Speaker 1: Hello.
Speaker 2: This is Craig Ferguson. And even though you are listening
Speaker 2: to my podcast right now, I'm currently out on the
Speaker 2: Fancy Rascal Tour.
Speaker 1: Come and see me in.
Speaker 2: Such beautiful places as Wichita, Kansas, Springfield, Missouri, Kansas City, Missouri, Omaha, Nebraska, Domine, Iowa,
Speaker 2: Iowa City, Iowa, and many others. For the full list
Speaker 2: of dates, please go to my website, the Craig Ferguson
Speaker 2: Show dot Com slash Tour. My name is Craig Ferguson.
Speaker 2: This podcast is called Joy. It's not Rocket Science. I
Speaker 2: talk to people I like about their pursuit of happiness.
Speaker 2: Here's Angela Kinsey, one of my bestie friends. A star
Speaker 2: of the hit US TV show In the Office. She
Speaker 2: is now the co host of a big successful podcast
Speaker 2: based on a TV show called The Office. Enjoy.
Speaker 1: How are you pal? Yeah, you were playing tennis today.
Speaker 1: I didn't know you were.
Speaker 2: I was nearly said teeny tiny tennis player, and then
Speaker 2: I thought that's not very nice.
Speaker 3: I am a tiny tennis player. It's true. I'm the
Speaker 3: shortest of my tennis group. Shocker, look at me playing
Speaker 3: to the camera.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's right, that's cameras mm hmmm.
Speaker 3: Oh look, there's there's your clip. Wait do you see
Speaker 3: my feet? Can you see that?
Speaker 2: I'm I can't see your feet. I have beautiful feet,
Speaker 2: but they have a slight anomally. My big toe is
Speaker 2: not my biggest toe. My toe next to my big
Speaker 2: toe is bigger. So it was up, but then it
Speaker 2: goes down, the kind of.
Speaker 3: There's some meaning I've read somewhere. I can't remember it.
Speaker 2: It means I had a girlfriend once it said it
Speaker 2: means that you're intelligent, and I was like, does it really?
Speaker 2: I don't know. I think you can have foot based
Speaker 2: I Q. I think she was being nice to me.
Speaker 3: It was just breaks out by your words.
Speaker 1: Out it makes you more intelligent.
Speaker 2: Can I go.
Speaker 3: Just cover put a sock on it?
Speaker 1: Oh no, keep your songs on. It's just a thing.
Speaker 2: I like it.
Speaker 1: So tennis, though, I don't why. I don't understand.
Speaker 2: How did you get into tennis when you were growing
Speaker 2: up in Jakarta. I was going to say Jakara. I
Speaker 2: know why I remember Jakarta because of the old joke
Speaker 2: about Jakarta.
Speaker 3: There's an old.
Speaker 2: Stand up joke about old stand up jokes about Jamaica
Speaker 2: and Jakarta.
Speaker 1: Get on. I'm telling you right.
Speaker 2: So I say, I say, I say my wife's gone
Speaker 2: to the West Indies Jamaica, Jamaica or no.
Speaker 1: She went of her own accord. That's what the old phone.
Speaker 3: Okay.
Speaker 2: And then I say, I say, my wife's gone to
Speaker 2: the East Indies Jakarta.
Speaker 1: No, she went of her own ACCORDA.
Speaker 3: Oh, it's so bad, so bad.
Speaker 2: I think Jakarta is involved in I do remember you
Speaker 2: grew up in Jakarta anyway, Yeah, and that's where you
Speaker 2: developed your love of tennis.
Speaker 3: Well, my mom played tennis. My mom was always playing tennis.
Speaker 3: I was just always on the court with her and
Speaker 3: there was no like iPad. So she would just be
Speaker 3: like here, go hit that ball against the wall for
Speaker 3: like an hour.
Speaker 1: So I just hit the racketball. That's a whole different
Speaker 1: thing though.
Speaker 3: Because this ball bounces.
Speaker 1: Okay, this racketball. Did you play racketball too?
Speaker 2: Not?
Speaker 3: If I have to? Okay, why am I throwing so
Speaker 3: much shade record?
Speaker 1: It's like you he racket ball.
Speaker 3: It's a wonderful spot.
Speaker 1: That's the that's the clickbait from this. Yes, really the racketball.
Speaker 3: None of the other stuff, just that. No, So it
Speaker 3: was you know Indonesia, we had no television, We were
Speaker 3: outside all the time.
Speaker 2: Why were you in Indonesia? Why were your parents in Indonesia?
Speaker 2: These spies?
Speaker 3: But that's out there now, Okay. No, my dad was
Speaker 3: a drilling engineer.
Speaker 1: That's right. It was oil oil.
Speaker 2: Well, because you're kind of not your accent isn't Indonesia.
Speaker 2: I don't know what an Indonesian accent sounds like, but
Speaker 2: it doesn't. I don't think it's a good idea that
Speaker 2: I attempt to.
Speaker 3: I don't don't think you should.
Speaker 1: I'm not going to.
Speaker 3: I wouldn't advise it. But when I speak Indonesian, I.
Speaker 1: Think when you speak Indonesian, think so.
Speaker 3: My sisters do my sisters like if they like if
Speaker 3: I said sakatang sayaba dada deanan Craig right now I'm
Speaker 3: talking to you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's so cool.
Speaker 3: My sister would be like, sakarangjara dingan Craig, that's great.
Speaker 3: That love to mile. I don't want I don't want anything.
Speaker 1: Well, how come that? What wage were you when you
Speaker 1: came back from fourteen?
Speaker 3: I moved there when I was two.
Speaker 2: Oh wow, so you must like identify really as Indonesian. Really,
Speaker 2: quite a lot.
Speaker 3: It's my whole childhood. So and I also didn't know
Speaker 3: any pop culture, like when we came to the States.
Speaker 1: That's such a gift.
Speaker 3: I didn't know any like references.
Speaker 2: A fourteen, fourteen year old.
Speaker 3: It made me a weird I was I was an outcast.
Speaker 3: I was weird out.
Speaker 2: Was it traumatic because that's like junior high that's the
Speaker 2: worst time to move.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, it was horrible. It was horrible. First,
Speaker 3: Why you were in comedy, Yes, because that's it's just
Speaker 3: survival totally. You know, like maybe if I make them laugh,
Speaker 3: they won't put me in a locker because I fit
Speaker 3: into a locker.
Speaker 2: No, see, so what you're doing, you know what you're doing.
Speaker 2: You made it funny about being little, and then so
Speaker 2: they wouldn't put you in a locker.
Speaker 1: I might put you in a locker just because you
Speaker 1: said that.
Speaker 3: I did get in a locker.
Speaker 1: Did you really?
Speaker 3: I can fit. You don't need to put me in
Speaker 3: here now?
Speaker 1: Oh no, that makes me feel bad.
Speaker 3: Oh I was fine.
Speaker 1: Well, yeah, you're all right.
Speaker 2: I am actually be quite popular because you're funny and
Speaker 2: beautiful and that goes a long way in junior high school.
Speaker 1: Oh, pretty much.
Speaker 2: Everywhere. Really doesn't it?
Speaker 3: Well, it doesn't hurt. That's nice of you to say.
Speaker 3: I've never felt like I was the prettiest girl in
Speaker 3: the room for sure.
Speaker 2: Definitely not definitely the prettiest girl in this room. I
Speaker 2: really only that doesn't matter, That doesn't matter. I mean, look, also,
Speaker 2: you're very pretty, You're very pretty woman. Why why would
Speaker 2: you say that about yourself?
Speaker 4: No, I don't.
Speaker 3: I think you don't think like I don't think about
Speaker 3: it like that. I think I think I do just fine.
Speaker 1: Yeah you do.
Speaker 3: I think I do just fine. But I definitely Sometimes
Speaker 3: you meet someone, though, and you're like, oh damn, it's
Speaker 3: a different Like Angelina Jolie walked behind me at an
Speaker 3: awards show one time, and I was like, all right,
Speaker 3: I get it, I get it.
Speaker 1: You know.
Speaker 2: I once had to make a space for Jennifer Lopez
Speaker 2: to get past me at an awards ceremony, Like I
Speaker 2: was sitting in a seat and she passed by. She
Speaker 2: was married to Mark marc Antony. She was married to
Speaker 2: Mark Antony at the time, and not the Roman.
Speaker 3: I know you said Anthony, what was Anthony?
Speaker 2: Was that a difference Mark Anthony macar Anthony? I think
Speaker 2: so okay, it's a pronouncing. I'm not originally from Indonesia,
Speaker 2: so I don't my accent might be different.
Speaker 1: But anyway, I was at this award something.
Speaker 2: I was in my seat and you know that it
Speaker 2: was the old the Shrine auditorium, so it's like the
Speaker 2: old timey cinema seat. Yeah. Yeah, And I had to
Speaker 2: stand up, you know that kind of half stand up
Speaker 2: you do in the seat folds opposite, So I had
Speaker 2: to half stand up. And then Mark Anthony or Anthony
Speaker 2: came by first, and he's quite a little guy.
Speaker 1: And just kind of got through quite nicely.
Speaker 2: And then she can buy and she passed by right
Speaker 2: from my eyes.
Speaker 1: But yeah, no, I have played tennis.
Speaker 3: How'd you do?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 1: I always tried it once.
Speaker 2: I didn't care for him.
Speaker 3: You're very tall?
Speaker 1: Is that bad for tennis?
Speaker 3: No, it's great. I mean you would cover the net.
Speaker 2: So. Well, there's a Scottish guy i've heard of who's
Speaker 2: good at tennis.
Speaker 1: Who's that Andy Murray?
Speaker 3: His nameless Is he Scottish?
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's from Dunmblin.
Speaker 3: I stayed at his place at the krum Lix. What's
Speaker 3: the krumls Oh my gosh, it's beautiful what is that?
Speaker 1: Is that a place in Scotland?
Speaker 3: Well? Yeah, And so we stayed there and there was
Speaker 3: a couple of older couple. I liked the vacation where
Speaker 3: everyone is like sixty and up those are mind.
Speaker 2: You know, wherever I go there's an over sixty there
Speaker 2: because I'm now over sixty?
Speaker 1: Are you really sixty?
Speaker 3: Okay? You're dipping your toe in fifties? Sixties and in
Speaker 3: fifty I don't know.
Speaker 2: Sixty is the sixty and sixties? Always fucking ben? Yeah?
Speaker 3: Well I was vacationing with a bunch of people from
Speaker 3: the UK who were in their sixties.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's a different type of sixty, that's like.
Speaker 3: And this woman next to us was like, you know, Andy,
Speaker 3: Mary owns all of this. And I was like, oh
Speaker 3: really what Scotland?
Speaker 1: All right okay?
Speaker 3: And I said, well, it's a lovely castle and she
Speaker 3: went it's not a castle. I mean, it's a great house.
Speaker 2: What was the difference? A castle was a military installation?
Speaker 3: I guess, I said, Oh, I guess also the size.
Speaker 2: Well you stayed at my place. My place is a castle.
Speaker 3: Are we talking about it?
Speaker 2: Sure? What we can talk about it, just don't give
Speaker 2: out the address. Giant castle was near the moat Scotland.
Speaker 2: I mean, this could be fucking anywhere.
Speaker 3: Get on her road. And then right when you think
Speaker 3: you were lost, that's where your place.
Speaker 2: And that castle that Shoon Connery lives in and all
Speaker 2: the movies that he's in when they get to show
Speaker 2: that's my that's your castle.
Speaker 3: Your place is gorgeous, you guys, here's the thing place.
Speaker 2: It's a castle.
Speaker 1: Right.
Speaker 3: My family and I went and we stayed with you guys,
Speaker 3: and you were so gracious, and I here's the thing.
Speaker 3: We had never taken the kids to Europe before, and
Speaker 3: they all wanted to take a big suitcase.
Speaker 1: You guys traveled like I mean, it was like.
Speaker 3: So I was so embarrassed. I was so embarrassed. There
Speaker 3: were books we have. We each had a big suitcase
Speaker 3: and then a little suitcase. And then right as we
Speaker 3: get there, you say, great, you're on the ninety third
Speaker 3: floor something ninety steps. It was ninety three steps. Ninety
Speaker 3: three steps we counted and I was like what and
Speaker 3: you're like, yeah, I.
Speaker 2: Feel like I helped you carry the bags today.
Speaker 3: I felt so bad.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I had COVID then too. I never told
Speaker 2: you shut up.
Speaker 3: But you know what we know who did know.
Speaker 1: A lot of people got COVID, but we had that party.
Speaker 3: Party was a little bit of a super spread of a.
Speaker 2: Super spreader event. We thought there was going to be
Speaker 2: no COVID and then there was quite a bit of it.
Speaker 3: You took so many precautions. And then my favorite thing
Speaker 3: was after the first night, the first night, the next
Speaker 3: morning breakfast, were walking out and I just see this
Speaker 3: one person who we both know, and they're like a
Speaker 3: field away waving at me, and I was like, where are.
Speaker 2: We going and they're like, well, yeah, we're laving. We
Speaker 2: just tested positive for COVID and they and they laughed,
Speaker 2: and we were all stuck there, like, well, I guess
Speaker 2: we'll have the anyway.
Speaker 3: And then you're like, you said to me, don't tell him.
Speaker 1: For legal reasons, that's not true.
Speaker 3: But I did, and I was like okay, And you
Speaker 3: were like did he hug you?
Speaker 1: And I was like yes, and.
Speaker 3: It was like yeah, You're like did he breathe on
Speaker 3: you or calls on you? And I was like he
Speaker 3: laughed really hard in my face.
Speaker 2: Oh Jesus, But I didn't never heard from him since,
Speaker 2: not a stop, not.
Speaker 1: A fucking peep.
Speaker 2: Maybe he died. He did not, Oh, you have him
Speaker 2: all right. I called you, made sure you were all right,
Speaker 2: and called me. I didn't get COVID at that part either,
Speaker 2: then did We didn't get it from him? A lot
Speaker 2: of people, like six people. You know, my doctor sitting there,
Speaker 2: a doctor.
Speaker 3: Your doctor, your doctor's wife.
Speaker 2: Yeah, beautiful people, beautiful people both over sixty.
Speaker 3: Yes, honestybe maybe a fair walked along your river. Do
Speaker 3: you know he has a river, you guys, it's not
Speaker 3: the whole river, just a couple, just a couple of miles,
Speaker 3: just as far as you can see.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know.
Speaker 3: Yeah, But anyway, I live a block from the freeway.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, but but you're doing fine.
Speaker 2: And like the thing is house a block from the
Speaker 2: freeway where you live a bit the same as a
Speaker 2: castle in a river?
Speaker 3: Oh my god. The whole time I was there, he
Speaker 3: was trying to unload his other castle on me.
Speaker 1: Yeah, don't tell everyone. I'll get to castles. People can't relate.
Speaker 3: Lean over to me at dinner. Really seriously serious, you
Speaker 3: can buy it.
Speaker 1: You make me sound like a dick. Maybe I have
Speaker 1: a dick. I don't know. But here's the thing. My
Speaker 1: doctor and his wife with that.
Speaker 2: I won't say the name because of the you know,
Speaker 2: hippocratic ghoth, but the it's a reach around hippocratic growth.
Speaker 2: I don't I don't want to go there, nobody anyway. Look,
Speaker 2: what I'm saying is that.
Speaker 3: It's not a phrase you choose reach around. I'm going
Speaker 3: to go grocery shop and I just got to reach
Speaker 3: around the paper towels. It's a reach around. Excuse me, ma'am,
Speaker 3: can you step aside? I need to reach around?
Speaker 2: No, I didn't mean it like that. I mean what
Speaker 2: I'm saying. It's a reverse That's what I mean. It's
Speaker 2: a reverse YCWTH. Anyway, so they're there reverse reach around
Speaker 2: and they which is just guess. I guess a reverse
Speaker 2: reach around would just be a reach because then you're
Speaker 2: not anyway. Look here's the thing he found out and well,
Speaker 2: I said to them, Look, some of these tested positive
Speaker 2: for COVID. I've never seen two old people move that
Speaker 2: fast in my fucking life. They were like, boom out
Speaker 2: the door.
Speaker 1: I was like, where'd you go? And I was like wow.
Speaker 2: It was almost like it was like the you know,
Speaker 2: the Harry Porter thing where he just like disappeared up
Speaker 2: the fireplace.
Speaker 1: It was like, wow, they were gone.
Speaker 3: I know. There was a thinning out the next night.
Speaker 3: There was some empty seats.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there was some empty sees because the COVID had
Speaker 2: made its presence known. And I never got it. Megan
Speaker 2: got it, my kids both got it, and I didn't
Speaker 2: get I didn't get it to a month later.
Speaker 3: We never got it.
Speaker 1: No, you never got to ever.
Speaker 3: Never. Well, we got the og COVID.
Speaker 2: Right, Okay, when you can get it from like not
Speaker 2: cleaning your groceries or having enough, yeah, yeah, that was it.
Speaker 3: I didn't wipe down my grocery bag.
Speaker 1: Yeah, let's how you get it.
Speaker 2: What I was going to say was I didn't get
Speaker 2: COVID at the party last summer when you were at
Speaker 2: my house. Yeah, but a month later I went to
Speaker 2: Dublin to celebrity name that tune. You know. It's a
Speaker 2: fucking kind of showbiz life. I live right right right, it's.
Speaker 3: Just side hustle right well, side scratched.
Speaker 1: Right, and I go, I go irish COVID. COVID. It's
Speaker 1: fucking like it's.
Speaker 2: The worst, and it gets right in there and you
Speaker 2: get sweaty and your lucky charms fall off it's fucking
Speaker 2: It was awful. And you never go to a talk,
Speaker 2: will you. I got og, yeah, but you didn't get long.
Speaker 3: I had no symptoms. I didn't run fever. I was
Speaker 3: a little tired, but whatever, you know, I have three kids.
Speaker 3: I just figured it tired. And then I was cutting
Speaker 3: a lemon and I couldn't smell it. Oh, and the
Speaker 3: kids and my husband had COVID. We were isolating and
Speaker 3: doing the whole thing. And I was making dinner and
Speaker 3: I cut this womon in half and I couldn't smell it.
Speaker 3: Then I licked it and I couldn't taste it, and
Speaker 3: I just yelled to them, all come out.
Speaker 1: Everybody's got it.
Speaker 3: Yeah I don't.
Speaker 2: I mean we tried isolating then that you see my
Speaker 2: house this place as you can isolate your house. Yeah,
Speaker 2: And everybody got it sent me and I had to
Speaker 2: make sandwiches and stuff. It was a nightmare.
Speaker 3: You made sandwiches, yeah, I know.
Speaker 2: Everybody says that, like you didn't. It's not dead.
Speaker 1: I make sandwiches and tea and shit.
Speaker 3: My favorite. One of my favorite things of being at
Speaker 3: your castle was I couldn't find like where my kids
Speaker 3: were because we were in this one part of the tower,
Speaker 3: and then the tower you walk down steps and then
Speaker 3: they're little like different floors shoot off the tower.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a castle.
Speaker 3: It's a castle. Yeah, oh my god, you know what,
Speaker 3: Just relax, relax. It's the castle.
Speaker 1: So it's it's got a spiral staircase.
Speaker 3: With rooms, I know, and like people were tortured in
Speaker 3: the fourteen hundred or something. But anyway, so I'm like,
Speaker 3: it's like seven in the morning, and I told my
Speaker 3: daughter I would check in on her when I woke up.
Speaker 3: So I'm going I'm in pajamas, my hair is like
Speaker 3: you know whatever, I'm going down into when my slippers
Speaker 3: and I get to this one floor and I turn
Speaker 3: and I see a shadowy figure step out in his
Speaker 3: pajamas and it's you. Yes.
Speaker 2: Oh.
Speaker 3: And we looked at each other and you had like BedHead,
Speaker 3: that's right, and I was like and I and we
Speaker 3: just went like this and then I and I said kids,
Speaker 3: and you pointed that way, that's right, And then I
Speaker 3: found them.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they were.
Speaker 2: They were all kind of all the kids kind of
Speaker 2: gravitated to one room. I think for ghost reasons. It
Speaker 2: was like they thought if they were all in the
Speaker 2: one room, that the ghosts couldn't get them, which is
Speaker 2: likely because I don't think there are any ghosts in
Speaker 2: that castle. Those ghosts in the other castle, it's so
Speaker 2: fucking haunted you can't even be in it.
Speaker 1: But this one is fine.
Speaker 3: This one's totally fine.
Speaker 2: You know it's fine. Now, did you go for a
Speaker 2: walk down by the river and stuff? Did you play
Speaker 2: tennis on the tennis court?
Speaker 3: I never found the tennis court tennis court, I think, now, yeah,
Speaker 3: how can you keep it dry? It just rains all
Speaker 3: the time.
Speaker 2: It rains in Scotland all the time, hence the castle
Speaker 2: feasible priced castle.
Speaker 1: It's like it's fucking underwater most of the time.
Speaker 3: We walked all over. It was so beautiful and so
Speaker 3: much fun.
Speaker 1: You had a whole vacation in Scotland. Then last summer
Speaker 1: you were.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we went to London first and then we went
Speaker 3: to Scotland. I just love Scotland. I mean I could
Speaker 3: hang my hat there for sure.
Speaker 1: I could sell you a castle.
Speaker 3: Please tell me you've sold it.
Speaker 2: Actually, what happened there was a huge storm and it
Speaker 2: got damaged and we got into this huge insurance claim
Speaker 2: for it. It's an awful mess. So I'm having a
Speaker 2: great time with it. I remember I used to you know,
Speaker 2: Pierce Brosnan, if you ever run a Pierce Brosnan in
Speaker 2: your show business life.
Speaker 3: I mean one time I was at a Golden Globes
Speaker 3: after party, the HBO after party, and I was dancing
Speaker 3: my ass off with a few friends. It was like
Speaker 3: it was I don't know, early seasons of the office,
Speaker 3: where every time he got invited to a party, you
Speaker 3: were like, you got and there was free food and
Speaker 3: free drinks, and we were so excited. And he was
Speaker 3: sort of standing on the edge of the dance floor
Speaker 3: and sort of started to dance a little bit in
Speaker 3: the corner, and my friend was like, holy shit, pur
Speaker 3: dancing behind you.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, your friend doesn't vent. Trilloq was dumby.
Speaker 1: Oh my god.
Speaker 3: She started to be very cool, and then I just
Speaker 3: was like wow, And you know, did you dance with him?
Speaker 3: I danced near him.
Speaker 2: Okay, that's that currents Anyway, the reason why I brought
Speaker 2: him up I used to live near him and the
Speaker 2: in Malibu. I used to see him on the beach
Speaker 2: and every day I saw him, he'd be complaining about
Speaker 2: because I like Peerce and I've known him for a while,
Speaker 2: and every day I saw him would say, fucking house,
Speaker 2: fucking malabum, it's falling out of the water. Yet he
Speaker 2: got into a huge problem with apparently there's a big
Speaker 2: wobbly bit of water there called the ocean, and they
Speaker 2: can really fuck up your house.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and he got he got.
Speaker 3: That I had a house like hanging over it or something.
Speaker 2: He is the best party though. You should make friends
Speaker 2: with him. Him and his wife Gilly had the best parties.
Speaker 2: I met Barbara streisand at their.
Speaker 3: House stop it, I did, Yeah, did you make small
Speaker 3: talk with her?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 3: What do you say?
Speaker 1: I was like, what I said was you were great
Speaker 1: and what's up? Doc?
Speaker 3: No, you did not?
Speaker 1: I did? It was wrong with that? Really? Yeah said
Speaker 1: you were great and what's up?
Speaker 2: Doc?
Speaker 3: Would she say?
Speaker 1: She said that was? That was a little time ago.
Speaker 4: I went, well, it's the first movie I saw and
Speaker 4: I fell in love with her.
Speaker 2: Well, actually it wasn't the first movie. I didn't want
Speaker 2: to hurt feelings. The first movie I saw was Sound
Speaker 2: of Music. Julie Andrews was also there.
Speaker 3: Did you talk to her?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 3: I actually did you say? Did you use the same line?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Do you think they talked to each other.
Speaker 3: Yes, they hate you. Are you invited anymore?
Speaker 2: You know, I haven't seen it either one of them
Speaker 2: for a while, as you bring it up, But I
Speaker 2: don't think so. I think that Julie Andrews knew that
Speaker 2: it was the first movie I ever saw the music,
Speaker 2: and Barbara Streisen didn't care, right, so it was all right.
Speaker 2: But Barbara, they were both lovely.
Speaker 3: I can't, I can't.
Speaker 1: I give it frightened Barbara Streis, Yeah.
Speaker 3: I would be too scared. I really like shut down
Speaker 3: in like parties like that. I can't.
Speaker 1: Why you're a big star, you get the biggest podcast in.
Speaker 3: The world, so funny, but I can't. I really can't.
Speaker 3: I'll just like go hang out in the kitchen like
Speaker 3: with like you know, I mean, you.
Speaker 1: Don't have to do that. Like people are like.
Speaker 3: Guys, no, no, no, no, they don't they don't. And
Speaker 3: I'm okay with it. I'm totally okay with it. But
Speaker 3: I I just am like, my my resting self is
Speaker 3: just really dorky, and then in those moments, I just
Speaker 3: the dorkiness heightens.
Speaker 2: This is an official in invitation to the Fancy Rascal
Speaker 2: stand up Show. I Craig Ferguson will be performing this
Speaker 2: summer and fall in your region. You can buy tickets
Speaker 2: and check out the full list of dates at the
Speaker 2: Craig Ferguson Show dot Com slash tour.
Speaker 1: See you there or not.
Speaker 2: When the Office was done, right, you guys were done
Speaker 2: running at the same time I was done in late night,
Speaker 2: I think when you are maybe.
Speaker 1: A little before no, I think you're right that time.
Speaker 2: Did you find the adjustment period difficult after coming off
Speaker 2: a big hit show like that?
Speaker 3: I did a pilot immediately right away with Roberygull played
Speaker 3: his wife for Fox. So I went right from the
Speaker 3: Office right to this pilot. That was a really crazy
Speaker 3: experience because the way I got the Office was I auditioned.
Speaker 3: I auditioned for the role of Pam Okay, but they
Speaker 3: said I was too feisty.
Speaker 1: I think that's a fair note.
Speaker 3: Actually, there's a moment where Michael fake fires Pam in
Speaker 3: front of Ryan the tempt to impress him, and Pam
Speaker 3: kind of starts to cry and she calls him a jerk.
Speaker 3: And then I was in front of all the producers,
Speaker 3: big room full of people, and when it got to
Speaker 3: that moment, I think I just became very southern and
Speaker 3: I went jerk like that and they all started to laugh,
Speaker 3: and I remember thinking, I think they're supposed to be
Speaker 3: laughing right here. And then four months later they called
Speaker 3: me back and said, hey, we've got this sort of
Speaker 3: prickly lady in accounting, you know, and that's pretty And
Speaker 3: then I just went and I read with the director
Speaker 3: and I got it. So doing the pilot for Fox
Speaker 3: right after the office was so like studio and networking
Speaker 3: and corporate.
Speaker 2: There was a lot of executives, a lot of executive
Speaker 2: love of them.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and they all.
Speaker 2: These people last six fucking months and then they go, yeah,
Speaker 2: that's why I'm never nice to them. Though. It doesn't matter, It.
Speaker 3: Doesn't matter, do you have to do what my mom says,
Speaker 3: be politely bored?
Speaker 1: I fucking nailed it.
Speaker 2: I have a hard time because there I think see
Speaker 2: amongst people in show business, like actors and writers and
Speaker 2: directions stuff, I don't encounter much phoniness at all. I
Speaker 2: don't think people are really phonny.
Speaker 1: But executives, Oh, yeah, there's the worst. You know.
Speaker 2: Well, we do a podcast, Oh we just want to
Speaker 2: film it. Wait a minute, that's a TV show. Yeah,
Speaker 2: you gotta be careful with those asking.
Speaker 3: You have three cameras.
Speaker 1: What I thought they were like fancy microphones.
Speaker 3: I don't know, I know.
Speaker 1: But so you did the pilot. But did the pilot
Speaker 1: get picked up?
Speaker 2: No? It didn't that freak you out?
Speaker 1: Did you think?
Speaker 2: Oh? Oh?
Speaker 3: I really didn't at the time. But then I did
Speaker 3: another pilot and it didn't go.
Speaker 1: Okay, that PMS with pilots, Yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And then I did a TV show and I
Speaker 3: filmed in Vancouver and I had the best time.
Speaker 1: Oh, remind me of what that show was, because I
Speaker 1: remember it was called Haters.
Speaker 3: Back Off and I had to dye my hair like
Speaker 3: I had dark dark dark hair and round hair.
Speaker 2: And I saw you that time, and you were filming.
Speaker 2: You were flying up and down and you hated it,
Speaker 2: and I hated.
Speaker 3: Having to go back and forth, back and forth. I
Speaker 3: loved the job and I love the people. But then
Speaker 3: that went two years and didn't go and then all
Speaker 3: of a sudden, I was like, well, shit, now I'm hustling.
Speaker 3: I'm hustling. I'm doing like, yeah, you know, a movie
Speaker 3: in Atlanta, and then I'm going to Orlando. Then I'm
Speaker 3: going to New Orleans.
Speaker 2: And I was just taking did just call that career though?
Speaker 2: I mean, that's not it's not nothing to panic.
Speaker 3: About it, right, right, But it wasn't consistent and we
Speaker 3: had had that for a long time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know that you get used to it.
Speaker 3: Then I sort of really started to do the hustle,
Speaker 3: and then that's when Jenna and I started the podcast.
Speaker 2: Then the podcast, I think is very interesting because the
Speaker 2: podcast that you do is a podcast where you take
Speaker 2: an episode of the Office and rewatch it.
Speaker 1: And talk about what it was like to make it.
Speaker 2: Is that right?
Speaker 1: Is that fair?
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a it's a rewatch podcast. We started at
Speaker 3: the very beginning. We're going in order each week and
Speaker 3: we reach out to the cast and the writers and
Speaker 3: the directors and then the crew members and people call
Speaker 3: in or you know, it's so easy now you can
Speaker 3: zoom in or you can just send in an udio
Speaker 3: clip and like tell the story. And people have been
Speaker 3: super supportive and it's been really great. And then I
Speaker 3: think the fans of the show were there to hear
Speaker 3: behind the scenes. But then we also have people who
Speaker 3: are staying for Jenna and I and our friendship, and
Speaker 3: that's really funny.
Speaker 2: Very funny. Both of you are very funny, very clever woman,
Speaker 2: so entertaining. Don you got you guys are really besty
Speaker 2: friends as well.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we're really besty friends. Which is great too because
Speaker 3: we can in the moment, I can say like, oh,
Speaker 3: you're going to want to retell that.
Speaker 2: Oh that we have that ability to be like, oh,
Speaker 2: you know why I do a podcast on my own?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't you.
Speaker 2: Do too too many bridges?
Speaker 3: You do too? Barbara streistand she loves you, She loves you.
Speaker 3: That's your podcast, Craig and.
Speaker 2: Barbara, Craig and Barbara. I think, you know what, to
Speaker 2: be fair, I think it might be Barbara and Craig.
Speaker 2: Maybe maybe she's got a career behind. I feel maybe
Speaker 2: it's just Barb though. That's her podcast personality. Barb or
Speaker 2: Barb Craig, just Barb and who who's on the show today?
Speaker 1: Barbie? I get to say.
Speaker 3: That, Oh yeah, your side couch.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm Ed McMahon or Jeff Peterson.
Speaker 3: You did I did your robot one time.
Speaker 1: When Josh was on the Robot who was the robots?
Speaker 2: Yeah, inside Juice, he was touring he you know what
Speaker 2: he was doing, what.
Speaker 1: He was doing an ad campaign in Britain.
Speaker 2: What for he got this ad campaign for this like
Speaker 2: big giant things. My friend Josh and he he got
Speaker 2: this big ad campaign where he was doing the voice
Speaker 2: of Morgan Freeman because he can do an amazing Morgan
Speaker 2: Freeman voice.
Speaker 3: So when they can't get Morgan Freeman, they hire your friend. Yeah,
Speaker 3: shut the front door.
Speaker 1: It's show business.
Speaker 3: I want a gig like that.
Speaker 2: Well, who can you sound like? Can you do Morgan Freeman? No,
Speaker 2: I don't do that.
Speaker 1: When that's taken. What about Barbara Schuisen? Can you do
Speaker 1: Barbara Schreisen?
Speaker 3: No, but I think I can do Martha Stewart.
Speaker 1: Let's hear it.
Speaker 3: Okay. One time I went to a food expo and
Speaker 3: Martha was there, Right.
Speaker 1: This is not you're doing it yet. No, okay, yes, correct,
Speaker 1: this is maybe Artha. I just didn't know how good
Speaker 1: it was.
Speaker 3: I was that food expo. She's Southern, so she was
Speaker 3: showing off her instapot. She had an insta pot.
Speaker 1: Is that to do with like Snoop Dogg and the
Speaker 1: like their friendship?
Speaker 3: No? No, it's a pot you put things in and
Speaker 3: you cook it instantly. Yeah.
Speaker 1: No, get high.
Speaker 3: That's a whole other show they're doing. I'm sure, so okay.
Speaker 3: So she had her instapot and she was going to
Speaker 3: give a display of it, and she also had these
Speaker 3: puffer sweater vests. Okay, so it's like, imagine a puffy vest,
Speaker 3: but then imagine you put sleeves on it, so it's
Speaker 3: like a T shirt but it zips up, but it's
Speaker 3: a puffer vest. I don't even know what's happening with it,
Speaker 3: but everyone, her whole staff was wearing them.
Speaker 1: I love the sound of this, okay.
Speaker 3: And she said so, and she took questions from the audience, right,
Speaker 3: and so this woman was like, Martha, I just need
Speaker 3: a really simple dish. My family is coming for Thanksgiving
Speaker 3: and I just need a simple maybe an appetizer. And
Speaker 3: I have a very small apartment. And Martha was like, well,
Speaker 3: you know, I love I absolutely love gruyere, So if
Speaker 3: you could get some greye and oh, I feed my
Speaker 3: chickens blueberries, and because I love this certain color of blue,
Speaker 3: and when they eat the blueberries, their eggs are blue.
Speaker 3: And I am right now wearing my puffer vest and navy.
Speaker 3: I wanted the blue, but they didn't have it. I
Speaker 3: wanted my instapot in the blue they didn't have it.
Speaker 2: Wow, this is terrifying. First of all, if that's really
Speaker 2: what she said, that's terrifying.
Speaker 3: Huh.
Speaker 2: And also what's terrifying is how close that that was,
Speaker 2: Like Martha Stewart was in the room, and she also
Speaker 2: says things.
Speaker 3: She also says things like this, you are very humorous.
Speaker 3: Did you find you humorous?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: That she is one of those I think these people
Speaker 2: that you know that you're very funny. Like that's the
Speaker 2: thing with executives, like in Hollywood, they'll say you are hilarious, hilarious,
Speaker 2: I loved you, or your show is hilarious and you're hilarious,
Speaker 2: and you have.
Speaker 3: A hilarious accent. Are you from outside of the country?
Speaker 3: You should work that.
Speaker 2: Did you get a lot when you first came here
Speaker 2: to get work? Did you get a lot of Southern jobs?
Speaker 2: Was it a lottle like Larry the Cable Guy's wife
Speaker 2: and stuff?
Speaker 3: I mean yes, yeah, I mean I did a voiceover
Speaker 3: on King of the Hill where they go to the
Speaker 3: super the megalomart and one of my lines was, wait,
Speaker 3: don't sail super squarters anymore on account of they're dangerous.
Speaker 3: And then I was also a dispatch lady in the
Speaker 3: police office. It was like all units, Code nine, all units.
Speaker 1: That's very good. It's like you picked up that Southern
Speaker 1: stuff very quick.
Speaker 3: I auditioned for this pilot. I wanted it so badly
Speaker 3: one year and it was set in a small town
Speaker 3: in Texas. That was like, I got this and it's
Speaker 3: like the no nonsense like Judge in the small town.
Speaker 3: I'm like, yes, this is me. And so I went
Speaker 3: in and I played it exactly like one of the
Speaker 3: people I know in my small town from home. And
Speaker 3: the writer loved it, and the network because I went
Speaker 3: all the way to the network read they said, she's
Speaker 3: making fun of Texas and that's going to make people uncomfortable.
Speaker 3: I was like, what I am from Texas. I am
Speaker 3: playing a person from my hometown. This is exactly who
Speaker 3: they are.
Speaker 1: I have that story as well.
Speaker 2: When I first go at the town, the movie Braveheart
Speaker 2: had just come.
Speaker 3: Out and they were an audition for Braveheart.
Speaker 2: I did didn't get it enough.
Speaker 1: I auditioned for Brave Heart.
Speaker 2: Everybody in Scotland edition for Brave I didn't get it,
Speaker 2: and I've kind of forceded the resentment about that ever since.
Speaker 1: But I'm going to let that go.
Speaker 3: I think you should hold on to it.
Speaker 1: I'll keep going.
Speaker 2: But when I got here, I had come out and
Speaker 2: you know what the worst thing was lots of people
Speaker 2: who got it.
Speaker 1: You're like, guys, it's fucking hopeless.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and he's not Scotted.
Speaker 2: And he's not Scottish. Well, the guy who got my
Speaker 2: job wasn't Scottish. The job that I was down to
Speaker 2: the last two and the guy who got the job
Speaker 2: was Irish, and to be fair, he was playing Irish.
Speaker 2: So is all right?
Speaker 3: I see the guy that was like, that's my island.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that was the job.
Speaker 2: And I was right there and I met mel Gibson
Speaker 2: a couple of times and everything. I didn't get it.
Speaker 2: It's like I was crushed because I could really use
Speaker 2: that job at the time. Now I don't know, but
Speaker 2: then I was like, I could really have done right right.
Speaker 2: Actually now I would still love that job. I don't
Speaker 2: know why I'm trying to say that wouldn't I would.
Speaker 2: That's not the story. The story is this. The story
Speaker 2: is I got to LA because I was so angry
Speaker 2: at not getting the job. Brave heart, and I'm going
Speaker 2: to move to America and get a different job. Yeah,
Speaker 2: that's one of the reasons. And I came here and
Speaker 2: I couldn't get a job, and I auditioned. They wanted
Speaker 2: a Scottish actor to read the audio book series of
Speaker 2: the Brave Heart spin off books.
Speaker 3: Did you do it?
Speaker 1: I auditioned for it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and the executive said, we just don't fail your accent.
Speaker 2: It is authentic. I'm like, I'm doing a fucking Scottish press.
Speaker 2: You've ever met your fucking life now. If he had
Speaker 2: heard me say that, he would have said, oh, yeah,
Speaker 2: maybe that is authentic.
Speaker 1: But I didn't get the job. I wasn't Scottish enough.
Speaker 3: So you auditioned twice for Braveheart.
Speaker 1: Both times didn't get it.
Speaker 3: Well, I think you're okay to hold on to that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm seething.
Speaker 2: Yeah, when I think of it, maybe if I do
Speaker 2: the Netflix reboot, because it must be a bit ready for.
Speaker 3: A musical, yeah or something.
Speaker 2: Yes, But anyway, I didn't get Brave Heart twice, is
Speaker 2: what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: I don't know why I brought that up.
Speaker 2: I brought it out because I seethed with resentment about it.
Speaker 3: Oh and we were also talking about You asked me
Speaker 3: if i'd ever done a role where I got to
Speaker 3: use my accent.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, well, but in the office you kind of
Speaker 1: used your accent. I did not a little bit. You
Speaker 1: could hear it a little bit, I.
Speaker 3: Know, well, like three o'clock in the afternoon, you can
Speaker 3: always hear it. I'd get a little tired, and like
Speaker 3: after lunch one time, I had to say, you send
Speaker 3: us all these filthy emails. And I can't say a
Speaker 3: vowel with it like an eye before an L, or
Speaker 3: like any vowel in front of an L. I'm just screwed.
Speaker 3: So I and I was also tired, and I wasn't focusing,
Speaker 3: and so I said, you send us all these failthy emails.
Speaker 3: And John Krasinski was like, hello, Texas has a rive.
Speaker 3: And I also had to say a hand tilled field.
Speaker 3: Hand to say, And I kept saying hand healed field,
Speaker 3: hand tail fild, hand tiled field, and then they just
Speaker 3: the writer came over and said, just say hand plowed.
Speaker 1: Oh nice. Yeah, well, I think it's interesting.
Speaker 2: It seems to me, and maybe I'm wrong, but it
Speaker 2: seems to me that the cost of the office.
Speaker 1: Got along, we really did. Yeah, I knew that you
Speaker 1: remained friends we have a group text. We still text amazing. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you don't have realized.
Speaker 3: I think we're really fortunate. I think also the show,
Speaker 3: I mean, Steve Crill set the tone. He was no
Speaker 3: ego and so he's a very nice, nice, nice person,
Speaker 3: and he was so up for like whoever could sell
Speaker 3: the joke the best, Like it didn't have to be
Speaker 3: number one on the call sheet to sell the joke.
Speaker 3: Like if we had a line that wasn't working and
Speaker 3: then Philis said it and it killed the room, Phyllis
Speaker 3: should say it. And it was a real collaborative like
Speaker 3: creative effort that way, right.
Speaker 2: So that's really that also is very rare. Yeah, did
Speaker 2: you ever have any interaction with Ricky Jervase.
Speaker 3: Yes, So he came to set and he was there
Speaker 3: one day at lunch and I was going through the
Speaker 3: lunch line and the ad came out to me, assistant
Speaker 3: director and said, Angela, you're talking head is first up
Speaker 3: after lunch, And I said, oh okay. And one of
Speaker 3: our producers were like, oh, Ricky's going to be here
Speaker 3: for that. You can watch that, and I was like,
Speaker 3: oh great, And then Ricky looked at me and said,
Speaker 3: don't worry. I don't tisk too loudly.
Speaker 2: He is a very interesting guy, Ricky Jervase, I think
Speaker 2: because he's nothing like people think he is. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: he's very he's shy.
Speaker 3: Yeah, he was very nice.
Speaker 1: And are you shy? Very nice? You know what he
Speaker 1: reminds me of. Did you ever meet Don Rickles?
Speaker 3: No, but I would have loved Don was on my
Speaker 3: shoe Yeah, yeah, he was great on your show. He
Speaker 3: was great on talk shows.
Speaker 1: Yeah he was. He was fantastic.
Speaker 2: But he was nothing like that, you know, he was
Speaker 2: nothing like this kind of a sair. Yeah. He was very,
Speaker 2: very shy and quiet and kind of afraid of his wife.
Speaker 1: And Ricky's kind.
Speaker 2: Of the same.
Speaker 3: My favorite thing is when Ricky post photos of Jane
Speaker 3: like alone, and he'll say Jane and her friends like
Speaker 3: she's like alone alone in a field somewhere. She's very
Speaker 3: nice too. We showed the same birthday.
Speaker 1: Really, is you her? And Hitler?
Speaker 2: No? No?
Speaker 3: And Ricky? Oh you?
Speaker 1: And Ricky?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 1: What's your birthday?
Speaker 2: June? That's not Hiller's birthday. It's not He was April sometime.
Speaker 2: I think April twenty seventh. I think same as my sister.
Speaker 3: Is he really?
Speaker 1: I mean was he well personality, Yeah, a little bit. No, no,
Speaker 1: no completely.
Speaker 3: I met some of your family at my at my
Speaker 3: house at the COVID party.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I don't call it the cool although it was. I
Speaker 1: guess I like a third of the.
Speaker 2: People got no.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know who it was. I mean, we know,
Speaker 1: we know it was. We know America right from America.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but it was bad because there were some old
Speaker 2: Scottish people there who got them. They made it, they
Speaker 2: all made it. They were they got American going like
Speaker 2: it's nothing like that Scottish COVID.
Speaker 1: American COVID is easiast like decaff. It was all right.
Speaker 2: So after you left my house in Scotland, Yeah, then
Speaker 2: you went to Andy Murray's house.
Speaker 3: No, okay, Murray's another time, another time, another time you
Speaker 3: were in Scotland.
Speaker 2: You didn't tell me, you said it and mur.
Speaker 3: I went to Scotland for my honeymoon and I came
Speaker 3: and I before I went on my honeymoon, I asked you.
Speaker 3: I said, I'm going to Scotland. You said when I
Speaker 3: said March, and you said, oh, it's a horrible time
Speaker 3: to go to Scotland.
Speaker 1: You go.
Speaker 3: Actually it doesn't matter.
Speaker 1: No, I live there and it's lovely. But it does rain.
Speaker 3: No, no, no, you just meant yeah it was going to
Speaker 3: rain all the time, all the time. It's rain and
Speaker 3: but we had the best time. Yeah, we didn't care.
Speaker 3: But we went after your house. We went, oh god,
Speaker 3: this is like we did the classic American thing where
Speaker 3: the only place is kind.
Speaker 2: Of like the Griswolds. When you turned up, I got
Speaker 2: to say it. I know, I know that you had
Speaker 2: check pants out and everything. It's nebulous.
Speaker 1: Well you somebody did. It may have been me, I
Speaker 1: don't know. Somebody was wearing take pat.
Speaker 3: We we left your house. We loaded up in this giant,
Speaker 3: biggest car we could find in Scotland to fit our
Speaker 3: whole family. We had this driver, Gary, who was so great.
Speaker 3: I loved him. And we get in and we found
Speaker 3: the only place I think you can find that has
Speaker 3: an indoor swimming pool with a slide.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I didn't know they had one of those.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because our kids really they were like can we swim?
Speaker 3: We're like in Scotland.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: My husband's like, good lord, but he found a place.
Speaker 3: They loved it. They loved it.
Speaker 1: That's good.
Speaker 2: What was the place do you remember?
Speaker 3: Cambridge House?
Speaker 2: Okay, that's ed.
Speaker 1: I want to go because I see their indoor swimming pool.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so you can do the indoor pool, you can
Speaker 3: do the slide. The kids got me up on the slide.
Speaker 3: Those were a little bit embarrassing, and they were like, Mom,
Speaker 3: go on your knees. We're going on our knees. It's
Speaker 3: really fun. It's like a corkscrew slide.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 3: They're like, but go on your knees. Because I went
Speaker 3: on my butt. That was already embarrassing because your feet
Speaker 3: fly up at the end, and the end it ends
Speaker 3: near the hot tub, so everyone in the hot tubs,
Speaker 3: just the mysteries.
Speaker 2: Zone, those sophisticated, sophistic of Long Island general types from
Speaker 2: Scotland to the home.
Speaker 3: Exactly. So the kids were go down on your knees.
Speaker 3: I was like, all right, fine, So I went on
Speaker 3: my knees and when I did, I got the whistle.
Speaker 3: I got the whistle, and they shamed you. The shame
Speaker 3: lifeguard like and this isn't enclosed, it's not a big space.
Speaker 3: She whistles and she goes, sorry, you can't do your knees.
Speaker 3: And I was like, and I turned to my kids
Speaker 3: and they're like we've done it like three times.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but the difference is, of course your kids are children.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, and I'm fifty year old woman.
Speaker 1: And so you should know.
Speaker 2: Bear. Let me ask you about your driver without mentioning
Speaker 2: any names.
Speaker 3: Oh I loved him.
Speaker 2: No, I know. I'm just saying whenever I've had a
Speaker 2: driver in Scotland, if you have for something like that,
Speaker 2: or American friends who found a driver in Scotland, they
Speaker 2: always get kind of a tour, like the driver'll see
Speaker 2: this is where Bonny Prince gently found his hat after
Speaker 2: the Battle of Nuke and all.
Speaker 1: Did you get all that?
Speaker 3: No, we didn't. He was so great, Anna, he.
Speaker 1: So died great. Didn't tell you any of the stuff. No,
Speaker 1: he was great.
Speaker 3: Because we've had that guy, you know, that guy like please,
Speaker 3: I love you?
Speaker 1: But were you shut up for he's just making it
Speaker 1: up anyway.
Speaker 3: I know he's just And the Americans are like, oh.
Speaker 1: I did not believe that. Would you like some gum?
Speaker 1: Would you like?
Speaker 2: I love your English?
Speaker 3: Do you like a place where we could go on
Speaker 3: a slide?
Speaker 2: Do you have a Do you have an indoor slide
Speaker 2: where I can go on my knees? I really feel
Speaker 2: the needs a shop of Vagina.
Speaker 3: I did though. I came down that slide so fast.
Speaker 3: It was way faster than I thought I was going
Speaker 3: to go, and things got twisted.
Speaker 2: Oh I'm so sorry. And also that you were shamed
Speaker 2: by a Scottish lifeguard, because yeah, all Scottish civic order
Speaker 2: is based on shame.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, yeah it's oh yea. I look at you
Speaker 4: and down there in your knees. That's awful, bad a
Speaker 4: bad pass. And I could hear your accent sometimes when
Speaker 4: you have in the office there, I said.
Speaker 1: Shame based I like it.
Speaker 3: I can't do I can't do a Scottish accent. I
Speaker 3: mean I I mean, I really one or two words
Speaker 3: here or there, and then then it veers off really badly.
Speaker 2: I think you have a musical ear and you could
Speaker 2: pick it up. See if you can. You can speak Indonesian.
Speaker 2: Do you ever think you know what I'm going to
Speaker 2: take the family. I'm just going to live in Indonesia.
Speaker 3: Scotland. Yes, you would do that, Scotland. I would live
Speaker 3: in Scotland.
Speaker 1: I would I heard, all right?
Speaker 2: All right? With all of its leaky problems, No, no,
Speaker 2: not anymore, They'll be fixed.
Speaker 1: I mean, the ghosts are still there. The leaks are done.
Speaker 3: You had people partying in that castle that was the
Speaker 3: party house.
Speaker 2: It was this overspilled castle. Yeah, yeah, it was bad.
Speaker 3: We didn't go over there.
Speaker 1: I didn't get it. Well.
Speaker 2: We had an extra place where they went to because
Speaker 2: there were some of the people liked to get twisted
Speaker 2: on drugs and alcohol, which is fine, but I don't
Speaker 2: do that, and I didn't like it in the house.
Speaker 2: And we had kids in the house and stuff, and
Speaker 2: so if you want to be up late, you're in
Speaker 2: the family house.
Speaker 3: Can I tell you one story. One morning I went
Speaker 3: down and next to where you guys were so nice,
Speaker 3: you had breakfast set up. There was a little room
Speaker 3: where there was a coffee and tea area. Yeah, the
Speaker 3: wee kitchen, Yeah, the wee kitchen. And there was a
Speaker 3: lady in there sort of setting up to me. Her
Speaker 3: name again Charlie, Yeah Sureley Okay. I said to my
Speaker 3: husband Josh, who was horrible with names, I said, he
Speaker 3: was in there getting coffee, and I said, what's the
Speaker 3: lady's name? He goes? I think it's like she said
Speaker 3: something like Chilah.
Speaker 1: That's what I said, And I.
Speaker 3: Said, are you sure he goes? I don't know. I
Speaker 3: don't know, and I said, oh my god. So I
Speaker 3: went in there and I said good morning, Charlatte. She
Speaker 3: looked at me like I was crazy crazy. And then
Speaker 3: she had said some tea bags and I said, what's
Speaker 3: your darkest tea bag? And then she looked at me
Speaker 3: like what And then I said, can I have two?
Speaker 3: And I had a little tiny cup and I put
Speaker 3: two tea bags in there and she said, I mean
Speaker 3: I can't do the accident all.
Speaker 2: No.
Speaker 3: She was like, if I drank God, i'd have the Jennis.
Speaker 1: I understood it. I understood what you did. If I
Speaker 1: took that, I'd have.
Speaker 3: Said it so fast and together. And I was like try.
Speaker 3: And we'd had a little bit of wine the night
Speaker 3: before you did. There was dancing. There was Scottish dancing.
Speaker 3: It was so fun.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's Scotland. Yeah, gotta have the dance. Yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah. So I always thought really bad because I was like,
Speaker 3: I just called that lady, tyl.
Speaker 2: Are you coming back to Scotland this year for another vacation?
Speaker 1: Because if you do, have got a surprise.
Speaker 3: I would love to. Why don't you because we've planned
Speaker 3: a tropical vacation.
Speaker 2: Well that the kids voted, So where are you going
Speaker 2: to go there? If you're going to go to the tropics,
Speaker 2: are you gonna like the Marshall Islands?
Speaker 3: I think we're going to go to French Polynesia.
Speaker 1: Now, what's the difference between French Polynesia and regular Polynesia?
Speaker 1: All right? So I don't know either. I think French Polynesia.
Speaker 3: They am I saying it wrong?
Speaker 2: No, no thing. So I don't know.
Speaker 1: I'm no expert.
Speaker 2: I mean we might both be saying it wrong, in
Speaker 2: which case you're in trouble.
Speaker 3: Ask me again, where are you going on vacation? Well,
Speaker 3: the kids want to go somewhere tropical.
Speaker 1: Right, are you going to French Polynesia?
Speaker 3: Why not? Is there a slide? Can I fly off
Speaker 3: and show my business to everyone?
Speaker 1: No, you don't want to do that there.
Speaker 3: Well, I get the whistle.
Speaker 1: You'll get the whistle if you could play the whistle.
Speaker 2: The French Polynesian culture, I don't think they have that
Speaker 2: shame based system.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know what it's like over there.
Speaker 2: Where is it?
Speaker 1: What's the name of the name of big town over there?
Speaker 3: Okay, so you have Tahiti.
Speaker 1: Oh, that's where all the Australians go.
Speaker 3: Oh well, that'll be real fun. Go down slot.
Speaker 2: Do you know what happens when Australians go down slides?
Speaker 2: You have other little baby Australians and their tummies. What Yeah,
Speaker 2: they're marsupials, all Australians.
Speaker 4: That's what they don't tell you. All Australians have little
Speaker 4: baby Australians.
Speaker 3: How does it go when you tour there?
Speaker 1: Would I when I talk about that? I don't.
Speaker 2: I never brought it up when I was there because
Speaker 2: I think they might be wore a little embarrassed about it.
Speaker 2: But they all have They're like Russian dolls. There's an
Speaker 2: Australian and then there's another Australian and it goes all
Speaker 2: the way down and the smallest baby Australian is called Joey.
Speaker 2: That's true. That's baby kangaroos.
Speaker 3: Joey Kangaroo.
Speaker 1: Kangaroo is called Joey.
Speaker 2: I know this, And that was why Joey was named
Speaker 2: Joey and Friends, because the character originally was going to
Speaker 2: be Australian.
Speaker 3: Stop it. How do you know this great TV focalore?
Speaker 1: I made it up, but it does sound good.
Speaker 3: Why did I believe that? Because it probably would have
Speaker 3: gone and told someone that.
Speaker 2: Well, well, go ahead, I mean it might be true.
Speaker 2: Chandler was originally going to be called Chandler because he
Speaker 2: was a dealer in supplies and equipment for ships and
Speaker 2: ships and you.
Speaker 3: Know, funny thing. Monica was going to be called Monica
Speaker 3: because she's.
Speaker 2: A pirate because she had one eye eye Mona Cole Monica,
Speaker 2: get it, Monica? And what was the other one called
Speaker 2: Rachebe Phoebe and Rachel. Yeah, did you have the Rachel
Speaker 2: hair when you were at that age?
Speaker 3: I did not, but you.
Speaker 2: Have great hair. Had the Rachel had Rachel Kenna did. Actually,
Speaker 2: there's a no photograph of me in the Drag Carry Show.
Speaker 2: I'm like, wow, I've got the Rachel and it was
Speaker 2: running at the same time.
Speaker 3: You did have floppy hair for a bit.
Speaker 1: I did for a little bit. I had the Rachel.
Speaker 1: I mean it was the same time.
Speaker 3: I remember seeing you on the Drew Carey show, well
Speaker 3: before I met you, and I was like, that just
Speaker 3: looked like a lot of fun.
Speaker 2: It was a lot of fun. It was a lot
Speaker 2: of fun. But people used to call us, you know,
Speaker 2: they said that they wouldn't be able to say this now,
Speaker 2: but they said we were the ugly friends.
Speaker 3: No, they did it.
Speaker 1: That's what they said about us.
Speaker 2: Ah, And I was like, well, I don't know about
Speaker 2: everybody else, but I'm not loving with us. I'm gorgeous
Speaker 2: and some of those friends are creaking, you know, But
Speaker 2: that's what it is. You go have self esteem.
Speaker 3: Well, I had my rolodex is going with things I
Speaker 3: want to say, but I'm not saying.
Speaker 1: I know, what do you think now?
Speaker 2: Because comedy has changed quite about there's quite a lot
Speaker 2: there's new rules really about comedy now, which I'm okay
Speaker 2: with for the most part. But I wonder, like the
Speaker 2: Drew Carey Show, I think that would have to be
Speaker 2: well rewritten. I don't know, I can't I can't think,
Speaker 2: but I think there's probably be a lot of jokes
Speaker 2: wouldn't be allowed.
Speaker 3: Well, I certainly think that most of entertainment is a
Speaker 3: time stamp of when it was made, you know, and
Speaker 3: we should we should look back with reflection. It should
Speaker 3: you know, bump us here or there, because hopefully we're
Speaker 3: all evolving and the way we relate to one another's evolving.
Speaker 1: Or even if it's not. Fashions change.
Speaker 2: Yeah, So sometimes when you see people wearing you know,
Speaker 2: stonewashed denim. Nobody wears that anymore. You shouldn't really do that,
Speaker 2: but some people just won't let it go.
Speaker 3: No, some people want to hold on.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I don't. I don't think you should. I'm
Speaker 2: quite happy with with comedy moving on without me.
Speaker 1: No, No, it's fine.
Speaker 3: No, you had great bits. Look at all the bets
Speaker 3: you had today.
Speaker 2: You had all the bets we had to cut.
Speaker 1: You really were your bets.
Speaker 2: Actually, when I think about it, like you've had to
Speaker 2: cut out all of your bets.
Speaker 3: You had some bits.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well but wait, you turned really fast. It's easy
Speaker 2: to see how you've been successful in Hollywood. You were like,
Speaker 2: first of all, you had great bets, and then I said,
Speaker 2: well you had you had some bad bets, and then
Speaker 2: you had your bets are the worst, like you were
Speaker 2: Boom one eight Netflix.
Speaker 3: I think recording this, what's the whole.
Speaker 1: Point, you know what?
Speaker 2: I was the direct in a film and my mom
Speaker 2: came to it and there was like it was a
Speaker 2: big set update and there was tons of stuff.
Speaker 1: And she went, oh, this is just very impressive. If
Speaker 1: you should take some photographs.
Speaker 2: I went, the whole fucking reason anyone's here is to
Speaker 2: take photographs for filming it. She meant no, but you know, photographs.
Speaker 2: I was like, yeah, all right, we'll take some photographs.
Speaker 2: But we never did. And you know what, that movie
Speaker 2: was a failure because there weren't enough photographs.
Speaker 1: And did you ever directed the film or did you
Speaker 1: direct the office at all?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 3: No, no, I didn't. I didn't.
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 3: I didn't want to take that on.
Speaker 1: I think you'd be great at that.
Speaker 3: I like to write, so that's the stuff that's like
Speaker 3: what I like to do. I've sold five shows. They
Speaker 3: haven't gone, but I always love to write about.
Speaker 2: At ten in one ratio anyway, so you have to
Speaker 2: do another five five before it.
Speaker 3: Now, someday I'm going to write something for us, or
Speaker 3: we're going to do something that would make me so happy.
Speaker 1: I would love to do that.
Speaker 2: I think it should be a romantic comedy, okay, okay,
Speaker 2: And it's set in a castle in Scottland, maybe where
Speaker 2: you're American and I'm not.
Speaker 3: And you're a local hire.
Speaker 2: Well I could be maybe like the cleaning person, and
Speaker 2: you could think I'm older than I am, but I'm
Speaker 2: not as old as that. I just look old because
Speaker 2: you're Scottish. Scottish and I'm tired. And then you find out,
Speaker 2: you know, I'm young enough for you to consider dating. Yeah,
Speaker 2: that would be it.
Speaker 3: And I'm a chandler. You've come there for business.
Speaker 2: You've come there to sell goods and services to boats
Speaker 2: and ships. Yeah, and I've got one eye and.
Speaker 1: You got one eye that sells it. Oh my god.
Speaker 1: I feel like we were on episode twelve already.
Speaker 3: I can't wait for like the television critic to be like,
Speaker 3: what was your choice having him have one eye? What
Speaker 3: was that? What was your motivation?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: I don't think anyone asks these questions anymore. I don't
Speaker 2: think there are show business journalists anymore. It's either you
Speaker 2: suck or I stand for this.
Speaker 1: That's it.
Speaker 3: Like or dislike.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's you know, ones or zeros. It's all the algorithm.
Speaker 2: You either you know, you either owe for it, you're
Speaker 2: all against it. That's it. There's no see And most
Speaker 2: of my life I've That's where I've lived, the sweet
Speaker 2: spot between I hate them and I love it. Man,
Speaker 2: it doesn't it doesn't bother me that much. And now
Speaker 2: May is gone, Mays gone, there's no there's no place
Speaker 2: for me to be.
Speaker 3: I think you found a home and I think it's
Speaker 3: right here.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Next thing it has cameras.
Speaker 3: There, uh huh yeah, and you're leaky ace.
Speaker 1: Event I'll go back to my castle.
Speaker 2: This place's phone and this.
Speaker 3: You've done a great job with this.
Speaker 2: I have to be honest with you. When I saw this,
Speaker 2: I thought, whose idea? And then I thought it might
Speaker 2: be somebody who's in this room this idea. So then
Speaker 2: I didn't say in about because I thought you didn't
Speaker 2: want to hurt anyone's feeling.
Speaker 3: Maybe it's to hide that, like Mike packed diary thing here.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, but you're because you're filming a show.
Speaker 1: I thought it was like radio and podcast means radio.
Speaker 3: Right, No, And then you've got some place SATs.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: In case we have lunch, we might have supper. Lunch,
Speaker 2: supper supper now here. Let me ask you this supper
Speaker 2: is when Quinn quen quin quen Do you have supper?
Speaker 3: We have supper? This is accent from nowhere. No, don't know. Okay,
Speaker 3: we have supper, you know around five thirty.
Speaker 2: See, that's not supper. Supper is a snack before bedtime.
Speaker 2: In Scotland.
Speaker 3: You usually have explains a lot of my conversations are
Speaker 3: they Its a lot because you know, Scottish people like
Speaker 3: to have a pie and some potatoes for a snack
Speaker 3: before they go to sleep.
Speaker 2: Mmm, supper, supper and then breakfast, second breakfast.
Speaker 3: You had sucker breakfast. Oh yeah, because I came down
Speaker 3: to have breakfast and you were there and we had
Speaker 3: breakfast together. It was early Yeah. Then I went for
Speaker 3: a walk and I came back and there was a
Speaker 3: whole other wave of people having breakfast. Yeah, and you
Speaker 3: had breakfast.
Speaker 2: It's second breakfast. I'm gonna tell you you never have
Speaker 2: a second breakfast. It's in the larger the rings, in
Speaker 2: the hobbit and everything. You're allowed to have it. It's literary.
Speaker 3: You audition for that too.
Speaker 2: No, I did not. No.
Speaker 1: No, at that point I gave up.
Speaker 2: I knew that I knew that the costume drama thing
Speaker 2: is the world.
Speaker 3: I do a period piece.
Speaker 2: I don't look like someone who's from another time. Apparently
Speaker 2: I think i'd be great, And.
Speaker 3: I don't think I do either. You know what, I
Speaker 3: don't think I can sell it because I think even
Speaker 3: if you put me like in like some kind of
Speaker 3: like Bridgerton like outfit.
Speaker 1: I'd just be like yeah. I think that's it too.
Speaker 2: I think if you you can dress me up like
Speaker 2: someone from Shakespeare's time, I'll just look like an idiot
Speaker 2: from medieval times or something. It's like, oh, look it's
Speaker 2: the dorman from medieval times. Yeah, that's how I talk.
Speaker 3: That's your act, that's your acting voice. This might explain
Speaker 3: some things.
Speaker 1: That's brave, heart, brave, that's my all. They may take
Speaker 1: our lives, but I won't take our freedom. Kids, No
Speaker 1: fucking way.
Speaker 3: You kill that king.
Speaker 1: You come up here trying to fucking take our fucking way.
Speaker 3: If you take our women, now come for you. I
Speaker 3: can't you. We just got the E.
Speaker 1: What does he mean explicit?
Speaker 3: We got the E?
Speaker 1: We have an E has the great podcast?
Speaker 3: You got an E?
Speaker 1: I think I got all the time.
Speaker 2: It will tie in with my own school reports. I'm fine,
Speaker 2: and it's like this is below F.
Speaker 3: It's right in the Yeah, that's.
Speaker 1: What is F.
Speaker 2: And then just leave already, like go on work in
Speaker 2: a store. Were you good at school? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I bet you were. Actually I like sassy and
Speaker 1: clever and stuff.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I liked it. I volunteered and I raise my hand.
Speaker 3: I wrote my English teacher a letter after when I
Speaker 3: was in college, I titled it captain O my captain.
Speaker 1: Wow.
Speaker 3: Such a dork. Such a dork you are.
Speaker 2: It's amazing to me that you and I are friends,
Speaker 2: because I feel like we're very different but yet the same.
Speaker 2: I don't know what it is.
Speaker 3: I don't know. I mean, I feel like there's a
Speaker 3: time we would have met and like we would have
Speaker 3: you know.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, been crazy. Oh yeah, I think so. Yeah,
Speaker 1: yeah for sure.
Speaker 3: But but you probably wouldn't have hung out with me
Speaker 3: like like a lot, because I probably would have worked
Speaker 3: down on you too much.
Speaker 2: I don't know about that. I mean I think I
Speaker 2: would have probably. You know, I had a habit when
Speaker 2: I was a young man of spontaneously falling asleep outside. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I was kind of drunk. Oh yeah, you know, so
Speaker 2: I would like fall asleep and pee myself. Oh no, yeah,
Speaker 2: it's a thing. Yeah, it's called he had his alcoholism.
Speaker 1: You ever heard of it?
Speaker 2: I have. It's fabulous, you know, I mean in a
Speaker 2: way and then in other ways. Not you never into
Speaker 2: trouble with then like that.
Speaker 3: No, But I mean I love a glass of Samniel blanc.
Speaker 1: Yeah I do.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's not the same.
Speaker 3: That's like, have some glasses of wine, get little chatty.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, I've done that too, yeah yeah. And then
Speaker 2: that's like the first two three minutes, and then it's
Speaker 2: sky and get a little stabby.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and then the pissies.
Speaker 1: You had to go to the pissies.
Speaker 2: I was trying to make it sound more butch and stabby,
Speaker 2: but then you took it to the pissies, the peepee time.
Speaker 1: That's the that was.
Speaker 2: Actually, I think the reason I got sober was not
Speaker 2: because of the bad stuff like fights and stuff, but
Speaker 2: the kind of.
Speaker 1: Embarrassing like a pied myself, myself.
Speaker 2: Beating myself once too often. That's it, all right, Well
Speaker 2: we have to go now. I think that's enough.
Speaker 3: We've got to We've got enough excited.
Speaker 1: Yeah for E live that podcast you do with your
Speaker 1: and gin E.
Speaker 3: For E, that's exactly what I was thinking. I was
Speaker 3: literally thinking, elephant, Yeah, this is why we should have,
Speaker 3: you know, hung out.
Speaker 2: Had babies together, because we both have blame improv yeah,
Speaker 2: we have terrible improve Our babies would have been able
Speaker 2: to say yes and yes.
Speaker 1: That would have been their first words.
Speaker 3: Craig, I love you, I love you too, I love
Speaker 3: seeing you, I love hanging out.
Speaker 1: I love hanging out with you. Come back to Scotland
Speaker 1: when you're done with French Polynesia.
Speaker 3: I know I want to. I would come all the time.
Speaker 3: I would buy your crappy other castle.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, you know, I have to think about it.
Speaker 2: I'll give you mates rates.
Speaker 3: That's what you told me. You told me you'd give
Speaker 3: me a good deal on it.
Speaker 2: Well, i'll give you mates rates. I'll sell you a cost,
Speaker 2: no you know, thirteenth century cost. They'll be updated for it,
Speaker 2: right right, So like forty bucks fifty bucks.
Speaker 3: That's a really good deal. Oh no, all right, good bye.
Speaker 2: Some of the fo