1 00:00:00,240 --> 00:00:03,640 Speaker 1: Today, I fed up by blazing some sweet greens driving 2 00:00:03,920 --> 00:00:07,440 Speaker 1: and my father almost challenged me to a round of fisticuffs. 3 00:00:08,600 --> 00:00:12,399 Speaker 2: Blages it four twenty and then raise Somehow that sounds 4 00:00:12,440 --> 00:00:15,280 Speaker 2: sounds like what's going on is blazing and raising. 5 00:00:15,080 --> 00:00:24,040 Speaker 1: Hell, he's clearly racing towards destruction. Nice obligatory. This didn't 6 00:00:24,079 --> 00:00:27,120 Speaker 1: actually happen today. This was all the way back in 7 00:00:27,200 --> 00:00:27,840 Speaker 1: tenth grade. 8 00:00:28,320 --> 00:00:30,920 Speaker 2: Whoa tenth grade? What are you doing in tenth grade? 9 00:00:31,120 --> 00:00:38,280 Speaker 1: Me? I was? I was listening to dubstep, dude, dubstep fuck, 10 00:00:38,360 --> 00:00:41,040 Speaker 1: I remember that. Yeah, drummers loved dubstep because it's so 11 00:00:41,240 --> 00:00:44,199 Speaker 1: like percussive. So like my whole friend group was like 12 00:00:44,240 --> 00:00:45,640 Speaker 1: really into I think. 13 00:00:45,680 --> 00:00:48,040 Speaker 2: I remember in like eighth grade, there was this song 14 00:00:48,120 --> 00:00:51,200 Speaker 2: gold Digger that I was really not gold gold, gold 15 00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:52,600 Speaker 2: finger gold something. 16 00:00:52,760 --> 00:00:56,480 Speaker 1: You know, I know, a gold dust, gold dust gold. 17 00:00:58,200 --> 00:00:59,760 Speaker 1: I can't get enough a mess. 18 00:01:01,160 --> 00:01:05,480 Speaker 2: Yeah, absolute class banger. Yeah, that's like the first thing 19 00:01:05,560 --> 00:01:06,080 Speaker 2: I came out. 20 00:01:06,120 --> 00:01:07,280 Speaker 1: What were you doing in tenth grade? 21 00:01:08,640 --> 00:01:11,039 Speaker 2: What was I doing in tenth grade? I was swimming 22 00:01:13,080 --> 00:01:17,160 Speaker 2: for school. It's going to an all boys jesuit school. No, 23 00:01:17,680 --> 00:01:25,120 Speaker 2: definitely not not not not nice either, Definitely not me yeah, 24 00:01:25,120 --> 00:01:27,759 Speaker 2: I don't think. I don't think too much. I think 25 00:01:27,760 --> 00:01:29,280 Speaker 2: I was still doing web comics. 26 00:01:29,640 --> 00:01:31,600 Speaker 1: Nice. Hell yeah, dude, hell yeah. 27 00:01:31,480 --> 00:01:33,520 Speaker 2: Yeah, so you know I was getting I love that. 28 00:01:33,640 --> 00:01:37,679 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, b bro, those girls are just flipping through 29 00:01:37,680 --> 00:01:38,440 Speaker 1: those things. 30 00:01:38,959 --> 00:01:44,440 Speaker 2: Oh he's so funny, such. 31 00:01:44,240 --> 00:01:49,240 Speaker 1: A great personality. Oh man, got all of it? Okay, okay. 32 00:01:49,560 --> 00:01:52,000 Speaker 1: To set the scene, I had just recently gotten my 33 00:01:52,080 --> 00:01:55,040 Speaker 1: first car. It was a ninety six Jetta, and man 34 00:01:55,440 --> 00:01:59,360 Speaker 1: was that thing rad? Oh sweet ride bro? Oh yeah. 35 00:01:59,560 --> 00:02:06,280 Speaker 1: Also I had recently started blowing the Devil's lettuce. Oh ooh, 36 00:02:06,320 --> 00:02:10,000 Speaker 1: he's a cool guy. He's a cool freaking dude. Whoa 37 00:02:10,360 --> 00:02:12,000 Speaker 1: You definitely if you have a car and you're just 38 00:02:12,080 --> 00:02:15,840 Speaker 1: freaking blazon blazing it at sixteen, you definitely think you're 39 00:02:15,880 --> 00:02:16,800 Speaker 1: like the coolest. 40 00:02:16,440 --> 00:02:18,200 Speaker 2: Thing, coolest, yeah, coolest kid on the block. 41 00:02:18,280 --> 00:02:21,720 Speaker 1: Definitely. This new found pleasure of mine was awesome. But 42 00:02:22,000 --> 00:02:24,120 Speaker 1: being so new to it, I didn't know all the 43 00:02:24,160 --> 00:02:28,440 Speaker 1: things that being a now seasoned stoner seem like common sense, 44 00:02:29,400 --> 00:02:31,920 Speaker 1: things like outside perception. 45 00:02:32,520 --> 00:02:35,520 Speaker 2: Ah yeah, yeah, you gotta know what people are thinking 46 00:02:35,560 --> 00:02:36,640 Speaker 2: of you blazing. 47 00:02:36,760 --> 00:02:36,959 Speaker 1: Yeah. 48 00:02:37,040 --> 00:02:39,359 Speaker 2: Well, now like you know, it's like legal and everything. Now, 49 00:02:39,400 --> 00:02:42,000 Speaker 2: like you still want to be cautious and just aware 50 00:02:42,040 --> 00:02:42,799 Speaker 2: of your surrounding. 51 00:02:42,880 --> 00:02:45,720 Speaker 1: You don't want to just like walk up to order something. 52 00:02:45,760 --> 00:02:47,919 Speaker 1: You're just laughing in their face and everyone's like. 53 00:02:48,120 --> 00:02:52,120 Speaker 2: That guy's high, so he's order please. This is a Wendy's. 54 00:02:53,160 --> 00:02:55,520 Speaker 1: So there I am. I'm over at my friend's house 55 00:02:55,600 --> 00:03:01,160 Speaker 1: and we're smoking a bit of gaganza in my car. Naturally, 56 00:03:01,360 --> 00:03:04,400 Speaker 1: we got the munchies and started discussing our meal plane. 57 00:03:04,480 --> 00:03:09,520 Speaker 1: That's when my dad calls me. Yo, Yo, I'm hungry. 58 00:03:09,639 --> 00:03:13,480 Speaker 1: Want to go get some cheese steaks. I'm hungry. The dad, 59 00:03:15,040 --> 00:03:16,320 Speaker 1: let's get cheesecakes. 60 00:03:16,480 --> 00:03:22,240 Speaker 2: I'm hungry cheese steaks, cheesecake orches steaks, cheese steaks, cheese steaks. 61 00:03:22,440 --> 00:03:24,760 Speaker 1: Yo, I'm hungry. Want to get some cheese steaks at 62 00:03:24,800 --> 00:03:30,720 Speaker 1: Disco stanzas my favorite cheese steak place I go. 63 00:03:31,040 --> 00:03:32,799 Speaker 2: He is like, Yo, you don't know what my favorite 64 00:03:32,880 --> 00:03:33,640 Speaker 2: cheesesteak plays is. 65 00:03:33,680 --> 00:03:37,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, this must be known information. We have to pause 66 00:03:37,200 --> 00:03:41,160 Speaker 1: here for a second. In my stoned little brain, Jesus 67 00:03:41,240 --> 00:03:44,520 Speaker 1: himself has part of the clouds and given me a 68 00:03:44,560 --> 00:03:47,760 Speaker 1: little wink as if to say, I got you, bro 69 00:03:48,560 --> 00:03:49,600 Speaker 1: enjoy yourself. 70 00:03:51,280 --> 00:03:52,240 Speaker 2: Why why? 71 00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:54,600 Speaker 1: Because they had the munchies and then. 72 00:03:56,360 --> 00:03:59,720 Speaker 2: Like, oh my god, let's just get cheese steak Stone. 73 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:02,080 Speaker 1: Like literally, the solution comes to you. You don't have 74 00:04:02,120 --> 00:04:06,119 Speaker 1: to do any work. The idea of eating my favorite 75 00:04:06,160 --> 00:04:10,600 Speaker 1: food while hi was borderline erotic. 76 00:04:11,800 --> 00:04:13,960 Speaker 2: Wow, I love like this guy's getting chubbed from a 77 00:04:14,040 --> 00:04:14,560 Speaker 2: cheese steak. 78 00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:19,120 Speaker 1: Oh dude, he's getting bricked for them cheese stars. I'd 79 00:04:19,160 --> 00:04:22,599 Speaker 1: never tried real food stone before, so this was about 80 00:04:22,640 --> 00:04:29,000 Speaker 1: to be insane. I respond, there's a bear shit in 81 00:04:29,040 --> 00:04:34,680 Speaker 1: the woods. I'll be home in ten minutes quick. In 82 00:04:34,720 --> 00:04:40,599 Speaker 1: other words, yes, I drive, I know, I know home 83 00:04:41,160 --> 00:04:44,359 Speaker 1: and park in my driveway. My dad is on the 84 00:04:44,400 --> 00:04:47,520 Speaker 1: porch waiting. He comes down and tells me to drive 85 00:04:47,880 --> 00:04:51,039 Speaker 1: and wants to see how I'm liking the new car. Okay, 86 00:04:51,360 --> 00:04:53,640 Speaker 1: not that big of a deal. I can drive super 87 00:04:53,680 --> 00:04:56,839 Speaker 1: cautious and everything will be a okay. 88 00:04:57,200 --> 00:05:00,200 Speaker 2: Dude, his dad's gonna find it out. There's no way. 89 00:05:01,480 --> 00:05:05,800 Speaker 1: The only way I can imagine what actually happened is 90 00:05:06,120 --> 00:05:08,960 Speaker 1: like a very mild version of Wolf of Wall Street. 91 00:05:09,080 --> 00:05:13,120 Speaker 2: That's immediately what I was thinking. Yeah, like that the kailudes, Yeah. 92 00:05:13,400 --> 00:05:21,039 Speaker 1: Just like like you can't just crawling out of it. 93 00:05:21,680 --> 00:05:23,640 Speaker 2: Oh my god, dude put put in the scene for 94 00:05:23,680 --> 00:05:25,120 Speaker 2: Wolf of Wall Street, yes. 95 00:05:25,720 --> 00:05:28,640 Speaker 1: Where he thought he drove the Ferrari fine, and then 96 00:05:28,680 --> 00:05:30,520 Speaker 1: it showed the real version. 97 00:05:30,440 --> 00:05:32,839 Speaker 2: The carnage, the carnage, the cage. 98 00:05:33,480 --> 00:05:36,080 Speaker 1: I must have been going twenty five the whole way, 99 00:05:36,640 --> 00:05:42,840 Speaker 1: stopping at stop signs and verbally spelling stop as I stopped. 100 00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:45,599 Speaker 2: The man's blaze out of his mind. 101 00:05:45,760 --> 00:05:50,599 Speaker 1: Apparently probably a little swervy too, crap, I don't even know. 102 00:05:51,800 --> 00:05:54,800 Speaker 1: We go to disco stanzas he looks like he's in 103 00:05:54,880 --> 00:05:56,960 Speaker 1: a bad mood now, And for the life of me, 104 00:05:57,080 --> 00:06:00,760 Speaker 1: I just can't understand how someone could be unhap at 105 00:06:00,760 --> 00:06:06,880 Speaker 1: a time like this. It's cheese steak time, baby, Come on, 106 00:06:07,880 --> 00:06:10,320 Speaker 1: get it through your thick freaking head that we're about 107 00:06:10,360 --> 00:06:11,799 Speaker 1: to eat delicious cheese steaks. 108 00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:13,200 Speaker 2: What is a cheese steak. 109 00:06:13,640 --> 00:06:15,520 Speaker 1: It's you don't know what cheese steak is. It's like 110 00:06:15,560 --> 00:06:19,680 Speaker 1: a sandwich with I believe it's like slight, like like 111 00:06:20,320 --> 00:06:23,600 Speaker 1: roast beef, or like slice. 112 00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:27,200 Speaker 2: Yes, yes, yes, yeah, like Philly cheese steak, Philly cheese Okay, okay, 113 00:06:27,240 --> 00:06:29,200 Speaker 2: see I always I always get it associated with the 114 00:06:29,240 --> 00:06:30,920 Speaker 2: Philly That's true. 115 00:06:31,040 --> 00:06:33,120 Speaker 1: It usually does have the Philly in front. So I know, 116 00:06:33,200 --> 00:06:35,880 Speaker 1: I literally choke on Philly cheese steaks all the time 117 00:06:36,040 --> 00:06:39,279 Speaker 1: because the cheese and the like meat is so like stringy. 118 00:06:39,440 --> 00:06:42,120 Speaker 1: Yeah that I just now it's like a psychosomatic and 119 00:06:42,160 --> 00:06:43,359 Speaker 1: I'll just start like gagging. 120 00:06:43,440 --> 00:06:45,440 Speaker 2: Well, the thing is, it's like when you have really 121 00:06:45,480 --> 00:06:48,520 Speaker 2: stringy cheese, it just like keeps holding on, it keeps going. 122 00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:50,080 Speaker 2: Now you have like a freaking ten. 123 00:06:50,400 --> 00:06:52,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, you're like chewing in my mouth and trying to 124 00:06:52,800 --> 00:06:56,560 Speaker 1: swallow it, and all it does is just keeps not good, 125 00:06:57,600 --> 00:06:58,520 Speaker 1: very bad gag. 126 00:06:58,320 --> 00:07:01,920 Speaker 2: Refle terrible porn star John more bank. 127 00:07:02,240 --> 00:07:03,679 Speaker 1: Yeah for robbing a bank. 128 00:07:04,040 --> 00:07:06,520 Speaker 2: I know I said, terrible porn star you would make. 129 00:07:06,400 --> 00:07:08,719 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, our only fans is not gonna be good. 130 00:07:09,120 --> 00:07:12,280 Speaker 1: I walk inside. He follows me in, and I look 131 00:07:12,320 --> 00:07:14,840 Speaker 1: back to ask what he's about to get. I know 132 00:07:15,160 --> 00:07:24,720 Speaker 1: I'm an idiot. So whether you about the girl, stone cold, 133 00:07:24,960 --> 00:07:28,200 Speaker 1: straight faced with that parental If we weren't in public, 134 00:07:28,320 --> 00:07:31,400 Speaker 1: I would f you up right now. Look in his eye. 135 00:07:31,440 --> 00:07:42,120 Speaker 1: He says, give me your keys. Damn confused, Wa, you're 136 00:07:42,240 --> 00:07:47,040 Speaker 1: high as shit, Give me your keys. When I tell you, 137 00:07:47,120 --> 00:07:50,120 Speaker 1: I have never laughed so hard in all of my life. 138 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:54,960 Speaker 1: I completely lost it so adding insult to injury right, 139 00:07:55,640 --> 00:07:58,520 Speaker 1: just can you imagine you're literally like, I'm about to 140 00:07:58,600 --> 00:08:01,080 Speaker 1: lay down the law on this one, just laughs in 141 00:08:01,200 --> 00:08:04,240 Speaker 1: your face. It was like the first time I saw 142 00:08:04,280 --> 00:08:07,960 Speaker 1: that scene in Stepbrothers when they were in the bunk beds. 143 00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:10,880 Speaker 1: In the middle of this small sandwich shop. People were 144 00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:13,760 Speaker 1: in line just trying to order their food, and I 145 00:08:13,800 --> 00:08:18,680 Speaker 1: am sobbing with laughter. It feels like an hour that 146 00:08:18,760 --> 00:08:23,080 Speaker 1: I'm laughing. But I finally pull myself together and I'm 147 00:08:23,160 --> 00:08:28,040 Speaker 1: just sitting there with that zen post hard post hard laugh, 148 00:08:28,080 --> 00:08:32,439 Speaker 1: feeling smiling ear to ear. I look at my dad again, 149 00:08:32,720 --> 00:08:36,040 Speaker 1: and we are not on the same page. 150 00:08:37,240 --> 00:08:41,440 Speaker 2: He's probably even more PiZZ Wait, what. 151 00:08:42,920 --> 00:08:49,240 Speaker 1: Give me your effing keeez? I hand him my keys, 152 00:08:50,040 --> 00:08:52,439 Speaker 1: ready to be beat up, right in the store, right 153 00:08:52,480 --> 00:08:55,680 Speaker 1: on that spot, And to my surprise, we just order 154 00:08:55,720 --> 00:09:01,160 Speaker 1: our food and sit there and eat silent. We get 155 00:09:01,240 --> 00:09:03,560 Speaker 1: back to the car, and when we get in, he 156 00:09:03,640 --> 00:09:07,920 Speaker 1: looks into my door card and he sees half a blunt, 157 00:09:08,240 --> 00:09:10,640 Speaker 1: picks it up and holds it in front of me. 158 00:09:11,559 --> 00:09:14,719 Speaker 1: You're an ef an idiot, and this is not your 159 00:09:14,760 --> 00:09:15,520 Speaker 1: car anymore. 160 00:09:17,120 --> 00:09:20,360 Speaker 2: Honestly fits The punishment fits the grind it. 161 00:09:22,160 --> 00:09:24,319 Speaker 1: I sit in silence for the rest of the ride. 162 00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:29,320 Speaker 1: We get home, I do my thing, which whatever that is, 163 00:09:29,640 --> 00:09:34,400 Speaker 1: what does that mean? Do your thing, and then go 164 00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:38,280 Speaker 1: to bed. Next morning, I come back from school and 165 00:09:38,360 --> 00:09:42,839 Speaker 1: my car isn't there. My dad literally sold it while 166 00:09:42,880 --> 00:09:43,600 Speaker 1: I was in school. 167 00:09:43,920 --> 00:09:45,760 Speaker 2: Wow, that's quick work, dude. 168 00:09:45,960 --> 00:09:50,080 Speaker 1: He's probably just like someone bucks. Just that you. I 169 00:09:50,160 --> 00:09:52,040 Speaker 1: need my son to come home and not see it 170 00:09:52,080 --> 00:09:52,679 Speaker 1: here like. 171 00:09:52,840 --> 00:09:56,719 Speaker 2: Oh my god, but honestly, like kind of deserve it. 172 00:09:56,840 --> 00:10:00,319 Speaker 1: Moral morals. Moral of a story gets stole, owned and 173 00:10:00,440 --> 00:10:04,760 Speaker 1: drive places. No, no, that's not the moral of the story.