Speaker 1: Are you single and feeling out of the loop? Put
Speaker 1: away that mouse and get out of the house. Join
Speaker 1: in the Loop, Seattle's brand new activities club just for singles.
Speaker 1: Put in the Loop singles dot Com today rooking Jim
Speaker 1: Bulls Second Date Update. It's always nerve racking to be
Speaker 1: back on the dating scene when you haven't dated in
Speaker 1: a while. We deal with a lot of people that
Speaker 1: have that problem on the second date update because they
Speaker 1: haven't dated for whatever reason, and you finally get it
Speaker 1: back out there and things are kind of difficult. That's
Speaker 1: the problem that the guy on the phone is having today.
Speaker 1: He hasn't dated in over two years for a very
Speaker 1: good reason. Darren, how are you. I'm doing good. How
Speaker 1: are you guys? Doing pretty good? Thanks for your email,
Speaker 1: Thanks for agreing to do a second date update. Now.
Speaker 1: You said that you hadn't dated in two years. Yeah,
Speaker 1: just about over two years because my wife had passed away.
Speaker 1: Oh man, Well, you know I had to take the time,
Speaker 1: and I felt like after that two years, I was
Speaker 1: ready to try to give it a go again. And
Speaker 1: so I did kind of what everybody does, and I
Speaker 1: got an online dating profile. Okay, and the girl that
Speaker 1: you want us to call today. What's her name? Her
Speaker 1: name is Stacy? Stacy, And what attracted you to Stacy
Speaker 1: on her internet dating profile? First and foremost, as though
Speaker 1: she was a very attractive girl, and I just really
Speaker 1: kind of liked how she represented herself there. And we
Speaker 1: sent a couple of messages back and forth, and then
Speaker 1: we agreed on having dinner. And can I ask this
Speaker 1: was your actual very first date since the passing of
Speaker 1: your wife two years ago. Yeah, first date in the
Speaker 1: past two years. It's got to be a lot of pressure,
Speaker 1: and it's got to feel weird to be back on
Speaker 1: the dating scene. I mean yeah, I mean I was nervous.
Speaker 1: There's no no question pull disclosure. I kind of had
Speaker 1: to psych myself up for it a little bit in
Speaker 1: the mirror, let myself know that this is going to happen.
Speaker 1: This is great. You're looking good. You know, you gave
Speaker 1: yourself like a coach's pep talk before before I set
Speaker 1: myself on the front line. Yeah, just a little bit
Speaker 1: doing whatever you gotta do. Man. I try and do
Speaker 1: that a little bit every day. I'm saying, just breathe,
Speaker 1: just breathe through it, get through dinner. It's gonna be great,
Speaker 1: you know, but I felt like I was ready and
Speaker 1: I felt like it actually went pretty well. We had
Speaker 1: good conversation, and I was a little sweaty. When you
Speaker 1: say a little sweaty, how sweaty do you mean? I
Speaker 1: mean I saw people going down my back. We could
Speaker 1: say that, I got but was it going down your forehead?
Speaker 1: And was your clothing soaked? I mean there was some wiping. Okay,
Speaker 1: all right, So you were sweaty and nervous. Do you
Speaker 1: think your date picked up on that? She did? I
Speaker 1: mean I was. I kind of had to acknowledge it
Speaker 1: after a little bit. Was there like one moment that
Speaker 1: stands out to you, is like the best moment of
Speaker 1: the date? Yeah, I guess A nice moment was just
Speaker 1: sitting that dinner when her entrees came and just I
Speaker 1: was nervous, and I knew I was putting that energy
Speaker 1: out there and there was a little bit of attention,
Speaker 1: and I just acknowledged it and said, hey, I'm nervous.
Speaker 1: You are really attractive and my fault my bad. And
Speaker 1: we were able to kind of laugh about it, and
Speaker 1: she said she understood, and you know, it just kind
Speaker 1: of changed how I felt about the evening, and I
Speaker 1: felt like she was understanding of the whole situation of
Speaker 1: my life. That's good. If you wasn't understanding about that,
Speaker 1: I wouldn't gonna want to be calling her back at all. Yeah, exactly, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean that's exactly how it felt. On a scale
Speaker 1: of one to ten. Since you've been out of the
Speaker 1: dating world for a little while, what would you give
Speaker 1: this date? I mean I I would give it a
Speaker 1: strong seven eight strong seven eight. Do you feel like
Speaker 1: she felt the same way, though, I mean, I mean
Speaker 1: I thought so, I really thought so. So that's I mean,
Speaker 1: that's why I emailed into the show. And how did
Speaker 1: you end things with her? I drove her back to
Speaker 1: her place and we were saying good night, and she
Speaker 1: had kind of put her hand out, and I'm gonna
Speaker 1: admit it was awkward. I'm awkward. I don't know. And
Speaker 1: I just I literally said out loud, or can we hug?
Speaker 1: And I just did it before I got an answer.
Speaker 1: Yesterday's all right. I think that's not necessarily a bad thing.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's a hug. It's not like you said
Speaker 1: screw it and just like started trying to make out
Speaker 1: with her. I mean, I'm six foot four and she's
Speaker 1: you know, got to be five four, so I'm much
Speaker 1: taller than her. All right, so she's tiny and you're
Speaker 1: a big duty. You just engulfed her with your big arms.
Speaker 1: I guess. So yeah, do you feel like that creeped
Speaker 1: her out? I hope it didn't. I feel like, you know,
Speaker 1: that's not going to end everything is a giant bear hug.
Speaker 1: I hope not. Honestly, I was like, you know, I
Speaker 1: gotta get out of here, not do something else, operate.
Speaker 1: How clear were you with her that this was like
Speaker 1: your first date and did you bring up that your
Speaker 1: wife had passed? Yeah, you know, we've brought it up
Speaker 1: just because she asked, like dating a lot? Or why
Speaker 1: are you dating? And I kind of had to bring
Speaker 1: it up. I didn't want to lie and have it
Speaker 1: to be something else, and so I just kind of
Speaker 1: mentioned it and she seemed okay with it. How many
Speaker 1: times have you tried to get ahold of her after
Speaker 1: your day? Well, like two days later, hadn't heard anything.
Speaker 1: So I sent her a text that was said, you know, hey,
Speaker 1: it was great to see you. How's your tad going?
Speaker 1: And uh, I didn't hear anything. So I was like, well,
Speaker 1: maybe I should give her a call. So I gave
Speaker 1: her one call and left her voice message that was
Speaker 1: basically the same. You send her another text like what
Speaker 1: about the hug? Don't you remember the great hug? How
Speaker 1: dare you do this to me? Even though I did
Speaker 1: not bring that up again? Okay, do you do anything?
Speaker 1: I mean, you haven't dated in two years? Why not
Speaker 1: just like chuck this one up to? Well, that was
Speaker 1: the first time out. We're going to give it another
Speaker 1: go with somebody else next. It just felt right, It
Speaker 1: felt right, and you know, I figured if I think
Speaker 1: it feels right, I should probably go after them. Okay,
Speaker 1: well we'll play a song comeback Caller, and then get
Speaker 1: your second date update. Okay, all right, so I'm good,
Speaker 1: all right brooking jubil in the morning second date. I
Speaker 1: don't make this promise very often in second date updates,
Speaker 1: but I promised that I'm gonna get the guy who's
Speaker 1: on the phone a second date today. What Yeah, I
Speaker 1: promise him, no matter what, because I like him. He's
Speaker 1: a nice guy, He's been through some stuff, and he
Speaker 1: deserves to get a date, if not with the girl
Speaker 1: that we're about to call for him with somebody who
Speaker 1: texts in I don't know, or if I have to
Speaker 1: put on a dress and go on on a date
Speaker 1: with him, I don't care. I am guaranteeing Darren that
Speaker 1: you are going to get a date out of this
Speaker 1: phone call we're about to make, Okay, I hope, So
Speaker 1: all right, you know what, I kind of hope, she says, no,
Speaker 1: so that I can go out with Yeah. If you're
Speaker 1: just tuning in for the second day up date, Darren
Speaker 1: wants us to call a girl named Stacy. They met online.
Speaker 1: He hasn't dated in a couple of years for good reason.
Speaker 1: His wife passed away and he was ready to date again,
Speaker 1: so he decided to go online and he met Stacy
Speaker 1: day went out for dinner. He was a little bit
Speaker 1: nervous and that showed He's sweating and just a little
Speaker 1: like awkward during the whole date. He says. The date
Speaker 1: ended with a very big, sweaty hug from him, that
Speaker 1: she didn't really seem like she wanted. So, Darren, you're
Speaker 1: ready to make the phone call? Oh yeah, let's do
Speaker 1: it all right, man, here we go. Be confident. He've
Speaker 1: got one hundred percent guaranteed success. Sorry, yeah, look at
Speaker 1: it this way. It doesn't matter what she says, Darren,
Speaker 1: You're still getting a date. Could be with a dude,
Speaker 1: but you're still getting a date. I mean, I am
Speaker 1: a big fan. There you go. Okay, I'm gonna dial
Speaker 1: the phone of her right now so we can get
Speaker 1: her on the phone. Hello, Alli, can I speak to
Speaker 1: Stacy please? This is Stacy. Hey Stacy, how are you?
Speaker 1: This is Jewel from Brook and Jewel in the Morning. Um,
Speaker 1: it's okay, it's I'm fine. Good, it's good to hear.
Speaker 1: Just calling to check in on you. See how you're doing.
Speaker 1: Courtesy call. Do you ever listen to our show at all? Um?
Speaker 1: I think so. I've listened to a few times. My
Speaker 1: mom really likes it. Cool, all right, how old your mom? Nice?
Speaker 1: That's who we're going for. We kill it the sixty
Speaker 1: one year old mom. So she's the right person that
Speaker 1: we want listening. Stacy, have you ever heard of second
Speaker 1: date update before? What does that mean? That means that
Speaker 1: you recently went out on a date with somebody who
Speaker 1: listens to the show and you haven't been calling them
Speaker 1: back since your date. So they emailed us to get
Speaker 1: you on the phone and ask if they did something wrong. Wow,
Speaker 1: that's weird. It is kind of weird, but it is
Speaker 1: a segment that we do on our show. And the
Speaker 1: guy's name is Darren. Do you remember going out with Darren? Yeah? Yeah, Okay,
Speaker 1: did you like Darren? M Yeah? Yeah, I did. You
Speaker 1: sound very hesitant, Stacy, No, he was weet. I remember
Speaker 1: he was really nice and yeah, it was a fine time. Okay.
Speaker 1: If it was a fine time, why haven't you called
Speaker 1: him back after he's texted you and tried to call you? Um,
Speaker 1: I don't want to, like, you know, put all his
Speaker 1: business out there, but like it was. I think that
Speaker 1: maybe we're just not you know, we're kind of a
Speaker 1: different points in our life in regards to the dating
Speaker 1: and things like that. Well, in regards to the putting
Speaker 1: his whole business out there. We talked to Darren and
Speaker 1: he told us everything that he hasn't dated in a
Speaker 1: while because his wife passed away. He also said that
Speaker 1: he was very nervous the entire time and was sweaty
Speaker 1: and gave you an awkward hug at the end of
Speaker 1: the day. You know, It's like, I don't know, I
Speaker 1: always think like you get nervous at the beginning of
Speaker 1: the date and you kind of ease into it, but
Speaker 1: it seems kind of like the opposite for him, Like
Speaker 1: he got more nervous as the date went on. You know,
Speaker 1: he was like the most nervous at the very end.
Speaker 1: And you know he like straight up like I asked
Speaker 1: for you he can d me, and then before I
Speaker 1: could respond, he just did it right. You can understand
Speaker 1: the nerves, though, if the dude hasn't dated for two
Speaker 1: years because of something like sure, yeah, and I you know,
Speaker 1: I don't have like any will towards him at all.
Speaker 1: I just don't think we're really compatible in that way.
Speaker 1: I think, yeah, but he was just nervous. He hasn't
Speaker 1: been out in two years. Look, Stacey, I really want
Speaker 1: to get him a second date with you. That's my
Speaker 1: goal here is to make you go out with him
Speaker 1: again and give him one more shot. Yeah, is to
Speaker 1: force you to go out with him again. Yeah. I mean,
Speaker 1: like I totally understand the nerves. But it was like
Speaker 1: we were talking about his ex wife, and you know,
Speaker 1: I'm completely understanding. I know how it goes. But like
Speaker 1: essentially what he said was that she is watching over
Speaker 1: him all the time, which at first I thought was
Speaker 1: kind of sweet. And then he said that throughout the
Speaker 1: date he could feel her like aura or her spirit
Speaker 1: at the dinner table, judging me, judging you. Did he
Speaker 1: actually say the words judging you? Yes, he said the
Speaker 1: word judging me, and it freaked me out, like as
Speaker 1: if her spirit is jealous or as in she's hoping
Speaker 1: things go well. I took it as like she was
Speaker 1: like jealous, like she was judging me, Like how dare
Speaker 1: thinking that? I'm like, you know, some easy girl, you know,
Speaker 1: trying to pick up a dude. You know. Maybe, yeah,
Speaker 1: maybe he said it wrong. I feel like her presence
Speaker 1: is around me all the time and she would want
Speaker 1: me to be doing this. It look it's it's probably
Speaker 1: a weird thing to say either way, but I doubt
Speaker 1: he was saying, like, my wife who passed away is
Speaker 1: sitting next to me right now. Her spirit is and
Speaker 1: it thinks you're a skank, Like I doubt that's why
Speaker 1: he met by that space. Regardless of any of it,
Speaker 1: it just really creeped me out. Did you say anything
Speaker 1: to him after he brought up the dead wife judging you? No,
Speaker 1: he was just weird. It was just really creepy, and
Speaker 1: I think he just needs to take some time, Stacy.
Speaker 1: I hate to get weird on you too, but there
Speaker 1: is another presence that's listening to this phone call right now.
Speaker 1: What do you mean? I mean that Darren is actually
Speaker 1: on the phone and heard everything that you just said.
Speaker 1: Are you kidding me? No, I'm not. Hey, look I'm
Speaker 1: I didn't. I had no idea that you would like
Speaker 1: be listening to this. They called me out of nowhere,
Speaker 1: you know, like I'm sorry. I mean, they're okay, Like
Speaker 1: are you really upset? Like I mean, you know always,
Speaker 1: I mean, it's fine, it's good. I guess, well, I'm
Speaker 1: really sorry, but I know that you were really nervous,
Speaker 1: and like I you know, I felt like I was
Speaker 1: as patient as I possibly could be. But it's just
Speaker 1: kind of weird. You know. It's weird to like go
Speaker 1: on a date with somebody and like have the person
Speaker 1: say that they're dead. Wife is judging me? You know.
Speaker 1: It's like my uncle passed away last year, and I
Speaker 1: can't just say, like, oh my uncle Bob is you
Speaker 1: know judging you. You have to understand how that would
Speaker 1: freak someone out. Well, but it was like a good thing,
Speaker 1: like she was it was good that she was there
Speaker 1: and good that like she approved of you, you know,
Speaker 1: like she liked you, And I felt like if she
Speaker 1: liked you, then this is a good thing. That's kind
Speaker 1: of weird, Okay, I just don't want to know what
Speaker 1: your ex wife is thinking. Well, can we do it again?
Speaker 1: And like we can go out again? And I mean
Speaker 1: I could leave her at home, you know, could we
Speaker 1: can we make it happen? Look, Darren, like the whole
Speaker 1: spiritual thing, like it just kind of freaked me out. Look, Stacy,
Speaker 1: you're really screwing the second date up date up for
Speaker 1: me because I promised Darren that I would get him
Speaker 1: a second date with you. Will you go out with
Speaker 1: Darren one more time? I will pay for a second date. No,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I appreciate it. I appreciate your time. But now, okay, Well,
Speaker 1: at least Darren learned a little bit of a lesson here.
Speaker 1: And you know, sure, next time you go out on
Speaker 1: a date, don't bring your dead wife's spirit or just
Speaker 1: make her wait in the car or something. And I'm
Speaker 1: saying that because you know, the promise I made you
Speaker 1: at the beginning of this was you were going to
Speaker 1: get a second date with somebody, no matter who it is,
Speaker 1: and I don't want you to be awkward when you
Speaker 1: and I go out. It looks like I gotta pick
Speaker 1: out a nice evening dress, don't I. Darren, you better
Speaker 1: look nice in the morning.