1 00:00:05,480 --> 00:00:08,280 Speaker 1: It's the radio segment that's already pitching Hollywood a new 2 00:00:08,360 --> 00:00:12,360 Speaker 1: script idea. It's a sequel to the blockbuster hit Wicked, 3 00:00:13,119 --> 00:00:16,160 Speaker 1: called Wicked af the re wickeding. 4 00:00:16,600 --> 00:00:19,400 Speaker 2: What that's a terrible title. 5 00:00:19,560 --> 00:00:21,440 Speaker 1: No, dude, I thought it was gonna be called Wicked. 6 00:00:21,560 --> 00:00:24,560 Speaker 1: You thought it was Wicked before. It's even more Wicked now. 7 00:00:24,760 --> 00:00:29,000 Speaker 1: It's coming to theater soon. Get your pre pre order 8 00:00:29,080 --> 00:00:32,519 Speaker 1: in today with Laser Stories. The pre pre order a 9 00:00:32,600 --> 00:00:34,680 Speaker 1: good idea. The segment where we read weird news stories 10 00:00:34,720 --> 00:00:36,599 Speaker 1: around the globe, just like everyone else does, except we've 11 00:00:36,600 --> 00:00:39,800 Speaker 1: got a lasers that the Glenda Gottrocks just don't. This 12 00:00:39,920 --> 00:00:42,480 Speaker 1: first Laser story is out of the gift that keeps 13 00:00:42,520 --> 00:00:45,520 Speaker 1: on giving, which is Florida. 14 00:00:46,240 --> 00:00:47,599 Speaker 2: They've really been a star. 15 00:00:47,640 --> 00:00:52,120 Speaker 1: Thank you, Florida Stories. The Pink Pony Club is on fire. 16 00:00:52,880 --> 00:00:54,680 Speaker 3: I mean it has been for like what the four 17 00:00:54,760 --> 00:00:55,320 Speaker 3: years it's. 18 00:00:55,200 --> 00:00:58,760 Speaker 1: Been out, not the Chapelone song. There's an actual strip 19 00:00:58,880 --> 00:01:03,640 Speaker 1: club with that name in Tampa, or there was. And 20 00:01:03,760 --> 00:01:06,240 Speaker 1: I say that because the other morning, around six am, 21 00:01:06,360 --> 00:01:09,640 Speaker 1: police arrested a twenty nine year old man named Arvin 22 00:01:09,760 --> 00:01:14,160 Speaker 1: Solamanpour after he freaked out because the place was shut down. 23 00:01:17,800 --> 00:01:20,280 Speaker 1: I thought he was like, I don't like that song. 24 00:01:20,440 --> 00:01:22,760 Speaker 4: Yeah no, I mean when you have your favorite place, 25 00:01:22,800 --> 00:01:25,080 Speaker 4: you have your favorite place, it can be really sad 26 00:01:25,120 --> 00:01:25,680 Speaker 4: to lose it. 27 00:01:25,720 --> 00:01:28,080 Speaker 2: Brooks favorite strip club. 28 00:01:28,120 --> 00:01:31,440 Speaker 4: My favorite candle company just shut down, and I'm really sad. 29 00:01:31,520 --> 00:01:34,280 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, candle companies and strip clubs right on the 30 00:01:34,319 --> 00:01:38,480 Speaker 1: same lever. Apparently, Arvin showed up early that day though, 31 00:01:38,520 --> 00:01:45,240 Speaker 1: because he heard they had a brunch in lap dance promotion. Okay, yeah, 32 00:01:45,319 --> 00:01:47,360 Speaker 1: getting the lap dance while eating an eggs benny at 33 00:01:47,360 --> 00:01:52,080 Speaker 1: the same time sounds amazing, it does. They didn't have that, 34 00:01:52,960 --> 00:01:56,880 Speaker 1: so in his rage, he instead set the place on fire. 35 00:01:57,080 --> 00:02:00,800 Speaker 1: Oh my god, brother. The police were called, and when 36 00:02:00,800 --> 00:02:04,160 Speaker 1: they got there, they saw Arvin dragging some brush into 37 00:02:04,280 --> 00:02:05,160 Speaker 1: the burning building. 38 00:02:05,680 --> 00:02:07,360 Speaker 2: I'm because that fire. 39 00:02:08,160 --> 00:02:10,080 Speaker 1: You know you found an arsonist when you see him 40 00:02:10,120 --> 00:02:16,040 Speaker 1: adding kindling to the believing. He was arrested, and while 41 00:02:16,160 --> 00:02:19,520 Speaker 1: in custody, Arvin complained that he was thirsty, so cops 42 00:02:19,520 --> 00:02:22,400 Speaker 1: gave him a water bottle. He drank it and returned 43 00:02:22,400 --> 00:02:26,680 Speaker 1: the favor by relieving himself in the bottle and hurling 44 00:02:26,720 --> 00:02:28,800 Speaker 1: it back at the police. 45 00:02:29,360 --> 00:02:31,320 Speaker 2: I guess he wasn't a regular. They liked that the 46 00:02:31,320 --> 00:02:35,639 Speaker 2: pin they actually just move locations and didn't tell the 47 00:02:35,760 --> 00:02:36,280 Speaker 2: one guy. 48 00:02:36,720 --> 00:02:38,720 Speaker 1: After that, he was hit with a slew of charges, 49 00:02:38,760 --> 00:02:42,720 Speaker 1: including arson, battery on a police officer, and more. Cops 50 00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:45,320 Speaker 1: are still investigating and have no idea why he thought 51 00:02:45,360 --> 00:02:47,000 Speaker 1: the strip club would offer brunch. 52 00:02:48,280 --> 00:02:49,560 Speaker 2: It wasn't an actual promotion. 53 00:02:49,919 --> 00:02:53,480 Speaker 1: No, that's not even a thing. Something. You do not 54 00:02:53,560 --> 00:02:55,320 Speaker 1: want to be the guy that's going into the strip 55 00:02:55,360 --> 00:02:58,200 Speaker 1: club at nine in the morning. That's a bad start 56 00:02:58,240 --> 00:02:58,760 Speaker 1: to your day. 57 00:02:58,880 --> 00:03:00,400 Speaker 3: Well, I'm just gonna tell you you're not in the 58 00:03:00,440 --> 00:03:01,720 Speaker 3: A team at a nine am. 59 00:03:03,320 --> 00:03:06,600 Speaker 1: This next laser story is out of Detroit. What do 60 00:03:06,639 --> 00:03:08,400 Speaker 1: you do if you wake up one morning, go to 61 00:03:08,440 --> 00:03:11,560 Speaker 1: pour yourself a cup of coffee, and suddenly a cockroach 62 00:03:11,680 --> 00:03:18,200 Speaker 1: goes scurrying across the floor. Well, if you're fifty year 63 00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:21,760 Speaker 1: old Dale Johnson, you throw your shoe at it. And 64 00:03:21,840 --> 00:03:25,240 Speaker 1: well that might not sound crazy. We should note that 65 00:03:25,360 --> 00:03:28,680 Speaker 1: Dale's shoe also has a special holster with his gun 66 00:03:28,680 --> 00:03:34,280 Speaker 1: in it. He got a shoe gun. Holy crap, I 67 00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:37,040 Speaker 1: guess he must have moved up from Florida to Detroit. 68 00:03:36,720 --> 00:03:36,800 Speaker 4: So. 69 00:03:38,920 --> 00:03:40,520 Speaker 2: Detroit shoe gun. Come on. 70 00:03:40,760 --> 00:03:43,720 Speaker 1: See, here's the thing. The thing is Dale is in 71 00:03:43,720 --> 00:03:47,520 Speaker 1: a wheelchair and couldn't stop to crush the bug, so 72 00:03:47,720 --> 00:03:50,640 Speaker 1: he grabbed the next best thing, which was his shoe, 73 00:03:50,880 --> 00:03:53,920 Speaker 1: and threw it with the gun in it. However, he 74 00:03:53,960 --> 00:03:56,760 Speaker 1: did not plan on the firearm falling out of the 75 00:03:56,800 --> 00:04:00,240 Speaker 1: shoe mid air, hitting the ground, and shooting himself off 76 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:07,120 Speaker 1: in the shoulder. He immediately called the cops and was 77 00:04:07,160 --> 00:04:08,080 Speaker 1: taken to the hospital. 78 00:04:08,320 --> 00:04:10,320 Speaker 2: That's an embarrassing story to explain. 79 00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:13,760 Speaker 1: Good news is he's in stable condition and expected to make. 80 00:04:13,640 --> 00:04:14,800 Speaker 2: A full recovery. 81 00:04:14,920 --> 00:04:18,120 Speaker 1: Also, police took the opportunity to remind the public that 82 00:04:18,320 --> 00:04:22,000 Speaker 1: hundreds of other things rather than a gun, are much 83 00:04:22,080 --> 00:04:30,400 Speaker 1: safer to use to kill a cockroach. And now it's 84 00:04:30,440 --> 00:04:31,320 Speaker 1: packing heat, so. 85 00:04:31,279 --> 00:04:35,200 Speaker 4: Look out, bigger cockroach. 86 00:04:35,279 --> 00:04:40,119 Speaker 1: Rambo tables have really turned on him. This next laser 87 00:04:40,160 --> 00:04:44,360 Speaker 1: story is out of Leprechaun Lanes. Got any big Saint 88 00:04:44,400 --> 00:04:48,159 Speaker 1: Patti's Day plans? Today, a popular publication ranked the best 89 00:04:48,160 --> 00:04:52,160 Speaker 1: cities to celebrate in and yes, Boston is number one 90 00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:55,880 Speaker 1: against Chicago. 91 00:04:56,400 --> 00:04:57,480 Speaker 3: Chicago is at number one. 92 00:04:57,600 --> 00:04:58,920 Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean like the river. 93 00:04:58,839 --> 00:05:00,960 Speaker 1: Come on the river so well. They based this on 94 00:05:01,040 --> 00:05:04,200 Speaker 1: everything from beer prices to how many Saint Patrick's date 95 00:05:04,279 --> 00:05:05,320 Speaker 1: events there are. 96 00:05:05,400 --> 00:05:06,440 Speaker 2: Okay, Okay. 97 00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:10,480 Speaker 1: Now, Chicago was second last year, but it fell four 98 00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:12,000 Speaker 1: spots to numbers. 99 00:05:11,880 --> 00:05:16,719 Speaker 4: Second dude who did not plan the one beer crawl 100 00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:18,040 Speaker 4: that put Chicago down. 101 00:05:19,480 --> 00:05:25,320 Speaker 1: The new number two is Reno. But I think St. 102 00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:27,120 Speaker 1: Patrick's Day. I think Reno. 103 00:05:27,480 --> 00:05:30,200 Speaker 2: I have never thought that was You weren't even thinking 104 00:05:30,400 --> 00:05:31,039 Speaker 2: Vegas would be. 105 00:05:31,040 --> 00:05:35,160 Speaker 1: Bigger than Reno. Savannah, Georgia's three, Santa Rosa, California's four, 106 00:05:35,320 --> 00:05:39,320 Speaker 1: and Worcester, Massachusetts is five. 107 00:05:39,400 --> 00:05:41,280 Speaker 3: Montana used to be really high on that list. 108 00:05:42,080 --> 00:05:44,800 Speaker 1: In other Saint Patti's Day news, Panera bread is getting 109 00:05:44,800 --> 00:05:49,600 Speaker 1: green this year. Literally, they're selling green bread bulls at 110 00:05:49,640 --> 00:05:54,279 Speaker 1: select locations. God, look at the photo of it. The 111 00:05:54,320 --> 00:05:59,680 Speaker 1: inside of the bread is green, like. 112 00:06:00,160 --> 00:06:03,320 Speaker 3: Be like spinach bread, you know, like I think it's cute. 113 00:06:03,680 --> 00:06:06,400 Speaker 1: Really what's in it? It's filled with mac and cheese. 114 00:06:06,440 --> 00:06:10,960 Speaker 3: Oh God, is the best I know that picture. 115 00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:13,279 Speaker 2: The picture just looks like lumpy white things. 116 00:06:15,640 --> 00:06:18,479 Speaker 1: They're calling it their pot of gold, so it's supposed 117 00:06:18,480 --> 00:06:21,040 Speaker 1: to be like gold inside of the thing, but it's 118 00:06:21,080 --> 00:06:23,320 Speaker 1: gold macarone. Many people online say it looks more like 119 00:06:23,360 --> 00:06:24,360 Speaker 1: a pot of mold. 120 00:06:25,800 --> 00:06:26,520 Speaker 2: The pictures. 121 00:06:26,600 --> 00:06:29,800 Speaker 4: I mean, they could have hired a different food stylist. 122 00:06:30,520 --> 00:06:32,560 Speaker 1: It's sad that that's the best they could make it. 123 00:06:33,880 --> 00:06:37,680 Speaker 1: You know, they photoshop. They're also doing a pot of 124 00:06:37,680 --> 00:06:40,040 Speaker 1: Gold sweep Steaks where you can win free mac and 125 00:06:40,160 --> 00:06:44,320 Speaker 1: cheese for a year. As long as Brook doesn't win it, 126 00:06:44,320 --> 00:06:47,320 Speaker 1: then we're good. Walks in every day goes no things. 127 00:06:47,800 --> 00:06:50,880 Speaker 1: This next Lazer story is out of the Cardio Confessional. 128 00:06:52,080 --> 00:06:54,120 Speaker 1: There are a lot of reasons why people don't go 129 00:06:54,240 --> 00:06:57,320 Speaker 1: to the gym. I mean, it's expensive, it's not very fun, 130 00:06:57,440 --> 00:06:59,360 Speaker 1: they don't have the time, and so on and so on. 131 00:06:59,440 --> 00:07:02,840 Speaker 1: But there's one main reason to go to get six 132 00:07:02,920 --> 00:07:08,279 Speaker 1: pack abs. The new research looked into people's motivations for exercising, 133 00:07:08,320 --> 00:07:10,520 Speaker 1: and the number one reason people work out is to 134 00:07:10,560 --> 00:07:12,800 Speaker 1: improve their physical appearance. 135 00:07:13,520 --> 00:07:15,200 Speaker 3: Because if you look good, you feel good. 136 00:07:15,520 --> 00:07:17,640 Speaker 1: You know. Roughly twenty four percent of people do it 137 00:07:17,640 --> 00:07:20,440 Speaker 1: for that reason. Nineteen percent are hoping to improve their 138 00:07:20,480 --> 00:07:21,400 Speaker 1: physical health. 139 00:07:21,640 --> 00:07:23,840 Speaker 4: Yeah, and the older you get, the more you're like, 140 00:07:23,880 --> 00:07:25,840 Speaker 4: oh god, I don't want to die anytime soon. 141 00:07:25,880 --> 00:07:28,920 Speaker 1: And they're all connected, you know, right, And seventeen percent 142 00:07:28,960 --> 00:07:32,720 Speaker 1: are trying to boost their mental health for sure. The 143 00:07:32,760 --> 00:07:35,640 Speaker 1: top strategies to keep your gym routine going once you 144 00:07:35,680 --> 00:07:39,240 Speaker 1: start are forming a habit. I'm pretty sure that's ok 145 00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:40,120 Speaker 1: that's what That. 146 00:07:40,240 --> 00:07:43,679 Speaker 2: Is a terrible recommendation any habit. 147 00:07:43,920 --> 00:07:47,960 Speaker 1: Setting goals for yourself, okay, and finding activities that you 148 00:07:48,080 --> 00:07:48,680 Speaker 1: enjoy doing. 149 00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:53,080 Speaker 2: Oh, jeff for all those you can go to the 150 00:07:53,080 --> 00:07:53,960 Speaker 2: gym and eat. 151 00:07:53,840 --> 00:07:59,800 Speaker 1: Well, yeah, youel like like this guy for us, he 152 00:08:00,600 --> 00:08:03,480 Speaker 1: is not losing any weight, but the cardio this guy 153 00:08:03,560 --> 00:08:07,080 Speaker 1: gets in every day is like the usine bolt of 154 00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:07,520 Speaker 1: the pond. 155 00:08:07,720 --> 00:08:08,960 Speaker 3: Okay, good for his heart. 156 00:08:09,000 --> 00:08:11,640 Speaker 1: I guess not where people brag about speed in his position, 157 00:08:11,760 --> 00:08:14,080 Speaker 1: but you know what, good for him. That's how means 158 00:08:14,200 --> 00:08:15,880 Speaker 1: Laser Stories has come to an end for the day. 159 00:08:15,880 --> 00:08:18,240 Speaker 1: We'll do it again at the same time on Wednesday 160 00:08:18,720 --> 00:08:20,280 Speaker 4: Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.