Speaker 1: I've been in rooms with Blake Griffin and his intimidating.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I met him once. I hated it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it doesn't make you feel like a human.
Speaker 2: Being anymore, not a man one, not a male one.
Speaker 2: That's because you're like his hands or three of my hands.
Speaker 1: And he's not. He's he's way skinnier than he appears
Speaker 1: on TV. So he's also like just it's like clearly
Speaker 1: a dude with abs and the old hands and muscles.
Speaker 1: And you're like, all right, bro, that's a cheat code.
Speaker 2: You can't do that, you know. Don't come over here
Speaker 2: being funny. I'm gonna have to kill this man.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you ain't funny to me, bitch.
Speaker 2: Yeah, ain't funny. This clock.
Speaker 1: Empty the clip on your big But I'll take you down.
Speaker 2: Fuck, it's me and you. I don't give a ship
Speaker 2: ready to die today.
Speaker 3: That's a chips in your eas Quali bears are racist,
Speaker 3: the player Fox, the money turning stuff. Y'all can't tell me.
Speaker 1: I want to get with you, but I can't right now.
Speaker 2: Maybe, Girland, that's the issue.
Speaker 1: Through the phone.
Speaker 2: Welcome to another episode of My I've Told Me.
Speaker 1: The podcast when we dive deep, deep into the pockets
Speaker 1: of black cospiracy theories.
Speaker 2: And we finally work to prove that if you connect
Speaker 2: the dots on Morgan Freeman's face, it is a interstellar
Speaker 2: celestial map pointing directly to the black planet that Public
Speaker 2: Enemy told y'all to be feared about. I'm David Borden, WHOA.
Speaker 1: I'm like snick Herman, and okay, let me let me
Speaker 1: make sure I'm understanding this correctly.
Speaker 2: Get it.
Speaker 1: Public Enemy tells us of a planet of black people.
Speaker 1: Mm hmm, this legendary black planet in their in their music.
Speaker 1: And then Morgan Freeman is actually the source, the the map,
Speaker 1: the code that could lead us to said black planet.
Speaker 2: He's the fifth element for black people. Fuck, he's our
Speaker 2: fifth element.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: And it's not He's not the first one. There's always
Speaker 2: been a Morgan Freeman. He is actually a part of
Speaker 2: a secret group who are the keepers of the map.
Speaker 1: I like this because it does imply that this is
Speaker 1: just being passed down through time. There's a level of
Speaker 1: truth almost to it this way, whereas like if he
Speaker 1: was just born with a map on his face, it's like,
Speaker 1: now get the fuck out of here. We're not We're
Speaker 1: not mystics. We are real people who have shared a
Speaker 1: history with the people that come after us.
Speaker 2: It's like the Knights of Templar for niggas.
Speaker 1: Whoa damn hell. Yeah, thanks, I'm in, Thank you, I'm in.
Speaker 1: And if I meet him, I'm gonna start drawing on
Speaker 1: his old face immediately, immediately, I'm gonna get a permanent market.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say, excuse me, mister, doctor Freeman. You've got
Speaker 1: a doctorate somewhere.
Speaker 2: Somebody gave him one.
Speaker 1: You've been on this earth too long not to be
Speaker 1: a doctor. With that voice, Doctor Morgan Freeman, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: need you to step aside because I got some coloring
Speaker 1: to do.
Speaker 2: Exactly. My plan is to become good friends with him
Speaker 2: infiltrated social circle, have a child, name him the child's godfather.
Speaker 2: When the child gets old enough to sit on his lap,
Speaker 2: I give him a sharp and he does it for me.
Speaker 2: Then we all laugh while I furiously take notes.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, see. My only issue with that take is
Speaker 1: I wouldn't sit no child on Morgan Freeman's lap. He
Speaker 1: had sex with his step granddaughter, and frankly that that
Speaker 1: makes me nervous about how far you would take it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's true. I forgot he's a perd.
Speaker 1: Yeah, listen, I think I think that's right. I think
Speaker 1: Margan Breeman just wanted to I think he was eighty
Speaker 1: eight to one hundred and forty six years old, and
Speaker 1: he said, I want pussy more than I care about
Speaker 1: the morality of a planet that I'm not going to
Speaker 1: be on for much longer.
Speaker 2: Butch is because he understands the truth of the black planet.
Speaker 1: Yeah, He's like, I'm not even from here, dog, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm going back home. I've got a map on my face.
Speaker 2: And did he just have sex with her or was
Speaker 2: it like a relationship.
Speaker 1: I think it was like a real relationship. Yeah, if
Speaker 1: I'm not mistaken, and I could be mistaken, but my
Speaker 1: understanding is they were in a real relationship and she
Speaker 1: was actually murdered by her ex boyfriend when he found
Speaker 1: out that she essentially was like having this affair with
Speaker 1: Morgan Freeman.
Speaker 2: Do you think it was he was more upset that
Speaker 2: she was fucking her grandpa or the dude from driving
Speaker 2: Miss Daisy.
Speaker 1: It is. I think I think maybe lean on Me
Speaker 1: might have been the no was a cool one, that's
Speaker 1: where it is. Yeah, But I think that's when he
Speaker 1: starts going like you're imagining him yelling at you and
Speaker 1: telling you to stand up straight and shit, and he's like, oh,
Speaker 1: fuck this dude.
Speaker 2: He's holding that mister Clark.
Speaker 4: Mister Clark.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that that's playing in his head and
Speaker 1: he's like, nah, I can't I can't live like this.
Speaker 1: Oh well, complicated life on that guy. Yeah, Morgan's made
Speaker 1: it a long time, and maybe if you make it
Speaker 1: that long, you can do whatever the fuck you want.
Speaker 2: Who knows, hopefully not.
Speaker 1: That's why I'm gonna die at fifty three, just to
Speaker 1: make sure I don't turn into a scoundrel.
Speaker 2: To be fair, that's a black seventy six.
Speaker 1: Come on, I made it a good long time.
Speaker 2: I was like that far. Oh yeah, I'm dark skinned.
Speaker 2: I got four years left.
Speaker 1: And listeners, you better make it a good for you.
Speaker 1: You've got a lot of responsibility on your shoulders. Make
Speaker 1: my boy happy for his final little collegiate run.
Speaker 2: No, I'm doing okay. I quit eating meat for a
Speaker 2: while recently, though. It's freaking me out.
Speaker 1: WHOA like you? You had eaten so much meat that
Speaker 1: you were like, I gotta get off this meat. Don't
Speaker 1: do that to me, I gotta get off this meat,
Speaker 1: is what you said to yourself.
Speaker 2: I just wanted to see if I could do it.
Speaker 2: It makes your inside.
Speaker 1: Stinky though not being on meat.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like I've been farting like crazy. Oh damn, yeah,
Speaker 2: farting and poops a while. So we said I gotta
Speaker 2: take some B twelve. I'm also it's just like I
Speaker 2: just wanted to see if I could do for a
Speaker 2: little bit.
Speaker 1: So it's like at the we we had a we
Speaker 1: should let the listeners know. We had our live show
Speaker 1: in Denver recently at Thanks for the Coming Festival. Thank
Speaker 1: you for coming out those of you that did. It
Speaker 1: was packed, it was fun. We certainly had a good time.
Speaker 1: We don't give a ship how you felt about it.
Speaker 1: That said, there was a barbecue and you're wearing the
Speaker 1: hat from your your annual barbecue. It says race wars
Speaker 1: where uh, and it is a double entendre for those
Speaker 1: who are who are.
Speaker 2: Kind of right on the nose of what is anything
Speaker 2: else going on there where?
Speaker 1: Bory commissions young, young, and old people to foot race
Speaker 1: each other based on race, and uh, it's not ethnic background.
Speaker 2: That comes into play. It was not the point initially.
Speaker 1: Sure, Yeah, but it is the motivation.
Speaker 2: Now I would say it's one thing I like about it.
Speaker 1: That said, I guess the question that i'd ask is
Speaker 1: at this barbecue, were you not eating meat? Did you
Speaker 1: not have any of WHOA?
Speaker 2: Yeah? I ate right before I came, because it was
Speaker 2: because I knew it was going to be all this barbecue.
Speaker 1: So you were just sustaining yourself on on peer passion
Speaker 1: for watching people race each other.
Speaker 2: Yeah, in racial politics, Damn, that's beautiful, right.
Speaker 1: That teaches us that that you don't need food, you
Speaker 1: just need to watch a white man run against a
Speaker 1: black man.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Shot the black people though only one loss. Yeah,
Speaker 2: and we will not say his name.
Speaker 1: And I do have footage.
Speaker 2: Shamed him terribly.
Speaker 1: I not only shamed him, I then spent what should
Speaker 1: have been my nap time afterwards editing a video. You
Speaker 1: came back that night with the video, a fully edited
Speaker 1: video of him losing the race. It was hilarious, So
Speaker 1: I couldn't be prouder of it, and I've watched it
Speaker 1: every day since.
Speaker 2: When you showed him the video, he said.
Speaker 1: Why why would you? Why did you how did you know? Look? Man,
Speaker 1: you lose a foot race to a white man, and
Speaker 1: this is what happens.
Speaker 2: He should have.
Speaker 1: Known better, running into with jeans one jeans on. That's true.
Speaker 2: The young boys can do that. Like the youngest guy
Speaker 2: who was the fastest. He had jeans unlaced, Jordan ones
Speaker 2: and he refused to tie them up. Yeah, and he
Speaker 2: still smoked everybody. Shout you know what, I'll give him
Speaker 2: a shoutout.
Speaker 1: He deserves it.
Speaker 2: Shout out to Eland stribbling. Hell, yeah, the fastest fastest
Speaker 2: young black man.
Speaker 1: Alive, as far as I can tell. Yeah, Yeah, I
Speaker 1: don't know that many young black people anymore. So, as
Speaker 1: far as I know, he's the fastest. And until somebody
Speaker 1: beats him, that's that's my number one.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we said tied shoes. He said, don't need to.
Speaker 1: He's I'm good, I don't need that.
Speaker 2: And then he then he smoked everybody.
Speaker 1: And he didn't need to, and he beat a fair
Speaker 1: amount of people.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he only lost this AJ who had his shoes
Speaker 2: tied and was wearing hose shorts.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be honest with you, I don't really think
Speaker 1: he lost. The AJ. AJ kept saying he did, bro.
Speaker 2: And I think A needed it. So we had to
Speaker 2: keep it there, but I.
Speaker 1: Didn't want to say anything, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: I didn't want to take that from him. I'm like, bro,
Speaker 1: you you were a D one athlete. Yeah, you've earned
Speaker 1: the right to declare your victory over this young man,
Speaker 1: and you got that. But like as a as a
Speaker 1: very vocal observer, that.
Speaker 2: Nigga, that nigga didn't win no race. Yeah, that's the
Speaker 2: best part is the vocal man. Listen, if you guys
Speaker 2: are listening to this, you want to fun barbecue activity, Get.
Speaker 1: Him a race, make people race each other.
Speaker 2: It's so good.
Speaker 1: It's really good until somebody gets hurt. And thankfully nobody
Speaker 1: got hurt. Yeah, but he was seriously injured, luckily because
Speaker 1: they were doing it cold. People were racing off a
Speaker 1: two barbecue like to barbecue sandwiches.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I didn't see a single person stretched.
Speaker 2: All days, not one at all.
Speaker 1: We should get into this conspiracy. I'm sure you all
Speaker 1: can tell at this point this is a Langston and
Speaker 1: David David and Langston episode. This isn't there ain't no guest.
Speaker 1: We just bullshitting.
Speaker 2: Yeah, nobody's like in the cut waiting to talk.
Speaker 1: What if they were though, and we just wasted all
Speaker 1: that time.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and now welcome our guests.
Speaker 1: She's like, what's up y'all? Bat makes me wait this
Speaker 1: long to talk too. Oh yeah, it's fun.
Speaker 2: I like, I love her.
Speaker 1: She's great.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: That said, we we have a conspiracy theory. This was
Speaker 1: your pitch. You pitched a conspiracy that. I was very
Speaker 1: excited to hear that that. I don't think has come
Speaker 1: up ever on the podcast. If it has, it was
Speaker 1: like an ancient mini episode, but it is certainly has
Speaker 1: never been a more substantial conversation. But you said my
Speaker 1: mama told me Mozart was black. I actually am one
Speaker 1: point four percent Nigerian African. I'm a sister.
Speaker 2: Okay ah, yes, and tell me everything. You know. Here's
Speaker 2: a funny thing. I don't. It's just it's a weird
Speaker 2: thing that's come up because when I was thinking about
Speaker 2: it after I pitched it. It's because it came up.
Speaker 2: Where did it come up? Oh, I'll talk to some
Speaker 2: niggas brou But I just feel like outside talking to people.
Speaker 1: You man, what do you know about Mozart?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, my block is active, so like I'll be
Speaker 2: on the phone on the block sometimes because I don't
Speaker 2: want to talk to everybody. Anyways, I've heard it so
Speaker 2: many times, and I realized as soon as I pitched
Speaker 2: it to you that I do not have I've never
Speaker 2: heard any backup other than it just being like, hey,
Speaker 2: you know what, the Mozart was black? Right, And then
Speaker 2: I kind of looked into what made I looked up
Speaker 2: what made Mozart's music unique, Like maybe on some like
Speaker 2: type of maybe there was something like some black trait
Speaker 2: of what he did, but it's really nothing other than
Speaker 2: absolute Michael Jordan level mastery of the craft. Right, he
Speaker 2: was a multi genre. I didn't know he was a
Speaker 2: multi genre over like high output, over six hundred works
Speaker 2: virtuoso right first started composing of five. So there's really
Speaker 2: no there's nothing I have to time to black people
Speaker 2: other than his greatness, you know what I mean. Feels
Speaker 2: like it could be a Michael Jordan type situation.
Speaker 1: Right, You're like, this is legendary work, not unlike so
Speaker 1: many of our black icons. Exactly black person exactly when
Speaker 1: you said this, and this is worth noting, I too
Speaker 1: had heard people say that Mozart is black, but more
Speaker 1: often I think what I had heard was that Beethoven
Speaker 1: is black. That's that's the one that I think i've
Speaker 1: I've heard the most, and so I was surprised a
Speaker 1: little bit when when Mozart came down the line, But
Speaker 1: I was excited because I certainly it gave me a
Speaker 1: reason to look up a bunch of shit that to
Speaker 1: your point, everybody that's ever told me either of them
Speaker 1: was black never backed it up with any evidence. They
Speaker 1: were just like, yeah, you know, they were black, and
Speaker 1: then they sometimes are like and they were deaf and
Speaker 1: blind and had no arms, and they still made the
Speaker 1: best music ever.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I heard they only had sex with women in
Speaker 2: the butt because they didn't want to get caught up
Speaker 2: having babies.
Speaker 1: You ain't gonna get my Mozart money, you know.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Also, I uh so, I will say, full disclosure,
Speaker 2: I could have heard the Beethoven thing as well and
Speaker 2: just conflated the two. In my mind, there's not one
Speaker 2: thing that's like distinctively Beethoven or Mozart that would make
Speaker 2: me remember one or the other in any of these situations.
Speaker 1: I don't know the difference between the two of them
Speaker 1: even for a second.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know, the Beethoven's fifth or whatever, the one
Speaker 2: from the movie Beethoven dud dun dum.
Speaker 1: Okay, I don't know. I could be wrong, you might
Speaker 1: be right. It's the fifth I know he's got He's
Speaker 1: got one through nine. That people yo that first little
Speaker 1: like EP, he dropped whatever.
Speaker 2: Then those first three movies went hard.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Beethove.
Speaker 2: Not for me.
Speaker 1: You can really tell that's not the same dog, you know, Yeah.
Speaker 2: He just I think he got rich. There was. It
Speaker 2: was a money grab. That dog got rich.
Speaker 1: The dog got Richie he started doing weird stuff with
Speaker 1: his money.
Speaker 2: Yeah, the dog got a monkey. It was fucked up.
Speaker 1: So long, and there's like that dead space before it
Speaker 1: starts with that. You can hear that something's happening, but
Speaker 1: you don't know what the fuck is happening.
Speaker 2: No, I know, we might have to cut it down.
Speaker 2: We also have one on here. I don't even know
Speaker 2: what it means.
Speaker 1: I'm excited at present.
Speaker 2: I want you to know this.
Speaker 5: If your prayers include me to stop drinking, stop smoking,
Speaker 5: and stop having fun and stop.
Speaker 2: Watching these little bitches popped the ass.
Speaker 5: If your prayers include any of those things, it's not
Speaker 5: gonna work because of rejecting them all. And I will
Speaker 5: be continued in my saying. We could ask motherfucking ways.
Speaker 5: I gets it that the way you want to put I.
Speaker 1: Think you should label that one the Lord or it's
Speaker 1: prayer and.
Speaker 2: Got to tat it on my chest.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I think I'd easily identify it that way.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's a good call here. I didn't know what
Speaker 2: that was. Some of them are named really well, though
Speaker 2: not as straightforward as you think.
Speaker 1: That said. I certainly have heard that Mozart is black.
Speaker 1: I've certainly heard that Beethoven is black. I think before
Speaker 1: we jump into this research, I guess the big question
Speaker 1: I would ask you is how much do you actually
Speaker 1: believe this?
Speaker 2: I mean, here's the thing. I definitely believe, like we've
Speaker 2: talked about, like like Frederick Douglas and shit like that.
Speaker 2: I definitely believe in the changing of one's traits to
Speaker 2: fit whatever history narrative is. And I think that there
Speaker 2: is the distance between us and Mozart so large that
Speaker 2: of course things could have been changed over time. And
Speaker 2: I think I think that like back in that era,
Speaker 2: it would be much easier to convert someone back then
Speaker 2: from anything to white than it would be now. Like nobody,
Speaker 2: You're not gonna be able to come out and be
Speaker 2: like Drake wasn't black one hundred years from now, because
Speaker 2: we've got videos and things like that. Yeah, but I
Speaker 2: think back then and like especially not a lot of
Speaker 2: people read like it's pretty easy to just control that
Speaker 2: narrative and flip it. So like, I, yeah, I don't.
Speaker 2: I don't have any proofs, So I'm not gonna gonna
Speaker 2: say I fully believe it, but I definitely think it's possible,
Speaker 2: no questions.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel similarly. I think there's literally no pictures
Speaker 1: of Mozart. It's not possible. The photography was not invented
Speaker 1: when this motherfucker was around, and so like everything is
Speaker 1: just a depiction of these people, and the depictions vary.
Speaker 1: There are times where you look at some of the
Speaker 1: drawings and paintings of these individuals and they do they
Speaker 1: don't even look like the person that was drawn in
Speaker 1: the other picture. And they're both white guys. So the
Speaker 1: possibility that maybe some of the features were reshaped, the
Speaker 1: coloring was was, you know, reimagined, whatever it is, None
Speaker 1: of that feels out of the realm of possibility in
Speaker 1: this case exactly exactly.
Speaker 2: And where is he from? England?
Speaker 1: Yeah, Mozarts from I think Austria. If I'm not mistaken,
Speaker 1: it's yeah, listen, he's from Arnold Schwarzenegger Town versus the
Speaker 1: other guys. Yeah, I think you know there their origins
Speaker 1: are so foreign to me and they're in the Truthfully,
Speaker 1: even what we know about them is so minimal in
Speaker 1: some ways that like there are all these things that
Speaker 1: you sort of discover and reading about these guys that
Speaker 1: frankly have not necessarily been proven or just speculation, including
Speaker 1: whether or not they could hear or see, and so
Speaker 1: it's like, yeah, maybe they could have also been black.
Speaker 1: None of us know anything.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I also don't know it doesn't sound terrible.
Speaker 2: I don't know where black people were in the world
Speaker 2: at that time. I don't know if there were lots
Speaker 2: of black people on Europe, you know, does that make sense? Yeah,
Speaker 2: the dispersion of black people at that time in the world,
Speaker 2: I don't know, because like now you go to Paris,
Speaker 2: it's like again of black people, But like, I don't
Speaker 2: know if it was like that three hundred years ago.
Speaker 1: And I think that's part of the sort of like
Speaker 1: intentional manipulation of history, right, Like, even if we're not
Speaker 1: saying definitively that Mozart or Beethoven or whoever is black.
Speaker 1: I think there has been sort of like this intentional
Speaker 1: manipulation to make it feel as if Europe was a
Speaker 1: white place at all times, that like this was just
Speaker 1: a place where white people originated or built or whatever
Speaker 1: it is, and they dominated this space. And to some
Speaker 1: extent that may have been true.
Speaker 2: But I think.
Speaker 1: There's also a massive population of European people who were
Speaker 1: dark skinned, people who were black, who were from other
Speaker 1: countries originally and then migrated to these spaces, and it's
Speaker 1: not really acknowledged throughout history. And really even now as
Speaker 1: a world traveler, there are times where I go places
Speaker 1: and I'm surprised at how large the black population.
Speaker 2: Is everywhere I went to Europe. Everywhere I went to Europe,
Speaker 2: I was like very surprised. Yeah, like specifically France, but
Speaker 2: everywhere where it was like, oh, this was I thought
Speaker 2: we had no footprint here, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: And it's a big one. We have a big foot yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and they don't talk. I mean I heard Australia doesn't
Speaker 1: have a lot of us. Yeah, I didn't see it.
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna lie to you. I wouldn't.
Speaker 2: Uh.
Speaker 1: I wasn't wowed by the numbers when I went out
Speaker 1: there and just.
Speaker 2: Speaking Australia, not a little black fellers. Yeah, it's funny
Speaker 2: to be too.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I love that. God damn it. All right, we're
Speaker 1: gonna take a break. We'll be back with more at
Speaker 1: lengths than more, David and more. My mama told me, you.
Speaker 2: Think the bigger the booty, the finer idiot, And now
Speaker 2: we can convince her.
Speaker 3: She walked switching that big old booty and all that,
Speaker 3: it ain't nothing but do.
Speaker 2: Do in there.
Speaker 1: It ain't nothing but do do in here either. You
Speaker 1: are back.
Speaker 2: My mama told me, we're talking about the possibility of
Speaker 2: whether most Mozart and maybe Beethoven was black.
Speaker 1: M possibly Beethoven, possibly Beethoven. So I did look this up.
Speaker 1: I did do a little bit of research on this,
Speaker 1: and one of the things that fascinated me most about
Speaker 1: this conspiracy, and we talked about this a little bit,
Speaker 1: is that even the people who entertained the theory, the
Speaker 1: theory like pretty substantially do plainly state that there is
Speaker 1: no definitive evidence of this claim Mozart being black. There
Speaker 1: is no definitive evidence whatsoever. However, they do point to
Speaker 1: a few pieces of small evidence that potentially suggest he
Speaker 1: has a hidden racial identity. That's all I need, That's
Speaker 1: all you need is a little taste. And I think
Speaker 1: this was the first clip of information. Would you say
Speaker 1: that you're racist? No, no, look at a dog.
Speaker 2: He's as black as can be, right, and.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and then it's sort of trees out from there.
Speaker 1: One of the first things that they point to is that,
Speaker 1: and this feels stupid to say out loud, but it is.
Speaker 1: Some of the information that I found is that his
Speaker 1: great great, great, great great great grandfather, that's a lot
Speaker 1: of them, it's six greats was born in this place
Speaker 1: called Lake Constance. I believe it's Germany, which is right
Speaker 1: on the border of Germany, Austria and Switzerland. It's in
Speaker 1: that weird sort of like trifecta area that the song
Speaker 1: of the Sound of Music was you know, them Niggas was.
Speaker 2: Right around that Bavaria.
Speaker 1: No, yeah, come on, man, what are you trying to
Speaker 1: put pressure on me that you know I didn't know
Speaker 1: the answer to.
Speaker 2: Wow, it's very pretty Oh you're.
Speaker 1: Looking it up. Yeah, yeah. Anyway, well, that's that's where
Speaker 1: his fucking six times. Granddaddy is from right, and they
Speaker 1: say that that place apparently was a very popular destination
Speaker 1: for African traders, and it creates an increased likelihood that
Speaker 1: someone from there would have African ancestry. That it's very
Speaker 1: likely based off of just being from that place, that
Speaker 1: is great great great great great great great grandfather was
Speaker 1: of African descent. In some way.
Speaker 2: I love the idea of these African traders, like I'm
Speaker 2: gonna go up to Germany sell these spices, get a
Speaker 2: little pussy.
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna knock down a bitch. I'm playing some
Speaker 1: seed and I'm riding out of there.
Speaker 2: I'm not gonna be back till, you know, next season
Speaker 2: when he needs some oil or whatever.
Speaker 1: The I'm gonna lift up my baby in her and
Speaker 1: get the fuck out down here. Yeah. Yeah, I'll be
Speaker 1: gone before the devil knows.
Speaker 2: I notuse You're just cool like this.
Speaker 1: Yeah there was a fly. Oh I was chewing your
Speaker 1: joke away. If that's how you took it.
Speaker 2: I thought you were like a grandpa.
Speaker 1: No, I was like, oh, David, you are some.
Speaker 2: So.
Speaker 1: Additionally, besides, like this very loose lineage that they attempt
Speaker 1: to trace for him, which even if that is true,
Speaker 1: this motherfucker would have been barely black, right, Yeah, big
Speaker 1: as l but it's not very dark. Biggest goddamn fuck.
Speaker 2: Anyways.
Speaker 1: The additional evidence there's this famous writer that was from
Speaker 1: his time, right from Mozart's time, This dude, Johann Wolfgang
Speaker 1: von Goeth. And why aren't we naming our kids like
Speaker 1: this anymore?
Speaker 2: I don't know, man, I like that a lot.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's pretty fucking cool. Johann Wolfgang von Goeth Goth.
Speaker 1: I don't I don't know. I say some of this ship,
Speaker 1: maybe Chris, it could be its g O E. T
Speaker 1: h e Keith Gith g wolf Gang von Rick Ross
Speaker 1: sound Luck nine thousand described Mozart as the Blackamore's delight.
Speaker 1: That that is how he described him. Now, when I
Speaker 1: heard that, it became very unclear to me he was
Speaker 1: saying that he's black or if he's saying like this
Speaker 1: is like a Bobby Caldwell situation, right, and niggas just
Speaker 1: like him a lot. You know what I mean?
Speaker 2: It sounds like a candy Yeah, you know what, like
Speaker 2: a candy in like the Lion the Witch on the world.
Speaker 1: It's like a big old fruit punch that you suck on.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but like in the in the in the in
Speaker 2: the can with the can opener, remember that this punch.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like a real you gotta work for this candy.
Speaker 1: It's fermenting.
Speaker 2: Also, don't drink it straight from the can. You'll go blind.
Speaker 1: You're gonna get real sick.
Speaker 2: That's how they got Ray Charles. He fell into some
Speaker 2: of that Hawaiian punching the can when he's a little kid.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he was eating all that that Blackamore's delight.
Speaker 2: As long as it's clean, I'll eat the black bush delight.
Speaker 4: Ah.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: And so that's that's the other piece of evidence. There
Speaker 1: are a few others. So another writer, Henry Gretrey, also
Speaker 1: described Mozart as quote unquote the little Negro, and then
Speaker 1: Mozart's biographer Herman Abert wrote that Mozart had a somewhat
Speaker 1: negroid appearance.
Speaker 2: See, and this is interesting to me because like, you
Speaker 2: know how you mean some people and you're like, man,
Speaker 2: I think there's some in there. You think it was
Speaker 2: like that kind of a thing. I think so, because
Speaker 2: it sounds like the characteristics must be at least broad
Speaker 2: nose and big lips, right, like to even get that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think it's like that Michelle Wolf shit right.
Speaker 2: Right, what if it was just like he could dance,
Speaker 2: that's an I don't know what I saw him hooping yesterday.
Speaker 1: Mozart just had hoop shorts underneath his tails. They're like, nah,
Speaker 1: a game could break out anywhere. Yeah yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 2: He took the powdered wig off. He said, it's time
Speaker 2: to go.
Speaker 1: The music is cool, but ball, it's life. I'm trying
Speaker 1: to hoop.
Speaker 2: I mean that second one, those dudes seem very You
Speaker 2: don't get that on accident, you know what I'm.
Speaker 1: Saying, Like if you're a little negro, like.
Speaker 2: I wouldn't call Michelle Wolf the little negro.
Speaker 1: No, and she would like it if you did. But no,
Speaker 1: you don't give her that. But like you know what
Speaker 1: I mean, Like that's like a very.
Speaker 2: That.
Speaker 1: That's that's very that. That seems like a tell to me.
Speaker 1: That feels big.
Speaker 4: M h.
Speaker 1: So the other piece of evidence that I actually think
Speaker 1: might be maybe the most substantial piece of information that
Speaker 1: I came across and reading about this ship is, uh,
Speaker 1: there was actually this dude, a a I guess contemporary
Speaker 1: of Mozart, although apparently he came first, but there was
Speaker 1: this French black musician named Joseph Bolonne Chevalier de Saint George's.
Speaker 2: Yeah, they just made a movie about him, did they. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I think it might still be in theaters.
Speaker 1: Oh shit, yeah, the Chevalier, Yeah Chevalier. Am I saying
Speaker 1: it wrong?
Speaker 2: You're did you think it was Chevalier?
Speaker 1: Yeah? I was like, I think it was a Chevy Cavalier.
Speaker 1: Chevy Cavalier got a movie about him. But that dude
Speaker 1: apparently was sort of the uh. They often referred to
Speaker 1: him as the black Mozart because he was composed the
Speaker 1: first black classical composer in history, and he's considered a
Speaker 1: major influence on Mozart, Like Mozart looked to him as
Speaker 1: like a motherfucker he fucks with, right.
Speaker 2: And it's like an Elvis situation.
Speaker 1: That's the problem, right, is that they call him the
Speaker 1: black Mozart, but he technically came before Mozart or they
Speaker 1: at least like existed at the same time. But because
Speaker 1: he was definitively a black man, a black man who
Speaker 1: came out of slavery and in the Caribbean and shit,
Speaker 1: they basically he couldn't reach the popularity that Mozart could reap,
Speaker 1: and so Mozart, despite the fact that they probably are
Speaker 1: contemporaries of each other and maybe even rivals. In some sense,
Speaker 1: Mozart gets all the acclaim as like the dude sort
Speaker 1: of inventing this cool, fucking, amazing style of shit, when
Speaker 1: in fact, my boy Chevy Cavalier was doing it the
Speaker 1: whole time, right.
Speaker 2: And then like twenty years later, at the Hip Hop
Speaker 2: Honors Award, Mozart is like, hey, I couldn't have done
Speaker 2: it without Chevy Cavalier. Yeah, you know, Cavalier's back. He's
Speaker 2: in Cleveland, his life is not going good.
Speaker 1: Nah, he's down bad baby, but he gets that shout
Speaker 1: out and he's like, see I told you and Joe
Speaker 1: Dumbas yeah yeah.
Speaker 2: His wife is like, are you gonna take out the trash?
Speaker 2: He's like, bitch, I could have been somebody.
Speaker 1: Them little shout outs don't feed your family, Chevy Cavalier.
Speaker 2: No.
Speaker 1: And so I do think in some ways maybe this
Speaker 1: black Mozart story, this history of Mozart being a black man,
Speaker 1: is in fact a conflation of the literal black quote
Speaker 1: unquote black Mozart that did exist, and we we just
Speaker 1: ignore because history made it that way.
Speaker 2: I that that is fair. I do wonder about though
Speaker 2: the direct descriptions of it are interesting. Maybe it's like,
Speaker 2: uh now, the more I'm thinking about it, though, like
Speaker 2: the idea of saying his face was negroid, that's almost
Speaker 2: how you know he wasn't black, right, Like, you don't
Speaker 2: have to describe my face as that because that's what.
Speaker 1: It looks like, right that they're sort of like just
Speaker 1: just trying to describe a funny looking man to them
Speaker 1: by using what they consider to be funny looking, which
Speaker 1: is negro features.
Speaker 2: Right right, right right, I mean you put the funny
Speaker 2: thing on it.
Speaker 1: I think I'm trying to speak for the people of
Speaker 1: the time period, not that I think that black people
Speaker 1: look funny looking. Yeah, oh facts, Come on, let me
Speaker 1: be clear. I don't think all of y'all are beautiful.
Speaker 1: I think some of y'all very odd. But I don't
Speaker 1: think that's a racial thing as much as a specific.
Speaker 2: That's a familiar thing. And it's like, yeah, I've never
Speaker 2: seen Craig mackin a leprecha in the same room.
Speaker 1: Come on, Sam, because what you got, yo, that's a
Speaker 1: weird face. But no, I it does seem like there
Speaker 1: may be is a little bit of a conflation here,
Speaker 1: and Mozart is Elvis to Chevy Cavaliers, little Richard.
Speaker 2: Damn, that's a that's a that that makes it also
Speaker 2: really it tales all this time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it does feel more honest that way.
Speaker 2: Yeah. History repeats itself over and over again as we
Speaker 2: find all the time, and that feels like that right.
Speaker 1: Now. I did also want to look up the Beethoven question, because,
Speaker 1: like I said, Beethoven was the thing that I'm more
Speaker 1: cowered the the suggestion I more commonly heard when I
Speaker 1: was a kid, And as it turns out, that almost
Speaker 1: has sort of an identical level of proof that it
Speaker 1: mostly is people sort of like suggesting that he had
Speaker 1: like negro Ish features. At one point, there's a little
Speaker 1: more definitive proof that he's just Flemish and not necessarily
Speaker 1: a black man, but a lot of people sort of
Speaker 1: saying he had like a black quality about him and
Speaker 1: all of that shit. That said, the Beethoven being black
Speaker 1: actually has a more substantial historical imprint than I realized.
Speaker 1: So there's this dude, this dude, Samuel Coleridge Taylor, who
Speaker 1: was this mixed British composer. He was half black British
Speaker 1: composer who started speculating that Beethoven.
Speaker 2: Was huh oh, I was just gonna say to Bridgman,
Speaker 2: getting interracial for a minute.
Speaker 1: Yeah. They they ended slavery way before we did, and
Speaker 1: they were like, we did it for a reason. We
Speaker 1: talked to fuck on each other all that ass in
Speaker 1: those bridges, in those pantaloons.
Speaker 4: That's how they get you.
Speaker 2: So who's okay, go ahead, sorry, I got you.
Speaker 1: No, this is that's exactly what you're meant to do this.
Speaker 1: Samuel Coleridge Taylor in nineteen oh seven starts speculating that
Speaker 1: Beethoven was black. His theory is mostly driven by him
Speaker 1: seeing pictures of Beethoven and saying that they shared a
Speaker 1: lot of the same features that Basically, he looks at
Speaker 1: Beethoven and goes, there's no way this dude, if he
Speaker 1: were born in our era, would be depicted the way
Speaker 1: that he's being depicted in a lot of these other
Speaker 1: pictures because of how much we look alike, both in
Speaker 1: skin color and the wideness of our nose, the thickness
Speaker 1: of our lips, all the shit. Right, So he starts
Speaker 1: spreading this rumor, and this rumor catches fire in sort
Speaker 1: of like this underground way, so much so that it
Speaker 1: actually becomes a major talking point in the civil rights
Speaker 1: movement that like during the era of like like our
Speaker 1: civil rights movement in the sixties and seventies, we're seeing
Speaker 1: our fifties and sixties more. We're seeing people like Malcolm
Speaker 1: X and Stokely Carmichael use Beethoven was Black as a
Speaker 1: talking point in their speeches and in sort of like
Speaker 1: their advocacy for black civil rights. And specifically they're not
Speaker 1: saying it on some like scientific shit like yo, we
Speaker 1: here's the evidence, as much as they are using it
Speaker 1: as sort of like a metaphor for the greatness of
Speaker 1: black people and the manipulation of black history. So they're
Speaker 1: using what ultimately is a rumor as a weapon of
Speaker 1: choice to basically be like, yo, our whole history as
Speaker 1: a human race, our greatest shit comes from Black people,
Speaker 1: and the fact that y'all can't acknowledge our humanity is
Speaker 1: your brokenness, not ours.
Speaker 2: I do love that. I'm in hell.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I love.
Speaker 2: Some good rhetoric.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And it did feel like that when I read it,
Speaker 1: where it was like, damn, I don't know that there's
Speaker 1: ever gonna be the definitive proof of these guys being black.
Speaker 1: But I'm not mad at it being a piece of
Speaker 1: rhetoric for the growth, the effectiveness, the salvation of our people,
Speaker 1: right that, Like, if this is just functions as a
Speaker 1: reminder that none of our history is necessarily proven and
Speaker 1: they could be black, then y'all, motherfuckers better take that
Speaker 1: seriously and treat us with the same respect you treat
Speaker 1: your greatest composers.
Speaker 2: Right I get. My question is, so for this to
Speaker 2: a PSU did a pretty long time, what is it
Speaker 2: that made this fart? Like for it to be a
Speaker 2: talking point just fifty years, sixty years ago? Was there
Speaker 2: some type of proof that came out to make it
Speaker 2: irrelevant in the last couple weeks, Like what took this
Speaker 2: out of fashion?
Speaker 1: I don't know that it has been taken out of fashion.
Speaker 2: I mean, I guess we've heard about it, and we've
Speaker 2: heard about it in the same type of context, right
Speaker 2: as it being like a hey, you know, which feels
Speaker 2: like what it was always you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: I think that's that's sort of the point, right is
Speaker 1: that like it cannot it can only go out of
Speaker 1: fashion if we stop repeating it to each other. And
Speaker 1: I think the reality is there is neither proof in
Speaker 1: either case. There is no proof that they are black,
Speaker 1: but there is no proof that they are not black.
Speaker 1: And all we can do is trace like family lineage
Speaker 1: and weird cartoons of these motherfuckers to decide whether or
Speaker 1: not they are in fact black.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and that okay, I will. I do want to
Speaker 2: say that I think, even though I just said I
Speaker 2: do like the rhetoric, I think there is a slippery
Speaker 2: slope of trying to use greatness to justify what should
Speaker 2: be just basic human decency or whatever, you know what
Speaker 2: I mean, Like, I don't think that we have to
Speaker 2: be the greatest composer to ever.
Speaker 1: Live to deserve.
Speaker 2: An equal piece of the pie. And I sometimes I
Speaker 2: get worried of that type of thing where it's like
Speaker 2: we want to take someone because they're great to justify
Speaker 2: what should we should just be getting.
Speaker 1: Anyways, Yeah, I don't disagree with you. I do sometimes
Speaker 1: find myself feeling frustrated by black people's want to sort
Speaker 1: of like prove our ownership inside of history as a
Speaker 1: way of life, I guess, advocating for ourselves when in fact,
Speaker 1: it should just be y know, we are human and
Speaker 1: therefore deserving of all of the things that every other
Speaker 1: human deserves.
Speaker 2: Because it also feels like trying to satisfy white standards
Speaker 2: and things.
Speaker 1: That said, I don't know that they can hear it
Speaker 1: any other way, and so I do recognize that, like,
Speaker 1: especially if we're talking about like the civil rights movement,
Speaker 1: it's sort of like this, this attempt to advocate for
Speaker 1: a group of people that, like literally the law is saying,
Speaker 1: are not people, or at least not the same level
Speaker 1: of people. I recognize where this holds value. It just
Speaker 1: feels a little cornier. In twenty twenty three, we still
Speaker 1: got to be like Beethoven was black because like Nigga,
Speaker 1: I don't listen to Beethoven. Yeah, I don't give a
Speaker 1: fuck about mozarts, you know what I mean, I don't
Speaker 1: none of that means anything. Yeah, it's like I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't need them too. Yeah, And I shouldn't need
Speaker 1: Tiger Woods to be able to like exists, especially given
Speaker 1: how little he fucks with anything I am and represent.
Speaker 2: Yeah exactly exactly. But all that, oh yeah, all that
Speaker 2: being said, I'm for this one. Yeah fuck yeah, sure, man, Yeah,
Speaker 2: maybe I'm gonna start telling people. I'm gonna tell people
Speaker 2: both of them. I'm gonna add some other ones.
Speaker 1: But boo, dumb, blind deaf men who made I guess
Speaker 1: the greatest songs of all time, apparently six hundred of them.
Speaker 1: We're black as hell, and and y'all can't say otherwise,
Speaker 1: prove it if they ain't.
Speaker 2: I think that movie that is the because I saw
Speaker 2: the ad for the movie, and I feel like there's
Speaker 2: a scene where he like shows up in corn rows
Speaker 2: and they're.
Speaker 1: Like, they're like, Chevy, what are you doing it? Oh no,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna watch it. I'm gonna watch I'll watch it.
Speaker 1: I'll report back. That's a curse on your house. All
Speaker 1: of your people will drive mediocre cars until they are
Speaker 1: running to the ground.
Speaker 2: Hey, but the newer car. It's like if you get
Speaker 2: a new car and still.
Speaker 1: Got some good ship Chevy Cavalier, any new car.
Speaker 2: You ever met a guy who has a new mid
Speaker 2: range car and he's always just like, buddy.
Speaker 1: Have I I'm a new mid range car kind of man.
Speaker 2: What do you got? I thought you were. I thought
Speaker 2: you'd be driving something saucy.
Speaker 1: No, I stay in a Honda Civic. Baby, really, Now
Speaker 1: we do we have a like a you know, a
Speaker 1: better car for that we bought. But for the Yeah, no,
Speaker 1: I'm not going to do I don't want that pressure
Speaker 1: on me. But it's not crazy. I ain't do nothing crazy.
Speaker 1: But it is like a nicer more like, you know,
Speaker 1: whatever kind of vehicle. But that said, what I prefer
Speaker 1: is I love a good ass Honda Civic.
Speaker 2: Yeah, the day to day they're they're built for major use.
Speaker 2: Come on, that's the point. They're like a fleet fleet vehicle.
Speaker 2: Fuck you all right?
Speaker 1: Yeah, bug, just flewing my goddamn I in my own home. No,
Speaker 1: shut a window, bro, No, it's fruitflies. Oh man, Yeah,
Speaker 1: you gotta you gotta nip that in the bud. You
Speaker 1: gotta stop that before it starts. It's too late. These
Speaker 1: motherfuckers run the town.
Speaker 2: Now. I think there's some kind of candle you could get.
Speaker 2: This is good podcasting.
Speaker 1: Watching a man lose his eye to a fruit fly.
Speaker 1: You being like, you gotta get a candle, man, Yeah, brother, brother,
Speaker 1: do you have fruit fly candle?
Speaker 2: Obviously someone did not spread to making black cast or.
Speaker 1: Is that your solution for every issue is making black asteroid.
Speaker 2: It's my robot.
Speaker 1: God damn, I'll be honest, I haven't tried it, so
Speaker 1: maybe I'm fucking up.
Speaker 2: Oh it's good. It did bring my beard to life though.
Speaker 2: That's for real. Okay, Yeah, that's for real.
Speaker 1: Well, I think we did it. I think we landed
Speaker 1: this plane. We both are advocating for the possibility of
Speaker 1: blackness in both Mozart and Beethoven, and it sounds like
Speaker 1: we're also plugging fruitfly candles in Jamaican black castor oil. Yeah, yeah, right,
Speaker 1: m yeah. Do you want to tell the people where
Speaker 1: they can find you on what cool shit you have
Speaker 1: going on?
Speaker 2: Yeah? I got another month left on my Aluminum Foil tour.
Speaker 2: Come to bring David to plate dot com. The dates
Speaker 2: I got Columbus, Ohio on October fifth, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, October
Speaker 2: sixth and seventh. That's two shows each night. Springfield, Missouri,
Speaker 2: October twelfth, Saint Louis, Missouri, October thirteenth and fourteenth, New
Speaker 2: York City October twenty first, Worcestern, Massachusetts, October twenty second.
Speaker 2: Kansas City, what's that? I never been there? Kansas City, Missouri,
Speaker 2: October twenty fifth. Suit Falls, South Dakota October twenty Minneapolis, Minnesota,
Speaker 2: October twenty seventh and twenty eighth. Cool Guy joke eighty
Speaker 2: seven on Instagram. Come on out, It'll be a good time.
Speaker 1: Fuck yeah. Go follow David on his endless tour, And
Speaker 1: as always, you can follow me at Langston Kerman. And
Speaker 1: if you want to see me live, I'll be at
Speaker 1: the House of Comedy in New Westminster October thirteenth and
Speaker 1: October fourteenth, and then I'll be at Dead Crow Comedy
Speaker 1: Room October twentieth and twenty first. November tenth through eleventh,
Speaker 1: I'll be at the Vermont Comedy Club, and then I
Speaker 1: will also be at Hyena's Comedy Club in Dallas, Texas,
Speaker 1: November seventeenth through the eighteenth. And if you want to
Speaker 1: send us your own drops, if you want to send
Speaker 1: us your own conspiracies, if you want to draw your
Speaker 1: own pictures of what Beethoven and Mozarts might have looked like,
Speaker 1: and you better make sure them dick's are long and
Speaker 1: them asses are fat. When come on, I don't care
Speaker 1: what they're them noses and and lips look like that.
Speaker 1: I want big old long dicks and big old fat
Speaker 1: asses on some hips. Come on, make them fit and
Speaker 1: send it all to my mama pot at gmail dot com.
Speaker 1: We would love to hear from you and follow us
Speaker 1: on YouTube. Subscribe, I think is what the young people
Speaker 1: tell you.
Speaker 2: Like and subscribe.
Speaker 1: I think like and subscribe. We want to get those
Speaker 1: numbers up, even though it means we're going to have
Speaker 1: to do something very terrible as a result of this.
Speaker 1: It's it's eerily close.
Speaker 2: I've been noticing they go up. The views go up
Speaker 2: every week to on the thing. That's unfortunate, Like each
Speaker 2: video has more views, so I'm like, God, it's just catch.
Speaker 1: The Yeah, it's starting to catch a little bit of fire,
Speaker 1: and that's unfortunate. But we will hold ourselves accountable to
Speaker 1: what we owe. And that's the whole shebang. Bye bitch
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Speaker 1: He died on the cross to take sid away. You
Speaker 1: take him high, you can't kid him low.
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