1 00:00:00,680 --> 00:00:01,440 Speaker 1: Cutbooms. 2 00:00:02,279 --> 00:00:05,360 Speaker 2: If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes 3 00:00:05,400 --> 00:00:09,200 Speaker 2: a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants 4 00:00:09,200 --> 00:00:12,480 Speaker 2: of the old republic a soul fashion of fairness. He 5 00:00:12,560 --> 00:00:15,480 Speaker 2: treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the 6 00:00:15,600 --> 00:00:19,600 Speaker 2: rich pill poppers in the penthouse. Wow to Clearinghouse of 7 00:00:19,640 --> 00:00:23,480 Speaker 2: hot takes, break free for something special. The Fifth Hour 8 00:00:23,600 --> 00:00:30,680 Speaker 2: with Ben Maller starts right now. 9 00:00:28,960 --> 00:00:34,440 Speaker 3: In the air everywhere The Fifth Hour with me, Ben 10 00:00:34,560 --> 00:00:39,680 Speaker 3: Mahler and Danny g Radio as we hang out together 11 00:00:40,560 --> 00:00:43,280 Speaker 3: on this weird Saturday. 12 00:00:43,400 --> 00:00:46,680 Speaker 1: So we made it through two days of the NCAA 13 00:00:46,760 --> 00:00:50,080 Speaker 1: tournament and we're not at the sweet sixteen. We're not 14 00:00:50,159 --> 00:00:53,120 Speaker 1: until the sweet sixteen until after the game's on Sunday, 15 00:00:54,040 --> 00:00:57,040 Speaker 1: So we have this weird number. Nobody brags about being 16 00:00:57,080 --> 00:00:59,560 Speaker 1: in this part of the NCAA tournament. But anyway, on 17 00:00:59,600 --> 00:01:03,200 Speaker 1: the on this edition of the Fifth Hour podcast, which 18 00:01:03,240 --> 00:01:06,279 Speaker 1: is the eightieth day of the we're recording this early 19 00:01:06,440 --> 00:01:08,720 Speaker 1: on March twenty first. It is the eightieth day of 20 00:01:08,760 --> 00:01:12,160 Speaker 1: the year and there are two hundred and eighty five 21 00:01:12,280 --> 00:01:17,399 Speaker 1: days remaining until the end of twenty twenty six. On 22 00:01:17,480 --> 00:01:22,120 Speaker 1: this podcast, we have the King of Cool, a podcast 23 00:01:22,280 --> 00:01:27,000 Speaker 1: exclusive story and brotherly love, but not about the Eagles, 24 00:01:27,640 --> 00:01:30,360 Speaker 1: and we will get to all of that and will 25 00:01:30,440 --> 00:01:37,640 Speaker 1: begin with this. I'm pretty confident that by listening to 26 00:01:37,720 --> 00:01:41,520 Speaker 1: this podcast and the radio show during the week, we 27 00:01:41,600 --> 00:01:43,520 Speaker 1: cover a lot of territory, a lot of it is 28 00:01:43,600 --> 00:01:46,840 Speaker 1: sports related. We go off the beaten path, we go 29 00:01:46,880 --> 00:01:51,000 Speaker 1: off the beaten path. You know a little bit about me. 30 00:01:51,880 --> 00:01:55,520 Speaker 1: You know that I don't really get into the whole 31 00:01:55,600 --> 00:01:59,480 Speaker 1: karaoke thing, and that is where this tale begins. I 32 00:01:59,560 --> 00:02:03,760 Speaker 1: did not plan on going to karaoke, and I would 33 00:02:03,920 --> 00:02:08,520 Speaker 1: argue that nobody plans on going to karaoke. Karaoke is 34 00:02:08,560 --> 00:02:12,040 Speaker 1: something that happens to you. It's kind of like you're 35 00:02:12,120 --> 00:02:15,320 Speaker 1: driving and you get a flat tire. When I was 36 00:02:15,360 --> 00:02:20,119 Speaker 1: going to the twenty seventeen World Series, Dodgers and the Astros, 37 00:02:20,160 --> 00:02:22,240 Speaker 1: they would become the cheating Astros. They didn't realize at 38 00:02:22,280 --> 00:02:24,280 Speaker 1: the time they were cheating. I was on my way 39 00:02:24,320 --> 00:02:28,080 Speaker 1: to Dodger Stadium. It was a blistering hot day and 40 00:02:29,120 --> 00:02:32,400 Speaker 1: pop kerfluy that got a flat tire. So I was 41 00:02:32,480 --> 00:02:35,840 Speaker 1: late to Game one of the World Series, which would 42 00:02:35,840 --> 00:02:39,680 Speaker 1: be the most talked about World Series of my career, 43 00:02:39,760 --> 00:02:43,040 Speaker 1: so like it just happened. I didn't plan on the 44 00:02:43,120 --> 00:02:45,560 Speaker 1: tire popping, it it happened. It's kind of like when 45 00:02:45,600 --> 00:02:49,000 Speaker 1: you go to Trader Joe's, and depending on where you 46 00:02:49,080 --> 00:02:52,880 Speaker 1: check out, you get the person at Trader Joe's who 47 00:02:53,040 --> 00:02:58,119 Speaker 1: wants to micro analyze and my favorite is give opinions 48 00:02:58,120 --> 00:03:01,960 Speaker 1: on your groceries. And it's like, I'll go in there 49 00:03:01,960 --> 00:03:06,040 Speaker 1: sometimes I'll buy some pizza dough, some Marinera sauce, and 50 00:03:06,120 --> 00:03:11,080 Speaker 1: some mozzarella cheese. And the girl who checks out my like, 51 00:03:11,160 --> 00:03:12,880 Speaker 1: she's a woman, I don't know, she's younger than me. 52 00:03:13,160 --> 00:03:16,480 Speaker 1: So the woman that checks out my groceries will say, oh, 53 00:03:16,520 --> 00:03:21,640 Speaker 1: you haven't pizza night, Yeah, thank you, inspector. Gadget go 54 00:03:21,639 --> 00:03:24,320 Speaker 1: go gadget. Yes. So anyway, I bring this up again, 55 00:03:24,440 --> 00:03:30,079 Speaker 1: not not mister karaoke. However, my friend Shane was in town. 56 00:03:30,680 --> 00:03:35,560 Speaker 1: Now he lives in Dallas and I see him once 57 00:03:35,600 --> 00:03:38,800 Speaker 1: a year, you know, once a year. So now now 58 00:03:38,840 --> 00:03:44,080 Speaker 1: Shane is my longest tenured friend. And as you get 59 00:03:44,120 --> 00:03:48,960 Speaker 1: older in life, there is a thinning of the herd. 60 00:03:50,160 --> 00:03:52,920 Speaker 1: You have all these friends, and I didn't have a 61 00:03:52,920 --> 00:03:54,840 Speaker 1: lot of friends anyway, at any point but you have 62 00:03:54,880 --> 00:03:57,560 Speaker 1: you have friends in elementary school, fe in junior high 63 00:03:57,600 --> 00:03:59,400 Speaker 1: and high school, and then as you get through life, 64 00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:03,480 Speaker 1: everything kind of fades away. We've done stories on this 65 00:04:03,520 --> 00:04:07,080 Speaker 1: podcast how there's really only a few people that are 66 00:04:07,160 --> 00:04:11,160 Speaker 1: close friends and a lot of like fake friends that 67 00:04:11,360 --> 00:04:15,480 Speaker 1: aren't really your friends but are in the zone. Not 68 00:04:15,600 --> 00:04:19,279 Speaker 1: only anyway, So friend, I say, and this is somebody 69 00:04:19,320 --> 00:04:22,560 Speaker 1: that knows we hung out together as kids, and I 70 00:04:22,720 --> 00:04:25,320 Speaker 1: know his mom, and I know the whole story, and 71 00:04:25,360 --> 00:04:28,120 Speaker 1: he knows he knew my parents. And so Shane is 72 00:04:28,120 --> 00:04:32,159 Speaker 1: my longest ten year friend. We met when I was 73 00:04:32,400 --> 00:04:36,480 Speaker 1: nine years old, not as angry a Bill used to 74 00:04:36,520 --> 00:04:39,279 Speaker 1: say a nine year old girl. I was nine years old, 75 00:04:39,800 --> 00:04:44,000 Speaker 1: which means that he knew me. Shane knew me before 76 00:04:44,040 --> 00:04:47,320 Speaker 1: I had anything resembling any kind of resume. I was 77 00:04:47,400 --> 00:04:52,560 Speaker 1: nine years old, a career or even a fully formed personality. 78 00:04:53,720 --> 00:05:00,080 Speaker 1: Back then, my biggest credential in fourth grade was I 79 00:05:00,160 --> 00:05:04,680 Speaker 1: occasionally could wallop a kickball. So I was decent at 80 00:05:04,800 --> 00:05:09,440 Speaker 1: kickball because of my size, and in Shane's mind, even 81 00:05:09,480 --> 00:05:13,400 Speaker 1: though we are both now middle aged dudes, that is 82 00:05:13,440 --> 00:05:17,520 Speaker 1: still pretty much where things stand. And while I certainly 83 00:05:17,520 --> 00:05:21,479 Speaker 1: don't consider myself famous. I do nighttime radio. I have 84 00:05:21,640 --> 00:05:25,520 Speaker 1: allegedly built a decent career. I was lucky enough to 85 00:05:25,520 --> 00:05:27,520 Speaker 1: work at NBC a couple of times, had a TV 86 00:05:27,600 --> 00:05:30,400 Speaker 1: show for a couple of years. I've done national radio 87 00:05:30,440 --> 00:05:33,880 Speaker 1: at Fox for twenty five plus years now, side gigs 88 00:05:33,920 --> 00:05:38,840 Speaker 1: at big radio stations in Boston at WEI, the iconic Wei. 89 00:05:39,560 --> 00:05:42,400 Speaker 1: I did some fill in guest work at KJR and 90 00:05:42,480 --> 00:05:45,240 Speaker 1: Seattle and the Fan in Denver. So I've done some 91 00:05:45,320 --> 00:05:47,960 Speaker 1: pretty cool things and other stuff that I haven't brought up, 92 00:05:47,960 --> 00:05:51,160 Speaker 1: but if you crunch the numbers, I've actually spent more 93 00:05:51,200 --> 00:05:56,160 Speaker 1: time talking into microphones than most people spend sleeping. And 94 00:05:56,279 --> 00:06:02,000 Speaker 1: yet here is my longest tenured friend who could not 95 00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:05,680 Speaker 1: care less. And I'm telling you I could show up 96 00:06:05,720 --> 00:06:12,440 Speaker 1: wearing a jacket with all kinds of media credentials and 97 00:06:12,720 --> 00:06:15,000 Speaker 1: all kinds of radio stuff and TV stuff, and he 98 00:06:15,040 --> 00:06:18,360 Speaker 1: would say, Hey, remember that kid from elementary school, Donnie, 99 00:06:19,200 --> 00:06:23,080 Speaker 1: who was on that one TV show. That's his guy. 100 00:06:23,120 --> 00:06:27,279 Speaker 1: He loves Donnie. That's Donnie because he was a star 101 00:06:27,320 --> 00:06:30,600 Speaker 1: as a kid. There was a kid in our elementary 102 00:06:30,600 --> 00:06:34,440 Speaker 1: school that ended up on soap operas and made some 103 00:06:34,800 --> 00:06:38,400 Speaker 1: like kind of low budget movies and other TV shows, 104 00:06:38,480 --> 00:06:42,960 Speaker 1: and that's his guy, not me. Some random child actor 105 00:06:43,000 --> 00:06:46,719 Speaker 1: from nineteen eighty seven or whatever it was, has more 106 00:06:46,800 --> 00:06:50,720 Speaker 1: cachet in his universe than anything I've done as at all. 107 00:06:50,760 --> 00:06:52,280 Speaker 1: And part of the reason is he does not have 108 00:06:52,279 --> 00:06:55,360 Speaker 1: the sports team. Shane does not have the sports team. 109 00:06:55,880 --> 00:06:58,080 Speaker 1: He does not believe in sports. He lives in a 110 00:06:58,160 --> 00:07:01,039 Speaker 1: place that is sports crazy, the great Dallas area with 111 00:07:01,080 --> 00:07:03,919 Speaker 1: the cowboy how about them cowboys and all that, and 112 00:07:04,040 --> 00:07:07,640 Speaker 1: yet it doesn't matter to him. He's not part of 113 00:07:07,640 --> 00:07:10,720 Speaker 1: that world. He's not have the sports geen, and as 114 00:07:10,760 --> 00:07:14,480 Speaker 1: a result, it's not great for me. Now, my wife 115 00:07:14,560 --> 00:07:17,240 Speaker 1: says that this is actually good for me. She disagrees, 116 00:07:18,440 --> 00:07:22,800 Speaker 1: it says keeps me grounded. And my response, my rebuttal, 117 00:07:22,880 --> 00:07:27,040 Speaker 1: is I think it keeps me slightly annoyed. And then 118 00:07:27,240 --> 00:07:31,160 Speaker 1: we look at that and say, well, in fairness, typically 119 00:07:31,160 --> 00:07:35,160 Speaker 1: when I'm annoyed, that's where good stuff happens. You don't 120 00:07:35,240 --> 00:07:37,640 Speaker 1: want a happy talk show host. You do not want 121 00:07:37,640 --> 00:07:39,520 Speaker 1: a happy talk shows And that's why I want to 122 00:07:39,520 --> 00:07:41,680 Speaker 1: thank my bosses for making sure they don't spoil me 123 00:07:41,920 --> 00:07:45,080 Speaker 1: with the riches of some of these daytime guys. So 124 00:07:45,120 --> 00:07:48,520 Speaker 1: I become spoiled. They're keeping me grounded. That's it they're 125 00:07:48,600 --> 00:07:50,600 Speaker 1: keeping that's the ticket. They're keep me grounded. So I 126 00:07:50,720 --> 00:07:53,520 Speaker 1: got back to the story. So Shane, my buddy, he 127 00:07:53,600 --> 00:07:58,680 Speaker 1: comes to visit. He loves karaoke, not in a casual way, 128 00:07:59,400 --> 00:08:02,560 Speaker 1: not in and this could be fun kind of way. 129 00:08:03,240 --> 00:08:06,200 Speaker 1: Shane has worked. I'm telling you this guy has a 130 00:08:06,240 --> 00:08:10,880 Speaker 1: government job, but on the side he has worked a 131 00:08:11,040 --> 00:08:15,160 Speaker 1: side hustle for years as an Elvis impersonator. Not an 132 00:08:15,200 --> 00:08:19,280 Speaker 1: occasional thing, this is a legitimate, authentic thing. He owns 133 00:08:19,520 --> 00:08:24,400 Speaker 1: the Elvis jumpsuit, powder blue, He's got the wig, the sunglasses. 134 00:08:25,080 --> 00:08:29,600 Speaker 1: He has been to Graceland multiple times. In fact, I'm 135 00:08:29,640 --> 00:08:33,839 Speaker 1: pretty confident that if Elvis had a homeowners association, Shane 136 00:08:33,920 --> 00:08:38,480 Speaker 1: would be on the board, filing complaints about improper hip 137 00:08:39,360 --> 00:08:43,360 Speaker 1: movements and all that. So naturally he's in town for 138 00:08:43,760 --> 00:08:46,440 Speaker 1: one night. He stayed at the Malor mansion in the 139 00:08:46,440 --> 00:08:50,240 Speaker 1: guest room. We go to the karaoke bar. Now, the 140 00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:54,600 Speaker 1: bar we picked was a dive bar, and I don't 141 00:08:54,679 --> 00:08:59,000 Speaker 1: mean a trendy dive. We are talking about a place 142 00:08:59,200 --> 00:09:01,679 Speaker 1: where the bars stools look like they've seen a thing 143 00:09:01,720 --> 00:09:06,240 Speaker 1: or two bad things. We later found out that this 144 00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:11,040 Speaker 1: dive bar had been on a reality show called Bar Rescue, 145 00:09:11,200 --> 00:09:14,040 Speaker 1: which I had seen every once in a while. I 146 00:09:14,080 --> 00:09:18,760 Speaker 1: didn't really pay much attention to it. And you think 147 00:09:18,800 --> 00:09:21,640 Speaker 1: about it, that is less a badge of honor and 148 00:09:21,760 --> 00:09:24,520 Speaker 1: more like being featured on a medical show for having 149 00:09:24,559 --> 00:09:29,640 Speaker 1: a really unusual rash or popping up on doctor pimple 150 00:09:29,679 --> 00:09:33,200 Speaker 1: Popper because you have some weird thing growing on the 151 00:09:33,240 --> 00:09:37,319 Speaker 1: side of your head, the what you might call it. Nonetheless, 152 00:09:38,679 --> 00:09:42,440 Speaker 1: we were there. My wife tried to order some food. 153 00:09:42,520 --> 00:09:45,880 Speaker 1: She was hungry, she had the munchies. She sees this 154 00:09:46,040 --> 00:09:51,240 Speaker 1: incredible menu on the wall, burgers, all these trendy appetizers, 155 00:09:51,280 --> 00:09:54,959 Speaker 1: which she's more into, all kinds of things that looked 156 00:09:55,559 --> 00:09:58,480 Speaker 1: for her suspiciously edible at a dive bar. So she 157 00:09:59,120 --> 00:10:04,200 Speaker 1: goes up to ordering food and the bartender comes over 158 00:10:04,240 --> 00:10:08,319 Speaker 1: and said, listen, we don't serve any of that. And 159 00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:11,760 Speaker 1: my wife's like, excuse me, you have a menu right here. 160 00:10:13,120 --> 00:10:16,439 Speaker 1: Why would you have a menu if you don't actually 161 00:10:16,440 --> 00:10:20,480 Speaker 1: serve the items on the menu, And the bartender says, well, 162 00:10:20,520 --> 00:10:22,560 Speaker 1: that was just the TV show was here. That was 163 00:10:22,600 --> 00:10:25,680 Speaker 1: just for the TV show. So they have this is 164 00:10:25,679 --> 00:10:27,920 Speaker 1: such a dive bar. They have a menu. The highlight 165 00:10:27,960 --> 00:10:30,280 Speaker 1: of the dive bar was being on this bar rescue show. 166 00:10:30,320 --> 00:10:36,120 Speaker 1: They have a fictional menu. The menu, I guess was 167 00:10:36,520 --> 00:10:38,200 Speaker 1: just for the show that a couple of days, and 168 00:10:38,240 --> 00:10:42,560 Speaker 1: the menu has better representation than I do. So we 169 00:10:42,640 --> 00:10:47,160 Speaker 1: sit down now. Shane is absolutely thrilled because we got 170 00:10:47,160 --> 00:10:51,320 Speaker 1: there early, and he told me, as an expert of 171 00:10:51,400 --> 00:10:55,560 Speaker 1: the karaoke war that he's been in over his life, 172 00:10:55,559 --> 00:10:59,400 Speaker 1: the battlefield when you do karaoke. He has reminded me 173 00:11:00,240 --> 00:11:03,040 Speaker 1: that you have to get there early because you got 174 00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:04,920 Speaker 1: your name in, because it's very competitive. As a lot 175 00:11:04,920 --> 00:11:06,959 Speaker 1: of people love karaoke. You want to get yet first 176 00:11:07,040 --> 00:11:09,600 Speaker 1: song in and settle in. It's kind of like in 177 00:11:09,679 --> 00:11:12,559 Speaker 1: basketball you want to take that first shot, or in 178 00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:15,520 Speaker 1: baseball you will swing the bat right there, get that 179 00:11:15,559 --> 00:11:19,080 Speaker 1: blood flowing and all that stuff. So he puts his 180 00:11:19,160 --> 00:11:22,960 Speaker 1: name in. I'm doing what I always do in uncomfortable 181 00:11:23,040 --> 00:11:26,480 Speaker 1: social situations. I observe. I'm silently. I've got commentary in 182 00:11:26,559 --> 00:11:29,600 Speaker 1: my head. I'm not speaking. This is what I do. 183 00:11:29,880 --> 00:11:34,480 Speaker 1: I do psychobabble in my head. It's my cardio. I've 184 00:11:34,559 --> 00:11:36,559 Speaker 1: learned because I've done this in the in the past 185 00:11:36,600 --> 00:11:39,719 Speaker 1: we've gone out, I've likely talked about it on this podcast. 186 00:11:39,800 --> 00:11:43,040 Speaker 1: I'm sure Lucky Tony will let me know. I occasionally 187 00:11:43,200 --> 00:11:47,000 Speaker 1: will get dragged to a karaoke event, and karaoke is 188 00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:52,400 Speaker 1: its own little universe. The microphone is the most confident 189 00:11:52,480 --> 00:11:56,199 Speaker 1: thing in the room. It's like, give me your worst, 190 00:11:56,360 --> 00:12:01,640 Speaker 1: you're broken, your can't hold a two crowd. I can 191 00:12:01,679 --> 00:12:06,160 Speaker 1: handle it. The songbook is a trap. It lures people 192 00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:12,440 Speaker 1: in with these false promises. Sure you can sing adele Hello, 193 00:12:12,480 --> 00:12:17,959 Speaker 1: why not let's ruin everyone's evening together? Who says no? 194 00:12:19,400 --> 00:12:22,040 Speaker 1: So people get up there with a level of confidence 195 00:12:22,040 --> 00:12:27,439 Speaker 1: that is it's so crazy, it's almost inspiring. You feel 196 00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:30,640 Speaker 1: me on that, you know what I'm saying. If it 197 00:12:30,720 --> 00:12:35,640 Speaker 1: weren't so completely disconnected from reality, A guy who struggles 198 00:12:35,679 --> 00:12:40,640 Speaker 1: to order a drink suddenly is performing like he's headlining 199 00:12:40,679 --> 00:12:46,040 Speaker 1: at Madison Square Garden, the Mecca, And I'm sitting there thinking, 200 00:12:46,160 --> 00:12:49,840 Speaker 1: I talk into a microphone professionally for four hours a day. 201 00:12:50,640 --> 00:12:53,480 Speaker 1: On the weekend, I do one hour on the podcast, 202 00:12:53,559 --> 00:12:56,520 Speaker 1: but the radio shows four hours a night. No one 203 00:12:56,559 --> 00:12:58,840 Speaker 1: should talk four hours in a row like that. And 204 00:12:58,920 --> 00:13:05,520 Speaker 1: yet if you handed me that karaoke microphone, I would 205 00:13:05,559 --> 00:13:10,559 Speaker 1: have flop sweat, would immediately forget my own name. Even 206 00:13:10,600 --> 00:13:14,240 Speaker 1: though most of the people in the bar don't pay attention, 207 00:13:14,640 --> 00:13:19,280 Speaker 1: they're living their lives. They occasionally check out what's going on. 208 00:13:19,320 --> 00:13:23,560 Speaker 1: They're not hanging on every lyric and every line in 209 00:13:23,600 --> 00:13:26,480 Speaker 1: the song. Now for Shane, he thinks everyone is paying 210 00:13:26,520 --> 00:13:29,840 Speaker 1: attention here, so he's in heaven and he gets up 211 00:13:29,840 --> 00:13:34,719 Speaker 1: there and does Elvis and nails it, absolutely nails it. 212 00:13:35,640 --> 00:13:39,000 Speaker 1: He's got the hip movements, he's committed to it. He 213 00:13:39,040 --> 00:13:42,480 Speaker 1: knows all the words. He doesn't even need the teleprompter thing. 214 00:13:42,480 --> 00:13:47,200 Speaker 1: I'm a jig and there may have been a pelvic 215 00:13:48,120 --> 00:13:50,000 Speaker 1: situation that went a little too far. I'm still trying 216 00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:56,760 Speaker 1: to process that. And then we see him, excuse me, 217 00:13:57,720 --> 00:14:01,160 Speaker 1: then we see him. Who you ask, I will tell 218 00:14:01,200 --> 00:14:09,640 Speaker 1: you Jean Claude, Who on God's Green Earth is John Claude, 219 00:14:09,760 --> 00:14:15,760 Speaker 1: Not John Claude van Dam, John Claude, not his real name, 220 00:14:16,240 --> 00:14:19,480 Speaker 1: which is always a red flag in a room like this. 221 00:14:19,600 --> 00:14:26,560 Speaker 1: He's an average sized, older guy of Indian descent. Not 222 00:14:26,640 --> 00:14:29,840 Speaker 1: that it matters. I just want to paint the picture 223 00:14:29,920 --> 00:14:33,200 Speaker 1: for you what I saw. So if you see an 224 00:14:33,240 --> 00:14:40,040 Speaker 1: average guy, kind of older, of from the Indian culture, 225 00:14:41,040 --> 00:14:42,880 Speaker 1: and I'm going to say he's in his mid sixties. 226 00:14:42,920 --> 00:14:45,680 Speaker 1: He could have been in his early seventies. Guy was 227 00:14:45,720 --> 00:14:50,320 Speaker 1: completely disheveled, the kind of person that looked like he 228 00:14:50,520 --> 00:14:55,920 Speaker 1: got into a fight with life, and life did not 229 00:14:56,040 --> 00:15:00,680 Speaker 1: even break a sweat. Body blow, body blow, body blow. 230 00:15:01,520 --> 00:15:07,240 Speaker 1: If exhaustion were a skill set, this guy would be 231 00:15:07,280 --> 00:15:09,920 Speaker 1: a Hall of Famer. It just looked like the world 232 00:15:09,920 --> 00:15:12,440 Speaker 1: had beating him down, you know what I'm saying, Completely 233 00:15:12,480 --> 00:15:16,360 Speaker 1: frazzled the whole thing. So I'm looking at this and 234 00:15:16,880 --> 00:15:19,240 Speaker 1: I got my wife on my right, I got Shane 235 00:15:19,280 --> 00:15:21,360 Speaker 1: is sitting across from me. Now, one thing about Shane 236 00:15:21,400 --> 00:15:25,360 Speaker 1: is he doesn't care about anyone else. He's such a 237 00:15:25,480 --> 00:15:29,000 Speaker 1: karaoke diva. He's only worried about his next song. So 238 00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:33,760 Speaker 1: he performs his karaoke elva song, immediately goes over to 239 00:15:33,760 --> 00:15:36,480 Speaker 1: the DJ okay, here's my next song. He comes and 240 00:15:36,520 --> 00:15:40,200 Speaker 1: sits down and he's playing on his phone. He's posting 241 00:15:40,480 --> 00:15:45,840 Speaker 1: stuff on Facebook or whatever, and he's completely oblivious, obtuse 242 00:15:45,960 --> 00:15:49,120 Speaker 1: to what's going on. So this guy, Jean Clode gets 243 00:15:49,200 --> 00:15:54,480 Speaker 1: up there and again he's just older guy, disheveled, looked 244 00:15:54,520 --> 00:15:57,280 Speaker 1: like life had taken all the joy out of him. 245 00:15:57,320 --> 00:16:00,400 Speaker 1: He gets up there and he's singing a Dean Martin tune, 246 00:16:01,840 --> 00:16:04,720 Speaker 1: and I braced myself because the DJs are now here 247 00:16:04,760 --> 00:16:08,680 Speaker 1: to perform Dean Martin blah blah blah blah blah Jehan Claude. 248 00:16:10,200 --> 00:16:12,600 Speaker 1: So I'm like, oh boy, here we go, Here we go. 249 00:16:12,680 --> 00:16:16,640 Speaker 1: This is the full dive bar experience. Because karaoke has 250 00:16:16,720 --> 00:16:20,560 Speaker 1: trained me the few times I've been to expect disappointment. 251 00:16:20,600 --> 00:16:23,920 Speaker 1: I am emotionally prepared for one of the great train 252 00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:27,880 Speaker 1: wrecks of humanity. I'm talking about now, forget Trader, how 253 00:16:27,920 --> 00:16:30,720 Speaker 1: about a thirty five car pile up in a fog bank. 254 00:16:31,880 --> 00:16:37,720 Speaker 1: And then Jean Claude starts singing again, not his real name. 255 00:16:38,240 --> 00:16:44,120 Speaker 1: Suddenly I am not prepared for anything. I was waylaid 256 00:16:45,320 --> 00:16:53,920 Speaker 1: because this man in the rumpeled clothes just an invisible person, 257 00:16:54,040 --> 00:16:58,960 Speaker 1: like a background actor in life. He's not Jean Claude. 258 00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:03,360 Speaker 1: He is Dean F and Martin. Not an impression, not 259 00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:06,480 Speaker 1: a joke. He sounded like Dean Martin had wandered in 260 00:17:07,359 --> 00:17:10,640 Speaker 1: to this bar from the other side, took a wrong turn, 261 00:17:11,080 --> 00:17:14,960 Speaker 1: crossed the pearly gates and decided to stay. The King 262 00:17:15,040 --> 00:17:19,399 Speaker 1: of Cool was in my presence. The room changed. Mentioned 263 00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:23,879 Speaker 1: people were not really paying attention, and they all started listening, 264 00:17:24,200 --> 00:17:28,560 Speaker 1: and conversations stopped. Even the bartenders pause, which I assume 265 00:17:28,680 --> 00:17:32,680 Speaker 1: violates some kind of workplace policy, and they were excited, 266 00:17:32,840 --> 00:17:37,600 Speaker 1: and Jean Claude finishes, the bar wasn't that busy. The 267 00:17:37,600 --> 00:17:41,520 Speaker 1: people were in there, go nuts talking real applause, not polite, 268 00:17:41,560 --> 00:17:46,879 Speaker 1: good effort, way to go, genuine applause, and John Claude 269 00:17:46,920 --> 00:17:52,160 Speaker 1: sits down like nothing happened, grabs his beer and that's it, 270 00:17:52,880 --> 00:17:57,080 Speaker 1: still looking completely torn to bits. About thirty minutes later, 271 00:17:57,920 --> 00:18:03,240 Speaker 1: Jean Claude said, I'm back, And now he's decided, I'm 272 00:18:03,240 --> 00:18:05,959 Speaker 1: no longer Dean Martin, the King of Cool. I'm Sinatra, 273 00:18:06,680 --> 00:18:15,800 Speaker 1: Old Blue Eyes. And again he dotted the eye perfection, smooth, controlled, effortless. 274 00:18:15,840 --> 00:18:20,159 Speaker 1: He has become now Frank Sinatra in a place that 275 00:18:20,280 --> 00:18:23,040 Speaker 1: can't even serve its own menu because it was just 276 00:18:23,080 --> 00:18:27,000 Speaker 1: for a TV show and it's fake. And now I'm 277 00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:29,600 Speaker 1: doing what I always do. I'm overthinking. I'm overthinking this. 278 00:18:29,680 --> 00:18:31,040 Speaker 1: I'm like, wait a minute, I just saw this guy 279 00:18:31,080 --> 00:18:33,320 Speaker 1: do Don Martin or Don Martin, that's one of my 280 00:18:33,400 --> 00:18:39,639 Speaker 1: positis Dean Martin and then Sinatra, I'm like, why is 281 00:18:39,680 --> 00:18:43,040 Speaker 1: this guy here? Is this the Twilight Zone? Is this 282 00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:46,640 Speaker 1: some kind of portal this guy came through and we're 283 00:18:46,680 --> 00:18:50,240 Speaker 1: going to be shocked. Why isn't this guy performing somewhere 284 00:18:50,680 --> 00:18:53,240 Speaker 1: where people actually pay money for this? This is worthy 285 00:18:53,240 --> 00:18:56,520 Speaker 1: of money. He should at the very least be on 286 00:18:56,560 --> 00:18:59,680 Speaker 1: a cruise ship somewhere, or doing weddings or bar mitzvahs 287 00:19:00,160 --> 00:19:05,760 Speaker 1: where with a functioning kitchen? And why, oh why is 288 00:19:05,880 --> 00:19:10,000 Speaker 1: John Claude sitting here with this level of talent at 289 00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:14,280 Speaker 1: a dive bar sandwich between a guy murdering a bon 290 00:19:14,400 --> 00:19:18,440 Speaker 1: Jovi tune and my friend dressed as Elvis. It kind 291 00:19:18,440 --> 00:19:20,080 Speaker 1: of reminds me that Ted Williams, so I think the 292 00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:21,680 Speaker 1: name was Ted Williams. Remember the story of the guy 293 00:19:21,680 --> 00:19:24,600 Speaker 1: in Ohio with the Golden voice who was homeless and 294 00:19:24,680 --> 00:19:28,119 Speaker 1: America fell in love with him. It's a great story. 295 00:19:28,240 --> 00:19:32,320 Speaker 1: We love the idea that greatness is hiding in plain sight, 296 00:19:32,400 --> 00:19:38,400 Speaker 1: and isn't that pretty much every every other movie back 297 00:19:38,440 --> 00:19:40,920 Speaker 1: in the day. It was like this person who's down 298 00:19:40,920 --> 00:19:44,359 Speaker 1: on their luck, they got nothing, going on, they're just 299 00:19:44,440 --> 00:19:51,600 Speaker 1: a loser, and then all of a sudden, hocus pocus, abracadabra, presto, 300 00:19:51,680 --> 00:19:57,560 Speaker 1: overnight celebrity. Really it's again. This is what it felt like. 301 00:19:58,600 --> 00:20:02,480 Speaker 1: What we don't love is that that it usually stays 302 00:20:02,560 --> 00:20:07,040 Speaker 1: there right that the you know, the person that's really 303 00:20:07,080 --> 00:20:10,720 Speaker 1: talented doesn't get found and all that kind of what 304 00:20:10,760 --> 00:20:12,240 Speaker 1: it felt like. It felt like a little bit of 305 00:20:12,280 --> 00:20:17,080 Speaker 1: a glitch. There's a moment there where something really crazy 306 00:20:17,200 --> 00:20:24,000 Speaker 1: happened right in a dive bar on stage, and this 307 00:20:24,040 --> 00:20:27,480 Speaker 1: person showed up and the place that doesn't deserve it, 308 00:20:27,560 --> 00:20:34,240 Speaker 1: performed just beautifully and then disappeared. Now we did get 309 00:20:34,280 --> 00:20:39,320 Speaker 1: an encore. However, I'm pretty sure that I'll never see 310 00:20:39,320 --> 00:20:42,080 Speaker 1: that guy again. And he has no idea who I am, 311 00:20:42,119 --> 00:20:47,480 Speaker 1: no agent, This guy had no agent, no future booking 312 00:20:47,560 --> 00:20:50,399 Speaker 1: at a bar. It was such a great performance. I 313 00:20:50,400 --> 00:20:52,879 Speaker 1: thought this guy might be doing some makeup. And this 314 00:20:53,040 --> 00:20:57,199 Speaker 1: is part of a different reality show where the famous 315 00:20:57,200 --> 00:21:01,399 Speaker 1: story go back to Elvis, where Elvis pressed he entered 316 00:21:01,440 --> 00:21:07,879 Speaker 1: an Elvis impersonators contest look alike contest and lost that 317 00:21:08,040 --> 00:21:10,200 Speaker 1: they said he didn't look enough like Elvis, even though 318 00:21:10,200 --> 00:21:13,239 Speaker 1: he was actually Elvis. And there's other examples of that 319 00:21:13,359 --> 00:21:15,159 Speaker 1: where celebrities have done that. And so I was like, 320 00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:17,639 Speaker 1: is this guy do I not know some kind of 321 00:21:17,720 --> 00:21:20,280 Speaker 1: Bollywood celebrity or something like this guy might be part 322 00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:23,359 Speaker 1: of I don't know, I've no idea whoever. That guy was, 323 00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:27,159 Speaker 1: What a what a night? He blew me away? Blew 324 00:21:27,240 --> 00:21:32,080 Speaker 1: me away? You know, and just another name on a 325 00:21:32,200 --> 00:21:35,680 Speaker 1: karaoke list for some random DJ. And here I am 326 00:21:36,359 --> 00:21:39,720 Speaker 1: sitting there thinking I've spent my entire career talking into 327 00:21:39,720 --> 00:21:45,760 Speaker 1: a microphone and this random JABBRONI just walked in this 328 00:21:45,800 --> 00:21:48,960 Speaker 1: as Tony Bruno was says, strapper walks into a dive 329 00:21:49,040 --> 00:21:51,960 Speaker 1: bar and did it better than anything I've said into 330 00:21:51,960 --> 00:21:56,159 Speaker 1: a microphone. Twice the microphone knew it too. On the 331 00:21:56,200 --> 00:21:59,800 Speaker 1: way out, I swear, I swear that microphone was looking 332 00:21:59,840 --> 00:22:02,080 Speaker 1: at like you hear me, You hear me, you hear 333 00:22:02,119 --> 00:22:05,240 Speaker 1: what just happened with me? That's what I've been trying 334 00:22:05,280 --> 00:22:11,000 Speaker 1: to tell you. Sound like that guy? Okay, Meanwhile, my 335 00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:14,800 Speaker 1: life of Malarre, It's Saturday Life of Malor. My younger brother, 336 00:22:15,400 --> 00:22:17,639 Speaker 1: as you may or may not, may or may I 337 00:22:17,680 --> 00:22:23,240 Speaker 1: know my younger brother hoorah, he lives in Appleton, Wisconsin. 338 00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:25,960 Speaker 1: I've only been there once. We had a Mallard meet 339 00:22:25,960 --> 00:22:29,000 Speaker 1: and greet. Few people showed up. Smaller event in Appleton. 340 00:22:29,720 --> 00:22:31,760 Speaker 1: I got ripped because it was in a Mexican restaurant. 341 00:22:31,880 --> 00:22:33,560 Speaker 1: My brother happened to know the person that owned the 342 00:22:33,560 --> 00:22:37,000 Speaker 1: Mexican restaurant. So my brother lives in Appleton, Wisconsin. Which 343 00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:39,360 Speaker 1: is a place you moved to. If you're not from there, 344 00:22:39,359 --> 00:22:41,280 Speaker 1: I get If you're from there, I get it. You 345 00:22:41,400 --> 00:22:45,280 Speaker 1: move there only after losing a bet with yourself. And 346 00:22:45,320 --> 00:22:48,280 Speaker 1: I'm not talking about a big bet. Not tattoo your 347 00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:51,239 Speaker 1: face or as my radio friend back in the day 348 00:22:51,240 --> 00:22:55,119 Speaker 1: in Boston Mikey Adams, tattoo on your ass. This is 349 00:22:55,160 --> 00:22:59,040 Speaker 1: more like I bet I can handle winter, which is 350 00:22:59,119 --> 00:23:02,280 Speaker 1: the kind of optimism that should come with a warning 351 00:23:02,359 --> 00:23:07,399 Speaker 1: label and possibly a safety helmet. No disrespect. It's a 352 00:23:07,480 --> 00:23:10,640 Speaker 1: nice place. I had a good time visiting there. Lake 353 00:23:10,680 --> 00:23:15,280 Speaker 1: Winnebago is pretty cool. They have a costco. Appleton's the 354 00:23:15,320 --> 00:23:19,320 Speaker 1: big city. It's the big city compared to green Bay. 355 00:23:19,560 --> 00:23:22,400 Speaker 1: The NFL teams that come to green Bay stay in Appleton. 356 00:23:23,320 --> 00:23:28,000 Speaker 1: It's just not a nice weather place. Every man, woman 357 00:23:28,040 --> 00:23:33,160 Speaker 1: and child can't agree Appleton, for those keeping score at home, 358 00:23:33,680 --> 00:23:39,400 Speaker 1: just got twenty seven and a half inches of snow 359 00:23:40,320 --> 00:23:43,040 Speaker 1: in a single weekend. Let me repeat that for those 360 00:23:43,080 --> 00:23:45,639 Speaker 1: of you who are doing the honeydew list and not 361 00:23:45,680 --> 00:23:49,840 Speaker 1: paying attention. Appleton, Wisconsin got twenty seven and a half 362 00:23:49,880 --> 00:23:52,560 Speaker 1: inches of snow in a single weekend. That is not weather. 363 00:23:52,560 --> 00:23:55,560 Speaker 1: That's according to the weather station in Green Bay. That 364 00:23:55,680 --> 00:23:57,880 Speaker 1: is not whether that is a cry for some kind 365 00:23:57,880 --> 00:24:00,800 Speaker 1: of support. They had to shut down on the schools. 366 00:24:01,080 --> 00:24:05,080 Speaker 1: Rhodes disappeared at one point. I'm pretty confident that my 367 00:24:05,160 --> 00:24:10,400 Speaker 1: brother's house qualified as an igloo, and he was practicing 368 00:24:10,480 --> 00:24:14,280 Speaker 1: the art of being an eskimo, and all of that 369 00:24:14,520 --> 00:24:16,959 Speaker 1: meant that he made a little extra side money and 370 00:24:18,520 --> 00:24:23,480 Speaker 1: probably lowered the property tax probably. Now. Meanwhile, here i am. 371 00:24:23,520 --> 00:24:26,520 Speaker 1: I grew up in southern California. I'm in in the 372 00:24:26,560 --> 00:24:33,479 Speaker 1: north Woods where we had a heat dome dome dome 373 00:24:33,560 --> 00:24:39,600 Speaker 1: dome dome, heat dome, which sounds terrifying. As we know, 374 00:24:41,119 --> 00:24:43,800 Speaker 1: the heat dome has been around for a long time, 375 00:24:43,840 --> 00:24:46,640 Speaker 1: they just didn't call it that. As one of our 376 00:24:46,760 --> 00:24:49,960 Speaker 1: longtime p one listeners who happens to live in Colorado 377 00:24:50,000 --> 00:24:52,400 Speaker 1: and works for the National Weather Service, or I don't 378 00:24:52,400 --> 00:24:54,440 Speaker 1: think it's the National Weather Service whatever. The big Weather 379 00:24:54,560 --> 00:24:58,159 Speaker 1: Bureau is in the Rocky Mountain area. And she told me, 380 00:24:58,240 --> 00:25:01,160 Speaker 1: she said a couple of years ago. She says, Ben, 381 00:25:01,480 --> 00:25:06,040 Speaker 1: all of these weather terms, these scary weather terms like 382 00:25:07,119 --> 00:25:13,040 Speaker 1: bomb cyclone and heat dome, are a product of people 383 00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:18,040 Speaker 1: tuning out weather. Blame it on that. These the weather 384 00:25:18,200 --> 00:25:21,560 Speaker 1: terms which were high pressure system, low pressure system, that 385 00:25:21,680 --> 00:25:24,840 Speaker 1: kind of thing, jet stream, those things had to be 386 00:25:24,880 --> 00:25:28,119 Speaker 1: replaced because people stop paying attention, and plus, in the 387 00:25:28,119 --> 00:25:31,320 Speaker 1: age of social media, you got to get attention. So 388 00:25:31,359 --> 00:25:36,440 Speaker 1: they came up with all these scary terms, terrifying heat dome. 389 00:25:37,640 --> 00:25:40,359 Speaker 1: I'll tell you what a heat dome means. You run 390 00:25:40,560 --> 00:25:43,960 Speaker 1: your air conditioning and then complain about the fact that 391 00:25:43,960 --> 00:25:47,280 Speaker 1: you're gonna have to pay for said air conditioning. Temperatures 392 00:25:47,359 --> 00:25:49,879 Speaker 1: hit one hundred degrees. My car dashboard said at one 393 00:25:49,920 --> 00:25:54,320 Speaker 1: point one hundred and four, which I assume is accurate 394 00:25:55,000 --> 00:25:58,080 Speaker 1: because it has no reason to lie to me. Why 395 00:25:58,119 --> 00:26:02,639 Speaker 1: would my dashboard lie to me. Unlike people, dashboards do 396 00:26:02,760 --> 00:26:07,200 Speaker 1: not exaggerate. It's just a mechanical thing, and that's it. 397 00:26:07,600 --> 00:26:12,000 Speaker 1: The dew Hickey give spits out the temperature if anything, 398 00:26:12,280 --> 00:26:15,840 Speaker 1: they under sell. If my dashboard says one hundred and four, 399 00:26:16,800 --> 00:26:20,639 Speaker 1: probably feels like the surface of the sun with a 400 00:26:20,800 --> 00:26:24,240 Speaker 1: side of regret. So naturally, my brother and I begin 401 00:26:24,359 --> 00:26:28,000 Speaker 1: doing what brothers do. We exchange photo. He started this. 402 00:26:28,160 --> 00:26:31,520 Speaker 1: I didn't start it, mom, he started it. So my 403 00:26:31,560 --> 00:26:35,680 Speaker 1: brother sends me a picture of a snowbank which is 404 00:26:35,920 --> 00:26:38,920 Speaker 1: taller than and I don't know to exaggerate here, was 405 00:26:38,960 --> 00:26:43,720 Speaker 1: taller than a draft, maybe a golden retriever. So I 406 00:26:43,880 --> 00:26:48,600 Speaker 1: send him a photo of my dashboard temperature. He sends 407 00:26:48,640 --> 00:26:53,240 Speaker 1: me a driveway buried under what appears to be the 408 00:26:53,440 --> 00:26:57,480 Speaker 1: entire winter inventory for our brothers and sisters in Canada, 409 00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:02,280 Speaker 1: or possibly the planet from Turn of the Jedi. I 410 00:27:02,560 --> 00:27:07,160 Speaker 1: send him now a picture of a car wash, because 411 00:27:07,280 --> 00:27:10,080 Speaker 1: when it's one hundred and four degrees, washing your car 412 00:27:10,240 --> 00:27:12,760 Speaker 1: feels less like maintenance and more like a nice trip 413 00:27:12,800 --> 00:27:16,520 Speaker 1: to the day sbak. And so this is what passes 414 00:27:16,680 --> 00:27:21,400 Speaker 1: as brotherly love in twenty twenty six, not not the 415 00:27:21,440 --> 00:27:25,359 Speaker 1: Eagles version of brotherly love. It's not about who's doing better. 416 00:27:26,320 --> 00:27:29,520 Speaker 1: It's really about who can complain more about who's doing worse. 417 00:27:30,440 --> 00:27:33,200 Speaker 1: And you have to have in the age of the smartphone. 418 00:27:33,200 --> 00:27:37,960 Speaker 1: You have to have photographic evidence, and just to be transparent. 419 00:27:38,880 --> 00:27:42,400 Speaker 1: I think I'm losing because while one hundred and four 420 00:27:42,440 --> 00:27:46,720 Speaker 1: degrees is uncomfortable, it doesn't require a shovel. You can't 421 00:27:46,840 --> 00:27:49,159 Speaker 1: shovel away the heat. I can't say whether there's a 422 00:27:49,160 --> 00:27:52,680 Speaker 1: heat dome. Why don't I move the heat dome. I'll 423 00:27:52,680 --> 00:27:54,800 Speaker 1: move it over to Arizona because they're more used to it, 424 00:27:54,880 --> 00:27:56,200 Speaker 1: or Utah or something like that. 425 00:27:56,480 --> 00:27:59,240 Speaker 4: No, no, no, no, no, no no no no no, no, no no, no. 426 00:28:00,000 --> 00:28:04,000 Speaker 4: One hundred and four uncomfortable, all that stuff, no shovel needed. 427 00:28:04,400 --> 00:28:06,879 Speaker 4: Nobody has ever said I need to dig myself out. 428 00:28:07,119 --> 00:28:09,640 Speaker 4: It's really hot today. I gotta dig myself out the heat. 429 00:28:09,960 --> 00:28:15,920 Speaker 4: Heat is passive aggressive. Snow will punch you in the face. 430 00:28:15,960 --> 00:28:21,520 Speaker 4: It is confrontational. Snow shows up uninvited and demands manual labor. 431 00:28:22,560 --> 00:28:25,600 Speaker 4: Seriously right, And a lot of you live in snow 432 00:28:25,640 --> 00:28:29,000 Speaker 4: and you have to hire some neighborhood kid to get 433 00:28:29,080 --> 00:28:30,760 Speaker 4: rid of the snow. You gotta do it yourself or 434 00:28:30,800 --> 00:28:32,919 Speaker 4: find someone else will do it. 435 00:28:31,840 --> 00:28:36,320 Speaker 1: It's manual labor. Heat just kind of sits there. It's 436 00:28:36,320 --> 00:28:40,400 Speaker 1: like a bad house guest, making everything slightly worse. The 437 00:28:40,480 --> 00:28:44,400 Speaker 1: bugs come out. They're more bugs and critters and all that. 438 00:28:44,920 --> 00:28:50,000 Speaker 1: Here's the thing. My brother chose this. Okay again, we 439 00:28:50,040 --> 00:28:52,520 Speaker 1: didn't grow up in Wisconsin. We grew up in Calvino. 440 00:28:52,600 --> 00:28:54,080 Speaker 1: I got one brother in New York. I got the 441 00:28:54,080 --> 00:28:57,960 Speaker 1: other one Wisconsin. He moved to Appleton because it is cheap, 442 00:28:59,200 --> 00:29:02,880 Speaker 1: and it is cheap in comparison to Los Angeles if 443 00:29:02,960 --> 00:29:06,560 Speaker 1: you don't factor in the emotional cost of living inside 444 00:29:06,640 --> 00:29:10,720 Speaker 1: a freaking snow globe for five months a year. Now. 445 00:29:10,720 --> 00:29:13,240 Speaker 1: I chose to stay in southern California for my career. 446 00:29:14,120 --> 00:29:18,200 Speaker 1: I had job offers and places like Oregon in Boston 447 00:29:18,240 --> 00:29:21,080 Speaker 1: over the years. And whether it's because of my marriage 448 00:29:21,240 --> 00:29:24,920 Speaker 1: or whether it's because of my gig at Fox I've had, 449 00:29:25,560 --> 00:29:29,360 Speaker 1: I've always stayed. I've talked a lot about leaving someday. 450 00:29:29,520 --> 00:29:32,800 Speaker 1: I probably will end up leaving. Just today's not today. 451 00:29:33,160 --> 00:29:36,160 Speaker 1: Because I make my living in California. I could do 452 00:29:36,200 --> 00:29:38,040 Speaker 1: it remotely. There's a lot of the hosts that do 453 00:29:38,120 --> 00:29:42,960 Speaker 1: the through the shows elsewhere. It's expensive. LA is expensive. 454 00:29:43,760 --> 00:29:48,400 Speaker 1: It does come with the benefit of rarely needing to 455 00:29:48,480 --> 00:29:53,160 Speaker 1: know where your snowshovel is. Truth in broadcasting, I don't 456 00:29:53,240 --> 00:29:55,480 Speaker 1: own a show a snow shovel. I do have a 457 00:29:55,520 --> 00:29:59,240 Speaker 1: shovel which could pass as a snowshovel. It's not big enough, 458 00:29:59,760 --> 00:30:02,240 Speaker 1: i'd I barely have any jackets. I have a few 459 00:30:02,440 --> 00:30:04,880 Speaker 1: just for my travels to cold weather. I do have 460 00:30:04,920 --> 00:30:08,240 Speaker 1: a sweatshirt a hoodie, and I treat that like I'm 461 00:30:08,280 --> 00:30:13,080 Speaker 1: going out on some kind of Siberian expedition to look 462 00:30:13,120 --> 00:30:17,040 Speaker 1: for the wooly mammoth. So really, this isn't a weather debate, 463 00:30:17,160 --> 00:30:24,320 Speaker 1: is a lifestyle audit. My brother saves money, however, pays 464 00:30:24,440 --> 00:30:28,840 Speaker 1: in snow. I spend money, and I pay in heat 465 00:30:29,360 --> 00:30:33,040 Speaker 1: and also money, a lot of money. Everything's more expensive, 466 00:30:33,560 --> 00:30:37,040 Speaker 1: not Hawaii expensive, but California expensive because we can need 467 00:30:37,040 --> 00:30:39,320 Speaker 1: all these programs to help save the world, which is 468 00:30:39,360 --> 00:30:44,840 Speaker 1: not getting saved by the taxpayers of California enough money 469 00:30:44,880 --> 00:30:49,160 Speaker 1: that I occasionally wonder. I sit there and I look 470 00:30:49,160 --> 00:30:50,959 Speaker 1: at how much is going out in taxes and all 471 00:30:51,000 --> 00:30:55,520 Speaker 1: this stuff, and I wonder, could I just move to 472 00:30:55,600 --> 00:30:59,360 Speaker 1: a place like Appleton, And then if I did, I 473 00:30:59,360 --> 00:31:01,160 Speaker 1: would be able to I a house. The size and 474 00:31:01,360 --> 00:31:03,640 Speaker 1: I don't want to exaggerate this either the size of 475 00:31:03,680 --> 00:31:07,560 Speaker 1: a costco, a full super costco and then I could 476 00:31:07,560 --> 00:31:13,680 Speaker 1: just spend the winner complaining indoors. Now, then my brother 477 00:31:13,720 --> 00:31:16,440 Speaker 1: sends me. My younger brother sends me another photo. This 478 00:31:16,480 --> 00:31:22,280 Speaker 1: one is just white, not even scenery, just white. It 479 00:31:22,360 --> 00:31:27,000 Speaker 1: looks like someone erased the world twenty seven and a 480 00:31:27,080 --> 00:31:31,520 Speaker 1: half inches of snow. And I think, yeah, you know, 481 00:31:31,600 --> 00:31:35,960 Speaker 1: I'm good. I'm good here, I'm all right. Because here's 482 00:31:36,440 --> 00:31:39,720 Speaker 1: what we don't want to admit. We don't actually want 483 00:31:39,760 --> 00:31:43,080 Speaker 1: the other person's situation. We just want the right to 484 00:31:43,480 --> 00:31:48,240 Speaker 1: bitch and complain about our own situation. Complaining is the 485 00:31:48,360 --> 00:31:55,320 Speaker 1: national pastime. When done correctly, it is therapeutic. It also 486 00:31:56,160 --> 00:31:59,640 Speaker 1: is something that can be a competitive sport if you 487 00:31:59,680 --> 00:32:03,240 Speaker 1: want to to be where nobody wins, but everyone participates 488 00:32:03,240 --> 00:32:05,520 Speaker 1: in all that. Now my brother complains about snow, I 489 00:32:05,560 --> 00:32:10,400 Speaker 1: complain about heat. Somewhere between us is a perfect seventy 490 00:32:10,480 --> 00:32:15,320 Speaker 1: two degree day complaining about nothing. Right's someone there in 491 00:32:15,360 --> 00:32:19,040 Speaker 1: a seventy two degree This is perfect, And I don't 492 00:32:19,040 --> 00:32:21,960 Speaker 1: know if I trust that person. Frankly, so we keep 493 00:32:22,000 --> 00:32:25,040 Speaker 1: sending photos until we get bored with that. Not to 494 00:32:25,200 --> 00:32:28,280 Speaker 1: change each other's minds, not to trade places, just to 495 00:32:28,320 --> 00:32:35,280 Speaker 1: confirm that whatever we are, whatever we're doing wherever we 496 00:32:35,400 --> 00:32:40,000 Speaker 1: happen to be, it could be worse. And that in 497 00:32:40,040 --> 00:32:44,720 Speaker 1: its own mildly depressing way I find comforting. I do. 498 00:32:44,960 --> 00:32:49,720 Speaker 1: I find it comforting, all right. One other thing today 499 00:32:49,800 --> 00:32:53,160 Speaker 1: is National corn Dog Day. I wanted to mention that 500 00:32:53,240 --> 00:32:54,960 Speaker 1: I should have mentioned that at the start. Bad job 501 00:32:55,000 --> 00:32:58,400 Speaker 1: by me. Today, on this twenty first day of March, 502 00:32:58,480 --> 00:33:02,880 Speaker 1: is National corn Dog Day. Now here's an interesting fun 503 00:33:02,920 --> 00:33:06,200 Speaker 1: fact about the corn dog. As I wrap this up, 504 00:33:06,280 --> 00:33:08,160 Speaker 1: but I'm not wrapping it up yet, So don't leave 505 00:33:09,120 --> 00:33:13,760 Speaker 1: corn dogs, which is a staple of the carnival. You 506 00:33:13,760 --> 00:33:16,160 Speaker 1: put a fried hot dog or some other sausage in 507 00:33:16,200 --> 00:33:21,600 Speaker 1: there and you just go for it. However, I tried 508 00:33:21,600 --> 00:33:26,600 Speaker 1: to figure out who invented the corn dog, the modern 509 00:33:26,640 --> 00:33:29,120 Speaker 1: American corn dog, and that is where it is a 510 00:33:29,160 --> 00:33:33,920 Speaker 1: slippery slope. You open Pandora's box, it gets tricky. There 511 00:33:34,040 --> 00:33:38,160 Speaker 1: was a patent for the food invention that was issued 512 00:33:38,280 --> 00:33:42,640 Speaker 1: in nineteen twenty nine, ninety seven years ago by someone 513 00:33:42,720 --> 00:33:46,360 Speaker 1: named Stanley S. Jenkins of Buffalo, New York. How about 514 00:33:46,360 --> 00:33:51,720 Speaker 1: that Buffalo. Now he's considered the inventor of the treat. However, 515 00:33:51,800 --> 00:33:55,080 Speaker 1: it is interesting to note, as Vin Scully would say, 516 00:33:55,560 --> 00:33:59,120 Speaker 1: The first documented appearance of the corn dog did not 517 00:33:59,320 --> 00:34:03,120 Speaker 1: come until the nineteen forties, so there's a decade gap. Now, 518 00:34:03,200 --> 00:34:05,920 Speaker 1: keep in mind the world was not plugged in. If 519 00:34:05,920 --> 00:34:09,360 Speaker 1: you lived in Buffalo and someone else lived in Iowa, 520 00:34:10,160 --> 00:34:12,960 Speaker 1: that's a different world. Unless you were able to get 521 00:34:12,960 --> 00:34:16,680 Speaker 1: a newspaper, you wouldn't know what's going on. So I 522 00:34:16,719 --> 00:34:21,439 Speaker 1: bring this up because the Pronto Pup Company, a go 523 00:34:21,560 --> 00:34:26,759 Speaker 1: to concession supplier out of Portland, Oregon, claims that they 524 00:34:26,760 --> 00:34:30,000 Speaker 1: are the inventor of the corn dog. They made the 525 00:34:30,040 --> 00:34:33,680 Speaker 1: first skewered, deep fried and battered hot dog, which certainly 526 00:34:33,680 --> 00:34:39,400 Speaker 1: sounds like a corn dog, and the founders, George George 527 00:34:39,480 --> 00:34:43,480 Speaker 1: George and his wife, they got the idea after some 528 00:34:43,640 --> 00:34:48,000 Speaker 1: buns were ruined during the rainy day back in the 529 00:34:48,080 --> 00:34:53,359 Speaker 1: nineteen thirties, and they sold the first Pronto Pups from 530 00:34:53,360 --> 00:34:56,399 Speaker 1: their Fountain shop in nineteen forty one. But wait, there's 531 00:34:56,640 --> 00:35:00,239 Speaker 1: a gentleman in Texas that says, hey, we're the ones 532 00:35:00,320 --> 00:35:04,879 Speaker 1: that came up with the corn dog, and on and 533 00:35:04,960 --> 00:35:09,919 Speaker 1: on and on it goes. So in terms of foody fun, 534 00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:14,279 Speaker 1: hooray for food he fun. Hooray for food he fun. 535 00:35:14,360 --> 00:35:16,200 Speaker 1: Because we all got to eat a couple of things 536 00:35:16,239 --> 00:35:20,920 Speaker 1: real quick. Thank you, Ohiol. Carls Junior has launched if 537 00:35:20,960 --> 00:35:23,320 Speaker 1: You're West of the Mississippi. Carls Junior has launched the 538 00:35:23,400 --> 00:35:28,320 Speaker 1: new Western Bacon Chicken Sandwich, inspired by the iconic meat 539 00:35:28,400 --> 00:35:33,320 Speaker 1: version of the Western Bacon cheeseburger, and that has begun. 540 00:35:33,400 --> 00:35:35,960 Speaker 1: That began a couple of days ago, clocking in at 541 00:35:36,080 --> 00:35:41,760 Speaker 1: eight hundred and forty calories. Why not. Pizza Hut has 542 00:35:41,760 --> 00:35:45,080 Speaker 1: introduced the new Space Jam Triple Threat Box if You're 543 00:35:45,120 --> 00:35:49,320 Speaker 1: into That, and Taco Bell make a run for the Border, 544 00:35:49,400 --> 00:35:56,440 Speaker 1: New Crispy Chicken crunch Wrap Slider, and Cantina Chicken rolled Kaesadilla. Okay. 545 00:35:57,000 --> 00:36:01,120 Speaker 1: Burger King of the New Marketing campaign has fired their mascot. 546 00:36:01,360 --> 00:36:04,879 Speaker 1: They announced a new King saying you are the King. 547 00:36:06,000 --> 00:36:08,800 Speaker 1: Speaking of Burger King. My favorite food story of the week, 548 00:36:09,760 --> 00:36:13,440 Speaker 1: My favorite food story of the week. The office cafeteria 549 00:36:13,560 --> 00:36:17,680 Speaker 1: at the Burger King corporate headquarters in Miami had to 550 00:36:17,680 --> 00:36:23,080 Speaker 1: be shut down for health code violations. Hey yeah, how 551 00:36:23,120 --> 00:36:26,640 Speaker 1: great is that? That sounds like it's right out of 552 00:36:26,719 --> 00:36:32,360 Speaker 1: a nineteen nineties comedy, possibly even eighties comedy. Just wonderful, 553 00:36:32,680 --> 00:36:37,319 Speaker 1: just fricking great, And in honor of Danny g we 554 00:36:37,360 --> 00:36:43,279 Speaker 1: have an RBS story. Arby's has increased their prices since January, 555 00:36:43,719 --> 00:36:46,560 Speaker 1: so a little over two months since the end of 556 00:36:46,640 --> 00:36:50,400 Speaker 1: January by almost fifty percent on many of their sandwiches, 557 00:36:50,880 --> 00:36:56,920 Speaker 1: almost fifty percent upcharge since January. Do the prices ever 558 00:36:57,000 --> 00:37:02,600 Speaker 1: go down? Do they ever go down? I think we 559 00:37:02,680 --> 00:37:05,319 Speaker 1: know the answer to that. Have a wonderful rest of 560 00:37:05,320 --> 00:37:08,360 Speaker 1: your Saturday. We'll have the mail bag on Sunday. We 561 00:37:08,440 --> 00:37:11,640 Speaker 1: look forward to that. So take care of some Enjoy 562 00:37:11,680 --> 00:37:17,520 Speaker 1: the college basketball today, the good, the bad, and you 563 00:37:17,600 --> 00:37:20,120 Speaker 1: know what, so I'll be checking it out. Am I 564 00:37:20,160 --> 00:37:21,920 Speaker 1: gonna be sitting on my ass all day watching? No, 565 00:37:22,000 --> 00:37:24,520 Speaker 1: I got stuff to do today, but I'll be watching 566 00:37:24,719 --> 00:37:26,840 Speaker 1: on my phone. I'll be checking the scores and seeing 567 00:37:26,840 --> 00:37:30,080 Speaker 1: how my bracket's doing and all that. Have a again, 568 00:37:30,120 --> 00:37:32,480 Speaker 1: wonderful day. We'll catch you next time. And that was 569 00:37:32,560 --> 00:37:40,720 Speaker 1: really pinpoint accuracy. Later, skater aasta pasta my felation