WEBVTT - Roommate From Hell

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<v Speaker 1>Don't answer the phone. Elvis Duran.

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<v Speaker 2>Elvis Duran's phone tap, Garrett, He has the phone tap?

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<v Speaker 2>What's up?

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<v Speaker 1>Garrett?

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<v Speaker 2>So Aaron wants to play a phone tap on her

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<v Speaker 2>son Matt. Now, Matt took some time off before he

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<v Speaker 2>decided to go to college, and he's about to go

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<v Speaker 2>in a few weeks. So I'm gonna call Matt as

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<v Speaker 2>his new incoming roommate for the new year. Okay, let's

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<v Speaker 2>see what happens. Hello, Hey, is this Matt? Yeah, dude, whoa,

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<v Speaker 2>it's me Jeff, your new roommate. Oh awesome, what's up dude?

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<v Speaker 2>Two weeks or so me and you roommates? Buddy, awesome manes, dude,

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<v Speaker 2>I can't wait, dude, this is gonna be awesome. Is

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<v Speaker 2>there anything that you know you want me to bring

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<v Speaker 2>or you know that you might be bringing yourself?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

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<v Speaker 2>Man, I got small fridge I'll bring. Don't worry about

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<v Speaker 2>the food. I got a hookup at the supermarket down

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<v Speaker 2>the block from school. One of one of my uncles

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<v Speaker 2>knows a guy, so food will be none to worry about.

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<v Speaker 2>Are you a fan of the party atmosphere, because I'm

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<v Speaker 2>all about the party vibe at school.

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<v Speaker 1>Of course girlfriends, yes, no.

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<v Speaker 2>Maybe, all right, don't worry about it. We don't need girlfriends.

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<v Speaker 2>We'll have we'll have a girl every night, if you know.

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<v Speaker 2>One's saying, man, girlfriends in college, bring it down. Man,

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<v Speaker 2>do you know what you're going to school for? Like what?

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<v Speaker 1>Uh?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah? Engineering? All right, cool, Yeah, I'm going into uh

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<v Speaker 2>physical therapy myself. So I already hooked myself up. My

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<v Speaker 2>parents got me this uh massuse table. So if you

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<v Speaker 2>ever need a massage, I'm going to be the guy

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<v Speaker 2>to hook you up. All right, okay, all right, I'm

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<v Speaker 2>the lady. I think you should probably stick to the ladies, right, yeah, whatever,

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<v Speaker 2>But what I'm saying, you know, we're brothers, now blood brothers. Everything.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, we're gonna share beers and you know, if

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<v Speaker 2>you got a little crink in your back, I'm going

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<v Speaker 2>to be the guy to hook you up, so don't

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<v Speaker 2>even worry about it. Speaking of which, are you into threesomes?

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<v Speaker 1>Like what I mean?

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<v Speaker 2>Silly questions, silly question just joke and that's that's my nature.

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<v Speaker 2>But but would you consider it? Uh yeah, sure? Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>all right, so listen, I got to get back to work.

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<v Speaker 2>I just want to see how you're doing. But whatever

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<v Speaker 2>you need, you just give me a call and I'll

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<v Speaker 2>see in a few weeks. All right, brother, all right, man,

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<v Speaker 2>talk to you later. Okay, bye, Erin. I think he's

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<v Speaker 2>a little freaked out right now.

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<v Speaker 1>He's trying to call me right now.

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<v Speaker 2>All right, right, all right, don't pick up. We'll call

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<v Speaker 2>him right back and we'll take it from there.

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<v Speaker 1>All right, Okay, Hello, Hey, I saw you called me.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, Mom, I don't I'm not going to school. I

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<v Speaker 2>don't think I'm going to go off to school. I

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<v Speaker 2>can do school like online or something. I've been thinking

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<v Speaker 2>about this.

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<v Speaker 1>And listen, we all get cold feet. I felt the

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<v Speaker 1>same way when I went off to school. It's okay, Well, I.

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<v Speaker 2>Mean I just talked to my roommate. He just called me,

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<v Speaker 2>and you know, I haven't met him really.

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<v Speaker 1>But basically a nice boy. It's so so you know

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<v Speaker 1>already who your roommate is.

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<v Speaker 2>No, but then he offers, like to give me a

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<v Speaker 2>massage and stuff like he's like a masseuse and he's

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<v Speaker 2>like bringing in his table.

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<v Speaker 1>And second, wait, a massage. It's great because remember when

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<v Speaker 1>you played soccer, you would always get those cramps in

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<v Speaker 1>your legs. That's wonderful, then you could help you if

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<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna get my my roommate I haven't even met

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<v Speaker 1>yet to massage me.

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<v Speaker 2>Are you serious?

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<v Speaker 1>Honey? Did I rad you to be that judgmental? So,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, give this kid a chance. Have you met

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<v Speaker 1>him yet? No?

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<v Speaker 2>No, But you know most other kids don't worry about

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<v Speaker 2>the roommates, like looming a up with oil and and

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<v Speaker 2>oh my gosh, well, but the.

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<v Speaker 1>Oil makes it easier for him to get in deep. No,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not trying to get.

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<v Speaker 2>A massage by this guy. I can't believe you're not

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<v Speaker 2>even backing me up. You don't even understand where I'm

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<v Speaker 2>coming from. Hey, Matt, Hello, did your new roommate? Did

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<v Speaker 2>you give his number? Your mom just played a phone

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<v Speaker 2>tap on you. This is Garrethrom Elvis Durant in the

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<v Speaker 2>Morning Show. Are you serious?

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<v Speaker 1>I told you I get you back. I told you,

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<v Speaker 1>Oh's phone. This phone tap was pre recorded with permission

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<v Speaker 1>granted by all participants.

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<v Speaker 2>The Elvis Duran phone tap only on Elvis Duran in

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<v Speaker 2>the Morning Show