1 00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:04,280 Speaker 1: Welcome to Dirty Rush, The Truth about Sorority life with 2 00:00:04,320 --> 00:00:07,280 Speaker 1: your hosts me Gia Judice. 3 00:00:06,760 --> 00:00:08,520 Speaker 2: Daisy Kent, and Jennifer Kessler. 4 00:00:12,960 --> 00:00:16,599 Speaker 1: Hey, guys, and welcome to Dirty Rush, where we are 5 00:00:16,600 --> 00:00:21,840 Speaker 1: giving you the inside scoop on sorority life. In this episode, 6 00:00:22,040 --> 00:00:26,840 Speaker 1: we are talking about standards. Standards is basically a group 7 00:00:26,920 --> 00:00:29,920 Speaker 1: of people who run a committee. 8 00:00:29,440 --> 00:00:33,600 Speaker 3: And basically punish you on your behavior. 9 00:00:34,479 --> 00:00:38,880 Speaker 1: There is proper etiquette and proper behavior that is necessary 10 00:00:39,040 --> 00:00:40,480 Speaker 1: while being in a sorority. 11 00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:41,879 Speaker 3: And we are. 12 00:00:41,720 --> 00:00:45,279 Speaker 1: Going to dive deep, have some callers calling in and 13 00:00:45,360 --> 00:00:49,600 Speaker 1: telling us their standard story and at the end maybe 14 00:00:49,640 --> 00:00:53,400 Speaker 1: you'll hear a story from me. I have a celebrity 15 00:00:53,400 --> 00:00:56,240 Speaker 1: guest here with me today, Mercedes north Up. 16 00:00:56,280 --> 00:00:59,240 Speaker 4: Welcome to Dirty Rush. Excited to be here, so excited 17 00:00:59,280 --> 00:00:59,840 Speaker 4: to have you here. 18 00:01:00,320 --> 00:01:06,280 Speaker 5: So new announcement. You just launched your podcast. Yes, famously 19 00:01:06,319 --> 00:01:10,160 Speaker 5: available with Ben. It has been so much fun, having fun. 20 00:01:10,520 --> 00:01:12,319 Speaker 5: It's all about dating, so you know. 21 00:01:12,480 --> 00:01:13,679 Speaker 4: Getting back into the dating room. 22 00:01:13,800 --> 00:01:16,600 Speaker 5: Yes, girl, I'm back in there. It's so scary, but 23 00:01:16,640 --> 00:01:17,280 Speaker 5: I'm ready. 24 00:01:17,640 --> 00:01:18,399 Speaker 3: Honestly, this is. 25 00:01:18,400 --> 00:01:20,560 Speaker 4: So fun though. Yes, the dating podcast. 26 00:01:21,160 --> 00:01:25,160 Speaker 1: You're kind of just doing the intros right now, but 27 00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:28,919 Speaker 1: then you're gonna get into dating, like went on dates 28 00:01:29,080 --> 00:01:30,440 Speaker 1: via podcast. 29 00:01:30,080 --> 00:01:33,520 Speaker 5: Yeah, which is so crazy interesting. So I kind of 30 00:01:33,560 --> 00:01:36,120 Speaker 5: took a break from dating. I haven't dated in like 31 00:01:36,160 --> 00:01:39,760 Speaker 5: two years, which is a long time. I needed time 32 00:01:39,920 --> 00:01:41,600 Speaker 5: just to like, I don't know, I went through I 33 00:01:41,600 --> 00:01:43,760 Speaker 5: had a really bad situation ship again, you know. So 34 00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:46,399 Speaker 5: I had two years off and I was like, I 35 00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:48,640 Speaker 5: saw my mom. I'm like, I think the next time, 36 00:01:48,680 --> 00:01:49,880 Speaker 5: Like I'm going to go on a date, Like they're 37 00:01:49,880 --> 00:01:51,200 Speaker 5: setting me up on a day I need to like 38 00:01:51,800 --> 00:01:55,280 Speaker 5: get ready. So I'm clienting my practice date on Saturday. 39 00:01:55,360 --> 00:01:58,480 Speaker 5: The poor guy doesn't know it, but who knows. 40 00:01:58,520 --> 00:02:04,279 Speaker 1: Maybe this practice yining armor literally know, Oh. 41 00:02:04,200 --> 00:02:05,040 Speaker 4: My god, I love that. 42 00:02:05,320 --> 00:02:08,639 Speaker 5: Yeah okay, so my fingers crossed for the date on side. Yeah, 43 00:02:08,720 --> 00:02:09,119 Speaker 5: we'll see. 44 00:02:09,120 --> 00:02:09,400 Speaker 6: I don't know. 45 00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:10,200 Speaker 5: I'll keep you updated. 46 00:02:11,360 --> 00:02:14,120 Speaker 1: So Dirty Rush, you know that it's all about sorority life, 47 00:02:14,160 --> 00:02:17,119 Speaker 1: and we kind of just talk about the good, the bad, 48 00:02:17,160 --> 00:02:20,520 Speaker 1: the ugly and really get into the truth about sorority life. 49 00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:23,239 Speaker 4: So where did you go? Were you in a sorority? 50 00:02:23,440 --> 00:02:23,680 Speaker 7: Yes? 51 00:02:23,720 --> 00:02:24,799 Speaker 4: What was your experience? 52 00:02:24,960 --> 00:02:25,040 Speaker 8: Like? 53 00:02:25,440 --> 00:02:30,240 Speaker 4: So I went to Iowa State and stayed in state. 54 00:02:30,600 --> 00:02:34,040 Speaker 5: Yes, okay, yeah, yep, went i of state study fashion. 55 00:02:34,120 --> 00:02:35,840 Speaker 5: It was like, I loved that school. It was so 56 00:02:35,919 --> 00:02:39,720 Speaker 5: much fun. But I honestly didn't know much about recruitment, 57 00:02:40,600 --> 00:02:42,359 Speaker 5: but I a few Are you the oldest? 58 00:02:42,720 --> 00:02:43,600 Speaker 4: Yeah? 59 00:02:43,639 --> 00:02:46,400 Speaker 5: And my mom was like having fifteen, Like she didn't 60 00:02:46,400 --> 00:02:48,640 Speaker 5: go to college. So I was like, my moss one 61 00:02:48,760 --> 00:02:49,400 Speaker 5: nothing when I. 62 00:02:49,320 --> 00:02:51,560 Speaker 4: Don't you have to pay deuce? She goes what was like, 63 00:02:51,600 --> 00:02:55,040 Speaker 4: what is that? Yeah? Literally, you're rushing a sorority. What's that? 64 00:02:55,360 --> 00:02:55,800 Speaker 7: Literally? 65 00:02:55,840 --> 00:02:56,240 Speaker 6: That was me. 66 00:02:56,360 --> 00:02:58,000 Speaker 5: I had no idea what I was doing, what I 67 00:02:58,040 --> 00:03:01,600 Speaker 5: was getting myself into. But my roommate she was like, 68 00:03:01,639 --> 00:03:03,040 Speaker 5: I'm doing it, like you should do it with me, 69 00:03:03,080 --> 00:03:05,360 Speaker 5: And I'm like, okay, like sure, why not? 70 00:03:05,520 --> 00:03:06,600 Speaker 4: Like that's just what it is. 71 00:03:07,240 --> 00:03:10,400 Speaker 5: Went through recruitment, had a really good recruitment process, honestly, 72 00:03:11,120 --> 00:03:16,520 Speaker 5: and my top three were the Z, Kapa and tried 73 00:03:16,560 --> 00:03:19,920 Speaker 5: delt Okay, and then pref Night, I went Kappa and DZ, 74 00:03:20,240 --> 00:03:22,840 Speaker 5: and then I ended up going DZ. Bitted them, they 75 00:03:22,840 --> 00:03:25,160 Speaker 5: bitted me, so that's where I went, and I loved 76 00:03:25,200 --> 00:03:27,080 Speaker 5: d Z. It was so much fun. I met like 77 00:03:27,120 --> 00:03:33,240 Speaker 5: all my best friends, but there was some issues too. 78 00:03:34,040 --> 00:03:35,320 Speaker 4: They were very. 79 00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:38,920 Speaker 5: Hard on us sometimes, like just having like certain things 80 00:03:38,960 --> 00:03:41,680 Speaker 5: that we could do and couldn't do. And I was, 81 00:03:41,880 --> 00:03:45,120 Speaker 5: you know, a freshman. I'm like, I'm literally in college. 82 00:03:45,160 --> 00:03:47,400 Speaker 5: I this is my time to like do what I want, 83 00:03:47,480 --> 00:03:49,280 Speaker 5: Like let me go to a party, let me post 84 00:03:49,320 --> 00:03:50,360 Speaker 5: a beer in the. 85 00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:52,840 Speaker 4: Oh, and you couldn't and we would get fine. 86 00:03:53,120 --> 00:03:53,320 Speaker 1: Yeah. 87 00:03:53,360 --> 00:03:55,800 Speaker 5: Oh my, I gotta say I was stayed in standards. 88 00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:59,000 Speaker 5: Oh my gosh, like I was sending my ass to standards. 89 00:03:59,040 --> 00:04:01,760 Speaker 1: They really did, but it was until you were initiated, 90 00:04:01,880 --> 00:04:05,040 Speaker 1: after initiation, then you were able to write no. 91 00:04:05,280 --> 00:04:07,760 Speaker 5: Oh no, No, they were very strict. Maybe they didn't 92 00:04:07,760 --> 00:04:10,680 Speaker 5: want that image. It's just so crazy because we were 93 00:04:10,680 --> 00:04:13,280 Speaker 5: like cut it on the party house, okay, but they 94 00:04:13,360 --> 00:04:16,440 Speaker 5: like were very but like the Yeah, they were strict. 95 00:04:16,640 --> 00:04:18,480 Speaker 4: And you were in your sorority all four years. 96 00:04:18,680 --> 00:04:23,159 Speaker 5: No, I actually dropped my junior year, did you just 97 00:04:23,200 --> 00:04:25,920 Speaker 5: because I was getting I was tired of getting fined 98 00:04:26,680 --> 00:04:29,919 Speaker 5: like random things like I don't even remember what I 99 00:04:29,920 --> 00:04:31,480 Speaker 5: got fined for, but I was like I'm not paying that, 100 00:04:31,520 --> 00:04:33,720 Speaker 5: like I'm not doing this anymore. Like and it was 101 00:04:33,800 --> 00:04:34,760 Speaker 5: just so expensive. 102 00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:36,480 Speaker 4: Oh yeah, sometimes it's a money grab. 103 00:04:36,600 --> 00:04:36,800 Speaker 9: Yeah. 104 00:04:36,800 --> 00:04:40,280 Speaker 5: I think my dues were like three hundred dollars if 105 00:04:40,320 --> 00:04:44,000 Speaker 5: you a month and then if you missed, which as 106 00:04:44,040 --> 00:04:46,679 Speaker 5: a college students like pretty expensive, Like I was paying 107 00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:49,880 Speaker 5: for it, So that was that. And then also like 108 00:04:49,920 --> 00:04:52,760 Speaker 5: if you missed, what's it? Why am I forgetting what 109 00:04:52,760 --> 00:04:55,520 Speaker 5: it's called? Like chapter chapter? They find you like one 110 00:04:55,560 --> 00:04:58,440 Speaker 5: hundred dollars. Yeah, I'm not doing that. And I loved 111 00:04:58,480 --> 00:05:00,680 Speaker 5: going home and like being with my family, and it 112 00:05:00,680 --> 00:05:01,640 Speaker 5: was always on Sundays. 113 00:05:02,120 --> 00:05:04,000 Speaker 4: I was like, yeah, after it was always on Sunday, 114 00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:04,839 Speaker 4: always on Sundays. 115 00:05:04,920 --> 00:05:06,440 Speaker 1: I hated that when I would go home for Sunday 116 00:05:06,480 --> 00:05:08,599 Speaker 1: dinner and I had to leave to go to chapter That's. 117 00:05:08,400 --> 00:05:09,040 Speaker 4: What I'm saying. 118 00:05:10,640 --> 00:05:13,640 Speaker 1: And I would have to like request, like, can I 119 00:05:13,680 --> 00:05:17,840 Speaker 1: go on zoom today for this chapter meeting? I would 120 00:05:17,839 --> 00:05:20,840 Speaker 1: always say, Now, sometimes we were in drafter for five. 121 00:05:20,680 --> 00:05:23,200 Speaker 5: Minutes, I know, and they needed to do Yeah, it's 122 00:05:23,279 --> 00:05:27,120 Speaker 5: so dope, they needed five minutes. Yeah, but yeah, I 123 00:05:27,200 --> 00:05:30,279 Speaker 5: was just over the fighting and over getting in trouble 124 00:05:30,279 --> 00:05:30,599 Speaker 5: with them. 125 00:05:30,640 --> 00:05:32,359 Speaker 4: So I was like, I'm just going to drop. 126 00:05:36,240 --> 00:05:38,280 Speaker 3: Sarah, Welcome to Dirty Rush. 127 00:05:38,720 --> 00:05:42,120 Speaker 4: Hi, thanks for having me so excited to hear your story. 128 00:05:42,960 --> 00:05:43,200 Speaker 8: Yeah. 129 00:05:43,240 --> 00:05:45,479 Speaker 10: So I think I kind of have a unique like 130 00:05:45,680 --> 00:05:50,280 Speaker 10: experience because when I was in college, I went to 131 00:05:50,360 --> 00:05:52,719 Speaker 10: a really big public school in LA. 132 00:05:53,480 --> 00:05:54,520 Speaker 8: Some people might know it. 133 00:05:54,520 --> 00:05:55,000 Speaker 4: It's U C. 134 00:05:55,200 --> 00:05:55,360 Speaker 11: L A. 135 00:05:55,640 --> 00:05:57,040 Speaker 3: And oh was sick. 136 00:05:57,279 --> 00:05:59,440 Speaker 8: And I like definitely loved my experience. 137 00:05:59,440 --> 00:06:01,960 Speaker 10: But I so much so that I was president of 138 00:06:01,960 --> 00:06:04,720 Speaker 10: my sorority. And so when I was president, I served 139 00:06:04,720 --> 00:06:07,719 Speaker 10: on standards. A big reason why a lot of people 140 00:06:07,720 --> 00:06:09,960 Speaker 10: got called into standards was because a lot of our 141 00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:14,559 Speaker 10: events were off campus at different venues around the city 142 00:06:14,560 --> 00:06:16,800 Speaker 10: in La, and so there would be these long bus 143 00:06:16,880 --> 00:06:21,920 Speaker 10: rides where people would heavily pregame prior to these bus 144 00:06:22,040 --> 00:06:27,440 Speaker 10: rides to these events, and every single event, without fail, 145 00:06:27,880 --> 00:06:30,800 Speaker 10: somebody would throw up on the bus. And we had 146 00:06:30,839 --> 00:06:34,720 Speaker 10: members of our sorority called like sober sisters sober monitors, 147 00:06:35,160 --> 00:06:37,520 Speaker 10: whose role was to like, of course make sure everyone 148 00:06:37,600 --> 00:06:40,760 Speaker 10: was safe and okay, but also to like give trash 149 00:06:40,800 --> 00:06:42,680 Speaker 10: back to anyone on the bus that would looked like 150 00:06:42,680 --> 00:06:44,440 Speaker 10: they were about to throw up, and then also like 151 00:06:44,560 --> 00:06:47,040 Speaker 10: report them back to the sorority if they did throw up, 152 00:06:47,080 --> 00:06:48,960 Speaker 10: because like then the sorority would have to pay that 153 00:06:49,040 --> 00:06:50,240 Speaker 10: huge fine or whatever. 154 00:06:50,720 --> 00:06:53,080 Speaker 3: Yeah, so that was a. 155 00:06:53,040 --> 00:06:57,560 Speaker 10: Big standards call in and I, yes was president, was 156 00:06:57,720 --> 00:07:00,920 Speaker 10: serving on the on board of standards. Prior to that, 157 00:07:01,360 --> 00:07:07,159 Speaker 10: had been called into standards for throwing up on a bus. 158 00:07:07,560 --> 00:07:10,440 Speaker 10: I was a freshman and I was actually supposed to 159 00:07:10,440 --> 00:07:15,120 Speaker 10: be a sober monitor. Oh no, yeah, so it was 160 00:07:15,200 --> 00:07:16,840 Speaker 10: really bad. It was like, not only did you throw 161 00:07:16,880 --> 00:07:18,400 Speaker 10: up on the bus, but you. 162 00:07:18,440 --> 00:07:21,000 Speaker 3: Also you were watching everywhere. 163 00:07:21,360 --> 00:07:21,600 Speaker 9: Yeah. 164 00:07:21,800 --> 00:07:26,960 Speaker 10: Was not my proudest moment, but that that's my standard story. 165 00:07:27,880 --> 00:07:29,440 Speaker 4: That is so funny. 166 00:07:29,800 --> 00:07:34,400 Speaker 1: Girls got brought to standards because they were encouraging me 167 00:07:34,600 --> 00:07:36,680 Speaker 1: to drink on midnight. 168 00:07:36,600 --> 00:07:39,400 Speaker 8: When you were just when you had just basically like. 169 00:07:39,720 --> 00:07:42,800 Speaker 1: Just went home, like I just went to Zeta, I 170 00:07:43,280 --> 00:07:46,760 Speaker 1: just got my bid, Like we ran home and it 171 00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:49,240 Speaker 1: was midday, so we were all just like having a 172 00:07:49,240 --> 00:07:50,400 Speaker 1: big party in the house. 173 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:51,520 Speaker 3: And to be. 174 00:07:51,480 --> 00:07:56,920 Speaker 10: Honest, though, were you did you feel peer pressured or 175 00:07:56,960 --> 00:08:00,280 Speaker 10: were you oh take part? 176 00:08:00,680 --> 00:08:03,600 Speaker 3: No, like one hundred percent, I felt here pressured. Oh 177 00:08:03,680 --> 00:08:07,960 Speaker 3: you did no good drink like no, because I knew 178 00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:09,160 Speaker 3: I wasn't supposed to. 179 00:08:10,040 --> 00:08:13,160 Speaker 1: But somehow standards got wind of it, and then my 180 00:08:13,240 --> 00:08:17,640 Speaker 1: older sisters got in trouble because they were. 181 00:08:17,400 --> 00:08:19,040 Speaker 3: Like, like, what are you doing? 182 00:08:19,160 --> 00:08:23,280 Speaker 1: This is obviously unacceptable, And then that girl literally had 183 00:08:23,280 --> 00:08:24,720 Speaker 1: to write an apology. 184 00:08:24,280 --> 00:08:24,760 Speaker 3: Letter to me. 185 00:08:25,360 --> 00:08:26,800 Speaker 1: I didn't think it was that big of a deal, 186 00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:28,840 Speaker 1: but obviously it was a big deal to the sorority 187 00:08:28,880 --> 00:08:32,120 Speaker 1: because for liability purposes. 188 00:08:32,480 --> 00:08:36,600 Speaker 10: Then it's like when Standard catches you, then what do 189 00:08:36,640 --> 00:08:40,120 Speaker 10: they do with you to punish you? This Standard punishment 190 00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:44,680 Speaker 10: was like you have to be a sober sister again. 191 00:08:44,920 --> 00:08:47,920 Speaker 1: I think that was the main punishment for Zeta too. 192 00:08:48,200 --> 00:08:50,840 Speaker 1: It was either like they would take away some mixture, 193 00:08:51,120 --> 00:08:54,440 Speaker 1: some mixers you weren't able to go out, or like 194 00:08:54,480 --> 00:08:57,080 Speaker 1: they made you a sober monitor for the next eight party. 195 00:08:57,559 --> 00:09:01,520 Speaker 1: And obviously if you got that, you were pissed because 196 00:09:01,679 --> 00:09:07,360 Speaker 1: your night was ruined. I think Standards definitely has their 197 00:09:07,360 --> 00:09:11,000 Speaker 1: normal protocol and what they follow. I think the end 198 00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:13,040 Speaker 1: goal is just to make you more like a better 199 00:09:13,080 --> 00:09:15,640 Speaker 1: and more responsible person in the long run. 200 00:09:16,600 --> 00:09:18,719 Speaker 4: Thank you, Sarah, This. 201 00:09:18,840 --> 00:09:21,800 Speaker 1: Was awesome, but I'm glad you made a step up. 202 00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:25,520 Speaker 1: You went from throwing up on the bus on the 203 00:09:25,559 --> 00:09:28,400 Speaker 1: way to a day party to then becoming. 204 00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:29,720 Speaker 3: The president of your sorority. 205 00:09:29,679 --> 00:09:32,679 Speaker 1: Yeah, so that shows growth. This is exactly what the 206 00:09:32,679 --> 00:09:37,000 Speaker 1: sororities wanted. Miranda, Welcome to Dirty Rush. 207 00:09:37,040 --> 00:09:40,120 Speaker 9: Thank you so much. When you say the word Standards, 208 00:09:40,240 --> 00:09:43,120 Speaker 9: I get chills in my body. It literally brings back 209 00:09:43,480 --> 00:09:48,800 Speaker 9: trauma feelings. No, I hate that, yeah, in a funny way. 210 00:09:48,760 --> 00:09:51,760 Speaker 1: But I feel like everyone felt like that when they 211 00:09:51,760 --> 00:09:53,000 Speaker 1: got called to standards. 212 00:09:53,040 --> 00:09:55,200 Speaker 9: It's so true because no one gets called in for 213 00:09:55,280 --> 00:09:58,959 Speaker 9: a great reason. And our standards was made up of 214 00:09:58,960 --> 00:10:03,040 Speaker 9: our friends, sisters, and then an advisor or two, so 215 00:10:03,080 --> 00:10:06,000 Speaker 9: it was pretty intense and my funny enough. When I 216 00:10:06,120 --> 00:10:09,200 Speaker 9: was in my aurority, my sister was also in the 217 00:10:09,240 --> 00:10:11,200 Speaker 9: same southrority and she was on standards. 218 00:10:11,320 --> 00:10:15,560 Speaker 1: She probably like internally wanted to kill you, like, oh 219 00:10:15,600 --> 00:10:18,200 Speaker 1: my god, my sister just getting called. 220 00:10:19,400 --> 00:10:22,520 Speaker 9: The honest truth is I wish it was for an exciting, 221 00:10:22,559 --> 00:10:25,320 Speaker 9: fun reason, like a behavioral one. But I was called 222 00:10:25,320 --> 00:10:28,680 Speaker 9: in with my sister to standards. And again she was 223 00:10:28,720 --> 00:10:32,240 Speaker 9: on standards because our bills were never paid because my 224 00:10:32,360 --> 00:10:36,240 Speaker 9: dad is just a very fun kind of traveling guy 225 00:10:36,280 --> 00:10:39,120 Speaker 9: who just would completely forget or not send in the 226 00:10:39,160 --> 00:10:42,920 Speaker 9: paycheck or the building. So we would get called in together. 227 00:10:43,040 --> 00:10:45,920 Speaker 9: And again she was on standards because our bills were 228 00:10:45,960 --> 00:10:49,080 Speaker 9: not being paid. And I remember sitting there thinking, I'm nineteen, 229 00:10:49,240 --> 00:10:52,000 Speaker 9: I have, you know, twenty dollars at best in my pocket, 230 00:10:52,080 --> 00:10:54,160 Speaker 9: Like I don't know what to do about this. Yeah, 231 00:10:54,160 --> 00:10:57,400 Speaker 9: And it was just very awkward, hilarious experience because it 232 00:10:57,440 --> 00:11:00,720 Speaker 9: was my friends saying pay your bill and saying, okay, 233 00:11:00,840 --> 00:11:03,400 Speaker 9: call my parents because I barely have money for dinner 234 00:11:03,400 --> 00:11:06,079 Speaker 9: this week. When I hear standards now, it just brings 235 00:11:06,160 --> 00:11:09,160 Speaker 9: up a little PTSD because it was not fun. 236 00:11:09,400 --> 00:11:13,160 Speaker 1: Looking back at standards, I feel like they were just 237 00:11:13,240 --> 00:11:15,480 Speaker 1: trying to constantly teach you a lesson. 238 00:11:15,760 --> 00:11:18,320 Speaker 9: I so agree. I think there were so many lessons 239 00:11:18,360 --> 00:11:20,560 Speaker 9: being in authority and learning to live with all the 240 00:11:20,600 --> 00:11:34,320 Speaker 9: girls and absolutely standards was is reality. 241 00:11:37,800 --> 00:11:42,880 Speaker 2: Hi guys, it's Jen Fessler here with another standard story. 242 00:11:43,280 --> 00:11:44,680 Speaker 6: Here on Dirty Rush. 243 00:11:44,760 --> 00:11:47,280 Speaker 2: We have Elizabeth today who's going to talk to us 244 00:11:47,320 --> 00:11:52,080 Speaker 2: about her experience that she had in terms of standards 245 00:11:52,200 --> 00:11:55,079 Speaker 2: and what happened and how it all went down. 246 00:11:55,440 --> 00:12:00,160 Speaker 11: So Hi Elizabeth, Hi, Okay, Yes, So my standards story 247 00:12:00,679 --> 00:12:05,080 Speaker 11: was kind of the typical of posting with alcohol, not 248 00:12:05,480 --> 00:12:06,439 Speaker 11: being able to post. 249 00:12:06,280 --> 00:12:10,720 Speaker 8: With alcohol, and I knew that. But basically, in my sorority, 250 00:12:10,760 --> 00:12:14,160 Speaker 8: we have an Instagram account and it's a normal girl's name, 251 00:12:14,360 --> 00:12:18,400 Speaker 8: but if they comment a heart on your post, it 252 00:12:18,480 --> 00:12:22,079 Speaker 8: means delete that post immediately and we won't say anything 253 00:12:22,120 --> 00:12:25,760 Speaker 8: to you, and it's all good. But my ambitious self 254 00:12:25,880 --> 00:12:29,160 Speaker 8: was like, Oh, they're gonna forget about that. They're not 255 00:12:29,200 --> 00:12:31,640 Speaker 8: gonna remember they commented a heart, So I did not 256 00:12:31,720 --> 00:12:35,360 Speaker 8: delete that post. And then I posted again with what 257 00:12:35,440 --> 00:12:37,320 Speaker 8: looked like a lemonade cup. It could have been a 258 00:12:37,360 --> 00:12:41,240 Speaker 8: lemonade cup, but it was alcohol. And they commented another 259 00:12:41,280 --> 00:12:44,040 Speaker 8: heart on my post, and so I was like, oh, no, 260 00:12:44,400 --> 00:12:46,920 Speaker 8: like two hearts. Now, I should probably delete it, but 261 00:12:47,280 --> 00:12:47,800 Speaker 8: I didn't. 262 00:12:48,080 --> 00:12:48,720 Speaker 6: Why didn't you? 263 00:12:49,040 --> 00:12:51,480 Speaker 8: I don't know. I think I was just kind of like, 264 00:12:52,160 --> 00:12:54,920 Speaker 8: it looks like lemonade, like, and I was like, this 265 00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:57,240 Speaker 8: is such a double standard. So many of them post 266 00:12:57,320 --> 00:13:00,560 Speaker 8: with alcohol, like and they it's just a favorite thing. 267 00:13:00,720 --> 00:13:02,600 Speaker 8: They pick the people they want to call the art 268 00:13:02,720 --> 00:13:04,920 Speaker 8: and then they pick people that they're like, oh, they 269 00:13:04,920 --> 00:13:05,800 Speaker 8: can get away with it. 270 00:13:06,040 --> 00:13:09,280 Speaker 2: So it was almost like you're almost not giving them 271 00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:12,960 Speaker 2: a fu but kind of like you were sort of 272 00:13:12,960 --> 00:13:14,840 Speaker 2: standing up for yourself in say so it wasn't. 273 00:13:14,679 --> 00:13:16,360 Speaker 6: As if you were just like, they won't notice. It 274 00:13:16,400 --> 00:13:18,360 Speaker 6: was more like, no, this is not fair. 275 00:13:18,800 --> 00:13:20,320 Speaker 8: I think it was a little bit of both, Like 276 00:13:20,360 --> 00:13:22,440 Speaker 8: the first time it was like, oh, they won't notice, 277 00:13:22,440 --> 00:13:23,920 Speaker 8: and then the second time it was like, this is 278 00:13:23,960 --> 00:13:26,000 Speaker 8: so annoying. I keep seeing all these people in my 279 00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:30,080 Speaker 8: sorority posting with alcohol as well, and all these posts 280 00:13:30,080 --> 00:13:31,880 Speaker 8: are not getting hearts on it, Like why am I 281 00:13:31,920 --> 00:13:35,920 Speaker 8: getting a heart comment? So and of course I'm like 282 00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:39,000 Speaker 8: thinking my private story on Snapchat is like a safe 283 00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:41,120 Speaker 8: place to go. So I'm like, they're trying to take 284 00:13:41,200 --> 00:13:44,280 Speaker 8: my like rights away. I can post it right want whatever? 285 00:13:44,760 --> 00:13:46,840 Speaker 2: In I mean, I'm not, I don't even I don't 286 00:13:46,880 --> 00:13:50,240 Speaker 2: think that's so out of the realm of. 287 00:13:51,960 --> 00:13:54,320 Speaker 6: Right and true. You should be able to post what 288 00:13:54,320 --> 00:13:54,600 Speaker 6: you want. 289 00:13:54,679 --> 00:13:56,600 Speaker 2: Although I get that, I guess you know what you 290 00:13:56,600 --> 00:14:00,880 Speaker 2: guys post is in some way or reflection problems. When 291 00:14:00,920 --> 00:14:04,160 Speaker 2: I was I was in a sorority a million and 292 00:14:04,240 --> 00:14:07,280 Speaker 2: ten years ago, we didn't have social media. But was 293 00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:09,880 Speaker 2: it also is it a particularly fun post? Were you like, 294 00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:11,600 Speaker 2: I love this post. I don't want to take it down? 295 00:14:13,200 --> 00:14:15,880 Speaker 8: It was a semester recap, so I was like, okay, 296 00:14:15,920 --> 00:14:16,440 Speaker 8: I have to take. 297 00:14:16,320 --> 00:14:17,520 Speaker 6: The time on it. 298 00:14:17,800 --> 00:14:20,960 Speaker 8: Yeah, right, And it was like yeah, And I think 299 00:14:20,960 --> 00:14:23,120 Speaker 8: this was before the Instagram update of like you can 300 00:14:23,160 --> 00:14:25,920 Speaker 8: delete one like slide out of your post, So this 301 00:14:26,000 --> 00:14:26,840 Speaker 8: was before you can. 302 00:14:27,120 --> 00:14:28,680 Speaker 6: That's good for me to know you can do that. 303 00:14:28,840 --> 00:14:31,160 Speaker 8: Yeah, but before you couldn't do that. So I was like, oh, 304 00:14:31,200 --> 00:14:35,880 Speaker 8: this is my semester post, like I'm whatever, right, right, yeah, 305 00:14:36,080 --> 00:14:41,200 Speaker 8: But then they DM me and I'm like still in 306 00:14:41,200 --> 00:14:43,240 Speaker 8: this stubborn state of mind of like I just won't 307 00:14:43,240 --> 00:14:45,560 Speaker 8: open it. It doesn't stay seen if I don't open it. 308 00:14:45,680 --> 00:14:50,840 Speaker 8: So like, so this Instagram account DMS meat like, I 309 00:14:50,840 --> 00:14:51,680 Speaker 8: don't know, I. 310 00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:53,680 Speaker 2: Want to meet your mom. I want my daughter to 311 00:14:53,760 --> 00:14:55,360 Speaker 2: be just like that. She is actually like this. 312 00:14:55,560 --> 00:14:58,720 Speaker 8: I think my mom would be so upset with me. Really, 313 00:14:59,600 --> 00:15:03,160 Speaker 8: she was just delete it. It's Instagram, and I'd be like. 314 00:15:03,120 --> 00:15:03,880 Speaker 6: Maybe she's right. 315 00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:06,400 Speaker 2: I don't even know, but I'm kind of like, I'm 316 00:15:06,440 --> 00:15:09,520 Speaker 2: just happy to hear about you not letting yourself get 317 00:15:09,560 --> 00:15:10,160 Speaker 2: pushed around. 318 00:15:10,200 --> 00:15:12,960 Speaker 6: Although yeah you did, Okay, I'll let you finish your story. 319 00:15:13,200 --> 00:15:16,160 Speaker 8: So then anyways, I'm like, oh, I got away with it, 320 00:15:16,200 --> 00:15:19,360 Speaker 8: but little did I know. I get a standards email. 321 00:15:19,480 --> 00:15:21,840 Speaker 8: So I think every school does a different but for mine, 322 00:15:22,440 --> 00:15:25,040 Speaker 8: we get an email and it's like come an hour 323 00:15:25,120 --> 00:15:27,880 Speaker 8: before chapter on Sundays and you just go into this 324 00:15:28,000 --> 00:15:30,080 Speaker 8: room and they basically tell you what you did. Some 325 00:15:30,080 --> 00:15:32,200 Speaker 8: people go in there like completely blind, like I don't 326 00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:34,960 Speaker 8: even know what I did. I obviously had all of 327 00:15:34,960 --> 00:15:39,040 Speaker 8: this right, and I did. So I go into this meeting. 328 00:15:39,320 --> 00:15:43,600 Speaker 8: It's the president, risk chair, the standards committee, just like 329 00:15:43,640 --> 00:15:45,440 Speaker 8: all of them, and I'm like, basically in. 330 00:15:45,360 --> 00:15:47,040 Speaker 6: A circle or do they like you have to face 331 00:15:47,120 --> 00:15:47,480 Speaker 6: them all. 332 00:15:47,960 --> 00:15:49,840 Speaker 8: It's just like around a table and you just sit 333 00:15:49,880 --> 00:15:52,400 Speaker 8: down one of the chairs. It's actually like pretty chill 334 00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:56,440 Speaker 8: at my school. They don't make it very crazy, but 335 00:15:56,520 --> 00:15:58,560 Speaker 8: it is a little bit intimidating sitting down with like 336 00:15:58,600 --> 00:16:00,720 Speaker 8: the president of your sorority and you know exactly what 337 00:16:00,800 --> 00:16:04,600 Speaker 8: you did and so yeah, so they just sat me 338 00:16:04,640 --> 00:16:07,960 Speaker 8: down and they were like listen, like we commented the hearts, 339 00:16:08,040 --> 00:16:10,640 Speaker 8: you know, the drill, we DMD you, I know, you 340 00:16:10,680 --> 00:16:13,360 Speaker 8: didn't open it, like they knew exactly what it was right, 341 00:16:14,880 --> 00:16:18,640 Speaker 8: And I was just like I'm sorry, yeah, it won't 342 00:16:18,640 --> 00:16:22,320 Speaker 8: happen again. I'm just explaining that. And then there has 343 00:16:22,360 --> 00:16:26,440 Speaker 8: to be a repercussion for everything, basically with standards. And 344 00:16:26,520 --> 00:16:30,520 Speaker 8: so they had me write a ham written paper like 345 00:16:30,560 --> 00:16:33,920 Speaker 8: a letter to them basically saying how exactly what you 346 00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:36,120 Speaker 8: said before, like this is a reflection of us as 347 00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:38,280 Speaker 8: a chapter. This isn't just because we want you to 348 00:16:38,320 --> 00:16:42,119 Speaker 8: take down your Instagram post and I was like, okay, 349 00:16:42,160 --> 00:16:44,080 Speaker 8: that's okay, I'll do that. So it had to be 350 00:16:44,120 --> 00:16:46,000 Speaker 8: a handwritten letter, and I had to bring it into 351 00:16:46,080 --> 00:16:50,200 Speaker 8: chapter the week after on Sunday. And so in this letter, 352 00:16:50,240 --> 00:16:52,840 Speaker 8: I'm just like, this won't happen again. I understand this 353 00:16:52,880 --> 00:16:56,600 Speaker 8: is a reflection of my sorority. I committed to something, 354 00:16:56,840 --> 00:16:59,640 Speaker 8: like just kind of writing what they want to hear, 355 00:17:00,160 --> 00:17:02,720 Speaker 8: like it's an Instagram post. I don't really care. And 356 00:17:02,760 --> 00:17:05,639 Speaker 8: then yeah, so then you have to bring it in 357 00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:08,000 Speaker 8: the next week into chapter and hand it to them. 358 00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:10,760 Speaker 8: But of course you're walking into chapter with a piece 359 00:17:10,760 --> 00:17:15,480 Speaker 8: of paper, and everyone knows what this means, like it's anyone. 360 00:17:14,640 --> 00:17:16,880 Speaker 6: Really cares, and everyone like kind of laughing about it. 361 00:17:17,240 --> 00:17:20,400 Speaker 8: Yeah, it's a laughing matter. It's not like, oh my gosh, 362 00:17:20,560 --> 00:17:22,480 Speaker 8: blah blah blah. I mean so many people have to 363 00:17:22,520 --> 00:17:24,600 Speaker 8: do this. Half my friends had to do stuff because 364 00:17:24,600 --> 00:17:26,680 Speaker 8: they didn't show up to events that were mandatory and 365 00:17:26,680 --> 00:17:29,679 Speaker 8: they had to write letter saying that it's really rude 366 00:17:29,720 --> 00:17:33,440 Speaker 8: to commit to something and then whatever. So it's all 367 00:17:33,480 --> 00:17:36,080 Speaker 8: hand written letters. But when you're showing up to chapter 368 00:17:36,320 --> 00:17:38,719 Speaker 8: with a ham written letter, like everyone knows that you 369 00:17:38,840 --> 00:17:42,360 Speaker 8: went to standard right right my eyes, I'm like slyly 370 00:17:42,480 --> 00:17:45,119 Speaker 8: handing my piece of the person. 371 00:17:45,040 --> 00:17:46,439 Speaker 6: For you embarrass did you feel? 372 00:17:47,200 --> 00:17:48,800 Speaker 2: I mean, I just think I'm thinking about why they 373 00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:50,719 Speaker 2: make you do it that way, Like why they make 374 00:17:50,760 --> 00:17:55,840 Speaker 2: you walk into chapter with it, yeah, written in front 375 00:17:55,880 --> 00:17:58,639 Speaker 2: of everyone and hand it over. I mean it's so 376 00:17:58,720 --> 00:18:02,600 Speaker 2: obviously too I'm sorry to say, but you may not agree, 377 00:18:02,640 --> 00:18:03,880 Speaker 2: but to kind of shame you a little bit. 378 00:18:04,160 --> 00:18:05,919 Speaker 8: Oh yeah, I think half of it is. But I 379 00:18:05,920 --> 00:18:09,359 Speaker 8: also think my sorority is like traditional with a lot 380 00:18:09,400 --> 00:18:11,240 Speaker 8: of things. We don't like to do a lot of 381 00:18:11,280 --> 00:18:14,480 Speaker 8: stuff on technology. So I think maybe the traditional part 382 00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:16,640 Speaker 8: of it is like oh hamdwritten letter. It's a little 383 00:18:16,640 --> 00:18:19,200 Speaker 8: bit more like authentic and like you mean it rather 384 00:18:19,280 --> 00:18:23,679 Speaker 8: than like chat gbting something or whatever. Yeah, but I 385 00:18:23,680 --> 00:18:26,360 Speaker 8: think that actually, like physically handing it to them during 386 00:18:26,480 --> 00:18:28,760 Speaker 8: chapter is definitely like oh. 387 00:18:28,760 --> 00:18:32,480 Speaker 2: We're gonna shame yeah exactly. 388 00:18:34,240 --> 00:18:34,480 Speaker 8: Yeah. 389 00:18:34,560 --> 00:18:36,880 Speaker 6: I mean, were you upset you? Did it take any 390 00:18:37,040 --> 00:18:38,080 Speaker 6: Did it take a toll on you? 391 00:18:39,000 --> 00:18:41,320 Speaker 8: I think I'm just like my stubborn self was like 392 00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:44,159 Speaker 8: they got me, Like it didn't upset me, but I 393 00:18:44,240 --> 00:18:46,800 Speaker 8: was just like, yes, of course I couldn't get away 394 00:18:46,800 --> 00:18:50,200 Speaker 8: that's so funny. Yeah, like so many people get away 395 00:18:50,240 --> 00:18:52,440 Speaker 8: with stuff like that, though. I mean like I was 396 00:18:52,480 --> 00:18:54,679 Speaker 8: a sophomore when that happens, so a little bit of 397 00:18:54,680 --> 00:18:58,640 Speaker 8: me was like, okay, just whatever, You're still an underclassman, 398 00:18:59,040 --> 00:19:02,159 Speaker 8: like this happens, maybe you can get away with it 399 00:19:02,240 --> 00:19:04,639 Speaker 8: junior and senior year if you really want to again. 400 00:19:04,760 --> 00:19:06,720 Speaker 8: But I just think some of it's kind of like 401 00:19:07,040 --> 00:19:09,639 Speaker 8: I didn't know anyone in the standards committee or like 402 00:19:09,640 --> 00:19:11,880 Speaker 8: the risk chair or anything. Like, I wasn't friends with them, 403 00:19:11,920 --> 00:19:13,879 Speaker 8: so they weren't going to like favor me like they 404 00:19:13,920 --> 00:19:14,960 Speaker 8: favorite their friends, Like. 405 00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:18,600 Speaker 6: Can you say that to them? Like can you say other? Really? 406 00:19:19,160 --> 00:19:23,240 Speaker 8: Well, I wouldn't personally, yeah, but I'm sure people wouldn't 407 00:19:23,400 --> 00:19:27,439 Speaker 8: like balls. People would, But I personally was just like, okay, 408 00:19:27,480 --> 00:19:30,240 Speaker 8: I'll write this letter like write worries. 409 00:19:31,080 --> 00:19:33,680 Speaker 6: Yeah, no, I get that. I get that just wasn't 410 00:19:33,720 --> 00:19:34,120 Speaker 6: worth it. 411 00:19:34,520 --> 00:19:35,720 Speaker 8: Yeah, it wasn't worth it to me. 412 00:19:36,600 --> 00:19:39,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, you know it's funny. I want to have my daughter, 413 00:19:39,920 --> 00:19:43,399 Speaker 2: come on, she has a story about standards. Well, I 414 00:19:43,440 --> 00:19:46,840 Speaker 2: should say we do, because she got called in to 415 00:19:46,960 --> 00:19:52,080 Speaker 2: standards her senior year for something that happened to her. 416 00:19:52,640 --> 00:19:55,560 Speaker 2: But instead of like there being any kind of real 417 00:19:55,680 --> 00:19:59,639 Speaker 2: talk with her or like what happened She just got 418 00:20:00,320 --> 00:20:02,200 Speaker 2: an email she had to go in front of standards 419 00:20:02,720 --> 00:20:06,080 Speaker 2: and really inappropriate because at some point you all are 420 00:20:06,480 --> 00:20:09,280 Speaker 2: grown women and your mommies should probably stay out of it. 421 00:20:09,600 --> 00:20:12,760 Speaker 6: But I completely lost my shit, and I knew it was. 422 00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:15,720 Speaker 2: Just like, there's no they haven't even heard what you 423 00:20:15,760 --> 00:20:17,200 Speaker 2: had to say, and standards. I guess she could have 424 00:20:17,320 --> 00:20:19,439 Speaker 2: told them what she had to say, but standards is 425 00:20:19,440 --> 00:20:23,399 Speaker 2: almost like you've done something wrong. Yeah, and anyway, so 426 00:20:23,480 --> 00:20:26,280 Speaker 2: I called, I guess I called the house mother. 427 00:20:26,359 --> 00:20:29,400 Speaker 6: What are they called, yeah, the house mother, house mother? 428 00:20:29,960 --> 00:20:32,960 Speaker 6: And this is completely unacceptable. 429 00:20:33,080 --> 00:20:33,240 Speaker 1: You know. 430 00:20:33,280 --> 00:20:35,760 Speaker 2: She was so upset because and I'm hoping that she 431 00:20:35,760 --> 00:20:37,040 Speaker 2: will come out and tell her story. I don't want 432 00:20:37,040 --> 00:20:40,280 Speaker 2: to tell it for her, but it was really something 433 00:20:40,320 --> 00:20:43,360 Speaker 2: that happened to her, and a really an awful thing. 434 00:20:43,880 --> 00:20:44,760 Speaker 6: Anyway, so. 435 00:20:46,640 --> 00:20:48,600 Speaker 2: I said, I don't really get this. These are the 436 00:20:48,640 --> 00:20:52,919 Speaker 2: whole point of this is that you meet these girls 437 00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:57,920 Speaker 2: and they become your sisters. First, like want to get 438 00:20:57,920 --> 00:21:01,120 Speaker 2: behind you, talk to you what happened before bringing you 439 00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:06,040 Speaker 2: in front of a disciplinary committee. It just seemed egregious 440 00:21:06,080 --> 00:21:10,040 Speaker 2: to me, and I was like just pissed. I was like, 441 00:21:10,040 --> 00:21:11,920 Speaker 2: what is this for if it's not to find people 442 00:21:11,920 --> 00:21:13,919 Speaker 2: that are going to be on your side, not for everything. 443 00:21:13,920 --> 00:21:15,480 Speaker 6: When you do something wrong, you do something wrong. 444 00:21:15,960 --> 00:21:19,320 Speaker 2: But she hadn't, and so it just made it worse 445 00:21:19,320 --> 00:21:21,760 Speaker 2: that she was getting called into Sanders. Needless to say, 446 00:21:22,320 --> 00:21:25,320 Speaker 2: they said, you're absolutely right, she doesn't have to come 447 00:21:25,359 --> 00:21:28,399 Speaker 2: in and thought what you did for them because I 448 00:21:28,440 --> 00:21:29,359 Speaker 2: was ready to go down. 449 00:21:29,240 --> 00:21:32,880 Speaker 8: There and yeah, they didn't want to deal with you exactly. 450 00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:35,720 Speaker 6: Good for Rachel too, because I would mortified her. But 451 00:21:36,160 --> 00:21:38,840 Speaker 6: I you know, I think that probably. 452 00:21:38,480 --> 00:21:43,159 Speaker 2: For a lot of young women girls that it is 453 00:21:43,200 --> 00:21:46,000 Speaker 2: really scary and it's intimidating, and I'm glad to hear 454 00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:48,480 Speaker 2: you guys just kind of sat or sit around a 455 00:21:48,560 --> 00:21:51,960 Speaker 2: round table. I think sometimes it's even more it's like 456 00:21:52,040 --> 00:21:53,680 Speaker 2: meant to be intimidating. 457 00:21:53,119 --> 00:21:57,440 Speaker 8: A little bit. Yeah, I think so, you know, mm hmm, yeah. 458 00:21:57,520 --> 00:22:00,480 Speaker 8: I think especially like just seeing your president and like 459 00:22:00,520 --> 00:22:02,840 Speaker 8: people who are supposed to be like risk chair and 460 00:22:02,880 --> 00:22:04,359 Speaker 8: all of that in front of your face. 461 00:22:04,920 --> 00:22:08,200 Speaker 2: So I mean I think that you know, you join 462 00:22:08,240 --> 00:22:12,879 Speaker 2: a sorority to be part of this sisterhood and to 463 00:22:12,960 --> 00:22:16,920 Speaker 2: know that all of these girls have your back right, 464 00:22:17,240 --> 00:22:19,040 Speaker 2: And I'm again I'm not taking away from the fact 465 00:22:19,040 --> 00:22:22,240 Speaker 2: that if you screw up and you are doing something 466 00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:25,880 Speaker 2: that is reflecting badly on your sorority, that there shouldn't 467 00:22:25,920 --> 00:22:27,000 Speaker 2: be consequences for that. 468 00:22:27,240 --> 00:22:29,280 Speaker 6: I absolutely know that that's true. 469 00:22:29,280 --> 00:22:30,680 Speaker 2: And even back in my day, even though there was 470 00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:33,880 Speaker 2: in social media, you know, there was like a love 471 00:22:33,920 --> 00:22:35,440 Speaker 2: you could get in trouble, you can get thrown out, 472 00:22:35,480 --> 00:22:39,520 Speaker 2: whatever it was. But I don't know, I feel like 473 00:22:39,760 --> 00:22:41,600 Speaker 2: maybe I'm a little biased because of what happened to 474 00:22:41,640 --> 00:22:44,600 Speaker 2: my daughter. But let's first like talk about it without 475 00:22:44,640 --> 00:22:47,679 Speaker 2: going to standards, you know, before we go to a 476 00:22:47,680 --> 00:22:51,800 Speaker 2: disciplinary committee, like what happened. Maybe not in your case 477 00:22:51,800 --> 00:22:56,240 Speaker 2: because if there was hard m I'm kind of giving 478 00:22:56,280 --> 00:22:58,679 Speaker 2: them the little fingers, the middle fingers, So maybe not. 479 00:22:58,760 --> 00:23:01,919 Speaker 8: Yeah, yeah, no, they definitely gave me warnings. But I 480 00:23:01,960 --> 00:23:04,240 Speaker 8: will say that is true because people who go in 481 00:23:04,280 --> 00:23:06,640 Speaker 8: there blind and like have no clue what they did. 482 00:23:06,760 --> 00:23:10,720 Speaker 8: Like that's intimidating, and that's got to be like who 483 00:23:10,760 --> 00:23:12,960 Speaker 8: knows what they're about to say to me, But like 484 00:23:13,040 --> 00:23:15,560 Speaker 8: would be the worst day of my life could be okay, 485 00:23:15,600 --> 00:23:16,439 Speaker 8: and you just don't know. 486 00:23:17,040 --> 00:23:18,280 Speaker 2: I mean, at the end of the day. The worst 487 00:23:18,280 --> 00:23:19,800 Speaker 2: thing that they that could happen is that they can 488 00:23:19,920 --> 00:23:23,360 Speaker 2: kick you out, right, Yeah, I mean I guess they're 489 00:23:23,400 --> 00:23:26,760 Speaker 2: also well I'm sure do you Priory talked about it. 490 00:23:26,760 --> 00:23:28,320 Speaker 6: But there's things that they can do. 491 00:23:28,520 --> 00:23:31,040 Speaker 2: I mean whatever, I don't know what in your sorority, 492 00:23:31,080 --> 00:23:33,880 Speaker 2: what are your what are the consequences? 493 00:23:34,400 --> 00:23:35,920 Speaker 6: There are probably a different levels. 494 00:23:35,920 --> 00:23:39,040 Speaker 8: I would think, Yeah, you could be on probation, which 495 00:23:39,080 --> 00:23:42,040 Speaker 8: I don't really know what those all entail, like with details, 496 00:23:42,080 --> 00:23:45,440 Speaker 8: but yeah, you could be on probation for a little bit, 497 00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:47,240 Speaker 8: or you could like not be able to go to 498 00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:51,680 Speaker 8: a formal, which is the fun part obviously, right right, right, 499 00:23:51,800 --> 00:23:54,240 Speaker 8: So they definitely have different consequences. I think mine was 500 00:23:54,280 --> 00:23:56,960 Speaker 8: like one of the lesser versions of what they do. 501 00:23:57,119 --> 00:23:59,520 Speaker 8: I know a lot of my friends who have had 502 00:23:59,560 --> 00:24:02,040 Speaker 8: to go also have to write hand written letters. So 503 00:24:02,080 --> 00:24:03,840 Speaker 8: I didn't think that was crazy that I had to 504 00:24:03,880 --> 00:24:04,119 Speaker 8: do that. 505 00:24:04,440 --> 00:24:05,200 Speaker 7: She was grateful for. 506 00:24:05,760 --> 00:24:07,479 Speaker 8: But yeah, they could have told me, like you're not 507 00:24:07,520 --> 00:24:11,600 Speaker 8: going to this next formal like whatever, But yeah, they 508 00:24:11,640 --> 00:24:12,320 Speaker 8: didn't do that. 509 00:24:13,200 --> 00:24:14,439 Speaker 6: Thank god. I'm so glad. 510 00:24:14,880 --> 00:24:16,359 Speaker 8: Yeah, that is the fun part. 511 00:24:17,600 --> 00:24:21,280 Speaker 2: Well, anything else any other ideas or thoughts about standards, 512 00:24:21,359 --> 00:24:22,200 Speaker 2: your experience. 513 00:24:23,560 --> 00:24:25,840 Speaker 8: I mean with me, that was the only time I've 514 00:24:25,920 --> 00:24:29,399 Speaker 8: gone I will say that like a girl. I know 515 00:24:29,640 --> 00:24:31,880 Speaker 8: we've talked about like shame and everything, and I don't 516 00:24:31,880 --> 00:24:35,399 Speaker 8: think that's their intention with everything that they do. So 517 00:24:35,440 --> 00:24:37,280 Speaker 8: I want to like take it with a grain of 518 00:24:37,359 --> 00:24:39,160 Speaker 8: salt type of thing, like I know a lot of 519 00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:42,359 Speaker 8: my friends who have gone through like emotional stress and 520 00:24:42,880 --> 00:24:45,119 Speaker 8: all of that get called into standards, which, like you 521 00:24:45,160 --> 00:24:48,239 Speaker 8: were saying with your daughter, that's not a great thing 522 00:24:48,240 --> 00:24:50,240 Speaker 8: that they're getting called into standards because it makes it 523 00:24:50,280 --> 00:24:53,240 Speaker 8: seem like they did something wrong. But when they actually 524 00:24:53,280 --> 00:24:55,640 Speaker 8: are in the meeting, standards will be like, hey, we're 525 00:24:55,640 --> 00:24:57,679 Speaker 8: here for you and we want to provide resources, but 526 00:24:58,119 --> 00:25:00,560 Speaker 8: to kind of get you in like an area where 527 00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:02,399 Speaker 8: we could all be with you. And this is just 528 00:25:02,560 --> 00:25:05,600 Speaker 8: like the protocol. So I know that they do definitely 529 00:25:05,640 --> 00:25:07,560 Speaker 8: help with that. They probably should go about it in 530 00:25:07,600 --> 00:25:09,720 Speaker 8: a different way and not call it a standards meeting. 531 00:25:09,920 --> 00:25:12,000 Speaker 6: But listen, I'm glad to hear that. 532 00:25:12,119 --> 00:25:17,800 Speaker 2: I really am you for clarifying that, because again, like 533 00:25:17,840 --> 00:25:21,119 Speaker 2: when I when my daughter went through it, I was like, 534 00:25:21,560 --> 00:25:25,199 Speaker 2: you're getting called into what, yeah, stand in front of 535 00:25:25,320 --> 00:25:29,400 Speaker 2: who I don't think so so yeah, no, I hear 536 00:25:29,400 --> 00:25:31,440 Speaker 2: you if it's if that is, I mean, I think 537 00:25:31,440 --> 00:25:34,080 Speaker 2: girls probably do still get scared, you know, oh yeah 538 00:25:34,359 --> 00:25:35,760 Speaker 2: for sure, which I don't. 539 00:25:35,880 --> 00:25:37,480 Speaker 6: I don't love. I mean, you should feel like you're 540 00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:41,400 Speaker 6: talking to your sisters, yes, you know, per se. 541 00:25:41,600 --> 00:25:44,000 Speaker 8: Yeah, you're also talking to girls your own age, Like, 542 00:25:44,600 --> 00:25:46,520 Speaker 8: I mean a couple of them were older than me, 543 00:25:46,600 --> 00:25:48,480 Speaker 8: like the president and stuff. But I was like, why 544 00:25:48,480 --> 00:25:50,800 Speaker 8: am I next to someone who I literally just rushed 545 00:25:50,840 --> 00:25:54,320 Speaker 8: with and she's telling me what my consequences? That's so awkward. 546 00:25:54,680 --> 00:25:55,440 Speaker 6: Yeah. 547 00:25:55,080 --> 00:25:58,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, Do you ever be on a committee on standards committee? 548 00:25:59,280 --> 00:26:02,000 Speaker 8: No? Because I don't think I could do that to 549 00:26:02,080 --> 00:26:05,320 Speaker 8: people that I'm like really good friends with. I don't know, 550 00:26:05,400 --> 00:26:07,959 Speaker 8: it's so awkward. And I've heard the stories of like 551 00:26:08,680 --> 00:26:11,680 Speaker 8: it gets complicated with friends and like if your roommates 552 00:26:11,680 --> 00:26:14,120 Speaker 8: with them, and it kind of gets weird, like are 553 00:26:14,119 --> 00:26:16,199 Speaker 8: you gonna do the same things that you would do 554 00:26:16,320 --> 00:26:19,240 Speaker 8: before they were on this committee? Like I don't want 555 00:26:19,240 --> 00:26:22,400 Speaker 8: my friends to have to like hold back from their 556 00:26:22,560 --> 00:26:25,560 Speaker 8: like lives just because I'm on this like committee, you 557 00:26:25,600 --> 00:26:26,080 Speaker 8: know what I mean. 558 00:26:26,280 --> 00:26:27,840 Speaker 6: I only think people would do it because it looks 559 00:26:27,880 --> 00:26:28,640 Speaker 6: good on your resume. 560 00:26:28,760 --> 00:26:32,040 Speaker 8: Maybe right, Yeah, it is great. It's a leadership position. 561 00:26:32,160 --> 00:26:37,040 Speaker 8: It probably does look really good on a resume, but otherwise, yeah, 562 00:26:37,280 --> 00:26:39,439 Speaker 8: I just wouldn't want like my friends or people to 563 00:26:39,560 --> 00:26:42,639 Speaker 8: not do or act as they normally would around me, 564 00:26:42,760 --> 00:26:43,560 Speaker 8: just because I'm like. 565 00:26:43,560 --> 00:26:46,560 Speaker 6: I don't want to do either. Yeah, yeah, I hear you. 566 00:26:47,560 --> 00:26:47,960 Speaker 4: Mm hmm. 567 00:26:48,000 --> 00:26:51,479 Speaker 2: Okay, well, Elizabeth, thank you, sweet girl, thank you for 568 00:26:51,520 --> 00:26:55,800 Speaker 2: coming on. I'm glad that you escaped a bigger punishment 569 00:26:56,119 --> 00:26:59,400 Speaker 2: and right and I could do everything. 570 00:26:59,000 --> 00:27:00,560 Speaker 6: And that you still go into the normals. 571 00:27:01,160 --> 00:27:05,160 Speaker 8: Yes, I am saying I'm trouble good for you. 572 00:27:05,560 --> 00:27:09,160 Speaker 2: All right, Well, thank you so much, and we love 573 00:27:09,240 --> 00:27:13,600 Speaker 2: talking to you. Thanks everybody gus listening. And girls, don't 574 00:27:13,600 --> 00:27:15,520 Speaker 2: post things that you don't want to get in trouble for. 575 00:27:16,560 --> 00:27:19,600 Speaker 2: That's the moral of this story. Okay, so now we 576 00:27:19,680 --> 00:27:23,800 Speaker 2: have Rowan Rowan. Hi there, how are you doing? Hi? 577 00:27:24,119 --> 00:27:25,040 Speaker 7: I'm good. How are you? 578 00:27:25,640 --> 00:27:28,400 Speaker 6: I'm good. I appreciate you calling in from abroad. Where 579 00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:28,679 Speaker 6: are you? 580 00:27:29,520 --> 00:27:33,119 Speaker 12: I'm in Portugal right now, but I study rod in Florence. 581 00:27:33,760 --> 00:27:34,040 Speaker 4: Wow. 582 00:27:34,119 --> 00:27:34,879 Speaker 6: How great is that? 583 00:27:35,400 --> 00:27:37,160 Speaker 7: Yes, it's amazing. I love it. 584 00:27:37,359 --> 00:27:39,200 Speaker 6: I'll bet do they have standards in Florence? 585 00:27:39,920 --> 00:27:41,360 Speaker 7: No, they don't good day. 586 00:27:41,760 --> 00:27:42,040 Speaker 8: Nice. 587 00:27:42,240 --> 00:27:45,359 Speaker 2: That's nice. That's a good thing. So Rowan, do you 588 00:27:45,400 --> 00:27:47,160 Speaker 2: want to share where you go to school? 589 00:27:47,560 --> 00:27:48,840 Speaker 7: Yes, I go to UCLA. 590 00:27:49,600 --> 00:27:55,320 Speaker 6: You're brainiac just a little bit, very nice, Okay. 591 00:27:55,320 --> 00:27:57,280 Speaker 2: So yeah, we've been doing a lot of talking about 592 00:27:57,320 --> 00:28:01,919 Speaker 2: standards and different young women experiences, so I love for 593 00:28:01,920 --> 00:28:02,920 Speaker 2: you to share yours. 594 00:28:03,320 --> 00:28:05,400 Speaker 7: Yes, of course I would love to share mine. 595 00:28:06,480 --> 00:28:10,520 Speaker 12: Basically, I this is my first time ever getting called 596 00:28:10,600 --> 00:28:17,080 Speaker 12: into standards for my sorority. I had been at a 597 00:28:17,119 --> 00:28:21,399 Speaker 12: frat event and I had just seen some stuff on 598 00:28:21,440 --> 00:28:25,359 Speaker 12: the internet that was funny about people stealing composites and 599 00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:29,320 Speaker 12: people I don't know doing silly things when they were out, 600 00:28:29,560 --> 00:28:31,919 Speaker 12: and I thought it would be funny to steal a 601 00:28:31,920 --> 00:28:34,560 Speaker 12: composite off of the wall because they were in the 602 00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:36,919 Speaker 12: middle of the hallway and no one was inside. Everyone 603 00:28:37,000 --> 00:28:39,920 Speaker 12: was outdoors, So I thought it would be funny, and 604 00:28:39,960 --> 00:28:41,719 Speaker 12: I was talking to one of my friends about it, 605 00:28:42,480 --> 00:28:45,040 Speaker 12: and she told me that I should do it, and 606 00:28:45,400 --> 00:28:47,360 Speaker 12: I was like, okay, but I don't want to do 607 00:28:47,400 --> 00:28:50,080 Speaker 12: it by myself, and she didn't want to do it 608 00:28:50,120 --> 00:28:53,280 Speaker 12: with me, and so then I was like, I mentioned 609 00:28:53,320 --> 00:28:55,760 Speaker 12: it to some one of my other friends and she 610 00:28:56,160 --> 00:28:58,400 Speaker 12: said that she was. She wanted to do it with me, 611 00:28:59,040 --> 00:29:02,479 Speaker 12: so we both just decided to pick one, a random 612 00:29:02,520 --> 00:29:08,000 Speaker 12: one close to the door to escape, and we ripped 613 00:29:08,040 --> 00:29:10,880 Speaker 12: it off of the wall and ran out of the house. 614 00:29:11,800 --> 00:29:16,200 Speaker 12: And then I was worried about getting I was worried 615 00:29:16,200 --> 00:29:20,200 Speaker 12: about stealing it and not returning it, like I wanted 616 00:29:20,240 --> 00:29:22,040 Speaker 12: them to have it back. I just thought it was 617 00:29:22,080 --> 00:29:24,160 Speaker 12: funny in the moment, so I left it on the 618 00:29:24,160 --> 00:29:26,840 Speaker 12: side of the road next to their house because we 619 00:29:26,840 --> 00:29:29,800 Speaker 12: were worried about I mean, they're pretty expensive, and I 620 00:29:29,920 --> 00:29:32,640 Speaker 12: was just I felt bad. There's people on it, and 621 00:29:32,760 --> 00:29:35,480 Speaker 12: people that their pictures are taken and stuff like that. 622 00:29:35,640 --> 00:29:37,680 Speaker 6: Year from my ear do you remember? Was it from 623 00:29:37,720 --> 00:29:38,520 Speaker 6: a long time ago? 624 00:29:38,760 --> 00:29:41,400 Speaker 12: I think the picture was twenty eleven, so it wasn't 625 00:29:41,520 --> 00:29:42,680 Speaker 12: too recent, but it. 626 00:29:42,600 --> 00:29:45,040 Speaker 6: Wasn't too old, okay, so it was like a. 627 00:29:44,960 --> 00:29:47,320 Speaker 12: Little in between. But we left it on the side 628 00:29:47,320 --> 00:29:50,640 Speaker 12: of the road. And then I think it got circular. 629 00:29:50,760 --> 00:29:51,520 Speaker 7: Someone found it. 630 00:29:51,480 --> 00:29:54,120 Speaker 12: On the side of the road and it got I 631 00:29:54,160 --> 00:29:59,600 Speaker 12: think it got maybe returned to them, But anyway, I 632 00:29:59,840 --> 00:30:02,320 Speaker 12: had i'd been a while and then I had received 633 00:30:02,320 --> 00:30:07,040 Speaker 12: an email from my sorority that had basically said it 634 00:30:07,160 --> 00:30:11,120 Speaker 12: said dear Rowan, you are called into a meeting with 635 00:30:11,240 --> 00:30:14,960 Speaker 12: standards for your actions at said frat. 636 00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:18,360 Speaker 7: Please meet with us at this time. 637 00:30:19,160 --> 00:30:21,400 Speaker 12: And that's when I started to freak out a little 638 00:30:21,440 --> 00:30:24,120 Speaker 12: bit because I had never been called into standards before, right, 639 00:30:24,360 --> 00:30:26,800 Speaker 12: and I did not know what to expect because I 640 00:30:26,840 --> 00:30:29,520 Speaker 12: was a freshman in college and it was something that 641 00:30:29,640 --> 00:30:31,840 Speaker 12: I was so new to that I was like, I 642 00:30:31,840 --> 00:30:33,600 Speaker 12: don't know how they're gonna punish me, Like, I don't 643 00:30:33,600 --> 00:30:34,800 Speaker 12: know how'm gonna get bined. 644 00:30:35,280 --> 00:30:36,480 Speaker 7: I don't know what's gonna happen. 645 00:30:37,240 --> 00:30:39,880 Speaker 12: And so my friend had gotten the same email, and 646 00:30:39,960 --> 00:30:44,680 Speaker 12: so after chapter we get called into this room. 647 00:30:44,840 --> 00:30:46,520 Speaker 2: Well, when she got the same email, did you guys 648 00:30:46,560 --> 00:30:50,920 Speaker 2: then think, okay, so this is probably about the composite. 649 00:30:51,200 --> 00:30:52,479 Speaker 7: Yes, I think, I assume. 650 00:30:52,560 --> 00:30:57,080 Speaker 12: Because it had said the fraternity's name, I knew that 651 00:30:57,120 --> 00:31:00,040 Speaker 12: it was probably in regards to this, and since we 652 00:31:00,040 --> 00:31:02,840 Speaker 12: both got the same email, we kind of connected the 653 00:31:02,880 --> 00:31:05,400 Speaker 12: dots and were like, this is probably what it's for. 654 00:31:06,400 --> 00:31:08,600 Speaker 7: They didn't stay specifically in the email. 655 00:31:08,680 --> 00:31:11,840 Speaker 12: I think what I was being called in for just 656 00:31:11,960 --> 00:31:14,520 Speaker 12: I was being called in for something, and then I. 657 00:31:14,520 --> 00:31:17,120 Speaker 7: Think they they mentioned it in the meeting. 658 00:31:17,800 --> 00:31:19,760 Speaker 12: Once I got there, they were like, this is why 659 00:31:19,800 --> 00:31:22,040 Speaker 12: you've been called in. But I in the email they 660 00:31:22,080 --> 00:31:25,280 Speaker 12: didn't say that got it, but I kind of figure 661 00:31:25,360 --> 00:31:27,720 Speaker 12: that it was right. Yeah, And then I went into 662 00:31:27,720 --> 00:31:32,440 Speaker 12: the meeting and they had basically asked me why I 663 00:31:32,520 --> 00:31:35,520 Speaker 12: did it, and I had explained that I it was 664 00:31:35,600 --> 00:31:40,120 Speaker 12: really sorry and I regret doing it, and that it 665 00:31:40,160 --> 00:31:44,680 Speaker 12: was I thought it was funny, but it was kind 666 00:31:44,680 --> 00:31:46,400 Speaker 12: of a stressful meeting. 667 00:31:46,440 --> 00:31:46,880 Speaker 4: I don't know. 668 00:31:46,920 --> 00:31:48,720 Speaker 12: And then I thought, and then they told me that 669 00:31:48,800 --> 00:31:51,160 Speaker 12: I had to write a letter to the fraternity president 670 00:31:52,360 --> 00:31:53,320 Speaker 12: to apologize. 671 00:31:53,680 --> 00:31:55,200 Speaker 2: But by the way, you have to forgive me because 672 00:31:55,200 --> 00:31:57,200 Speaker 2: at the beginning of this, I thought you had stolen 673 00:31:57,240 --> 00:31:58,960 Speaker 2: a composite off of the sorority house. 674 00:31:58,960 --> 00:31:59,880 Speaker 6: I didn't realize you stole it. 675 00:32:00,480 --> 00:32:04,880 Speaker 2: Now it is funny now, I think it's hilarious. 676 00:32:05,280 --> 00:32:07,200 Speaker 12: Yes, because if I had taken one out of the 677 00:32:07,240 --> 00:32:09,880 Speaker 12: sorority it would have been I think a little bit 678 00:32:09,960 --> 00:32:11,640 Speaker 12: less problematic because. 679 00:32:11,440 --> 00:32:13,360 Speaker 7: It would be my own house. 680 00:32:13,880 --> 00:32:15,680 Speaker 12: Because it was not my own house, so it was 681 00:32:15,680 --> 00:32:17,240 Speaker 12: a little bit problematic. 682 00:32:17,280 --> 00:32:19,160 Speaker 6: Okay, all right, I can't why you'd have to go 683 00:32:19,240 --> 00:32:23,760 Speaker 6: to standards for that. Yeah, nice move, thank you, thank you. 684 00:32:24,040 --> 00:32:24,560 Speaker 7: It was fun. 685 00:32:24,600 --> 00:32:26,080 Speaker 12: It was fun I thought it was funny, and I 686 00:32:26,080 --> 00:32:27,120 Speaker 12: still think it's funny. 687 00:32:27,400 --> 00:32:30,160 Speaker 7: Yeah, but the whole reason So when I. 688 00:32:30,080 --> 00:32:32,479 Speaker 12: Got into Standards, I at first was kind of like, 689 00:32:32,600 --> 00:32:36,800 Speaker 12: how did they know I personally did this? Like because 690 00:32:37,040 --> 00:32:39,920 Speaker 12: I was seen by nobody, Like no one had watched 691 00:32:39,920 --> 00:32:40,560 Speaker 12: me do it and it. 692 00:32:40,560 --> 00:32:43,680 Speaker 7: Was just me and my front No. I got caught on. 693 00:32:43,600 --> 00:32:47,800 Speaker 12: The security cameras outside of their front door and they 694 00:32:47,840 --> 00:32:50,960 Speaker 12: had a full video of us running out the door 695 00:32:51,000 --> 00:32:53,200 Speaker 12: with the It was a huge composite, like it had 696 00:32:53,240 --> 00:32:56,320 Speaker 12: to take of us to carry it, and it was 697 00:32:56,360 --> 00:32:59,160 Speaker 12: a It was a video of us like running out 698 00:32:59,160 --> 00:33:02,560 Speaker 12: the doors down the steps, and that's how I got caught. 699 00:33:02,560 --> 00:33:03,960 Speaker 7: And they had like pulled it up and were like 700 00:33:04,160 --> 00:33:10,200 Speaker 7: is this you? And it was me. But that's basically. 701 00:33:09,880 --> 00:33:12,480 Speaker 12: How I got caught and got sent to standards because 702 00:33:12,520 --> 00:33:15,240 Speaker 12: the frat, I guess, sent it and we're like do 703 00:33:15,280 --> 00:33:16,080 Speaker 12: you know who this is? 704 00:33:17,000 --> 00:33:21,040 Speaker 7: And it was me and my friend, which is crazy. 705 00:33:21,680 --> 00:33:23,120 Speaker 6: So what were the consequences? 706 00:33:24,200 --> 00:33:26,880 Speaker 12: I had been told I was going to get fined 707 00:33:27,480 --> 00:33:30,520 Speaker 12: and that I had to write a letter to the 708 00:33:30,560 --> 00:33:34,800 Speaker 12: fraternity president stating my apology, and it was two pages 709 00:33:34,840 --> 00:33:36,800 Speaker 12: long and I had to sign it and address him, 710 00:33:37,400 --> 00:33:39,320 Speaker 12: and then I was told I was going to get 711 00:33:39,360 --> 00:33:40,920 Speaker 12: fined and billed by the frat. 712 00:33:41,360 --> 00:33:43,320 Speaker 7: But I had never received. 713 00:33:43,040 --> 00:33:47,800 Speaker 12: That fine, like the billing from the fraternity, because I 714 00:33:47,840 --> 00:33:50,400 Speaker 12: found out that it was because they were too lazy 715 00:33:50,560 --> 00:33:53,920 Speaker 12: to actually send me the bill, like they just didn't 716 00:33:54,120 --> 00:33:56,000 Speaker 12: want to go through the process. 717 00:33:55,520 --> 00:33:56,880 Speaker 7: Of I guess billing us. 718 00:33:57,480 --> 00:33:59,280 Speaker 12: But it was going to be a crazy amount, like 719 00:33:59,560 --> 00:34:03,400 Speaker 12: five plus dollars because I think composites cost like two 720 00:34:03,440 --> 00:34:06,000 Speaker 12: thousand dollars, so we were gonna have to split the 721 00:34:06,080 --> 00:34:08,880 Speaker 12: fine and then it getting billed to us. But I 722 00:34:08,880 --> 00:34:12,640 Speaker 12: guess they never even they didn't I guess didn't care enough, 723 00:34:12,880 --> 00:34:14,959 Speaker 12: were too lazy, didn't want to send us the bill, 724 00:34:15,160 --> 00:34:17,600 Speaker 12: so I never got billed, but I still had to 725 00:34:17,600 --> 00:34:20,480 Speaker 12: write a letter, right, I still got sent to Stanford. 726 00:34:20,640 --> 00:34:24,000 Speaker 6: The boys never even sent you the bill. No, rat 727 00:34:24,000 --> 00:34:25,160 Speaker 6: boys are the best. 728 00:34:25,760 --> 00:34:28,360 Speaker 12: Yes, And I didn't have to pay five hundred dollars, 729 00:34:28,360 --> 00:34:30,440 Speaker 12: which was amazing for my bank account. 730 00:34:30,920 --> 00:34:33,360 Speaker 6: Yeah, from your bank account. You wouldn't have lost your parents. 731 00:34:34,040 --> 00:34:36,919 Speaker 12: No, No, I have not told my parents. They still 732 00:34:36,920 --> 00:34:38,000 Speaker 12: do not know to this day. 733 00:34:38,360 --> 00:34:39,440 Speaker 6: That would have been I don't know. 734 00:34:39,760 --> 00:34:41,560 Speaker 2: I think my kids would have told me and I 735 00:34:41,560 --> 00:34:44,120 Speaker 2: would have said, well, that sucks for you that you 736 00:34:44,160 --> 00:34:44,719 Speaker 2: have to pay it. 737 00:34:45,400 --> 00:34:46,440 Speaker 6: I still think it's funny. 738 00:34:47,000 --> 00:34:49,120 Speaker 12: Wait, yeah, I think my mom would have had the 739 00:34:49,120 --> 00:34:52,799 Speaker 12: same reaction of that sucks for you and you have 740 00:34:52,920 --> 00:34:53,400 Speaker 12: to pay that. 741 00:34:53,719 --> 00:34:56,640 Speaker 6: But yeah, yeah, you know it's kind of funny. 742 00:34:57,000 --> 00:34:59,759 Speaker 2: There are a lot of really kind of scary stories 743 00:35:00,000 --> 00:35:04,160 Speaker 2: scary standards, so I actually appreciate hearing this one. 744 00:35:04,000 --> 00:35:07,960 Speaker 6: Because it makes me giggle. It doesn't feel really that serious, 745 00:35:08,320 --> 00:35:08,880 Speaker 6: and it's. 746 00:35:08,760 --> 00:35:11,560 Speaker 2: Something that you would have absolutely done at your age, 747 00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:12,880 Speaker 2: and I would probably do it to me. 748 00:35:13,560 --> 00:35:16,520 Speaker 12: Yeah, and now you have a story, yes, exactly, a 749 00:35:16,560 --> 00:35:18,480 Speaker 12: story that I'll have for the rest of my life. 750 00:35:18,840 --> 00:35:20,440 Speaker 6: Yeah, thank you for coming on. 751 00:35:21,200 --> 00:35:23,239 Speaker 7: Of course, thank you for having me ate it. 752 00:35:38,239 --> 00:35:41,720 Speaker 1: All right, guys, now let's get into my standard story. 753 00:35:42,520 --> 00:35:47,760 Speaker 1: So my standard story is a little different than the norm. 754 00:35:48,440 --> 00:35:51,840 Speaker 1: It happened season eleven of Real Housewives in New Jersey, 755 00:35:52,080 --> 00:35:57,800 Speaker 1: which aired in twenty twenty one. So in that episode 756 00:35:57,840 --> 00:36:01,600 Speaker 1: of Real Housewives in New Jersey, my mom and Jackie 757 00:36:01,600 --> 00:36:02,480 Speaker 1: were arguing. 758 00:36:03,120 --> 00:36:05,439 Speaker 3: My mom heard a cheating rumor. 759 00:36:05,680 --> 00:36:11,000 Speaker 1: And Jackie goes, that's like me hearing that Gia snorts 760 00:36:11,040 --> 00:36:12,880 Speaker 1: coke in the bathroom att parties. 761 00:36:14,280 --> 00:36:17,839 Speaker 3: My mother flipped out like that was. It was obviously 762 00:36:17,880 --> 00:36:18,640 Speaker 3: like a. 763 00:36:18,560 --> 00:36:22,080 Speaker 1: Very insane statement to make, regardless if it was an 764 00:36:22,120 --> 00:36:26,400 Speaker 1: analogy or not, like you're talking about somebody's child and drugs, Like, 765 00:36:26,719 --> 00:36:30,120 Speaker 1: there was just a lot wrong with that statement, and 766 00:36:31,480 --> 00:36:32,319 Speaker 1: it blew up. 767 00:36:33,239 --> 00:36:34,240 Speaker 3: So twenty twenty. 768 00:36:34,080 --> 00:36:41,319 Speaker 1: One, it was my junior year of college and my 769 00:36:41,719 --> 00:36:46,040 Speaker 1: friend was on Standards and Zeta got wind of it 770 00:36:46,280 --> 00:36:51,200 Speaker 1: that this was out there, and they said to my friend, 771 00:36:51,719 --> 00:36:55,360 Speaker 1: do you think we should call Gia in to standards 772 00:36:55,600 --> 00:36:59,120 Speaker 1: to ask her one if I do coke in the 773 00:36:59,160 --> 00:37:01,200 Speaker 1: bathroom and two. 774 00:37:01,000 --> 00:37:01,800 Speaker 3: If she's okay? 775 00:37:02,280 --> 00:37:05,680 Speaker 1: If she's okay, It was just kind of there, Oh, 776 00:37:05,760 --> 00:37:08,000 Speaker 1: let's be nice, make sure that like her mental health 777 00:37:08,080 --> 00:37:10,239 Speaker 1: is in check. They really wanted to know if I 778 00:37:10,280 --> 00:37:16,279 Speaker 1: did coke in the bathroom, And my friend on Standards 779 00:37:17,320 --> 00:37:20,520 Speaker 1: looked at them and just basically said, this is a 780 00:37:20,560 --> 00:37:24,919 Speaker 1: bad idea. Gia is going to be so mad that 781 00:37:25,000 --> 00:37:30,480 Speaker 1: you are bringing her mom's show and something that didn't 782 00:37:30,520 --> 00:37:34,080 Speaker 1: involve her, but a comment was made about her, and 783 00:37:34,120 --> 00:37:36,880 Speaker 1: now you're bringing that into her. 784 00:37:36,800 --> 00:37:38,120 Speaker 3: College sorority life. 785 00:37:38,719 --> 00:37:41,360 Speaker 1: My friend knew that I was going to be so pissed, 786 00:37:42,080 --> 00:37:44,000 Speaker 1: so she warned me I was going to be pulled 787 00:37:44,000 --> 00:37:50,920 Speaker 1: into standards. I was pissed, and I'm sitting on this 788 00:37:51,040 --> 00:37:56,560 Speaker 1: zoom call with like a straight face, and they go, Gia, like, 789 00:37:56,640 --> 00:37:59,799 Speaker 1: we saw what was what has been on the tabloids 790 00:37:59,800 --> 00:38:02,280 Speaker 1: and what just aired on Bravo. 791 00:38:03,480 --> 00:38:04,439 Speaker 4: Do you. 792 00:38:06,600 --> 00:38:12,160 Speaker 1: Participate in doing the drug cocaine? And I was like, no, 793 00:38:13,520 --> 00:38:17,680 Speaker 1: I do not do coke. And they saw just how 794 00:38:17,840 --> 00:38:21,680 Speaker 1: like unfazed I was and how pissed I was, and 795 00:38:21,920 --> 00:38:24,960 Speaker 1: it kind of ended there. It was a very quick 796 00:38:25,040 --> 00:38:28,600 Speaker 1: phone call, but it just annoyed me. That's something so 797 00:38:28,760 --> 00:38:32,560 Speaker 1: avoidable and a very stupid comment that was obviously made 798 00:38:32,640 --> 00:38:35,080 Speaker 1: on The Real Housewives in New Jersey affected me in 799 00:38:35,120 --> 00:38:39,920 Speaker 1: my college life and just that people were talking about it. 800 00:38:40,280 --> 00:38:43,279 Speaker 1: And also the girls in my sorority knew that I 801 00:38:43,320 --> 00:38:46,160 Speaker 1: didn't engage in cocaine. They knew that I didn't do 802 00:38:46,239 --> 00:38:52,120 Speaker 1: the drug. So it was just such a crazy statement 803 00:38:52,400 --> 00:38:55,839 Speaker 1: and such a crazy question to ask me. You didn't 804 00:38:55,960 --> 00:38:58,920 Speaker 1: have to bring me to standards for that. It would 805 00:38:58,960 --> 00:39:01,440 Speaker 1: And they blamed it on NASH. They said that Nationals 806 00:39:01,440 --> 00:39:07,640 Speaker 1: got involved and wanted them to clarify and just ask 807 00:39:07,800 --> 00:39:13,400 Speaker 1: me about the topic, and I was like, also, you know, 808 00:39:15,040 --> 00:39:19,000 Speaker 1: if you guys really knew me, and they all were 809 00:39:19,040 --> 00:39:21,680 Speaker 1: out with me all the time at mixers day parties, 810 00:39:21,840 --> 00:39:26,400 Speaker 1: like you knew the girls that did drugs or you 811 00:39:26,920 --> 00:39:32,400 Speaker 1: like you just you knew. They knew that I never 812 00:39:32,640 --> 00:39:37,319 Speaker 1: participated in any of that. So that's what got me 813 00:39:37,360 --> 00:39:39,279 Speaker 1: even more mad, because I'm like, oh, what did you 814 00:39:39,320 --> 00:39:41,759 Speaker 1: guys just get off on asking me something that had 815 00:39:41,800 --> 00:39:43,920 Speaker 1: something to do with the Real Housewives in New Jersey. 816 00:39:44,360 --> 00:39:46,839 Speaker 1: I just thought it was a very immature move, very 817 00:39:46,840 --> 00:39:53,839 Speaker 1: immature thing, and they probably just were on their high 818 00:39:53,840 --> 00:39:56,160 Speaker 1: horse for a minute and got off on it, but 819 00:39:57,400 --> 00:40:02,359 Speaker 1: definitely annoyed me. But yeah, that was the only time 820 00:40:02,400 --> 00:40:06,320 Speaker 1: I got called to standards, and I was so upset 821 00:40:06,480 --> 00:40:11,560 Speaker 1: that I texted Jack E. Goldschneider about it afterwards, and 822 00:40:11,640 --> 00:40:15,160 Speaker 1: I was like, I just got called to standards because 823 00:40:15,160 --> 00:40:19,520 Speaker 1: of the comment that got that you made. And I understand, like, 824 00:40:20,680 --> 00:40:23,239 Speaker 1: this is a reality TV show and my mom did 825 00:40:23,280 --> 00:40:27,359 Speaker 1: something that hurt you, But I had nothing to do 826 00:40:27,480 --> 00:40:30,520 Speaker 1: with what my mom did to you on the show. 827 00:40:30,600 --> 00:40:33,520 Speaker 1: So I just didn't appreciate that you had to bring 828 00:40:33,600 --> 00:40:37,040 Speaker 1: me into your argument, and now it costed in me. 829 00:40:37,960 --> 00:40:40,719 Speaker 1: It was humiliating, you know, to be called to Standards 830 00:40:40,760 --> 00:40:44,040 Speaker 1: for something that I didn't do and that I would 831 00:40:44,239 --> 00:40:49,680 Speaker 1: never entertain or engage in. And I was like, this 832 00:40:49,800 --> 00:40:54,080 Speaker 1: is it. This is just unacceptable. And she obviously apologized 833 00:40:54,680 --> 00:40:57,520 Speaker 1: and she never wished for that to happen to me, 834 00:40:58,440 --> 00:41:01,839 Speaker 1: and yeah, now me and Jackie are fine and all 835 00:41:02,400 --> 00:41:06,960 Speaker 1: all is good. So this was our inside look into 836 00:41:07,360 --> 00:41:09,520 Speaker 1: what the life of Standards is. 837 00:41:10,520 --> 00:41:12,960 Speaker 3: I would say it's kind of a little. 838 00:41:12,680 --> 00:41:16,400 Speaker 1: Government that runs sorority life and keeps everything in check. 839 00:41:17,280 --> 00:41:30,160 Speaker 1: And that was it for this week's episode of Dirty Rush.