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Speaker 1: Call it what it is with Jessica Capshaw and Camil

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Speaker 1: Luddington an iHeartRadio podcast.

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Speaker 2: Well, Hello, Hello, hello in person, Hello Amberson Magic brought

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Speaker 2: me on a plane from New York to LA and

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Speaker 2: we're here to party.

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Speaker 3: That was just that was good.

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Speaker 4: That was really good.

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Speaker 3: Okay, Jessica and I.

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Speaker 5: Jessica is here in the Los Angeles studio. How does

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Speaker 5: it feel to be back in Los Angeles, back.

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Speaker 3: In your loving arms? Great?

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Speaker 4: Great? Great?

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Speaker 1: It was you know, it was a day of travel yesterday.

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Speaker 1: And I still have this very nerdy part of me

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Speaker 1: that like, when I get on a plane from JFK

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Speaker 1: to l A, I think, because that's such a common

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Speaker 1: flight padder for people who are I don't know, in entertainment. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I always think like what am I.

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Speaker 2: Going to see?

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Speaker 4: Like?

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Speaker 3: Am I going to see somebody?

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Speaker 1: Is it going to be like there would be a

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Speaker 1: celebrity on my plane?

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Speaker 4: Is there anybody?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Who Viola Davis?

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Speaker 4: Wait?

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Speaker 1: Really? Yes?

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Speaker 3: And here's the crazy part.

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Speaker 1: Normally I go, I go, I go a little Instagram

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Speaker 1: heavy on flights, like flight days. I end up just

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Speaker 1: like that's for some reason, my scroll, my divert diversion.

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Speaker 1: I don't know diversion, I don't know anyways. Okay, that's

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Speaker 1: what I go to when in doubt or when any

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Speaker 1: boredom sneaks in. Evidently, yeah, not the two actual books

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Speaker 1: that I have sitting there read me.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So I went on Instagram, and I love Viola Davis's account.

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Speaker 1: She's so inspiring and I really I'm always picking up

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Speaker 1: what she's putting down.

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Speaker 3: I love it, love love. And also for people that

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Speaker 3: don't know, she's shondahland Family.

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Speaker 2: Yes she is.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, yes she is.

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Speaker 1: And I just think she's one of the most incredible

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Speaker 1: actors that's ever lived. Anyways, So I she did this

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Speaker 1: slide show of these quotes that I just found so inspiring,

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Speaker 1: so super inspiring. So I had just been looking at

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Speaker 1: them and really like moved by them, and I was

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Speaker 1: going to repost and everything else. So here's what.

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Speaker 3: Were you honestly looking before she was on a flight.

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Speaker 1: Yes, I mean before the flight, and I actually took

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Speaker 1: screenshots because I was going to post repost it, and

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Speaker 1: so here we are Viola Davis. And one of the

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Speaker 1: first ones was people who have been hurt but refused

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Speaker 1: to hurt others in the same way. Please never change

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Speaker 1: people who who use kindness as a way of life,

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Speaker 1: not a strategy. Please never change. But they were just

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Speaker 1: so beautiful and I was very moved by them. And

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Speaker 1: then I got up to go to bathroom mid flight,

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Speaker 1: and I came back and all of a sudden, she

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Speaker 1: was there, sitting there, and I probably looked scared or

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Speaker 1: panicked or I didn't know what to do. Yeah, I

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Speaker 1: don't know her personally, I know, I.

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Speaker 4: Don't ever No, so I've never met her.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but again, as we've talked about before, sometimes what

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Speaker 1: happens to us is that people you think you know

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Speaker 1: some one because they just look so familiar in that moment.

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Speaker 1: But then I had to say to myself self, you

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Speaker 1: don't know her, don't.

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Speaker 5: We've just done the boundaries, so I'm not going to

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Speaker 5: cross the boundary. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So anyways, I went back to my seat, but I

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Speaker 1: couldn't contain myself and I wasn't with anyone I need.

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Speaker 1: So I looked at my seat mate.

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Speaker 3: She's a poor guy, and I was like, that's why, which,

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Speaker 3: of course.

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Speaker 2: It was.

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Speaker 1: He looked like he could handle it.

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Speaker 6: Look he didn't look like he.

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Speaker 1: Was going to jump out of his seat talk to her,

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Speaker 1: like I love.

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Speaker 3: That you're pointing out to other people.

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Speaker 1: It was radically weird.

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Speaker 5: I feel like in that situation, because you're shawna Land family,

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Speaker 5: you could say, Hi, I don't think it's a.

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Speaker 3: Can you beat me? Okay viol for shondaland family.

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Speaker 4: I'm not Shonda Shonda.

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Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, g I d no, no, no, no, no, no, no, really,

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Speaker 1: but you know what me and me and be would

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Speaker 1: be best friends by now. It was you missed the opportunity.

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Speaker 1: What in real life you would actually do. I just

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Speaker 1: want to throw that out there, like, I think, like,

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Speaker 1: this is a nice little performance.

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Speaker 3: What would you really do?

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Speaker 1: I don't think you would.

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Speaker 5: No, I have to really think, like, really, I'm passing

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Speaker 5: the seat, and I do continue on walking.

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Speaker 3: I continue on walking. You're right, I passed.

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Speaker 1: I do.

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Speaker 3: I do a pause, I do a side eye, and

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Speaker 3: then I just keep on going.

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Speaker 1: Well, I fangirled and I and I kept it to

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Speaker 1: myself and I just continued, you know, flapping my wings

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Speaker 1: to fly, and then landed and then got in and

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Speaker 1: went and had a little quick bite with a friend

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Speaker 1: and then passed me past. Not you, not you. I'm

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Speaker 1: very excited about our guest today, but I really really

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Speaker 1: really love Beanie. Felstie.

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Speaker 3: You love Beanie and you haven't worked with Beanie.

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Speaker 1: No, I didn't get to work with her.

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Speaker 3: But she's a big Rais Anatomy fan about it, and

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Speaker 3: she was on our show.

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Speaker 7: Oh, we have a million more things to talk to

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Speaker 7: her about.

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Speaker 5: Hi.

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Speaker 1: Oh, it's so much better having a two way conversation.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's way more fun. It's way more fun.

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Speaker 6: Okay, Beanie Panie.

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Speaker 1: To call it what it is, Yes, thank you for

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Speaker 1: having me. Oh my gosh, of course. Where are you

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Speaker 1: right now? Where in the world are you?

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Speaker 4: I am in New York, and I thought you were

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Speaker 4: in New York, but you just went back to La.

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Speaker 1: I came back to La for this and some other work.

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Speaker 3: And so to say what the other thing is.

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Speaker 1: I mean I can. But I for a period of

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Speaker 1: time lived with my grandma Nina in Missouri, and then

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Speaker 1: I would always spend you know, tons of time with

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Speaker 1: her in the summers and everything. She was my beloved, beloved,

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Speaker 1: and she would watch maybe thousands of hours of Wheel

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Speaker 1: of Fortune and pretty much a ton of other game

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Speaker 1: shows and like daytime soap operas whatever. Anyways, so I've

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Speaker 1: watched at least five hundred episodes, five hundred hours of

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Speaker 1: Wheel of Fortune, and Pat Sajack, who's the host of

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Speaker 1: that show, is retiring and Ryan Seacrest is coming in

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Speaker 1: and they're doing like a Celebrity last week with Pat Sajack.

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Speaker 1: And I got this email and I was like, heck, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'll be there, and then all of a sudden it

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Speaker 1: hit me that I have to play the game. And

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Speaker 1: I was like, oh, I was never good. She would

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Speaker 1: guess everything. I would guess nothing. So I'm actually just

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Speaker 1: now like low key terrified. Yeah.

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Speaker 4: This is actually couldn't be a better segue, because that

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Speaker 4: basically is exactly how I felt about being ungrazy.

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Speaker 5: Now.

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Speaker 6: I was like, this is my actual dream come true.

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Speaker 4: And then I was like, oh wait, I actually.

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Speaker 6: Have to act.

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Speaker 4: I don't want to ask.

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Speaker 6: I just want to be there. I don't I just

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Speaker 6: want to sit.

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Speaker 4: I just like look at everything. And that's exactly how

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Speaker 4: I And so when you.

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Speaker 1: Went out there was it were you? How did that

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Speaker 1: nervousness last or did you just go.

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Speaker 4: See the entire time?

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Speaker 3: Really did.

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Speaker 4: Oh my god? I was running around like I was

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Speaker 4: thinking about this this morning. I was like I was

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Speaker 4: running around like a chicken with my head cut off,

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Speaker 4: and I couldn't have been met with more love and

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Speaker 4: enthusiasm from everybody that works there. I was like, can

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Speaker 4: I go to Meredith's house?

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Speaker 3: Can I go to the or can I look in can?

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Speaker 4: I was like literally having an anxiety attack of joy

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Speaker 4: the entire time, and everyone was so nice to me.

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Speaker 4: And I was also thinking how glad I was to

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Speaker 4: be on it before COVID because I was alowd to

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Speaker 4: like run around and look at everything, and I wasn't like,

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Speaker 4: were you before COVID right before? So it was like

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Speaker 4: January twenty twenty and it was after.

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Speaker 1: I was there, so we didn't get to overlap.

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Speaker 4: I know, I remember, I wouldn't have been able to Honestly,

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Speaker 4: I wouldn't have been able to emotionally.

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Speaker 1: It would have been honestly too much overlooked.

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Speaker 4: I was grateful to not have any scenes with Bailey

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Speaker 4: because I just wouldn't have able to do it emotionally.

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Speaker 4: And then at one point I was filming with the

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Speaker 4: chief Jim and Jim and I they were like, we

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Speaker 4: can't see her. Can we put her on a Bailey box?

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Speaker 3: And I'm like, You're like, can I take it a

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Speaker 3: whole box.

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Speaker 4: You're called Bailey Box.

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Speaker 1: And You're like, you're like on the same box, and

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Speaker 1: I was like, I get to stand up her.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, extremely short and doing scenes with a very tall,

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Speaker 4: beautiful man, and it was the best moment of my

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Speaker 4: whole existence. Pretty loved that.

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Speaker 1: That's how I came to the show too. I was

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Speaker 1: already a fan before I came on. So I know

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Speaker 1: exactly how you feel.

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Speaker 4: I know too much about both of your journeys on

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Speaker 4: to you auditioned like three times, whole story, you know,

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Speaker 4: the scaring you know, I am a super bad Why

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Speaker 4: do you think? I mean? I love you both. Also

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Speaker 4: just in the Super Bowl.

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Speaker 1: Okay, so we were catching up before you came on,

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Speaker 1: and I was sharing that because you obviously are in

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Speaker 1: New York LA as well, and that when you get

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Speaker 1: on that flight from JFK to LA, how it's always

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Speaker 1: sort of like are you going to see a celebrity

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Speaker 1: because there's so many If you want to find celebrities people,

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Speaker 1: they're on the flights from JFK to LA.

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Speaker 4: I don't want to like out Mark Ruffalo for being

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Speaker 4: a Delta person, but like, actually, every time I'm on

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Speaker 4: a flight from LA to New York, or vice versa.

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Speaker 4: Mark Ruffalo is there and I've never spoken to him,

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Speaker 4: but I just love him from Afar and I'm like,

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Speaker 4: he's so handsome, he looks beautiful, and he's wearing like

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Speaker 4: sort of a lavender scarf.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, oh my god, he's wearing a lavender scarf on

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Speaker 3: a flight.

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Speaker 4: But he's similarly Delta loyal and I and I appreciate it.

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Speaker 3: I see it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, were you on Delta. I was on Delta.

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Speaker 1: I saw Viola Davis.

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Speaker 4: I mean I.

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Speaker 1: Almost passed out, so I said, I saw I came

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Speaker 1: out of the bathroom and then we made eye contact,

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Speaker 1: and I don't think she knew had only pretty. She

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Speaker 1: did not know who I was. I knew who she was,

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Speaker 1: so I looked terrified, right because I'm like, and then

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Speaker 1: I just realized that I don't really know her, so

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Speaker 1: I can't say anything. And we've talked a lot about that.

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Speaker 6: R Yeah.

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Speaker 5: I mean we've just done this whole episode about Boundaries,

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Speaker 5: and we talked about chapol Rone coming out right and

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Speaker 5: saying like, hey, I.

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Speaker 3: Need my space.

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Speaker 1: Do you know their line?

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Speaker 3: Do you know about this?

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Speaker 4: Yes, I've seen I've seen this.

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Speaker 3: Yes, I there's some discourse around it.

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Speaker 5: We were talking about how we are both fans of people,

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Speaker 5: and then we also, because of the show, have a fandom,

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Speaker 5: and we've talked about the boundaries.

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Speaker 3: So Jessica, in that moment.

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Speaker 5: It was it was a hard bound I forgot your boundary,

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Speaker 5: but then you remembered them.

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Speaker 1: I wanted to cross a boundary. I then recognized that

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Speaker 1: I should not and that I was not going to,

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Speaker 1: and then I didn't. I self corrected, not that I

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Speaker 1: would have done anything. By the way, it feel like

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Speaker 1: I was gonna jump into her lap while she was

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Speaker 1: sitting there and be like, tell me everything.

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Speaker 3: I mean, I just love a few Vodkas into the flight.

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Speaker 1: Oh no.

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Speaker 4: I always have a lot of like love and empathy

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Speaker 4: for people that if people ever talk to me, because

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Speaker 4: I'm like, I am also that person. Yeah, like I

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Speaker 4: feel that way now with you guys, like with you

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Speaker 4: feel so excited that sometimes I just have to say

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Speaker 4: hi and I I So I have a lot of

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Speaker 4: empathy for people that do that. It's just I guess

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Speaker 4: about how you do it.

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Speaker 1: That's what we were discussed because I was also saying

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Speaker 1: that I flew from Italy to New York at the

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Speaker 1: end of the summer and I was with three of

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Speaker 1: my kids and there were there were a bunch of

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Speaker 1: people who asked for pictures, and I was like, I

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Speaker 1: mean get yes, of course, okay, yes, and I just

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Speaker 1: was great, meanwhile, look like hammer shit, like definitely in

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Speaker 1: my travel self whatever. And every time they say to

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Speaker 1: take a picture, like I guess I'd like, I just

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Speaker 1: be like, yeah, okay, great. So you think because back

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Speaker 1: in the day that would just be a picture that

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Speaker 1: they send their mom or the person that they watch

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Speaker 1: graz Anatomy with or whatever. And it's like that it

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Speaker 1: just lives there. Well no, no, not anymore now. It

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Speaker 1: truly like my like it pops up everywhere, yeah.

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Speaker 5: On Instagram And it's like Phoanie, what do you get

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Speaker 5: when you're out in the wild?

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Speaker 3: What what do people approach you for?

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Speaker 4: The most Well, I have this running joke where like,

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Speaker 4: if uh, a man approaches me, they I know just

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Speaker 4: off the bat that they're going to talk about something

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Speaker 4: that I was only a very very small part of

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Speaker 4: part of but has a very loyal fan base and

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Speaker 4: it's such a wonderful project. But it's called What We

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Speaker 4: Do in the Shadows, which is like.

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Speaker 6: A credible and if a man.

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Speaker 4: Approaches me, like truly, nine and a half times out

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Speaker 4: of ten, they're like Jenna from What We Are show,

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Speaker 4: I eventually become a vampire. I get by Natasha's character,

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Speaker 4: and I was as Wenda is obviously, and it's such

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Speaker 4: a lovely time. And I learned so much doing that

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Speaker 4: show because they are so funny and like absolutely brilliant improvisers.

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Speaker 4: So it's just such a masterclass for me. But I

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Speaker 4: was only on it, I think, for like six or

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Speaker 4: seven episodes right at the beginning of the show. But

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Speaker 4: if a man comes up to me, I'm like, if

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Speaker 4: you want to talk about Jennel, don't you. And it's

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Speaker 4: very lovely, but it's very consistent, and otherwise I would

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Speaker 4: I don't know, I feel so embarrassed even talking about

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Speaker 4: stuff like this, but I would probably say books.

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Speaker 1: I feel it's got to be. It's so good.

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Speaker 3: I just was.

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Speaker 4: I was just with Caitlin Deaver, who's like truly family

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Speaker 4: to me, and we went on like a little girls trip,

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Speaker 4: just the two of us, and it was really magical

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Speaker 4: and very very special, and just we were reminiscing about

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Speaker 4: all of our times together and filming and how magical

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Speaker 4: it was. And I think she truly is like the

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Speaker 4: Meryl Streep. She's younger than me, but I'll say my

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Speaker 4: gunnery younger than me. I think she's Meryl, Like, I

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Speaker 4: think she kind of can actually accomplish anything and make

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Speaker 4: it believable and so human and so open and funny

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Speaker 4: and just I think she's so gifted. So I learnt

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Speaker 4: so much from her.

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Speaker 1: I think that everything you said is true in my

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Speaker 1: opinion as well and from my perspective. But as I'm

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Speaker 1: listening to say that, I think that what I hear

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Speaker 1: the most is the friendship piece. Like when you're really

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Speaker 1: really in such a strong relationship, when you're in such

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Speaker 1: a distant friendship with someone, isn't it sort of true

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Speaker 1: that you just think that they are the best? Like

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Speaker 1: I look at this one all the time, and as

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Speaker 1: much as I make fun of her, I'm like, she's

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Speaker 1: the best she can. Yeah, every room she walks into

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Speaker 1: she makes better, her laugh makes she doesn't even have

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Speaker 1: to be funny for her, so she can just laugh

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Speaker 1: and then I'll start laughing. See, And I think that

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Speaker 1: that's just such a gift.

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Speaker 3: No, it's it makes work by the way it makes

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Speaker 3: work not work.

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Speaker 4: YEA, yeah, I kind of felt. Yeah, I couldn't agree more.

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Speaker 4: And I think, you know, it was such a kind

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Speaker 4: of wild risk that we did, which was that we

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Speaker 4: decided to live together after meeting each other twice, and

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Speaker 4: so we lived together while we were filming.

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Speaker 1: Which wow, came back.

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Speaker 4: Could have gone so wrong, but it.

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Speaker 3: Went oh so right in chemistry, right.

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Speaker 4: We were just like together truly twenty four to seven,

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Speaker 4: going to work together, coming home from work together, eating

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Speaker 4: pancakes in our kitchen of the apartment we were in

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Speaker 4: and running lines and just really getting to know each

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Speaker 4: other on like a cellular level.

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Speaker 1: The way that relationship, I'm like flashing to it because

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Speaker 1: you guys were both so winning in it, and I

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Speaker 1: think that maybe the biggest piece for me was that

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Speaker 1: it was truly an example of vulnerability as strength. You

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Speaker 1: both were such strong, strong, strong characters. You were so.

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Speaker 6: Entirely who you were and.

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Speaker 1: Let us know everything that you thought was going to

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Speaker 1: go wrong or that you felt like there was something

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Speaker 1: missing or that you weren't good enough or whatever, and

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Speaker 1: it was just such a window into that dynamic that happens.

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Speaker 1: And again both of you see each other as just

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Speaker 1: the person who hung the moon.

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Speaker 4: Right, Yeah, yeah, thank you, that's so kind. Yeah, I think,

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Speaker 4: you know, I relate a lot to my character. Obviously

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Speaker 4: I'm so much older now, but I think like I

355
00:16:28,880 --> 00:16:33,360
Speaker 4: have that and want to find control in things and

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Speaker 4: that sort of need to feel in control, and really

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Speaker 4: the trick of life is like we're never in control,

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Speaker 4: and yeah, don't get that privileged. So I really empathized

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Speaker 4: with Mollie and sort of her obsession with doing the

360
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Speaker 4: right thing and and being in control of every situation

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Speaker 4: and then learning to just kind of unravel that.

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Speaker 1: As when do you feel out of control when like

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Speaker 1: what are the places where you're Oh, I I don't

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Speaker 1: like to do that. I don't want to move towards that.

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Speaker 4: I don't love flying, but not for the reasons that

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Speaker 4: you might think. I am like pretty severely hospital bound,

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Speaker 4: hospital bound, allergic to cats, and people can bring their

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Speaker 4: cats on airplanes down and it has created an anxiety

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Speaker 4: in me that like truly permeates any travel experience because

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Speaker 4: people can bring My wife and I have this joke

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Speaker 4: that like every cat is named mister Pickles, and so

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Speaker 4: we're like mister Pickles can just like come on the

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Speaker 4: plane whenever whenever he wants, and I have to take

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Speaker 4: like insane amounts of his to me, and I feel

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Speaker 4: very out of it. And if I'm myself traveling for work,

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Speaker 4: I feel very like out of control because I'm on

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Speaker 4: like three benadryl and fours your tech and buy the Libra.

378
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Speaker 4: And it's just like, wait, I have a kind if.

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Speaker 5: You're super allergic or something on a flight, can you

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Speaker 5: flag it before you get on a flight? Can you

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Speaker 5: say I'm alert to cats?

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Speaker 4: No?

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00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:04,440
Speaker 5: You could just misters could be your seat mate.

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Speaker 4: Mister Pickles has more rights than I do. I've learned

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Speaker 4: this over time, So like the person with the allergy

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Speaker 4: has to get off the plane, not the person with

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Speaker 4: the animals. Mister and miss and my wife and I

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Speaker 4: was like running bit of like mister Pickles strikes again,

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Speaker 4: or like one, mister Pickle zero.

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Speaker 1: Is a very good excuse to write private air travel

391
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Speaker 1: into your contract.

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Speaker 3: Totally. Wait, I have a question. Have you been on

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Speaker 3: a flight and there's been a Pickles?

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Speaker 6: So how did you know?

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Speaker 4: I I either get off if I feel like emotionally

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Speaker 4: I can't do it that day, or I just take

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Speaker 4: if I'm with someone I feel safe enough that I

398
00:18:47,280 --> 00:18:50,080
Speaker 4: take like two Bena drills and times three, and then

399
00:18:50,119 --> 00:18:50,880
Speaker 4: I have an EpiPen.

400
00:18:51,840 --> 00:18:54,760
Speaker 1: I always do this. Allergic to cats your whole life.

401
00:18:54,840 --> 00:18:56,400
Speaker 3: I'm pretty allergic to you. You're allergic.

402
00:18:57,880 --> 00:19:02,240
Speaker 1: No, I'm not really allergic to stuff. Oh yeah, there

403
00:19:02,280 --> 00:19:02,640
Speaker 1: we go.

404
00:19:03,280 --> 00:19:04,160
Speaker 6: Seeven.

405
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Speaker 4: I know when she's perfect. I'm just not allergic.

406
00:19:07,760 --> 00:19:12,600
Speaker 1: Gad, you're not Jewish honorarily on some level. I got

407
00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:14,280
Speaker 1: my I got my twenty three and me back and

408
00:19:14,400 --> 00:19:17,400
Speaker 1: it was so I get it done and and you're right,

409
00:19:17,680 --> 00:19:20,840
Speaker 1: it comes back and it's like all German, English, whatever,

410
00:19:21,280 --> 00:19:24,359
Speaker 1: and then it gives you like little updates and I

411
00:19:24,400 --> 00:19:26,720
Speaker 1: get an update, an update in my twenty three meets.

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00:19:26,720 --> 00:19:28,840
Speaker 1: So I log in and look at it. I'm one

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Speaker 1: percent Jewish.

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00:19:29,800 --> 00:19:30,520
Speaker 6: How did they wait?

415
00:19:30,920 --> 00:19:32,119
Speaker 1: I was ready for a bum mitzvah.

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00:19:32,200 --> 00:19:33,359
Speaker 6: No, let's do that.

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00:19:33,520 --> 00:19:37,880
Speaker 3: Jessica doesn't make any sense. I know, like, why are

418
00:19:37,920 --> 00:19:39,320
Speaker 3: they updating your blood?

419
00:19:40,400 --> 00:19:40,520
Speaker 2: You know?

420
00:19:40,600 --> 00:19:43,399
Speaker 5: I mean like just run it to the machine and

421
00:19:43,440 --> 00:19:46,280
Speaker 5: then it's like, wait a second, we discovered this week?

422
00:19:47,080 --> 00:19:49,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, that are updates on it.

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00:19:49,520 --> 00:19:51,560
Speaker 1: Because there's things I don't ask questions about, and this

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00:19:51,560 --> 00:19:53,720
Speaker 1: would be one of them. Oh okay, can we talk

425
00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:57,520
Speaker 1: about when you were younger for a second. Yeah, okay,

426
00:19:57,560 --> 00:20:01,399
Speaker 1: so Beanie was always allergic to cats? Yes, have you

427
00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:04,560
Speaker 1: always been Beanie? Is everyone always called you Beanie?

428
00:20:05,119 --> 00:20:07,199
Speaker 4: That's a great question. So I've been Beanie since I

429
00:20:07,280 --> 00:20:10,760
Speaker 4: was like maybe like exclusively Beanie, probably around like six

430
00:20:10,800 --> 00:20:14,959
Speaker 4: months old. But my real name is Elizabeth. I know.

431
00:20:15,240 --> 00:20:18,320
Speaker 4: And my real name is Elizabeth. And this is actually

432
00:20:18,359 --> 00:20:22,399
Speaker 4: quite funny because the baby nurse my mom. I'm her

433
00:20:22,440 --> 00:20:24,960
Speaker 4: third kid, and by the time I was born, she

434
00:20:25,080 --> 00:20:28,320
Speaker 4: had a baby nurse and the baby nurse was British

435
00:20:28,359 --> 00:20:31,399
Speaker 4: and she came up with the nickname ELIZABETHI.

436
00:20:31,080 --> 00:20:32,600
Speaker 6: Oh, that's cute.

437
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:34,639
Speaker 4: She was like, I used to I call you know,

438
00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:37,040
Speaker 4: there's a million Elizabeths in England. I call all my

439
00:20:37,080 --> 00:20:41,639
Speaker 4: Elizabeths Lisbani. It's a popular nickname. Then flash forward twenty

440
00:20:41,640 --> 00:20:44,520
Speaker 4: five years later. I meet the person who is now

441
00:20:44,560 --> 00:20:49,960
Speaker 4: my wife, who is British from Liverpool, and I'm like, yeah, Beanie,

442
00:20:49,960 --> 00:20:52,480
Speaker 4: obviously it's a very popular nickname for e Lizabeth. She's like,

443
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Speaker 4: I've never.

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Speaker 1: Like Obie.

445
00:20:55,720 --> 00:20:57,480
Speaker 3: I'm here being like, I've never.

446
00:20:57,800 --> 00:20:59,919
Speaker 1: You've never had anyone say Beanie.

447
00:21:00,200 --> 00:21:04,720
Speaker 3: I agree, your wife, Yeah you guess that was accent.

448
00:21:05,359 --> 00:21:07,720
Speaker 4: Oh oh, she's such a good accent. She's a scouse.

449
00:21:07,920 --> 00:21:09,080
Speaker 3: Oh, she's a Scouser.

450
00:21:09,400 --> 00:21:10,919
Speaker 1: Oh and does she sound smarter?

451
00:21:11,200 --> 00:21:11,280
Speaker 4: Like?

452
00:21:11,480 --> 00:21:14,000
Speaker 1: I feel like English accents make everyone seem smarter. So

453
00:21:14,040 --> 00:21:16,000
Speaker 1: even if she's saying something that's not very smart, doesn't

454
00:21:16,040 --> 00:21:16,720
Speaker 1: it sound smart.

455
00:21:17,600 --> 00:21:19,760
Speaker 4: She's honestly one of the most brilliant people I've ever met.

456
00:21:19,800 --> 00:21:21,320
Speaker 4: Some most of what she says, it's smart, but.

457
00:21:21,280 --> 00:21:24,359
Speaker 1: Really smarter because of English sounds.

458
00:21:24,160 --> 00:21:30,600
Speaker 4: Belie, it sounds ability, instant credibility.

459
00:21:31,040 --> 00:21:33,040
Speaker 6: Okay, I have Okay, they've.

460
00:21:32,680 --> 00:21:34,639
Speaker 1: Been around longer, they know things more. I don't know.

461
00:21:48,680 --> 00:21:50,880
Speaker 3: Okay, so you said wife, you got married.

462
00:21:51,320 --> 00:21:53,440
Speaker 1: Wait, I'm still can talk.

463
00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:56,320
Speaker 3: Because I want to know this, Beanie.

464
00:21:56,400 --> 00:21:57,600
Speaker 6: We'll go back to child ahead.

465
00:21:57,640 --> 00:21:58,960
Speaker 3: Okay, but Beanie, we.

466
00:21:58,920 --> 00:22:04,080
Speaker 5: Had a whole episode about bachelorette parties and how out

467
00:22:04,080 --> 00:22:06,600
Speaker 5: of control they are. So she said, I just want

468
00:22:06,600 --> 00:22:10,639
Speaker 5: to know if you had a huge bachelorette party didn't

469
00:22:10,680 --> 00:22:11,720
Speaker 5: last a week?

470
00:22:12,440 --> 00:22:14,080
Speaker 3: Was there like a private jet involved?

471
00:22:14,760 --> 00:22:18,080
Speaker 1: What was this is we hear about and just put it?

472
00:22:18,480 --> 00:22:21,240
Speaker 3: I didn't know because we got married a million years ago.

473
00:22:21,280 --> 00:22:23,240
Speaker 3: It feels like she's a recent.

474
00:22:24,480 --> 00:22:30,000
Speaker 4: So I I'm from La. Most of my extended families

475
00:22:30,040 --> 00:22:32,600
Speaker 4: from the East Coast. My wife's families from Liverpool. A

476
00:22:32,600 --> 00:22:34,679
Speaker 4: lot of them live in London. Now you don't mixture.

477
00:22:35,160 --> 00:22:37,040
Speaker 4: So we decided to get married on the East Coast

478
00:22:37,080 --> 00:22:39,399
Speaker 4: because we felt like that was sort of a central place.

479
00:22:39,960 --> 00:22:43,040
Speaker 4: But we also recognized that people were traveling like a

480
00:22:43,240 --> 00:22:48,040
Speaker 4: huge distance to come celebrate us, and we really did

481
00:22:48,040 --> 00:22:50,720
Speaker 4: not want to put people out for anything more than that.

482
00:22:50,800 --> 00:22:54,480
Speaker 4: So neither of us had bachelorette parties because we felt

483
00:22:54,480 --> 00:22:57,359
Speaker 4: like it would have been really complicated and more of

484
00:22:57,400 --> 00:23:00,000
Speaker 4: an expense that anyone. You know, It just we were

485
00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:02,040
Speaker 4: people were doing enough for us to come celebrate us,

486
00:23:02,040 --> 00:23:04,560
Speaker 4: like they didn't need to know more. But the week

487
00:23:04,600 --> 00:23:08,959
Speaker 4: of the wedding, we started the festivities on Friday. On

488
00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:11,919
Speaker 4: the Wednesday night, my wife went off with her friends

489
00:23:11,960 --> 00:23:14,240
Speaker 4: in the city for a dinner and I went off

490
00:23:14,240 --> 00:23:15,919
Speaker 4: with my friends in the city for a dinner. But

491
00:23:15,960 --> 00:23:19,320
Speaker 4: the theme of my dinner was pretty good, if I

492
00:23:19,359 --> 00:23:23,359
Speaker 4: do say so myself, which is that fond. My wife,

493
00:23:23,400 --> 00:23:27,840
Speaker 4: Bonnie Vaughn, is extremely speaking of allergies, allergic to nuts.

494
00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:29,520
Speaker 4: She's allergic to all nuts.

495
00:23:29,640 --> 00:23:30,479
Speaker 6: You can't go anywhere.

496
00:23:33,160 --> 00:23:36,080
Speaker 4: It's honestly good that we can't procreate together because like

497
00:23:36,119 --> 00:23:39,480
Speaker 4: our child would have to live in a bubble like biologically.

498
00:23:40,520 --> 00:23:44,800
Speaker 4: And so Fawn's allergic to nuts. I'm allergic to dairy,

499
00:23:45,240 --> 00:23:51,480
Speaker 4: gluten and cats and bond. So we decided to make yeah,

500
00:23:51,520 --> 00:23:53,680
Speaker 4: I know it's a lot. Uh so in our house

501
00:23:53,720 --> 00:23:55,880
Speaker 4: we can't have any nuts because she's like really allergic.

502
00:23:56,480 --> 00:24:00,280
Speaker 4: And so my best friends decided to make the theme

503
00:24:00,720 --> 00:24:03,480
Speaker 4: of my dinner Beanie's Last Nuts, which is also a

504
00:24:03,520 --> 00:24:10,879
Speaker 4: great I got you, you got it, And so it

505
00:24:10,920 --> 00:24:14,600
Speaker 4: was Beanie's Last Nuts. And my best friend Mel, who

506
00:24:14,640 --> 00:24:16,800
Speaker 4: also is a huge grays anatomy ban and very excited

507
00:24:16,840 --> 00:24:19,720
Speaker 4: that I'm here, she drew each one of us as

508
00:24:19,760 --> 00:24:22,600
Speaker 4: different nuts. So it was like bean nut and like

509
00:24:22,720 --> 00:24:26,440
Speaker 4: my friend like cat chew. My wife Joe sometimes calls

510
00:24:26,440 --> 00:24:28,320
Speaker 4: me like the Jewish nun. She's like, you were the

511
00:24:28,359 --> 00:24:32,760
Speaker 4: most like rude, little anxious, little like pathetic.

512
00:24:33,320 --> 00:24:34,760
Speaker 1: Well you know what, let me just tell you. Let

513
00:24:34,760 --> 00:24:36,159
Speaker 1: me just tell you, because I'm a bit older than you,

514
00:24:36,280 --> 00:24:39,560
Speaker 1: that there's there's there's hope or if you want it

515
00:24:39,560 --> 00:24:43,000
Speaker 1: to be. I too used to be quite like proper

516
00:24:43,080 --> 00:24:44,919
Speaker 1: and and now look at me, you're not.

517
00:24:45,280 --> 00:24:46,000
Speaker 3: Now you're a mess.

518
00:24:46,119 --> 00:24:48,359
Speaker 1: Can't I'm a mess. I'm talking, I mean not a mess.

519
00:24:48,400 --> 00:24:49,680
Speaker 1: I consider myself evolved.

520
00:24:49,920 --> 00:24:52,760
Speaker 4: My mom didn't drink till she was fifty. Like she

521
00:24:52,880 --> 00:24:54,400
Speaker 4: was kind of similar to me, where she was kind

522
00:24:54,400 --> 00:24:56,800
Speaker 4: of like some my thing is not for me. And

523
00:24:56,800 --> 00:24:57,520
Speaker 4: then how'd that go?

524
00:24:57,600 --> 00:24:57,679
Speaker 2: At?

525
00:24:59,280 --> 00:25:00,879
Speaker 4: Great? I was a little.

526
00:25:03,040 --> 00:25:05,600
Speaker 1: Okay, so again so going so just going back, so

527
00:25:05,600 --> 00:25:08,360
Speaker 1: so so baby being then you grow up in Los

528
00:25:08,359 --> 00:25:10,880
Speaker 1: Angeles and then because I'm just getting to a little

529
00:25:10,880 --> 00:25:13,359
Speaker 1: cross section that you share, I know you are.

530
00:25:14,280 --> 00:25:19,639
Speaker 4: I was waiting. I was like, oh, I went to

531
00:25:19,640 --> 00:25:24,040
Speaker 4: elementary school in West Hollywood and then I went to

532
00:25:24,240 --> 00:25:26,080
Speaker 4: Harvard bust Lake, which is.

533
00:25:26,280 --> 00:25:28,600
Speaker 1: Both of our alma maters.

534
00:25:28,520 --> 00:25:34,160
Speaker 4: A lot about and I I feel that I had

535
00:25:34,240 --> 00:25:38,080
Speaker 4: looking back, like it's so privileged. In general, the whole

536
00:25:38,119 --> 00:25:41,080
Speaker 4: experience there is privilege, but like it's such a privilege

537
00:25:41,280 --> 00:25:45,040
Speaker 4: to find your people at such a young age, and

538
00:25:46,040 --> 00:25:49,200
Speaker 4: sometimes it can feel just like a given if you're

539
00:25:49,240 --> 00:25:51,239
Speaker 4: in the moment of it, of like, yeah, you make

540
00:25:51,280 --> 00:25:53,600
Speaker 4: friends in high school and you stay friends with them forever,

541
00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:56,160
Speaker 4: and that's kind of the expectation. But to actually now

542
00:25:56,680 --> 00:25:59,520
Speaker 4: in our thirties be living that day to day and

543
00:25:59,560 --> 00:26:03,320
Speaker 4: like come in to that and We just had my

544
00:26:03,880 --> 00:26:06,560
Speaker 4: best friend one of my best friend's weddings two weekends ago,

545
00:26:06,680 --> 00:26:10,480
Speaker 4: and just looking around, we were like, it's still us,

546
00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:14,879
Speaker 4: Like we could be fifteen in someone's parents' house sneaking

547
00:26:14,960 --> 00:26:18,119
Speaker 4: alcohol right now, Like it's just us. We've been the

548
00:26:18,200 --> 00:26:22,960
Speaker 4: same for like, you know, almost seventeen eighteen years now, and.

549
00:26:23,000 --> 00:26:25,840
Speaker 1: It's so And how big was the us the group

550
00:26:25,880 --> 00:26:27,960
Speaker 1: of friends at Horror Westlike it's.

551
00:26:27,800 --> 00:26:30,879
Speaker 4: Like about maybe of the people that went to Harvard

552
00:26:30,880 --> 00:26:33,120
Speaker 4: Westlake maybe like nine or ten.

553
00:26:33,240 --> 00:26:34,680
Speaker 3: Are you now performers? Did you?

554
00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:36,639
Speaker 1: I mean, was that your bond at first?

555
00:26:37,800 --> 00:26:42,120
Speaker 4: Most of us are performers, definitely, all of us are

556
00:26:42,240 --> 00:26:45,280
Speaker 4: very like creative, so some like two of my best

557
00:26:45,280 --> 00:26:48,400
Speaker 4: friends are performers, but they once a graphic designer ones

558
00:26:48,440 --> 00:26:53,880
Speaker 4: and music supervisor, like extremely creative and just very talented

559
00:26:53,920 --> 00:26:56,639
Speaker 4: in their own way, just not not on stage people

560
00:26:56,680 --> 00:26:56,960
Speaker 4: at all.

561
00:26:57,040 --> 00:26:59,320
Speaker 1: But you know, and were you performing at Harvard westlike,

562
00:26:59,480 --> 00:27:01,800
Speaker 1: like were you doing all the plays and the musicals

563
00:27:01,840 --> 00:27:03,520
Speaker 1: and all that? My god?

564
00:27:03,600 --> 00:27:05,960
Speaker 4: Yeah, And mister Walt, like I feel like we have to.

565
00:27:06,040 --> 00:27:09,159
Speaker 1: Did you have the same teacher asking? So I'm quite

566
00:27:09,359 --> 00:27:13,840
Speaker 1: jealous because I happened upon So we're talking about mister Walsh,

567
00:27:13,840 --> 00:27:17,560
Speaker 1: Ted Walch, who is like a Ted go way back.

568
00:27:18,880 --> 00:27:20,400
Speaker 1: She feels left out. This is what she does when

569
00:27:20,400 --> 00:27:21,160
Speaker 1: she feels left out.

570
00:27:21,920 --> 00:27:26,199
Speaker 4: The old t bones, the old He's looking down on you,

571
00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:27,000
Speaker 4: and he'd be like.

572
00:27:29,720 --> 00:27:37,760
Speaker 1: He's passed way to God memory. She would love that

573
00:27:37,800 --> 00:27:38,560
Speaker 1: we're talking about her.

574
00:27:40,600 --> 00:27:42,120
Speaker 6: This is the best ever.

575
00:27:43,520 --> 00:27:45,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh my gosh. She would always give it to me.

576
00:27:45,160 --> 00:27:48,480
Speaker 1: Really honest too, I would anyways. I'm but that that's

577
00:27:48,480 --> 00:27:50,800
Speaker 1: part of it, which was I was actually not in

578
00:27:50,880 --> 00:27:54,359
Speaker 1: the performing arts, kid gang. I was more do not

579
00:27:54,400 --> 00:27:57,320
Speaker 1: get in? Probably not? Yeah, no, I think I sort

580
00:27:57,359 --> 00:27:59,159
Speaker 1: of came to it late. It's not about me, but

581
00:27:59,200 --> 00:27:59,480
Speaker 1: I was.

582
00:27:59,840 --> 00:28:01,560
Speaker 4: I didn't do any shows.

583
00:28:01,920 --> 00:28:04,440
Speaker 6: Well it's okay, So the auditioned, but they didn't audition.

584
00:28:05,680 --> 00:28:09,240
Speaker 1: He actually didn't. I actually did. I did my senior

585
00:28:09,320 --> 00:28:11,560
Speaker 1: year I auditioned for. It was like such a I

586
00:28:11,600 --> 00:28:14,800
Speaker 1: mean again, I mean okay, so let me just let

587
00:28:14,800 --> 00:28:18,720
Speaker 1: me let's back track furce again. I clearly had a

588
00:28:18,760 --> 00:28:21,680
Speaker 1: family that was in the in the performing arts, and

589
00:28:22,160 --> 00:28:25,159
Speaker 1: there was sort of this I think that I fought it.

590
00:28:25,240 --> 00:28:28,040
Speaker 1: I was like, that's too predictable. Of course, I'll want

591
00:28:28,040 --> 00:28:30,840
Speaker 1: to be an actress. Blah, blah blah blah. Who needs that?

592
00:28:31,240 --> 00:28:33,919
Speaker 1: And then also the perfectionist and the do gooder and

593
00:28:33,920 --> 00:28:35,000
Speaker 1: the people pleaser, and me was like.

594
00:28:35,000 --> 00:28:35,680
Speaker 5: What if I suck?

595
00:28:35,840 --> 00:28:38,120
Speaker 1: Like that would be terrible? Right then I was really

596
00:28:38,240 --> 00:28:40,840
Speaker 1: bad at it, so let's just not even find out.

597
00:28:40,960 --> 00:28:43,520
Speaker 1: And then right around fourteen fifteen, after I had like

598
00:28:43,680 --> 00:28:46,040
Speaker 1: just been in my bathroom talking to myself in the

599
00:28:46,080 --> 00:28:48,200
Speaker 1: mirror and doing monologues and all this stuff, I was like, Okay,

600
00:28:48,240 --> 00:28:50,440
Speaker 1: you clearly want to do this, so you should probably

601
00:28:50,480 --> 00:28:52,920
Speaker 1: just try. So I went, I had to go away

602
00:28:52,920 --> 00:28:55,400
Speaker 1: from my community. I went to a summer camp and

603
00:28:55,440 --> 00:28:57,400
Speaker 1: I did it. And at the end of the summer camp,

604
00:28:57,440 --> 00:29:00,240
Speaker 1: you get like your evaluations and fucking Jessica cap I

605
00:29:00,320 --> 00:29:02,360
Speaker 1: just goes in there and everyone else is just wanting

606
00:29:02,400 --> 00:29:04,000
Speaker 1: to get you know, how did I do it my

607
00:29:04,040 --> 00:29:06,320
Speaker 1: monologue and how was my last song or whatever? And

608
00:29:06,400 --> 00:29:08,760
Speaker 1: I looked at these people squarely in the eye and

609
00:29:08,800 --> 00:29:10,560
Speaker 1: they were all lined up on the stage, three of them,

610
00:29:10,600 --> 00:29:13,520
Speaker 1: and I was like, I don't even need my notes.

611
00:29:14,120 --> 00:29:17,160
Speaker 1: Can I make it? Will I be able to do

612
00:29:17,200 --> 00:29:19,920
Speaker 1: this as a professional who.

613
00:29:19,960 --> 00:29:23,720
Speaker 5: Just went I'm fifteen straight to it because these people

614
00:29:23,760 --> 00:29:29,440
Speaker 5: would know, can I make it in Hollywood.

615
00:29:29,520 --> 00:29:35,240
Speaker 1: Will my dreams be a reality? They're like whatever, kid, Anyways,

616
00:29:35,240 --> 00:29:37,160
Speaker 1: they must have. They gave me enough to go on.

617
00:29:37,200 --> 00:29:39,640
Speaker 1: So when I came back to Harvard West like must

618
00:29:39,640 --> 00:29:41,560
Speaker 1: have been my sophomore year, I signed up for an

619
00:29:41,600 --> 00:29:43,480
Speaker 1: acting class and I was like, Okay, I'm gonna do this.

620
00:29:43,560 --> 00:29:45,680
Speaker 1: And that's what I met Ted Walch and Ted Walsh

621
00:29:46,000 --> 00:29:48,600
Speaker 1: was for me, one of the most inspiring teachers I've

622
00:29:48,640 --> 00:29:52,320
Speaker 1: ever ever ever had, and he did so much to

623
00:29:52,760 --> 00:29:56,360
Speaker 1: help me and grow my confidence and taught me and

624
00:29:57,200 --> 00:29:59,960
Speaker 1: I just got an incredible education from him, and we

625
00:30:00,080 --> 00:30:05,040
Speaker 1: remained friends. And when COVID happened, when everything locked down,

626
00:30:05,240 --> 00:30:07,320
Speaker 1: he lived in an apartment right around the corner from

627
00:30:07,320 --> 00:30:10,240
Speaker 1: Harvard Westlake and nobody was touching anybody or going out

628
00:30:10,320 --> 00:30:13,080
Speaker 1: or anything. And I reached out to him and I said,

629
00:30:13,560 --> 00:30:16,600
Speaker 1: how are you doing? And he said I'm doing good.

630
00:30:16,640 --> 00:30:18,000
Speaker 1: And I said, well, do you want to go for

631
00:30:18,040 --> 00:30:20,920
Speaker 1: a walk? That seems safe right? And that walk turned

632
00:30:20,960 --> 00:30:23,720
Speaker 1: into a weekly walk that I had with him. I

633
00:30:23,760 --> 00:30:27,280
Speaker 1: would walk around his neighborhood and he would come to

634
00:30:27,280 --> 00:30:30,040
Speaker 1: mind sometimes when he would get bored. But those walks

635
00:30:30,040 --> 00:30:32,920
Speaker 1: were incredible, and of course he talked about, you know,

636
00:30:32,960 --> 00:30:35,280
Speaker 1: all of his students, some of whom you would have

637
00:30:35,360 --> 00:30:37,880
Speaker 1: heard of and some you would not. But he spoke

638
00:30:37,920 --> 00:30:42,640
Speaker 1: about you and how special you are. And then he

639
00:30:42,680 --> 00:30:45,239
Speaker 1: also was like, you know, he's also very matter of fact, right,

640
00:30:45,360 --> 00:30:47,920
Speaker 1: Like that's what you actually really love and respect about

641
00:30:47,920 --> 00:30:49,520
Speaker 1: a teacher is that they're not just giving you all

642
00:30:49,520 --> 00:30:51,640
Speaker 1: the good, they're giving you the bad. So I'd done this.

643
00:30:52,760 --> 00:30:55,440
Speaker 1: I'd done this Netflix movie with Emma Roberts called Holiday,

644
00:30:56,120 --> 00:30:58,160
Speaker 1: and he hadn't watched it, but he'd heard that I

645
00:30:58,200 --> 00:30:59,840
Speaker 1: was in it, and so he watched it. And then

646
00:31:00,000 --> 00:31:01,560
Speaker 1: I went for a walk and he said, so I

647
00:31:01,600 --> 00:31:05,360
Speaker 1: watched that movie and give you notes. He didn't really

648
00:31:05,400 --> 00:31:07,360
Speaker 1: give me notes. He just gave me an assessment, which

649
00:31:07,400 --> 00:31:08,520
Speaker 1: was you were okay.

650
00:31:09,600 --> 00:31:10,240
Speaker 6: Oh my god.

651
00:31:10,280 --> 00:31:12,719
Speaker 1: I really he was like, you were okay.

652
00:31:13,240 --> 00:31:14,440
Speaker 6: I mean it was like great.

653
00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:19,680
Speaker 4: I was brushing my teeth. I was thinking about exactly this,

654
00:31:19,760 --> 00:31:22,360
Speaker 4: and I'm so glad you brought it up because obviously

655
00:31:22,680 --> 00:31:26,960
Speaker 4: any So basically he was truly like my life mentor,

656
00:31:27,440 --> 00:31:33,480
Speaker 4: so I did. Harbor Westlake was doing Sound of Music

657
00:31:33,720 --> 00:31:36,960
Speaker 4: when I was in fourth grade and they needed a gretel.

658
00:31:37,120 --> 00:31:41,280
Speaker 4: They needed the youngest spawn trap child and somehow through

659
00:31:41,960 --> 00:31:44,960
Speaker 4: basically the headmaster of Harbor Westlake. His wife worked at

660
00:31:44,960 --> 00:31:47,320
Speaker 4: my elementary school, so she was like, I have a

661
00:31:47,400 --> 00:31:50,680
Speaker 4: kid that could could hang with the big kids. And

662
00:31:51,040 --> 00:31:53,240
Speaker 4: I walked into Harbor west Lake at nine years old

663
00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:55,160
Speaker 4: and I auditioned to play Gretel and the Sound of Music.

664
00:31:56,080 --> 00:31:58,760
Speaker 4: And that's when Walt I met. So I've known him

665
00:31:58,760 --> 00:32:01,320
Speaker 4: like pretty much my entire life, and I would say

666
00:32:01,400 --> 00:32:05,800
Speaker 4: he is my greatest mentor, my greatest teacher, my greatest friend,

667
00:32:05,920 --> 00:32:09,240
Speaker 4: second grandfather, all of the things. And when I was

668
00:32:09,280 --> 00:32:12,400
Speaker 4: brushing my teeth today, I was thinking about this podcast,

669
00:32:12,440 --> 00:32:17,320
Speaker 4: and I was thinking about you and how he when

670
00:32:17,400 --> 00:32:19,600
Speaker 4: him and I spoke during the pandemic, he said, and

671
00:32:19,720 --> 00:32:23,160
Speaker 4: I think it was Wednesdays. Every Wednesday, Jessica and I

672
00:32:23,200 --> 00:32:25,680
Speaker 4: go on a walk. It's my favorite part of the week.

673
00:32:25,760 --> 00:32:28,960
Speaker 4: And I think, I think you really gave him so

674
00:32:29,120 --> 00:32:32,360
Speaker 4: much during what we ended up being his last years,

675
00:32:32,480 --> 00:32:36,480
Speaker 4: and I feel jealous and grateful that you were. I

676
00:32:36,480 --> 00:32:41,760
Speaker 4: could cry like they are with it, obviously, but he

677
00:32:42,800 --> 00:32:45,680
Speaker 4: I think he cherished those those walks. And the most

678
00:32:45,680 --> 00:32:47,880
Speaker 4: nervous I've ever been in my entire life is when

679
00:32:47,880 --> 00:32:50,520
Speaker 4: Walt is in the audience. There is no one that

680
00:32:51,040 --> 00:32:53,800
Speaker 4: and I feel sad that I'll never have that, I'll

681
00:32:53,840 --> 00:32:58,160
Speaker 4: never have that honesty again. But when he came to

682
00:32:58,200 --> 00:32:59,280
Speaker 4: New York Town, you.

683
00:32:59,280 --> 00:33:01,680
Speaker 1: In the show, I mean, he's just it was it

684
00:33:01,720 --> 00:33:04,120
Speaker 1: was Wednesdays with walch and it meant a lot to

685
00:33:04,240 --> 00:33:07,240
Speaker 1: both of us. And you know, it's that your story

686
00:33:07,240 --> 00:33:11,800
Speaker 1: reminds me of is when I was in high school. Uh,

687
00:33:12,000 --> 00:33:15,120
Speaker 1: we did the King and I that was the part

688
00:33:15,120 --> 00:33:16,400
Speaker 1: that I auditioned for it that he didn't give me,

689
00:33:16,440 --> 00:33:18,480
Speaker 1: and I was very mad at him about that. Anyways,

690
00:33:19,840 --> 00:33:23,360
Speaker 1: we digress. I really really thought that I could be

691
00:33:23,440 --> 00:33:26,920
Speaker 1: that part. So Jake Chill and Hall came over from

692
00:33:26,920 --> 00:33:30,520
Speaker 1: the lower school to play one of the kids. No

693
00:33:30,720 --> 00:33:32,160
Speaker 1: way he was because he was younger.

694
00:33:32,240 --> 00:33:34,240
Speaker 3: Why did I think Harvard Westlake was just high school?

695
00:33:34,680 --> 00:33:38,000
Speaker 1: It's middle seven, seventh through twelfth. Oh okay, there's a

696
00:33:38,040 --> 00:33:40,920
Speaker 1: middle school campus and there's an upper school campus. Oh yeah.

697
00:33:41,120 --> 00:33:41,200
Speaker 7: No.

698
00:33:41,840 --> 00:33:47,040
Speaker 1: Having someone believe in you like that is so incredible.

699
00:33:47,080 --> 00:33:48,760
Speaker 1: And that's why I do think that, you know, for

700
00:33:48,840 --> 00:33:50,680
Speaker 1: all of them, for all the people out there listening,

701
00:33:51,360 --> 00:33:55,680
Speaker 1: that that relationship wherever you can find it. And you know,

702
00:33:55,680 --> 00:33:58,560
Speaker 1: obviously there's there's he was a super special guy. But

703
00:33:59,160 --> 00:34:01,920
Speaker 1: looking for you know, people in your community that can

704
00:34:01,960 --> 00:34:04,040
Speaker 1: help you grow, or that take an interest in you

705
00:34:04,080 --> 00:34:07,720
Speaker 1: and support you and and can really show up for you.

706
00:34:07,760 --> 00:34:10,640
Speaker 1: It's really, it was really, it was an unbelievable gift.

707
00:34:11,000 --> 00:34:13,720
Speaker 4: I think also for all the teachers listening, like, thank

708
00:34:13,760 --> 00:34:16,040
Speaker 4: you and keep going, because if you can have that

709
00:34:16,080 --> 00:34:21,120
Speaker 4: effect on one child, or one person or one family,

710
00:34:22,760 --> 00:34:25,680
Speaker 4: it's it's just very profound. And I since he's passed,

711
00:34:25,719 --> 00:34:31,319
Speaker 4: I started volunteering with kids, and actually I'm now on

712
00:34:31,320 --> 00:34:33,960
Speaker 4: the board of but I volunteer for this organization called

713
00:34:34,000 --> 00:34:38,520
Speaker 4: Experience Camps, which is a nonprofit organization that puts on

714
00:34:38,600 --> 00:34:39,960
Speaker 4: camps for kids that are grieving.

715
00:34:40,120 --> 00:34:43,120
Speaker 5: I know I've seen and I was talking about it

716
00:34:43,160 --> 00:34:45,440
Speaker 5: before because I lost my mom when I was young, Beanie,

717
00:34:45,480 --> 00:34:48,799
Speaker 5: and these camps would have been like I had younger siblings.

718
00:34:48,880 --> 00:34:52,800
Speaker 5: I was nineteen, but I had younger siblings. And honestly,

719
00:34:52,920 --> 00:34:56,680
Speaker 5: I literally saw you post one summer maybe two summers ago.

720
00:34:56,719 --> 00:34:58,160
Speaker 3: Did you start two years ago?

721
00:34:58,320 --> 00:34:58,520
Speaker 4: Yeah?

722
00:34:58,520 --> 00:35:01,120
Speaker 5: That was my first Okay, yeah, and I thought, oh

723
00:35:01,120 --> 00:35:03,080
Speaker 5: my gosh, I should go volunteer, but I think I

724
00:35:03,080 --> 00:35:03,880
Speaker 5: would be terrible.

725
00:35:04,360 --> 00:35:06,000
Speaker 3: I think I would just cry the whole time.

726
00:35:06,760 --> 00:35:09,000
Speaker 4: But that's also okay. We can talk about it, okay,

727
00:35:09,160 --> 00:35:11,760
Speaker 4: But I come with me, Come with me to Maine.

728
00:35:12,160 --> 00:35:16,000
Speaker 4: It's truly truly changed my entire life just that community.

729
00:35:16,080 --> 00:35:19,400
Speaker 4: But I think about Walch so much when I'm there,

730
00:35:19,480 --> 00:35:24,400
Speaker 4: because if I could have like eightieth of the effect

731
00:35:24,600 --> 00:35:27,400
Speaker 4: on one of those kids that he had on me,

732
00:35:29,719 --> 00:35:31,919
Speaker 4: it would just be like my greatest life's work.

733
00:35:32,000 --> 00:35:47,799
Speaker 5: I think, Well, I do want to talk about the

734
00:35:47,840 --> 00:35:50,160
Speaker 5: camp just in case there are people listening that have

735
00:35:50,920 --> 00:35:54,000
Speaker 5: kids that are going to have lost somebody and are

736
00:35:54,040 --> 00:35:56,160
Speaker 5: going experiencing grief.

737
00:35:57,239 --> 00:35:58,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, and what grief is?

738
00:35:59,200 --> 00:36:01,160
Speaker 5: Can you talk about a little bit so that because

739
00:36:01,200 --> 00:36:03,400
Speaker 5: maybe someone's listening and they don't know about it and

740
00:36:03,440 --> 00:36:05,280
Speaker 5: they want to send someone.

741
00:36:05,760 --> 00:36:11,560
Speaker 4: So for context, my brother suddenly passed away almost seven

742
00:36:11,600 --> 00:36:14,640
Speaker 4: years ago, and he has two children who are like

743
00:36:14,680 --> 00:36:16,640
Speaker 4: the lights of all of our lives, one of thems

744
00:36:16,680 --> 00:36:21,320
Speaker 4: at Harve Westlake, and they're just the best thing to

745
00:36:21,360 --> 00:36:25,319
Speaker 4: ever happen to our family. But you know, I just

746
00:36:25,680 --> 00:36:27,680
Speaker 4: had to rattle in my family in a way that

747
00:36:27,760 --> 00:36:30,200
Speaker 4: kind of there are no words for. So I was

748
00:36:30,239 --> 00:36:34,719
Speaker 4: on TikTok one day and just scrolling away, and I

749
00:36:34,880 --> 00:36:37,520
Speaker 4: was given this video of a little boy I think

750
00:36:37,520 --> 00:36:40,840
Speaker 4: he was maybe nine or ten, and he was talking

751
00:36:40,920 --> 00:36:44,799
Speaker 4: about his father passing away and how camp has helped

752
00:36:44,880 --> 00:36:48,799
Speaker 4: him find community. All of these like light bulbs are

753
00:36:48,800 --> 00:36:50,879
Speaker 4: going off in my head because a w summer camp

754
00:36:50,920 --> 00:36:53,120
Speaker 4: for ten years couldn't be more of a camp. Girl

755
00:36:53,160 --> 00:36:56,400
Speaker 4: my parents met at summer camp, like camp is in

756
00:36:56,480 --> 00:36:59,480
Speaker 4: our DNA. So the camp component of it, I was like,

757
00:36:59,480 --> 00:37:01,719
Speaker 4: what is he talking about? But obviously the more substantial

758
00:37:01,760 --> 00:37:04,560
Speaker 4: component of it was the loss and a child speaking

759
00:37:04,600 --> 00:37:09,120
Speaker 4: so openly and bravely about loss. So I google the camp.

760
00:37:09,200 --> 00:37:12,279
Speaker 4: I go down this like intense rabbit hole about the

761
00:37:12,320 --> 00:37:16,120
Speaker 4: camp and I cold dam the Instagram account because I

762
00:37:16,160 --> 00:37:19,720
Speaker 4: can't find an email, and I just was like, anything

763
00:37:19,719 --> 00:37:21,960
Speaker 4: I can do to help, I'll donate, I'll make a video,

764
00:37:22,080 --> 00:37:24,160
Speaker 4: I'll you know, anything I can do to help. The

765
00:37:24,200 --> 00:37:27,200
Speaker 4: girl that runs head of marketing Experience Camps, her name is,

766
00:37:27,239 --> 00:37:30,040
Speaker 4: her name is Jesse. She's incredible. We get on a

767
00:37:30,120 --> 00:37:34,240
Speaker 4: zoom and she's like, can I ask you? Or actually

768
00:37:34,280 --> 00:37:36,200
Speaker 4: I think I asked her first, how did you come

769
00:37:36,239 --> 00:37:38,920
Speaker 4: to Experience camps? And she said, you know, I was

770
00:37:38,960 --> 00:37:42,880
Speaker 4: a volunteer after my brother Jordan died and why are

771
00:37:42,920 --> 00:37:45,440
Speaker 4: you why are you interested in experienced camps Beanie, And

772
00:37:45,480 --> 00:37:48,759
Speaker 4: I was like, because my brother Jordan died. And we

773
00:37:48,800 --> 00:37:52,640
Speaker 4: sort of just stared at each other across the zoom.

774
00:37:52,800 --> 00:37:54,759
Speaker 4: I even have chills when I tell the story. But

775
00:37:56,120 --> 00:37:59,160
Speaker 4: we just truly we had never met before. Now we're

776
00:37:59,239 --> 00:38:02,200
Speaker 4: very close friends, and we just stare at each other

777
00:38:02,239 --> 00:38:05,439
Speaker 4: on this zoo. We've been talking for five minutes and

778
00:38:05,480 --> 00:38:07,680
Speaker 4: she was like, I think you need to come to camp.

779
00:38:07,800 --> 00:38:11,240
Speaker 4: She was like, I'll take any donation big or small

780
00:38:11,360 --> 00:38:13,920
Speaker 4: from anybody, but like, it's clear to me that you

781
00:38:14,040 --> 00:38:16,680
Speaker 4: have like a poll to be in our community deeper.

782
00:38:17,320 --> 00:38:19,400
Speaker 4: And I would say the same thing to you. It

783
00:38:19,440 --> 00:38:21,279
Speaker 4: sounds like you might have a poll to be in

784
00:38:21,320 --> 00:38:24,800
Speaker 4: our community deeper. And I think it's just an incredibly

785
00:38:24,800 --> 00:38:28,240
Speaker 4: special place. So it's completely no cost, so any family

786
00:38:29,320 --> 00:38:33,200
Speaker 4: can access the camp. We have Currently, we have thirteen

787
00:38:33,280 --> 00:38:43,520
Speaker 4: programs around the country, So there's one in Hawaii, California, Michigan, Georgia, Maryland, Pennsylvania, Maine,

788
00:38:43,520 --> 00:38:45,000
Speaker 4: and then most of them have a boys camp and

789
00:38:45,040 --> 00:38:48,520
Speaker 4: a girls camp. So together it's about thirteen and we're

790
00:38:49,360 --> 00:38:54,399
Speaker 4: we're servicing. I think about fourteen hundred kids. Wow, what's

791
00:38:54,440 --> 00:38:58,640
Speaker 4: the age going into ninth grade through senior year of

792
00:38:58,680 --> 00:39:02,440
Speaker 4: high school? So okay, you never have to say goodbye

793
00:39:02,480 --> 00:39:04,640
Speaker 4: to the camp. So if you come to the camp,

794
00:39:04,960 --> 00:39:07,200
Speaker 4: you're always welcome back every summer because we don't want

795
00:39:07,200 --> 00:39:10,239
Speaker 4: to kind of add more loss into their lives. So

796
00:39:10,880 --> 00:39:13,080
Speaker 4: once you graduate high school, you're welcome to come back

797
00:39:13,160 --> 00:39:14,880
Speaker 4: as a junior counselor and that county.

798
00:39:16,480 --> 00:39:20,320
Speaker 5: And do you see, like, is it truly this healing experience?

799
00:39:20,360 --> 00:39:22,080
Speaker 5: You think for a lot of kids it's grief is

800
00:39:22,120 --> 00:39:25,799
Speaker 5: so hard, less as so difficult, So what do you see?

801
00:39:26,480 --> 00:39:30,960
Speaker 4: It's like the most profound experience I think any of

802
00:39:31,080 --> 00:39:33,440
Speaker 4: us that have been their young or old kids or

803
00:39:33,560 --> 00:39:37,120
Speaker 4: volunteers have ever had. And I think the magic of

804
00:39:37,200 --> 00:39:41,280
Speaker 4: experience camps is like the joy, which I know sounds

805
00:39:41,320 --> 00:39:45,279
Speaker 4: so it's not full or counterintuitive. But when you know

806
00:39:45,360 --> 00:39:48,359
Speaker 4: that you're surrounded by people that understand, like in their

807
00:39:48,400 --> 00:39:54,800
Speaker 4: bones understand, you can let loose and you can be vulnerable,

808
00:39:54,880 --> 00:39:58,040
Speaker 4: but you also can jump in the lake and be

809
00:39:58,239 --> 00:40:01,080
Speaker 4: silly and sing Taylors at the top of your lungs,

810
00:40:01,200 --> 00:40:05,319
Speaker 4: and make friendship bracelets and talk about your people or

811
00:40:05,360 --> 00:40:07,960
Speaker 4: not talk about your people and know that you're in

812
00:40:08,000 --> 00:40:10,479
Speaker 4: a space of people that will support you no matter

813
00:40:10,520 --> 00:40:11,400
Speaker 4: what and we'll catch you.

814
00:40:11,960 --> 00:40:13,440
Speaker 6: And I think because of alone.

815
00:40:13,800 --> 00:40:17,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, because it's also very complicated in loss and

816
00:40:17,480 --> 00:40:20,120
Speaker 1: grief because you think, or I think a lot of

817
00:40:20,120 --> 00:40:23,799
Speaker 1: people would think that the loss and grief is all

818
00:40:23,800 --> 00:40:28,279
Speaker 1: one thing and it's sad. It's just absolutely sad. And

819
00:40:28,760 --> 00:40:31,879
Speaker 1: of course we're humans, so actually you know that would

820
00:40:32,000 --> 00:40:33,960
Speaker 1: we would just shrivel up and die if we were

821
00:40:34,880 --> 00:40:38,640
Speaker 1: always sad. And I think that it's the paradox of

822
00:40:38,760 --> 00:40:40,840
Speaker 1: knowing that you can go to a camp where everyone

823
00:40:40,960 --> 00:40:44,839
Speaker 1: is feeling loss and grief and they're understanding the highs

824
00:40:44,840 --> 00:40:46,759
Speaker 1: and lows of it, that they're understanding that they can

825
00:40:46,960 --> 00:40:49,279
Speaker 1: sing and dance and they can also cry and they

826
00:40:49,280 --> 00:40:51,280
Speaker 1: can and that's and not feel alone.

827
00:40:52,760 --> 00:40:55,239
Speaker 4: Really the magic of the camp is like an hour

828
00:40:55,280 --> 00:40:58,120
Speaker 4: a day, we at least one hour day, sometimes two,

829
00:40:58,200 --> 00:41:02,640
Speaker 4: we talk about grief very specific with licensed clinicians and counselors.

830
00:41:03,239 --> 00:41:05,160
Speaker 4: And then when the bell goes off and the hour

831
00:41:05,280 --> 00:41:08,239
Speaker 4: is over, we get up and we go to soccer.

832
00:41:08,120 --> 00:41:11,240
Speaker 1: Where we go and you found them through social media.

833
00:41:12,080 --> 00:41:12,600
Speaker 4: I found them.

834
00:41:12,600 --> 00:41:16,920
Speaker 1: There's hotel, this is the power of social media. For

835
00:41:17,360 --> 00:41:18,320
Speaker 1: this is what I believe.

836
00:41:18,400 --> 00:41:21,120
Speaker 4: I have to stay on it exactly exactly. I wouldn't

837
00:41:21,160 --> 00:41:24,360
Speaker 4: have known about this thing, and I feel very privileged

838
00:41:24,400 --> 00:41:27,280
Speaker 4: because of acting. I get to spread the word about

839
00:41:27,320 --> 00:41:32,040
Speaker 4: it and hopefully bring more. You know, I love so much.

840
00:41:32,080 --> 00:41:32,799
Speaker 3: I love that we're talking.

841
00:41:33,400 --> 00:41:35,839
Speaker 1: Do you find yourself on TikTok or what's your social

842
00:41:36,000 --> 00:41:37,600
Speaker 1: what's the social? So I was just saying that I

843
00:41:37,680 --> 00:41:40,200
Speaker 1: haven't I go immediately to Instagram, like my fingers. I

844
00:41:40,239 --> 00:41:42,520
Speaker 1: don't even know all the things that Tristan Harris says

845
00:41:42,520 --> 00:41:44,400
Speaker 1: are true. There's some dopamine hit. I don't know what

846
00:41:44,480 --> 00:41:46,440
Speaker 1: happens all of a sudden, my fingers are just on Instagram.

847
00:41:46,560 --> 00:41:48,879
Speaker 1: I didn't even try to do it, and I'm there,

848
00:41:49,680 --> 00:41:50,160
Speaker 1: Where do you go?

849
00:41:50,840 --> 00:41:53,279
Speaker 4: I'm a little bit of everything I do have. Like

850
00:41:55,480 --> 00:41:57,120
Speaker 4: no one makes fun of me harder than my wife

851
00:41:57,160 --> 00:42:00,160
Speaker 4: about this, but like I have a deep YouTube kind

852
00:42:00,200 --> 00:42:02,480
Speaker 4: of thing where I just go on YouTube.

853
00:42:02,480 --> 00:42:03,080
Speaker 1: Do you want to do it?

854
00:42:03,239 --> 00:42:03,399
Speaker 5: Wait?

855
00:42:03,480 --> 00:42:06,440
Speaker 1: Say more? Where are you going? Are you going deeply

856
00:42:06,640 --> 00:42:07,200
Speaker 1: in YouTube?

857
00:42:07,280 --> 00:42:11,560
Speaker 4: I just know I follow people that she's like to.

858
00:42:11,680 --> 00:42:15,000
Speaker 4: These people have any other like viewers other than you,

859
00:42:17,120 --> 00:42:19,920
Speaker 4: and I just will find the most random people and

860
00:42:20,040 --> 00:42:21,879
Speaker 4: get parasocially attached to them.

861
00:42:22,080 --> 00:42:24,400
Speaker 3: I just need to keeping their channel. A love to

862
00:42:24,440 --> 00:42:24,799
Speaker 3: be real.

863
00:42:25,239 --> 00:42:27,720
Speaker 4: Yeah, I need to like watch them, you know, unbox

864
00:42:27,800 --> 00:42:30,000
Speaker 4: a candle that I'm allergic to and can't ever buy.

865
00:42:30,280 --> 00:42:31,080
Speaker 4: Just like that.

866
00:42:31,440 --> 00:42:31,920
Speaker 3: I love.

867
00:42:34,080 --> 00:42:37,520
Speaker 4: And therapy. It calms my brain down.

868
00:42:37,880 --> 00:42:40,960
Speaker 1: So when you okay, so also when you if you

869
00:42:41,040 --> 00:42:43,520
Speaker 1: go on Instagram, do you ever get that thing? I've

870
00:42:43,600 --> 00:42:45,759
Speaker 1: explained it a couple of times where like a I'll

871
00:42:45,840 --> 00:42:47,960
Speaker 1: somehow be on someone's page that I don't even know,

872
00:42:49,560 --> 00:42:51,120
Speaker 1: but i go down the rabbit hole and I'm looking

873
00:42:51,160 --> 00:42:54,239
Speaker 1: at their whole life and I do the comparison thing

874
00:42:54,440 --> 00:42:57,239
Speaker 1: that's lethal, Like you should never do it, but but

875
00:42:57,360 --> 00:42:59,279
Speaker 1: I do it. At least I can recognize that I've

876
00:42:59,320 --> 00:43:01,240
Speaker 1: done it and like pull myself back from the ledge.

877
00:43:01,560 --> 00:43:05,400
Speaker 1: Is there any is there any account or scrolling through

878
00:43:05,480 --> 00:43:08,800
Speaker 1: Instagram where you're like this is I gotta stop doing that.

879
00:43:08,840 --> 00:43:10,120
Speaker 1: I got looking at that person.

880
00:43:10,400 --> 00:43:13,160
Speaker 4: I have to be honest, Like my mom and I

881
00:43:13,239 --> 00:43:15,719
Speaker 4: talk about this a lot because not to out her

882
00:43:15,760 --> 00:43:18,279
Speaker 4: on art your podcast, but she really can go down

883
00:43:18,320 --> 00:43:21,520
Speaker 4: that hole fast, Like this person is so happy and

884
00:43:21,560 --> 00:43:24,160
Speaker 4: they're on this vacation or they have this thing or

885
00:43:24,640 --> 00:43:28,759
Speaker 4: you know, look at their holiday celebrations or whatever it is,

886
00:43:28,800 --> 00:43:32,480
Speaker 4: and I'm like, mom, this is one eightieth of their day.

887
00:43:32,719 --> 00:43:33,480
Speaker 4: This is one.

888
00:43:33,880 --> 00:43:34,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, you're not.

889
00:43:34,640 --> 00:43:39,440
Speaker 4: They're not videoing the the you know, car backfiring or

890
00:43:39,560 --> 00:43:43,960
Speaker 4: the family fight. Yeah yeah, or like spilling coffee all

891
00:43:44,000 --> 00:43:46,200
Speaker 4: over themselves whatever it is. Like, they're not filming the

892
00:43:46,280 --> 00:43:49,080
Speaker 4: humanness of their day. They're just trying to make themselves

893
00:43:49,120 --> 00:43:52,960
Speaker 4: feel better and put out something that's created and beautiful

894
00:43:53,040 --> 00:43:56,040
Speaker 4: and digestible and all those things. So I walk her

895
00:43:56,080 --> 00:43:57,440
Speaker 4: off that ledge quite a bit.

896
00:43:58,160 --> 00:43:59,080
Speaker 6: Tell her follow me.

897
00:43:59,239 --> 00:44:01,759
Speaker 3: She's never gonna sit there and stroll and be like, God,

898
00:44:04,480 --> 00:44:05,040
Speaker 3: my mom.

899
00:44:07,200 --> 00:44:09,239
Speaker 4: No one loves Graze more than me and my mom.

900
00:44:09,360 --> 00:44:11,839
Speaker 4: It's our thing that we did. I remember I met

901
00:44:11,880 --> 00:44:12,479
Speaker 4: her a lot.

902
00:44:13,160 --> 00:44:16,719
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, and why was she there? She was friends

903
00:44:16,760 --> 00:44:20,160
Speaker 1: with someone literally her on the lot. She was, yes,

904
00:44:20,360 --> 00:44:22,800
Speaker 1: she said, because she she she introduced herself to me.

905
00:44:23,120 --> 00:44:25,920
Speaker 5: Oh because you know why, Beanie, because you ran you

906
00:44:26,080 --> 00:44:29,040
Speaker 5: snuck onto the lot June Beanie's episode.

907
00:44:29,719 --> 00:44:31,880
Speaker 1: But my mom, no, no, no, no, no no no,

908
00:44:32,120 --> 00:44:36,040
Speaker 1: this was way before because she now we're like offline.

909
00:44:36,480 --> 00:44:37,799
Speaker 1: But she came up to me because I think she'd

910
00:44:37,840 --> 00:44:42,800
Speaker 1: met my sister Sasha. Yeah, maybe through Max and Jonah.

911
00:44:42,880 --> 00:44:44,719
Speaker 1: So like she came up and she was like like

912
00:44:45,200 --> 00:44:48,360
Speaker 1: she was like felt like I have no idea. I

913
00:44:48,400 --> 00:44:49,960
Speaker 1: think she was friends with Ask her about it.

914
00:44:50,200 --> 00:44:51,920
Speaker 3: What did you find out that your mom was a

915
00:44:52,000 --> 00:44:55,239
Speaker 3: character on the show before you? She's like huge, a

916
00:44:55,400 --> 00:44:56,160
Speaker 3: huge recurring.

917
00:44:56,600 --> 00:44:58,239
Speaker 4: I have to makeure this out because she's never met.

918
00:44:58,560 --> 00:45:02,040
Speaker 4: I just got bring into the space that she did

919
00:45:02,160 --> 00:45:05,120
Speaker 4: let me miss school the day after George died. I

920
00:45:05,239 --> 00:45:05,440
Speaker 4: had to.

921
00:45:06,200 --> 00:45:06,879
Speaker 6: That's such a fan.

922
00:45:07,000 --> 00:45:12,200
Speaker 4: I love it. Literally in the morning after, which like

923
00:45:12,840 --> 00:45:15,000
Speaker 4: not easy to miss the day at Harber Westley yea,

924
00:45:17,719 --> 00:45:18,560
Speaker 4: but she made.

925
00:45:18,520 --> 00:45:19,399
Speaker 3: That Georgia died.

926
00:45:20,400 --> 00:45:22,120
Speaker 1: I think she just like school today.

927
00:45:22,120 --> 00:45:23,800
Speaker 4: I think I was old enough that she didn't have

928
00:45:23,880 --> 00:45:25,840
Speaker 4: to call, but it was sort of like you can's

929
00:45:26,080 --> 00:45:28,600
Speaker 4: and I was like, I can't speak to anyone or

930
00:45:28,680 --> 00:45:29,080
Speaker 4: do anything.

931
00:45:30,239 --> 00:45:34,239
Speaker 1: I was. I inherited his trailer when he left. I

932
00:45:34,320 --> 00:45:38,360
Speaker 1: got that's the trailer I got. And so I was

933
00:45:38,400 --> 00:45:40,400
Speaker 1: their fifth season, so I think that was the season

934
00:45:40,480 --> 00:45:42,759
Speaker 1: that he died at the end of that, right, and

935
00:45:42,800 --> 00:45:46,080
Speaker 1: I remember it being like super top secret when he

936
00:45:46,160 --> 00:45:47,520
Speaker 1: came you know, when he comes back and he does

937
00:45:47,560 --> 00:45:50,919
Speaker 1: that's the scene where he comes out of the elevator. Yeah, yeah,

938
00:45:50,960 --> 00:45:53,760
Speaker 1: that was super top secret. Like I don't even actually

939
00:45:53,760 --> 00:45:54,400
Speaker 1: think I knew.

940
00:45:54,200 --> 00:45:56,400
Speaker 3: It that I did. You have to sit the trailer

941
00:45:56,480 --> 00:45:57,160
Speaker 3: when he came back.

942
00:45:57,560 --> 00:45:59,320
Speaker 1: No, I mean no, because the next season I was

943
00:45:59,360 --> 00:46:02,880
Speaker 1: made a regular so okay season in that trailer and

944
00:46:03,000 --> 00:46:06,279
Speaker 1: then yeah, and then I remember he had left some

945
00:46:06,400 --> 00:46:08,000
Speaker 1: things in it and I found them, and I remember

946
00:46:08,040 --> 00:46:10,800
Speaker 1: being like, what do I do with this thing? I

947
00:46:10,840 --> 00:46:13,200
Speaker 1: could probably sell this any favor at no.

948
00:46:13,440 --> 00:46:17,480
Speaker 4: Wonder you were probably I just can't. It feels wrong

949
00:46:17,520 --> 00:46:19,760
Speaker 4: to say for you, But like my two favorite characters,

950
00:46:19,920 --> 00:46:24,600
Speaker 4: maybe it was the trailers, like I need to bring

951
00:46:24,680 --> 00:46:27,520
Speaker 4: into the space that. Looking back, definitely, Calzona was my

952
00:46:27,600 --> 00:46:29,239
Speaker 4: gay awakening and I just didn't see it.

953
00:46:30,400 --> 00:46:32,640
Speaker 1: A lot of people I didn't know this, so wait,

954
00:46:33,320 --> 00:46:35,200
Speaker 1: you had not wait tell me this?

955
00:46:35,680 --> 00:46:41,480
Speaker 4: What was obsessed on a different level. And looking back,

956
00:46:41,560 --> 00:46:44,600
Speaker 4: I'm like, oh, there there's so many kind of signs.

957
00:46:44,600 --> 00:46:45,640
Speaker 4: I think a lot because you were not.

958
00:46:45,680 --> 00:46:48,239
Speaker 6: Out yet, No, I think, but not, I don't know

959
00:46:48,320 --> 00:46:48,680
Speaker 6: your story.

960
00:46:48,719 --> 00:46:49,399
Speaker 1: When did you come out?

961
00:46:50,120 --> 00:46:53,600
Speaker 4: So I it wasn't that I was like keeping something

962
00:46:53,719 --> 00:46:56,640
Speaker 4: inside that I was not letting out. It was like

963
00:46:56,760 --> 00:47:01,080
Speaker 4: I hadn't put the pieces clicked in together my own body,

964
00:47:01,200 --> 00:47:03,640
Speaker 4: and then the second I knew, I came out kind

965
00:47:03,640 --> 00:47:07,480
Speaker 4: of immediately once I figured out because I'm incapable of

966
00:47:07,560 --> 00:47:09,480
Speaker 4: keeping anything inside my brain body and.

967
00:47:12,120 --> 00:47:12,920
Speaker 1: Benefited from that.

968
00:47:13,800 --> 00:47:17,239
Speaker 4: Yeah, my wife was like, honestly, like the speed at

969
00:47:17,239 --> 00:47:20,480
Speaker 4: which you kind of put the pieces together, we started

970
00:47:20,560 --> 00:47:23,080
Speaker 4: dating and then came out. I was like twenty four hours.

971
00:47:24,239 --> 00:47:28,480
Speaker 4: But I I just I think it's a much more

972
00:47:28,520 --> 00:47:31,640
Speaker 4: common queer experience than I think people talk about often.

973
00:47:31,719 --> 00:47:34,399
Speaker 4: And I think the show really did a great job

974
00:47:34,480 --> 00:47:38,560
Speaker 4: of that with Kelly of like of like, you think

975
00:47:38,680 --> 00:47:40,440
Speaker 4: you're one thing, everyone tells you one thing, and you're

976
00:47:40,480 --> 00:47:43,480
Speaker 4: not mad at that thing. It's just something maybe doesn't

977
00:47:43,520 --> 00:47:47,000
Speaker 4: feel one hundred percent right. It wasn't like I I

978
00:47:47,160 --> 00:47:49,080
Speaker 4: was like, you know, the men I've dated in the

979
00:47:49,120 --> 00:47:51,440
Speaker 4: past I had great fulness for and you know, they

980
00:47:51,480 --> 00:47:54,319
Speaker 4: were good, nice people, and everything was fine, but there

981
00:47:54,400 --> 00:47:57,239
Speaker 4: was just something missing. I didn't understand. I always I

982
00:47:57,239 --> 00:48:01,200
Speaker 4: didn't understand songs, like I didn't understand songs until I'm

983
00:48:01,200 --> 00:48:03,680
Speaker 4: at Bond and then I was like, oh, these songs

984
00:48:03,760 --> 00:48:04,320
Speaker 4: makes sense.

985
00:48:05,360 --> 00:48:08,480
Speaker 1: That's very romantic, that's very romantic and very well, like

986
00:48:08,640 --> 00:48:09,480
Speaker 1: just very eloquent.

987
00:48:10,760 --> 00:48:13,759
Speaker 4: I yeah, yeah, looking back, the writing was on the

988
00:48:13,800 --> 00:48:14,680
Speaker 4: wall with the colsone it.

989
00:48:15,480 --> 00:48:16,040
Speaker 2: I love that.

990
00:48:16,280 --> 00:48:17,520
Speaker 6: I love that you hear that.

991
00:48:17,680 --> 00:48:19,440
Speaker 1: I feel like we hear that. We hear that.

992
00:48:19,719 --> 00:48:22,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, because weren't you. I mean, how many gay

993
00:48:22,080 --> 00:48:23,200
Speaker 3: couples were on TV?

994
00:48:23,520 --> 00:48:25,719
Speaker 1: There were not. And as a matter of fact, so

995
00:48:26,280 --> 00:48:29,920
Speaker 1: and obviously Callie's journey and Arizona's journey were very different,

996
00:48:30,239 --> 00:48:34,200
Speaker 1: very different, and Arizona's was very much she was so

997
00:48:34,360 --> 00:48:37,040
Speaker 1: resolved about it. It was there was there was just

998
00:48:37,239 --> 00:48:41,400
Speaker 1: no there was no apology, there was no doubt, there

999
00:48:41,520 --> 00:48:43,400
Speaker 1: was no maybe there was.

1000
00:48:43,640 --> 00:48:45,239
Speaker 4: This is who I am and apologetic.

1001
00:48:45,520 --> 00:48:47,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, I've known who I I know who I am.

1002
00:48:47,680 --> 00:48:49,879
Speaker 1: I've always known who I am, and this is who

1003
00:48:49,920 --> 00:48:50,120
Speaker 1: I am.

1004
00:48:50,760 --> 00:48:53,239
Speaker 5: And in fact, when we go to conventions, people have

1005
00:48:53,440 --> 00:48:56,040
Speaker 5: her like they have you write quotes right on stuff

1006
00:48:56,120 --> 00:48:57,800
Speaker 5: or maybe they want tattoos, and your quote that you

1007
00:48:57,920 --> 00:48:58,719
Speaker 5: always get is.

1008
00:48:59,560 --> 00:49:01,919
Speaker 1: Well, there's a good man in a storm, but there's

1009
00:49:02,000 --> 00:49:06,560
Speaker 1: one that's like, I'm the the gayest of gays, the lesbianic.

1010
00:49:07,520 --> 00:49:09,080
Speaker 4: Yeah, and I think that that, but I think it

1011
00:49:09,200 --> 00:49:10,840
Speaker 4: sids up who Arizona is.

1012
00:49:11,080 --> 00:49:14,600
Speaker 5: And it's just like unapologetic you're talking about Yeah, guess

1013
00:49:14,640 --> 00:49:15,680
Speaker 5: why people love that quote?

1014
00:49:15,800 --> 00:49:16,000
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1015
00:49:16,400 --> 00:49:18,239
Speaker 1: And I was as an actor, I would always sort

1016
00:49:18,239 --> 00:49:19,680
Speaker 1: of say to the writers like, but don't I have

1017
00:49:19,760 --> 00:49:22,000
Speaker 1: to have like some like isn't that isn't that like

1018
00:49:22,120 --> 00:49:24,319
Speaker 1: my obstacle? Like doesn't there have to be something where

1019
00:49:24,400 --> 00:49:27,520
Speaker 1: she doubts something? And they were always which I think

1020
00:49:27,560 --> 00:49:32,080
Speaker 1: absolutely came from Shonda. It was always yeah, hard, no, no,

1021
00:49:32,480 --> 00:49:34,440
Speaker 1: she knows who she is. And I was like, all right,

1022
00:49:34,480 --> 00:49:36,000
Speaker 1: I guess I just don't play the conflict.

1023
00:49:36,719 --> 00:49:38,720
Speaker 4: But I think that that's so great.

1024
00:49:39,440 --> 00:49:40,759
Speaker 1: No, no, no, Looking back on an hour, I was

1025
00:49:40,800 --> 00:49:43,000
Speaker 1: just being an actress being like, yeah, you always.

1026
00:49:42,760 --> 00:49:46,040
Speaker 4: Want yeah, yeah, And then they took your leg and

1027
00:49:46,120 --> 00:49:46,880
Speaker 4: you were like you.

1028
00:49:49,239 --> 00:49:52,560
Speaker 6: I know, yeah, here I asked for conflict.

1029
00:49:53,160 --> 00:49:53,400
Speaker 4: I am.

1030
00:49:53,719 --> 00:49:53,919
Speaker 5: Yeah.

1031
00:49:54,400 --> 00:49:56,799
Speaker 1: I have loved having you here. I feel like there's

1032
00:49:56,840 --> 00:49:58,759
Speaker 1: just another layer of you that I know, and I'm

1033
00:49:58,800 --> 00:50:02,800
Speaker 1: gonna hold it close and and I hope that I

1034
00:50:02,920 --> 00:50:04,680
Speaker 1: just wish you the very very your best, and I

1035
00:50:04,719 --> 00:50:05,799
Speaker 1: hope that you come back on again.

1036
00:50:06,080 --> 00:50:07,920
Speaker 5: And I just have to say, when we first started

1037
00:50:07,960 --> 00:50:10,440
Speaker 5: this podcast, before we'd even done the first one, they

1038
00:50:10,480 --> 00:50:12,600
Speaker 5: were like, give us a list of people that you

1039
00:50:13,120 --> 00:50:13,960
Speaker 5: want on the pod and.

1040
00:50:14,040 --> 00:50:14,919
Speaker 3: You were on my list.

1041
00:50:15,040 --> 00:50:16,839
Speaker 1: I was like, Beanie, it's true.

1042
00:50:17,040 --> 00:50:18,680
Speaker 4: I have to say the same thing back, which is

1043
00:50:18,760 --> 00:50:20,799
Speaker 4: like I only want to do these types of things

1044
00:50:20,880 --> 00:50:24,000
Speaker 4: with people that I really like, adore and people that

1045
00:50:24,080 --> 00:50:26,200
Speaker 4: I know. You know, it's a lot to like bear

1046
00:50:26,239 --> 00:50:31,000
Speaker 4: your soul, you know. Yeah, And I just the second

1047
00:50:31,080 --> 00:50:33,080
Speaker 4: it came in, it was like, Yes, it was the

1048
00:50:33,120 --> 00:50:36,000
Speaker 4: same thing when I when the actual grades offer came in,

1049
00:50:36,080 --> 00:50:39,839
Speaker 4: I was like, I'm manifesting. I love.

1050
00:50:40,480 --> 00:50:43,719
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, Beanie, gonna win some time to come

1051
00:50:43,800 --> 00:50:46,719
Speaker 1: back on any time. Beanie, Thank you guys so much.

1052
00:50:46,960 --> 00:50:48,640
Speaker 3: Bye bye bye,