1 00:00:12,760 --> 00:00:14,960 Speaker 1: All right, So I'm laying in bed now. I'm doing 2 00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:19,600 Speaker 1: my first podcast in bed because I had a colon 3 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:24,360 Speaker 1: oscoby today and I don't know why I make everything 4 00:00:24,520 --> 00:00:28,120 Speaker 1: into something that's funny, because because what else are we 5 00:00:28,160 --> 00:00:31,440 Speaker 1: supposed to do? So last night no one talks about 6 00:00:31,480 --> 00:00:35,480 Speaker 1: colon osciby's. I've decided that I'm the person that should 7 00:00:35,479 --> 00:00:37,040 Speaker 1: be my name should be starting with a sea, which 8 00:00:37,240 --> 00:00:39,199 Speaker 1: all which we all know what we could name me. 9 00:00:39,280 --> 00:00:44,280 Speaker 1: But because caviar, chanel, chicken, salad, candy, my assistant me 10 00:00:44,360 --> 00:00:46,160 Speaker 1: had just pointed out that I'm the queen of the season. 11 00:00:46,159 --> 00:00:48,840 Speaker 1: Now colonoscoby is another sea. Because I don't know why 12 00:00:48,920 --> 00:00:51,680 Speaker 1: I felt that it was a good idea to post 13 00:00:51,880 --> 00:00:54,680 Speaker 1: a fit check for my colonoscopy, but it ended up 14 00:00:54,680 --> 00:00:56,360 Speaker 1: being a good way to say to people, you know what, 15 00:00:56,600 --> 00:00:59,480 Speaker 1: colon health is important. We get mammograms like your colon 16 00:00:59,520 --> 00:01:04,120 Speaker 1: is very import and it's literally where falla well my 17 00:01:04,160 --> 00:01:06,920 Speaker 1: phone keeps I'm a disaster in case anyone on this 18 00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:09,200 Speaker 1: listening to this podcast, so we might keep the shit 19 00:01:09,280 --> 00:01:11,960 Speaker 1: in as you know, what a shit show I am. 20 00:01:13,520 --> 00:01:19,000 Speaker 1: But it's important to think about your colon health. And 21 00:01:19,040 --> 00:01:20,400 Speaker 1: they tell you how often you have to get them. 22 00:01:20,440 --> 00:01:24,720 Speaker 1: There's a schedule. I'd gotten them in my thirties because 23 00:01:24,959 --> 00:01:28,480 Speaker 1: I have had chronic constipation my whole life, and in 24 00:01:28,520 --> 00:01:30,520 Speaker 1: my thirties they told me I had a long and 25 00:01:30,560 --> 00:01:34,160 Speaker 1: tortuous colon after a colonoscyby, like it's like a rollercoaster, 26 00:01:34,840 --> 00:01:40,880 Speaker 1: and that's why I had digestion issues. Now I take 27 00:01:41,160 --> 00:01:44,480 Speaker 1: these gummies, these grooons gummies that I have that are 28 00:01:44,520 --> 00:01:47,319 Speaker 1: in a little packet that the brand sent them to 29 00:01:47,360 --> 00:01:49,840 Speaker 1: me to try. And I first thought, it's just gummies 30 00:01:49,880 --> 00:01:53,400 Speaker 1: in a packet and they dose differently, meaning so you 31 00:01:53,440 --> 00:01:55,520 Speaker 1: have to take eight and I've been taking them and 32 00:01:55,600 --> 00:01:57,400 Speaker 1: I first thought, great, I'm taking my vitamins. But then 33 00:01:57,440 --> 00:02:01,640 Speaker 1: I was like thinking my digestion was like I was 34 00:02:01,680 --> 00:02:03,520 Speaker 1: attributing it to something else. And then I realized, it's 35 00:02:03,520 --> 00:02:07,080 Speaker 1: these gummies. And that's not even their main like claim, 36 00:02:07,200 --> 00:02:09,160 Speaker 1: like they don't talk about that. It's on the back, 37 00:02:09,200 --> 00:02:11,520 Speaker 1: but it's like that's a headline for me. So anyway, 38 00:02:12,280 --> 00:02:14,919 Speaker 1: and that got verified because today when I got my colonoscopy, 39 00:02:14,919 --> 00:02:16,720 Speaker 1: I'll tell you what they said. But so, all right, 40 00:02:16,800 --> 00:02:19,560 Speaker 1: so the prep is something that most people don't talk about. 41 00:02:19,600 --> 00:02:21,160 Speaker 1: If you know. If you've had it done, you know, 42 00:02:21,240 --> 00:02:23,120 Speaker 1: but if you haven't had it done, you don't. I 43 00:02:23,280 --> 00:02:25,360 Speaker 1: just learned in the comments that you could take pills 44 00:02:25,400 --> 00:02:29,800 Speaker 1: to do this. But basically the day before the colonoscopy, 45 00:02:29,880 --> 00:02:33,720 Speaker 1: you can only drink clear liquids. And that means like 46 00:02:34,200 --> 00:02:36,680 Speaker 1: you could do like they say, crystal light lemonade or 47 00:02:37,760 --> 00:02:42,960 Speaker 1: get clear gatorade, Italian ices. I got the liquid Ivy 48 00:02:43,040 --> 00:02:47,520 Speaker 1: grape flavor hydration packets and I think they had a 49 00:02:47,560 --> 00:02:50,760 Speaker 1: lemon lime because it comes out pretty clear. I did. 50 00:02:51,040 --> 00:02:53,520 Speaker 1: You can do apple juice. I drankle apple juice yesterday. 51 00:02:53,560 --> 00:02:55,520 Speaker 1: I did some like ginger kombucha because it was like 52 00:02:55,520 --> 00:03:01,079 Speaker 1: almost clear color. I did. It's important because they don't 53 00:03:01,120 --> 00:03:02,560 Speaker 1: give you all these options, and when you're doing it, 54 00:03:02,560 --> 00:03:04,120 Speaker 1: it's like overwhelming. You're like, I want to be able 55 00:03:04,160 --> 00:03:07,160 Speaker 1: to have things. I did lemon popsicles and Italian ices 56 00:03:07,960 --> 00:03:13,680 Speaker 1: and coconuts and coconut water, so and you know you 57 00:03:13,720 --> 00:03:18,080 Speaker 1: get so at night, for me, you could take a pill. 58 00:03:18,080 --> 00:03:20,000 Speaker 1: I don't know why some people choose the pill, but 59 00:03:21,040 --> 00:03:23,360 Speaker 1: at night they give you this powder and it was 60 00:03:23,639 --> 00:03:25,200 Speaker 1: you have to take it at like six o'clock and 61 00:03:25,240 --> 00:03:26,959 Speaker 1: you have to drink it within a certain period of time. 62 00:03:27,000 --> 00:03:28,880 Speaker 1: I think it's the first time, like within an hour. 63 00:03:29,280 --> 00:03:32,760 Speaker 1: You have to drink this sixteen ounces with this powder 64 00:03:32,800 --> 00:03:35,120 Speaker 1: mixed together, and it comes and it becomes almost like 65 00:03:36,760 --> 00:03:41,480 Speaker 1: a very sweet, slightly thick like syrupy. They call it free. 66 00:03:41,560 --> 00:03:43,560 Speaker 1: It doesn't matter a fucking flavor. It could be fruit punch, 67 00:03:43,560 --> 00:03:45,560 Speaker 1: it could be shit punch. It's it's not tasting like 68 00:03:45,560 --> 00:03:47,360 Speaker 1: fruit punch. That don't get excited. It's almost annoying that 69 00:03:47,400 --> 00:03:48,720 Speaker 1: they call it that because you're like, you can call 70 00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:50,760 Speaker 1: it fucking cotton candy and you can call a fuagras. 71 00:03:51,160 --> 00:03:57,119 Speaker 1: It tastes like syrupy medicinal aspar tame or something. It's 72 00:03:57,120 --> 00:03:59,240 Speaker 1: just like extreme and first to be like it's not 73 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:01,560 Speaker 1: that bad, but after it's just like, what are we doing. 74 00:04:01,600 --> 00:04:04,600 Speaker 1: It's just like drinking like a lot of bad cough 75 00:04:04,680 --> 00:04:08,360 Speaker 1: syrup or something, but it's not as thick. So you're 76 00:04:08,440 --> 00:04:11,280 Speaker 1: supposed to stay at home because you're gonna be using 77 00:04:11,320 --> 00:04:13,360 Speaker 1: the restroom because you're going to be cleaning out your 78 00:04:13,360 --> 00:04:15,240 Speaker 1: system because they can't look at your call and if 79 00:04:15,240 --> 00:04:17,080 Speaker 1: it's not cleaned out, and so that's why they tell 80 00:04:17,120 --> 00:04:20,359 Speaker 1: you like days before, like no blueberries, no seeds. There 81 00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:23,000 Speaker 1: are certain things that probably like interrupt whatever they're looking for. 82 00:04:23,040 --> 00:04:27,960 Speaker 1: They need like a clear view. So at six o'clock 83 00:04:27,960 --> 00:04:29,279 Speaker 1: you did it, and you're like, wait, it's not happening. 84 00:04:29,320 --> 00:04:32,400 Speaker 1: It's not happening. It's almost like a hash brownie in Amsterdam. 85 00:04:32,480 --> 00:04:35,560 Speaker 1: You're just like, it didn't kick in yet. So I 86 00:04:35,680 --> 00:04:38,440 Speaker 1: was like, and years ago I got one, Like I said, 87 00:04:38,440 --> 00:04:42,240 Speaker 1: I've had a few, and they said to me, I 88 00:04:42,279 --> 00:04:46,560 Speaker 1: went under anesthesia, went into it, we got out and 89 00:04:46,600 --> 00:04:48,800 Speaker 1: they're like, you have to come back. You're full of shit. 90 00:04:48,960 --> 00:04:51,279 Speaker 1: Like I had done the procedure or the cleaning process, 91 00:04:51,279 --> 00:04:52,960 Speaker 1: and I still was so full of shit, which speaks 92 00:04:53,000 --> 00:04:57,640 Speaker 1: to my constipation. Back then it was like not great 93 00:04:57,760 --> 00:05:01,520 Speaker 1: and speaks to now how how I'm doing. But anyway, 94 00:05:02,880 --> 00:05:05,400 Speaker 1: so and now I think back that I fucking went 95 00:05:05,440 --> 00:05:09,120 Speaker 1: and had to come back. That's a nightmare. That's a nightmare. 96 00:05:09,160 --> 00:05:11,080 Speaker 1: That was almost that's like me going to the Apprentice 97 00:05:11,080 --> 00:05:14,080 Speaker 1: for one whole week, becoming the runner up, not getting it, 98 00:05:14,120 --> 00:05:16,200 Speaker 1: and having to go back again. The most tortuous week 99 00:05:16,240 --> 00:05:19,279 Speaker 1: of my life, not as tortuous as my as my colon, 100 00:05:19,320 --> 00:05:23,760 Speaker 1: and it's not tortuous it's tortuous. I say tortuous. It's tortuous, okay, 101 00:05:24,200 --> 00:05:42,880 Speaker 1: like windy. So at six o'clock I drink this stuff 102 00:05:43,320 --> 00:05:45,320 Speaker 1: and nothing's happening. I go to bed, but I'm like 103 00:05:45,360 --> 00:05:46,920 Speaker 1: trying to stay up to see if I'm gonna have 104 00:05:46,920 --> 00:05:48,560 Speaker 1: to stay up because I'm gonna have to use the restaurant. 105 00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:51,000 Speaker 1: Nothing happens, So I go to bed really late, which 106 00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:52,360 Speaker 1: is also annoying because I know I have to get 107 00:05:52,400 --> 00:05:54,560 Speaker 1: up at five o'clock because I have to do more 108 00:05:54,600 --> 00:05:57,120 Speaker 1: of this. So I go to bed really late, and 109 00:05:57,839 --> 00:06:01,799 Speaker 1: two thirty it starts acting up a little, not crazy, 110 00:06:01,839 --> 00:06:05,240 Speaker 1: but a little. So then at five thirty and I'm thinking, fuck, 111 00:06:05,480 --> 00:06:08,800 Speaker 1: what if this prep doesn't work again? So at five 112 00:06:09,000 --> 00:06:10,560 Speaker 1: thirty you have to get up and you have to 113 00:06:10,640 --> 00:06:12,880 Speaker 1: drink the sixteen ounces with a liquid within a half 114 00:06:12,880 --> 00:06:17,360 Speaker 1: an hour. And I managed to do that, but that's 115 00:06:17,360 --> 00:06:19,560 Speaker 1: annoying because you're not guzzling. It's you're like up at 116 00:06:19,600 --> 00:06:21,600 Speaker 1: five o'clock in the morning, like just up for a 117 00:06:21,640 --> 00:06:24,360 Speaker 1: half hour. So I managed to do that. I managed, 118 00:06:24,880 --> 00:06:27,279 Speaker 1: and that then it was a little bit active, like 119 00:06:27,320 --> 00:06:29,880 Speaker 1: it was like oh God, and it's it's like it's 120 00:06:29,880 --> 00:06:33,040 Speaker 1: not horrendous, but you need to be by the bathroom. 121 00:06:33,360 --> 00:06:37,240 Speaker 1: So then I got back to sleep, slept, went in 122 00:06:37,600 --> 00:06:40,599 Speaker 1: and had and I did a fit check outside. I'm like, 123 00:06:40,600 --> 00:06:41,880 Speaker 1: what am I wearing? Because I wanted to be able 124 00:06:41,880 --> 00:06:43,359 Speaker 1: to say to the people like this what I'm wearing. 125 00:06:43,360 --> 00:06:45,720 Speaker 1: And oh, also it's important to go get a colonoscope 126 00:06:45,800 --> 00:06:47,880 Speaker 1: because of your health, and you know, you need to 127 00:06:47,880 --> 00:06:49,680 Speaker 1: know what's going on everywhere in your body, Like that's 128 00:06:49,680 --> 00:06:51,760 Speaker 1: a big, big part of your body that you should 129 00:06:51,800 --> 00:06:53,720 Speaker 1: know what's going on. And so you know, we don't 130 00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:55,919 Speaker 1: have to be squeamish about you know, I'm not a 131 00:06:55,920 --> 00:06:58,320 Speaker 1: potty humor person at all. I don't like any sort 132 00:06:58,360 --> 00:07:01,680 Speaker 1: of bodily discussions about things. I don't at all. This 133 00:07:01,720 --> 00:07:04,240 Speaker 1: is different. This is like medical and there are words 134 00:07:04,240 --> 00:07:05,919 Speaker 1: that I'm using and choosing for the way that I 135 00:07:05,960 --> 00:07:08,080 Speaker 1: talk about it because I want to get the message across. 136 00:07:08,520 --> 00:07:12,400 Speaker 1: So I do a fit check and I go there 137 00:07:12,400 --> 00:07:15,160 Speaker 1: and everybody's happy at this place that I was at, 138 00:07:15,400 --> 00:07:17,640 Speaker 1: they were so nice. It was in Stanford. I'm gonna 139 00:07:17,680 --> 00:07:21,440 Speaker 1: I posted about it, I think, and they got to 140 00:07:21,480 --> 00:07:23,680 Speaker 1: kick out of every single person they recognize me. Of course, 141 00:07:23,680 --> 00:07:25,920 Speaker 1: I'm not surprised. It's it's a lot of female nurses 142 00:07:25,960 --> 00:07:27,280 Speaker 1: in there and doctors, and they were like, I'm a 143 00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:28,680 Speaker 1: big fan. I'm like, great, you're gonna be up my 144 00:07:28,680 --> 00:07:31,000 Speaker 1: ass soon. But anyway, it was like it was a 145 00:07:31,040 --> 00:07:33,000 Speaker 1: good environment and I tried to make it fun. Like 146 00:07:33,080 --> 00:07:35,480 Speaker 1: everyone's so somber, you know. I did happen to see 147 00:07:35,480 --> 00:07:37,480 Speaker 1: a guy in shorts on the way in, which will 148 00:07:37,480 --> 00:07:40,440 Speaker 1: be discussed in dating X because I don't understand like 149 00:07:40,440 --> 00:07:43,000 Speaker 1: a man is maybe be wearing polo shorts, polo shirt 150 00:07:43,600 --> 00:07:45,960 Speaker 1: and shorts in fucking March, Like it's like the person 151 00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:49,480 Speaker 1: who rushes the convertible, Like we get it. Relax. So 152 00:07:50,320 --> 00:07:53,000 Speaker 1: I walked in and everyone's just so happy, you know, 153 00:07:53,280 --> 00:07:55,200 Speaker 1: like and I was like, let's make this positive, like 154 00:07:55,240 --> 00:07:58,200 Speaker 1: the MI ladies laugh, like why not? Why not make 155 00:07:58,280 --> 00:08:01,000 Speaker 1: kalmus could be experience positive. I like to make things 156 00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:04,480 Speaker 1: positive because we're gonna have miserable and miserable we're going 157 00:08:04,560 --> 00:08:07,200 Speaker 1: to have your fucking system cleaned out and looked at 158 00:08:07,360 --> 00:08:10,800 Speaker 1: and go under anesthesia, which I also find positive. Anesthesia 159 00:08:10,840 --> 00:08:12,880 Speaker 1: is a nap. We could slice it however you want. 160 00:08:12,920 --> 00:08:15,080 Speaker 1: It's a fucking nap. I wasn't not worried about, you know, 161 00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:17,080 Speaker 1: my lack of sleep buzz and I'm like, I'm getting 162 00:08:17,080 --> 00:08:18,800 Speaker 1: a nap of a lifetime. And they say it like 163 00:08:19,040 --> 00:08:21,760 Speaker 1: the effects of anesthesia are way deeper than sleep. So 164 00:08:21,880 --> 00:08:23,960 Speaker 1: like I don't know what that means and what scientists 165 00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:26,320 Speaker 1: figure that out, but like I don't know. So I 166 00:08:26,360 --> 00:08:30,480 Speaker 1: was jacked up. So I go in and I filmed it, 167 00:08:30,720 --> 00:08:33,480 Speaker 1: not the colonoscopy, but just like going into the gown, 168 00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:35,840 Speaker 1: just like making it stupid and funny whatever. And so 169 00:08:35,920 --> 00:08:37,840 Speaker 1: I got a kolonoscopy and she came out and she said, 170 00:08:37,840 --> 00:08:40,040 Speaker 1: you have two polyps. I don't really know what they're 171 00:08:40,040 --> 00:08:42,439 Speaker 1: like growths, they could turn into bad. They just gonna 172 00:08:42,440 --> 00:08:44,600 Speaker 1: analyze them and then they tell you later they buy 173 00:08:44,679 --> 00:08:46,720 Speaker 1: op see them. I think it is or But she 174 00:08:46,800 --> 00:08:49,760 Speaker 1: took them out and she said you have She said, 175 00:08:49,880 --> 00:08:53,520 Speaker 1: I like when we get confirmation of like medical things 176 00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:55,719 Speaker 1: that other people have said about you, like you get 177 00:08:55,720 --> 00:08:58,440 Speaker 1: a little attention. Does that make any sense? Like I'm like, okay, 178 00:08:58,760 --> 00:09:00,760 Speaker 1: I do have a long and torture and I have 179 00:09:00,800 --> 00:09:03,520 Speaker 1: a reason to have things that are different about what 180 00:09:03,640 --> 00:09:05,520 Speaker 1: I go through that get a little attention, Like I 181 00:09:05,520 --> 00:09:08,040 Speaker 1: also have very low blood pressure, get a little tension, 182 00:09:08,120 --> 00:09:10,320 Speaker 1: like I have drastically low blood pressure. We get a little, 183 00:09:10,320 --> 00:09:12,600 Speaker 1: we get little flex a little on that. So I 184 00:09:12,640 --> 00:09:15,079 Speaker 1: have low blood pressure and a long tortuous colon. I 185 00:09:15,080 --> 00:09:17,679 Speaker 1: get to put those on my resume. She said, it's 186 00:09:17,679 --> 00:09:21,240 Speaker 1: a rollercoaster. Yeah, I am special. So she then says, 187 00:09:21,360 --> 00:09:24,240 Speaker 1: but it looked pretty good like it was. It looked 188 00:09:24,240 --> 00:09:28,600 Speaker 1: pretty clean, and and she said to keep taking your vitamins. 189 00:09:28,640 --> 00:09:30,200 Speaker 1: And I felt like good about what I was doing. 190 00:09:30,360 --> 00:09:32,839 Speaker 1: I was like, yay. So anyway I did it, you 191 00:09:32,840 --> 00:09:34,280 Speaker 1: don't have to do for another four to five years, 192 00:09:34,360 --> 00:09:36,439 Speaker 1: some people to three. I don't know what dictates that. 193 00:09:37,080 --> 00:09:38,439 Speaker 1: I don't know what age, but if you do have 194 00:09:38,640 --> 00:09:43,400 Speaker 1: serious constipation or digestive issues, you should get one. Like 195 00:09:43,600 --> 00:09:45,920 Speaker 1: if you have issues I guess, I don't know, digesting 196 00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:51,559 Speaker 1: dairy or bloating and different things going on in your gut, 197 00:09:51,679 --> 00:09:53,319 Speaker 1: you should get a call on oscabay. So it's not 198 00:09:53,440 --> 00:09:55,520 Speaker 1: something that's just for older people. So that's just my 199 00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:59,760 Speaker 1: daily health report and my daily public service announcement about 200 00:09:59,760 --> 00:10:02,280 Speaker 1: your all health. And I feel good about myself. And 201 00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:06,079 Speaker 1: it's giving supermodel, it's giving de bloated, it's giving good 202 00:10:06,120 --> 00:10:09,040 Speaker 1: skin it's giving one day of clear liquids. I'm an 203 00:10:09,040 --> 00:10:11,839 Speaker 1: anti dumpster. It's it's I feel like I have a 204 00:10:11,960 --> 00:10:14,319 Speaker 1: cleaner colon than anyone else, and everyone's jealous of my 205 00:10:14,400 --> 00:10:17,240 Speaker 1: fucking colon. So I have a clean coll and you welcome.