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Speaker 1: Let's discuss kids sports, let's discuss club sports. I was

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Speaker 1: out to dinner with someone who played professional sports in college,

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Speaker 1: like legit, and has multiple children who are athletes. I

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Speaker 1: only have one child who's an athlete. But I'm pretty sure,

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Speaker 1: and I could be wrong. I could be low. I

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Speaker 1: believe that last year the club volleyball was eight thousand dollars.

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Speaker 1: And then there are like all these pluses, meaning your

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Speaker 1: uniforms all this time. How much was Britin's volleyball last year?

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Speaker 1: Eight thousand? Right? Okay, so my daughter's volleyball was ten thousand.

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Speaker 1: Her name is not Gabrielle Reese, Okay, just you know.

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Speaker 1: And why do I know that? Because Gabrielle Reese has

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Speaker 1: been interviewed on this very podcast and their voices don't

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Speaker 1: sound the same and they're not the same height. And

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Speaker 1: I didn't give birth to Gabrielle Reese because she wouldn't

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Speaker 1: fit inside my body. So it was ten dollars for

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Speaker 1: club volleyball. And it's we gotta buy the fucking chairs,

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Speaker 1: we gotta go in there, we gotta like get do

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Speaker 1: the snacks, and whose day is pizza to day? And

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Speaker 1: then you gotta pay for them to fly to fucking

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Speaker 1: France or the passport like it's a thing. Okay, So

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Speaker 1: now I'm speaking to someone else and they have multiple children,

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Speaker 1: so that could mean thirty g's a year for your

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Speaker 1: kids to be in club sports? Like how many people's

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Speaker 1: kids are Simon and Biles. I'm just curious how many

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Speaker 1: people become Olympic professional athletes? How many kids do you

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Speaker 1: know that become Tiger Woods? Not to be negative, and

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Speaker 1: I don't mean to be rude, I'm not gonna tell

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Speaker 1: Brenda's I don't think she's going to be a professional

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Speaker 1: volleyball player. I really don't. So like I feel like,

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Speaker 1: what would you spend on your child knowing they're not

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Speaker 1: gonna be a pro? Like I wouldn't. I'm gonna spend

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Speaker 1: more than five hundred dollars for activities, but like ten

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Speaker 1: grand plus plus plus I am. I am a wealthy

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Speaker 1: woman who's frugal but like has nice things. I still

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Speaker 1: think it's insane. So someone else was saying to me

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Speaker 1: that they think it's kind of a scam. And addition,

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Speaker 1: now you fucked me on the ten thousand. Guess where

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Speaker 1: else I got fucked? You want to hear? Now I'm

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Speaker 1: minding my own business, just living my summer. Not gonna

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Speaker 1: wear white after Labor Day. I'm following the rules. It's

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Speaker 1: a memorial day, it's Labor Day. I'm gonna wear red,

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Speaker 1: white and blue. I'm going to enjoy my summer. Fourth

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Speaker 1: of July, we're gonna barbecue. We're gonna make a cake

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Speaker 1: with red, white and blue. The blueberries, the strawberries. We

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Speaker 1: do all right, Okay, we're doing it right. We're following

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Speaker 1: the fucking rules. Okay, Labor Day gonna be annoyed. We'll

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Speaker 1: drive back, hit gem pop traffic, and then Britin's gonna

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Speaker 1: go to school the next day. School supplies, pencil, case, backpack,

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Speaker 1: you name it. I got it, no problem. Now. My

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Speaker 1: assistant's like, you got to be back on the nineteenth

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Speaker 1: for pre season. What do you talk? What do you

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Speaker 1: what do you do preseason for what we're talking about?

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Speaker 1: Preseason for my chicken breast for Labor Day? What do

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Speaker 1: you mean preseason like pre seasoning? What you gotta go back?

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Speaker 1: We got you gotta go back. You gotta leave your

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Speaker 1: vacation and you're going back home because you're gonna do

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Speaker 1: a week of her going to sports every day and

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Speaker 1: so she's going to the school. She's having lunch in

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Speaker 1: the cafeteria. That's school. I don't care whether what she's learning.

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Speaker 1: She's going to school, she's going to her campus. That's

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Speaker 1: a scam. I am prepared for Labor Day. I can

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Speaker 1: handle that. I've gotten. We've been trained with that our

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Speaker 1: whole lives. Who's snuck this in? Now? It's like the

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Speaker 1: four day work week. It's like the work from home

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Speaker 1: person that refuses to come in. Now, summer's over August nineteenth,

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Speaker 1: and I hear people in the South are going like

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Speaker 1: the tenth what no. I protest. I protest the money.

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Speaker 1: I protest the invasion, the invasiveness. Someone said to me

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Speaker 1: the other day, they're ripping families apart because you got

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Speaker 1: one kid doing club this sport, the other kid doing

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Speaker 1: that club sport. Parents are in different directions. They're getting

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Speaker 1: divorces because they're not seeing each other, because they're driving

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Speaker 1: to different auditoriums and stadiums and convention centers and different

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Speaker 1: sports and different places, fucking other people's husbands because that

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Speaker 1: person is on the same sports team as your kid,

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Speaker 1: and your husband is nowhere near you because he's at

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Speaker 1: the hockey rink at six in the morning with your

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Speaker 1: kid getting snacks doing that. He's fucking the hockey mom.

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Speaker 1: It's ripping us all apart. It's so true. This guy

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Speaker 1: who said this to me was true. It's ripping us apart.

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Speaker 1: Why because it's costing us ten thousand per kid. We're

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Speaker 1: going broke. We're fucking pre seasoning not our food, but

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Speaker 1: we're pre seasoning our children. And now we're not seeing

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Speaker 1: our spouses. So now we're having affairs with sports parents

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Speaker 1: from other sports. No, I protest, no summer ends at

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Speaker 1: Labor Day sports squeeze in, figure it out, and then subsports.

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Speaker 1: If you miss any you're not on the team anymore.

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Speaker 1: President's weekend immediately. No, you're not fucking with my President's weekend.

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Speaker 1: What are you talking about. I've never been more patriotic

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Speaker 1: in my life. It's President's weekend. Some people do sports

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Speaker 1: on Thanksgiving weekend. It's Unamerican. This whole thing is Unamerican,

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Speaker 1: and it's Unamerican. They need like a separate section like

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Speaker 1: you're in the could be an Olympic athlete, gifted child

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Speaker 1: that we see promise in section. You can play sports

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Speaker 1: on Thanksgiving because you're gonna be living in a fifty

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Speaker 1: million dollar house in the Hampton's when you're in when

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Speaker 1: you're older, and you're gonna have much longer summer vacations

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Speaker 1: because your whole life is gonna be a summer vacation.

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Speaker 1: Because you're gonna have a yacht so you can pay

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Speaker 1: on the front end. You don't need Thanksgiving Sunday. You're

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Speaker 1: gonna be rich and a billionaire and you're gonna have

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Speaker 1: spokesperson deals for Nike and Puma. But the rest of

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Speaker 1: you schleppers that are not gonna be Olympic athletes. Enjoy

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Speaker 1: your summer, Enjoy your President's weekend, Enjoy your ten thousand dollars.

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Speaker 1: You're gonna need it. You're not gonna be Tiger Woods

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Speaker 1: or some own Biles or Gabrielle Reese. Deal with it.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, let me tell you something drives me

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Speaker 1: fucking crazy. Walk up to a restaurant five point forty

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Speaker 1: five at night, No kidding, I'm an early dinner girl,

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Speaker 1: especially with brain. We're hungry, we're going, we put our

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Speaker 1: cute outfits on. We're dressed for each other. They were

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Speaker 1: on a romantic date with one another, and we don't care,

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Speaker 1: and we go we want to sit down, we want

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Speaker 1: to eat. That's it. We go places it's empty. We

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Speaker 1: could go to any restaurant in the country. We can

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Speaker 1: get into Nobu Carbone, we could get into freaking four

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Speaker 1: Charles Prime. Why because we're going for the Blue Plate Special,

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Speaker 1: the Blue Hair Blue Plate Special. Show up to the

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Speaker 1: host of Stand five forty five on a weekday and

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Speaker 1: the hostess, Hi, do you have a reservation? No, we don't.

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Speaker 1: I think we might have. But the name, Okay, what's

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Speaker 1: the name? Mickey Mass and Donald Duck? I don't remember. Okay,

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Speaker 1: do you know the name? You know what name? I know?

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Speaker 1: Four hundred tables. It's a fucking empty stadium. Right here.

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Speaker 1: I see two people that are ninety seven years old,

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Speaker 1: each like eating and shore out of a bowl with

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Speaker 1: a spoon, like we're good, Like we don't have to

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Speaker 1: do that, and then like, okay, but do you remember

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Speaker 1: what it was? I don't know. I don't know what

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Speaker 1: it was. I don't know. Look at the hieroglyphics in

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Speaker 1: front of you. I don't know what it was in

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Speaker 1: But it's irrelevant because no one's here. I don't like this.

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Speaker 1: This is why I bought an apartment in New York

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Speaker 1: City again, because it feels like going to a hotel transacting. Hi,

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Speaker 1: can I get your room key? Hey? What time? Oh no,

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Speaker 1: we have check in, but it's checkout is at that time? Oh? Hi,

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Speaker 1: you want to call us because we're going to send

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Speaker 1: you some ice in two hours. Like I don't like transacting,

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Speaker 1: and I don't like when, like we have to talk

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Speaker 1: too long to the host to stand about something that's irrelevant,

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Speaker 1: Like what do you mean there's nobody's city. She's like,

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Speaker 1: oh yeah, it doesn't matter. Fuck your fuck reservations. It's

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Speaker 1: five forty five. You get a prize, and you get

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Speaker 1: a prize. Sit down. I don't know why. It's like

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Speaker 1: a grating thing. It's like when someone says, what's your

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Speaker 1: water preference? What? What's yours? A water preferences that I

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Speaker 1: pay thirty six dollars for a bottle of water that

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Speaker 1: is from a toilet bowl in a green bottle. That's

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Speaker 1: what I am, the label, that's that's what i'd like.

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Speaker 1: I'd like that bottle. I mean, I just want water

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Speaker 1: and I just want to sit down a five forty five.

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Speaker 1: I'll be a great old person that can marry Larry

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Speaker 1: David When he's one hundred and seven years old. You're welcome.

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Speaker 1: Don't do to be to be a done to be

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Speaker 1: after