Speaker 1: No entering nervous Stockholm. Oh my god, there's like a
Speaker 1: new there's a new set up here. I don't even
Speaker 1: know which. You accept this official cast Finale podcast? Right?
Speaker 1: You accept this rose into your pain. I missed you, guys. Guy,
Speaker 1: this rose to go for Monday. Oh my god, thank
Speaker 1: you America. We are back. This is a special bonus
Speaker 1: episode of the Finale. My name is Arta Marine. I
Speaker 1: am here with my platonic lady lover and co host
Speaker 1: Aaron Falling. It's good to be back. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: I gotta be honest with you. I was excited to
Speaker 1: be a nationale that I was joned in to hear
Speaker 1: your thoughts on our own personal march madness a k a.
Speaker 1: The Bachelor for nowe. Yeah, I mean I'm already knee
Speaker 1: deep in in my actual march madness Brack blown to shreds.
Speaker 1: And then you know, the final, the final brack at
Speaker 1: the final game of Vanessa and uh, what's his name? Nick? Nick? Nick?
Speaker 1: I almost forgot because I have moved on. Right, America
Speaker 1: officially moved it on an hour later. I'm going I'm
Speaker 1: ready to throw myself at Rachel. Girl. Are you do
Speaker 1: you have any shows you want to promote coming up.
Speaker 1: I'd love to promote this this Wednesday, March through the
Speaker 1: Saturday the Punch Line in San Francisco. I've never hadlined
Speaker 1: there before and I'm super excited and I need people
Speaker 1: to come out, So come on out. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: to my right, Hello, we have the twenty. Why don't
Speaker 1: you sit here? Said there, the seventeen Bachelor of the Year.
Speaker 1: You've done such a good job. You've actually been I
Speaker 1: think the best bachelor in America we have with us,
Speaker 1: Mr Robert everybody, Oh my god, Rob, how are you?
Speaker 1: What is happenings happening? Why don't you go sit over there? Aron?
Speaker 1: Just sitting here? I feel great, I feel far Okay,
Speaker 1: can you hear a loud okay, okay, So what's happening?
Speaker 1: Things are great. It's so good. I've got lots of
Speaker 1: time to think about the Bachelor, which is great. My god,
Speaker 1: I missed you. This has been my downtime this month,
Speaker 1: so it's nice. I've been writing a lot writing season
Speaker 1: two of Kings of con Oh my god, and the
Speaker 1: first season is up right now. You can find on
Speaker 1: comic HQ dot com dot com. That's right. But most importantly, yeah,
Speaker 1: we had a finale finale before we get going. I
Speaker 1: want to say half of the tickets are sold out already,
Speaker 1: no way for them. May seventh zanies very exciting. People
Speaker 1: have been tweeting me their Airbnb reservations and this is
Speaker 1: our last podcast before. If you want to see us,
Speaker 1: you're gonna miss us. This is it, guys. We're not
Speaker 1: having another one until May seven, unless we break down
Speaker 1: and do one Dancing with the Stars one, Oh my god,
Speaker 1: might have to We're going to get you might have
Speaker 1: to happen, but don't see don't knack one. I don't
Speaker 1: know any term is that? Now? Is that tonight? Are
Speaker 1: we going to watch? It's basically this like they wheeled
Speaker 1: out our bag of hairin and they brought in a
Speaker 1: new bag. Are we going to watch it? That was
Speaker 1: the fall. I'm so it's like right now, it's right now.
Speaker 1: And I want to just say there was so much
Speaker 1: great fan art that people sent us about um Shell
Speaker 1: and Pony Well. I can't believe that. I love everything.
Speaker 1: If you go to our Facebook page, you can see
Speaker 1: all of the great fan art. There's actually a link
Speaker 1: to a website where you can buy hoodies and t shirts.
Speaker 1: One these gals made it is so wonderful. Um, so
Speaker 1: it'll be on our Facebook page. But so, for example,
Speaker 1: at Starlet, Prentice sent me an Airbnb. Her Airbnb reservation
Speaker 1: is confirmed. There's so many people that are like, we're coming.
Speaker 1: There's a girl like who's celebrating her twenty six birthday
Speaker 1: with us, So it is truly people canoeing to them
Speaker 1: from Buffalo. It's just been confirmed. People are well, can
Speaker 1: I just tell you really happen in a canoe dot
Speaker 1: com reservation? What? Oh my god? Choppering in from the Ukraine.
Speaker 1: Chloe Chloe at Chloe e I s is coming. She's
Speaker 1: got her flight and Airbnb. So we're really excited. Here's
Speaker 1: the thing. Okay, before we hear going, can I just
Speaker 1: tell you so I was in National working you guys,
Speaker 1: Oh my god. Okay, side note. I will also be
Speaker 1: at Moontower. This is the most I'm gonna be at
Speaker 1: Moontower Comedy Festival in Austin, which is April one, a two,
Speaker 1: and then the week after we do Zanies, I will
Speaker 1: be in Calgary at Yuckix Calgary May eleventh, Best owners ever.
Speaker 1: I'm so excited. They're the club is super fun. I can't.
Speaker 1: I've enjoyed all my yuck yuki. Okay, So you guys,
Speaker 1: So I just went to Nashville, and I mean honestly,
Speaker 1: I felt like I felt like a kid that still
Speaker 1: believed in Santa And it was like December twenty three,
Speaker 1: Like I couldn't sleep. I was there filming, and I like,
Speaker 1: all I cared about was this pot I look, I looked.
Speaker 1: I think I almost got into deep, you know. Like,
Speaker 1: so I went into the podcast with Wells and James
Speaker 1: Taylor and Dan Yelle, who was the blonde new natal nurse.
Speaker 1: So first of all, they're all doing they're all doing
Speaker 1: the they're all going to do the live show. So
Speaker 1: James Taylor is doing it, as is Luke Peal, the
Speaker 1: honky cowboy. No he was not available. Evan and Carly.
Speaker 1: Evan and Carly. But like, I'll tell you this about
Speaker 1: Danielle was funny in person. Danielle had a few good
Speaker 1: one liners. She she's good. I was gonna ask how
Speaker 1: she because I liked her. She you listen to the podcast, Katie,
Speaker 1: she had some Really, she was funny. I think she
Speaker 1: was nervous. Yeah, it's hard to be honest. She was
Speaker 1: what was interesting was so they all hang out together.
Speaker 1: James Taylor invited me to hit game night at his house,
Speaker 1: so I was like, I have to go, and so
Speaker 1: I showed up. First of all, like nobody showed up,
Speaker 1: and I was like, I kind of want to pull
Speaker 1: up Arden's text. God, um, I'm not going to do
Speaker 1: a French accent, but if if you were excitement text
Speaker 1: alone keeping the end to them and they were talking
Speaker 1: of Vanessa as they did on the podcast. They they
Speaker 1: were saying they kept calling Vanessa V. They call her V. Yeah.
Speaker 1: But it was like I felt so crazy, like like
Speaker 1: I was nervous going over to James Taylor's and then
Speaker 1: and so then he was like, do you want to
Speaker 1: come over? I'm having I'm having game night at nine.
Speaker 1: So I got there at like I punched in like
Speaker 1: the number like and he called and he goes, he
Speaker 1: goes hello. I'm like hey, it's hard and he's like, Arden,
Speaker 1: what do you do? And I was like, I'm here
Speaker 1: forgetting and he goes, oh you're here. I'm like, yeah,
Speaker 1: you've invited me, like and he was like, oh, nobody's here.
Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god. So like bastlor contestants
Speaker 1: are clearly, like they all bailed. So he was like, well,
Speaker 1: I'll come down. So he was so sweet. It just
Speaker 1: moved into this beautiful house he'd made. He'd like Pinterest
Speaker 1: board made like this beautiful coffee table that had like
Speaker 1: that he designed. He cut the glass for it and
Speaker 1: he measured it out and it had records and underglass
Speaker 1: like it was he had a record player and you
Speaker 1: know he's a musician, you know what I mean. Oh
Speaker 1: my god, he was so cute. And then the girl
Speaker 1: Kristen showed up. Who was the virgin or the horse
Speaker 1: who wrote the horse who? Liz confessed that she'd slept
Speaker 1: with Nick and so like there I am hanging out. Now.
Speaker 1: Kristen had not met me before, so at first she
Speaker 1: seemed skeptical of me, but then she came around as
Speaker 1: she should. Yeah, it was the most bizarre. Was it
Speaker 1: like he put out like the bat signal and she came?
Speaker 1: Or was I think that they were all supposed to
Speaker 1: come for game night, Like there was a bunch of
Speaker 1: people coming, and I think at that point in time,
Speaker 1: either they were all really late or everyone bailed except
Speaker 1: for me and CHRISTI How long did you stay? I
Speaker 1: was filling in the morning, Like I had to get
Speaker 1: up at like four in the morning. I shouldn't have
Speaker 1: been there. I would have been smashed. I was so nervous.
Speaker 1: I was like, we're playing twister, where's the What were
Speaker 1: my text? What were my text? Well? No, I just
Speaker 1: you know, because I know you, uh, and you know.
Speaker 1: I'm sure all our super fans feel like at least
Speaker 1: they know you, they know me better. The level of
Speaker 1: Arden's just general excitement in life is high. Yeah, but
Speaker 1: the tech exchange, I would say a normal voice, I'd
Speaker 1: crank it to about eight. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll
Speaker 1: just read one. This isn't revealing anything. I'll leave about
Speaker 1: the last name. You guys. Natural look going to be
Speaker 1: so much fun. And even though I have to get
Speaker 1: up early, I'm gonna fucking game night at Jame Taylor's house. Rob.
Speaker 1: Rob got some text for me. Wait, Rob, I thank god, Rob,
Speaker 1: I said, um, oh wait a minute, Uh what did
Speaker 1: I say? And then Katie James Taylor is so cute
Speaker 1: Arton he was the best. I can't even He wrote,
Speaker 1: you were saying that you were going to be in
Speaker 1: Australia in May, and then I said, that's when I'll
Speaker 1: be at a house party in Nashville. That's gonna blow
Speaker 1: everyone's fucking mind. You need to cancel your Stilia trip
Speaker 1: and come to National Rob, And then you were, OMG,
Speaker 1: it's driving me crazy. I really wish they could be there.
Speaker 1: I couldn't even And then you're like art and I
Speaker 1: feel like I'm just laying down all the foundation for
Speaker 1: the most amazing May six weekend we're ever gonna have.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I'm about to go into James's house.
Speaker 1: I'm freaking out, Rob, Rob got I get to go
Speaker 1: to the podcast with Wells and his station to Brow
Speaker 1: with Danielle Neo nital Narson. James Taylor is so crazy.
Speaker 1: I'm nervous, and you wrote whoa I would be to
Speaker 1: wish there? You wrote me to me too, Oh my god,
Speaker 1: Like I was like breaking out. I called Katie, Katie
Speaker 1: and Anna walked me through it. I was like it
Speaker 1: took a village to walk me down. And so then
Speaker 1: on the air, I was so so. Then so James
Speaker 1: Taylor really loves Raven, which we'll get to it. Like
Speaker 1: I think he's thinking of going he wants to go
Speaker 1: to Paradise to get to get Raven. Get in line.
Speaker 1: James I also want to go to Paradise to get ray.
Speaker 1: You should we should qualify for crash Paradise. Why can't
Speaker 1: we crash? I was like this, I said, I was like,
Speaker 1: can I be? You're like, I want to be your
Speaker 1: spiritual advisor? Like can I come be your like weird
Speaker 1: like you know your for turtle twin lady that comes.
Speaker 1: I even talking about it now makes me like I'm
Speaker 1: like sweating. I feel I feel like panicky and excited,
Speaker 1: and it was actually good that I got to get
Speaker 1: a breather before our weekend. So if any of you,
Speaker 1: by the way, all of us are like flying like
Speaker 1: this is this is, this is gonna be the weirdest weekend.
Speaker 1: I want you to have like a cardboard cutout of me,
Speaker 1: or you're not going to be there. Patch is going
Speaker 1: to be their heightener. They're excited your heighter. Please bring
Speaker 1: I can't Australia. Do you have to do? You have
Speaker 1: to go to Australia? Right? What's in Australia a supernatural convention?
Speaker 1: So I will be playing there with my band is playing.
Speaker 1: You're making money, You're not paying lots of money to
Speaker 1: hang out with We're getting paid in and drinks. You're
Speaker 1: getting paid in experience and oh my god, so listen,
Speaker 1: so so you went there? I want to ask I
Speaker 1: want to ask this question. This is the question that
Speaker 1: I want. They all hang out with each other. That's
Speaker 1: what they do. They do. They all hang out with
Speaker 1: the dinner and they like cross pollin eight seasons right,
Speaker 1: So so like the virgin Is this season, James Taylor
Speaker 1: last season. Yeah, and there was another girl I got
Speaker 1: listen to item stuttering now. I got put over the
Speaker 1: edge when I thought Olivia who got left by the blowhole?
Speaker 1: They said Olivia will be there, and I was like Olivia,
Speaker 1: I thought, And it was some other Olivia. Was there
Speaker 1: another Olivia contestant? Every season there's an Olivia. There were
Speaker 1: a couple of bowles. There were so many blowholes, so
Speaker 1: many empty canyons, bab I can't remember when Pam got
Speaker 1: dumped blowhole in New Zealand. I get the feeling that
Speaker 1: I get the feeling that they don't hang out with Okay, okay,
Speaker 1: side note, So Danielle Face timed with the while I
Speaker 1: was there, and she was so beautiful And as my
Speaker 1: mom watched the finale, Janna Marine Mittens is doing really well,
Speaker 1: so Janna Marine watched the finale and she was like, well,
Speaker 1: Vanessa's sexy as hell, like she she she preferred Raven,
Speaker 1: but she said, Vanessa, can you just want to sit
Speaker 1: with that for just saying so she was talking to her,
Speaker 1: just faced him, and the second sorry, and the second
Speaker 1: she said I'm doing a podcast. She sort of had
Speaker 1: to quickly go. She was like, I think she was
Speaker 1: like shopping at like the Grove or something, because she said,
Speaker 1: what do you think of these shoes? Are these shoes cute?
Speaker 1: Should I buy them? Yeah? You should tell like, I like, sorry,
Speaker 1: but trashing you all? Actually no, I was on team
Speaker 1: Vanessa for a while. Um, but but so she was
Speaker 1: on the face time. She was so beautiful, she's she
Speaker 1: literally she's stunning. That's I tried to talk French to
Speaker 1: her and she was like, what does that mean? Said
Speaker 1: a load of Katie. Yet Katie over here, Katie head
Speaker 1: of the Nerdess podcast network, Katie, I'm so sorry. I
Speaker 1: got bachelor fever for a second and I've been making
Speaker 1: some bad decisions. Your kids look great in nut shirt.
Speaker 1: Can I say that You've got a nice little rack?
Speaker 1: Thank you? You have a real rack. I've never seen
Speaker 1: that before. You're that actually great? If they do, it's
Speaker 1: a bad thing and great in that shirt. Well now
Speaker 1: that I'm staring at her chest art and now it's awkward.
Speaker 1: But you have a great was that a great body?
Speaker 1: Like a great body, and I didn't know she had
Speaker 1: a great flip it? I let them out, you know what,
Speaker 1: I no, no offense, but I can't look are usually
Speaker 1: in jog bras and once in a while I let
Speaker 1: him out. It's the same thing as you're looking at
Speaker 1: anything different today than your lady. Yeah, but I'm also
Speaker 1: like a pick so yeah, but you're lady's great. That
Speaker 1: really get to the dressing, the three kid face. But
Speaker 1: let me look at that. Rios also like okay, So Katie,
Speaker 1: yes you heard the podcast. Lest could you believe what
Speaker 1: was happening? It was so exciting. I wish I was there.
Speaker 1: I saw jealous of the whole time. If I was rich,
Speaker 1: I would We need to get kidded to Nashville. Can
Speaker 1: we start a Kickstarter? No? I don't want people. People.
Speaker 1: There's so many big right, you're right, you're right. How
Speaker 1: about Miles? What do you have a name a company?
Speaker 1: What if somebody don't know what if somebody donated their
Speaker 1: miles to get you there, I would take that. If
Speaker 1: anybody wants to donate miles to get to Nashville, even
Speaker 1: one week I had miles, I would seriously even one
Speaker 1: way I used my miles and then they used my
Speaker 1: miles to get there. The year tweetos if you're willing
Speaker 1: to use your miles to get where you were for
Speaker 1: a plane company could do like a standby row doesn't sell.
Speaker 1: We have planes. We have big planes. If you're like
Speaker 1: a airline steward and there you go and you can
Speaker 1: get the plus one like sometimes people get fly like
Speaker 1: so if you were to fly like Katie would be
Speaker 1: your companion. If you want to fly with Katie from
Speaker 1: Los Angelet's say you're a plane company waitress and guy,
Speaker 1: you get an extra you've done serving the drinks and
Speaker 1: you get a extra little space where they keep the suits.
Speaker 1: Shove Katie right there. They're small like just started rack
Speaker 1: rack you need you need extra carry alight rap U. Yeah, buddy, boy,
Speaker 1: this is my name is Arden. You. I just want
Speaker 1: to be there. I don't want to be in Australia.
Speaker 1: I wish I was just we gotta, we gotta get Miles.
Speaker 1: Get what I was going to say, Um, that would
Speaker 1: be a great indie movie is get Katie to the
Speaker 1: podcast on the street we have like breaker, I think
Speaker 1: our fans want to meet you enough. That's some someone's
Speaker 1: spending habit that's out of hand, that's got miles or
Speaker 1: where's Karin when we need to latinum credit card? Yes,
Speaker 1: somebody with miles. Let's get Katie there. Also, if someone
Speaker 1: could buy me snacks, I don't need. Yeah, snacks for
Speaker 1: all of us. Really, we're all sharing one room there.
Speaker 1: We're all like literally, it's going to be a ship show.
Speaker 1: I know somebody's bringing Anna's bringing down. I have air
Speaker 1: and I have a face mask. And when you take
Speaker 1: Anna's annex. Before we get going, I want to give
Speaker 1: a shout out to Rihanna, not the Rihanna. Okay, it's
Speaker 1: at Rihanna with like twenty and twenty eight. I arrived
Speaker 1: at the UH the corporate institution that I work at,
Speaker 1: which is the Maldown Comic Book Store, and I'm in
Speaker 1: my backup in the treehouse where I belong and there
Speaker 1: was a box for me, and I was like, this
Speaker 1: is either filled with toe nail clippings and haircutting or
Speaker 1: this is but it was heavier than that because I've
Speaker 1: believe I've already received a few of those. And inside,
Speaker 1: if you guys remember the Falcon, when the Falcon Robbie,
Speaker 1: when the Falcon had his hometown visit and he had
Speaker 1: a we'll put a photo on our Facebook page. He
Speaker 1: had a guy like a why his family was drinking
Speaker 1: out of wine glasses that had that had like a
Speaker 1: like a tumbler over them. Um, he made it home
Speaker 1: to he made it hometown place. He was Number two
Speaker 1: was white? Were white? Right when they went to they
Speaker 1: went to his family's house, they were drinking out of
Speaker 1: these plastic wine glasses that had tumblers over there. And
Speaker 1: we talked about them on air with the Falcon, and
Speaker 1: so we got I got a box with four of
Speaker 1: them and it says high art and a team and
Speaker 1: clothes you will find Turvis goblets. These are the very
Speaker 1: cups used by the family of the Falcon. By the way,
Speaker 1: side noteed we'll get to the best closure of a
Speaker 1: business letter ever. I know we all love the Falcon obviously,
Speaker 1: and these have actually been discontinued, so I was unable
Speaker 1: to personalize them with your names and cabinet positioned sad face.
Speaker 1: But I worked for Turvis, so I still have to
Speaker 1: round them up and send them to I hope you
Speaker 1: received them in time to use for the finale. I'm
Speaker 1: in northwest Florida, but I might be able to make
Speaker 1: the trip up to Nashville for the live show. I'm
Speaker 1: using a lot of exclamation parks in this letter. Wow,
Speaker 1: hope you like the gift. And then she wrote in
Speaker 1: like I'm gonna say size sixt font sag bones. I
Speaker 1: want you to know Rihanna. First of all, Rihanna, thank
Speaker 1: you so much for your gift. It's I'm going I'm
Speaker 1: going to bring them to Nashville, and I'm going to
Speaker 1: paint on them in nail polish our names, and I'm
Speaker 1: going to use them on on the stage live at Nashville.
Speaker 1: So if you can get it'll be a right off.
Speaker 1: It'll be a write off. Right is, you can come
Speaker 1: to Nashville and have it be a write off, and
Speaker 1: you can get pictures of us using your thing on stage,
Speaker 1: and you can use it from a little bit right off,
Speaker 1: screaming eron fully white wines spread. Sir, thank you so much.
Speaker 1: This is truly the greatest gift that's ever happened. So
Speaker 1: we appreciate that. Katie. We gotta get you to Nashville,
Speaker 1: get in. I wish I was a regular on a show.
Speaker 1: As it is, I'm still paying my taxes from I
Speaker 1: haven't even filed since I. Okay, here we go. I
Speaker 1: want I keep forgetting what it because I'm just so
Speaker 1: thrown by the after Nashville. Let's come back and have
Speaker 1: a film me in on what it was like. I
Speaker 1: want that's exactly I want to know things like they
Speaker 1: call her V to me that that's exactly made my week.
Speaker 1: They call her V. They call her V. She also,
Speaker 1: she said. Danielle exclaimed she goes V loves Nick. She's
Speaker 1: super in on She said, V is by the way,
Speaker 1: we're gonna have like a house party like Saturday night.
Speaker 1: You've got to just not make any money and you
Speaker 1: need to, like instead of making a few grand, you
Speaker 1: need to spend a few grand and get to Nashville.
Speaker 1: List It's but you know, I don't think she would mind.
Speaker 1: I don't think she would mind me saying this. The
Speaker 1: best text was when I was texting everybody what I
Speaker 1: was about to do. Padget texted in, who's on Criminal
Speaker 1: Minds and is working and that's why she's not here today,
Speaker 1: our secretary of State. She goes Ardent, I want, I
Speaker 1: want Ardents life with my CBS money, and I rode back.
Speaker 1: I would rather have your CBS money, and she so anyway, Robanimi,
Speaker 1: here we are. So if you guys listen to last week,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. My notes are my notes from the episode.
Speaker 1: But now I can speak freely because I'm not with
Speaker 1: somebody who fucking dated Nick. And Wells is like Nick's
Speaker 1: best friends. I can speak freely. They're really good friends
Speaker 1: and like, okay, so Rovanie Wells. By the way, Katie,
Speaker 1: he's so cute. His ass is about six inches wide,
Speaker 1: but he's like six ft two and cute as ship.
Speaker 1: He's a lean guy, he's a he made us all
Speaker 1: old fashions. He made us all old fashions. And he's
Speaker 1: a thin guy. But he is really cute. Okay, here
Speaker 1: we go on. The show is gorgeous. I mean, James
Speaker 1: Taylor was very like he was definitely read all you
Speaker 1: loved him. James Taylor got better and better looking as
Speaker 1: his personality almost after the show. You know what, And
Speaker 1: I get the feeling that he's gotten some ladies who
Speaker 1: slung themselves at him, and I think he enjoyed it
Speaker 1: for a little bit and now he just wants a
Speaker 1: nice girl and like, but I think it maybe gave
Speaker 1: him a little confidence. He had a month or two
Speaker 1: tear where he got to be like yeah and like
Speaker 1: he's done, Like he's not still stick in the dick
Speaker 1: in the hair trying to figure it out. Yeah, And
Speaker 1: I think he got confident and that like he seems
Speaker 1: like such a gentleman and like he wants a nice girl.
Speaker 1: But but I think it was good for him to
Speaker 1: see like, no, you are desirable, you know, like, oh yeah,
Speaker 1: he said he's a little hunky Haley. That's I'm showing
Speaker 1: you a picture of Haley now right, Yeah, yes, my
Speaker 1: newt that was the best thing that ever happened are
Speaker 1: speaking of Haley? Gorgeous? I mean it, can we just
Speaker 1: talk freely because I feel like this is a breaking
Speaker 1: down the season. Was that FaceTime with Haley the best
Speaker 1: thing that ever happened to you? I tried to get
Speaker 1: in tight here, yeah, I mean free here. It was unbelievable,
Speaker 1: was really great and like it did not expect the turnaround,
Speaker 1: the switch because I was like, she loves she loves
Speaker 1: super Next, she couldn't believe she was talking to Rob.
Speaker 1: It was the weird. I was like, were you here
Speaker 1: for that? No? That was okay. So Rob was so nervous.
Speaker 1: He changed his outfit to look more Canadian, and he
Speaker 1: like put on what did you put on a maple leaf?
Speaker 1: He put on the entire saying, you know, you know
Speaker 1: how hot it is up here too. He wore like
Speaker 1: a like a like a hot version of a lumberman Rob.
Speaker 1: And it's so fu hot up here, like it do
Speaker 1: not breathe up here, like heat rises and it does
Speaker 1: not breathe. And there's like there's like decades of like
Speaker 1: nerd sweat up here. You know, it's just riddled with
Speaker 1: like lowly virgin sweat. And Rob is here dressed like
Speaker 1: the tundra, and and she was like and then we
Speaker 1: had like after text. We had some after text where
Speaker 1: she was like, oh mg, I was so nervous to me.
Speaker 1: And then Rob and I had a side text going
Speaker 1: on that was like Rob like holy ship, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean? He couldn't deal. And then we were
Speaker 1: like how do we reply? Like Rob and drop off?
Speaker 1: That's shunt it down. It's cheasy easy with the moose knuckle.
Speaker 1: He's got a good rack, like CARDI not that I'm looking.
Speaker 1: I'm not allowed to looking at your rack, but your
Speaker 1: rack is tremendous. I say that. I'm not allowed to
Speaker 1: say that. All right, So here we are in roven Nemi,
Speaker 1: and so we're in Finland. We're starting the episode. He's
Speaker 1: skipping with Elves, the lady Elves and the fucking so
Speaker 1: then Santa the like the molester. Santa's hiding behind the
Speaker 1: trees waiting as he's skipping, and all those Dancing with
Speaker 1: the Stars ads. He was, he was so the Santa
Speaker 1: was so creepy. And the fact that he's spoken the
Speaker 1: you know, Finnish or whatever made him creepier. The whole thing,
Speaker 1: the whole thing. I will did you want to know
Speaker 1: what Danielle said? That was funny. She said he looked
Speaker 1: like he put hot rollers in his beard. That's funny,
Speaker 1: that's funny. That's funny. Did you guys see the white
Speaker 1: van behind the U the U Santa's house? No? Is
Speaker 1: that a joke? White man? Really? Did you do? You
Speaker 1: guys don't see the white fan. There's no windows heightener.
Speaker 1: I texted heighters they was great as Santa and I've
Speaker 1: killed so many women in that ship. I told them that,
Speaker 1: and they stared at me like, oh, okay, okay, since
Speaker 1: we're spoiled, we're hanging around with comics all the time.
Speaker 1: I know, I know. Well. So when I went to
Speaker 1: James Taylor's house, he played our theme song for Oh
Speaker 1: my God, I'm into Deep. You guys, I'm actually I'm
Speaker 1: worried about me. Like as I'm saying this, I'm realizing
Speaker 1: I'm like if I had told you last year that
Speaker 1: you were going to say so when I went to
Speaker 1: James Taylor and that, I'm more excited about that James
Speaker 1: Taylor than if I went to Jailer. I do think
Speaker 1: maybe right now you're a hologram and you're still in
Speaker 1: a James Taylor. I went to James Taylor's house and
Speaker 1: he played Danielle the Virgin the theme songs. He enjoyed
Speaker 1: it so much, and she looked at me and she
Speaker 1: goes at it, yeah, because you need a you need
Speaker 1: a hook, And I thought you yeah, And I thought,
Speaker 1: I I like the Virgin. I like the neo Natal.
Speaker 1: I was like, I prefer so Kristen. That was Kristen.
Speaker 1: That was Kristen. Do you need the hook? I guess
Speaker 1: she was like, I need a theme song. So I
Speaker 1: like Danielle the neo natal nurse. This was this was
Speaker 1: what does she mean you need the song? Still needs know?
Speaker 1: She was saying, no, it's cute, like that's fun. You
Speaker 1: got a fun hut? And I was like, I don't
Speaker 1: like that. I don't like you saying that. But then
Speaker 1: but then she grew on me a little bit. She
Speaker 1: was kind of funny, but like I was like, I
Speaker 1: felt misunderstood, and I felt like I've been with like
Speaker 1: comics for the name of this episode, might have to
Speaker 1: bet a hut. You got a nice huh, that's cute?
Speaker 1: Kept calling it cute, like that's not cute. I also said, note,
Speaker 1: I want you guys to know that I found the
Speaker 1: fucking romper stores and I tried to go to a
Speaker 1: romper store to buy a romper to shove my quirky
Speaker 1: body and for the national live show. So I went
Speaker 1: into the romper store because I saw, my god, I'm
Speaker 1: in too deep. I'm worried about me. Because I said
Speaker 1: that Carl Carly from Evident Carly had tweated about these
Speaker 1: went into the romper story, and this was the fucking exchange.
Speaker 1: It was this, are you liking for anything in particular?
Speaker 1: I was like, no, I'm just looking really live. Do
Speaker 1: you live here, Naturale? No, I'm in from where do
Speaker 1: you live? California? Wearing California? I'm like Los Angeles? And
Speaker 1: she was like, oh, you're from Los Angeles. Let me
Speaker 1: ask you a question. Do you like these shorts? I like,
Speaker 1: not really, and then she goes, so what are you
Speaker 1: doing here? It's like I'm working. She's like, um, what
Speaker 1: do you do? And I thought I can't answer that.
Speaker 1: I was like a little of this, a little of that,
Speaker 1: and then she goes, Then she goes, did you work
Speaker 1: here a lot? I mean it was truly. I was like,
Speaker 1: I I will. I'm gonna take bath salt and eat
Speaker 1: your face off, girl, like I would have given you
Speaker 1: sixty bucks for the stupid cold shoulder romper that I
Speaker 1: should not be wearing at my age and with my
Speaker 1: body type. And now I'm sad. I'm gonna take bath
Speaker 1: all to go to jail because I eat your face
Speaker 1: off because you asked me, because you wouldn't leave me
Speaker 1: alone to show my stupid body in this one. I
Speaker 1: love that you went from a little of this, a
Speaker 1: little that, to just eating her face. And there's actually
Speaker 1: no one between. There's not like you know what, I'm
Speaker 1: just gonna I'm just looking around and then you leave.
Speaker 1: It's either I was in you tell me how you
Speaker 1: feel I had I tried to avoid her. I was.
Speaker 1: I was in the dressing room where there's a curtain,
Speaker 1: and she came and stood there outside of the curtain
Speaker 1: asked me those weird and that's when you go right
Speaker 1: to go. She finger on the cur I was like,
Speaker 1: I was not ready for the finger blast. But circle
Speaker 1: finger blast, seasoned finger circle fingerball circle finger it's a
Speaker 1: little freakdeacherful moment. Side, I'm so glad my friend Connie,
Speaker 1: who plays Yoga Jones on Riches and New Black, was
Speaker 1: going to come to the podcast. And then when she
Speaker 1: but then she like she found out that we weren't
Speaker 1: super into Vanessa and Nick, and so she came down
Speaker 1: to the comic bookstore and then she realized that she
Speaker 1: would like get teary eyed and cry and now with
Speaker 1: full circle finger, I'm so glad that I could be
Speaker 1: free and get to best salts of full circles because
Speaker 1: she would not I would actually have lost a friend today.
Speaker 1: Oh that's not good. She doesn't need to know that
Speaker 1: I'm getting finger blested before I take bad salts at
Speaker 1: a Rockferst store and steals Caroltt and Nashville. My favorite
Speaker 1: is that Aaron did the Usain Bolt, like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: falter Katie. How many miles look up? How many miles
Speaker 1: we need? I think we need? I think I'm an American.
Speaker 1: It's twenty tho. One way we could get you one way.
Speaker 1: Let's get Katie one way. She never get back. You'll
Speaker 1: just marry Jims Taylor. What if she stayed na Nashville
Speaker 1: is great. By the way, if you guys are coming
Speaker 1: to Nashville and I we really hope that you do.
Speaker 1: There is here's some fun things to do because it
Speaker 1: take me a little bit to figure out Nashville. I'll
Speaker 1: give you guys the top four things I enjoyed doing.
Speaker 1: Number one Robert finger Blast. Number two Jack Whites record store.
Speaker 1: Third Man Records is great. Um. I enjoyed the tour
Speaker 1: at the Hatch Show Print which is at the which
Speaker 1: is where they do all the old It's super cool.
Speaker 1: And then like, if you're a girl, anyone does like
Speaker 1: a ladies day out without getting finger blasted at a
Speaker 1: rapper store. The area twelve South is really cute. So
Speaker 1: if you guys are going to Nashville, you only have
Speaker 1: like one day. You don't know where to go. I've
Speaker 1: just been finger blasted there for two weeks, and so
Speaker 1: that's where I would say another Yeah, chasing a Shetland
Speaker 1: pony with the ship. Every sitting Okay, who was there?
Speaker 1: By the way, he was there? Okay, we haven't even started,
Speaker 1: so we get okay, so we know. The good news
Speaker 1: is it's a very simple episode. So they go to
Speaker 1: some hut in the woods where Nick's gigantic family is.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, it was so fucking bored. Anna texted
Speaker 1: a photo. Anna can't be here today, but she texted
Speaker 1: a photo of Nick standing next to the table. Did
Speaker 1: you guys see that where he looks gigantic? Is Nick? Anna?
Speaker 1: Wait a minute, let me find this Anna and Katie?
Speaker 1: Is that Look at this? Look at this photo? Does
Speaker 1: he look huge? He was at the table that his
Speaker 1: family was like hosting that. We'll put this online too.
Speaker 1: Maybe it's just a really small table, but look how big.
Speaker 1: He locks. He looks huge that. I also feel like
Speaker 1: the ceiling is at a weird angle. Is it like
Speaker 1: a sloped snow sledge sledge? Dude? Okay, so his family's right,
Speaker 1: I think he was. He's told his sisters like six nuns.
Speaker 1: His sister what's her name? Uh, she's ten, going on
Speaker 1: high school. So they go to meet Raven. Raven was
Speaker 1: so sweet and his family I feel like the boys,
Speaker 1: the men and his family hate him. The mom looks devastated.
Speaker 1: The dad is a crier. Yeah, so the two of them.
Speaker 1: So Raven goes, she's so sweet. Vanessa goes. She wears
Speaker 1: her flashdance top and like it's pushy and weird, but
Speaker 1: like the family sees that they love each other. Yeah,
Speaker 1: this family just looks so just down and they couldn't
Speaker 1: stop at that narrative, Like, but will they say yes? No,
Speaker 1: one says. The father basically spelled it out. He looked
Speaker 1: right at his son. He's like, this is who you date,
Speaker 1: a gay Vanessa and it doesn't work and it won't work, Katie.
Speaker 1: Do you want to be on a mic here? Okay,
Speaker 1: you need to get in on this. I mean he
Speaker 1: he took his head out of the bad Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1: He made a ball out of an apple because he
Speaker 1: couldn't fly with it to Finland. Some busy carving bombs,
Speaker 1: and he made one out of a cereal box. He
Speaker 1: looked at Nick with his working one eye, said you
Speaker 1: picked the wrong woman every time, and he's like, I
Speaker 1: didn't notice that, did he? Really? I didn't know what
Speaker 1: I was going north He stops, I didn't notice that?
Speaker 1: Done it? Ever? I didn't either? But I love it? Yeah?
Speaker 1: He there was like during did you notice that, kiddn't?
Speaker 1: How did you not know his eyeballs were little? During
Speaker 1: a time I hadn't watched it fucking prose anything. I
Speaker 1: did watch it in America. During the talking head section,
Speaker 1: all of a sudden it was like, yes, he got
Speaker 1: the other eyeball back in, Yeah, you picked the wrong lady.
Speaker 1: It was literally, yeah, had eyeballs were Those guys felt
Speaker 1: like they hated Nick as much as as the guy
Speaker 1: who is in the Caucasian hot seat, the white Oh
Speaker 1: you guys missed that episode. There was a guy, the
Speaker 1: white guy that was Rachel married to Rachel's sister, sat
Speaker 1: in the Caucasian god that was like the high backed
Speaker 1: chair and they put him in the Caucasian hot seat,
Speaker 1: the ginger who was like so excited, but like but
Speaker 1: like they they those men and Nick's family, whether they're
Speaker 1: married in or are his relatives, they seem like they
Speaker 1: just seem like they're sick of this ship. And now
Speaker 1: he's on dancing with the starts. It's like never ending here, Like, dude,
Speaker 1: please stop exploiting our failure. Dude. The mom's mom's mom.
Speaker 1: She's got to cry for help. She's got a Kate
Speaker 1: Goslin haircut, and she's got a nose Piers. The husband
Speaker 1: doesn't even recognize here. He doesn't know where to look.
Speaker 1: He's a pinball wizard. I think the weed helps his
Speaker 1: eyes relax into place because you can't tell all the time.
Speaker 1: And then in the and then he must have been
Speaker 1: sober and then he can focus. He said he literally
Speaker 1: gave the best piece of advice to Nick, which was
Speaker 1: don't do what you always did. He literally was like,
Speaker 1: this is when we date a strong, you know woman,
Speaker 1: and it doesn't work. And that's why I thought maybe
Speaker 1: he will pick Raven because the father got it head on.
Speaker 1: The Nick seems like, you know a lot of guys
Speaker 1: in their younger twenties, they kind of date crazy girls
Speaker 1: and they date like these people these like and women
Speaker 1: do this too. They date the guy that's unattainable that
Speaker 1: they have to fix, quote like they don't they want
Speaker 1: the challenge. And most people they grow out of that
Speaker 1: at a certain point. But I feel like Nick is
Speaker 1: not growing out of that. Yeah. You know. Ever, while
Speaker 1: I always wanted the guy that didn't like me, you know,
Speaker 1: everybody wanted that. And then I was like, wait, there's
Speaker 1: a really nice guy in front of me that doesn't Yeah,
Speaker 1: let me date him. I'm so hot right now. I
Speaker 1: almost just poured this whole body all over the water,
Speaker 1: and I realized I would have electrocute myself. I actually
Speaker 1: thank for not doing it. I thought, I'm just gonna
Speaker 1: pour this all around. I picked the wrong day to
Speaker 1: wear a wool sweater. It was so chilly the airport
Speaker 1: I just flew in for this podcast. I woke up
Speaker 1: in Florida? Was it was it? A? Um? Was? I am?
Speaker 1: I god of getting text? That's gonna stop nobody? I can't.
Speaker 1: I don't want any outside um? Was? Were there any
Speaker 1: sinkholes in Florida? Not enough to keep me entertained? I'm obsessed.
Speaker 1: I do love a sinkhole. Excited when there was one
Speaker 1: in the valley, I was, I got my phone, was
Speaker 1: like blowing up. No, I just I just you know,
Speaker 1: I drive by every day. It's still you know, they're
Speaker 1: still working on it. It's just crazy. What do people
Speaker 1: do if they live on that street? They just don't
Speaker 1: go the other way. It's sort of like White Street.
Speaker 1: If it's the street I'm thinking of, because I know
Speaker 1: someone lived, I haven't driven down because you can't from
Speaker 1: from the Venturist, from the Laurel Canyon. What the hell
Speaker 1: I'm getting? I think they drive around, they turned around,
Speaker 1: look into that's at a date in the woods was
Speaker 1: they go to Santa's house and she freaks out, and
Speaker 1: then they go and then Santa gives him a carving
Speaker 1: of their face, and then she basically goes and cries
Speaker 1: for two hours. But she's got a great body. And
Speaker 1: it's the worst fucking date of all times. I had
Speaker 1: a fast forward through a part of it. I literally
Speaker 1: was like, I can't take this. Then I thought, you know,
Speaker 1: like the power of editing. Right by the end of
Speaker 1: the Raven date, you're like, he's going to pick raving.
Speaker 1: But then you go back and when even before it
Speaker 1: was announced, when she was having her eightie miltown on
Speaker 1: the couch and he was really spending a lot of
Speaker 1: time like and I was like, oh, you wouldn't spend
Speaker 1: that much. Yeah, he would spend that much time if
Speaker 1: you were going to pick her. He loves a chase.
Speaker 1: And she was the only one. She acted like she
Speaker 1: was the bachelorette. Yeah, and how she kept and I
Speaker 1: don't know if I'm going to say yes, I mean
Speaker 1: that was but the fact that she had that attitude
Speaker 1: and it wasn't like Raven was coming on too strong.
Speaker 1: It wasn't being like Raven just didn't I like you.
Speaker 1: So it was the worst date ever. What do you
Speaker 1: have to say about the worst date ever? It was
Speaker 1: such a bore because she was okay, she was fundering
Speaker 1: the airplane date and she was fun in the ice
Speaker 1: bath like in the world, and this was like a funeral.
Speaker 1: This was I was like, you're so fucking boring. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna this is. They went all right, and they kept
Speaker 1: in the year. They just cried it in a year.
Speaker 1: They just like snuggled. I don't like I had something.
Speaker 1: I was like, did something happen. That's making her cry
Speaker 1: like it was so bad, like also, you can, you can,
Speaker 1: you can everything again. Everything that she was saying was
Speaker 1: completely rational, completely understandable. It's just that like it's a
Speaker 1: game show, it's a dance. She was like, watch she
Speaker 1: wasn't act like you have to spend some rules and
Speaker 1: suspend some belief and like be like, I gotta this
Speaker 1: is what it is. There are a couple of women involved.
Speaker 1: I just gotta jump in. And it was like she
Speaker 1: was going like I don't understand why you need to
Speaker 1: go up with other people like that the show, yes,
Speaker 1: Janner Marine says, and she said this about the about
Speaker 1: the Patriots when they won the Super Bowl over like
Speaker 1: she said, you did it to yourselves, assholes, and she
Speaker 1: did herself as all, you didn't watch that, you didn't
Speaker 1: want sponge. So then we go. So then Raven shows
Speaker 1: up and they have the best day. So the l
Speaker 1: was great and his face looked like an ad for
Speaker 1: an antidepressant beforehand, like you like he was gray, like
Speaker 1: like he actually looked chemically like fucked up, depressed. And
Speaker 1: then they went to sixpence and on the richer kissed
Speaker 1: me ice skating and they were clearly I skating for
Speaker 1: a while because they took their coats off. They were
Speaker 1: soaking wet. He lay you're down on the ice. Loves
Speaker 1: a layer down, layer down. The puppies like, I want
Speaker 1: this today. My friend Mandy was like, you loves animals.
Speaker 1: She's like, this is the best day. I mean, there's
Speaker 1: nothing cutter than a husky puppy. I think there's nothing.
Speaker 1: And then they had a great date in their ere
Speaker 1: She wore a really cute knee highs and uh n
Speaker 1: high boots and a sweaters. But I have to say,
Speaker 1: this is the point where I thought, Okay, it's not
Speaker 1: going to be here because she starts going I think
Speaker 1: it's gonna be me like I think, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: oh shot, they're setting us up. There was no there's
Speaker 1: no challenge, you know, defend a little bit of a
Speaker 1: defense in nick is. You know, sometimes I think it's
Speaker 1: men and women when you have like the sure thing
Speaker 1: in front of you that's like I love you, I'm ready,
Speaker 1: we're gonna do this, and then there is that little
Speaker 1: bit of like a challenge. Now sometimes eventually yeah, but
Speaker 1: if you've known each other like two weeks, yeah, so
Speaker 1: it's like if somebody is like, I will marry you,
Speaker 1: and you're like, like, i'd they actually marry me, and
Speaker 1: they'd expect to get a should do on this, I'd
Speaker 1: be like, I'm not going to marry you, which is
Speaker 1: like kind of a vanest keep saying I'm a realist.
Speaker 1: She's a realist. So I felt like to him it
Speaker 1: felt like more of a real relationship. And actually that's
Speaker 1: a good point. Okay, you know, great, like a good point,
Speaker 1: like maybe he's seen this is like, hey, she might
Speaker 1: be the one. You know, obviously we're engaged, but it's
Speaker 1: more like maybe he thinks, oh, Raven really wants to
Speaker 1: get married, and this is like he's thirty six. So
Speaker 1: he said he said he didn't know if he was
Speaker 1: in love with her. I think that's fair. You can
Speaker 1: love someone and not really be in love. And yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: you're right. When somebody is they just looks so cute
Speaker 1: together and so light and fun. And then we got,
Speaker 1: you know, saggy bottom and give me your diary. So
Speaker 1: then they go and he proposes and Raven leaves her cloak.
Speaker 1: Yeah she and I was like, Vanessa's going to see
Speaker 1: the jacket. Yeahs. And they even left her coat. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and like after he said no, he like walked out
Speaker 1: the side door, and I was like, she must be called.
Speaker 1: First of all, I was like very worried about her.
Speaker 1: They stuck them. And then Ding Dung shows up looking
Speaker 1: like Dynasty. Yeah, and then and then van fucking styles
Speaker 1: Joan and I go back really quick because when he
Speaker 1: was dumping Raven, first all, why did she say her
Speaker 1: whole speech? Because he should have stopped her. So mad
Speaker 1: at Caitlin for letting him the speech, and I was like,
Speaker 1: I guess the producers make them. But he since he
Speaker 1: got so mad about that, I was like, he could
Speaker 1: have been like, no, I'm not fucking doing that, Like
Speaker 1: I'm not going to make her say this whole spiel.
Speaker 1: And Vanessa didn't say anything. Yeah, But I loved when
Speaker 1: he said I'll miss you because I know, I know, Yeah,
Speaker 1: It's like, yo, you're gonna be fine, Like she's going
Speaker 1: to be fine, Like I would love for her, and
Speaker 1: James Taylor would be a great I bet there's a
Speaker 1: lot of guys going for Raven. No, James Taylor, Raven.
Speaker 1: If you're listening to yeah, we know you're listening. Of
Speaker 1: course you're obviously listening. Your four spirit animals are telling
Speaker 1: you listening. He might be listening. Yeah, um country, Like
Speaker 1: I'll text him. I'll text him and tell him to listen.
Speaker 1: They would be so cute together. James Taylor did he
Speaker 1: have did he he wants to go on b I
Speaker 1: p to meter? Yeah? He said, okay, wait a minute,
Speaker 1: he should absolutely go there. I mean, he was such
Speaker 1: a favorite. Everyone loves he was great. I actually liked
Speaker 1: him after the show. I didn't love him on the show,
Speaker 1: but after the show, remember when we were listening around
Speaker 1: and I was like, where who is where is the Yes,
Speaker 1: He's so charming and great energy. He was just super cute.
Speaker 1: That's why I felt Danielle the neo natalers and person,
Speaker 1: she was funny. Well, I mean they're they're nurse is
Speaker 1: like five she had like five solid singers and she's
Speaker 1: a real nurse. And then also don't do nursing. Also
Speaker 1: the editor film she saved four babies were like the
Speaker 1: other one like, I don't know if everybody else you know,
Speaker 1: like she doesn't you know? Okay, so what if we
Speaker 1: meet that one? Be like she's a real dolphin's she's
Speaker 1: just a real real estate intern. She's a real aspiring
Speaker 1: dolphin trainer. Okay, wait a minute. So then so then
Speaker 1: they getting gay, Oh my god, the corpse and setting
Speaker 1: I'm going to go with him for Halloween. Oh my god.
Speaker 1: Ye have a box of rings and a lot of tanner.
Speaker 1: It could just be ring pops. Oh my god, ring pops,
Speaker 1: Ring pops, Ring pops. We should bring rain and I
Speaker 1: go with your assistant sales. We should bring ring pops
Speaker 1: to the podcasts. And like gummy roses? Do they sound
Speaker 1: like gummy roses? Do they really feel like jelly belly?
Speaker 1: Use make gummy? Yes? That thing when I was a kid. Okay,
Speaker 1: I want to find so get the the cornlane. So
Speaker 1: then we get to the okay, so then they get
Speaker 1: engaged with the after the rose. So then they after
Speaker 1: the rose. Did you guys feel, by the way, what
Speaker 1: did you think? Like did you I felt when the
Speaker 1: choe gets out of the limo door? Were you studying
Speaker 1: their dresses and their shoes? And I was like, has
Speaker 1: it ever switched? Like maybe stack in the day they
Speaker 1: used to say they need to switch it up. Now
Speaker 1: you got it's hard for when like yeah, say yes,
Speaker 1: and they'd be like, hold on, I gotta break up
Speaker 1: with the is if your first you're not, you're but
Speaker 1: it used to be that they yeah, there are a
Speaker 1: couple where they switched it. So he said, it's awesome,
Speaker 1: Like I really want to say, like, Graven looks so
Speaker 1: cute and a little white dressed in her hooded cape,
Speaker 1: and Vanessa looked like Joan Collins and even in the
Speaker 1: even in the after the Rose thing, her dress choices,
Speaker 1: it's like she's so sexy. It's like, what are there's
Speaker 1: nineteen eighties, like nineteen early nineties, like weird strap contraptions,
Speaker 1: they're they're there. It's it's making her look like, first
Speaker 1: of all, not that fun and older because she's so hot.
Speaker 1: She just's like a fun, hip, you know, designer because
Speaker 1: you know, her personal energy is really john because she's
Speaker 1: you know, she's stunning. She literally is absolutely perfect. She's perfect. Okay.
Speaker 1: So then so then we're at after the Rose. Right
Speaker 1: after the Rose, Raven comes out. She was so elegant.
Speaker 1: She didn't trash him at all. And then I loved
Speaker 1: how like on on on her Instagram account, she like
Speaker 1: just posted about the dress she wore and like why
Speaker 1: she wore and equality and like and like promoting the
Speaker 1: quality which her town, which I read upon was one
Speaker 1: of the first towns to uh to to to push
Speaker 1: for integration and schools, and I was like, that is
Speaker 1: so cool. She was so well spoken and she was
Speaker 1: so sweet. The ultimate difference. It feels like Raven thinks
Speaker 1: outside of herself, yeah, and bigger issues and it comes
Speaker 1: from like a real pure, like sweet place. And Vanessa
Speaker 1: to me feels like it's all about Vanessa, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean. Like Raven's dad having cancer, A lot
Speaker 1: of people like how that happened with what's his face?
Speaker 1: His parents got divorced, and he acted like the world
Speaker 1: had ended. They all made these things that happened in
Speaker 1: their families about them, and she didn't. She's like, my
Speaker 1: dad has cancer. It's really terrible. I worry for him.
Speaker 1: I worry for my family. You know it. We can
Speaker 1: all take away. Yeah, life happens, but you don't need
Speaker 1: to like make it all about yours. Yeah. So then
Speaker 1: Aaron just pulled her lip and thought, I Like, I
Speaker 1: just was just thinking how she just like, I just
Speaker 1: love her and she's just fantastic. When she posted that
Speaker 1: thing about her hometown on Instagram, I think you sent
Speaker 1: it to me. This is amazing because I think she's
Speaker 1: really like from her first are everybody's first impression of
Speaker 1: Raven to the very end was unbelievable. We had Vagina
Speaker 1: shoe to now it's like, wow, yeah, that gives two
Speaker 1: finger blasts from I give this, I give this bachelor.
Speaker 1: I give it five ships like pies. Can I tell
Speaker 1: you just saying that somebody has mailed a package hashtag
Speaker 1: bones on and the falcon and that I know what
Speaker 1: they're talking about, and I'm like, yes, this person gets me,
Speaker 1: Rihanna gets me. The fact that Rihanna sent me a
Speaker 1: box with goblets, I love it so much art and
Speaker 1: I just can I just pause and say, I'm so
Speaker 1: proud of you, God, thank you. I just think about her,
Speaker 1: just you coming over in our little dinky, and you
Speaker 1: have taken this on like like a falcon, if like
Speaker 1: a phene rising. I truly, I actually blossomed into a chap.
Speaker 1: I actually want you all to know. And I hope
Speaker 1: this doesn't happen. But if I have like a brainy
Speaker 1: aneurysm or something, because it's the only way to go, truly,
Speaker 1: and it's got to be my sleep, I don't want
Speaker 1: to be driving and aware that is happening, and I
Speaker 1: want to be like, oh this is Orlando Bloom. I
Speaker 1: can't kiss you on this pony, you know, Like so
Speaker 1: that's yeah, yeah, so let's just say that happens. I
Speaker 1: want everyone to know. Well, well, I'm not happy about it,
Speaker 1: like I do feel that my life's work has been fulfilled,
Speaker 1: like just receiving this goblet with hashtag Bonzone and the artwork,
Speaker 1: the fan art from Shell and Pony will fucking cut you. Yes,
Speaker 1: I truly And you know what, I can't die until
Speaker 1: after May seventh. Good, you're planning on murdering me? May
Speaker 1: I need to full still the podcast, the live show.
Speaker 1: I need to party like it's nineteen eighty nine. That's
Speaker 1: how the song goes right in Nashville with all once Katie,
Speaker 1: Katie will take a Bonanza bus that we've gotta get
Speaker 1: Katie there. If you get in a bus now, if
Speaker 1: you can where Katie makes it to Nashville. She does,
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I want to go back to the
Speaker 1: Romper store and see are in action? Oh my god,
Speaker 1: do you want to go to the Romper store? Yes? Okay,
Speaker 1: I want her to be like what size of you?
Speaker 1: I will eat your face off, don't try to woom
Speaker 1: me with your finger blast and then you're you going
Speaker 1: to change the room and you're like, I'm ready for
Speaker 1: my finger last. Yeah, get in here, Darline. I don't know,
Speaker 1: it's been hard lately in there. I don't know if
Speaker 1: this romper, this onesie fits properly in the in scene.
Speaker 1: Can you help me find out? You'll know it's my
Speaker 1: room because I got the curtain open, I got a
Speaker 1: lodge undercarriage. Let's do this, dolline and tone Darlene so so,
Speaker 1: then out comes Vanessa at after the Rose and boy
Speaker 1: did the the still shots on Twitter? Per fucking face z.
Speaker 1: They hate each other. Can't even fake it, can't. The
Speaker 1: thing about that was that shelling Pony was in the ground.
Speaker 1: He was there, and I didn't see him, did you guys?
Speaker 1: Did I see the hay that was under his feet?
Speaker 1: It was probably him up on the chair. Listen. He's
Speaker 1: a tiny little fellow. I'm sure he's got magical powers.
Speaker 1: It just he wasn't. He was sitting on Hey, it's
Speaker 1: so concerned with his sister's love life. She couldn't stop
Speaker 1: calling them out, like we get it. You love your family?
Speaker 1: Oh my God loves her like loves like, you know,
Speaker 1: her personal protector. If I had my entire extended family,
Speaker 1: they'd be like I didn't know they made torso so
Speaker 1: long and limbs so short, and I didn't know that
Speaker 1: generations could get shorter each Like, aren't you supposed to
Speaker 1: get tolerate generation like you shrink each each round. We're
Speaker 1: like Russian nesting dolls, with the current generation as the
Speaker 1: inside doll. The smallest. My great grandfather was like six six.
Speaker 1: We get short, we are we are a weak species.
Speaker 1: And John Cena needs to be there. Oh my god.
Speaker 1: I love John Cina. I worked with him on my TV.
Speaker 1: He's huge hands. I just you have to do that
Speaker 1: show with him. I wrote a show it's so funny.
Speaker 1: I need to do a show where I played my
Speaker 1: best friend and John an. I need to get that
Speaker 1: to him. It's so funny, man, you know what. I
Speaker 1: should get that to him. What's happening? Yeah, can you
Speaker 1: think about your entire like my mom, my mom, her
Speaker 1: face would just be like she would just be doing
Speaker 1: the I can't like. She just would be nodding like
Speaker 1: I can't believe this is your life choice. Dude. I
Speaker 1: want you to know that looking at pictures of them
Speaker 1: on each other's instinct um if they wait. So you know,
Speaker 1: I'm cheering, like, you know, I hopeless romantic. I'm cheering
Speaker 1: for them. But I and and you know, in some
Speaker 1: ways they both had very true dating comments. You know,
Speaker 1: it's just that she just they hate each other. She
Speaker 1: just I think it's a it's a it's a She's
Speaker 1: got a lot of good qualities, but I think she
Speaker 1: falls into that category of hard to date, just hard
Speaker 1: to date, not fun. Yeah, she's no so serious. But
Speaker 1: so him. Can I he looked exhausted, but what he
Speaker 1: probably was dancing? Can I confess something? Please? Well, first
Speaker 1: of all, did you guys see the ads for his
Speaker 1: stupid He just like happily he thought this and they're
Speaker 1: not good. It's not it's like it's not good. Hopefully
Speaker 1: he'll get canned. I'm going to watch it tonight. We
Speaker 1: need to do we need to do an episode at
Speaker 1: some point. Yeah, if nothing else, just because I'm going
Speaker 1: to miss this, I tip tweet to us if you
Speaker 1: want us to do one about dancing with I'm cheering
Speaker 1: for Sean Jennings. I wanted to say that the other
Speaker 1: thing that happened on the finale. So you So while
Speaker 1: we're watching, I'm like a half an hour behind, and
Speaker 1: Arden's like yeah. So Arton's like, if anybody gets to
Speaker 1: a commercial, called Rob and I was like, I didn't
Speaker 1: know exactly what she meantioned like, just let me know
Speaker 1: when you're at a commercial, and I was like, maybe
Speaker 1: our needs something. I'm in a stopping place my phone ring.
Speaker 1: She's like, okay, I said to talk about because I
Speaker 1: saw two hours before you guys, I had East Coast
Speaker 1: and I was on a delay. It was Rachel's I
Speaker 1: had to call roll it. So I called Rob and
Speaker 1: I said, and I said, you're like the first guy,
Speaker 1: the first white guy. The black guys seemed pretty cool.
Speaker 1: The first white guy, see is definitely gay, that's what
Speaker 1: you thought. And then the second one, You're like, he
Speaker 1: hopes his mouth, okay, seems like enough, and then he says, Rachel,
Speaker 1: I want you to know I ready to go black
Speaker 1: and never go back kidding. I didn't see anyone after that.
Speaker 1: I couldn't. I was last. I couldn't even see the
Speaker 1: last guy because I was in a Marriott and I
Speaker 1: couldn't pause anything, and so I was so busy going, oh,
Speaker 1: I got like texting, keep trying to find somebody on
Speaker 1: the East coast, like because you guys hadn't seen it yet. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was no And then I watched it. It It was
Speaker 1: as horrible as you said, and you know, Harden was
Speaker 1: saying like you know that Rachel afterwards, like to the producer,
Speaker 1: She's like, okay, listen, like, yeah, you know me, I'm
Speaker 1: a hot lawyer. You need to get me a better guy. Yeah,
Speaker 1: these guys are like spring Break. How many honests got
Speaker 1: after four? Okay, so after Black Never Go Back, there's
Speaker 1: one more black guy. Okay. Yeah, the black is really
Speaker 1: cute and seem cool, but like, we don't want it
Speaker 1: to be a season of that four four, which are
Speaker 1: those guys just like not going to get out of
Speaker 1: so they just won't go out and let those already
Speaker 1: be in the house. I mean, I think they might
Speaker 1: get it again, and she just sa can we vote
Speaker 1: to just just write them out right now? But Black
Speaker 1: Can Never Go back? Who says that I was on
Speaker 1: TV in front of a crowd I want I wanted
Speaker 1: to kill myself. I was so uncomfortable. Everyone was just
Speaker 1: kind of like huh. And then I thought he was
Speaker 1: going to look at the camera and be like five
Speaker 1: sick forever. Yeah, she had to like humor him and
Speaker 1: be like, oh, like, oh I think you're fucking pretty. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I hated him and I love you. Yeah, don't just
Speaker 1: can you imagine? I mean that's the thing. It's like
Speaker 1: you have one like you have two white guys. One
Speaker 1: is gay and the other one mentions her black, like
Speaker 1: are you like it was like playing like didn't abc
Speaker 1: vet what he was going to say, and they were
Speaker 1: cool with that, like they wanted that, Like how is
Speaker 1: that okay? He might have been fed the line, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean, Like you could have been out
Speaker 1: the line. He probably was just to just to like
Speaker 1: make it. Why did you feed him that line? Well?
Speaker 1: I just thought he called me and he was like
Speaker 1: I'm panicking. I'm like, go with the black thing. People
Speaker 1: are gonna go crazy for it, love it. Yeah. The
Speaker 1: thing is he's going to be on the show fast
Speaker 1: forward a year from now and be like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: he's so great. You you just you took on the
Speaker 1: race relationships just immediately, and so we're not here. So
Speaker 1: it sounds I know, because I'm freak that Rachel doesn't
Speaker 1: start till the end of May, like and then and
Speaker 1: then so b I P is until the summer, right,
Speaker 1: the i P is until the summer because we have
Speaker 1: to get her cast offs. So it's like, you guys, like,
Speaker 1: this is it for us until the You guys just
Speaker 1: have to America. You need to fucking get credit card,
Speaker 1: debt and just come to Nashville. You've got a Zanes
Speaker 1: Nashville May seven. This is seven o'clock. Get card. But
Speaker 1: also I think, well, well, at some point there will
Speaker 1: be like more Vanessa Nick news, like for sure, because
Speaker 1: she musically was dreaming on national television. Just like I
Speaker 1: just want to be in the same car with them.
Speaker 1: I just want to be in a car like, oh
Speaker 1: my god, the other So I feel like this this impending.
Speaker 1: We can go on the streets of l A and
Speaker 1: look for her because we know she's probably here. Because
Speaker 1: she's here, he's competing here. Do you is that live?
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, Dance with the Stars live like they're doing
Speaker 1: it right now? I think it, yes, East Coast, But
Speaker 1: then they have like you can call in, they have
Speaker 1: like West Coast times because my mom would watch and
Speaker 1: she'd be like, call in and vote for this. I
Speaker 1: mean like right now in l A they're doing the show. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I didn't know if it was two months ago. It's
Speaker 1: like American Idol. So wrapping up the season. This was
Speaker 1: a really disappointing season. I mean, I really love my Hope.
Speaker 1: I felt very proud of us as a pot. I
Speaker 1: had a great time. I think the podcast has really too.
Speaker 1: I really appreciated all the fan art Casey run In
Speaker 1: the painting, that painting and all of all of the
Speaker 1: I definitely come I'm sorry. I had more fun on
Speaker 1: the podcast and watching the Yeah, for sure. The show
Speaker 1: really like really like like the ship hit the fan
Speaker 1: when they pre announced Rachel and there's real it really
Speaker 1: was so I mean Karin was like the most entertaining
Speaker 1: then you got so sick of her, and then all
Speaker 1: of a sudden, Rachel we knew, and we were like
Speaker 1: the Nick became the same Nick, and he didn't seem
Speaker 1: to really he just seemed to want to be on TV.
Speaker 1: She was announced, and then there were like two other
Speaker 1: episodes Yeah, I guess because they were how can you
Speaker 1: find a gay guy in Hollywood? Just send out as
Speaker 1: her bed fend like like it's like they felt they
Speaker 1: announced early to get those four guys. Are you kidding me?
Speaker 1: I know it, just it felt very produced and a
Speaker 1: bit lazy. He didn't see that anywhere. Like I like
Speaker 1: the Denmark, I like the cold Weather, I like the finale. Um,
Speaker 1: I can't wait for Rachel. We guys do a fine
Speaker 1: tweet of the week. Oh by the way, oh my god, Paget,
Speaker 1: we are we are missing you right now. We are
Speaker 1: missing you hard hard. We are missing you so fucking hard.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, Aaron, how much do you love Paget?
Speaker 1: You love her? Right? Okay? Wait, I want to say that.
Speaker 1: I also wanted to say I appreciated everybody. Um, everybody
Speaker 1: sending hold on That was not it? This is okay.
Speaker 1: So today you guys liking us on iTunes is I
Speaker 1: really I appreciate it, and you guys have been doing
Speaker 1: it and we had some nice comments we have. I'm
Speaker 1: a hoy sailor. Will you accept these stars five Stars
Speaker 1: my favorite podcast that recaps the Bachelor franchise in the
Speaker 1: most hilarious way. I will gladly accept your Rose five
Speaker 1: Stars by send. I watched The Bachelor when it first
Speaker 1: came out, but totally fell off for a while, only
Speaker 1: got back into it due to friends making a fantasy
Speaker 1: league and I felt like being informed about who I
Speaker 1: was drafting. This pod is hilarious. Too many times I've
Speaker 1: been afraid I will actually pee myself at work from laughing.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for making office work ten times
Speaker 1: more entertaining and informative. Ready for b I P. So
Speaker 1: thank you so much. We appreciate it. Email us at
Speaker 1: Rose podcast at gmail dot com. You guys, we're going
Speaker 1: to Nashville. Katie's gonna start hitchhiking. Now, Katie, let's start walking.
Speaker 1: I've I've already visualized from I'm gonna make a visions
Speaker 1: Arden's announcement throughout the rest of the pocket. You're going
Speaker 1: to be there. I think you're gonna have there. I
Speaker 1: think somebody's got twenty miles in America. So here's here's
Speaker 1: a final day of the land. Should should I do
Speaker 1: it over? Our Spirit Airline has a deal for sixteen years.
Speaker 1: He's gonna be there. Here's the final line up seven Sunday,
Speaker 1: May seven. Um, it's supposed to be an hour and
Speaker 1: a half, but I think we'll probably like seven hours.
Speaker 1: I can't figure out how to work it up. Let
Speaker 1: me ask you this I guess I could do this afterwards.
Speaker 1: Please send me pictures. I can't even handle it. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna get to work on a Westworld since version of myself.
Speaker 1: So we could only have like so many people on
Speaker 1: stage at one. So the people from the pod are
Speaker 1: me and Miss Aaron and our Secretary of State Paget
Speaker 1: and Steve Heightener, who's Kenny Baniah who's going to try
Speaker 1: to funk Wells as sisters while he's there. So then
Speaker 1: we have Wills and his sisters. That'll be one segment
Speaker 1: with Heightner. We have Luke the Cowboy. We have Luke
Speaker 1: I'm We have James Taylor, Katie's future boyfriend, sorry, current boyfriend.
Speaker 1: We have Carly and Evan, who I feel like might
Speaker 1: bail on us. They're like, they're harder to get in touch,
Speaker 1: right kids and they have kids. He's he's a dick,
Speaker 1: he's the dick doctor, so he's busy. He's got penises
Speaker 1: to fix. There's six and then we have we have
Speaker 1: Dan Yelled, the neo natal nurse, and then we that's
Speaker 1: like a hot lineup, you guys. It's a great I
Speaker 1: can't figure out how many people to have on stage,
Speaker 1: and we might have to tag out us and maybe pair,
Speaker 1: like figure out who each person's dream person to interview,
Speaker 1: Like you get one person page. I guess one person
Speaker 1: because I don't know how much of a clusterfu. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like there could only be so many people on stage,
Speaker 1: So we'll figure out what I do A calling interview
Speaker 1: with Haley. Everyone come up one at the time. Yeah,
Speaker 1: there will still be like five to one or six
Speaker 1: to one. I don't know. I don't know just time wise,
Speaker 1: I've been trust me, I've literally lost some sleep trying.
Speaker 1: I think you need it. I think I timer Yah,
Speaker 1: I will have time to do this. We did this
Speaker 1: on like you made it weird. We can talk about
Speaker 1: this after that. Okay, okay, all right, you guys. All
Speaker 1: we know is at some point it'll be figured out.
Speaker 1: It'll be a fucking hot mess. James Taylor has agreed
Speaker 1: to learn our theme song and let me do the
Speaker 1: sounds of the backup singing, like the grunting. He agreed
Speaker 1: to sing it, and then I'm going to do backup grunt. Okay,
Speaker 1: I really need to go their place, help me. Are
Speaker 1: you kidding? Gonna fire it out? We're going to figure
Speaker 1: it out. So you guys Thank you so so glad
Speaker 1: he doesn't listen, sir. Thank you so much everyone for
Speaker 1: making this was season three. Will you accept it? You guys?
Speaker 1: Truly it is my favorite thing that I do. And
Speaker 1: when I get a brain in yourysm a A, I
Speaker 1: just want everyone to know that, Like truly, I feel
Speaker 1: that my purpose has been fulfilled. You're not gonna get
Speaker 1: a brain anurism, but if I did, I'm not happy
Speaker 1: about it. Kill you, but my word work, There's more
Speaker 1: work to be done. One of my favorite parts is
Speaker 1: getting to know you better. Rob. I'm really when I
Speaker 1: didn't tell me you weren't coming out was I was heartbroken.
Speaker 1: I was like, what do you mean? I don't know?
Speaker 1: Can I play this lot? You're glue? I know, I
Speaker 1: know I'll be there in spirit. It's not playing Mark
Speaker 1: Rivers Magical Mark Rivers Our Musical. Oh my god, let's
Speaker 1: just listen to it and sing, w well. Will you
Speaker 1: accept this road that's cat to accept this role into
Speaker 1: your bones on into your robber area? Oh? I'm sorry
Speaker 1: I took that curious. I will cut you if you
Speaker 1: don't accept this? Will you accept this shelling pony into
Speaker 1: your fermonda? Where are you looking Nick's dad. Where are
Speaker 1: you looking at bye now leaving notice dot com