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Speaker 1: Well, it's time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if

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Speaker 1: you need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more,

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Speaker 1: please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com

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Speaker 1: and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your

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Speaker 1: letter live on the air, just like we're going to

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Speaker 1: read this one right here, right now. Who knows it

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Speaker 1: could be yours?

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Speaker 2: Buck it up, hold on tight, we got it. Poy

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Speaker 2: you here. It is the Strawberry.

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Speaker 1: Letters subject his ex wife won't let me visit him

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Speaker 1: here Stephen Shirley, My boyfriend and I have been dating

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Speaker 1: for about five months and he's the best man I've

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Speaker 1: ever been with, and he treats me really good. There's

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Speaker 1: a situation that I'm dealing with and my man doesn't

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Speaker 1: understand why it's bothering me. When we first met, he

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Speaker 1: had just gotten a divorce. I mean it was literally

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Speaker 1: finalized the day before I met him. Because it was

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Speaker 1: a quick divorce, he was still living in the house

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Speaker 1: he shared with his wife. He said they didn't put

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Speaker 1: the house in the divorce settlement because it was his

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Speaker 1: wife's house in her name. I thought within months of

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Speaker 1: getting a divorce he'd move out we even went to

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Speaker 1: look at apartments and rental houses together. Then he informed

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Speaker 1: me that he decided to stay in the house with

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Speaker 1: his ex wife because she agreed to let him rent

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Speaker 1: his man cave area of the house. He said. The

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Speaker 1: room is on the second floor and it's got a

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Speaker 1: bathroom attached to it and a wet bar section with

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Speaker 1: a tiny fridge in it. He said he's got access

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Speaker 1: to a bedroom upstairs too, because his wife doesn't go

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Speaker 1: upstairs at all. I asked him about the common areas

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Speaker 1: they have to share, and he assured me that he

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Speaker 1: had it all worked out. This has put a strain

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Speaker 1: on our relationship because he has to stay at my

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Speaker 1: house all of the time since I'm not allowed to

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Speaker 1: visit him or even step foot on this woman's property.

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Speaker 1: I popped over there last week to see what would happen,

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Speaker 1: and his ex wife met me in the door and said,

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Speaker 1: if I don't like her rules, then I should let

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Speaker 1: him move in with me. I left and called and

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Speaker 1: cursed him out. He doesn't understand how crazy this is.

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Speaker 1: I'm getting the vibe that he's a sorry but man.

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Speaker 1: Yeah right, that's what she said. What is really going

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Speaker 1: on here? Please help you know what, I don't like

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Speaker 1: this situation at all for you, because this arrangement is

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Speaker 1: just really stupid. I mean, what are you getting out

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Speaker 1: of this? You're getting nothing but stress and misery and unhappiness.

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Speaker 1: This so called best guy that you've ever had is

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Speaker 1: living with his ex wife and paying her rent to

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Speaker 1: live there. As much time as you say he spends

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Speaker 1: at your place. Why don't you charge him rent? You

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Speaker 1: should be charging him rent. Maybe that will help him

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Speaker 1: to understand that it's time to get out of his

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Speaker 1: wife's house and move on with you in his life.

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Speaker 1: That means getting his own place. You said, you guys

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Speaker 1: have looked at places, what happened. That means getting his

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Speaker 1: own place where you're invited, where you can go over

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Speaker 1: there and hang out and spend the night, things like

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Speaker 1: that that couples do. It makes absolutely no sense for

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Speaker 1: him to still be staying there unless unless he's, you know,

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Speaker 1: having trouble letting go.

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Speaker 2: He might be.

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Speaker 1: Remember you said he treats you really well, so he

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Speaker 1: should have moved out when his wife spoke to you

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Speaker 1: so rudely when you popped up over there, his story

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Speaker 1: behind did nothing. Okay, he's not right for you. I mean,

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Speaker 1: he can barely take care of himself at this point,

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Speaker 1: so you need to do for yourself what he can't

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Speaker 1: do for himself. And that's move on. It's only been

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Speaker 1: five months. You'll be all right.

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Speaker 2: You'll be all right, Steve. Well, this letter got I

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Speaker 2: don't believe it written all over it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I do not understand why this woman is writing

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Speaker 3: this letter because it don't make no sense.

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Speaker 2: How much time I got to deal with this before

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Speaker 2: we gonna break you? All right?

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Speaker 3: Say here, what does now? You first met this man,

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Speaker 3: best man you ever had? Do you never treat you

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Speaker 3: really good? We first met he had just gotten divorced,

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Speaker 3: literally finalized the day before I met.

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Speaker 2: Him, Danger Will Robinson. Danger just got out.

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Speaker 3: Now, I know marriages are over long before the date

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Speaker 3: is finalized, so they probably been going through this.

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Speaker 2: But you did say it was a quick divorce.

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Speaker 3: So he was still living in the house that he

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Speaker 3: shared with his wife, and they didn't put the house

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Speaker 3: in the divorce settlement because it was his wife's house

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Speaker 3: in her name. Well, you can't put it in the

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Speaker 3: divorce settlement because of what he did that brought about

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Speaker 3: the quick divorce. You never mentioned that, and now you

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Speaker 3: ain't getting this house. You got to get out. This

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Speaker 3: is my damn house. So now that's why that didn't

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Speaker 3: get put in the divorce settlement. I thought after months,

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Speaker 3: I thought, within months of getting a divorce, he'd move out.

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Speaker 3: Y'all went to look at apartments and rental houses together.

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Speaker 2: He wasn't serious. He was just you know, you know,

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Speaker 2: appeasing you.

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Speaker 3: Then he informed me that he decided to stay in

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Speaker 3: the house with his ex wife because she agreed to

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Speaker 3: let him rent his man cave area of the house.

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Speaker 3: He said, the room is on the second floor, and

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Speaker 3: it's got a bathroom attached to it, a wet bar section.

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Speaker 2: With a tiny fridge in it.

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Speaker 3: Listen to me, you mean to tell me that a

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Speaker 3: man gets divorced and his option is to stay in

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Speaker 3: the house with the wife that you've divorced because you

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Speaker 3: got a man cave in it with a access to

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Speaker 3: a bathroom and a tiny fridge. Now later on they say,

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Speaker 3: and the bedroom is he's accessible.

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Speaker 2: Is on another floor.

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Speaker 3: What girl, A man cave can't mean nothing much to

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Speaker 3: you if you ain't the king no more. See, a

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Speaker 3: man cave is only good is if you the king

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Speaker 3: and you got a man cave. But if you ain't the.

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Speaker 2: King no more. You ain't got a man cave. You're

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Speaker 2: a renter.

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Speaker 3: Matter of fact, you just a B and B. I

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Speaker 3: don't even see how you do. He ain't got nothing.

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Speaker 3: When we come back, I'm gonna break your heart. I'm

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Speaker 3: gonna break you het.

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Speaker 1: All right, Steve, hang on, we'll have part two of

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Speaker 1: your response.

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Speaker 2: To a man cave. Got a little boy, got a

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Speaker 2: turney fridge, little bitty fridge. Coming up.

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Speaker 1: Steve's response Part two at twenty three minutes after the

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Speaker 1: hour Strawberry letter subject for today his ex wife won't

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Speaker 1: let me visit him. We'll get back into it right

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Speaker 1: after this. You're listening, Steve Hardy Morning Show. All right, Steve,

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Speaker 1: come on, let's recap today's Strawberry letter. The subject his

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Speaker 1: ex wife won't let me visit him.

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Speaker 2: This man got a divorce.

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Speaker 3: You met him right after he got the divorce, y'all,

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Speaker 3: the best man you ever met.

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Speaker 2: You say.

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Speaker 3: It was a quick divorce, so they didn't put the

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Speaker 3: house into the divorce settlement because it was his wife's

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Speaker 3: house and in her name, So you thought. Within months

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Speaker 3: of getting the divorce, he moved out. Y'all went an

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Speaker 3: apartment looking and everything that was just to appease you.

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Speaker 3: Then it informed you that he decided to stay in

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Speaker 3: the house with his ex wife because she agreed. She

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Speaker 3: agreed to let him rent his man cave area of

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Speaker 3: the house. Now, he said, the room is on the

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Speaker 3: second floor. It's got a bathroom attached to it. Which

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Speaker 3: anything that's got a bathroom attached to it on the

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Speaker 3: second floor is not a full bath. It's a half bath, sink, toilet.

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Speaker 3: Uh oh, I want you to understand this.

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Speaker 2: Now.

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Speaker 3: They don't put showers and stuff on on little areas.

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Speaker 3: They don't have beds in regular houses.

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Speaker 2: They don't. I'm just telling you.

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Speaker 3: He said, the rooms on the second floor, it's got

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Speaker 3: bathroom attached to it and a wet bar section. So

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Speaker 3: that means there's a sink, a sink over there with

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Speaker 3: a tiny refrigerator in it. He got access to a bedroom.

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Speaker 3: But the bedroom is upstairs. What because his wife doesn't

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Speaker 3: go upstairs at all? What in her house she don't

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Speaker 3: go upstairs at all? So you ask him about the

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Speaker 3: common areas that they have to share, and he ensued me,

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Speaker 3: ensured me that he has had it all worked out.

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Speaker 3: So now he don't even have an area of his own.

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Speaker 3: He got common areas with his ex wife. This is

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Speaker 3: put a strain on our relationship because he's had to

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Speaker 3: stay at my house all of the time since I'm

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Speaker 3: not allowed to visit him or step foot on this

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Speaker 3: woman's property.

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Speaker 2: Now, guess what this crazy woman does.

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Speaker 3: I popped up over there last week to see what

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Speaker 3: would happen, and his ex wife met me at the

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Speaker 3: door and said, if I don't like her rules, then

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Speaker 3: you should then I.

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Speaker 2: Should let him move in with me.

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Speaker 3: First of all, you should have never done that. And

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Speaker 3: what you think the woman was gonna say, oh, hey,

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Speaker 3: nice to meet you, come on in in her house

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Speaker 3: that's in her name, that he'dne already he done told

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Speaker 3: him she didne told him he ain't the king no more.

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Speaker 2: This ain't a man cave. This a room.

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Speaker 3: I'm gonna give you access to a bedroom that's upstairs,

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Speaker 3: and you're gonna pay me money, and then told you,

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Speaker 3: if you don't like the rules and all, to let

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Speaker 3: him move in me.

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Speaker 2: I left, called and cussed him out. What you cussed

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Speaker 2: him out for? He told you? I asked, couldn't come

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Speaker 2: over there? Right?

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Speaker 3: He said, don't come over here, this hell for crazy,

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Speaker 3: This her house, she making all the rules. He doesn't

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Speaker 3: understand how crazy this is. I'm getting the vibe that

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Speaker 3: he's a sorry ass man, you think, because I'm gonna

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Speaker 3: tell you what's really going on? She say, what's really

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Speaker 3: going on? Please help me?

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Speaker 2: All right?

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Speaker 3: First of all, I'm gonna tell you what's really going on.

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Speaker 3: Number one, he ain't got no money, because any man

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Speaker 3: that gets a divorce is not gonna live in a

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Speaker 3: subservient position like this with all these rules. He can't

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Speaker 3: have a company, right, You can't date, and you done

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Speaker 3: brought your ass over there to just see what would happen,

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Speaker 3: and you do the damn near got cussed out.

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Speaker 2: So now let's go over what this man has. One

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Speaker 2: a tiny fridge, okay, he's stuck on that.

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Speaker 3: Two access to a bedroom which is not his.

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Speaker 2: He just got access to it.

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Speaker 3: He has a bath that's probably a half bath. They

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Speaker 3: have to share common areas. And if she in now,

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Speaker 3: she can tell him it ain't common. Right now, your

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Speaker 3: ass back in your man cave, just your space is

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Speaker 3: the man cave? Next one, it's her house, it's in

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Speaker 3: her name. Here's the next one. She makes all the rules.

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Speaker 3: Here's the next one. She told you if he don't

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Speaker 3: like it, he can move in with you. Listen to me,

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Speaker 3: A man cave can't mean that much when you ain't

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Speaker 3: king no more, and he done gave up all rights

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Speaker 3: as king. See, what makes you have a man cave

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Speaker 3: is when you king of the castle and your wife

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Speaker 3: gives you a space that she don't lie the kids

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Speaker 3: come in. Nothing that's yours. You can do it like

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Speaker 3: you want to, cause you the husband, that's your area. Baby,

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Speaker 3: do it like you want to. Y'all want to watch

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Speaker 3: a game video, whatever you want to do, if that's

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Speaker 3: your room.

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Speaker 2: He don't have that no more. You know why because

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Speaker 2: now he written that.

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Speaker 3: So you see he has nothing and he ain't got

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Speaker 3: no money, because why would I rent this space that

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Speaker 3: I can't even have company in when I could take

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Speaker 3: my money and get me an apartment. But he can't

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Speaker 3: go get the apartment with you because he ain't got

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Speaker 3: his money, right because he lost it in the divorce.

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Speaker 2: She ain't just take the house. She got the savings.

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Speaker 3: Because whatever he did to get put out.

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Speaker 2: He got to pay for it.

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Speaker 3: You get the feeling here, Sorry, ass man, she do too.

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Speaker 3: That's why he got that damn man came and he

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Speaker 3: paying rent in it, and he got access to a

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Speaker 3: common area and he can't have no company like he's sixteen.

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Speaker 2: All right, Steve.

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Speaker 1: Post your comments on today's Strawberry Letter at Steve Harvey FM,

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Speaker 1: on Instagram and feed da Teenage check out the Strawberry

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Speaker 1: Letter podcast on demand. You're listening to the Dave Harvey

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Speaker 1: Morning Show.