Speaker 1: Hello, everyone, my beautiful people. Welcome to this week's episode
Speaker 1: of Cheeky's and Chill. I hope that you guys are
Speaker 1: having an amazing week, a productive week, a safe week.
Speaker 1: I want to talk today about something that came up
Speaker 1: in one of my workouts. I was on the treadmill
Speaker 1: and I was thinking about confidence, and I was actually
Speaker 1: on Instagram and I was noticing a few things, and
Speaker 1: so I thought, I'm going to talk about this on
Speaker 1: the podcast. So today we're going to talk about confidence
Speaker 1: and godfidence, Okay, And I'm going to tell you guys
Speaker 1: what I think they both are and my definition of confidence.
Speaker 1: So I'm going to make this short and sweet because
Speaker 1: I feel that that's what just you know, you know,
Speaker 1: I don't want to make it too long. I don't
Speaker 1: want to over explain. But basically, I heard this word
Speaker 1: godfidence years ago. I would listen to a lady called
Speaker 1: Joyce Meyer, and she is a preacher and I love
Speaker 1: her books, and I would listen to she had like
Speaker 1: an app and she used the word godfidence, and I
Speaker 1: wanted to share it with you guys because I feel
Speaker 1: now more than ever, a lot of people feel that
Speaker 1: confidence is more to do with our outer abilities versus
Speaker 1: our inner abilities. And for me, that's what godfidence is. Okay, Again,
Speaker 1: it's not about me trying to preach to you or
Speaker 1: shove religion down your throat, because that's not what it is.
Speaker 1: You guys know that I'm a spiritual person. So whether
Speaker 1: you want to call the higher power God, or you
Speaker 1: want to call it the universe, or whatever it is
Speaker 1: that you believe in, I truly believe that there is
Speaker 1: a higher power, something a lot stronger, a lot more
Speaker 1: powerful than myself, which is what I submit to every day,
Speaker 1: and which is why I get on my knees and
Speaker 1: I just kind of humble myself before this higher power.
Speaker 1: You can call it whatever you want. I like to
Speaker 1: call it God. So that's why I say godfidence because
Speaker 1: godfidence is more to do with our inner abilities versus
Speaker 1: our outer abilities. Okay. Now, on social media, I see
Speaker 1: a lot people that feel confident with their bodies, maybe
Speaker 1: with saying I'm confident because I can wear this, or
Speaker 1: I have this nice booty in this small little waist
Speaker 1: and these big muscles, or I have this amazing car,
Speaker 1: this Lamborghini or this burken bag or all of these
Speaker 1: materialistic abilities or things that you have accomplished, and that's
Speaker 1: what gives certain people the confidence to the outer world.
Speaker 1: But I've learned, and of course I'm not gonna say
Speaker 1: any names, but I've learned that I've seen a lot
Speaker 1: of beautiful and handsome people. But then you sit down
Speaker 1: and you speak to them, and they don't know who
Speaker 1: they are. They have no idea where they're going. They
Speaker 1: are living day by day, which might be great, but
Speaker 1: they have no substance. You speak to them and it's
Speaker 1: like an empty shell of just beauty and muscles. And
Speaker 1: they have these flashy things on and they have this
Speaker 1: very expensive purse, and they drive this amazing car, and
Speaker 1: they have these great positions. But I learn nothing from them.
Speaker 1: And that's okay. But to me, I feel like confidence
Speaker 1: has to do with knowing who you are. And I'm
Speaker 1: telling you, guys, it's because I learned this a while back,
Speaker 1: literally two years ago. This came with a lot of
Speaker 1: time and experiences and a lot of falling on my face.
Speaker 1: For a long time, I thought I was confident. I
Speaker 1: think I was being confident because that's what I thought
Speaker 1: I had to do, you know, and show the world
Speaker 1: that I'm confident in this way, but literally I learned
Speaker 1: what confidence is like two years ago when I lost
Speaker 1: the fear of what people are gonna think of me.
Speaker 1: I've always felt peace with who I am and I
Speaker 1: would go to sleep and you know how they say,
Speaker 1: like you know at night the miss Quilla, you go
Speaker 1: to sleep feeling peaceful. I have felt that, but I
Speaker 1: was like, I learned my purpose, And that's what godfidence
Speaker 1: is about, is really really trusting and knowing your inner abilities,
Speaker 1: your morals, your values, and that gives you this confidence
Speaker 1: of even if they were to take away everything I've
Speaker 1: earned and I've accomplished in the exterior world, I would steal.
Speaker 1: And I'm telling you this with my heart in my hand,
Speaker 1: and I am not saying that this is what I want.
Speaker 1: But I'm so confident and who I am within myself
Speaker 1: and what I think and what I have to bring
Speaker 1: to this world. I know my purpose. Then now I
Speaker 1: walk differently that now, if they were to take away
Speaker 1: my career, or they were to take away my home,
Speaker 1: or I were to just lose everything, I'd say, Okay,
Speaker 1: I have the abilities here and here to rebuild myself.
Speaker 1: If I need to go sell oranges, and I say
Speaker 1: this in my book. You better believe that I will
Speaker 1: sell the best oranges and I will make the best
Speaker 1: orange juice out there, like I will find a way
Speaker 1: to rebuild myself because I have so much faith in
Speaker 1: the higher power and in my innerabilities that that is
Speaker 1: only that is God given that no one can take
Speaker 1: that away from me. That it's giving me this different
Speaker 1: confidence to the exterior world where like Cheek's you are
Speaker 1: glowing differently. I'm like, yeah, because I know myself. Now,
Speaker 1: now I know myself, I might unapologetically I myself. This
Speaker 1: is who I am. I like myself. I really love
Speaker 1: myself more than loving myself. I like who I am.
Speaker 1: I like who I am inside that even if I
Speaker 1: gain weight, because it has nothing to do because people think, oh,
Speaker 1: does it have to do with the media, or like, yes,
Speaker 1: I have a great guy in my life, and yes,
Speaker 1: he helps me feel better because he gives me peace,
Speaker 1: because he reassures me, he values me. That definitely helps.
Speaker 1: But even with that, I had to learn to love
Speaker 1: myself in order for him to see that in value
Speaker 1: that in me, and that took a long time. That
Speaker 1: took time and experiences and a lot of kissing frogs
Speaker 1: to get to my prints. So yes, it has to
Speaker 1: do with that. And yes it has to do with
Speaker 1: the fact that I've lost weight because that makes me
Speaker 1: feel better. That makes you feel better, absolutely, But I
Speaker 1: know myself. In order to find your way in this world,
Speaker 1: you need to learn your who, Who are you? What's
Speaker 1: your purpose? It doesn't have to be my purpose. I
Speaker 1: feel like my purpose is thank goodness, I have this platform.
Speaker 1: I'm able to share my experiences and be completely honest
Speaker 1: and hopefully change lives through my books, through my music,
Speaker 1: through my podcast. But it doesn't even have to be
Speaker 1: on that scale. It could be in your workplace, whatever
Speaker 1: it may be. It's what is your purpose? Why are
Speaker 1: you here? What difference do you want to make in
Speaker 1: the world. Another part of finding your godfidence, your true
Speaker 1: inner confidence, you guys, is service. Being of service. That's
Speaker 1: part of having purpose in life is being of service
Speaker 1: to others. Yes, loving self care, self love, we're all
Speaker 1: about that on this podcast. But it's also that's for
Speaker 1: you to be aligned, for you to feel good in
Speaker 1: order to give your best right, but being of service
Speaker 1: to someone gives you this different feeling of Also, it's
Speaker 1: part of your purpose. It's part of feeling confident. So
Speaker 1: that's why I wanted to talk about that because I
Speaker 1: feel like it's getting lost and it worries me for
Speaker 1: future generations to come. It's the substance is being lost
Speaker 1: on social media. People don't want to read anymore. Like
Speaker 1: people want instant gratification. There's no like looking at longevity.
Speaker 1: Everyone wants everything quick. The attention span is getting shorter
Speaker 1: and shorter and shorter. And I see it, I see it,
Speaker 1: I experience it, and everyone is just fluffed. And I
Speaker 1: felt the need to talk about this once again. I
Speaker 1: was on the treadmill and I was thinking, and I
Speaker 1: read and I listen to books, and I was just like, dude,
Speaker 1: this is something that I got to talk about. Like
Speaker 1: so many people are lost in just the fluff and
Speaker 1: the plush of life. And granted, I like pretty things.
Speaker 1: I like things that bling. Everything right now is they
Speaker 1: amanthas and blinging, But there's so much more to that
Speaker 1: than just what the eye, what the eye sees, or
Speaker 1: what the eye means. It's it's like I don't want
Speaker 1: the substance to be lost, Like because once that beautiful
Speaker 1: body's gone and those big muscles and what if God
Speaker 1: forbid you lose your car or something like. You can't
Speaker 1: let those things define you because those things can be
Speaker 1: taking away from you. It's really working on your inner
Speaker 1: self that is going to take you further. And that's
Speaker 1: one thing that I talk about with Emilia all the time.
Speaker 1: I'm like, Okay, are you gonna love me even though
Speaker 1: if I if I gain weight or I start getting wrinkles,
Speaker 1: and you know, like, because I'm seven years older than him,
Speaker 1: so we have these conversations, I still feel vulnerable. I
Speaker 1: still feel insecure sometimes, and he said yes, because I'm
Speaker 1: in love with the human being that you are, with
Speaker 1: your soul. And that's what I want to always cater to,
Speaker 1: is my soul and working on that and learning to
Speaker 1: be the best version of myself. And I have ugly
Speaker 1: days too, you guys, I have days where I'm not
Speaker 1: the best version of myself. But at least now I
Speaker 1: have the balls and the confidence and I'm unapologetically myself
Speaker 1: to say, you know what, I'm sorry. I was messed
Speaker 1: up and I hurt your feelings and I apologize. That's
Speaker 1: all part of maturing and really loving who you are,
Speaker 1: flaws and all. And that made me feel good when
Speaker 1: he told me that. And of course, I mean, I'm
Speaker 1: sure he's not gonna be like, oh yeah, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: let you go and you like gain fifty pounds. You know.
Speaker 1: I don't know, but I'm like, well, at least he knows,
Speaker 1: he sees me for me, he sees beyond everything else,
Speaker 1: because we don't know what's going to happen tomorrow, you guys,
Speaker 1: we don't know. Literally, the whole pandemic came and I
Speaker 1: think a lot of people forgot about that. The pandemic
Speaker 1: came and scared the shit out of all of us,
Speaker 1: and we were like, what's going to happen? And everyone
Speaker 1: was stuck at home, and like life has definitely changed
Speaker 1: since then. But I feel like I don't I don't know,
Speaker 1: Like I don't want people to lose the meaning of life,
Speaker 1: like just to live, live to live and live to
Speaker 1: get things and buy things and show off, just to
Speaker 1: show off. And it's like who are you, Like what
Speaker 1: are you bringing to the world, Like what how are
Speaker 1: you of being of service to the world, helping the
Speaker 1: better good, you know, like the bigger picture. And I'm
Speaker 1: honestly concerned, And I talk I was talking to my
Speaker 1: sister about it too, and I'm like, you know, and
Speaker 1: we have to like do our best to raise my
Speaker 1: nieces and nephews in the best way possible and talk
Speaker 1: to them about these things so that they don't get
Speaker 1: lost in that, because that's all we see now, that's
Speaker 1: what show. That is what's shoved down our throat every
Speaker 1: single day. And it's not to say that you can't
Speaker 1: be an amazing human being and helping the world and
Speaker 1: have nice things. Absolutely, that's awesome. That's amazing. I'm not
Speaker 1: saying you can't do that. But I have encountered a
Speaker 1: lot of like where you think, oh, this this person
Speaker 1: is so freaking beautiful on the exterior, but then you
Speaker 1: sit down and you speak to them and there's nothing there,
Speaker 1: and I'm just like, so it's just kind of like
Speaker 1: a fake confidence. Like they just feel confident because they
Speaker 1: look good because they have nice things. But do they
Speaker 1: go to sleep and think, am I a good person?
Speaker 1: Did I do something good for someone else today? And
Speaker 1: that's where gonfidence comes in. You guys are inner abilities
Speaker 1: who we are within what is going to last forever
Speaker 1: our spirit, our soul, And that's what it is, and
Speaker 1: that's what I feel, in my opinion, is real confidence
Speaker 1: is I can honestly go anywhere and look like crap
Speaker 1: on the exterior, and I will walk somewhere with my
Speaker 1: head held tied because I know who I am here.
Speaker 1: And of course I still have insecurities. Of course, I,
Speaker 1: like I said, have bad days. But at the end
Speaker 1: of the day, I'm not out here trying to hurt anybody,
Speaker 1: trying to up anyone, being an opportunist, an opportunist and
Speaker 1: stepping on anyone, trying to hurt anybody, and you know,
Speaker 1: to get to where I want to get to know
Speaker 1: because at the end of the day, yeah, maybe I'll
Speaker 1: step on this person and get to where I want
Speaker 1: to get to, But then how long is that going
Speaker 1: to last me. I'd rather take longer to get to
Speaker 1: my destination and obtain that one thing I want and
Speaker 1: know that it took me longer because I didn't hurt anyone.
Speaker 1: I didn't try to step on anyone, I didn't try
Speaker 1: to screw anyone over. And that's what gives me peace
Speaker 1: at the end of the day, to say, Okay, I
Speaker 1: did good today, did I do something good today? When
Speaker 1: I go to sleep, I literally I'm like thank you God,
Speaker 1: did I do something good today? Day I do something
Speaker 1: for someone else, and if I didn't, if I had
Speaker 1: a bad day, then I'm like, God, I'm so sorry,
Speaker 1: Higher power, whatever God for me, it's God. Okay, it's
Speaker 1: not even a anyways. Well get that's a whole other
Speaker 1: episode what I think God is. But I'm like, Okay,
Speaker 1: today it wasn't my best day and I'm so sorry
Speaker 1: I snapped at this person today. I'm gonna apologize tomorrow
Speaker 1: or you know what, I'm gonna get on my phone
Speaker 1: and I will. I'll be like, you know what, I
Speaker 1: recognize that I was at my best self yesterday and
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. We're human at the end of the day,
Speaker 1: you know. But I feel peace in my life heart
Speaker 1: to know I live with good intentions and I walk
Speaker 1: around with confidence with my head held high in that way,
Speaker 1: and I shine and I let my little light shine
Speaker 1: bright because I know that I am here for a purpose.
Speaker 1: My purpose is to help to inspire, to give hope
Speaker 1: where hope has possibly been lost. And that's what just
Speaker 1: gives me like the all right, cool, Yes, I went
Speaker 1: through this, but it's worth it because I'm gonna be
Speaker 1: able to help someone else we have to see outside
Speaker 1: of ourselves and that gives you this crazy power you guys, like,
Speaker 1: and that's when people ask me, like, what you are
Speaker 1: shining so different? Yeah? I lost weight. Yes I have
Speaker 1: a good guy in my life, but you know what,
Speaker 1: I lost all fear of what people are gonna think
Speaker 1: of what if they're not gonna like me. That's another thing,
Speaker 1: you guys. We do things to please other people women,
Speaker 1: and I have found myself like I've done this in
Speaker 1: the past where I buy things not necessarily to catch
Speaker 1: a guy's attention, but to compete with another woman. And
Speaker 1: I'm like, how much money did I invest on ridiculous
Speaker 1: things that I don't even use that are in my
Speaker 1: closet collecting dust because I wanted to up this girl
Speaker 1: or I wanted to show like, oh I have this,
Speaker 1: or oh you have that too, I have it too.
Speaker 1: It's like so dumb that we do that so much,
Speaker 1: and it's it's honestly, it's worth Honestly, it's just it's
Speaker 1: a waste of time. Been there, done that. I admitted
Speaker 1: one hundred percent, and I'm so happy to say I'm
Speaker 1: my own competition. I just want to be better than
Speaker 1: I was yesterday, and that's it. If there are a
Speaker 1: few tips that I can give you, guys, if you
Speaker 1: don't know where to start, if you're kind of like, okay,
Speaker 1: maybe I am on more of like a superficial type
Speaker 1: of confidence right now, and I want to work on
Speaker 1: more of my confidence, you know, my inner abilities. I
Speaker 1: think what's important is what you feed yourself on a
Speaker 1: daily basis, what you listen to, what you watch, who
Speaker 1: you follow. There are people that I follow that I
Speaker 1: mute because I don't want to be rude, and it's
Speaker 1: like I love that person and I know what they
Speaker 1: are in the real world and they're someone completely different
Speaker 1: on Instagram that I have to mute them because I'm like,
Speaker 1: I love you, but I don't like who you are
Speaker 1: on social media. Even that is loving yourself and feeding yourself,
Speaker 1: like just choosing I want to feed myself good stuff.
Speaker 1: I want to listen to different type of podcasts. I
Speaker 1: want to read books that are going to help me.
Speaker 1: If you don't want to call it self help because
Speaker 1: people are like, oh my god, no, it's like, then
Speaker 1: don't call it that. Call a book that's really going
Speaker 1: to teach you something. Whatever you want to call that
Speaker 1: you know it's listening to certain things what you're watching
Speaker 1: on social media. I'm telling you, guys, if you're watching
Speaker 1: the wrong things, it will give you so much anxiety.
Speaker 1: A lot of the times now I post, I comment
Speaker 1: back to a few people, I get out because I
Speaker 1: get disappointed a lot on social media with I'm like, damn,
Speaker 1: am I really seeing the real thing? Am I? And
Speaker 1: I'm like, I just I want to be in real life.
Speaker 1: And I've caught myself not posting as much as I
Speaker 1: used to. And it's not because I don't want to
Speaker 1: or I I mean because I have my companies and
Speaker 1: there's certain things that I have to post, but sometimes
Speaker 1: I'm just like I need a break, you know. So
Speaker 1: those are small tips of like what you can do. Also,
Speaker 1: aligning yourself every day, you know, I tell you guys
Speaker 1: all this to all the time. You know, you don't
Speaker 1: have to meditate, because I know meditation is hard, but
Speaker 1: there is guided meditation you guys that will help you
Speaker 1: just align yourself to your higher self, to the higher power,
Speaker 1: and it just sets the tone of your day. When
Speaker 1: I don't do it, I feel completely different. You can
Speaker 1: pray whatever it is that feeds your soul. And makes
Speaker 1: you feel good. Do that so that you can align
Speaker 1: your I think sometimes we're just so caught up in
Speaker 1: things that are just superficial and aren't real. You need
Speaker 1: a ground. We need to ground ourselves daily. And I'm
Speaker 1: telling you this because I have to do it. There
Speaker 1: are times when I'm so caught up in the cheekys
Speaker 1: world that I'm like, I need a few Jennet Jeanne
Speaker 1: is down here. Let me bring her up and let
Speaker 1: me feed her and let me do what's gonna make
Speaker 1: her happy, so she helps Cheeky's. And I know it
Speaker 1: sounds crazy, but like that's the way I see it.
Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, I'm two cheekies. I'm too caught up.
Speaker 1: I'm too caught up, and I have to ground myself
Speaker 1: and I have to balance myself. So just always remember
Speaker 1: that when you're feeling a little in Las Nubis in
Speaker 1: the clouds, go hug a tree. And I know that
Speaker 1: sounds crazy, but literally go I'm telling you, literally, go
Speaker 1: hug a tree, hug it and be Okay. I'm in
Speaker 1: ground myself. I'm here on earth. I am human, I
Speaker 1: have responsibilities, but I'm here, Like you have to ground yourself,
Speaker 1: like I literally do that, or I rub my feet together,
Speaker 1: or I smell roses, or I touch something that's like
Speaker 1: from nature, Like it's just it helps me. So those
Speaker 1: are just small things. And just check yourself every day,
Speaker 1: you know, I do it. I also get off tracks
Speaker 1: sometimes and I'm caught up in things that are necessarily
Speaker 1: serving my highest good. And I pray every day and
Speaker 1: I ask God. I'm like God, remove and anything or
Speaker 1: anyone that no longer serves my highest good because I
Speaker 1: want to be my best self every day. And there
Speaker 1: are times that I entertain relationships that I know that
Speaker 1: I shouldn't. Not like a loving relationship like a media
Speaker 1: I'm talking about like a relationship like it could be
Speaker 1: a friendship, it could be a business relationship where I'm like,
Speaker 1: I know that this isn't good for me, but I
Speaker 1: entertain it for the sake of not hurting their feelings
Speaker 1: or whatever the heck. But it's not necessarily good for me,
Speaker 1: and I need to just sometimes give myself a little
Speaker 1: pat on the ass and say, hey, you know better.
Speaker 1: You know better, So just know it's a process, definitely
Speaker 1: a process. But if you are intentional about it, and
Speaker 1: you're like, I want to do this, even if it's
Speaker 1: a little uncomfortable at first, it'll become a habit. The
Speaker 1: more you do it, it becomes a habit, you guys.
Speaker 1: So practice makes perfect. So yes, I hope that you
Speaker 1: guys understood everything I said and it resonates with you
Speaker 1: in some way, And just don't forget what's important in
Speaker 1: this world, what's really important, the things that are going
Speaker 1: to leave this earth with you, which is your soul,
Speaker 1: your spirit? What are you going to leave? What footprint
Speaker 1: are you going to leave on this earth? What do
Speaker 1: you want people to remember you for? Ask yourself those
Speaker 1: questions and if it is materialistic things and fuck it,
Speaker 1: that's you and that's who you want to be, then
Speaker 1: great own it. But really, no, this is who I
Speaker 1: am and this is what I want the world to
Speaker 1: remember me for. So that was today's episode. You guys,
Speaker 1: thank you for listening. I really felted in my heart
Speaker 1: to talk about this, and again, I hope it helped
Speaker 1: some of you to recognize where you're at right now.
Speaker 1: And it's okay if you're caught in the fluff. Been there,
Speaker 1: done that, but we just got to shake it off
Speaker 1: a little bit. I love you, guys. I appreciate you
Speaker 1: very much. Thank you for listening to my podcasts and
Speaker 1: I will catch you on the next episode of Cheeky's
Speaker 1: and Chill Let's Get On. This is a production of
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