Speaker 1: Is the Jesse Kelly Show. Let's have some fun on
Speaker 1: a Tuesday. It is a Tuesday, and well, we're gonna
Speaker 1: have a little bit of a roller coaster ride today.
Speaker 1: Walk with me as we go through a roller coaster ride.
Speaker 1: We have to talk about the firebombing of an anti
Speaker 1: abortion clinic. Didn't hear about that yet, did you? We
Speaker 1: have to talk about speak easies, why I want to
Speaker 1: go to one, and why there aren't any good ones anymore.
Speaker 1: Apparently New Yorkers are mad about that. We have to
Speaker 1: talk about Elon must thinking someone's going to kill him.
Speaker 1: He's probably right. We have violence from the left, suppose
Speaker 1: that violence from the right, and even Star Trek has
Speaker 1: been ruined all that. It would probably do some history tonight,
Speaker 1: just because I'm gonna mood on The Jesse Kelly Show.
Speaker 1: Before we get to any of that, though, I had
Speaker 1: a friend visit me. This was a couple of years ago.
Speaker 1: He doesn't listen to the show, so I'm comfortable say
Speaker 1: telling this story and not using his name. But I
Speaker 1: was friends with this guy during my childhood kind of
Speaker 1: high school years and we were very very close. He
Speaker 1: visits me, just hang with me a minute, comes to
Speaker 1: visit me. He's since gotten himself married and he has
Speaker 1: a couple of kids, actually two boys, almost identical to
Speaker 1: the age of my boys. And he's only in town
Speaker 1: for a night. So I do what I never do,
Speaker 1: and I allow him to stay the night at my house.
Speaker 1: He was on some financial hard time, So look, the
Speaker 1: Kellys don't stay with anybody, and we don't want anyone
Speaker 1: staying with us. That's how the Kellys are, That's how
Speaker 1: I grew up. It doesn't matter, it doesn't matter he
Speaker 1: stays the night. My boys are excited. Boys for some reason,
Speaker 1: are always excited about a new set of boys. Oh sweet,
Speaker 1: we'll get dirty with someone else. And I've never been
Speaker 1: more horrified in my life because my friend is he
Speaker 1: steal my friend and his wife, lovely woman, lovely woman.
Speaker 1: Their kids are monsters. And I'm talking about the kind
Speaker 1: of kids where she says, hey, don't spill that on
Speaker 1: their floor, because of course the kid was spilling something
Speaker 1: on the floor. Not a big deal, it's the floor.
Speaker 1: That's what kids do. And he said, shut up, mom.
Speaker 1: I'm looking at my buddy, thinking to myself, both my
Speaker 1: sons would be dead if they talked to their mother
Speaker 1: that way, and he lowers his head and just kind
Speaker 1: of shakes his head, like those kids. That was one
Speaker 1: of several things they did that night. Don't drink that soda.
Speaker 1: I will if I want to. You're stupid. And I
Speaker 1: remember going to bed that night, laying down with the
Speaker 1: old lady, not to bragg or anything like that. What
Speaker 1: Chris laying down with the old lady and saying, Oh
Speaker 1: my gosh, those kids are and I'm very angry. I'm
Speaker 1: angry on behalf of the kids, on behalf of my buddy.
Speaker 1: I'm like, how does that happen? And she says, well,
Speaker 1: I'm horrified too, But you have to understand, those are
Speaker 1: the rules that have been set for the children in
Speaker 1: the home. So don't be mad at the kids for
Speaker 1: playing by those rules. Now, what's this have to do
Speaker 1: with politics. Let's just have to do with what we're
Speaker 1: doing today. Well, I know you've seen the video. You've
Speaker 1: undoubtedly heard people talking about it all day, about the
Speaker 1: protests in front of the Supreme Court, justices Holmes, about
Speaker 1: the fact sam Alito has reportedly been moved to an
Speaker 1: undisclosed location, and it just got me thinking about parents
Speaker 1: and kids in societies, in rules and actually it made
Speaker 1: me take a little trip down memory lane. Do you
Speaker 1: remember last summer when the Antifa slash Black Lives Matter
Speaker 1: animals begin and burning down major American cities. We have never,
Speaker 1: just so you understand, we have never, at any point
Speaker 1: in the history of the United States of America had
Speaker 1: sustained rioting like that in that many different locations. Obviously
Speaker 1: there have been big civil unrest places like Watts and whatnot,
Speaker 1: never in that many different locations have we had such organized, sustained,
Speaker 1: costly riots. And do you remember do you remember how
Speaker 1: the American media covered it? In case you forgot, let's
Speaker 1: take a walk down memory lane. I want to be
Speaker 1: clear and how I chater is mostly a protest. It
Speaker 1: is not generally speaking unruly. That ain't a riot. What
Speaker 1: we're seeing right now in Minneapolis was they are strictly
Speaker 1: principled anti fascists, and they've taken a principal stand to
Speaker 1: stand against white supremacists and white nationalists wherever they may
Speaker 1: show up. I argue to you tonight, all punches are
Speaker 1: not equal morally. It says it right in the name Antifa,
Speaker 1: anti fascism, which is what they were there fighting. Let's
Speaker 1: and there's you know, no organization is perfect. There or
Speaker 1: some violence. Any reasonable person would say we shouldn't be
Speaker 1: destroying other people's property. But these are not reasonable times.
Speaker 1: I just want to let you know that goes on
Speaker 1: for another minute. I may play you the full cut
Speaker 1: later on in the show. But I love the sound
Speaker 1: of my own voice so much. Shut up, Chris, I
Speaker 1: had to cut in. Do you remember do you remember
Speaker 1: you probably remember this Chuck Schumer, obviously somebody who's gonna
Speaker 1: be familiar to you, New York Senator Chuck Schumer. Do
Speaker 1: you remember when he got up and he said this.
Speaker 1: I want to tell you, gor Zuch I want to
Speaker 1: tell you Kavanaugh. Okay, really quickly, can we talk about
Speaker 1: Chuck Schumer's voice, Mother of God? All right? Anyway, I
Speaker 1: want to tell you gor Zuch. I want to tell
Speaker 1: you Kavanaugh, you have released the whirlwind and you will
Speaker 1: pay the price. You won't know what hit you if
Speaker 1: you go forward with these awful decisions. Okay, all right,
Speaker 1: here's CNN's Laura Jarrett talking about protests out in front
Speaker 1: of Supreme Court justice's homes. And I do need to
Speaker 1: clarify something really quickly. It's against the law. Actually to
Speaker 1: protest in front of a Supreme Court justice's home. It's
Speaker 1: against the law. You can actually do a year in
Speaker 1: jail for it because it's the attempted intimidation of a justice.
Speaker 1: It's against the law. Here's Laura Jarrett on CNN, and
Speaker 1: this is a question about civility. The frustration people feel
Speaker 1: is personal. But where's the line? Obviously, what we see
Speaker 1: the apparent arson at an anti abortion nonprofit in Wisconsin
Speaker 1: is over the line. Violence is always over the line,
Speaker 1: but they're real questions and conversation today about protests outside
Speaker 1: Supreme Court justices houses, correctly justice capital, where do you
Speaker 1: think that line is? I think for a lot of people,
Speaker 1: a conversation about civility feels like it misses the mark
Speaker 1: when constitutional rights that you believe that you had for
Speaker 1: over fifty years are about to be overturned. The justices
Speaker 1: have security. So far, all the protests have seemed overwhelmingly
Speaker 1: non violent. There are plenty of protests that happen every
Speaker 1: single day in this country around the country at a
Speaker 1: boarding Okay, all right, so that's them defending it all right? Now,
Speaker 1: Where am I going with this? Back to my buddies, kids,
Speaker 1: my buddies kids are monsters. I'm sure they're twice as
Speaker 1: bad now. My buddies kids are monsters because they have
Speaker 1: that culture in their home. Remember, culture is just what
Speaker 1: is incentivized, and what is this incentivized. The truth is
Speaker 1: yelling shut up mom, and their home it does get
Speaker 1: you that candy bar you want, and my home it
Speaker 1: gets you a death sentence. Therefore, my kids never say
Speaker 1: shut up mom. Their kids say shut up mom all
Speaker 1: the time. We have changed something in the United States
Speaker 1: of America, and I don't think everyone fully appreciates what
Speaker 1: we have changed yet, and it's not changed for the better. Nevertheless,
Speaker 1: it is already changed. We are already there, the kids,
Speaker 1: you me, all of US American civilians, citizens. We now
Speaker 1: view political protests differently than we did even three or
Speaker 1: four years ago. We now have a new set of
Speaker 1: rules in this country where anything and everything is starting
Speaker 1: to get more and more acceptable. The effort to purge
Speaker 1: the country of Donald Trump created in this country a
Speaker 1: new set of rules. When's the last time, before the
Speaker 1: last year or so, you saw the right show up
Speaker 1: and get loud at school boards? You see it now?
Speaker 1: Have you ever heard of a Supreme Court opinion leaking early.
Speaker 1: Let me let me spoil it for you. Know you
Speaker 1: haven't because it's never happened, and then seeing organized protests
Speaker 1: at their home so bad one of them had to
Speaker 1: be whisked away to an undisclosed location. No, of course
Speaker 1: you haven't. I have news for you, and this is
Speaker 1: probably going to hurt a little bit, but I do
Speaker 1: have news. We are not at some low point in
Speaker 1: the country where we have reached the bottom. I've heard
Speaker 1: people say this, all right, well, this is the we've
Speaker 1: reached the bedrock. Ah man, this is the This is
Speaker 1: as bad as it gets. This is but the gentle
Speaker 1: beginning of what happens when the rules change. I am
Speaker 1: not trying to scare you, and I know we're gonna
Speaker 1: have fun. Look, hey, we're gonna have fun. Next we're
Speaker 1: gonna talk about speakeasies and stuff. So just hang with me.
Speaker 1: But we are in a different era now. We are
Speaker 1: in an era now where anything and everything has become
Speaker 1: permissible in the pursuit of what you want. It has
Speaker 1: for the left, and therefore that is now transferred to
Speaker 1: the right. The Press Secretary herself still won't condemn them
Speaker 1: opportunity to actually prophivid protest outside and private residence, even
Speaker 1: when peacefully. I'm wondering if any sort of demonetrations outside
Speaker 1: of private homes might run all up that law. And
Speaker 1: we're certainly not suggesting anyone break any laws. I would
Speaker 1: note that the president's view has long been and I
Speaker 1: tweeted this earlier this morning and repeated, and we're not saying. Look,
Speaker 1: we're not saying to break any laws. But if people
Speaker 1: are passionate, people are passionate. We are entering a different
Speaker 1: era in this country and it is not going to
Speaker 1: be gentle and it is not going to be good.
Speaker 1: But there is no stopping it. Now, well, I should
Speaker 1: say there's almost no stopping it. There's one thing that
Speaker 1: could change that. There's one thing that could stop where
Speaker 1: we're going. You want to know what that is, I'll
Speaker 1: tell you in just a moment before we get to that.
Speaker 1: Just know that I'm back. I see in a second.
Speaker 1: He doesn't care if you believe him, but he's right.
Speaker 1: Jesse Kelly was logan Yes The Jesse Kelly Show on
Speaker 1: a Tuesday. Don't forget. You can email the show Jesse
Speaker 1: at Jesse Kelly Show dot com, Jesse at Jesse Kelly
Speaker 1: Show dot com. Your love, your hate, your death threats,
Speaker 1: everything is welcome. We're an equal opportunity show around here, Chris.
Speaker 1: I know people think I'm not what we are. We're
Speaker 1: equal opportunity. That's because I am such a good person.
Speaker 1: Unlike you, Chris. I am all right. So what I
Speaker 1: was talking about. The rules have changed. They're changing rapidly.
Speaker 1: We haven't hit some bottom yet, not even close. The
Speaker 1: charity that's supposed to abortion is being investigated as arson.
Speaker 1: The words if abortions aren't safe, then you aren't either.
Speaker 1: We're spray painted on the walls of this office in
Speaker 1: Wisconsin before the building was set on fire with Molotov cocktails.
Speaker 1: They fire bombed an abortion, anti abortion office in Wisconsin.
Speaker 1: It's not the end either. This is the beginning. This
Speaker 1: is the beginning of a society separating and separating violently,
Speaker 1: and I do not believe it can be stopped unless
Speaker 1: one thing happens. And I think this is very very
Speaker 1: very unlikely. The only thing that could prevent us continuing
Speaker 1: to descend down this rabbit hole of nastiness. That's a
Speaker 1: good you know what, Chris, that's a good thing. Rabbit hole,
Speaker 1: what rabbit hole of nastiness. That's you would never come
Speaker 1: up with that. I just came up with that live
Speaker 1: on the air. That's not a very nice finger, Chris.
Speaker 1: That's whatever. Anyway, as we continue to descend down this
Speaker 1: rabbit hole of nastiness, the only thing that can stop
Speaker 1: it is actually nothing the government can do aimed at
Speaker 1: the people. The government must reform itself. And I realize
Speaker 1: that sounds impossible and ridiculous, but if you want to
Speaker 1: really stop where we're going in this country, we will
Speaker 1: have a government agency of some kind. I'm sure we
Speaker 1: already have plenty in existence, if not create a new one,
Speaker 1: dedicate itself wholeheartedly to a transparent public, drastic reformation of
Speaker 1: the federal government, especially things like the Department of Justice,
Speaker 1: the Federal Bureau of Investigation. Because what's happening now, the
Speaker 1: reason we're on this never ending downhill spiral now isn't
Speaker 1: necessarily just because of the communists and how violent and
Speaker 1: vile and nasty they are. We're heading this way now
Speaker 1: because the right no longer believes the traditional things that
Speaker 1: thought was on its side are on its side anymore.
Speaker 1: The right rightfully, man, That actually is not a good
Speaker 1: way to put that the right rightfully doesn't believe the
Speaker 1: Federal Bureau of Investigation is interested in digging into all
Speaker 1: these far left wing violent organizations. And they've admitted as
Speaker 1: much FBI, Black Lives Matter ANTIFA, Hey, FBI, what are
Speaker 1: you doing about that? Member? They added hearing and they said, oh,
Speaker 1: I mean, we don't. We're not really doing anything about it.
Speaker 1: The right does, however, continue to hear things like this.
Speaker 1: Capital police are warning the far right is calling for
Speaker 1: violence against a religious group planning to rally for abortion rights.
Speaker 1: Whitney Wild is live outside the Supreme Court. Listen seeing
Speaker 1: fences go up there. It's sort of like post January six,
Speaker 1: what are you seeing and what specific intelligence is warring
Speaker 1: if police officials, well, at this point, law enforcement sources,
Speaker 1: several of them tell us if they are closely monitoring
Speaker 1: social media chatter that suggests that there's a potential for
Speaker 1: violence against abortion clinic providers, abortion clinic staff, members of
Speaker 1: the judiciary that would include the justices here as well
Speaker 1: as members of the federal government. They're very worried about
Speaker 1: that right wing violence out there. What I'm trying to
Speaker 1: say is we're descending because the right no longer believes
Speaker 1: they have any official legal recourse. And if you deny
Speaker 1: people justice by traditional means, people will seek justice by
Speaker 1: non traditional means. That is not me cheering for it.
Speaker 1: That is me saying, beyond the shadow of a doubt,
Speaker 1: people seek justice, you give it to them through traditional means,
Speaker 1: althy'll find it other ways. I mean, I've brought this
Speaker 1: up before. It's going to sound like I'm changing the subject,
Speaker 1: and I guess in a way i am. But coronavirus,
Speaker 1: our coronavirus lockdown policies, they're not just launching America, they're
Speaker 1: launching the world into I mean, let's be frank, recession
Speaker 1: is now a given that's coming. We are potentially facing
Speaker 1: a depression, a gigantic global depression, depression, and it's because
Speaker 1: of COVID lockdown policies. Where's the accountability people out there?
Speaker 1: People listening to the sound of my voice right now,
Speaker 1: they're wiped out across the country. They've lost loved ones,
Speaker 1: they've lost businesses. We now have this new thing out
Speaker 1: sixty minutes, even though it's garbage. They're doing something out
Speaker 1: there about the teenage girl suicide epidemic. According to the
Speaker 1: CDC Hospital of Missions data shows the number of teenage
Speaker 1: girls who have been suicidal has increased fifty percent nationwide
Speaker 1: since twenty nine. Fifty percent nation wide. I cut that
Speaker 1: off a little early, but it was since twenty nineteen.
Speaker 1: People are looking around right now, someone listening to the
Speaker 1: sound of my voice lost their child to suicide during
Speaker 1: the last two years, or almost lost them. I know,
Speaker 1: because you write me emails and that parent justifiably wants
Speaker 1: to know what's going to be done to this person.
Speaker 1: It wasn't until early February when I was in a
Speaker 1: meeting that experts of the Foundation said, there's no way,
Speaker 1: you know, there's been too much travel without diagnosis for
Speaker 1: us to contain this. And then at that point we
Speaker 1: didn't really understand the fatality rate, you know, we didn't
Speaker 1: understand that it's a fairly low fatality rate, and that
Speaker 1: it's a diseased mainly of the elderly, kind of like fluids,
Speaker 1: although a bit different than that. So that was pretty
Speaker 1: scary period. I wasn't scared, and I knew exactly what
Speaker 1: it was because I had eyes. You're telling me, big
Speaker 1: fancy smart Bill Gates didn't and that human being and
Speaker 1: Fauci and State governments and federal governments and public health
Speaker 1: officials destroyed people. Where's the justice for people? Where's the accounting,
Speaker 1: where's the reckoning? We are descending into a dark period
Speaker 1: in this country because there is no longer any accountability
Speaker 1: ever for these people who ritually abuse the public. And
Speaker 1: if you don't ever hold them accountable, well, there's a
Speaker 1: shelf life on that. And once that shelf life expires,
Speaker 1: once that expiration date gets there, once the people have
Speaker 1: had enough, then it gets horrible and ugly. And I
Speaker 1: don't want that. If we want to avoid that, we'll
Speaker 1: do something. Now it's time to talk about speakeasies in
Speaker 1: New York. Why aren't they taken off? I'll explain it
Speaker 1: is the Jesse Kelly Show, Chris, what is this erosion
Speaker 1: to conformity? What is it? Corrosion to conformity? That was weird?
Speaker 1: I don't know what I look, I'm up in the
Speaker 1: air on whether I like it or not. I would
Speaker 1: need more. All right, hang on, let me get some
Speaker 1: gym beam and then we'll work this out. All right,
Speaker 1: hang on, you know, before we get to the speakeasy,
Speaker 1: let's just once let's check in. Let's check in for
Speaker 1: a brief moment, and let's see how well the uh,
Speaker 1: the psychopass who love abortion. Let's see how well they're
Speaker 1: handling things. This is a real person. Yeah, okay, we're
Speaker 1: doing well here, doing well. I'm a little creeped out,
Speaker 1: all right, And it's the Jesse Kelly Show. I remember
Speaker 1: you can email the show Jesse at Jesse Kelly show
Speaker 1: dot com. Speakeasies. First of all, let's do a little
Speaker 1: rewind here. The headline is this speak easies are hot,
Speaker 1: but jaded New Yorkers say they aren't the real thing.
Speaker 1: Let's let's pause for a moment in rewind. Way back
Speaker 1: in the day in the United States of America, some
Speaker 1: genius decided that we should ban alcohol. Ban alcohol, and
Speaker 1: they did it. They actually passed an amendment. There was
Speaker 1: so much support for this, they passed an amendment to
Speaker 1: the Constitution to ban alcohol. Obviously, that was insane and
Speaker 1: that was never going to work, and people begin to
Speaker 1: find ways to circumvent the law. One of those ways
Speaker 1: was a speake easy. Now, I've been to fake speakeasies before,
Speaker 1: but a speakeasy essentially was a hidden bar. It's not
Speaker 1: more complicated than that. There's a hidden bar Why why
Speaker 1: aren't they Why aren't they taking off anymore? Let's let's
Speaker 1: pause for a brief moment and we'll come back to that.
Speaker 1: You know, I don't talk about this very much, mainly
Speaker 1: because anybody whoever starts to eat healthier or work out more,
Speaker 1: their first inclination is to tell you about it. And
Speaker 1: it is the worst thing in the world. You can't
Speaker 1: walk within fifteen feet of somebody who's dieting or on
Speaker 1: a new workout program without them telling you what it is.
Speaker 1: So I'm not doing that. But for the purpose of
Speaker 1: my story, I have to let you know started a
Speaker 1: new workout program a couple weeks ago. Shut up, Chris,
Speaker 1: It's going very well, going very well. Look, I don't
Speaker 1: want I don't want to brag, but I'm getting pretty big,
Speaker 1: all right, getting pretty big? Then, in all serious has
Speaker 1: start a new workout program a couple weeks ago and
Speaker 1: told the wife that I'm going to start making improvements
Speaker 1: on the diet. To stay with me, this is going
Speaker 1: to apply. I'm gonna start making improvements on the diet. Look,
Speaker 1: I'm never going to eat kale kale salads or whatever weodo,
Speaker 1: crap cheese, eating no I'm gonna stick with meat of
Speaker 1: some kind and lots of cheese. But I'm gonna make improvements.
Speaker 1: And I have made improvements. Has it been Look, if
Speaker 1: you witnessed my diet, would you think that's an improvement
Speaker 1: over something? Probably not. Nevertheless, it is an improvement. I've
Speaker 1: made improvements today. Actually, as we speak, I did something
Speaker 1: I've never done before. Me Chris Michael. We're here at
Speaker 1: the studio. We're loan. There's a cookie delivery service in
Speaker 1: my area. They deliver these gigantic cookies and they're glorious.
Speaker 1: They're made fresh, and that's their business model. They make
Speaker 1: these huge, perfect cookies and they deliver them. I just
Speaker 1: ordered these cookies and I ordered them delivered to the
Speaker 1: studio for me and the fellas to feast on. And
Speaker 1: I'm so excited about it. Why because it's forbidden. It's
Speaker 1: not just because they're cookies. It's because they're forbidden. Look,
Speaker 1: you can call it the fallen part of human nature,
Speaker 1: and undoubtedly it is. But the truth is the human
Speaker 1: mind wants, at least part of it wants what it's
Speaker 1: not allowed to have. You can create as many fake
Speaker 1: speakeasies in New York as you want, and you can
Speaker 1: have people dressed up in nineteen twenties attire, and they do,
Speaker 1: and you can have these speakeasies. They're actually cool, Chris,
Speaker 1: you'd enjoy them. Where you need to have the password
Speaker 1: before they let you in. I mean, it's straight out
Speaker 1: of the movies where you you knock on this kind
Speaker 1: of nondescript or you have to know where it is,
Speaker 1: and they'll open up the slot. What's the password? And
Speaker 1: of course you end up getting the password if you
Speaker 1: know some people in New York, as I do. And
Speaker 1: it's fun and it's fine. It's not better than the
Speaker 1: dive bar up the road, though, why because it's not
Speaker 1: forbidden anymore. It's not forbidden. You can't have the speak
Speaker 1: easy unless you aren't constantly given even the door a
Speaker 1: little bit of the side eye, wondering if the NYPD's
Speaker 1: gonna bang down the door and throw everyone in cuffs. What, Chris,
Speaker 1: what if they had Cubans in there? I like Cubans.
Speaker 1: Cuban chicks are dimes. All cigars, oh, I mean know
Speaker 1: those even really that illegal? Who a Cuban city? You
Speaker 1: know what Cuban cigars are. Cuban cigars are the thing
Speaker 1: law abiding citizen guy. It's the thing he does to
Speaker 1: feel like an outlaw. The guy who works forty fifty
Speaker 1: hours a Week's he works forty fifty hours a week,
Speaker 1: putting food on the table, keep keeping clothes on, his
Speaker 1: kids back his old lady's got some fresh flowers every
Speaker 1: now and then. He drives a ten year old car.
Speaker 1: He's the definition of responsible right. Ten percent every single
Speaker 1: month goes to his investment portfolio. But he just wants
Speaker 1: to feel like a Hell's angel for one day, so
Speaker 1: he gets some Cubans. Have I ever smoked a Cuban? Yeah, Chris,
Speaker 1: I have a couple of the house right now. Are
Speaker 1: they better? No? Absolutely not. They taste better because they're forbidden.
Speaker 1: It's funny you brought up cubans. I have a buddy
Speaker 1: and me and I've actually had this argument before because
Speaker 1: he has a line on some Cubans and he gets
Speaker 1: them regularly. And what I don't. I'm not a huge
Speaker 1: cigar guy, but I'll puff on a cigar, especially if
Speaker 1: I'm at a party of some kind where everyone's smoking
Speaker 1: cigarettes or something like that. I'll enjoy a cigar. Or
Speaker 1: if I'm out golf it or something like that I'll
Speaker 1: enjoy a cigar. And I've had Cubans, and every time
Speaker 1: I have one, every single time, I like that bad
Speaker 1: boy up and I think, man, this is going to
Speaker 1: be so much better than those other cigars I've had.
Speaker 1: And every time I'll honestly, the first puff or tooth
Speaker 1: tastes like it. It's oh man, you can watch to
Speaker 1: see why these are forbidden. They're not better. Do you
Speaker 1: realize after a few puffs it's the same same thing
Speaker 1: you've been puffing on over and over again. So sorry,
Speaker 1: New York, you're mad that speakeasies aren't quite don't quite
Speaker 1: have the spice they used to. You need to ban
Speaker 1: alcohol if you want them to have the spice. That look, hey,
Speaker 1: if you're listening to me in New York City right now,
Speaker 1: isn't life spicy enough? All right? That reminds me. Did
Speaker 1: I ever tell you about my illegal bar story in Okinawa? Chris? Oh,
Speaker 1: I've never all right. I think it's probably been a while.
Speaker 1: Maybe you forgot because you're stupid, So I had all right,
Speaker 1: let me explain something here before I get into my story.
Speaker 1: And yes, I'm gonna get back to all the politics
Speaker 1: here and all the abortion stuff and Supreme Chords stuff,
Speaker 1: and Ukraine is back in the news and there's something
Speaker 1: you creepy there, and Chuck Todd's getting fired and all
Speaker 1: kinds of other great stuff. But before you get to that,
Speaker 1: Before we get to that, I'm gonna talk first about me,
Speaker 1: what Chris, I'm gonna talk about me. When I was
Speaker 1: in the Marines, we would do and I still think
Speaker 1: this is something they do, but I don't know. The
Speaker 1: whole combat Iraq Afghanistan thing. I know screwed this up
Speaker 1: a lot. We would do six months deployments overseas before
Speaker 1: there was combat. You just go and I've told you
Speaker 1: this before. The one I did before Iraq kicked off,
Speaker 1: which screwed up my second one, dang it. The one
Speaker 1: I did was Okaawa and we went to an illegal
Speaker 1: bar there and I threw up. And I'll explain exactly
Speaker 1: what happened in just a moment. Before I get to that,
Speaker 1: we were just talking about how skizy and nasty the
Speaker 1: world is, how dangerous it is. That's not going to change.
Speaker 1: I mean, I opened up the show talking about how
Speaker 1: we are descending. We don't have to celebrate it. Sure
Speaker 1: you're not happy we do have to be prepared though, right,
Speaker 1: do you have a Hero gun yet? Does your wife?
Speaker 1: Does your husband? Does? Your mom? Who lives alone? Now
Speaker 1: that daughter you sent off to college? Do they have
Speaker 1: Hero guns? It's a non lethal gun. I don't want
Speaker 1: to hear any Oh, they're not a gun guy, she's
Speaker 1: not a gun girl. No, I don't want to hear
Speaker 1: any excuses. This is a non lethal gun. It might
Speaker 1: save your life or the life of the person you
Speaker 1: love the most. Shoots a pepperball one hundred miles per hour.
Speaker 1: It'll stop someone in their tracks when this thing explodes
Speaker 1: on them. Trust me on that. Anyone can use it. Anyone.
Speaker 1: It's got a laser sight. You point and squeeze. It's
Speaker 1: that easy. You don't need some fancy concealed carry permits.
Speaker 1: And there's a discount code you get a discount. Go
Speaker 1: to Hero twenty twenty dot com and use the code
Speaker 1: Jesse and that gets you a special discount Hero twenty
Speaker 1: twenty dot com code Jesse. Oh God, an animally side
Speaker 1: on me. Jesse Kelly, don't listening to the Jesse Kelly Show.
Speaker 1: It is the Jesse Kelly Show. And no Chris, no
Speaker 1: care oky for me. I don't want Look, I'm so
Speaker 1: multi talented. I don't want to show off my voice. Chris, Now,
Speaker 1: in all seriousness, I have the worst voice we Kelly's.
Speaker 1: By the way, it's the Jesse Kelly Show. You can
Speaker 1: email the show Jesse at Jesse Kelly show dot com.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go on to my story here. In just
Speaker 1: a moment, we were talking about the forbidden and speakeasies
Speaker 1: in New York and whatnot. But just really briefly, the
Speaker 1: Kellys don't have any real artistic talent, and I mean
Speaker 1: nobody in the family. We're a bit more of a
Speaker 1: construction russ spelt type family. It's no Chris, I didn't
Speaker 1: say I wasn't talented. Okay, all right. I finished in
Speaker 1: the top two thirds of my high school class. I'll
Speaker 1: have you know. I'm uber talented. The point is the
Speaker 1: Kellys don't sing, they don't draw, they don't play musical instruments,
Speaker 1: they don't dance. We don't have any of those abilities.
Speaker 1: The wife, the wife won't even dance with me anymore.
Speaker 1: You know what she says. It's like telling me this
Speaker 1: isn't rude. She says, it's like dancing with a grizzly bear.
Speaker 1: That's not very nice, she says. She accuses me, Chris,
Speaker 1: of trying to take charge only not knowing what I'm doing.
Speaker 1: That doesn't sound like me at all. That doesn't say. Look,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna reject that. I reject that. All right, shut up,
Speaker 1: back to my story. We're gonna get back to all
Speaker 1: the politics here in a minute. Okinawa Marines. We go
Speaker 1: over there for a six month deployment. And I've told
Speaker 1: you this before. Whenever you would go somewhere or be
Speaker 1: in the close proximity of somewhere in the Marines, they
Speaker 1: would give you a list, a list of things of
Speaker 1: places you weren't allowed to go, and they would give
Speaker 1: you the addresses, the names and addresses. I still remember it.
Speaker 1: It was amazing, Hey don't go here, here, here, and here.
Speaker 1: Well again, this is the Marines. You might as have
Speaker 1: just drive us there and drop us, drop us off.
Speaker 1: We go out one night and we are legally enjoying
Speaker 1: ourselves in Okinawa. We were, we were on the up
Speaker 1: and up. And then a couple cups of courage later
Speaker 1: for the fellas and we decide we should definitely go
Speaker 1: check out one of those places. Now ran because of course,
Speaker 1: that's when you want to go check out. And remember,
Speaker 1: some of these places were dangerous. Some of them were
Speaker 1: drug hubs, some of them were known to be organized
Speaker 1: crime hubs of the various Japanese Oh exactly, Chris, Well again,
Speaker 1: you might as well just take me right to the
Speaker 1: organized crime bar, because that's where I want to go. Anyway, Hey,
Speaker 1: are there any gangsters in here? Kind of a thing
Speaker 1: we go, We show up outside of this place and
Speaker 1: it's it's just like something you would imagine in your mind.
Speaker 1: We're on some street, some kind of side street in Okinawa,
Speaker 1: and you have to go not in a front door,
Speaker 1: not in a door, and then up some stairs to
Speaker 1: a second floor bar. You have to go off the
Speaker 1: sidewalk and go down these rocky stairs, and then you
Speaker 1: have to knock on the door. They open it up,
Speaker 1: and they decide whether or not they're gonna let you in,
Speaker 1: and they let us in, and I'll I don't think
Speaker 1: I've ever had so much fun in my entire life.
Speaker 1: One the place was full of criminals. But we look,
Speaker 1: we thought we were okay. There's three or four infantry marines.
Speaker 1: We look, we probably had way more confidence than we
Speaker 1: needed to have at the moment. So we go in
Speaker 1: and we're partying it up and on the stage, I've
Speaker 1: never broken the rule. That's turned out so well in
Speaker 1: my life. On the stage was the greatest band I've
Speaker 1: ever seen in a bar. Now, the band itself was
Speaker 1: probably just above average, but they had some guy. He
Speaker 1: was Japanese Jimmy Hendrix. I'm not even kidding. He had
Speaker 1: this long hair and like the stuff Jimmie Hendricks to do.
Speaker 1: You know how Jimmie Hendricks would pick up the guitar
Speaker 1: and play it with his tongue and play play it well,
Speaker 1: I don't mean just strumming on. He would play it
Speaker 1: with his tongue. That was this guy. And he was
Speaker 1: shreddned to Jimmy Hendrix songs all night long. And of
Speaker 1: course we were getting along with all the gangsters that
Speaker 1: everyone's buying everybody drinks and stuff like that, and it
Speaker 1: was so much fun right up until a certain point.
Speaker 1: You know what habu saki is. You don't know what
Speaker 1: that is, Chris, I would not recommend you find out
Speaker 1: in Okinawa. There are pit vipers, very poisonous, yes, they
Speaker 1: will kill you. And the Japanese, well, the Okanawans. Look,
Speaker 1: it's a real dispute whether Okanahwan's or Japanese. I'm not
Speaker 1: going into this. We're just gonna call it the Japanese
Speaker 1: for now to for simplicity's sake. They have figured out
Speaker 1: some kind of rice based drink that involves this pit viper.
Speaker 1: And look, you can image search it online if you
Speaker 1: want to see what it looks like. I'm sure they're
Speaker 1: out there. I'm sure an image search would show it
Speaker 1: to you. But this drink is not served in oh.
Speaker 1: I don't know a bottle bottles of it may exist.
Speaker 1: Do you know how you consume habusaki? There is a
Speaker 1: gigantic clear glass jar sitting there. There's a big opening
Speaker 1: at the top in this clear glass jar. I can't
Speaker 1: stress this enough. In this clear glass jar, there is
Speaker 1: an entire pit viper. Obviously he's dead because he's completely
Speaker 1: submerged in the alcohol. This one, if memory serves me,
Speaker 1: I don't know whether this is custom or not. This one,
Speaker 1: they had pride his mouth open so his fangs were
Speaker 1: sticking out. It almost looked like he was striking that.
Speaker 1: Maybe custom. I'm guessing it was custom. But the guys,
Speaker 1: the gangsters we were drinking with insisted that we go
Speaker 1: out and take our little cups and we dip them
Speaker 1: in the top of this habu saki and we down one.
Speaker 1: We did, and we were all three in the bathroom
Speaker 1: throwing up in about ten seconds after that. If you
Speaker 1: ever get the chance to take habu saki, I would
Speaker 1: highly recommend not doing. However, if the choice ever came
Speaker 1: between drinking another shot of habu saki or listening to
Speaker 1: Chuck Schumer's voice, I can't guarantee which way I would go.
Speaker 1: I want to tell you Gorzach. I want to tell
Speaker 1: you Kavanaugh, you have released the whirlwind and you will
Speaker 1: pay the price. You won't know what hit you if
Speaker 1: you go forward with these awful decisions. Who has a
Speaker 1: voice like that? My goodness? All right, we still have
Speaker 1: a lot to go on the Jesse Kelly Show. Elon Musk,
Speaker 1: of course he's been in the news. Elon Musk thinks
Speaker 1: somebody might try to kill him. I say, he's not
Speaker 1: necessarily wrong, and probably more importantly, almost undoubtedly more importantly,
Speaker 1: someone has a question by email. They have a very
Speaker 1: specific question about the FBI and what hasn't been released
Speaker 1: to the public, and I think this is something we
Speaker 1: should all dig into together, don't you All? That's still
Speaker 1: to come on the Jesse Kelly Show. Remember Jesse. At
Speaker 1: Jesse Kelly show dot com is the email address. Your love,
Speaker 1: your hate, your death threats, you're asked, doctor Jesse questions.
Speaker 1: All are welcome there and if you miss any part
Speaker 1: of the show, download the whole thing on iHeart, Google, Spotify,
Speaker 1: and iTunes on iTunes. A five star rating in a
Speaker 1: review about how handsome I Am is critical for the show.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go eat some cookies. Hang on