WEBVTT - Jess on Figuring Out ‘Paradise’ 0:00:02.000 --> 0:00:04.680 Hey, everyone, welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hour. I'm Joe 0:00:04.760 --> 0:00:07.400 and I'm Serena and we are here with none other 0:00:07.480 --> 0:00:09.240 than Jess from Bachelor and Paradise. 0:00:10.119 --> 0:00:12.159 Just welcome, Thanks for having me. 0:00:12.240 --> 0:00:16.520 I'm excited, of course. How are you I'm not too bad. 0:00:16.560 --> 0:00:18.080 How are you guys? Good? 0:00:18.280 --> 0:00:18.520 Good? 0:00:19.040 --> 0:00:26.560 Last time I had you on was Clickbait for Zach Season. Yes, yeah, 0:00:27.680 --> 0:00:31.760 so a lot has happened since then. Let's get into 0:00:33.040 --> 0:00:36.320 going to Bachelor in Paradise. What were you looking for 0:00:37.080 --> 0:00:37.760 in a partner? 0:00:38.840 --> 0:00:41.640 Yeah, so I you know, I don't really put myself 0:00:41.680 --> 0:00:45.040 out there, so my going to Boucher in Paradise was 0:00:45.240 --> 0:00:47.880 just kind of like a let me just make myself 0:00:47.920 --> 0:00:51.600 uncomfortable again and like try again and try to find 0:00:51.640 --> 0:00:56.760 my lifelong partner. And to me, my non negotiables are 0:00:56.800 --> 0:00:59.880 just someone not makes me feel like I'm you and 0:01:00.160 --> 0:01:04.720 person in the room, and someone that's very attentive and 0:01:04.800 --> 0:01:07.960 caring and patient because it does take me a while 0:01:08.000 --> 0:01:10.960 to open up. So someone that's not that doesn't see 0:01:11.000 --> 0:01:13.000 that as like a bad thing I would say. 0:01:13.920 --> 0:01:16.919 Before God, Yeah, can I ask what your dating history 0:01:17.040 --> 0:01:19.720 was like prior to going on Zach Season? 0:01:20.760 --> 0:01:25.280 Yeah, so I've only had two boyfriends and nothing in between, 0:01:25.440 --> 0:01:31.199 so I'm very like tunnel vision person and the last 0:01:31.240 --> 0:01:34.200 my last relationship before Zach season, I thought I was 0:01:34.240 --> 0:01:36.160 going to marry him and it was like the worst 0:01:36.160 --> 0:01:38.560 heartbreak that I've ever been through, and that's why my 0:01:38.640 --> 0:01:43.960 friends signed me up. So I definitely am not that experience. 0:01:44.000 --> 0:01:45.240 So I'm learning as I go. 0:01:47.080 --> 0:01:51.320 That's fair knowing knowing the way Bachelor in Paradise operates. 0:01:52.200 --> 0:01:55.240 Did you prepare yourself at all for potentially being in 0:01:56.480 --> 0:01:59.040 a love triangle. 0:01:58.920 --> 0:02:02.040 Or yeah, because it's like you're like a serial monogamous, 0:02:02.080 --> 0:02:04.800 like your relationship girly is the vibe I'm getting. 0:02:05.160 --> 0:02:08.320 Yeah, I think it actually ended up being a fault 0:02:08.360 --> 0:02:10.680 that I was so stuck on not being in a 0:02:10.720 --> 0:02:14.080 love shrigle and I was so afraid of that. My 0:02:14.240 --> 0:02:17.600 biggest thing for myself going into it was to be respectful, 0:02:18.080 --> 0:02:22.440 and I think that in turn, you know, I think 0:02:22.480 --> 0:02:25.560 in Paradise like you have to be selfish, and I 0:02:25.720 --> 0:02:27.360 just like that was like something that I was so 0:02:27.440 --> 0:02:29.040 fearful of and didn't want to do. 0:02:30.720 --> 0:02:33.800 Well, yeah, you've seen so I feel like a big 0:02:33.880 --> 0:02:38.480 part of the issue is you're very likable and you 0:02:38.560 --> 0:02:40.680 have a lot of friends, a lot of the girls 0:02:40.720 --> 0:02:46.360 are friends with you, and you don't want to stop 0:02:46.400 --> 0:02:49.640 out anyone's toes, and unfortunately, in a place like Paradise, 0:02:50.200 --> 0:02:53.320 you almost have to write. 0:02:53.120 --> 0:02:54.400 Yeah, I agree. 0:02:55.200 --> 0:02:57.280 Yeah, Like Joe and I have talked a lot about 0:02:57.480 --> 0:03:00.520 the benefit of being someone like an Eliza or even 0:03:00.520 --> 0:03:03.040 like a Blake that comes down and like it's not 0:03:03.240 --> 0:03:05.480 their entire cast down there, so it's kind of like 0:03:05.520 --> 0:03:07.320 if they want to hop or even like Will, like 0:03:07.520 --> 0:03:09.600 Will was talking to all the girl these day one 0:03:09.639 --> 0:03:11.519 because he's like, I don't care if my stuff on 0:03:11.600 --> 0:03:13.640 these guys toes. I don't even know these guys. Whereas 0:03:13.680 --> 0:03:15.960 like for someone like you, like I was in your shoes, 0:03:16.000 --> 0:03:17.800 like there was quite a few girls for my season, 0:03:17.919 --> 0:03:21.560 it's like if I know so and So's into this guy, 0:03:21.720 --> 0:03:24.640 like I don't want to, you know, put myself in 0:03:24.720 --> 0:03:26.880 between that even if they might be into me. Right, 0:03:27.000 --> 0:03:28.959 is that kind of the dynamic you felt like you were. 0:03:28.840 --> 0:03:29.720 In one hundred percent? 0:03:29.919 --> 0:03:32.639 And I think for me, like obviously the girls, like 0:03:32.680 --> 0:03:34.800 we all talked about who we're hopeful to see and 0:03:34.840 --> 0:03:37.360 like we kind of have like an understanding of like 0:03:37.360 --> 0:03:37.880 you kind of have. 0:03:37.840 --> 0:03:38.960 To do what you have to do. 0:03:39.480 --> 0:03:41.800 But like getting there and being there, I was just 0:03:41.880 --> 0:03:45.080 like I was just really overwhelmed and anxious, and I 0:03:45.120 --> 0:03:48.240 just didn't I think I again, like I was just 0:03:48.280 --> 0:03:50.800 scared to hurt people's feelings and even girls that I 0:03:50.880 --> 0:03:52.520 was just meeting, Like I didn't I just didn't want 0:03:52.520 --> 0:03:55.760 to sit by anyone's toes. And there's there's a lot 0:03:55.800 --> 0:03:58.320 that I'm learning looking back and watching myself for sure. 0:03:59.520 --> 0:04:02.800 Who were the guys that you were interested in meeting 0:04:02.800 --> 0:04:05.360 that you kind of talked about in advance like going 0:04:05.400 --> 0:04:05.720 on the show. 0:04:05.800 --> 0:04:09.160 Yeah, so I was very hopeful to see Tanner or 0:04:09.200 --> 0:04:11.400 Tyler on the beach, Like those were the two guys 0:04:11.440 --> 0:04:14.839 that I felt like I could see myself with. 0:04:15.040 --> 0:04:16.640 Obviously, I'm like just. 0:04:17.160 --> 0:04:20.240 Delusional, like keep coming up with like what their personalities 0:04:20.240 --> 0:04:22.320 are like in my mind, like I don't actually know them. 0:04:22.680 --> 0:04:24.520 So I went into it knowing like, Okay, we like 0:04:24.600 --> 0:04:27.000 these guys are attractive and like, but I don't know 0:04:27.000 --> 0:04:29.919 anything about them, so like I need to meet them first. 0:04:30.800 --> 0:04:33.680 But you know, Blake was not someone that I thought 0:04:33.960 --> 0:04:36.320 but him and I would connect with right away. So 0:04:36.640 --> 0:04:38.800 that was definitely like taken by surprise, and I was 0:04:39.880 --> 0:04:42.360 very excited about it because it was more of like, oh, 0:04:42.400 --> 0:04:44.640 I didn't see this coming, and I actually like that it's, 0:04:44.839 --> 0:04:47.760 you know, something I didn't predict. 0:04:48.520 --> 0:04:50.760 Nice. I want to get more into the the Blake 0:04:51.240 --> 0:04:54.760 the Blake stuff of it all. But Tanner is somebody 0:04:54.760 --> 0:04:57.320 that you were interested also somebody Cat was interested in. 0:04:58.279 --> 0:05:00.520 We see Tanner takes Cat out of a date. You 0:05:00.600 --> 0:05:02.680 and Kat are friends. Did you guys have a conversation 0:05:02.800 --> 0:05:05.559 about Tanner prior to going on the show. 0:05:05.800 --> 0:05:07.680 Yeah, prior to the show, we both knew that that 0:05:07.839 --> 0:05:11.480 was someone we were both mutually interested in. You know, 0:05:11.880 --> 0:05:14.640 I did my best to not make it a think. 0:05:14.680 --> 0:05:17.400 I just think naturally, like it's just a bummer to 0:05:17.520 --> 0:05:20.880 not be chosen when you're like picturing and imagining what 0:05:20.920 --> 0:05:23.400 it could be like with someone. And so I think 0:05:23.400 --> 0:05:25.000 for me, like it was just like I was just 0:05:25.040 --> 0:05:27.479 bummed and overwhelmed by the fact that, like, you know, 0:05:27.560 --> 0:05:29.800 he took my best friend and it was like almost 0:05:29.839 --> 0:05:31.679 like a turn off for me to want to pursue 0:05:31.760 --> 0:05:35.080 him after that. But you know, he there was nothing, 0:05:35.160 --> 0:05:38.120 no one did anything wrong, Like she I it could 0:05:38.120 --> 0:05:39.520 have been me going on that date, you know. 0:05:39.640 --> 0:05:42.120 So I was never angry with anyone. It was just 0:05:42.120 --> 0:05:42.960 a bummer. 0:05:44.200 --> 0:05:46.240 We we do. I think it was. I think it 0:05:46.279 --> 0:05:49.240 was in the truth box, but I feel like someone 0:05:49.279 --> 0:05:52.360 else on the on this podcast I mentioned that about 0:05:52.400 --> 0:05:55.320 your relationship with Cat, where I think somebody wrote like 0:05:55.440 --> 0:05:58.680 Jess needs to watch out for Kat and if it 0:05:58.680 --> 0:05:59.280 feels like. 0:06:00.080 --> 0:06:07.120 Yeah, I know what they said, it was said, it 0:06:07.160 --> 0:06:09.599 wasn't like as ominous. I think it was like Kat 0:06:09.680 --> 0:06:11.920 is being as good of a friend to Jess as 0:06:11.920 --> 0:06:14.719 she thinks she is, or something along those lines. Do 0:06:14.760 --> 0:06:17.560 you want to provide any like context or what that 0:06:17.600 --> 0:06:19.359 person meant. I feel like it was like shown and 0:06:19.400 --> 0:06:22.359 then just like never ever addressed, Like they just like 0:06:22.440 --> 0:06:24.760 threw that out there. So if you want to speak, well, 0:06:24.800 --> 0:06:25.640 I mean. 0:06:25.560 --> 0:06:27.839 I remembered like that just throwing me off, like it 0:06:27.920 --> 0:06:30.760 was very random. I think at the time a lot 0:06:30.800 --> 0:06:32.960 of people had a lot of anger towards Cat, so 0:06:33.040 --> 0:06:36.039 they were kind of just like finding things to contribute 0:06:36.080 --> 0:06:36.960 to that. 0:06:38.400 --> 0:06:39.200 I think some. 0:06:39.080 --> 0:06:43.560 People thought maybe that I wasn't going to pursue Tanner 0:06:43.600 --> 0:06:45.760 because of that, so maybe that was their perspective of 0:06:45.800 --> 0:06:48.159 saying that. But it didn't become a thing, Like we 0:06:48.160 --> 0:06:51.560 didn't have a conversation about that. I know Cat's intentions 0:06:51.920 --> 0:06:54.159 and I don't think she's a bad friend. 0:06:53.920 --> 0:06:59.920 So I want to know, so Tanner takes Cat on 0:07:00.080 --> 0:07:02.800 the date you said you were kind of turned off 0:07:02.800 --> 0:07:08.600 by that was your desire to not pursue Tanner anymore 0:07:09.080 --> 0:07:12.440 from your loyalty to Cat? Or was it more like 0:07:12.720 --> 0:07:15.160 if you wanted me, you had the chance, and now 0:07:15.240 --> 0:07:17.280 like you didn't take me in that doors post or 0:07:17.320 --> 0:07:18.679 was it maybe I was a little. 0:07:18.480 --> 0:07:18.960 Bit of both. 0:07:19.080 --> 0:07:22.440 I mean, you know, obviously paradise, like you can't get 0:07:22.440 --> 0:07:24.360 your feelings hurt, people are gonna come down and they're 0:07:24.400 --> 0:07:27.800 gonna pick someone from a twenty second conversation. Looking back, 0:07:27.840 --> 0:07:30.440 I understand that, and I'm like very aware of it. 0:07:30.520 --> 0:07:33.000 But in the moment, I think I took it personal 0:07:33.040 --> 0:07:35.840 and it was like, okay, well, like I want my 0:07:36.000 --> 0:07:38.680 man to come down and be like, oh, like I 0:07:38.840 --> 0:07:41.440 like you right away, and you know. 0:07:41.400 --> 0:07:43.840 The con you wanted to have him do, like with 0:07:44.000 --> 0:07:47.320 Davia Dimmer Tanner, like one convo, be like I and. 0:07:47.440 --> 0:07:50.360 To be honest, Like watching it back, it was such 0:07:50.400 --> 0:07:53.080 an awkward conversation, like that was the first time a 0:07:53.120 --> 0:07:55.160 god pulled me so like I didn't know what to 0:07:55.200 --> 0:07:55.720 talk about. 0:07:55.760 --> 0:07:58.000 I remember like looking around a lot, being like I 0:07:58.040 --> 0:08:00.280 don't know, like am I leading this conversation? And like 0:08:00.440 --> 0:08:01.120 what do I ask? 0:08:01.240 --> 0:08:03.760 Like I hadn't Like I like I wasn't prepped for 0:08:03.920 --> 0:08:05.480 and not that you need to be prepped to have 0:08:05.520 --> 0:08:07.800 a conversation, but like I was just like it wasn't 0:08:07.840 --> 0:08:10.000 my best So looking back, I see why he picked 0:08:10.040 --> 0:08:13.320 Kat obviously, like I was so awkward and Cat's amazing, But. 0:08:14.800 --> 0:08:17.800 Yeah, I don't know, it wasn't the best conversation. But yes, 0:08:17.840 --> 0:08:18.880 I wanted to be chosen. 0:08:18.960 --> 0:08:21.240 I wanted someone to be like I was so excited 0:08:21.280 --> 0:08:23.280 to meet Jess and I want to like get to 0:08:23.320 --> 0:08:24.480 know Jess. 0:08:25.560 --> 0:08:30.520 And where were you in Blake at that at that time, 0:08:30.600 --> 0:08:32.800 like where was your relation? What was your relationship stare. 0:08:32.840 --> 0:08:33.760 When Tanner came down. 0:08:35.240 --> 0:08:37.400 Yeah, yeah, I mean I think that was like only 0:08:37.440 --> 0:08:41.839 a couple of days in Blake and I were still 0:08:41.840 --> 0:08:42.720 getting to know each other. 0:08:42.760 --> 0:08:45.319 I would say it was still very like almost. 0:08:45.040 --> 0:08:50.240 Surface level because it was so so fresh. So I 0:08:49.720 --> 0:08:52.400 I think I remembered. I don't know if I'm wrong 0:08:52.480 --> 0:08:53.520 if the bonfire was. 0:08:53.480 --> 0:08:54.600 Before or after Tanner. 0:08:54.679 --> 0:08:56.760 I think it was before, so like he said at 0:08:56.760 --> 0:08:59.800 the bonfire, like he was still open and so I 0:08:59.840 --> 0:09:02.200 mean I knew that, like it wouldn't be a bad 0:09:02.240 --> 0:09:03.959 thing if I went on that date because we were 0:09:04.000 --> 0:09:05.400 on the same page about being open. 0:09:07.120 --> 0:09:16.480 Okay, totally, and that makes sense. I want to know, 0:09:16.960 --> 0:09:21.079 how would you describe yourself, Like would you describe yourself 0:09:21.080 --> 0:09:23.440 as a flirt? Do you like to pursue do you 0:09:23.480 --> 0:09:26.160 like guys to pursue you? Because like I agree like 0:09:26.200 --> 0:09:29.319 that comment, like you don't strike me as an awkward individual, 0:09:29.320 --> 0:09:31.480 like having a conversation with you right now, but I 0:09:31.520 --> 0:09:33.600 feel like, yeah, like some of the comments we've seen 0:09:33.640 --> 0:09:35.760 with like Tanner, like it seems like you may be 0:09:35.920 --> 0:09:38.040 like the guy to take the lead. But I'm just curious. 0:09:38.080 --> 0:09:40.680 I really am not that awkward, to be honest, Like 0:09:40.720 --> 0:09:41.480 I'm really not. 0:09:41.760 --> 0:09:44.800 Like this show is LISTENID, We're all we are we 0:09:44.880 --> 0:09:47.240 are when we go on this show, we are all all. 0:09:47.480 --> 0:09:50.760 Like you're talking to like the king of the show. 0:09:50.840 --> 0:09:52.920 I did the show twice. In my first conversation with 0:09:52.960 --> 0:09:55.120 Serena might have been the most awkward. 0:09:55.360 --> 0:09:57.120 It was the most I ever had my lege. 0:09:57.240 --> 0:10:01.559 I told her, I told her, I heard this is 0:10:01.600 --> 0:10:04.600 what I said. I said I heard Toronto is an 0:10:04.679 --> 0:10:07.240 ugly city, but. 0:10:06.679 --> 0:10:09.640 But no, you said, I heard Toronto's ugly on the outside, 0:10:09.880 --> 0:10:12.240 but beautiful on the inside. 0:10:11.840 --> 0:10:14.760 Probably like you, but I don't know what your insides 0:10:14.800 --> 0:10:17.280 look like. That is what I said. 0:10:17.360 --> 0:10:20.120 That was the first thing. 0:10:21.960 --> 0:10:26.360 So don't feel bad about these like little clippets or 0:10:26.480 --> 0:10:29.120 little snippets of if you feel like you look awkward 0:10:29.200 --> 0:10:31.600 like Joe, Joe takes the cake on that one girl. 0:10:32.240 --> 0:10:37.880 Yeah, yeah, no, I think for me, like I'm and 0:10:37.920 --> 0:10:40.120 I've said this so many times and like honestly, I'm 0:10:40.160 --> 0:10:42.440 proud of it. Like I'm just not a reality TV girl, 0:10:42.480 --> 0:10:48.440 Like I'm just not and I definitely like a guy 0:10:48.559 --> 0:10:52.480 to pursue me and take the lead, especially because in 0:10:52.600 --> 0:10:55.840 general I think that people assume, like taking your time 0:10:55.840 --> 0:10:58.320 to open up means you're awkward, and like that's just 0:10:58.360 --> 0:11:00.480 not the case for me, Like I just I protect 0:11:00.559 --> 0:11:02.520 myself and it picks me a while to get comfortable. 0:11:02.559 --> 0:11:04.760 And once I'm comfortable, like I'm always yapping and I'm 0:11:04.760 --> 0:11:07.160 always like going off or whatever. I don't know, but 0:11:07.240 --> 0:11:09.920 like I just like I like when a guy leads 0:11:09.960 --> 0:11:14.480 the conversation and makes me feel comfortable, and I feel 0:11:14.480 --> 0:11:17.240 like I feel like an opposite attract kind of thing 0:11:17.320 --> 0:11:18.120 is really good for me. 0:11:20.320 --> 0:11:23.120 So did you feel like you've had that with Blake? 0:11:23.200 --> 0:11:26.080 Yeah, I think Blake is he is not an awkward 0:11:26.120 --> 0:11:29.560 person at all, Like he will laugh at like if 0:11:29.600 --> 0:11:31.920 I say something and I'm embarrassed, Like he just like 0:11:31.960 --> 0:11:34.320 automatically makes me feel better about it. Like he never 0:11:34.720 --> 0:11:37.480 I never felt like I needed to like be careful 0:11:37.520 --> 0:11:38.960 of what I was going to say and like think 0:11:39.000 --> 0:11:40.880 about what I was going to say. Like he was 0:11:41.080 --> 0:11:45.440 very just like attentive and easy to talk to. And 0:11:45.520 --> 0:11:48.280 I feel like that type of personality like Tanner was 0:11:48.360 --> 0:11:50.720 like also a little bit shy and like nervous, and 0:11:50.760 --> 0:11:52.920 I feel like when you put too shy nervous people together, 0:11:53.000 --> 0:11:56.080 it's just like we're like talking about colors. So you know, 0:11:56.280 --> 0:11:59.920 Like it's so I think the personality of like Blake 0:12:00.040 --> 0:12:02.600 and like other people, like that's kind of what I 0:12:02.679 --> 0:12:03.760 gravitate towards more. 0:12:06.000 --> 0:12:10.440 Do you feel like your relationship with Blake was leaning 0:12:10.480 --> 0:12:17.280 more towards the friendship side opposed to the romantic romantic. 0:12:17.400 --> 0:12:21.040 Yeah, it's hard to say. 0:12:21.760 --> 0:12:22.840 At this point. 0:12:22.720 --> 0:12:26.000 Let's says yet to talk about. Like the whole time 0:12:26.040 --> 0:12:27.839 I'm sure, like you know that we know there's more 0:12:27.880 --> 0:12:29.320 to come. No, No, you're good. 0:12:29.760 --> 0:12:34.160 Let's say before before you had opened up about being 0:12:34.200 --> 0:12:38.760 interested in still seeing other people, before that moment, before. 0:12:38.559 --> 0:12:41.360 Truth through Dare, Yeah, let's go there before truth or Dare, 0:12:42.240 --> 0:12:45.239 Where are you guys at? Like on a friendship levels? 0:12:45.520 --> 0:12:48.480 I think it was like a very like. 0:12:50.120 --> 0:12:52.280 I would say, in the middle of both, like like 0:12:52.360 --> 0:12:55.360 there's not it's not really swinging either direction. You know, 0:12:55.600 --> 0:12:58.240 we were enjoying getting to know each other, and I 0:12:58.280 --> 0:13:00.520 think getting to know each other at like a friendship 0:13:00.600 --> 0:13:04.320 level is really good. And obviously there was like a 0:13:04.440 --> 0:13:07.200 chemistry in there, so there was flirting going on, So 0:13:07.280 --> 0:13:09.160 there was like a bit of romance, but a lot 0:13:09.160 --> 0:13:11.840 of friendship of just like the basic like getting to 0:13:11.880 --> 0:13:13.760 know each other, like where you're from, like what you 0:13:13.840 --> 0:13:17.720 look for. But I mean I was always aware that. 0:13:18.480 --> 0:13:21.200 I mean, we were very open and very had very 0:13:21.640 --> 0:13:25.040 mutual conversations that we like where things are going with 0:13:25.120 --> 0:13:28.040 each other on this beach so far, if someone else 0:13:28.040 --> 0:13:30.280 comes down, we're both open to exploring. So I think 0:13:30.320 --> 0:13:32.480 I always do in the back of my mind. He 0:13:32.720 --> 0:13:36.320 was open so and I was open, So I up 0:13:36.400 --> 0:13:41.200 until that point wasn't all in yet. 0:13:41.760 --> 0:13:45.080 Gosha, And that does give some context for your answer 0:13:45.320 --> 0:13:48.760 about So now we're at Truth or Dare and they 0:13:48.760 --> 0:13:51.000 ask you if Blake's your number one and you kind 0:13:51.040 --> 0:13:54.440 of answer it away. That makes it seem like you're, 0:13:54.480 --> 0:13:56.600 for the first time kind of being like I'm not 0:13:56.840 --> 0:13:59.240 like this is us as viewers getting the first inkling 0:13:59.280 --> 0:14:01.679 of like, oh, they're not locked in on each other 0:14:01.760 --> 0:14:03.800 because you say, yeah, he's my number one on this 0:14:03.920 --> 0:14:06.280 beach right now, which I feel like is kind of 0:14:06.320 --> 0:14:09.560 the same way that you just articulated where your relationship 0:14:09.640 --> 0:14:14.240 was at. Was Blake surprised by that or was that like, yeah, 0:14:14.280 --> 0:14:15.760 we were both on that same way? 0:14:15.960 --> 0:14:20.080 We also see him as viewers we see Blake, it 0:14:20.320 --> 0:14:22.960 seem like he's thrown off by her saying that, ye yes, 0:14:23.200 --> 0:14:23.800 so okay. 0:14:24.000 --> 0:14:26.040 So I guess my question is like, was he thrown 0:14:26.040 --> 0:14:28.040 off and were. 0:14:27.920 --> 0:14:28.760 You shocked that he was? 0:14:28.840 --> 0:14:31.080 If he I think maybe I was very oblivious in 0:14:31.120 --> 0:14:33.440 that moment, like I always try to be honest, and 0:14:33.480 --> 0:14:35.760 so when I got asked that question, watching it back, like, 0:14:35.960 --> 0:14:39.920 I completely agree my response the hesitation wasn't good. I 0:14:39.920 --> 0:14:43.160 don't even remember doing that in that moment. Everything I do, like, 0:14:43.200 --> 0:14:45.240 I try to do it in a very harmless way. 0:14:45.960 --> 0:14:48.000 I was very thrown off when he was upset. You 0:14:48.040 --> 0:14:50.840 see me when he pulls me for a conversation, I 0:14:50.880 --> 0:14:53.320 was like, what's up? Like I had no idea that 0:14:53.400 --> 0:14:58.040 he was upset, and that was like to me at 0:14:58.080 --> 0:15:00.800 the moment, I thought my answer would the same answer 0:15:00.800 --> 0:15:05.680 that he would have had to be honest, gotcha, is. 0:15:05.600 --> 0:15:09.600 There more that he could have been giving to you 0:15:10.840 --> 0:15:16.880 for you to be more committed to him or not 0:15:16.960 --> 0:15:18.760 be waiting for someone else to come on the people? 0:15:19.320 --> 0:15:22.400 That's a very hard question because there was more that 0:15:22.480 --> 0:15:25.800 I could have been doing too. It wasn't There's no 0:15:25.840 --> 0:15:28.160 one to blame for like where we were at that point. 0:15:29.000 --> 0:15:30.800 I think there was a lot of more romantic things 0:15:30.800 --> 0:15:33.800 that we could have done to make both of us 0:15:33.800 --> 0:15:39.240 feel confident in each other. And I think time is 0:15:39.280 --> 0:15:41.320 my biggest enemy on Paradise, and I think I was 0:15:41.360 --> 0:15:44.400 taking my time and I was I didn't really like, 0:15:44.800 --> 0:15:46.680 you don't realize how fast it goes by, and like 0:15:46.720 --> 0:15:49.000 how decisive you need to be, And I think my 0:15:49.120 --> 0:15:53.560 indecisiveness is what was the it was the issue. 0:15:55.960 --> 0:15:58.840 Okay, Yeah, we talk a lot about that how like, 0:15:59.400 --> 0:16:02.040 especially ice is such a short amount of time, and 0:16:02.080 --> 0:16:04.720 like it can be so out of people's comfort zones 0:16:04.760 --> 0:16:07.280 because you kind of have to like push that relationship 0:16:07.320 --> 0:16:10.360 forward constantly, and if you're someone that likes to take 0:16:10.400 --> 0:16:14.160 things slow, then it can feel like kind of like 0:16:14.200 --> 0:16:16.480 fish out of water of like, oh my gosh, I'm 0:16:16.520 --> 0:16:19.080 not ready to be at that stage where Eliza. 0:16:18.680 --> 0:16:22.600 And is outside of like in the real world, Like 0:16:22.680 --> 0:16:25.240 that's just how I am, Like I don't jump into things, 0:16:26.160 --> 0:16:28.760 and so I was doing exactly what I would do 0:16:28.960 --> 0:16:32.640 off camera, and that doesn't translate well when you have 0:16:32.760 --> 0:16:34.000 like a clock ticking. 0:16:34.240 --> 0:16:40.800 So yeah, totally okay. So we see Genevieve's Genevieve comes 0:16:40.840 --> 0:16:45.680 down and she asked Blake on a date? How does 0:16:45.680 --> 0:16:46.360 that make you feel? 0:16:47.040 --> 0:16:51.440 You know, at that point, I Blake and I were 0:16:52.360 --> 0:16:54.960 He was giving me space, and I just wanted him 0:16:54.960 --> 0:16:58.000 to be happy, and I wanted I wanted both of 0:16:58.080 --> 0:17:00.400 us to figure out what's going on, what's mis sing. 0:17:01.440 --> 0:17:03.920 I did not think that he would go on that date, 0:17:04.040 --> 0:17:06.359 just because, like you know, when you're being told like 0:17:06.400 --> 0:17:08.640 someone is closed off and they want to pursue you, 0:17:08.680 --> 0:17:12.000 like I just assumed, like, oh, he's not like interested 0:17:12.080 --> 0:17:13.840 in that, but he had every right to do that, 0:17:14.000 --> 0:17:15.640 just like I had every right to explore. 0:17:15.800 --> 0:17:17.760 So I think I was thrown off, but not in 0:17:17.960 --> 0:17:19.120 like an angry way. 0:17:19.160 --> 0:17:21.080 It was just like, oh, this is a twist that 0:17:21.160 --> 0:17:24.359 I did not see coming, and like he deserves to 0:17:24.400 --> 0:17:26.840 do that, like I can't, Like I can't just I 0:17:26.880 --> 0:17:28.679 can't want to do something and not let him do 0:17:28.760 --> 0:17:29.440 that either. 0:17:32.280 --> 0:17:35.399 Him giving you space and telling you I feel like 0:17:36.560 --> 0:17:40.320 you need space from me? Were you happy about that? 0:17:40.480 --> 0:17:41.880 Did you want space from him? 0:17:42.560 --> 0:17:44.240 You know, I didn't know. 0:17:44.920 --> 0:17:47.680 I really did not know what to do to make 0:17:47.760 --> 0:17:50.240 me like to make a click in my head, like 0:17:50.280 --> 0:17:52.280 are we the best match? Like I just needed to 0:17:52.280 --> 0:17:55.000 figure that out, Like is like Blake is great and 0:17:55.040 --> 0:17:58.040 he's every every girl, Like he's every girl would want 0:17:58.040 --> 0:17:59.919 a Blake, Like he has all these great qualities, but 0:18:00.080 --> 0:18:02.160 like is that something that fits in my life? 0:18:02.280 --> 0:18:03.160 Can I fit in his? 0:18:03.320 --> 0:18:05.199 Like? Are we the best match? So for me, Like, 0:18:05.280 --> 0:18:09.919 I didn't know the best approach to that. So you know, 0:18:10.000 --> 0:18:14.840 when he offered I respect his experience, I respect his maturity, 0:18:14.960 --> 0:18:18.960 So when he offered space, I trusted that that was 0:18:19.000 --> 0:18:21.240 the best approach for us In that moment. 0:18:23.800 --> 0:18:27.439 What were your hesitations with Blake, Because you say you're 0:18:27.480 --> 0:18:29.880 still trying to figure out if you're the best fit 0:18:29.920 --> 0:18:32.199 for each other. What was it that was kind of 0:18:32.800 --> 0:18:33.520 making you question? 0:18:33.880 --> 0:18:36.360 Was that moment like, you know, he we have such 0:18:36.440 --> 0:18:40.160 different lives outside of Paradise. You know, he's he travels 0:18:40.160 --> 0:18:42.639 a lot, he'll be live in different countries, like and 0:18:42.720 --> 0:18:45.119 you know, those are things that you can overcome. I 0:18:45.240 --> 0:18:48.199 just think I was very scared and I didn't want 0:18:48.240 --> 0:18:50.280 to leave in a public relationship just for it not 0:18:50.359 --> 0:18:52.400 to work. So I think for me, I was taking 0:18:52.440 --> 0:18:56.840 it as seriously as possible and being very logical and 0:18:56.920 --> 0:18:59.520 so I was having a lot of internal dialogues and 0:19:00.240 --> 0:19:02.560 myself out and that's where it went wrong. I probably 0:19:02.560 --> 0:19:06.040 should have communicated that a little bit more, and like 0:19:06.240 --> 0:19:07.880 I did that with my friends, I did that with 0:19:08.080 --> 0:19:10.120 you know, other people, but you don't really see that. 0:19:10.200 --> 0:19:13.280 But yeah, I think for me, it was just like 0:19:13.520 --> 0:19:16.240 can am I good enough to fit in his lifestyle? 0:19:16.680 --> 0:19:18.879 And like can we match where we're at in life? 0:19:21.960 --> 0:19:25.360 I feel like that's totally fair. Like I don't think 0:19:25.400 --> 0:19:29.119 you were really overthinking that necessarily, Like you're talking to 0:19:29.280 --> 0:19:33.320 like I'm from Canada and Joe's from US, so like 0:19:33.560 --> 0:19:36.720 as people that like had to overcome like the different countries, 0:19:36.800 --> 0:19:40.200 Like that is a huge just thing to consider if 0:19:40.200 --> 0:19:42.000