Speaker 1: Wind down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heart Radio podcast.
Speaker 2: Just the two of us. We can make it with
Speaker 2: jah Tra Yeah fine, okay, well this feels so weird.
Speaker 2: I know, it's like a a pregnant hole is missing
Speaker 2: right here so far.
Speaker 1: I know, comes closer, literally, come to you, tiny, come
Speaker 1: a little closer.
Speaker 2: I'm so used to.
Speaker 1: Hanging off the end like I do at night in
Speaker 1: the bed.
Speaker 2: You why do you hang off a minute?
Speaker 1: I don't like to be touched when I'm sleeping, Like
Speaker 1: you can touch.
Speaker 2: Man then Catherine ladies and gentleman's.
Speaker 1: Sleeping, and he gets closer and closer and closer. The
Speaker 1: dog gets closer and closer, and so I have to
Speaker 1: I'm basically off of my king size bed.
Speaker 2: You don't like being touched when you sleep?
Speaker 1: Do you?
Speaker 2: Like?
Speaker 1: Who can sleep with someone touching them?
Speaker 2: I can.
Speaker 1: That sounds about right.
Speaker 2: No, I mean I like my space when I sleep. Yeah,
Speaker 2: But I also like in the middle of the night,
Speaker 2: like sometimes like he'll like start rubbing my head, or
Speaker 2: he'll like grab my hand like and we'll like fall
Speaker 2: asleep like oh like like he'll grab my hand and
Speaker 2: then we like but it's like that's sweet in like
Speaker 2: the middle of the night. Oh yeah, like when when
Speaker 2: we toss our turn or something. We're both tossing her
Speaker 2: and turners.
Speaker 1: So you're like half asleep tossing and turning, and you
Speaker 1: are aware enough to grab and hold hands.
Speaker 2: Yeah it's kind of cute, right, I mean it's kind
Speaker 2: of cute.
Speaker 1: Definitely nothing I've ever done. It's so cute.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know I haven't done that before.
Speaker 1: Like, I just don't think i'd even be aware enough.
Speaker 2: To, Like, I think it's just like, Hi, good, I know.
Speaker 1: That's sweet. Hey, things she learned that.
Speaker 2: You didn't know, but you didn't know that you were
Speaker 2: bracing for, Like just.
Speaker 1: Literally this much of my bed between the dot he
Speaker 1: sleeps between me.
Speaker 2: How do you let your dog sleep in your bed?
Speaker 1: I'm obsessed with her, but she sleeps literally between me
Speaker 1: in your bed between my life.
Speaker 2: Do you let sleep on the couch?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 1: He only she only likes my bed. She doesn't get
Speaker 1: on the couch.
Speaker 2: That doesn't like gross you out.
Speaker 1: I mean I have to wash the sheets and stuff
Speaker 1: like real often.
Speaker 2: I just for some reason. I mean I used to
Speaker 2: be the persons. No, no, I used to be the
Speaker 2: person too, And I think a lot of people will
Speaker 2: agree with you way more than me one thousand percent.
Speaker 2: And I know that, but like once I had kids kids,
Speaker 2: like a dog just became a dog. You're not in
Speaker 2: my space. Get away from me, Like I don't want
Speaker 2: you on my bed, I don't want you on my
Speaker 2: couch like you stink.
Speaker 1: Yeah no, I don't disagree with all of that in general.
Speaker 2: Like I love Leo, love love him. I think he's
Speaker 2: an amazing dog. Lauren trained him, beautiful dog, he's a
Speaker 2: great dog. But you're not getting in my bed and
Speaker 2: we're not snuggling, like I don't want a dog dog
Speaker 2: snuggling with me, and rather, and again, I don't like
Speaker 2: falling asleep snuggling either. I like the random in the
Speaker 2: middle of the night like touch base, but like yeah,
Speaker 2: like we'll snuggle then roll over. I'm fine with that.
Speaker 2: But when it comes to a dog, like I used
Speaker 2: to have my Boston Terrier and Sophie too. Mia and
Speaker 2: Sophie would snuggle in between my legs. Now that was
Speaker 2: like twenties, Yeah, but I could not. Maybe like when
Speaker 2: the kids are out of my house and it's like
Speaker 2: my only baby, but I'm like I want to be
Speaker 2: left alone.
Speaker 1: So I do too, and I was the same way.
Speaker 1: But when I started having baby fever after Ramsey is
Speaker 1: when I got rosy. So she's the only one. So
Speaker 1: she was like my newborn, like my baby, and that
Speaker 1: treated her that way. And now she literally has to
Speaker 1: be up between my legs before we go to sleep.
Speaker 1: Any other dog, no, like Ranger doesn't. He'll get up
Speaker 1: on the bed sometimes will let him, like when he
Speaker 1: falls asleep at first. But like the puppy, you know
Speaker 1: in the crate, the big dog. I got a lot
Speaker 1: of animals, you.
Speaker 2: Know, I couldn't imagine. Yeah, I mean Alan's dog Alba
Speaker 2: is here Shooberman like. But some people have their big
Speaker 2: dogs like that sleep in bed and I'm like, this
Speaker 2: is like my only time to myself, like get out.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but like me and Rosie going there like by ourselves.
Speaker 1: She doesn't need anything like everyone else in my life.
Speaker 2: But I kind of do get that piece where it's like, hey,
Speaker 2: you know when the kids are gone or when the kids,
Speaker 2: like when you get that they're getting older, baby fever,
Speaker 2: you're kind of like, all right, you want to mother something, yeah,
Speaker 2: and like have it be your baby.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's where that's why we'll get there eventually.
Speaker 2: Make fine that.
Speaker 1: I mean he doesn't love it, but no, he doesn't
Speaker 1: really have a choice now. And like at one night,
Speaker 1: you know, because Rangers kind of had a harder time
Speaker 1: going to sleep at night. I mean like just put
Speaker 1: him in the bed. He's like absolutely not, Like there's
Speaker 1: no way we're doing two dogs in the bed.
Speaker 2: Like okay, no, how do you have like fucks with
Speaker 2: the dogs?
Speaker 1: She goes in the crate too, Like, so she sleeps
Speaker 1: really well in the crate too, so she'll go in
Speaker 1: the crate. So she goes in the crate and then
Speaker 1: we put her up on the bed or sometimes she
Speaker 1: she gets a little like she freaks out a little
Speaker 1: there for the Yeah, yeah, she freaks out a little bit,
Speaker 1: like what.
Speaker 2: Are you doing about that?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 2: I just couldn't have a dog staring me in the eye.
Speaker 1: Well that is uncomfortable. The cry and put the blanket
Speaker 1: over it.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I don't know how this came up or how we
Speaker 1: got there.
Speaker 2: Well, we always find a topic we do. So it's interesting, Well,
Speaker 2: did we talk.
Speaker 1: About why we're why we're alone?
Speaker 3: Oh?
Speaker 2: No, KB is having contractions. She texted and she was like,
Speaker 2: no dilation, but we she's contracting, so she is on
Speaker 2: Baby Baby Baby Watch good. Yeah, but we are very excited.
Speaker 2: We miss KB obviously, but we're excited because we have
Speaker 2: Shreihely coming on the show in a little in a
Speaker 2: little bit, so we'll get her on. But I do
Speaker 2: want to say thank you to everyone who have shown
Speaker 2: love for not only the engagement but the book too,
Speaker 2: Like it's been it's been so great. It's also been
Speaker 2: really fun to block people because the people that have
Speaker 2: just been I mean, here's I was gonna get a
Speaker 2: handful and that's okay, but like it's just been like
Speaker 2: I don't take any offense to any of it good
Speaker 2: or I'm just like it's so easy now just to
Speaker 2: be like boo blah. But no, I think I've only
Speaker 2: you know, normally where when I focused where I would
Speaker 2: always focus on the negative, I focus on the positive
Speaker 2: of like the things people were saying, and that has
Speaker 2: been that's been nice.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like you've gotten a lot, a lot
Speaker 1: of love and I'm very.
Speaker 2: I'm very sweet and I really appreciate it and I'm
Speaker 2: just like, yeah, with the engagement side of things, and
Speaker 2: then the you know, with the book, like it's just
Speaker 2: just feels I appreciate it, so thank you.
Speaker 1: I'm really glad to let me say that, like because
Speaker 1: a lot of times when you have announcements or new
Speaker 1: things and people want to attack and people like it
Speaker 1: can kind of get you down, you know, and like
Speaker 1: you you've been great from what I've seen, Like I haven't.
Speaker 1: You've just been awesome.
Speaker 2: I've laughed at the comments. Wow, like I just and
Speaker 2: then I'm like block because I don't need you to
Speaker 2: Well what's so funny though about some of these people
Speaker 2: like well, okay, so like on the engagement side, it's
Speaker 2: like I can't wait for her to be the victim
Speaker 2: of number four or you know what I mean, just
Speaker 2: like of like whatever, like whatever fine, or just being
Speaker 2: like mean. But then I'll go I'm like I wonder
Speaker 2: if they have messaged me before, and then I go
Speaker 2: to like the message like oh my god, I love
Speaker 2: you and like that looks so cool, or like like
Speaker 2: they're so nice.
Speaker 1: They're probably just trying to get attention no matter how
Speaker 1: they do it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so I was just like, well, block, but and
Speaker 2: then some were like you know, mean always I'm like, oh, block,
Speaker 2: Like yeah, because I just don't need your like negative energy.
Speaker 2: And then on the book side, someone was just like,
Speaker 2: she's like she just found love now she's writing about it.
Speaker 2: I'm like, where did you not read that? I said,
Speaker 2: this does not involve my new relationship whatsoever. People don't
Speaker 2: I say like one sentence because I went back and revised,
Speaker 2: like one day, I hope to find love. It's like,
Speaker 2: you know, I said like something about like finding love,
Speaker 2: like one sentence.
Speaker 1: People don't pay attention. They really don't.
Speaker 2: But I was just like, okay, whatever, bye, Well let's
Speaker 2: get schriy helium. Let's take a break.
Speaker 3: Hey, h hello, Darleene. It's so good to see you both.
Speaker 2: I know it's been a minute. Our middle pregnant mama,
Speaker 2: she's about to have a baby, so we you know,
Speaker 2: want any day now. So she's she's on maternity leave
Speaker 2: from Wine down. Oh rats, woman, you got me and Kat?
Speaker 2: How you been?
Speaker 3: Oh so good?
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I can't wait to talk about this topic with you
Speaker 3: because the last we talked, I think I told you
Speaker 3: that I was just going to date my face off
Speaker 3: and that I thought that the guy that I was
Speaker 3: with was my one, but then he wasn't right.
Speaker 2: And how long were you guys together for when, Like,
Speaker 2: how long did you guys date for? It was like,
Speaker 2: what was a seven years? So did I make that up?
Speaker 3: We had known each other since twenty nineteen, so it
Speaker 3: was like several years, but we didn't date that whole time, right,
Speaker 3: And I told you I thought he was it, yes,
Speaker 3: and then we broke up. But he is it, as
Speaker 3: it turns out.
Speaker 2: Okay, Wait, so let's go back. So you met in
Speaker 2: nineteen and then you dated for how long until you
Speaker 2: guys called it off?
Speaker 3: Well, we did it for like a minute, and then
Speaker 3: we got back together and dated for six months. Okay,
Speaker 3: but we've been friends for like three years.
Speaker 2: Right? What made you think he was the in the beginning?
Speaker 2: And then what made you guys break it off?
Speaker 3: He knew I was the one in the beginning, but
Speaker 3: I didn't why. And then I thought after that six
Speaker 3: months that he was it. But you know when when
Speaker 3: you know someone is your soulmate and there's there's like
Speaker 3: this deep, unbelievable connection, but there's stuff that they've still
Speaker 3: got to do. There was still growing to do. I
Speaker 3: had big therapy and work to do that first time
Speaker 3: that I met him, and then he took his turn
Speaker 3: and now we're amazing.
Speaker 2: So okay, So then you had the work too, like
Speaker 2: so you realize you still needed stuff to do. And
Speaker 2: then you guys were kind of like, wait a minute,
Speaker 2: like let's try this again.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, And then I broke up with him again.
Speaker 2: Why did you meet up with him? Tell me more?
Speaker 3: Why? Because I think he had work to do? You
Speaker 3: know the story of twin flames, you know when you
Speaker 3: when they say too. So many of us are being
Speaker 3: reconnected in this lifetime and I can't wait to hear
Speaker 3: about yours because we have we have this rule to
Speaker 3: play for each other where we really wake each other up.
Speaker 3: We advance each other and help each other learn. And
Speaker 3: that sometimes looks like coming together and then moving apart,
Speaker 3: and then coming back together and moving apart to do
Speaker 3: the work. But I feel like we've done that core
Speaker 3: work now so we can be together in a really
Speaker 3: healthy way.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 3: And that's something I so thought we'd talk about today,
Speaker 3: because it's that first healthy relationship after all the unhealthy ones, right.
Speaker 2: And I will say too on that piece, like when
Speaker 2: I look at my fiance now, I don't think we
Speaker 2: would have been right, Oh, I know, we wouldn't have
Speaker 2: been right for each other any years before that, like
Speaker 2: I would have met him even before my ex him
Speaker 2: and I both would have been not good for each other.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I still have so much of myself to do.
Speaker 2: He had stuff of his stuff to do. So it's
Speaker 2: like we would have not been We would have had
Speaker 2: a great romance and it would have been fun, but
Speaker 2: I would have somehow sabotaged it with my own past stuff.
Speaker 2: He would have had his own stuff, his you know,
Speaker 2: whatever it was, and so it would have never I
Speaker 2: don't think it would have ever worked until Like that's
Speaker 2: where I'm like, the timing of things is interesting, but
Speaker 2: I would But then I go to Catherine's point where
Speaker 2: it's like, you guys, I feel like like when you
Speaker 2: hear the word soulmate, like do you think Nick's your soulmate?
Speaker 2: And also like do you have do you then go
Speaker 2: in and out of the seasons too because of like
Speaker 2: the challenges and ups and downs in your marriage?
Speaker 1: That makes sense, Yeah, that's a very interesting question. You know,
Speaker 1: I don't use the word soulmate that often, but I
Speaker 1: definitely he's definitely my person.
Speaker 2: But what's the difference then for you?
Speaker 1: I guess it's the same I don't know. I just
Speaker 1: don't use that term often.
Speaker 3: Is it true?
Speaker 2: Like dramatic a little bit? I mean, so I get it,
Speaker 2: but like.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I mean, but it also is like yes
Speaker 1: we're yes we're soulmates or where are people? But it
Speaker 1: takes a lot of work, and it's been a lot
Speaker 1: and yes, I think there's been seasons of like, yes,
Speaker 1: he feels like my person, Oh my gosh, now we're
Speaker 1: not great. Yes, you know, I think there's been a
Speaker 1: lot of that ups and downs, and I just think
Speaker 1: that that's you have to continue to do work. I
Speaker 1: guess as part of that.
Speaker 2: Well, because you guys didn't because they married young, so
Speaker 2: like they didn't get the chance to do their own
Speaker 2: work before then they got together and then both like
Speaker 2: super healthy. So it's the people that didn't do that work.
Speaker 2: It's like I could see going because I mean, shoot,
Speaker 2: when I was married to my ex, I'm like, I
Speaker 2: don't think you're I don't think he's my person. Yeah
Speaker 2: you know what I mean, Like I'm gonna keep fighting
Speaker 2: for this, but like this isn't how it's supposed to look,
Speaker 2: this is how I'm supposed to feel, Like this is
Speaker 2: my needs aren't getting met. His needs aren't getting met
Speaker 2: like and.
Speaker 1: Maybe I guess that's interesting because then I wasn't so
Speaker 1: sure if he was my person because we got married
Speaker 1: so young, and then we did it's safe, we were
Speaker 1: going to get divorced. And then that's when we were
Speaker 1: doing our work and realizing, wait, we are meant to
Speaker 1: be together. I don't know, it's just interesting, but it
Speaker 1: took that for us to see it, right, you know,
Speaker 1: at least for me to see.
Speaker 2: It almost like sure, you like with your thing, then
Speaker 2: like you guys taking that break, going, oh, we just
Speaker 2: had to do some deep work work.
Speaker 3: Yeah. And I remember talking to you all the way back, Gwen.
Speaker 3: Are we both willing to do the work? You know,
Speaker 3: because it's not that you have to leave each other
Speaker 3: to do work. It happened to be true for us
Speaker 3: in those moments. But I think ideally you come together
Speaker 3: in relationship to work on yourselves together. It's what relationship does.
Speaker 3: I lived in an ashram when I was twenty five,
Speaker 3: and I asked.
Speaker 2: I should know what that is, but is that what
Speaker 2: is that?
Speaker 3: It's like living with a spiritual teacher. It's okay, sterary, okay,
Speaker 3: And I said, I wanted to be come a swammy.
Speaker 3: I'm like twenty eight. I thought that would be the
Speaker 3: path to growth. What's a swaman, they said, Like a
Speaker 3: swammy is like a priest or a nun. Okay, you know.
Speaker 3: And I had grown up in the Catholic Church, and
Speaker 3: I know you're in your faith so beautifully it's whatever
Speaker 3: path works to have you find the answers that you're
Speaker 3: here to answer, you know. And I remember saying them,
Speaker 3: I want to devote myself to the study. And they said,
Speaker 3: this is not the fast path. Meditating in a cave
Speaker 3: and doing what we do is not the fast path.
Speaker 3: You go get married and have children. That's the one
Speaker 3: because it really has us grow so much. It has
Speaker 3: us it's like the final level of growth to be
Speaker 3: in relationship.
Speaker 2: And I'll say this too, to add to that, is
Speaker 2: like there's I'm not saying that you and your guy
Speaker 2: and mean Alan are not going to have like we're
Speaker 2: going to have our issues. Things will come up from
Speaker 2: our past, but it's how we would have handled things
Speaker 2: in the past that would be different how we handle
Speaker 2: them now. Right, So like where I would go like
Speaker 2: to just be like sabotaging, I can now go Okay,
Speaker 2: like let's have the sit down. Let's have it, and
Speaker 2: I might not do it perfectly right the conversation, but
Speaker 2: it's it still looks different, like there's still going to
Speaker 2: be conflict in relationships. It's not to say that like
Speaker 2: just because we've met at the right time, we're going
Speaker 2: to be perfect. Like nothing has come up as of yet,
Speaker 2: like we've been able to really communicate great and have
Speaker 2: great conversations. But years down the line, you know, I'm
Speaker 2: sure things will come up. Like that's just the like
Speaker 2: that's marriage, that's relationships. It's fighting for you know, it's
Speaker 2: being under the same roof.
Speaker 5: It's hard, yeah, and it's good news if that stuff's
Speaker 5: coming up, yeah, because then that means that you're healing
Speaker 5: things and these things are ready to come up, you know,
Speaker 5: if you have the skills to hold it and the awareness,
Speaker 5: which I feel you do.
Speaker 3: Well.
Speaker 2: I just like something that I said to him, because
Speaker 2: you know, he like he's a big fix to process things,
Speaker 2: and I'm like, I don't want to hold in anything back.
Speaker 2: So if you have like resentment and like let's talk
Speaker 2: about this, like what are your feelings? And I think
Speaker 2: you know he comes from more of like you don't
Speaker 2: share feelings, and so it's very new for him to
Speaker 2: like sit down and like have those discussions with me.
Speaker 2: But it's also I'm like, we need to do that,
Speaker 2: you know, because I'm like, I know what resentment does.
Speaker 2: It kills a relationship. So it's like I don't want
Speaker 2: that does. So I'm like, if anything is coming up
Speaker 2: right now, like I saw you get a little frustrated,
Speaker 2: would you like to talk about it because I don't
Speaker 2: want you to hold anything in.
Speaker 1: Yeah, which is so interesting because I used to be
Speaker 1: the person that held it in and now that I'm
Speaker 1: trying to do better, I'm like, well, I'm just feeling well.
Speaker 1: He almost doesn't even know what to do with that, Like,
Speaker 1: are you mad? I'm not mad. I just want to
Speaker 1: talk about it. I just want to get that out there.
Speaker 1: And he's like what, Like, it's just you know, you
Speaker 1: can change and you can get to a point to
Speaker 1: where you do want to talk about your feelings and
Speaker 1: it not be you fight a fight, Yes, which is
Speaker 1: hard sometimes, but yeah, you definitely can get to be.
Speaker 2: So then where do you struggle then?
Speaker 1: Too?
Speaker 2: Shure like on this new path with your your one.
Speaker 3: You know, it's so wild and I mean, we all
Speaker 3: know there's not necessarily a one, you see.
Speaker 2: I disagree. I think he's my one, like and you do.
Speaker 2: I do. I think I think there's the I think
Speaker 2: there's seasons of people, but I don't think those are
Speaker 2: the ones. Like I don't think you get a one
Speaker 2: each season or however many seasons. I think the one stays,
Speaker 2: the one is like the one that you were like
Speaker 2: destined to be with all along.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I feel like there are potential more ones. That's
Speaker 3: my take on it. You know that there's this unbelievable
Speaker 3: limitless ability for us to love and grow. And but
Speaker 3: I love this because I think where I'm with you
Speaker 3: right now, as I feel like mine is so my
Speaker 3: the male version of me. We are so right for
Speaker 3: each other. It's absolutely unarguable. So where though the challenges
Speaker 3: come up are I think it was so amazing to
Speaker 3: me to see my old patterns come up in the
Speaker 3: way that you're talking about too, when we've had trauma
Speaker 3: and we've had relationships in the past that had our
Speaker 3: nervous system be so dysregulated, so up in fight or flight,
Speaker 3: and the triggers that are there, you know, are ours
Speaker 3: to work on. But it's our partner's love and generosity,
Speaker 3: you know, to know about them and to tread lightly
Speaker 3: so that we can heal. And I think it was
Speaker 3: amazing to see how much of the old fears came
Speaker 3: up for a review with him. I remember walking through
Speaker 3: the kitchen one day and just saying, are you okay?
Speaker 3: Like I could sense, you know, I'm so hyper sensitive
Speaker 3: like we are when we've gone through abusive relationships, And
Speaker 3: he just took me in his hands and he said,
Speaker 3: I just need you to know I'm pretty much always okay,
Speaker 3: and if I'm not, I'll tell you. You know, it
Speaker 3: was like this finding new ways to find safety, to
Speaker 3: relax into this kind of a relationship was really work.
Speaker 2: Yeah, what would you say to the girls that like
Speaker 2: are afraid of you know, they've they've gone through the trauma,
Speaker 2: they've had the mistrust, and the ones that are like
Speaker 2: I don't want to I'm afraid to put my heart
Speaker 2: back out there because I don't want to get hurt.
Speaker 2: Like I know my reasons in my you know what
Speaker 2: I would say to that, But I'm just curious, like
Speaker 2: from your more therapeutic side of like what to do
Speaker 2: in that situation where you're like, I don't want to
Speaker 2: get bamboozled again. I I don't want to be embarrassing,
Speaker 2: and I don't want to be fooled again. I've been
Speaker 2: fooled so many times.
Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, it's such a real challenge and I think
Speaker 3: so common. You know that we want to protect our
Speaker 3: heart and build up walls around it, and you can
Speaker 3: see people over lifetimes have just built so many walls.
Speaker 3: And I would always say making a choice from fear
Speaker 3: is never the right choice. We can't make decisions from fear,
Speaker 3: and that is a fear based decision. You know, I'm
Speaker 3: going to avoid and I think there will always be hurt,
Speaker 3: So it's making peace with life is full of that.
Speaker 3: And this was a big lesson for me over the
Speaker 3: years and all my working with people. You know, I've
Speaker 3: never met anybody really amazing who hasn't been through a
Speaker 3: ton of pain. And the lessons and the transformations that
Speaker 3: we go through, what our souls are here to experience,
Speaker 3: really have to come with pain. I think trauma and
Speaker 3: pain are coded into our childhoods for a reason, and
Speaker 3: so to make peace with that means that you will
Speaker 3: be able to know the deepest love. You know you
Speaker 3: and I've talked about the needs before, and these needs
Speaker 3: for certainty and uncertainty. If somebody is really really fighting
Speaker 3: for certainty, they're never going to have the epical, you know,
Speaker 3: because big fat love is messy and it's it's vulnerable,
Speaker 3: and like we're both talking about, you have to bring
Speaker 3: your heart out, talk about it, talk about the things
Speaker 3: that you're holding in there, and that's that's hard. If
Speaker 3: you're really wired for safety and certainty in ways that
Speaker 3: would have you never really know the depth about love.
Speaker 3: So I think it's just being clear about the decision
Speaker 3: you're making. If you don't want to ever get hurt again,
Speaker 3: you put a lid on that, then you put a
Speaker 3: lid on love too.
Speaker 2: That just seems so sad to me too, Like I
Speaker 2: don't I don't want to be the girl that's like, okay,
Speaker 2: just because I've failed, but I've also like I've tried
Speaker 2: and I've loved and it's like I didn't want certain
Speaker 2: things to end and like you, but it's like I
Speaker 2: would hate to be like, all right, well I don't
Speaker 2: want to try again.
Speaker 1: Like that just is like, well, it's interesting. I was
Speaker 1: just thinking about the beginning of this relationship. I can
Speaker 1: remember having a conversation with you because it was like,
Speaker 1: I want to not put boundaries up essentially and not
Speaker 1: be afraid not but like you were struggling with it
Speaker 1: at first because you were scared. Yeah, but you don't
Speaker 1: put those walls up where that's very different from people.
Speaker 1: You think about it and you you struggle with it,
Speaker 1: but then it's like, you know what, I'm just going
Speaker 1: to dive in and if I get hurt, I get hurt,
Speaker 1: you know, and a lot of people I wouldn't be
Speaker 1: able to do that. I mean, I'm queen of walls.
Speaker 1: But like that's why I think this relationship could work
Speaker 1: so well for you, because you were like, I'm scared,
Speaker 1: but I'm just going to jump in.
Speaker 2: Because I could have missed out on like such a
Speaker 2: great love. Ye if I didn't absolutely go for it
Speaker 2: and really try and like bring my best version to myself.
Speaker 2: If he doesn't want to show up the best version,
Speaker 2: well that's on him. I'm going to show up the
Speaker 2: best version that I can be. And you know it's
Speaker 2: still not anymore. But like it was scary, you know, going, Well,
Speaker 2: I hope I hope he's who he says he was,
Speaker 2: because I've you know, I've just been before like not
Speaker 2: the truth, but I gotta I gotta just I gotta
Speaker 2: believe in my gut that I know a little better
Speaker 2: this time. And if not, well.
Speaker 3: Yeah, oh and if the end is yeah, if the
Speaker 3: end game is to know great of if that's what
Speaker 3: you ultimately want and there's fear in the way, then
Speaker 3: that's where we get help. You know why I had
Speaker 3: to take that time to do em d rart work,
Speaker 3: you know, or healing or we have these talks, we
Speaker 3: have each other to sort through those fears. I'm just
Speaker 3: I'm not a fan of letting things stand in the
Speaker 3: way of me and what I want.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's a I know. I don't want to quote
Speaker 2: her because I I don't I don't want the headline
Speaker 2: of it. But she's a reality star and she basically
Speaker 2: was like I paraphrasing, like I've been hurt so many times,
Speaker 2: I will never love someone again. And I was like
Speaker 2: that's sad because I'm like they shouldn't get the last
Speaker 2: Like you deserve to be loved, you deserve to try,
Speaker 2: and like, yeah, it might not work out, but like
Speaker 2: I promise you once you get healthier, like you're going
Speaker 2: to pick healthier if not, like, well you know, at
Speaker 2: least you know and move on and think I just
Speaker 2: feel like it's that.
Speaker 3: Don't you think it's why we're here though, I mean
Speaker 3: to love. It's one of the main purposes I think
Speaker 3: of being a human being.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And it's not like you don't have to like
Speaker 2: and I'm not saying like being a relationship is like whatever,
Speaker 2: like I found happiness with that blah, Like yes, one,
Speaker 2: And I still think you shouldn't hold yourself back from
Speaker 2: trying in a relationship just because you've been hurt. I get
Speaker 2: being scared. I totally understand, Like I get it, And yeah,
Speaker 2: you shouldn't like you shouldn't like it's just you know,
Speaker 2: like you said, we're here to love and we deserve
Speaker 2: to be love and to love.
Speaker 3: Yes. In the Book of Joy that Dalai Lama wrote
Speaker 3: about and Desmond Tutu is incredible book about how many
Speaker 3: horrors they've been through, I mean just horrors.
Speaker 2: I'm a horse.
Speaker 4: What oh okay those two or is it just me?
Speaker 2: Did you hear that too? Yeah? You never know what the.
Speaker 3: Horrors of being exiled from your country or being held
Speaker 3: in jailed, or being threatened to die. You know, all
Speaker 3: those things are actually what taught them joy, that those
Speaker 3: were the doorways to knowing great love and joy. So
Speaker 3: I think that's just what gets misunderstood, you know in
Speaker 3: this crazy ride that we're on.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know, and I I you find out more too,
Speaker 2: like from those relationships, like the worst some of the
Speaker 2: worst relationships that I've been in, the lessons that I'm like,
Speaker 2: oh man, like really they become such teaching moments too,
Speaker 2: to like what you don't want. So I'm almost sometimes
Speaker 2: grateful for them.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, and not even just in love and
Speaker 1: everything in life. I mean, like you make mistakes, that's
Speaker 1: how you learn from them. It's just like kids, you know,
Speaker 1: growing up. They make a mistake, they're going to learn
Speaker 1: from that, They're not going to do it next time.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's just like how we're wired.
Speaker 2: Yeah, how is your it's even with things like does
Speaker 2: your ex husband like the guy?
Speaker 3: Yeah, completely great. You know, we're we're still great friends
Speaker 3: and he's actually finally in a relationship too. So it's
Speaker 3: such an amazing thing, you know, just to see how
Speaker 3: far we've come.
Speaker 2: Isn't that so great?
Speaker 3: Oh? God? You know that's what I'd love for people
Speaker 3: to know is if you are listening and you're in
Speaker 3: that place where it just feels like there's no way out,
Speaker 3: you know, where you and I both have been through
Speaker 3: so much. You know, there is I think something to
Speaker 3: this world that is kind of a natural and perfect
Speaker 3: order towards goodness, towards growth, you know, and if you
Speaker 3: just keeps showing up. I mean, we just kept having
Speaker 3: all the talks, and we just keep showing up for
Speaker 3: the kids and knowing that we're in this to you know,
Speaker 3: be a modern family, like I alway said I didn't
Speaker 3: want to have the broken family, like a really cool
Speaker 3: modern family. Then that's that guiding light that ultimately brought
Speaker 3: us here. And it's not without its ups and downs,
Speaker 3: you know, at all. Like kids go through their different
Speaker 3: phases and it pulls on us as parents in all
Speaker 3: kinds of different ways. And I'm moving in now, so
Speaker 3: we're changing like the whole structure of.
Speaker 2: The wait, moving in the house, moving in with.
Speaker 3: Your with my man and does he have to Yeah,
Speaker 3: but we're older kids, you know. His are twenty seven,
Speaker 3: twenty nine and mine are eighteen and twenty. So it's
Speaker 3: a a whole different phase.
Speaker 1: Sure.
Speaker 3: Yeah. How are your kids doing with all of it?
Speaker 2: Oh, it's great, Like they're everything's great, Like they love Alan,
Speaker 2: Alan and Max. I mean Alan and Alan and uh
Speaker 2: Alan and yeah, Alan and MYX have a great relationship.
Speaker 2: I mean, you know, everything is good, you know. I mean,
Speaker 2: and we have been able to Max and I've been
Speaker 2: able to have when stuff does come up, we're like, hey,
Speaker 2: can we kind of talk this out? And you know,
Speaker 2: we still have our moments where you know, we get frustrated,
Speaker 2: and but we're able to communicate in such a better
Speaker 2: way now. So that's been nice. And it's just we've
Speaker 2: had more respect out of our marriage than in our marriage.
Speaker 3: That's a good hallmark that says you are you made
Speaker 3: the right choice. Yeah, we're better as co parents, better
Speaker 3: as friends than married. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I have a book coming out and I
Speaker 2: talk about that just kind of like that, never thinking
Speaker 2: we'd ever get to that other side of like and
Speaker 2: there's still going to be things that obviously come up.
Speaker 2: There's deep resentments and stuff like that, but then also
Speaker 2: it's like how to how I let go of a
Speaker 2: lot of those things and like, you know, can just
Speaker 2: kind of look at them as you know, the father
Speaker 2: of my kids and not hold that stuff because I'm like,
Speaker 2: I don't want to be walking around with I feel
Speaker 2: like this year just shifted me and like I don't
Speaker 2: want I don't want any bad energy. I just don't
Speaker 2: want it. I don't want I don't want it. I
Speaker 2: don't want hatred, I don't want like heaviness, just too
Speaker 2: like too short. We talk about this all time, like
Speaker 2: it's I feel like a broken record saying it, but
Speaker 2: it is. Life is just too damn short to like
Speaker 2: hold onto any negative energy or put it out there.
Speaker 2: I don't like it, That's what I'm like. I mean,
Speaker 2: I even rewent through my book being like I don't
Speaker 2: need to put that in there anymore. I don't need
Speaker 2: like you know, it's not necessary. I don't need to
Speaker 2: write about that, you know, about my exer about you know,
Speaker 2: don't need it. So it's like I don't want, I
Speaker 2: don't want, I don't want any.
Speaker 3: I remember telling you years ago that all it takes
Speaker 3: is one person to choose the highest choose take the
Speaker 3: higher road, however you want to say it, but it
Speaker 3: takes one person to shift a relationship, and you did
Speaker 3: that right now too, just holding out to stay in
Speaker 3: that higher vibration.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because we could do the meeting, like I know,
Speaker 2: friends that are divorced that meet at you know, a
Speaker 2: certain drop off at And we got there at one
Speaker 2: point almost where it was like Katherine was like, you know,
Speaker 2: you got to set a better boundary because it was ugly,
Speaker 2: you know, and then like all right, fine, we're mean
Speaker 2: net whole foods at this time, you know, like it
Speaker 2: was about to get there, and then it was like,
Speaker 2: you know, as time. But then it's like read about
Speaker 2: it in the next chapter.
Speaker 1: Good place.
Speaker 3: I so excited for this.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I mean it's just like it it's you know,
Speaker 2: but sometimes and there's still people like we've been able
Speaker 2: to at least kind of hang our hats going, like
Speaker 2: we've done a decent job of like even though there
Speaker 2: was hurt, that we can co parent. And I think
Speaker 2: at the end of the day, it's like kids are
Speaker 2: number at the top, you know. Yeah, so if it's
Speaker 2: going to make my kid happy to have his dad
Speaker 2: here for his birthday party, I'm gonna invite him over,
Speaker 2: you know, put my stuff aside. But yeah, so it's good,
Speaker 2: we're good, We're fine. I mean, he's yeah, I I uh, yeah,
Speaker 2: I fived him today when he took up when he
Speaker 2: dropped off Jolie from the Dennis later as I kissed
Speaker 2: my fiance, like it's good.
Speaker 3: Did it bring up anything for him that you're getting married?
Speaker 3: You know what?
Speaker 2: I said this on the last show when when he
Speaker 2: found out, well, when we told him whatever Jolie I did,
Speaker 2: he was like, after everything, I've after everything I did.
Speaker 2: You deserve like such happiness in love and and you know,
Speaker 2: of all people, you deserve it. And so yeah, it
Speaker 2: was great, amazing, Yeah, healing is that it was beautiful. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it was really really really nice, like his acknowledgment and
Speaker 2: then his like, well wished is like that seemed so genuine.
Speaker 2: So I was like that was cool.
Speaker 3: Yeah, oh you're showing up everybody. What's possible? Lady?
Speaker 2: Well, hey, who knows like in about you know what
Speaker 2: I mean? But yeah, yeah, but I mean like you
Speaker 2: never you know, it's like as long as but you
Speaker 2: just keep every day, You're like, let's just be you know,
Speaker 2: be positive, be be good, happy.
Speaker 1: Literally it's stay by day.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, because I mean anything can set up.
Speaker 3: You know, did you and Alan put together a vision
Speaker 3: for what it is that you're creating, do you do?
Speaker 3: You both have kind of a shared vision for what
Speaker 3: the marriage is going to be, the life that you're creating.
Speaker 2: So no, we haven't like really sat down. But for us,
Speaker 2: it's like just love and respect. Love, respect and trust
Speaker 2: are like the the main three things. It's like respect
Speaker 2: is like our number one thing, and like we respect
Speaker 2: each other so much. And from that respect, like I
Speaker 2: trust him, and the love is is we know how
Speaker 2: special it is, and so we're also like we don't.
Speaker 2: I don't ever want to be in a moment where
Speaker 2: I'm like, I don't trust him, but I don't. I
Speaker 2: don't even I don't fear that one one ounce of
Speaker 2: my body fears that, Like how he loves and respects me,
Speaker 2: I trust him.
Speaker 3: So everything stems from there.
Speaker 2: So I think that's just like the the love and
Speaker 2: respect is at the top, which is also a very
Speaker 2: good book too. Yeah, they say men want respect, women
Speaker 2: want love. Yeah, it's yeah.
Speaker 3: So I remember I did a workshop once with David Data,
Speaker 3: and he teaches sacred relationship and the practice of intimacy,
Speaker 3: and he's an incredible teacher, and he had us do
Speaker 3: this practice where you choose a partner a woman and
Speaker 3: a man sitting in front of each other and say,
Speaker 3: looking into the other person's eyes, over and over and
Speaker 3: over again, the two things that men and women want
Speaker 3: to hear the most, and that's masculine identified feminine identified.
Speaker 3: It's not a gender thing, but to say over and
Speaker 3: over and over again to a man, I trust you,
Speaker 3: I respect you, I trust you, I respect you, I
Speaker 3: trust you, I respect you. I watched this man in
Speaker 3: front of me collapse into tears. It was so profound.
Speaker 3: And the reverse was you're beautiful. I love you. You're beautiful,
Speaker 3: I love you, And I mean, well, it is true.
Speaker 3: Those are the things that are, at the end of
Speaker 3: the day, so vital to keeping us feeling alive and appreciated.
Speaker 2: You know what is nikto for you that you like feel.
Speaker 1: Oh gosh, I mean I've never questioned for a second
Speaker 1: that he loves me ever, Yeah, honestly, but I think
Speaker 1: the thing that I have. It's funny what was coming
Speaker 1: up for me when she was saying that, I was like, man,
Speaker 1: I bet sometimes I don't come off like I respect him,
Speaker 1: not a lot, but like sometimes you know, like not
Speaker 1: the trust thing we have, trust, like he knows I
Speaker 1: trust him and place, you know, no issues there, But
Speaker 1: I think the respect thing is the harder thing for us.
Speaker 2: Interesting, I could.
Speaker 1: See, like the way I say some things, or the
Speaker 1: way I you know it, control the kids or you know,
Speaker 1: like things like that, I could see where as a
Speaker 1: man could see that as not respecting, like their ability
Speaker 1: to parent, or their ability to make a decision or
Speaker 1: you know whatever. I don't mean it in that way,
Speaker 1: but I can see where that would come off.
Speaker 2: Do you think it's because of like the direct way
Speaker 2: that you're saying it, or I think.
Speaker 1: The way I say things sometimes, which I've gotten a
Speaker 1: lot better at, but also just like the controlling factor,
Speaker 1: like in the like family, like we're going to do
Speaker 1: this and he's like, you know, he's starting to kind
Speaker 1: of I mean after what fourteen years, but like hey,
Speaker 1: like you know, let me make this decision, let me
Speaker 1: do this, and like, you know, I don't know, it's
Speaker 1: just it's interesting. But I mean he's I mean, he
Speaker 1: always shows me that he loves me and thinks I'm beautiful.
Speaker 1: I've never questioned that tree.
Speaker 2: What do you think to that?
Speaker 3: I think this is where it gets interesting. Why I
Speaker 3: asked you about your vision and for the relationship, because
Speaker 3: when you have those shared values, then it's how do
Speaker 3: you get down into the to the cope you know,
Speaker 3: to the co parenting, to the doing of the things
Speaker 3: you know with those values in mind that it gets
Speaker 3: down into how you do your life, you know. And
Speaker 3: I think I think it's it's tricky because I always say,
Speaker 3: the more you want to give, the more you need.
Speaker 3: And so if you want to give a lot of
Speaker 3: trust and respect, then you have to talk about what
Speaker 3: you need. What's the exchange? You know, what fills you up?
Speaker 3: What has you be in your most true self, you know,
Speaker 3: your most resourced self to be able to give those
Speaker 3: things to him? You know what? What what has you
Speaker 3: respect him?
Speaker 1: Well?
Speaker 2: End the question? Then do you do you respect him? Oh?
Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely, yeah, absolutely I can. I just know my
Speaker 1: personality and at times I can look back and be
Speaker 1: like I could see where that didn't sound like I
Speaker 1: respect him. Does that make sense?
Speaker 2: Do you go then and tell him that I do?
Speaker 1: Now? I am better at that time now I was
Speaker 1: not before. And I think that was a lot of
Speaker 1: our problem. And it's just interesting because I really hadn't
Speaker 1: truly thought about it that much as like a respect
Speaker 1: thing like even like like just even just random things
Speaker 1: like with business stuff, like he may mention something. I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: you maybe you should have done this, or you should
Speaker 1: have done that, or you should and I can see
Speaker 1: that triggers him. And I think that comes from like, Okay,
Speaker 1: you're not like respecting my job and what I'm doing,
Speaker 1: and you know, and so I've noticed that creep back
Speaker 1: in a little bit and then I try to like
Speaker 1: stop myself, like no, no, but that was a great,
Speaker 1: great job or you know whatever, just trying to like
Speaker 1: not criticize it.
Speaker 3: But you know, and that I know, and we can
Speaker 3: criticize because you know, when we get criticized, weaks changed.
Speaker 3: But when you criticize a guy, he just wants to
Speaker 3: go away, right, you know, it creates distance. It's very
Speaker 3: different the way criticism lands on us. Yeah, and what
Speaker 3: it does. So but in those moments where you catch yourself,
Speaker 3: this is where I think it's so great because there's
Speaker 3: also a good reason that you are saying that. There's
Speaker 3: a reason that you feel like you want to say
Speaker 3: a thing like the need for control you said, or
Speaker 3: there's maybe fear popping up, or you want to contribute
Speaker 3: and you want to help, but it's not what he needs.
Speaker 3: And so to check in and say, oh man, what's
Speaker 3: just going on for me there? Or what I'm feeling
Speaker 3: right now is stress and it's like a way that
Speaker 3: I'm dealing with the stress to try to manage you
Speaker 3: like you're one of my kids.
Speaker 1: So true. So sorry, literally nailed all of it right there. Yep, sorry,
Speaker 1: you're not one of my children.
Speaker 2: I know, I know, I know, but I think just
Speaker 2: like I'm being not humble in the moment, but like
Speaker 2: you are humbling them and be like I'm sorry you're
Speaker 2: not Like it's like because then he's like, oh, that's
Speaker 2: where you just stepped in. You're just in that role,
Speaker 2: and so then you just categorize them in that area.
Speaker 2: And it's like if you say in that moment too,
Speaker 2: I think that'd be like so helpful.
Speaker 1: Yeah for sure.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Interesting, Can I offer one little tidbit?
Speaker 1: Sure?
Speaker 2: So I was talking to Nick.
Speaker 1: No no no no no no no.
Speaker 2: I like Nick is a close friend, Like I like
Speaker 2: Nick and I have a great.
Speaker 1: Actually he said, no, no.
Speaker 2: No, no, no no no. I just think this is
Speaker 2: like such a good like such a good thing to
Speaker 2: add going into what you guys are about to do Okay,
Speaker 2: So I we were talking about he was leaving right,
Speaker 2: so he was like cat on vacation. I was like, Oh,
Speaker 2: she's the best. And he's just like, no, she has
Speaker 2: to have she has to do something.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I like to be busy.
Speaker 2: You like to be busy and have an activity every
Speaker 2: single day. I go, Cat, I was like, no way,
Speaker 2: she's like He's like, oh no, She's different when it
Speaker 2: comes to like the kid vacation. I was like really.
Speaker 2: I was like, man, she's like awesome to like vacation
Speaker 2: with him, like play cards and we chill, like because
Speaker 2: I don't have kids her. But he's like, no, she's
Speaker 2: like she always has to have like a plan or
Speaker 2: like an adventure thing to do. So I'd be curious
Speaker 2: what it would be like to try this on and
Speaker 2: so maybe one of the days go hey, Nick, what
Speaker 2: would you like to do today? And or like and
Speaker 2: don't plan anything and just and if it's just they
Speaker 2: just want to whatever and just for one day out
Speaker 2: of the seven days, just don't have a plan and
Speaker 2: just relax.
Speaker 1: Okay. I mean I don't have a plan every day, but.
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying. As right, or no, is
Speaker 2: this terrible? Is this terrible advisue? It's great, It's great,
Speaker 2: just like you like almost can surprise him in a way.
Speaker 1: He's gonna know.
Speaker 4: No, I don't think you will after vacation when he
Speaker 4: listens to the podcast, but whatever, you can try it
Speaker 4: on and be like I tried it.
Speaker 3: It would be such a gift to him. Yeah, it would,
Speaker 3: because you know, to give him his version of the
Speaker 3: vacation for a day is just yeah, what a gift.
Speaker 3: But you know what beyond what a gift it is
Speaker 3: to him, I kind of want to know what that
Speaker 3: would give you, to be able to just relax.
Speaker 2: Can I answer for because I'm almost thinking she's just
Speaker 2: gonna say stress. Yeah, I don't think you can do it.
Speaker 2: I don't and I don't mean it out of like
Speaker 2: not love, but I'm just like, I think it's gonna
Speaker 2: stress you out more, just not have something to do
Speaker 2: for each of the children.
Speaker 1: If it's just me, I am like the queen of relaxing,
Speaker 1: Like I could binge, watch Netflix and like have no issues.
Speaker 1: But when you get the kids involved and it's mom
Speaker 1: mom mo mo mo, mom mom, I find it just
Speaker 1: much easier to have activities. That's all it really is.
Speaker 1: I can chill now. I don't love just like sunbathing
Speaker 1: all day long if you haven't picked up on that
Speaker 1: by on the beach, because I cannot just sit there
Speaker 1: and lay there in the sun all day long.
Speaker 2: Right, But maybe that's just what they wanted to do
Speaker 2: and go down those fun little slides.
Speaker 1: Oh we'reon'll be going down the fun little.
Speaker 2: You know what I mean? For like in not doing
Speaker 2: something that day and just letting Nick take it over
Speaker 2: because it can be you don't need to carry every
Speaker 2: day of planning. Moms take it on as their thing. True,
Speaker 2: let him have a day and he again then in
Speaker 2: a way thinks he's like cool, you.
Speaker 3: Know what I mean?
Speaker 1: All Right, fine, I'll give him one day to plan.
Speaker 1: I will report back and let.
Speaker 3: Y'all know how.
Speaker 2: She will report that.
Speaker 3: Let's refine it, though, because I think there's this thing
Speaker 3: called making a deal that I love where it's not
Speaker 3: a compromise and it's not like, oh, you're now going
Speaker 3: to have to be stressed all day and it's going
Speaker 3: to be really hard in taxing on you because then
Speaker 3: there'll be fallout from there. Right that it's okay in
Speaker 3: order to give you that this is what I need.
Speaker 3: You know, it's a little bit of like back and
Speaker 3: forth until you know, you get spaw time to you know,
Speaker 3: decompress from it, or there's somebody else, you know, the
Speaker 3: kid daycare, you know at this hotel that takes over.
Speaker 3: But there's got to be a way that you make
Speaker 3: this that really serves you both.
Speaker 1: Yeah, she's speaking my language. Okay, I can do this. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm not saying the game.
Speaker 2: This is what I heard. This is not what I said.
Speaker 2: I want you to recovery.
Speaker 1: There's no plan for today except for you get.
Speaker 3: The kids all day.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that was not what I was going for. Oh sure,
Speaker 2: where can our listeners again find you and everything that
Speaker 2: you're doing.
Speaker 3: Oh, they can find me at the sirencall dot com
Speaker 3: or Shari Heally And yeah, there's a whole lot of good, new,
Speaker 3: amazing things coming out of my work. Like what my
Speaker 3: calling is to help you? My calling is to help
Speaker 3: you answer yours. So it's really after all these years,
Speaker 3: sixteen years of coaching and working with people in branding
Speaker 3: and leaders and companies to help them find their purpose,
Speaker 3: it's all come down to Siren and that's the new
Speaker 3: the new brand to really help people find their purpose
Speaker 3: and live it.
Speaker 2: I love that. All right, well, we'll get you back on,
Speaker 2: we'll have the fiance on, and then we can make
Speaker 2: a plan for our our thing.
Speaker 3: I love I would love it. I'd love to meet him.
Speaker 3: Congratulations and thank you you too.
Speaker 2: I'm so excited for you too. Good luck with the moss.
Speaker 3: Thank you.
Speaker 2: Okay, bye bye girl. That was funny. I love her,
Speaker 2: She's so sweet. I want her to do and I
Speaker 2: don't have to look now, but I need her to
Speaker 2: do like some kind of meditation things. I'm real big
Speaker 2: into meditating now. Meditating meditation, Yeah, like Alan will always
Speaker 2: be Katie wanted to like a ten minute meditation? And
Speaker 2: or does this start since I met Alan? Because he
Speaker 2: does like these little like ten minute meditations. They're so relaxing.
Speaker 1: I know we've had this conversation before, but do you
Speaker 1: truly think of nothing in those ten minutes?
Speaker 2: No? Okay, I will be like, oh I got to
Speaker 2: do but then I'm like, oh, go back. So it's
Speaker 2: just like training your brain. Now, I don't think as
Speaker 2: I don't think of as many things. And then there's
Speaker 2: one that's really good. We actually fell asleep to it
Speaker 2: last night. It's like a go to sleep meditation. It's
Speaker 2: so nice because my brain, you know, her brains are
Speaker 2: still like going and stuff. So yeah, it's great. But
Speaker 2: I feel like she's got such a good voice for
Speaker 2: like meditation, so calming.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I want to do that on here one day
Speaker 1: if I can do it.
Speaker 2: The meditation. Yeah, it's really great. I get seriously, I
Speaker 2: never thought I could do it, but because I thought,
Speaker 2: I was like, well, mom, I'm always thinking of something. Yeah, yes,
Speaker 2: and you go right.
Speaker 1: Back right sure makes sense.
Speaker 2: Well, I'm very excited for your vacation.
Speaker 1: Thank you.
Speaker 2: You want to come back on Thursday for some more
Speaker 2: breaking news, I would love to stay tuned.