:36.840 --> 0:59:39.440 I think for sure that what if is kind of 0:59:39.480 --> 0:59:44.560 the cusp of everything you know, people feel. You know, 0:59:44.680 --> 0:59:47.400 they say that the like the third biggest regret in 0:59:47.440 --> 0:59:50.280 life is like not telling someone that you loved them, 0:59:50.280 --> 0:59:52.240 not taking your shots. So I feel like there's a 0:59:52.240 --> 0:59:55.120 lot of that going on with people who sort of 0:59:55.720 --> 1:00:01.120 romanticize the past after a certain amount of time. So 1:00:01.640 --> 1:00:04.320 from my own personal experience, and it's hard to explain, 1:00:04.360 --> 1:00:09.640 but my wife and I we never really were boyfriend girlfriend, 1:00:09.760 --> 1:00:11.960 but we kind of had a fling and then we 1:00:11.960 --> 1:00:14.200 were just friends for a long time and then we 1:00:14.200 --> 1:00:17.640 started dating and now we are married. So my question 1:00:17.760 --> 1:00:20.840 is a lot of people um get back with their 1:00:21.080 --> 1:00:24.880 X and then they're accused of settling. Uh, you know, 1:00:25.120 --> 1:00:28.000 they'll they'll they'll break up and then they'll move on 1:00:28.040 --> 1:00:30.280 and they get back and they're like, oh, you're settling 1:00:30.360 --> 1:00:32.120 for that person, You're going back. So my question is 1:00:33.120 --> 1:00:36.640 do you think that that's true? Um? Do you think 1:00:36.920 --> 1:00:39.760 that it's healthy to have a break up in a 1:00:39.760 --> 1:00:45.560 relationship and then come back together. So I think one 1:00:45.560 --> 1:00:47.720 of the most unhealthy type of behaviors I've seen is 1:00:47.720 --> 1:00:51.240 this on again, off again type situation people fall into 1:00:51.240 --> 1:00:52.959 where they break up and then they get back together 1:00:53.000 --> 1:00:55.240 and they break up again. And I find with people 1:00:55.280 --> 1:00:58.040 like that, the challenge really isn't getting their X back, 1:00:58.120 --> 1:01:01.000 it's more like keeping the relationship so you don't have 1:01:01.040 --> 1:01:05.400 that off again phase. And with regards to the settling, 1:01:05.600 --> 1:01:07.440 I think a lot of times the reason people do 1:01:07.480 --> 1:01:08.880 that is they have a bit of this grass is 1:01:08.920 --> 1:01:10.760 greener syndrome. So a lot of times when you go 1:01:10.800 --> 1:01:14.480 through a breakup, you're in this situation where you're thinking 1:01:14.520 --> 1:01:16.880 you can do better than the person you're with, and 1:01:16.920 --> 1:01:20.240 then sometimes that's not always proven true. And so I 1:01:20.240 --> 1:01:22.600 don't necessarily think the people who go back to their 1:01:22.720 --> 1:01:25.040 X is, at least in the moment, feel that they're settling. 1:01:25.800 --> 1:01:29.960 But maybe that's that stereotypical pressure coming from outside that 1:01:30.040 --> 1:01:33.320 creates the narrative that you're settling. That's I guess that's 1:01:33.360 --> 1:01:37.320 my take on it. Yeah, yeah, that's I mean. But 1:01:37.400 --> 1:01:40.640 the way that Chris speaks, it's very profound, and I 1:01:40.640 --> 1:01:43.520 I have no issue with agreeing everything that's, agreeing with 1:01:43.560 --> 1:01:46.280 everything that he's saying. But we do have some listener 1:01:46.360 --> 1:01:49.320 questions Chris that we want to get to. Um So 1:01:49.440 --> 1:01:52.240 Danielle wants to know why do people go to each 1:01:52.280 --> 1:01:55.160 other rather than say they're just not interested? What's your 1:01:55.200 --> 1:01:59.200 take on that? My take is they're afraid of the confrontation. 1:01:59.680 --> 1:02:03.040 You know, it's amazing what people do to avoid the confrontation. 1:02:03.080 --> 1:02:05.880 So it's sometimes just easier to cut them out completely. 1:02:06.040 --> 1:02:09.480 So the ghost and I think with the advent of texting, 1:02:09.800 --> 1:02:12.000 that is a lot more common now than it used 1:02:12.000 --> 1:02:13.640 to be, where you'd have to go take them on 1:02:13.680 --> 1:02:16.640 the day and just sort of have the talk. You know, well, 1:02:16.800 --> 1:02:19.680 you don't have to do that anymore. You have like 1:02:19.880 --> 1:02:22.640 simple like oh, just block their number, which is not 1:02:22.800 --> 1:02:25.040 the best way to treat someone, but you can see 1:02:25.040 --> 1:02:30.520 how convenient it is. I have a friend that's kind 1:02:30.560 --> 1:02:33.160 of going through a weird situation right now where they 1:02:33.400 --> 1:02:37.720 are with someone, but they're still talking to their ex, 1:02:38.560 --> 1:02:41.240 and while they want to be with the person they're 1:02:41.320 --> 1:02:44.919 dating right now, they're still harboring some feelings for their 1:02:44.960 --> 1:02:49.200 ex and they feel that it's They also feel so 1:02:49.320 --> 1:02:52.440 bad because the x ones like wants to get back 1:02:52.480 --> 1:02:55.120 together with them, So they feel like it's almost better 1:02:55.280 --> 1:02:58.680 to kind of try to be nice to them and 1:02:58.760 --> 1:03:01.320 communicate and not just completely shut things off, because they 1:03:01.320 --> 1:03:03.920 feel like that would be harsher than actually cutting off communication. 1:03:03.960 --> 1:03:06.080 Do you think that's true or do you think it's 1:03:06.080 --> 1:03:09.600 just best to completely cut off communication and give them 1:03:09.600 --> 1:03:12.600 the opportunity to move on with their life. I think 1:03:12.640 --> 1:03:14.760 it depends on the goal of the person. If you 1:03:14.760 --> 1:03:16.480 want to move on, I think it's best just to 1:03:16.520 --> 1:03:20.160 cut off communication to move on. Um, if you don't 1:03:20.200 --> 1:03:22.720 want to move on. One thing we know is that 1:03:23.080 --> 1:03:25.240 when you're in a relationship with someone else and you 1:03:25.280 --> 1:03:28.880 start talking to your ex a lot. If you're talking 1:03:28.920 --> 1:03:30.480 to your ex a lot, it is a sign that 1:03:30.520 --> 1:03:32.560 you're not as satisfied as you think in the current 1:03:32.600 --> 1:03:35.560 relationship you're in. I mean, it's like not rocket science, 1:03:35.600 --> 1:03:37.840 but you'd be kind of surprised at how little people 1:03:37.920 --> 1:03:42.960 realize that. So I'm wondering if maybe so if your friend, 1:03:43.080 --> 1:03:47.160 if he's or she, I don't know the situation exactly, 1:03:47.200 --> 1:03:51.440 but if she's or he's talking to their ex, I'm wondering, 1:03:51.760 --> 1:03:54.880 is it just out of being nice or you mentioned 1:03:54.880 --> 1:03:57.440 there's some unresolved feelings there, so maybe a bit of 1:03:57.480 --> 1:04:02.320 that grass is greener syndrome is happening to him. Yeah maybe. 1:04:02.360 --> 1:04:03.960 I mean I hate saying I'm not gonna say who 1:04:03.960 --> 1:04:06.040 it is, obviously, but like I hate saying it's like 1:04:06.080 --> 1:04:08.000 my friend, because then people would be like, oh, it's him, 1:04:08.080 --> 1:04:12.520 It's definitely not me. I'm happily married. But uh yeah, 1:04:12.680 --> 1:04:14.960 it's just uh. I was very curious about that. I mean, 1:04:15.000 --> 1:04:16.960 I've been through situations like that. I remember I was. 1:04:17.160 --> 1:04:20.240 I had a breakup years ago that it was just 1:04:20.320 --> 1:04:23.200 like we talked about one of those really bad long 1:04:23.640 --> 1:04:25.800 breakups because we dated for a while and it was 1:04:25.840 --> 1:04:28.320 kind of like on and off again, and you know, 1:04:28.400 --> 1:04:30.600 we would meet up because it's like, hey, I don't 1:04:30.640 --> 1:04:32.360 I still want you a part of my life, But 1:04:32.400 --> 1:04:34.640 then we'd meet up and then you know, hook up 1:04:34.680 --> 1:04:37.720 and it was just like this endless cycle and and uh, 1:04:37.760 --> 1:04:40.439 it wasn't healthy for either one of us really. But Dean, 1:04:40.480 --> 1:04:42.040 do you want to get back to the listener questions? 1:04:42.280 --> 1:04:44.120 Do you have another one? Yeah, so we have a 1:04:44.400 --> 1:04:46.880 we have another one from Martina who wants to know 1:04:46.960 --> 1:04:51.240 it does distance or time actually make the heart grow fonder? Chris? 1:04:51.240 --> 1:04:54.880 What do you think about that? Yes, time for sure 1:04:54.960 --> 1:04:56.760 can make the heart grow fonder, But I don't think 1:04:56.840 --> 1:04:59.439 it's just like so a lot of people talk about 1:04:59.440 --> 1:05:03.040 this concept playing hard to get, and that is psychologically 1:05:03.040 --> 1:05:06.640 proven to be effective. Yet I will say the aspect 1:05:06.720 --> 1:05:08.320 of playing hard to get is you have to at 1:05:08.400 --> 1:05:11.120 least engage in some type of communication. You know, it's 1:05:11.120 --> 1:05:13.960 sort of like the hot and cold type aspect. So 1:05:14.000 --> 1:05:17.120 I think distance can make the heart grow fonder and 1:05:17.520 --> 1:05:20.120 time can make the heart grow fonder if there's some 1:05:20.160 --> 1:05:23.800 type of communication being involved to make the person really 1:05:23.880 --> 1:05:28.520 satisfied in the interaction. So yes, But is one of 1:05:28.560 --> 1:05:31.919 those sort of answers to it, you know? There there's 1:05:31.920 --> 1:05:34.800 always kind of And to your point, I was gonna say, Uh, 1:05:35.480 --> 1:05:37.440 I've been playing hard to get with Kendall Jenner for 1:05:37.560 --> 1:05:40.760 quite a few years now and you're right about them 1:05:40.880 --> 1:05:42.720 having to know that you might be interested in the 1:05:42.800 --> 1:05:50.360 first place, I went and I went that. I mean, hey, listen, 1:05:50.400 --> 1:05:52.960 you know we've all got our celebrity crushes, all right. 1:05:53.560 --> 1:05:58.680 Fair enough, fair enough, my friend. UM, I have another 1:05:58.720 --> 1:06:00.720 I have another question for you. Do you think that, um, 1:06:01.480 --> 1:06:06.440 social media has more of a negative or positive effects 1:06:06.520 --> 1:06:11.120 on relationships and dating? I think it can be what 1:06:11.280 --> 1:06:13.080 you make it, because a lot of times on social media, 1:06:13.120 --> 1:06:15.960 I don't think people are putting themselves forward there, like 1:06:16.600 --> 1:06:18.600 you know, they're cropping pictures to make sure it's the 1:06:18.600 --> 1:06:21.160 best picture, the best version of themselves. I've I've heard 1:06:21.240 --> 1:06:24.520 some really horrible horror stories from people that I work 1:06:24.560 --> 1:06:27.280 with where they go on dates expecting, you know, the 1:06:27.440 --> 1:06:29.919 the dating profile picture to be exactly who they get 1:06:29.960 --> 1:06:32.520 on the on the date, and it's not at all. 1:06:32.600 --> 1:06:35.800 So I think there's that element. I think if you 1:06:35.920 --> 1:06:38.520 use it effectively, it can be really a powerful tool, 1:06:38.640 --> 1:06:43.360 especially in today's dating environment. But I do see some 1:06:43.480 --> 1:06:47.720 negative aspects to it, especially we're kind of living more 1:06:47.760 --> 1:06:49.640 of our lives, especially now more than ever with the 1:06:49.720 --> 1:06:52.600 quarantine digitally as opposed to just being in the moment 1:06:52.720 --> 1:06:56.400 and kind of enjoying each other's company in person. So 1:06:57.840 --> 1:07:00.520 we've all been single at some point in our lives, 1:07:00.560 --> 1:07:04.000 especially with Instagram around and whenever you would like find 1:07:04.000 --> 1:07:06.120 a girl attractive or q on Instagram and you wanted 1:07:06.160 --> 1:07:08.200 to like maybe get to know the more and slide 1:07:08.200 --> 1:07:11.560 into the vms or whatever. What I found out, what 1:07:11.760 --> 1:07:15.960 the practice that I incorporated later on was pictures, as 1:07:16.040 --> 1:07:18.080 Chris said, are one thing. They can be highly doctored, 1:07:18.120 --> 1:07:20.480 highly edited. Whatever. I would always look for, like the 1:07:20.600 --> 1:07:22.320 videos that they have on their feet, and if there 1:07:22.400 --> 1:07:24.880 was like a video of them, even just like a 1:07:24.920 --> 1:07:26.800 selfie video of them doing something, you can get a 1:07:26.880 --> 1:07:29.720 much clearer image of who the person is going to be. 1:07:30.160 --> 1:07:32.280 Not only because of it you can't doctor a video 1:07:32.360 --> 1:07:34.520 quite as much, but they're like their mannerisms are obviously 1:07:34.600 --> 1:07:38.240 much more apparent in those videos, you know what I mean. Well, well, 1:07:38.560 --> 1:07:41.000 what's interesting is that you bring up the video thing. 1:07:41.040 --> 1:07:42.959 That's something I've seen a lot of success with because 1:07:43.000 --> 1:07:47.360 of the seven thirty five rule, which basically is talking 1:07:47.400 --> 1:07:51.800 about how we perceive communication. Seven percent of how we 1:07:51.880 --> 1:07:56.200 perceive communication is words, thirty eight percent is a tone 1:07:56.200 --> 1:08:00.960 of voice, in fifty is body language. With videos, you're 1:08:01.040 --> 1:08:03.480 kind of engaging all of that aspect versus just like 1:08:03.800 --> 1:08:10.800 the d M s, you're just texting back and forth essentially. Yeah, 1:08:10.880 --> 1:08:13.560 I remember heard the seven five yeld But that that 1:08:13.600 --> 1:08:15.520 makes that makes a lot of sense with something we're 1:08:15.520 --> 1:08:17.639 going to store away in the memory banks, all right. 1:08:17.720 --> 1:08:19.559 Chris Becky wants to know how do you get out 1:08:19.560 --> 1:08:23.479 of the talking stage, which even probably is more challenging 1:08:23.520 --> 1:08:26.360 now during COVID because all we have to do is 1:08:26.400 --> 1:08:28.360 sit around and talk on our phones, but we can't 1:08:28.439 --> 1:08:31.080 quite meet up as often. So what do you recommend 1:08:31.160 --> 1:08:32.200 for the people that are trying to get out of 1:08:32.240 --> 1:08:36.400 the talking stage. I think trying to, you know, put 1:08:36.400 --> 1:08:39.400 the seven will into practice where you're not just texting, 1:08:39.400 --> 1:08:42.160 because I'm assuming what she says talking, she's just texting 1:08:42.200 --> 1:08:45.200 back and forth, back and forth. Maybe sliding a video 1:08:45.400 --> 1:08:47.960 entering a video chat, doing something of that nature to 1:08:48.120 --> 1:08:50.160 sort of spice things up a little bit might be 1:08:50.200 --> 1:08:55.120 a good route to go. I I agree that there's 1:08:55.120 --> 1:08:58.000 gotta be like, uh, there's gotta be like a thing 1:08:58.720 --> 1:09:00.720 to have, Like there has to be I don't I 1:09:00.720 --> 1:09:03.960 guess like a like a like a an idea where 1:09:04.000 --> 1:09:06.599 you're not like just like, let's stop talking, let's moving forward. 1:09:06.680 --> 1:09:10.080 You have to like basically not like Aggamon, but like 1:09:10.160 --> 1:09:12.720 create an event or some sort to like coax them 1:09:12.720 --> 1:09:15.599 into being more comfortable with the idea of like progressing 1:09:15.640 --> 1:09:17.920 past talking stage. You know what I mean. Like, let's 1:09:17.960 --> 1:09:19.920 say you go like an inside joke where you both 1:09:20.040 --> 1:09:22.559 love bunt cakes. You're like, let's go get a bunt 1:09:22.600 --> 1:09:24.639 cake together, you know what I mean, Like, there's gonna 1:09:24.640 --> 1:09:26.160 be like, in my opinion, there's got to be like 1:09:26.280 --> 1:09:30.400 some event or some moment that's like very essential to 1:09:30.479 --> 1:09:34.720 any progression of a relationship. And asked the stem from 1:09:34.760 --> 1:09:39.040 something early on in the talking stage. I think one 1:09:39.080 --> 1:09:41.679 thing I tell my clients is, like, what you want 1:09:41.680 --> 1:09:44.880 are virgin ground topics, Like you want to get so 1:09:44.960 --> 1:09:47.200 in depth in a conversation with that person that they're 1:09:47.240 --> 1:09:50.040 talking to you about things that they've never told anyone 1:09:50.080 --> 1:09:54.559 else before. Um, And certainly I don't think you know 1:09:54.640 --> 1:09:57.000 the inside jokes what you're talking about is kind of 1:09:57.040 --> 1:09:59.080 an important aspect as well, But I think you need 1:09:59.120 --> 1:10:00.600 to kind of if you if you're stuck on the 1:10:00.640 --> 1:10:03.160 talking stage, my guess is you're not talking about ideas, 1:10:03.160 --> 1:10:06.200 You're talking about people or events in Great Minds always 1:10:06.240 --> 1:10:14.840 talk about ideas out bunt cake ideas, bunts. If we're 1:10:14.840 --> 1:10:17.640 gonna leave you with one thing on this podcast, it 1:10:17.760 --> 1:10:21.559 is bunt cake ideas. You want to know what's funny, 1:10:21.560 --> 1:10:23.679 As I said, I said bunt cakes. And the reason 1:10:23.680 --> 1:10:25.240 that I said bunt cakes was because there was this 1:10:25.280 --> 1:10:27.600 girl in college but I had a huge crush on 1:10:27.720 --> 1:10:30.719 that worked at a bunt cake shop and I would 1:10:30.760 --> 1:10:33.320 often use bunt cakes as an excuse to like, go 1:10:33.400 --> 1:10:36.519 see here, So I was like drawn from some some 1:10:36.600 --> 1:10:40.960 passive label. You've labeled that experience the bunt cake thing. 1:10:41.080 --> 1:10:44.960 So it's like any kind of cake. Yeah, okay, I 1:10:45.040 --> 1:10:49.599 like it, yeah exactly. And everyone that's listening is feel 1:10:49.640 --> 1:10:51.960 free to to steal that. And and I want to 1:10:51.960 --> 1:10:54.000 point out it was effective, but we did date for 1:10:54.000 --> 1:10:57.559 a little bit, obviously long term, not quite as effective, 1:10:57.600 --> 1:11:00.479 but we were able to explore relationship and realize that 1:11:00.520 --> 1:11:03.519 it wasn't for us. So the bunk cake works to 1:11:03.600 --> 1:11:05.840 get the girl but not keep the girl, essentially, is 1:11:05.880 --> 1:11:08.400 what you're saying. Well, there's gotta be more than just 1:11:08.439 --> 1:11:15.120 partakes as a foundation for relationship, right right right? Um, Chris, 1:11:15.120 --> 1:11:17.000 you're the man we appreciate you coming on the podcast. 1:11:17.040 --> 1:11:20.559 Thank you for sharing your wise words. Um and Jared 1:11:20.560 --> 1:11:22.639 pointed out you have a podcast as well. Please feel 1:11:22.640 --> 1:11:24.000 free to shore that with the listeners and we'll be 1:11:24.040 --> 1:11:25.519 sure to check it out as well. What's the most 1:11:25.560 --> 1:11:29.719 name of the podcast? Yeah, it's simple Ex Boyfriend Recovery Podcast. 1:11:29.760 --> 1:11:32.320 You can get it wherever the podcast live. You know 1:11:32.360 --> 1:11:37.680 iTunes that you're Spotify, love it. You're the man. We 1:11:37.680 --> 1:11:39.679 appreciate you coming in. We appreciate you sharing your wisdom 1:11:39.720 --> 1:11:41.519 with us. Than We'll be sure to check that out. 1:11:43.320 --> 1:11:48.360 See you. What about Yeah, Jared, right now there were 1:11:48.400 --> 1:11:52.280 to to co hosts co hosting a podcast, as co 1:11:52.439 --> 1:11:55.160 hosts do for a podcast. We saw Ashley and a 1:11:55.160 --> 1:11:58.720 little puppy dog making appearance just the second. Well, this 1:11:58.760 --> 1:12:00.400 is not my puppy dog. This is food sheet. Oh 1:12:00.439 --> 1:12:03.360 come here, Fushi. So this is Fushi. This is Crystal's 1:12:03.760 --> 1:12:09.320 dog es. Do you guys love your multipoos? Look look 1:12:09.320 --> 1:12:12.240 at this ship too? Is this like a Rhode Island 1:12:12.280 --> 1:12:14.559 thing to be obsessed with? These kinds of little dogs 1:12:14.560 --> 1:12:17.000 that you guys all have. Look at this little bit. 1:12:17.040 --> 1:12:20.320 Oh dude, you have Pappy. Pappy's a small dog. You 1:12:20.360 --> 1:12:23.680 can see up the obsession. I agree, but you have 1:12:24.080 --> 1:12:25.680 you have a very similar you have two of the 1:12:25.680 --> 1:12:28.760 same dog. Your parents have a similar dog. Crystal's got 1:12:28.760 --> 1:12:30.600 the dog the doora wile. Don't get me wrong. It 1:12:30.600 --> 1:12:32.200 looks at little walk. It looks like it's supposed to 1:12:32.200 --> 1:12:37.280 be running around tattooing or something. But it's yeah, yeah, 1:12:37.320 --> 1:12:39.400 I would say more you are, but that's that's just 1:12:39.520 --> 1:12:43.720 you know, beauty disagree. Anyways, first live podcast, dude, I'm 1:12:43.720 --> 1:12:45.600 gonna say it was a success, even though there's a 1:12:45.600 --> 1:12:48.200 little bit of a lag time between saying and hearing 1:12:48.439 --> 1:12:51.160 and speaking. It's like I can talk over each other 1:12:51.320 --> 1:12:56.200 that but we do have some questions from our from 1:12:56.200 --> 1:12:59.880 our listeners. They're pressing and they want to know some things. 1:13:00.080 --> 1:13:02.920 So let's ask a couple of questions amongst each other. 1:13:03.000 --> 1:13:05.920 So this one's from Eliza. She says, who's your bigger 1:13:05.960 --> 1:13:08.360 man crush, Mike Johnson or Tyler See? And I think 1:13:08.400 --> 1:13:10.400 this applies to both of us, And I think I 1:13:10.400 --> 1:13:12.240 know your answer before you're gonna say, You're gonna say 1:13:12.280 --> 1:13:17.760 Mike Johnson because we had and he is dreaming, And yeah, 1:13:17.800 --> 1:13:20.200 I'm gonna say Mike Johnson. Just because, like I said before, 1:13:20.280 --> 1:13:23.920 he reminds me of of of Will Smith and Bad Boys, 1:13:23.920 --> 1:13:26.080 who's like Mike Larry, one of my favorite movie character 1:13:26.360 --> 1:13:34.240 of all time. So John, I'm gonna say Mike Johnson too, 1:13:34.280 --> 1:13:36.320 which is crazy for me because we all know I've 1:13:36.320 --> 1:13:39.120 got a big man crush on Tyler See, but huge. 1:13:39.240 --> 1:13:44.000 I will say. I'm working on um focusing more on 1:13:44.320 --> 1:13:46.120 the things that I do know about people rather than 1:13:46.120 --> 1:13:48.000 things I don't know about people. And I don't know 1:13:48.040 --> 1:13:49.799 Tyler See, so I put him on this big pedestal. 1:13:50.360 --> 1:13:53.280 He's probably gonna disappoint me. And because of that, Mike 1:13:53.360 --> 1:13:56.280 Johnson all the way. What other questions do we have, 1:13:56.400 --> 1:13:59.280 Jared that we can answer right now? I actually can't 1:13:59.320 --> 1:14:01.280 read the chats, So do you mind reading the questions? 1:14:01.320 --> 1:14:05.200 It's all blurry to me. Yeah, I would be happy 1:14:05.240 --> 1:14:07.960 to the WiFi that I'm stealing from the hotel allows 1:14:07.960 --> 1:14:11.160 me to read the chat and your own your crystals 1:14:11.160 --> 1:14:14.920 WiFi doesn't like to you, all right. This one's from Brielle. 1:14:15.000 --> 1:14:17.639 Brielle wants to know, similar to what we asked Evan, 1:14:17.800 --> 1:14:22.840 what is your cheesecake factory order? Jared? Uh, you know, 1:14:23.040 --> 1:14:25.760 I Eastern is gonna really hate me for this one. 1:14:26.000 --> 1:14:28.880 I don't go to the cheesecake factory all that much. 1:14:29.360 --> 1:14:32.840 I mean, listen, I am all for cheesecake factory. I'm 1:14:32.880 --> 1:14:38.080 all for chain restaurants, Big Friday's, Guy, Apple, Applebee's, Chili's, 1:14:38.200 --> 1:14:42.519 cheesecake Factory, I'm all in. But you know, I guess 1:14:42.600 --> 1:14:45.320 i'd probably say, you know, chicken fingers and fry, something 1:14:45.439 --> 1:14:50.479 something easy, something traditional, something tasty. It's pretty basic. And 1:14:50.520 --> 1:14:52.960 I will say Eastern are one of our producers of 1:14:52.960 --> 1:14:55.200 those podcasts listening to this and judging both of us 1:14:55.320 --> 1:14:57.840 very hard for answers right now. And I'm also going 1:14:57.880 --> 1:14:59.800 to give a very uninspired I'm gonna give it an 1:15:00.040 --> 1:15:05.680 inspired answer. I think my go to UH is I 1:15:05.680 --> 1:15:07.640 can't remember if this take practory somewhere else, but the 1:15:07.680 --> 1:15:13.960 barbecue chicken salad is very very good, delicious east And 1:15:14.000 --> 1:15:17.760 the reason we're referencing Easton because Eastern travels around the 1:15:17.800 --> 1:15:21.240 country and goes to different cheesecake factories. I think he's 1:15:21.240 --> 1:15:25.160 been to like thirty different cheesecake batories, if not more. 1:15:25.360 --> 1:15:28.160 I I might be low balling that. I'm not sure. Honestly, 1:15:29.840 --> 1:15:33.240 very very very impressive on Eastan's part. All right, this 1:15:33.280 --> 1:15:36.599 one's frown Terrence, Terrence, thanks for asking a question. Uh, 1:15:36.800 --> 1:15:38.760 they want to know what do you guys think of 1:15:38.800 --> 1:15:41.240 the whole bachelor atte switch? And we talked about this 1:15:41.280 --> 1:15:44.040 a little bit just the other day when we didn't 1:15:44.040 --> 1:15:48.840 any last weekly. Uh, they're allegedly was a switch from 1:15:48.840 --> 1:15:52.560 Claire Crawley as bachelorette over to Tasia Adams is the bachelorette, 1:15:52.960 --> 1:15:56.840 which was operating on that assumption, Jared, because I know 1:15:57.000 --> 1:15:59.439 you you've been to Laquinta. You can't divulge anything, but 1:15:59.520 --> 1:16:02.439 operating the assumption that we went from Claire to Taitia. 1:16:03.280 --> 1:16:05.960 What are your opinions on that. I know, I know 1:16:06.080 --> 1:16:09.680 things that you guys don't and I still don't know 1:16:10.360 --> 1:16:13.360 because they don't tell me anything. Uh, as you know, 1:16:14.040 --> 1:16:15.960 you know the room, and they're like, all right, well 1:16:15.960 --> 1:16:18.160 we'll tell you what you need to know and then 1:16:19.040 --> 1:16:22.200 tell you nothing of that. I would say, listen, I 1:16:22.240 --> 1:16:30.080 love Cla. Claire is a badass, per woman who's stunning, uh, 1:16:30.120 --> 1:16:35.360 and I think she will make an incredible bachelorette. And 1:16:35.479 --> 1:16:38.160 if the rumors are true and Tastia is the bachelorette 1:16:38.200 --> 1:16:42.839 as well, Tassia is another badass woman who is stunning 1:16:43.400 --> 1:16:47.479 and kind hearted and someone that both Ashley and myself 1:16:47.520 --> 1:16:50.880 are big fans of, just like Claire. Uh. And so 1:16:51.040 --> 1:16:54.120 if there's an opportunity for both these women to find love, 1:16:54.720 --> 1:17:00.479 I'm all in, like, let's do it. I to watch 1:17:00.560 --> 1:17:04.320 them both fall in love, that'd be great. It's so 1:17:04.360 --> 1:17:06.479 weird though, because like they're and this is you know, 1:17:06.520 --> 1:17:09.720 all over the news circuit as well. US Weekly like 1:17:09.800 --> 1:17:13.080 posted photos of of Claire and Chris Harrison filming something 1:17:13.080 --> 1:17:17.320 the other day. So Claire is still down there filming, 1:17:17.800 --> 1:17:21.600 So who the hell knows what is going on? But 1:17:21.720 --> 1:17:23.040 you know, I give them all the props in the 1:17:23.040 --> 1:17:25.000 world because, like we've said this before. I know Fushi, 1:17:25.040 --> 1:17:28.559 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Fush's whining right now. Uh. He's 1:17:28.680 --> 1:17:31.519 very concerned about why these things are in my ears. Uh. 1:17:31.560 --> 1:17:35.360 And I'm talking to a computer by myself. Um listen, 1:17:35.520 --> 1:17:38.880 I I just say, they always top themselves. It's unbelievable. 1:17:38.880 --> 1:17:41.400 It's freaking show. Like just when you think that they 1:17:41.439 --> 1:17:43.479 peak and it's like, wow, they can't get any better 1:17:43.520 --> 1:17:49.360 than that boom they got better than that. Well better 1:17:49.520 --> 1:17:54.920 better is a subjective word, all right, One quick. Last 1:17:55.040 --> 1:17:58.559 year has actually been east has been the thirty two 1:17:58.640 --> 1:18:03.240 cheesecake factories not thirty very easy to make, and I 1:18:03.280 --> 1:18:05.760 just don't want I don't want easton you were I 1:18:05.760 --> 1:18:06.960 don't want easy to come back to us and be 1:18:07.040 --> 1:18:09.240 like listen, guys at the thirty two. So so Eason 1:18:09.320 --> 1:18:12.200 has been a thirty two different chieh take factories very impressive. 1:18:12.200 --> 1:18:14.559 And in the last final question before we wrap up 1:18:14.560 --> 1:18:19.240 our final final, I'm sorry, first ever live podcast it 1:18:19.320 --> 1:18:21.519 might be quickly because I don't know the answer. But Jared, 1:18:21.560 --> 1:18:27.200 do you know the answer of who Nick Vial is dating? Uh? 1:18:27.400 --> 1:18:34.519 I mean that's a question, Damn I do uh kind 1:18:34.600 --> 1:18:37.479 of I'm certainly not saying it here. Uh if he 1:18:37.560 --> 1:18:42.439 is dating someone? Uh, you know. I mean, so you 1:18:42.560 --> 1:18:44.519 do know who he's dating, but you don't know if 1:18:44.520 --> 1:18:47.680 he's dating someone. I don't know. I love Nick, but 1:18:48.280 --> 1:18:51.160 he doesn't share his personal romantic life with me as 1:18:51.200 --> 1:18:54.120 often as he might have used to. I don't know, dude, 1:18:54.120 --> 1:18:56.240 but he also doesn't share with anybody like that. Guy 1:18:56.280 --> 1:18:59.320 plays things so close to the chest, like things that 1:18:59.400 --> 1:19:01.280 just don't need to be played close to the chest, 1:19:01.320 --> 1:19:04.519 you know what I mean. It's like bro just freaking 1:19:04.880 --> 1:19:12.200 tell me, and he's like, oh, I don't know. I 1:19:12.280 --> 1:19:15.719 just hope that guy is happy. I really do. He's like, dude, 1:19:15.760 --> 1:19:17.800 he truly is, like I know I always is, but 1:19:17.840 --> 1:19:19.719 he's like the closest thing I have to a brother, 1:19:19.800 --> 1:19:23.000 because like there are times man where I'm like, dude, 1:19:23.439 --> 1:19:25.320 what do you Why are you being such a dick 1:19:25.479 --> 1:19:27.920 right now? And then I'm like, but I also love you. 1:19:28.040 --> 1:19:31.520 So it's like it's like that brotherly type of relationship. 1:19:32.040 --> 1:19:35.040 And uh, I'm I'm on such like a comfortable level 1:19:35.040 --> 1:19:39.080 with Nick right now. I really enjoy it because I 1:19:38.800 --> 1:19:41.120 I used to be intimidated by him, like I would 1:19:41.120 --> 1:19:43.719 never say what I actually meant, even when we started 1:19:43.760 --> 1:19:46.880 becoming friends. Uh, and now I just say whatever is 1:19:46.880 --> 1:19:48.920 on my mind, and I've I found that it's really 1:19:48.960 --> 1:19:52.559 helped our friendship. I love it. I love it. Well, 1:19:52.560 --> 1:19:54.680 since you want to share who he's dating, we can 1:19:54.760 --> 1:19:57.760 only speculate. Uh So I guess we'll just continue to 1:19:57.800 --> 1:20:00.120 speculate anyways. That's gonna do it for a first ever 1:20:00.280 --> 1:20:02.560 live help I suck at dating. I know that we 1:20:02.600 --> 1:20:06.320 wanted to be under different circumstances where we could actually 1:20:06.360 --> 1:20:09.599 have an auditorium filled with thousands and thousands of our 1:20:09.640 --> 1:20:13.080 fans and listeners and um bring people on stage and 1:20:13.160 --> 1:20:16.000 throw parties and take fireball shots and all these things 1:20:16.000 --> 1:20:21.240 that we've dreamed of doing every single night since. But 1:20:21.320 --> 1:20:24.280 for now, this is all we got. And honestly, I 1:20:24.320 --> 1:20:26.760 had a great time. I hope you guys listening and 1:20:26.760 --> 1:20:29.160 watching had a great time as well. Big thank you 1:20:29.200 --> 1:20:35.320 to Mike Johnson, Taylor Nolan, and Chris Uh Chris as well. 1:20:35.360 --> 1:20:37.720 I don't think I'm forgetting anyone, am I. Anyways, it 1:20:37.760 --> 1:20:44.400 doesn't matter getting anyone, Because I almost said it too, 1:20:44.479 --> 1:20:48.160 I was almost like, wait a minute. Big thank you 1:20:48.200 --> 1:20:51.880 to Evan Passable for joining us and being a guest 1:20:51.880 --> 1:20:55.719 on our podcast. He's he's very charismatic and handsome uh 1:20:55.800 --> 1:20:59.800 digitally as well, So big thank you to you, Deane 1:21:00.000 --> 1:21:04.200 are always being a handsome, wonderful person you are and 1:21:04.240 --> 1:21:08.439 really just carrying this podcast. Uh. And I truly mean that. 1:21:08.600 --> 1:21:11.800 I'm I'm confident in uh in my ability, but you 1:21:11.840 --> 1:21:14.400 are truly the talent my friend, and I have no 1:21:14.520 --> 1:21:18.160 quarrel like that. I really don't. Thank you to all 1:21:18.200 --> 1:21:22.120 the listeners. Thank you to everybody who tuned in, who 1:21:22.160 --> 1:21:25.400 bought tickets. Like the idea that you guys paid money, 1:21:26.240 --> 1:21:32.799 uh to be with us is something UH that's awesome 1:21:33.080 --> 1:21:36.280 and uh, I just can't tell you how how grateful 1:21:36.320 --> 1:21:39.840 we are for that. Um and uh hopefully we'll move 1:21:39.880 --> 1:21:41.840 back at studio at some point soon. I felt like 1:21:41.840 --> 1:21:44.080 we're really catching our groove. Man. We were headed for 1:21:44.120 --> 1:21:46.720 that People's Choice award. I actually so I ate hidese food. 1:21:46.760 --> 1:21:49.080 Tonight got a fortune cookie that said I was gonna 1:21:49.160 --> 1:21:51.840 win an award soon, and the first thing that went 1:21:51.920 --> 1:21:55.280 my mind was, like People's Choice Awards, help us suck 1:21:55.320 --> 1:21:58.240 a dating best live podcast. It's coming up. I I 1:21:58.320 --> 1:22:00.280 can feel it in my blood. I do. I have 1:22:00.360 --> 1:22:03.120 one more big thank you, and that is to the 1:22:03.280 --> 1:22:06.759 Grand Canyon in for letting me park in their parking 1:22:06.800 --> 1:22:08.880 lot and steal the WiFi for the past hour and 1:22:08.880 --> 1:22:11.679 a half. I think thank you for not even knowing 1:22:11.720 --> 1:22:15.960 that Dean was there. I'm like a full incognito mode 1:22:16.000 --> 1:22:19.000 where like the I belt, like the blinds down and 1:22:19.120 --> 1:22:20.760 so like no one can see end of the van, 1:22:21.320 --> 1:22:23.880 but I can, you know, obviously, still operate and function 1:22:24.000 --> 1:22:26.760 appropriately and properly. I didn't think that this wife I 1:22:26.840 --> 1:22:29.439 was gonna being kick Kaitlyn out of the van while 1:22:29.479 --> 1:22:32.519 you recorded this is she just like sitting outside. Well, 1:22:32.560 --> 1:22:35.040 so we're actually staying in a hotel tonight under canvas 1:22:35.040 --> 1:22:37.160 Grand Canyon, and it's like ten minutes away. And I 1:22:37.200 --> 1:22:39.000 was just like, you know what, I just stay here 1:22:39.000 --> 1:22:40.880 with copy, takes some photos and I'm gonna be on 1:22:40.960 --> 1:22:43.000 for an hour and a half. Well, me and suck 1:22:43.160 --> 1:22:45.519 Army changed the world. And she was like, yeah, that's 1:22:45.560 --> 1:22:51.360 totally fine. Uh So Jesus, she's back sitting in the 1:22:51.479 --> 1:22:53.080 in the TP that we're staying in for the next 1:22:53.120 --> 1:22:56.920 couple of nights. But anyways, that's gonna do it for 1:22:57.040 --> 1:22:59.839 this episode of Help I Suck at Dating. Every episode 1:22:59.840 --> 1:23:01.479 gets better and better. Jared, I love you so much. 1:23:01.520 --> 1:23:05.280 This is fantastic. Uh. To our listeners and to our 1:23:05.439 --> 1:23:07.800 to our watchers, thank you guys for tuning in. As 1:23:07.880 --> 1:23:10.720 Jared said, if you paid the ten dollars, great, If 1:23:10.720 --> 1:23:12.960 you paid the thirty dollars, I hope you enjoy your beanie. 1:23:13.120 --> 1:23:15.240 I should have worn mine and that was just bad 1:23:15.439 --> 1:23:18.880 marketing on my point. But thank you so much for 1:23:18.920 --> 1:23:20.840 tuning in. Be sure to tune next week because maybe 1:23:20.880 --> 1:23:23.240 we'll all suck just a little bit less. Follow help 1:23:23.320 --> 1:23:26.360 by suck at Dating on I Heart Radio or wherever 1:23:26.439 --> 1:23:27.440 you listen to podcast