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Speaker 1: Motherfucking mini year. So mini episode, motherfucking mini year. So

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Speaker 1: bang bang bang, skeet, skeet skeet, firework, firework, shooting guns

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Speaker 1: in the air. Welcome, ladies and gentlemen to another phenomenal

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Speaker 1: episode of My Mama Told Me, the podcast where we

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Speaker 1: dive deep into the pockets of black conspiracies and we

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Speaker 1: finally worked to prove the theories that you the listener

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Speaker 1: have at home. It's a motherfucking mini episode, the first

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Speaker 1: one of the new year. Hell yeah, that audience goes

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Speaker 1: for a long time. No, they won't stop clapping. This

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Speaker 1: might be an encore. I don't know. Oh no, that

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Speaker 1: that lasted far longer than I was comfortable with like

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Speaker 1: that in real life. No, it doesn't. I've never I've

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Speaker 1: literally never walked out on the stage and and felt like, hey,

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Speaker 1: you guys can stop now. It's always been like no,

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Speaker 1: that was the exact appropriate amount of class. Yeah, that

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Speaker 1: was That was a good response for a guy in shorts.

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Speaker 1: Yeah are you in shorts on stage? Guy? Now? If

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Speaker 1: you broken that seal? I So I used to do

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Speaker 1: it heavy because I was very young and like, no,

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Speaker 1: I can do whatever I want the genre. Now I'm

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Speaker 1: like older, and I'm like, man, they paid money, they

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Speaker 1: got parking, put some fucking pants on. Yeah yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: Like you loser, what's wrong with you? I remember being

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Speaker 1: like twenty four five in Boston and going to a

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Speaker 1: comedy club in shorts that I was performing on Killing

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Speaker 1: that night, and then the owner still pulling me aside

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Speaker 1: and being like, hey, we don't do that. You don't.

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Speaker 1: You don't wearing shorts in the In my mind, I

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Speaker 1: was like, man, fuck you, Like I where would I want?

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Speaker 1: But also I was like, noted, I actually didn't know

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Speaker 1: that that was a rule. And I've literally never done

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Speaker 1: it since. Really, people told me a lot when I

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Speaker 1: first started, because I started in California it's so hot,

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Speaker 1: I was wearing shorts, and because I'm coming off the

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Speaker 1: bus or the train or whatever, I'm wearing shorts. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: We're like, you can't do that. And I was very

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Speaker 1: like adamant to like make my own rules. So I

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Speaker 1: had years where I did it, but now no, I don't.

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Speaker 1: It's not it's like if you would, it's not. It's

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Speaker 1: not very appropriate. No, it's not great. I will say

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Speaker 1: that there are I have seen a fair amount of

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Speaker 1: there's like obviously, this new generation of comedians who are sexy.

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Speaker 1: I've of it. I'm so sick of it. Go get

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Speaker 1: a real job. You're hot, you're supposed to be in sales.

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Speaker 1: You're coming over here doing this. I'm gonna around and

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Speaker 1: pop up in a jeeku. Then how about that they're

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Speaker 1: all these like for those activated box dickets. For those

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Speaker 1: of you that are unfamiliar, what's what's raging David out

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Speaker 1: is there's there's a wave of very attractive people, which

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Speaker 1: is fine, sucks an attractive person, but then they lean

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Speaker 1: into their attractiveness on stage. They make themselves like, they

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Speaker 1: wear sexy clothes and they do the worst thing that

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Speaker 1: ever happened to comedy. This ship was more if you

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Speaker 1: were hot and you did this, it's because something bad

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Speaker 1: happen to you. And boy oh boy, is that true.

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Speaker 1: That's the only people even came over here. Came over here.

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Speaker 1: Now you excit because hot. It's like the least like

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Speaker 1: you get it everywhere else in the world. Don't come

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Speaker 1: over here where I'm at. It's also it's not funny

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Speaker 1: like hot funny. It's so weird. It's so serious. Being

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Speaker 1: sexy is so serious. It's never funny. It's never funny.

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Speaker 1: You ever meet hot girls who are like, but I'm

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Speaker 1: all so funny, and then you talk to them and

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Speaker 1: they just like pull their eyes. You're like, whoa, this

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Speaker 1: isn't even nobody told you that's not set tired, hot lady,

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Speaker 1: you gotta take those chap sticks out of your mouths

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Speaker 1: PP and your coke dog. I don't think that's cool anymore.

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Speaker 1: And no man singing that Siamese song from the Aristic

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Speaker 1: Cats like they don't know what funny is. And boy,

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Speaker 1: is that a tough revisit. I uh been showing my

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Speaker 1: daughter some classic movies and turns out that's not a

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Speaker 1: classic anymore. That's goes. That's just really hurtful to some communities.

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Speaker 1: I care about that said. I I say all this

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Speaker 1: to say that that I feel like the new sexy

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Speaker 1: comedians have introduced a wave of wearing shorts on stage

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Speaker 1: that rules no longer apply to them. They're sort of

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Speaker 1: like good legs. How many unf sexy legs had good

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Speaker 1: Let you know what, Ronnie danger Fields legs look like.

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Speaker 1: I don't. And I'm terrificking back for Bruce Beaches. She

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Speaker 1: was disgusting. You were seen Robin Harris's legs. No, no,

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Speaker 1: you don't want to see Robin Harrison's legs. That's two

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Speaker 1: bad ones. That's what I know. I imagine Robbin Harris's

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Speaker 1: legs look like the beef jerky they throw out where

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Speaker 1: they're like, we can't sell this to people. This ain't good.

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Speaker 1: There's three colors, and we funked up this batch. But

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Speaker 1: this batch, this is cool. We put that in the

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Speaker 1: bag like old jerk chicken. We miss you. Robin Harris,

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Speaker 1: come back. Hey, doors wide open if you want to

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Speaker 1: come back. Baby's kids too, Man, we need it, We

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Speaker 1: need it. Did you know, and I I'm sorry that

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Speaker 1: we're not even going to begin this episode reasonably in anyway?

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Speaker 1: Did you know that it wasn't Yeah, it wasn't even

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Speaker 1: Robin Harris and Baba's kids because he had already passed. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's fucking crazy highlight his career. Really, To be honest,

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Speaker 1: I I think that's fair to say Phase On has

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Speaker 1: has had some challenges since it's complicated. Remember when he

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Speaker 1: guerrilla that guy in the airport the video. Probably he's

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Speaker 1: beat up a lot of people. Yeah, he's big, he's

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Speaker 1: a big dude, and and he doesn't get along with

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Speaker 1: a lot of people, and he doesn't seem to know I.

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Speaker 1: He's the first famous comedian I everag saw in real life.

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Speaker 1: He's at the brainwashing San Francisco. Whoa bad stand up? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I don't want this. I don't want this to get

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Speaker 1: out because he'll beat the ship out of me. That's

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Speaker 1: the last thing I need. Three for Phase on Love

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Speaker 1: to beat my nold on me and you together we

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Speaker 1: can beat up Phase on Love. Bro. I have no

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Speaker 1: doubt light skin when it comes down to it, and

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Speaker 1: that's what I'm worried about. Numb some crazy jit I

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Speaker 1: do have numb chucks exactly, chucking 're sitting right there.

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Speaker 1: I got numb chunks just in case, just in case

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Speaker 1: the mother run up Kate. Everybody knows that here's what's

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Speaker 1: gonna be happening. You're gonna take off your shirt, You're

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Speaker 1: gonna oil up, You're gonna warm up your numb junks.

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Speaker 1: In the meantime, he's gonna put my head through a

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Speaker 1: fucking bike rack. That was see the oiling the shirt,

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Speaker 1: The oiling my chest is the hurtful partner of where

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Speaker 1: this went. I was perfectly fine with you saying that

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Speaker 1: I would try karate. I would, but the fact that

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Speaker 1: you think that I wouldn't, that's where you're conflating me

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Speaker 1: with a sexy comedian. And I don't care that I don't.

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Speaker 1: I don't care for that one Big Trey songs. And

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Speaker 1: that's right. He's not a good man either. But we

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Speaker 1: don't need to keep talking about these bad men. No, no, no,

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Speaker 1: or whether or not we could beat up. I mean,

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Speaker 1: when you're karate in my mouth, maybe we could like

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Speaker 1: get away. I think if nothing else we could, Uh,

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Speaker 1: we could throw some dust in his eyes and kate

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Speaker 1: and I mean because he put hands on that guy

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Speaker 1: at the airport. Yeah no, he's he's fucked some people up.

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Speaker 1: And that's I haven't been in a fighting ten years. Man.

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Speaker 1: Good for you for having an adult fight. I haven't

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Speaker 1: even had an adult fight. It's overrated. Yeah, no, it

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Speaker 1: doesn't seem good. It seems like whatever hurt hurts for

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Speaker 1: a while. Yeah, like, have you fallen down as a man,

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Speaker 1: like it sucks? Yeah, it's bad. No, it's not good anyway.

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Speaker 1: We glad, glad you glad you do have those dump

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Speaker 1: chucks though, Yeah, no, just in case, Uh, I gotta

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Speaker 1: keep my family Safe. We have an email. We have

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Speaker 1: an email from a person named Corey. Corey sent us

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Speaker 1: an email over the holiday break that that you pointed out,

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Speaker 1: and the the subject line was exciting enough that it

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Speaker 1: felt like this is the appropriate way for us to

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Speaker 1: come back. But the subject line said, what them Dutch

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Speaker 1: niggas really up to? Was was what Corey sent us. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and you have said that multiple times on the podcast.

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Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know what I feel about that.

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Speaker 1: I don't like it. But Corey said, Hello, lengths in

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Speaker 1: the David, I love the formality, Hello lengths in the day.

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Speaker 1: I love a subject line that says what them Dutch

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Speaker 1: nigga is really up to and then the person being like,

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Speaker 1: greetings and salutations presents. I knew this wasn't a business email,

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Speaker 1: so he said, So, I I know I sent you,

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Speaker 1: guys more than a fair share of bullshit. Some you

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Speaker 1: address and some you seem to ignore. Okay, Corey, but

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Speaker 1: I don't think, Yeah, you're you're a little spicy. We

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Speaker 1: don't care. Yeah, fuck you, Corey. Pieces Well, stop reading

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Speaker 1: your email right this second. I can't read. But Corey said,

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Speaker 1: but I think this one might deserve some immediate attention.

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Speaker 1: He said, So, I was listening to the episode about

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Speaker 1: Black Santa, and you mentioned something about Dutch people in slavery,

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Speaker 1: and it reminded me of two things. The first was

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Speaker 1: about Dutch Masters cigars. When I was younger, a lot

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Speaker 1: of my friends enjoyed to find Dutch Masters with a

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Speaker 1: little weed substituted for the tobacco. I've never formalities. I

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Speaker 1: know what blunts are. Yeah, he's he's really explaining, Uh Masters,

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Speaker 1: you know, the urban youth like to replace the tobacco

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Speaker 1: with weed. Hey, are you a cop? You got to

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Speaker 1: say it if you motherfucking police? Last name, first name, Corey,

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Speaker 1: last name the police. He's got an under armored shirt

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Speaker 1: on right now, and it doesn't look good. They never

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Speaker 1: looked good in their under armour. But there, you idiot,

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Speaker 1: so he says. He said, I've never smoked weed copshit

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Speaker 1: in my life, So I'm not sure why they preferred

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Speaker 1: Dutchess over other brands. But I don't even know if

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Speaker 1: they were your friends? Were they your friends? Were those

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Speaker 1: are the guys you turned your hat around for? And

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Speaker 1: uh said, what's up? Fam? He goes on to say,

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Speaker 1: but there was one guy that would always tell everyone

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Speaker 1: that they should buy phillies or white owls, because Dutch

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Speaker 1: Masters were started by a group of slave owners that

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Speaker 1: had slaves working on tobacco fields. The second was about

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Speaker 1: Dutch Boy Paint and them not wanting to start to

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Speaker 1: stop making lead paint even though they knew it was harmful.

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Speaker 1: I swear I saw this somewhere. I also could have

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Speaker 1: imagined this ship, but I believe it was either something

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Speaker 1: I read or documentary I was watching where Dutch Boy

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Speaker 1: Paint said there was no need to stop using leading

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Speaker 1: paints because it was only black kids that were getting poisoned.

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Speaker 1: And they also made a flavored paint so that kids

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Speaker 1: could lick the walls. Jesus Christ, Cory, you are high

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Speaker 1: the funk are you talking about? He's that. I don't

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Speaker 1: know what's fact or fiction in any of that, but

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Speaker 1: I don't know if there's anyone that can take take

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Speaker 1: down these Dutch motherfucker's, it's you two, Thanks, Corey. So

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Speaker 1: you're not you're not buying the the are we talking about?

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Speaker 1: I think this is a scholarly podcast. We have to

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Speaker 1: entertain this nonsense. Oh wait, is this a scholarly podcast?

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Speaker 1: Because I'm talking it's the most scholarly thing I do

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Speaker 1: in a given weekend. That's fair that I'm going mini

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Speaker 1: golfing after this, Like, what are you talking? Yeah, you're

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Speaker 1: you're a silly billy throwing throoms of the fact that

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Speaker 1: I occasionally google some stuff means uh, I mean, I

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Speaker 1: guess I read books. But whoa, oh, whoa, we're getting

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Speaker 1: we're getting some hot intel here. Olivia just sent a

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Speaker 1: message saying that that there is it seems to be

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Speaker 1: some possibility that that there was in fact an effort

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Speaker 1: towards edible paint. What that is that what you're saying,

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Speaker 1: Olivia is is oh ship, look it is it? Wow?

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Speaker 1: We all Corey an apology. I'm sorry, Cory, Damn Corey.

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Speaker 1: It we called you an idiot. We we said you

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Speaker 1: weren't of of of scholarly. Turns out you're the brightest

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Speaker 1: man we've ever met. Core It turns out, man, core

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Speaker 1: you gotta take that detective's test. You're a cop, but

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Speaker 1: but you're better than the average beat cop. You gott

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Speaker 1: you don't need to be walking in checking Bodega's for

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Speaker 1: fucking if they're selling fantily for whatever they do. No, man,

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Speaker 1: you gotta you gotta really think about the FBI, Corey,

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Speaker 1: because you should be No, there's petty crime bullshit. So

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Speaker 1: specifically the Dutch Boy paint, it sounds like, yes, there

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Speaker 1: was an ad and and I assume an associated product

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Speaker 1: where they were making edible paint or at least paint

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Speaker 1: that was lickable for kids. And the flavors included pistachio,

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Speaker 1: which is the one that is shown and it is

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Speaker 1: pistachio colored technic. But why is Yeah, I'm not sure

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Speaker 1: why pistachio for children would be nobody. No kid is

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Speaker 1: ordering pistachio ice cream. And if they are, well, their

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Speaker 1: soul is trapped, an older soul trapped inside a young body.

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Speaker 1: You know, it looks like that Dutch boy stole your soul.

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Speaker 1: Look at that Dutch boy. That boy, No, that's a

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Speaker 1: sin for sure. That's that looks like a ventriloquist dummy

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Speaker 1: brought to life in a way that uh that God

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Speaker 1: didn't want it all. Oh, it's bad they can't show

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Speaker 1: the other half of his face, because that's how he

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Speaker 1: gets your soul. Well, I assume the other half has

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Speaker 1: been blown off by the person that didn't want him

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Speaker 1: to keep existing. You know, what I mean, assume they

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Speaker 1: don't show the other half because somebody got a shotgun.

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Speaker 1: It was like we gotta kill the boy and then

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Speaker 1: the Frenchman blues. Jesus, you know the Dutcher. I don't

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Speaker 1: like them. I'm saying it. I think we're proving it. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: so so. Additional flavors include cotton, candy, lemon, and marshmallow

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Speaker 1: for lick me, I want to let me flavored paint,

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Speaker 1: you Dutch psychopath. They didn't go with no good flavors.

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Speaker 1: You didn't have a red. Come on, dog, give me

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Speaker 1: a purple? Which one of these can be purple or

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Speaker 1: a blue? Why is there no blue? No blue raspberry?

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Speaker 1: You don't have blue raspberries and Dutch. Also, if we're

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Speaker 1: doing the Netherlands, you do lemon line, you do make

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Speaker 1: it a sprite. You always make it a spright. That's

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Speaker 1: what I was. That's how I was race. That's that's

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Speaker 1: if you get lemon, you also get a line. You

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Speaker 1: make it as this guy's inside this. You know why

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Speaker 1: I didn't believe this because once again the Dutch can

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Speaker 1: can they continue to surprise me? What they're insane behavior? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: they're there, insidious in a in a silly way, and

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Speaker 1: that I think makes it harder to predict. It's almost

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Speaker 1: like you're like you're you're playing guessing games with like

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Speaker 1: the fucking saw doll, you know what I mean, Like

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Speaker 1: it's scary. It's like because you know how like the

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Speaker 1: really scary villains are the ones who are also funny,

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Speaker 1: like the Dutch, the Dutchess, the Joker. The Joker was

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Speaker 1: probably Dutch. I wouldn't be surprised. He seems like some

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Speaker 1: Dutch to do. If we track that lineage, he's got

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Speaker 1: some Dutch. Sure, if we get Henry Lewis Gates on

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Speaker 1: the the case, he's gonna be sitting across from the jokers.

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Speaker 1: Like it turns out your you're you were born of

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Speaker 1: two pairs of clogs. That's I don't know anything else

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Speaker 1: about their culture. Windmills, a lot of water channels. The

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Speaker 1: famous Dutch footballer I didn't even know who the funk

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Speaker 1: that is? Alright, hell yeah, go crazy? Color orange they

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Speaker 1: did the colored oranges. No, but they're a football team.

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Speaker 1: Is is orange? Right? Mm hmm. I truly I knew

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Speaker 1: about the clocks and uh because I remember when the

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Speaker 1: World Cup was in South Africa a bunch of crazy

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Speaker 1: Dutch people drove from Dutch wherever the funk they are

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Speaker 1: they Germany? Oh yeah, Holland, I believe yeah, which nobody

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Speaker 1: can tell me why they're named the Dutch. The whole

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Speaker 1: thing is bulls. No, I think it's if I were

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Speaker 1: to guess it's real, it's yeah. I think it's uh

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Speaker 1: some trickery that they did, because you know, they again,

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Speaker 1: we're trading slaves and then and then got caught and

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Speaker 1: everybody was like, hey, you're responsible for this, and they

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Speaker 1: were like who else? We got a different name? Were yeah,

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Speaker 1: over here, we're in a new business. Now let pain nobody.

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Speaker 1: You know, to lick this wall cotton candy ann I

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Speaker 1: love it. Oh boy, Now I am curious to know

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Speaker 1: your stance on the on the uh the blunts of it?

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Speaker 1: Are you? Are you a Dutch masters man or your white?

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Speaker 1: Too much work for me with the Dutch Masters they

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Speaker 1: got two papers in them. This annoying. And I'm from

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Speaker 1: the West Man. I smoke swishers. I don't really smoke

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Speaker 1: blunts anymore, but when I was a young blunt enthusiast,

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Speaker 1: I was, Yeah, I smoke swishers mostly. Yeah, I think

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Speaker 1: it's the West Coast versus East Coast, because I've noticed

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Speaker 1: people in the East Coast really switchers like that. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I was about saying Swishers. I feel like in Chicago

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Speaker 1: where the move as well. I I think I think

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Speaker 1: maybe white owls were we're so a thing. But but

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Speaker 1: Dutch masters, I don't think I knew anybody that were like,

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Speaker 1: uh fucking with those super heavy No. I only ever

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Speaker 1: even heard about it from like the only times I

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Speaker 1: ever even tried to smoke a Dutch was because of like,

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00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:15,359
Speaker 1: you know, you hear like rappers talk about it, but

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Speaker 1: it's got, It's got like when you split it, it's

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Speaker 1: got like the two papers, like an interior and that,

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Speaker 1: so it's really it's really hard to roll. So yeah,

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Speaker 1: I've always been a Swisher sweets guy. From way back.

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Speaker 1: There was that there was that rumor going around for

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Speaker 1: a long time that the grapes onanes gave you cancer.

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Speaker 1: But you know, we got through. We got through, said

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Speaker 1: a thirty five year old man. I'm not. I don't

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Speaker 1: smoke once anymore though, really like them call him every

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Speaker 1: now and again. I spoke to Weed yesterday and I

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Speaker 1: was like, I hadn't I hadn't spoke a weed by

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Speaker 1: myself in a long time, and I was like, I

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Speaker 1: think this is not for me anymore. Yeah, I I've uh.

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Speaker 1: I didn't really start smoking weed until pretty well into

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Speaker 1: my adulthood, and so I was no longer like interested

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Speaker 1: in fucking around, and I just jumped to technology, you

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00:21:10,920 --> 00:21:14,800
Speaker 1: know what I mean, like like the vaping ship and

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00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:19,200
Speaker 1: like what it pre rolls and whatever was just easily accessible.

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Speaker 1: So I don't know much about like the differences between

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Speaker 1: like fucking blunts and and oh you never so you

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00:21:26,400 --> 00:21:29,600
Speaker 1: were you never got weed when there was bad weed? No,

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Speaker 1: not really. I mean I got it. I got it,

327
00:21:32,840 --> 00:21:34,600
Speaker 1: but I wasn't smoking it, you know what I mean.

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00:21:34,680 --> 00:21:37,920
Speaker 1: Like I was just amongst a group of people accessing it,

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00:21:38,040 --> 00:21:39,880
Speaker 1: and people be like this is his ass, and I'd

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Speaker 1: be like, alright, fellas, I don't know, we get a

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00:21:43,520 --> 00:21:46,680
Speaker 1: lot of work to get it, so maybe just appreciate it. Maybe. No,

332
00:21:47,040 --> 00:21:51,119
Speaker 1: the man I I started smoking, I unfortunately started smoking

333
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Speaker 1: weed when my brain was still development, which I wondered

334
00:21:53,880 --> 00:21:58,280
Speaker 1: sometimes there's like colors I can't see or something like

335
00:21:58,440 --> 00:22:00,639
Speaker 1: not all of them, but like there's like greens that

336
00:22:00,720 --> 00:22:04,399
Speaker 1: I just you're really missing out on super violet and

337
00:22:04,760 --> 00:22:08,640
Speaker 1: uh because I started s moping weed like summer going

338
00:22:08,680 --> 00:22:12,320
Speaker 1: into eighth grade or ninth grade. Oh you started in

339
00:22:12,400 --> 00:22:17,280
Speaker 1: ninth grade? Yeah, I started smoking. I started smoking summer

340
00:22:17,359 --> 00:22:22,840
Speaker 1: going into ninth grade. Damn, and like heavy some not heavy,

341
00:22:22,960 --> 00:22:30,800
Speaker 1: as I hadn't I hadn't seen a boob yet. Uh wait,

342
00:22:30,880 --> 00:22:32,720
Speaker 1: did I see a boot before I started? I saw

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Speaker 1: a boot before I started smoking. Nice, Yeah, I I

344
00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:40,359
Speaker 1: developed properly, but yeah, I started. So I started smoking

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00:22:40,359 --> 00:22:42,280
Speaker 1: when we when as a kid, So I like remember

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Speaker 1: smoking swag and like all that dumb ship. Yeah, no

347
00:22:45,760 --> 00:22:48,920
Speaker 1: I didn't. I didn't have to sift through the bullshit

348
00:22:49,040 --> 00:22:54,000
Speaker 1: too much to be a smoker, and now more than

349
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Speaker 1: I should to be responsible for a child. I know

350
00:23:00,760 --> 00:23:02,560
Speaker 1: a lot of people who have kids. Do they smoke

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00:23:02,600 --> 00:23:06,080
Speaker 1: weed all the time. Yeah, it's it's honestly, it makes

352
00:23:06,119 --> 00:23:09,280
Speaker 1: you more fun. But then you feel bad that you're like, damn,

353
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Speaker 1: why can't I be this fun just being myself? Yeah,

354
00:23:12,040 --> 00:23:14,159
Speaker 1: that's the whole problem with weed, Like why can't I

355
00:23:14,200 --> 00:23:18,280
Speaker 1: connect or do whatever this thing is? Yeah? Yeah, And

356
00:23:18,520 --> 00:23:21,440
Speaker 1: is this thing making me further from the individual I

357
00:23:21,520 --> 00:23:25,320
Speaker 1: would have been if I just wrote a sober train

358
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Speaker 1: all the way through this right, and I'm not using

359
00:23:27,760 --> 00:23:31,359
Speaker 1: this as a crutch to access my creativity that should

360
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Speaker 1: be accessible, you know the majority of the time proper diet,

361
00:23:36,400 --> 00:23:40,719
Speaker 1: exercise and like mindfulness and uh if I as soon

362
00:23:40,800 --> 00:23:44,760
Speaker 1: as I finished this, but I'm gonna really rethink some

363
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Speaker 1: of these choices. Yeah, no, I'm gonna spoke after we're

364
00:23:47,440 --> 00:23:49,920
Speaker 1: done here. But then because I gotta go mini golfing.

365
00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:53,600
Speaker 1: It's it's a weird week. It's a weird week. Don't

366
00:23:53,600 --> 00:23:58,119
Speaker 1: worry about what I'm doing. So you have, yeah, I

367
00:23:58,200 --> 00:24:01,760
Speaker 1: think an exciting siting. I went and checked my d

368
00:24:01,960 --> 00:24:03,960
Speaker 1: m s because I don't check them that often because

369
00:24:04,080 --> 00:24:06,440
Speaker 1: you know, there's a bunch of freaks in there, and

370
00:24:06,520 --> 00:24:10,200
Speaker 1: not like the cool like dirty naked freaks, more like, hey,

371
00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:12,040
Speaker 1: have you ever seen this? And then it's a video

372
00:24:12,080 --> 00:24:16,560
Speaker 1: about like did he killed Shrine's dad or some ship?

373
00:24:16,920 --> 00:24:19,280
Speaker 1: But this is from some Dutch guy who had something

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Speaker 1: to say to me. So I'm gonna played in the

375
00:24:21,000 --> 00:24:24,240
Speaker 1: microphone and we can unpack all this. I'm so excited.

376
00:24:24,760 --> 00:24:28,560
Speaker 1: Hello David and Langston. Actually, um, my name is Danish

377
00:24:29,160 --> 00:24:32,280
Speaker 1: Um from the Netherlands. I just heard your podcasts about

378
00:24:32,480 --> 00:24:36,359
Speaker 1: the Old Black paint debuccle. I'm not Dutch, I'm actually

379
00:24:36,440 --> 00:24:39,639
Speaker 1: Turkish from O. Let me put it that way. No,

380
00:24:39,920 --> 00:24:42,399
Speaker 1: Turkey does not funk with it. We do not know

381
00:24:42,560 --> 00:24:47,119
Speaker 1: this motherfucker called Santa Class. We don't actually support the

382
00:24:47,160 --> 00:24:50,160
Speaker 1: whole black paint thing which they call here in the Netherlands.

383
00:24:51,880 --> 00:24:55,960
Speaker 1: And he is actually a depiction of a slave, even

384
00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:59,080
Speaker 1: though they are in denial over here, like no, he's

385
00:24:59,160 --> 00:25:02,359
Speaker 1: just a white dude. It was smearing it so because

386
00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:05,879
Speaker 1: he's going down, up and down the chimney to deliver

387
00:25:06,000 --> 00:25:09,000
Speaker 1: their presence to the kids and all. Uh. And he

388
00:25:09,160 --> 00:25:13,200
Speaker 1: also you know, actually actually collides with his lips on

389
00:25:13,320 --> 00:25:16,320
Speaker 1: the bricks on the inside of the chimney. So that's

390
00:25:16,320 --> 00:25:19,040
Speaker 1: why they all swollen their red ship. Yeah, they have

391
00:25:19,160 --> 00:25:21,320
Speaker 1: their way with a whole lot of fairy tale points

392
00:25:21,760 --> 00:25:24,639
Speaker 1: racist nonetheless, Wait, there's a whole another one. There's a

393
00:25:24,640 --> 00:25:29,400
Speaker 1: whole another voice. Oh no. Also he rubs his big

394
00:25:29,520 --> 00:25:33,040
Speaker 1: fat lips down. There's fucking idiot's been going down chimneys

395
00:25:33,119 --> 00:25:39,600
Speaker 1: his whole life. You can't figure it out. I love

396
00:25:39,680 --> 00:25:45,679
Speaker 1: the bricks, take good or my sweet lips. I'm saying

397
00:25:45,760 --> 00:25:49,320
Speaker 1: it's any Dutch guys who are shorter than six foots

398
00:25:49,359 --> 00:25:52,520
Speaker 1: on side. Hett are good. With the Netherlands, there's this

399
00:25:53,000 --> 00:25:58,520
Speaker 1: Bible Belt specific area which are heavy on the tradition

400
00:25:58,600 --> 00:26:02,000
Speaker 1: of celebrating simple Us and having ship changed to it.

401
00:26:03,000 --> 00:26:06,640
Speaker 1: So that's why there's whole up people about changing Black

402
00:26:06,720 --> 00:26:10,320
Speaker 1: Pete Pete. But you know, I feel like the kids,

403
00:26:10,760 --> 00:26:12,600
Speaker 1: they don't give a funk. They just want the candy

404
00:26:12,680 --> 00:26:16,679
Speaker 1: and toys. So you know, change Black Pete to something,

405
00:26:16,840 --> 00:26:20,080
Speaker 1: uh you know, white guy with some patches of black.

406
00:26:21,040 --> 00:26:24,440
Speaker 1: They don't care. So that's even something they do. I

407
00:26:24,480 --> 00:26:26,879
Speaker 1: don't like doing, but I Dutch crack is what you

408
00:26:26,960 --> 00:26:29,879
Speaker 1: gotta say. My moment told me I should be an

409
00:26:29,880 --> 00:26:32,879
Speaker 1: investor for the international affairs like you would, and so

410
00:26:33,040 --> 00:26:35,080
Speaker 1: hit me up whenever you need to know something about

411
00:26:35,119 --> 00:26:41,639
Speaker 1: Europe or something in these regions. I did, Hey, thanks Dennis,

412
00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:46,200
Speaker 1: you can't. We were nervous about you. Dennis. We thought

413
00:26:46,240 --> 00:26:48,879
Speaker 1: you were Dutch and and we had out but he

414
00:26:49,119 --> 00:26:51,960
Speaker 1: was like, no, I'm Turkish. It's cool. You gave me

415
00:26:52,080 --> 00:26:57,960
Speaker 1: tish and you came correct and we respected. So so

416
00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:02,200
Speaker 1: Black Pete has big swall Olan slave lips from kissing

417
00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:06,080
Speaker 1: bricks because it's dumbass. Can't get down a chimney. God,

418
00:27:06,240 --> 00:27:10,720
Speaker 1: they hate our guts. Man, that's that's so imaginative, that's

419
00:27:10,760 --> 00:27:13,320
Speaker 1: so guts in a way that you know they've never

420
00:27:13,480 --> 00:27:16,800
Speaker 1: met us, because why else would you hate us so deep? Yeah,

421
00:27:17,440 --> 00:27:20,600
Speaker 1: like you. You think my lips are so big, they're

422
00:27:20,800 --> 00:27:25,399
Speaker 1: so ethnic that they I can't even pull them in

423
00:27:26,160 --> 00:27:36,359
Speaker 1: enough to keep them off chimney bricks. I can't. Oh man,

424
00:27:41,160 --> 00:27:46,800
Speaker 1: it's just so do Come on, man, Dutch people, listen,

425
00:27:47,080 --> 00:27:49,959
Speaker 1: if if it's if it's this hot, if you truly

426
00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:53,400
Speaker 1: are are this angry at us, we gotta figure out something, man.

427
00:27:53,480 --> 00:27:59,840
Speaker 1: We can't keep it going alliances. Yeah, this is unhealthy.

428
00:28:00,359 --> 00:28:03,200
Speaker 1: If there are any Dutch listeners out there, Uh, we

429
00:28:03,320 --> 00:28:06,879
Speaker 1: want to raise a white flag and no no no,

430
00:28:06,960 --> 00:28:08,720
Speaker 1: no no, no no no no we're not not no

431
00:28:08,880 --> 00:28:10,000
Speaker 1: no no no no no no no no no no.

432
00:28:10,240 --> 00:28:12,280
Speaker 1: A flag of truce is what I'm aiming for. Not

433
00:28:15,160 --> 00:28:20,600
Speaker 1: we don't have who's your little because he gets it

434
00:28:20,720 --> 00:28:24,920
Speaker 1: caught in the Christmas tree? Whatever, raceist nonsense. I ain't

435
00:28:24,920 --> 00:28:27,360
Speaker 1: giving up ship. I'm saying you guys need to back

436
00:28:27,440 --> 00:28:31,639
Speaker 1: the funk off because it's getting crazy. You're right, I

437
00:28:31,840 --> 00:28:34,960
Speaker 1: was out of line. I we shouldn't be conceding anything.

438
00:28:35,560 --> 00:28:37,800
Speaker 1: I I do think we have to figure out a

439
00:28:37,880 --> 00:28:40,640
Speaker 1: way to to squash this beef. And I think you

440
00:28:40,800 --> 00:28:45,280
Speaker 1: all need to come with with hat in hand, silly

441
00:28:45,400 --> 00:28:49,280
Speaker 1: goofy fucking hat in your goofy fucking hand, so that

442
00:28:49,440 --> 00:28:52,040
Speaker 1: we can have a real conversation about where this hatred

443
00:28:52,120 --> 00:28:54,280
Speaker 1: comes from. And don't and don't try to play us soft.

444
00:28:54,320 --> 00:28:56,320
Speaker 1: Don't try to play catis with like, you know, some

445
00:28:56,480 --> 00:29:00,880
Speaker 1: gowns of lead, lead, tasty paint or whatever, just because

446
00:29:00,920 --> 00:29:03,680
Speaker 1: you know we'll eat it because we're stupid. We would,

447
00:29:03,920 --> 00:29:10,640
Speaker 1: and so what that doesn't change why you're bad. Complicated

448
00:29:10,880 --> 00:29:14,880
Speaker 1: International finis are complicated. They are complicated. But I'm glad

449
00:29:14,920 --> 00:29:17,240
Speaker 1: that we have Dennis in our corner to help us

450
00:29:17,360 --> 00:29:20,000
Speaker 1: navigate at least some of this ship. No, shout out

451
00:29:20,040 --> 00:29:22,840
Speaker 1: to Dennis, Shout out to dinnist shout and shout out

452
00:29:22,880 --> 00:29:26,280
Speaker 1: to Corey for sending us all of this information he

453
00:29:26,400 --> 00:29:30,600
Speaker 1: got out of the evidence file at his his work,

454
00:29:31,400 --> 00:29:38,360
Speaker 1: at his cop job. When what was that what was

455
00:29:38,480 --> 00:29:41,680
Speaker 1: that mask James James Harden wore And then he was like, oh,

456
00:29:41,760 --> 00:29:45,680
Speaker 1: I didn't know remember that? Oh yeah, you had the

457
00:29:45,760 --> 00:29:53,840
Speaker 1: Blue Lives Matter mass Yeah, I'm James Harden not never

458
00:29:53,920 --> 00:29:57,360
Speaker 1: been on the internet. Did you Okay? And this is

459
00:29:57,640 --> 00:29:59,880
Speaker 1: maybe the best way to end this. Did you believe

460
00:30:00,120 --> 00:30:03,040
Speaker 1: James Harden when he said he didn't know? Yeah? Weirdly

461
00:30:03,120 --> 00:30:05,920
Speaker 1: I did. I think did he? I think he's some

462
00:30:06,120 --> 00:30:11,920
Speaker 1: kind of a weird not man baby, but some type

463
00:30:11,960 --> 00:30:15,480
Speaker 1: of a weird like he's in such an athletic bubble.

464
00:30:15,640 --> 00:30:20,240
Speaker 1: I don't think James Harden knows anything that's happening outside

465
00:30:20,320 --> 00:30:24,360
Speaker 1: of basketball. Yeah, No, I don't either, I for he doesn't.

466
00:30:24,600 --> 00:30:27,520
Speaker 1: He seems unbothered in a way where it's like, oh,

467
00:30:27,640 --> 00:30:30,280
Speaker 1: you just don't know what's going on. Yeah, it seems

468
00:30:30,280 --> 00:30:33,840
Speaker 1: like if it's not if it's not basketball stripper or

469
00:30:33,880 --> 00:30:37,120
Speaker 1: a little baby related, James hardenn ain up on none

470
00:30:37,160 --> 00:30:40,760
Speaker 1: of it. I don't think he knows anything about it. Yeah.

471
00:30:40,840 --> 00:30:43,560
Speaker 1: I think that he grew the beard and everything shrouded

472
00:30:44,240 --> 00:30:47,360
Speaker 1: like a s you like sun devil Harden. I think

473
00:30:47,400 --> 00:30:50,360
Speaker 1: that he was wise to the world. He knew about atrocities.

474
00:30:50,600 --> 00:30:54,640
Speaker 1: This James he doesn't know. Yeah, yeah, mohawk, no facial hair.

475
00:30:54,840 --> 00:30:58,640
Speaker 1: James Harden was a wise learned man and then somewhere

476
00:30:58,760 --> 00:31:02,480
Speaker 1: that facial hair all the juices out of his brain

477
00:31:02,560 --> 00:31:07,920
Speaker 1: and now he just he just oops and and uh yeah,

478
00:31:08,000 --> 00:31:11,200
Speaker 1: weird amount of money on silly clothes sometimes that I

479
00:31:11,400 --> 00:31:13,600
Speaker 1: asked you to back the Blue you know. Yeah, I

480
00:31:13,640 --> 00:31:19,400
Speaker 1: don't think he even knows. He thought it was supporting

481
00:31:19,440 --> 00:31:24,160
Speaker 1: the Detroit Pistons. He's like, yeah, I might play there something. Yeah,

482
00:31:30,240 --> 00:31:32,440
Speaker 1: well I think we did it. I think we nailed

483
00:31:32,520 --> 00:31:35,320
Speaker 1: this whole thing. BORI could you could you tell the

484
00:31:35,360 --> 00:31:37,440
Speaker 1: people where they can find you and what cool ship

485
00:31:37,560 --> 00:31:40,000
Speaker 1: you have going on? You can find me a cool

486
00:31:40,080 --> 00:31:43,960
Speaker 1: guy jokes eighties seven on Instagram. Come to the newly

487
00:31:44,120 --> 00:31:49,560
Speaker 1: rebranded High Note Comedy in Denver on January twenty. We

488
00:31:49,680 --> 00:31:54,760
Speaker 1: got your boy Rob Hayes headlining. Then come see me

489
00:31:55,000 --> 00:31:58,880
Speaker 1: January in Portland. It's gonna be the same stuff I

490
00:31:58,960 --> 00:32:00,920
Speaker 1: did last month. But here, you know, I got some

491
00:32:00,960 --> 00:32:08,080
Speaker 1: new ship too. Ju I'm gonna be in Great Falls, Montana.

492
00:32:11,200 --> 00:32:13,440
Speaker 1: I don't know, I have no idea. I'm gonna be

493
00:32:13,480 --> 00:32:16,719
Speaker 1: at the Newbery January and then you know, I got

494
00:32:16,800 --> 00:32:20,160
Speaker 1: some other ship coming up. Appreciate you. Hell yeah, and

495
00:32:20,400 --> 00:32:22,840
Speaker 1: and please come to our Lives show. We have a

496
00:32:22,960 --> 00:32:26,479
Speaker 1: live show coming up in February. February sixteenth. That's at

497
00:32:26,520 --> 00:32:29,640
Speaker 1: the Allegian here in Los Angeles, seven thirty. You can

498
00:32:29,720 --> 00:32:33,360
Speaker 1: buy tickets online now, so so do that. We would

499
00:32:33,360 --> 00:32:35,920
Speaker 1: love to see from you, bitches. Don't don't you make

500
00:32:36,040 --> 00:32:38,840
Speaker 1: us do this ship alone. We will, We will be

501
00:32:39,080 --> 00:32:42,840
Speaker 1: fucking furious. If it's gonna be, it's gonna be. Come

502
00:32:42,920 --> 00:32:46,840
Speaker 1: to the Allegian. Bring your pistols, Bring your pistols. Why not.

503
00:32:47,680 --> 00:32:51,360
Speaker 1: I'm gonna bring my nun chucks. So so I'm worried

504
00:32:51,360 --> 00:32:53,560
Speaker 1: about you. That was That was a given. That was

505
00:32:53,600 --> 00:32:56,760
Speaker 1: a never never had to worry about the number chuck.

506
00:32:56,920 --> 00:32:59,760
Speaker 1: The Chuck's gonna be on. I keep them chucks on me.

507
00:33:00,240 --> 00:33:07,760
Speaker 1: Don't even he got an ankle strap. I might wear

508
00:33:07,840 --> 00:33:10,080
Speaker 1: shorts and move the ankle strap up to my time.

509
00:33:10,240 --> 00:33:16,280
Speaker 1: Let's see what happens, oh man. But yeah, come out

510
00:33:16,320 --> 00:33:18,320
Speaker 1: and see us. Guys. You're gonna be fun. Come to

511
00:33:18,440 --> 00:33:21,120
Speaker 1: the live show. And as always, you can now see

512
00:33:21,200 --> 00:33:24,720
Speaker 1: us on YouTube. We have a YouTube channel. Mama told

513
00:33:24,800 --> 00:33:27,800
Speaker 1: me YouTube, So please watch the watch us there. If

514
00:33:27,840 --> 00:33:30,320
Speaker 1: you're listening and you want to see what our faces

515
00:33:30,400 --> 00:33:32,920
Speaker 1: look like, this is the time to do it. That

516
00:33:33,080 --> 00:33:36,240
Speaker 1: keeps to the already like two people who subscribed already.

517
00:33:36,440 --> 00:33:41,960
Speaker 1: Oh fuck yeah, it's like subs that's pretty good. We're

518
00:33:42,000 --> 00:33:44,680
Speaker 1: doing solid, but we can do better and you pieces

519
00:33:44,680 --> 00:33:48,120
Speaker 1: of ship have that have that option to help. You know, listen,

520
00:33:48,240 --> 00:33:51,400
Speaker 1: if we get to a thousand subscribers, Langston will record

521
00:33:52,120 --> 00:33:56,480
Speaker 1: a nun chuck tutorial. Oh that'd be tight. I actually

522
00:33:56,800 --> 00:33:59,920
Speaker 1: have been meaning to. That's been one of my that's

523
00:34:00,000 --> 00:34:04,440
Speaker 1: on one of my New Year's resolutions is you got up. Yeah,

524
00:34:04,440 --> 00:34:08,719
Speaker 1: you gotta get good with the chucks, baby. So I

525
00:34:08,800 --> 00:34:10,960
Speaker 1: got a little bit of time, but but yeah, I'll

526
00:34:11,000 --> 00:34:13,280
Speaker 1: show you all what I can do. Alright, because we're

527
00:34:13,280 --> 00:34:16,799
Speaker 1: already at three d thirty seven subscribers. Oh all right,

528
00:34:17,880 --> 00:34:19,799
Speaker 1: you gotta hang up soon and get on it. Yeah,

529
00:34:19,920 --> 00:34:21,799
Speaker 1: you might gotta go back to class, bring the right.

530
00:34:25,360 --> 00:34:27,800
Speaker 1: But as always, you can follow me at Langston Kerman

531
00:34:27,880 --> 00:34:30,880
Speaker 1: on on all the social media and and please if

532
00:34:30,920 --> 00:34:32,640
Speaker 1: you want to send us your own drops, your own

533
00:34:32,680 --> 00:34:36,080
Speaker 1: conspiracy theories, If you want to send us your nunchuck tutorials,

534
00:34:36,160 --> 00:34:39,319
Speaker 1: please send them to my Mama pod at gmail dot com.

535
00:34:39,440 --> 00:34:41,879
Speaker 1: We would love to hear from you. That's it. That's

536
00:34:41,920 --> 00:34:53,560
Speaker 1: all by bitch, motherfucking many years so motherfucking mini year,

537
00:34:53,719 --> 00:35:03,239
Speaker 1: so motherfucking mini year. So many years so well, the

538
00:35:03,320 --> 00:35:04,480
Speaker 1: fucking many ears so