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Speaker 1: All right, this is a great place to do this, Steve.

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Speaker 1: Before today's letter, the Strawberry Letter, I thought I was

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Speaker 1: dating him, not his mama. We're going to get to that.

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Speaker 1: We need to encourage our listeners are Steve Harvey Nation,

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Speaker 1: especially our Tennessee voters, to get to the polls to day. Okay.

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Speaker 1: If you are not registered, or if you have any

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Speaker 1: questions about the November third election, go to when We

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Speaker 1: All Vote dot org. We have now eighty nine days.

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Speaker 1: Eighty nine days left until November third. Is going fast,

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Speaker 1: isn't it? All right? General election is November third, So

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Speaker 1: get to the polls. Yes, we want to encourage you,

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Speaker 1: all right, and it is time now for today's Strawberry Letter.

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Speaker 1: If you need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting,

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Speaker 1: and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM

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Speaker 1: dot com and just click submit Strawberry Letter. Okay, we

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Speaker 1: could be reading your letter live on the air, just

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Speaker 1: like we're gonna read this one right here, right now,

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Speaker 1: bug alapin, hold on tight, We got it for you here.

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Speaker 1: It is Scrawberry letta. All right, thank you, nephews. Subject,

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Speaker 1: I thought I was dating him, not his mama. Dear

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Speaker 1: Stephen Shirley. I'm a twenty nine year old woman and

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Speaker 1: I was in a relationship with a thirty one year

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Speaker 1: old man. We both have degrees and promising careers. He

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Speaker 1: came from a solid middle class family and I was

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Speaker 1: raised by a single mother with very humble beginnings. We

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Speaker 1: have been dating for two years, and my boyfriend's mother

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Speaker 1: does not like me. He told his mom he always

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Speaker 1: tried to hook him up. He told me that his

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Speaker 1: mom had always tried to hook him up with successful

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Speaker 1: women in town, but he was never interested. I tried

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Speaker 1: to overlook her, and I was pleasant whenever I was

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Speaker 1: around her. I can tell when she's saying nasty things

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Speaker 1: about me on the phone because my boyfriend has a

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Speaker 1: nervous laugh, and then he would rush her off the phone.

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Speaker 1: He recently moved back home with his parents to save

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Speaker 1: money to buy a house, so I have to visit

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Speaker 1: him there. He has asked me to make myself comfortable

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Speaker 1: when i'm there, but it's hard. His mom has said

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Speaker 1: to me, it's not your fault. You were not exposed

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Speaker 1: to certain things growing up, and she has called me

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Speaker 1: ghetto a few times and tried to laugh it off.

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Speaker 1: But the most hurtful thing was a text exchange my

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Speaker 1: boyfriend had with his mom. She texted him that he

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Speaker 1: could do better and be with a classy woman. He

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Speaker 1: responded to her and said that she didn't need to

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Speaker 1: worry because I'd only be around for a season, not

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Speaker 1: a lifetime. I told him I checked his messages and

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Speaker 1: I broke up with him. He said he didn't mean it,

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Speaker 1: He only said that to end the conversation with his mom.

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Speaker 1: He made his mom called me to apologize, and I

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Speaker 1: ended up basically cursing her out. My boyfriend said there's

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Speaker 1: no way we could ever be together since I did that.

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Speaker 1: I don't see anything wrong with standing up for myself.

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Speaker 1: After all the stuff his mama has done to me,

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Speaker 1: has she won in the end? Well, Sis, I cannot

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Speaker 1: go with you on this one because you did say

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Speaker 1: you cursed his mom out right. Well, you can't do that.

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Speaker 1: I know she's disrespectful, I know all of that. The

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Speaker 1: fact that you didn't see anything wrong with it is

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Speaker 1: really a problem, and he's not going to forgive you

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Speaker 1: for that. And I'm all for you standing up for yourself,

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Speaker 1: don't get me wrong, but I just think you went

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Speaker 1: too far with the cursing out of the mom. I know,

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Speaker 1: I know, like I said, she's disrespectful to you. She's

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Speaker 1: completely out of line, calling you names, ghetto and all

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Speaker 1: that kind of stuff. But that is his mom. He's

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Speaker 1: supposed to check her when it comes to you. You

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Speaker 1: should direct your anger to him, not her. But then again,

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Speaker 1: he's obviously a mama's boy, right and he's not gonna

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Speaker 1: do it. That's why you need to leave him just

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Speaker 1: right where he is. A two years, haven't you had

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Speaker 1: enough of her and him? After two years, he doesn't

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Speaker 1: defend you, and when you do stand up for yourself,

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Speaker 1: then you know he can't see a future for you. Guys.

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Speaker 1: And let me tell you this, I think you have

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Speaker 1: been standing up for yourself quite well. You've been doing

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Speaker 1: it forever. So what, he was raised in a nice

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Speaker 1: middle class family. That's great, you know, lucky him. But

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Speaker 1: I say to you, take your eyes off them and

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Speaker 1: just look at your accomplishments for a second. You said

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Speaker 1: that you came from humble beginnings and a single mom,

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Speaker 1: and look at what you've accomplished. You finished college, you

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Speaker 1: have a promising career, you said. I say again, you've

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Speaker 1: done quite well for yourself. They should be congratulating you.

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Speaker 1: She should be welcoming you to the family, happy that

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Speaker 1: you're dating her son. They shouldn't be hating on you.

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Speaker 1: They definitely have this situation twisted, and you know you

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Speaker 1: may as well know it now. You see it, don't you.

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Speaker 1: Mama's Boy is not going to be able to get

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Speaker 1: past you cussing out his mom. So, I mean, I

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Speaker 1: don't see a future here because he's not gonna stand

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Speaker 1: up to his mom. And that's what you're gonna have

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Speaker 1: to need if you want to go any further in

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Speaker 1: this relationship with Mama's Boy. Doesn't look like it's going

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Speaker 1: to happen. Steve, good riddens. That's what you should be

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Speaker 1: saying to yourself right now. You found out just in

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Speaker 1: the nick of time what you were dealing with. Both

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Speaker 1: of you all got degrees, promising careers. He came from

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Speaker 1: solid middle ground. You had humble beginnings. We've been dating

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Speaker 1: two years. Your boyfriend mother don't like you. She's always

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Speaker 1: tried to hook him up with successful women, but he

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Speaker 1: was not interested. You always tried to overlook at you

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Speaker 1: with pleasant whenever you around him, she talked nasty about you.

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Speaker 1: He recently hit a part right here. This was a

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Speaker 1: letter turns for me. He recently moved back home with

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Speaker 1: his parents to save money to buy a house. That

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Speaker 1: rarely happens, because he moved back home yourself at thirty one. Okay,

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Speaker 1: to save money to buy a house. People buy a

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Speaker 1: house without moving back home all the time. So I

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Speaker 1: don't get this part. Man, That part right there sounds

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Speaker 1: real shaky to me. And when we come back, I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna agree with Shirley. A mama's boy, just a mama's boy. Man,

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Speaker 1: run now, girl, because this is he not fitting to

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Speaker 1: stop being no mama. He did already moved back home

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Speaker 1: at thirty one. How much more of a boy can

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Speaker 1: you be? All right, Steve, hang on right there. We'll

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Speaker 1: have part two of your response coming up to today's

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Speaker 1: Strawberry Letter at twenty three minutes after the hour of

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Speaker 1: the title. I thought I was dating him, not his mama.

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Speaker 1: We'll get back into it right after this. You're listening

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Speaker 1: to show, all right, Come on, Steve, let's recap today's

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Speaker 1: Strawberry letter. Uh subject, I thought I was dating him,

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Speaker 1: not his mama. Well you thought wrong. You're dating his mama.

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Speaker 1: He's a mama's boy. Both of y'all got degrees. He

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Speaker 1: middle class, You grew up humble. Here. The whole problem is,

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Speaker 1: Mama don't like you. Thank you. She thinks he could

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Speaker 1: have did better. She don't thank you it you've tried

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Speaker 1: to be nice to him. You overlook all the stuff

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Speaker 1: she talked to you, real nasty. Now, your boyfriend recently

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Speaker 1: moved back home with his parents to save money to

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Speaker 1: buy a house. Now, look, people move back home to

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Speaker 1: save money. I got that, not thirty one year old men.

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Speaker 1: Thirty one year old men don't go back home. I

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Speaker 1: just don't, man, unless you just out on luck. Now

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Speaker 1: he going back to save money. This is a mama's boy, man.

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry, you know. And then he asked you to

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Speaker 1: make yourself comfortable when you're over there years somebody else's house.

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Speaker 1: But it's hard. His mom said to you, it's not

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Speaker 1: your fault. You would not expose to certain things up.

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Speaker 1: She didn't called you get her a few times, tried

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Speaker 1: to laugh at home. But the hurtful thing for you

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Speaker 1: was a text exchange you saw between him and his mama.

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Speaker 1: She texts him that he could do better and be

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Speaker 1: with a classy woman. He responded to her and said

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Speaker 1: that she didn't need to worry because you'd only be

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Speaker 1: around for a season, not a lifetime. Then you told

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Speaker 1: the dude you checked his message, and I broke up

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Speaker 1: with him. He said he didn't mean it, He only

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Speaker 1: said that at the end of the conversation with his mom. Women,

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Speaker 1: hold up, Wow, if you want to end the conversation

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Speaker 1: with your mom, you hang on the phone. Just hang

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Speaker 1: down like mama, Mama, I got to go now. You

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Speaker 1: ain't got to text that back. He texts that because

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Speaker 1: he meant it. Now, did he have his mama call

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Speaker 1: you to apologize? Yeah, but you knew it was a

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Speaker 1: weak apology, so you cussed out. Now. I agree with Shirley,

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Speaker 1: that's the mistake you made. See see, you gotta stay

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Speaker 1: on the high side. But this was a great learning

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Speaker 1: experience because this traumatic moment exposed a couple of flaws

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Speaker 1: in the relationship. Because after you cuss his mama out,

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Speaker 1: but he wants you to forgive him for saying she

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Speaker 1: only for a season, she ain't gonna be with me

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Speaker 1: for a lifetime. He wants you to forgive that, But

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Speaker 1: he ain't gonna forgive you cussing his mama. Right, My

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Speaker 1: boyfriend said there was no way we could ever be

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Speaker 1: together since I did that. I don't see anything wrong

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Speaker 1: with standing up for myself. That's to get away. You

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Speaker 1: better believe that girl, that's to get away. Hold on

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Speaker 1: to that because that's gonna come in hand a few

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Speaker 1: more times in your life. Stand up for yourself. But

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Speaker 1: there's other ways of standing up for yourself. She's an

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Speaker 1: old bit of chick. Just let her ride it out,

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Speaker 1: you twenty nine? Fine, Now he ain't got you no more,

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Speaker 1: But he didn't. Just took his mama's side. There's no

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Speaker 1: way we could be together after this. I say, good riddence.

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Speaker 1: You discovered these and mama's But what you want to do?

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Speaker 1: You gotta go over to even date him? Now? Now,

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Speaker 1: how does this work? Now? How do you go back

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Speaker 1: over that with him? He's still at his mama's damn house.

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Speaker 1: You didn't cussed her out? How comfortable you fitn't get

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Speaker 1: over that now? Right? You couldn't get comfortable at first?

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Speaker 1: Now you didn't cuss her ass out and she said

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Speaker 1: she didn't feel bad. Now, this relationship is all birth,

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Speaker 1: it done, But it was over with before you cussed out.

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Speaker 1: It was over with when he said, you only gonna

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Speaker 1: be around for a season, not a lifetime. It was over.

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Speaker 1: Then after two years, he said that you didn't even

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Speaker 1: have to cuss his mama out. You should have cussed

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Speaker 1: him out, yea, and went on about your business. But

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Speaker 1: this is good riddence. This can never work. His mother

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Speaker 1: will always bring it up. She'll forever be nasty. He's

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Speaker 1: gonna be forever be a mama's boy, and he gonna

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Speaker 1: be in that house for a long time because I

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Speaker 1: don't know how long it takes savor for a house

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Speaker 1: at thirty one, but it take a while. Yeah, it

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Speaker 1: take a while. So he gonna be at the house.

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Speaker 1: And you're dating the dude the thirty one to live

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Speaker 1: with his mom and daddy. What girl, You could do

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Speaker 1: way better than that by yourself. Yeah. And they're putting

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Speaker 1: her down and making her feel badly because of the

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Speaker 1: way she was brought up and all of that. That's

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Speaker 1: not cool. Hey, I was brought up poor, Yeah, all

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Speaker 1: of us single mom. I have a single mom raised me.

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Speaker 1: Come on, you've done quite well for yourself, quite well.

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Speaker 1: You should have just cussed him out exactly. That's where

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Speaker 1: you're anger. But I guess you know you said Mama

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Speaker 1: might as will get something too with this fake ass apology. Well,

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Speaker 1: I didn't really mean it like that. I was saying,

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Speaker 1: you get oh, just because you live over there Alma

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Speaker 1: and Luther King. That's the only reason I said that.

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Speaker 1: And you know, you know the fact that you tries

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Speaker 1: to come over and sometimes and you don't know things.

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Speaker 1: We was gonna work with you. We was gonna try

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Speaker 1: to put you in and you know, cultivate you, comfort

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Speaker 1: you know you just you know, you was just so

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Speaker 1: far deep in the hood. It almost wasn't no saving you.

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Speaker 1: But I'm sorry, I see it. You was ghetto. But

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Speaker 1: did I lie? Yeah, that's a weak apologize. She lit

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Speaker 1: her drawns on fire and win it that old hag. Now,

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Speaker 1: I say, good ridding system. Congratulations. You know, move on,

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Speaker 1: But you can't. You'll never be able to make this

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Speaker 1: relationship work because you see him. You gotta go over there. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: any of the Mama's are you just comes to out?

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Speaker 1: Well here, come to castle? Well look who are here? Yes,

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Speaker 1: miss Ghetto. I guess you told me she'll never live

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Speaker 1: it down. No, all right, listen. If you have come

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Speaker 1: comments on today's Strawberry Letter, please post them okay on

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Speaker 1: Instagram or Facebook at Steve Harvey FM, and then check

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Speaker 1: out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand now coming up

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Speaker 1: in about ten minutes. At forty six minutes after the hour,

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Speaker 1: it will be our girl Cheryl Underwood from the Talk.

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Speaker 1: Right after this, you're listening to this Stave Harvey Morning

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Speaker 1: Show