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Speaker 1: Time now for today's Strawberry Letter. And if you need

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Speaker 1: advice on relationships, work, dating, sex, parenting, and more. Please

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Speaker 1: submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVFM dot com and

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Speaker 1: click submit Strawberry Letter.

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Speaker 2: We could be reading your.

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Speaker 1: Letter live on the air, just like we're going to

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Speaker 1: read this one right here, right now.

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Speaker 3: Buggle up, hold on tight. We got it for you.

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Speaker 2: Here.

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Speaker 3: It is the Strawberry Letter.

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Speaker 4: Thank you.

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Speaker 1: Nephew's subject. I don't know my husband at all, Dear

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Speaker 1: Stephen Shirley. I am an older married woman and this

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Speaker 1: is my second marriage.

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Speaker 2: When I met my.

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Speaker 1: Husband, he was extremely handsome and generous. We connected spiritually

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Speaker 1: and he joined my church. We didn't court for long,

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Speaker 1: and he said he knew I was his soulmate the

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Speaker 1: minute we met. I knew things could be going too

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Speaker 1: fast because I'm his third wife, but I felt the

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Speaker 1: same connection to him, so I agreed to marry him.

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Speaker 1: Only five people came to our wedding, and they were

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Speaker 1: all my family. None of his children or family members came.

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Speaker 1: My two daughters thought we were rushing into this since

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Speaker 1: I had only known him for eight months. And I

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Speaker 1: told him how they felt, and he snapped back and said,

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Speaker 1: my grown daughters need to stay out of our business.

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Speaker 2: On our wedding night, we had sex and.

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Speaker 1: It was just okay, so I figured it would get

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Speaker 1: better with time. It has not, because we haven't had

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Speaker 1: sex since we got married three months ago. He does

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Speaker 1: not go to church anymore, and on Sunday mornings he

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Speaker 1: goes to the casino with his brother. When I asked

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Speaker 1: him about wasting money, he said he has extra money

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Speaker 1: because my house is paid for and all he has

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Speaker 1: to pay is utilities, so it's not a waste of money.

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Speaker 1: I asked him why we don't have sex, and he

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Speaker 1: said it's not a woman's place to do the chasing.

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Speaker 1: So I need to be patient and let him come

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Speaker 1: on to me. If I asked him anything, I get

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Speaker 1: that kind of response, and his mouth is so reckless

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Speaker 1: that I go for days without talking to him. My

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Speaker 1: daughters do not like him and think I should get

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Speaker 1: my marriage annulled.

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Speaker 2: I am not ready to give up on him.

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Speaker 1: On the bright side, he cooks dinner every day and

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Speaker 1: he keeps the house clean. We live his roommates, not

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Speaker 1: his husband and wife. What has happened to the man

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Speaker 1: I'm married? Well, this is him this is who you married.

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Speaker 1: This is who you married. You just weren't with him

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Speaker 1: long enough to get to know him, to find out

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Speaker 1: this other part. I know this is not what you

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Speaker 1: signed up for. You say you're not ready to give

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Speaker 1: up on him, But what are you waiting on? You say,

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Speaker 1: he talks to you crazy, He goes to the casino

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Speaker 1: on Sunday, loses money after only three months, he's already

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Speaker 1: given up on you and the marriage.

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Speaker 2: You get no sex.

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Speaker 1: You're right, and you don't know your husband at all

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Speaker 1: because you never met him. The guy you met was

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Speaker 1: a representative who you know, the generous one going to

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Speaker 1: church with you, you all connected spiritually and all that.

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Speaker 1: The one who had sex with you one time, and

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Speaker 1: that was on your wedding. You say that was all

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Speaker 1: in the beginning. But and he was definitely not your soulmate.

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Speaker 2: Okay.

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Speaker 1: Do you think, though, maybe you guys moved too fast

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Speaker 1: because I think that you were concerned that this was

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Speaker 1: your second marriage, this is his third marriage. I think

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Speaker 1: you guys moved too fast. I'm sure this is not

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Speaker 1: what you want in a husband. Cooking and cleaning, those

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Speaker 1: are great qualities, great qualities to have.

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Speaker 2: But since that's all he does.

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Speaker 1: It's definitely not enough to sustain a marriage or to

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Speaker 1: stay in a marriage. He's mean to you, he's selfish

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Speaker 1: and controlling, and he has no regard for what you need.

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Speaker 1: It just sounds like he married you. I'm gonna say it,

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Speaker 1: because your house was paid for and all he had

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Speaker 1: to pay were utility, so he got a scott free financially.

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Speaker 1: I agree with your daughters who said you should get

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Speaker 1: your marriage annulled. I think you should get out of

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Speaker 1: this sham of a marriage just as quickly as you

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Speaker 1: got in it, because it's going to keep getting worse

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Speaker 1: and you're not having sex anyway, and you know he's

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Speaker 1: not the man you thought you knew anyway, So why

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Speaker 1: waste more of your time?

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Speaker 4: Steve, uh, very quick letter to me. You're an older woman,

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Speaker 4: it's your second marriage. You met your husband. He was

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Speaker 4: extremely handsome and generous. Well, you said he was extremely

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Speaker 4: handsome and general was so something happened. Something happened now

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Speaker 4: his last.

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Speaker 5: Got Yeah, yeah, he just he was extremely handsome, y'all,

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Speaker 5: connected spiritually, and he joined your church.

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Speaker 3: Y'all.

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Speaker 4: We didn't court long because he said he knew I

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Speaker 4: was just so so mate.

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Speaker 3: The moment we met.

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Speaker 4: I knew things was going too fast because I'm his

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Speaker 4: third wife, but I felt the same connection to him,

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Speaker 4: so I agreed to marry him. Really, okay, we'll check

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Speaker 4: this out. Only five people came our wedding, and they

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Speaker 4: were all my family. None of his children or family

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Speaker 4: members came. That's because they knew, here we go again.

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Speaker 4: He ain't worth for damn nowhere, so here we go again. Okay,

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Speaker 4: So now that's the end of that. You done got

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Speaker 4: this wedding. Five people came, all of your family. Then

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Speaker 4: your two daughters thought y'all was rushing into it since

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Speaker 4: you only knew him for eight months.

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Speaker 3: I told him how they felt.

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Speaker 4: He snapped back and said, your grown daughters need to

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Speaker 4: stay out of our business. Oh he touched it to,

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Speaker 4: so he fast moved. He ain't handsome no more, and

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Speaker 4: don't the ain't. Nobody in his family either bothered coming

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Speaker 4: to the video to the wedding, and now he touches.

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Speaker 3: I don't see nothing good in this letter at all.

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Speaker 4: On our wedding night, we had sex and it was

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Speaker 4: just okay, all right, And then you figured it would

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Speaker 4: get better with time. It has not, because we ain't

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Speaker 4: had sex since we got married three months ago. What

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Speaker 4: and he don't go to church anymore? Well, he just

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Speaker 4: joined the church to make to make a good showing.

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Speaker 4: On Sunday morning, he go to the casino with his brother.

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Speaker 4: When I asked him about wasting money, he said, he

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Speaker 4: has extra money because my house is paid for and

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Speaker 4: all he has to do is pay utility.

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Speaker 3: Wow, he plage.

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Speaker 4: Yeh h.

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Speaker 3: He's straight cold plage.

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Speaker 4: So he got extra money because his money his money,

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Speaker 4: y'all's money, ain't y'all's money.

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Speaker 1: We'll have part two of your response coming up in

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Speaker 1: twenty three minutes after the hour. Subject today, I don't

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Speaker 1: know my husband at all. We'll get back into it

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Speaker 1: right after this.

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Speaker 2: You're listening hard morning show.

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Speaker 1: All right, Come on, Steve, let's recap today's strawberry letter.

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Speaker 1: The subject I don't know my husband at all.

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Speaker 4: Well, you don't because you rushed into it like your

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Speaker 4: daughters thought you did, and like you realized you did,

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Speaker 4: and you said you thought it might be moving fast

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Speaker 4: because this was his third marriage.

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Speaker 3: He used to be handsome.

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Speaker 4: He ain't no more, ain't but five people come to

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Speaker 4: the wed and they was all your family, his kids,

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Speaker 4: and nobody else showed up.

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Speaker 3: He didn't even tell nobody. Then you've only known it

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Speaker 3: for eight months.

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Speaker 4: Ain't nobody come to the wedding because they knew he

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Speaker 4: wasn't about nothing. Then you told him that your daughters

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Speaker 4: thought they ran into it too quick.

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Speaker 3: He said they need to mind their own bitsin is

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Speaker 3: he touchy on? You wed night?

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Speaker 4: Y'all had sex. It was just okay, So I figured

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Speaker 4: it would get better with time. Is not because y'all

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Speaker 4: ain't had sex since we got married three months ago.

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Speaker 3: You might not be the only one thought it was

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Speaker 3: just okay.

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Speaker 4: Then I just wanted to throw that out there, but

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Speaker 4: it probably it got nothing to do with you, though.

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Speaker 4: It looks like to me, ma'am, you just married the

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Speaker 4: wrong guy. He does not go to church anymore. That's

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Speaker 4: because he just joined your church to make it look good.

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Speaker 4: On Sunday morning, he goes to the casino with his brother.

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Speaker 4: When I asked him about wasting money, he said, he's

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Speaker 4: got extra money because my house is paid for and

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Speaker 4: all he has to do is pay utility.

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Speaker 3: What So he made this own arrangement himself.

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Speaker 4: So in the eight months where you didn't get to

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Speaker 4: know him, he found out everything he needed to know

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Speaker 4: about you. In one of the things. He found out.

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Speaker 4: Your house was paid so now, so it's not a

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Speaker 4: waste of money. I asked him why we don't have sex,

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Speaker 4: and he said it's not a woman's place to do

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Speaker 4: the chasing. So I need to be patient. Let him

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Speaker 4: come on to me. But it's been ninety days. When

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Speaker 4: I created the ninety day rule in my book, it

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Speaker 4: wasn't for people who was mabby. I don't you know.

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Speaker 4: You can go ahead half sick. Now, this ain't the

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Speaker 4: place for the ninety day route.

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Speaker 2: Okay, Steve, I got a question.

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Speaker 3: Okay, she says.

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Speaker 2: On the bright side, yeah, you got it. You gotta

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Speaker 2: get to that. Let me just right here and keep

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Speaker 2: the house clean.

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Speaker 4: It's kind of a responsive mouth, as records go for

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Speaker 4: days that I talk to. My daughters don't like him.

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Speaker 4: I think I should get my marriage to nod. Shirley

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Speaker 4: said you should get in and old. I agree. I'm

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Speaker 4: not ready to give up on him. Well that's a

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Speaker 4: stupid statement, because he gave up on you. Yeah. Right,

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Speaker 4: on the bright side, he cooks dinner every day and

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Speaker 4: he keeps the house clean, so damn what.

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Speaker 3: Every day?

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Speaker 2: Ain't you right?

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Speaker 4: Ain't like he's making plates for you and the people,

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Speaker 4: the homeless people in the neighborhood. He eating he liked cooking,

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Speaker 4: and he like a clean house. He don't like sex

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Speaker 4: with you. He don't like going to church. He don't

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Speaker 4: like talking to you with respect. He don't like your daughters.

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Speaker 2: He doesn't like his family.

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Speaker 4: He don't like his family. His family don't like him.

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Speaker 4: He don't really want to be married. He don't like

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Speaker 4: nobody but the casino and his brother.

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Speaker 2: His brother didn't come to the way.

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Speaker 3: That he go gambling with. It is just a lot

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Speaker 3: right now.

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Speaker 4: Man?

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Speaker 2: Why you tell him your house was paid for? Wow,

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Speaker 2: so pay utilities, cook and clean.

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Speaker 4: The game. If I was you, i'd get your marriage

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Speaker 4: to know like your daughter said, yeah, get it or no,

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Speaker 4: they don't even count as a marriage and walk off

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Speaker 4: and put him out. And you ain't lost nothing. Ain't

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Speaker 4: nothing lost right now? You ain't that you ain't ready

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Speaker 4: to give up on it.

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Speaker 3: You should be. He didne gave up.

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Speaker 4: I mean he threw Yeah, he got out rolled all

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Speaker 4: over him.

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Speaker 3: And how you gonna see it is beyond me. I'm out, lady.

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Speaker 3: You ain't gotta take this here.

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Speaker 4: You could do this by your See, you thought you

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Speaker 4: had a soul mate because he said, I knew used

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Speaker 4: my soulmate. The moment you member that, this is how

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Speaker 4: he treats a soul mate. I don't want to be

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Speaker 4: that type of soul man. Right right, man, I tell

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Speaker 4: you what. Don't call me soul mate, call me stranger.

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Speaker 2: Right right about her daughter's crazy.

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Speaker 4: Man, this dude is a complete wasting time, lady, Come

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Speaker 4: on about your biz.

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Speaker 3: Oh real, he used to be handsome, remember.

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Speaker 1: And generous?

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Speaker 3: Oh boy?

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Speaker 2: He so you're stingy and ugly now.

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Speaker 3: Steve, Yeah, he did just enough to get you.

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Speaker 2: Now, that's what I'm saying, he representative.

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Speaker 3: Wow.

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Speaker 4: I don't want to apologize to some low down ass

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Speaker 4: dudes out here.

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Speaker 3: Man. All that, but that's why.

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Speaker 4: I say, man, you've got to take your time to

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Speaker 4: get to know these yeah people instead of falling in

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Speaker 4: love with their representative the first thirty days. You're gonna

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Speaker 4: get the best him he can be if you just wait,

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Speaker 4: if you'd have waited out, you could have found all

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Speaker 4: this out right.

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Speaker 1: Just because she's an older woman, you know, sometimes she

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Speaker 1: she may have gotten anxious thinking she wasn't going to

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Speaker 1: find anyone else you know, and all that you ain't

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Speaker 1: found nobody.

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Speaker 2: Right, Yeah, that's true.

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Speaker 4: So just let him go get that annument like your

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Speaker 4: daughter say, please get the annoment.

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Speaker 3: Lady going about your business.

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Speaker 1: Yeah all right, Steve, thank you. Post your comments on

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Speaker 1: today's Strawberry Letter. It's Steve HARBFM on Instagram and Facebook.

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Speaker 1: Check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand.

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Speaker 2: You're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show.

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Speaker 5: H