Speaker 1: My chips and.
Speaker 2: A kalas are racist money.
Speaker 1: Turn stuff.
Speaker 3: I can't tell me.
Speaker 2: Santa Baby, just bring a present under the tree for me,
Speaker 2: A ninety eight convertible light blue. I'm looking for a
Speaker 2: fly guy like you. Welcome little Mama's and gentiles and like.
Speaker 1: To another novel episode of bah Baba Told Me the
Speaker 1: podcast where we dive deep deep into the pockets of
Speaker 1: black conspiracy theories and we don't prove shit. Merry Christmas,
Speaker 1: you bitch. God Damn, it's Christmas and you a bitch.
Speaker 1: Still It's Christmas as hell and you still a bitch?
Speaker 2: Should I ask for some bitch for Christmas?
Speaker 1: Blu Sana, Please get this bitch off. I mean somebody
Speaker 1: said I have one.
Speaker 2: I have one that I've been thinking of.
Speaker 1: I'm excited.
Speaker 2: I think Kwansa could have worked if you repositioned its
Speaker 2: place in the calendar. You can't compete with Christmas. You
Speaker 2: need to move somewhere, like you know that little holiday
Speaker 2: drought from like February to May. Ye put it in there.
Speaker 1: I don't disagree with you. I think I think it's
Speaker 1: going up against a really tough spot to be the
Speaker 1: day after Christmas. What are we gonna do man, like
Speaker 1: I've hit the highest high, even if I want to
Speaker 1: celebrate Kwansa, even if I'm not anti Kwansa in this journey,
Speaker 1: God damn, are you making me ask a lot?
Speaker 2: You still feel Christmas? Because it's America. I can't not
Speaker 2: you can't. I mean, I think you as Jewish people.
Speaker 2: They must they. I mean, I guess they live in
Speaker 2: pretty Jewish communities a lot.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but they write fucking Christmas songs and it's like
Speaker 1: most of them are Jewish people.
Speaker 2: It's just like I feel like in America, you feel
Speaker 2: a major holiday wardless of whether or not like all
Speaker 2: those people can be like, I don't forget it's indigenous land,
Speaker 2: but you still felt man, thanks you felt that shit.
Speaker 1: It It is an inescapable term.
Speaker 2: And I think that Christmas is the same thing. So
Speaker 2: to put it the day after it is not possible.
Speaker 2: But you put it in that little drought. You put
Speaker 2: it in that time period where we don't have any
Speaker 2: days off, yeah, and we don't have any behind us,
Speaker 2: And you say, go want to get your Kwanza. I
Speaker 2: think people flock.
Speaker 1: And and I think it gives you a chance to
Speaker 1: take out the gift giving element of Quanta, which isn't
Speaker 1: its best feature right right, Like nobody is like, oh
Speaker 1: I got great gifts for Kwanza and shit. I think
Speaker 1: it then allows us to create something independent of gift giving,
Speaker 1: where we can actually make something meaningful for a community. Yeah.
Speaker 2: I think it was just I just think I think
Speaker 2: it's a I think it's a placement thing.
Speaker 1: It is a placement issue, and I do think some
Speaker 1: of this. I'm gonna be careful when I say this.
Speaker 1: Some of this is going to require black people to
Speaker 1: decide we are we are better than what they're asking of.
Speaker 1: You know what I mean that like, we're gonna have
Speaker 1: to give up the position we have in order to
Speaker 1: gain a better spot. Oh yeah, rather than sort of
Speaker 1: standing on our ship and being like no it's supposed
Speaker 1: to be the day after, it's like, now we gotta
Speaker 1: give it up.
Speaker 4: Man.
Speaker 2: Recognize the title light that is Christmas.
Speaker 1: It already is. It's built in, it's baked into this thing.
Speaker 1: Even if the world falls apart, they're not turning to
Speaker 1: Kwansa next.
Speaker 2: No, No, if the world falls apart, I think they
Speaker 2: fucking elevate Christmas. Yeah, then it's like, oh, this is
Speaker 2: the one thing we have from the old world. We
Speaker 2: celebrate Christmas.
Speaker 1: It's like the end of the Grinch. Ye, exactly like that.
Speaker 1: We we don't even have a roast beast, but we're
Speaker 1: still gonna We're gonna sit together and we're gonna bond
Speaker 1: because it's Christmas.
Speaker 2: Christmas is unfatable. Yeah, just we just you just gotta
Speaker 2: move it.
Speaker 1: And and we do say Merry Christmas on this holidays.
Speaker 2: We don't say happy Holidays, not Mary Xmiths. We keep
Speaker 2: that Christ in.
Speaker 1: There, We keep that is in there. We love them
Speaker 1: too much. Him in the middle. We got a lot
Speaker 1: of we we haven't done this in a while, but
Speaker 1: I think it's good that we do it. We got
Speaker 1: some emails from let's get to the email and this
Speaker 1: is our holiday episode.
Speaker 2: I don't have anything even kind.
Speaker 1: Of press something Christmasy. Give the folks something, uh with
Speaker 1: a good, warm, jolly spirit.
Speaker 5: Pot my butt.
Speaker 2: Pot, pot, my butt pot, my butt pot, pot my butt.
Speaker 1: Do you know what pop my butt meant to Harriet Tubman?
Speaker 3: Do you know what that meant?
Speaker 1: It meant a whip?
Speaker 4: Ye?
Speaker 1: And do you know what it meant to missus Claus
Speaker 1: something else opposite? Yeah, that's okay. They won't notice, they
Speaker 1: won't know.
Speaker 3: Hi.
Speaker 1: We're gonna do an email. But we got an email
Speaker 1: from someone who said, hello, Langston and David. Don't we
Speaker 1: don't have a name for this person. Maybe they said
Speaker 1: in the body of the email, they said, I love
Speaker 1: the podcast three exclamation points. My mama told me that
Speaker 1: Santa Claus will spit his chewing tobacco directly into your
Speaker 1: eyes if he catches you looking at him on Christmas Eve.
Speaker 1: Santa's chewing tobacco will cause permanent, sudden magical blindness. All right, I.
Speaker 2: Don't think that's just Santa's chewing.
Speaker 1: I think you don't want that stuff in your eyes
Speaker 1: or no.
Speaker 2: Also, I think regionally, if you are somewhere where Santa
Speaker 2: had chewing tobacco anyways, you were coming from maybe a Dirk.
Speaker 1: That's right, you know, I agree with you.
Speaker 2: I've never heard of Saanda smoking cigarettes or chewing tobacco.
Speaker 1: I thought Santa was not addicted to nicotine products. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's unfortunate that he is. But no, I don't believe
Speaker 1: that that Santa is spitting in my eyes.
Speaker 2: Because you're in a you're you're at a place where
Speaker 2: they could easily convince you that Santa choose. They were
Speaker 2: like all the men you know, choosers.
Speaker 1: Of all you know. He chews tobacco. It's a long ride.
Speaker 1: Santa needs to come. What's he gonna stop and smoke cigarettes? No,
Speaker 1: he has to get his fixed and he just spits
Speaker 1: it out the sleigh. He spits it out, and if
Speaker 1: it does land on your head, that's good luck. But
Speaker 1: if it gets in your eyes, your couragechow blind, cube blind,
Speaker 1: magical shoe blind. I was talking to my little brother
Speaker 1: about this, since we have a big age gap between
Speaker 1: us and didn't believe in Santa at the same time.
Speaker 1: We somehow never discovered this until recently. Always sounds like
Speaker 1: they both were told this despite being from different eras
Speaker 1: of Santa belief. I asked my mom about the origins,
Speaker 1: and she swears she didn't make it up, and when
Speaker 1: she was growing up, old black people would tell this
Speaker 1: to children. I doubt that I will share this with
Speaker 1: my kids. I would hope not not, because I don't
Speaker 1: want to pass down the mostly the most jolly form
Speaker 1: of terror that I've ever experienced. But I fear the
Speaker 1: children of today don't know what chewing tobacco is. Anyway,
Speaker 1: Please share your thoughts. Have you ever heard of this?
Speaker 1: Enjoyed the holiday season? Ever heard of it?
Speaker 2: But noted several times. I was not a Santa like
Speaker 2: I had never enerly it does. The Lord doesn't run
Speaker 2: deep in my family.
Speaker 1: I yeah, I don't know what. I never heard of
Speaker 1: this in my life. Santa for me was never punishing people.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I mean, I guess the lump of.
Speaker 1: Coal that was to me more just like, hey man,
Speaker 1: you know what you did right, right right, I'm just
Speaker 1: giving you what you earned. You did this to you, Yeah,
Speaker 1: and we can we can reassess next year. I'm not
Speaker 1: like permanently mad at you. This Santa is like I
Speaker 1: will take your fucking eyeballs from you.
Speaker 2: You're right, because like Santa also never felt like he
Speaker 2: wanted to give the call. No, it felt like it
Speaker 2: was like you forced him to do it.
Speaker 1: This this one is imagining Santa is Steve Harvey at
Speaker 1: the Steve Harvey Show. Yeah, it's like, if you look
Speaker 1: at me in the hallway, I'll fucking I'll fucking kill you.
Speaker 2: I feel like Santa. Also, I feel like there's Santa
Speaker 2: also stem from one time there was a Santa with
Speaker 2: Chew and tobacco. But I think this came from a
Speaker 2: real event. People saw what happened. Yeah, maybe they had
Speaker 2: the meanest uncle place saying, I assume it was to
Speaker 2: work off some.
Speaker 1: Type of a card den.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and then like he's spitting the kid's eye, and
Speaker 2: they were like, you know, don't do that.
Speaker 1: You know you aren't supposed to ask mister Isaac to
Speaker 1: do this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, now he is, and he's
Speaker 1: acting the way mister Isaac always acts. He chews tobacco
Speaker 1: and he spits on children. Yeah, yeah, yeah, we knew that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you looked at him too long, and that's on you, baby,
Speaker 1: Now move out the way. The line is pretty.
Speaker 2: Packed, But I like the conspiracy.
Speaker 1: I think it's nice. I do think that that children
Speaker 1: would probably behave better with a few knuckle sandwiches on
Speaker 1: the other end of it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, yeah, I get that. I don't think
Speaker 2: I feel like kids aren't afraid of violence now in
Speaker 2: the home, right.
Speaker 1: My children certainly aren't. I can't speak to other people's kids,
Speaker 1: but I'm threatening a lot after a while, blowing out
Speaker 1: threats left and right, and they don't believe a word. Yeah,
Speaker 1: go ahead, and man, go to jail. Tonight. Yeah.
Speaker 2: I like that though. I like a meaner I like
Speaker 2: a meaner Santra who cares.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: In in in other countries, Santa is a little meaner.
Speaker 2: He seems like a lot more nefarious in in like
Speaker 2: Black Pete.
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, black Pete is his slave. That isn't Santa.
Speaker 1: That's the slave boy he keeps with him. I thought
Speaker 1: I thought it was his friend. No, I thought it
Speaker 1: was like mister Isaac. Unfortunately, No, this is is a
Speaker 1: slave and he might be cool like mister Isaac, but
Speaker 1: he is not probably means he's also mean like mister
Speaker 1: we understand. Yeah, but there are like versions of Santa
Speaker 1: Claus and like Germany and ship where like he is
Speaker 1: a demon of sorts. Crampis is sort of like the punished,
Speaker 1: punishing Santa versus like the other spirits that are a
Speaker 1: little more like gift giving and jolly and shit.
Speaker 2: I think I'd rather actually stay. When I think about Crampus,
Speaker 2: I'm like, nah, keep it. At the end of the year,
Speaker 2: we're just trying to.
Speaker 1: Go out nice. I don't need a demon. Yeah, Santa's nice.
Speaker 1: I like Santa being nice. I like the Coca Cola
Speaker 1: version of Santa.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, jolly white man, red cheeks.
Speaker 1: Come on, you don't got to be black for me.
Speaker 2: I don't need that.
Speaker 1: And I know that that may sound like some cool shit.
Speaker 1: I really don't know.
Speaker 2: I'm just I'm just really trying to think about it
Speaker 2: in a real way, because we did just get some
Speaker 2: black Santa Claus wrapping paper and I love it.
Speaker 1: No, I'm cool with with a black Santa, but I
Speaker 1: don't feel that deep need where it's like Santa, my
Speaker 1: children are only going to know a Bana.
Speaker 2: I don't think that's where we need to fight that battle. No,
Speaker 2: there are still white people. We can have beloved white people.
Speaker 1: Here's my problem is that when you make Santa uh,
Speaker 1: when you're too passionate about Santa's racial identity, you stop
Speaker 1: dealing with the fact that this motherfucker ain't real. At
Speaker 1: the end of the day. That's a good point. My
Speaker 1: kids are going to eventually come to understand that this
Speaker 1: isn't real and therefore anything can be whatever you want
Speaker 1: it to be. Yeah, that's fair. I don't need you
Speaker 1: to be under some weird restriction where it's like no Santa,
Speaker 1: black Santa, Santa white, Like that's all gonna make you
Speaker 1: messy and weird. I don't need that.
Speaker 2: I still am pro black Easter money.
Speaker 1: I love a black Easter much. Make the Easter Bunny
Speaker 1: as dark as you can as jam and Hansu Jaimen
Speaker 1: Hanzu starring this year in the Easter Bunny.
Speaker 2: Uh. But yeah, I like that. I think that's a
Speaker 2: funny conspiracy. I've never heard it. It sounds like you're
Speaker 2: from a harsh place, and it sounds like you've outgrown it.
Speaker 1: Good for you. Yeah, don't you tobacco, and don't tell
Speaker 1: your children that that could happen to them.
Speaker 2: Don't you find tobacco. The leaf stuff is sick.
Speaker 1: The next email says, hey, conspiracy nerds, I don't like that.
Speaker 1: Long time, first time. My baby cousin told me some
Speaker 1: shit yesterday during our evening smoke session that really fucked
Speaker 1: me up. She said, Santa is a cryptid. Here's her proof.
Speaker 1: Santa is a jolly, plump elf. Have you ever heard
Speaker 1: of a fat elf? He's got to be their king. Okay,
Speaker 1: this already puts me in a challenging position.
Speaker 2: Yeah, your postures turn serious.
Speaker 1: I don't consider Santa to be an elf.
Speaker 2: I didn't think so either.
Speaker 1: I think that's a man who has met some elves
Speaker 1: and decided this is a good business opportunity.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like it's like a snow White and the
Speaker 2: Seven Doors.
Speaker 3: You know.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I never thought he was a big I never
Speaker 2: thought he was a big elf.
Speaker 1: No, I think he's a I think that's a full
Speaker 1: grown dude.
Speaker 2: And he doesn't have like names like them. Yeah Santa, Yeah,
Speaker 2: he's not like Molly Wipe or whatever.
Speaker 1: Gum belly.
Speaker 2: Yeah, very masculating names on these elves.
Speaker 1: You got elves. You gotta think about that.
Speaker 2: But now I can imagine smoking with my baby cousin.
Speaker 2: I get lost in it a little bit. You start, you.
Speaker 1: Stop thinking because he does entirely hang out with elves.
Speaker 1: Nobody has a familial history with him.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's almost like the Gary Owen of of elves.
Speaker 1: Yeah, where you're like, hey, man, he's not black, but
Speaker 1: he has spent a lot of time with us. It's
Speaker 1: Missus clausingol. I do not believe Missus Claws. I think
Speaker 1: if she is an elf, Santa's a fuck boy. I
Speaker 1: think Santa's a piece of shit. You gotta like a
Speaker 1: scummy Santa. And he moved into this community and just
Speaker 1: started stealing their women. That's nuts, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: Je did on her with another black lady.
Speaker 2: All I'm saying, Santa people loved by the elves and
Speaker 2: not be one is how I feel.
Speaker 1: Sure. Yeah, okay, here's here's their other proof. He's like
Speaker 1: a cross between Dionysus, rosy cheeks and a bowl full
Speaker 1: of jelly. And they all father snow white hair, twinkling eyes. Odin,
Speaker 1: I guess so or Zeus. I think whatever you consider
Speaker 1: to be you know, the the image of the game God,
Speaker 1: that is Jesus's daddy in your mind. You know what
Speaker 1: I mean that that whole thing. And like Bigfoot, Santa
Speaker 1: is frequently sighted but never caught. Are people seeing Santa? No,
Speaker 1: I don't know anybody who I think.
Speaker 2: I saw him in the sky and go to sleep.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Last year we put I.
Speaker 2: Only know that from commercials we put.
Speaker 1: We put fucking baby powder on some of my boots
Speaker 1: and then we we made prints to be like whoa
Speaker 1: Anta was here? Did she go crazy? Idiots believed every
Speaker 1: word I said, fucking dumb dumbs.
Speaker 2: I did it.
Speaker 1: I made the prince, I made a full circle. I
Speaker 1: made it go over by the cookies. And then I
Speaker 1: made it walk out. It's all a lie.
Speaker 2: That's that's so sweet though, what you're saying.
Speaker 1: They're so dumb fall for anything.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm here trying to hear. Yeah, okay, they're your kids,
Speaker 2: all right, he said.
Speaker 1: Now I did remember her, or I did remind her
Speaker 1: that a Kryptidis part animal like a missing link, y'all.
Speaker 1: She thinks Bigfoot is like the missing link between us
Speaker 1: and the apes. Santa is like the link is the
Speaker 1: link between us and the future. Whoa, the suit is
Speaker 1: his skin not close. We're all getting bigger, we're living longer.
Speaker 1: He's showing us the future. I don't know what y'all think, Amari.
Speaker 2: I think maybe one blunt evening session with the baby
Speaker 2: cousin split her brain still developing. Split that blunt, yeah,
Speaker 2: split it out on both knee one. Maybe put some
Speaker 2: grabber in there or some shit.
Speaker 1: I don't know where you are regionally. Uh No, I
Speaker 1: think now's the time to invest in your cousin on
Speaker 1: a more personal level.
Speaker 2: Yeah, man, you guys can just talk.
Speaker 1: You don't have to make up sort of whimsy to
Speaker 1: be able to connect with you. Guys don't got to
Speaker 1: get zooted anymore. Bro, ask her what her dream is. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like really get to know who she is and maybe
Speaker 1: you won't get trapped in these weird cryptic conversations. But
Speaker 1: that is fun.
Speaker 2: It think is fun the idea that it's just scanned
Speaker 2: and maybe it's some kind of a crazy hair growth.
Speaker 1: And then like I do like this idea of him
Speaker 1: being of the future. Yeah, that's exciting. That's that's very
Speaker 1: exciting in a way that that actually makes it more
Speaker 1: reasonable because him just being this weird like non deity
Speaker 1: is but still e turn old feels.
Speaker 2: That is weird what you're doing here this whole time? Yeah,
Speaker 2: and how did a man ascend to that?
Speaker 1: Yeah? But a dude just coming from the future, like
Speaker 1: you know, fucking cables cool.
Speaker 2: He's like, where is Sarah Conna like that?
Speaker 1: Yeah all right, He's like, No, I think I could
Speaker 1: just make the world better. I can't kill anybody, but
Speaker 1: I will like drop off presents on assholes porches and
Speaker 1: ship Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he drops someone from a porch.
Speaker 1: That that you I said it. That was a mistake. Oh,
Speaker 1: I don't believe Santa To to just be delivering them
Speaker 1: like Fede.
Speaker 2: Yeah, when you do it, are you like, oh, look
Speaker 2: at this, Santa brought this.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Santa don't bring everything. Yeah, you gotta bring you bring, I.
Speaker 2: Bring most of it. Okay, that's and I make that clear.
Speaker 1: And then one time Santa does something nice for you. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: I don't want you worshiping now that I do feel
Speaker 1: passionate about my child. Are not not going to worship
Speaker 1: a white man in the sky. I got that, regardless
Speaker 1: of his contributions to us. You you're not. You don't
Speaker 1: get to do.
Speaker 2: All of it.
Speaker 1: Sanna gets you the big gifts. Santa gives you something.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but it's not You're not man. Cannot subsist on Santa.
Speaker 2: Come on, No, Daddy brings the break. Daddy brings the break.
Speaker 1: All right, yeah, Fish, we need to take a break.
Speaker 1: We're gonna be back and then we're gonna do a
Speaker 1: voicemail together. Let's do it, all right. More David more Langston.
Speaker 2: My ma Mama told me.
Speaker 1: People who were in Slavery wish that they had curve
Speaker 1: sided service.
Speaker 2: At Applebee's, and I wish I had curbsided service at
Speaker 2: the North Pole Welcome back to My mama told me,
Speaker 2: I don't even know what I meant by that.
Speaker 1: You're going to pick up. You're going to pick up.
Speaker 2: I'm going to pick up the gifts, which maybe it
Speaker 2: saves money, like when you do it uber eats. I
Speaker 2: guess I'm.
Speaker 1: Gonna go get to you. I'm gonna go. My relationship
Speaker 1: with Santa hasn't been an expensive one up to this point. Okay,
Speaker 1: the gifts are free in theory, as long as you
Speaker 1: believe and ship.
Speaker 2: It's a nasty conspiracy.
Speaker 1: It is a nasty conspiracy. White man from the sky
Speaker 1: will will treat you if you just act the way
Speaker 1: he wants you to and.
Speaker 2: He doesn't have to do anything else. All he has
Speaker 2: to do he shows up on It's a it's a
Speaker 2: deadie dad.
Speaker 1: We're never getting any of the bad news about Santa. No,
Speaker 1: the way he speaks to those elves, the way he
Speaker 1: speaks to missus claus bro that big ass elf lady,
Speaker 1: big ass elf bitch, that's what he calls him. Here,
Speaker 1: he says, I took you off the caves, bitch. In caves,
Speaker 1: I can have your ass sleeping with needle Thumb right
Speaker 1: now in a two bedroom with Marshmallow. You want to
Speaker 1: live with Marshmallow, you know? He piece of bed. He
Speaker 1: has a out rainbow here, stupid bitch, kive me my egg.
Speaker 2: We have a voicemail.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we have a very fun voice voicemail.
Speaker 2: Let's play it.
Speaker 1: Let's do it.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I called this line to get freaky, all right, but
Speaker 3: I got some I got something to say. I'm gonna
Speaker 3: say it right now.
Speaker 1: Okay.
Speaker 3: First off, he sees you where you're sleeping, he knows
Speaker 3: when you're away, he knows who good but it's for goodness.
Speaker 3: You know who else does? Santa Claus Freddy fucking Sugar. Okay,
Speaker 3: Now I'm gonna show you how these two are connected.
Speaker 1: All right.
Speaker 3: First off, Santa Clause is a mantle passed down like
Speaker 3: double oh seven that you hear me. It's tad down
Speaker 3: like double O sep. You know one of them. It
Speaker 3: changed like the pope every now and then you hear me. Now,
Speaker 3: where are the similarities? I'm gonna break it.
Speaker 1: Down for okay, didn't take your time.
Speaker 3: Pretty much. Freddy was one of the Santa Clau from
Speaker 3: back in the day, right back in the yonder years.
Speaker 3: Why he always has a Christmas weather why he has
Speaker 3: those claws? Reminded that he used to be a ten
Speaker 3: of Claus. Okay, but this ten had a problem. Okay,
Speaker 3: so he liked the little kids period him in his lap,
Speaker 3: you get all happy, kickity and ship. Right. The black
Speaker 3: al didn't like that. Sh'S not the white help. They
Speaker 3: got to keep their mouth shut so they keep getting
Speaker 3: their benefits or whatever. Not the black yelp. They didn't
Speaker 3: get the fuck. So they got with miss Claus.
Speaker 1: Right.
Speaker 3: Miss Claus was like, oh, this nigga gotta go. So
Speaker 3: what they did. They teamed up and they baked his
Speaker 3: ass and the big ass furnace. Right, I don't know
Speaker 3: how they tricked him in there. Fighters and no cookies
Speaker 3: and they're like, oh here, I'm pretty sure they druged
Speaker 3: him in there through his ass in there right, burnt
Speaker 3: them all up. So how did you give revenge? See,
Speaker 3: he upgraded then the little kids. He's going after teenagers
Speaker 3: now because the little kids that was little kids when
Speaker 3: he was there, they were teenagers now now that they
Speaker 3: all going up. So now he has to get it
Speaker 3: all their descendants through their dreams and shit. Okay, he
Speaker 3: sees you when you're sleeper, he knows when you're awake
Speaker 3: because he has people's dreams. That's why. All right, Well
Speaker 3: that's my theory Freddy Taylor, same person. Okat, grow out
Speaker 3: with bad bitch.
Speaker 1: Brother. You take care.
Speaker 2: I think you have some underlying issues. There were some
Speaker 2: themes that were difficult there.
Speaker 1: We we don't have nothing to talk about with you.
Speaker 1: We wish you the best you you are in a
Speaker 1: way that we can't help. Man, you got feel so
Speaker 1: safe going on. Okay, it's all right, Hey, hey, hey,
Speaker 1: come on, hey, Merry Christmas to you and a happy
Speaker 1: New Year. I pray to God your Santa is not
Speaker 1: Freddy Krueger this year.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I hope feel it you out soon whatever
Speaker 2: institution they.
Speaker 1: Got you in. Listen, listen. We weren't rushing you off
Speaker 1: the phone. No, you weren't rushing either. It feels as
Speaker 1: if you had some time on your hands. I'm not
Speaker 1: saying David's not saying that's incarceration, but certainly maybe this
Speaker 1: was an allotted break.
Speaker 2: All I'm saying is free you till we say it back.
Speaker 2: I was interested at first, I got and then I
Speaker 2: got scared.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it was really like he was okay, like all right,
Speaker 1: Freddy Krueger and Santa Claus do have like these deep similarities,
Speaker 1: the weird sort of Christmas ey sweater energy does feel
Speaker 1: like it's symbolic of something like I could find myself
Speaker 1: in parts of this, and then it became this very
Speaker 1: imagined story. He was world building, bro it felt like
Speaker 1: Dungeons and Dragon.
Speaker 2: He was world building in a very creative way.
Speaker 1: Very He told us that there was a racial divide
Speaker 1: amongst the l Yeah. He told us that there were.
Speaker 2: Our benefits that I think the Blacks weren't allowed access to.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but also the blacks stood on something they Yeah.
Speaker 2: There was also a whole family of clauses.
Speaker 1: Yep. There there is a almost like a mafia type yeah,
Speaker 1: which was autization.
Speaker 2: That's cause and it's like the gas.
Speaker 1: It's like the Gambinos. But they also like are are
Speaker 1: killing each other still, like Santa Claus would kill someone.
Speaker 2: Because they're still clauses. And then but he wanted to
Speaker 2: be the dawn man. Yep.
Speaker 1: Yes, Don Krueger, Don Don Don Noel. Instead, it's a
Speaker 1: good team right here. Creative teeth.
Speaker 2: Yeah, uh yeah, maybe it was just listening to another.
Speaker 1: Yeah, thank you, thank you brother, and you are you
Speaker 1: made the prayer list. You made the list. Congratulations to you.
Speaker 1: That don't happen A lot a lot of people call.
Speaker 1: I don't pray for them.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna praise for true and I'm gonna light a candle.
Speaker 1: All right, we can do one more, one more voice, man,
Speaker 1: then you get the fuck out of here. Let's do
Speaker 1: you know? You said they're crazy, so let's try. Is
Speaker 1: Jack Frost a horror movie?
Speaker 4: Oh my god, I can't believe I'm doing this. Okay,
Speaker 4: So I can't see who I am at all or anything,
Speaker 4: because I think my voice is identifiable enough. Oh my god,
Speaker 4: words away. I'm like literally driving to go get some
Speaker 4: wings stop. Dang, I'm gonna say something else, but just
Speaker 4: because I said I was driving, I won't say that.
Speaker 4: But I'm calling in a way that y'all said don't
Speaker 4: call people tend to call that way anyway, Oh my god. Anyway,
Speaker 4: I'm driving to get some wing stop.
Speaker 5: And do not drink and dry, right, I think that
Speaker 5: is what this person is admitting to.
Speaker 1: Oh, mayor they're drunk and calling and driving, and that's
Speaker 1: a lot on a person and a lot on the road.
Speaker 1: Oh boy, we don't encourage that here on the podcast.
Speaker 1: We never will. Yeah, that's crazy. Please please put down
Speaker 1: that pint before you hit that or maybe we misread it.
Speaker 1: I don't think we did, but you can put press way.
Speaker 4: I'm driving to get some wings stop and I was
Speaker 4: listening to the latest upload and David's commercial was like
Speaker 4: links is not here. If you want to leave some
Speaker 4: holiday conspiracies, do that, and I couldn't think of any.
Speaker 4: But then I was like, shit, okay, so I have
Speaker 4: this one. So do y'all remember the movie Jack Frost?
Speaker 1: Yes, isn't that a Christmas movie.
Speaker 4: With Like, I'm thinking of the wrong white man. It's
Speaker 4: not Kevin Costner, but that's the name. Anyway, there's also
Speaker 4: a horror movie called Jack Frost.
Speaker 2: What's up with that?
Speaker 4: Because now I only think of a horror movie, but
Speaker 4: somehow I think of that one wholesome movie with that
Speaker 4: one white man who's not Kevin Costner. Anyway, I hope
Speaker 4: it makes the episode. I hope you'll talk about this ship.
Speaker 1: I love y'all. Yeah, bye, what do you want from that?
Speaker 1: You know what I mean? Like? What are you asking
Speaker 1: us to do? Here? You you called us? You said
Speaker 1: there's a movie that I've seen, there's another movie, and
Speaker 1: then there's another movie that I've seen, And what's up
Speaker 1: with that? I don't know. Man, I don't got it
Speaker 1: for you. What what do you want? You called? I
Speaker 1: think you want some wing stop. You're drinking, you're driving. Focus.
Speaker 1: It's not good to drink drunk drive. It's bad to
Speaker 1: drink and drive. But if you're gonna do it, you
Speaker 1: gotta focus. And you can't call a podcast. You gotta
Speaker 1: leave us out of this. If you're calling a podcast,
Speaker 1: you can't call us no. Come on, man, you know
Speaker 1: we're not gonna handle this good. That's oh man, Jack Frost,
Speaker 1: what are you doing?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Jack Frost was both a horror movie. Uh. There's a
Speaker 1: a nineteen ninety seven horror comedy called Jack Frost, and
Speaker 1: then similarly, there is a Jack Frost uh with Michael
Speaker 1: Keaton that comes out the following year that is not
Speaker 1: a horror comedy comedy. It's a family comedy about Michael
Speaker 1: Keaton getting turned into a snowbet man.
Speaker 2: Yeah, any snowboards.
Speaker 1: Now here's what I'll say, And I'm willing to explore
Speaker 1: a conspiracy that you did not introduce to us. This
Speaker 1: didn't come from you, brother. You didn't offer us any
Speaker 1: context for what to do with this conversation. But what
Speaker 1: I will say is it does get interesting. To me
Speaker 1: when a property fails and then they try to sort
Speaker 1: of like redefine it or save it on the back end.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because you wonder was one of those move was
Speaker 2: the second movie going to be called Jack Frost because
Speaker 2: you know how far an advanced production is. Like maybe
Speaker 2: because that other one failed, they were like, go on,
Speaker 2: call this new one, Jack Frost. Watch which movie did better?
Speaker 2: The Michael Keaton one came out later, So that was
Speaker 2: I assume the one they were thinking was going to
Speaker 2: be good.
Speaker 1: That's someone I would assume the bigger hit of yeahs
Speaker 1: nineteen percent on Rotten Tomatoes. It was a more like
Speaker 1: commercially success, commercially successful film versus the other Jack Frost.
Speaker 1: And I do think like if I'm the producers of
Speaker 1: that film, I watched Jack Frost, the horror movie fail
Speaker 1: and I go fuck it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, we're fine. We'll be all right. Yeah,
Speaker 2: nobody even knows that happened.
Speaker 1: We can weather this storm. Yeah yeah yeah, And whatever
Speaker 1: the associations might be, so be it.
Speaker 2: And also, do not drink and drive. Do not drink
Speaker 2: and drive and call call us.
Speaker 1: We love hearing.
Speaker 2: When we stopped livers now it says so on the back, and.
Speaker 1: It's and it tastes the same, you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: they didn't work that hard on it in the first place. Well,
Speaker 1: I'm not w wing starts pretty good, all right, man.
Speaker 1: I think I love Wingstock. Okay, I'm a big I'm
Speaker 1: a big fan of Wingstop. But I am not going
Speaker 1: to pretend for a second that there are real chefs
Speaker 1: in those kitchens. Oh yeah, yeah, okay. I winding Stop
Speaker 1: perfected the formula in a lab. Anybody could do it.
Speaker 1: Anybody could give us the Wingstop. It just happens that
Speaker 1: there are some teenagers I have to ask politely for
Speaker 1: for eight bonus?
Speaker 2: Yeah, can you turn the ice machine on?
Speaker 1: Yeah? I know it's not you know hey, man, I
Speaker 1: did say blue cheese. This is ranch? Yeah?
Speaker 2: Could we could you guys for it? So you need
Speaker 2: to fix it? Come on, man, you charge me. They're
Speaker 2: charging too much for ranch.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and I don't I'm going to say this. I
Speaker 1: don't want carrots from Wingstop.
Speaker 2: Oh the carroat's always some sit weird.
Speaker 1: In my stomach, That's what I'm saying. Like, I don't
Speaker 1: need you all to pretend that you do wings traditional
Speaker 1: with vegetables.
Speaker 2: Give me that corn. Give me those weird textured fries.
Speaker 1: Just give me the wings. Yeah, everything else, the corns,
Speaker 1: I'm saying, like everything else that's on the menu, But
Speaker 1: I don't need the accouterment that wingstop provides because it
Speaker 1: is not good produce. You're not ye, it's not high quality.
Speaker 1: You're not investing in good products. So you can keep
Speaker 1: the carrots in the celery. I'm just gonna I'm gonna
Speaker 1: dip my wings in my French fries and be all right. Christmas,
Speaker 1: Merry Christmas. I hope this warmed everyone's hearts. Yeah, us
Speaker 1: talking down to two people who called weird.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I think if you're struggling for addiction at
Speaker 2: this time this time.
Speaker 1: We'll check on you in the new year. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: be with my family, but tell the people where they
Speaker 1: can find you.
Speaker 2: Cool.
Speaker 6: Got joke City seven on it Instagram. That's really it
Speaker 6: right now. Follow me Atlanceman Kerrman on all social media platforms.
Speaker 6: That aspiring Deadbeat Tour continues in twenty twenty six. We're
Speaker 6: gonna have lots of new dates for you to check out,
Speaker 6: and more importantly, send us your drops, your own conspiracy theories.
Speaker 6: Tell us something that actually makes sense at Mymama pod
Speaker 6: at gmail dot com and of course give us a
Speaker 6: call at A four four Little Moms, we will talk
Speaker 6: down to you. And by the merch by a nice
Speaker 6: present for someone by bitch.
Speaker 1: Tho the Blessings of God. My Mama Told Me is
Speaker 1: a production of Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network and
Speaker 1: iHeart Podcasts.
Speaker 2: Created and hosted by Langston KRK.
Speaker 1: Co hosted by David Bordi.
Speaker 2: Executive produced by Will Ferrell, Hansani and Joel Monique.
Speaker 1: Co produced by Bee Wayne.
Speaker 2: Edited and engineered by Justin Kahne.
Speaker 1: Music by Nick Chambers, artwork by Dogon Cree. You can
Speaker 1: now watch episodes of My Mama Told Me on YouTube.
Speaker 1: Follow at My Mama Told Me and subscribe to our
Speaker 1: channel