WEBVTT - Letting Go

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<v Speaker 1>Soundby listen.

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<v Speaker 2>There are only two guarantees in life. You will pay

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<v Speaker 2>taxes and you will die. Anything else that's not serving you,

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<v Speaker 2>you got to learn to let it go.

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<v Speaker 1>Period.

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<v Speaker 3>I like that, But what happens when you can't let go?

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<v Speaker 1>Like me with you?

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<v Speaker 3>Period? Baby.

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<v Speaker 2>It all started with real talk, unfiltered, honest and straight

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<v Speaker 2>from the heart. Since then, we've gone on to become

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<v Speaker 2>Webby award winning podcasters in New York Times bestselling authors.

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<v Speaker 4>Dead Ass was more than a podcast for us. It

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<v Speaker 4>was about our growth, a place where we could be vulnerable.

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<v Speaker 1>Be raw, or but most apportantly be us.

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<v Speaker 4>But as we know, life keeps evolving and so do we,

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<v Speaker 4>and through it all, one thing has never changed.

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<v Speaker 2>This is.

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<v Speaker 3>Because we got a lot to talk about.

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<v Speaker 1>So every time I'm gona talk to y'all.

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<v Speaker 2>By the time when I really had to let go,

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<v Speaker 2>hey remembers I came home and our whole world change.

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<v Speaker 1>It was two thousand and nineteen.

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<v Speaker 3>Wit a couple of moments like that, we we did,

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<v Speaker 3>but it.

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<v Speaker 2>Was twenty nineteen. It was January, brand new year coming in.

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<v Speaker 2>We had a lot of success with social media in

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<v Speaker 2>twenty eighteen, but I was feeling stagnant, right. And I

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<v Speaker 2>was in the gym with my year. My year was

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<v Speaker 2>the girls, the Ladies track coach when I had prototypes.

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<v Speaker 2>She was working with the ladies doing prototype and stuff,

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<v Speaker 2>and I was sitting there in the room and she

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<v Speaker 2>just came over with me. She put her hand on

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<v Speaker 2>my back and she was like you all right, bro?

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<v Speaker 2>And I was like, nah, not really. She's like, what's

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<v Speaker 2>the matter. And I was just like, I kind of

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<v Speaker 2>feel like I'm stuck and I want to move forward

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<v Speaker 2>so that I can better myself and my family.

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<v Speaker 1>And what we have doing.

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<v Speaker 2>And I feel like I can't do that because while

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<v Speaker 2>I'm here in Brooklyn, I can't leave Brooklyn. I have

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<v Speaker 2>too many things going on. She's like like what I said, Well,

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<v Speaker 2>I have the nonprofit at PS two seventy two. We

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<v Speaker 2>own the gym here, we own the basketball court. My

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<v Speaker 2>wife does make up and stuff like that. And she

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<v Speaker 2>looked at me and she was like the val sometimes

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<v Speaker 2>you got to learn to let go.

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<v Speaker 1>And I was like, what you mean.

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<v Speaker 2>She was just like, all those things that's holding you

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<v Speaker 2>back is literally holding you back. Like the only way

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<v Speaker 2>you can go to do what it is that you

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<v Speaker 2>really want to do is if you let go of

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<v Speaker 2>everything that's safe here? And I was like, what you mean?

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<v Speaker 2>She was just like doing the gym stuff here is

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<v Speaker 2>safe being here and using your brother as a crutch

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<v Speaker 2>and your family and your friends.

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<v Speaker 1>Why I can't leave?

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<v Speaker 2>Because how are all of these people going to function

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<v Speaker 2>if I leave? She's like, that's all safe, that's all.

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<v Speaker 2>You've giving yourself an excuse to not go and try

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<v Speaker 2>to do what you really want to do. You got

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<v Speaker 2>to let that go because if you let them go,

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<v Speaker 2>they'll be fine, but most importantly, you will be fine.

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<v Speaker 4>I don't know. That was just love her and now

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<v Speaker 4>I love her even the love her even more here

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<v Speaker 4>in that and that's probably what triggered that was January.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, we made the decision in April to move to La.

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<v Speaker 2>Made the decision in April, and then I ended up

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<v Speaker 2>booking sisters. Yeah, and we moved to LA and then

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<v Speaker 2>everything happened here.

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<v Speaker 3>We are here. We are the power of let and go.

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<v Speaker 3>I love that, all right.

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<v Speaker 2>Karaoka time karaoke time typically, y'all know, I seen karaoke.

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<v Speaker 4>That's not a mature I feel like it's always been

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<v Speaker 4>kind of like, go ahead, go ahead, lives.

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<v Speaker 3>It's been a mixture, y'all know, has it been fifty

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<v Speaker 3>to fifty?

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<v Speaker 5>It's pretty fifty to fifty it is.

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<v Speaker 2>So now you know what we're gonna do. You know

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<v Speaker 2>we're gonna do. We're gonna go back in time. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>and we're going to see all the time that you said, Babe,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm gonna let you do karaoke because that's your thing.

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<v Speaker 1>I can't carry a note.

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<v Speaker 4>I mean I can carry a note. But so far,

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<v Speaker 4>how many episodes we got that doesn't stop?

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<v Speaker 2>So we have fifteen in the season. Yes, I'm pretty

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<v Speaker 2>sure of the fifteen episodes. I do ten of the karaokes.

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<v Speaker 3>That's debatable. We'll see.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, you can go back and listen.

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<v Speaker 3>I love me and karaoke.

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<v Speaker 4>And does account if we do joint ones because sometimes

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<v Speaker 4>there's like a man and a woman, there's like you.

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<v Speaker 3>Know what I mean, it depends.

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<v Speaker 2>We can count on how many you did by yourself,

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<v Speaker 2>how many I did boself in trouble.

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<v Speaker 1>You're gonna tell us later. So the next episode we're

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<v Speaker 1>gonna have.

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<v Speaker 3>I love it. I love it well.

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<v Speaker 4>I was just thinking about songs, but let it go.

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<v Speaker 4>We did Elsa already. Yes, we're Frozen. Yes, so you

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<v Speaker 4>had a good one. But I like this one from

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<v Speaker 4>Mariah carry.

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<v Speaker 3>Even though I try, I can't let go.

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<v Speaker 6>Something in your eyes captured my soul, and every night

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<v Speaker 6>I see you in my dream, You're all I want.

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<v Speaker 1>I can good.

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<v Speaker 2>You actually do caraokee better than me? Because that was

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<v Speaker 2>actually really good. I felt very eighty eightish?

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<v Speaker 1>Did you? I think that song came out in eighty eight?

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<v Speaker 3>What was it that long ago? I don't know.

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<v Speaker 4>I grew up on Mariah my aunt Susie. I mean

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<v Speaker 4>when that Vision of Love album came out, it was

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<v Speaker 4>a rat. We had it on repeat about twelve.

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<v Speaker 1>That's your question. Yeah, Mariah Carey or Whitney Houston.

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<v Speaker 3>That's a good one.

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<v Speaker 1>Well that's the group when we come back.

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<v Speaker 3>Okay, like that one. I like that one. Stick around.

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<v Speaker 3>We'll be back. Okay, all right, we're back.

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<v Speaker 2>Well before we get to no, I have a question

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<v Speaker 2>for the group. If you had to choose who was

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<v Speaker 2>a bigger artist or who was your favorite? Would y'all

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<v Speaker 2>go with Mariah Carey or Whitney Houston.

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<v Speaker 7>Whitney Houston, Whitney Houston, Josh Witty Hoddy?

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<v Speaker 2>I know, people, I bet you don't know where that's from.

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<v Speaker 2>I know, I don't know.

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<v Speaker 5>You know, Martin, Yeah, everybody want hunting. I can't really choose.

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<v Speaker 5>I love Whitney Houston down. I miss her so much.

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<v Speaker 5>They took her, they did, and we need to do

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<v Speaker 5>an investigation into why. But I'm also a huge Mariah

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<v Speaker 5>Carrey fan. Every album, every piece. I love Glitter, Glitter,

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<v Speaker 5>Top five movies.

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<v Speaker 2>We got to look this up. Trouble who have more

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<v Speaker 2>number one hits? Her highest peak, who had the longest career?

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<v Speaker 5>Mariah has like the record for most number ones?

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<v Speaker 1>I think she does.

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<v Speaker 8>Yeah, she has like the most successful crazy.

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<v Speaker 3>She's as far as.

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<v Speaker 8>I think Whitney. Whitney speaks to my soul.

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<v Speaker 7>Riot sounds beautiful, right, she like, you can't.

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<v Speaker 3>Do that right?

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<v Speaker 7>But when he had you dancing in in CBS, they

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<v Speaker 7>played her and Dwayne Reed.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you think do you think Whitney had I mean

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<v Speaker 2>Mariah had more success because she could have that crossover

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<v Speaker 2>white audience, so that she had more success that way.

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<v Speaker 1>But Whitney Moore speaks to our soul.

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<v Speaker 2>She came from the church, like you think, That's why

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<v Speaker 2>to us she relates more yes and no.

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<v Speaker 9>Because I feel like Mariah came after her, so it helped,

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<v Speaker 9>like we already were Whenny already said the baseline.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, okay, some of it.

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<v Speaker 4>I think some of Mariah's crossover songs I didn't love

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<v Speaker 4>as much as like her first album or like those

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<v Speaker 4>first couple of albums. I think I liked older Mariah

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<v Speaker 4>versus Mariah that became a little bit more mainstream.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, that's fair. That fair.

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<v Speaker 3>Witney from me.

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<v Speaker 9>Looked at Mariah has nineteen hits and Whitney has eleven,

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<v Speaker 9>number one most of any solo artist history.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, if I had to choose, it would probably be Whitney,

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<v Speaker 2>mainly because my mother loves Whitney Houston.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I just think is a nostalgia around.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it's something about that felt more relatable to me.

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<v Speaker 1>You know church point the church one right.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 3>You hear her saying, oh, yeah, you know a service facts.

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<v Speaker 5>I don't know, all right, So I keep hearing about

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<v Speaker 5>Stephen A. Smith getting this one hundred million dollar deal

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<v Speaker 5>with ESPN, five year contract, twenty million dollars a year

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<v Speaker 5>oper No opp I know he's kind of a controversial personality.

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<v Speaker 5>So I'm wondering, do you think it's worth it? One

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<v Speaker 5>hundred million dollars.

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<v Speaker 2>I think I do have an opinion about this. I

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<v Speaker 2>think you are worth whatever money you generate. And if

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<v Speaker 2>I'm being one hundred percent honest, people only watch ESPN because.

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<v Speaker 1>Of Stephen A. Smith.

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<v Speaker 2>So get that man whatever money he deserved, because you know,

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<v Speaker 2>if they can give him a hundred million, they making billions.

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<v Speaker 1>So I hope Stephen they get paid. That's my opinion, Baby.

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<v Speaker 3>I love it.

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<v Speaker 4>I typically don't have an op if it's not within

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<v Speaker 4>my task bracket.

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<v Speaker 3>So but I will be yes, you will. We talk

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<v Speaker 3>about it here first. Yeah, I don't.

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<v Speaker 4>I don't watch ESPN enough, but I do respect what

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<v Speaker 4>he does Stephen Smith.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, and his his candor and his personality. Good for him, Bro,

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<v Speaker 3>do you think.

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<v Speaker 9>I think it's great because he's good for the bottom line?

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<v Speaker 9>So that man, mm hmm.

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<v Speaker 1>I can't.

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<v Speaker 8>I can't put a valuation on Stephen. I don't don't

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<v Speaker 8>know what.

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<v Speaker 7>I don't know what a hundred million dollars is, like,

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<v Speaker 7>I don't I don't know what that is. I could

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<v Speaker 7>be like he's fifty million. I don't know what to

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<v Speaker 7>see what you're saying.

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<v Speaker 2>But I mean, but let me ask though, if they're

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<v Speaker 2>willing to pay him a hundred million, it has to

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<v Speaker 2>know that they must be making more.

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<v Speaker 7>Oh yeah, definitely making money. Yeah, of course it's him

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<v Speaker 7>on that network for the company. He's definitely making more

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<v Speaker 7>than that. But I'm not hating on it, Like I

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<v Speaker 7>I love that he got it. But you know, I

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<v Speaker 7>can't say that I like him. That's the thing. I

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<v Speaker 7>think that's that's an issue with me. I can't see

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<v Speaker 7>it if I like him or not.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh so you're thinking of do I like him enough

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<v Speaker 2>to think that he's worth one hundred million?

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<v Speaker 8>Correct?

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<v Speaker 1>Copy. He's not your choice for content.

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<v Speaker 7>He's cool, has some valid takes, but overall he's like

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<v Speaker 7>hit him.

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<v Speaker 8>Miss for me.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, that's fair. Now, that's fair.

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<v Speaker 9>If you don't like a person to stick, you can

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<v Speaker 9>still feel like they're worth the money or not.

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<v Speaker 2>What he's saying is he don't think that he's He

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<v Speaker 2>don't think that he's valuable enough.

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<v Speaker 1>Like what he's saying out.

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<v Speaker 9>Here that that's the real reason.

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<v Speaker 2>Because Josh is a Knicks everybody, Josh is a diehard

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<v Speaker 2>Knicks fan, and Steven they do be having some wild

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<v Speaker 2>tak on the Knicks. After trying to act like he's

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<v Speaker 2>a Knicks fan. The minute they don't do something good,

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<v Speaker 2>then he just throws him under the bus. I do

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<v Speaker 2>feel you on that very disloyal, but I stand his

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<v Speaker 2>value to ESPN. I only turn on ESPN when that's

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<v Speaker 2>one I do. That's just I could care about.

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<v Speaker 1>The That's true.

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<v Speaker 7>I do watch the show, you know, but it's not

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<v Speaker 7>really for him. It's for the I like sports, so

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<v Speaker 7>you know that's what it is.

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<v Speaker 1>What you think.

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<v Speaker 5>I'm not even a real sports fan, but I know

0:11:08.320 --> 0:11:10.440
<v Speaker 5>who Steven A. Smith is and I know what his

0:11:10.520 --> 0:11:13.160
<v Speaker 5>personality is like, so I feel like that's worth at

0:11:13.240 --> 0:11:14.480
<v Speaker 5>least one hundred million dollars.

0:11:14.920 --> 0:11:17.480
<v Speaker 1>Talk about it, trouble get paid, bro.

0:11:17.640 --> 0:11:19.840
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, do you think brother man, open the door.

0:11:19.679 --> 0:11:24.840
<v Speaker 1>Because we're coming period. We're coming period next, I guess.

0:11:24.880 --> 0:11:28.920
<v Speaker 5>Since we're talking about money counting people's pockets, y'all know

0:11:28.960 --> 0:11:33.200
<v Speaker 5>about Tianna Taylor and Emon Shumpert's divorce. A lot of

0:11:33.200 --> 0:11:36.040
<v Speaker 5>information is going around about what they got in divorce

0:11:36.240 --> 0:11:40.960
<v Speaker 5>and how the proceedings win in Tianna Taylor is clapping

0:11:41.040 --> 0:11:45.760
<v Speaker 5>back now. She wants Emon Shumpert to be punished for

0:11:45.880 --> 0:11:49.240
<v Speaker 5>leaking settlement information to the public. She said that he

0:11:49.320 --> 0:11:53.680
<v Speaker 5>did it when she had something coming out, maybe music.

0:11:53.800 --> 0:11:55.680
<v Speaker 5>He had music coming out. So he's trying to push

0:11:55.679 --> 0:11:59.240
<v Speaker 5>his music by leaking what was in the divorce settlement,

0:11:59.360 --> 0:12:03.600
<v Speaker 5>and he lies about what she got and what she

0:12:03.760 --> 0:12:07.920
<v Speaker 5>owned apparently according to her, So she's missed. She's like,

0:12:08.200 --> 0:12:11.160
<v Speaker 5>he's causing me to lose. Oh, she had a Jordan

0:12:11.200 --> 0:12:14.480
<v Speaker 5>collaboration coming out with Nike when he leaked the information,

0:12:14.640 --> 0:12:18.240
<v Speaker 5>and so this information kind of overshadowed the news of

0:12:18.280 --> 0:12:21.840
<v Speaker 5>her Nike launch while he's trying to push his music.

0:12:22.920 --> 0:12:23.720
<v Speaker 1>Op or no op.

0:12:25.000 --> 0:12:26.840
<v Speaker 2>I'm gonna go back to what Matt said about this.

0:12:27.240 --> 0:12:29.560
<v Speaker 2>I stay out to marry people's business. But them two

0:12:29.640 --> 0:12:32.800
<v Speaker 2>been married for so long the details of that probably

0:12:32.840 --> 0:12:36.520
<v Speaker 2>go so far beyond that court document that I got

0:12:36.559 --> 0:12:37.200
<v Speaker 2>no hop on it.

0:12:37.320 --> 0:12:39.440
<v Speaker 1>I hope the best for both of them moving forward.

0:12:39.440 --> 0:12:40.280
<v Speaker 1>I got no op on it.

0:12:40.480 --> 0:12:43.040
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, no op for me either. I just it's too

0:12:43.120 --> 0:12:46.040
<v Speaker 4>much back and forth and confusion. It's like some of

0:12:46.080 --> 0:12:48.480
<v Speaker 4>this that's may be alleged, do we even know. It's

0:12:48.520 --> 0:12:50.920
<v Speaker 4>like listening to two sides of a story and then

0:12:50.960 --> 0:12:52.040
<v Speaker 4>there's a third, you know.

0:12:52.240 --> 0:12:53.800
<v Speaker 1>So I'm agreement with you on that.

0:12:53.880 --> 0:12:55.440
<v Speaker 3>I'm gonna sit this one out, y'all.

0:12:56.360 --> 0:12:56.880
<v Speaker 9>You already know.

0:12:57.040 --> 0:12:59.760
<v Speaker 8>No, I don't care, y'all.

0:13:02.040 --> 0:13:04.760
<v Speaker 5>I guess if I saw my bitch would move fast up.

0:13:09.920 --> 0:13:10.640
<v Speaker 8>That's what it was.

0:13:11.960 --> 0:13:13.720
<v Speaker 1>Yes, he saw a man.

0:13:14.280 --> 0:13:21.600
<v Speaker 3>Mom was like with.

0:13:21.559 --> 0:13:24.760
<v Speaker 1>The Hazel lies for you.

0:13:25.120 --> 0:13:27.679
<v Speaker 3>The documents, I forgot about that. I don't think the

0:13:28.240 --> 0:13:30.080
<v Speaker 3>street is some move faster move.

0:13:31.040 --> 0:13:32.480
<v Speaker 1>I don't have no op on them. I do have

0:13:32.480 --> 0:13:33.599
<v Speaker 1>an on that take on it.

0:13:34.400 --> 0:13:37.000
<v Speaker 2>I don't think Iman was thinking that because I mean,

0:13:37.720 --> 0:13:41.679
<v Speaker 2>if we're being real, right, Aaron Pierre is big and

0:13:41.679 --> 0:13:44.360
<v Speaker 2>tall to a lot of other people. But if you

0:13:44.360 --> 0:13:47.800
<v Speaker 2>saw him next to Emon Shepherd, Emon, she's a fucking giant,

0:13:48.040 --> 0:13:50.760
<v Speaker 2>is huge, and he's worth over like one hundred something

0:13:50.840 --> 0:13:54.640
<v Speaker 2>million dollars, I doubt that he's like jealous. You never know,

0:13:54.760 --> 0:13:56.640
<v Speaker 2>some some men be jealous for other reasons, you know

0:13:56.640 --> 0:13:59.240
<v Speaker 2>what I'm saying. But I just don't I don't see

0:13:59.280 --> 0:14:01.240
<v Speaker 2>that being a recent not Aaron Pierre being the reason

0:14:01.240 --> 0:14:04.160
<v Speaker 2>why he leaked the documents. What she said about his

0:14:04.280 --> 0:14:08.160
<v Speaker 2>music coming out, that's fucking genius. I mean, Kanye West

0:14:08.160 --> 0:14:10.760
<v Speaker 2>does everything like that, right, Oh, I got music coming out,

0:14:10.800 --> 0:14:11.760
<v Speaker 2>I got a sneaker coming out.

0:14:11.840 --> 0:14:13.160
<v Speaker 1>Let me just say something.

0:14:13.240 --> 0:14:15.600
<v Speaker 4>Does that really help though, Does it like help when

0:14:15.640 --> 0:14:16.760
<v Speaker 4>you think.

0:14:16.679 --> 0:14:20.000
<v Speaker 7>It starts the wheels turning toward the direction towards you. Yes,

0:14:20.080 --> 0:14:23.280
<v Speaker 7>like that's getting you. Now I'm doing something I'm in.

0:14:24.240 --> 0:14:27.000
<v Speaker 7>I'm spinning way longer than I should be because I

0:14:27.000 --> 0:14:28.320
<v Speaker 7>said something outlandish.

0:14:28.360 --> 0:14:30.320
<v Speaker 4>So it's not enough to just release whatever it is.

0:14:30.320 --> 0:14:32.400
<v Speaker 4>You got to put some kind of controversy around it.

0:14:32.480 --> 0:14:34.320
<v Speaker 2>Well, you don't got to put controversy, but it's just

0:14:34.400 --> 0:14:37.720
<v Speaker 2>it's clickbait, right Like, if you like it's trending, if

0:14:37.760 --> 0:14:40.080
<v Speaker 2>you go to X right now and you see what's trending,

0:14:40.120 --> 0:14:41.080
<v Speaker 2>it's going to be up there.

0:14:41.240 --> 0:14:42.840
<v Speaker 1>So then you go, why is this trending?

0:14:42.880 --> 0:14:44.680
<v Speaker 2>You research this person and you realize, Oh, they have

0:14:44.720 --> 0:14:46.960
<v Speaker 2>a sneaker collection coming out. Oh they have a thing

0:14:47.000 --> 0:14:49.520
<v Speaker 2>coming out. What's that about? That's really what it is.

0:14:49.640 --> 0:14:52.440
<v Speaker 2>I think I forgot. Who's the first person to say

0:14:52.480 --> 0:14:55.800
<v Speaker 2>there's no press is bad press? And that's what it's about.

0:14:55.840 --> 0:14:58.440
<v Speaker 2>If they're talking about you, then that means all of

0:14:58.440 --> 0:15:00.640
<v Speaker 2>the attention is going there and then so that's what

0:15:00.720 --> 0:15:05.000
<v Speaker 2>I could see. I listened when Tripple said that.

0:15:04.640 --> 0:15:06.560
<v Speaker 1>That caught me up. I didn't even know he had

0:15:06.640 --> 0:15:07.360
<v Speaker 1>music coming out.

0:15:07.800 --> 0:15:10.120
<v Speaker 5>No I didn't either. I thought he only wrapped that

0:15:10.200 --> 0:15:12.360
<v Speaker 5>one time on Taylor's song.

0:15:13.400 --> 0:15:15.960
<v Speaker 8>Music video come out this week or last week?

0:15:16.320 --> 0:15:18.040
<v Speaker 1>It did come out. He did have music, it was

0:15:18.040 --> 0:15:20.080
<v Speaker 1>a video come out.

0:15:21.960 --> 0:15:22.120
<v Speaker 3>Much.

0:15:22.160 --> 0:15:22.480
<v Speaker 7>I know.

0:15:23.920 --> 0:15:27.600
<v Speaker 1>You think of winning a fight Iman or No, we're

0:15:27.640 --> 0:15:36.440
<v Speaker 1>joking ya, We're not doing that realistically. Who you think

0:15:36.480 --> 0:15:38.640
<v Speaker 1>your money would be on realistically?

0:15:39.120 --> 0:15:39.760
<v Speaker 9>In Chicago.

0:15:40.000 --> 0:15:43.320
<v Speaker 2>I'm about to say, this is he from Chicago. Yes,

0:15:43.560 --> 0:15:47.040
<v Speaker 2>he's an Chicago like like like an athlete, and he's

0:15:47.040 --> 0:15:49.600
<v Speaker 2>been up against some of the most physically imposing people

0:15:49.920 --> 0:15:51.040
<v Speaker 2>in NBA history.

0:15:51.360 --> 0:15:53.480
<v Speaker 1>Like I'm not taking anybody over Emon.

0:15:53.680 --> 0:15:55.840
<v Speaker 8>He would have no problems against.

0:15:55.840 --> 0:16:01.640
<v Speaker 3>Ll fucked up at Elis ever after. We do not

0:16:01.680 --> 0:16:03.840
<v Speaker 3>condone any violence of any We don't.

0:16:03.840 --> 0:16:05.000
<v Speaker 1>We don't condone no violence.

0:16:05.200 --> 0:16:07.400
<v Speaker 2>But I'm playing I'm always very team light skin, right,

0:16:08.080 --> 0:16:09.720
<v Speaker 2>and then here's light skin pays a lot.

0:16:09.840 --> 0:16:11.080
<v Speaker 1>The nigga would get sucked up.

0:16:11.720 --> 0:16:14.320
<v Speaker 3>A bracket by himself. When you like skinning, you got

0:16:14.360 --> 0:16:15.320
<v Speaker 3>hatel eyes like you.

0:16:15.720 --> 0:16:19.000
<v Speaker 1>Here's Steph Curry. It's not there's only a few guys

0:16:19.040 --> 0:16:21.200
<v Speaker 1>like that, you know what I'm saying. So, but Ima

0:16:21.280 --> 0:16:25.600
<v Speaker 1>Shephard is what six seven like he's he's six he's yeah, six.

0:16:25.600 --> 0:16:29.600
<v Speaker 7>Seven, yell forward, shooting guard shot.

0:16:30.080 --> 0:16:31.760
<v Speaker 1>I think he's more for shooting. I think he's he's

0:16:31.760 --> 0:16:32.480
<v Speaker 1>bigger than six six.

0:16:32.560 --> 0:16:32.720
<v Speaker 8>Though.

0:16:33.120 --> 0:16:37.440
<v Speaker 5>It's so funny to me how men know like the

0:16:37.480 --> 0:16:41.640
<v Speaker 5>body stats of other men, like he's six seven, Like yeah,

0:16:41.880 --> 0:16:44.200
<v Speaker 5>what if I was like what Beyonce got like a

0:16:44.240 --> 0:16:44.680
<v Speaker 5>sea cup?

0:16:44.920 --> 0:16:46.520
<v Speaker 1>Like what'll.

0:16:50.120 --> 0:16:51.320
<v Speaker 8>Describing body parts?

0:16:51.360 --> 0:16:54.440
<v Speaker 7>We're talking about people that we've watched play basketball against

0:16:54.520 --> 0:16:56.000
<v Speaker 7>other tall people, so you don't watch.

0:16:57.960 --> 0:16:58.000
<v Speaker 1>Know.

0:16:58.120 --> 0:16:59.960
<v Speaker 2>The reason the reason why we would know something like

0:17:00.080 --> 0:17:02.560
<v Speaker 2>that is because it's like, wait a minute, Imman, Trump

0:17:02.720 --> 0:17:06.080
<v Speaker 2>got to guard Kobe. You know, Kobe sixty six, So

0:17:06.160 --> 0:17:08.040
<v Speaker 2>now did you find out he six five is like damn,

0:17:08.040 --> 0:17:10.400
<v Speaker 2>he was going Kobe in short, that's a big that's

0:17:10.400 --> 0:17:11.119
<v Speaker 2>a tall task.

0:17:11.520 --> 0:17:13.760
<v Speaker 3>So it's in relation to who they who.

0:17:13.720 --> 0:17:15.560
<v Speaker 1>Relations to the position.

0:17:16.359 --> 0:17:18.679
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, so we know that's why he says your shooting guards,

0:17:18.720 --> 0:17:20.720
<v Speaker 2>your forward. That's why we know the heights, Like I

0:17:20.720 --> 0:17:22.680
<v Speaker 2>don't be watching men walk by and be like he

0:17:22.720 --> 0:17:27.719
<v Speaker 2>look about six either take him? You know what, now,

0:17:27.760 --> 0:17:30.879
<v Speaker 2>we don't do that. If your athlete, we know y'all

0:17:30.880 --> 0:17:33.400
<v Speaker 2>do that. Though, look at her, that's a B B L.

0:17:35.880 --> 0:17:40.840
<v Speaker 1>With that t R B B L t R B

0:17:41.000 --> 0:17:41.399
<v Speaker 1>b L.

0:17:42.760 --> 0:17:46.639
<v Speaker 5>I'm about to change name Josh because that was Josh

0:17:47.560 --> 0:17:48.679
<v Speaker 5>t R I B b L E.

0:17:49.280 --> 0:17:51.200
<v Speaker 1>That's hilarious. So now we know trip we got a

0:17:51.240 --> 0:17:51.439
<v Speaker 1>B b.

0:17:51.520 --> 0:17:53.600
<v Speaker 5>L there in the name.

0:17:54.000 --> 0:17:57.640
<v Speaker 3>Listen, I'm starting rumors, look at you.

0:17:58.520 --> 0:18:04.439
<v Speaker 5>So next, what I'm my favorite people personality celebrities is

0:18:04.560 --> 0:18:07.920
<v Speaker 5>Jennifer Lewis. Jennifer Lewis my.

0:18:07.960 --> 0:18:08.840
<v Speaker 1>Aunt in my head.

0:18:09.440 --> 0:18:14.440
<v Speaker 5>I think everybody's she's like my bestie. Like, if she's listening, Jennifer,

0:18:14.480 --> 0:18:16.760
<v Speaker 5>I love you so much. But she had there's a

0:18:16.840 --> 0:18:18.520
<v Speaker 5>viral clip of her that's been going around for like

0:18:18.560 --> 0:18:21.320
<v Speaker 5>at least the last year, where she's on a radio

0:18:21.359 --> 0:18:25.040
<v Speaker 5>show talking about someone she dated and when she knew

0:18:25.080 --> 0:18:27.400
<v Speaker 5>it was time to kick him to the curb.

0:18:27.480 --> 0:18:28.240
<v Speaker 1>Have y'all seen it?

0:18:28.840 --> 0:18:29.520
<v Speaker 3>I don't think so.

0:18:29.680 --> 0:18:30.600
<v Speaker 1>You want to watch the video?

0:18:30.960 --> 0:18:34.760
<v Speaker 10>Yeah, here's the example of why I have to get

0:18:34.840 --> 0:18:36.960
<v Speaker 10>rid of him. We're driving on a car, driving on

0:18:37.000 --> 0:18:39.720
<v Speaker 10>Big Call, Life is great, and I come up on

0:18:39.800 --> 0:18:42.760
<v Speaker 10>an Australian tree that I know is extinct.

0:18:43.280 --> 0:18:44.440
<v Speaker 8>So we're driving and I go.

0:18:44.480 --> 0:18:46.480
<v Speaker 3>Oh, that's a pretty tree.

0:18:47.560 --> 0:18:51.800
<v Speaker 10>Him, you say that about every tree, And I was like, well, nigga,

0:18:51.920 --> 0:18:52.679
<v Speaker 10>you gotta go.

0:18:53.320 --> 0:18:53.920
<v Speaker 9>I'm Jonnifer.

0:18:57.760 --> 0:18:58.879
<v Speaker 1>I thought you was going to do it.

0:18:59.520 --> 0:19:02.320
<v Speaker 2>I thought you too, though, because you do Jennifer Lewis,

0:19:02.359 --> 0:19:04.200
<v Speaker 2>I thought she was going to do It's what happens,

0:19:04.240 --> 0:19:05.399
<v Speaker 2>a trible triple holding up?

0:19:05.680 --> 0:19:08.720
<v Speaker 1>Do you have an opinion on that? You have an

0:19:08.720 --> 0:19:09.320
<v Speaker 1>opinion on that?

0:19:09.480 --> 0:19:11.880
<v Speaker 3>I just love that she's happy. I love that she's

0:19:11.960 --> 0:19:13.200
<v Speaker 3>living life and she don't.

0:19:13.040 --> 0:19:16.960
<v Speaker 4>Let She is the classic epitome of unfunck withable and

0:19:17.040 --> 0:19:17.880
<v Speaker 4>I love that for her.

0:19:18.119 --> 0:19:19.960
<v Speaker 3>That is my opinion. I love that for her.

0:19:21.160 --> 0:19:23.040
<v Speaker 1>I agree with her. I have an opinion. I disagree

0:19:23.080 --> 0:19:23.520
<v Speaker 1>with her.

0:19:24.200 --> 0:19:29.320
<v Speaker 2>Just the other day, kids just hanging on the fridge upstairs,

0:19:29.400 --> 0:19:31.920
<v Speaker 2>your mother come in there, you bust your chin?

0:19:32.720 --> 0:19:34.960
<v Speaker 1>What the fuck? We got to be so negative? You

0:19:34.960 --> 0:19:35.520
<v Speaker 1>know what I'm saying?

0:19:35.720 --> 0:19:38.679
<v Speaker 2>Like the kids playing Why the first thing that go

0:19:38.720 --> 0:19:41.840
<v Speaker 2>to somebody mind is like you bust a chin? We outside,

0:19:42.520 --> 0:19:46.320
<v Speaker 2>kids playing basketball? Called then it's so fast you fall down?

0:19:47.480 --> 0:19:49.840
<v Speaker 2>Why does everything have to be so negative?

0:19:50.320 --> 0:19:50.520
<v Speaker 1>Right?

0:19:51.000 --> 0:19:53.880
<v Speaker 2>Can you imagine living with a person that everything you

0:19:53.960 --> 0:19:57.240
<v Speaker 2>do or say, they find a way to make it negative.

0:19:58.640 --> 0:19:59.320
<v Speaker 3>That's so heavy?

0:19:59.400 --> 0:19:59.880
<v Speaker 1>Could you? Ama?

0:20:00.000 --> 0:20:02.760
<v Speaker 2>I just that's a tree. You said about every tree?

0:20:05.960 --> 0:20:07.720
<v Speaker 2>I said that about you till you said that ship,

0:20:07.800 --> 0:20:10.240
<v Speaker 2>you know, Like that's how I felt like she wanted

0:20:10.280 --> 0:20:10.560
<v Speaker 2>to say.

0:20:10.560 --> 0:20:11.119
<v Speaker 1>And I get that.

0:20:11.200 --> 0:20:14.720
<v Speaker 2>Don't take away my joy and happiness for loving stuff.

0:20:15.040 --> 0:20:17.480
<v Speaker 2>Don't always feel like you got to point out something

0:20:17.480 --> 0:20:18.800
<v Speaker 2>that I know what I'll be doing.

0:20:19.160 --> 0:20:20.639
<v Speaker 1>I feel man, let that nigga go.

0:20:21.160 --> 0:20:23.760
<v Speaker 2>I'da let him go to right there, right out the door,

0:20:23.800 --> 0:20:27.000
<v Speaker 2>because I know that was her car. I'm pretty sure

0:20:27.040 --> 0:20:27.560
<v Speaker 2>that was her car.

0:20:27.800 --> 0:20:29.400
<v Speaker 4>She said, she got the car, she got the house,

0:20:29.400 --> 0:20:32.760
<v Speaker 4>she got all the things, and she probably said pull over.

0:20:34.240 --> 0:20:36.600
<v Speaker 1>And he said, why go stand by that tree.

0:20:36.640 --> 0:20:39.959
<v Speaker 2>I'm gonna show you why I love it.

0:20:40.200 --> 0:20:41.320
<v Speaker 1>Jennifer Lewis out.

0:20:42.720 --> 0:20:43.480
<v Speaker 3>I love it.

0:20:43.600 --> 0:20:47.240
<v Speaker 1>I love it. Let negative niggas go, Matt, she.

0:20:47.240 --> 0:20:50.800
<v Speaker 9>Knows what she needs for her life. I'm all for it.

0:20:51.000 --> 0:20:53.440
<v Speaker 8>Wow, I agree. I ain't got nothing to add on that.

0:20:54.680 --> 0:20:58.600
<v Speaker 5>I think, knowing part of her story, sometimes we do

0:20:59.040 --> 0:21:01.879
<v Speaker 5>the negative ship ourselves, you know what I'm saying. And

0:21:01.960 --> 0:21:04.800
<v Speaker 5>like she said, like when you've spent most of your

0:21:04.840 --> 0:21:08.560
<v Speaker 5>life in your own like darkness, when you get out

0:21:08.600 --> 0:21:10.760
<v Speaker 5>of that, if somebody tries to pull you back in,

0:21:10.920 --> 0:21:12.439
<v Speaker 5>it feels like a personal attack.

0:21:12.640 --> 0:21:17.000
<v Speaker 3>She dealt with depression right yeah, right, right.

0:21:16.880 --> 0:21:20.160
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, So you can't even you can't even let anybody

0:21:20.200 --> 0:21:23.080
<v Speaker 5>convince you that it's okay for you to be in

0:21:23.119 --> 0:21:26.440
<v Speaker 5>that darkness anymore. How that feels like it's that can

0:21:26.440 --> 0:21:28.320
<v Speaker 5>feel urgent to you with somebody.

0:21:28.119 --> 0:21:29.280
<v Speaker 3>Just yeah, you know.

0:21:29.400 --> 0:21:31.800
<v Speaker 4>I mean, there's a power and strength in that in itself.

0:21:31.920 --> 0:21:34.679
<v Speaker 4>Not allowing somebody to pull you back into that space.

0:21:35.440 --> 0:21:36.520
<v Speaker 3>That's crazy, well.

0:21:36.359 --> 0:21:38.600
<v Speaker 2>I mean, and that that goes into what we're talking

0:21:38.600 --> 0:21:41.000
<v Speaker 2>about today, right, like learning when to let go because

0:21:41.040 --> 0:21:43.600
<v Speaker 2>something don't serve you no more. Right in that moment,

0:21:43.720 --> 0:21:46.480
<v Speaker 2>Jennifer was like, I got the house, I got the car,

0:21:46.560 --> 0:21:48.879
<v Speaker 2>I got the perfect man. I got this and it

0:21:48.960 --> 0:21:52.720
<v Speaker 2>looks perfect to everyone else, including to you, but it

0:21:52.800 --> 0:21:55.639
<v Speaker 2>don't feel perfect. A lot of times people hold on

0:21:55.720 --> 0:21:58.119
<v Speaker 2>to things because it looks perfect to other people.

0:21:58.840 --> 0:22:00.880
<v Speaker 1>And in that moment, she chose herself.

0:22:01.240 --> 0:22:03.240
<v Speaker 2>So I rock well, And I think that's what a

0:22:03.280 --> 0:22:06.800
<v Speaker 2>lot of us need to do, not just with significant others,

0:22:07.680 --> 0:22:10.359
<v Speaker 2>but with career choices. That's why I told the story.

0:22:10.400 --> 0:22:14.159
<v Speaker 2>I told right, the gym was no longer serving me

0:22:14.200 --> 0:22:15.919
<v Speaker 2>in the way I needed it to. It was safe,

0:22:16.040 --> 0:22:19.439
<v Speaker 2>we were making good money, but I wasn't happy. But

0:22:19.680 --> 0:22:22.360
<v Speaker 2>to everybody else, it looked like the perfect way to

0:22:22.600 --> 0:22:24.720
<v Speaker 2>stay safe, keep my family good, and do everything. But

0:22:24.720 --> 0:22:26.920
<v Speaker 2>I just make me feel happy. So I let it

0:22:26.960 --> 0:22:29.080
<v Speaker 2>go and moved on, and it greater came because of that.

0:22:29.240 --> 0:22:29.560
<v Speaker 8>Yeah.

0:22:29.680 --> 0:22:31.520
<v Speaker 4>I think a lot of times too, we just develop

0:22:31.680 --> 0:22:34.280
<v Speaker 4>a level of comfort in that zone that we're in

0:22:34.440 --> 0:22:37.760
<v Speaker 4>because it's familiar, it's safe, it's secure, whether it's that

0:22:37.880 --> 0:22:40.840
<v Speaker 4>job that you know bi weekly that direct deposit's going

0:22:40.920 --> 0:22:44.600
<v Speaker 4>to hit, you know, knowing that you got the guaranteed clientele,

0:22:45.600 --> 0:22:48.080
<v Speaker 4>you have the family support nearby, you just kind of

0:22:48.320 --> 0:22:51.960
<v Speaker 4>succumb to a comfort that you don't want to disrupt.

0:22:52.880 --> 0:22:55.960
<v Speaker 3>So even us moving to LA was a huge deal

0:22:56.080 --> 0:22:56.480
<v Speaker 3>for us.

0:22:56.560 --> 0:22:58.720
<v Speaker 4>We moved with my mom just to at least some

0:22:58.960 --> 0:23:02.200
<v Speaker 4>have a portion of our you know, support system with us.

0:23:02.760 --> 0:23:05.560
<v Speaker 4>But it's just amazing how taking a little bit of

0:23:05.600 --> 0:23:10.680
<v Speaker 4>sacrifice just allowed everything to just blossom exponentially for us.

0:23:10.800 --> 0:23:11.640
<v Speaker 1>You know what's amazing.

0:23:13.080 --> 0:23:16.200
<v Speaker 2>Think about how often people sit in misery because they're

0:23:16.240 --> 0:23:21.160
<v Speaker 2>just comfortable being miserable. Now, think of us as black people, right,

0:23:21.840 --> 0:23:24.399
<v Speaker 2>we anybody in this generation was actually, I don't want

0:23:24.400 --> 0:23:27.440
<v Speaker 2>to say born into misery, but born into oppression, right,

0:23:27.760 --> 0:23:30.119
<v Speaker 2>So We're used to not having as much, right, especially

0:23:30.160 --> 0:23:32.199
<v Speaker 2>if you're a black woman. Right, It's just like I'm

0:23:32.240 --> 0:23:34.040
<v Speaker 2>a black woman, bottom of a totem pole. Right, Oh,

0:23:34.040 --> 0:23:36.520
<v Speaker 2>I'm a black man. No one really cares. So often

0:23:36.560 --> 0:23:39.399
<v Speaker 2>we get used to dealing with the least that we

0:23:39.520 --> 0:23:42.040
<v Speaker 2>accept it. And I want to start pushing people to

0:23:42.080 --> 0:23:46.199
<v Speaker 2>stop accepting misery because it's comfortable because you know it.

0:23:47.040 --> 0:23:49.080
<v Speaker 2>You know, not because it's comfortable, it's just because I

0:23:49.119 --> 0:23:50.800
<v Speaker 2>know it. Like, Hey, I'm gonna go to this job.

0:23:50.840 --> 0:23:51.520
<v Speaker 2>I hate this job.

0:23:51.520 --> 0:23:53.640
<v Speaker 1>I'm go tore every day. Oh I hate this man,

0:23:53.760 --> 0:23:55.200
<v Speaker 1>this man here, but I know I'm gonna go with

0:23:55.240 --> 0:23:55.840
<v Speaker 1>every single day.

0:23:55.880 --> 0:23:57.600
<v Speaker 2>You know what I'm saying, I'm gonna eat this food

0:23:57.640 --> 0:23:59.679
<v Speaker 2>and I'm gonna take my diabetes medicine even though I

0:23:59.680 --> 0:24:01.320
<v Speaker 2>know it's good for me, just because I know what

0:24:01.400 --> 0:24:06.040
<v Speaker 2>it is. Be uncomfortable, stop eating the disgusting food and

0:24:06.080 --> 0:24:08.640
<v Speaker 2>try to change your lifestyle. Leave the job, do something else,

0:24:08.720 --> 0:24:11.240
<v Speaker 2>leave that God, leave that woman, and find someone that

0:24:11.280 --> 0:24:13.280
<v Speaker 2>helps you, because that's the only way you can actually

0:24:13.280 --> 0:24:15.960
<v Speaker 2>get used to moving out of the comfort zone of misery.

0:24:16.160 --> 0:24:18.760
<v Speaker 3>Right. And you know it's funny, I feel like we're

0:24:18.760 --> 0:24:19.560
<v Speaker 3>at this age now.

0:24:19.560 --> 0:24:21.200
<v Speaker 4>I was just talking to a friend of mine recently

0:24:21.640 --> 0:24:24.520
<v Speaker 4>and just touching based on life, and it was just like, man,

0:24:25.119 --> 0:24:27.960
<v Speaker 4>such and such as you know, separated, such this person,

0:24:28.040 --> 0:24:30.639
<v Speaker 4>this couple we know, get a divorce somebody else, And

0:24:30.680 --> 0:24:34.200
<v Speaker 4>I'm like, are we just at the age where things

0:24:34.240 --> 0:24:36.760
<v Speaker 4>start to fall apart? Or is it that we're at

0:24:36.760 --> 0:24:40.480
<v Speaker 4>the age now where people start to realize or get

0:24:40.560 --> 0:24:43.760
<v Speaker 4>tired of their situations and say, you know what, I'm

0:24:43.760 --> 0:24:46.840
<v Speaker 4>going to have to call this relationship quit so or

0:24:46.960 --> 0:24:49.440
<v Speaker 4>I'm going to that's a good point I have. Yeah,

0:24:49.520 --> 0:24:52.000
<v Speaker 4>am I going to have to like terminate this this

0:24:52.240 --> 0:24:54.679
<v Speaker 4>you know, situation that I felt like was going to

0:24:54.720 --> 0:24:57.000
<v Speaker 4>be forever? But it's not like at what point do

0:24:57.080 --> 0:25:02.440
<v Speaker 4>people finally reach their max in those kind of miserable situations.

0:25:02.520 --> 0:25:06.840
<v Speaker 2>So the good thing is Matt is early thirties, Trible

0:25:06.960 --> 0:25:09.720
<v Speaker 2>is mid thirties, Josh, I hope you don't mind me

0:25:09.760 --> 0:25:12.359
<v Speaker 2>saying that, trouble and Josh is old and he's forty

0:25:12.400 --> 0:25:15.679
<v Speaker 2>like us. Did y'all notice that around thirties mid thirties

0:25:15.720 --> 0:25:19.040
<v Speaker 2>your friends started to change and started to be more

0:25:19.119 --> 0:25:21.280
<v Speaker 2>like Jennifer Lewis and being more like, man, fuck this

0:25:22.080 --> 0:25:24.240
<v Speaker 2>I noticed that when I turned my mid thirties, a

0:25:24.280 --> 0:25:25.760
<v Speaker 2>lot of my friends was like, fuck, I'm not just

0:25:25.800 --> 0:25:28.119
<v Speaker 2>doing that no more, like I'm just not And the

0:25:28.119 --> 0:25:31.000
<v Speaker 2>same thing with their relationships, getting divorced, leaving their jobs,

0:25:31.760 --> 0:25:33.240
<v Speaker 2>you know. And I think it's important that we do

0:25:33.280 --> 0:25:34.720
<v Speaker 2>that because when we sit in misery.

0:25:35.000 --> 0:25:38.400
<v Speaker 1>You know who we teach to sit in misery? Kid? Kids?

0:25:39.720 --> 0:25:44.000
<v Speaker 2>You know how many men sit in miserable relationships because like, man,

0:25:44.000 --> 0:25:46.080
<v Speaker 2>my father told me was gonna be like this man.

0:25:46.200 --> 0:25:47.679
<v Speaker 2>And I'm like, wait, man, wait me. Your father told

0:25:47.680 --> 0:25:49.760
<v Speaker 2>you're gonna be like what you know, being a man.

0:25:49.800 --> 0:25:51.280
<v Speaker 2>We gotta do this, and you gotta do this, and

0:25:51.320 --> 0:25:52.440
<v Speaker 2>just you know, she go and be there.

0:25:52.320 --> 0:25:55.399
<v Speaker 1>And I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa whoa.

0:25:55.560 --> 0:25:58.320
<v Speaker 2>You really just honestly believe that your life is meant

0:25:58.359 --> 0:26:02.240
<v Speaker 2>to be miserable because you got married and you married

0:26:02.640 --> 0:26:03.359
<v Speaker 2>that woman.

0:26:03.200 --> 0:26:04.080
<v Speaker 3>And that's what they said.

0:26:04.359 --> 0:26:04.960
<v Speaker 5>And the same.

0:26:04.760 --> 0:26:08.200
<v Speaker 2>Thing I got married, I got deal with this man.

0:26:08.240 --> 0:26:10.320
<v Speaker 2>It's like, y'all really think you're just supposed to be miserable.

0:26:11.200 --> 0:26:13.840
<v Speaker 2>People do because they watched their parents be miserable.

0:26:13.840 --> 0:26:15.639
<v Speaker 3>It's true. I know that I see that with like

0:26:15.720 --> 0:26:16.640
<v Speaker 3>our parents' generation.

0:26:16.920 --> 0:26:19.960
<v Speaker 4>Absolutely, there are so many people from our parents generation

0:26:20.040 --> 0:26:23.000
<v Speaker 4>that are just sitting around existing in misery, misery and

0:26:23.040 --> 0:26:25.000
<v Speaker 4>it's either there making the acceptance or as my father

0:26:25.040 --> 0:26:27.600
<v Speaker 4>would say, somebody put obi on him.

0:26:28.640 --> 0:26:30.200
<v Speaker 1>All of the Legit said. For people who don't know

0:26:30.240 --> 0:26:32.040
<v Speaker 1>what obia is, I know, the West then needs to

0:26:32.080 --> 0:26:33.480
<v Speaker 1>hear know, Yeah, like.

0:26:33.440 --> 0:26:36.280
<v Speaker 3>Voodoo, You're just like, you know what, this is above

0:26:36.320 --> 0:26:38.320
<v Speaker 3>me with obia and he won't put no work to

0:26:38.400 --> 0:26:39.320
<v Speaker 3>change it. But that's the thing.

0:26:39.400 --> 0:26:42.119
<v Speaker 4>And I'm like, what what action plans have you taken?

0:26:42.240 --> 0:26:45.119
<v Speaker 4>What what moves have you made? What steps have you

0:26:45.200 --> 0:26:48.280
<v Speaker 4>made to increase the level of happiness in your life

0:26:48.320 --> 0:26:51.480
<v Speaker 4>that you're responsible for nobody else facts? Or you just

0:26:51.520 --> 0:26:53.679
<v Speaker 4>wanted to succumb to feeling like, you know what, this

0:26:53.880 --> 0:26:56.920
<v Speaker 4>was just put on me to live this life of unhappiness.

0:26:57.119 --> 0:26:59.119
<v Speaker 1>Well, what steps did you do? Because I noticed you

0:26:59.200 --> 0:27:01.600
<v Speaker 1>lately that's how you got into a new career.

0:27:05.160 --> 0:27:06.760
<v Speaker 3>But you know, it's it's a little bit of both.

0:27:07.119 --> 0:27:10.080
<v Speaker 4>Okay, it was, and I'll talk about this more when

0:27:10.119 --> 0:27:12.920
<v Speaker 4>we finally unhatched that episode, But in part it was

0:27:12.960 --> 0:27:17.800
<v Speaker 4>a bit of stillness because I think the state that

0:27:17.840 --> 0:27:20.040
<v Speaker 4>I was in, particularly last year, where I felt like

0:27:20.119 --> 0:27:24.720
<v Speaker 4>we were just hustling to take every gig and to

0:27:24.840 --> 0:27:28.120
<v Speaker 4>be at every event, and to consider every job opportunity

0:27:28.160 --> 0:27:31.000
<v Speaker 4>and to be everywhere and do everything. After a while,

0:27:31.040 --> 0:27:33.520
<v Speaker 4>that got to be very taxing on me, and I

0:27:33.560 --> 0:27:36.520
<v Speaker 4>felt like, not that we were hustling backwards, or me

0:27:36.640 --> 0:27:39.160
<v Speaker 4>particularly with hustling backwards, but I felt like, I need

0:27:39.200 --> 0:27:42.200
<v Speaker 4>to be strategic about the steps that I take moving forward,

0:27:42.520 --> 0:27:44.800
<v Speaker 4>because if it's not going to move the goalposts in

0:27:44.840 --> 0:27:48.080
<v Speaker 4>the direction that I wanted to go professionally or family wise,

0:27:48.400 --> 0:27:51.280
<v Speaker 4>then what exactly am I doing just doing busy work?

0:27:51.400 --> 0:27:53.800
<v Speaker 1>So what point did you get to? Like that were

0:27:53.880 --> 0:27:54.800
<v Speaker 1>used like enough is enough?

0:27:56.240 --> 0:27:58.760
<v Speaker 4>It was October of last year where I felt completely

0:27:58.800 --> 0:28:02.600
<v Speaker 4>burnt out after I came back from Saint Vincent. That

0:28:02.680 --> 0:28:04.920
<v Speaker 4>trip that I took home to my dad's village as well,

0:28:05.000 --> 0:28:08.040
<v Speaker 4>really was impactful for me because it was an emotional

0:28:08.200 --> 0:28:10.040
<v Speaker 4>time for me, because I also got to see, like

0:28:10.080 --> 0:28:13.520
<v Speaker 4>where my dad came from and the very very humble

0:28:13.560 --> 0:28:16.800
<v Speaker 4>beginnings my grandmother, his mom, not knowing how to read

0:28:16.880 --> 0:28:19.280
<v Speaker 4>or write her entire life. And I'm like, man, if

0:28:19.320 --> 0:28:21.520
<v Speaker 4>my dad and my family made it up out of here,

0:28:22.040 --> 0:28:25.400
<v Speaker 4>and these are the opportunities I have now for myself.

0:28:26.119 --> 0:28:28.600
<v Speaker 4>Let me just be still for the rest of the

0:28:28.680 --> 0:28:32.200
<v Speaker 4>year and just really kind of listen to God, listen

0:28:32.280 --> 0:28:35.960
<v Speaker 4>to my heart, see what opportunities will arise if I'm

0:28:36.080 --> 0:28:37.159
<v Speaker 4>just still.

0:28:37.640 --> 0:28:42.240
<v Speaker 2>So okay, So, just to get this straight, at one point,

0:28:42.320 --> 0:28:44.160
<v Speaker 2>you sat in the misery of if I want to

0:28:44.200 --> 0:28:46.280
<v Speaker 2>get to a certain place in my career. The hustle

0:28:46.320 --> 0:28:47.960
<v Speaker 2>and buss was part of it, right, and you were

0:28:48.000 --> 0:28:48.920
<v Speaker 2>sitting in that misery.

0:28:48.960 --> 0:28:50.760
<v Speaker 1>We both were. We got hustled, we got.

0:28:50.720 --> 0:28:52.760
<v Speaker 3>To good misery.

0:28:52.680 --> 0:28:53.960
<v Speaker 1>Yes, I don't know if it.

0:28:54.000 --> 0:28:54.800
<v Speaker 3>Was misery misery.

0:28:55.760 --> 0:28:57.600
<v Speaker 1>I was miserable. You were miserable.

0:28:57.680 --> 0:28:58.920
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I guess, burnt out miserable.

0:28:59.000 --> 0:28:59.240
<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

0:28:59.280 --> 0:29:01.280
<v Speaker 1>Sometimes sometimes we have to learn, and this is a

0:29:01.280 --> 0:29:02.080
<v Speaker 1>good thing for people.

0:29:02.560 --> 0:29:04.600
<v Speaker 2>I learned to accept the words that come out when

0:29:04.640 --> 0:29:06.880
<v Speaker 2>I say it, even if it sounds bad, because that's

0:29:06.920 --> 0:29:08.120
<v Speaker 2>the word that first came to my mind.

0:29:08.160 --> 0:29:08.800
<v Speaker 1>That's what it was.

0:29:08.920 --> 0:29:10.800
<v Speaker 2>Just because it sounds bad when you say it, don't

0:29:10.840 --> 0:29:13.200
<v Speaker 2>try to change it. I remember those moments we were

0:29:13.200 --> 0:29:15.360
<v Speaker 2>getting ready to do a day with k Yeah, we

0:29:15.360 --> 0:29:17.360
<v Speaker 2>were planning a bunch of things at the same time,

0:29:17.840 --> 0:29:19.880
<v Speaker 2>and I remember waking up a couple of times and

0:29:19.880 --> 0:29:22.920
<v Speaker 2>feeling overwhelmed and looking at you and you looked miserable,

0:29:22.920 --> 0:29:24.040
<v Speaker 2>and I was like, yeah, what's the matter. You don't

0:29:24.040 --> 0:29:25.920
<v Speaker 2>seem excited, You're I know, I gotta know do what

0:29:25.960 --> 0:29:28.640
<v Speaker 2>I gotta do. Yeah, And it was after Saint Vincent

0:29:28.920 --> 0:29:30.560
<v Speaker 2>we did have a sense of calm.

0:29:30.600 --> 0:29:32.120
<v Speaker 3>I did. I did, Yeah, because you're right.

0:29:32.160 --> 0:29:33.440
<v Speaker 4>September it was when I was supposed to do a

0:29:33.480 --> 0:29:35.440
<v Speaker 4>day with k And it was also the pressure of

0:29:35.440 --> 0:29:37.680
<v Speaker 4>feeling like, Okay, we're coming off of the momentum of

0:29:38.120 --> 0:29:40.560
<v Speaker 4>the devusher can say toy that we did the Love

0:29:40.560 --> 0:29:43.200
<v Speaker 4>Against the World tour in February, we had done BT

0:29:43.400 --> 0:29:45.160
<v Speaker 4>experience in June July.

0:29:45.280 --> 0:29:46.760
<v Speaker 3>We had an awesome summer with the kids. There were

0:29:46.800 --> 0:29:48.080
<v Speaker 3>there so many really great.

0:29:47.880 --> 0:29:50.000
<v Speaker 4>Things happening that I'm like, okay, like while this has happened,

0:29:50.080 --> 0:29:51.160
<v Speaker 4>let's keep the ball rolling.

0:29:51.720 --> 0:29:54.120
<v Speaker 3>And then our schedules has got ridiculous.

0:29:54.480 --> 0:29:57.920
<v Speaker 4>We realized we were spread way too thin and you

0:29:57.960 --> 0:29:59.720
<v Speaker 4>had to go back to filming. I was going to

0:29:59.760 --> 0:30:01.800
<v Speaker 4>have a It was just too many things at once.

0:30:01.920 --> 0:30:05.800
<v Speaker 2>So I have a question for Trouble right, because I

0:30:05.840 --> 0:30:07.960
<v Speaker 2>know there are traumatic things that happen to people when

0:30:08.000 --> 0:30:09.640
<v Speaker 2>they finally say I've had enough.

0:30:09.720 --> 0:30:10.360
<v Speaker 1>Enough is enough?

0:30:11.760 --> 0:30:16.000
<v Speaker 2>There wasn't no traumatic, no moment. I know there's some

0:30:16.040 --> 0:30:18.560
<v Speaker 2>facts and stats about people when they decide. What are

0:30:18.600 --> 0:30:20.440
<v Speaker 2>they when they decide like now was enough for me?

0:30:20.520 --> 0:30:22.880
<v Speaker 2>Especially in relationships? What are the facts and stats?

0:30:23.200 --> 0:30:26.360
<v Speaker 5>Well, one of the stats I wanted to include came

0:30:26.400 --> 0:30:31.480
<v Speaker 5>from the National Domestic Violence Hotline because I think abusive

0:30:31.520 --> 0:30:35.560
<v Speaker 5>relationships are a really good example of how hard it

0:30:35.640 --> 0:30:37.080
<v Speaker 5>is to get out of the situation.

0:30:37.160 --> 0:30:39.080
<v Speaker 1>Yeah with me. The reason why I asked based on

0:30:39.120 --> 0:30:40.240
<v Speaker 1>what you said is right, go ahead.

0:30:40.360 --> 0:30:44.520
<v Speaker 5>So individuals and abusive relationships, it takes them around seven

0:30:44.600 --> 0:30:47.719
<v Speaker 5>attempts to leave before they permanently stay away.

0:30:49.560 --> 0:30:53.080
<v Speaker 2>So you heard what she said, seven attempts, Right, You

0:30:53.200 --> 0:30:56.640
<v Speaker 2>finally walked away this last October. I can guarantee you

0:30:56.680 --> 0:31:00.480
<v Speaker 2>there were more times of you feeling over whelmed and

0:31:00.560 --> 0:31:03.760
<v Speaker 2>feeling that it was finally that. And the reason why

0:31:03.880 --> 0:31:06.800
<v Speaker 2>I brought that up is because it wasn't like everything

0:31:06.880 --> 0:31:08.760
<v Speaker 2>was fine and this one opportunity came and it's like

0:31:08.760 --> 0:31:11.320
<v Speaker 2>it's overwhelming and you quit. You know, you felt like

0:31:11.480 --> 0:31:13.160
<v Speaker 2>we were just doing a lot for years.

0:31:13.400 --> 0:31:15.920
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, yeah, for a long time.

0:31:16.000 --> 0:31:16.200
<v Speaker 10>Yeah.

0:31:16.400 --> 0:31:19.760
<v Speaker 4>I get the correlation because it's not always related to

0:31:19.880 --> 0:31:21.120
<v Speaker 4>domestic violence, of course.

0:31:21.240 --> 0:31:24.080
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but the trauma you put on yourself sometimes is

0:31:24.120 --> 0:31:26.960
<v Speaker 2>more detrimental than the trauma someone else can put on.

0:31:26.920 --> 0:31:29.040
<v Speaker 4>You, absolutely, because then it's like, how can I show

0:31:29.120 --> 0:31:30.520
<v Speaker 4>up for you? And how can I show up for

0:31:30.560 --> 0:31:33.520
<v Speaker 4>the kids if I'm not at my best? You know?

0:31:33.960 --> 0:31:35.520
<v Speaker 3>So for me, that was that was it.

0:31:35.520 --> 0:31:38.040
<v Speaker 4>It took me actually literally having to clock out like

0:31:38.120 --> 0:31:41.640
<v Speaker 4>I after Saint Vincent. I was like, I'm done for

0:31:41.680 --> 0:31:43.760
<v Speaker 4>the rest of the year. I'm done, I'm done, And

0:31:43.800 --> 0:31:46.760
<v Speaker 4>I felt comfort. I felt such a relief in that.

0:31:47.280 --> 0:31:49.880
<v Speaker 4>And I literally when I was in Jamaica for the

0:31:49.880 --> 0:31:51.960
<v Speaker 4>New Year with you, I just kind of one morning

0:31:51.960 --> 0:31:53.800
<v Speaker 4>when I was praying and meditating, I was like, God,

0:31:53.840 --> 0:31:55.880
<v Speaker 4>I'm gonna just be still whatever you have for me.

0:31:55.880 --> 0:31:57.760
<v Speaker 4>In twenty twenty five, after having a call with our

0:31:57.800 --> 0:32:01.040
<v Speaker 4>new manager, Joe, I said, Joe, I'm not sure. And

0:32:01.480 --> 0:32:04.760
<v Speaker 4>that's the first time I actually felt okay, vocalizing that

0:32:04.840 --> 0:32:07.480
<v Speaker 4>I was not sure what was next for twenty twenty five.

0:32:08.360 --> 0:32:11.200
<v Speaker 3>And it's funny, the opportunities just came.

0:32:11.280 --> 0:32:13.280
<v Speaker 2>You brought that up because this is a conversation we

0:32:13.560 --> 0:32:15.160
<v Speaker 2>finally get to have it. But I didn't even have

0:32:15.200 --> 0:32:17.720
<v Speaker 2>it have it to have this with y'all with a

0:32:17.800 --> 0:32:20.640
<v Speaker 2>Day with K. I had pitched a Day with K

0:32:21.280 --> 0:32:25.840
<v Speaker 2>two K and to Joe in May. I think it

0:32:25.880 --> 0:32:28.680
<v Speaker 2>was May. Yeah, And the first thing Joe said was,

0:32:29.120 --> 0:32:30.760
<v Speaker 2>I don't think we have enough wrong way to do this.

0:32:31.920 --> 0:32:33.640
<v Speaker 2>And the first thing I said was like, I always

0:32:33.680 --> 0:32:36.120
<v Speaker 2>say we're gonna find a one way to do it.

0:32:36.200 --> 0:32:38.360
<v Speaker 3>Because we always do and we always do. Yeah.

0:32:38.440 --> 0:32:43.680
<v Speaker 2>And over the next three months, I watched Josh Matt Tribble,

0:32:44.040 --> 0:32:49.520
<v Speaker 2>Brian Jordan Jr. Yourself, myself and Joe try to do

0:32:49.680 --> 0:32:52.680
<v Speaker 2>everything right to make this thing.

0:32:52.560 --> 0:32:54.280
<v Speaker 1>Work the way we wanted.

0:32:53.960 --> 0:32:56.160
<v Speaker 3>It to work, right to our caliber.

0:32:56.320 --> 0:32:58.200
<v Speaker 2>And I do want to apologize to y'all because that's

0:32:58.200 --> 0:33:01.240
<v Speaker 2>a traumatic experience to put something on, to put your

0:33:01.320 --> 0:33:03.360
<v Speaker 2>name behind it and say, look, we got two months

0:33:04.120 --> 0:33:07.160
<v Speaker 2>figure it out. I think the reason wy I brought

0:33:07.160 --> 0:33:08.680
<v Speaker 2>that up too is traumatic for me to do that

0:33:08.720 --> 0:33:08.920
<v Speaker 2>to you.

0:33:09.200 --> 0:33:10.800
<v Speaker 1>And I think that that was it for you.

0:33:10.920 --> 0:33:14.200
<v Speaker 2>I think that was enough, was enough because it was like, devout,

0:33:14.360 --> 0:33:15.960
<v Speaker 2>you have all these things that you just want me

0:33:16.000 --> 0:33:17.600
<v Speaker 2>to do, but I'm the one who have to do all.

0:33:17.560 --> 0:33:18.120
<v Speaker 1>The work now.

0:33:18.600 --> 0:33:19.840
<v Speaker 2>And I was like, don't worry about you got it,

0:33:19.880 --> 0:33:21.520
<v Speaker 2>you got it, and I was throwing stuff and throwing

0:33:21.520 --> 0:33:23.560
<v Speaker 2>stuff and then throwing even Brian was just like dvo

0:33:24.680 --> 0:33:27.120
<v Speaker 2>like seriously, and I was just like, yeah, I think

0:33:27.560 --> 0:33:31.200
<v Speaker 2>that moment of just putting too much on top of

0:33:31.240 --> 0:33:32.720
<v Speaker 2>what we were doing is what kind of caused you

0:33:32.800 --> 0:33:34.360
<v Speaker 2>to be like, I gotta let this go, and I'm

0:33:34.360 --> 0:33:36.480
<v Speaker 2>gonna tell you how the truth. The minute we sat

0:33:36.520 --> 0:33:38.280
<v Speaker 2>down and say, yo, we're gonna have to push this off,

0:33:39.120 --> 0:33:41.640
<v Speaker 2>we both felt better. I didn't realize how much it

0:33:41.640 --> 0:33:44.120
<v Speaker 2>was gonna make me feel better because I got so used.

0:33:44.000 --> 0:33:46.760
<v Speaker 1>To just pushing sitting in the same misery.

0:33:48.920 --> 0:33:51.480
<v Speaker 4>I was bought into it too, because I was like, baby,

0:33:51.520 --> 0:33:52.760
<v Speaker 4>you told me that we was going to do a

0:33:52.840 --> 0:33:55.720
<v Speaker 4>dance routine, Love Love against the World.

0:33:55.760 --> 0:33:58.400
<v Speaker 3>We did a dance routine. Brian George Junia was like,

0:33:58.600 --> 0:34:00.000
<v Speaker 3>do you still think you could do it?

0:34:00.040 --> 0:34:00.360
<v Speaker 5>Split?

0:34:00.440 --> 0:34:02.640
<v Speaker 3>I said a split, Baby. I had nothing to split

0:34:02.680 --> 0:34:05.200
<v Speaker 3>since I was nineteen. You know, I do a couple

0:34:05.240 --> 0:34:07.280
<v Speaker 3>of tricks in bed, but I mean not to that caliber.

0:34:07.520 --> 0:34:09.680
<v Speaker 1>So I was like, list it.

0:34:11.360 --> 0:34:14.120
<v Speaker 4>So after doing that whole dance routine and getting my

0:34:14.200 --> 0:34:16.759
<v Speaker 4>split back and everything, and I was like, oh, yeah,

0:34:16.880 --> 0:34:19.160
<v Speaker 4>of course, I could do this, so it didn't feel

0:34:19.200 --> 0:34:21.080
<v Speaker 4>like you were putting any kind of pressure on me

0:34:21.160 --> 0:34:23.440
<v Speaker 4>at all. I was actually welcoming it because I was like, oh,

0:34:23.480 --> 0:34:24.719
<v Speaker 4>I could do this, this is what I want to

0:34:24.760 --> 0:34:28.800
<v Speaker 4>do anyway. You know, it's just logistically, it just was

0:34:28.840 --> 0:34:30.319
<v Speaker 4>starting to not make sense for us.

0:34:30.600 --> 0:34:32.799
<v Speaker 1>You know, I'm starting to realize that's the trauma be

0:34:32.800 --> 0:34:34.880
<v Speaker 1>putting on people. Josh.

0:34:34.880 --> 0:34:36.440
<v Speaker 2>How many times I've said stuff to you and you'd

0:34:36.480 --> 0:34:39.600
<v Speaker 2>be like, logistics like dividers don't make sense. And I'll

0:34:39.640 --> 0:34:42.799
<v Speaker 2>be like, I don't need it to make sense. I

0:34:42.840 --> 0:34:45.760
<v Speaker 2>need it to work, get it done, and Josh.

0:34:45.640 --> 0:34:48.719
<v Speaker 3>Be like, find a way. And we were going to

0:34:48.719 --> 0:34:49.120
<v Speaker 3>find a way.

0:34:49.160 --> 0:34:50.960
<v Speaker 4>But yeah, it was just one of those things that

0:34:50.960 --> 0:34:52.480
<v Speaker 4>I think in that moment, I needed to let go

0:34:52.560 --> 0:34:56.040
<v Speaker 4>of everything but my family and I literate. My conversation

0:34:56.160 --> 0:34:57.879
<v Speaker 4>with God was like, whatever you have for me, I'm

0:34:57.880 --> 0:34:59.360
<v Speaker 4>going to be still. If you need me to be

0:34:59.400 --> 0:35:01.560
<v Speaker 4>at home more because my children need me at home more,

0:35:01.880 --> 0:35:03.520
<v Speaker 4>I will be home. Or if my husband needs me

0:35:03.600 --> 0:35:06.560
<v Speaker 4>in some capacity to support him and whatever he has

0:35:06.640 --> 0:35:08.960
<v Speaker 4>going on, I'll be there to support him. If you

0:35:09.000 --> 0:35:11.040
<v Speaker 4>have something for me that you feel like will be

0:35:11.040 --> 0:35:11.920
<v Speaker 4>in my best interest.

0:35:12.239 --> 0:35:14.279
<v Speaker 3>I welcome it. And that was literally my prayer at

0:35:14.320 --> 0:35:15.359
<v Speaker 3>the end of twenty twenty four.

0:35:15.440 --> 0:35:17.200
<v Speaker 2>And look how that worked out. The minute you let

0:35:17.280 --> 0:35:19.160
<v Speaker 2>it go, right the minute you said I'm pretty much

0:35:19.239 --> 0:35:21.080
<v Speaker 2>let go and let God. Let go and let God,

0:35:21.160 --> 0:35:24.040
<v Speaker 2>that's when you had an even greater opportunity January sixth change,

0:35:24.040 --> 0:35:28.080
<v Speaker 2>which like funny because had we been doing the other opportunity,

0:35:28.560 --> 0:35:30.720
<v Speaker 2>you wouldn't have had an opportunity to do this opportunity.

0:35:30.760 --> 0:35:31.600
<v Speaker 1>And sometimes that's.

0:35:31.440 --> 0:35:33.240
<v Speaker 3>How the world works, that is how it works.

0:35:33.320 --> 0:35:35.759
<v Speaker 2>You have to let go in order to open your

0:35:35.800 --> 0:35:38.960
<v Speaker 2>hand to let another opportunity fall into it. And I

0:35:39.040 --> 0:35:42.399
<v Speaker 2>learned that from mister Tyler Perry. Mister Tyler Perry told

0:35:42.400 --> 0:35:44.879
<v Speaker 2>the story. No, Steve Harvey told the story.

0:35:44.680 --> 0:35:47.000
<v Speaker 3>And Tyler was holding a dollar or something like that.

0:35:47.080 --> 0:35:49.080
<v Speaker 1>No, it was the car. Oh, he had an old

0:35:49.080 --> 0:35:50.919
<v Speaker 1>car and he wanted a new car.

0:35:51.360 --> 0:35:53.399
<v Speaker 2>And his dad told him, as long as you keep

0:35:53.400 --> 0:35:56.279
<v Speaker 2>this old car and driveway, you never make space for

0:35:56.360 --> 0:35:59.239
<v Speaker 2>the new car. So he got rid of his old car,

0:35:59.800 --> 0:36:01.920
<v Speaker 2>and turning him getting rid of his old car, he

0:36:02.000 --> 0:36:05.359
<v Speaker 2>actually needed another car and put all the energy rather

0:36:05.440 --> 0:36:07.920
<v Speaker 2>than saving the old car, into getting a new one.

0:36:07.920 --> 0:36:09.759
<v Speaker 1>And he got it, and I got the message.

0:36:09.880 --> 0:36:12.560
<v Speaker 2>The message wasn't always about just removing something, but it

0:36:12.600 --> 0:36:14.720
<v Speaker 2>was letting something go so you can use the energy

0:36:14.760 --> 0:36:15.680
<v Speaker 2>you used to hold on.

0:36:15.640 --> 0:36:17.399
<v Speaker 1>To something to get what you really want.

0:36:17.640 --> 0:36:19.960
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, And to me, that's what letting go is in

0:36:20.000 --> 0:36:22.239
<v Speaker 2>any aspect, let go of something so you can go

0:36:22.239 --> 0:36:22.719
<v Speaker 2>go get what.

0:36:22.719 --> 0:36:23.239
<v Speaker 1>You really want.

0:36:23.280 --> 0:36:24.880
<v Speaker 4>It literally blows my mind to this day when I

0:36:24.920 --> 0:36:27.160
<v Speaker 4>think about it, because for the past what three four years,

0:36:27.160 --> 0:36:29.200
<v Speaker 4>two years, three years, we were on tour in February

0:36:29.239 --> 0:36:29.840
<v Speaker 4>every February.

0:36:29.880 --> 0:36:31.000
<v Speaker 1>We were every February.

0:36:31.000 --> 0:36:32.960
<v Speaker 3>We were doing shows since.

0:36:32.680 --> 0:36:35.840
<v Speaker 2>Twenty twenty And when I got that that twenty twenty.

0:36:35.680 --> 0:36:36.600
<v Speaker 3>One, yeah, exactly.

0:36:36.680 --> 0:36:38.719
<v Speaker 4>So when I get that phone call, it's like, hey,

0:36:39.000 --> 0:36:41.560
<v Speaker 4>what is your plan for twenty twenty five? And I

0:36:41.640 --> 0:36:43.480
<v Speaker 4>was like, well, you know, rebranding the podcast.

0:36:43.560 --> 0:36:44.959
<v Speaker 3>Imagine are you on tour? No?

0:36:45.320 --> 0:36:47.000
<v Speaker 1>Imagine if you had have said I'm gonna be on tour.

0:36:46.920 --> 0:36:48.960
<v Speaker 2>In February, can you imagine it would have been like, Oh,

0:36:48.960 --> 0:36:49.799
<v Speaker 2>I'll catch you next time.

0:36:49.840 --> 0:36:50.799
<v Speaker 3>I'll catch you next time.

0:36:51.000 --> 0:36:53.160
<v Speaker 2>And then what happens if there is no next time?

0:36:53.160 --> 0:36:54.920
<v Speaker 2>Because this opportunity was perfect for you?

0:36:55.120 --> 0:36:55.359
<v Speaker 5>Yeah?

0:36:55.960 --> 0:36:59.520
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, Oh, I'm in such a space of like in

0:36:59.600 --> 0:37:02.719
<v Speaker 4>sync attitude. I can't stop thinking about the way things

0:37:02.760 --> 0:37:05.399
<v Speaker 4>unfolded for me since the end of last year.

0:37:05.440 --> 0:37:07.000
<v Speaker 1>That's why you gotta let go sometimes.

0:37:07.200 --> 0:37:09.320
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, yeah, insane.

0:37:10.160 --> 0:37:11.960
<v Speaker 2>All right, this is what we're gonna do. Take a

0:37:12.040 --> 0:37:16.239
<v Speaker 2>quick break, get back to these listener letters. Okay, all right,

0:37:16.280 --> 0:37:17.839
<v Speaker 2>I think I got to listen a letter this time.

0:37:18.239 --> 0:37:18.879
<v Speaker 1>Let me make sure.

0:37:19.000 --> 0:37:21.600
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I got to listen to a letter this time. We're

0:37:21.600 --> 0:37:23.359
<v Speaker 2>gonna make take a quick break, come back into these

0:37:23.360 --> 0:37:24.080
<v Speaker 2>listening letters.

0:37:24.280 --> 0:37:25.560
<v Speaker 4>Sounds like I'm not. I was just making sure we

0:37:25.560 --> 0:37:27.600
<v Speaker 4>didn't miss anything. But yeah, I think we're good to go.

0:37:27.880 --> 0:37:30.720
<v Speaker 4>You okay, Ellis, Yeah, let go. Let go of these cars.

0:37:30.760 --> 0:37:32.480
<v Speaker 3>No, leave the cars alone. Because Triple worked hard on

0:37:32.520 --> 0:37:32.839
<v Speaker 3>the cards.

0:37:32.840 --> 0:37:35.440
<v Speaker 4>You know what I'm saying, there's trauma behind the cards

0:37:35.440 --> 0:37:37.359
<v Speaker 4>when it comes to Triuble, I'm holding on to them.

0:37:37.400 --> 0:37:38.959
<v Speaker 1>Okay, we'll be back.

0:37:39.080 --> 0:37:53.439
<v Speaker 3>We'll be back, y'all. All right, listening letter, I'm gonna

0:37:53.440 --> 0:37:53.719
<v Speaker 3>read it.

0:37:53.960 --> 0:37:55.560
<v Speaker 2>I got you, baby, you had the last one. Yes,

0:37:56.840 --> 0:37:59.360
<v Speaker 2>dear k Duval. First off, let me say, how's the family.

0:37:59.400 --> 0:38:03.200
<v Speaker 2>I hope everyone good? Yes, yes, everyone's great. We appreciate you. Okay,

0:38:03.239 --> 0:38:05.520
<v Speaker 2>So I listened to the episode the other day, nail

0:38:05.600 --> 0:38:08.000
<v Speaker 2>polish or nah, I gotta say I'm with the vowl

0:38:08.000 --> 0:38:09.839
<v Speaker 2>on this one. K you had some good points too,

0:38:09.920 --> 0:38:12.279
<v Speaker 2>Sorry girl, but I'm with the vow only because nail

0:38:12.280 --> 0:38:15.120
<v Speaker 2>polish is not made for boys or men. But if

0:38:15.160 --> 0:38:17.960
<v Speaker 2>it's for a good cause, then put it on cleats,

0:38:18.040 --> 0:38:21.640
<v Speaker 2>basketball shoes, jerseys, or even wear the color socks like

0:38:21.680 --> 0:38:24.239
<v Speaker 2>they wear the color pink or cancer for the month

0:38:24.239 --> 0:38:27.360
<v Speaker 2>of October. And I think Kaz is like me. I

0:38:27.440 --> 0:38:30.920
<v Speaker 2>never follow anyone or anyone's trends. I have never been

0:38:31.040 --> 0:38:33.799
<v Speaker 2>one to follow or care what anyone thinks. I'm my

0:38:33.880 --> 0:38:36.000
<v Speaker 2>own person I have my own personality for a reason.

0:38:36.000 --> 0:38:37.799
<v Speaker 2>But I don't mind your input or opinion from time

0:38:37.840 --> 0:38:41.200
<v Speaker 2>to time, and I will take in take it into consideration. Mainly,

0:38:41.239 --> 0:38:43.319
<v Speaker 2>it's gonna come down to what I think is best

0:38:43.360 --> 0:38:46.200
<v Speaker 2>for me. Sometimes I think like maybe I should take

0:38:46.280 --> 0:38:48.080
<v Speaker 2>other people's opinions into consideration.

0:38:48.280 --> 0:38:49.920
<v Speaker 1>I don't know what do you guys think.

0:38:50.200 --> 0:38:52.920
<v Speaker 2>Should I take other people's opinions and inputs into consideration

0:38:53.080 --> 0:38:55.440
<v Speaker 2>or should I stay the same ps. I need you

0:38:55.520 --> 0:38:58.239
<v Speaker 2>to come back with the live show in February so

0:38:58.320 --> 0:39:00.719
<v Speaker 2>I can finally meet you both first seeing you guys

0:39:00.760 --> 0:39:02.200
<v Speaker 2>on black Glove, I said to myself, I'm going to

0:39:02.239 --> 0:39:03.360
<v Speaker 2>meet them in person someday.

0:39:05.640 --> 0:39:06.880
<v Speaker 3>Existence I remember what my what was?

0:39:06.960 --> 0:39:09.960
<v Speaker 4>What was my my stance on the nail polish or not?

0:39:09.960 --> 0:39:10.440
<v Speaker 3>I don't remember.

0:39:10.840 --> 0:39:12.960
<v Speaker 1>I personally don't remember.

0:39:13.040 --> 0:39:16.480
<v Speaker 2>I do remember saying that my stance is that I

0:39:16.560 --> 0:39:21.720
<v Speaker 2>just don't wear nail polish.

0:39:18.200 --> 0:39:20.520
<v Speaker 1>Since something I don't want to do.

0:39:21.000 --> 0:39:23.600
<v Speaker 2>But if and this person was saying, if they wanted

0:39:23.640 --> 0:39:26.080
<v Speaker 2>to do it in solidarity, then something cool with that.

0:39:28.160 --> 0:39:31.120
<v Speaker 2>I did say, though, if it's for solidarity, I would

0:39:31.120 --> 0:39:32.040
<v Speaker 2>wear nails.

0:39:32.040 --> 0:39:33.720
<v Speaker 1>If it's just something that I think has a cause.

0:39:34.120 --> 0:39:37.680
<v Speaker 2>I personally don't think that just wearing nail polish makes

0:39:37.719 --> 0:39:39.879
<v Speaker 2>you anti manly, you know what I'm saying.

0:39:39.920 --> 0:39:41.080
<v Speaker 1>I just personally don't think that.

0:39:41.440 --> 0:39:43.440
<v Speaker 2>So say it's a cause like brust cancer wearing this

0:39:43.520 --> 0:39:45.479
<v Speaker 2>month and the kids in the clip I was talking about,

0:39:45.480 --> 0:39:48.760
<v Speaker 2>they all had the pink nail polish with the kid's

0:39:48.840 --> 0:39:51.359
<v Speaker 2>mom name on it because she had passed away.

0:39:52.080 --> 0:39:53.680
<v Speaker 1>I rock with that, like I would do that. I

0:39:53.719 --> 0:39:55.200
<v Speaker 1>don't think that makes you less of a man.

0:39:55.280 --> 0:39:57.680
<v Speaker 2>I think you were an agreement on that, But I

0:39:57.719 --> 0:40:00.160
<v Speaker 2>wouldn't just wear nail polish for any reason, and I

0:40:00.160 --> 0:40:02.839
<v Speaker 2>wouldn't let my kids wear it just because because they

0:40:03.200 --> 0:40:06.800
<v Speaker 2>their favorite athlete doing it. As far as her question

0:40:06.880 --> 0:40:09.640
<v Speaker 2>about taking other people's input into consideration, I think you

0:40:09.640 --> 0:40:13.319
<v Speaker 2>always should. And when you take other people's input into consideration,

0:40:13.360 --> 0:40:15.400
<v Speaker 2>all you're doing is getting a different perspective of the

0:40:15.440 --> 0:40:16.959
<v Speaker 2>same thing you look at, and.

0:40:16.880 --> 0:40:19.959
<v Speaker 1>You can always do more with more perspectives.

0:40:20.120 --> 0:40:22.160
<v Speaker 2>You know, when you limit yourself to one perspective, it

0:40:22.200 --> 0:40:24.520
<v Speaker 2>makes you close and now reminded, and you can't grow

0:40:24.560 --> 0:40:27.839
<v Speaker 2>that way. So taking their opinion into consideration doesn't mean

0:40:27.840 --> 0:40:30.080
<v Speaker 2>that you have to follow what they say. Yeah, so

0:40:30.160 --> 0:40:32.200
<v Speaker 2>you can take and listen and do I agree, Do

0:40:32.239 --> 0:40:36.040
<v Speaker 2>I not agree? Can I understand? Okay, I understand, and

0:40:36.080 --> 0:40:37.960
<v Speaker 2>then move forward what you want to do anyway, but

0:40:38.080 --> 0:40:39.520
<v Speaker 2>definitely take their.

0:40:39.360 --> 0:40:41.000
<v Speaker 3>Opinion into Yeah, I'm in agreement with that.

0:40:41.040 --> 0:40:42.480
<v Speaker 4>I mean, the fact that you listen to a podcast

0:40:42.560 --> 0:40:44.680
<v Speaker 4>is already showing that you probably a listening to people's

0:40:44.680 --> 0:40:47.680
<v Speaker 4>opinions about different things, and you never know. I never

0:40:47.719 --> 0:40:50.920
<v Speaker 4>profess to everything about anything, So if I can at

0:40:51.000 --> 0:40:54.600
<v Speaker 4>least learn something pull something from someone cool, but not

0:40:54.680 --> 0:40:56.760
<v Speaker 4>to the extent where I feel like I'm making decisions

0:40:56.760 --> 0:40:58.239
<v Speaker 4>for my life based off of someone else.

0:40:58.320 --> 0:40:59.560
<v Speaker 3>Like that's different.

0:41:00.040 --> 0:41:02.560
<v Speaker 4>Live a large portion of my life with that indoctrinated

0:41:02.600 --> 0:41:05.040
<v Speaker 4>into my head that I have to be concerned about

0:41:05.080 --> 0:41:07.560
<v Speaker 4>what other people are going to think if I were

0:41:07.600 --> 0:41:08.640
<v Speaker 4>to live in my truth.

0:41:08.920 --> 0:41:10.840
<v Speaker 3>As long as I'm not hurting nobody's feelings, I'm not

0:41:10.880 --> 0:41:11.640
<v Speaker 3>harming anybody.

0:41:11.680 --> 0:41:15.440
<v Speaker 4>I don't think see anything wrong with existing fully and

0:41:15.480 --> 0:41:17.000
<v Speaker 4>holy in what makes me happy.

0:41:17.080 --> 0:41:17.719
<v Speaker 1>I knew that.

0:41:18.200 --> 0:41:21.400
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, thanks for writing in And we might do another

0:41:21.400 --> 0:41:23.319
<v Speaker 4>live show. I'm just saying it may not be a

0:41:23.400 --> 0:41:27.239
<v Speaker 4>tour here we but Ellis ever after we might bring

0:41:27.239 --> 0:41:27.880
<v Speaker 4>it out along.

0:41:28.160 --> 0:41:28.680
<v Speaker 3>We'll see.

0:41:28.760 --> 0:41:30.239
<v Speaker 4>I'm warming up to the idea of it because I

0:41:30.280 --> 0:41:32.960
<v Speaker 4>was done. I was done with the live shows, Yeah,

0:41:33.040 --> 0:41:33.239
<v Speaker 4>I was.

0:41:33.719 --> 0:41:35.719
<v Speaker 3>I was done after Dead Ass because we thought maybe

0:41:35.760 --> 0:41:37.000
<v Speaker 3>Dead Ass was going to come to an end.

0:41:37.120 --> 0:41:39.080
<v Speaker 2>So I was done with the tours. I was never

0:41:39.120 --> 0:41:41.759
<v Speaker 2>done with the live shows for two reasons. Number one,

0:41:42.000 --> 0:41:44.440
<v Speaker 2>that's the best way that we can interact with our people,

0:41:44.880 --> 0:41:46.799
<v Speaker 2>you know what I'm saying. Also, to the energy you

0:41:46.840 --> 0:41:48.439
<v Speaker 2>get from being on stage, you don't want.

0:41:48.360 --> 0:41:51.040
<v Speaker 4>To I agree with that, saying it was for us

0:41:51.080 --> 0:41:53.680
<v Speaker 4>to like actually put on these shows and tour, but

0:41:53.719 --> 0:41:55.520
<v Speaker 4>like you said, if we do a live show in

0:41:55.600 --> 0:41:57.280
<v Speaker 4>Brooklyn or you know.

0:41:57.320 --> 0:41:59.160
<v Speaker 3>I was never done wanted to hear her.

0:42:00.200 --> 0:42:04.280
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I guess it's a difference hearing people scream.

0:42:04.600 --> 0:42:05.800
<v Speaker 3>Oh, it's my favorite.

0:42:06.080 --> 0:42:06.640
<v Speaker 1>There's nothing in.

0:42:08.360 --> 0:42:12.799
<v Speaker 2>Type of feeling watching yourself on television or in a

0:42:12.840 --> 0:42:13.920
<v Speaker 2>film that comes like.

0:42:13.920 --> 0:42:15.040
<v Speaker 1>Being on tour pause.

0:42:15.200 --> 0:42:16.879
<v Speaker 2>Completely agree, you know what I'm saying, Like you can

0:42:16.880 --> 0:42:19.359
<v Speaker 2>watch I watched myself on Netflix and I was like, wow,

0:42:19.360 --> 0:42:20.040
<v Speaker 2>I'm on Netflix.

0:42:20.040 --> 0:42:23.319
<v Speaker 3>I'd rather do live shows than this and podcasts. Yeah,

0:42:24.719 --> 0:42:26.479
<v Speaker 3>oh that's tough.

0:42:26.760 --> 0:42:30.399
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, which one if you have to pick one? Right? Yeah,

0:42:30.400 --> 0:42:31.279
<v Speaker 1>if I had.

0:42:31.160 --> 0:42:33.319
<v Speaker 4>To pick one, right, I mean, it's not realistic to

0:42:33.360 --> 0:42:35.799
<v Speaker 4>just do live shows all the time. But yeah, I

0:42:35.840 --> 0:42:38.000
<v Speaker 4>get why people love live shows. I love live shows

0:42:38.040 --> 0:42:41.760
<v Speaker 4>for that reason. It's probably my favorite part of podcasting altogether.

0:42:42.560 --> 0:42:45.279
<v Speaker 4>But but yeah, we'll see, we'll see.

0:42:45.960 --> 0:42:48.719
<v Speaker 3>All right. So are we don't listener letter?

0:42:48.800 --> 0:42:48.960
<v Speaker 8>Yeah?

0:42:49.000 --> 0:42:49.279
<v Speaker 3>We are.

0:42:49.520 --> 0:42:51.840
<v Speaker 4>Well, if you want to write in and be featured

0:42:51.880 --> 0:42:54.479
<v Speaker 4>as a listener letter, be sure to email us at

0:42:54.760 --> 0:42:57.760
<v Speaker 4>the Elisadvice at gmail dot com.

0:42:57.800 --> 0:43:00.880
<v Speaker 1>That's t h E E L L I A d

0:43:01.080 --> 0:43:05.520
<v Speaker 1>V I C A Gmail. That kind of I think.

0:43:08.280 --> 0:43:10.799
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, you're right, all right, moment of truth time. So

0:43:10.840 --> 0:43:14.520
<v Speaker 4>today we're talking about knowing when to let it go,

0:43:14.920 --> 0:43:20.279
<v Speaker 4>quit move on. You've had enough, whether it's that relationship, partnership,

0:43:20.640 --> 0:43:21.440
<v Speaker 4>that job.

0:43:22.239 --> 0:43:27.319
<v Speaker 2>You know very it's knowing when to let go so

0:43:27.360 --> 0:43:30.200
<v Speaker 2>you can receive what God has for you. Sometimes you

0:43:30.280 --> 0:43:33.520
<v Speaker 2>hold on to what you think is your purpose just

0:43:33.560 --> 0:43:36.759
<v Speaker 2>because it's comfortable, it feels familiar, and a lot of

0:43:36.760 --> 0:43:40.200
<v Speaker 2>times that familiar, comfortable feeling has you sitting in misery.

0:43:40.360 --> 0:43:42.080
<v Speaker 2>It's okay to let go of the misery and really

0:43:42.080 --> 0:43:43.800
<v Speaker 2>get what God has for you. So that's my moment

0:43:43.800 --> 0:43:45.719
<v Speaker 2>of truth. Man, let go what you think is comfortable

0:43:45.760 --> 0:43:46.840
<v Speaker 2>for what you know is better.

0:43:47.080 --> 0:43:51.560
<v Speaker 3>I love that mine was going to be. Change is good.

0:43:52.719 --> 0:43:57.320
<v Speaker 4>Change can be very good, And I think it's changed

0:43:57.360 --> 0:44:00.279
<v Speaker 4>when you are equipped, at least with a plan, when

0:44:00.320 --> 0:44:03.920
<v Speaker 4>you're equipped with the reason why you want to change

0:44:03.960 --> 0:44:08.719
<v Speaker 4>and shift. Change is uncomfortable, but I promise you on

0:44:08.800 --> 0:44:11.799
<v Speaker 4>the other end of change can be some really really

0:44:11.840 --> 0:44:15.800
<v Speaker 4>beautiful things. So, yeah, getting out of that comfort zone

0:44:16.120 --> 0:44:19.080
<v Speaker 4>can be the beginning of something so new for you.

0:44:19.680 --> 0:44:22.799
<v Speaker 4>I know for me, I was in a comfort zone,

0:44:23.000 --> 0:44:25.759
<v Speaker 4>you know, doing a lot of tandem things with you. Yeah,

0:44:26.440 --> 0:44:29.200
<v Speaker 4>things with the family comfort zone. My comfort zone was

0:44:29.280 --> 0:44:32.880
<v Speaker 4>like the podcast with my husband and my homies and whatnot.

0:44:33.560 --> 0:44:37.799
<v Speaker 4>And I was still and I embraced change. I was

0:44:37.880 --> 0:44:42.600
<v Speaker 4>open to something different. I was open to tapping into

0:44:42.640 --> 0:44:44.440
<v Speaker 4>something that I thought was lost.

0:44:44.520 --> 0:44:46.279
<v Speaker 1>Did you hesitate it all in me when you got

0:44:46.280 --> 0:44:47.600
<v Speaker 1>the phone call? Did you hesitate it all?

0:44:47.640 --> 0:44:47.719
<v Speaker 5>Like?

0:44:48.040 --> 0:44:49.200
<v Speaker 1>I don't know if I can do this.

0:44:49.600 --> 0:44:55.320
<v Speaker 4>Absolutely, self doubt, fear, imposter syndrome, all of that tried

0:44:55.360 --> 0:44:56.680
<v Speaker 4>to rear its ugly head.

0:44:58.080 --> 0:44:59.440
<v Speaker 3>I had to talk myself out of it a lot.

0:44:59.520 --> 0:45:01.600
<v Speaker 2>I just want to be clear that she's saying this.

0:45:02.080 --> 0:45:04.759
<v Speaker 2>We have a podcast, we've been on tour, she's done

0:45:04.760 --> 0:45:07.480
<v Speaker 2>live shows and all this stuff, and still and still

0:45:07.680 --> 0:45:09.520
<v Speaker 2>she felt self doubt. So if you're at home and

0:45:09.560 --> 0:45:12.640
<v Speaker 2>you're feeling self doubt, don't ask yourself.

0:45:12.200 --> 0:45:14.920
<v Speaker 1>Why am I the only one feeling this? We all

0:45:14.960 --> 0:45:15.359
<v Speaker 1>feel it.

0:45:15.920 --> 0:45:18.799
<v Speaker 2>Even the people you watch every day on television do

0:45:18.840 --> 0:45:21.359
<v Speaker 2>whatever they do, there's some doubt that creeps in. They're

0:45:21.400 --> 0:45:23.400
<v Speaker 2>just good at figuring out how to suppress it so

0:45:23.400 --> 0:45:25.759
<v Speaker 2>they can do what they have exactly a good job

0:45:26.040 --> 0:45:26.520
<v Speaker 2>doing that too.

0:45:26.640 --> 0:45:28.200
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, and I realized too, I was like, you know what,

0:45:28.239 --> 0:45:31.640
<v Speaker 4>God was not going to put this opportunity in front

0:45:31.640 --> 0:45:33.320
<v Speaker 4>of me, if he didn't feel like it was prepared

0:45:33.360 --> 0:45:33.640
<v Speaker 4>for it.

0:45:34.120 --> 0:45:34.760
<v Speaker 3>So I said.

0:45:35.719 --> 0:45:39.840
<v Speaker 4>My prayer after that was to just eradicate any feeling

0:45:40.040 --> 0:45:44.440
<v Speaker 4>of self doubt or fear or imposter syndrome, because everything

0:45:44.440 --> 0:45:46.759
<v Speaker 4>that I've done up to this point was preparing me

0:45:46.800 --> 0:45:49.279
<v Speaker 4>for this moment anyway. Like I went to school for this,

0:45:49.960 --> 0:45:52.200
<v Speaker 4>I've been doing this in small capacities. Yeah, I took

0:45:52.280 --> 0:45:54.440
<v Speaker 4>some time to have a couple of babies and you know,

0:45:54.520 --> 0:45:55.719
<v Speaker 4>pouring to my family, but.

0:45:55.800 --> 0:45:58.240
<v Speaker 1>Two couples, two couple of babies for before.

0:45:58.400 --> 0:46:03.360
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, you're right, but it's all things that I was

0:46:03.360 --> 0:46:05.920
<v Speaker 4>already equipped to do. It was it's who I am,

0:46:06.280 --> 0:46:10.600
<v Speaker 4>and I just needed a solid opportunity. So yeah, y'all,

0:46:10.800 --> 0:46:13.680
<v Speaker 4>change is good. Embrace it. Get out that comfort zone

0:46:13.680 --> 0:46:16.520
<v Speaker 4>because on the other side are very beautiful things.

0:46:16.920 --> 0:46:18.360
<v Speaker 1>Trouble what's your moment of truth?

0:46:19.040 --> 0:46:22.120
<v Speaker 5>Well, we didn't really have a round table discussion about this,

0:46:22.200 --> 0:46:23.759
<v Speaker 5>so I didn't get to tell my story.

0:46:23.480 --> 0:46:25.400
<v Speaker 3>About how round table is.

0:46:25.480 --> 0:46:29.960
<v Speaker 5>My first breakup sophomore year of college, I couldn't let

0:46:30.000 --> 0:46:33.800
<v Speaker 5>go and I got in trouble for stalking this girl.

0:46:34.200 --> 0:46:36.879
<v Speaker 5>No way I did, and that taught me a really

0:46:36.960 --> 0:46:40.080
<v Speaker 5>valuable lesson. If you don't let go, you can go

0:46:40.160 --> 0:46:47.239
<v Speaker 5>to jail. Literally, I mean that's pretty much the best

0:46:47.320 --> 0:46:48.640
<v Speaker 5>lesson you can learn.

0:46:48.560 --> 0:46:51.719
<v Speaker 3>Like actually let go. This is almost like.

0:46:53.440 --> 0:46:56.040
<v Speaker 1>You know, I learned if you don't let go and

0:46:56.200 --> 0:46:59.799
<v Speaker 1>go to jail, if you show up at people house,

0:47:00.200 --> 0:47:03.080
<v Speaker 1>they clothes, they might get upset. What what what did

0:47:03.120 --> 0:47:07.320
<v Speaker 1>you do that was so bad? I want to know everyone.

0:47:08.040 --> 0:47:12.000
<v Speaker 5>I would like send stuff to her job one time.

0:47:12.040 --> 0:47:14.719
<v Speaker 5>The worst thing I ever did was she had she

0:47:14.760 --> 0:47:17.000
<v Speaker 5>lived in an apartment that had it didn't have a key,

0:47:17.040 --> 0:47:19.480
<v Speaker 5>it had like a code to get in. So I

0:47:19.560 --> 0:47:22.120
<v Speaker 5>like went in her apartment and like slept in her

0:47:22.120 --> 0:47:24.719
<v Speaker 5>bed while she wasn't there, and then she came home.

0:47:27.200 --> 0:47:32.279
<v Speaker 5>It was so long ago.

0:47:30.280 --> 0:47:32.320
<v Speaker 8>Six months.

0:47:32.520 --> 0:47:33.200
<v Speaker 3>Ship story.

0:47:34.200 --> 0:47:35.160
<v Speaker 5>This is embarrassing.

0:47:35.239 --> 0:47:42.719
<v Speaker 1>But why can't you trying to throw this girl bed?

0:47:42.840 --> 0:47:46.319
<v Speaker 3>I'm just talking about moments that were expressing who.

0:47:48.080 --> 0:47:50.239
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, it's hard to let go, you have It's something

0:47:50.239 --> 0:47:51.640
<v Speaker 5>that you have to learn how to do. I don't

0:47:51.640 --> 0:47:56.000
<v Speaker 5>think anybody is. Maybe some people are naturally able to

0:47:56.040 --> 0:47:58.040
<v Speaker 5>do it, but it is something you have to learn

0:47:58.080 --> 0:47:59.879
<v Speaker 5>how to do, and it does take work. It does

0:48:00.000 --> 0:48:03.440
<v Speaker 5>take understanding that life is like a river, you know,

0:48:03.600 --> 0:48:06.600
<v Speaker 5>you can't stop it from flowing. It was your first love, Yeah,

0:48:06.600 --> 0:48:08.399
<v Speaker 5>it was my first relationship.

0:48:09.080 --> 0:48:10.720
<v Speaker 1>Was happening.

0:48:11.920 --> 0:48:14.280
<v Speaker 5>Well, he still lives in Ohio, he's married.

0:48:14.760 --> 0:48:19.560
<v Speaker 1>This is what happened. Now we know the origin story.

0:48:20.840 --> 0:48:23.440
<v Speaker 1>He transitioned, he pressed charges.

0:48:24.000 --> 0:48:24.440
<v Speaker 8>He didn't.

0:48:24.719 --> 0:48:28.000
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, he transitioned. When we dated, he was a man,

0:48:28.239 --> 0:48:28.920
<v Speaker 5>he was a girl.

0:48:29.160 --> 0:48:30.080
<v Speaker 1>Oh he was a girl.

0:48:30.239 --> 0:48:32.520
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, oh I thought you may he died.

0:48:32.600 --> 0:48:36.399
<v Speaker 1>I was about to say, what transitioned into another?

0:48:39.560 --> 0:48:40.440
<v Speaker 3>Passed away?

0:48:40.719 --> 0:48:43.920
<v Speaker 4>Oh no, okay, sorry, it.

0:48:46.640 --> 0:48:50.200
<v Speaker 5>Was a she and then she transitioned to be Yes.

0:48:50.960 --> 0:48:54.879
<v Speaker 5>So now he still lives in Ohio. We're but cool now,

0:48:55.080 --> 0:48:57.440
<v Speaker 5>you know. We talked from time to time. It was

0:48:57.440 --> 0:48:59.680
<v Speaker 5>a hard time in my life, but I did have

0:48:59.719 --> 0:49:02.880
<v Speaker 5>to go to therapy, and I.

0:49:02.239 --> 0:49:04.640
<v Speaker 2>Was it harder because I had to learn my transition

0:49:05.000 --> 0:49:06.400
<v Speaker 2>or no, no, no, no, no.

0:49:08.440 --> 0:49:12.320
<v Speaker 1>It was something you did. No no, ok yeah that

0:49:12.400 --> 0:49:14.439
<v Speaker 1>had none to do with you, no, nothing.

0:49:14.160 --> 0:49:17.960
<v Speaker 5>But yeah, I had to learn. Something that I learned

0:49:18.040 --> 0:49:22.680
<v Speaker 5>was mindfulness practice, like learning how to let thoughts and

0:49:22.719 --> 0:49:26.160
<v Speaker 5>feelings flow through you as they come. And it is

0:49:26.239 --> 0:49:28.680
<v Speaker 5>helpful with any decision you make, anything you have to

0:49:28.760 --> 0:49:31.399
<v Speaker 5>let go, anything you have to move on from It

0:49:31.440 --> 0:49:34.800
<v Speaker 5>is helpful to acknowledge your feelings and let them pass.

0:49:35.200 --> 0:49:37.120
<v Speaker 5>Don't hold on even though.

0:49:37.200 --> 0:49:41.080
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, acknowledge it and let it pass. Fel like I

0:49:41.120 --> 0:49:44.920
<v Speaker 4>was doing that more recently recently, Yeah, yeah, just like

0:49:44.960 --> 0:49:48.360
<v Speaker 4>allowing myself to feel what I feel and not shaming

0:49:48.400 --> 0:49:51.719
<v Speaker 4>myself or feeling what I feel, but then saying okay

0:49:51.880 --> 0:49:52.719
<v Speaker 4>and then it goes.

0:49:52.760 --> 0:49:55.200
<v Speaker 2>I feel like that's how we've got past arguing over

0:49:55.239 --> 0:49:58.680
<v Speaker 2>the past couple of years. Understanding that you feel a way,

0:49:58.760 --> 0:50:00.239
<v Speaker 2>and I understand that you feel the way, I'm a

0:50:00.280 --> 0:50:02.600
<v Speaker 2>let it flowing and let it pass, and also understand

0:50:02.600 --> 0:50:04.640
<v Speaker 2>that I feel a way now, I'm not always going

0:50:04.719 --> 0:50:06.560
<v Speaker 2>to feel that way, So you know what, let me

0:50:06.600 --> 0:50:07.319
<v Speaker 2>not make this.

0:50:07.280 --> 0:50:09.840
<v Speaker 1>Feeling be the rest of my day. You know what

0:50:09.880 --> 0:50:11.480
<v Speaker 1>I'm saying. That's let me need to be mindful. I

0:50:11.480 --> 0:50:13.000
<v Speaker 1>feel this way now, but we'll be later.

0:50:13.640 --> 0:50:14.520
<v Speaker 3>You know that makes sense.

0:50:14.680 --> 0:50:16.520
<v Speaker 1>Josh, you ever stalked anybody? I know you have.

0:50:20.880 --> 0:50:24.800
<v Speaker 8>Plead a fifth anybody.

0:50:25.960 --> 0:50:30.719
<v Speaker 7>But my moment of truth is quitting isn't weakness. It

0:50:30.800 --> 0:50:34.960
<v Speaker 7>is making room for a better you, a better job,

0:50:35.000 --> 0:50:38.799
<v Speaker 7>a better dream, not good than anything. Sometimes we look

0:50:38.800 --> 0:50:42.880
<v Speaker 7>at quitting as a failure to ourselves, to our dreams

0:50:43.000 --> 0:50:47.800
<v Speaker 7>or our goals. But quitting can be used as something

0:50:48.000 --> 0:50:54.799
<v Speaker 7>as a what's that thing when you spring cleaning, allowing

0:50:55.160 --> 0:51:00.840
<v Speaker 7>yourself to provide, allowing space in your life to for

0:51:00.880 --> 0:51:01.480
<v Speaker 7>a new chapter.

0:51:01.920 --> 0:51:04.600
<v Speaker 1>I get it. Don't look at this queens quitting that's what.

0:51:04.719 --> 0:51:09.040
<v Speaker 8>Don't look at quitting as a weakness. That's that's.

0:51:10.360 --> 0:51:14.040
<v Speaker 2>Don't let don't let letting go become quitting, which we

0:51:14.080 --> 0:51:15.120
<v Speaker 2>see as a weakness.

0:51:15.440 --> 0:51:19.920
<v Speaker 1>Then go there you there you go. I got you, Matt, I.

0:51:19.960 --> 0:51:24.479
<v Speaker 9>Say, trust your intuition. You know it's time for change. Yeah,

0:51:24.600 --> 0:51:26.840
<v Speaker 9>it may take time, but go towards and try to

0:51:26.840 --> 0:51:30.000
<v Speaker 9>make change. Trust yourself because if you feel it, it's

0:51:30.040 --> 0:51:30.520
<v Speaker 9>for a reason.

0:51:31.000 --> 0:51:34.359
<v Speaker 3>Yeah that gut, don't lie. The gut short, don't lie.

0:51:34.520 --> 0:51:39.640
<v Speaker 2>Pulls them guts, don't lie.

0:51:45.840 --> 0:51:47.520
<v Speaker 1>I was trying to rock with you, but these two

0:51:47.560 --> 0:51:53.239
<v Speaker 1>just jump that. I was going rock with you the weirdest.

0:51:53.640 --> 0:51:54.120
<v Speaker 8>Good morning.

0:51:55.320 --> 0:51:57.439
<v Speaker 3>Trust your gun, I got getting goods right.

0:51:58.960 --> 0:52:04.520
<v Speaker 2>What you know about getting you don't know nothing about.

0:52:03.360 --> 0:52:06.439
<v Speaker 1>That's yeah, yeah, that's true every day.

0:52:06.680 --> 0:52:10.319
<v Speaker 5>Sorry guts, so be sure to find us on These

0:52:10.320 --> 0:52:12.200
<v Speaker 5>conversations were going so far left.

0:52:13.719 --> 0:52:17.040
<v Speaker 3>We talk about heartfelt moments of change to guts. I

0:52:17.080 --> 0:52:17.880
<v Speaker 3>love it, yo.

0:52:18.040 --> 0:52:20.319
<v Speaker 2>Triple just made it seem like she was doing the

0:52:20.320 --> 0:52:22.400
<v Speaker 2>most calm thing and it just said, yeah, so sometimes

0:52:22.400 --> 0:52:24.080
<v Speaker 2>if you don't let go, you can end up in jail.

0:52:24.760 --> 0:52:26.680
<v Speaker 2>That's when it started going crazy because I didn't know

0:52:26.719 --> 0:52:28.399
<v Speaker 2>what it was going there, and I was like, what'd

0:52:28.400 --> 0:52:28.560
<v Speaker 2>you do?

0:52:28.640 --> 0:52:30.279
<v Speaker 1>Triple? I thought you could be like.

0:52:30.280 --> 0:52:32.120
<v Speaker 2>I was outside of her house and I was calling

0:52:32.120 --> 0:52:33.719
<v Speaker 2>her name. Yeah, I used the cold got in.

0:52:33.800 --> 0:52:36.759
<v Speaker 1>I was in her bed. She wasn't there. I was

0:52:36.880 --> 0:52:37.439
<v Speaker 1>in bed.

0:52:39.120 --> 0:52:40.960
<v Speaker 3>Tell her one more time? Is that what it is?

0:52:41.520 --> 0:52:42.560
<v Speaker 5>I don't know.

0:52:42.239 --> 0:52:43.080
<v Speaker 1>I wasn't.

0:52:43.320 --> 0:52:47.040
<v Speaker 5>I wasn't mentally you were young though, yeah, it was

0:52:47.080 --> 0:52:48.480
<v Speaker 5>like nineteen nineteen.

0:52:48.760 --> 0:52:49.640
<v Speaker 3>That was your first live.

0:52:50.040 --> 0:52:52.799
<v Speaker 2>About the Triple was in her bed with airport clothes on.

0:52:54.080 --> 0:52:56.719
<v Speaker 2>That's what drew the line right there. She walked in

0:52:56.800 --> 0:52:57.120
<v Speaker 2>there like.

0:52:59.280 --> 0:52:59.919
<v Speaker 1>Knock that out.

0:53:02.040 --> 0:53:03.200
<v Speaker 3>Couldn't have been a West Indian.

0:53:03.480 --> 0:53:07.959
<v Speaker 4>There's a file and then we're like, nah, everybody knows

0:53:08.000 --> 0:53:11.720
<v Speaker 4>that you do not sit on the bed outside clothes.

0:53:12.840 --> 0:53:13.359
<v Speaker 3>All right, y'all.

0:53:13.400 --> 0:53:15.319
<v Speaker 4>Be sure to find us on Patreon to see the

0:53:15.440 --> 0:53:19.840
<v Speaker 4>after show, as well as more exclusive Ellis Ever After content,

0:53:20.160 --> 0:53:22.600
<v Speaker 4>and you can find us on social media at ellis

0:53:22.600 --> 0:53:24.120
<v Speaker 4>ever After on Instagram.

0:53:24.600 --> 0:53:27.160
<v Speaker 3>I'm Kadeen, I am I'm Deval.

0:53:27.480 --> 0:53:30.239
<v Speaker 9>I'm at on the score matt dot Ellis. There's too

0:53:30.239 --> 0:53:31.200
<v Speaker 9>many Matt ellis Is in the world.

0:53:31.239 --> 0:53:34.799
<v Speaker 8>Sorry, Oh shoot, my bad.

0:53:34.840 --> 0:53:36.279
<v Speaker 1>This is me this guy.

0:53:37.800 --> 0:53:41.400
<v Speaker 8>And I am Josha Dwayne at j O s h

0:53:41.520 --> 0:53:43.719
<v Speaker 8>U A underscored d w A I N.

0:53:46.160 --> 0:53:48.719
<v Speaker 1>We got you. We're gonna put it. We're gonna know

0:53:48.760 --> 0:53:49.600
<v Speaker 1>what throws you to death.

0:53:50.320 --> 0:53:53.200
<v Speaker 5>And I'm at t R I B B L s Now.

0:54:01.560 --> 0:54:04.160
<v Speaker 1>We all knew it. We all knew it.

0:54:05.000 --> 0:54:07.960
<v Speaker 5>I'm at Trims, the Cool Trims, what is EVA cool?

0:54:08.880 --> 0:54:09.239
<v Speaker 1>That's right?

0:54:09.280 --> 0:54:11.640
<v Speaker 2>And if you listen on Apple podcasts, be sure to rate,

0:54:12.080 --> 0:54:17.080
<v Speaker 2>review and subscribe. And as always that ass that's right.

0:54:17.160 --> 0:54:19.240
<v Speaker 3>Y'all tell a friend Baby Ella's ever After.

0:54:19.640 --> 0:54:21.320
<v Speaker 1>We Got.

0:54:22.880 --> 0:54:26.799
<v Speaker 5>Ellis ever Aptor is an iHeartMedia podcast. It's hosted by

0:54:26.960 --> 0:54:31.840
<v Speaker 5>Kadeen and Deval Ellis. It's produced by Triple Video, production

0:54:32.000 --> 0:57:19.200
<v Speaker 5>by Joshua Dwyane and Matthew Ellis, video editing by Lashan Roe.

0:55:11.560 --> 0:56:07.240
<v Speaker 1>To Kona

0:56:11.760 --> 0:56:22.200
<v Speaker 3>Toga Toka