1
00:00:00,440 --> 00:00:02,280
Speaker 1: All right, ladies and gentlemen, it is time for the

2
00:00:02,320 --> 00:00:06,600
Speaker 1: strawberry Leator with my good print. Thank you Junior. A

3
00:00:06,720 --> 00:00:12,160
Speaker 1: subject my man is too gentle and loving. Dear Stephen Shirley.

4
00:00:12,320 --> 00:00:14,680
Speaker 1: I am a thirty six year old female in a

5
00:00:14,760 --> 00:00:18,759
Speaker 1: long distance relationship with a man and his early forties.

6
00:00:19,239 --> 00:00:22,680
Speaker 1: Things are good between us, and honestly, I am ready

7
00:00:22,680 --> 00:00:25,560
Speaker 1: to take things to the next level. I only have

8
00:00:25,800 --> 00:00:28,960
Speaker 1: one problem, and I'm hesitant to move on to move

9
00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:32,360
Speaker 1: to his hometown if he can't fix the problem. We

10
00:00:32,479 --> 00:00:35,320
Speaker 1: have been in a committed relationship for two years and

11
00:00:35,440 --> 00:00:38,840
Speaker 1: when we are intimate, he is very gentle and loving.

12
00:00:38,960 --> 00:00:42,279
Speaker 1: In the bedroom, he has kept his same routine the

13
00:00:42,520 --> 00:00:46,480
Speaker 1: entire time. He does not do anything freaky or exotic,

14
00:00:46,760 --> 00:00:51,720
Speaker 1: and he's very passionate. At first, it was okay he

15
00:00:51,800 --> 00:00:55,000
Speaker 1: was clearly taking his time to please me, but now

16
00:00:55,120 --> 00:00:58,560
Speaker 1: I need him to do more. My sexual desires have

17
00:00:58,640 --> 00:01:01,960
Speaker 1: changed in my late thirty and I became more in

18
00:01:02,080 --> 00:01:04,880
Speaker 1: sync with my body. I want to have sex and

19
00:01:04,959 --> 00:01:08,000
Speaker 1: other places besides the bed, and I needed to be

20
00:01:08,040 --> 00:01:11,000
Speaker 1: a little kinky at times. How do I tell him

21
00:01:11,120 --> 00:01:13,720
Speaker 1: he is not giving me enough sex and that he

22
00:01:13,840 --> 00:01:17,800
Speaker 1: is pretty boring? In the bedroom. I know this is

23
00:01:17,800 --> 00:01:20,600
Speaker 1: a conversation that I must have with him, but I

24
00:01:20,640 --> 00:01:23,959
Speaker 1: am honestly unsure how to tell him this. I don't

25
00:01:23,959 --> 00:01:26,600
Speaker 1: want to turn him off and appear to be a

26
00:01:26,600 --> 00:01:29,399
Speaker 1: little freak to him, but I am tired of straight

27
00:01:29,440 --> 00:01:32,360
Speaker 1: love making every time. I have a good thing going

28
00:01:32,400 --> 00:01:34,680
Speaker 1: with this man, and I don't want to ruin it.

29
00:01:34,959 --> 00:01:37,600
Speaker 1: I'm also scared that this may be all he has

30
00:01:37,640 --> 00:01:40,600
Speaker 1: to offer, or all he knows how to do. I

31
00:01:40,640 --> 00:01:44,360
Speaker 1: am not the type to cheat, but I am craving satisfaction.

32
00:01:44,920 --> 00:01:49,480
Speaker 1: Can you guys relate? Please give me some pointers. What

33
00:01:49,520 --> 00:01:56,080
Speaker 1: do you mean can we relate? Well, yes, of course

34
00:01:56,160 --> 00:01:58,840
Speaker 1: I can relate it. Yeah, if this is your concern,

35
00:01:58,960 --> 00:02:01,320
Speaker 1: that's what we're here for. Try to help you for sure,

36
00:02:02,440 --> 00:02:04,919
Speaker 1: you know, I just know that there are so many people,

37
00:02:05,080 --> 00:02:08,000
Speaker 1: especially women, who would love to be in your shoes.

38
00:02:08,080 --> 00:02:11,560
Speaker 1: Right now. You have a man who is gentle and loving,

39
00:02:11,720 --> 00:02:14,600
Speaker 1: and you say he's very passionate. I mean some people

40
00:02:14,639 --> 00:02:18,200
Speaker 1: would just stop right there, but no, not you. That

41
00:02:18,240 --> 00:02:20,760
Speaker 1: would be cool with them, but that's not what you want.

42
00:02:21,080 --> 00:02:24,880
Speaker 1: And you want what you want and guess what that is? Okay, too,

43
00:02:25,360 --> 00:02:29,720
Speaker 1: So you ask, how do you tell him. How do

44
00:02:29,800 --> 00:02:33,800
Speaker 1: you tell him. You're gonna have to tell him, you

45
00:02:33,840 --> 00:02:36,280
Speaker 1: do know that, because you don't want to cheat, like

46
00:02:36,320 --> 00:02:39,880
Speaker 1: you say, and you want other things to go down.

47
00:02:39,960 --> 00:02:43,120
Speaker 1: You want it to happen other places. I suggest that

48
00:02:43,160 --> 00:02:46,160
Speaker 1: you tell him nicely. I suggest that you tell him

49
00:02:46,200 --> 00:02:49,120
Speaker 1: away from the bedroom, like maybe you know, when you

50
00:02:49,120 --> 00:02:53,080
Speaker 1: guys are just having a conversation, you can just bring

51
00:02:53,120 --> 00:02:56,519
Speaker 1: it up in a nice way, or you know, if

52
00:02:56,520 --> 00:02:59,280
Speaker 1: that doesn't work, you can start showing him or you know,

53
00:02:59,360 --> 00:03:01,359
Speaker 1: I like it this swear, I like it that way

54
00:03:01,440 --> 00:03:05,200
Speaker 1: or something like that. You know, will you take the

55
00:03:05,280 --> 00:03:08,320
Speaker 1: risk of him judging you? You? Maybe you maybe will,

56
00:03:08,360 --> 00:03:12,120
Speaker 1: who knows. But you want what you want. You know

57
00:03:12,840 --> 00:03:14,880
Speaker 1: you want to do it, where you want to do it,

58
00:03:14,919 --> 00:03:16,320
Speaker 1: and how you want to do it, and you have

59
00:03:16,440 --> 00:03:19,360
Speaker 1: that right, So you gotta be woman enough and strong

60
00:03:19,480 --> 00:03:21,440
Speaker 1: enough to tell him. I just say, tell him in

61
00:03:21,440 --> 00:03:24,079
Speaker 1: a nice way. And if you can't tell him, then

62
00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:26,480
Speaker 1: you have to show him. But I would take it.

63
00:03:26,840 --> 00:03:29,160
Speaker 1: Maybe if you want to tell him in a conversation

64
00:03:29,520 --> 00:03:33,680
Speaker 1: away from the bedroom and just a regular normal conversation,

65
00:03:33,760 --> 00:03:40,560
Speaker 1: maybe at dinner, Steve Well, yeah, YadA, YadA, YadA. Shelley

66
00:03:40,760 --> 00:03:43,960
Speaker 1: that's nice answer. All that's good. My man is too

67
00:03:44,040 --> 00:03:48,320
Speaker 1: gentle and love it. Thirty six year old woman in

68
00:03:48,360 --> 00:03:51,920
Speaker 1: this long dist relationship with a man in his early forties.

69
00:03:52,360 --> 00:03:55,800
Speaker 1: Things is good and she ready to take things to

70
00:03:55,880 --> 00:03:59,920
Speaker 1: the next level. Only got one problem. She's hesitant to

71
00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:03,640
Speaker 1: move to the man's hometown if he can't fix this problem. Well,

72
00:04:03,680 --> 00:04:06,280
Speaker 1: they're in this committee relationship, y'all for two years, and

73
00:04:06,360 --> 00:04:12,200
Speaker 1: when they intimate, he's very gentle and loving. In the bedroom,

74
00:04:12,240 --> 00:04:15,640
Speaker 1: he's kept the same routine every time. That means she's

75
00:04:15,640 --> 00:04:19,920
Speaker 1: getting bored. He does not do anything freaky or exotic,

76
00:04:20,800 --> 00:04:23,680
Speaker 1: but he's very passionate. At first, it was okay, clearly

77
00:04:23,720 --> 00:04:27,200
Speaker 1: taking his time to please me, but now I need

78
00:04:27,279 --> 00:04:30,120
Speaker 1: him to do more. This woman says her sexual desires

79
00:04:30,120 --> 00:04:33,560
Speaker 1: are changed in her late thirties and she became more

80
00:04:33,560 --> 00:04:36,159
Speaker 1: in sync with her body. I want to have sex

81
00:04:36,160 --> 00:04:40,880
Speaker 1: in other places beside the bedroom, and I need to

82
00:04:40,920 --> 00:04:43,680
Speaker 1: be a little kinky at times. How do I tell

83
00:04:43,800 --> 00:04:47,640
Speaker 1: him he ain't giving me enough sex and that he

84
00:04:47,800 --> 00:04:50,680
Speaker 1: bored in this bed room? I know I gotta have

85
00:04:50,839 --> 00:04:52,880
Speaker 1: this conversation. I don't want to turn him off. I

86
00:04:52,880 --> 00:04:56,080
Speaker 1: don't want to ruin it. I'm also be scared that

87
00:04:56,160 --> 00:04:59,279
Speaker 1: this has to be his best offer. That's all he knows.

88
00:05:00,440 --> 00:05:02,240
Speaker 1: And you know I ain't to type the cheat, but

89
00:05:02,279 --> 00:05:05,240
Speaker 1: I need some help there here I come. You want

90
00:05:05,240 --> 00:05:08,359
Speaker 1: to have sex in different places, and you want it

91
00:05:08,400 --> 00:05:12,360
Speaker 1: to be a little kinky. Sometimes you can't tell me.

92
00:05:13,920 --> 00:05:17,280
Speaker 1: You just have to do it, like y'all going to

93
00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:20,960
Speaker 1: the bedroom in the same place, same bed, He walking there,

94
00:05:22,560 --> 00:05:26,799
Speaker 1: What does she do? You know, you gotta just create opportunity.

95
00:05:27,080 --> 00:05:29,320
Speaker 1: He walk in the bed room, he naked. He don't

96
00:05:29,360 --> 00:05:33,640
Speaker 1: see you in that baby? What where are you at? Then?

97
00:05:33,720 --> 00:05:40,800
Speaker 1: You hollow? I'm out here, you're out here? Well, look

98
00:05:40,880 --> 00:05:48,760
Speaker 1: out the window and your answer that naked in the tree.

99
00:05:49,080 --> 00:05:55,360
Speaker 1: You got to get him out of his comfort zone. Baby, Baby,

100
00:05:55,400 --> 00:06:00,320
Speaker 1: where you're at? I'm done here in the kitchen. Half

101
00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:05,760
Speaker 1: for me is in the refrigerator, and that will cause

102
00:06:06,000 --> 00:06:09,039
Speaker 1: him to know that we want when we come back,

103
00:06:09,120 --> 00:06:12,920
Speaker 1: I'll have several scenarios that you can create to give

104
00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:17,960
Speaker 1: him out the bedroom and put more spice in your love. Like, well,

105
00:06:18,040 --> 00:06:22,240
Speaker 1: see what we found is this woman's having this boring

106
00:06:22,360 --> 00:06:24,919
Speaker 1: sexual relationship with this man and she won't more. She

107
00:06:25,000 --> 00:06:27,800
Speaker 1: wanted in more than one place. And she wanted to

108
00:06:27,800 --> 00:06:30,800
Speaker 1: be more exotic, and she wanted to be a little kinky.

109
00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:33,200
Speaker 1: She don't know how to tell the man because she

110
00:06:33,240 --> 00:06:35,640
Speaker 1: don't want to hurt it. She's afraid that this may

111
00:06:35,720 --> 00:06:38,520
Speaker 1: be more. Well, you gotta elevate the man's thinking. Like

112
00:06:38,600 --> 00:06:44,719
Speaker 1: I said before, you gotta do some stuff outside. You

113
00:06:44,880 --> 00:06:51,840
Speaker 1: in a tree. I'm down here. Half of me is

114
00:06:51,880 --> 00:06:55,920
Speaker 1: in the refrigerator. I ain't saying one half I need

115
00:06:55,920 --> 00:06:59,200
Speaker 1: to half sitting in refrigerator, but trying to get him

116
00:06:59,200 --> 00:07:04,400
Speaker 1: the baby. Where you at? I'm down here, been overlooking

117
00:07:04,440 --> 00:07:09,400
Speaker 1: for changing the cushions. So you gotta get him out

118
00:07:09,440 --> 00:07:16,840
Speaker 1: the bedroom? Yeah, right right, baby, I'm naked. I'm looking

119
00:07:16,880 --> 00:07:18,880
Speaker 1: for you. You ain't in the bedroom. I'm in the

120
00:07:18,960 --> 00:07:26,440
Speaker 1: living room, Paul dancing. See you gonna get him? Stand up?

121
00:07:27,680 --> 00:07:31,760
Speaker 1: You know, baby, baby, I just got out the shower.

122
00:07:31,760 --> 00:07:36,320
Speaker 1: Where you're at, I'm in the basement spanking myself, not

123
00:07:36,480 --> 00:07:45,360
Speaker 1: yourself now. Yeah, you gotta get his mind get yeah, yeah, yeah, baby, baby,

124
00:07:45,400 --> 00:07:48,120
Speaker 1: where you at? I'm looking for you. I'm up in

125
00:07:48,160 --> 00:07:56,720
Speaker 1: the attic sweating. So you gotta get it. You got

126
00:07:56,720 --> 00:08:04,200
Speaker 1: to get it to where he wants. You know, baby, baby,

127
00:08:04,360 --> 00:08:08,440
Speaker 1: I've been laying here. Where you at? I'm tied up

128
00:08:08,480 --> 00:08:14,560
Speaker 1: in the garage to the tool cabinet. What ship doing

129
00:08:14,640 --> 00:08:19,840
Speaker 1: down now? Let me go find out though, baby, Baby,

130
00:08:19,840 --> 00:08:22,760
Speaker 1: I'm ready. Where you're at. I'm in the then, choking myself.

131
00:08:26,480 --> 00:08:29,160
Speaker 1: You're trying, You're trying to get it to be a

132
00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:31,640
Speaker 1: little more kinky. You got to start, you got to

133
00:08:31,840 --> 00:08:35,280
Speaker 1: introduce him. Now. Now he can't find you at all

134
00:08:35,360 --> 00:08:38,080
Speaker 1: now because you didn't advanced it. Hee, Now he can't

135
00:08:38,080 --> 00:08:39,920
Speaker 1: even find you in the house no more. You're on

136
00:08:39,960 --> 00:08:42,040
Speaker 1: the cell phone looking for you. Baby. Where you're at,

137
00:08:42,240 --> 00:08:45,040
Speaker 1: I'm down at the YCM. I'm down at the y

138
00:08:45,240 --> 00:08:53,600
Speaker 1: m c A in waiting on you. The bedroom, baby,

139
00:08:53,679 --> 00:08:56,120
Speaker 1: Where you're at. I'm down in the kitchen putting flower

140
00:08:56,160 --> 00:09:10,280
Speaker 1: on myself and the oven's own about a cake. Yeah,

141
00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:15,760
Speaker 1: I'm about to do Yeah, I'm out there. I'm in

142
00:09:15,800 --> 00:09:24,679
Speaker 1: the backyard digging the old. Yeah, baby, I'm trying to

143
00:09:24,720 --> 00:09:28,800
Speaker 1: find you. I'm in the garage in the hood. Ain't

144
00:09:28,800 --> 00:09:41,040
Speaker 1: the only thing up open? Whoa, Yeah, that's really kinky, baby.

145
00:09:41,200 --> 00:09:44,240
Speaker 1: I'm I can't say any house well yet. I know

146
00:09:44,360 --> 00:09:46,679
Speaker 1: it's gonna sound crazy, but they clothes. I'm down to

147
00:09:46,800 --> 00:10:00,120
Speaker 1: chicken cheese. I'm laying in the ball. What you on

148
00:10:00,160 --> 00:10:07,040
Speaker 1: the balls? Yea, yeah, yeah, yeah. The game just sounded funny. Yeah,

149
00:10:07,120 --> 00:10:09,880
Speaker 1: and that's what you gotta do. You gotta introduce him

150
00:10:11,880 --> 00:10:17,440
Speaker 1: any ideas, Jay, And I'm gonna ask for a reenactment. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

151
00:10:17,520 --> 00:10:21,000
Speaker 1: I'm in. I'm baby. Where you at? Baby, I'm in

152
00:10:21,080 --> 00:10:23,800
Speaker 1: the pool and I let all the water out. Come on,

153
00:10:24,880 --> 00:10:32,440
Speaker 1: don't give in, don't don't just hate yourself. Don't don't

154
00:10:32,559 --> 00:10:37,839
Speaker 1: die food, don't don't die food. But baby, where yet?

155
00:10:38,400 --> 00:10:40,840
Speaker 1: I'm in? And then holding on to the ceiling fan.

156
00:10:41,080 --> 00:10:45,960
Speaker 1: Tetch me when I come around around the old times.

157
00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:52,280
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be a little busy and you catch me. Okay, baby, Baby,

158
00:10:52,280 --> 00:10:55,439
Speaker 1: everywhere are you at? Hold on, I'm sliding die in

159
00:10:55,480 --> 00:11:04,120
Speaker 1: the banister's naked backwards? Ready ready, paper Baby? Where are

160
00:11:04,120 --> 00:11:08,480
Speaker 1: you at? Six Flags? When the park is closed? Sitting

161
00:11:08,520 --> 00:11:14,839
Speaker 1: on the roller coaster waiting on you. He want to

162
00:11:14,880 --> 00:11:18,200
Speaker 1: do a different places, and I think that will open

163
00:11:18,280 --> 00:11:24,280
Speaker 1: his mind. Baby, where you're at the baby stroller? Were

164
00:11:24,360 --> 00:11:33,520
Speaker 1: both feet on the ground? Yeah yeah, all right, baby,

165
00:11:33,520 --> 00:11:36,760
Speaker 1: where are you at? I'm dying at the car wash?

166
00:11:36,920 --> 00:11:50,360
Speaker 1: I'm all sent Come on down without I'm a Soper dude, baby, baby,

167
00:11:50,360 --> 00:11:55,480
Speaker 1: where you're at? Where's all that wind out here? I'm

168
00:11:55,559 --> 00:11:57,880
Speaker 1: coming round in the corner. I'm hanging on the back

169
00:11:57,920 --> 00:12:08,760
Speaker 1: of a garbage truck. On it yesterday, all right? Listen,

170
00:12:08,880 --> 00:12:11,800
Speaker 1: Thank you guys. Post your comments on today's Strawberry Letter

171
00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:15,319
Speaker 1: at Steve Harvey FM on Instagram and Facebook, and check

172
00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:18,880
Speaker 1: out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand. You're listening to

173
00:12:19,040 --> 00:12:19,920
Speaker 1: the Stave