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Speaker 1: It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if

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Speaker 1: you need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more,

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Speaker 1: please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com.

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Speaker 1: All you have to do is click submit Strawberry Letter

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Speaker 1: and we could be reading your letter live on the air,

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Speaker 1: just like I'm going to read this one right here,

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Speaker 1: right now. You never know it could be yours. Do

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Speaker 1: you never know? You never know? Buckle up and hold

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Speaker 1: on tight. We got it toy you here. It is

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Speaker 1: a Strawberry Letter. Thank you. Fhe subject I didn't mean

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Speaker 1: what I said. Dear Stephen Shirley. My husband and I

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Speaker 1: have been married for eight years and we've known each

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Speaker 1: other fifteen years. We have been through ups and downs

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Speaker 1: like most couples, but when we argue, it's because of

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Speaker 1: something that my husband has remembered from the past. I

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Speaker 1: won't say he's insecure, but he's always worried about me

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Speaker 1: leaving him for my ex boyfriend or this female I

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Speaker 1: pulled around with one time when we were separated. I

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Speaker 1: guess it's my fault for him thinking I would leave him,

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Speaker 1: because when I get mad, I say a lot of

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Speaker 1: things I do not mean. I want to hurt him

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Speaker 1: and win the argument. I always have to fix it

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Speaker 1: for days after we've made up. The last fight we

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Speaker 1: had is a lot different because I was still mad

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Speaker 1: days later and he overheard me on the phone with

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Speaker 1: the woman I used to fool around with. I told

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Speaker 1: her that my husband is mediocre in bed and she

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Speaker 1: has way better skills than he does. I told her

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Speaker 1: that my ex boyfriend has been begging for me to

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Speaker 1: meet up with him at a hotel hump by his house,

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Speaker 1: and I was thinking about going because he has a

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Speaker 1: lot more stamina than my husband does. I wasn't paying

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Speaker 1: attention to the camera that we have on the front porch,

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Speaker 1: or the fact that it has a microphone on it.

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Speaker 1: My husband was in the house and heard the entire conversation.

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Speaker 1: Conversation Yeah, I continued to sit on the porch after

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Speaker 1: my call, and he talked through the camera to tell

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Speaker 1: me to come inside. I tried to tell him that

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Speaker 1: I was still upset and I didn't mean anything I said,

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Speaker 1: but there was no way to fix it. I really

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Speaker 1: don't think my side chick has better skills than him.

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Speaker 1: I was talking b s because I was still salty

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Speaker 1: with him. I've never cheated on him unless we were separated,

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Speaker 1: So I need him to believe that it wasn't serious.

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Speaker 1: I wasn't serious. How do I get my husband to

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Speaker 1: trust me again? Please help? Wow? Trust is a hard

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Speaker 1: thing and this is just not cool what you're doing. Okay,

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Speaker 1: you really, really you need to grow up. I mean

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Speaker 1: you're very immature. Words hurt words lead to actions. That's

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Speaker 1: why your husband is upset. He thinks you know because

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Speaker 1: you said it, you did it, and you need to

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Speaker 1: stop saying stupid stuff that you don't mean. You can't

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Speaker 1: take any of that stuff back. You can't take it

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Speaker 1: back periods. It's common sense that if it's the only

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Speaker 1: thing you guys argue about, this is what you say.

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Speaker 1: According to you, is what you've said in the past.

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Speaker 1: That you should stop talking. Your husband is not insecure,

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Speaker 1: but like most men, he's got an ego, a fragile ego,

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Speaker 1: and no man wants to hear that someone else has

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Speaker 1: better skills than him or more stamina than him. What

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Speaker 1: is wrong with you? You really need to stop this.

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Speaker 1: I mean, even if you say you haven't cheated, he's

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Speaker 1: not gonna believe you because he heard what you said.

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Speaker 1: He heard it coming out of your mouth. You're playing

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Speaker 1: a dangerous game here with your husband, with your marriage,

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Speaker 1: all of that trust. That's a big thing in marriage,

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Speaker 1: a very very important thing. Once it's broken, it's really

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Speaker 1: really hard to get back, if ever, if at all.

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Speaker 1: But your husband is still here, he's still there with you,

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Speaker 1: so maybe there's a chance. So you got to stop

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Speaker 1: playing with this feelings. You've got to grow up. You're

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Speaker 1: hitting way below the belt if you don't stop this

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Speaker 1: and work on fixing your marriage and trying to get

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Speaker 1: your husband to come back around. And these are things

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Speaker 1: that you've broken, you got to lose him. You really

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Speaker 1: are Steve. Wow, this is really one of the more

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Speaker 1: ignorant letters we've had in a while, and we've had

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Speaker 1: some ignorant ones. The subject is I didn't mean what

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Speaker 1: I said. The problem is he heard you. This Your

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Speaker 1: whole problem, this whole thing is her. I don't you know,

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Speaker 1: I don't even know. I don't even know how this

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Speaker 1: dude still hell, this one of the worst. Look y'all

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Speaker 1: been married eight years, y'all known each other fifteen, she said,

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Speaker 1: we've been through ups and downs like most couples. But

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Speaker 1: when we argue, no, this ain't like most couples now

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Speaker 1: not reading this letters like most couples. I want to

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Speaker 1: tell you this right now. This is rare. But when

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Speaker 1: we argut, it's because of something that my husband has

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Speaker 1: remembered from the pain. And I won't say he's insecure,

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Speaker 1: but he's always worried about me leaving him. Now why

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Speaker 1: was he worried about him leaving him? Guess what she

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Speaker 1: says for my ex boyfriend, all this female o food

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Speaker 1: around with one time we was separated. Now, let's just

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Speaker 1: deal with that part right him. Your husband has an

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Speaker 1: awful lot to weary him about what he looking at?

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Speaker 1: What's she looking at? What you're looking at him? Fault?

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Speaker 1: What you're looking at her fault. Everybody walked by is

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Speaker 1: a potential threat. Can't even relax. If a guy walked by,

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Speaker 1: that's a threat. If a woman walked by, that's a threat. Girl, girl,

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Speaker 1: you you too much? And she did. She said, I

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Speaker 1: guess it's my fault for him thinking I would leave

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Speaker 1: him because we're not getting mad. I say a lot

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Speaker 1: of things I do not mean I want to hurt

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Speaker 1: him and win the argument. Are you stupid? Hurting don't

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Speaker 1: mean you win? What is y'all? Y'all have an argument

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Speaker 1: trying to one up each other. Listen, when you argue

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Speaker 1: with your wife, this ain't cracking or the joneses. Your

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Speaker 1: mama's so fat. Your MoMA's so fat, she need a

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Speaker 1: belt on the side of the equator. Well, your mama's

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Speaker 1: so fat that what this is? Are y'all argument to

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Speaker 1: one up each other? Immature? That's not winning an argument?

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Speaker 1: All right, Hold on, Steve, we'll have part two of

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Speaker 1: your response coming up at twenty three minutes after the hour.

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Speaker 1: Subject up today's strawberry letter. I didn't mean what I said.

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Speaker 1: We'll get back into it right after this. You're listening

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Speaker 1: Steve Harvey Morning Show. All right, come on, Steve, let's

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Speaker 1: recap today's strawberry letter. The subject I didn't mean what

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Speaker 1: I said. I didn't mean it. Well, but what you're

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Speaker 1: saying it for? Because y'all are like fools. First of all,

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Speaker 1: you've been together for fifteen years, but you think your

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Speaker 1: man is insecure because he's afraid you're gonna leave him

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Speaker 1: for your ex boyfriend all or female you fooled around

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Speaker 1: with when y'all are separated? Who who? Just a lot

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Speaker 1: to worry about? Yeah, he can he can't get on.

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Speaker 1: He can't. I'm going out with the girls for a

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Speaker 1: happy hour, happy hour with them with the what with who? See,

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Speaker 1: he ain't got to worry about who's gonna be down there.

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Speaker 1: All he gotta worry about it is people are gonna

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Speaker 1: be dying. There's some people. See most people we got

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Speaker 1: to worry about who all gonna be down now? And

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Speaker 1: they're the dude wait to hear some other dude's names

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Speaker 1: or a woman, wait to hear some women name. When

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Speaker 1: you say you're going to have the hour, your first

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Speaker 1: question is it's people gonna be there because y'all appetite everybody.

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Speaker 1: And then I guess it's my fault for him thinking

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Speaker 1: I would leave him when I get mad because I

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Speaker 1: see a lot of things I don't mean because I

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Speaker 1: want to hurt him and win an argument. Hurting a

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Speaker 1: person that's how you win an argument. No, you gotta

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Speaker 1: stop thinking of winning an argument and thinking about settling

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Speaker 1: an argument. If you're arguing to win, you're not going

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Speaker 1: to do that so now and then you always got

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Speaker 1: to fix it for days after we've been made up.

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Speaker 1: In the last fight we had a lot of it

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Speaker 1: was was a lot different because I was still mad

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Speaker 1: days later, and he overheard me on the phone with

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Speaker 1: the woman I used to fool around when I told

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Speaker 1: her on the phone that my husband is mediocretting bad

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Speaker 1: and she got way better skills than he do. And

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Speaker 1: he heard this with the woman you used to fool

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Speaker 1: around with. He heard that. Now that ain't insecurity. That's

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Speaker 1: not insecure. That ain't that's he heard him. That's a

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Speaker 1: blatant statement. And you wasn't trying to hurt him because

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Speaker 1: you was talking about him without his knowledge. So now

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Speaker 1: this ain't how you win this argument because you're talking

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Speaker 1: about the man behind his back. So you can't say

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Speaker 1: that you was trying to win an argument by hurting him.

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Speaker 1: You wasn't even talking to him. Then I told her

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Speaker 1: that my ex boyfriend been begging me to meet up

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Speaker 1: with him at a hotel by his house, and I

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Speaker 1: was thinking about going because he got a lot more

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Speaker 1: stamina than my husband do. Now, women, now this man

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Speaker 1: is here, and the first of all, he ain't got

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Speaker 1: no skill. Now, he ain't got no stamminents that what

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Speaker 1: is he? Why is he? Hell? See? And then once

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Speaker 1: again you talk to people, he good, heap better, you know,

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Speaker 1: you're too much to satisfy. I don't see so far

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Speaker 1: on this that I don't even know why you still

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Speaker 1: calling me your huss because I'm telling you right now

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Speaker 1: this end. So I wasn't paying attention to the camera

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Speaker 1: that we got on front porch and he got microphone on.

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Speaker 1: My husband in the house heard entire conversation I said

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Speaker 1: on the porch. After the call, he talked through the camera,

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Speaker 1: told me to come inside. I tried to tell him

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Speaker 1: I was still upsetting. Didn't mean anything I said, but

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Speaker 1: there was no way to fix it. I really don't

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Speaker 1: think my side chick has better skills in him. Are

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Speaker 1: you listening to what you're writing? You're so damn stupid.

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Speaker 1: You type stupid See not only do you say stupid stuff,

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Speaker 1: ain't stupid stuff? You type stupid stuff. Yeah? Yeah, you

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Speaker 1: actually said, I don't think my side chick has better

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Speaker 1: skills him. What. I've never cheated on him unless we

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Speaker 1: were separated. What you just y'all wasn't separated when you

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Speaker 1: was in here telling your girlfriend that she had better

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Speaker 1: skill and your ex boyfriend that you were talking about

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Speaker 1: till your side chick because she don't care. Because all

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Speaker 1: y'all do everything. And I was talking bs because I

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Speaker 1: was still salty with him. Oh so I need I

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Speaker 1: need him to believe that I wasn't serious. How do

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Speaker 1: I get my husband to trust me again? Please help?

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Speaker 1: Question number one? How is he still your husband? See this,

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Speaker 1: I'm stuck with just him because you not my wife,

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Speaker 1: because you belong to too many people. You the other woman,

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Speaker 1: You got a side chick cheating with you, You got

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Speaker 1: a boyfriend. I'm just gonna be real. This is Drew,

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Speaker 1: this is this. Ain't no marriage. Try and quit quit

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Speaker 1: asking us fixed stuff that's unfixable. Y'all need Bishop jakeson

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Speaker 1: somebody like this, because I ain't got nothing for you.

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Speaker 1: I don't know. Just too many people in here. Oh lord,

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Speaker 1: you come to waitress, Here, come to matrix. Here come

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Speaker 1: the water, Oh the dishwasher, Oh the bus boy. Oh

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Speaker 1: look at you. Oh look at this girl over here

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Speaker 1: sitting next This man just rubbed up against me. It's

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Speaker 1: just too many people in me. I'm confused, I'm hot,

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Speaker 1: I'm home this it's just too much going on. Girl child,

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Speaker 1: I can't even eat everybody in here. Friend to me,

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Speaker 1: I'm just slobbling on myself. It's too much all right,

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Speaker 1: please leave your comments on today's Strawberry Letters, like both

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Speaker 1: of them are, like, oh, it's about six to five

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Speaker 1: people in here. I go to Steve Harvey at them

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Speaker 1: dot com and check out the Strawberry Letter podcasts as well.

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Speaker 1: Coming up. By after it was Junior and Sports Talk.

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Speaker 1: Right after this, you're listening to the Stave Harvey Morning

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Speaker 1: Show