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Speaker 1: Hello the Internet, and welcome to this episode of I

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Speaker 1: Love Burritos at four AM, Parties that Never and Dogs

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Speaker 1: That Love Cats and Trance that was courtesy of Katie

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Speaker 1: Didn't one of the great and trans tweens. What a

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Speaker 1: horrible moment in time. I remember I was in love

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Speaker 1: with like the Miller Light person at the time, whoever

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Speaker 1: that was like this redheaded person. I was like, oh man,

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Speaker 1: the Miller the Miller Light like uh on TV or

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Speaker 1: the Miller Light like rep who they sent to local Bark.

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Speaker 1: Don't make me answer that Jack. I'd like to think

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Speaker 1: that she was hired by a corporate to be the

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Speaker 1: national sports person or could have been someone just given

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Speaker 1: away Miller Light themed Marty Grabb's at the student sweet Well,

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Speaker 1: speaking of national sports person. Uh No, it is National

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Speaker 1: Horny Day and we were contacted by sex to uh

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Speaker 1: talk it up. Get people, it's sex to talk. We're

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Speaker 1: we're the officially. This is a branded officially, a branded

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Speaker 1: piece of content for National Horny Day. And what makes

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Speaker 1: you hornier than me? Talking like this? Yeah? Anna, Just

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Speaker 1: a note from the producing team. They they would like

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Speaker 1: you guys to be a little bit hornier for this segment.

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Speaker 1: This is as horny as I get. Man, here comes

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Speaker 1: the horn trams, got it. I don't know, we're turning

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Speaker 1: into a morning Zoo show. It is a morning Zoo show.

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Speaker 1: I don't know that. Apparently this is the April seventeen

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Speaker 1: that or the sixteen is horny Day. There's a lot

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Speaker 1: of I guess, debate over if it's the sixteenth or

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Speaker 1: the seventeen, but it is an easter like the spring

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Speaker 1: celebration of fertility or whatever. Yeah, I don't know. I mean,

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Speaker 1: this is just about being horny, you know. So you know,

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Speaker 1: I don't know what it means like everything on Twitter,

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Speaker 1: just you know, if he just posting some real horny

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Speaker 1: content on Maine. Yeah, now that is who they should

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Speaker 1: have contacted. Yeah, I'm eas going to call him right now,

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Speaker 1: like what what is this holiday exactly? You gotta get

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Speaker 1: these five picks off? Mm hmm yeah, National Morning, get

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Speaker 1: out there, Uh horn it up, you know. Yeah, I

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Speaker 1: don't know if you guys with Concett Anglo Saxon is

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Speaker 1: trending dude, why? I actually don't know. As fucking Marjorie

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Speaker 1: Taylor Green and these other fucking racist ass hats have

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Speaker 1: started this party. Uh that is like they're america first

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Speaker 1: caucus and it is truly even for America. It's just

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Speaker 1: like I thought the mask. I didn't know there was

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Speaker 1: another mask you could then take off to reveal how

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Speaker 1: natives racist are. They somehow reached under their facial skin

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Speaker 1: and ripped that off to reveal David Duke mask off

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Speaker 1: to reveal this fully faceless nativists. So the ship that's

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Speaker 1: like in there sort of like, you know, I don't

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Speaker 1: know what it is. Like they're on their website talking

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Speaker 1: about their new caucus h quote common respect for uniquely

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Speaker 1: Anglo Saxon political traditions and a return to architectural style.

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Speaker 1: That quote befits the progeny of European architecture. It's his

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Speaker 1: fancy Nazi talk is all this year. Yeah, I mean

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Speaker 1: it's the most in your face. That's I mean, like,

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Speaker 1: I guess it's the next level would be like and

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Speaker 1: we gotta get rid of all the black and brown,

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Speaker 1: the non white people. Like that's really there's not a

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Speaker 1: degree after this that Isn't that because you're just trying

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Speaker 1: to be like, oh yeah, we love it. They said

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Speaker 1: under the immigration section, quote America is a nation with

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Speaker 1: a border and a culture strengthened by a common respect

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Speaker 1: for uniquely Anglo sex and political traditions. And this isn't

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Speaker 1: an alternative to the Republican Party. This is just like

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Speaker 1: the Freedom Caucus within. Uh, that's cool that the Republicans

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Speaker 1: have gone. Like I remember when I was first learning

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Speaker 1: about the world that you know, you would hear about

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Speaker 1: these Nazi parties in Europe that are like, oh, they're

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Speaker 1: like openly Nazis, and that was something that you know,

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Speaker 1: America didn't officially have in the halls of power. But uh,

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Speaker 1: turns out now we do. Yeah, I mean, it's and

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Speaker 1: it goes on just all kinds of this weird, you know,

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Speaker 1: not weird, just straight up racist rhetoric of like, you know,

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Speaker 1: like a a full nations like assimilation is necessary. So

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Speaker 1: it's a some colonizer racist bullshit. Um. But you know, honestly,

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Speaker 1: I don't know what to say because there this week,

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Speaker 1: I would would we live in a country where people

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Speaker 1: vote for this ship because that's truly They're they're all

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Speaker 1: in on that. So the struggle continues. Helen McRory is trending.

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Speaker 1: She is the actress from Peaky Blinders. She played the

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Speaker 1: the aunt from Peaky Blinders. I believe she played Draco

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Speaker 1: Malfoy's mom and Harry Potter recently passed away from cancer.

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Speaker 1: I didn't really, yeah, I didn't realize she was with

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Speaker 1: Damian Lewis, who I know. I know because I have

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Speaker 1: World War two brain and I'm like banda brothers Damian Lewis.

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Speaker 1: But man, his the post that he he put out

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Speaker 1: the statement in her passing, I was very It was

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Speaker 1: heart heart wrenching to have to like read from someone

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Speaker 1: whose partner has just passed away. But yeah, she was apparently,

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Speaker 1: you know, as you said, she died peacefly at home,

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Speaker 1: surrounded by a wave of love from friends and family.

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Speaker 1: She dies, She died as she lived fearlessly. God, we

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Speaker 1: love her and know how lucky we are to have

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Speaker 1: had her in our lives. She blazed so brightly. Go now,

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Speaker 1: little one into the air and thank you. But yeah,

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Speaker 1: definitely a lot of people are very familiar with the work.

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Speaker 1: So yeah, awful, awful awful. You know, yeah, you hear

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Speaker 1: about cancer, so fucked up. So speaking of awful, awful, awful, Uh,

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Speaker 1: FedEx as trending because there was another mass shooting at

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Speaker 1: a FedEx facility near the Indianapolis Airport. There's another Biden

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Speaker 1: call for gun reform that will presumably go nowhere. Um,

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Speaker 1: but what did you say, Hey, hey, come on, come on,

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Speaker 1: come on guys. Anyway, who am I president? Gun violent?

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Speaker 1: It's an epidemic in America, but we should not accept it.

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Speaker 1: We must act so Um, strong words can get your

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Speaker 1: head out. You're the president. Don't ask these other people

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Speaker 1: to have take so you can hide behind them because

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Speaker 1: you don't want to be the one who comes out

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Speaker 1: here be saying I'm the president of the United States

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Speaker 1: and this is what I believe the direction that the

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Speaker 1: country needs to go in as president of the United States.

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Speaker 1: So I'm like, oh my god, let me just pass

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Speaker 1: past the hot tato, hot potato of responsibility to other

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Speaker 1: people who have no interest to do anything. Is anybody

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Speaker 1: gonna do something like don't make me come down there, guys,

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Speaker 1: or what you can do? Nothing? Again, Like that's why

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Speaker 1: it's so it's only gonna the ship, they say, is

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Speaker 1: it's only gonna sound more and more hollow and hollow

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Speaker 1: and meaningless and more offensive. And it's just gonna just

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Speaker 1: say you don't give a fuck, at least I don't.

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Speaker 1: People don't have to have any sense of optimism about it.

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Speaker 1: They can just be right in their cynicism of how,

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Speaker 1: you know, a little dedication there is to keep the

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Speaker 1: people of this country side. Could he like, how far

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Speaker 1: can an executive order go? Could he just like do

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Speaker 1: a blanket band like what? What? Because the most stringent

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Speaker 1: possible gun control that I can imagine would immediately like

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Speaker 1: we would see a drop in uh crime and suicide

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Speaker 1: and homicide like and it would be hard to argue

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Speaker 1: against that. Like just the fact that politicians aren't willing

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Speaker 1: to even have do that experiment like is pretty yeah.

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Speaker 1: I mean you know, because it's it's like anything you

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Speaker 1: have any EO and then it'll be people sue and

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Speaker 1: it's it only lasts until it's canceled, which means the

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Speaker 1: next innitry I can just sucking outband everything. So it's

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Speaker 1: it's like a while it is a band aid fix

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Speaker 1: in that, like it can be completely ripped off by

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Speaker 1: whoever is next in line. It's you know, uh why

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Speaker 1: it's like yeah, then that's why we need the laws

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Speaker 1: to be changed and ratified. But this is just what

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Speaker 1: the state of our political leadership is. The problems are

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Speaker 1: so apparent but it's just a it's this crop of

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Speaker 1: politicians who aren't who are just absolutely incapable of altering

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Speaker 1: um this shitty bed that they've slept in for decades, quick,

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Speaker 1: quick one that we didn't have on the dock. But uh,

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Speaker 1: Kyle Rittenhouse is trending because apparently cops have been donating

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Speaker 1: money to his defense fund and saying, quote, you've done

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Speaker 1: nothing wrong. Thank you for your courage. Keep your head up.

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Speaker 1: Every rank and file police officer supports you. Don't be

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Speaker 1: discouraged by actions of the political class of law enforcement leadership.

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Speaker 1: Yeah there was from Sergeant William Kelly, a nineteen year

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Speaker 1: veteran of the Norfolk Police Department. Uh. Yeah, they're a

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Speaker 1: white supremosis gang like prison gig. And it's like, where

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Speaker 1: the funk are these other cops at who you know?

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Speaker 1: You think are people who have a fucking soul in them?

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Speaker 1: Where the funk are y'all? Because it's making it real

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Speaker 1: easy for us to have this. I don't I really

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Speaker 1: don't like to believe in absolutes, just philosophically speaking, because

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Speaker 1: I don't believe in absolute anything. But what is happening?

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Speaker 1: What are y'all doing? How are you how are you

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Speaker 1: even a cop? And what do you do? Because from

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Speaker 1: what I'm seeing, it's all y'all. It doesn't even matter

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Speaker 1: who the funk you are. We're either you don't say

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Speaker 1: ship and you don't do nothing about it, or on

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Speaker 1: the other end of it, you can end up like

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Speaker 1: Chris Dorner, who you try and fucking raise a point,

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Speaker 1: And then there there's a mechanism in place to just

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Speaker 1: be like even we're not we're not we're not interested

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Speaker 1: in any kind of accountability within the department. T rex

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Speaker 1: is trending it. It has been revealed that they think

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Speaker 1: there were two point five billions two point five billion

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Speaker 1: of these motherfucking t rex is. Wait, what like over

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Speaker 1: the over the over the span of the existence of

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Speaker 1: t rexes? Okay, where are these skeletons at? Thank you?

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Speaker 1: I mean, that's what it really is like when you

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Speaker 1: think about like s I I read some account of

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Speaker 1: like how a how a fossil gets made, and it's

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Speaker 1: like such a shockingly like specific set of things need

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Speaker 1: to happen, like you need to fall into yeah, fall

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Speaker 1: into like a boiling mud lava lake, and then you know,

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Speaker 1: like it's just all these weird things. So like, we

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Speaker 1: just have such scant evidence of like what actually went

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Speaker 1: on before we started writing ship Down. And I've said

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Speaker 1: this before, Jack, I just don't think it's right to

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Speaker 1: thwart the will of Christ and his father got almighty

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Speaker 1: by acknowledging the presence of these beasts, and to say

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Speaker 1: that they were somehow part of his plan, um, it

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Speaker 1: just makes you know they were definitely put there to faith. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and from what I was taught, I believe Jesus would

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Speaker 1: ride these majestic beasts um across the land delivering his

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Speaker 1: message of salvation. So hell yeah, man, that's one of

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Speaker 1: the first places that you and I have talked about

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Speaker 1: this off, Mike, But one of the first places we're

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Speaker 1: going to visit is the Creation Museum. And yeah, just

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Speaker 1: weep for finally being in the presence of the truth.

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Speaker 1: Thank you. Grimes is trending finally because she got a

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Speaker 1: sick back piece. Bro, Dude, that's just been I don't

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Speaker 1: know what she calls him, alion scars. She just made

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Speaker 1: it look like her back got fucked up. It looks

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Speaker 1: like old Antebellum, you know, reconstruction photos of freed slaves

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Speaker 1: who have you know, whipping laceration scars on their backs.

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Speaker 1: But because they're because they're symmetrical and done by a

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Speaker 1: fucking algorithm, we can call them alien scars. Uh uh,

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Speaker 1: it's a back tattoo. I don't know, Like this ship

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Speaker 1: looks ridiculous. I okay, yeah, exactly, Like I don't know,

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Speaker 1: like what it's just part. I don't know that there's

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Speaker 1: such a fucking weird group of people like that. You're like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: let this computer thing decide what this is gonna look

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Speaker 1: like on my body. You know what, though, your body

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Speaker 1: your problem. That's what I always say, you know, so

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Speaker 1: you gotta deal with it. Your choice. Anyways, those are

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Speaker 1: the things that are trending here at the end of

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Speaker 1: this fun week. Uh. We are back on Monday with

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Speaker 1: a whole as episode of the show, and then until then,

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Speaker 1: be kind to yourselves, be kind to each other, wear

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Speaker 1: a mask, don't do nothing about white supremacy. I don't

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Speaker 1: talk to him. Bye bye,