1 00:00:02,800 --> 00:00:11,200 Speaker 1: This is Teddy Teapot Within. Hi guys, thanks for joining 2 00:00:11,240 --> 00:00:15,480 Speaker 1: me again this week. So the question is the social 3 00:00:15,520 --> 00:00:19,640 Speaker 1: media a friend of me? What is it actually doing 4 00:00:19,720 --> 00:00:22,400 Speaker 1: to us? You know, in one of the last podcasts 5 00:00:22,440 --> 00:00:26,560 Speaker 1: we talked about addiction and the social media and addiction. 6 00:00:26,800 --> 00:00:28,960 Speaker 1: Sometimes when I look at my phone and it tells 7 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:31,960 Speaker 1: me how many hours I've actually been on my phone, 8 00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:33,919 Speaker 1: I don't even want to look at it. And then 9 00:00:33,960 --> 00:00:37,840 Speaker 1: I tried justifying it and saying, oh, well, it's because 10 00:00:37,840 --> 00:00:40,320 Speaker 1: my business is on is on the phone, so that's why. 11 00:00:40,520 --> 00:00:42,800 Speaker 1: But it still makes me feel bad, like I cannot 12 00:00:42,800 --> 00:00:45,600 Speaker 1: believe I am spending this much time on my phone. 13 00:00:46,080 --> 00:00:50,240 Speaker 1: So we are going to have a group of people 14 00:00:50,320 --> 00:00:54,279 Speaker 1: coming in to uncover all sides of social media. We're 15 00:00:54,280 --> 00:00:58,600 Speaker 1: going to start with having Dr Hillary Goldscher on and 16 00:00:58,720 --> 00:01:02,320 Speaker 1: she is going to help us talk about the dangers 17 00:01:02,440 --> 00:01:06,479 Speaker 1: of social media. As you have seen, Instagram has put 18 00:01:06,720 --> 00:01:10,039 Speaker 1: us all into a frenzy because it's taking away our likes. 19 00:01:10,680 --> 00:01:14,160 Speaker 1: What's going to happen next? Does this matter? Is this helpful? 20 00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:17,720 Speaker 1: I need to know it all? So I'm excited for 21 00:01:17,760 --> 00:01:20,240 Speaker 1: this episode. We are going to have so many people on. 22 00:01:20,400 --> 00:01:23,000 Speaker 1: I'm actually gonna have Dr Hillary goldcher on with me 23 00:01:23,080 --> 00:01:26,240 Speaker 1: the entire time because I want to have a psychologist 24 00:01:26,280 --> 00:01:29,000 Speaker 1: view on all of the topics. We are also going 25 00:01:29,040 --> 00:01:34,240 Speaker 1: to have Jamie Kidd who is an influencer, and Alexis Haynes. 26 00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:38,000 Speaker 1: She has a podcast called Recovering from Reality and she 27 00:01:38,080 --> 00:01:41,320 Speaker 1: has a really crazy story, but also she has kids, 28 00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:43,360 Speaker 1: so I want to dig into that. And we also 29 00:01:43,400 --> 00:01:48,640 Speaker 1: have Rich Dumuro who is a tech genius. He knows 30 00:01:48,720 --> 00:01:51,200 Speaker 1: everything on tech, so we're gonna have to drill him 31 00:01:51,200 --> 00:02:05,720 Speaker 1: as well. I'm here with Dr Goldscher right now and 32 00:02:05,840 --> 00:02:10,080 Speaker 1: she is a psychologist who specializes in mental health, which 33 00:02:11,160 --> 00:02:14,960 Speaker 1: I feel like social media is affecting so many of 34 00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:20,320 Speaker 1: our mental health issues. What are your thoughts. It's so 35 00:02:20,440 --> 00:02:23,160 Speaker 1: interesting when I was kind of anticipating talking about this, 36 00:02:23,320 --> 00:02:28,120 Speaker 1: that that discussion in my private practice is so ubiquitous, 37 00:02:28,160 --> 00:02:33,960 Speaker 1: like the anxiety, depression, feelings of shame that come up 38 00:02:34,880 --> 00:02:39,000 Speaker 1: when one peruses social media and feels kind of an 39 00:02:39,040 --> 00:02:43,960 Speaker 1: obligation to participate and yet feels worse when participating, and 40 00:02:44,120 --> 00:02:47,520 Speaker 1: this vicious cycle ensues. And there's been a number of studies, 41 00:02:47,520 --> 00:02:50,680 Speaker 1: like empirical studies that show there's a direct link between 42 00:02:50,720 --> 00:02:54,679 Speaker 1: an increase in depression and anxiety, feelings of shame diminished 43 00:02:54,680 --> 00:02:57,800 Speaker 1: self forth related to social media for sure. And do 44 00:02:57,840 --> 00:03:01,959 Speaker 1: you think social media is helping or hurting our real 45 00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:05,839 Speaker 1: life social interaction? You know, I mean, I think there's 46 00:03:05,840 --> 00:03:09,799 Speaker 1: an argument to be made on both sides that's worth exploring. 47 00:03:09,919 --> 00:03:12,600 Speaker 1: I think on the macro level, it's hard to deny 48 00:03:12,639 --> 00:03:15,959 Speaker 1: that it's not hurting our interactions. It's so much easier 49 00:03:16,000 --> 00:03:18,400 Speaker 1: to kind of it's a cliche, but to hide behind 50 00:03:18,400 --> 00:03:21,400 Speaker 1: a screen and to present a sort of persona to 51 00:03:21,520 --> 00:03:25,480 Speaker 1: the world, and then to minimize our desire or interest 52 00:03:25,600 --> 00:03:28,639 Speaker 1: or even like our ability to interact with other people. 53 00:03:28,880 --> 00:03:34,880 Speaker 1: So I think it it It diminishes connection and reduces 54 00:03:34,960 --> 00:03:37,680 Speaker 1: the skills that, like our young people have to actually 55 00:03:37,680 --> 00:03:39,400 Speaker 1: be out in the world and connect with each other. Well, 56 00:03:39,440 --> 00:03:42,440 Speaker 1: that leads me to our next question. Do you how 57 00:03:42,480 --> 00:03:44,520 Speaker 1: young do you think it's too young for kids to 58 00:03:44,560 --> 00:03:50,680 Speaker 1: have social media? I'm like sixteen, maybe the earliest really, 59 00:03:50,880 --> 00:03:52,840 Speaker 1: But I mean I will look on social media and 60 00:03:52,920 --> 00:03:56,280 Speaker 1: I will see kids that are like fourteen and they 61 00:03:56,280 --> 00:03:59,560 Speaker 1: look twenty five years old and these sexy poses, and 62 00:03:59,640 --> 00:04:03,440 Speaker 1: I am like panicked for my kids. And in part 63 00:04:03,840 --> 00:04:06,000 Speaker 1: and this is kind of a weighted statement, but it's 64 00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:08,720 Speaker 1: a parental issue. I mean, I get that there are 65 00:04:08,800 --> 00:04:13,120 Speaker 1: ways to circumvent parents, you know, and to post and 66 00:04:13,240 --> 00:04:15,880 Speaker 1: do things that parents don't know about, but it's really 67 00:04:15,880 --> 00:04:19,960 Speaker 1: a parental responsibility to monitor that stuff and shut it down. If, 68 00:04:20,080 --> 00:04:22,760 Speaker 1: like you're talking about, you know, young females projecting that 69 00:04:22,839 --> 00:04:25,080 Speaker 1: kind of kind of image into the world, it's dangerous 70 00:04:25,120 --> 00:04:28,160 Speaker 1: for many many reasons. Yeah, I know, what would you 71 00:04:28,200 --> 00:04:30,720 Speaker 1: say the positives are? I mean, I look, I think 72 00:04:30,800 --> 00:04:34,440 Speaker 1: it's it's really interesting and and and kind of cool 73 00:04:34,520 --> 00:04:37,640 Speaker 1: for young people to have like an entrepreneurial you know, 74 00:04:37,800 --> 00:04:41,040 Speaker 1: kind of avenue and to run their own little business 75 00:04:41,120 --> 00:04:45,720 Speaker 1: so to speak. And I have a lot of colleagues, friends, etcetera, 76 00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:49,119 Speaker 1: whose young kids, you know, make their own jewelry on 77 00:04:49,200 --> 00:04:53,200 Speaker 1: Instagram and sell it that way, or who love to 78 00:04:53,240 --> 00:04:56,640 Speaker 1: play the violin and demonstrate that in a kind of 79 00:04:56,680 --> 00:04:59,560 Speaker 1: a cool way. Like, I think there's something about it 80 00:04:59,600 --> 00:05:03,159 Speaker 1: that allows as a platform for folks to show themselves 81 00:05:03,320 --> 00:05:05,800 Speaker 1: and that can be really interesting and fun. I mean, 82 00:05:05,839 --> 00:05:09,120 Speaker 1: I can say for myself, I changed my life through 83 00:05:09,160 --> 00:05:12,440 Speaker 1: social media because I was really struggling and I felt 84 00:05:12,520 --> 00:05:16,560 Speaker 1: very alone when I was struggling with being healthy, and 85 00:05:16,600 --> 00:05:19,200 Speaker 1: I said, you know, I started a new Instagram. I 86 00:05:19,240 --> 00:05:20,920 Speaker 1: used to share one with my husband. I just said, hey, 87 00:05:20,920 --> 00:05:23,760 Speaker 1: I'm changing my life today. Follow along if you're interested 88 00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:25,800 Speaker 1: to see if I can do it, you know. So 89 00:05:25,880 --> 00:05:27,640 Speaker 1: I used it to kind of hold me accountable, and 90 00:05:27,640 --> 00:05:29,760 Speaker 1: then that ended up starting an entire business for me 91 00:05:29,839 --> 00:05:32,360 Speaker 1: after I changed my life because yes, I had people 92 00:05:32,440 --> 00:05:34,800 Speaker 1: rooting me on, but I also had people following me 93 00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:38,320 Speaker 1: because they wanted to see if I was going to fail. Yeah. Yeah, 94 00:05:38,440 --> 00:05:41,520 Speaker 1: Well you bring up another point, which is the possibility 95 00:05:41,520 --> 00:05:44,880 Speaker 1: of reaching other people in a positive way and inspiring them, 96 00:05:44,920 --> 00:05:48,839 Speaker 1: motivating them, connecting with them in like a significant way. 97 00:05:48,880 --> 00:05:50,880 Speaker 1: Like you're talking about, it's a huge thing that wasn't 98 00:05:50,880 --> 00:05:53,640 Speaker 1: available to us before. Sure, you felt really alone, and 99 00:05:53,680 --> 00:05:56,920 Speaker 1: then you realized when you post something and there's so 100 00:05:56,960 --> 00:05:59,440 Speaker 1: many people that responding, I feel that same exact way. 101 00:05:59,480 --> 00:06:01,680 Speaker 1: Thank you for saying I felt so alone or whatever 102 00:06:01,760 --> 00:06:04,159 Speaker 1: it is. So that feels good. But then, on that 103 00:06:04,279 --> 00:06:07,120 Speaker 1: same token, how do we shield our kids or even 104 00:06:07,120 --> 00:06:11,680 Speaker 1: shield ourselves from bullying on social media. I'm not sure 105 00:06:11,720 --> 00:06:15,640 Speaker 1: there's a way to fix it, because the platform itself, 106 00:06:15,760 --> 00:06:17,240 Speaker 1: you know, part of what's so nice about it is 107 00:06:17,279 --> 00:06:19,200 Speaker 1: that you can connect with a lot of people quickly, 108 00:06:19,279 --> 00:06:21,159 Speaker 1: and part of what's not so nice about it is 109 00:06:21,160 --> 00:06:22,920 Speaker 1: that you can connect with a lot of people quickly, 110 00:06:23,320 --> 00:06:26,440 Speaker 1: So negative things can come to us. And I think 111 00:06:26,480 --> 00:06:28,800 Speaker 1: we have to be really strong with our kids and 112 00:06:28,839 --> 00:06:31,840 Speaker 1: ourselves about staying grounded and centered in who we are. 113 00:06:31,920 --> 00:06:33,760 Speaker 1: We're going to put ourselves out there that that is 114 00:06:33,800 --> 00:06:37,200 Speaker 1: a possibility, and it's one of the negatives and one 115 00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:39,359 Speaker 1: of the reasons, you know, circle back to where we began. 116 00:06:39,440 --> 00:06:43,279 Speaker 1: Why there's depression, anxiety, and upset that can come social media. 117 00:06:43,640 --> 00:06:45,760 Speaker 1: How much time do you think is healthy to spend 118 00:06:45,800 --> 00:06:49,039 Speaker 1: on social media a day? That's a good question. I mean, look, 119 00:06:49,080 --> 00:06:52,200 Speaker 1: I think as if you're a youngster, you know, under eighteen, 120 00:06:52,400 --> 00:06:56,120 Speaker 1: that it should be absolutely less than an hour. I mean, 121 00:06:56,160 --> 00:06:59,160 Speaker 1: to me, thirty minutes to an hour would be more 122 00:06:59,240 --> 00:07:01,440 Speaker 1: than enough. It's part of your business. You know. That's 123 00:07:01,480 --> 00:07:05,360 Speaker 1: kind of a different analysis, But to me, it goes 124 00:07:05,400 --> 00:07:07,760 Speaker 1: along with screen time. So if we think of social 125 00:07:07,839 --> 00:07:10,520 Speaker 1: media screen time and you're monitoring your kids screen time, 126 00:07:10,840 --> 00:07:14,000 Speaker 1: maybe like an hour. Yeah, but kids aren't the only issues. 127 00:07:14,080 --> 00:07:16,360 Speaker 1: Sometimes I'll look at my phone and how much time 128 00:07:16,400 --> 00:07:18,320 Speaker 1: I was on my phone each day, and I'm like, uh, 129 00:07:18,480 --> 00:07:20,560 Speaker 1: that is a problem. I don't even want to see that. 130 00:07:20,600 --> 00:07:23,000 Speaker 1: Thank you, Phone for letting me know I'm turning you over. 131 00:07:23,080 --> 00:07:25,560 Speaker 1: I think tech abuse is a whole other issue. Adult 132 00:07:25,600 --> 00:07:27,800 Speaker 1: tech abuse is a whole other issue that needs to 133 00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:31,120 Speaker 1: be explored because I I've done a recent self check 134 00:07:31,160 --> 00:07:33,760 Speaker 1: on myself realizing I have young kids and realizing that 135 00:07:34,320 --> 00:07:37,120 Speaker 1: there was too much multitasking with a phone in my hand, 136 00:07:37,320 --> 00:07:40,720 Speaker 1: and that not being fully present is a big deal. 137 00:07:40,840 --> 00:07:44,080 Speaker 1: And so I think we have to keep ourselves accountable 138 00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:47,080 Speaker 1: and that we have tech free time with our kids 139 00:07:47,080 --> 00:07:49,640 Speaker 1: and with our spouses or partners and with our friends, 140 00:07:49,640 --> 00:07:52,120 Speaker 1: like legitimate tech free time, and that's almost non existent 141 00:07:52,120 --> 00:07:54,720 Speaker 1: when you just kind of look around people moving through 142 00:07:54,720 --> 00:07:57,920 Speaker 1: the world, for sure. Well let's bring in Jamie Kid. 143 00:07:58,240 --> 00:08:01,840 Speaker 1: She is a huge influence start travel blogger and model. 144 00:08:02,560 --> 00:08:07,280 Speaker 1: So thanks for joining us this week. Hey guys, you're like, what, 145 00:08:09,840 --> 00:08:13,200 Speaker 1: Oh my goodness, So let's let's break this down. Can 146 00:08:13,200 --> 00:08:15,400 Speaker 1: you give us a little backstory? How did this start? 147 00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:18,720 Speaker 1: You're an influencer full time, right, and my husband is 148 00:08:18,760 --> 00:08:21,000 Speaker 1: as well now, so he wasn't before, and now I 149 00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:23,080 Speaker 1: kind of brought him into the world and it's like 150 00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:25,520 Speaker 1: it's great. I mean, I love it. So I've been 151 00:08:25,560 --> 00:08:28,800 Speaker 1: I've been doing it for seven years now. I started 152 00:08:28,880 --> 00:08:31,480 Speaker 1: kind of, I guess it. Instagram really started when I 153 00:08:31,520 --> 00:08:33,839 Speaker 1: was in college, so it kind of the app came 154 00:08:33,880 --> 00:08:35,720 Speaker 1: about and I was like, what is this? And I 155 00:08:35,800 --> 00:08:38,679 Speaker 1: just kind of started you posted whatever you wanted back 156 00:08:38,720 --> 00:08:41,160 Speaker 1: then with the Instagram filter, you know, and like no 157 00:08:41,200 --> 00:08:43,760 Speaker 1: one really cared about it. And then after college I 158 00:08:43,840 --> 00:08:47,040 Speaker 1: kind of just started posting my outfits and then from 159 00:08:47,080 --> 00:08:49,679 Speaker 1: there it just kind of grew slowly to like what 160 00:08:49,720 --> 00:08:52,960 Speaker 1: it is now. And I started traveling because my husband's Australian, 161 00:08:52,960 --> 00:08:55,640 Speaker 1: so I started going to Australia and then that started 162 00:08:55,679 --> 00:08:58,560 Speaker 1: the travel part, and then from there it just kind 163 00:08:58,559 --> 00:09:01,160 Speaker 1: of became what it is now. So for those that 164 00:09:01,320 --> 00:09:04,560 Speaker 1: you know aren't familiar with what exactly an influencer is, 165 00:09:04,600 --> 00:09:06,880 Speaker 1: like what does it take to be an influencer? How 166 00:09:06,960 --> 00:09:09,240 Speaker 1: much time are you putting into it? Like are you 167 00:09:09,280 --> 00:09:13,120 Speaker 1: fully having to curate your life on Instagram? I mean yeah, 168 00:09:13,200 --> 00:09:15,160 Speaker 1: and I like I deal with the stress of like 169 00:09:15,320 --> 00:09:17,400 Speaker 1: I start to feel guilty after a couple of hours 170 00:09:17,400 --> 00:09:19,960 Speaker 1: if I have it posted a story, or if I 171 00:09:20,080 --> 00:09:22,200 Speaker 1: like a certain time of the day I haven't posted 172 00:09:22,240 --> 00:09:24,280 Speaker 1: my photo or stuff like that, like I do end 173 00:09:24,360 --> 00:09:26,520 Speaker 1: up going, oh, I need to get up early today 174 00:09:26,559 --> 00:09:28,280 Speaker 1: so that I can like do these stories that I 175 00:09:28,320 --> 00:09:30,679 Speaker 1: wanted to do, or because I need to go, you know, 176 00:09:30,880 --> 00:09:33,080 Speaker 1: do certain things throughout the day that like, I can't 177 00:09:33,080 --> 00:09:35,640 Speaker 1: just sit on the couch all day because like everyone thinks, oh, 178 00:09:35,679 --> 00:09:37,840 Speaker 1: you have all your free time, and then if I 179 00:09:37,880 --> 00:09:40,240 Speaker 1: sat out sat around all day, like people would not 180 00:09:40,280 --> 00:09:42,320 Speaker 1: be interested in my page or something. You know, you 181 00:09:42,320 --> 00:09:45,199 Speaker 1: have to always be like interesting throughout the day, if 182 00:09:45,200 --> 00:09:47,480 Speaker 1: that makes any sense, and it stresses you out, like 183 00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:49,840 Speaker 1: whereas if you have a regular job, like a nine 184 00:09:49,880 --> 00:09:51,400 Speaker 1: to five, there are moments where you can kind of 185 00:09:51,480 --> 00:09:54,079 Speaker 1: check out and nobody really knows what you're doing. And 186 00:09:54,200 --> 00:09:57,320 Speaker 1: you're an influencer, like you have to be on and yeah, 187 00:09:57,640 --> 00:09:59,360 Speaker 1: and you have to think of things to be like 188 00:09:59,559 --> 00:10:02,520 Speaker 1: keeping people interested in your page and kind of what 189 00:10:02,559 --> 00:10:04,680 Speaker 1: you're doing all day long. So how do you know, 190 00:10:04,720 --> 00:10:08,040 Speaker 1: So somebody is following a bunch of influencers, how do 191 00:10:08,080 --> 00:10:10,480 Speaker 1: you know if an influencer actually likes the things that 192 00:10:10,520 --> 00:10:16,400 Speaker 1: they're promoting. I feel, I mean, I feel like again, 193 00:10:16,440 --> 00:10:19,360 Speaker 1: like I post so much throughout like the day and 194 00:10:19,400 --> 00:10:22,080 Speaker 1: stuff that I feel like you can genuinely see things 195 00:10:22,080 --> 00:10:24,160 Speaker 1: that I like or I don't like. Like if I 196 00:10:24,240 --> 00:10:27,520 Speaker 1: randomly posted like something that was so far out of 197 00:10:27,559 --> 00:10:29,400 Speaker 1: my realm, you could tell if I probably didn't like 198 00:10:29,440 --> 00:10:32,280 Speaker 1: it or not. Or if I'm like genuinely posting it 199 00:10:32,320 --> 00:10:34,280 Speaker 1: and then all of a sudden it's like a paid thing, 200 00:10:34,480 --> 00:10:36,200 Speaker 1: you'd be like, oh, I've seen her posting a lot 201 00:10:36,240 --> 00:10:38,800 Speaker 1: about hair stuff or skin stuff, so yeah, that like 202 00:10:38,880 --> 00:10:41,800 Speaker 1: makes sense. But if it's like randomly, you know, I 203 00:10:41,840 --> 00:10:44,200 Speaker 1: can't even think of something like that. I just doesn't 204 00:10:44,240 --> 00:10:47,280 Speaker 1: Brandy very off brand, and I feel like I just 205 00:10:47,320 --> 00:10:49,640 Speaker 1: didn't make sense. Then I'm like, I don't trust you 206 00:10:49,679 --> 00:10:52,120 Speaker 1: because I've seen it even change a little bit because 207 00:10:52,160 --> 00:10:54,880 Speaker 1: now you'll see influencers they're not even having to really 208 00:10:55,120 --> 00:10:57,200 Speaker 1: talk about the product. They'll like do a funny little 209 00:10:57,280 --> 00:11:02,160 Speaker 1: quote and then just like tag the brand and I'm like, oh, okay, 210 00:11:03,040 --> 00:11:06,600 Speaker 1: plugged in right there, I see what I see you. Yeah, 211 00:11:06,640 --> 00:11:09,640 Speaker 1: I know, I feel like like i'd like I only 212 00:11:09,720 --> 00:11:12,079 Speaker 1: take on stuff that I feel like is aligned because 213 00:11:12,080 --> 00:11:14,680 Speaker 1: at this point, like with my page, I don't want 214 00:11:14,679 --> 00:11:16,880 Speaker 1: my followers to not trust me anymore and not to 215 00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:19,160 Speaker 1: feel like, oh, she's just doing this to get paid. 216 00:11:19,240 --> 00:11:21,320 Speaker 1: So you have to like also think about the other 217 00:11:21,400 --> 00:11:23,800 Speaker 1: end of like people watching you, and you have to 218 00:11:24,320 --> 00:11:26,000 Speaker 1: know that, like they're not going to trust you if 219 00:11:26,040 --> 00:11:29,080 Speaker 1: you post something that's so far out of your realm 220 00:11:29,160 --> 00:11:30,840 Speaker 1: that they'll be like, oh, I'm not going to trust 221 00:11:30,880 --> 00:11:32,440 Speaker 1: her anymore. I don't want and then you you know, 222 00:11:32,640 --> 00:11:35,160 Speaker 1: you lose your followers. Essentially. I made that mistake once 223 00:11:35,240 --> 00:11:38,800 Speaker 1: I posted something I wasn't super into and I got killed, 224 00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:45,200 Speaker 1: like they knew like phony below so bad. I was like, 225 00:11:45,800 --> 00:11:51,160 Speaker 1: and I don't ever make me do that. Why did 226 00:11:51,160 --> 00:11:53,560 Speaker 1: I say I've learned my lessons? And I was like 227 00:11:53,679 --> 00:11:55,240 Speaker 1: right at the beginning, and I was like, I will 228 00:11:55,320 --> 00:11:57,600 Speaker 1: never do that again. I'm only going to talk about 229 00:11:57,640 --> 00:12:00,560 Speaker 1: things that I actually like. It's people are is very 230 00:12:00,600 --> 00:12:03,679 Speaker 1: like smart these days. Followers aren't just like buying everything 231 00:12:03,720 --> 00:12:05,880 Speaker 1: you post. They want to feel like you genuinely like 232 00:12:05,960 --> 00:12:08,600 Speaker 1: it as well, and they've seen it correlate with your brand, 233 00:12:08,720 --> 00:12:11,800 Speaker 1: so they're you know, they're smart. They're smart. I'm figuring 234 00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:13,880 Speaker 1: it out and they know you're they know a part 235 00:12:13,920 --> 00:12:16,760 Speaker 1: of you exactly how much time do you spend on 236 00:12:16,800 --> 00:12:19,679 Speaker 1: social media day and would you ever consider it an 237 00:12:19,679 --> 00:12:22,959 Speaker 1: addiction just a job. Yeah, I'm addicted to Like I'm 238 00:12:23,000 --> 00:12:25,439 Speaker 1: even addicted to other girls like what they're doing and 239 00:12:25,480 --> 00:12:27,480 Speaker 1: I'm like, they haven't posted in a few hours. What 240 00:12:27,520 --> 00:12:29,320 Speaker 1: are they doing? Why do I not know what's going 241 00:12:29,320 --> 00:12:31,240 Speaker 1: on in their day? Like I am guilty of it 242 00:12:31,280 --> 00:12:34,280 Speaker 1: as well, like on the followers end, So I mean, 243 00:12:34,320 --> 00:12:36,679 Speaker 1: but I spend a lot of time on the back end, 244 00:12:36,800 --> 00:12:41,960 Speaker 1: like shooting stuff, editing, making videos, like you know, all 245 00:12:42,000 --> 00:12:43,520 Speaker 1: that kind of stuff, So I don't I mean, I'm 246 00:12:43,559 --> 00:12:46,040 Speaker 1: pretty much on social media all day long because it 247 00:12:46,160 --> 00:12:48,880 Speaker 1: is my job. So like I kind of justified my mind. 248 00:12:48,960 --> 00:12:51,640 Speaker 1: Everyone's out there nine to five, soe five, I should 249 00:12:51,679 --> 00:12:53,960 Speaker 1: be working as well. Like I even I wake up 250 00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:55,720 Speaker 1: at four or five am, and I like do my 251 00:12:55,760 --> 00:12:58,800 Speaker 1: workouts and I post those like I'm pretty much like 252 00:12:59,160 --> 00:13:01,480 Speaker 1: sixteen hour days, which is fine, Like I love it, 253 00:13:01,520 --> 00:13:04,640 Speaker 1: and it's it's like semi easy in a sense because 254 00:13:04,640 --> 00:13:06,400 Speaker 1: like I've been doing it for so long, so it's 255 00:13:06,440 --> 00:13:11,240 Speaker 1: kind of just my daily thing now. So have you 256 00:13:11,320 --> 00:13:15,240 Speaker 1: noticed any difference now that Instagram isn't really isn't showing 257 00:13:15,240 --> 00:13:18,080 Speaker 1: the likes or has that happened happened to me? It 258 00:13:18,120 --> 00:13:20,760 Speaker 1: doesn't happened to me either, and I genuinely like to 259 00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:23,439 Speaker 1: see likes and like for me, when company, like when 260 00:13:23,440 --> 00:13:25,199 Speaker 1: all the likes go away, it's going to be more 261 00:13:25,240 --> 00:13:28,080 Speaker 1: annoying for me to have to screenshot things send it 262 00:13:28,080 --> 00:13:29,800 Speaker 1: to companies like I already have to do that with 263 00:13:29,840 --> 00:13:32,840 Speaker 1: all my analytics. So now when you add in more 264 00:13:32,920 --> 00:13:35,240 Speaker 1: screenshots that I have to email over whereas they can 265 00:13:35,280 --> 00:13:38,680 Speaker 1: normally just go see it, it's just adding like another step, 266 00:13:38,800 --> 00:13:41,120 Speaker 1: which is so now I have to ask you, Dr Goldcher, 267 00:13:41,640 --> 00:13:44,160 Speaker 1: do you think that's kind of adds to our addiction 268 00:13:44,200 --> 00:13:46,800 Speaker 1: that we want to see the likes or that we 269 00:13:46,880 --> 00:13:48,439 Speaker 1: need to see the likes, or that's some kind of 270 00:13:48,520 --> 00:13:52,160 Speaker 1: validation to us or to the you know, brands, or 271 00:13:52,240 --> 00:13:54,720 Speaker 1: of course, I mean, where else do we get such 272 00:13:54,720 --> 00:13:59,880 Speaker 1: a tangible like evaluation of ourselves. I feel like it's 273 00:13:59,880 --> 00:14:03,280 Speaker 1: a little bit of a a positive criticism also bad. 274 00:14:03,320 --> 00:14:05,560 Speaker 1: But if a photo doesn't do well, and then I 275 00:14:05,640 --> 00:14:07,360 Speaker 1: kind of go, oh, you know what, I kind of 276 00:14:07,400 --> 00:14:09,400 Speaker 1: that deserve to not do very well because I didn't 277 00:14:09,440 --> 00:14:12,080 Speaker 1: like make it really creative or I didn't really like 278 00:14:12,160 --> 00:14:14,040 Speaker 1: to do the best that I probably could have. Like 279 00:14:14,040 --> 00:14:17,440 Speaker 1: I feel like your followers followers also know like when 280 00:14:17,440 --> 00:14:20,280 Speaker 1: you when you're half asking it. Yeah, no, seriously, And 281 00:14:20,320 --> 00:14:22,560 Speaker 1: it keeps you accountable because I could just sit here 282 00:14:22,600 --> 00:14:24,480 Speaker 1: and stand in front of a white wall, take my photo, 283 00:14:24,520 --> 00:14:27,280 Speaker 1: post it and be done. But like if it won't 284 00:14:27,280 --> 00:14:30,200 Speaker 1: do well because it's not like a beautiful backdrop or 285 00:14:30,240 --> 00:14:33,000 Speaker 1: stuff that I'm really really good at, because maybe I 286 00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:34,760 Speaker 1: just got lazy that day and just wanted to get 287 00:14:34,800 --> 00:14:38,040 Speaker 1: that thing over with. And so it keeps you accountable 288 00:14:38,040 --> 00:14:40,760 Speaker 1: as well, like on the creative side, to not half 289 00:14:40,760 --> 00:14:43,800 Speaker 1: ask your content. But I think that's a really interesting 290 00:14:44,040 --> 00:14:48,320 Speaker 1: nuanced viewpoint, right, is that it is your career. Yeah 291 00:14:48,360 --> 00:14:50,440 Speaker 1: it is, and you're gauging part of the likes and 292 00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:55,120 Speaker 1: lack of likes related to the creativity and the art 293 00:14:55,200 --> 00:14:57,440 Speaker 1: that you're putting in. Yeah, exactly, because some of my 294 00:14:57,560 --> 00:15:01,680 Speaker 1: most like liked photos are the most creative photos I've 295 00:15:01,680 --> 00:15:06,000 Speaker 1: ever created, so obviously, like that resonates with followers that like, wow, 296 00:15:06,040 --> 00:15:08,800 Speaker 1: like you really like did it? Like you made like 297 00:15:08,840 --> 00:15:12,000 Speaker 1: a really artistic, beautiful photo. Obviously, the ad photos don't 298 00:15:12,040 --> 00:15:13,960 Speaker 1: do very well because you can't do like a creative 299 00:15:14,480 --> 00:15:16,680 Speaker 1: something with like a purse or whatever you know you can, 300 00:15:16,840 --> 00:15:21,920 Speaker 1: but yeah, like followers are more appreciative of the creative stuff. 301 00:15:21,960 --> 00:15:24,840 Speaker 1: So then that like gears me to do more creative 302 00:15:24,880 --> 00:15:28,480 Speaker 1: and like really work hard for those posts because I 303 00:15:28,520 --> 00:15:30,760 Speaker 1: wanted to do well so well. That leads me to 304 00:15:30,800 --> 00:15:33,560 Speaker 1: the next question. So I know, for myself, I will 305 00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:36,880 Speaker 1: read all the comments when it's on my actual post, 306 00:15:37,240 --> 00:15:38,800 Speaker 1: but I don't go into my d M s. That's 307 00:15:38,840 --> 00:15:41,360 Speaker 1: like a deep, dark, dirty place for me. I'm like, like, 308 00:15:41,440 --> 00:15:43,680 Speaker 1: go in. But I'm also on a TV show where 309 00:15:43,680 --> 00:15:45,520 Speaker 1: people have like big opinions, and I'm like, you know what, 310 00:15:45,560 --> 00:15:48,240 Speaker 1: I don't really need all of those opinions. Do you go? 311 00:15:48,400 --> 00:15:50,000 Speaker 1: Do you look at all of the d my d 312 00:15:50,200 --> 00:15:53,520 Speaker 1: M s are answered all day long? I cannot have 313 00:15:53,600 --> 00:15:55,920 Speaker 1: a re crust. It bothers me to no end to 314 00:15:56,000 --> 00:15:58,880 Speaker 1: go to sleep with any requests in there I answer 315 00:15:59,440 --> 00:16:02,400 Speaker 1: or I decline creepy ones. But like I answer every 316 00:16:02,440 --> 00:16:04,720 Speaker 1: single one of my followers all day long, and it's 317 00:16:04,760 --> 00:16:08,320 Speaker 1: like another level of an influence that I don't know 318 00:16:08,480 --> 00:16:12,200 Speaker 1: because for me, I'm like a TV personality or health coach, 319 00:16:12,240 --> 00:16:14,760 Speaker 1: so I don't have to do that. And I like 320 00:16:14,800 --> 00:16:17,760 Speaker 1: have to protect myself. Yeah see, and I guess I 321 00:16:17,800 --> 00:16:19,680 Speaker 1: get mean stuff too. And I really like I keep 322 00:16:19,720 --> 00:16:23,240 Speaker 1: my page very like Switzerland. It's very you know, I 323 00:16:23,240 --> 00:16:27,840 Speaker 1: don't must be well. I try so that I don't 324 00:16:27,880 --> 00:16:30,680 Speaker 1: get you know, political opinions are your religion. I don't 325 00:16:30,680 --> 00:16:33,040 Speaker 1: get a lot of that backlash in my page. I 326 00:16:33,120 --> 00:16:36,360 Speaker 1: keep it very like you know, middle ground, so that 327 00:16:36,400 --> 00:16:38,240 Speaker 1: I don't get a lot of the mean stuff. But 328 00:16:38,840 --> 00:16:40,680 Speaker 1: I have people who like I have cats, and people 329 00:16:40,840 --> 00:16:44,360 Speaker 1: decide something I did my cats a little overweight? Oh 330 00:16:44,480 --> 00:16:47,080 Speaker 1: I had, you know, And I'm like get await, Like 331 00:16:47,280 --> 00:16:49,800 Speaker 1: I know, I get really upset when people comment anything 332 00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:52,440 Speaker 1: about my kids. I'm like blocked. I'm like, would you 333 00:16:52,480 --> 00:16:55,200 Speaker 1: like somebody to say that about your kid? No? So yeah, 334 00:16:55,240 --> 00:16:57,120 Speaker 1: I get the block a few. But I spend all 335 00:16:57,200 --> 00:17:00,400 Speaker 1: day long talking to my followers answering questions. Is because 336 00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:02,200 Speaker 1: I want them to trust me. And I'm just a 337 00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:04,440 Speaker 1: normal person, like I'm not over here on my high horse, 338 00:17:04,520 --> 00:17:08,480 Speaker 1: like I'm too busy for you. Like I like, I 339 00:17:08,520 --> 00:17:10,840 Speaker 1: spent a couple of hours before bed answering everyone just 340 00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:14,159 Speaker 1: to make sure that like stuff like answers you know, 341 00:17:14,240 --> 00:17:18,280 Speaker 1: are answered. So you have to be honest, here, do 342 00:17:18,320 --> 00:17:25,639 Speaker 1: you ever post photos without using a filter? Alternation? Looking 343 00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:29,000 Speaker 1: at you, you are beautiful and you have like amazing skin. 344 00:17:29,640 --> 00:17:32,199 Speaker 1: So like I have to ask you, Dr Gouldcher, like, 345 00:17:32,280 --> 00:17:35,560 Speaker 1: what is it in us that we as a community 346 00:17:35,640 --> 00:17:37,520 Speaker 1: do this? Like I will even the girls here, no, 347 00:17:38,080 --> 00:17:40,760 Speaker 1: when we take our pictures, I'm like, hey, subtle filter please. 348 00:17:43,160 --> 00:17:46,440 Speaker 1: I mean, it's just this this human balance I suppose 349 00:17:46,480 --> 00:17:49,359 Speaker 1: of all of us wanting to put our best foot forward, 350 00:17:49,480 --> 00:17:52,480 Speaker 1: and I think there's a healthy aspect to it, and 351 00:17:52,840 --> 00:17:55,960 Speaker 1: knowing that we're going to be evaluated, you know, or 352 00:17:56,000 --> 00:17:58,840 Speaker 1: responded to. In such a huge domain, it's hard not 353 00:17:58,880 --> 00:18:04,560 Speaker 1: to have level of insecurity or anxiety and wanting to 354 00:18:04,640 --> 00:18:06,760 Speaker 1: kind of shure up what we're putting out in the 355 00:18:06,840 --> 00:18:10,080 Speaker 1: world to guard against. But it's crazy. Anytime I post 356 00:18:10,119 --> 00:18:11,760 Speaker 1: a photo where I have no makeup on and no 357 00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:13,919 Speaker 1: filter and I'm just like, hey guy, you know whatever 358 00:18:13,960 --> 00:18:16,520 Speaker 1: it is, Everybody's like, thank you, God, thank you for 359 00:18:16,640 --> 00:18:20,000 Speaker 1: posting now, oh wow, you actually have red skin? You 360 00:18:20,040 --> 00:18:24,320 Speaker 1: know whatever it is because looking at things, are looking 361 00:18:24,400 --> 00:18:26,520 Speaker 1: at a you know, an influencer, You're like, wow, their 362 00:18:26,560 --> 00:18:28,960 Speaker 1: life is perfect. There's they've never had a blemish. They've 363 00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:31,960 Speaker 1: never had this. You know, it's very hard for somebody 364 00:18:31,960 --> 00:18:34,040 Speaker 1: at home who maybe doesn't know how to use all 365 00:18:34,080 --> 00:18:38,080 Speaker 1: these filters. Well, you're revealing like the seduction of like 366 00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:40,959 Speaker 1: the pull towards the perfection and the beautiful that like 367 00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:43,480 Speaker 1: we all respond to, even well, I would even say, 368 00:18:43,520 --> 00:18:47,879 Speaker 1: like my page is like the perfect beautiful side my stories. 369 00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:50,240 Speaker 1: I'm over here with my face mask on and I 370 00:18:50,359 --> 00:18:52,560 Speaker 1: like never have makeup on and half my stories and 371 00:18:52,600 --> 00:18:55,880 Speaker 1: I'm like in my pajamas, Like okay, perfect that you're 372 00:18:55,920 --> 00:18:58,400 Speaker 1: giving the balance. Yeah, so people see that like I'm 373 00:18:58,440 --> 00:19:00,760 Speaker 1: a bum when I'm at home and then when I'm 374 00:19:00,800 --> 00:19:03,120 Speaker 1: on like you know, in a pretty photo, like obviously 375 00:19:03,160 --> 00:19:05,560 Speaker 1: I worked hard for that, but like I added them 376 00:19:05,600 --> 00:19:07,680 Speaker 1: to like make the clothes look really good and to 377 00:19:07,880 --> 00:19:10,399 Speaker 1: like bring out colors and stuff like that. But I 378 00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:13,720 Speaker 1: don't do you think that we should be required to 379 00:19:13,920 --> 00:19:17,280 Speaker 1: tell our followers when there's a filter or face tune 380 00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:19,760 Speaker 1: or whatever on anything, Like it's pretty obvious if you're 381 00:19:19,800 --> 00:19:22,280 Speaker 1: like honest, aren't they don't think it's obvious? Like I 382 00:19:22,359 --> 00:19:24,480 Speaker 1: don't post a photo with like the subtle filter and 383 00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:26,760 Speaker 1: everyone's like, how is your skin so smooth? And I 384 00:19:26,760 --> 00:19:29,159 Speaker 1: read back the subtle filter. It even says the filter 385 00:19:29,280 --> 00:19:32,359 Speaker 1: at the top, like sometimes you're like, come on, I'm like, 386 00:19:32,600 --> 00:19:34,480 Speaker 1: how are your lashes so long? I'm like, it says 387 00:19:34,560 --> 00:19:40,560 Speaker 1: I lashed exactly. They're giving us away, like do your research, guys, 388 00:19:40,800 --> 00:19:44,639 Speaker 1: No one's perfect. Um, how do you so? How do 389 00:19:44,680 --> 00:19:47,480 Speaker 1: you deal with any of the negativity? I mean, I'm 390 00:19:47,520 --> 00:19:49,280 Speaker 1: not gonna lie. It does get to me. I've had 391 00:19:49,320 --> 00:19:52,240 Speaker 1: a few, you know, upsetting d M s recently, or 392 00:19:52,280 --> 00:19:54,600 Speaker 1: someone's like, oh, your voice is so annoying, or like 393 00:19:54,960 --> 00:19:57,040 Speaker 1: why don't you put makeup on you look like like 394 00:19:57,080 --> 00:19:59,320 Speaker 1: I've had people say that, and I'm just like I 395 00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:01,520 Speaker 1: either block it and I get upset and it sticks 396 00:20:01,560 --> 00:20:03,640 Speaker 1: with me like I can't help it. It does as 397 00:20:03,680 --> 00:20:06,359 Speaker 1: a human. Negativity does, like stick with you in any 398 00:20:06,400 --> 00:20:09,760 Speaker 1: type of criticism. So I'll block them or I'll be like, hey, 399 00:20:10,160 --> 00:20:12,000 Speaker 1: you know, I'm really sorry that you're having a bad 400 00:20:12,080 --> 00:20:14,600 Speaker 1: day and you're projecting it on me, but I really 401 00:20:14,680 --> 00:20:17,040 Speaker 1: hope your day gets better and like you spread positivity. 402 00:20:17,200 --> 00:20:19,840 Speaker 1: That's what I'll say sometimes and then they'll read it 403 00:20:19,880 --> 00:20:22,159 Speaker 1: and then I block them because I don't want any response, 404 00:20:22,200 --> 00:20:24,520 Speaker 1: but I just want to share that, like, you know, 405 00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:26,239 Speaker 1: you don't have to sit here and fight back with 406 00:20:26,280 --> 00:20:29,200 Speaker 1: people and like whatever, either block it and just drop 407 00:20:29,240 --> 00:20:31,560 Speaker 1: it or say something nice back and maybe it'll change 408 00:20:31,560 --> 00:20:33,560 Speaker 1: their day and make them a nicer person. Yeah. I 409 00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:35,600 Speaker 1: used to say nice things back, but then people would 410 00:20:35,640 --> 00:20:38,440 Speaker 1: be like, I hope you die. And I was like, 411 00:20:38,760 --> 00:20:41,000 Speaker 1: and why do the people that always say the mean things? 412 00:20:41,040 --> 00:20:43,000 Speaker 1: Why is it just like an animal in their profile 413 00:20:43,040 --> 00:20:45,960 Speaker 1: picture or like no photos and you're like someone you're 414 00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:48,760 Speaker 1: somebody that hates me? You know, you know what you're not. 415 00:20:48,800 --> 00:20:52,280 Speaker 1: You're not fooling. And now that the likes have changed, 416 00:20:52,359 --> 00:20:55,520 Speaker 1: and I've even heard that some of the following, they 417 00:20:55,560 --> 00:20:58,360 Speaker 1: may end up changing it so your followers go away. 418 00:20:58,520 --> 00:21:01,560 Speaker 1: I know, I know. Do you ever fear that, like 419 00:21:01,680 --> 00:21:04,359 Speaker 1: your job slash life of an influencer will go away? 420 00:21:04,400 --> 00:21:07,040 Speaker 1: And it's like a constant fear of mine always. But 421 00:21:07,119 --> 00:21:10,000 Speaker 1: I also feel like, like, yeah, I'm terrified all the time, 422 00:21:10,040 --> 00:21:12,040 Speaker 1: like oh what if Instagram? Because there was like a 423 00:21:12,040 --> 00:21:14,240 Speaker 1: couple of months ago when Instagram was like frozen for 424 00:21:14,320 --> 00:21:17,600 Speaker 1: like two days. You guys remember that every influencer was 425 00:21:17,640 --> 00:21:20,080 Speaker 1: like brushing up on their resume, like what have I 426 00:21:20,160 --> 00:21:22,399 Speaker 1: done in the last six years, like oh my god, 427 00:21:22,440 --> 00:21:24,880 Speaker 1: you know, but yeah, it's scary. But I also feel 428 00:21:24,880 --> 00:21:27,600 Speaker 1: like I'm also trying to monetize other avenues like YouTube 429 00:21:27,600 --> 00:21:29,880 Speaker 1: and you know, I have a jewelry company, so I'm 430 00:21:29,920 --> 00:21:32,280 Speaker 1: like really focusing on those as well, so that if 431 00:21:32,359 --> 00:21:35,000 Speaker 1: Instagram ever craps out, I have other stuff that I've 432 00:21:35,040 --> 00:21:36,720 Speaker 1: been working on. And I didn't put all my eggs 433 00:21:36,760 --> 00:21:39,359 Speaker 1: into like one basket, which is like what a lot 434 00:21:39,400 --> 00:21:42,240 Speaker 1: of girls do. And then someone's account gets hacked and 435 00:21:42,280 --> 00:21:44,280 Speaker 1: they lose all their followers. What do you have? Like, 436 00:21:44,320 --> 00:21:47,240 Speaker 1: you have nothing? So I try to kind of keep 437 00:21:47,600 --> 00:21:50,600 Speaker 1: other avenues going at the same time. So we have 438 00:21:50,680 --> 00:21:52,360 Speaker 1: to take a little break, but I want to say 439 00:21:52,440 --> 00:21:54,640 Speaker 1: thank you so much to Jamie. If you guys want 440 00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:57,040 Speaker 1: to follow along, I mean I have, and I'm obsessed. 441 00:21:57,080 --> 00:22:01,119 Speaker 1: It's Jamie and Kid. So Jamie's going to stick around 442 00:22:01,119 --> 00:22:03,800 Speaker 1: and do some rapid Fire. But we're also bringing on 443 00:22:03,840 --> 00:22:08,640 Speaker 1: Alexis Haynes. She has a podcast called Recovering from Reality. 444 00:22:08,680 --> 00:22:11,240 Speaker 1: She also has a book coming out on December three. 445 00:22:11,440 --> 00:22:15,520 Speaker 1: Her story is incredible. I'm going to bring her back 446 00:22:15,560 --> 00:22:32,520 Speaker 1: at the end for some rapid fire questions. Okay, guys, 447 00:22:32,680 --> 00:22:35,560 Speaker 1: now we are here with Alexis Haynes, who has a 448 00:22:35,600 --> 00:22:39,400 Speaker 1: book coming out called Recovering from Reality. Y'all know I'm 449 00:22:39,400 --> 00:22:43,760 Speaker 1: gonna be needed to read this. Who also, Um, Alexis 450 00:22:43,840 --> 00:22:47,840 Speaker 1: has kiddos and very interesting backstory, So let's get right 451 00:22:47,880 --> 00:22:50,879 Speaker 1: into it. I'm ready, you're ready. Can you give us 452 00:22:50,920 --> 00:22:54,159 Speaker 1: a little history for some of our listeners that I 453 00:22:54,240 --> 00:22:58,879 Speaker 1: don't know your story? I know every little from Um. Yeah, 454 00:22:59,000 --> 00:23:01,000 Speaker 1: so a lot of people know me because I had 455 00:23:01,040 --> 00:23:03,919 Speaker 1: a reality TV show called Pretty Wild on E in 456 00:23:04,000 --> 00:23:09,159 Speaker 1: two thousan ten and I became kind of a part 457 00:23:09,200 --> 00:23:15,440 Speaker 1: of pop culture history. Um when I had an epic meltdown. 458 00:23:15,520 --> 00:23:17,439 Speaker 1: My sister said to me the other day, which I 459 00:23:17,440 --> 00:23:19,000 Speaker 1: think is so funny. She goes, it was like you 460 00:23:19,040 --> 00:23:22,240 Speaker 1: were having a Brittany moment on every episode, And that's 461 00:23:22,359 --> 00:23:26,480 Speaker 1: really what it was like. It was like just NonStop 462 00:23:26,600 --> 00:23:30,080 Speaker 1: chaos because on the second day of filming, I was 463 00:23:30,240 --> 00:23:34,800 Speaker 1: arrested for the blingering. So it was like I signed 464 00:23:34,920 --> 00:23:37,600 Speaker 1: a show up for a show with E that was 465 00:23:37,640 --> 00:23:40,679 Speaker 1: supposed to be about something totally different. Then on the 466 00:23:40,760 --> 00:23:43,800 Speaker 1: second day of filming, literally we were out all night 467 00:23:43,880 --> 00:23:48,320 Speaker 1: partying with Mickey Avalon getting super loaded having the best 468 00:23:48,400 --> 00:23:51,440 Speaker 1: time ever on the top of the world, and then 469 00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:55,960 Speaker 1: the next morning at about six am, door knocks and 470 00:23:56,040 --> 00:23:59,240 Speaker 1: it's like a swat team like there to arrest me. 471 00:23:59,400 --> 00:24:04,480 Speaker 1: So I my case as a I think at that time, 472 00:24:04,520 --> 00:24:07,879 Speaker 1: I was eighteen and eighteen year old heroin Addict on 473 00:24:08,119 --> 00:24:13,000 Speaker 1: national television for nine months, and it was brutal. You're 474 00:24:13,240 --> 00:24:17,960 Speaker 1: starting to make me feel less stressed. You're fine, really, 475 00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:21,760 Speaker 1: You're fine. No, no, no no, that's not to say everybody 476 00:24:21,840 --> 00:24:26,280 Speaker 1: has their struggles. For me, it was like a life 477 00:24:26,320 --> 00:24:29,199 Speaker 1: of chaos. I grew up in a family that was 478 00:24:29,240 --> 00:24:32,320 Speaker 1: really dysfunctional. There was incests that was going on. I 479 00:24:32,359 --> 00:24:34,320 Speaker 1: was being raped when I was like five years old. 480 00:24:35,520 --> 00:24:40,600 Speaker 1: My um parents divorced when I was three. My dad 481 00:24:40,720 --> 00:24:42,919 Speaker 1: was in the entertainment industry and then lost it all 482 00:24:42,920 --> 00:24:45,560 Speaker 1: and became homeless by the time I was like eleven 483 00:24:46,920 --> 00:24:50,280 Speaker 1: um and I was raped again at sixteen, I was 484 00:24:50,320 --> 00:24:54,119 Speaker 1: abused by babysitters, by my dad's girlfriends. I mean, it 485 00:24:54,280 --> 00:24:59,600 Speaker 1: was like just NonStop chaos. And then I graduated high school. 486 00:24:59,600 --> 00:25:02,400 Speaker 1: I got my g e d at sixteen, and I 487 00:25:02,520 --> 00:25:04,680 Speaker 1: left the house and I was like, I'm just gonna 488 00:25:04,680 --> 00:25:11,600 Speaker 1: become like a um music video girl. That was my goal. 489 00:25:11,680 --> 00:25:13,480 Speaker 1: I was like, I'm just going to become like music 490 00:25:13,520 --> 00:25:16,199 Speaker 1: video girl right like this, this is going to be 491 00:25:16,240 --> 00:25:20,800 Speaker 1: like my new thing. And then before you know it, Um, 492 00:25:20,840 --> 00:25:23,399 Speaker 1: I had my own reality TV show, which is really 493 00:25:23,400 --> 00:25:27,000 Speaker 1: crazy to me, and it documented all of that. It 494 00:25:27,119 --> 00:25:30,199 Speaker 1: documented Yeah, well it didn't show like any of my 495 00:25:30,280 --> 00:25:37,399 Speaker 1: previous trauma because I wasn't ready to dive into that yet. Um. 496 00:25:37,440 --> 00:25:41,520 Speaker 1: I was still very much so in like the survival mode, 497 00:25:42,119 --> 00:25:46,240 Speaker 1: coping and using mode, so I didn't have any like perspective. 498 00:25:46,960 --> 00:25:51,239 Speaker 1: And because you have suffered from drug addiction, would you 499 00:25:51,240 --> 00:25:53,399 Speaker 1: say that social media can be that same type of 500 00:25:53,400 --> 00:26:01,080 Speaker 1: addiction or oh yeah, um, I think that people all 501 00:26:01,160 --> 00:26:07,560 Speaker 1: often don't realize that. Um, any time that we're checking 502 00:26:07,560 --> 00:26:13,719 Speaker 1: out and trying to distract ourselves rather than checking in 503 00:26:13,880 --> 00:26:17,879 Speaker 1: being present. Um wow, we just really went through that fast. 504 00:26:18,840 --> 00:26:20,399 Speaker 1: I did that just kind of all caught up with 505 00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:24,560 Speaker 1: me and I was like, okay, wow, like here we are. Yeah. Absolutely, 506 00:26:24,720 --> 00:26:29,760 Speaker 1: So I think that any time that I'm using anything 507 00:26:30,680 --> 00:26:34,520 Speaker 1: um as a crutch or a distraction, it's like I'm 508 00:26:34,560 --> 00:26:37,520 Speaker 1: trying to not be present in my body like where 509 00:26:38,080 --> 00:26:42,000 Speaker 1: I'm at, you know. And so I say something that 510 00:26:42,119 --> 00:26:45,600 Speaker 1: on my podcast a lot that I think is pretty controversial, 511 00:26:45,640 --> 00:26:47,440 Speaker 1: but it shouldn't be. Like, in a weird way, we're 512 00:26:47,480 --> 00:26:50,920 Speaker 1: all addicted to something these days, and it's because we're 513 00:26:50,960 --> 00:26:55,560 Speaker 1: so disconnected from each other and we idolize and place 514 00:26:55,720 --> 00:26:59,480 Speaker 1: the individual as being more important as the collective and 515 00:26:59,520 --> 00:27:02,080 Speaker 1: so as a species, like, we were never able to 516 00:27:02,160 --> 00:27:05,920 Speaker 1: survive like that, and so we always had to operate 517 00:27:05,960 --> 00:27:10,200 Speaker 1: in tribes and so now we're operating as individuals, right, 518 00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:13,080 Speaker 1: and we're placing so much focus on the individual, and 519 00:27:13,119 --> 00:27:19,120 Speaker 1: so we're seeing depression rates skyrocketing, um abuse rates skyrocketing, 520 00:27:19,200 --> 00:27:24,040 Speaker 1: drug addictions skyrocketing. And you can be addicted to your phone, 521 00:27:24,480 --> 00:27:29,880 Speaker 1: to sex, to working out, to working to drugs, to alcohol, 522 00:27:29,920 --> 00:27:33,520 Speaker 1: to relationships, to people, to whatever it might be. It's 523 00:27:33,600 --> 00:27:39,520 Speaker 1: really easy to want to check out and that same token, 524 00:27:39,520 --> 00:27:42,800 Speaker 1: I mean, I saw your post from today where you're 525 00:27:42,840 --> 00:27:46,280 Speaker 1: able to kind of share your history but also help others, 526 00:27:46,640 --> 00:27:49,119 Speaker 1: and that do you find that though, as a positive 527 00:27:49,160 --> 00:27:51,399 Speaker 1: to the social media, that you're able to help change 528 00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:54,800 Speaker 1: people's lives by just a post. Yeah, I think it's 529 00:27:55,040 --> 00:27:57,080 Speaker 1: um As I was walking in here, I'm sorry in 530 00:27:57,160 --> 00:28:00,760 Speaker 1: my head and my phone somebody, it's somebody DM me 531 00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:03,520 Speaker 1: and goes I heard your interview on Juicy Scoop and 532 00:28:03,560 --> 00:28:07,439 Speaker 1: I decided to quit smoking OxyS every day and I've 533 00:28:07,600 --> 00:28:11,919 Speaker 1: completely got off pain pills because of that interview. And 534 00:28:11,960 --> 00:28:16,240 Speaker 1: I get these messages literally all day long, and people 535 00:28:16,320 --> 00:28:19,200 Speaker 1: ask me often like do you regret your past? Do 536 00:28:19,240 --> 00:28:22,640 Speaker 1: you if you could take it all back and just 537 00:28:23,359 --> 00:28:26,960 Speaker 1: have a fresh start with you. My answers always and 538 00:28:27,040 --> 00:28:32,240 Speaker 1: will always be no, because despite the fact that it's 539 00:28:32,280 --> 00:28:35,360 Speaker 1: been really painful for me and other people that I've harmed, 540 00:28:35,400 --> 00:28:40,239 Speaker 1: obviously I'm now able to help the masses in a 541 00:28:40,280 --> 00:28:42,440 Speaker 1: weird way. And that's not to like toot my own 542 00:28:42,440 --> 00:28:47,640 Speaker 1: horn or to sound like not humble. I'm just saying 543 00:28:47,680 --> 00:28:51,000 Speaker 1: that social media for me and and my podcast and 544 00:28:51,120 --> 00:28:55,240 Speaker 1: going on podcasts like this and having this platform allows 545 00:28:55,280 --> 00:28:57,720 Speaker 1: me to have dialogue with people where it's like, if 546 00:28:57,760 --> 00:28:59,920 Speaker 1: you've been raped as a child, you can survive it. 547 00:29:00,400 --> 00:29:02,440 Speaker 1: If you've been raped as a team, you can survive it. 548 00:29:02,480 --> 00:29:05,400 Speaker 1: If you've dealt with divorce, you can survive it. If 549 00:29:05,520 --> 00:29:08,640 Speaker 1: you've dealt with addiction, you can survive it. If I 550 00:29:08,680 --> 00:29:12,240 Speaker 1: could survive it on national television in front of millions 551 00:29:12,240 --> 00:29:15,680 Speaker 1: of people every single week. You can too. But not 552 00:29:15,760 --> 00:29:19,360 Speaker 1: only that, you're also able to be open and vulnerable 553 00:29:19,480 --> 00:29:23,760 Speaker 1: and talk and feeling. That came with a lot of 554 00:29:23,800 --> 00:29:26,480 Speaker 1: time when I so what I ended up having. I 555 00:29:26,480 --> 00:29:28,320 Speaker 1: took a plea deal because I was like, I can't 556 00:29:28,360 --> 00:29:31,720 Speaker 1: fight a trial on while I'm shooting a para one 557 00:29:31,720 --> 00:29:34,600 Speaker 1: every day, Like it's just not doable. So I took 558 00:29:34,640 --> 00:29:38,040 Speaker 1: a plea deal and I went to jail for a summer. 559 00:29:39,040 --> 00:29:43,800 Speaker 1: And when I um got out of jail, I could 560 00:29:43,840 --> 00:29:50,360 Speaker 1: clearly see that, like my relationship with drugs was really unhealthy. However, 561 00:29:51,600 --> 00:29:55,239 Speaker 1: I didn't have any tools to deal with all of 562 00:29:55,280 --> 00:29:58,200 Speaker 1: the trauma that I had been through, So I went 563 00:29:58,240 --> 00:30:00,800 Speaker 1: back to drinking and smoking pot, and I was like, 564 00:30:00,880 --> 00:30:04,720 Speaker 1: this is fine, Like I can handle this. I have 565 00:30:04,920 --> 00:30:07,280 Speaker 1: always been able to just have a glass of wine 566 00:30:07,520 --> 00:30:12,320 Speaker 1: with dinner or one drink with dinner, It'll be okay. Well, 567 00:30:12,360 --> 00:30:14,400 Speaker 1: within two weeks I was back to shooting at Prouin 568 00:30:14,720 --> 00:30:18,280 Speaker 1: and I was arrested again December one, two thousand tents. 569 00:30:18,280 --> 00:30:23,560 Speaker 1: So we're coming up nine years, which is crazy. Yeah, 570 00:30:23,600 --> 00:30:28,440 Speaker 1: I was arrested again, and by the grace of God, 571 00:30:28,480 --> 00:30:30,880 Speaker 1: I was facing six years in prison because I violated 572 00:30:30,880 --> 00:30:35,960 Speaker 1: my probation and the judge gave me a second chance 573 00:30:36,000 --> 00:30:39,120 Speaker 1: at life and he sent me to treatment. And so 574 00:30:40,040 --> 00:30:42,640 Speaker 1: I totally got lost off track what your question was. 575 00:30:42,680 --> 00:30:46,160 Speaker 1: I'm so sorry, but but it's very interesting. I mean, 576 00:30:46,200 --> 00:30:49,760 Speaker 1: but I I we were just talking about addiction, and 577 00:30:49,960 --> 00:30:52,600 Speaker 1: know what I mean, It is what it is. But 578 00:30:52,720 --> 00:30:56,320 Speaker 1: I think it's so interesting that social media can be 579 00:30:56,360 --> 00:30:59,160 Speaker 1: such a positive in so many ways but also can 580 00:30:59,160 --> 00:31:01,720 Speaker 1: be such a negative. Oh, that's where I was going. 581 00:31:01,840 --> 00:31:03,760 Speaker 1: So I made a conscious choice when I went to 582 00:31:03,840 --> 00:31:05,800 Speaker 1: rehab that I was not going to do anymore. I 583 00:31:05,800 --> 00:31:08,120 Speaker 1: was going to stay out of entertainment because I had 584 00:31:08,200 --> 00:31:12,760 Speaker 1: seen so many people before me do that and suck 585 00:31:12,880 --> 00:31:17,360 Speaker 1: up not I shouldn't say up relapse, and for me, 586 00:31:17,440 --> 00:31:19,600 Speaker 1: I knew I was going to die like that was it, 587 00:31:19,720 --> 00:31:24,000 Speaker 1: Like I've overdosed, I'm shooting up heroin. At this point, um, 588 00:31:24,440 --> 00:31:28,600 Speaker 1: I am abusing myself, my body and others Like I 589 00:31:28,720 --> 00:31:31,040 Speaker 1: knew that this was game over for me, and so 590 00:31:31,080 --> 00:31:36,600 Speaker 1: I made a conscious decision that staying away from UM 591 00:31:36,800 --> 00:31:39,960 Speaker 1: this arena was important for me. So I did that, 592 00:31:40,760 --> 00:31:43,000 Speaker 1: and then in the last kind of couple of years, 593 00:31:43,760 --> 00:31:47,920 Speaker 1: I felt this calling to return, but in my own way, 594 00:31:48,360 --> 00:31:54,040 Speaker 1: and I could not stand by and watch the statistics 595 00:31:54,200 --> 00:31:56,160 Speaker 1: keep going up and up and up. We're now at 596 00:31:56,200 --> 00:31:59,440 Speaker 1: over eighty thou people a year dying of drugs and 597 00:31:59,480 --> 00:32:04,720 Speaker 1: I'll call dragon alcohol related deaths and um mental illness 598 00:32:04,800 --> 00:32:07,840 Speaker 1: and is on the rise to and just sit by 599 00:32:07,840 --> 00:32:10,880 Speaker 1: and like, you know, continue to be a housewife, which 600 00:32:10,920 --> 00:32:14,040 Speaker 1: was great, right, like because another big mission of mine, 601 00:32:14,440 --> 00:32:18,320 Speaker 1: among the millions of others, is to break the generational 602 00:32:18,320 --> 00:32:21,160 Speaker 1: trauma curse that's been happening my family for generations. And 603 00:32:21,160 --> 00:32:23,600 Speaker 1: I'm a mother to two daughters and so that's been 604 00:32:23,600 --> 00:32:26,120 Speaker 1: my main priority. So speaking on that, how do you 605 00:32:26,120 --> 00:32:29,240 Speaker 1: feel about either having your kids on your social media 606 00:32:29,640 --> 00:32:33,560 Speaker 1: or letting them have their own? Yeah? So, um, I 607 00:32:33,640 --> 00:32:38,920 Speaker 1: have my kids on my social media, but not very often. Um, 608 00:32:39,080 --> 00:32:43,520 Speaker 1: And I think my intention right now is that I 609 00:32:43,560 --> 00:32:46,080 Speaker 1: will have I will get my kids phones at an 610 00:32:46,120 --> 00:32:49,800 Speaker 1: appropriate age. But they're going to get like slip phones. 611 00:32:50,120 --> 00:32:55,320 Speaker 1: Oh doctor culture, They're not getting smartphones. They're not. But 612 00:32:55,400 --> 00:32:56,920 Speaker 1: I think they can get in trouble no matter what. 613 00:32:56,960 --> 00:33:00,680 Speaker 1: But we talked about social media, isn't really your ideal 614 00:33:00,720 --> 00:33:03,880 Speaker 1: age would be sixteen and over? But what about just 615 00:33:04,040 --> 00:33:07,720 Speaker 1: phones in general. Yeah, I'm with you on the flip phone. 616 00:33:07,840 --> 00:33:10,160 Speaker 1: I mean in terms of being able to contact your 617 00:33:10,240 --> 00:33:11,760 Speaker 1: kid and locate where they are and let them know 618 00:33:11,800 --> 00:33:13,880 Speaker 1: if you're running later that your dad's picking them up 619 00:33:13,960 --> 00:33:17,000 Speaker 1: or whatever. That's great, and a flip phone can accomplish that. 620 00:33:17,440 --> 00:33:20,200 Speaker 1: I mean, I think a kid having a smartphone with 621 00:33:20,840 --> 00:33:24,120 Speaker 1: a lot of apps blocked and just uh you know, 622 00:33:24,240 --> 00:33:28,960 Speaker 1: certain um access to more benign things might be finded around. 623 00:33:30,600 --> 00:33:34,000 Speaker 1: I have friends that they now what's so great about 624 00:33:34,000 --> 00:33:36,400 Speaker 1: the eye cloud thing is that as a family, you 625 00:33:36,440 --> 00:33:41,800 Speaker 1: can see everybody's stuff, right, So she can read her 626 00:33:41,800 --> 00:33:45,360 Speaker 1: son's text messages, she can see what apps are on 627 00:33:45,440 --> 00:33:48,520 Speaker 1: the phone, she can see what, you know, even what 628 00:33:48,640 --> 00:33:51,480 Speaker 1: he's looking at on the internet. And I think that's 629 00:33:51,480 --> 00:33:56,240 Speaker 1: really great. I think it's a responsibility thing. And um, 630 00:33:56,360 --> 00:33:59,640 Speaker 1: I talk a lot about the brain because it's something 631 00:33:59,680 --> 00:34:02,520 Speaker 1: that I kind of geek out on. And children develop 632 00:34:02,600 --> 00:34:06,600 Speaker 1: their prefrontal cortex around ten. Their prefrontal cortex is what's 633 00:34:07,080 --> 00:34:10,239 Speaker 1: kind of like your decision maker, like that thing that 634 00:34:10,280 --> 00:34:13,160 Speaker 1: allows you to pause before you do something, correct me 635 00:34:13,200 --> 00:34:16,120 Speaker 1: if I'm wrong. But it starts really to develop around ten, 636 00:34:16,239 --> 00:34:19,560 Speaker 1: doesn't stop until you're in your mid to late twenties, 637 00:34:19,880 --> 00:34:24,560 Speaker 1: So to give a child a phone at ten when 638 00:34:24,600 --> 00:34:28,760 Speaker 1: they literally are just developing that ability to pause. And 639 00:34:29,719 --> 00:34:33,080 Speaker 1: you know, I live out near Malibu and I've heard 640 00:34:33,160 --> 00:34:38,640 Speaker 1: stories of second graders sending pictures in their underwear to 641 00:34:38,800 --> 00:34:42,080 Speaker 1: other people on their phones, and I'm like, it's not 642 00:34:42,160 --> 00:34:45,120 Speaker 1: the child's fault, it's the parents fault. And just so, 643 00:34:45,320 --> 00:34:48,560 Speaker 1: it is illegal. Just so you parents out there, it 644 00:34:48,719 --> 00:34:52,040 Speaker 1: is illegal, So tell your kids that because if that 645 00:34:52,080 --> 00:34:54,360 Speaker 1: were to get out there and somebody were to see it, 646 00:34:54,400 --> 00:34:56,640 Speaker 1: they could be arrested. And I don't think a lot 647 00:34:56,680 --> 00:34:58,040 Speaker 1: of kids know that, and I don't think a lot 648 00:34:58,040 --> 00:35:00,160 Speaker 1: of parents know that well. And you can tell you're 649 00:35:00,239 --> 00:35:03,400 Speaker 1: ten year old that all day long. But again, until 650 00:35:03,480 --> 00:35:06,920 Speaker 1: that prefrontal cortex is functioning at a level where they 651 00:35:06,920 --> 00:35:11,640 Speaker 1: can think through before they take action, it's like, that's 652 00:35:11,640 --> 00:35:14,399 Speaker 1: why we have to tell you have six seven, right, 653 00:35:14,440 --> 00:35:18,480 Speaker 1: how old are your kids? They're even so exactly so 654 00:35:18,520 --> 00:35:20,600 Speaker 1: it's like how many times do you have to say 655 00:35:20,680 --> 00:35:22,880 Speaker 1: pick up your room? Clean up? This is why we 656 00:35:22,920 --> 00:35:25,040 Speaker 1: don't do this. You have to repeat yourself all day long. 657 00:35:25,080 --> 00:35:27,600 Speaker 1: You're like a broken record. And it's literally because their 658 00:35:27,640 --> 00:35:32,359 Speaker 1: brains can only retain so much. And if you're given 659 00:35:32,400 --> 00:35:35,080 Speaker 1: the option to play right or to have some sort 660 00:35:35,120 --> 00:35:38,279 Speaker 1: of reward over doing something that they have to do, 661 00:35:38,440 --> 00:35:41,279 Speaker 1: They're always going to choose the reward. No. And I've 662 00:35:41,320 --> 00:35:43,680 Speaker 1: noticed if so I let my kids have like a 663 00:35:43,760 --> 00:35:45,600 Speaker 1: tablet in the car if we're going on long drive, 664 00:35:45,719 --> 00:35:49,000 Speaker 1: just for my own sanity. But then we get out 665 00:35:49,040 --> 00:35:52,000 Speaker 1: of the car and there's zombies. They act like different 666 00:35:52,040 --> 00:35:54,840 Speaker 1: human beings are acting like brads nenative and I'm like, 667 00:35:54,880 --> 00:35:57,239 Speaker 1: oh my gosh, this is from roadblocks or whatever it 668 00:35:57,360 --> 00:36:00,960 Speaker 1: is they or weird YouTube videos of a's playing with toys, 669 00:36:01,000 --> 00:36:03,880 Speaker 1: and I'm like, what is happening? You know? And so 670 00:36:04,000 --> 00:36:06,080 Speaker 1: I learned like that is really the only time we 671 00:36:06,120 --> 00:36:07,400 Speaker 1: do it. I used to be a little bit more 672 00:36:07,480 --> 00:36:10,040 Speaker 1: lax in the house. Okay, we'll do one hour day 673 00:36:10,040 --> 00:36:11,759 Speaker 1: on the weekends. Now I'm like, no, if we're in 674 00:36:11,800 --> 00:36:13,319 Speaker 1: the car for more than an hour, you can have it. 675 00:36:13,360 --> 00:36:17,200 Speaker 1: That's it. But I mean it's crazy. And also do 676 00:36:17,280 --> 00:36:22,640 Speaker 1: you get mom shamed at all on Instagram? And what 677 00:36:22,800 --> 00:36:25,959 Speaker 1: I think that is? And also dr culture feel free 678 00:36:26,000 --> 00:36:28,040 Speaker 1: to weigh in what do you think it is as 679 00:36:28,120 --> 00:36:30,360 Speaker 1: moms or even for somebody that's not a mom. I 680 00:36:30,360 --> 00:36:32,800 Speaker 1: mean even Jamie who was on with me earlier, she 681 00:36:32,880 --> 00:36:35,680 Speaker 1: gets shamed for her cat because her cats a little hat. 682 00:36:35,960 --> 00:36:38,920 Speaker 1: I think that I think we live in a society 683 00:36:38,960 --> 00:36:42,799 Speaker 1: now where people just like to have people really like 684 00:36:42,880 --> 00:36:45,920 Speaker 1: to be offended, and they really like to share their 685 00:36:45,920 --> 00:36:49,960 Speaker 1: opinion because they don't feel validated in their own lives, 686 00:36:50,000 --> 00:36:52,400 Speaker 1: and so social media is kind of like a perfect 687 00:36:52,440 --> 00:36:57,239 Speaker 1: storm to be able to do that. So my three 688 00:36:57,320 --> 00:37:00,600 Speaker 1: year old, for instance, has she we had a very 689 00:37:00,680 --> 00:37:03,520 Speaker 1: challenging pregnancy. She wasn't supposed to make it. She had 690 00:37:04,719 --> 00:37:07,239 Speaker 1: up until twenty weeks with her, they thought she had 691 00:37:07,239 --> 00:37:09,960 Speaker 1: tries to meet thirteen, which meant that she literally would 692 00:37:09,960 --> 00:37:14,000 Speaker 1: die at birth. And she had all of these different 693 00:37:14,040 --> 00:37:16,879 Speaker 1: issues and we're not talking tries with down SYDMA trying 694 00:37:16,880 --> 00:37:20,879 Speaker 1: to try they have cyclops eyes and their organs are all. Yeah, 695 00:37:20,920 --> 00:37:22,960 Speaker 1: it was horrible, but I can. I decided that I 696 00:37:22,960 --> 00:37:25,160 Speaker 1: was going to continue with the pregnancy, and by a miracle, 697 00:37:25,560 --> 00:37:29,480 Speaker 1: she had this very rare situation where her placenta had 698 00:37:29,520 --> 00:37:32,040 Speaker 1: different DNA than she did. So they kept testing the 699 00:37:32,040 --> 00:37:34,560 Speaker 1: placenta with CVS tests and all the stuff, and it 700 00:37:34,600 --> 00:37:38,520 Speaker 1: turned out she was totally fine. Now she has gross 701 00:37:38,560 --> 00:37:42,319 Speaker 1: motor delay issues. She has a full, incomplete underbyte where 702 00:37:42,360 --> 00:37:45,799 Speaker 1: she can't talk, she has eating issues. And I can't 703 00:37:45,800 --> 00:37:47,440 Speaker 1: tell you how much that I get the fact that 704 00:37:47,480 --> 00:37:49,400 Speaker 1: she's three and still on a bottle. I'm like, but 705 00:37:49,480 --> 00:37:52,399 Speaker 1: she can't drink from a cup, and you guys don't 706 00:37:52,440 --> 00:37:55,839 Speaker 1: know her situation. She has a full headgear now and 707 00:37:55,880 --> 00:37:58,319 Speaker 1: like all of us, yeah, so everybody just wants to 708 00:37:58,360 --> 00:38:02,400 Speaker 1: have there and immediately right when you told me that story, 709 00:38:02,680 --> 00:38:05,480 Speaker 1: you you've been trained where you almost have to justify it, 710 00:38:06,160 --> 00:38:08,319 Speaker 1: where there isn't a need to justify. I mean, the 711 00:38:08,360 --> 00:38:11,640 Speaker 1: same thing happens. My son has just a list and 712 00:38:11,719 --> 00:38:13,560 Speaker 1: people are like, you need to get that checked and 713 00:38:13,600 --> 00:38:15,400 Speaker 1: you need to figure that out, and what's wrong with you? 714 00:38:15,400 --> 00:38:17,239 Speaker 1: And I'm like, you don't think I've talked to his 715 00:38:17,360 --> 00:38:19,920 Speaker 1: doctor about this. You don't think that he's not my 716 00:38:20,080 --> 00:38:24,760 Speaker 1: primary concern, like like honestly, or even people get upset 717 00:38:24,800 --> 00:38:28,359 Speaker 1: over something as silly as like a haircut. What's wrong 718 00:38:28,400 --> 00:38:30,439 Speaker 1: with you? Your son's hairs in his eyes, he doesn't 719 00:38:30,480 --> 00:38:32,960 Speaker 1: want a haircut right now. And you know what, I 720 00:38:32,960 --> 00:38:35,399 Speaker 1: I think I'm in my so my youngest daughter does 721 00:38:35,480 --> 00:38:39,720 Speaker 1: identify as her the opposite sex that she was assigned 722 00:38:39,719 --> 00:38:42,120 Speaker 1: at birth. Because she's three and a half and she 723 00:38:42,520 --> 00:38:46,120 Speaker 1: identifies as a boy. She wants to be Batman. Her 724 00:38:46,440 --> 00:38:49,319 Speaker 1: boy bed is a big boy bed. Like I have 725 00:38:49,360 --> 00:38:52,120 Speaker 1: a feeling that I'm in for it with her, and 726 00:38:52,200 --> 00:38:54,600 Speaker 1: I'm here for it because at the end of the day, 727 00:38:55,960 --> 00:39:00,560 Speaker 1: we're making we're our children's parents, and we're going to 728 00:39:00,719 --> 00:39:04,520 Speaker 1: do everything that we think is necessary to support them. 729 00:39:04,560 --> 00:39:07,880 Speaker 1: And I honestly don't give a damn if Susie and 730 00:39:08,480 --> 00:39:12,520 Speaker 1: you know, Wisconsin has an issue has an issue with it. 731 00:39:12,920 --> 00:39:15,440 Speaker 1: I mean, the important part is that we are you know, 732 00:39:15,760 --> 00:39:17,760 Speaker 1: your kids trust that they can come to their parents 733 00:39:17,840 --> 00:39:20,880 Speaker 1: and talk to them. I think so absolutely. And you know, 734 00:39:21,000 --> 00:39:23,640 Speaker 1: I think time is changing, and I think that people 735 00:39:23,680 --> 00:39:25,560 Speaker 1: are changing, and the more that we can support our 736 00:39:25,640 --> 00:39:29,640 Speaker 1: kids and show them love, that's really what matters. And 737 00:39:29,719 --> 00:39:32,680 Speaker 1: unfortunately we have to take a little break um before 738 00:39:32,760 --> 00:39:36,360 Speaker 1: we bring in rich. But thank you so much Alexis 739 00:39:36,400 --> 00:39:38,600 Speaker 1: for sharing your story. I wish we like I want 740 00:39:38,640 --> 00:39:40,680 Speaker 1: to bring now. We have so many other topics that 741 00:39:40,800 --> 00:39:43,880 Speaker 1: we need to bring you in. Amazing, amazing, and you 742 00:39:43,880 --> 00:39:58,640 Speaker 1: can come on my podcast. Dude, I'd love that, love it. Okay, 743 00:39:58,680 --> 00:40:05,840 Speaker 1: So now it's time to drill our technology genius, Rich DeMuro. 744 00:40:06,120 --> 00:40:11,080 Speaker 1: He is rich on tech and we've got questions. Can 745 00:40:11,080 --> 00:40:13,920 Speaker 1: we get them on the line. I'm here, Thanks for 746 00:40:13,920 --> 00:40:16,319 Speaker 1: having me on. Oh wow, how do you like my intro? 747 00:40:16,360 --> 00:40:18,200 Speaker 1: I'm slightly awkward when I do them, but I try 748 00:40:18,280 --> 00:40:23,400 Speaker 1: my best. It was just perfectly awkward. That's me. So 749 00:40:23,640 --> 00:40:26,799 Speaker 1: you're an expert on anything tech related. What are the 750 00:40:27,000 --> 00:40:31,000 Speaker 1: rising trends right now on social media apps? Well, I 751 00:40:31,000 --> 00:40:33,399 Speaker 1: mean when it comes to social media, you know, as 752 00:40:33,400 --> 00:40:36,040 Speaker 1: well as everyone, Instagram is where it's at for just 753 00:40:36,120 --> 00:40:39,719 Speaker 1: about everything. I mean, the world revolves around Instagram these days. Right, 754 00:40:40,320 --> 00:40:42,759 Speaker 1: it used to be Facebook. You know, we've seen other 755 00:40:42,800 --> 00:40:46,040 Speaker 1: things come along, like you know, what's that other one 756 00:40:46,239 --> 00:40:50,120 Speaker 1: Snapchat people have heard of, right, But nowadays it's all 757 00:40:50,120 --> 00:40:53,160 Speaker 1: about Instagram and Instagram Stories and they've really just taken over. 758 00:40:53,719 --> 00:40:56,200 Speaker 1: Um And I think that that's where we're seeing the 759 00:40:56,200 --> 00:40:58,919 Speaker 1: shift of the world when it comes to media, when 760 00:40:58,920 --> 00:41:01,080 Speaker 1: it comes to influencers, when it comes to pretty much 761 00:41:01,120 --> 00:41:04,959 Speaker 1: anything related to social media, that's where it's at. And 762 00:41:05,520 --> 00:41:08,520 Speaker 1: it's interesting because Instagram is not necessarily built as a 763 00:41:08,560 --> 00:41:12,239 Speaker 1: platform for what it's being used as and you know 764 00:41:12,280 --> 00:41:15,240 Speaker 1: they're trying to change things on us with no likes. 765 00:41:15,239 --> 00:41:17,719 Speaker 1: But the reality is that is where you need to be, 766 00:41:17,840 --> 00:41:20,680 Speaker 1: and that's where people are accumulating the most followers when 767 00:41:20,719 --> 00:41:23,920 Speaker 1: it comes to making a living and also being an influencer. 768 00:41:24,480 --> 00:41:26,840 Speaker 1: So I heard, and I don't know if this is 769 00:41:26,880 --> 00:41:30,800 Speaker 1: just a rumor, but if you are posting an AD 770 00:41:30,840 --> 00:41:32,880 Speaker 1: and you're not clear and you don't use like the 771 00:41:32,920 --> 00:41:37,200 Speaker 1: paid tool or whatever it is and do hashtag ad, 772 00:41:37,239 --> 00:41:41,280 Speaker 1: than Instagram is going to punish you and like hide 773 00:41:41,320 --> 00:41:43,839 Speaker 1: your photos. Is this true or is this like one 774 00:41:43,880 --> 00:41:47,279 Speaker 1: of those myths? Well, no, I mean you could. Yeah, 775 00:41:47,600 --> 00:41:51,799 Speaker 1: you're talking about when it comes to paid placements on Instagram. 776 00:41:51,800 --> 00:41:53,880 Speaker 1: Like let's say a company pays you to do, you know, 777 00:41:54,280 --> 00:41:56,400 Speaker 1: some sort of ad where you're saying, hey, I'm getting 778 00:41:56,400 --> 00:41:59,600 Speaker 1: paid to you know, promote this product, right, and if 779 00:41:59,600 --> 00:42:02,959 Speaker 1: you don't say that, Instagram wants it's in their best 780 00:42:03,000 --> 00:42:05,760 Speaker 1: interest to crack down on you because there are federal 781 00:42:05,840 --> 00:42:09,200 Speaker 1: rules that deal with this stuff. So um, when it 782 00:42:09,200 --> 00:42:11,520 Speaker 1: comes to the FTC, the Federal Trade Commission, they have 783 00:42:11,600 --> 00:42:14,799 Speaker 1: specific rules on what you can do, what you can't do. 784 00:42:15,360 --> 00:42:18,720 Speaker 1: And the reality is is anyone cracking down in those rules. 785 00:42:18,880 --> 00:42:22,640 Speaker 1: Probably not. We've seen several cases where you know, people 786 00:42:22,640 --> 00:42:24,680 Speaker 1: have been a slap on the risk kind of thing. 787 00:42:25,040 --> 00:42:27,520 Speaker 1: But Instagram doesn't want to be put in a place 788 00:42:27,520 --> 00:42:31,959 Speaker 1: where they're gonna see federal regulations involving this stuff with them. 789 00:42:32,000 --> 00:42:34,120 Speaker 1: And that's why I think they're being uh, you know, 790 00:42:34,200 --> 00:42:35,440 Speaker 1: they want to make sure that people are on the 791 00:42:35,480 --> 00:42:37,200 Speaker 1: up and up, which I think they've They've done a 792 00:42:37,200 --> 00:42:39,319 Speaker 1: good job of giving people good tools for that. You know, 793 00:42:39,360 --> 00:42:41,840 Speaker 1: you can tag a post as promoted, you can tag 794 00:42:41,880 --> 00:42:45,879 Speaker 1: as sponsored, you know, hashtag at Obviously people use um. 795 00:42:46,000 --> 00:42:50,360 Speaker 1: Does their algorithm demote posts if they are paid or 796 00:42:50,440 --> 00:42:52,920 Speaker 1: you know, if they seem paid and they're not disclosing that. 797 00:42:53,440 --> 00:42:58,680 Speaker 1: Probably actually. And on that note, do you see that 798 00:42:58,800 --> 00:43:02,600 Speaker 1: these photo altering apps that people are using to add 799 00:43:02,760 --> 00:43:06,160 Speaker 1: to their Instagram photos or whatever it is losing their applog? 800 00:43:06,160 --> 00:43:08,480 Speaker 1: Do you think they're going to keep growing? I think 801 00:43:08,680 --> 00:43:11,840 Speaker 1: the world of social media is more about people wanting 802 00:43:11,960 --> 00:43:14,560 Speaker 1: a dose of reality. But at the same time, like 803 00:43:14,600 --> 00:43:17,239 Speaker 1: any media, you always want a little bit of non 804 00:43:17,320 --> 00:43:19,120 Speaker 1: reality because you live in like a little bit of 805 00:43:19,120 --> 00:43:21,680 Speaker 1: a fantasy world of here's where these people are traveling 806 00:43:21,760 --> 00:43:24,319 Speaker 1: and they look beautiful and here's what they're doing, and 807 00:43:24,360 --> 00:43:26,279 Speaker 1: they have the best life. And I'm sitting here at 808 00:43:26,280 --> 00:43:29,480 Speaker 1: my nine to five job surfing Instagram and looking at 809 00:43:29,520 --> 00:43:32,120 Speaker 1: Instagram stories. So I think that's always going to be 810 00:43:32,160 --> 00:43:34,960 Speaker 1: a part of it, that fantasy world. While people are 811 00:43:35,000 --> 00:43:40,200 Speaker 1: hate liking, yeah, exactly, hate liking. I like that term. 812 00:43:40,200 --> 00:43:42,680 Speaker 1: But you know, I think that people like real And 813 00:43:42,719 --> 00:43:44,440 Speaker 1: if you look at some of the most popular posts, 814 00:43:44,480 --> 00:43:47,120 Speaker 1: if you go through someone's you know, feed, and you 815 00:43:47,200 --> 00:43:49,160 Speaker 1: kind of see, like how many likes people are getting 816 00:43:49,160 --> 00:43:51,839 Speaker 1: on things. Sure, the beautiful pictures in Greece are getting 817 00:43:51,880 --> 00:43:54,200 Speaker 1: a lot of pictures, a lot of likes, but sometimes 818 00:43:54,280 --> 00:43:56,960 Speaker 1: it's that picture when they just woke up or they 819 00:43:57,000 --> 00:44:00,719 Speaker 1: share a really um, you know, real moment from their 820 00:44:00,760 --> 00:44:03,680 Speaker 1: life with their kids or their spouse that gets the 821 00:44:03,719 --> 00:44:06,600 Speaker 1: most likes. And so that tells you something. People love 822 00:44:06,680 --> 00:44:09,040 Speaker 1: the fantasy, but they also like the reality as well 823 00:44:09,080 --> 00:44:12,200 Speaker 1: because it connects with them in a way of Okay, 824 00:44:12,239 --> 00:44:13,840 Speaker 1: I got the same things happening in my life. I 825 00:44:13,920 --> 00:44:15,960 Speaker 1: gotta pick up my kids from school, I gotta do this, 826 00:44:16,239 --> 00:44:19,040 Speaker 1: and these people do that too. We like to see that. 827 00:44:19,320 --> 00:44:21,400 Speaker 1: But these apps, I think for when it comes to 828 00:44:21,440 --> 00:44:24,640 Speaker 1: like the younger generation, I think is kind of crazy 829 00:44:24,680 --> 00:44:29,080 Speaker 1: because it's a it's an unhealthy um distortion field. It's 830 00:44:29,080 --> 00:44:32,080 Speaker 1: so stuff that doesn't really exist. People in your face 831 00:44:32,320 --> 00:44:35,719 Speaker 1: creating bodies that don't even exist. They're making curves, they're 832 00:44:35,800 --> 00:44:39,120 Speaker 1: changing that, they're pretending they've never had a blemish. Of 833 00:44:39,160 --> 00:44:41,840 Speaker 1: these apps, what is the most popular right now? Like, 834 00:44:41,920 --> 00:44:45,400 Speaker 1: what's the most used one? I mean, I think I 835 00:44:45,400 --> 00:44:48,440 Speaker 1: think when it comes to kind of the affecting your face, 836 00:44:48,520 --> 00:44:51,000 Speaker 1: face tune has always been popular, that's been around forever. 837 00:44:51,320 --> 00:44:53,200 Speaker 1: I think when you see a picture that has been 838 00:44:53,239 --> 00:44:55,839 Speaker 1: face tuned, people just say, oh, that's face tunes. When 839 00:44:55,880 --> 00:44:58,359 Speaker 1: I see teeth that are super white or some of 840 00:44:58,360 --> 00:45:01,520 Speaker 1: that seems like, you know, it's an unrealistic body or 841 00:45:01,600 --> 00:45:04,480 Speaker 1: I'm just like that, how is that even possible? Um? 842 00:45:04,600 --> 00:45:07,000 Speaker 1: I think that that's a dead giveaway. But it's at 843 00:45:07,000 --> 00:45:09,560 Speaker 1: the same time, it's you know, magazines have always been 844 00:45:09,600 --> 00:45:12,520 Speaker 1: doing this, TV has been doing this, Hollywood. You know, 845 00:45:12,560 --> 00:45:15,080 Speaker 1: people have a team of people that help them look 846 00:45:15,120 --> 00:45:18,000 Speaker 1: their best, and so I feel like the average person 847 00:45:18,080 --> 00:45:20,480 Speaker 1: that's posting to Instagram feels the same way. They say, well, 848 00:45:20,480 --> 00:45:22,120 Speaker 1: why can't I look my best I'm just doing the 849 00:45:22,160 --> 00:45:24,759 Speaker 1: same exact thing that Hollywood has been doing for so 850 00:45:24,800 --> 00:45:27,279 Speaker 1: many years. That's such a good point. You always see 851 00:45:27,400 --> 00:45:30,359 Speaker 1: in the news or whatever in the media when you 852 00:45:30,400 --> 00:45:33,080 Speaker 1: find out that such and such celeb has asked to 853 00:45:33,120 --> 00:45:36,319 Speaker 1: do a cover shoot without photo touching or whatever, and 854 00:45:36,320 --> 00:45:39,279 Speaker 1: people are like, wow, they get all this applause, But 855 00:45:39,360 --> 00:45:42,000 Speaker 1: they have been doing that for years. So I mean, 856 00:45:42,520 --> 00:45:45,920 Speaker 1: Instagram is just a way for everybody to be getting 857 00:45:45,920 --> 00:45:49,839 Speaker 1: that celebrity treatment. I guess. I think the difference here 858 00:45:50,000 --> 00:45:51,759 Speaker 1: is that if you're a fifteen year old girl and 859 00:45:51,800 --> 00:45:54,920 Speaker 1: you're looking through Instagram and you see the model in 860 00:45:55,000 --> 00:45:58,279 Speaker 1: the Caribbean, you understand that they had a team of 861 00:45:58,360 --> 00:46:01,280 Speaker 1: makeup artists, and you understand that they had a million 862 00:46:01,719 --> 00:46:03,399 Speaker 1: um you know what do they call those lights? Those 863 00:46:03,440 --> 00:46:05,799 Speaker 1: reflector lights that look gold and really nice on you, 864 00:46:05,840 --> 00:46:07,600 Speaker 1: and they know that you took a thousand pictures to 865 00:46:07,600 --> 00:46:10,160 Speaker 1: get that perfect shot. But when it comes to the 866 00:46:10,200 --> 00:46:12,680 Speaker 1: average person that tries to do that same exact thing, 867 00:46:13,120 --> 00:46:15,960 Speaker 1: especially if you're a teenager, you see that other person 868 00:46:16,000 --> 00:46:18,600 Speaker 1: in your class and you see an unrealistic view of 869 00:46:18,640 --> 00:46:21,319 Speaker 1: them because they've retouched everything, and you say, oh, they're 870 00:46:21,320 --> 00:46:23,920 Speaker 1: so perfect, but the reality is they're not, and no 871 00:46:23,960 --> 00:46:26,239 Speaker 1: one is. And I think that that's the danger, is 872 00:46:26,280 --> 00:46:29,319 Speaker 1: that there used to be a divide of that's Hollywood, 873 00:46:29,640 --> 00:46:32,799 Speaker 1: this is real America. But nowadays, with these tools in 874 00:46:32,880 --> 00:46:36,719 Speaker 1: anyone's pocket, anyone can look however they want. And I 875 00:46:36,760 --> 00:46:38,959 Speaker 1: think that's kind of the scary, weird part we're looking 876 00:46:39,000 --> 00:46:44,480 Speaker 1: at here. And and your opinion, does social media affect employment? 877 00:46:44,920 --> 00:46:48,239 Speaker 1: Like I know so many younger you know, younger generations 878 00:46:48,280 --> 00:46:50,600 Speaker 1: who are posting pictures of drinking or partying or in 879 00:46:50,719 --> 00:46:54,480 Speaker 1: bathing suits or whatever, and they're not realizing the repercussions 880 00:46:54,560 --> 00:46:57,440 Speaker 1: of their future employers being able to see anything on 881 00:46:57,480 --> 00:47:00,799 Speaker 1: the Internet. Okay, well here's what's crazy about this. I 882 00:47:00,840 --> 00:47:03,759 Speaker 1: did a story with a company that kind of goes 883 00:47:03,840 --> 00:47:06,440 Speaker 1: through and when you have employees hiring, they do like 884 00:47:06,440 --> 00:47:08,839 Speaker 1: a risk assessment of those employees, so they kind of 885 00:47:09,080 --> 00:47:10,799 Speaker 1: figure out, like is this person going to be a 886 00:47:10,800 --> 00:47:14,200 Speaker 1: problem before they become a problem. And I asked them 887 00:47:14,239 --> 00:47:16,799 Speaker 1: point blank, I said, what are companies looking for? Like, 888 00:47:16,840 --> 00:47:18,319 Speaker 1: you know, you always hear like if you have a 889 00:47:18,360 --> 00:47:21,000 Speaker 1: red solo cup in your in all your Instagram shots, 890 00:47:21,040 --> 00:47:23,799 Speaker 1: like is that it? When you never work again, and 891 00:47:23,880 --> 00:47:27,239 Speaker 1: he told me that they actually companies don't even care 892 00:47:27,280 --> 00:47:29,600 Speaker 1: about drinking. Now, I'm not saying people, if you're under 893 00:47:29,600 --> 00:47:32,000 Speaker 1: twenty one to sit there and you know, be crazy, 894 00:47:32,040 --> 00:47:35,279 Speaker 1: But the reality is everyone understands that we're human and 895 00:47:35,320 --> 00:47:37,680 Speaker 1: people party. I mean, I don't know, you know, college 896 00:47:37,920 --> 00:47:40,680 Speaker 1: is you know, people have a good time in college, 897 00:47:40,719 --> 00:47:42,799 Speaker 1: and I think that everyone that ever works at a 898 00:47:42,880 --> 00:47:46,439 Speaker 1: company knows that. And it's not unheard of to see 899 00:47:46,480 --> 00:47:48,960 Speaker 1: someone now back in the day, do we all have, 900 00:47:49,160 --> 00:47:52,640 Speaker 1: you know, cameras cataloging every second of our lives. No, 901 00:47:53,120 --> 00:47:55,040 Speaker 1: So I think that part is a little bit different. 902 00:47:55,440 --> 00:47:57,480 Speaker 1: But the reality is, I think companies are looking for 903 00:47:57,560 --> 00:48:00,160 Speaker 1: more risks than just someone that's you know, may be 904 00:48:00,239 --> 00:48:04,120 Speaker 1: drinking or someone in a bathing suit. Um, even drugs. 905 00:48:04,160 --> 00:48:07,120 Speaker 1: I mean they were saying that even marijuana, if that 906 00:48:07,280 --> 00:48:09,279 Speaker 1: was in pictures, it wasn't that big of a deal 907 00:48:09,280 --> 00:48:11,040 Speaker 1: with the companies, which I can't believe I'm saying this, 908 00:48:11,160 --> 00:48:13,120 Speaker 1: but that is so frightening to me. I mean, I 909 00:48:13,200 --> 00:48:15,919 Speaker 1: have like two polaroids of me, like with Boone's Farm 910 00:48:16,040 --> 00:48:17,719 Speaker 1: from when I was younger, and I am so glad 911 00:48:17,719 --> 00:48:20,840 Speaker 1: they're polaroids and can't be fined I can't be found 912 00:48:20,840 --> 00:48:23,680 Speaker 1: on the internet. But oh my gosh, my life didn't 913 00:48:23,680 --> 00:48:26,960 Speaker 1: even start until you know, the late two thousands when 914 00:48:27,000 --> 00:48:29,239 Speaker 1: digital cameras came out, and I'm like, thank god, I 915 00:48:29,280 --> 00:48:33,879 Speaker 1: had all my craziness before that happened. The embarrassing haircuts. 916 00:48:33,920 --> 00:48:38,040 Speaker 1: I can't. Um. So, you know, in closing, what's next 917 00:48:38,120 --> 00:48:42,880 Speaker 1: for social media? Like, what's the next Instagram? Oh, what's 918 00:48:42,920 --> 00:48:45,799 Speaker 1: the next Instagram? I think, I mean, obviously TikTok we're 919 00:48:45,800 --> 00:48:51,480 Speaker 1: seeing a lot of billion I cannot. Well, it's so 920 00:48:51,520 --> 00:48:53,439 Speaker 1: weird too, because it's it's just it's one of these 921 00:48:53,480 --> 00:48:57,440 Speaker 1: things that like, it's not everyone even is aware of it. 922 00:48:57,560 --> 00:48:59,640 Speaker 1: Just yeah, I mean people have heard of it, but 923 00:49:00,040 --> 00:49:02,200 Speaker 1: are a lot of people that aren't on it yet, 924 00:49:02,239 --> 00:49:03,960 Speaker 1: which I think that's big. But at the same time, 925 00:49:03,960 --> 00:49:07,040 Speaker 1: I think at this point it appeals to the younger demographic, 926 00:49:07,120 --> 00:49:09,959 Speaker 1: which you know, limits its appeal for now because people 927 00:49:09,960 --> 00:49:12,080 Speaker 1: see this like the young kids thing to do, right, 928 00:49:12,160 --> 00:49:14,520 Speaker 1: So the adults aren't really on it. But if you remember, 929 00:49:14,600 --> 00:49:18,240 Speaker 1: that's the way Facebook was back in the day. So um, 930 00:49:18,280 --> 00:49:20,600 Speaker 1: I think the problem for all these platforms is that 931 00:49:21,040 --> 00:49:24,240 Speaker 1: nobody can build something that is that is what people 932 00:49:24,280 --> 00:49:27,520 Speaker 1: want because if you look at any of the platforms 933 00:49:27,560 --> 00:49:30,080 Speaker 1: for over the years, like Facebook and we have Twitter, 934 00:49:30,200 --> 00:49:32,160 Speaker 1: and we have Instagram, and we have all these things 935 00:49:32,160 --> 00:49:34,919 Speaker 1: that have come and gone, none of them were sort 936 00:49:34,960 --> 00:49:37,879 Speaker 1: of imagined to be used to the way they are. 937 00:49:38,239 --> 00:49:40,719 Speaker 1: So like everyone thought Facebook was the best, Everyone used it, 938 00:49:40,760 --> 00:49:41,960 Speaker 1: they used the heck out of it, and all of 939 00:49:42,000 --> 00:49:43,560 Speaker 1: a sudden, now it's like you just drop it and 940 00:49:43,600 --> 00:49:46,319 Speaker 1: it's like on the side of the road. So will 941 00:49:46,360 --> 00:49:50,319 Speaker 1: Instagram become that? I don't know, but I think Instagram 942 00:49:50,600 --> 00:49:53,280 Speaker 1: from what I've seen, has made some pretty smart moves 943 00:49:53,600 --> 00:49:56,160 Speaker 1: to keep it kind of like the hottest, coolest thing going. 944 00:49:56,520 --> 00:49:59,840 Speaker 1: And they stole stories right away from Snapchat, which you 945 00:50:00,400 --> 00:50:03,680 Speaker 1: really help them because everyone switched like pretty much overnight 946 00:50:04,280 --> 00:50:07,359 Speaker 1: two Instagram stories over Stepchat. So will there be something 947 00:50:07,400 --> 00:50:09,919 Speaker 1: that comes along the way. I don't know. It's tough 948 00:50:09,960 --> 00:50:12,840 Speaker 1: to tell. I'm I'm not sure TikTok is that platform, 949 00:50:12,880 --> 00:50:15,680 Speaker 1: But could there be something invented perhaps? Thank you so 950 00:50:15,760 --> 00:50:18,640 Speaker 1: much Rich for coming on you guys. You have to 951 00:50:18,680 --> 00:50:21,320 Speaker 1: read his book. It's called one oh one iPhone Tips 952 00:50:21,360 --> 00:50:33,080 Speaker 1: and Tricks. It's going to be good, all right. So 953 00:50:33,080 --> 00:50:35,440 Speaker 1: now we're going to get into some rapid fire questions 954 00:50:35,480 --> 00:50:38,759 Speaker 1: with Jamie and Dr gold Schert. Whoever thinks they have 955 00:50:39,160 --> 00:50:43,920 Speaker 1: the better I'm doing it in quotes answer should ring in. 956 00:50:44,520 --> 00:50:49,440 Speaker 1: And the first question is if you are somebody starting 957 00:50:49,440 --> 00:50:53,160 Speaker 1: out you want to become an influencer and you don't 958 00:50:53,160 --> 00:50:57,480 Speaker 1: know how, what are some quick tips? Uh, I would 959 00:50:57,480 --> 00:51:00,799 Speaker 1: say probably learn how to our to get a good 960 00:51:00,880 --> 00:51:03,759 Speaker 1: camera or a good iPhone I guess these days, and 961 00:51:03,800 --> 00:51:06,880 Speaker 1: to get an editing editing software, to like have good 962 00:51:06,920 --> 00:51:09,000 Speaker 1: photos because people want to follow you for good photos. 963 00:51:09,000 --> 00:51:10,440 Speaker 1: It's kind of and how often do they need to 964 00:51:10,480 --> 00:51:14,120 Speaker 1: be posting content? Oh? Regularly every day? That's my that's 965 00:51:14,160 --> 00:51:16,560 Speaker 1: my always been every single day I have posted a 966 00:51:16,560 --> 00:51:19,400 Speaker 1: photo unless I want to fight. Okay, do you guys 967 00:51:19,440 --> 00:51:25,480 Speaker 1: think social media is our friend of me? Definitely right? 968 00:51:25,600 --> 00:51:28,960 Speaker 1: I mean this whole podcast has kind of been encapsulating 969 00:51:29,000 --> 00:51:32,719 Speaker 1: this complicated relationship. We have a social media It's like 970 00:51:33,120 --> 00:51:35,600 Speaker 1: the best and the worst boyfriend ever, you know, like 971 00:51:35,640 --> 00:51:38,879 Speaker 1: it's the best time ever. It's so seductive and so 972 00:51:38,960 --> 00:51:41,279 Speaker 1: addictive in a lot of ways, and so much fun 973 00:51:41,480 --> 00:51:43,879 Speaker 1: and compelling, and you can learn a lot and then 974 00:51:43,880 --> 00:51:45,759 Speaker 1: on the other hand, like it can hurt you and 975 00:51:45,800 --> 00:51:49,120 Speaker 1: confuse you and you know, make you feel um, not 976 00:51:49,239 --> 00:51:51,319 Speaker 1: so great in your own skin at times. So I 977 00:51:51,320 --> 00:51:53,040 Speaker 1: think actually a friend of me is like it's like 978 00:51:53,080 --> 00:51:57,839 Speaker 1: the perfect word forward speaking of seduction cat fishing? Can 979 00:51:57,880 --> 00:52:00,520 Speaker 1: you actually trust people? You were talking too through d 980 00:52:00,719 --> 00:52:04,839 Speaker 1: M s m hm, I get. I mean, I don't 981 00:52:04,840 --> 00:52:08,440 Speaker 1: even know how to answer that, to be honest, that's 982 00:52:08,440 --> 00:52:10,120 Speaker 1: the point of the check mark, is to make it 983 00:52:10,160 --> 00:52:12,759 Speaker 1: the real person or not right. But not everybody has 984 00:52:12,800 --> 00:52:14,640 Speaker 1: a check mark. I mean a lot of people don't 985 00:52:14,680 --> 00:52:17,080 Speaker 1: have check marks. So I guess to do that at 986 00:52:17,120 --> 00:52:22,520 Speaker 1: your own risk. Um, should we be face tuning, wiscoing, 987 00:52:22,640 --> 00:52:27,040 Speaker 1: photoshopping and filtering? Are we altering reality too much? You know? 988 00:52:27,120 --> 00:52:28,879 Speaker 1: I mean I'm of two minds of this. I think 989 00:52:28,920 --> 00:52:31,680 Speaker 1: in part, as you were talking about, Jamie, that there's 990 00:52:31,680 --> 00:52:34,000 Speaker 1: an art to it, in a creativity and a fun 991 00:52:34,680 --> 00:52:37,279 Speaker 1: that I think people are drawn to, and I don't 992 00:52:37,280 --> 00:52:41,120 Speaker 1: think that should be totally impeded. But I think it's 993 00:52:41,160 --> 00:52:45,319 Speaker 1: so important for there to be so many more opportunities 994 00:52:45,360 --> 00:52:47,880 Speaker 1: for people to relate to people in their natural habitat, 995 00:52:47,960 --> 00:52:53,000 Speaker 1: whether we're talking environmental, like physical, mental, emotional, spiritual. There 996 00:52:53,120 --> 00:52:54,960 Speaker 1: there's just such a lack of that right now. And 997 00:52:54,960 --> 00:52:56,839 Speaker 1: we've been talking a lot during this podcast how when 998 00:52:56,880 --> 00:52:59,840 Speaker 1: it pops up on social media, even in your Instagram, 999 00:52:59,880 --> 00:53:02,239 Speaker 1: to that people are really drawn to it, really drawn 1000 00:53:02,280 --> 00:53:04,040 Speaker 1: to it. Well, you know what I just learned from 1001 00:53:04,040 --> 00:53:07,520 Speaker 1: one of our producers. We booked you, Jamie through d 1002 00:53:07,760 --> 00:53:10,759 Speaker 1: M s because you did. You slid right into that 1003 00:53:10,840 --> 00:53:13,440 Speaker 1: d M and I was like, yes, and we didn't 1004 00:53:13,440 --> 00:53:16,480 Speaker 1: catfish you. I thought it was for a minute and 1005 00:53:16,480 --> 00:53:18,239 Speaker 1: I was like, can I have Can you send me 1006 00:53:18,280 --> 00:53:20,759 Speaker 1: an email with details? And it was like yeah, And 1007 00:53:20,840 --> 00:53:22,560 Speaker 1: then the email didn't come for a few days and 1008 00:53:22,600 --> 00:53:24,680 Speaker 1: I was like, oh, it's totally not real, like someone 1009 00:53:24,760 --> 00:53:27,359 Speaker 1: was praying on my emotions that I wanted to do 1010 00:53:27,480 --> 00:53:30,720 Speaker 1: this so but it was real. That is so funny. 1011 00:53:30,760 --> 00:53:32,600 Speaker 1: I told you I read all those d M Yeah, 1012 00:53:32,640 --> 00:53:34,640 Speaker 1: she's not mess around. She is. You know what I 1013 00:53:34,719 --> 00:53:36,960 Speaker 1: don't If you need to talk to me right something 1014 00:53:36,960 --> 00:53:40,440 Speaker 1: in my comments or message me, I guess and our 1015 00:53:40,600 --> 00:53:45,760 Speaker 1: message Jamie and should reach out to me? Um, okay? 1016 00:53:45,840 --> 00:53:48,960 Speaker 1: How authentic are our lives via social media? I can 1017 00:53:49,000 --> 00:53:51,160 Speaker 1: answer for me and then maybe Jamie you answer as well. 1018 00:53:51,680 --> 00:53:54,640 Speaker 1: I think that I try to show as much as 1019 00:53:54,640 --> 00:53:58,279 Speaker 1: I possibly can. So I live a pretty authentic life 1020 00:53:58,320 --> 00:54:00,160 Speaker 1: when you're when you're seeing my kids, my life, if 1021 00:54:00,160 --> 00:54:04,960 Speaker 1: the chaos working out my clients, that's all that being said, 1022 00:54:06,000 --> 00:54:08,360 Speaker 1: my indst to stories. If my skin is looking super 1023 00:54:08,400 --> 00:54:11,640 Speaker 1: clear one day, it is the subtle filter, guys. It's 1024 00:54:11,640 --> 00:54:14,040 Speaker 1: the one that's purple and it has little dogs around 1025 00:54:14,320 --> 00:54:17,319 Speaker 1: like it's little sparkles. That is the filter I have, 1026 00:54:17,520 --> 00:54:20,120 Speaker 1: Like Rosa sha, my skin is red as these ladies, 1027 00:54:20,120 --> 00:54:23,480 Speaker 1: they can see it right now. Not even what about you, guys? Um. 1028 00:54:23,520 --> 00:54:25,839 Speaker 1: I mean, I feel like I'm pretty authentic these days. 1029 00:54:25,840 --> 00:54:28,160 Speaker 1: I used to be really against like showing all the 1030 00:54:28,440 --> 00:54:30,880 Speaker 1: you know, bad days and stuff like that, and I 1031 00:54:30,880 --> 00:54:32,839 Speaker 1: feel like now that I have been showing it more, 1032 00:54:32,880 --> 00:54:35,759 Speaker 1: I've actually gotten more support from people because they just 1033 00:54:35,800 --> 00:54:38,640 Speaker 1: see that you're a normal person dealing with normal things 1034 00:54:38,640 --> 00:54:42,000 Speaker 1: that happen in life. And you know, I get depressed 1035 00:54:42,000 --> 00:54:43,960 Speaker 1: some days, I get I have really great days. So 1036 00:54:44,000 --> 00:54:46,359 Speaker 1: I feel like followers are resonating more with you being 1037 00:54:46,360 --> 00:54:48,399 Speaker 1: more authentic and stuff like, which leads me I need 1038 00:54:48,400 --> 00:54:51,680 Speaker 1: to ask you this now. Do you think that because 1039 00:54:51,680 --> 00:54:53,920 Speaker 1: you spend so much time on social media, you're talking 1040 00:54:53,960 --> 00:54:56,839 Speaker 1: to friends like real life friends and some of my 1041 00:54:56,880 --> 00:54:59,480 Speaker 1: best friends now are people that I met through Instagram 1042 00:54:59,520 --> 00:55:02,080 Speaker 1: just from Hey, what's up? Hey, Like, I'm even meeting 1043 00:55:02,120 --> 00:55:04,399 Speaker 1: up with the follower tomorrow to just hang out because 1044 00:55:04,400 --> 00:55:06,520 Speaker 1: we both love Star Wars, so we're gonna watch Star Wars. 1045 00:55:06,560 --> 00:55:08,560 Speaker 1: Like but don't you ever get sketched out by that 1046 00:55:08,680 --> 00:55:10,360 Speaker 1: a little bit? But I feel like I've talked to 1047 00:55:10,400 --> 00:55:13,040 Speaker 1: them for years now and it's like not weird. So 1048 00:55:13,680 --> 00:55:15,760 Speaker 1: if you guys, haven't you need to watch the movie 1049 00:55:15,800 --> 00:55:18,719 Speaker 1: The American Meme. Have you all watched that? Oh? It 1050 00:55:18,880 --> 00:55:21,600 Speaker 1: is so good. It's about the life of an influencer. 1051 00:55:21,640 --> 00:55:25,160 Speaker 1: So make sure you guys tune into that watching that today. Um, 1052 00:55:25,200 --> 00:55:27,960 Speaker 1: what is something you've done slash experienced in the past 1053 00:55:28,000 --> 00:55:31,160 Speaker 1: that you're thankful social media wasn't a thing for growing up? 1054 00:55:34,640 --> 00:55:37,920 Speaker 1: Probably my partying days. I'm really glad that, like Instagram 1055 00:55:38,000 --> 00:55:40,200 Speaker 1: wasn't a thing when I was like in college and 1056 00:55:40,480 --> 00:55:43,640 Speaker 1: you know, drinking and doing what college people do. I'm 1057 00:55:43,640 --> 00:55:46,359 Speaker 1: really glad the Instagram kind of came out right when 1058 00:55:46,360 --> 00:55:48,840 Speaker 1: I was like starting in the workforce and really getting 1059 00:55:48,840 --> 00:55:51,040 Speaker 1: into like fashion and blogging, and I'm glad it kind 1060 00:55:51,040 --> 00:55:53,880 Speaker 1: of That's how I feel too, I mean, I wouldn't 1061 00:55:53,960 --> 00:55:57,799 Speaker 1: want my youth out there. And since I had a 1062 00:55:57,880 --> 00:56:01,239 Speaker 1: lot of bad self tanner moments at hair, eyebrows, my 1063 00:56:01,280 --> 00:56:07,400 Speaker 1: eyebrows so thin, there's not a lot of photos of that. Okay. 1064 00:56:07,440 --> 00:56:10,200 Speaker 1: I think about my young self, like thirteen fourteen, trying 1065 00:56:10,239 --> 00:56:13,480 Speaker 1: to navigate the world of social media, if you're allowed 1066 00:56:13,520 --> 00:56:16,439 Speaker 1: to to be on that landscape that young, and how 1067 00:56:16,480 --> 00:56:19,520 Speaker 1: difficult that would I could barely navigate my aid plant pager, 1068 00:56:21,000 --> 00:56:24,239 Speaker 1: you know, navigating the poll of of putting yourself out there, 1069 00:56:24,280 --> 00:56:26,799 Speaker 1: the insecurity, the desire to be popular, they need to 1070 00:56:26,800 --> 00:56:28,600 Speaker 1: be liked, like all of that. It was hard enough 1071 00:56:28,600 --> 00:56:31,960 Speaker 1: in high school without Instagram to like judge you when 1072 00:56:32,000 --> 00:56:34,719 Speaker 1: you get home, like everyone's judging you, like all night 1073 00:56:34,800 --> 00:56:36,960 Speaker 1: and probably not liking your photos, and then it'll stress 1074 00:56:36,960 --> 00:56:39,320 Speaker 1: you out the next day, like, oh, so was I 1075 00:56:39,400 --> 00:56:41,480 Speaker 1: didn't like my photo? Now at school it's like weird 1076 00:56:41,560 --> 00:56:43,920 Speaker 1: and sokward, Like I can't even imagine all that was 1077 00:56:43,960 --> 00:56:46,160 Speaker 1: hard enough without all of it. And what are your 1078 00:56:46,200 --> 00:56:49,360 Speaker 1: true thoughts on people who choose to not have any 1079 00:56:49,640 --> 00:56:54,640 Speaker 1: social media? What are you hiding? That's actually we had 1080 00:56:54,640 --> 00:56:58,600 Speaker 1: a Cheater podcast and um they said something about like 1081 00:56:58,640 --> 00:57:01,759 Speaker 1: people that have no social media whatever. I'll say this. 1082 00:57:02,040 --> 00:57:05,200 Speaker 1: I dated someone in college and he had no Facebook, 1083 00:57:05,320 --> 00:57:08,239 Speaker 1: no Instagram, none of that, and he was cheating on me. 1084 00:57:08,320 --> 00:57:10,759 Speaker 1: So I don't I don't trust anyone these days if 1085 00:57:10,800 --> 00:57:12,760 Speaker 1: you're not interested in what's going on in the world 1086 00:57:12,760 --> 00:57:15,560 Speaker 1: with Instagram, because you can follow whatever you want really 1087 00:57:15,600 --> 00:57:18,680 Speaker 1: to like see to gear what you see. So something 1088 00:57:18,720 --> 00:57:22,800 Speaker 1: something's weird and speaking of your cheating X, should we 1089 00:57:23,400 --> 00:57:27,200 Speaker 1: unfollow our ex? Yes, I think I'm not interested. I 1090 00:57:27,240 --> 00:57:28,880 Speaker 1: don't want to see it. I don't think it's helpful. 1091 00:57:29,160 --> 00:57:31,960 Speaker 1: But then people, you know, what, what is our need 1092 00:57:32,040 --> 00:57:34,680 Speaker 1: to fill sometimes to go look? I mean, I think 1093 00:57:34,720 --> 00:57:38,240 Speaker 1: it's quite human for people. It's like that that pain 1094 00:57:38,400 --> 00:57:41,200 Speaker 1: pleasure thing of like wanting to kind of release the 1095 00:57:41,280 --> 00:57:44,360 Speaker 1: tension by knowing it also kind of helps you move on. 1096 00:57:44,400 --> 00:57:47,120 Speaker 1: I guess if you see that maybe they're dating something, 1097 00:57:47,120 --> 00:57:49,320 Speaker 1: they're living their best life of that. But then you 1098 00:57:49,360 --> 00:57:51,439 Speaker 1: know that you're living your best life on there too, 1099 00:57:51,440 --> 00:57:53,880 Speaker 1: so maybe it they see. I don't know. Um, Okay, 1100 00:57:53,880 --> 00:57:56,439 Speaker 1: do you guys think that sending threats on social media 1101 00:57:56,480 --> 00:58:00,680 Speaker 1: should be a felony? I guess there's like a gray 1102 00:58:00,720 --> 00:58:03,240 Speaker 1: area of what's like what would be what's a threat? 1103 00:58:03,680 --> 00:58:06,320 Speaker 1: How bad a threat? Has someone threatening my cats saying 1104 00:58:06,360 --> 00:58:11,000 Speaker 1: that they're fat? You's threat of physical violence? It has 1105 00:58:11,040 --> 00:58:15,280 Speaker 1: to be taken. Yeah, I mean, at least now I've 1106 00:58:15,320 --> 00:58:22,520 Speaker 1: I've learned that you can uh block certain words which 1107 00:58:22,520 --> 00:58:24,920 Speaker 1: I didn't know, so that's something can restrict people now. 1108 00:58:24,960 --> 00:58:26,880 Speaker 1: And you can restrict people. So if you're trying to, 1109 00:58:26,920 --> 00:58:29,520 Speaker 1: you know, help your kids, you can restrict certain words 1110 00:58:29,520 --> 00:58:31,919 Speaker 1: if they're being bullied, so you can protect them that way, 1111 00:58:31,920 --> 00:58:34,640 Speaker 1: but also be stalking their Instagram accounts. Don't just let 1112 00:58:34,720 --> 00:58:37,120 Speaker 1: them do it on their own. If they only want Instagram, 1113 00:58:37,200 --> 00:58:39,160 Speaker 1: if they're the only ones on it, don't let them 1114 00:58:39,160 --> 00:58:45,120 Speaker 1: have it. Um and question, because you said your husband 1115 00:58:45,200 --> 00:58:48,040 Speaker 1: is now an influencer as well, do you think social 1116 00:58:48,040 --> 00:58:52,640 Speaker 1: media causes more stress that slash jealousy and relationships? I mean, 1117 00:58:52,680 --> 00:58:55,400 Speaker 1: to be completely honest, Like we have each other's passwords, 1118 00:58:55,440 --> 00:58:57,520 Speaker 1: were logged in on both each other's phones because he 1119 00:58:57,640 --> 00:58:59,480 Speaker 1: like manages me, so he needs to be on my 1120 00:58:59,520 --> 00:59:02,200 Speaker 1: profile a lot to do stuff. So like it actually 1121 00:59:02,240 --> 00:59:05,280 Speaker 1: makes it easier because like we don't like we don't 1122 00:59:05,320 --> 00:59:08,400 Speaker 1: hide anything, Like we're very open about like everything. So 1123 00:59:08,720 --> 00:59:10,919 Speaker 1: it used to be a stressful thing until he really 1124 00:59:10,920 --> 00:59:13,480 Speaker 1: got into the world, and then now he understands and 1125 00:59:13,520 --> 00:59:16,320 Speaker 1: it's like less of a stress now instead of having 1126 00:59:16,360 --> 00:59:19,520 Speaker 1: to explain things going on with Instagram or like brands 1127 00:59:19,640 --> 00:59:22,360 Speaker 1: or whatever, he like gets it now. So it goes 1128 00:59:22,440 --> 00:59:25,440 Speaker 1: back to my original thing, which because I have this 1129 00:59:25,480 --> 00:59:28,400 Speaker 1: app called like three sixty app, which tells like everything 1130 00:59:28,440 --> 00:59:32,080 Speaker 1: about like how fast somebody's driving, if they're texting and driving, 1131 00:59:32,080 --> 00:59:34,160 Speaker 1: blah blah blah. And somebody was like, I can't believe 1132 00:59:34,160 --> 00:59:36,040 Speaker 1: you you have that on your phone. I'm like, of 1133 00:59:36,080 --> 00:59:39,040 Speaker 1: course I have that on my phone. Like so it's 1134 00:59:39,120 --> 00:59:41,959 Speaker 1: kind of if you're okay being an open book, there's 1135 00:59:42,040 --> 00:59:45,919 Speaker 1: less reason for stress and jealousy and anxiety because then 1136 00:59:46,160 --> 00:59:48,000 Speaker 1: you have less to worry about it. But if you 1137 00:59:48,000 --> 00:59:52,400 Speaker 1: have somebody who's covering their hand over their Instagram or 1138 00:59:52,720 --> 00:59:55,240 Speaker 1: d m NG or whatever it is, or they all 1139 00:59:55,240 --> 00:59:57,200 Speaker 1: of a sudden have a Snapchat, but you're not their 1140 00:59:57,240 --> 01:00:01,240 Speaker 1: snapchat friend, we don't even have Snapchat in our relationship 1141 01:00:01,280 --> 01:00:03,880 Speaker 1: because it was like at the very beginning, it was like, 1142 01:00:03,920 --> 01:00:05,400 Speaker 1: what who are you sending? And I was like, I'm 1143 01:00:05,440 --> 01:00:07,280 Speaker 1: deleting it. I don't even want all this drama like 1144 01:00:07,680 --> 01:00:10,760 Speaker 1: I don't have time for it, while you guys today 1145 01:00:10,840 --> 01:00:13,760 Speaker 1: was so much fun. I love learning the ins and out, 1146 01:00:14,560 --> 01:00:17,400 Speaker 1: ins and out of the Graham. And thank you guys 1147 01:00:17,480 --> 01:00:20,720 Speaker 1: so much for joining me. Thanks thanks joining us, Thanks 1148 01:00:20,720 --> 01:00:24,040 Speaker 1: for listening. Subscribe to cd T POT on her radio 1149 01:00:24,400 --> 01:00:26,200 Speaker 1: or wherever you listen to podcasts.