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Speaker 1: Talk. We're just too unapologetically black women with an opinion

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Speaker 1: who talked back? What's up y'all shoes. If you tuning

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Speaker 1: in for a new episode that we talked back, it's

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Speaker 1: your co host A J. Holiday. The show is dedicated

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Speaker 1: to you, niggas and these holes and everybody in between.

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Speaker 1: That would be me. Hey, y'all, I love y'all. This

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Speaker 1: is me Tim Van. Thank y'all for tuning in again. Hey,

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Speaker 1: hey j Girl, Hey girl. We had a time last night.

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Speaker 1: Then we even at the time this weekend, y'all. I know, man,

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Speaker 1: a real good time. Was we supposed to have that

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Speaker 1: good of a time? I don't know. I think that

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Speaker 1: was the whole plan. I think they wanted us to

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Speaker 1: have a good time. Me A J. And the h

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Speaker 1: B I C of Black Effect. We all went out

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Speaker 1: to We went to Memphis. We got invited to Memphis

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Speaker 1: by St. Jude's to participate in there's homecoming celebration. Um,

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Speaker 1: if you don't know what St. Jus is, it's hospital

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Speaker 1: and they helped with childhood cancer and we received a

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Speaker 1: lot of great information and they had a lot of

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Speaker 1: events for us to attend, and it was such a

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Speaker 1: good time. We had so much fun, and we got

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Speaker 1: to learn a lot about Memphis and about the hospital. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and it's like literally a home coming. So you had

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Speaker 1: people from different HBC used, he had all the Divine

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Speaker 1: nine in the building, ski Ween and all this good stuff.

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Speaker 1: It was really good and they invited. My favorite part

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Speaker 1: was the food. My favorite part was the actual uh,

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Speaker 1: the sneaker ball. I enjoyed the sneaker Ball. I had

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Speaker 1: a lot of fun. They had UM a singer named

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Speaker 1: Dough Jones. She came out and she performed, and she

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Speaker 1: is just phenomenal y'all. If you haven't heard her music,

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Speaker 1: she sees that song when I Pray. I really loved

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Speaker 1: that song. If I get married, I would really love

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Speaker 1: for Doe to come out and serenade me and my guests. Um.

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Speaker 1: Then they also had Eric Bellingery performed. It was a

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Speaker 1: list of people that came out and performed throughout the

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Speaker 1: weekend and it was a great time. Yeah. I ended

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Speaker 1: up on the shuttle with UH with Dope. I was like, girl,

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Speaker 1: Beyonce could fucking never do that? Beyonce, hold on beyond.

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Speaker 1: Let's this a whole debate. Yes, Beyonce is a great singer, right,

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Speaker 1: but let's be honest. Beyonce beyond Yes, she's a great performer,

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Speaker 1: and beyonce voice wasn't always what it is now, right,

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Speaker 1: she had to go through lessons. Now the real singer

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Speaker 1: to me is Kelly Rowland. But do baby, that girl

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Speaker 1: can She got some pipes, y'all. She was hitting them notes.

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Speaker 1: I was like, damn, just when I think I can

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Speaker 1: sing a little bit, I realized I can't sing worth it.

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Speaker 1: You ain never thought that I can't hold out that

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Speaker 1: I can hold a little note. So, um, somebody told

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Speaker 1: me not to tell y'all this, and y'all should tell

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Speaker 1: me if I should tell y'all. Are not, But I'm

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Speaker 1: about to tell y'all. So I was in the airport

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Speaker 1: coming back from Memphis, and I was at the bar

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Speaker 1: and the bartender treated me so bad, y'all. I mean,

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Speaker 1: I've never had anybody treat me so bad as far

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Speaker 1: as customer services concerned. The woman slammed the fries in

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Speaker 1: my face. I spilled my drink. She just left it there.

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Speaker 1: The Patriots had to give me napkins, and then she slammed,

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Speaker 1: um my ticket down on the counter for French fries.

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Speaker 1: That's all I ordered, And I didn't eat them because

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Speaker 1: she never came back to offer me catch up, honey, mustard,

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Speaker 1: a napkin, nothing the whole time. Barbecue, barbecue, sauce, not nothing.

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Speaker 1: She's just so rude to me because she felt like

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Speaker 1: I wasn't trying to spend a lot of money. It's

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Speaker 1: in the airport and I'm just sitting at the bar

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Speaker 1: in mind of my business. I'm not bothering. Do y'all

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Speaker 1: know this woman called the police on me. This woman

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Speaker 1: really called the police on me. I'm making a long

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Speaker 1: story short, but yeah, she called the police on me,

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Speaker 1: and the police had to tell her that, yeah, we

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Speaker 1: can't make her pay for food that she did not eat.

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Speaker 1: I mean, me and this woman was going back and

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Speaker 1: forth and I wanted to motherfucking Frisbee throw that fucking

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Speaker 1: bowl of fresh fries at that bitch. I sew the

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Speaker 1: guy like she had the right one that day. Can

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Speaker 1: I be honest with you in for a second when

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Speaker 1: you when you you kept calling the phone right so

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Speaker 1: like the phone rang like twice and it was in

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Speaker 1: the bed with me. Remember when I faced time you

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Speaker 1: but you ain't seeing my body like going up and down.

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Speaker 1: I was fucking I'm about to go to jail, and

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Speaker 1: she fucking like. I'm just like like on FaceTime like

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Speaker 1: this my head bobbing, and I'm like and I'm like,

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Speaker 1: I'm so mad right now. Yeah, And he's like, as crazy,

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Speaker 1: I don't calling my bad friend. I was in the

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Speaker 1: middle of some ship. I know you had a whole

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Speaker 1: god them red alert. I'm sorry, Okay, the police couldn't

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Speaker 1: do nothing to me because I didn't do nothing wrong,

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Speaker 1: but the fact that another black woman called a police

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Speaker 1: on me, she was just trying to have a power

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Speaker 1: moment over me. Girl. I was like, the lesson that

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Speaker 1: you're trying to teach me, you're gonna learn today, So

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Speaker 1: continue on because I'm not paying for that ship. And

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Speaker 1: I'm going to send an email tomorrow about my customer. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: hell yeah, we're doing all things caring this year. If

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Speaker 1: you're playing around, so I'm sending emails to corporate on

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Speaker 1: your host and I can't wait. That's all. I don't

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Speaker 1: eat out for real. Why are you being so mean

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Speaker 1: to me? Because those bitches be disgruntled, they'd be disgruntled

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Speaker 1: a lot, and they wouldn't do a white person. And

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Speaker 1: I was the only black person at the only other

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Speaker 1: black person besides her, and she treated me like straight shit.

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Speaker 1: We do each other like that. I don't. I don't do.

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Speaker 1: I go out of my way to say hi to

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Speaker 1: black people when I see them, eye contact Hi. You

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Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, even if they keep walking past

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Speaker 1: me like I tried to. I'm just a nice person

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Speaker 1: black people. I'm nice to everybody, you know, anybody that's

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Speaker 1: kind to me. I'm kind bat you know. And for

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Speaker 1: you to treat me like that, girl, I can't wait

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Speaker 1: to see if i can get your job in my

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Speaker 1: back pocket. And I'm gonna try my best because you

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Speaker 1: if you're treating me like that, you probably treating other

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Speaker 1: black people like that at that bar. And that's not right.

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Speaker 1: You called a police. What the police came and beat

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Speaker 1: my ass and killed me or something? Right over a

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Speaker 1: bowl of French fries. Girl, You lucky I had somewhere

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Speaker 1: to be because I'd have been waiting on you at

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Speaker 1: the dog. I'm giving you a reason to call the

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Speaker 1: police this time, I hope. Right. So let's get into

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Speaker 1: us and let's get in a stupid ending. That news

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Speaker 1: today's crea, Yes, let's talk about it. She like you

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Speaker 1: and peeting on y'all Golden showers. And you know everybody's

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Speaker 1: been talking about her relationship with P Diddy, and now

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Speaker 1: the P instead of puff and now stands for Urine Karsha.

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Speaker 1: We gotta do a whole episode on black women in

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Speaker 1: kink because I can't get into the spit in the mouth,

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Speaker 1: the p the poop, the B D s M. Ship

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Speaker 1: Like I might know, I might want to get tied

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Speaker 1: up and I like a little violence, you know, choke me,

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Speaker 1: you know that type of ship. But listen, piano is

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Speaker 1: just kind of that's where I draw the line. Pe

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Speaker 1: and poop, That's just like, that's where I draw the line.

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Speaker 1: I'm not doing that because it's like your body's waste.

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Speaker 1: I don't understand why anybody would want somebody's bodily waste

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Speaker 1: on them in a pleasurable way. I don't know the

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Speaker 1: psychic behind it, but hey, whatever floats your boat because

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Speaker 1: it's warm. Or I know a guy who said he'd

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Speaker 1: like to pee inside a woman, like like what about U?

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Speaker 1: T eyes? Like? What like pe inside me? Oh ahead,

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Speaker 1: how do you even do that? When I erect penis

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Speaker 1: like that? He said he can do it? Oh, I

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Speaker 1: guess you do pee, I don't know what the fuck.

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Speaker 1: So if somebody offer you a million dollars right now,

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Speaker 1: one million dollars and you can see it sitting on

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Speaker 1: the table like motherfucker may wear the laid out and

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Speaker 1: was like a j you can have this money. I don't.

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Speaker 1: I'm good. If you let me pee on you, you

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Speaker 1: wouldn't take it? Yes, okay, I look it ain't that

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Speaker 1: bade one m for a little golden shower. That's different.

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Speaker 1: Do you think that Karsia is just getting a million

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Speaker 1: dollars every time you get piste on? No from ditty.

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Speaker 1: You can pee on me right now for about fifty bands.

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Speaker 1: It's a recession. Ain't gotta be a price tag on

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Speaker 1: because I'm just not doing that because I'm n I

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Speaker 1: have a goal to me. I need a fucking M

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Speaker 1: by forty, like that's the goal. I need a couple

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Speaker 1: of ms by four. So if that's gonna get me

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Speaker 1: one step closer, just a little warmth, right, little yurine

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Speaker 1: like maybe little mellow yellow, I I will do it.

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Speaker 1: I'd like take me the Capital Grill and get me

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Speaker 1: like four dirty martinis in dinner and fifty dollars that

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Speaker 1: we could make it happen. It's raining bands. Okay, let

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Speaker 1: me get that. Listen. So she took the Twitter and

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Speaker 1: she said, um, now, y'all know I don't give a

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Speaker 1: fuck that. Let me tell you. My mama always says

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Speaker 1: my grandma would tell her when you find a person

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Speaker 1: I don't care about nothing, leave them to funk alone. Okay,

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Speaker 1: So she said, y'all know, I don't give a fuck.

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Speaker 1: Reach and Roulette eight for the week, whatever that means.

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Speaker 1: I want to get that game. It don't come out

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Speaker 1: till March, though, So I'm gonna get it though, because

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Speaker 1: I want to play. But I ain't peeing. We ain't

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Speaker 1: nobody peeing on me. That's an actual game. It's a

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Speaker 1: current game that she played on the show. Interesting. I

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Speaker 1: want to hear from our listeners and maybe I'll put

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Speaker 1: that out. They're like, what's the craziest thing your significant

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Speaker 1: other or some random nigga from I don't know, Pieces

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Speaker 1: of Fish ever did to you? What is the nasty

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Speaker 1: We're gonna do that episode. Maybe we'll bring some people

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Speaker 1: on to talk about it. No, I tell you what

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Speaker 1: the nastiest thing that I'm a whisper. So my mama

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Speaker 1: don't hear it. So when I was in college, my

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Speaker 1: roommate she came in the room and she was all

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Speaker 1: like freaked out and ship and I was like, girl,

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Speaker 1: what's wrong with you? She was like, bitch, my nigga

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Speaker 1: just bust on my ass and then licked it off.

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Speaker 1: Lika came up, come off her butt, and I got

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Speaker 1: a big old ass. But she had a big old

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Speaker 1: ass in college, so I know he was doing a

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Speaker 1: lot of licking. And I think she actually broke up

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Speaker 1: with him, like maybe a couple of weeks after that.

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Speaker 1: Ship surely then after rightfully, so like I'll be looking

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Speaker 1: at you like, nigga, would you do that to him? Man?

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Speaker 1: Like right, did you you like to taste of that?

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Speaker 1: Because I can't produce it right, and I don't like

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Speaker 1: the taste of it. You eat it? Not mean? Right?

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Speaker 1: Speaking of weird, a Utah woman marries her cousin all right,

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Speaker 1: So she went on TikTok. This woman named Marcella Hill.

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Speaker 1: Her and her husband Page found out they were third

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Speaker 1: cousins while looking online for baby names. So the woman

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Speaker 1: is pregnant and they're looking trying to name the baby,

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Speaker 1: and they're looking at their like ancestry and they realized

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Speaker 1: that her grandma was first cousins or something like that

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Speaker 1: with her his grandfather, and so they called their grandparents

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Speaker 1: and it was like, yeah, they're my cousin. What do

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Speaker 1: you do when you find out that you're you're you're

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Speaker 1: married to your third cousin? That I don't feel like

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Speaker 1: they haven't in Black families married girl, what's not? Maybe

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Speaker 1: not married, but definitely smashing because I feel like I've

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Speaker 1: smashed the fifth cousin before, after third, it don't matter.

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Speaker 1: I'm like my older cousin was like, you know that's

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Speaker 1: your cousin, right, I'm like, know the funk it ain't

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Speaker 1: because if it is, it's too late, it's too late. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: And as dick a little something like, damn this little

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Speaker 1: dick running our family. I don't know, I don't know. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's too late now they gotta say. I mean, I'm

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Speaker 1: not leaving my husband because I found out he my

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Speaker 1: cousin and when I got a baby by him, all right,

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Speaker 1: who else gonna know that? I feel like people probably

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Speaker 1: come across family members all the time at some point, yea,

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Speaker 1: especially from certain areas, you know what I'm saying, Like

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Speaker 1: certain places A lot of people be related. They don't

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Speaker 1: cross breathe. Yeah, we like I look back at my

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Speaker 1: family tree, there was like some definitely some cross breathing

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Speaker 1: going off, and it was closer. It was close, you know,

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Speaker 1: you look down the family tree is like, hold on,

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Speaker 1: wait this say she married him, but that looked like

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Speaker 1: her uncle, nephew or something like that, right, that happens.

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Speaker 1: Speaking of pregnant ladies, so chris Sean Rock says that

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Speaker 1: she is having Blue Faces baby potentially twins, and I

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Speaker 1: don't know man, so blue Faces like well, Rock has

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Speaker 1: had encounters with ten different men in the last year.

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Speaker 1: Until I see a DNA test, then it's not mine

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Speaker 1: to answer your questions. Yes, me and Rock are officially done.

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Speaker 1: It's strictly, strictly business. I tried it and clearly it

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Speaker 1: wasn't giving. Before she announced, Um, she's pregnant with somebody

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Speaker 1: else baby, not mine. I love to catch your motherfucking

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Speaker 1: lying with substantial evidence is such a sweet victory. So

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Speaker 1: now all of a sudden, this girl is pregnant. Now

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Speaker 1: you're gonna really cut it off right If she's actually pregnant.

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Speaker 1: She posted um some positive pregnancy tests on online uh um.

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Speaker 1: Her her fucking mental health is declining. Yeah, did you

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Speaker 1: see she was just recently on an interview UM and

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Speaker 1: a therapy session on the show drinking a bottle of

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Speaker 1: motherfucking patron. Who would la she would never go for

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Speaker 1: no ship like that. You're drinking patron in her face?

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Speaker 1: Like that hold on in therapy allowed her to drinking. No, no, no,

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Speaker 1: I said she would never. She was in a I forgot.

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Speaker 1: The therapist is a black eye who's on on that

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Speaker 1: UM on the show with him, and she was drinking

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Speaker 1: from the bottle. Yes, but you're pregnant. I'm confused, So um,

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Speaker 1: I I would I hope she's not pregnant too, so

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Speaker 1: that she can get time to get her mental health

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Speaker 1: together and maybe, you know, take a break from this guy.

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Speaker 1: They young, he needs to grow up. He's reproducing. He

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Speaker 1: has multiple kids already. You know these people, it's like

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Speaker 1: it's like niggas really be having babies quicker than regular

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Speaker 1: black people. It's like, what the fuck, Like they just

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Speaker 1: got all the time in the world and get pregnant.

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Speaker 1: God damn. You know women, I know right now I'm

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Speaker 1: struggling to have one baby, and I see a lot

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Speaker 1: of women like, uh, saying, girl, call me and I

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Speaker 1: take you to the UH to them people to get

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Speaker 1: rid of that, and then we can go to get

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Speaker 1: drinks after. Stuff like that is so ignorant the way

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Speaker 1: we promote abortion in our community, like that as ignorant

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Speaker 1: as because that girl already says she's having her baby,

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Speaker 1: So why would any other woman be suggesting that she

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Speaker 1: had an abortion. Plus she already had abortions, you know,

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Speaker 1: and then you don't know until you're in your late

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Speaker 1: thirties you really really want to have a baby. Well,

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Speaker 1: here's the reason why there's suggesting that she having an

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Speaker 1: abortion is because now you have, once you have a

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Speaker 1: child with someone, you have to deal with in the

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Speaker 1: rest of your life, you know. And that's obviously what

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Speaker 1: she wants. Toxic situation. And that's why I would assume

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Speaker 1: that other women are like, girl, don't do that, you know,

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Speaker 1: just let it go. But she's already had abortions, and

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Speaker 1: she didn't leave him alone. She literally has this nigga

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Speaker 1: face and name tattooed on her body multiple times. She

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Speaker 1: doesn't she doesn't seem like a stable mind. I don't

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Speaker 1: think that she should be procreating right now. But that's

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Speaker 1: not for me to say, you know what I'm saying, like,

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Speaker 1: that's not for another woman to suggest her to have

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Speaker 1: an abortion on top of the fact that she's already

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Speaker 1: had multiple abortions. What about you know what she what

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Speaker 1: she's putting her body through and her mental health? Right,

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Speaker 1: you ain't never took nobody to get an abortion before. No,

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Speaker 1: I funded one before. But no, no, I definitely have

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Speaker 1: taken a friend of to to the to the to

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Speaker 1: the shop. But let me tell you it was it was.

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Speaker 1: It was bad because I was like, my friend, you know,

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Speaker 1: whatever you need, I got you. And it wasn't an

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Speaker 1: easy thing for her, you know, like, I don't think

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Speaker 1: it's you know, some people are very desensitized to it

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Speaker 1: and they can do it without thinking twice. But my

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Speaker 1: friend wasn't that person. I'm not that person. And we

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Speaker 1: pull up and they had them signs outside, like you know,

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Speaker 1: the people who be protesting. Yeah. I was like, which

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Speaker 1: one of y'all? And I immediately folded on that bitch.

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Speaker 1: I was like this, huh. She was like damn, damn.

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Speaker 1: I was like, I'm sorry. It was pressure bench. They

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Speaker 1: had that little white baby holding that little white dog

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Speaker 1: baby out there. Oh, goodness. And then we went inside

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Speaker 1: and it was a lady in there with four kids.

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Speaker 1: The babies were in there with her. She didn't even

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Speaker 1: have anybody to watch her kids for her while she

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Speaker 1: Why are you fucking That's what we need to reevaluate.

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Speaker 1: We gotta have a little bit more accountability, yes, because

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Speaker 1: abortion is not birth control. Okay, birth control is what

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Speaker 1: happens before you get pregnant. Well, lot of you don't

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Speaker 1: get pregnant. You're not, And that's fucked up. That is

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Speaker 1: so fucked up. That is fucked up. And I feel

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Speaker 1: like that's what we need that I feel like a

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Speaker 1: woman can control getting pregnant. We can all these apps

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Speaker 1: out here now where you can monitor your ovulation and

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Speaker 1: your and your cycle and all that ship like they

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Speaker 1: literally work. My should be down to a t. I

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Speaker 1: use my days. I've been using it for a year.

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Speaker 1: My ovulation, Yeah, you got fit b it. Apple doesn't

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Speaker 1: now like checking your fu heart rate all day long

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Speaker 1: everything like you can. You're fucking lazy. There's no reason.

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Speaker 1: I mean, it can happen, right, But if you're just

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Speaker 1: you can let a nigga come in you all day long.

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Speaker 1: Just don't do it around your ovulation time. Yeah, use condoms.

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Speaker 1: I'm an advocate for that. That part, that part you

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Speaker 1: have birth control, which is before even a plan B.

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Speaker 1: If you gotta go that route, you got seventy two

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Speaker 1: hours after that nigga came in you. And if you

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Speaker 1: fucking with somebody who can't afford to buy you a

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Speaker 1: damn uh fifty dollar playing b bill, you already fucking up.

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Speaker 1: Like women, got it, we gotta take more responsibility for

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Speaker 1: this bullshit and not be suggesting other young black women.

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00:19:05,440 --> 00:19:08,760
Speaker 1: And they have they have another one that's even cheaper

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Speaker 1: than that, like LoVa Nestra, something like that, long long

337
00:19:11,920 --> 00:19:18,960
Speaker 1: and something. It's like a but they have the same ingredients. Yeah, yeah,

338
00:19:19,160 --> 00:19:22,360
Speaker 1: you can get this up. So what's the ladies take

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00:19:22,400 --> 00:19:25,919
Speaker 1: accountability for your body? You know? Yeah, it's not the

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00:19:25,920 --> 00:19:29,200
Speaker 1: men's responsibility. The condoms really not even responsibility at that point,

341
00:19:29,240 --> 00:19:30,720
Speaker 1: because they're gonna try to put that dick in you

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Speaker 1: raw every time you have to say what a condomat

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Speaker 1: If you're dealing with anybody who's not irresponsible, some of

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Speaker 1: these niggas is not at the same rate. We can't

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Speaker 1: we can't blame the men though. It's us. It's us

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00:19:46,680 --> 00:19:49,040
Speaker 1: we got control over that ship. If you're working with

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Speaker 1: somebody who just goes, you don't think he's just sticking

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Speaker 1: his dick in somebody else the same way. Child, Please,

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Speaker 1: I don't know. I feel like I'm preaching to the choir. Right.

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Speaker 1: Oh that's y'all can't stand me because I'm pull that

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Speaker 1: hole that mirror up on your ass real quick, boy,

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Speaker 1: Fuck you, Nigga commented on the Instagram page. Stop but

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Speaker 1: he can't stand me sometimes stand these nuts? How about

354
00:20:12,640 --> 00:20:17,000
Speaker 1: that with your bit ass. We're gonna break through. We'll

355
00:20:17,040 --> 00:20:25,320
Speaker 1: be right back, all right. So we're back, y'all. And

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Speaker 1: you know what I want to talk about today? What

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Speaker 1: are like some of the proper methods or some of

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00:20:31,480 --> 00:20:33,359
Speaker 1: the methods that you used to break up? Because I

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Speaker 1: can tell you guys, in my last relationship, I literally

360
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Speaker 1: had to go to therapy. It was like one of

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Speaker 1: the hardest things I ever had to do, you know,

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Speaker 1: because one part of your mind is like, damn, you know,

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Speaker 1: maybe we could work it out because you got those

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Speaker 1: good times you keep thinking about, right, But then if

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00:20:50,560 --> 00:20:56,159
Speaker 1: the bad times it's just like over powering overpowering the

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Speaker 1: good times, get the funk up out of there. But

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Speaker 1: I literally had to go to a therapist to break up,

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Speaker 1: like a breakup therapist, and it made it easier because

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Speaker 1: then you know, I was I had to recognize like

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Speaker 1: why why am I going to say in this relationship?

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Speaker 1: Like it makes you hold of mirror for the most part.

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Speaker 1: You know, a therapist, they really don't give you answers.

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Speaker 1: They forced you to find your answers. Yeah. Um. And

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Speaker 1: it was actually two different therapists. One was a woman,

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Speaker 1: one was a man. The woman was like, what you

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Speaker 1: gonna do? She wasn't trying to tell me what to do,

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Speaker 1: but she was like, bitch, you know what to do essentially,

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Speaker 1: And the guy, of course, was like, well maybe it

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Speaker 1: could be worked out. And I'm like, no, right, there's

380
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Speaker 1: no salvaging this none, not at all, And I don't

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Speaker 1: need any more couples therapy, and then I need therapy

382
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Speaker 1: for me at this Then at that point, it's like

383
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Speaker 1: when you stay in something that really holds no value,

384
00:21:54,320 --> 00:21:56,760
Speaker 1: then you gotta be accountable for still being there, you

385
00:21:56,800 --> 00:22:00,960
Speaker 1: know exactly, because then you ain't got nobody to blame yourself.

386
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Speaker 1: M yep. And so for years I had nobody to

387
00:22:04,640 --> 00:22:06,520
Speaker 1: blame but myself and not even at the end, I'm

388
00:22:06,520 --> 00:22:09,560
Speaker 1: still not trying to blame him, but it still ends

389
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Speaker 1: with you. You know what I'm saying. People only do

390
00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:14,760
Speaker 1: what you're allowed them to do for one and you

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Speaker 1: women know when it's time to go. I feel like

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Speaker 1: oftentimes we stay in in situations longer than we should,

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Speaker 1: even men. I feel like men actually do suffer and

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00:22:23,520 --> 00:22:28,880
Speaker 1: bad relationships longer, especially the deal. Yeah, they'll just deal

395
00:22:29,200 --> 00:22:31,560
Speaker 1: because you know, they'll see the bigger pictures. Women be

396
00:22:31,600 --> 00:22:34,680
Speaker 1: like my happiness. They'll go find the happiness outside of

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00:22:34,760 --> 00:22:37,960
Speaker 1: the relationship to fulfill them so they can stay in

398
00:22:38,000 --> 00:22:43,359
Speaker 1: the relationship exactly. So you know, I'm on clubhouse, you know,

399
00:22:43,440 --> 00:22:46,320
Speaker 1: not even a lot anymore. But the main thing black

400
00:22:46,359 --> 00:22:49,680
Speaker 1: men love to say is the statistics on how black

401
00:22:49,720 --> 00:22:54,520
Speaker 1: women are the ones doing the divorces. We do the paperwork.

402
00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:58,400
Speaker 1: Niggas leave the relationship way before we do the paperwork.

403
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Speaker 1: We're used to doing the paperwork. We do all of it.

404
00:23:00,920 --> 00:23:03,640
Speaker 1: We do your doctor paperwork, we do everything. Sometimes women

405
00:23:03,680 --> 00:23:06,400
Speaker 1: are feeling out applications for me. We all we did

406
00:23:06,440 --> 00:23:09,800
Speaker 1: was file the paperwork. But oftentimes the man been left

407
00:23:09,800 --> 00:23:13,679
Speaker 1: the relationship. You know, even when we had our daddy's on.

408
00:23:13,800 --> 00:23:16,240
Speaker 1: Remember my daddy was like, my daddy was like no

409
00:23:16,359 --> 00:23:20,199
Speaker 1: woman ever came between him and my mom relationship. I'm like,

410
00:23:20,280 --> 00:23:22,760
Speaker 1: you were cheating, you were coming home with white bitches

411
00:23:22,800 --> 00:23:25,720
Speaker 1: here on you black bitches here, like just hell a

412
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Speaker 1: disrespectful and my mom is not like that bitch. You'll

413
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Speaker 1: literally not talked to you again. And like because she

414
00:23:32,720 --> 00:23:35,200
Speaker 1: has children with him, was like, that's her family at

415
00:23:35,200 --> 00:23:37,959
Speaker 1: this point. If my dad gets sick today, my mom

416
00:23:38,040 --> 00:23:41,520
Speaker 1: would go take care of him, she would help, but

417
00:23:41,640 --> 00:23:44,080
Speaker 1: she don't funk with him like that. I've literally seen

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Speaker 1: my mom's like break up with a nigga and never

419
00:23:46,760 --> 00:23:50,000
Speaker 1: talked to them to the day they died, and the

420
00:23:50,080 --> 00:23:53,080
Speaker 1: nigga was contacting me just to have a little piece

421
00:23:53,080 --> 00:23:59,159
Speaker 1: in my mama. He died, died, Yes, he died, and

422
00:23:59,200 --> 00:24:00,879
Speaker 1: I was so sad about it because he was like

423
00:24:00,920 --> 00:24:03,639
Speaker 1: a father figure to me too. And when he died,

424
00:24:03,680 --> 00:24:06,280
Speaker 1: she just told me like regular, oh yeah, so and

425
00:24:06,280 --> 00:24:10,440
Speaker 1: so died. Um. I heard what. I was devastated because

426
00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:12,760
Speaker 1: I had just spoken to him. She was like that

427
00:24:12,880 --> 00:24:15,000
Speaker 1: she didn't know, you need something from the store. I'm

428
00:24:15,000 --> 00:24:16,840
Speaker 1: about to go to the right She was just said,

429
00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:18,760
Speaker 1: that's like it's regular. That's why you gotta be careful

430
00:24:18,800 --> 00:24:20,639
Speaker 1: like women with children, like who are you inviting your

431
00:24:20,680 --> 00:24:22,880
Speaker 1: kids lives? Because you don't know the impact that those

432
00:24:22,880 --> 00:24:26,640
Speaker 1: people have, right that part? Yeah, because that was definitely

433
00:24:26,680 --> 00:24:32,359
Speaker 1: a father figure for I've only had two real relationships

434
00:24:32,359 --> 00:24:35,479
Speaker 1: in my life, and I got dump both times, so

435
00:24:35,600 --> 00:24:37,600
Speaker 1: I don't even know. I ain't never had the opportunity

436
00:24:37,720 --> 00:24:43,480
Speaker 1: to dump nobody. Dad, you were sticking I was sticking out.

437
00:24:43,480 --> 00:24:49,880
Speaker 1: You'd be like this bad, but I'm a stake everything else.

438
00:24:50,160 --> 00:24:54,159
Speaker 1: But then I also have commitment phobia, so I was

439
00:24:54,200 --> 00:24:57,879
Speaker 1: like very okay with like situation ships, like no titles,

440
00:24:58,960 --> 00:25:01,640
Speaker 1: so it ain't nothing to break up from. We can't

441
00:25:01,640 --> 00:25:05,439
Speaker 1: break up if we together. Now that's some bullshit. You

442
00:25:05,520 --> 00:25:08,000
Speaker 1: sucked me raw, we together? I don't suck raw. I

443
00:25:08,000 --> 00:25:14,240
Speaker 1: don't be fucking wrong. Oh see there's that party read

444
00:25:14,280 --> 00:25:16,919
Speaker 1: you're my whole boyfriend? Like it or not? All right?

445
00:25:16,960 --> 00:25:18,760
Speaker 1: So it's fair to say I kind of broke up

446
00:25:18,760 --> 00:25:22,840
Speaker 1: with people because I've ended situation ships, but I've never

447
00:25:22,880 --> 00:25:27,200
Speaker 1: had like the people I was really committed to dump

448
00:25:27,240 --> 00:25:29,720
Speaker 1: mean both times, but let me tell you this, they

449
00:25:29,760 --> 00:25:32,879
Speaker 1: came back. They tried to. But once you ended with me, baby,

450
00:25:32,880 --> 00:25:34,800
Speaker 1: ain't no coming back. That's one thing I don't do

451
00:25:35,600 --> 00:25:37,320
Speaker 1: because that should be hurt. And I'd be like, you

452
00:25:37,400 --> 00:25:42,359
Speaker 1: really want to be done one? You know suck Oh,

453
00:25:42,440 --> 00:25:44,640
Speaker 1: you can't circle back once you done me. It's it's

454
00:25:44,640 --> 00:25:47,640
Speaker 1: a wrap. But they try, both of them did get

455
00:25:47,680 --> 00:25:52,359
Speaker 1: somebody else to do it. But my situation ship said

456
00:25:52,359 --> 00:25:57,680
Speaker 1: I ended. I think I don't know. I'm real Frank,

457
00:25:57,840 --> 00:25:59,600
Speaker 1: when it gets to that point, it's kind of like

458
00:25:59,800 --> 00:26:01,320
Speaker 1: this same work and I don't want to do it

459
00:26:01,359 --> 00:26:06,240
Speaker 1: no more. All right, We're still cool though, Like I'm always,

460
00:26:06,280 --> 00:26:09,520
Speaker 1: I always keep that energy. It ain't never like it

461
00:26:09,640 --> 00:26:12,080
Speaker 1: has been some situations where I'm like, boy, I speed

462
00:26:12,160 --> 00:26:14,160
Speaker 1: on you if I see you in publicly, don't play

463
00:26:14,200 --> 00:26:17,240
Speaker 1: with me because of the disrespect that it happened in

464
00:26:17,280 --> 00:26:19,919
Speaker 1: the situation ship. But for the most part, if I

465
00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:22,720
Speaker 1: ended with you, it ain't it's all off. I speak

466
00:26:22,800 --> 00:26:25,959
Speaker 1: to you. I had gnad you if I see you outside,

467
00:26:28,600 --> 00:26:33,000
Speaker 1: and that's it. What about you? Well, I've been in

468
00:26:34,800 --> 00:26:39,479
Speaker 1: four serious relationships my entire life, and I've broke up

469
00:26:39,880 --> 00:26:43,040
Speaker 1: with each one of them. Um. One I had to

470
00:26:43,080 --> 00:26:47,280
Speaker 1: move eight hundred miles away, and one, UM I feel

471
00:26:47,320 --> 00:26:50,199
Speaker 1: like I moved in all the relationships for real, like

472
00:26:50,280 --> 00:26:53,760
Speaker 1: I just sucking pick up and move like my first boyfriend,

473
00:26:54,520 --> 00:26:59,000
Speaker 1: her and Charleston. I really didn't um break up with

474
00:26:59,080 --> 00:27:01,040
Speaker 1: him in that way. He just didn't want to move

475
00:27:01,040 --> 00:27:04,520
Speaker 1: with me, Like I moved back to Colombia and I'm like,

476
00:27:04,560 --> 00:27:07,280
Speaker 1: come with me. Like it took that nigga years to

477
00:27:07,359 --> 00:27:11,359
Speaker 1: leave his mom's house. I'm like, I'm twenty one, Like Nigga,

478
00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:15,080
Speaker 1: move like, let's go. I'm in college here, I'm working, Like,

479
00:27:16,040 --> 00:27:18,000
Speaker 1: come on, what the funk are you? Like? We could

480
00:27:18,000 --> 00:27:20,240
Speaker 1: have probably built a really nice life together, because that's

481
00:27:20,240 --> 00:27:21,679
Speaker 1: one of my good friends still to this day. I

482
00:27:21,680 --> 00:27:25,560
Speaker 1: need to call his mama. But Nigga would He would

483
00:27:25,640 --> 00:27:29,720
Speaker 1: not fucking move. He wouldn't and he just wasn't doing

484
00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:33,680
Speaker 1: He wasn't ambitious enough, he wasn't working. Like I'm twenty one.

485
00:27:33,720 --> 00:27:36,840
Speaker 1: We going on vacation, Nigga, I'm paying for it. That's

486
00:27:36,840 --> 00:27:41,240
Speaker 1: what the fun was happening in that relationship. Yes, so

487
00:27:41,520 --> 00:27:43,120
Speaker 1: you know we and him, me and him going into

488
00:27:43,160 --> 00:27:48,120
Speaker 1: a really really, really bad fight one night, because this

489
00:27:48,160 --> 00:27:51,000
Speaker 1: is when Palm Trio had just came out. Remember Palm Trios,

490
00:27:51,040 --> 00:27:56,560
Speaker 1: Like the first first touch screen Quarty keyboard. Yes, I

491
00:27:56,600 --> 00:27:59,720
Speaker 1: had a Palm trio. He was with me when I

492
00:27:59,760 --> 00:28:03,119
Speaker 1: bought this phone. Five d sixty something fucking dollars cash.

493
00:28:03,240 --> 00:28:06,840
Speaker 1: I paid for his phone. We went to his sister house.

494
00:28:06,920 --> 00:28:09,119
Speaker 1: She wanted to see, like how the phone worked. This

495
00:28:09,280 --> 00:28:11,760
Speaker 1: I'm just giving y'all. When we finally called it like

496
00:28:11,840 --> 00:28:17,520
Speaker 1: for real, I've stopped with him, um, and she was

497
00:28:17,640 --> 00:28:20,800
Speaker 1: using my phone and she went through my pictures and

498
00:28:20,800 --> 00:28:23,679
Speaker 1: a nigga popped up on the screen. Mind you, I

499
00:28:23,720 --> 00:28:25,640
Speaker 1: had just went on a date with somebody a couple

500
00:28:25,640 --> 00:28:28,400
Speaker 1: of days prior, and I was lying to him telling

501
00:28:28,480 --> 00:28:30,359
Speaker 1: him I was out with my home girls, and it

502
00:28:30,480 --> 00:28:33,600
Speaker 1: was only because I wanted somebody to fucking do for

503
00:28:33,760 --> 00:28:37,399
Speaker 1: me for one. That's only right as a woman. So

504
00:28:37,480 --> 00:28:40,640
Speaker 1: he put he put me in pants essentially when we're young,

505
00:28:40,760 --> 00:28:42,760
Speaker 1: you know. And I just feel like women just be

506
00:28:42,760 --> 00:28:47,840
Speaker 1: getting to the bag quickening guys when they're young. So, um, girl,

507
00:28:48,040 --> 00:28:49,920
Speaker 1: I could see and he wore glasses. Girl, When I

508
00:28:49,920 --> 00:28:51,720
Speaker 1: tell you, a little demon pop that nick When he

509
00:28:51,720 --> 00:28:58,520
Speaker 1: saw that phone, bitch, he slammed my phone on a

510
00:28:58,640 --> 00:29:00,960
Speaker 1: concrete that ship like a more start bawled it up,

511
00:29:01,920 --> 00:29:04,240
Speaker 1: and then he left me in the projects he grew

512
00:29:04,320 --> 00:29:06,960
Speaker 1: up in, so I had to call my daddy to

513
00:29:07,040 --> 00:29:08,960
Speaker 1: come get me. Mind you, I was just in town

514
00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:11,280
Speaker 1: to get my dad's car because my car had broke down,

515
00:29:11,920 --> 00:29:13,920
Speaker 1: so I only came to Charleston to get his car

516
00:29:14,000 --> 00:29:18,880
Speaker 1: set and go back to Columbia. And that nigga um

517
00:29:19,160 --> 00:29:21,600
Speaker 1: left me there and I'm like, no phone, no nothing,

518
00:29:22,440 --> 00:29:25,760
Speaker 1: and I had to like, I'm crying in the parking lot.

519
00:29:25,840 --> 00:29:28,000
Speaker 1: I had to ask somebody to use a cell phone

520
00:29:29,000 --> 00:29:31,200
Speaker 1: to call my dad. And so when I called my dad,

521
00:29:31,360 --> 00:29:34,520
Speaker 1: my daddy was like, you got a choice to make

522
00:29:35,080 --> 00:29:37,840
Speaker 1: because if I get involved, somebody's gonna get hurt. So

523
00:29:37,920 --> 00:29:40,440
Speaker 1: either you're gonna be with him or you're not. And

524
00:29:40,480 --> 00:29:42,360
Speaker 1: from that day for it, we weren't together no more.

525
00:29:42,720 --> 00:29:46,040
Speaker 1: I made the choice. So maybe my dad was the

526
00:29:45,520 --> 00:29:49,000
Speaker 1: the therapist in that situation. I just didn't funk with

527
00:29:49,040 --> 00:29:50,800
Speaker 1: a no more after that. Well, he was right to

528
00:29:50,880 --> 00:29:55,640
Speaker 1: be at though, because regardless of him being broke, y'all

529
00:29:55,640 --> 00:29:58,320
Speaker 1: still were committed to each other. That nigga was cheating,

530
00:29:59,240 --> 00:30:01,680
Speaker 1: imagine being broke and I don't caught you cheating. That's

531
00:30:01,720 --> 00:30:04,000
Speaker 1: the first time you ever seen anything in my motherfucking phone.

532
00:30:04,120 --> 00:30:07,120
Speaker 1: Oh he was cheating. He had cheated on me prior

533
00:30:07,160 --> 00:30:10,720
Speaker 1: to then. Yeah, imagine that. Imagine you being a broken

534
00:30:10,760 --> 00:30:12,520
Speaker 1: nigger and you cheating on me like that is just

535
00:30:12,680 --> 00:30:15,360
Speaker 1: I'm not dealing with that. But I did deal with

536
00:30:15,400 --> 00:30:19,200
Speaker 1: it a couple more months, obviously, right for us to

537
00:30:19,240 --> 00:30:20,880
Speaker 1: get to the point to where I'm going on dates

538
00:30:20,920 --> 00:30:25,120
Speaker 1: and ship now giving a fun how you feel? No,

539
00:30:25,280 --> 00:30:30,040
Speaker 1: that's crazy. Yes, so my daddy broke us up. Um no,

540
00:30:30,160 --> 00:30:34,080
Speaker 1: that trio broke you'll answer. Can I use your phone

541
00:30:34,120 --> 00:30:39,680
Speaker 1: real clay? Right? Um, let me see. After that, I

542
00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:42,240
Speaker 1: moved to like the next relationship, I moved to Atlanta

543
00:30:42,240 --> 00:30:44,000
Speaker 1: on the nigga. Then that wasn't far enough because he

544
00:30:44,080 --> 00:30:47,480
Speaker 1: was driving from South Carolina to Atlanta every fucking weekends.

545
00:30:47,560 --> 00:30:50,320
Speaker 1: I moved to St. Louis because I couldn't stop sucking

546
00:30:50,440 --> 00:30:57,480
Speaker 1: him because I just moved. Um. After that, Um, oh,

547
00:30:57,600 --> 00:30:59,400
Speaker 1: the fans broke me and my ex and one is

548
00:30:59,440 --> 00:31:01,880
Speaker 1: in prison. He gets out in about thirty days. But

549
00:31:01,920 --> 00:31:04,160
Speaker 1: the fans broke us up. I probably stole Ben with

550
00:31:04,200 --> 00:31:08,640
Speaker 1: that fucking nigga getting driven crazy after goddamn wall. So

551
00:31:08,760 --> 00:31:10,880
Speaker 1: God came through on that one, Like I bet you

552
00:31:10,880 --> 00:31:14,040
Speaker 1: ain't leaving. It was days. I would literally be putting

553
00:31:14,040 --> 00:31:15,400
Speaker 1: my ship in the car and that they would be

554
00:31:15,400 --> 00:31:18,360
Speaker 1: taking my ship out simultaneously, like you ain't about to

555
00:31:18,400 --> 00:31:24,560
Speaker 1: go to your mama house and and embarrassed me. So

556
00:31:24,600 --> 00:31:26,760
Speaker 1: the god and the fans broke us up. So you

557
00:31:26,760 --> 00:31:31,400
Speaker 1: didn't really end it now. Yeah, once he got sentenced,

558
00:31:31,400 --> 00:31:32,720
Speaker 1: I was like, you know, I gotta move on my

559
00:31:32,760 --> 00:31:34,400
Speaker 1: life because I don't. I don't wait for a minute

560
00:31:34,400 --> 00:31:38,400
Speaker 1: come home from prisoner. I think I had one situation ship. Well,

561
00:31:38,400 --> 00:31:42,240
Speaker 1: I guess we were kind of together. This was in Atlanta,

562
00:31:44,080 --> 00:31:45,880
Speaker 1: but I was we're here for all the wrong reasons.

563
00:31:46,040 --> 00:31:49,240
Speaker 1: He was not not the It was a Dominican. I

564
00:31:49,280 --> 00:31:53,360
Speaker 1: didn't tell you about this, nigga. I hadn't tell you

565
00:31:53,520 --> 00:31:57,240
Speaker 1: Poppy the poppy I was dealing with. The police took

566
00:31:57,320 --> 00:32:00,080
Speaker 1: him from me too and deported him. So that was

567
00:32:00,120 --> 00:32:04,400
Speaker 1: a situation that ended with Jim the Porte. I got

568
00:32:04,480 --> 00:32:07,400
Speaker 1: rid of his ass. Look when my ex got locked up,

569
00:32:07,480 --> 00:32:11,560
Speaker 1: the motherfucker's had is shut online. Um his race as Cuban.

570
00:32:12,800 --> 00:32:15,280
Speaker 1: They really thought they had Yeah, they really thought they

571
00:32:15,400 --> 00:32:19,640
Speaker 1: busted something Dominican or Cuban drug lord. But he wasn't Charleston,

572
00:32:19,920 --> 00:32:23,160
Speaker 1: but he was black light skining black right. He had

573
00:32:23,200 --> 00:32:27,760
Speaker 1: that work now, but but he definitely wasn't one of them.

574
00:32:27,800 --> 00:32:31,200
Speaker 1: So let's get into our list. I found a list

575
00:32:31,280 --> 00:32:35,480
Speaker 1: on Marx manson dot net. UH ten rules for breaking

576
00:32:35,600 --> 00:32:40,080
Speaker 1: up gracefully. Uh Number one, always do it in person

577
00:32:40,400 --> 00:32:44,320
Speaker 1: and if possible, don't do it in public. So I

578
00:32:44,360 --> 00:32:46,720
Speaker 1: disagree with that. You might depend on who you're breaking

579
00:32:46,760 --> 00:32:49,360
Speaker 1: up with. You need some more people to see make

580
00:32:49,360 --> 00:32:54,440
Speaker 1: sure you safe. Right, she might get ugly. I'm flipping

581
00:32:54,440 --> 00:32:56,600
Speaker 1: the table over for sure. I always want to do that.

582
00:32:56,840 --> 00:32:59,280
Speaker 1: I see my mama flipped well, I ain't see, but

583
00:32:59,400 --> 00:33:01,560
Speaker 1: people told me my mama flipped the table over at

584
00:33:01,560 --> 00:33:06,760
Speaker 1: the at the eye. Yeah, I love it, man. I

585
00:33:06,800 --> 00:33:09,040
Speaker 1: want to do that so bad. I want to flip

586
00:33:09,040 --> 00:33:11,640
Speaker 1: the table and take my forearm and sweep all the

587
00:33:11,640 --> 00:33:13,840
Speaker 1: ship off the table at the same time too, Like

588
00:33:13,920 --> 00:33:15,880
Speaker 1: sweep all the ship and then we book that table

589
00:33:15,920 --> 00:33:18,960
Speaker 1: over and then kick sweep that nigg that's toxic. Don't

590
00:33:18,960 --> 00:33:21,600
Speaker 1: do that in the middle of the number two, in

591
00:33:21,640 --> 00:33:24,480
Speaker 1: the middle of a sentence. Don't listen to that. You're

592
00:33:24,520 --> 00:33:26,479
Speaker 1: gonna be in jail. My mom, they said, my mom

593
00:33:26,480 --> 00:33:28,400
Speaker 1: almost went to jail, but she knew the officer and

594
00:33:28,400 --> 00:33:34,719
Speaker 1: they let it go. Number two, never make a scene

595
00:33:35,120 --> 00:33:38,440
Speaker 1: and keep your bad ship to a minimum. See look.

596
00:33:39,000 --> 00:33:42,520
Speaker 1: Number two is to follow up with number one, and

597
00:33:42,560 --> 00:33:44,280
Speaker 1: I might have to take that out because my mama

598
00:33:44,280 --> 00:33:45,840
Speaker 1: got a whole career. She might be mad at me

599
00:33:45,880 --> 00:33:53,320
Speaker 1: for telling y'all that. Ah uh. Number three, do not

600
00:33:53,440 --> 00:33:59,080
Speaker 1: try to make the other person feel better. Mhmm. That's interesting.

601
00:34:00,120 --> 00:34:04,640
Speaker 1: M hmm. Like it's not you as me kind of situation, right,

602
00:34:04,880 --> 00:34:06,719
Speaker 1: That's that's probably what it sounds. So it says this

603
00:34:06,800 --> 00:34:11,279
Speaker 1: goes particularly with the dumper, um Q Beavis and butt

604
00:34:11,320 --> 00:34:15,760
Speaker 1: head laugh. Whatever that means. Once the relationship is severed,

605
00:34:15,800 --> 00:34:18,960
Speaker 1: the other person's emotions are no longer your responsibility. And

606
00:34:19,040 --> 00:34:21,440
Speaker 1: not only is it no longer your responsibility to help

607
00:34:21,480 --> 00:34:26,200
Speaker 1: them cope, but comforting them like excuse me, but comforting

608
00:34:26,239 --> 00:34:29,839
Speaker 1: them will likely make them feel worse. It can also backfire,

609
00:34:30,360 --> 00:34:32,799
Speaker 1: and that it will just make them resent you more

610
00:34:32,960 --> 00:34:36,719
Speaker 1: for being so nice while dumping them. Okay, I understand that.

611
00:34:38,160 --> 00:34:42,520
Speaker 1: And for fox sakes, it says don't have sex with them. Yeah,

612
00:34:42,560 --> 00:34:45,520
Speaker 1: because you're all emotional, sometimes you might end up having

613
00:34:45,560 --> 00:34:50,960
Speaker 1: sex right before a break like one last time. That

614
00:34:51,080 --> 00:34:53,080
Speaker 1: mean niggas, you break up with them and they're like, man,

615
00:34:53,120 --> 00:34:54,520
Speaker 1: just come over here and talk to me face to

616
00:34:54,560 --> 00:34:58,440
Speaker 1: face about it. No, stay your ass, don't go on,

617
00:34:58,440 --> 00:35:00,120
Speaker 1: no clothes set and what? No, man, you'll are you

618
00:35:00,200 --> 00:35:02,120
Speaker 1: trying to break up where you're gonna get fucked and

619
00:35:02,120 --> 00:35:04,120
Speaker 1: you're gonna be back there for another year too? Are

620
00:35:04,160 --> 00:35:08,160
Speaker 1: beat up? One of two? All right after the breakup,

621
00:35:08,440 --> 00:35:11,680
Speaker 1: respectfully cut all contact for a short period of time,

622
00:35:12,200 --> 00:35:16,680
Speaker 1: at least a short period of time. Yeah, because it

623
00:35:16,760 --> 00:35:18,719
Speaker 1: won't be over. If you break up with them and

624
00:35:18,719 --> 00:35:23,080
Speaker 1: you continue to communicate, it won't be over. That's my problem.

625
00:35:23,160 --> 00:35:24,839
Speaker 1: So it says this is the second thing that many

626
00:35:24,840 --> 00:35:26,719
Speaker 1: people don't muster the courage to do. A lot of

627
00:35:26,719 --> 00:35:29,840
Speaker 1: people get hung up on remaining friends and actually forced

628
00:35:29,880 --> 00:35:32,960
Speaker 1: contact when it when it's causing them more emotional stress.

629
00:35:33,560 --> 00:35:37,240
Speaker 1: Research and relationship breakups finds that people who limit contact

630
00:35:37,320 --> 00:35:40,399
Speaker 1: with one another emotionally recover much faster. So I did

631
00:35:40,440 --> 00:35:43,240
Speaker 1: do that. So I blocked my ex for six months,

632
00:35:45,160 --> 00:35:48,640
Speaker 1: and when the block expired on Verizon, I had to

633
00:35:48,680 --> 00:35:50,640
Speaker 1: block him on all social media all that ship. When

634
00:35:50,640 --> 00:35:52,759
Speaker 1: he was finally was able to contact my phone again

635
00:35:52,800 --> 00:35:54,880
Speaker 1: because I guess he was still trying. A matter of fact, no,

636
00:35:54,960 --> 00:35:58,120
Speaker 1: because he was still message through our business page on

637
00:35:58,200 --> 00:36:04,680
Speaker 1: the motherfucking podcast page. But I feel like I thought,

638
00:36:05,600 --> 00:36:08,399
Speaker 1: up until like a week ago or two weeks ago,

639
00:36:08,480 --> 00:36:12,640
Speaker 1: I thought we could like at least still communicate periodically.

640
00:36:12,640 --> 00:36:15,000
Speaker 1: Now I'm just like, I have a real live disdain

641
00:36:15,120 --> 00:36:19,520
Speaker 1: family a little bit. So I'm like, nigger, I don't

642
00:36:19,520 --> 00:36:22,120
Speaker 1: even want to be your friend. I don't. I'm not

643
00:36:22,239 --> 00:36:25,120
Speaker 1: your friend. I'm not your friend, Like it's impossible to

644
00:36:25,160 --> 00:36:28,719
Speaker 1: be some some people. Man, it's kind of I broke

645
00:36:28,800 --> 00:36:30,480
Speaker 1: up with him because I didn't like him as a person,

646
00:36:31,680 --> 00:36:33,399
Speaker 1: So how are you gonna be my friend? Yeah, that's

647
00:36:33,440 --> 00:36:37,359
Speaker 1: why you just gotta in all contact, honestly. Number five

648
00:36:37,760 --> 00:36:41,360
Speaker 1: talk to somebody about it. A J went to a therapist.

649
00:36:41,760 --> 00:36:49,680
Speaker 1: I typically go to a J like I'd be having

650
00:36:49,680 --> 00:36:51,400
Speaker 1: all the right answers for people, but not of my

651
00:36:51,440 --> 00:36:55,240
Speaker 1: mother for yourself. They say, this one may seem obvious,

652
00:36:55,360 --> 00:36:57,960
Speaker 1: but make sure you do you do it if this

653
00:36:58,040 --> 00:37:01,360
Speaker 1: is a particularly serious relationship, to talk to a trusted

654
00:37:01,480 --> 00:37:04,719
Speaker 1: friend or family member before making the decision, and then

655
00:37:04,840 --> 00:37:07,960
Speaker 1: take whatever advice they give you. Seriously, we are often

656
00:37:08,040 --> 00:37:11,200
Speaker 1: poor observers of our own relationships, but our friends can

657
00:37:11,239 --> 00:37:13,479
Speaker 1: see how it's affecting us better than we can see

658
00:37:13,480 --> 00:37:16,520
Speaker 1: for ourselves. Yeah, and you know what I also need

659
00:37:16,560 --> 00:37:18,640
Speaker 1: to work on, like when somebody is giving me like

660
00:37:18,719 --> 00:37:22,799
Speaker 1: there um, because you know, when you're in a relationship,

661
00:37:22,920 --> 00:37:26,120
Speaker 1: you know all the ins and outs of your relationship,

662
00:37:26,160 --> 00:37:29,799
Speaker 1: and it's oftentimes we do share the worstship about our

663
00:37:29,880 --> 00:37:33,480
Speaker 1: partner and none of the good. So then now when

664
00:37:33,520 --> 00:37:35,919
Speaker 1: you're telling your friend you're offloading what you're going through

665
00:37:35,920 --> 00:37:38,360
Speaker 1: with this person, or you know you're contemplating breaking up

666
00:37:38,400 --> 00:37:42,160
Speaker 1: with them, and your friend is like, you know, talking

667
00:37:42,200 --> 00:37:44,560
Speaker 1: shit about the person, it's kind of like it's to me,

668
00:37:44,840 --> 00:37:47,359
Speaker 1: it was always like uneasy, like yeah, I know I'm

669
00:37:47,400 --> 00:37:49,879
Speaker 1: talking about this nigga with you, but I don't really

670
00:37:49,920 --> 00:37:53,319
Speaker 1: like you talking about him because I know the other

671
00:37:53,360 --> 00:37:55,799
Speaker 1: part of him, which is why I kept staying with right,

672
00:37:56,280 --> 00:37:57,759
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. But that's the part that

673
00:37:57,800 --> 00:38:02,200
Speaker 1: you forget to tell your friends because those things are fleeting.

674
00:38:02,640 --> 00:38:06,600
Speaker 1: It's the mean, hurtful things that stay with you the most. Yeah,

675
00:38:06,800 --> 00:38:10,640
Speaker 1: would be like that, unless it's like always good, then

676
00:38:10,640 --> 00:38:13,160
Speaker 1: it's always good stuff to talk about, but that's not

677
00:38:13,239 --> 00:38:18,280
Speaker 1: real life. Number six, Allow yourself to be sad, angry, upset,

678
00:38:18,400 --> 00:38:21,799
Speaker 1: but don't judge or blame anyone. It says emotions are

679
00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:25,320
Speaker 1: healthy and normal, even negative emotions are healthy and normal.

680
00:38:25,560 --> 00:38:28,399
Speaker 1: But judging and blaming people, whether it's them or you,

681
00:38:28,719 --> 00:38:33,200
Speaker 1: doesn't get you very far. That's true. So so that's

682
00:38:33,200 --> 00:38:36,800
Speaker 1: where accountability comes in there. Yeah, I'd be quick to

683
00:38:36,880 --> 00:38:43,000
Speaker 1: blame you. You you you you Yeah yeah yeah, um,

684
00:38:43,040 --> 00:38:46,319
Speaker 1: because you know when people say, oh, you're responsible for

685
00:38:46,360 --> 00:38:49,319
Speaker 1: your own happiness, I understand that. But if somebody can

686
00:38:49,360 --> 00:38:51,480
Speaker 1: make you unhappy, they also have the power to make

687
00:38:51,520 --> 00:38:56,200
Speaker 1: you happy. Right, So if you're intentionally making me unhappy

688
00:38:56,239 --> 00:38:59,279
Speaker 1: in a relationship, or it may not be intentional in

689
00:38:59,320 --> 00:39:01,600
Speaker 1: their minds, but if you're doing a bunch of dumb

690
00:39:01,600 --> 00:39:04,120
Speaker 1: ship on a daily basis, like I'm going to be

691
00:39:04,200 --> 00:39:08,560
Speaker 1: falling out of love with you, like that's just yeah.

692
00:39:08,680 --> 00:39:12,319
Speaker 1: So um, I don't know, I don't know about that one.

693
00:39:13,280 --> 00:39:16,200
Speaker 1: To to not blame somebody, it's kind of hard because

694
00:39:17,280 --> 00:39:19,640
Speaker 1: why you you would still be with them? I mean,

695
00:39:19,680 --> 00:39:22,439
Speaker 1: I understand you gotta blame you know, blame yourself, take accountability,

696
00:39:22,560 --> 00:39:26,360
Speaker 1: not blame yourself, but take accountability for the relationship in

697
00:39:26,440 --> 00:39:30,399
Speaker 1: your part and what's transpiring in the relationship. But it's

698
00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:32,880
Speaker 1: kind of hard. It's kind of hard not to point

699
00:39:32,920 --> 00:39:40,320
Speaker 1: out all right. Number seven, recognize that the breakup itself

700
00:39:40,360 --> 00:39:44,439
Speaker 1: is a sign of your incompatibility and you're both better off.

701
00:39:45,600 --> 00:39:49,399
Speaker 1: Mm hmmm, hows somebody better without me? I don't understand that. One.

702
00:39:50,760 --> 00:39:52,719
Speaker 1: Sometimes you could be a great person. They can be

703
00:39:52,760 --> 00:39:54,719
Speaker 1: a great person, but you're not great together. Y'all don't

704
00:39:54,760 --> 00:39:57,240
Speaker 1: bring out the best in each other. And that's another

705
00:39:57,280 --> 00:39:58,759
Speaker 1: thing I would tell my ex, like, you can be

706
00:39:58,760 --> 00:40:01,040
Speaker 1: an amazing purpose person it for somebody else, Like, we

707
00:40:01,160 --> 00:40:03,120
Speaker 1: both got all these great qualities, but we do not

708
00:40:03,239 --> 00:40:05,399
Speaker 1: bring out the best in each other. We don't. Yeah,

709
00:40:05,440 --> 00:40:08,000
Speaker 1: but I just it makes me feel better to think

710
00:40:08,120 --> 00:40:12,480
Speaker 1: that they're not better. Well, I always be like Nick,

711
00:40:12,520 --> 00:40:14,960
Speaker 1: it's it's just it's just one me. You're gonna look

712
00:40:15,000 --> 00:40:17,160
Speaker 1: for me and somebody else and you're gonna never find me.

713
00:40:17,400 --> 00:40:18,920
Speaker 1: I do be on that type of time because I

714
00:40:18,920 --> 00:40:21,480
Speaker 1: really feel that way about me. I know I'm amazing too,

715
00:40:21,880 --> 00:40:26,319
Speaker 1: but no, I'm that narcissistic to believe that nobody else would.

716
00:40:26,520 --> 00:40:28,440
Speaker 1: I just like to it makes me feel better to

717
00:40:28,520 --> 00:40:31,120
Speaker 1: feel like I'm the best thing that ever happened to

718
00:40:31,160 --> 00:40:38,279
Speaker 1: them in life. It's kind of narcissistic, but it's fucking real, Like, yeah,

719
00:40:38,400 --> 00:40:40,760
Speaker 1: you can. I believe there's only like a few different

720
00:40:40,800 --> 00:40:43,759
Speaker 1: characteristics of people, right, and you should be able to

721
00:40:43,760 --> 00:40:47,759
Speaker 1: find those characteristics and multiple people, but there is still

722
00:40:47,800 --> 00:40:50,800
Speaker 1: gonna be some uniqueness about this one person in particular.

723
00:40:52,880 --> 00:40:56,680
Speaker 1: Number eight investing yourself. This is a good one. The

724
00:40:56,719 --> 00:40:59,799
Speaker 1: longer you're spending in a romantic relationship, the more you're

725
00:41:00,000 --> 00:41:03,840
Speaker 1: into identity males with theirs. Being together with someone in

726
00:41:03,880 --> 00:41:06,440
Speaker 1: such an intimate space for so long creates a third,

727
00:41:06,800 --> 00:41:12,919
Speaker 1: overlapping psychological entity that comprised comprises both you and them,

728
00:41:13,000 --> 00:41:16,360
Speaker 1: and when that entity suddenly dies, not only is it painful,

729
00:41:16,560 --> 00:41:19,160
Speaker 1: but it leaves a temporary void in who you are.

730
00:41:19,920 --> 00:41:23,600
Speaker 1: So you gotta find yourself again, basically, find your own

731
00:41:23,600 --> 00:41:29,000
Speaker 1: individual identity and celebrate it. That's why I always say

732
00:41:29,200 --> 00:41:31,879
Speaker 1: you gotta be independent in the union. You don't want

733
00:41:31,880 --> 00:41:34,400
Speaker 1: to lose yourself and nobody. Yes, y'all are supposed to

734
00:41:34,400 --> 00:41:37,799
Speaker 1: grow together and do things together, but you should never

735
00:41:37,840 --> 00:41:41,000
Speaker 1: be in a relationship where you're being consumed by the

736
00:41:41,040 --> 00:41:44,400
Speaker 1: other person. So where you no longer having having a

737
00:41:44,560 --> 00:41:47,920
Speaker 1: u an identity. And it says like friendship is the

738
00:41:47,960 --> 00:41:51,919
Speaker 1: best medicine for heartbreak. So you know, you fall back

739
00:41:51,960 --> 00:41:54,080
Speaker 1: on the people, your home girls and your loved ones

740
00:41:54,160 --> 00:41:57,000
Speaker 1: to help you remember who you are as an individual,

741
00:41:57,360 --> 00:41:59,960
Speaker 1: because those are the people who know you as an individual.

742
00:42:00,080 --> 00:42:03,799
Speaker 1: You know exactly number nine. Only start dating again when

743
00:42:03,800 --> 00:42:08,359
Speaker 1: you're legitimately excited to see new people a lot. So

744
00:42:08,360 --> 00:42:10,000
Speaker 1: it says a lot of people break up and enter

745
00:42:10,080 --> 00:42:13,000
Speaker 1: a rebound period there immediately back on the market and

746
00:42:13,080 --> 00:42:15,520
Speaker 1: throwing themselves at the first thing that comes by. The

747
00:42:15,600 --> 00:42:19,040
Speaker 1: problem is this is more of a coping mechanism than

748
00:42:19,120 --> 00:42:25,000
Speaker 1: genuine enthusiasm for new people, for meeting new people. So

749
00:42:25,040 --> 00:42:27,640
Speaker 1: I agree with that, you know how and don't heal.

750
00:42:28,719 --> 00:42:32,239
Speaker 1: We already said that several times in several different episodes.

751
00:42:32,840 --> 00:42:35,800
Speaker 1: So they always say the best way over somebody is

752
00:42:35,880 --> 00:42:38,120
Speaker 1: under somebody else. But that's not true. You gotta take

753
00:42:38,160 --> 00:42:40,520
Speaker 1: some time. It's gone dates. We gotta learn the date.

754
00:42:40,520 --> 00:42:42,880
Speaker 1: We're gonna do an episode on that too. Black women dating,

755
00:42:43,000 --> 00:42:44,680
Speaker 1: Just date? What is it? What does it look like?

756
00:42:45,000 --> 00:42:48,200
Speaker 1: Just date? Like date multiple people like? I like first dates,

757
00:42:48,840 --> 00:42:51,520
Speaker 1: I like meeting new people. I like talking to new

758
00:42:51,560 --> 00:42:54,560
Speaker 1: people and learning about them and ship like right, So yeah,

759
00:42:54,640 --> 00:42:56,640
Speaker 1: just trying to not the fun, right, that's the thing.

760
00:42:57,120 --> 00:43:00,600
Speaker 1: You don't have the funk everybody you date. You fun

761
00:43:00,719 --> 00:43:03,800
Speaker 1: everybody you date, and you especially shouldn't have a baby

762
00:43:03,840 --> 00:43:06,400
Speaker 1: by every boyfriend. But that's a different conversation, all right.

763
00:43:07,000 --> 00:43:10,080
Speaker 1: Number ten, Only attempt to be friends with your ex

764
00:43:10,080 --> 00:43:15,160
Speaker 1: again once you're over the idea of dating them. M hmm. Yeah.

765
00:43:15,280 --> 00:43:19,000
Speaker 1: Some people have the admiral admirballe goal of remaining friends

766
00:43:19,000 --> 00:43:21,160
Speaker 1: with their ex. Other people have the admiral goal of

767
00:43:21,239 --> 00:43:24,080
Speaker 1: breaking the breaking their knee caps of their breaking the

768
00:43:24,120 --> 00:43:29,399
Speaker 1: knee caps of their ex with the tire, right can

769
00:43:29,480 --> 00:43:31,640
Speaker 1: you as a woman? I feel like men can do it?

770
00:43:31,680 --> 00:43:33,560
Speaker 1: But as a woman, it's like when you get into

771
00:43:33,560 --> 00:43:35,719
Speaker 1: a relationship with a new person, they don't want to

772
00:43:35,760 --> 00:43:38,680
Speaker 1: know that you're stow in communication with your ex like that, Like,

773
00:43:38,880 --> 00:43:40,880
Speaker 1: how how are you going to be making space for

774
00:43:40,960 --> 00:43:46,440
Speaker 1: a new um experiences experiencing new people. If you're holding

775
00:43:46,520 --> 00:43:49,560
Speaker 1: on to this friendship relationship with somebody else, it has

776
00:43:49,560 --> 00:43:52,840
Speaker 1: to be like a if it's an actual person you

777
00:43:52,880 --> 00:43:55,000
Speaker 1: were in a relationship with, it has to be a

778
00:43:55,080 --> 00:43:58,120
Speaker 1: big gass time gap. I believe I say, five years

779
00:43:58,760 --> 00:44:02,319
Speaker 1: before I could be your friend, do right? You know

780
00:44:02,360 --> 00:44:04,680
Speaker 1: what I do? Like, I'm still cool. I don't think

781
00:44:04,719 --> 00:44:09,040
Speaker 1: I have an X that I'm not cool with in

782
00:44:09,160 --> 00:44:11,600
Speaker 1: some form of fashion, because you know, i'd be having

783
00:44:11,600 --> 00:44:13,360
Speaker 1: a good time. My funny niggas like to laugh. I

784
00:44:13,440 --> 00:44:17,680
Speaker 1: like to laugh. So if it, if it didn't end horribly,

785
00:44:18,520 --> 00:44:20,719
Speaker 1: I'm pretty much still cool with your ass. But you

786
00:44:20,719 --> 00:44:24,680
Speaker 1: can't get no more pussy um exactly, and that's okay.

787
00:44:24,760 --> 00:44:28,759
Speaker 1: So we went we posted on our Instagram page and

788
00:44:28,760 --> 00:44:34,040
Speaker 1: we asked, y'all, what how do y'all break up with people? Yeah,

789
00:44:34,080 --> 00:44:36,000
Speaker 1: we want to read a couple of them. Somebody just

790
00:44:36,480 --> 00:44:39,080
Speaker 1: responded it was like one more time, like applies. So

791
00:44:39,520 --> 00:44:43,400
Speaker 1: b V I think it's like balanced b V lanced said,

792
00:44:43,520 --> 00:44:52,320
Speaker 1: like applies one more time? Uh k, car mona she said,

793
00:44:52,960 --> 00:44:55,400
Speaker 1: or he said, I can't tell by the avatar, but

794
00:44:55,520 --> 00:45:01,600
Speaker 1: just as ignore them, just completely ignore them. Good. Yes,

795
00:45:02,120 --> 00:45:06,400
Speaker 1: this is my friend out the de Leon Daily on

796
00:45:06,640 --> 00:45:09,000
Speaker 1: he says, getting straight to the point but with respect

797
00:45:09,040 --> 00:45:12,719
Speaker 1: and clear communication sounds good. That's healthy if you can

798
00:45:12,800 --> 00:45:17,240
Speaker 1: really do it that way, right. Jules Vega O seven

799
00:45:17,280 --> 00:45:21,279
Speaker 1: says over dinner, you're gonna give feet up one more

800
00:45:21,320 --> 00:45:24,600
Speaker 1: time and then be like, yeah, are you fool? Did

801
00:45:24,680 --> 00:45:28,200
Speaker 1: you enjoy your bill? Guess what? That's the last one

802
00:45:28,200 --> 00:45:36,279
Speaker 1: you getting out of goods? Shame, that's a relationship, is

803
00:45:37,360 --> 00:45:42,000
Speaker 1: stomach fool relationship? Empty pink Prince Princess says, I just

804
00:45:42,040 --> 00:45:44,680
Speaker 1: stopped responding. It looks like a lot of people are

805
00:45:44,719 --> 00:45:52,000
Speaker 1: just ghost Anissa Duck says face to face that's how

806
00:45:52,040 --> 00:46:00,640
Speaker 1: after Brown says, after sex, damn shame, a silent escape.

807
00:46:01,440 --> 00:46:05,600
Speaker 1: We both know what happened without saying anything. This is quasi. No,

808
00:46:05,760 --> 00:46:07,439
Speaker 1: I don't say it. I know who that is. Don't

809
00:46:07,480 --> 00:46:15,120
Speaker 1: say m hm like she hit me up. But she

810
00:46:15,200 --> 00:46:18,760
Speaker 1: was like I just commented on y'all, y'all story question,

811
00:46:18,840 --> 00:46:20,560
Speaker 1: but don't say my name just in case. So it's

812
00:46:20,560 --> 00:46:26,560
Speaker 1: so listening, Okay, well listen, I'm telling everybody name. What's

813
00:46:26,560 --> 00:46:29,200
Speaker 1: there on one people? No, no, we just said this

814
00:46:29,239 --> 00:46:34,399
Speaker 1: was an anonymous question, right. Someone said, sorry for what podcasts?

815
00:46:34,440 --> 00:46:37,279
Speaker 1: Thank you all for following. This is text. I'm not

816
00:46:37,320 --> 00:46:39,759
Speaker 1: trying to talk about ship face to face because stay

817
00:46:39,800 --> 00:46:49,400
Speaker 1: out my face for real. So g Uh in the

818
00:46:49,440 --> 00:46:51,520
Speaker 1: middle says, I don't know how to break up with

819
00:46:51,600 --> 00:46:54,360
Speaker 1: people actually in this situation right now, girls said us

820
00:46:54,360 --> 00:46:57,000
Speaker 1: a dumb, big story. We'll help you break up. I

821
00:46:57,080 --> 00:46:59,720
Speaker 1: had a therapist. I'll give you that disclaimer before we start,

822
00:47:00,200 --> 00:47:04,680
Speaker 1: but I help you. I don't think that. I think

823
00:47:04,719 --> 00:47:06,839
Speaker 1: ghosting is cool when it's mutual, like you'll both just

824
00:47:06,880 --> 00:47:10,040
Speaker 1: fall out of contact, but that that doesn't really happen

825
00:47:10,200 --> 00:47:14,479
Speaker 1: in um, actual committed relationships. These some of these things

826
00:47:14,480 --> 00:47:16,400
Speaker 1: like ghosting and ship like that, that's far more of

827
00:47:16,440 --> 00:47:20,040
Speaker 1: like a hook up situation ship situations. I don't think

828
00:47:20,080 --> 00:47:22,680
Speaker 1: that somebody you've been in a relationship with a five years,

829
00:47:23,160 --> 00:47:25,160
Speaker 1: you're just gonna go st that nick and not answer

830
00:47:25,160 --> 00:47:27,920
Speaker 1: the phone for him no more. That's not really realistic,

831
00:47:28,040 --> 00:47:30,440
Speaker 1: Like how do you actually break up with people? I

832
00:47:30,440 --> 00:47:33,320
Speaker 1: think the list that we gave is a real good

833
00:47:33,440 --> 00:47:37,120
Speaker 1: um starting point. But I do think with somebody you're

834
00:47:37,120 --> 00:47:41,040
Speaker 1: in a committed relationship with face to face, even over

835
00:47:41,080 --> 00:47:43,520
Speaker 1: the phone, maybe you gotta write them a teen page

836
00:47:43,600 --> 00:47:49,640
Speaker 1: letter whatever it is, but you do a little bit

837
00:47:49,680 --> 00:47:53,640
Speaker 1: more old than some type of explanation or I don't know.

838
00:47:53,680 --> 00:47:56,200
Speaker 1: When I broke up with my ex, I literally had

839
00:47:56,280 --> 00:48:00,960
Speaker 1: written in a journal every day eating up to the breakup,

840
00:48:01,719 --> 00:48:04,600
Speaker 1: so that, for one, it was really to remind myself

841
00:48:04,640 --> 00:48:07,520
Speaker 1: as to why I was breaking up with him, and

842
00:48:07,560 --> 00:48:09,840
Speaker 1: also if he wanted to know the exact reasons, I

843
00:48:09,880 --> 00:48:15,160
Speaker 1: had them ship listed in a real fucking way for

844
00:48:15,200 --> 00:48:19,680
Speaker 1: the breakup. So I don't know, these these responses are

845
00:48:19,719 --> 00:48:23,399
Speaker 1: really for hookups, right, y'all. Ain't just got nigga yap

846
00:48:23,400 --> 00:48:26,799
Speaker 1: in a relationship with for a while That should be

847
00:48:26,880 --> 00:48:28,759
Speaker 1: long and drawing out. It takes literally a year to

848
00:48:28,800 --> 00:48:31,160
Speaker 1: break up with somebody you've actually been in a relationship with.

849
00:48:32,080 --> 00:48:35,560
Speaker 1: I feel like it takes like a year. Yeah, if

850
00:48:35,600 --> 00:48:39,040
Speaker 1: you could cold turkey and nigger, you're a babbage. If

851
00:48:39,040 --> 00:48:41,239
Speaker 1: you can cold turkey somebody you've been with for like

852
00:48:41,480 --> 00:48:44,319
Speaker 1: two years plus, but didn't somebody's just come home and

853
00:48:44,400 --> 00:48:47,040
Speaker 1: find all everything gone like I feel like it was

854
00:48:47,080 --> 00:48:51,160
Speaker 1: on social media like care and all the ship was

855
00:48:51,239 --> 00:48:55,080
Speaker 1: just gone out of the house, no conversation. That's cold

856
00:48:55,080 --> 00:48:58,560
Speaker 1: blooded right there. Yes, yes, And you know, if somebody

857
00:48:58,600 --> 00:49:03,000
Speaker 1: were to do me like that, I stress about little things.

858
00:49:03,440 --> 00:49:05,279
Speaker 1: I don't stress about big ship. What could I do

859
00:49:05,320 --> 00:49:08,120
Speaker 1: in that situation but move the No, that would definitely.

860
00:49:08,320 --> 00:49:11,200
Speaker 1: I can't believe this nigga took the TVs. I can't

861
00:49:11,200 --> 00:49:13,839
Speaker 1: even watch being the new episode came on the night.

862
00:49:14,400 --> 00:49:16,399
Speaker 1: The only reason why you probably feel a ways because

863
00:49:16,400 --> 00:49:19,719
Speaker 1: you ain't did it first. He got one up on

864
00:49:19,760 --> 00:49:22,560
Speaker 1: your ass is really the person who needs like the closure,

865
00:49:22,600 --> 00:49:25,640
Speaker 1: who's stressing the most about the breakup, and they probably

866
00:49:25,680 --> 00:49:28,880
Speaker 1: contemplated breaking up too, But when you're being broken up

867
00:49:28,920 --> 00:49:33,480
Speaker 1: with is more devastating, especially for women. I think, yeah,

868
00:49:33,560 --> 00:49:36,759
Speaker 1: because women aren't used to that type of They're not

869
00:49:36,920 --> 00:49:39,120
Speaker 1: used to rejection in that way. So I don't know,

870
00:49:39,200 --> 00:49:42,280
Speaker 1: being adult, I guess that's the gist of this episode,

871
00:49:42,280 --> 00:49:44,840
Speaker 1: being an adult, being an adult and have the hard,

872
00:49:44,960 --> 00:49:49,000
Speaker 1: tough conversations with yourself and the people you once loved.

873
00:49:50,239 --> 00:49:54,040
Speaker 1: They deserve that much, at least at the bare minimum,

874
00:49:54,160 --> 00:49:56,439
Speaker 1: unless they talx is in they're beating your ass, then

875
00:49:56,520 --> 00:49:58,480
Speaker 1: I it's okay to go stim and get up out

876
00:49:58,480 --> 00:50:00,399
Speaker 1: of there. That's the only time I feel like it's

877
00:50:00,440 --> 00:50:05,239
Speaker 1: okay to just ghost to motherfucker's just when it's if

878
00:50:05,280 --> 00:50:07,600
Speaker 1: your life depends on when you're in an enough situation

879
00:50:07,640 --> 00:50:09,680
Speaker 1: in you j low get the funk up out of there,

880
00:50:10,680 --> 00:50:15,200
Speaker 1: right So anyway, that's I mean, I guess this h

881
00:50:15,239 --> 00:50:19,640
Speaker 1: I hope this episode gives you, guys, um some better

882
00:50:19,640 --> 00:50:22,240
Speaker 1: ways to break up, because I know it's somebody listening

883
00:50:22,320 --> 00:50:24,200
Speaker 1: right now that this is suching your spirit that you

884
00:50:24,239 --> 00:50:27,080
Speaker 1: need to break up with that person today. Don't wait,

885
00:50:27,640 --> 00:50:30,919
Speaker 1: do it today, right, don't wait till the next new year,

886
00:50:31,360 --> 00:50:34,800
Speaker 1: or maybe wait at till you know that's bad advice.

887
00:50:35,000 --> 00:50:36,800
Speaker 1: I'm about to say, at least wait till after Vamion

888
00:50:36,880 --> 00:50:41,160
Speaker 1: Time's day. But you toxy on it. I'm just joking.

889
00:50:41,280 --> 00:50:45,160
Speaker 1: Don't wait. No, she ain't joking. She ain't joking at all.

890
00:50:45,640 --> 00:50:48,520
Speaker 1: But listen, guys, we hope you enjoyed this episode. Tune

891
00:50:48,520 --> 00:50:50,880
Speaker 1: in every Thursday on your I Heart Radio Apple wherever

892
00:50:50,880 --> 00:50:53,200
Speaker 1: the fun you get your podcast at. This is your

893
00:50:53,239 --> 00:50:56,040
Speaker 1: co host A j Holiday two point Oh. Y'all follow

894
00:50:56,080 --> 00:50:59,480
Speaker 1: me on Instagram? Did you you tell them the website?

895
00:51:00,160 --> 00:51:03,279
Speaker 1: They know what I mean? Www that we talked back

896
00:51:03,560 --> 00:51:07,680
Speaker 1: Anti dot Kazam. All right, y'all's me official tam Bam.

897
00:51:07,760 --> 00:51:09,919
Speaker 1: Once again. I love y'all, and I really appreciate y'all

898
00:51:09,960 --> 00:51:13,160
Speaker 1: for tuning in and listen to share our truth unapologetically

899
00:51:13,280 --> 00:51:15,680
Speaker 1: every week with y'all. So y'all come back and see us.

900
00:51:15,719 --> 00:51:18,560
Speaker 1: Follow me on Instagram. I'm official tam BAM. Remember to

901
00:51:18,600 --> 00:51:23,440
Speaker 1: speak now and never hold your peace by