1 00:00:00,760 --> 00:00:04,400 Speaker 1: Ridiculous Crime. It's a production of I Heart Radio, Zarin. 2 00:00:04,480 --> 00:00:09,200 Speaker 1: You know what's ridiculous? Yes? Did you know only nineteen 3 00:00:09,360 --> 00:00:13,240 Speaker 1: authors sold more new books last year than Matthew McConaughey. 4 00:00:13,600 --> 00:00:19,720 Speaker 1: He was twenty for the year. Ridiculous, Just ridiculous. Matthew McConaughey, Yeah, 5 00:00:19,760 --> 00:00:22,800 Speaker 1: he was the most. He sold more books, more new 6 00:00:22,880 --> 00:00:26,920 Speaker 1: books last year than all but nineteen professional writers and authors. 7 00:00:27,000 --> 00:00:30,000 Speaker 1: That's completely ridiculous. Just go figure. Well, you know what 8 00:00:30,040 --> 00:00:33,200 Speaker 1: else is ridiculous? No blay it on me getting so 9 00:00:33,400 --> 00:00:36,279 Speaker 1: blotted that you need to be forcibly removed from your 10 00:00:36,320 --> 00:00:41,239 Speaker 1: trash hotel room by armed soldiers. What I love this? 11 00:00:41,560 --> 00:01:03,800 Speaker 1: It sounds like some people I know. This is a 12 00:01:03,880 --> 00:01:08,480 Speaker 1: Ridiculous Crime, A podcast about absurd and outrageous capers, heists 13 00:01:08,520 --> 00:01:20,199 Speaker 1: and cons. It's always murder free and one ridiculous, Zaren. 14 00:01:20,760 --> 00:01:25,080 Speaker 1: What's your favorite Billy Idol song? Billy Idol the bleached 15 00:01:25,120 --> 00:01:30,440 Speaker 1: blonde rocker Let's see White Wedding because I'm a older brother, 16 00:01:30,600 --> 00:01:32,119 Speaker 1: you know, and I just love the opening of that. 17 00:01:32,240 --> 00:01:34,800 Speaker 1: It's got a crazy hook and there's wasn't it nice 18 00:01:34,920 --> 00:01:39,000 Speaker 1: day to start again? I'd always like that. Rebel yells 19 00:01:39,040 --> 00:01:44,600 Speaker 1: good one Cradle Love, although that video, oh man, is 20 00:01:44,640 --> 00:01:46,960 Speaker 1: a problem. It is not aged well. It is not 21 00:01:47,080 --> 00:01:49,680 Speaker 1: aged well. So I'll say not Cradle of Love, and 22 00:01:49,680 --> 00:01:53,000 Speaker 1: I will say White Wedding. What's your favorite Billy Idol song? Um? 23 00:01:53,040 --> 00:01:55,720 Speaker 1: I really like Ready Steady Go from when he was 24 00:01:55,760 --> 00:02:00,280 Speaker 1: in Generation X, kind of deep catch. Well you know, 25 00:02:00,440 --> 00:02:03,360 Speaker 1: I'm over here with the MTV hits and you're like, um, 26 00:02:03,480 --> 00:02:08,680 Speaker 1: b sides of the Japanese leg. It's a good song. 27 00:02:09,919 --> 00:02:13,120 Speaker 1: So we're talking Billy Idol. Right. I want you to 28 00:02:13,639 --> 00:02:21,200 Speaker 1: close your eyes, m Isaac and imagine Bangkok in the 29 00:02:21,280 --> 00:02:29,120 Speaker 1: fall of nineteen So amoys, so sultry. So imagine you're 30 00:02:29,160 --> 00:02:33,640 Speaker 1: staying at the Royal Orchids Sheraton. Can you picture yourself 31 00:02:33,639 --> 00:02:37,040 Speaker 1: doing that? What's you say for the sake of the story. Yes, yes, 32 00:02:37,639 --> 00:02:41,320 Speaker 1: it's lush, it's gorgeous. You're on the top floor of 33 00:02:41,320 --> 00:02:45,720 Speaker 1: the hotel. Your room overlooks this river. See, but you 34 00:02:45,760 --> 00:02:48,960 Speaker 1: hear a commotion down the hall. Now you've been hearing 35 00:02:49,120 --> 00:02:51,480 Speaker 1: a lot of stuff down the hall in your the 36 00:02:51,600 --> 00:02:56,760 Speaker 1: last week of your stay, yelling, smashing of glass, would 37 00:02:57,360 --> 00:03:00,720 Speaker 1: lots of shady ladies coming and going and by shady ladies. 38 00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:04,440 Speaker 1: Are we talking about professionals? Professionals You've called down to 39 00:03:04,480 --> 00:03:06,960 Speaker 1: the front desk a couple of times to complain. Of course, 40 00:03:07,000 --> 00:03:09,800 Speaker 1: sounds like, you know, by gum, I am paying a 41 00:03:09,800 --> 00:03:12,720 Speaker 1: lot of money for this room, and there's something going on. 42 00:03:12,760 --> 00:03:15,560 Speaker 1: There's some tomfoolery and horseplay going on down the hall. 43 00:03:15,720 --> 00:03:22,400 Speaker 1: I did not pay no shenanigans. Uh, they've apologized. Perhaps 44 00:03:22,400 --> 00:03:24,600 Speaker 1: they sent up a fruit basket. Oh that would have 45 00:03:24,639 --> 00:03:29,360 Speaker 1: been nice. Yeah, it's refreshing, um. But the rucks just persists. 46 00:03:29,880 --> 00:03:32,519 Speaker 1: And but today when you hear it sounds a little 47 00:03:32,560 --> 00:03:35,400 Speaker 1: bit different. So you opened the door to your room 48 00:03:35,440 --> 00:03:37,600 Speaker 1: and you peek down the hall and you see this 49 00:03:37,640 --> 00:03:43,200 Speaker 1: group of Thai soldiers. They have rifles bayonets on display, 50 00:03:43,320 --> 00:03:46,600 Speaker 1: and they're entering that nuisance room down the hall. Get 51 00:03:47,280 --> 00:03:51,480 Speaker 1: like so you're thinking, now it's you can't post this 52 00:03:51,560 --> 00:03:54,280 Speaker 1: on next door, but it's a good action. You can't 53 00:03:54,280 --> 00:03:59,480 Speaker 1: post it on citizen. The tie soldiers they enter the room, 54 00:03:59,520 --> 00:04:02,200 Speaker 1: but they have a nurse and some paramedics with them. 55 00:04:02,240 --> 00:04:06,800 Speaker 1: You're thinking, okay, this is getting intense. And they all 56 00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:09,560 Speaker 1: walk in and there's like a brief shuffle and then 57 00:04:09,600 --> 00:04:13,840 Speaker 1: the group comes out and they had their wheeling the 58 00:04:13,880 --> 00:04:16,960 Speaker 1: gurney and there's a passenger strap to this gurney totally 59 00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:20,000 Speaker 1: out cold like tongue lolling out of the side of 60 00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:22,679 Speaker 1: his mouth. You can see the top of his head. 61 00:04:23,200 --> 00:04:26,720 Speaker 1: It's a brushy mess of bleached blond spikes. What do 62 00:04:26,839 --> 00:04:41,040 Speaker 1: we have here, Billy Idol, You hotel guest, have just 63 00:04:41,120 --> 00:04:44,160 Speaker 1: witnessed Billy Idol's three week drug bender come to an 64 00:04:44,279 --> 00:04:47,680 Speaker 1: end at the hands of a tranquilizer wielding nurse and 65 00:04:47,920 --> 00:04:54,359 Speaker 1: the Thai Army. Three week long bend, three weeks, three weeks, 66 00:04:54,600 --> 00:04:57,440 Speaker 1: and that was the third hotel that he'd trashed in 67 00:04:57,760 --> 00:05:00,280 Speaker 1: as many weeks. In a minute, if you going to 68 00:05:00,400 --> 00:05:03,839 Speaker 1: do a three week vender and this is the third hotel, 69 00:05:04,040 --> 00:05:07,080 Speaker 1: think you're not doing this alone, are you? No? No, no, no, 70 00:05:07,200 --> 00:05:11,039 Speaker 1: See he's there with his friend. Billy Idol and his friend, 71 00:05:11,080 --> 00:05:14,040 Speaker 1: Harry Johnson went to Thailand to take a break from 72 00:05:14,080 --> 00:05:17,440 Speaker 1: recording the album Charmed Life. I'm sorry, you're gonna have 73 00:05:17,440 --> 00:05:18,840 Speaker 1: to back that up. Did you say his friend was 74 00:05:19,000 --> 00:05:24,920 Speaker 1: named Harry Johnson. Billy Idol and his Harry Johnson went 75 00:05:24,960 --> 00:05:28,520 Speaker 1: to Thailand and we're tearing up Thailand yeah, just going nuts. 76 00:05:29,240 --> 00:05:33,680 Speaker 1: Um what what kind of put this in motion? Is 77 00:05:33,720 --> 00:05:38,559 Speaker 1: that Billy Idol. He had a longtime girlfriend, Perry Lister. 78 00:05:39,279 --> 00:05:41,760 Speaker 1: They had a kid in they have like a year 79 00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:46,800 Speaker 1: old child, a babe in arms, and um. One day 80 00:05:46,839 --> 00:05:51,240 Speaker 1: Perry is at home and the baby monitors on. She's 81 00:05:51,320 --> 00:05:55,200 Speaker 1: listening to, you know, the sweet coups of Baby Idol, 82 00:05:56,080 --> 00:06:00,039 Speaker 1: and then she overhears a phone conversation that Billy I 83 00:06:00,440 --> 00:06:03,479 Speaker 1: is having with another woman. Wait a minute, so Billy 84 00:06:03,520 --> 00:06:06,280 Speaker 1: is on the phone in the baby's room talking to 85 00:06:06,320 --> 00:06:08,400 Speaker 1: another one. I don't know if he was at the baby. 86 00:06:08,400 --> 00:06:12,520 Speaker 1: He's like, let me go somewhere private in the nursery 87 00:06:12,640 --> 00:06:15,000 Speaker 1: or if you know those sometimes, like the older baby 88 00:06:15,040 --> 00:06:17,680 Speaker 1: monitors back in those days, like would pick up frequencies 89 00:06:17,720 --> 00:06:21,520 Speaker 1: like maybe he was on the cordless phone. But what's 90 00:06:21,560 --> 00:06:25,960 Speaker 1: he talking about with the with his other woman their 91 00:06:26,080 --> 00:06:30,760 Speaker 1: new baby. Yeah, he doubled up. So he's got an 92 00:06:30,800 --> 00:06:33,640 Speaker 1: eight eight and an eight nine baby, like Irish twins, 93 00:06:33,640 --> 00:06:38,479 Speaker 1: but different women women. So Perry is like, obviously not 94 00:06:38,640 --> 00:06:42,360 Speaker 1: okay with this, and so she takes the baby and leaves. 95 00:06:42,680 --> 00:06:46,480 Speaker 1: He's heartbroken, Billy, because he wants it all, but he's 96 00:06:46,520 --> 00:06:50,520 Speaker 1: got a backup baby, Harry Johnson. He's got a backup baby, 97 00:06:53,080 --> 00:06:56,760 Speaker 1: one of the two. So but Harry's like, it's okay, Billy, 98 00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:59,040 Speaker 1: you know what, you know what, we need to get 99 00:06:59,080 --> 00:07:02,280 Speaker 1: your mind off of you carousing around and dipping your 100 00:07:02,279 --> 00:07:05,400 Speaker 1: wick all over town. Let's dip your wick in Thailand. 101 00:07:06,200 --> 00:07:08,080 Speaker 1: You know, we need to do keep your wick wetter. 102 00:07:09,200 --> 00:07:11,000 Speaker 1: So it's like all right, And you know, Billy Idol 103 00:07:11,040 --> 00:07:16,560 Speaker 1: had had some drug problems in the past, so he's like, okay. 104 00:07:16,640 --> 00:07:19,320 Speaker 1: Harry Johnson says to him, let's go to Thailand. We're 105 00:07:19,320 --> 00:07:21,440 Speaker 1: just gonna drink a ton of booze. We're just going 106 00:07:21,480 --> 00:07:24,640 Speaker 1: to use the services of a lot of sex workers 107 00:07:25,040 --> 00:07:26,640 Speaker 1: and this is going to make you feel really good. 108 00:07:26,640 --> 00:07:29,120 Speaker 1: But no drugs. We're not going to do drugs. And 109 00:07:29,120 --> 00:07:32,840 Speaker 1: they're like, yeah, of course, no drugs. So a little 110 00:07:32,840 --> 00:07:35,920 Speaker 1: bit more about Billy and Harry. They've only known each 111 00:07:35,960 --> 00:07:38,880 Speaker 1: other for about a year. Wait, so Harry is a 112 00:07:38,960 --> 00:07:43,440 Speaker 1: new friend. Harry is idle make new friends. Well, he 113 00:07:43,520 --> 00:07:47,040 Speaker 1: makes them because I think that they got connected through 114 00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:52,040 Speaker 1: their love of motorcycles, shared interest, shared interest. Well, and 115 00:07:52,200 --> 00:07:57,960 Speaker 1: Harry was a hairdresser, so he's basically like the plot 116 00:07:57,960 --> 00:08:01,160 Speaker 1: of shampoo come to life oh so much so, Harry 117 00:08:01,200 --> 00:08:05,280 Speaker 1: the Hairdresser became a hairdresser to pick up chicks because 118 00:08:05,280 --> 00:08:06,960 Speaker 1: he thought, well, this is just like an inn. I'm 119 00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:10,840 Speaker 1: just plentiful, and I'm just I'm just an absolute rascal. 120 00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:12,880 Speaker 1: And so he's like, let me be the only straight 121 00:08:12,960 --> 00:08:16,400 Speaker 1: dude in a world full of women looking to be pleased. Totally, totally. 122 00:08:17,280 --> 00:08:20,720 Speaker 1: But he transitions into another job, which is Billy Idol's assistant. 123 00:08:21,280 --> 00:08:25,280 Speaker 1: Not so much. But they love They have motorcycles. They 124 00:08:25,320 --> 00:08:27,480 Speaker 1: have these Harley's and they with other guys and they 125 00:08:27,520 --> 00:08:30,720 Speaker 1: all ride around together. And they gave their crew a name. 126 00:08:31,280 --> 00:08:38,160 Speaker 1: They called themselves the Rude Dudes. Which one is the 127 00:08:38,240 --> 00:08:42,880 Speaker 1: name that like a group of golden retrievers wearing sunglasses 128 00:08:42,880 --> 00:08:48,640 Speaker 1: would give themselves, The Rude Dudes, golden retrievers and sunglasses 129 00:08:48,679 --> 00:08:53,319 Speaker 1: and tank tops. Is sitting on like a the shore 130 00:08:53,320 --> 00:08:58,280 Speaker 1: of a lake, cracking back some bruskies, just a couple 131 00:08:58,400 --> 00:09:01,600 Speaker 1: of just a bunch of rude dudes. You know, they 132 00:09:01,640 --> 00:09:05,480 Speaker 1: got a barbecue going. That's when you tell me, rude dudes, 133 00:09:05,559 --> 00:09:08,480 Speaker 1: that's what I'm seeing. I'm not seeing Billy Idol and 134 00:09:08,559 --> 00:09:12,880 Speaker 1: some other sort of you know, frosted tips guys on 135 00:09:13,240 --> 00:09:18,040 Speaker 1: Harley Davidson's hair dresser who hangs up with Billy Idol 136 00:09:18,080 --> 00:09:21,160 Speaker 1: being a rude dude and calling himself that it's easy 137 00:09:21,160 --> 00:09:23,840 Speaker 1: to imagine being a rude person. They're a bunch of 138 00:09:23,840 --> 00:09:27,920 Speaker 1: food dudes. So yeah, um, so the rude dudes they 139 00:09:27,960 --> 00:09:31,160 Speaker 1: decided to go to Bangkok and blow off a little steam. 140 00:09:31,240 --> 00:09:35,160 Speaker 1: It sounds like more than that. True. Let me let 141 00:09:35,160 --> 00:09:39,440 Speaker 1: me just take a break and collect myself and and 142 00:09:39,960 --> 00:09:42,480 Speaker 1: try and get the image of the Golden Retrievers wearing 143 00:09:42,480 --> 00:09:44,400 Speaker 1: sunglasses out of my head. And then I'm gonna let 144 00:09:44,400 --> 00:09:46,120 Speaker 1: you know how that worked out for them. Cool, I'm 145 00:09:46,120 --> 00:10:11,280 Speaker 1: gonna change my shirt. Okay, So, rude Dude one and 146 00:10:11,360 --> 00:10:17,360 Speaker 1: rude Dude too, Billy Idol, and I think Billy Idol's 147 00:10:17,440 --> 00:10:21,360 Speaker 1: rude dude one, and Harry Johnson is rude dude too. 148 00:10:22,120 --> 00:10:25,439 Speaker 1: Number two D two r D two. They go to Thailand. 149 00:10:25,800 --> 00:10:31,160 Speaker 1: They want to visit brothels, drink tropical libations, but no drugs, 150 00:10:30,520 --> 00:10:34,800 Speaker 1: no sir. They check into the Presidential Suite at the 151 00:10:34,840 --> 00:10:38,000 Speaker 1: Oriental Hotel and for the first week they totally stuck 152 00:10:38,000 --> 00:10:42,280 Speaker 1: to the plan. They're just drinking themselves silly there and 153 00:10:42,320 --> 00:10:45,520 Speaker 1: then dragging their rum soaked bones down to a brothel 154 00:10:45,600 --> 00:10:48,320 Speaker 1: and just parades of women and they all they were 155 00:10:48,320 --> 00:10:50,920 Speaker 1: apparently wearing numbers, and that's how they would you know, 156 00:10:51,280 --> 00:10:55,520 Speaker 1: I'll take a number fourteen Idol and Harry Johnson. By 157 00:10:55,520 --> 00:10:57,120 Speaker 1: the end of the night, they may have been wearing. 158 00:10:57,160 --> 00:10:58,800 Speaker 1: Maybe they're wearing like a one in a two, like 159 00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:03,880 Speaker 1: one too. Okay, let's say they did that. That's a 160 00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:05,880 Speaker 1: new that's a new part of the story, and maybe 161 00:11:05,920 --> 00:11:08,959 Speaker 1: the sex workers are picking them. I'll take number two. 162 00:11:09,200 --> 00:11:12,520 Speaker 1: Don't send me to number two. Um So. Then one 163 00:11:12,600 --> 00:11:15,800 Speaker 1: of the other places that they went was Bangkok's hottest disco. 164 00:11:16,320 --> 00:11:20,480 Speaker 1: What do you think Bangkok's hottest disco is called um 165 00:11:20,679 --> 00:11:28,800 Speaker 1: Nancy pants? Oh no, it's called Bubbles. I was gonna say, 166 00:11:28,840 --> 00:11:31,320 Speaker 1: I liked to I like to imagine that they named 167 00:11:31,360 --> 00:11:35,320 Speaker 1: it after Michael Jackson's chimpans. The hotted nightclub in Bangkok 168 00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:38,560 Speaker 1: is named after Michael jack It's got everything, it's got 169 00:11:38,640 --> 00:11:42,680 Speaker 1: weird dude one. So Bubbles. They go to Bubbles. They're 170 00:11:42,679 --> 00:11:45,240 Speaker 1: just having a great time, but you know, it's like 171 00:11:45,559 --> 00:11:49,200 Speaker 1: alcohol is a depressant and they're getting wiped out with 172 00:11:49,240 --> 00:11:52,480 Speaker 1: all their extracurriculars, and so they need like a pick 173 00:11:52,559 --> 00:11:55,839 Speaker 1: me up. So they go to this cab driver and 174 00:11:55,880 --> 00:11:59,760 Speaker 1: they're like, sir, could you get us some cocaine? But 175 00:12:00,040 --> 00:12:02,600 Speaker 1: had branks their rule of no drugs. But you know what, 176 00:12:02,760 --> 00:12:05,240 Speaker 1: rude dudes don't really live by the room. Now they don't. 177 00:12:05,280 --> 00:12:06,520 Speaker 1: I was the thing. They were going to maybe get 178 00:12:06,520 --> 00:12:08,840 Speaker 1: somebody that tie speed whiskey. They're like, nope, straight to 179 00:12:08,840 --> 00:12:15,880 Speaker 1: the just sir, cocaine please, And then driver says, oh, yes, yes, 180 00:12:15,920 --> 00:12:19,160 Speaker 1: I'm off, and so he leaves, comes back like an 181 00:12:19,160 --> 00:12:22,199 Speaker 1: hour later, and he gives them this like eight inch 182 00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:26,800 Speaker 1: vial of white powder. Did you say eight? He gives 183 00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:32,560 Speaker 1: eight inches of white powder to them, Harry, he gives 184 00:12:32,559 --> 00:12:35,400 Speaker 1: it to Harry Johnson. Given Harry Johnson eight inches. That's 185 00:12:35,440 --> 00:12:39,680 Speaker 1: exactly why did I know you do that? Sorry? Harry 186 00:12:39,760 --> 00:12:43,599 Speaker 1: tastes it. Here's another detail and invented detail that I 187 00:12:43,720 --> 00:12:46,200 Speaker 1: like to imagine. Let's say that Harry has like a 188 00:12:46,280 --> 00:12:49,560 Speaker 1: super long cokenail and so he dips it in there 189 00:12:49,600 --> 00:12:52,160 Speaker 1: and he tastes it and he's like, oh, Billy, this 190 00:12:52,240 --> 00:12:56,600 Speaker 1: is not the cocaine. What is this? This is it's 191 00:12:56,720 --> 00:13:02,680 Speaker 1: really strong China white heroine. Oh so they didn't say, oh, 192 00:13:02,720 --> 00:13:05,240 Speaker 1: excuse me, driver, we need to make a return, could 193 00:13:05,400 --> 00:13:08,160 Speaker 1: an exchange? There's been some mistake. If not the drugs, 194 00:13:08,200 --> 00:13:10,720 Speaker 1: I ordered know. What they do is they wander around 195 00:13:10,800 --> 00:13:17,480 Speaker 1: through all these marketplaces looking for tinfoilo. I need a 196 00:13:17,480 --> 00:13:19,640 Speaker 1: little gear. There's a dragon here, I'm trying to chase. 197 00:13:19,800 --> 00:13:22,760 Speaker 1: They can't find any because I guess they went to 198 00:13:22,800 --> 00:13:25,240 Speaker 1: the wrong markets, or perhaps they didn't know how to 199 00:13:25,280 --> 00:13:28,720 Speaker 1: ask for I don't know. Whatever, they don't have any tinfoil. 200 00:13:28,760 --> 00:13:30,520 Speaker 1: So they go back to the hotel room and then 201 00:13:30,520 --> 00:13:33,880 Speaker 1: they're like mcgivering out because they see a bunch of 202 00:13:33,920 --> 00:13:37,480 Speaker 1: candy bars in the mini bar and they take the 203 00:13:37,520 --> 00:13:41,600 Speaker 1: foil wrappers and they're like, ha ha, now we can 204 00:13:41,679 --> 00:13:45,560 Speaker 1: do super thin paper tinfoil, which is generally kind of paper. 205 00:13:45,600 --> 00:13:49,120 Speaker 1: I don't know, maybe like tie candy bars are actually 206 00:13:49,400 --> 00:13:53,840 Speaker 1: wrapped in tinfoil. Kay, maybe whatever. That's what they used. 207 00:13:53,920 --> 00:13:58,319 Speaker 1: So they that's how they were able to utilize their heroine. 208 00:13:58,760 --> 00:14:01,880 Speaker 1: They could they could use it. They get high as kites. 209 00:14:02,480 --> 00:14:06,200 Speaker 1: They're just like walking around like zombies. They don't go 210 00:14:06,320 --> 00:14:08,480 Speaker 1: to the brothels now they just have the sex workers 211 00:14:08,559 --> 00:14:11,320 Speaker 1: sent up to them. They are the brothel. They are 212 00:14:11,480 --> 00:14:16,280 Speaker 1: the brothel, but they're just like zonked right, Um, now 213 00:14:16,520 --> 00:14:18,679 Speaker 1: this isn't really nice hotel. You know who else was 214 00:14:18,720 --> 00:14:22,280 Speaker 1: staying at the hotel that time, The Queen of England. Yes, 215 00:14:22,720 --> 00:14:24,560 Speaker 1: and she went up to the sweet No, I think 216 00:14:24,560 --> 00:14:28,000 Speaker 1: I'll take some china white knock knock, Do you have 217 00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:31,760 Speaker 1: the cocaine? They're like, no, we don't. No. The Queen 218 00:14:31,880 --> 00:14:35,240 Speaker 1: was not there, and it was Mel Gibson and his 219 00:14:35,360 --> 00:14:40,920 Speaker 1: family coming out of no or coming out of Last Field. 220 00:14:42,440 --> 00:14:45,520 Speaker 1: He was there most likely to film Air America, which 221 00:14:45,560 --> 00:14:47,880 Speaker 1: is a movie about two dudes and a bunch of heroines. 222 00:14:47,960 --> 00:14:53,000 Speaker 1: Ironically it is ironically so Mel's there and um with 223 00:14:53,080 --> 00:14:58,200 Speaker 1: his family, does he interact with Billy Billy Idol at 224 00:14:58,200 --> 00:15:01,200 Speaker 1: one point must have made it to the elevators and 225 00:15:01,520 --> 00:15:04,640 Speaker 1: but he gets in and he passes out, and the 226 00:15:04,720 --> 00:15:07,480 Speaker 1: doors in the lobby open up and he's half in, 227 00:15:07,640 --> 00:15:10,080 Speaker 1: half out of the elevator and the doors are opening 228 00:15:10,080 --> 00:15:13,880 Speaker 1: and closing on him. Just the pool of Billy Idol, 229 00:15:13,960 --> 00:15:18,360 Speaker 1: the pool of limp Billy Idol. And Harry's like, come on, Billy, now, 230 00:15:18,400 --> 00:15:22,240 Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't think that Harry was British, 231 00:15:22,280 --> 00:15:25,920 Speaker 1: so Billy I was like, oh, in a British accent. 232 00:15:26,280 --> 00:15:30,840 Speaker 1: And then Harry says, Billy, Billy, wake up, William. It 233 00:15:30,960 --> 00:15:35,560 Speaker 1: is time to arrive William. And he's just gone. I mean, 234 00:15:35,600 --> 00:15:39,480 Speaker 1: he's alive, but he's just out. And so mel Gibson 235 00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:41,160 Speaker 1: and his family come up because they need to go 236 00:15:41,240 --> 00:15:44,960 Speaker 1: to their room, and they look down and mel Gibson 237 00:15:44,960 --> 00:15:47,160 Speaker 1: apparently was super polite and just said, oh, excuse me, 238 00:15:47,240 --> 00:15:49,880 Speaker 1: and then took his family to another elevator. Do you 239 00:15:49,920 --> 00:15:52,880 Speaker 1: think he even knew it was Billy Idol? Probably not. 240 00:15:52,920 --> 00:15:56,280 Speaker 1: But here's the Okay, this is for yet another imagined 241 00:15:56,440 --> 00:16:01,040 Speaker 1: detail of mine. I like to pretend that Billy Idol 242 00:16:01,160 --> 00:16:04,560 Speaker 1: opened one eye and mel Gibson's looking down him, and 243 00:16:04,600 --> 00:16:07,640 Speaker 1: Billy Idol says, what do you think you're looking at, sugar? 244 00:16:10,160 --> 00:16:13,120 Speaker 1: And that's because that's what That's what mel Gibson said 245 00:16:13,120 --> 00:16:15,600 Speaker 1: to that cop who pulled him over later, among other 246 00:16:15,680 --> 00:16:18,560 Speaker 1: really horrible things. I think maybe that's where that's where 247 00:16:18,600 --> 00:16:21,080 Speaker 1: mel Gibson learned it. He learned it from Billy Idol 248 00:16:21,400 --> 00:16:25,080 Speaker 1: buying in a pool of his own sick exactly, and 249 00:16:25,120 --> 00:16:28,560 Speaker 1: that that phrase just stuck in his head and then 250 00:16:28,720 --> 00:16:31,920 Speaker 1: and then in his twisted mind, you know, next time 251 00:16:32,080 --> 00:16:35,800 Speaker 1: I'm twisted on drugs and yeah and anti semitism, I'm 252 00:16:35,840 --> 00:16:41,440 Speaker 1: really gonna let it rip. So that that's let's pretend. Um. 253 00:16:41,480 --> 00:16:47,280 Speaker 1: So the boys, the rude dudes, they're running out of heroine. Um. 254 00:16:47,320 --> 00:16:51,160 Speaker 1: And so when you run out of heroin, apparently your 255 00:16:51,200 --> 00:16:53,480 Speaker 1: best bet is to go to a pharmacy and buy 256 00:16:53,600 --> 00:16:56,040 Speaker 1: up all the tranquilizers. Oh of course. I mean I 257 00:16:56,080 --> 00:16:58,000 Speaker 1: was going to say, well, you know, they probably went 258 00:16:58,000 --> 00:17:00,120 Speaker 1: to a pharmacy and bought up all the tranquilis. I 259 00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:03,040 Speaker 1: didn't they go back to the cab driver. Anyway. This 260 00:17:03,080 --> 00:17:06,280 Speaker 1: doesn't mellow him though, Like Billy doesn't get tranquilized. He 261 00:17:06,440 --> 00:17:11,200 Speaker 1: hulks out on tranquilizers. They made him crazy. He gets 262 00:17:11,240 --> 00:17:14,720 Speaker 1: super angry, so he starts trashing the room. Up until 263 00:17:14,720 --> 00:17:17,639 Speaker 1: this point, you know, he's just been lulling about and 264 00:17:18,480 --> 00:17:23,320 Speaker 1: you know, just being like heroin, like spirals for eyes, 265 00:17:23,600 --> 00:17:27,200 Speaker 1: and it was just you know, now he's just like smash, 266 00:17:27,480 --> 00:17:31,280 Speaker 1: he goes nuts. Um. This wasn't as a total side. 267 00:17:31,320 --> 00:17:33,760 Speaker 1: This was not the first time that Billy Idol had 268 00:17:33,760 --> 00:17:38,879 Speaker 1: trashed a hotel room. I mean, but in two, he 269 00:17:38,960 --> 00:17:42,280 Speaker 1: was staying at the Chateau Marmont in l A. He 270 00:17:42,440 --> 00:17:45,960 Speaker 1: was doing the drugs, doing the drink as one billy 271 00:17:46,040 --> 00:17:50,840 Speaker 1: does at at the Chateau Marmont. Okay, great epic, legendary place. 272 00:17:51,600 --> 00:17:55,000 Speaker 1: He's going by the playbook, and he's pretty much helping 273 00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:57,880 Speaker 1: to build the mythos of the Chateau Marmont exactly. He's 274 00:17:57,920 --> 00:18:01,679 Speaker 1: helping them hit their quota. He then, of course, he 275 00:18:01,720 --> 00:18:04,560 Speaker 1: goes he goes over the edge because there are no 276 00:18:04,720 --> 00:18:08,720 Speaker 1: rules for rude dudes. So he's going nuts and he 277 00:18:08,840 --> 00:18:12,479 Speaker 1: just starts destroying the hotel room. Why because he finds 278 00:18:12,480 --> 00:18:15,200 Speaker 1: out that the liquor stores are closed. It's like after 279 00:18:15,280 --> 00:18:18,840 Speaker 1: two am, and you can't buy alcohol until six am. 280 00:18:18,880 --> 00:18:22,080 Speaker 1: So he just he goes nuts, like I can't wait 281 00:18:22,119 --> 00:18:27,160 Speaker 1: four hours. I need my Midori sours. So he goes 282 00:18:27,200 --> 00:18:32,160 Speaker 1: crazy and he's just like trashing the place, TV whatever. 283 00:18:32,640 --> 00:18:36,280 Speaker 1: He's stripped down, naked and covered in his own blood. 284 00:18:38,080 --> 00:18:45,200 Speaker 1: And the manager comes and he somehow convinces the manager 285 00:18:45,359 --> 00:18:48,760 Speaker 1: not to kick him out until like officially morning. And 286 00:18:48,800 --> 00:18:50,760 Speaker 1: this is because he can't get a drink. Because he 287 00:18:50,800 --> 00:18:53,919 Speaker 1: can't get a drink, so instead of the management like 288 00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:56,800 Speaker 1: this you know, we don't know. You don't do this 289 00:18:56,840 --> 00:19:00,359 Speaker 1: and swatting him with a newspaper. He's like, all right, 290 00:19:00,359 --> 00:19:02,600 Speaker 1: I'll give you till ten and then you gotta check out. 291 00:19:03,359 --> 00:19:06,360 Speaker 1: So Billy like he gets like he kind of passes 292 00:19:06,359 --> 00:19:09,840 Speaker 1: out for a little while, and then he wakes up. 293 00:19:09,880 --> 00:19:13,000 Speaker 1: The sun streaming in the front door of the bungalow 294 00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:16,720 Speaker 1: that he's in um is open, and he lights a joint, 295 00:19:16,800 --> 00:19:21,879 Speaker 1: still totally naked. Now this is so marijuana is not 296 00:19:22,000 --> 00:19:27,560 Speaker 1: legal California. No, So he's he's hitting, hitting this joint 297 00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:30,639 Speaker 1: naked in the doorway of the bungalow, just chilling with 298 00:19:30,680 --> 00:19:34,320 Speaker 1: some jazz cabbage as one totally that's sticky broccoli. And 299 00:19:34,359 --> 00:19:38,359 Speaker 1: he sees the cops coming and he doesn't panic because 300 00:19:38,359 --> 00:19:40,960 Speaker 1: he's a rude dude, but he's thinking, like, well, here 301 00:19:41,040 --> 00:19:46,480 Speaker 1: it goes, I'm gonna get busted for grass. No, the 302 00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:50,960 Speaker 1: cops just keep walking. They don't care. Wait what because 303 00:19:51,400 --> 00:19:53,879 Speaker 1: there was something more important going on than busting Billy 304 00:19:53,920 --> 00:19:56,879 Speaker 1: Idol for could possibly be more important than busting Billy Idol. 305 00:19:57,400 --> 00:20:00,520 Speaker 1: A dead John Belushi, a couple of bungalows over Oh 306 00:20:01,880 --> 00:20:07,080 Speaker 1: that that happened the night she died was destroying a bungalow, 307 00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:09,439 Speaker 1: like you know, just like Death got confused and went 308 00:20:09,440 --> 00:20:14,920 Speaker 1: to the wrong door center of chaos. Death is like, oh, man, 309 00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:18,280 Speaker 1: so I can't take them both at the same time. 310 00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:20,520 Speaker 1: So I just you know, I guess he just snuffs 311 00:20:20,520 --> 00:20:22,960 Speaker 1: out the joint. Was like, oh, I gotta blowtown. Now 312 00:20:23,480 --> 00:20:28,680 Speaker 1: gets out of there. So anyway, back to our story, 313 00:20:29,280 --> 00:20:33,080 Speaker 1: Billy and Harry, Billy's trashed the hotel room. They decide, 314 00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:36,560 Speaker 1: we got to get out of Bangkok. This is bad business. 315 00:20:37,080 --> 00:20:41,280 Speaker 1: Let's go to the resort town of Pattaya. Why And 316 00:20:41,280 --> 00:20:47,520 Speaker 1: I don't know if I'm saying that correctly. Patia Pattaya, Yes, sure, 317 00:20:47,359 --> 00:20:50,080 Speaker 1: there's no there's there's no wrong way to be right 318 00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:54,440 Speaker 1: in pta Um. Alright, So they decided they make all 319 00:20:54,480 --> 00:20:57,160 Speaker 1: they've been making so many good decisions of course, I mean, 320 00:20:57,160 --> 00:20:59,480 Speaker 1: just a string of the uns. So they're like, you know, 321 00:20:59,480 --> 00:21:03,280 Speaker 1: what would be a good decisions? You know, if you're 322 00:21:03,280 --> 00:21:08,119 Speaker 1: a really good decision. Rude dudes, rent jet skis and 323 00:21:08,160 --> 00:21:10,800 Speaker 1: play chicken on them, well naked. Oh, the cocaine of 324 00:21:10,840 --> 00:21:14,680 Speaker 1: the seas. The cocaine, the jet skis, the cocaine and seas. 325 00:21:14,720 --> 00:21:17,399 Speaker 1: So they're playing chicken, and of course Billy crashes and 326 00:21:17,480 --> 00:21:21,159 Speaker 1: sings jet ski. So this like family that he had 327 00:21:21,160 --> 00:21:23,240 Speaker 1: rented the jet ski from, he has to pay him off. 328 00:21:23,480 --> 00:21:25,840 Speaker 1: Do you think Billy is, by the way, just preternaturally 329 00:21:26,080 --> 00:21:28,480 Speaker 1: warm blooded red? That way, he's always getting naked, like 330 00:21:28,600 --> 00:21:32,639 Speaker 1: doing a toddler who just sheds his clothes like need 331 00:21:32,720 --> 00:21:35,399 Speaker 1: to be free. He probably runs hot, you know, And 332 00:21:35,440 --> 00:21:37,760 Speaker 1: I think it's just he wants to be liberated. He 333 00:21:37,840 --> 00:21:40,840 Speaker 1: needs that cooling air flow constantly rushing over him, otherwise 334 00:21:40,960 --> 00:21:44,760 Speaker 1: one of his parts may fall off. And honestly, can 335 00:21:44,800 --> 00:21:47,320 Speaker 1: you be a rude dude and be fully closed? I 336 00:21:47,359 --> 00:21:49,720 Speaker 1: don't think that's possible. This Golden Retrievers aren't wearing clote 337 00:21:49,720 --> 00:21:51,440 Speaker 1: well they you said they were wearing tank tops. Well 338 00:21:51,480 --> 00:21:53,919 Speaker 1: that's just formal aware. But there if a Golden Retriever 339 00:21:54,040 --> 00:21:56,879 Speaker 1: is wearing just a tank top, he's he or she 340 00:21:57,240 --> 00:22:01,159 Speaker 1: is basically porky pig in it. There's no pants, So 341 00:22:01,200 --> 00:22:06,000 Speaker 1: that's still rude dude. Uh So, yeah, they're in this resort, 342 00:22:06,359 --> 00:22:09,760 Speaker 1: it's beautiful. They've crashed a jet ski. They go back 343 00:22:09,800 --> 00:22:11,320 Speaker 1: to the room, and what do you think they do 344 00:22:11,480 --> 00:22:15,159 Speaker 1: back in their room? Um to play a sensible amount 345 00:22:15,160 --> 00:22:17,960 Speaker 1: of gin rummy, and they talk about their personal lives 346 00:22:18,000 --> 00:22:20,600 Speaker 1: and their relationships with the women in their lives. That's 347 00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:23,280 Speaker 1: exactly what happened. They helped each other hell the end, 348 00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:26,919 Speaker 1: and they did drugs is what happened. Oh, you live 349 00:22:26,960 --> 00:22:30,360 Speaker 1: in a fantasy world, dude. They do a bunch more drugs. 350 00:22:30,400 --> 00:22:33,040 Speaker 1: Billy passes out and he wakes up and the room 351 00:22:33,119 --> 00:22:35,200 Speaker 1: is dark and there are some sex workers with him 352 00:22:35,200 --> 00:22:38,800 Speaker 1: and no Harry Johnson. It's always bad and you got 353 00:22:38,840 --> 00:22:43,040 Speaker 1: sex workers and no Harry Johnson because disaster that's a 354 00:22:43,119 --> 00:22:47,440 Speaker 1: no go. So he's just so mad, Harry, Why did 355 00:22:47,480 --> 00:22:49,520 Speaker 1: you do this to me? Why did you leave me? 356 00:22:49,960 --> 00:22:53,200 Speaker 1: He wakes up angry with sex workers. He's got sex workers, 357 00:22:53,240 --> 00:22:55,520 Speaker 1: no Harry Johnson, and this pisses him off. Yeah, that 358 00:22:55,560 --> 00:22:58,959 Speaker 1: pissed him off. So he double hulks out. He just 359 00:22:59,000 --> 00:23:03,439 Speaker 1: goes absolutely nuts. He picks up this giant table and 360 00:23:03,560 --> 00:23:07,080 Speaker 1: throws it through a plate glass wall of windows, right 361 00:23:07,920 --> 00:23:10,480 Speaker 1: and then he smashes the TV, smashes up some really 362 00:23:10,520 --> 00:23:15,879 Speaker 1: lovely teak furniture. Furniture right now. Um, the resort owner 363 00:23:16,359 --> 00:23:21,680 Speaker 1: not happy, not not pleased. So the owner says, you 364 00:23:21,720 --> 00:23:23,280 Speaker 1: gotta get out of here. So they're like, fine, we're 365 00:23:23,280 --> 00:23:26,400 Speaker 1: gonna take this rude dude show back to Bangkok. We're 366 00:23:26,400 --> 00:23:29,560 Speaker 1: taking our show on the rood later. Let's let's take 367 00:23:29,600 --> 00:23:31,639 Speaker 1: a break, come back, and then I'm gonna tell you 368 00:23:31,680 --> 00:23:34,000 Speaker 1: what happens next to the rude dudes. I'm gonna change 369 00:23:34,040 --> 00:23:59,560 Speaker 1: my pants. Billie Idol and Harry Johnson. Mom, the rude 370 00:23:59,600 --> 00:24:04,840 Speaker 1: did they've been uh sent They've sent themselves back to Bangkok. 371 00:24:04,880 --> 00:24:09,080 Speaker 1: They've self deported themselves from the time resort back to Bangkok, 372 00:24:09,359 --> 00:24:13,480 Speaker 1: and um, they check into the Royal Orchids Sheraton. Remember 373 00:24:13,520 --> 00:24:15,520 Speaker 1: we're talking about that. I asked you if you could 374 00:24:15,520 --> 00:24:18,560 Speaker 1: imagine staying there, yeah, and I said, no, not really, 375 00:24:18,600 --> 00:24:20,560 Speaker 1: but you're going to do your level best. I'm still 376 00:24:20,560 --> 00:24:22,840 Speaker 1: doing that. I'm still imagining I'm there in your mind. 377 00:24:24,160 --> 00:24:28,800 Speaker 1: The thread count Egyptian cotton. Yeah, is that the smell 378 00:24:28,800 --> 00:24:33,359 Speaker 1: of Guardinia there? No, it's Royal Orchids. Um, I gotta 379 00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:36,480 Speaker 1: take one of these ropes back home with me. Just yeah, stick. 380 00:24:36,720 --> 00:24:38,920 Speaker 1: I don't think that they mind. You're paying that much 381 00:24:38,960 --> 00:24:42,960 Speaker 1: for a room, You've better be able to so back 382 00:24:42,960 --> 00:24:47,680 Speaker 1: at the Royal Orchids Sherton. Uh. Everyone in Billie Idol's 383 00:24:47,760 --> 00:24:51,200 Speaker 1: life is trying to contact him and tell him get 384 00:24:51,200 --> 00:24:56,679 Speaker 1: back to Los Angeles now, enough of this. So are 385 00:24:56,720 --> 00:24:59,360 Speaker 1: they hearing like international reports is that the lawyers are 386 00:24:59,359 --> 00:25:01,920 Speaker 1: going this is getting cost I don't know, I don't 387 00:25:01,920 --> 00:25:04,200 Speaker 1: know who's telling him about all the malarkey that's going 388 00:25:04,280 --> 00:25:08,480 Speaker 1: down in Thailand. Maybe you know, maybe seeing the bank 389 00:25:08,520 --> 00:25:12,040 Speaker 1: account go down and down. Hell yeah, credit card charges 390 00:25:12,560 --> 00:25:14,639 Speaker 1: because every time they trash a place, they got to 391 00:25:14,640 --> 00:25:16,119 Speaker 1: pay him off, and they have to pay for the 392 00:25:16,200 --> 00:25:19,720 Speaker 1: jet skis. His manager is probably seeing like money transfers 393 00:25:19,720 --> 00:25:21,880 Speaker 1: and that sort of thing, and he's probably dumb enough 394 00:25:21,920 --> 00:25:28,919 Speaker 1: to call manage agents and be like, I need more heroin, right, 395 00:25:30,080 --> 00:25:32,560 Speaker 1: and so um, all these people are like you got 396 00:25:32,560 --> 00:25:34,240 Speaker 1: to get back here now, this is You've got to 397 00:25:34,280 --> 00:25:39,800 Speaker 1: stop this, stop it and stop it bad. And all 398 00:25:39,800 --> 00:25:42,639 Speaker 1: these phone calls and he thinks in his you know, 399 00:25:42,720 --> 00:25:45,119 Speaker 1: his logic is like, all right, I'll go back to 400 00:25:45,280 --> 00:25:47,240 Speaker 1: l A. But I'm going to need at least a 401 00:25:47,280 --> 00:25:50,439 Speaker 1: week off of heroin if I'm in a white knuckle 402 00:25:50,520 --> 00:25:53,560 Speaker 1: this fourteen hour flight back to l A. He's been 403 00:25:53,600 --> 00:25:56,159 Speaker 1: doing enough heroin to get addicted. Well, I think it 404 00:25:56,280 --> 00:26:00,560 Speaker 1: just reawakened underlying addiction that makes itself And I mean 405 00:26:00,600 --> 00:26:05,080 Speaker 1: that's that's that's heartbreaking, right that like he you know, 406 00:26:05,119 --> 00:26:08,879 Speaker 1: he can't escape that. But it's also it's also a 407 00:26:08,880 --> 00:26:12,880 Speaker 1: little ridiculous as me. So he's he's like, just give 408 00:26:12,920 --> 00:26:16,200 Speaker 1: me a week, everybody, and they're thinking, oh boy, um, 409 00:26:16,359 --> 00:26:20,280 Speaker 1: they get a they book a flight, he and Harry. Yeah, 410 00:26:20,600 --> 00:26:22,639 Speaker 1: their rude dudes are coming home, going back to l 411 00:26:22,680 --> 00:26:26,240 Speaker 1: a uh. And that at the flight is about three 412 00:26:26,280 --> 00:26:29,520 Speaker 1: weeks from when they arrived. I've been on a three 413 00:26:29,520 --> 00:26:32,920 Speaker 1: week bender. Um it comes time for him to get 414 00:26:32,920 --> 00:26:36,920 Speaker 1: on the plane, is like, you can't rouse Billy. He's 415 00:26:37,000 --> 00:26:38,880 Speaker 1: changed his mind that Heroin is too good to leave. 416 00:26:38,960 --> 00:26:40,560 Speaker 1: I think that I don't even know if he was. 417 00:26:40,640 --> 00:26:42,399 Speaker 1: I think he might have been able to kind of 418 00:26:42,480 --> 00:26:44,879 Speaker 1: kick it. But he's probably doing all those tranquilizers and 419 00:26:44,920 --> 00:26:48,760 Speaker 1: he's just like he's he's hopped up on goofballs. He's 420 00:26:48,760 --> 00:26:53,120 Speaker 1: hopped up on Billy Idol exactly. He's high on his supply. 421 00:26:53,640 --> 00:26:56,080 Speaker 1: So what happens. You need to get Billy Idol to 422 00:26:56,119 --> 00:26:58,000 Speaker 1: the airport, You need to get him out of your hotel. 423 00:26:58,080 --> 00:27:00,520 Speaker 1: What do you do? You're the hotel manager, get a 424 00:27:00,520 --> 00:27:07,520 Speaker 1: big spatula, yes, and you call the tie army. I 425 00:27:07,600 --> 00:27:11,240 Speaker 1: need your help. So this takes us back to the 426 00:27:11,320 --> 00:27:14,400 Speaker 1: very beginning when I had you doing that that exercise 427 00:27:14,440 --> 00:27:19,440 Speaker 1: and imagination. It's come full circle. Hein, we've made along 428 00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:25,320 Speaker 1: the way. So these guys show up in the uniform 429 00:27:25,520 --> 00:27:29,600 Speaker 1: with weapons, and a nurse probably in like a classic 430 00:27:30,160 --> 00:27:35,080 Speaker 1: nurse's costume and our nurse's uniform, I should say, when 431 00:27:35,160 --> 00:27:39,280 Speaker 1: we wear them exactly. So the nurse comes in now, 432 00:27:39,560 --> 00:27:42,720 Speaker 1: she had to have used serious tranquilizers if he was 433 00:27:42,960 --> 00:27:47,760 Speaker 1: already on right. So I'm sure she had just a 434 00:27:47,800 --> 00:27:50,720 Speaker 1: giant syringe and just like plugged it right and do 435 00:27:50,880 --> 00:27:54,560 Speaker 1: as rump or how I cat you have your hands 436 00:27:54,560 --> 00:27:57,240 Speaker 1: so far apart like it's our cartoon syringe. It's a 437 00:27:57,320 --> 00:28:03,480 Speaker 1: giant novelty syringe from party Central. But I also another 438 00:28:03,720 --> 00:28:06,919 Speaker 1: imagined detail of false detail that I've created in my 439 00:28:06,960 --> 00:28:10,800 Speaker 1: head about this is that she has a holster and 440 00:28:10,840 --> 00:28:14,639 Speaker 1: she pulls out a tranquilizer gun and just like knocks 441 00:28:14,680 --> 00:28:17,679 Speaker 1: him with a couple of darts. Instead of like she 442 00:28:17,760 --> 00:28:20,600 Speaker 1: gives him like stuff that would take down big game 443 00:28:21,400 --> 00:28:26,080 Speaker 1: rhinoceros tranquilizing elephant tranquilizer and that's it. So let's pretend 444 00:28:26,080 --> 00:28:28,160 Speaker 1: that that's what she did. So she didn't come in 445 00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:31,320 Speaker 1: with even the novelty size surine. She just like quick 446 00:28:31,400 --> 00:28:35,480 Speaker 1: draw and then he like he looks at her, just 447 00:28:35,520 --> 00:28:39,400 Speaker 1: all surprised, double tapped me, why would you do that? 448 00:28:39,720 --> 00:28:41,560 Speaker 1: And then off he goes. So then they lift him 449 00:28:41,640 --> 00:28:44,920 Speaker 1: up on the gurney, they wheel him out. He comes 450 00:28:44,960 --> 00:28:48,880 Speaker 1: to at the airport just barfing all over himself. Probably 451 00:28:48,920 --> 00:28:51,800 Speaker 1: still make cool among us, doesn't come to it an 452 00:28:51,840 --> 00:28:54,640 Speaker 1: airport barfing all over. They get him on the plane 453 00:28:54,640 --> 00:28:56,920 Speaker 1: and he makes it to Los Angeles safely. Can you 454 00:28:56,960 --> 00:29:00,160 Speaker 1: imagine being in that first class or I'm in first class? 455 00:29:00,440 --> 00:29:03,840 Speaker 1: The smell alone, it's like I paid how much for this? 456 00:29:05,240 --> 00:29:07,720 Speaker 1: Do you think he showered in those three weeks? I 457 00:29:07,720 --> 00:29:09,600 Speaker 1: mean aside from the time he spent on the jet 458 00:29:09,640 --> 00:29:11,320 Speaker 1: ski that was like I think he showered in the 459 00:29:11,400 --> 00:29:14,760 Speaker 1: rain of Bangkok. I think he did. So he's he's 460 00:29:14,760 --> 00:29:17,120 Speaker 1: on the plane this long plate. He gets back to 461 00:29:17,280 --> 00:29:20,520 Speaker 1: l A. He finishes the Charmed Life album as we 462 00:29:20,560 --> 00:29:24,120 Speaker 1: all know, Yeah, goes into studio, gets it done a 463 00:29:24,120 --> 00:29:28,520 Speaker 1: couple of months. He finishes recording on February five ninety, 464 00:29:28,720 --> 00:29:30,720 Speaker 1: So you know it's in the Fall of eighty nine. 465 00:29:31,560 --> 00:29:42,840 Speaker 1: Why does that sound familiar, idol, Because the very next morning, 466 00:29:42,960 --> 00:29:48,360 Speaker 1: February six, he's on his Harley Rude duding it up 467 00:29:49,520 --> 00:29:54,000 Speaker 1: and he runs the stop sign and crashes and he 468 00:29:54,200 --> 00:29:56,720 Speaker 1: really messed up his leg and his arms. Oh yeah, 469 00:29:57,240 --> 00:30:00,040 Speaker 1: you see the hell out of himself. Totally, totally. I 470 00:30:00,040 --> 00:30:03,480 Speaker 1: mean he was just like just smeared on the pavement 471 00:30:04,640 --> 00:30:08,719 Speaker 1: and looked and mel Gibson walked up and said, sugar, 472 00:30:09,200 --> 00:30:11,520 Speaker 1: how are you feeling. Yeah, so he's just like he's 473 00:30:11,560 --> 00:30:15,360 Speaker 1: just a red smear on the pavement. It's arms and 474 00:30:15,680 --> 00:30:17,560 Speaker 1: his arm and lager all messed up. He has so 475 00:30:17,600 --> 00:30:20,360 Speaker 1: many surgeries to recover and it really I mean the 476 00:30:20,400 --> 00:30:26,720 Speaker 1: album is done, um yeah, yeah, but he lost out 477 00:30:26,760 --> 00:30:30,000 Speaker 1: on a lot of stuff because of this accident. He um. 478 00:30:30,040 --> 00:30:31,920 Speaker 1: You know he was in the movie The Doors. He 479 00:30:32,000 --> 00:30:36,640 Speaker 1: plays a drinking buddy of Jim. Yeah, like road guy. Yeah. 480 00:30:37,360 --> 00:30:39,760 Speaker 1: He was actually supposed to play Jim's friend Tom Baker 481 00:30:39,800 --> 00:30:41,880 Speaker 1: in that movie. So he was like going to have 482 00:30:41,920 --> 00:30:44,120 Speaker 1: this big role. But the bigger role that he missed 483 00:30:44,160 --> 00:30:49,080 Speaker 1: out on he was supposed to be T one thousand 484 00:30:49,200 --> 00:30:54,520 Speaker 1: in Terminator to Judgment Day. Wait, what doesn't even except 485 00:30:54,920 --> 00:30:57,760 Speaker 1: Robert Patrick, the liquid Terminator. He's supposed to be that guy. 486 00:30:58,320 --> 00:31:00,760 Speaker 1: The whole reason Robert Patrick has a movie careers because 487 00:31:00,760 --> 00:31:03,800 Speaker 1: Billy Idle crashed his motorcycle. Where was Robert Patrick on 488 00:31:03,840 --> 00:31:08,000 Speaker 1: the morning of February That's what I want to know. 489 00:31:08,880 --> 00:31:11,720 Speaker 1: Throwing a spike strip in front of the Harley mohaha. 490 00:31:12,240 --> 00:31:15,080 Speaker 1: Now he gets to be the he gets to say 491 00:31:15,160 --> 00:31:18,800 Speaker 1: have you seen this boy? This boy? Yeah? And then 492 00:31:19,000 --> 00:31:21,800 Speaker 1: he also gets to be in a movie with guns 493 00:31:21,840 --> 00:31:26,680 Speaker 1: and roses on the soundtracks Lucky Duck. So yeah, Billy 494 00:31:26,720 --> 00:31:32,080 Speaker 1: Idle blows it, he crashes his sled, all goes to hell. However, 495 00:31:32,160 --> 00:31:35,200 Speaker 1: he did still tour for the album Charm Life, and 496 00:31:35,240 --> 00:31:38,000 Speaker 1: he used a cane for some of the dates. And 497 00:31:38,040 --> 00:31:40,800 Speaker 1: then there's that Cradle of Love video. We're talking about 498 00:31:40,880 --> 00:31:43,760 Speaker 1: problematic Cradle Love video. He's only seen from the waist 499 00:31:43,840 --> 00:31:45,640 Speaker 1: up in that video. That's why he's on the TV 500 00:31:45,720 --> 00:31:47,480 Speaker 1: screen and not and they have the whole scene where 501 00:31:47,520 --> 00:31:51,000 Speaker 1: she's undressing and doing this. You know who directed that video, uh, 502 00:31:51,160 --> 00:31:56,680 Speaker 1: Spike Lee David Fincher. What it's such a bad video 503 00:31:56,880 --> 00:31:58,640 Speaker 1: and it's actually kind of finch esque. Now that you 504 00:31:58,680 --> 00:32:01,880 Speaker 1: mentioned it, I can see it. It won awards. Yeah, 505 00:32:02,160 --> 00:32:08,120 Speaker 1: I'm not surprised. Car and Driver it won v m 506 00:32:08,160 --> 00:32:11,600 Speaker 1: as when that was a thing, and Car and Driver 507 00:32:11,840 --> 00:32:17,480 Speaker 1: Best Best Video. Um so yeahst in class. And then 508 00:32:17,600 --> 00:32:19,800 Speaker 1: you know, later on he goes on to to kind 509 00:32:19,840 --> 00:32:25,040 Speaker 1: of like survive. He wrote an autobiography telling all these 510 00:32:25,080 --> 00:32:31,120 Speaker 1: wild tales. He uh cleaned himself up. Sure, let's just 511 00:32:31,160 --> 00:32:33,720 Speaker 1: say that must be optimistic. I think as of right now, 512 00:32:33,720 --> 00:32:37,160 Speaker 1: I'm going to say if he isn't cleaned up, I'm 513 00:32:37,160 --> 00:32:39,240 Speaker 1: gonna wish it for him so hard that he is. 514 00:32:39,600 --> 00:32:41,800 Speaker 1: I like that about you. Thank you, it's very generous. 515 00:32:41,800 --> 00:32:44,360 Speaker 1: Thank you. Yeah. I just want everyone to be okay. 516 00:32:44,560 --> 00:32:46,520 Speaker 1: And you know, we all we all kind of have 517 00:32:46,680 --> 00:32:51,920 Speaker 1: our craziness. We all have our our demons, and sometimes 518 00:32:51,960 --> 00:32:55,960 Speaker 1: they take you to a tie adventure, otherwise not not 519 00:32:56,040 --> 00:32:59,600 Speaker 1: so exciting. Um, so that's that's uh. I think our 520 00:32:59,680 --> 00:33:02,160 Speaker 1: ridicul This takeaway here is that rock star behavior is 521 00:33:02,200 --> 00:33:04,920 Speaker 1: generally ridiculous, and we kind of expected to be ridiculous, 522 00:33:05,160 --> 00:33:08,040 Speaker 1: sometimes paid for it. We get peak ridiculous, like from 523 00:33:08,080 --> 00:33:11,000 Speaker 1: Billy Idol. Yeah. Um you and I know a lot 524 00:33:11,000 --> 00:33:15,800 Speaker 1: of musicians and my friends are musicians. Same. But what's 525 00:33:15,800 --> 00:33:23,760 Speaker 1: your craziest debauched musician story, like Billy Idol level crazy debauched. Well, no, 526 00:33:23,880 --> 00:33:27,480 Speaker 1: I can't tell that one. Now he will be embarrassed 527 00:33:27,480 --> 00:33:30,880 Speaker 1: by that. Uh oh no, okay, I got what I 528 00:33:30,920 --> 00:33:34,160 Speaker 1: got one. I can tell that will not compromise anyone's career. Okay. 529 00:33:35,120 --> 00:33:37,320 Speaker 1: When I was a boy in Atlanta, I was at 530 00:33:37,320 --> 00:33:40,200 Speaker 1: the Atlantos shopping mall. Right, Atlantic Shopping Mall is on 531 00:33:40,320 --> 00:33:43,440 Speaker 1: the buck Buckhead side of Atlanta. It's like a nice 532 00:33:43,440 --> 00:33:45,360 Speaker 1: shopping mall. So like when celebrities come to town, they 533 00:33:45,400 --> 00:33:48,400 Speaker 1: go to the Buckhead shopping mall. Right, So I'm there, 534 00:33:48,440 --> 00:33:49,920 Speaker 1: I'm with my dad, and you're like, wait a minute, 535 00:33:49,920 --> 00:33:51,920 Speaker 1: how is this the debauched musician story. You're a kid 536 00:33:51,920 --> 00:33:54,360 Speaker 1: with your dad in a shopping mall. Stay tuned. So 537 00:33:54,600 --> 00:33:57,800 Speaker 1: we're walking through the mall and we see this entourage 538 00:33:58,280 --> 00:34:01,200 Speaker 1: just people, and I don't, like, I'm six seven years old. 539 00:34:01,200 --> 00:34:03,280 Speaker 1: I don't really know. I just know that my dad 540 00:34:03,320 --> 00:34:05,280 Speaker 1: and how other people, all of the adults are acting. 541 00:34:05,520 --> 00:34:08,719 Speaker 1: This must be somebody cool. And I kind of go huh. 542 00:34:08,760 --> 00:34:10,279 Speaker 1: My dad takes me by the side and he goes 543 00:34:10,560 --> 00:34:13,120 Speaker 1: go over there and ask him for an autograph, and 544 00:34:13,160 --> 00:34:15,279 Speaker 1: I was like, he doesn't. He doesn't tell me who 545 00:34:15,320 --> 00:34:17,520 Speaker 1: it is. I guess he assumes I know who it is, 546 00:34:17,640 --> 00:34:20,000 Speaker 1: So that must be important because I can't really see 547 00:34:20,040 --> 00:34:25,200 Speaker 1: your dad doing that exactly. Never never wanted to be like, oh, 548 00:34:25,400 --> 00:34:27,800 Speaker 1: like I'm gonna I'm gonna go give attention to this celebrity. 549 00:34:27,800 --> 00:34:29,880 Speaker 1: That's not his game, right, So that he tells me 550 00:34:29,960 --> 00:34:31,680 Speaker 1: go over and ask him for an autograph, and I 551 00:34:31,719 --> 00:34:34,000 Speaker 1: was like, okay, pop. And so I walk over to 552 00:34:34,040 --> 00:34:36,399 Speaker 1: this entourage and they're still now they're coming at us. 553 00:34:36,520 --> 00:34:38,239 Speaker 1: So I walk over and right in front of them, 554 00:34:38,239 --> 00:34:40,960 Speaker 1: and I stopped the entourage. The entourage is very kind 555 00:34:41,000 --> 00:34:43,120 Speaker 1: about it. They stopped for this little boys looking up 556 00:34:43,160 --> 00:34:46,480 Speaker 1: at him. And I basically I noticed amongst the crowd 557 00:34:46,480 --> 00:34:49,080 Speaker 1: as it separates, this one figure in a white fur 558 00:34:49,160 --> 00:34:52,560 Speaker 1: coat and he looks down at me. And now I'm 559 00:34:52,600 --> 00:34:55,080 Speaker 1: six years old. I don't know what cocaine is, but 560 00:34:55,239 --> 00:34:58,960 Speaker 1: I know that this man is high as giraffe eyebrows 561 00:34:59,000 --> 00:35:03,000 Speaker 1: all right, And he says to me. I said, excuse me, 562 00:35:03,440 --> 00:35:06,239 Speaker 1: excuse me, Can I get your autograph? He looks at me. 563 00:35:06,239 --> 00:35:12,759 Speaker 1: He says I'm Rick James, of course, no. Yes. He said, 564 00:35:12,800 --> 00:35:16,520 Speaker 1: what's your name, little man? And I said Saren And 565 00:35:16,600 --> 00:35:19,480 Speaker 1: that's when I realized my dad wanted the autograph because 566 00:35:19,520 --> 00:35:23,600 Speaker 1: he has the same name. So I went over and 567 00:35:23,600 --> 00:35:25,799 Speaker 1: got an autograph from Rick James from my dad and 568 00:35:25,840 --> 00:35:28,319 Speaker 1: he still I assume have it. Because I don't have 569 00:35:28,360 --> 00:35:31,200 Speaker 1: that autograph. All I have is the memory of Rick 570 00:35:31,280 --> 00:35:34,439 Speaker 1: James highest draft eyebrows looking down at me, going I'm 571 00:35:34,520 --> 00:35:40,440 Speaker 1: Rick James of Crosses. It's incredible. So there you go. 572 00:35:40,480 --> 00:35:43,920 Speaker 1: There's a safely told debauched musician story. I love it. 573 00:35:43,960 --> 00:35:48,839 Speaker 1: That's perfect and perfect, perfect, ridiculous and that that just 574 00:35:50,000 --> 00:35:53,640 Speaker 1: you've seen us out beautifully on that one. Thank you 575 00:35:53,719 --> 00:35:58,080 Speaker 1: so much for that story. That's gonna stick in my 576 00:35:58,200 --> 00:36:02,319 Speaker 1: head for the rest of time. Uh, anyone listening. You 577 00:36:02,360 --> 00:36:06,480 Speaker 1: can find us online at Ridiculous Crime, both on Twitter 578 00:36:06,600 --> 00:36:10,080 Speaker 1: and Instagram. UM, if you've got a ridiculous crime that 579 00:36:10,480 --> 00:36:13,319 Speaker 1: you want to hear about a tip on one, or 580 00:36:13,320 --> 00:36:16,959 Speaker 1: if you want to confess, or if if you have 581 00:36:17,440 --> 00:36:22,160 Speaker 1: a really bonkers debauched rock star story that can top 582 00:36:22,280 --> 00:36:25,799 Speaker 1: Rick James, which it can't, so good luck, you can 583 00:36:25,880 --> 00:36:29,799 Speaker 1: email us at Ridiculous Crime at gmail dot com. I'm 584 00:36:29,880 --> 00:36:37,440 Speaker 1: zer Burnett, I'm Elizabeth Dutton. Thank you for listening by. 585 00:36:38,440 --> 00:36:41,480 Speaker 1: Ridiculous Crime is hosted by Elizabeth Dutton and Zaron Burnett, 586 00:36:41,680 --> 00:36:44,560 Speaker 1: produced and edited by Dave Poston. Research is by the 587 00:36:44,560 --> 00:36:47,879 Speaker 1: Intrepid Marissa Brown. The theme song is by Thomas Lee 588 00:36:48,000 --> 00:36:51,880 Speaker 1: and Travis Dutton. Executive producers are Ben Bolden and the 589 00:36:52,000 --> 00:36:59,800 Speaker 1: Old Brown. Ridiculous Crime is a production of my Heart Radio. 590 00:37:00,120 --> 00:37:02,480 Speaker 1: Four more podcasts my heart Radio visit the i heart 591 00:37:02,520 --> 00:37:05,239 Speaker 1: Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your 592 00:37:05,280 --> 00:37:06,000 Speaker 1: favorite shows.