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Speaker 1: Lute force. If it doesn't work, you're just not using enough.

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Speaker 1: You're listening to Software Radio, Special Operations, Military Nails and

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Speaker 1: straight talk with the guys in the community.

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Speaker 2: Hey, what's going on? It is rad with soft Rep Radio.

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Speaker 2: You're stoked host to bring an awesome guest to the

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Speaker 2: show today. Okay, we have a really cool guest. You

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Speaker 2: already know who it is because you clicked on the link.

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Speaker 2: But before I tell you his name, let me go

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Speaker 2: ahead and tell you about the merch store. Right. Gotta

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Speaker 2: say it for the those of you who are just

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Speaker 2: joining us for the first time. It's called soft Rep

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Speaker 2: dot Com Forward slash merch. We have branded goods of items.

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Speaker 2: We have our soft Rep logo on everything, Brandon Webb's

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Speaker 2: cool logo on shirts. You can rock that around all

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Speaker 2: around the world. We get tagged everywhere from you guys

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Speaker 2: and gals, So thank you so much for the tags.

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Speaker 2: The second thing that we have that's really passionate to

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Speaker 2: hear us here at soft Rep is going to be

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Speaker 2: our book club. So it's soft Rep dot Com Forward

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Speaker 2: slash book hyphen Club. That's book hyphen Club. Go check

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Speaker 2: it out. See if there's a cool book in there.

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Speaker 2: For you to read. Perhaps we can get our next

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Speaker 2: guest book into the book club. We'll work on that,

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Speaker 2: but first, allow me to introduce Brennan Morton to the show.

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Speaker 2: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the show.

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Speaker 3: Thank you great to be here.

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Speaker 2: The studio audience is going crazy for you right now. Okay,

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Speaker 2: I go back and relisten to these and I hear

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Speaker 2: myself clapping every time. I'm your biggest fan. You gotta

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Speaker 2: understand when we listen to this. So Brennan, Oh, do

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Speaker 2: you crack it open there? Buddy? What is that fit?

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Speaker 2: A nice fit? Aid? I got myself a nice spot tee.

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Speaker 2: Let me go ahead and read a little bit about

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Speaker 2: your book. If I may actually let me read a

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Speaker 2: little bit about you. Hold on one second, here, Where's

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Speaker 2: Where's my author? After graduating from University of New Hampshire,

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Speaker 2: Brendan Morton joined the US Marine Corps as an enlisted

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Speaker 2: where he became a sniper breacher and team leader in

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Speaker 2: the Reconnaissance Battalion. He deployed for two combat tours in

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Speaker 2: Iraq before opening a gym in northeastern Pennsylvania, where he

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Speaker 2: currently lives with Christine and their daughter Pepper Well awesome.

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Speaker 2: Bro Okay, cool. So I don't want to get into

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Speaker 2: what you're doing now. I want to kind of get

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Speaker 2: into what you're doing then, and then we'll get into

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Speaker 2: now because that's really interesting. I also read somewhere that

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Speaker 2: you got out of the military, all right, and you

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Speaker 2: were advised to go to the VA to get some therapy,

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Speaker 2: and this is how you got the book to come

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Speaker 2: out and to talk about some of these things that

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Speaker 2: are inside of you that you've been taught to keep

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Speaker 2: inside of you for you know, you've been taught like swift, silent,

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Speaker 2: deadly silent, right, So I praise to you for that,

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Speaker 2: but thank you also for sharing your stories and the

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Speaker 2: things that you had to go through that we're about

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Speaker 2: to like crack open, right, But let me let me

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Speaker 2: ask you. I'd also read that you know you're a

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Speaker 2: college educated individual, right you I think found the need

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Speaker 2: to serve after nine eleven.

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Speaker 3: Am I Well, I mean I always wanted to serve,

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Speaker 3: Like I think college was my parents kind of like

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Speaker 3: pushing me away from the military. I really it was

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Speaker 3: something I always wanted to do, and my parents convinced

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Speaker 3: me for you know, hey, just go do this and

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Speaker 3: we'll see if you still feel like the military after

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Speaker 3: and like a bolt from the Gods nine to eleven

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Speaker 3: happened while I was in college, and that pretty much

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Speaker 3: solidified it for me that as soon as I graduated,

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Speaker 3: I started the process of getting signed up and shipping

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Speaker 3: and stuff like that.

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Speaker 2: So when you enlisted in the Marine Corps, IM gonna

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Speaker 2: ask you about the uniform. Was the uniform digital like

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Speaker 2: the one that I'm wearing to, you know, give you

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Speaker 2: some suggestion.

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Speaker 3: Here's been switching over. Some guys are still there in

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Speaker 3: the old digi camel, you know, the old school guys

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Speaker 3: in certain days and we were out in the bush,

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Speaker 3: but yeah, we were all switching over to the digits

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Speaker 3: and stuff like that.

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Speaker 2: You guys were all getting over into the digit So

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Speaker 2: that was the timeframe everything was going down. And I

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Speaker 2: think like Operation in Derry Freedom was waved two thousand

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Speaker 2: and three, two thousand and four were like the first waves.

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Speaker 2: What waves did you start getting attached to?

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Speaker 3: So we were so we were after the Battle of Fallujah.

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Speaker 3: So my our pipeline takes a little bit by a time.

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Speaker 3: So I enlisted in two thousand and four, and by

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Speaker 3: the time we got over there, I believe My first

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Speaker 3: appointment was either late two thousand and five, early two

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Speaker 3: thousand and six or two thousand and six, and so

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Speaker 3: Fellusha's already happened, a lot of the cities have already happened,

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Speaker 3: and now we are holding land, which is a strange

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Speaker 3: mission set for what we did. Uh, But there was

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Speaker 3: very little else going on. So we we got over

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Speaker 3: there and a lot of the major battles have been happened,

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Speaker 3: you know. We we grabbed the land, We got everything

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Speaker 3: we wanted, and so now we were in a place

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Speaker 3: where we were just holding, which is for us, was

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Speaker 3: not where we really shine as a unit. Uh, But

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Speaker 3: we were doing the same thing that we actually at

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Speaker 3: one point had a mission set where we went up

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Speaker 3: to Tartar and there was the Rangers, there was the seals,

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Speaker 3: there was you know, saf there was Delta, and we're

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Speaker 3: all asking each other, Hey you got some missions, Hey

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Speaker 3: we got missions. Uh. So it was a weird time

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Speaker 3: to be I think in the Special Operations just because

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Speaker 3: they didn't know how to use us or where to

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Speaker 3: use us. We were just holding land, which is not

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Speaker 3: our mission set for the most part. So it was

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Speaker 3: a range time we were. We were one of the first, Uh,

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Speaker 3: we were one of the first recon units. We were

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Speaker 3: there when it actually got bad to be holding land

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Speaker 3: where they figured out how to start, you know, really

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Speaker 3: messing with us and stuff.

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Speaker 2: Like that, becoming unconventional themselves and doing things like outside

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Speaker 2: their regular stand Yeah. Just like so, so let's let's

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Speaker 2: let me step back real quick and introduce again your

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Speaker 2: marine recon reconnaissance from the second is it second Battalion,

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Speaker 2: second Italian Marine Corps, United States Marine Corps. So you

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Speaker 2: are trained in amphibious assault, you are trained in land assault,

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Speaker 2: you are trained in counter you know, terrorist probably anti

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Speaker 2: threat assault. You are trained to you know recon yep. Right,

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Speaker 2: And is it anything like Heartbreakage? Some of it?

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Speaker 3: That movie? That movie kind of stands out. It's kind

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Speaker 3: of like I hate to say, like the best and

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Speaker 3: the worst, you know, where they really make make a

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Speaker 3: movie of it. There's other good books about it, like.

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Speaker 2: The Hall of Boys is what I wanted to jump

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Speaker 2: out here about. Which is your books some of them, yes, and.

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Speaker 3: Other books about it. It was actually, uh, Tom Clancy

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Speaker 3: did a great one about force recon with a.

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Speaker 2: God.

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Speaker 3: What was that book, No Remorse or Little Remorse or

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Speaker 3: something like that. So that it I think it changed.

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Speaker 3: Talking to the older guys who had been through our gunnies,

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Speaker 3: are you know platoons started stuff like that, like how

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Speaker 3: we've changed. And I was actually just on another podcast

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Speaker 3: talking with a guy who has been updated about since

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Speaker 3: so I got out. It's completely changed again, where now

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Speaker 3: our whole unit's been attached to a different thing. Sniper's

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Speaker 3: have been brought in away from state platoons, and so

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Speaker 3: I think it's just an ever evolving thing about how

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Speaker 3: they're doing. I think now it's attached to the Infantry

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Speaker 3: training battalion, so you either go like recon or infantry,

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Speaker 3: where before it was you were all infantry and then

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Speaker 3: you came over to recon. So that was a huge change.

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Speaker 3: So I think exchanged multiple times since I've been.

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Speaker 2: In the second is second Battalion? Recon is that East

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Speaker 2: Coast or yes coast boys? Uh?

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Speaker 3: First is West Coast?

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Speaker 2: Is? Yes? Is Okinawa? All right? Right? I got a

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Speaker 2: friend that went over to Okinawa as you call it

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Speaker 2: from first yep, but total surfer looking dude, you wouldn't

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Speaker 2: think he was recom.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's how was how was one of the major differences.

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Speaker 3: I had some friends come over from the West Coast

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Speaker 3: for our schoolhouse together. And their INFIB was way different

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Speaker 3: than our infib. We're on like you know, Chesapeake, Like

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Speaker 3: we're like, we're in like these little waves that are

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Speaker 3: about this big getting zodiacs out, And he was showing

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Speaker 3: me videos of there, like trying to get out past

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Speaker 3: the surf that's just like six foot you know, at worst,

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Speaker 3: you're just like that pearls over.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: But then their land nav was open desert, you could

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Speaker 3: see your NAV point for a mile, and we were

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Speaker 3: in the mountains of Virginia just getting lost, you know,

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Speaker 3: three feet.

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Speaker 2: So is it so?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, everyone had different trading.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's legit, right, And so your theater of operation

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Speaker 2: in the Marine Corps, what would that what would that

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Speaker 2: have been? Is it? Does it just turn into wherever

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Speaker 2: the Marines need you? Like in a special Forces unit,

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Speaker 2: you've got like the nineteenth Group, they're the Theater of

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Speaker 2: the Pacific, Okay, so they operate in the Pacific area

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Speaker 2: of the of the of the World and other you

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Speaker 2: know units.

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Speaker 3: I think CON is especial in the fact that, like

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Speaker 3: this is gonna sound stupid, we don't specialize as far

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Speaker 3: as like theaters because we are in theory, we're supposed

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Speaker 3: to be attached to a bigger battalion, a MEW some

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Speaker 3: kind of bigger unit, and we're doing they're reconnaissance, so

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Speaker 3: it doesn't matter where. So we had guys riding the

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Speaker 3: MEW around the Pacific, which is and a MEW is

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Speaker 3: a marine expedition unit, right, Yeah, So they're floating around

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Speaker 3: in a ship and uh they were called off that

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Speaker 3: they were jumping on a helicopter going to all kinds

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Speaker 3: of different scenario stuff. I had friends who were down

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Speaker 3: in South America guide friends. And so we're trained with

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Speaker 3: a broad scale skill set like jack of all trades,

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Speaker 3: master of none, where we could do pretty much anything.

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Speaker 3: Just give us the task and we'll kind of spin

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Speaker 3: up really quick on that. But we don't. We don't

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Speaker 3: spend we don't have enough people to specialize. Like sure,

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Speaker 3: you know, the SF does my battalion when to Iraq,

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Speaker 3: we were one hundred and twenty shooters total for the

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Speaker 3: entire battalion, you know, and you take that over three battalions.

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Speaker 3: And then I fifth SAT of Hawaii a reserve unit. Uh,

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Speaker 3: and I think there's one in Louisiana something like that.

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Speaker 2: Uh.

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Speaker 3: So it's not a huge unit compared to SF and

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Speaker 3: stuff like that, So I think it's more of a

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Speaker 3: general skill set that we're given and then we go

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Speaker 3: from there. So our work up for Iraq was totally

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Speaker 3: different than I even in my training up to that point.

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Speaker 3: Once we started getting more specialized to where Iraq was

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Speaker 3: going to be and stuff like that.

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Speaker 2: Now in relation to the analogy, you know the Marine

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Speaker 2: Corps or the tip of the spear for combat, what

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Speaker 2: part of the tip of the spear would the recon

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Speaker 2: specific So we'd be out in front.

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Speaker 3: Of this here, so we would be you would never

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Speaker 3: see us in theory swift, islent, deadly. We would be

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Speaker 3: out in front long range reconnaissance, making sure that the

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Speaker 3: battlefield was prepped, everything's ready. We're very just in my

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Speaker 3: platoon we had six snipers for twenty guys, so every

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Speaker 3: team is running with at least one sniper. We you know,

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Speaker 3: we have eyes on targets way out in front, and

219
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Speaker 3: then we're either doing you know, call for air stuff

220
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Speaker 3: like that, prepping the battlefield, making sure everything's the where

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Speaker 3: it's supposed to be. We did a bridge rep in

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Speaker 3: Iraq where we actually made sure that a bridge could

223
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Speaker 3: be used for an operation later so that when the

224
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Speaker 3: infantry rolled over, they weren't surprised that one the bridge

225
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Speaker 3: couldn't hold. The bridge was there at all.

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Speaker 2: Right, yeah, a hundred percent. So the passageway was secure.

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Speaker 2: You were watching it, making sure that nothing was being

228
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Speaker 2: planted on it. Yep, just like overseeing that crossing that

229
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Speaker 2: phase line, that element. Holy god, that's so.

230
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Speaker 3: And then the other thing that we were used for,

231
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Speaker 3: So that's like one piece, and then the other thing

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Speaker 3: that I think started. Then we were direct action and

233
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Speaker 3: so if you were you know, a grunt unit who

234
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Speaker 3: you saw something, you needed something done, you would call

235
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Speaker 3: us and we'd spin up and we'd send a platun

236
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Speaker 3: in to do direct action missions. Uh you know CPB

237
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Speaker 3: going in getting a guy. So we were running those

238
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Speaker 3: two kind of mission sets co currently where we're doing

239
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Speaker 3: the actual recon sniper. You never saw us or we

240
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Speaker 3: were kicking in your front door direct action, you know,

241
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Speaker 3: we were. We were in there getting people out, zip ties,

242
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Speaker 3: stuff like that, taking evidence, getting the high level targets.

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Speaker 2: Damn kicking doors zip ties. You're there totally there. We're here,

244
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Speaker 2: not so silent.

245
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Speaker 3: High and we were coming in he loos sometimes or

246
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Speaker 3: like they knew we were coming, for there was only

247
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Speaker 3: a couple of roads into Iraq, and our trucks looked

248
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Speaker 3: like no other trucks in that theater. We looked like

249
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Speaker 3: a band of Gypsy's are rough. We are you know, different,

250
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Speaker 3: different style.

251
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Speaker 2: Everything on the vehicles.

252
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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, yeah. Out for long periods of time. We

253
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Speaker 3: didn't know like uh, we didn't have a base out there,

254
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Speaker 3: or like a fall. So we would leave Camfaloojah prepared

255
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Speaker 3: to be gone for weeks. So our whole we had

256
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Speaker 3: five we had five trucks for opportune Everything was piled

257
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Speaker 3: on the side like Gypsy's. Our heavy gun was actually

258
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Speaker 3: a fifty cal Sasser like sniper rifle instead of the

259
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Speaker 3: normal like you know, mod uice or something like that.

260
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Speaker 3: So we just looked different, so they know we were

261
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Speaker 3: coming most of the time, which you know, led to

262
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Speaker 3: some empty houses by the time we got there because

263
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Speaker 3: the two roads in we had to go slow. We

264
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Speaker 3: had to wait for EOD some of the time clear

265
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Speaker 3: the road.

266
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Speaker 2: In the vehicles were they right hand drivers or left

267
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Speaker 2: hand drivers of the steering wheels, so.

268
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Speaker 3: They were they were like normal cars. The cars, Yeah,

269
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Speaker 3: they were, they were normal cars. They ship them in

270
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Speaker 3: and stuff like that. It was hard enough driving because

271
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Speaker 3: the humbies are so wide, the original humpy so wide,

272
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Speaker 3: and you're on these you're on roads that are to

273
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Speaker 3: get them out of the fields, because the fields are

274
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Speaker 3: just you know, super mud, They're just they're all planted fields,

275
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Speaker 3: so they're about six to seven feet off of the

276
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Speaker 3: field on just like a plateau, and you only have

277
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Speaker 3: enough room for your vehicle to maneuver. So there was

278
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Speaker 3: times where you know, sticking heads out windows, making sure

279
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Speaker 3: both tires are on like this. The roads were looked

280
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Speaker 3: like they were designed by a child just going with

281
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Speaker 3: a crayon. Sometimes it was wild and those things are

282
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Speaker 3: so wide that, like we there was a couple of

283
00:14:25,400 --> 00:14:27,720
Speaker 3: times that we would get out and just guide each other,

284
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Speaker 3: you know, down the road, just to make sure we

285
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Speaker 3: didn't go over the side. Stuff like that.

286
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Speaker 2: So did you dive into the history of Iraq before

287
00:14:35,440 --> 00:14:37,800
Speaker 2: you were to go there, such as like the kids

288
00:14:37,920 --> 00:14:40,840
Speaker 2: of the Ottoman Empire who drew those dirty lines all

289
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:43,280
Speaker 2: over the map I sat through.

290
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Speaker 3: I was actually the intel I was the intel rep

291
00:14:45,880 --> 00:14:47,400
Speaker 3: for Michaelatoon as well, So I had to watch a

292
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Speaker 3: lot of stuff and get into the tribals and stuff

293
00:14:49,920 --> 00:14:52,360
Speaker 3: like that. I actually so for every mission set that

294
00:14:52,400 --> 00:14:56,040
Speaker 3: we did, I would go and research and I would

295
00:14:56,040 --> 00:14:58,840
Speaker 3: get all the you know, sit wet reps from all

296
00:14:58,920 --> 00:15:01,480
Speaker 3: the units in Iraq and I would compile them into

297
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Speaker 3: a report. And so every time we sat down as

298
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Speaker 3: a company I'm sorry, as a platoon, I would sit

299
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Speaker 3: and I would give like a ten minute brief on

300
00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:12,040
Speaker 3: like here's what's happening, here's you know, the new you

301
00:15:12,040 --> 00:15:15,400
Speaker 3: know what what they're doing as far as how they're attacking,

302
00:15:15,520 --> 00:15:17,800
Speaker 3: Here's what we're gonna look for, here's the high vel

303
00:15:17,960 --> 00:15:20,960
Speaker 3: targets we're looking for. And then we would go into

304
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Speaker 3: you know, mission prep like here's here's how we're gonna

305
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Speaker 3: do it. And then it was kind of like the

306
00:15:25,240 --> 00:15:29,560
Speaker 3: nights of the roundtable, where unlike i'd say, traditional units,

307
00:15:29,800 --> 00:15:33,920
Speaker 3: everyone got to say not everyone not everyone's listened to equally,

308
00:15:34,040 --> 00:15:37,040
Speaker 3: but everyone got to sit like that's just like, hey,

309
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Speaker 3: that's not a great idea. How about this idea? And

310
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Speaker 3: it was it was kicked around where our platoon sergeant

311
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Speaker 3: Bobby Rivero, who was absolutely amazing, really did listen to

312
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Speaker 3: us and would sit there and we would map out

313
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Speaker 3: together as the couple of teams how we were going

314
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Speaker 3: to do something, and then our officer, uh would make

315
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Speaker 3: sure that it was actionable, that you know, he had

316
00:15:56,440 --> 00:15:59,040
Speaker 3: permission and stuff like that. But he he let basically

317
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Speaker 3: the enlisted run the show based on a framework that

318
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Speaker 3: he thought of, Okay, this is where we have to do.

319
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Speaker 3: Now you guys take it. Now, you guys run. So

320
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Speaker 3: it's pretty egalitarian as far as the military's concern, where

321
00:16:11,520 --> 00:16:13,720
Speaker 3: we never felt like we didn't have a mission set

322
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:16,200
Speaker 3: that wasn't just you know, hey, do this go over

323
00:16:16,240 --> 00:16:18,320
Speaker 3: there and you're like, that's a stupid idea, Like, I

324
00:16:18,320 --> 00:16:19,080
Speaker 3: don't want to do that.

325
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Speaker 2: What a smart commander, right? A smart I was? I was.

326
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Speaker 3: I was so blessed between my student sergeant and my commander.

327
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Speaker 3: They were just the best pair.

328
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Speaker 2: Of course, like heid they sound understanding.

329
00:16:30,920 --> 00:16:33,480
Speaker 3: Oh, they were super understanding. We had we had a

330
00:16:33,520 --> 00:16:35,960
Speaker 3: platoon that ended up being used a lot because of that,

331
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Speaker 3: because we were hot, because we got the missions done.

332
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Speaker 3: Everything we did, like, I feel like we trained a

333
00:16:42,840 --> 00:16:44,880
Speaker 3: little harder and a little more than most of the

334
00:16:44,880 --> 00:16:47,560
Speaker 3: other platoons, even in our company and especially in battalion.

335
00:16:47,600 --> 00:16:50,880
Speaker 3: Because he was he Bobby Rivera was like forced Team

336
00:16:50,960 --> 00:16:53,160
Speaker 3: Leader of the year. At one point he was just

337
00:16:53,240 --> 00:16:57,200
Speaker 3: the super operator of super operators. Yeah right. So like

338
00:16:57,440 --> 00:17:01,120
Speaker 3: so we we hated it training because we were out

339
00:17:01,160 --> 00:17:03,520
Speaker 3: there hours after everyone had gone inside. We were doing

340
00:17:03,520 --> 00:17:05,439
Speaker 3: stuff no one else was doing. And then when we

341
00:17:05,480 --> 00:17:07,760
Speaker 3: got to Iraq, we really did appreciate it. Like we

342
00:17:07,800 --> 00:17:09,800
Speaker 3: would we would roll into a house that we had

343
00:17:09,840 --> 00:17:14,600
Speaker 3: to take over and we'd be we each Humby had sandbags.

344
00:17:14,840 --> 00:17:18,040
Speaker 3: We would bring the ballistic windshields of other Humbies that

345
00:17:18,040 --> 00:17:21,439
Speaker 3: have been destroyed, so that every corner of the house

346
00:17:21,640 --> 00:17:25,199
Speaker 3: post had six inches of ballistic glass. You were hiding behind,

347
00:17:25,760 --> 00:17:27,439
Speaker 3: you know, so were but it was just like, you know,

348
00:17:27,480 --> 00:17:30,000
Speaker 3: you never think of those things, yeah right, And so

349
00:17:30,080 --> 00:17:32,480
Speaker 3: all of a sudden, like it took six hours to

350
00:17:32,480 --> 00:17:34,600
Speaker 3: set up a house. But then we had a fortress

351
00:17:34,640 --> 00:17:37,280
Speaker 3: that we felt confident like if we get attacked, like

352
00:17:37,359 --> 00:17:39,880
Speaker 3: bring it on, rather than we would roll out into

353
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Speaker 3: some of the other units, not like we would have

354
00:17:42,440 --> 00:17:44,920
Speaker 3: to we would go with other National Guard units. We'd

355
00:17:44,920 --> 00:17:46,679
Speaker 3: have to meet up with other Marines and stuff, and

356
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Speaker 3: you're just like, man like, after doing what we did,

357
00:17:48,920 --> 00:17:50,960
Speaker 3: I don't think I would want to stay in this house,

358
00:17:51,400 --> 00:17:53,320
Speaker 3: you know, like, yeah, so he was, they were, they

359
00:17:53,359 --> 00:17:57,080
Speaker 3: were amazing. I couldn't. I actually I didn't have enough

360
00:17:57,160 --> 00:18:00,080
Speaker 3: time to go the second deployment. I was sure we

361
00:18:00,200 --> 00:18:03,600
Speaker 3: timed the way the pipeline worked. And I actually extended

362
00:18:03,640 --> 00:18:06,119
Speaker 3: six months on my contract just to go back with

363
00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:09,119
Speaker 3: Bobby Rivera because he was that good and yeah, he

364
00:18:09,200 --> 00:18:10,440
Speaker 3: was like, as a as a favorite of me, would

365
00:18:10,440 --> 00:18:12,320
Speaker 3: you would you come back? Yep, let's do that.

366
00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:16,080
Speaker 2: Yes, you found your purpose? If it was yeah.

367
00:18:15,840 --> 00:18:18,159
Speaker 3: Gone, sorry no that was that was hell on wheels

368
00:18:18,160 --> 00:18:20,359
Speaker 3: the first time. But I felt like I owed it

369
00:18:20,400 --> 00:18:22,600
Speaker 3: to him after what a great job he did with

370
00:18:22,920 --> 00:18:25,040
Speaker 3: the ship. We were handled so well.

371
00:18:25,040 --> 00:18:27,080
Speaker 2: You were like, well you got me through the last one, Bobby,

372
00:18:27,240 --> 00:18:29,600
Speaker 2: so you know there's gonna be Did did he make

373
00:18:29,640 --> 00:18:30,920
Speaker 2: it back? Is he still around? Yeah?

374
00:18:30,920 --> 00:18:33,320
Speaker 3: Oh yeah he's actually I believe. I actually text him

375
00:18:33,359 --> 00:18:35,720
Speaker 3: every once in a while. He's still I believe contracting

376
00:18:35,760 --> 00:18:39,760
Speaker 3: for the Marine Corps teaching still c QB four. Like

377
00:18:40,080 --> 00:18:42,280
Speaker 3: now I think the Raiders, Now, I think who is

378
00:18:42,320 --> 00:18:43,119
Speaker 3: the Jaysack?

379
00:18:43,480 --> 00:18:44,160
Speaker 2: Uh?

380
00:18:44,359 --> 00:18:47,400
Speaker 3: What we became in Jaysaw? And then also the force

381
00:18:47,440 --> 00:18:49,000
Speaker 3: recon that they stood up, which is.

382
00:18:49,040 --> 00:18:52,000
Speaker 2: Uh, where why would that mind go? Right? Right?

383
00:18:52,119 --> 00:18:54,280
Speaker 3: So now he's he's he has he has a really

384
00:18:54,640 --> 00:18:56,679
Speaker 3: he said, it's all the things he did always just

385
00:18:56,720 --> 00:18:59,879
Speaker 3: not deploying, which he is. I'm sure his wife loves because.

386
00:18:59,600 --> 00:19:02,760
Speaker 2: He yeah right, and having to probably salute those that

387
00:19:02,800 --> 00:19:04,280
Speaker 2: you like and those that you don't like. But you

388
00:19:04,320 --> 00:19:08,080
Speaker 2: got a salute, right, I get that. But now he's Bobby.

389
00:19:08,119 --> 00:19:09,880
Speaker 2: It's like, oh, yeah, don't worry about Bobby. He's got

390
00:19:09,880 --> 00:19:12,240
Speaker 2: this class. Don't worry about it. Thank you, Bobby, and

391
00:19:12,280 --> 00:19:15,000
Speaker 2: to all the students and to anybody that you've educated, Bro,

392
00:19:15,480 --> 00:19:17,320
Speaker 2: just you know they appreciate you. We're gonna get him

393
00:19:17,320 --> 00:19:19,600
Speaker 2: a shout out on this right now because I hear

394
00:19:19,600 --> 00:19:20,480
Speaker 2: the love out of your voice.

395
00:19:20,560 --> 00:19:26,800
Speaker 3: Yeah he actually he he he has stories, stories I

396
00:19:26,840 --> 00:19:30,119
Speaker 3: can't tell without without getting indecent. That like he was

397
00:19:30,160 --> 00:19:32,840
Speaker 3: just a fun dude. Like he wasn't just like a

398
00:19:32,880 --> 00:19:36,040
Speaker 3: great platoon surgeon. Like he wasn't the guy who yelled

399
00:19:36,040 --> 00:19:38,480
Speaker 3: at you. He was the guy who just like you

400
00:19:38,600 --> 00:19:41,920
Speaker 3: wanted to like you just wanted to do well for him,

401
00:19:42,160 --> 00:19:45,080
Speaker 3: for him, but man, he we laughed so hard with him.

402
00:19:45,160 --> 00:19:48,520
Speaker 3: Like he was just a fun guy. So like even

403
00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:50,520
Speaker 3: from the like the first is opening speech, the first

404
00:19:50,520 --> 00:19:52,639
Speaker 3: time I ever met him, he's like, he's like, I

405
00:19:52,640 --> 00:19:56,040
Speaker 3: only have one bad habit and that's swearing or no,

406
00:19:56,320 --> 00:19:58,399
Speaker 3: and that's smoking, so shut the fuck up. And like

407
00:19:58,640 --> 00:20:00,520
Speaker 3: he was just he just from the the moment you

408
00:20:00,600 --> 00:20:03,600
Speaker 3: met him, we were laughing and then he I remember

409
00:20:03,600 --> 00:20:06,240
Speaker 3: when we were trying to bzo rifles. You know, you're

410
00:20:06,280 --> 00:20:08,040
Speaker 3: they're in you know, you're in blocks and you're making

411
00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:10,680
Speaker 3: sure everything's like one hundred percent perfect reshot and he

412
00:20:10,800 --> 00:20:13,359
Speaker 3: just walks up and takes two shots key holds them

413
00:20:13,440 --> 00:20:16,120
Speaker 3: from thirty. He's like, I'm good and walks off the line.

414
00:20:16,119 --> 00:20:18,080
Speaker 3: You're like, yeah, all right, this is the guy I

415
00:20:18,080 --> 00:20:20,120
Speaker 3: want to follow. Yeah, he was just he was amazing.

416
00:20:20,160 --> 00:20:22,640
Speaker 2: He was amazing exactly. That's exactly what I'm getting out

417
00:20:22,640 --> 00:20:24,159
Speaker 2: of that. And that's awesome. And if if you ever

418
00:20:24,200 --> 00:20:26,200
Speaker 2: want to come on here, Bobby, we got a space

419
00:20:26,240 --> 00:20:29,800
Speaker 2: for you after you're done doing all what you're doing

420
00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:33,040
Speaker 2: now now with with the fun and the laugh goes,

421
00:20:33,200 --> 00:20:35,719
Speaker 2: you know, some sadness and some tears. I'm sure that

422
00:20:35,800 --> 00:20:39,560
Speaker 2: was shed. You know, you probably knew people that didn't

423
00:20:39,560 --> 00:20:42,399
Speaker 2: make it back that were close to you or.

424
00:20:42,480 --> 00:20:49,959
Speaker 3: Yeah, our our our team had like fifty casualties. Our

425
00:20:50,080 --> 00:20:53,720
Speaker 3: platune out about twenty five percent casualties we lost. We

426
00:20:53,760 --> 00:20:55,840
Speaker 3: lost a lot of guys that at first deployment when

427
00:20:55,840 --> 00:20:59,120
Speaker 3: I went over, when I was a boot, it was

428
00:20:59,760 --> 00:21:01,600
Speaker 3: it was it's like it was a different world than

429
00:21:01,600 --> 00:21:04,000
Speaker 3: when we were told when we went over. We went over,

430
00:21:04,040 --> 00:21:07,720
Speaker 3: and we took over from I think third Recon and

431
00:21:07,760 --> 00:21:10,000
Speaker 3: they're like, hey, you know, every once in a while,

432
00:21:10,119 --> 00:21:13,119
Speaker 3: some boom would go off, No big deal, nothing happened.

433
00:21:13,119 --> 00:21:15,680
Speaker 3: They were all smile and leave in high five, like great,

434
00:21:16,280 --> 00:21:19,040
Speaker 3: we got there right when they decided that they were

435
00:21:19,080 --> 00:21:22,959
Speaker 3: going to do true girul of warfare. There was a

436
00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:25,280
Speaker 3: section of about three months towards the end where we

437
00:21:25,320 --> 00:21:28,800
Speaker 3: didn't leave the wire without getting hit with a NINETYD.

438
00:21:29,080 --> 00:21:31,639
Speaker 3: Some were some were Italian, so for you know, not

439
00:21:31,720 --> 00:21:34,199
Speaker 3: that many for like six, you know, six two we

440
00:21:34,280 --> 00:21:39,120
Speaker 3: probably had six six six platoons out running ops at

441
00:21:39,119 --> 00:21:41,520
Speaker 3: one time. Someone was always getting hit with a nine D.

442
00:21:41,880 --> 00:21:44,600
Speaker 3: Now it wasn't always deadly, it was mostly just taking

443
00:21:44,640 --> 00:21:48,000
Speaker 3: tires off, taking bumpers off, you know, hitting something, but

444
00:21:48,440 --> 00:21:53,159
Speaker 3: we were getting hit consistently every day. There was a

445
00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:58,000
Speaker 3: mortar team that was operating around Fallujah that was horrible.

446
00:21:58,160 --> 00:22:00,679
Speaker 3: Like they they were very they were very good at

447
00:22:00,680 --> 00:22:01,120
Speaker 3: their job.

448
00:22:01,359 --> 00:22:02,400
Speaker 2: They've got discriminate.

449
00:22:03,240 --> 00:22:06,159
Speaker 3: They were in jail for being a mortar team. The

450
00:22:06,240 --> 00:22:10,639
Speaker 3: Iraqi judicial system let them out after a year, and

451
00:22:10,720 --> 00:22:12,879
Speaker 3: the moment they got back, we we we knew they

452
00:22:12,920 --> 00:22:15,760
Speaker 3: were back at the AO and they started they they

453
00:22:15,760 --> 00:22:19,080
Speaker 3: shelled Camphalosiah. They they, I mean they they caused a

454
00:22:19,160 --> 00:22:22,280
Speaker 3: lot of turmoil and so we were there was never

455
00:22:22,320 --> 00:22:24,840
Speaker 3: a moment when we left the wire that we weren't

456
00:22:24,920 --> 00:22:28,760
Speaker 3: ready for something. We got shot out a lot, just randomly,

457
00:22:29,080 --> 00:22:31,080
Speaker 3: you know, just like random dry buys that you just

458
00:22:31,119 --> 00:22:33,680
Speaker 3: weren't you know, expecting, and stuff like that. Sniper team

459
00:22:34,119 --> 00:22:36,760
Speaker 3: we got hit by a sniper at one point. Luckily

460
00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:39,640
Speaker 3: he wasn't a graative shot, but you know, so yeah,

461
00:22:39,680 --> 00:22:43,160
Speaker 3: it was it was that first appointment was hell on wheels, uh.

462
00:22:43,200 --> 00:22:45,080
Speaker 3: And then we came back for the second aployment and

463
00:22:45,200 --> 00:22:48,840
Speaker 3: not a shot was taken, not a bomb, nothing. So

464
00:22:48,880 --> 00:22:50,840
Speaker 3: they were just at that point waiting us out because

465
00:22:50,840 --> 00:22:53,399
Speaker 3: they knew we would leave eventually. So that but that

466
00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:56,720
Speaker 3: first appointment, no one, no one was prepared for one

467
00:22:56,720 --> 00:22:59,639
Speaker 3: our mission set, which was we get to Iraq and

468
00:22:59,680 --> 00:23:02,159
Speaker 3: where supposed to be sneaky pe you know, we're supposed

469
00:23:02,160 --> 00:23:04,119
Speaker 3: to be doing all these mission sets, and all of

470
00:23:04,119 --> 00:23:06,840
Speaker 3: a sudden they're like, oh, here's this AO that you

471
00:23:06,920 --> 00:23:09,560
Speaker 3: have to patrol like a normal unit and you have

472
00:23:09,600 --> 00:23:11,640
Speaker 3: to own it. And so we had to run opt

473
00:23:11,840 --> 00:23:15,359
Speaker 3: in this AO that we had never done before, knock

474
00:23:15,400 --> 00:23:19,520
Speaker 3: and talks, you know, just like presence patrols, the whole

475
00:23:19,760 --> 00:23:20,560
Speaker 3: I don't I don't remember it.

476
00:23:20,760 --> 00:23:23,040
Speaker 2: Just like you see me, you know, we're here, here,

477
00:23:23,040 --> 00:23:24,960
Speaker 2: we are, we're a target. Yeah, what are you gonna

478
00:23:24,960 --> 00:23:26,800
Speaker 2: do about it? And show up somewhere?

479
00:23:27,000 --> 00:23:29,960
Speaker 3: And God bless every infantry dude who does that, because

480
00:23:29,960 --> 00:23:32,320
Speaker 3: I I don't know how, because our whole training set,

481
00:23:32,359 --> 00:23:35,040
Speaker 3: I don't remember ever moving during daylight. We've moved only

482
00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:36,960
Speaker 3: in cover of night. You know, we're doing all the

483
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:39,359
Speaker 3: things where you know, you don't see us. And then

484
00:23:39,520 --> 00:23:41,400
Speaker 3: suddenly we get over to Iraq and it's like, hey,

485
00:23:41,640 --> 00:23:44,159
Speaker 3: walk down this one lane road, you know, in the

486
00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:46,280
Speaker 3: middle of the day and make sure everyone knows that

487
00:23:46,400 --> 00:23:49,520
Speaker 3: everything's gonna be okay, and you're just like, So it was.

488
00:23:50,000 --> 00:23:52,840
Speaker 3: It was hard that first, I would say, a few months,

489
00:23:52,840 --> 00:23:55,320
Speaker 3: adjusting our tactics, adjusting how we were going to run

490
00:23:55,320 --> 00:23:58,720
Speaker 3: operations and stuff, and we weren't. We weren't getting the

491
00:23:58,720 --> 00:24:00,919
Speaker 3: best of them, that's for sure. They they they really

492
00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:03,600
Speaker 3: they learned how to get us better than we could

493
00:24:03,640 --> 00:24:04,080
Speaker 3: get them.

494
00:24:05,960 --> 00:24:09,119
Speaker 2: Dude, that's wild. And so in Valhalla Boys, you know,

495
00:24:09,160 --> 00:24:12,040
Speaker 2: you've got multiple chapters that cover everything from like you

496
00:24:12,040 --> 00:24:14,240
Speaker 2: know why the book was created to the things that

497
00:24:14,280 --> 00:24:17,440
Speaker 2: you're talking about in this book, right, and what was

498
00:24:17,480 --> 00:24:19,680
Speaker 2: it like to have to just really did you write

499
00:24:19,680 --> 00:24:21,280
Speaker 2: this book? Did you have someone help ghost write it

500
00:24:21,280 --> 00:24:22,080
Speaker 2: with you? I wrote?

501
00:24:22,119 --> 00:24:24,600
Speaker 3: I wrote, So I always wanted to be a writer.

502
00:24:25,119 --> 00:24:27,200
Speaker 3: That was actually one of my my passions. Like, I

503
00:24:27,240 --> 00:24:29,239
Speaker 3: actually have another book series that has nothing to do

504
00:24:29,280 --> 00:24:31,920
Speaker 3: with the Valhalla Boys. So I have another book series

505
00:24:31,960 --> 00:24:35,600
Speaker 3: that I'm writing, We're Here. So it always wanted to

506
00:24:35,600 --> 00:24:37,359
Speaker 3: be a writer. My mom. My mom was a school

507
00:24:37,359 --> 00:24:41,560
Speaker 3: teacher with a reading specialty. My parents were voracious readers, like,

508
00:24:41,800 --> 00:24:44,440
Speaker 3: so it was something I always wanted to do. And

509
00:24:45,160 --> 00:24:47,239
Speaker 3: so I literally, like I think there's a picture in

510
00:24:47,280 --> 00:24:50,119
Speaker 3: the book where I have a notebook next to me

511
00:24:50,160 --> 00:24:52,520
Speaker 3: and it's I'm actually taking notes on everything that's happening.

512
00:24:52,840 --> 00:24:54,919
Speaker 3: Because at that point, I thought everything was just going

513
00:24:55,000 --> 00:24:57,359
Speaker 3: to be like hey, you know, you know, a normal deployment.

514
00:24:57,480 --> 00:25:01,000
Speaker 3: What's it like? And then things started going horribly wrong,

515
00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:03,240
Speaker 3: and so a lot of those notes. I actually just

516
00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:06,840
Speaker 3: found that notebook not like a month ago, and I

517
00:25:06,880 --> 00:25:08,840
Speaker 3: was going through and I actually put it down, but

518
00:25:08,960 --> 00:25:12,120
Speaker 3: so it ended up becoming this like ongoing like journal

519
00:25:12,240 --> 00:25:14,280
Speaker 3: of what it was happening, like in quick notes and

520
00:25:14,280 --> 00:25:18,560
Speaker 3: stuff like that. So when I got home, I had

521
00:25:18,600 --> 00:25:21,199
Speaker 3: no interest in ever reading that notebook again. That just

522
00:25:21,280 --> 00:25:22,920
Speaker 3: went off to the side. I actually forgot I even

523
00:25:22,920 --> 00:25:26,919
Speaker 3: had it until about a month ago, and then I

524
00:25:27,040 --> 00:25:31,480
Speaker 3: started having just bad PTSD. I was not sleeping every

525
00:25:31,520 --> 00:25:33,360
Speaker 3: three to four nights, and then on the fifth, three

526
00:25:33,440 --> 00:25:35,480
Speaker 3: or fourth night, I would just pass out, and I

527
00:25:35,600 --> 00:25:37,800
Speaker 3: was just bad, and I just I didn't know. And

528
00:25:37,840 --> 00:25:39,840
Speaker 3: it was funny because while I was in Iraq, while

529
00:25:39,840 --> 00:25:42,439
Speaker 3: I was in the teams, everything was going well. You

530
00:25:42,640 --> 00:25:44,760
Speaker 3: kind of condense it down into like a little bunker

531
00:25:44,760 --> 00:25:47,879
Speaker 3: in your head and you just compartmentalize it. And then

532
00:25:47,920 --> 00:25:51,480
Speaker 3: I got in a civilian life, and especially where me

533
00:25:51,520 --> 00:25:55,280
Speaker 3: and my wife moved to a new town, we moved

534
00:25:55,280 --> 00:25:57,760
Speaker 3: across the country to a place we'd never lived because

535
00:25:57,760 --> 00:26:00,720
Speaker 3: she got a job with Amazon, and I was unemployed

536
00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:04,119
Speaker 3: at the time, and so I'm unemployed. I got nothing

537
00:26:04,160 --> 00:26:08,200
Speaker 3: but time, and that nuclear waste inside your head, man,

538
00:26:08,280 --> 00:26:12,000
Speaker 3: it starts leaking, and I ignored it. I ignored it.

539
00:26:12,160 --> 00:26:15,000
Speaker 3: I ignored it. I'm fine. I just worked out harder, you know,

540
00:26:15,160 --> 00:26:16,879
Speaker 3: just that was all I can do all days, workout

541
00:26:16,920 --> 00:26:20,280
Speaker 3: and just and then it got so it got real bad.

542
00:26:20,560 --> 00:26:24,080
Speaker 3: I mean it got bad enough that my wife was concerned. Again,

543
00:26:24,119 --> 00:26:25,840
Speaker 3: I wasn't sleeping it a lot, and I was having

544
00:26:25,920 --> 00:26:26,920
Speaker 3: nightmares all the time.

545
00:26:27,240 --> 00:26:29,280
Speaker 2: Were you drinking at all or anything like that? Were

546
00:26:29,320 --> 00:26:30,119
Speaker 2: you hitting the bottle?

547
00:26:30,400 --> 00:26:33,040
Speaker 3: No, that that comes later, That's okay.

548
00:26:33,200 --> 00:26:33,720
Speaker 2: I just want to know.

549
00:26:35,160 --> 00:26:37,239
Speaker 3: But at that time, it was just like I had

550
00:26:37,320 --> 00:26:40,000
Speaker 3: plans to start a business. I actually I'd been planning

551
00:26:40,000 --> 00:26:43,040
Speaker 3: on starting a gym, so I had something to do

552
00:26:43,119 --> 00:26:45,600
Speaker 3: while I was writing, you know, because I wanted to

553
00:26:45,600 --> 00:26:47,720
Speaker 3: do something I loved already because I was I worked

554
00:26:47,760 --> 00:26:50,359
Speaker 3: out a lot and uh ill, yeah, right, And I

555
00:26:50,400 --> 00:26:52,680
Speaker 3: was like, I'll start a gym and then I'll write

556
00:26:52,720 --> 00:26:54,600
Speaker 3: on the side, is my side hustle and if it

557
00:26:54,600 --> 00:26:56,879
Speaker 3: ever takes off, great, If not, I still enjoy it.

558
00:26:58,119 --> 00:27:00,440
Speaker 3: And it was started to affect my business where you know,

559
00:27:00,480 --> 00:27:03,040
Speaker 3: I wasn't sleeping most days, and like it just it

560
00:27:03,119 --> 00:27:07,359
Speaker 3: just got bad. So I checked into the VA and

561
00:27:07,440 --> 00:27:10,720
Speaker 3: I started getting I saw a therapist who literally saved

562
00:27:10,720 --> 00:27:13,360
Speaker 3: my life. I will say that he saved my life

563
00:27:13,359 --> 00:27:17,000
Speaker 3: at the time where he sat me down and the

564
00:27:17,000 --> 00:27:19,560
Speaker 3: first thing words out of his mouth were, Hey, I

565
00:27:20,440 --> 00:27:22,359
Speaker 3: have no idea what you went through, Like I don't.

566
00:27:22,600 --> 00:27:25,720
Speaker 3: I could never understand what you've been through, but i'd

567
00:27:25,760 --> 00:27:29,680
Speaker 3: like to. And I can actually kind of like compare

568
00:27:29,720 --> 00:27:33,160
Speaker 3: that to when he left for a private sector job,

569
00:27:33,400 --> 00:27:36,360
Speaker 3: because the VA can't, you know, virtually can't hold guys

570
00:27:36,440 --> 00:27:38,280
Speaker 3: versus what they can make out in the private sector.

571
00:27:39,200 --> 00:27:42,600
Speaker 3: He left. I went through two more therapists, where one

572
00:27:42,640 --> 00:27:44,520
Speaker 3: in one of them and me almost got in a

573
00:27:44,520 --> 00:27:48,440
Speaker 3: fistfight within the first session because he wanted me on drugs.

574
00:27:48,480 --> 00:27:51,159
Speaker 3: He wanted, oh, yeah, just take these pills, you'll be fine.

575
00:27:51,520 --> 00:27:53,480
Speaker 3: And I'd been doing so good because I was I

576
00:27:53,520 --> 00:27:56,399
Speaker 3: was basically in two years of therapy, I would say intensely,

577
00:27:56,840 --> 00:27:59,200
Speaker 3: where for the first six months I was going once

578
00:27:59,240 --> 00:28:01,399
Speaker 3: a week. For the next six months, I was going,

579
00:28:01,560 --> 00:28:03,560
Speaker 3: you know, once every two weeks, and then I was

580
00:28:03,640 --> 00:28:05,639
Speaker 3: down to like once a month. I'd say for that

581
00:28:05,760 --> 00:28:08,800
Speaker 3: last year and it was good. And then I switched

582
00:28:08,840 --> 00:28:12,800
Speaker 3: over and I ended up leaving therapy because of how

583
00:28:12,840 --> 00:28:15,480
Speaker 3: bad one of the therapists was. And so what I

584
00:28:15,520 --> 00:28:17,640
Speaker 3: ended up doing is just seeking out therapy out in town.

585
00:28:17,920 --> 00:28:21,440
Speaker 3: So I actually got a private therapist who was awesome,

586
00:28:21,720 --> 00:28:24,600
Speaker 3: but so then it just but that first therapist, the

587
00:28:24,680 --> 00:28:26,840
Speaker 3: first thing he had me do was have it write

588
00:28:26,840 --> 00:28:29,840
Speaker 3: down all these horrible things that had happened, you know.

589
00:28:30,160 --> 00:28:32,600
Speaker 3: He had me go through. He's like, we're going to

590
00:28:32,680 --> 00:28:34,959
Speaker 3: write down all the horrible times that happened to you,

591
00:28:35,359 --> 00:28:37,760
Speaker 3: and you're gonna write him one hundred times over the

592
00:28:37,800 --> 00:28:40,600
Speaker 3: course of our therapy. And so I think one of

593
00:28:40,640 --> 00:28:42,920
Speaker 3: the chapters is called like the Night Written a hundred times,

594
00:28:42,960 --> 00:28:45,320
Speaker 3: and that's literally where it comes from. Is I have

595
00:28:45,760 --> 00:28:47,920
Speaker 3: copies of that where I would just write it, you know,

596
00:28:48,120 --> 00:28:50,000
Speaker 3: and he would make me go into more detail each

597
00:28:50,080 --> 00:28:52,840
Speaker 3: time and more detail, and as he did that, it

598
00:28:53,280 --> 00:28:55,959
Speaker 3: kind of got less and less and less and less

599
00:28:56,200 --> 00:28:58,880
Speaker 3: where I wasn't, you know, it wasn't as strong, And

600
00:28:58,880 --> 00:29:01,160
Speaker 3: so I started sleeping again and I started like functioning

601
00:29:01,240 --> 00:29:03,840
Speaker 3: like a normal human being again. And after about two

602
00:29:03,920 --> 00:29:08,000
Speaker 3: years of therapy, like I thought, I was good, no

603
00:29:08,080 --> 00:29:10,640
Speaker 3: big deal, like, we're over this. So I was going

604
00:29:10,680 --> 00:29:13,600
Speaker 3: then like once every three months, you know, checking in

605
00:29:13,760 --> 00:29:17,400
Speaker 3: stuff like that. So that's how the book got started.

606
00:29:18,240 --> 00:29:20,320
Speaker 3: Was all the bad stories. If you read the book,

607
00:29:20,400 --> 00:29:23,840
Speaker 3: all the condensed bad stories. And then I had a

608
00:29:23,880 --> 00:29:26,360
Speaker 3: friend read it who was actually a book like critic,

609
00:29:26,480 --> 00:29:29,600
Speaker 3: book reviewer, and she's like, there's got to be funnier stories.

610
00:29:29,640 --> 00:29:32,880
Speaker 3: There's got to be something else other than these, and

611
00:29:32,920 --> 00:29:35,320
Speaker 3: I was like, yeah, I have some funny stories. I think,

612
00:29:35,440 --> 00:29:38,440
Speaker 3: like I'll write those too, So I wrote those. And

613
00:29:38,480 --> 00:29:41,800
Speaker 3: then she actually is the one who got me to

614
00:29:41,920 --> 00:29:45,800
Speaker 3: submit it to a publisher because I had no plans

615
00:29:45,840 --> 00:29:48,440
Speaker 3: on really doing anything really with it. I had thought

616
00:29:48,480 --> 00:29:50,560
Speaker 3: about doing it. I'd kind of self published just to

617
00:29:50,560 --> 00:29:52,360
Speaker 3: see if it would work. And I took it down

618
00:29:52,560 --> 00:29:55,000
Speaker 3: the second the first person commented on it in a

619
00:29:55,040 --> 00:29:58,040
Speaker 3: way that like brought me back to like I was like, no, no,

620
00:29:58,200 --> 00:29:59,920
Speaker 3: you know, I don't want anyone to read this. I'm done.

621
00:30:00,160 --> 00:30:00,760
Speaker 3: We're done here.

622
00:30:01,080 --> 00:30:02,600
Speaker 2: Do you want to share the comment of what they

623
00:30:02,680 --> 00:30:04,520
Speaker 2: said that made you feel that way? Do you remember

624
00:30:04,560 --> 00:30:05,440
Speaker 2: it at all? Yeah?

625
00:30:05,520 --> 00:30:08,479
Speaker 3: They actually told me like they're like that didn't happen,

626
00:30:08,840 --> 00:30:11,040
Speaker 3: like you're like it was just one of those comments

627
00:30:11,040 --> 00:30:14,760
Speaker 3: that you're like, like, this is unbelievable. That was the moment,

628
00:30:14,840 --> 00:30:17,520
Speaker 3: and I was like, yeah, all right, there's the one

629
00:30:17,560 --> 00:30:19,480
Speaker 3: thing I will say about my book, Like there may

630
00:30:19,520 --> 00:30:21,760
Speaker 3: be some points that people might not believe some shit.

631
00:30:22,200 --> 00:30:27,080
Speaker 3: But I actually had a reunion with that team about

632
00:30:27,080 --> 00:30:29,400
Speaker 3: six months ago, and we were telling the stories and

633
00:30:29,440 --> 00:30:31,600
Speaker 3: I made sure. I was like, did that really happen?

634
00:30:31,920 --> 00:30:35,240
Speaker 3: Like there's a scene where the medic shoves his hand

635
00:30:35,360 --> 00:30:38,360
Speaker 3: down in my friend's leg, and that fucking image lives

636
00:30:38,400 --> 00:30:41,320
Speaker 3: in my head and I was like, did that happen?

637
00:30:41,560 --> 00:30:42,320
Speaker 2: Am I making that?

638
00:30:42,360 --> 00:30:45,440
Speaker 3: He's like, no, I'm still pissed about that. Like, so

639
00:30:45,520 --> 00:30:47,400
Speaker 3: there's some things because I'd written it down in my

640
00:30:47,440 --> 00:30:49,800
Speaker 3: notebook and I was like, did I make that up?

641
00:30:49,920 --> 00:30:50,040
Speaker 2: Like?

642
00:30:50,480 --> 00:30:52,640
Speaker 3: And so it was nice to actually get some confirmation

643
00:30:52,840 --> 00:30:55,400
Speaker 3: that like those things that had lived vividly in my

644
00:30:55,440 --> 00:30:59,160
Speaker 3: head were not you know, exaggeration fabrication, because I mean

645
00:30:59,400 --> 00:31:01,440
Speaker 3: the story, it's like I didn't really there was no

646
00:31:01,840 --> 00:31:05,000
Speaker 3: exaggeration needed, there was no fabrication, Like it was crazy

647
00:31:06,120 --> 00:31:08,160
Speaker 3: because my I would say my Marine Corps career was

648
00:31:08,160 --> 00:31:11,120
Speaker 3: this like high highs of just like everything you ever

649
00:31:11,200 --> 00:31:14,000
Speaker 3: imagined as a boy, you know, what the military could be,

650
00:31:14,040 --> 00:31:18,240
Speaker 3: and then just like this awful everything that you didn't

651
00:31:18,280 --> 00:31:21,120
Speaker 3: think about when you joined up. Because I think a

652
00:31:21,160 --> 00:31:25,400
Speaker 3: lot of people think, and for me especially that it's

653
00:31:25,480 --> 00:31:28,680
Speaker 3: gonna be you dying that you start getting worried about,

654
00:31:28,720 --> 00:31:30,840
Speaker 3: or that you're afraid of, or like, oh you know

655
00:31:30,920 --> 00:31:34,560
Speaker 3: what is me? Or could I kill somebody if it

656
00:31:34,600 --> 00:31:37,120
Speaker 3: when it counts, like when I'm putting in that in

657
00:31:37,160 --> 00:31:40,640
Speaker 3: that position where you know it's near him, could I

658
00:31:40,720 --> 00:31:41,080
Speaker 3: do it?

659
00:31:41,160 --> 00:31:41,720
Speaker 2: I do it?

660
00:31:41,840 --> 00:31:45,040
Speaker 3: And you find out that is not the actual problem.

661
00:31:45,640 --> 00:31:51,000
Speaker 3: The problem is watching your friends them dying, them getting up,

662
00:31:51,280 --> 00:31:54,600
Speaker 3: them becoming you know, in front of you, not you know,

663
00:31:54,720 --> 00:31:57,800
Speaker 3: like I watched two of my Oh, goosebumps. I just

664
00:31:57,840 --> 00:32:00,840
Speaker 3: watched two of my friends turn into living torches and

665
00:32:00,920 --> 00:32:05,160
Speaker 3: run around fields and they both died three weeks later,

666
00:32:05,600 --> 00:32:09,640
Speaker 3: after the most horrific three weeks where no painkiller was

667
00:32:09,680 --> 00:32:13,360
Speaker 3: touching them. And so that lives in my head full time,

668
00:32:13,440 --> 00:32:16,960
Speaker 3: like that will never leave me. We had missions where

669
00:32:17,120 --> 00:32:19,680
Speaker 3: men were killed, the enemy was killed, or you know,

670
00:32:19,760 --> 00:32:23,280
Speaker 3: like I almost died, and that never bothered me one

671
00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:26,120
Speaker 3: since at no point have I given those any thought,

672
00:32:26,800 --> 00:32:30,040
Speaker 3: But man, watching your friends and the guys you start

673
00:32:30,080 --> 00:32:33,680
Speaker 3: to love get hit. My team letter was hit. My

674
00:32:33,760 --> 00:32:35,560
Speaker 3: best friend who I was living with at the time,

675
00:32:36,040 --> 00:32:39,360
Speaker 3: he lost his leg. So like there's like you don't

676
00:32:39,360 --> 00:32:41,600
Speaker 3: think about that when you're signing up. It's always about

677
00:32:41,640 --> 00:32:44,440
Speaker 3: it's selfish you because you haven't met them yet, you

678
00:32:44,480 --> 00:32:46,840
Speaker 3: haven't fallen in love with them yet, and like you know,

679
00:32:46,880 --> 00:32:49,680
Speaker 3: you haven't become that team, because that's the one thing

680
00:32:49,680 --> 00:32:51,760
Speaker 3: I will say, Like, it was a blessing that my

681
00:32:51,840 --> 00:32:55,360
Speaker 3: team was so tight. We were amazing team. One of

682
00:32:55,360 --> 00:32:57,960
Speaker 3: my guys went on to be one of the highest

683
00:32:57,960 --> 00:33:00,560
Speaker 3: teams that you can get in the US military. That's

684
00:33:00,600 --> 00:33:02,880
Speaker 3: where the level he was at, that's where we were, Like,

685
00:33:02,920 --> 00:33:05,160
Speaker 3: we were just such a shit hot team. And so

686
00:33:05,360 --> 00:33:09,680
Speaker 3: watching those guys get hit and go home in pieces

687
00:33:10,720 --> 00:33:12,880
Speaker 3: wrecked me like that and it just like it just

688
00:33:12,960 --> 00:33:15,920
Speaker 3: made me shut down and throw some walls up that

689
00:33:16,040 --> 00:33:18,280
Speaker 3: never it didn't they didn't come down for a very

690
00:33:18,320 --> 00:33:18,840
Speaker 3: long time.

691
00:33:19,720 --> 00:33:22,840
Speaker 2: I can understand why your therapist said, you know, I

692
00:33:22,880 --> 00:33:25,160
Speaker 2: don't know what you went through, but I want to

693
00:33:25,200 --> 00:33:29,440
Speaker 2: know as best I can. And you know, because just

694
00:33:29,480 --> 00:33:31,920
Speaker 2: listening to you talk right now and you're very animated

695
00:33:31,920 --> 00:33:35,240
Speaker 2: and very eloquently spoken, and you definitely deliver everything you say,

696
00:33:35,560 --> 00:33:37,800
Speaker 2: but I can't help but kind of like you know,

697
00:33:37,920 --> 00:33:40,479
Speaker 2: your goosebump. When you said you have goosebumps, it kind

698
00:33:40,520 --> 00:33:42,240
Speaker 2: of sent chills into my eyes.

699
00:33:42,640 --> 00:33:46,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, there's there's still moments like I one of the

700
00:33:46,280 --> 00:33:48,640
Speaker 3: things like you start to learn and like therapy is

701
00:33:48,640 --> 00:33:50,960
Speaker 3: like there's certain trigger things. There's certain things you cannot watch,

702
00:33:50,960 --> 00:33:54,880
Speaker 3: you cannot listen to. If I listen to taps, I will.

703
00:33:55,400 --> 00:33:59,000
Speaker 3: I mean, man, there's certain things I cannot do now

704
00:33:59,320 --> 00:34:03,040
Speaker 3: without going instantaneous. My daughter unfortunately went to a funeral

705
00:34:03,040 --> 00:34:05,800
Speaker 3: with me for one of my my relatives. But I

706
00:34:05,880 --> 00:34:09,360
Speaker 3: wasn't at that funeral. I was at all the guys

707
00:34:09,560 --> 00:34:12,080
Speaker 3: we went to so many like and I grabbed her

708
00:34:12,120 --> 00:34:14,600
Speaker 3: and I held her in front of my chest and I,

709
00:34:14,600 --> 00:34:17,640
Speaker 3: I mean, she was a mess of just boogers and

710
00:34:18,120 --> 00:34:20,640
Speaker 3: tears and she to this day definitely will never let

711
00:34:20,680 --> 00:34:23,040
Speaker 3: me forget that. But she had never seen that side

712
00:34:23,040 --> 00:34:25,879
Speaker 3: of me ever. She has only known me as dad,

713
00:34:25,920 --> 00:34:28,400
Speaker 3: and I keep those things very separate, like sh and like.

714
00:34:28,440 --> 00:34:30,880
Speaker 3: So there's actually things that I will talk about in

715
00:34:30,920 --> 00:34:33,400
Speaker 3: the future when she's old enough to understand that it

716
00:34:33,480 --> 00:34:35,719
Speaker 3: happened to me and that I've done that right now.

717
00:34:35,719 --> 00:34:37,760
Speaker 3: I just kind of breezed over and you're like, oh, yeah, yeah,

718
00:34:37,800 --> 00:34:40,480
Speaker 3: it was bad, but that was the first time she

719
00:34:40,520 --> 00:34:44,480
Speaker 3: ever got to see like, holy shit, dad broke down completely,

720
00:34:44,840 --> 00:34:47,560
Speaker 3: like and she's never seen that before. And so it's

721
00:34:47,600 --> 00:34:49,359
Speaker 3: it's it's it's these weird things that you don't think

722
00:34:49,360 --> 00:34:52,480
Speaker 3: about coming. Or you're watching a movie and a character

723
00:34:52,560 --> 00:34:55,200
Speaker 3: you love something happens to them and I'm a mess.

724
00:34:55,320 --> 00:34:57,799
Speaker 3: I'm like, that's like the day. It's like turn it off,

725
00:34:58,320 --> 00:35:00,440
Speaker 3: go in bed, like my wife will my head for

726
00:35:00,520 --> 00:35:02,840
Speaker 3: a while, like and so it's not it's not the

727
00:35:02,840 --> 00:35:05,160
Speaker 3: things I guess you would think of that like like

728
00:35:05,239 --> 00:35:07,120
Speaker 3: sets you off or makes you think about all your

729
00:35:07,120 --> 00:35:10,120
Speaker 3: friends and stuff, but like it's just all these random

730
00:35:10,239 --> 00:35:11,000
Speaker 3: like instances.

731
00:35:11,080 --> 00:35:13,320
Speaker 2: It could be something innocent and sweet that just reminds

732
00:35:13,360 --> 00:35:15,640
Speaker 2: you of something innocent and sweet about them, which reminds

733
00:35:15,680 --> 00:35:16,920
Speaker 2: you about what they dealt with.

734
00:35:17,320 --> 00:35:20,239
Speaker 3: The little train goes and you're crying suddenly, and yeah,

735
00:35:20,320 --> 00:35:23,400
Speaker 3: you're trammoring these things that like God, you wish you

736
00:35:23,400 --> 00:35:24,839
Speaker 3: could ge out of your head. But then they're also

737
00:35:24,840 --> 00:35:26,839
Speaker 3: they're also the things that made you who you are

738
00:35:26,960 --> 00:35:29,960
Speaker 3: and you know, you know, like I because people always

739
00:35:30,000 --> 00:35:32,759
Speaker 3: ask me, they're like, given how bad it was, would

740
00:35:32,760 --> 00:35:34,759
Speaker 3: you ever go back in time and change it? And

741
00:35:34,760 --> 00:35:37,319
Speaker 3: it's like I can't say that, Like I can't like

742
00:35:37,440 --> 00:35:39,760
Speaker 3: it was bad. It was bad, but man, the guys

743
00:35:39,800 --> 00:35:42,239
Speaker 3: I met, you know where I ended up and how

744
00:35:42,280 --> 00:35:44,600
Speaker 3: how it all worked out, Like I love my life

745
00:35:44,600 --> 00:35:46,359
Speaker 3: now I have I have the best wife, I have

746
00:35:46,400 --> 00:35:49,600
Speaker 3: the best daughter, Like my life is amazing. And it's

747
00:35:49,640 --> 00:35:51,880
Speaker 3: like that if that was the price for this, like

748
00:35:51,920 --> 00:35:54,720
Speaker 3: I'll play it again, Like it just sucked at the time,

749
00:35:54,920 --> 00:35:58,840
Speaker 3: like and but even then, like like you were so

750
00:35:59,040 --> 00:36:02,160
Speaker 3: numb to it, Like we were going to funerals in

751
00:36:02,200 --> 00:36:05,759
Speaker 3: Iraq between mission sets, so it'd be like get back

752
00:36:05,800 --> 00:36:08,840
Speaker 3: from a mission shower, go to a funeral of a friend,

753
00:36:09,280 --> 00:36:11,520
Speaker 3: get back in the trucks, go back out on mission,

754
00:36:12,239 --> 00:36:14,839
Speaker 3: and you were just like, yep, this is what we're

755
00:36:14,840 --> 00:36:16,400
Speaker 3: doing now, this is like how we're.

756
00:36:16,239 --> 00:36:22,239
Speaker 2: Doing you're falling. Would have basically two farewells, one with

757
00:36:22,360 --> 00:36:26,080
Speaker 2: you guys at your camp as much dignity as you

758
00:36:26,080 --> 00:36:28,520
Speaker 2: could possibly must. Oh it was, it was. It was.

759
00:36:28,560 --> 00:36:33,080
Speaker 3: Actually they have a chapel in Campulloo like it was today.

760
00:36:33,120 --> 00:36:35,520
Speaker 3: It was like it was a pretty common occurrence, like

761
00:36:35,600 --> 00:36:38,719
Speaker 3: especially for wewhere when we were so like it was

762
00:36:38,760 --> 00:36:41,920
Speaker 3: beautiful they had. It was a beautiful ceremony, but it

763
00:36:42,040 --> 00:36:44,840
Speaker 3: was weird because you're sitting there between things that you

764
00:36:44,960 --> 00:36:47,640
Speaker 3: have to go back out, you know, in six hours

765
00:36:47,680 --> 00:36:50,359
Speaker 3: you're headed back out for another mission set, and there

766
00:36:50,400 --> 00:36:52,759
Speaker 3: you are trying to keep it all together, you know,

767
00:36:53,080 --> 00:36:55,319
Speaker 3: you know, like you know, and that's kind of like

768
00:36:55,360 --> 00:36:57,960
Speaker 3: the Valhalla Boys thing, and that's what we always told us,

769
00:36:58,040 --> 00:36:59,880
Speaker 3: you know, like, oh they're going to Valhalla. Man, they

770
00:37:00,080 --> 00:37:03,040
Speaker 3: had a good death. They died the warrior death. Yeah right,

771
00:37:03,160 --> 00:37:05,400
Speaker 3: let's go out. Let's keep go and get get at guys.

772
00:37:05,640 --> 00:37:07,279
Speaker 3: And that's you got to find a way to tell

773
00:37:07,280 --> 00:37:08,280
Speaker 3: yourself to keep going.

774
00:37:09,440 --> 00:37:11,439
Speaker 2: And so that's Vahalla Boys. That's where you got it from,

775
00:37:11,520 --> 00:37:13,840
Speaker 2: is because you know, you just wanted to attribute it

776
00:37:13,880 --> 00:37:16,720
Speaker 2: to your buddies that went out in battle.

777
00:37:17,120 --> 00:37:19,880
Speaker 3: Yeah. So actually we had so during uh So we

778
00:37:19,920 --> 00:37:24,080
Speaker 3: had different phases of recon. So I went through which

779
00:37:24,160 --> 00:37:26,040
Speaker 3: in a very cool time that I will say that

780
00:37:26,080 --> 00:37:31,520
Speaker 3: where recon did their own training. So when I made recon,

781
00:37:31,520 --> 00:37:34,160
Speaker 3: when I passed the ENDOC. I was given to the

782
00:37:34,239 --> 00:37:38,719
Speaker 3: Reconnaissance second Battalion for in house training till I went

783
00:37:38,760 --> 00:37:42,400
Speaker 3: to the schoolhouse proper. Now now I think it's like

784
00:37:42,480 --> 00:37:46,160
Speaker 3: you stay in Infantry school, which is a very formalized school.

785
00:37:46,719 --> 00:37:49,839
Speaker 3: But this is back when like there was just operators

786
00:37:49,880 --> 00:37:53,919
Speaker 3: teaching us every day. I had uh Stapstardan Johnson, who's

787
00:37:54,040 --> 00:37:58,399
Speaker 3: Cheshire in the book. Uh he he did a hell

788
00:37:58,440 --> 00:38:01,359
Speaker 3: of a job getting us per paired for the schoolhouse.

789
00:38:01,640 --> 00:38:03,879
Speaker 3: But it was completely up to them what we were

790
00:38:03,920 --> 00:38:06,440
Speaker 3: going to do. Operators teaching operators.

791
00:38:08,120 --> 00:38:10,560
Speaker 2: So it makes sense. Yeah, doesn't that make sense? Right?

792
00:38:10,800 --> 00:38:14,600
Speaker 3: It was. It was wonderful. It was its own hell

793
00:38:14,640 --> 00:38:16,920
Speaker 3: on wheels because they were trying to get some attrition

794
00:38:17,160 --> 00:38:20,440
Speaker 3: going and make sure only the good guys went. But

795
00:38:20,560 --> 00:38:25,640
Speaker 3: so it was, uh, it was its own little bubble

796
00:38:26,000 --> 00:38:29,040
Speaker 3: where we never we never got outside of that mission set.

797
00:38:29,040 --> 00:38:30,480
Speaker 3: We were always with the same guys.

798
00:38:31,280 --> 00:38:33,560
Speaker 2: It reminds me of Top Gun the scene if you've

799
00:38:33,560 --> 00:38:36,520
Speaker 2: seen Top Gun where they're talking about Maverick, like would

800
00:38:36,560 --> 00:38:38,279
Speaker 2: you fly with them? Oh?

801
00:38:38,360 --> 00:38:44,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, And it's funny because generation Kill the

802
00:38:44,880 --> 00:38:48,760
Speaker 3: book and movie or oh yeah, go show those guys.

803
00:38:49,680 --> 00:38:52,799
Speaker 3: A lot of those guys were my instructors at the schoolhouse.

804
00:38:53,200 --> 00:38:55,440
Speaker 3: Like you know, you're like, oh cool, and you get

805
00:38:55,480 --> 00:38:58,480
Speaker 3: there you're like, oh shit, oh shit, oh like this

806
00:38:58,560 --> 00:39:00,319
Speaker 3: is like this is a real deal, guys, Like this

807
00:39:00,360 --> 00:39:03,359
Speaker 3: is who we're dealing with because Ricon does a really

808
00:39:03,360 --> 00:39:06,319
Speaker 3: good job or did I don't know about now of

809
00:39:06,440 --> 00:39:10,320
Speaker 3: rolling back their best to teach or be platoon sergeants

810
00:39:10,400 --> 00:39:13,640
Speaker 3: for the next crop. And so like there was guys

811
00:39:13,640 --> 00:39:17,080
Speaker 3: at my schoolhouse that you know, they're portraying Generation Kill

812
00:39:17,160 --> 00:39:19,279
Speaker 3: as you know, and again we see both sides of him,

813
00:39:19,280 --> 00:39:22,200
Speaker 3: the laughing fun side, yes, those yes, but like I mean,

814
00:39:22,239 --> 00:39:25,560
Speaker 3: Stone Cooke killers just just the hardest men you've ever

815
00:39:25,640 --> 00:39:29,320
Speaker 3: met moving forward. And so it was it was wild

816
00:39:29,400 --> 00:39:30,520
Speaker 3: in that respect.

817
00:39:31,080 --> 00:39:33,520
Speaker 2: That's wild, you know. And I've hung out with Rudy

818
00:39:33,719 --> 00:39:36,120
Speaker 2: a few times. Who's been who is in Generation Kill?

819
00:39:36,200 --> 00:39:38,439
Speaker 2: You know? And so I mean, you know he's the guy,

820
00:39:38,680 --> 00:39:42,000
Speaker 2: he's seen it. He's running in full gear, gas masks,

821
00:39:42,200 --> 00:39:46,960
Speaker 2: ripped up muscles, you know, that's you guys. Essentially, he's

822
00:39:47,080 --> 00:39:50,400
Speaker 2: essentially saying this is what we are. Everyone's looking at

823
00:39:50,480 --> 00:39:53,120
Speaker 2: him like why is he running with a gas mask on? Like, well,

824
00:39:53,120 --> 00:39:56,359
Speaker 2: does he know that we don't know, right, and your

825
00:39:56,400 --> 00:39:58,439
Speaker 2: instructors like, we know something that you don't know. That's

826
00:39:58,440 --> 00:40:01,399
Speaker 2: why I think, and I'm gonna lose kind of go on.

827
00:40:01,400 --> 00:40:04,960
Speaker 2: My own recollection is that when nine to eleven happened

828
00:40:05,560 --> 00:40:08,080
Speaker 2: and all of a sudden we're sent to war, okay,

829
00:40:08,120 --> 00:40:10,840
Speaker 2: I rat kicks off. I believe they re enlisted some

830
00:40:10,960 --> 00:40:14,120
Speaker 2: old gunnies to come into the Marine Corps in their

831
00:40:14,160 --> 00:40:17,839
Speaker 2: sixties and seventies who had been in Vietnam War in firefights,

832
00:40:18,160 --> 00:40:19,120
Speaker 2: to give instructions.

833
00:40:19,120 --> 00:40:22,640
Speaker 3: Oh, I totally ie. Why no one can give you

834
00:40:23,920 --> 00:40:26,319
Speaker 3: and tell you what it's like if they haven't been there.

835
00:40:26,360 --> 00:40:28,280
Speaker 3: And so that's why again, like with like a gunny

836
00:40:28,360 --> 00:40:31,840
Speaker 3: riv or some of the other like all our company

837
00:40:32,200 --> 00:40:37,120
Speaker 3: platoon sergeants were all in force recon together in teams.

838
00:40:37,320 --> 00:40:39,480
Speaker 3: So this is like their team just broke up and

839
00:40:39,480 --> 00:40:42,319
Speaker 3: then became our platoon sergeants, and they would tell us

840
00:40:42,360 --> 00:40:46,120
Speaker 3: while we're in the kill house practicing all these stories

841
00:40:46,160 --> 00:40:48,440
Speaker 3: and like how it went down and what to expect,

842
00:40:48,480 --> 00:40:50,839
Speaker 3: and so like you're getting it firsthand from guys who

843
00:40:51,239 --> 00:40:56,160
Speaker 3: literally two years before, you know, are running all these offs,

844
00:40:56,360 --> 00:40:58,520
Speaker 3: and now they're just being pulled because now they're starting

845
00:40:58,560 --> 00:41:00,799
Speaker 3: to get to a rank, they feel like they need

846
00:41:00,840 --> 00:41:03,279
Speaker 3: to be teaching, which none of them liked, by.

847
00:41:03,200 --> 00:41:06,480
Speaker 2: The way, right right, like just demote me and set

848
00:41:06,560 --> 00:41:06,799
Speaker 2: me off.

849
00:41:07,120 --> 00:41:09,720
Speaker 3: I know for a fact, Gunny Riv when I first

850
00:41:09,800 --> 00:41:13,240
Speaker 3: met him, was actively trying to fuck his own career

851
00:41:13,600 --> 00:41:15,680
Speaker 3: to stay in the teams because he did not want

852
00:41:15,719 --> 00:41:18,560
Speaker 3: to be a platune sergeant and teach. He he was

853
00:41:18,680 --> 00:41:20,399
Speaker 3: shit hot in the teams and it's like you're good

854
00:41:20,440 --> 00:41:23,440
Speaker 3: at something, and you know, like you want to just

855
00:41:23,520 --> 00:41:26,359
Speaker 3: keep doing that thing. And I know it really broke

856
00:41:26,440 --> 00:41:30,440
Speaker 3: his heart to end up getting us, but he said

857
00:41:30,560 --> 00:41:34,000
Speaker 3: ups like he really made the next generation. And I

858
00:41:34,040 --> 00:41:35,759
Speaker 3: hope he's super proud of some of the guys he

859
00:41:36,360 --> 00:41:38,880
Speaker 3: you know, trained and created, because they went on to

860
00:41:38,960 --> 00:41:42,600
Speaker 3: be almost even better than him in some respects, Like

861
00:41:43,080 --> 00:41:45,640
Speaker 3: I think I call him Clark. In the book, Clark

862
00:41:45,719 --> 00:41:49,799
Speaker 3: goes on to again the highest teams in the US military,

863
00:41:50,040 --> 00:41:52,240
Speaker 3: the shit in Quantico that you know, no one's allowed

864
00:41:52,280 --> 00:41:57,160
Speaker 3: to talk about. And so he did so much coming

865
00:41:57,200 --> 00:42:00,319
Speaker 3: from those scenarios where he's telling us like a year ago,

866
00:42:00,320 --> 00:42:02,160
Speaker 3: I was in Africa and we were doing this and

867
00:42:02,239 --> 00:42:04,120
Speaker 3: like and you're just like, okay, so this is this

868
00:42:04,239 --> 00:42:06,640
Speaker 3: is possible. This is not just like a drill, you

869
00:42:06,680 --> 00:42:08,840
Speaker 3: know where I think some of the guys, the guys

870
00:42:09,760 --> 00:42:12,120
Speaker 3: some of the training, like in a school of infantry.

871
00:42:12,680 --> 00:42:14,839
Speaker 3: I know for a fact, they take the top guy

872
00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:18,520
Speaker 3: and sometimes the bottom guy, like they don't they want

873
00:42:18,560 --> 00:42:20,440
Speaker 3: you to learn from him, but they don't know where

874
00:42:20,480 --> 00:42:22,879
Speaker 3: to put this shiphead. So you get, you know, get

875
00:42:22,880 --> 00:42:26,719
Speaker 3: this uh amalgamation of the instructors, and you can tell

876
00:42:26,760 --> 00:42:29,480
Speaker 3: the ones who were amazing and like shit hot, and

877
00:42:29,480 --> 00:42:31,200
Speaker 3: then you can kind of tell the ship bags are

878
00:42:31,239 --> 00:42:33,440
Speaker 3: just there to be put somewhere because they don't want

879
00:42:33,440 --> 00:42:36,680
Speaker 3: them in the unit anymore, which would lucky because I

880
00:42:36,840 --> 00:42:38,759
Speaker 3: don't feel like we had a lot of that. Every

881
00:42:38,800 --> 00:42:41,640
Speaker 3: every guy I learned from had been there, had done

882
00:42:41,680 --> 00:42:44,200
Speaker 3: that was like like a god in their own right.

883
00:42:44,520 --> 00:42:46,600
Speaker 3: That it was amazing, Like I said, like most of

884
00:42:46,600 --> 00:42:49,080
Speaker 3: the generation killed with our schoolhouse instructors.

885
00:42:49,440 --> 00:42:50,560
Speaker 2: Uh, that's wild. It was.

886
00:42:50,640 --> 00:42:53,319
Speaker 3: It was, It was very wild. And then it was

887
00:42:53,360 --> 00:42:55,120
Speaker 3: even funnier because one of the guys I went to

888
00:42:55,160 --> 00:42:57,600
Speaker 3: the uh I went to the schoolhouse with who was

889
00:42:57,640 --> 00:43:01,640
Speaker 3: from the West coast. He ended up getting like the

890
00:43:01,680 --> 00:43:05,400
Speaker 3: officer ended up being his officer Iceman and some all

891
00:43:05,440 --> 00:43:07,520
Speaker 3: like so he got some of these guys as like

892
00:43:07,640 --> 00:43:10,399
Speaker 3: his Like you know, Cocher was one of our one

893
00:43:10,440 --> 00:43:13,359
Speaker 3: of my best friends, platoon sergeants, stuff like that where

894
00:43:13,360 --> 00:43:15,520
Speaker 3: you're just like, holy shit, man, like this is the

895
00:43:15,560 --> 00:43:17,640
Speaker 3: best teaching the best on the way down. So it

896
00:43:17,680 --> 00:43:19,719
Speaker 3: was it was wild, but it was it was so

897
00:43:20,040 --> 00:43:22,320
Speaker 3: awesome to be able to sit and listen to these stories.

898
00:43:22,920 --> 00:43:25,200
Speaker 3: One of my favorite memories is we had a master

899
00:43:25,320 --> 00:43:28,600
Speaker 3: guns who we were on a company off that was

900
00:43:28,640 --> 00:43:30,279
Speaker 3: just awful. It was training. It wasn't like we were

901
00:43:30,400 --> 00:43:31,839
Speaker 3: we weren't in an Iraq yet. We're in I think

902
00:43:32,520 --> 00:43:35,239
Speaker 3: twenty nine palms in the desert, just doing nothing. And

903
00:43:35,280 --> 00:43:37,960
Speaker 3: he sat for three hours just telling stories about like

904
00:43:37,960 --> 00:43:41,680
Speaker 3: the heyday in the seventies and eighties when he was operating,

905
00:43:41,719 --> 00:43:43,239
Speaker 3: and like he had story I mean, like he had

906
00:43:43,280 --> 00:43:46,240
Speaker 3: so many stories. But the thing, the thing that stuck

907
00:43:46,280 --> 00:43:49,359
Speaker 3: with me that I think was the funniest is he's like, oh,

908
00:43:49,360 --> 00:43:51,480
Speaker 3: all right, he finished his story. He's like, how old

909
00:43:51,480 --> 00:43:54,160
Speaker 3: do you boys think I am. You're like, oh shit,

910
00:43:54,360 --> 00:43:58,480
Speaker 3: like sixty. He's like I'm forty two. He's like get out,

911
00:43:58,480 --> 00:44:01,120
Speaker 3: well you can. I just I was like wow, like

912
00:44:01,200 --> 00:44:04,360
Speaker 3: this life like it was nut. But he listening to

913
00:44:04,400 --> 00:44:06,640
Speaker 3: those stories and hearing all that stuff like it was

914
00:44:06,840 --> 00:44:09,400
Speaker 3: it was so important. And to wrap that back into

915
00:44:09,440 --> 00:44:12,279
Speaker 3: what you asked about the book about Valhalla. Boys, we

916
00:44:12,400 --> 00:44:15,960
Speaker 3: actually had our instructor staff when I was in this

917
00:44:16,200 --> 00:44:19,319
Speaker 3: uh like this uh not the schoolhouse but the holding tank,

918
00:44:19,960 --> 00:44:23,319
Speaker 3: who would sit us down and talk about Valhalla. We

919
00:44:23,320 --> 00:44:26,280
Speaker 3: would actually talk about Ignor's mythology and the whole warrior

920
00:44:26,320 --> 00:44:28,839
Speaker 3: ethos and like, because a lot of us like didn't

921
00:44:28,880 --> 00:44:32,439
Speaker 3: come from religious households, like my parents were fucking hippies. Yeah,

922
00:44:32,960 --> 00:44:35,680
Speaker 3: sure had We had no organized religion. We had the

923
00:44:35,680 --> 00:44:37,880
Speaker 3: golden we find your own God, right, we had the

924
00:44:38,160 --> 00:44:40,080
Speaker 3: golden rule treat others as you treat them. That was

925
00:44:40,080 --> 00:44:43,120
Speaker 3: on our refrigerator. But that was it. And so you

926
00:44:43,239 --> 00:44:45,200
Speaker 3: get there and you know, you have some guys who

927
00:44:45,200 --> 00:44:47,160
Speaker 3: are very religious and they have their you know, and

928
00:44:47,200 --> 00:44:48,440
Speaker 3: so for the rest of us, it was like, what

929
00:44:48,480 --> 00:44:50,200
Speaker 3: are we going to cling to when it gets bad?

930
00:44:50,280 --> 00:44:52,160
Speaker 3: What are we going to think about when it gets bad?

931
00:44:52,480 --> 00:44:55,400
Speaker 3: And so we actually had a great instructor who really

932
00:44:55,480 --> 00:44:58,560
Speaker 3: was into that whole thing, and so he he literally

933
00:44:59,040 --> 00:45:01,759
Speaker 3: really talked us through and the whole idea of it,

934
00:45:01,920 --> 00:45:04,960
Speaker 3: and just warrior cultures. We talked about Samurai, we talked

935
00:45:05,000 --> 00:45:07,719
Speaker 3: about you know, every you know, spartans and stuff like that.

936
00:45:07,800 --> 00:45:10,200
Speaker 3: So like we got a little sampling of like other

937
00:45:10,280 --> 00:45:12,920
Speaker 3: warrior cultures of the elites and what they thought and

938
00:45:12,920 --> 00:45:15,560
Speaker 3: what they believe. And so I actually really loved and

939
00:45:15,560 --> 00:45:19,040
Speaker 3: gravitated towards the whole idea of Valhalla, especially when we

940
00:45:19,080 --> 00:45:22,360
Speaker 3: started losing guys, you know, because it was like, okay,

941
00:45:22,400 --> 00:45:25,400
Speaker 3: well they're they've gone to some place better, They've earned

942
00:45:25,440 --> 00:45:28,960
Speaker 3: their right at some place better. Because again I had

943
00:45:28,960 --> 00:45:31,760
Speaker 3: no religious teaching, so it gave me something to believe

944
00:45:31,800 --> 00:45:33,560
Speaker 3: in at the time and kind of like you know,

945
00:45:33,640 --> 00:45:37,640
Speaker 3: really rally around when things got bad that like worst

946
00:45:37,640 --> 00:45:39,840
Speaker 3: case we're going to Valhalla. Boys, Like this is you know,

947
00:45:40,080 --> 00:45:42,160
Speaker 3: we're not gonna die in our bed, but here we go.

948
00:45:43,080 --> 00:45:46,000
Speaker 2: Right, And like I know, like in the Army and

949
00:45:46,200 --> 00:45:49,880
Speaker 2: Special Forces Green Berets, one of their five requirements is

950
00:45:49,920 --> 00:45:52,920
Speaker 2: a faith. They have to have a faith, you know,

951
00:45:53,000 --> 00:45:56,160
Speaker 2: to do the job to be even given the Green Berets, Yeah, I.

952
00:45:56,080 --> 00:45:58,960
Speaker 3: Could totally I could totally see that, like because they're like,

953
00:45:59,000 --> 00:46:01,080
Speaker 3: we don't care what it is, right, just believe it.

954
00:46:01,080 --> 00:46:05,000
Speaker 2: It's gonna be right. Jedi, Yeah, Valhalla.

955
00:46:04,560 --> 00:46:07,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, something, you know, you you need that thing to

956
00:46:07,120 --> 00:46:10,640
Speaker 3: rally around. And again everyone says, oh, I don't need anything.

957
00:46:10,640 --> 00:46:14,320
Speaker 3: I don't anything, until that these bad things start happening

958
00:46:14,320 --> 00:46:16,600
Speaker 3: and all of a sudden, your friends are going. And

959
00:46:16,640 --> 00:46:19,040
Speaker 3: again it's it's never it's never about you, or i'd

960
00:46:19,080 --> 00:46:22,879
Speaker 3: like the thing, it's never about you, but it's all

961
00:46:22,920 --> 00:46:25,279
Speaker 3: the things you're watching happening around you that you're just like,

962
00:46:25,280 --> 00:46:27,880
Speaker 3: you cannot cope at the same time, and then also

963
00:46:27,960 --> 00:46:30,239
Speaker 3: go do the mission. You know, like when you watch

964
00:46:30,239 --> 00:46:32,399
Speaker 3: your friends blow up and they're like, hey, you've got

965
00:46:32,400 --> 00:46:34,520
Speaker 3: to keep going. You can't stop to help them. You've

966
00:46:34,520 --> 00:46:36,960
Speaker 3: got to keep the mission going, and you're like, okay,

967
00:46:37,320 --> 00:46:39,920
Speaker 3: here we go. And so it helps to have that

968
00:46:39,920 --> 00:46:43,400
Speaker 3: that backing of just a mantra, just something to tell yourself,

969
00:46:43,480 --> 00:46:45,880
Speaker 3: like they're going to Valhalla. Let's let's keep moving, you know,

970
00:46:46,040 --> 00:46:47,879
Speaker 3: like they're you know, they're they're going to a better You.

971
00:46:47,800 --> 00:46:49,799
Speaker 2: Were willing, you were willing to go to Valhalla for

972
00:46:49,840 --> 00:46:50,320
Speaker 2: your friends.

973
00:46:50,400 --> 00:46:52,719
Speaker 3: You were, well, yeah, there there is there is a

974
00:46:52,800 --> 00:46:55,520
Speaker 3: moment where and I think that's I think that's.

975
00:46:55,400 --> 00:46:57,200
Speaker 2: What I want to say, is like, that's there. They're

976
00:46:57,360 --> 00:47:00,080
Speaker 2: they were willing to go to Valhalla. Oh for you,

977
00:47:00,080 --> 00:47:02,480
Speaker 2: you know what I mean, and so and so just

978
00:47:02,480 --> 00:47:04,200
Speaker 2: like you were willing to do the same, like you

979
00:47:04,239 --> 00:47:06,880
Speaker 2: said earlier in our conversations. Rat, It's like, you know,

980
00:47:07,000 --> 00:47:08,840
Speaker 2: I didn't really care about if I died, if it

981
00:47:08,880 --> 00:47:11,239
Speaker 2: was me. It's like, you know, it's more about my buddies, right,

982
00:47:11,600 --> 00:47:13,960
Speaker 2: But your friends that did pass and perish, you know,

983
00:47:14,000 --> 00:47:16,360
Speaker 2: they're thinking the same thing. So they were willing to

984
00:47:16,400 --> 00:47:18,919
Speaker 2: do that, you know, to make sure you came home

985
00:47:20,040 --> 00:47:22,520
Speaker 2: right or whoever else came home. I just want to

986
00:47:22,520 --> 00:47:25,600
Speaker 2: point that out. You know, Valhalla boys, Right, That's that's

987
00:47:25,640 --> 00:47:31,960
Speaker 2: what's up, dude. So tough. It's tough. It's it's it.

988
00:47:31,960 --> 00:47:35,680
Speaker 3: Was something so but yeah it was uh So I

989
00:47:35,680 --> 00:47:38,000
Speaker 3: I tying them back to the whole book and stuff.

990
00:47:38,040 --> 00:47:41,680
Speaker 3: So I got back, Uh, I went through my more

991
00:47:41,680 --> 00:47:43,960
Speaker 3: of my pipeline. After the first employment, we went back

992
00:47:44,000 --> 00:47:46,920
Speaker 3: for a second time, and then nothing happened, which almost

993
00:47:46,960 --> 00:47:50,240
Speaker 3: was worse because we were you know, we were expect

994
00:47:50,360 --> 00:47:52,680
Speaker 3: oiled up and it was like your butthole was just

995
00:47:52,760 --> 00:47:55,839
Speaker 3: clenched for seven months and all the new guys are

996
00:47:55,880 --> 00:47:58,239
Speaker 3: clamoring like oh when an't you gonna see action? It's like,

997
00:47:58,880 --> 00:48:02,800
Speaker 3: you know, careful, careful what you wish for and U

998
00:48:03,280 --> 00:48:06,960
Speaker 3: And I guess that was the lesson for that, because uh,

999
00:48:07,080 --> 00:48:08,960
Speaker 3: I think when I was trying to join, that's what

1000
00:48:09,000 --> 00:48:12,160
Speaker 3: I wanted to find out, like could I go through this,

1001
00:48:12,280 --> 00:48:14,640
Speaker 3: could I go through these different scenarios and how would

1002
00:48:14,640 --> 00:48:17,880
Speaker 3: I react? Because even within my unit, I remember different

1003
00:48:17,880 --> 00:48:23,080
Speaker 3: guys react in different ways. Like my team like they

1004
00:48:23,080 --> 00:48:25,920
Speaker 3: were psychotic, like they were literally like they were so

1005
00:48:26,239 --> 00:48:29,720
Speaker 3: like didn't give a shit right at the enemy, throwing

1006
00:48:29,760 --> 00:48:31,719
Speaker 3: arounds down age. And then there were even some guys

1007
00:48:31,719 --> 00:48:34,160
Speaker 3: in our unit like would duck down and like you know,

1008
00:48:34,320 --> 00:48:36,439
Speaker 3: just like you get to see a lot about who

1009
00:48:36,480 --> 00:48:41,120
Speaker 3: you are at that moment. And I think most of

1010
00:48:41,120 --> 00:48:43,400
Speaker 3: my life was like questioning that, like how would I

1011
00:48:43,480 --> 00:48:46,600
Speaker 3: react when when shit starts happening and stuff like that,

1012
00:48:47,000 --> 00:48:49,719
Speaker 3: and so like and then it starts happening and you're like, okay,

1013
00:48:49,719 --> 00:48:54,000
Speaker 3: I found out, Okay, all right, I'm good And then

1014
00:48:54,200 --> 00:48:55,719
Speaker 3: you know, so that and and that's kind of like

1015
00:48:55,760 --> 00:49:00,200
Speaker 3: the catch twenty two of the military is do you

1016
00:49:00,320 --> 00:49:02,160
Speaker 3: just have to go if you have that burning question.

1017
00:49:02,200 --> 00:49:04,680
Speaker 3: There's no other place you're gonna find out those answers,

1018
00:49:05,280 --> 00:49:08,360
Speaker 3: but careful, like you might find out more than you

1019
00:49:08,400 --> 00:49:10,400
Speaker 3: wanted to know in the end, like that, you know,

1020
00:49:10,440 --> 00:49:12,080
Speaker 3: it might just not stop for a movement.

1021
00:49:12,680 --> 00:49:15,160
Speaker 2: It might not be what you think the romance is. Yeah,

1022
00:49:15,840 --> 00:49:18,800
Speaker 2: like you know there's romance. You know, everybody sees a sniper.

1023
00:49:18,840 --> 00:49:21,840
Speaker 2: It's a long rain shot. It's always like from hidden

1024
00:49:22,560 --> 00:49:26,239
Speaker 2: between the rocks. No one sees it. You're like, yeah, no, no,

1025
00:49:26,360 --> 00:49:27,800
Speaker 2: You're like, yeah.

1026
00:49:27,640 --> 00:49:29,200
Speaker 3: I mean, And that's the thing is, like what you

1027
00:49:29,200 --> 00:49:31,600
Speaker 3: think is I said, child, what you believe in child

1028
00:49:31,640 --> 00:49:33,839
Speaker 3: when you're playing war in the woods, and then the

1029
00:49:33,880 --> 00:49:38,240
Speaker 3: reality of it, Like, yeah, I remember seeing seeing saving

1030
00:49:38,320 --> 00:49:40,480
Speaker 3: Private Ryan, and I think that was the first time

1031
00:49:40,560 --> 00:49:44,239
Speaker 3: that opening scene where I was like, hmm, maybe this

1032
00:49:44,400 --> 00:49:47,440
Speaker 3: is not as glorious as I you know, I thought,

1033
00:49:47,719 --> 00:49:50,200
Speaker 3: didn't It didn't stop me from joining, because I think

1034
00:49:50,200 --> 00:49:53,040
Speaker 3: you still have to find out for yourself. But that

1035
00:49:53,160 --> 00:49:54,680
Speaker 3: was the first time I think my eyes were like

1036
00:49:54,840 --> 00:49:57,000
Speaker 3: a little more open to the possibility of how bad

1037
00:49:57,040 --> 00:49:57,680
Speaker 3: it could get.

1038
00:49:58,320 --> 00:50:01,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, that was a pretty good depiction of storming the beach,

1039
00:50:01,360 --> 00:50:03,120
Speaker 2: you know, and the helmet putting on his head, and

1040
00:50:03,200 --> 00:50:06,440
Speaker 2: the water and the red water flushing his face, you know,

1041
00:50:06,480 --> 00:50:10,440
Speaker 2: with blood from his troops that he you know, and

1042
00:50:11,680 --> 00:50:14,080
Speaker 2: Alpha one say again the beach is not clear over

1043
00:50:14,160 --> 00:50:17,640
Speaker 2: bring up the Bengalores bro It's like, dang, dude, what

1044
00:50:17,800 --> 00:50:23,040
Speaker 2: a crazy uh life you've been through as a reconnaissance sniper.

1045
00:50:23,239 --> 00:50:27,680
Speaker 2: Right is your logo the spade? No, that's first recon

1046
00:50:27,800 --> 00:50:29,560
Speaker 2: right is you guys? Are you guys all the spade?

1047
00:50:30,040 --> 00:50:33,200
Speaker 2: The recon teams? Like, there's a spade painted on the

1048
00:50:33,239 --> 00:50:34,680
Speaker 2: building Pendleton.

1049
00:50:34,960 --> 00:50:37,920
Speaker 3: Uh so we we just had the skull with the

1050
00:50:37,960 --> 00:50:39,760
Speaker 3: three holes in it that was ours.

1051
00:50:40,040 --> 00:50:41,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's dead ye.

1052
00:50:41,680 --> 00:50:43,600
Speaker 3: So I mean, like so that's kind of the common

1053
00:50:43,640 --> 00:50:47,160
Speaker 3: one of all of them. I actually have some cool

1054
00:50:47,600 --> 00:50:51,600
Speaker 3: photos I found of like reconjuring Vietnam with the skull

1055
00:50:51,640 --> 00:50:55,239
Speaker 3: with the three holes. It's like the old stuff. So

1056
00:50:55,400 --> 00:50:58,240
Speaker 3: it hasn't changed a lot from that. I think everyone

1057
00:50:58,239 --> 00:51:02,839
Speaker 3: has specifically for their Italian there is specific ones, but

1058
00:51:02,880 --> 00:51:04,560
Speaker 3: for the most part, it's just the skull with the

1059
00:51:04,560 --> 00:51:05,719
Speaker 3: three the three holes in.

1060
00:51:05,680 --> 00:51:09,680
Speaker 2: It, which signifies swift, deadly, and silent, I see.

1061
00:51:09,760 --> 00:51:12,320
Speaker 3: And then there's usually the paddle, like so most guys

1062
00:51:12,320 --> 00:51:14,040
Speaker 3: have a jack somewhere on them. So I have a

1063
00:51:14,120 --> 00:51:17,560
Speaker 3: jack right here that I made myself depending on what

1064
00:51:17,680 --> 00:51:19,640
Speaker 3: I got. So it has a little like you know,

1065
00:51:19,760 --> 00:51:23,160
Speaker 3: sniper scope and has my breecher stuff. I got wings,

1066
00:51:23,200 --> 00:51:25,160
Speaker 3: I got a paddle, but I did not get my

1067
00:51:25,239 --> 00:51:27,960
Speaker 3: dive bubble, so I don't have like the dive thing.

1068
00:51:28,360 --> 00:51:31,840
Speaker 2: So yeah, that's the that's the helmet with the snorkels

1069
00:51:31,840 --> 00:51:35,759
Speaker 2: going around both sides of its mouth. Yeah, the Rebreather Sniper.

1070
00:51:35,520 --> 00:51:39,360
Speaker 3: School instead of that. That was my choice given the

1071
00:51:39,400 --> 00:51:40,319
Speaker 3: time frame I could go.

1072
00:51:40,480 --> 00:51:44,080
Speaker 2: Was Oh, you guys, I never want to do You

1073
00:51:44,160 --> 00:51:46,680
Speaker 2: never got that either. Yeah, he never got that. He's like,

1074
00:51:46,719 --> 00:51:49,080
Speaker 2: I'm a Green Beret, but I'm not a combat diving

1075
00:51:49,120 --> 00:51:53,480
Speaker 2: green beer. Like there's better Green Berets than Green Berets,

1076
00:51:53,520 --> 00:51:55,520
Speaker 2: you know. As a young man, he always wanted that

1077
00:51:55,560 --> 00:51:57,479
Speaker 2: dive badge though, but he loved to dive.

1078
00:51:58,000 --> 00:52:00,920
Speaker 3: No I had. I had aster guns who had the

1079
00:52:01,000 --> 00:52:04,520
Speaker 3: Ranger tab and uh, I was like doing that. So

1080
00:52:04,560 --> 00:52:07,440
Speaker 3: I signed up for Ranger School and I was supposed

1081
00:52:07,480 --> 00:52:10,040
Speaker 3: to hit. I was supposed to jump. It was supposed

1082
00:52:10,040 --> 00:52:13,040
Speaker 3: to go jump Ranger Sniper. But they ended up canking

1083
00:52:13,040 --> 00:52:15,480
Speaker 3: my Ranger slot right at the like, so we We

1084
00:52:15,520 --> 00:52:17,160
Speaker 3: had the option as a recon to go to any

1085
00:52:17,160 --> 00:52:19,720
Speaker 3: school we wanted to, so long as we could justify

1086
00:52:19,719 --> 00:52:21,600
Speaker 3: it in some way of like I'll take a ranger

1087
00:52:22,920 --> 00:52:24,759
Speaker 3: Like I heard that's really hard, let's do that.

1088
00:52:24,880 --> 00:52:25,840
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1089
00:52:26,239 --> 00:52:29,520
Speaker 3: But we ended up in a conversation and from what

1090
00:52:29,600 --> 00:52:32,520
Speaker 3: I understand, he's like, there is no harder gut chuck

1091
00:52:32,680 --> 00:52:34,759
Speaker 3: than Ranger school. He's like, you want to find out

1092
00:52:34,800 --> 00:52:37,279
Speaker 3: about yourself. He's like, that is you at your lowest.

1093
00:52:37,480 --> 00:52:39,360
Speaker 3: It's not the hardest in the you know, you're not

1094
00:52:39,360 --> 00:52:41,040
Speaker 3: gonna swim, you're not gonna do anything. He's like, but

1095
00:52:41,120 --> 00:52:44,400
Speaker 3: you want to see the toughest, most low you can get,

1096
00:52:44,719 --> 00:52:46,719
Speaker 3: there's that school for you. He's like, it is just

1097
00:52:46,760 --> 00:52:48,439
Speaker 3: a suck fest. And I was like, all right, sign

1098
00:52:48,440 --> 00:52:49,279
Speaker 3: me up. Let's go.

1099
00:52:49,520 --> 00:52:52,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, let's see I'll prove prove that to me either,

1100
00:52:52,120 --> 00:52:53,279
Speaker 2: like let me go find that out.

1101
00:52:53,480 --> 00:52:55,359
Speaker 3: What I think it's funny you should say that because

1102
00:52:55,360 --> 00:52:56,840
Speaker 3: I think one of the things, because like it was,

1103
00:52:56,920 --> 00:52:59,440
Speaker 3: my my unit was wild as far as like I

1104
00:52:59,480 --> 00:53:02,560
Speaker 3: had more college graduates in my unit who are in

1105
00:53:02,560 --> 00:53:06,360
Speaker 3: an enlisted unit that I could possibly imagine. For that reason,

1106
00:53:06,400 --> 00:53:08,400
Speaker 3: which is if you go to college and you. I

1107
00:53:08,440 --> 00:53:11,920
Speaker 3: actually tried to sign up for the officer program right

1108
00:53:11,960 --> 00:53:13,680
Speaker 3: when I got out of college, and they're like, oh,

1109
00:53:13,719 --> 00:53:15,719
Speaker 3: it's gonna be a year wait, and I was like, oh, yeah,

1110
00:53:15,880 --> 00:53:17,520
Speaker 3: I'm gonna go on a list. Then he's like, are

1111
00:53:17,520 --> 00:53:19,719
Speaker 3: you kidding me? I no, No, I'm not waiting, And

1112
00:53:19,800 --> 00:53:22,879
Speaker 3: that was super common, and it was that whole yeah right,

1113
00:53:22,960 --> 00:53:25,400
Speaker 3: and it was like, well, we're all gonna go see

1114
00:53:25,520 --> 00:53:27,799
Speaker 3: what the next step is. So when I signed up,

1115
00:53:27,840 --> 00:53:30,239
Speaker 3: I never was expecting to be recon. That was not

1116
00:53:30,320 --> 00:53:32,840
Speaker 3: my plan. I didn't even know recon existed. To be honest,

1117
00:53:33,239 --> 00:53:36,600
Speaker 3: I was going, oh, three eleven infantry, straight up infantry. Yeah,

1118
00:53:36,680 --> 00:53:39,040
Speaker 3: let's do it, because that's how I imagined all marines

1119
00:53:39,280 --> 00:53:43,319
Speaker 3: storm the beach infantry. Uh. And so when I sign

1120
00:53:43,440 --> 00:53:46,879
Speaker 3: up at the station, he's like, oh, you don't want

1121
00:53:46,880 --> 00:53:49,239
Speaker 3: to do that, like we have plenty of infantry. Do this.

1122
00:53:49,600 --> 00:53:51,600
Speaker 3: You know you're a smart kid, you have college, Like

1123
00:53:51,840 --> 00:53:53,640
Speaker 3: do this. And I was like, I'm going, oh, three

1124
00:53:53,719 --> 00:53:56,040
Speaker 3: eleven or I'm not going, like that's how it's going

1125
00:53:56,120 --> 00:53:59,440
Speaker 3: to be and heed a nice scent. And then while

1126
00:53:59,480 --> 00:54:02,560
Speaker 3: I was at infantry school is where I first heard

1127
00:54:02,560 --> 00:54:05,000
Speaker 3: about recon and got our first speech about it and

1128
00:54:05,000 --> 00:54:06,960
Speaker 3: stuff like that, which was amazing. It was probably my

1129
00:54:07,000 --> 00:54:07,799
Speaker 3: favorite speech ever.

1130
00:54:08,920 --> 00:54:10,799
Speaker 2: So and then like you're a cardio guy, then you

1131
00:54:10,800 --> 00:54:12,239
Speaker 2: can run. Then you got to be a runner to

1132
00:54:12,239 --> 00:54:14,239
Speaker 2: be recon right, you gotta run, you gotta be able

1133
00:54:14,239 --> 00:54:15,440
Speaker 2: to us too, right.

1134
00:54:15,520 --> 00:54:18,360
Speaker 3: Yes, I wasn't at the time. I was more of

1135
00:54:18,360 --> 00:54:22,120
Speaker 3: a bodybuilder. And then real fast you learn I was

1136
00:54:22,160 --> 00:54:24,560
Speaker 3: never the fastest runner, Like we had kids running like

1137
00:54:24,600 --> 00:54:28,800
Speaker 3: sixteen thirty three miles like crazy shit. I was a

1138
00:54:28,840 --> 00:54:32,879
Speaker 3: little heavier set going in than I think I would

1139
00:54:32,920 --> 00:54:34,919
Speaker 3: ever be, Like I was probably almost two hundred pounds

1140
00:54:34,960 --> 00:54:36,719
Speaker 3: going in. Of like, I was pretty muscular. I was

1141
00:54:36,760 --> 00:54:39,359
Speaker 3: a bodybuilder in college and I really kind of weightlifted.

1142
00:54:39,880 --> 00:54:41,360
Speaker 3: And then when I got out of boot camp, I

1143
00:54:41,400 --> 00:54:44,200
Speaker 3: was one fifty five of Joe. It looked like the

1144
00:54:44,280 --> 00:54:48,000
Speaker 3: vulture from the old Bugs Bunny cartoons, just like Adam's Apple.

1145
00:54:48,040 --> 00:54:53,200
Speaker 3: And that was about it. And so we we we

1146
00:54:53,280 --> 00:54:55,440
Speaker 3: learned real quick. I remember the first day that I

1147
00:54:55,440 --> 00:54:57,400
Speaker 3: got it, because like you go through infantry school in

1148
00:54:57,440 --> 00:54:59,560
Speaker 3: boot camp and it's not a whole lot of running.

1149
00:54:59,760 --> 00:55:02,799
Speaker 3: You you could run shitty and still make it. The

1150
00:55:02,840 --> 00:55:06,960
Speaker 3: first day of recon the not school house. But the

1151
00:55:07,000 --> 00:55:10,560
Speaker 3: holding tank. I just remember staff Sergeant Johnston got down

1152
00:55:10,640 --> 00:55:12,520
Speaker 3: there and he took us for a six mile fucking

1153
00:55:12,640 --> 00:55:15,880
Speaker 3: run that almost all of us didn't make like it

1154
00:55:15,960 --> 00:55:17,799
Speaker 3: was it was incredible, and it was like, this is

1155
00:55:17,800 --> 00:55:20,399
Speaker 3: gonna be every day for the rest of your holding tank.

1156
00:55:20,840 --> 00:55:22,520
Speaker 3: We are going to do shit like this every day,

1157
00:55:22,560 --> 00:55:25,400
Speaker 3: and so really fast you learn you don't want muscle,

1158
00:55:25,600 --> 00:55:28,239
Speaker 3: you don't want extra weight, You're gonna stay. So I

1159
00:55:28,320 --> 00:55:31,120
Speaker 3: stayed at about a buck seventy five, so like down

1160
00:55:31,120 --> 00:55:33,879
Speaker 3: from like two oh five, I've stayed about one hundred

1161
00:55:33,880 --> 00:55:37,239
Speaker 3: and seventy five pounds my entire recon career. I could

1162
00:55:37,239 --> 00:55:39,640
Speaker 3: do the twenty pull ups no problem, Like like we

1163
00:55:39,640 --> 00:55:41,920
Speaker 3: were doing twenty five and thirty in Iraq, no problem.

1164
00:55:41,920 --> 00:55:44,799
Speaker 3: We were practicing like we could do. Yeah, we were

1165
00:55:45,040 --> 00:55:50,560
Speaker 3: built for long range. At my best, I was carrying

1166
00:55:51,120 --> 00:55:53,760
Speaker 3: one hundred and eighty five pounds a year on most

1167
00:55:53,800 --> 00:55:56,560
Speaker 3: mission sets. My second time out because I had the

1168
00:55:57,400 --> 00:56:00,760
Speaker 3: threet cal Sassar, which is in itself about thirty pounds,

1169
00:56:00,920 --> 00:56:04,719
Speaker 3: and then every mag is another ten pounds, right, and

1170
00:56:04,760 --> 00:56:06,799
Speaker 3: so loaded the pictures of the book like you can

1171
00:56:06,840 --> 00:56:08,920
Speaker 3: see like it's sticking up. I had to buy a

1172
00:56:08,960 --> 00:56:11,680
Speaker 3: special rock for it. So the rock actually came to

1173
00:56:11,680 --> 00:56:14,359
Speaker 3: about my ear height. And then you just see these

1174
00:56:14,360 --> 00:56:16,799
Speaker 3: two things go further because it was broken down into

1175
00:56:16,800 --> 00:56:19,920
Speaker 3: two pieces. So but with my rock and then my

1176
00:56:20,120 --> 00:56:24,480
Speaker 3: I had a underslung forty mic mic grenade launcher on

1177
00:56:24,520 --> 00:56:28,400
Speaker 3: my M four and then all those red flares, you know,

1178
00:56:28,440 --> 00:56:31,120
Speaker 3: forty mic mic. So we weighed all my shit at

1179
00:56:31,120 --> 00:56:32,719
Speaker 3: one point and I was humping out one hundred and

1180
00:56:32,760 --> 00:56:35,600
Speaker 3: eighty five pounds, you know, across the desert.

1181
00:56:36,480 --> 00:56:39,400
Speaker 2: Another one of you, yes, right, and.

1182
00:56:38,960 --> 00:56:40,360
Speaker 3: And so that's what you realize you have to be

1183
00:56:40,440 --> 00:56:43,520
Speaker 3: good at is not. We had guys who were, you know,

1184
00:56:43,520 --> 00:56:45,719
Speaker 3: big and muscular of course, but like for the most part,

1185
00:56:45,719 --> 00:56:48,279
Speaker 3: if you like rudy and like, like, they're muscular, but

1186
00:56:48,320 --> 00:56:53,799
Speaker 3: they're like shredded like just like they they they're lean, right,

1187
00:56:53,880 --> 00:56:55,640
Speaker 3: You're just lean and you're trying to go as far

1188
00:56:55,719 --> 00:56:58,360
Speaker 3: as you can. Uh So, when I got out, actually

1189
00:56:58,560 --> 00:56:59,960
Speaker 3: what I foundt I was good at. And I had

1190
00:57:00,120 --> 00:57:03,400
Speaker 3: never liked running whatsoever. As I started doing endurance stuff

1191
00:57:03,440 --> 00:57:07,200
Speaker 3: like exterra racing, triathlons, marathons, I did an iron Man

1192
00:57:07,320 --> 00:57:10,200
Speaker 3: on a dare, and I was good at it because

1193
00:57:10,200 --> 00:57:10,600
Speaker 3: that's all.

1194
00:57:10,520 --> 00:57:11,920
Speaker 2: Of course you did, and of course you were.

1195
00:57:13,400 --> 00:57:15,640
Speaker 3: It went horribly wrong on the bike because I had

1196
00:57:15,680 --> 00:57:18,880
Speaker 3: never bid, but like, but that's what we were good

1197
00:57:18,960 --> 00:57:21,200
Speaker 3: at is you take someone and you're just like, hey,

1198
00:57:21,240 --> 00:57:23,720
Speaker 3: go that way for as long as you can. Okay.

1199
00:57:24,120 --> 00:57:26,080
Speaker 3: Like I remember like a lot of the fun stuff

1200
00:57:26,120 --> 00:57:29,000
Speaker 3: in the schoolhouse that I enjoyed that like was we

1201
00:57:29,040 --> 00:57:31,520
Speaker 3: did these like you know, fifty pounds rock runs where

1202
00:57:31,680 --> 00:57:34,200
Speaker 3: they would just take off through sand dunes and you know,

1203
00:57:34,240 --> 00:57:35,720
Speaker 3: through the woods and stuff at the three in the

1204
00:57:35,720 --> 00:57:39,240
Speaker 3: morning and it was really like and you were alone

1205
00:57:39,360 --> 00:57:41,880
Speaker 3: within five minutes. You couldn't see another person. We were

1206
00:57:41,920 --> 00:57:44,520
Speaker 3: strung out that bad with a rabbit way ahead of

1207
00:57:44,600 --> 00:57:46,640
Speaker 3: us with just a chem light on their back, and

1208
00:57:46,920 --> 00:57:49,120
Speaker 3: it was just you versus you, you know, going as

1209
00:57:49,160 --> 00:57:50,000
Speaker 3: long as you could.

1210
00:57:50,520 --> 00:57:50,720
Speaker 2: Uh.

1211
00:57:50,760 --> 00:57:54,320
Speaker 3: And that's what you found is it was all about consistency,

1212
00:57:54,640 --> 00:57:57,880
Speaker 3: just being able to put out ninety percent efforts endlessly.

1213
00:57:58,440 --> 00:58:00,440
Speaker 3: You know. It was very rarely did the guy never

1214
00:58:00,480 --> 00:58:03,200
Speaker 3: need to be super strong, but man, you needed to

1215
00:58:03,280 --> 00:58:05,880
Speaker 3: be gone. It almost like have you ever get to

1216
00:58:05,880 --> 00:58:07,800
Speaker 3: shoot a donkey? Yeah, if you ever got to be

1217
00:58:07,800 --> 00:58:09,920
Speaker 3: a donkey, you just got to keep going. I remember

1218
00:58:09,960 --> 00:58:12,600
Speaker 3: when I went to jump school watching the Rangers train.

1219
00:58:13,440 --> 00:58:14,760
Speaker 3: I forgot why I was up. I think I was

1220
00:58:14,760 --> 00:58:17,280
Speaker 3: coming back from Libboo or something. But watching the Rangers

1221
00:58:17,320 --> 00:58:20,440
Speaker 3: at like four am with the huge rocks and the

1222
00:58:20,440 --> 00:58:24,240
Speaker 3: glowtel just in a little train of dudes just running

1223
00:58:24,640 --> 00:58:27,080
Speaker 3: with an ungodly amount of weight. And I had a

1224
00:58:27,120 --> 00:58:28,480
Speaker 3: friend who ended up making it, and he said, like,

1225
00:58:28,520 --> 00:58:31,720
Speaker 3: that's what our training is, lots of waight long distances,

1226
00:58:31,800 --> 00:58:32,800
Speaker 3: because that's what we do.

1227
00:58:33,680 --> 00:58:35,400
Speaker 2: You know. Let me bring my dad back into this

1228
00:58:35,440 --> 00:58:37,800
Speaker 2: when I was a younger kid, like ten twelve, you know,

1229
00:58:38,000 --> 00:58:40,080
Speaker 2: and he'd be like, let's go. He would get his

1230
00:58:40,160 --> 00:58:42,320
Speaker 2: ruck and put it on, and I'd get my bike

1231
00:58:42,640 --> 00:58:45,480
Speaker 2: and we would literally go do a six mile rock

1232
00:58:45,600 --> 00:58:48,680
Speaker 2: run around Hill Air Force Space here in Lake in Utah.

1233
00:58:48,720 --> 00:58:51,280
Speaker 2: And I remember one time it was early in the morning.

1234
00:58:51,280 --> 00:58:52,920
Speaker 2: I see what time was it. It was pretty It's like

1235
00:58:52,960 --> 00:58:55,920
Speaker 2: either dawn or dusk it was. It was dark, and

1236
00:58:55,960 --> 00:58:57,840
Speaker 2: these guys rolled up next to us as we're running

1237
00:58:57,880 --> 00:58:59,880
Speaker 2: up the hill towards Hill Air Force Space and I'm

1238
00:59:00,040 --> 00:59:02,440
Speaker 2: riding my bike and my dad's rocking, okay, and he's

1239
00:59:02,480 --> 00:59:04,360
Speaker 2: running and he's rocking he's got like sixty pounds or

1240
00:59:04,360 --> 00:59:06,360
Speaker 2: so in his ruck. He always loaded it up with

1241
00:59:06,400 --> 00:59:09,400
Speaker 2: cinderblocks and whatnot, and yeah, and he's just going and

1242
00:59:09,400 --> 00:59:11,360
Speaker 2: they're like, hey, you guys need to ride onto the base.

1243
00:59:11,760 --> 00:59:14,520
Speaker 2: And my dad's like, nope, we're good. And he was

1244
00:59:14,560 --> 00:59:17,720
Speaker 2: just like and I was like, Dad, we're not even

1245
00:59:17,720 --> 00:59:20,240
Speaker 2: going on the base. We're going around the front of

1246
00:59:20,280 --> 00:59:22,439
Speaker 2: the flight line and then another three miles back home,

1247
00:59:22,520 --> 00:59:24,880
Speaker 2: right we'd already made the first three mile run. And

1248
00:59:24,880 --> 00:59:27,560
Speaker 2: He's like, yep, and I was like okay. And ever

1249
00:59:27,600 --> 00:59:29,160
Speaker 2: since then, I always wondered, you know, how come no

1250
00:59:29,200 --> 00:59:31,400
Speaker 2: one else wore a green beret at military bases when

1251
00:59:31,440 --> 00:59:32,840
Speaker 2: I was younger, I was like, why doesn't everybody else

1252
00:59:32,880 --> 00:59:33,360
Speaker 2: have a beret?

1253
00:59:33,520 --> 00:59:36,320
Speaker 3: How has how come they have trucker hats that dad

1254
00:59:36,440 --> 00:59:39,400
Speaker 3: arch returned. I remember one of my favorite memories is

1255
00:59:40,360 --> 00:59:42,760
Speaker 3: out of my infantry class. It was me and my

1256
00:59:42,800 --> 00:59:45,240
Speaker 3: friend de Shane had made uh We had actually made

1257
00:59:45,280 --> 00:59:47,480
Speaker 3: the indocks, so we knew we were going on to recon,

1258
00:59:47,760 --> 00:59:49,880
Speaker 3: but we still had to finish out infantry training. And

1259
00:59:49,920 --> 00:59:51,760
Speaker 3: one of the things is like a twenty k ruck

1260
00:59:52,800 --> 00:59:54,960
Speaker 3: and you have a gear list, so we fill our

1261
00:59:55,040 --> 00:59:58,560
Speaker 3: rucks and then you know young boys that we were,

1262
00:59:58,720 --> 01:00:01,760
Speaker 3: you know, challenging each other. We each found rock books, yeah,

1263
01:00:01,800 --> 01:00:05,240
Speaker 3: and we kept putting in rocks and so we threw

1264
01:00:05,320 --> 01:00:07,080
Speaker 3: rocks in our rocks and we did the whole rock.

1265
01:00:07,520 --> 01:00:12,280
Speaker 3: When we got back to our base, we were getting

1266
01:00:12,320 --> 01:00:15,280
Speaker 3: yelled at for something and our first sergeant it was

1267
01:00:15,720 --> 01:00:19,840
Speaker 3: just a machine. This huge guy started kicking people's rocks

1268
01:00:20,200 --> 01:00:23,760
Speaker 3: and he kills one kid and it just floats and

1269
01:00:23,760 --> 01:00:27,000
Speaker 3: he's like, everyone, dub out your rocks, right fucking now.

1270
01:00:27,680 --> 01:00:31,400
Speaker 3: So everyone's dumping out rocks and they have pillows, blankets,

1271
01:00:31,680 --> 01:00:34,400
Speaker 3: they have not they didn't do the gearless, and they

1272
01:00:34,440 --> 01:00:36,400
Speaker 3: got to me, and me and DeShane were squadis at

1273
01:00:36,400 --> 01:00:38,200
Speaker 3: the time, and I just remember like we were like

1274
01:00:38,240 --> 01:00:39,640
Speaker 3: look at each other and we dumped it out and

1275
01:00:39,640 --> 01:00:42,160
Speaker 3: there's a whole gearless and then to Shane had this

1276
01:00:42,280 --> 01:00:45,160
Speaker 3: rock that good god, it was so big, and our

1277
01:00:45,200 --> 01:00:48,120
Speaker 3: first sharg was just like YouTube, go go back in

1278
01:00:48,160 --> 01:00:49,640
Speaker 3: the barracks, you don't need to be a part of this,

1279
01:00:50,000 --> 01:00:52,040
Speaker 3: and just streamed at the rest of them like and

1280
01:00:52,080 --> 01:00:55,600
Speaker 3: that's like but again, like that's the personality type that

1281
01:00:55,640 --> 01:00:59,680
Speaker 3: it attracts is you know, like where's the line? Where

1282
01:00:59,800 --> 01:01:02,040
Speaker 3: is that thing that I'm gonna say, I can't do

1283
01:01:02,080 --> 01:01:06,320
Speaker 3: it anymore. I had a friend go through the Raiders

1284
01:01:06,560 --> 01:01:09,000
Speaker 3: that's wild the Raiders right now, and he told me

1285
01:01:09,040 --> 01:01:11,600
Speaker 3: a story about you know, doing their in dock. And

1286
01:01:11,640 --> 01:01:13,760
Speaker 3: he was climbing the rope and the guys that climb

1287
01:01:13,760 --> 01:01:16,160
Speaker 3: the rope and he did climb it again, climb it again,

1288
01:01:16,200 --> 01:01:17,760
Speaker 3: and by like the fifth time, his hands are getting

1289
01:01:17,760 --> 01:01:19,760
Speaker 3: bloody and he couldn't make it, and he drops back

1290
01:01:19,800 --> 01:01:22,840
Speaker 3: down and guy's like climbing again, tries again. He did

1291
01:01:22,840 --> 01:01:25,040
Speaker 3: this for like fourteen times, and he like the last time,

1292
01:01:25,080 --> 01:01:27,080
Speaker 3: he's barely making it two feet. But every time the

1293
01:01:27,120 --> 01:01:30,439
Speaker 3: guy asked, he's trying the Googler rope again. Never never

1294
01:01:30,560 --> 01:01:33,880
Speaker 3: once said no, never once gave him flat. He's like, right,

1295
01:01:34,840 --> 01:01:36,920
Speaker 3: like Roger that tried to climb again. Guy's like, all right,

1296
01:01:36,960 --> 01:01:39,520
Speaker 3: you're good, move on, because that's that's the guy you

1297
01:01:39,560 --> 01:01:42,680
Speaker 3: want on the team. Is the indomitable. You don't necessarily

1298
01:01:42,720 --> 01:01:45,160
Speaker 3: need the most athletic, the most this the most you

1299
01:01:45,200 --> 01:01:48,200
Speaker 3: want the guy who will never say quit, will never

1300
01:01:48,360 --> 01:01:51,800
Speaker 3: you know, will never ever give up. We had this

1301
01:01:51,800 --> 01:01:55,760
Speaker 3: one kid that we actually brought on who he looked

1302
01:01:55,760 --> 01:01:57,280
Speaker 3: like an oopa looom book is the best way I

1303
01:01:57,280 --> 01:01:59,400
Speaker 3: can describe it. He was He would never be the

1304
01:01:59,400 --> 01:02:02,280
Speaker 3: guy that you would pick out of a lineup and

1305
01:02:02,360 --> 01:02:03,880
Speaker 3: be like, that's the guy I want on my team.

1306
01:02:04,280 --> 01:02:06,720
Speaker 3: He ended up being one of the best operators in

1307
01:02:06,760 --> 01:02:10,680
Speaker 3: the world. Like legitimately, never stop smiling, never not had

1308
01:02:10,720 --> 01:02:13,920
Speaker 3: a joke, never, he never went anything but one speed.

1309
01:02:13,960 --> 01:02:16,360
Speaker 3: You could load him with a thousand pounds same speed.

1310
01:02:16,600 --> 01:02:18,680
Speaker 3: He'd never go faster, but he would never go slower.

1311
01:02:19,000 --> 01:02:20,600
Speaker 3: And he was just that guy. He was indomitable. He

1312
01:02:20,640 --> 01:02:22,680
Speaker 3: would just never he would never quit, and he always

1313
01:02:22,720 --> 01:02:24,560
Speaker 3: had a joke and a laugh when you needed it,

1314
01:02:24,640 --> 01:02:26,560
Speaker 3: and you're just like, this is the guy you want.

1315
01:02:27,000 --> 01:02:28,840
Speaker 3: You know, a lot of the guys who looked good

1316
01:02:28,880 --> 01:02:31,920
Speaker 3: going into the indoc and who ran perfect PFTs and stuff.

1317
01:02:32,320 --> 01:02:36,200
Speaker 3: Second it got hard, they crumbled, They folded, They didn't

1318
01:02:36,200 --> 01:02:38,640
Speaker 3: know what it was to fail, and then at be

1319
01:02:38,720 --> 01:02:41,640
Speaker 3: asked to move on, you know, oh we'll keep going going.

1320
01:02:41,680 --> 01:02:43,920
Speaker 2: Oh yeah. Growing up with Dad, you know his teams,

1321
01:02:44,200 --> 01:02:48,280
Speaker 2: the guys were just a collage of different sizes. I

1322
01:02:48,280 --> 01:02:51,600
Speaker 2: remember Kim he was probably like five foot four and

1323
01:02:51,640 --> 01:02:55,160
Speaker 2: he was an Asian dude and fast and just five

1324
01:02:55,160 --> 01:02:57,280
Speaker 2: foot four mm hmm. That's what I'm saying. You know,

1325
01:02:57,320 --> 01:02:59,040
Speaker 2: you don't have to be six foot four like me

1326
01:02:59,200 --> 01:03:01,600
Speaker 2: and two hundred and seven the muscles. In fact, my

1327
01:03:01,640 --> 01:03:03,840
Speaker 2: dad was saying, like, sometimes those guys just you know,

1328
01:03:03,920 --> 01:03:05,960
Speaker 2: don't make it. They don't have the stamina.

1329
01:03:06,360 --> 01:03:08,680
Speaker 3: My favorite part about we just watched a movie about

1330
01:03:09,440 --> 01:03:12,040
Speaker 3: I believe the says it's a guy Ritchie film just

1331
01:03:12,040 --> 01:03:13,480
Speaker 3: came out. I forgot what it's called.

1332
01:03:14,680 --> 01:03:16,480
Speaker 2: Oh, the Gentleman.

1333
01:03:17,640 --> 01:03:21,240
Speaker 3: Ministry of gentle Warfare, and there's you know, you're seeing

1334
01:03:21,280 --> 01:03:24,480
Speaker 3: the guys and you're like, oh, you know, there's huge,

1335
01:03:24,480 --> 01:03:28,439
Speaker 3: you're muscular. And then they show the actual says guys

1336
01:03:28,480 --> 01:03:31,000
Speaker 3: at the end and they all look like pencil pushers.

1337
01:03:31,160 --> 01:03:34,240
Speaker 3: They're these thin, gaunt, you know, glasses and you're just

1338
01:03:34,320 --> 01:03:36,760
Speaker 3: like That is when we actually got to go over

1339
01:03:36,800 --> 01:03:42,160
Speaker 3: to Delta. At one point, Bobby Rivera had friends over there,

1340
01:03:42,200 --> 01:03:44,640
Speaker 3: so we were asking permissions, Hey can we come with you? Hey,

1341
01:03:44,640 --> 01:03:46,840
Speaker 3: can we you know, can we do anything for you guys?

1342
01:03:47,080 --> 01:03:49,040
Speaker 3: Do you have anything for us? But I remember just

1343
01:03:49,120 --> 01:03:51,200
Speaker 3: meeting some of these guys and they were just wildly

1344
01:03:51,240 --> 01:03:53,800
Speaker 3: not what you know, the movies that portrayed where you

1345
01:03:53,840 --> 01:03:56,880
Speaker 3: know it's not Jesse Ventura, you know, all hopped up

1346
01:03:56,920 --> 01:04:00,160
Speaker 3: on steroids. They were all just these little dudes. You

1347
01:04:00,200 --> 01:04:02,680
Speaker 3: were just like beards and like they you know, one

1348
01:04:02,760 --> 01:04:05,960
Speaker 3: hundred and forty pounds. You're just like, that's not exactly

1349
01:04:05,960 --> 01:04:08,560
Speaker 3: what I thought, But now it makes total sense.

1350
01:04:09,120 --> 01:04:11,600
Speaker 2: One of those Delta boys I know who was hunting

1351
01:04:11,640 --> 01:04:16,560
Speaker 2: Bin Lodden through Tora Bora. His nickname's Hobbit. Yeah, I

1352
01:04:16,600 --> 01:04:19,439
Speaker 2: want you know because he fits that yeah name. Yeah,

1353
01:04:19,440 --> 01:04:20,760
Speaker 2: he's a smaller dude and.

1354
01:04:20,720 --> 01:04:23,200
Speaker 3: It's a personality type. It has nothing to do with physicality.

1355
01:04:23,320 --> 01:04:25,640
Speaker 3: It's just that who's never gonna not quit.

1356
01:04:26,440 --> 01:04:28,880
Speaker 2: Right. And my buddy who went through Marine Corps training,

1357
01:04:28,880 --> 01:04:31,560
Speaker 2: you know, the Army didn't want him because he was colorblind.

1358
01:04:31,600 --> 01:04:33,720
Speaker 2: He just wanted to be like military police in the

1359
01:04:33,800 --> 01:04:36,040
Speaker 2: army something so bad. He went to the Army they

1360
01:04:36,040 --> 01:04:38,160
Speaker 2: said no, and he went to the Marine Corps and

1361
01:04:38,200 --> 01:04:40,480
Speaker 2: they said we'll take you, and they sent him to Soy.

1362
01:04:40,840 --> 01:04:44,000
Speaker 2: He's five foot two. He used to We have a

1363
01:04:44,040 --> 01:04:47,000
Speaker 2: big backpack at my combat store that I own, and

1364
01:04:47,240 --> 01:04:50,000
Speaker 2: there's a photo of him in it, like peeking out,

1365
01:04:50,120 --> 01:04:53,960
Speaker 2: like like my backpack troll that I'm gonna throw across

1366
01:04:53,960 --> 01:04:56,959
Speaker 2: the zombie yard. You know. It's like, you know he's

1367
01:04:57,240 --> 01:05:00,560
Speaker 2: but he's full on three eleven, he sent me a

1368
01:05:00,600 --> 01:05:03,160
Speaker 2: picture from Basic where he's a boot camp where he's

1369
01:05:03,160 --> 01:05:05,439
Speaker 2: got his whole ruck on his back and he's looking

1370
01:05:05,480 --> 01:05:07,480
Speaker 2: in a mirror and it's almost bigger than he is,

1371
01:05:08,240 --> 01:05:12,040
Speaker 2: you know. And and he went up the Reaper and

1372
01:05:12,080 --> 01:05:14,360
Speaker 2: got his ego globe and anchor and was able to

1373
01:05:14,360 --> 01:05:15,880
Speaker 2: put one foot in front of the other foot in

1374
01:05:15,880 --> 01:05:17,600
Speaker 2: front of the other foot in front of the other foot.

1375
01:05:17,920 --> 01:05:19,800
Speaker 2: He didn't run up it. He just put a foot

1376
01:05:19,840 --> 01:05:21,320
Speaker 2: in front of another foot, you know. And that's where

1377
01:05:21,360 --> 01:05:24,520
Speaker 2: I get that donkey analogy from, when you see donkeys

1378
01:05:24,560 --> 01:05:26,440
Speaker 2: with all that gear on them and they're still just

1379
01:05:26,480 --> 01:05:29,320
Speaker 2: going up the mountain, just walking one step. They might

1380
01:05:29,320 --> 01:05:31,520
Speaker 2: slip on a step, but they're still going up the step.

1381
01:05:32,160 --> 01:05:34,400
Speaker 2: Donkey thighs, bro. That's what I train myself. I go

1382
01:05:34,440 --> 01:05:36,000
Speaker 2: to the gym just about every day, and I'm going

1383
01:05:36,080 --> 01:05:38,160
Speaker 2: to bring this around to your gym. I go boxing,

1384
01:05:38,240 --> 01:05:41,560
Speaker 2: right so I box here in Salt Lake, and I'm

1385
01:05:41,560 --> 01:05:43,440
Speaker 2: an announcer in the ring. I'm like ladies and gentleman

1386
01:05:43,480 --> 01:05:46,680
Speaker 2: out of the blue corner. It comes you know, Brennan,

1387
01:05:46,920 --> 01:05:52,800
Speaker 2: you know with Valhalla Boys, and so I can I

1388
01:05:53,000 --> 01:05:55,640
Speaker 2: love that you have a gym. Right, so you've transitioned

1389
01:05:55,640 --> 01:05:59,600
Speaker 2: now into an author. Okay, totally awesome. But you're also

1390
01:06:00,120 --> 01:06:03,560
Speaker 2: entrepreneur and you have it seems like the same wife

1391
01:06:03,680 --> 01:06:06,000
Speaker 2: that was with you during your en listener. Were you

1392
01:06:06,040 --> 01:06:10,840
Speaker 2: guys married together? So that's okay, that's okay.

1393
01:06:10,920 --> 01:06:14,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, we were one of the other nicknames for second

1394
01:06:14,800 --> 01:06:17,760
Speaker 3: divorce recon Uh it happens.

1395
01:06:18,240 --> 01:06:18,360
Speaker 2: Uh.

1396
01:06:18,520 --> 01:06:22,080
Speaker 3: The the deployments didn't really go well for everybody. A

1397
01:06:22,080 --> 01:06:24,040
Speaker 3: lot of guys came back to the horse papers and

1398
01:06:24,040 --> 01:06:24,720
Speaker 3: stuff like that.

1399
01:06:25,120 --> 01:06:25,600
Speaker 2: Uh.

1400
01:06:25,760 --> 01:06:28,640
Speaker 3: But regardless, So, like we had our problems, we broke up.

1401
01:06:29,520 --> 01:06:33,160
Speaker 3: We share a daughter together, so she's my kids biological.

1402
01:06:33,600 --> 01:06:37,080
Speaker 3: I remarried to an incredible woman, so I have two wives.

1403
01:06:37,320 --> 01:06:41,800
Speaker 3: But in the between, I started a gym. I got

1404
01:06:41,800 --> 01:06:44,440
Speaker 3: back to. So I live in northeast Pennsylvania, like Scrayton.

1405
01:06:44,480 --> 01:06:48,600
Speaker 3: If you ever watched The Office, Yeah, so we're we're there.

1406
01:06:49,360 --> 01:06:52,840
Speaker 3: And I didn't know what I wanted. Yeah, yeah, a

1407
01:06:52,840 --> 01:06:54,560
Speaker 3: little bit little stuff, but like so I didn't know

1408
01:06:54,560 --> 01:06:56,520
Speaker 3: what I wanted to do with my life, and uh,

1409
01:06:56,640 --> 01:06:59,520
Speaker 3: I just wanted it to be something that I could

1410
01:06:59,600 --> 01:07:03,240
Speaker 3: feel meaningful about. So I had my writing kind of

1411
01:07:03,280 --> 01:07:06,160
Speaker 3: as a hustle. But like so, I taught classes. So

1412
01:07:06,400 --> 01:07:08,000
Speaker 3: it wasn't a gym where you just go in and

1413
01:07:08,000 --> 01:07:10,680
Speaker 3: you work out. It was class base. So we had

1414
01:07:11,120 --> 01:07:14,160
Speaker 3: nine classes a day starting at six. Yeah, and so

1415
01:07:14,240 --> 01:07:16,320
Speaker 3: every day I was a coach. So I would go in,

1416
01:07:16,480 --> 01:07:18,600
Speaker 3: I'd bring people in, I would start, you know, soup

1417
01:07:18,680 --> 01:07:20,960
Speaker 3: to nuts, how to how to do fitness, to that

1418
01:07:21,040 --> 01:07:21,600
Speaker 3: kind of stuff.

1419
01:07:21,800 --> 01:07:21,920
Speaker 2: Uh.

1420
01:07:22,000 --> 01:07:26,200
Speaker 3: And then we got we got huge. We actually so sad.

1421
01:07:26,240 --> 01:07:28,600
Speaker 3: Note to the story, our neighbor just broke through our

1422
01:07:28,640 --> 01:07:31,600
Speaker 3: wall and shut our gym down, blast us. So that sucks.

1423
01:07:32,080 --> 01:07:34,560
Speaker 3: But so we were operated for about fift Yeah, it's

1424
01:07:34,640 --> 01:07:36,720
Speaker 3: its own, it's its own horrible story.

1425
01:07:37,160 --> 01:07:37,960
Speaker 2: I'm so sorry.

1426
01:07:38,840 --> 01:07:42,760
Speaker 3: Uh, I'm not as as upset as I think people

1427
01:07:42,800 --> 01:07:45,880
Speaker 3: thought i'd be because I was. I was actually secretly

1428
01:07:46,000 --> 01:07:49,880
Speaker 3: in the uh process of selling it because I was

1429
01:07:49,920 --> 01:07:51,440
Speaker 3: I feel like that stage of my life was kind

1430
01:07:51,440 --> 01:07:54,520
Speaker 3: of winding down. My daughter's ten. She still wants to

1431
01:07:54,520 --> 01:07:57,040
Speaker 3: hang out with me, so it's like while the while

1432
01:07:57,040 --> 01:07:59,200
Speaker 3: the getting's good, like I should like. So I was

1433
01:07:59,200 --> 01:08:01,800
Speaker 3: actually going to trainransitioned into selling it and then just

1434
01:08:01,840 --> 01:08:05,919
Speaker 3: coaching a little like halftime, and then my wife has

1435
01:08:06,000 --> 01:08:08,920
Speaker 3: an incredible job, and so like I was gonna take

1436
01:08:08,920 --> 01:08:12,040
Speaker 3: a little time back and just write more, and so

1437
01:08:12,080 --> 01:08:14,240
Speaker 3: they just really just sped up my writing career as

1438
01:08:14,280 --> 01:08:16,760
Speaker 3: far as like my other book series and stuff like that.

1439
01:08:18,080 --> 01:08:19,960
Speaker 3: But so every day I get to go into this

1440
01:08:20,080 --> 01:08:23,120
Speaker 3: gym and you know, meet these new people from the

1441
01:08:23,120 --> 01:08:25,600
Speaker 3: first time who were scared, and lead them through, Like

1442
01:08:25,720 --> 01:08:27,400
Speaker 3: because I had a bad fitness journey, like I was

1443
01:08:27,400 --> 01:08:30,360
Speaker 3: a little fat kid. I believe it because everyone, like

1444
01:08:30,360 --> 01:08:32,200
Speaker 3: everyone sees pictures of me from high school, like I

1445
01:08:32,240 --> 01:08:33,000
Speaker 3: was a theater geek.

1446
01:08:33,160 --> 01:08:34,400
Speaker 2: Here I was.

1447
01:08:34,479 --> 01:08:37,679
Speaker 3: Overweight, long hair down on my shoulders, like I never

1448
01:08:38,479 --> 01:08:41,320
Speaker 3: wanted to go to the military, but it never like clicked.

1449
01:08:41,360 --> 01:08:43,960
Speaker 3: And so like now when I meet people from my past,

1450
01:08:44,160 --> 01:08:47,400
Speaker 3: like what happened, I was like I don't, like I

1451
01:08:47,439 --> 01:08:49,680
Speaker 3: realized I had to get into shape, like because I

1452
01:08:50,120 --> 01:08:52,679
Speaker 3: know I had a freshman a freshman class in college

1453
01:08:52,680 --> 01:08:55,160
Speaker 3: where one of my professors called me out. He's like,

1454
01:08:55,200 --> 01:08:56,760
Speaker 3: if you don't, if you keep half half in your

1455
01:08:56,880 --> 01:08:59,160
Speaker 3: entire life, you're gonna be flipping burgers for your fucking life.

1456
01:08:59,600 --> 01:09:01,599
Speaker 3: And that was like my epiphany moment where I think

1457
01:09:01,640 --> 01:09:03,719
Speaker 3: the next day I started at the gym at five am,

1458
01:09:03,880 --> 01:09:05,920
Speaker 3: would go for three hours a day. I went from

1459
01:09:05,920 --> 01:09:08,559
Speaker 3: like two hundred and twenty five pounds down about one

1460
01:09:08,680 --> 01:09:10,720
Speaker 3: sixty five then back up to about two o' five

1461
01:09:10,800 --> 01:09:13,559
Speaker 3: a meet, like really hit it hard and stuff like that.

1462
01:09:13,920 --> 01:09:16,080
Speaker 3: And so like for me, that was a huge turning

1463
01:09:16,120 --> 01:09:18,040
Speaker 3: point in my life of like really like kind of

1464
01:09:18,040 --> 01:09:21,080
Speaker 3: taking control because I was I was that kind of

1465
01:09:21,080 --> 01:09:24,240
Speaker 3: like overweight, just sarcastic, little shithead you don't want in

1466
01:09:24,280 --> 01:09:27,080
Speaker 3: your class probably or like at your job. And so

1467
01:09:27,920 --> 01:09:29,960
Speaker 3: it really turned me onto a good path. And then

1468
01:09:29,960 --> 01:09:32,479
Speaker 3: the military put me on an even better path, and

1469
01:09:32,520 --> 01:09:34,800
Speaker 3: so I feel like it prepared me so I wanted

1470
01:09:34,800 --> 01:09:37,559
Speaker 3: to share that journey with other people, which I love.

1471
01:09:37,640 --> 01:09:40,519
Speaker 3: For fifteen years. It was I cannot imagine a better

1472
01:09:40,640 --> 01:09:46,519
Speaker 3: job where I could make my own schedule as my boss.

1473
01:09:46,560 --> 01:09:49,639
Speaker 3: You know. So like I saw, I saw my child,

1474
01:09:49,720 --> 01:09:51,640
Speaker 3: I think more than any parent who is not a

1475
01:09:51,680 --> 01:09:54,320
Speaker 3: stay at home parent, if you have a full time job.

1476
01:09:54,680 --> 01:09:57,479
Speaker 3: I made sure I saw my kid more than anybody

1477
01:09:57,479 --> 01:09:59,720
Speaker 3: else in the world. And so she actually didn't think

1478
01:09:59,760 --> 01:10:01,559
Speaker 3: I had a job for a while because I would

1479
01:10:01,560 --> 01:10:04,519
Speaker 3: work when she was either at school or at daycare

1480
01:10:04,920 --> 01:10:06,600
Speaker 3: or like whatever. And then like I would just I

1481
01:10:06,640 --> 01:10:07,920
Speaker 3: would have five days just.

1482
01:10:08,400 --> 01:10:10,600
Speaker 2: You're always around, You're always available. It's like, oh, you

1483
01:10:10,600 --> 01:10:11,760
Speaker 2: want me to be the coach. I'm going to help

1484
01:10:11,800 --> 01:10:13,360
Speaker 2: you keep score. You want me to help you throw

1485
01:10:13,360 --> 01:10:16,120
Speaker 2: the ball. It's like, yeah, you know, we have.

1486
01:10:16,040 --> 01:10:18,439
Speaker 3: A great relationship because of that. And then just it

1487
01:10:18,479 --> 01:10:20,960
Speaker 3: really just let me have the quality of life where

1488
01:10:20,960 --> 01:10:22,320
Speaker 3: like I got to set my own schedule so I

1489
01:10:22,320 --> 01:10:25,120
Speaker 3: can actually have time to write and time to do

1490
01:10:25,160 --> 01:10:28,240
Speaker 3: this and time to that. And like I think, and

1491
01:10:28,280 --> 01:10:30,639
Speaker 3: I was actually just talking with another Marine who owns

1492
01:10:30,680 --> 01:10:33,559
Speaker 3: a business, and there's something about military people coming out

1493
01:10:33,600 --> 01:10:37,000
Speaker 3: that I think make really good entrepreneurs because one, we're

1494
01:10:37,040 --> 01:10:39,439
Speaker 3: just cocky as fuck, you know, you're just you believe

1495
01:10:39,439 --> 01:10:41,719
Speaker 3: in yourself. You're like, this isn't gonna fail. I'm gonna

1496
01:10:41,760 --> 01:10:45,559
Speaker 3: do this, like and so. But then also logistically, like

1497
01:10:45,720 --> 01:10:47,320
Speaker 3: I knew, like I knew how to do and if

1498
01:10:47,320 --> 01:10:49,960
Speaker 3: it was all on me, if it fails, it's on me,

1499
01:10:50,000 --> 01:10:52,240
Speaker 3: I'm just gonna work harder. And so you're gonna take

1500
01:10:52,280 --> 01:10:54,760
Speaker 3: that work ethic from over here where we got we

1501
01:10:54,840 --> 01:10:57,800
Speaker 3: got me instual operations, and I ended up having one

1502
01:10:57,800 --> 01:11:00,360
Speaker 3: of the biggest gyms on the East coast, uh for

1503
01:11:00,479 --> 01:11:02,439
Speaker 3: you know, for what I did, and like you know,

1504
01:11:02,479 --> 01:11:05,760
Speaker 3: I had tons of members. Everything was going really well.

1505
01:11:05,840 --> 01:11:09,120
Speaker 3: I had employees that I paid ridiculous wages to, Like

1506
01:11:09,160 --> 01:11:10,800
Speaker 3: I got to do all the things that I'd ever

1507
01:11:10,880 --> 01:11:16,040
Speaker 3: want to do really stress free until the wall break,

1508
01:11:16,439 --> 01:11:19,280
Speaker 3: which was its own little personal health. But until that time,

1509
01:11:19,360 --> 01:11:21,200
Speaker 3: like it was the best fifteen years I could possibly

1510
01:11:21,200 --> 01:11:24,240
Speaker 3: imagine as a job, especially coming out of the military,

1511
01:11:24,240 --> 01:11:27,519
Speaker 3: where you have no say to, You're on your own.

1512
01:11:28,160 --> 01:11:31,280
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, so I know what it's like to not

1513
01:11:31,320 --> 01:11:33,160
Speaker 2: have say to. Now you have your own say You're like,

1514
01:11:33,200 --> 01:11:35,599
Speaker 2: I'm going to take full advantage of this. I'm going

1515
01:11:35,640 --> 01:11:38,360
Speaker 2: to you know, make the most out of myself with

1516
01:11:38,520 --> 01:11:40,639
Speaker 2: my say yeah. And you know the number one thing

1517
01:11:40,640 --> 01:11:44,360
Speaker 2: that makes an entrepreneur an entrepreneur is being jobless. Yeah.

1518
01:11:44,400 --> 01:11:47,120
Speaker 2: So it's like it's like, how do I get something

1519
01:11:47,160 --> 01:11:49,320
Speaker 2: to eat today? How am I gonna hustle? You know?

1520
01:11:49,520 --> 01:11:51,040
Speaker 2: And so next And I think.

1521
01:11:50,920 --> 01:11:53,280
Speaker 3: For me, like I was always I was always going

1522
01:11:53,360 --> 01:11:54,400
Speaker 3: to go to the gym. I knew that, Like I

1523
01:11:54,400 --> 01:11:56,240
Speaker 3: was always gonna I was always gonna work out. So

1524
01:11:56,280 --> 01:11:57,720
Speaker 3: it's like, yeah, right now I don't have to pay

1525
01:11:57,720 --> 01:11:59,680
Speaker 3: for a gym membership. Now I get to build it

1526
01:11:59,680 --> 01:12:02,320
Speaker 3: exactly how I want, like and now I have acts

1527
01:12:02,360 --> 01:12:04,479
Speaker 3: of twenty four seven who have bossom space, so like,

1528
01:12:04,800 --> 01:12:08,960
Speaker 3: it all just made sense to me. And until almost

1529
01:12:09,000 --> 01:12:12,280
Speaker 3: I would say, through high school, I was planning on

1530
01:12:12,320 --> 01:12:13,720
Speaker 3: being when I got out of the military, I was

1531
01:12:13,760 --> 01:12:16,960
Speaker 3: planning on being a school teacher. And my mom talked

1532
01:12:17,000 --> 01:12:18,799
Speaker 3: me out of it because she was a school teacher,

1533
01:12:18,920 --> 01:12:20,840
Speaker 3: and she's like, I love you to death, but I

1534
01:12:20,840 --> 01:12:23,120
Speaker 3: don't think you're gonna be able to handle the parents

1535
01:12:23,160 --> 01:12:27,560
Speaker 3: of these kids without trouble, like right everything, because she

1536
01:12:27,720 --> 01:12:29,639
Speaker 3: was she got out right as I was going into

1537
01:12:29,640 --> 01:12:32,599
Speaker 3: the military and stuff. She retired, and she was right,

1538
01:12:33,160 --> 01:12:36,000
Speaker 3: I think the state of parents in teaching right now

1539
01:12:36,080 --> 01:12:37,960
Speaker 3: is not where I don't think I could handle it.

1540
01:12:38,040 --> 01:12:40,160
Speaker 3: But I still wanted to teach, so I was like, well,

1541
01:12:40,160 --> 01:12:42,240
Speaker 3: what can I do that I can teach and still

1542
01:12:42,240 --> 01:12:44,519
Speaker 3: do the things I love And so it worked really

1543
01:12:44,520 --> 01:12:47,240
Speaker 3: really well for me. I really enjoyed my job one

1544
01:12:47,320 --> 01:12:51,400
Speaker 3: hundred percent. Like I came every day to the gym

1545
01:12:51,479 --> 01:12:55,160
Speaker 3: really just happy, really just pleased with everything that went.

1546
01:12:56,800 --> 01:12:58,680
Speaker 2: It's your pill, you know how they wanted to give

1547
01:12:58,680 --> 01:13:01,320
Speaker 2: you a pill at therapy or like take these things.

1548
01:13:01,479 --> 01:13:03,880
Speaker 2: We have a mantra here at soft Rep Radio which

1549
01:13:03,920 --> 01:13:07,720
Speaker 2: is thrills before pills. So if you can go outside,

1550
01:13:07,920 --> 01:13:10,000
Speaker 2: if you can go for a hike in your local area,

1551
01:13:10,080 --> 01:13:12,479
Speaker 2: go to the park, walk around your own little community

1552
01:13:12,479 --> 01:13:14,879
Speaker 2: that if you live in an apartment complex, just go outside.

1553
01:13:14,960 --> 01:13:16,040
Speaker 2: Just what I mean.

1554
01:13:16,160 --> 01:13:19,160
Speaker 3: My best friend's Kyle. We talk about squat therapy all

1555
01:13:19,200 --> 01:13:21,599
Speaker 3: the time. You know, having a bad day, therapy, go.

1556
01:13:21,560 --> 01:13:23,880
Speaker 2: Squat therapy, baby, Like that was yesterday for me.

1557
01:13:23,920 --> 01:13:25,920
Speaker 3: Bro put some weight up and all of a sudden,

1558
01:13:25,960 --> 01:13:28,720
Speaker 3: like people don't understand, like just having momentum in your

1559
01:13:28,760 --> 01:13:30,439
Speaker 3: life and having that like thing where you can look

1560
01:13:30,439 --> 01:13:32,720
Speaker 3: at me like, man, that was pretty actually that was

1561
01:13:32,720 --> 01:13:35,519
Speaker 3: pretty good, like and just having that forward momentum, like

1562
01:13:35,560 --> 01:13:37,559
Speaker 3: it really does help. Like you can be having the

1563
01:13:37,560 --> 01:13:40,439
Speaker 3: shittiest day, you put some weight up, you run fast,

1564
01:13:40,560 --> 01:13:43,920
Speaker 3: you do something where you feel like you did something proactive.

1565
01:13:44,439 --> 01:13:44,639
Speaker 2: Man.

1566
01:13:44,680 --> 01:13:46,799
Speaker 3: That that's that's that's the best thing in the world

1567
01:13:46,880 --> 01:13:48,760
Speaker 3: as far as like you know, keeping it out.

1568
01:13:49,560 --> 01:13:51,200
Speaker 2: Well, it's great because like I said, I took on

1569
01:13:51,240 --> 01:13:52,800
Speaker 2: this mantra of like I gotta go to the gym

1570
01:13:52,840 --> 01:13:54,799
Speaker 2: before the doctor tells me, I gotta go to the gym.

1571
01:13:55,040 --> 01:13:56,400
Speaker 2: You know, I don't want to take a pill till

1572
01:13:56,439 --> 01:13:58,000
Speaker 2: the doct until I go to the gym. All these

1573
01:13:58,280 --> 01:14:00,280
Speaker 2: types of thing. So for the last two years, I've

1574
01:14:00,320 --> 01:14:03,080
Speaker 2: just been really religious. I've got four hundred days in

1575
01:14:03,080 --> 01:14:06,200
Speaker 2: the gym in the last two years. I joined June

1576
01:14:06,560 --> 01:14:08,960
Speaker 2: of twenty twenty three, and it'll be this June will

1577
01:14:08,960 --> 01:14:10,559
Speaker 2: be two years. So I've almost got four hundred days

1578
01:14:10,600 --> 01:14:16,280
Speaker 2: in of boxing, right, And my wife totally now loves

1579
01:14:16,320 --> 01:14:19,559
Speaker 2: to work out, wants to always hit the gym. My son,

1580
01:14:19,840 --> 01:14:21,519
Speaker 2: he's like, Dad, I take Jim at class. You know,

1581
01:14:21,600 --> 01:14:23,960
Speaker 2: he's in weightlifting in high school. So now we got

1582
01:14:24,040 --> 01:14:27,000
Speaker 2: him a dimpledll wreck pass here where I live, and

1583
01:14:27,040 --> 01:14:28,439
Speaker 2: I go with him and he's like, no, hold it

1584
01:14:28,520 --> 01:14:31,120
Speaker 2: like this, and I'm like, all right, all right, all right,

1585
01:14:31,120 --> 01:14:33,320
Speaker 2: I'll hold the bar just right. You know, Dad's laying

1586
01:14:33,360 --> 01:14:35,200
Speaker 2: down on the bench trying to lift at least two

1587
01:14:35,240 --> 01:14:37,200
Speaker 2: thirty five plates in a bar. Okay, here we go.

1588
01:14:37,280 --> 01:14:39,200
Speaker 2: You know, just I'm not trying to go for broke.

1589
01:14:39,640 --> 01:14:41,640
Speaker 2: I'm just trying to, you know, be a part of

1590
01:14:41,680 --> 01:14:43,920
Speaker 2: what he wants. And I see him lift and he's like,

1591
01:14:43,920 --> 01:14:45,760
Speaker 2: I'm putting more plates on. I'm like, what are you doing.

1592
01:14:46,360 --> 01:14:48,200
Speaker 2: He's like, I'm putting two forty fives on both sides.

1593
01:14:48,200 --> 01:14:49,720
Speaker 2: I'm try to do that. And then he goes over

1594
01:14:49,760 --> 01:14:51,439
Speaker 2: and he does like you know, the dead lift where

1595
01:14:51,439 --> 01:14:53,040
Speaker 2: he lifts it up and he's like, you will put

1596
01:14:53,040 --> 01:14:55,080
Speaker 2: your hand this way in this way on the bar, Dad,

1597
01:14:55,080 --> 01:14:57,120
Speaker 2: And I'm like, thank you, sonya. See.

1598
01:14:57,320 --> 01:14:59,639
Speaker 3: Also I totally agree, like I was. I was actually

1599
01:14:59,640 --> 01:15:01,040
Speaker 3: like when I like I was, I was really in

1600
01:15:01,080 --> 01:15:04,120
Speaker 3: a punk rock when I was younger. Henry Rollins, yeah,

1601
01:15:04,000 --> 01:15:06,920
Speaker 3: oh yeah, oh god yeah. But like Henry Rollins talks

1602
01:15:06,960 --> 01:15:09,200
Speaker 3: about this if you're even the black flag and stuff

1603
01:15:09,240 --> 01:15:12,080
Speaker 3: like that. But like, of course Rollins was a huge proponent,

1604
01:15:12,080 --> 01:15:14,519
Speaker 3: and like as a kid, like there's this jack dude

1605
01:15:14,560 --> 01:15:16,960
Speaker 3: jumping around on stage singing the songs I love. But

1606
01:15:17,000 --> 01:15:20,400
Speaker 3: then he's talking about like be active, be physical, man,

1607
01:15:20,520 --> 01:15:22,760
Speaker 3: like you got one body, you got one life, like

1608
01:15:22,880 --> 01:15:25,400
Speaker 3: go do something, uh, And so that that made a

1609
01:15:25,479 --> 01:15:27,719
Speaker 3: huge difference for me as a kid. When I finally

1610
01:15:27,760 --> 01:15:29,000
Speaker 3: started in on it, and I was like, man, I

1611
01:15:29,000 --> 01:15:31,200
Speaker 3: can't believe I've been missing this because my brother was

1612
01:15:31,240 --> 01:15:33,880
Speaker 3: the star athlete you know, all through high school, captain

1613
01:15:33,880 --> 01:15:36,160
Speaker 3: of everything. So I was like, nope, not doing that,

1614
01:15:36,320 --> 01:15:36,719
Speaker 3: Like I'm.

1615
01:15:36,560 --> 01:15:37,200
Speaker 2: Gonna go with my own.

1616
01:15:37,640 --> 01:15:39,200
Speaker 3: And then I realized I was like I probably should

1617
01:15:39,200 --> 01:15:39,519
Speaker 3: have done that.

1618
01:15:39,560 --> 01:15:42,560
Speaker 2: You're like, I'm gonna go skate, yeah, skate.

1619
01:15:42,320 --> 01:15:45,720
Speaker 3: Theater and like punk rock, oh yeah, all stuff.

1620
01:15:46,880 --> 01:15:50,439
Speaker 2: And then the recruiters like, come here, skater boy. Oh.

1621
01:15:50,479 --> 01:15:53,080
Speaker 3: By that point, I had gotten into college. I d

1622
01:15:53,320 --> 01:15:56,240
Speaker 3: I dropped my baby fat, I had shaved my head,

1623
01:15:56,680 --> 01:15:59,400
Speaker 3: like I went like full tilt, like not fight club,

1624
01:15:59,439 --> 01:16:01,960
Speaker 3: but like I totally like flip my life around where

1625
01:16:02,280 --> 01:16:03,599
Speaker 3: then all of a sudden, I was working out three

1626
01:16:03,640 --> 01:16:06,160
Speaker 3: hours a day. I look the part like going in

1627
01:16:06,680 --> 01:16:09,680
Speaker 3: uh too top heavy, found that out real quick as

1628
01:16:09,720 --> 01:16:10,400
Speaker 3: far as.

1629
01:16:10,200 --> 01:16:13,040
Speaker 2: Like I see just too broad, Like yeah yeah, like

1630
01:16:13,040 --> 01:16:14,280
Speaker 2: like like a cobra. Right.

1631
01:16:14,360 --> 01:16:16,320
Speaker 3: You think bench press is the ultimate. You think all

1632
01:16:16,360 --> 01:16:18,040
Speaker 3: this stuff is the ultimate, like you know, and then

1633
01:16:18,040 --> 01:16:19,320
Speaker 3: you go to do a pull up and you have

1634
01:16:19,320 --> 01:16:21,120
Speaker 3: to pull all that weight up and they're like, oh,

1635
01:16:21,400 --> 01:16:23,880
Speaker 3: twenty is the gold standard. You're like, oh, I totally

1636
01:16:23,960 --> 01:16:26,960
Speaker 3: did this all wrong. So you back over getting really

1637
01:16:27,000 --> 01:16:28,400
Speaker 3: good at pull ups.

1638
01:16:28,880 --> 01:16:30,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm constantly working on my thighs, you know, because

1639
01:16:30,880 --> 01:16:32,640
Speaker 2: when you're punching, it's all about the hips, you know,

1640
01:16:32,680 --> 01:16:34,840
Speaker 2: you're like throwing it in there. So when you say

1641
01:16:34,840 --> 01:16:37,639
Speaker 2: squat party, I'm thinking probably different squat party. We're doing

1642
01:16:37,680 --> 01:16:41,479
Speaker 2: like at least one hundred squat thrusts, you know, squat jumped,

1643
01:16:41,520 --> 01:16:44,479
Speaker 2: you know, like depending on you know, whatever the coach says,

1644
01:16:44,520 --> 01:16:47,840
Speaker 2: of course. But oh yeah, man, you're you're great. You know.

1645
01:16:47,920 --> 01:16:50,960
Speaker 2: I hope Vahalla boys can get some traction maybe even

1646
01:16:51,000 --> 01:16:54,640
Speaker 2: to become uh not to continuously give you PTSD, but

1647
01:16:54,720 --> 01:16:57,280
Speaker 2: like a Netflix series or something like that. Is that?

1648
01:16:58,280 --> 01:16:58,760
Speaker 2: Is that right?

1649
01:16:58,880 --> 01:17:00,720
Speaker 3: Yeah? So let's let's go back for a second, because

1650
01:17:00,720 --> 01:17:02,200
Speaker 3: you asked me a question way back that I kind

1651
01:17:02,240 --> 01:17:05,120
Speaker 3: of deferred, and it was like, when did you hear drinking?

1652
01:17:05,520 --> 01:17:08,160
Speaker 2: Right? Yeah, Like I said, it's up to you to.

1653
01:17:08,080 --> 01:17:12,479
Speaker 3: Say about this. So I had put that chapter away.

1654
01:17:12,760 --> 01:17:15,160
Speaker 3: I had really just kind of put that aside. I

1655
01:17:15,160 --> 01:17:17,559
Speaker 3: had never really thought about it. If it wasn't for

1656
01:17:17,840 --> 01:17:22,360
Speaker 3: my friend the book reviewer shout out to MJ, I

1657
01:17:22,520 --> 01:17:25,000
Speaker 3: never would have really thought about it. Again, I actually

1658
01:17:25,479 --> 01:17:29,200
Speaker 3: didn't think about doing anything with it and it got

1659
01:17:29,200 --> 01:17:32,600
Speaker 3: picked up first first try, like you know, like I,

1660
01:17:32,600 --> 01:17:35,799
Speaker 3: I've tried to publish my my non mind fiction books.

1661
01:17:36,080 --> 01:17:38,800
Speaker 3: And that's it's fucking terrible, right, trying to get trying

1662
01:17:38,800 --> 01:17:41,160
Speaker 3: to get agent, trying to be it's very hard, very

1663
01:17:41,200 --> 01:17:43,920
Speaker 3: flooded market. So I was like, oh, you know, nothing's

1664
01:17:43,920 --> 01:17:45,479
Speaker 3: gonna come a bit. She only had me apply to

1665
01:17:45,600 --> 01:17:49,280
Speaker 3: one company, you know, go to this publisher, fill out

1666
01:17:49,280 --> 01:17:51,519
Speaker 3: the thing. You'll you'll get in no problem. I was like,

1667
01:17:51,560 --> 01:17:54,040
Speaker 3: there's no way, there's no way. So they asked for

1668
01:17:54,280 --> 01:17:56,360
Speaker 3: you know, they they I write out the thing. They're like, hey,

1669
01:17:56,439 --> 01:17:59,599
Speaker 3: send us one chapter. So I sent them the Night

1670
01:17:59,600 --> 01:18:01,479
Speaker 3: of a Hunt, Night Ridden a hundred times.

1671
01:18:02,160 --> 01:18:03,479
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1672
01:18:03,520 --> 01:18:07,080
Speaker 3: Within three days, I get I want the whole manuscript.

1673
01:18:07,280 --> 01:18:09,839
Speaker 3: It's a great wow, all right, give her the manuscript.

1674
01:18:09,840 --> 01:18:12,519
Speaker 3: Two weeks later you have a book deal. Oh my god,

1675
01:18:12,520 --> 01:18:16,799
Speaker 3: this is amazing. And that's when the trouble started, because

1676
01:18:16,920 --> 01:18:20,880
Speaker 3: now I have to have fine tooth comb this book

1677
01:18:21,600 --> 01:18:25,840
Speaker 3: over and over and over and over. I must have

1678
01:18:25,920 --> 01:18:30,479
Speaker 3: read that book fucking seven times, and after putting it

1679
01:18:30,520 --> 01:18:33,040
Speaker 3: away for ten years and kind of like you know,

1680
01:18:33,160 --> 01:18:35,799
Speaker 3: like impacting everything. And I knew it to avoid and stuff.

1681
01:18:36,200 --> 01:18:39,320
Speaker 3: It was like if there was a trigger to avoid,

1682
01:18:39,520 --> 01:18:42,639
Speaker 3: it was probably reading this book that many times. Wow,

1683
01:18:43,840 --> 01:18:45,880
Speaker 3: I can tell you. We'll walk get into detail. But

1684
01:18:45,960 --> 01:18:49,760
Speaker 3: that was probably the worst. Those six months leading up

1685
01:18:49,800 --> 01:18:52,200
Speaker 3: to the book getting publish for probably the worst I

1686
01:18:52,200 --> 01:18:56,800
Speaker 3: had had since my getting out. So twelve years had

1687
01:18:56,840 --> 01:18:59,400
Speaker 3: passed and I thought, oh, I'm good, you know, I

1688
01:18:59,439 --> 01:19:01,600
Speaker 3: can handle this. And my parents were actually very like

1689
01:19:02,240 --> 01:19:04,880
Speaker 3: are you sure this is the way you want to go?

1690
01:19:05,479 --> 01:19:08,600
Speaker 3: And as as a wanna be author, I would have

1691
01:19:08,680 --> 01:19:11,120
Speaker 3: sold my soul to the devil for a book deal,

1692
01:19:11,479 --> 01:19:13,160
Speaker 3: you know. So it was like I don't care what

1693
01:19:13,200 --> 01:19:15,559
Speaker 3: it is, like, sure, whatever you want, Like, let's do this.

1694
01:19:15,960 --> 01:19:18,559
Speaker 3: And then we started getting into editing, and that is

1695
01:19:18,600 --> 01:19:23,640
Speaker 3: when I started abusing. We'll say it got bad, It

1696
01:19:23,680 --> 01:19:27,920
Speaker 3: got really bad. And then it got worse. There was

1697
01:19:27,960 --> 01:19:31,000
Speaker 3: a moment that I'm still glad to be married. We'll

1698
01:19:31,000 --> 01:19:35,840
Speaker 3: say that, yeah, so bad that my wife won't even

1699
01:19:35,880 --> 01:19:39,000
Speaker 3: read this book, will not do it. Like now she's like,

1700
01:19:39,040 --> 01:19:42,160
Speaker 3: I fucking hate this book. This book is everything that

1701
01:19:42,240 --> 01:19:44,360
Speaker 3: the lat like, you know, like cause like she lived

1702
01:19:44,360 --> 01:19:47,320
Speaker 3: through the US now and I was like, it's a

1703
01:19:47,320 --> 01:19:49,519
Speaker 3: good book, and she's like I don't care, like I

1704
01:19:49,680 --> 01:19:52,479
Speaker 3: watched what it did to you for six it ate

1705
01:19:52,520 --> 01:19:55,840
Speaker 3: you alive, like and so it's funny because like we

1706
01:19:55,880 --> 01:19:57,599
Speaker 3: do these kind of things. And that's why I remember

1707
01:19:57,720 --> 01:19:59,960
Speaker 3: I asked you specifically, like, hey, what are the questions

1708
01:20:00,080 --> 01:20:02,599
Speaker 3: you were gonna ask? Because I got asked by another

1709
01:20:02,600 --> 01:20:07,960
Speaker 3: interviewer a very question point blank to the fifth question,

1710
01:20:08,120 --> 01:20:10,680
Speaker 3: and I froze and I was like I don't know

1711
01:20:10,760 --> 01:20:13,960
Speaker 3: what to do right now, and I just said, uh,

1712
01:20:14,080 --> 01:20:17,680
Speaker 3: next question, because like I couldn't go back there. And

1713
01:20:17,720 --> 01:20:21,640
Speaker 3: so for for me, like I love these interviews like

1714
01:20:21,640 --> 01:20:23,760
Speaker 3: stuff like that, but like I won't get you right

1715
01:20:23,800 --> 01:20:26,320
Speaker 3: and I won't get into detail about it.

1716
01:20:26,400 --> 01:20:28,280
Speaker 2: I didn't want to get it. I know I got

1717
01:20:28,439 --> 01:20:30,240
Speaker 2: I got gut punch questions. Bro, you want to talk,

1718
01:20:30,720 --> 01:20:34,559
Speaker 2: you don't hold me back. It's in the book.

1719
01:20:34,840 --> 01:20:38,599
Speaker 3: It sends me off the deep end. And for six months,

1720
01:20:38,640 --> 01:20:41,679
Speaker 3: my wife hurt, Like my wife couldn't couldn't cope because

1721
01:20:41,960 --> 01:20:44,840
Speaker 3: there I am saying I'm fine, and I I did

1722
01:20:44,880 --> 01:20:47,160
Speaker 3: go back to therapy. I checked in. I started going

1723
01:20:47,200 --> 01:20:49,479
Speaker 3: back once a week, and even she was like, you're

1724
01:20:49,520 --> 01:20:52,400
Speaker 3: not fine, like you need to stop. But I had

1725
01:20:52,439 --> 01:20:55,040
Speaker 3: already signed i'd already the deal was made, and so

1726
01:20:55,240 --> 01:20:58,040
Speaker 3: like the I think the best day, the best day

1727
01:20:58,080 --> 01:21:00,960
Speaker 3: for me was when the book finally came out and

1728
01:21:01,040 --> 01:21:03,360
Speaker 3: I never had to look at it again. It was like, no,

1729
01:21:03,600 --> 01:21:07,880
Speaker 3: go run free. And so they're they're talking about they're

1730
01:21:07,880 --> 01:21:10,080
Speaker 3: actually talking about audio rights now for the book, which

1731
01:21:10,120 --> 01:21:13,320
Speaker 3: would be and I want no part because I was like,

1732
01:21:13,360 --> 01:21:16,080
Speaker 3: oh you should read it. It's like absolutely no, there's

1733
01:21:16,160 --> 01:21:19,240
Speaker 3: no way that I will read this book out loud ever,

1734
01:21:19,479 --> 01:21:21,479
Speaker 3: like there's no quote, Like even if they asked me

1735
01:21:21,520 --> 01:21:23,160
Speaker 3: to and pain me, I still wouldn't do it.

1736
01:21:23,240 --> 01:21:24,920
Speaker 2: And even there's a lot of folks like you that

1737
01:21:25,000 --> 01:21:29,160
Speaker 2: don't want that. That's why there is actor readers that

1738
01:21:29,240 --> 01:21:31,719
Speaker 2: can come in and read the book, right, and so.

1739
01:21:31,800 --> 01:21:34,080
Speaker 3: Like, yeah, I would love, I would love. I guess

1740
01:21:34,120 --> 01:21:36,439
Speaker 3: for me, I would love for this book to give

1741
01:21:36,479 --> 01:21:39,519
Speaker 3: me some financial security, you know, like you know so

1742
01:21:39,760 --> 01:21:42,120
Speaker 3: helped me. Like but as far as like the like

1743
01:21:43,120 --> 01:21:44,840
Speaker 3: I never wanted to be famous for this. I never

1744
01:21:44,840 --> 01:21:46,639
Speaker 3: wanted to be like this was not the thing, Like

1745
01:21:46,880 --> 01:21:48,880
Speaker 3: this is not my legacy, Like I have another book

1746
01:21:48,920 --> 01:21:51,160
Speaker 3: series that I put my heart and soul to that

1747
01:21:51,320 --> 01:21:55,960
Speaker 3: actually believe it or not, it's based on Iraq, and

1748
01:21:56,000 --> 01:22:00,280
Speaker 3: it's a fantasy series callowing some mercenaries and it's like lightheartedness.

1749
01:22:01,360 --> 01:22:03,640
Speaker 3: There is some like you know, PTC and stuff, and

1750
01:22:03,680 --> 01:22:08,120
Speaker 3: so I made a new world over here from my experiences,

1751
01:22:08,240 --> 01:22:11,000
Speaker 3: but it's almost my coping mechanism and so this makes

1752
01:22:11,040 --> 01:22:13,880
Speaker 3: me feel better. Where this book is just like if

1753
01:22:13,920 --> 01:22:15,799
Speaker 3: they were like, hey, we're gonna do a movie deal tomorrow,

1754
01:22:15,840 --> 01:22:18,800
Speaker 3: it's like, great, I will never watch that movie. Like yeah,

1755
01:22:18,840 --> 01:22:22,400
Speaker 3: I don't ask the career like, don't ask me, like

1756
01:22:22,840 --> 01:22:23,920
Speaker 3: you have my blessed.

1757
01:22:23,760 --> 01:22:26,040
Speaker 2: Like the journal you have, it's like it's just put away.

1758
01:22:26,200 --> 01:22:27,680
Speaker 2: I didn't want to look at that, and she just

1759
01:22:27,680 --> 01:22:29,280
Speaker 2: put away. You know, you know what's in it you

1760
01:22:29,320 --> 01:22:31,040
Speaker 2: can go back to and say, oh, I know what

1761
01:22:31,080 --> 01:22:31,400
Speaker 2: I wrote.

1762
01:22:31,400 --> 01:22:34,400
Speaker 3: Crash. I actually like because I had we had had

1763
01:22:34,439 --> 01:22:37,160
Speaker 3: to move something. And I went through I had books

1764
01:22:37,160 --> 01:22:39,479
Speaker 3: of poetry. I write poetry too, I write all kinds

1765
01:22:39,479 --> 01:22:42,439
Speaker 3: of so I I have layers of like medi composition

1766
01:22:42,520 --> 01:22:43,960
Speaker 3: journals of just all this stuff. And I had to

1767
01:22:43,960 --> 01:22:46,960
Speaker 3: find a specific book that I wanted to put in

1768
01:22:47,320 --> 01:22:50,160
Speaker 3: to word format. And I found it and I was

1769
01:22:50,200 --> 01:22:52,679
Speaker 3: like what is this? And I started reading it. My

1770
01:22:52,320 --> 01:22:55,640
Speaker 3: my wife was beside me, and she's like, no, nope, no,

1771
01:22:55,760 --> 01:22:58,760
Speaker 3: put it right now. And I and I checked on

1772
01:22:58,760 --> 01:23:01,200
Speaker 3: one fact and it was the fist if you guys

1773
01:23:01,200 --> 01:23:04,040
Speaker 3: read the book while hollaboys in the leg and I

1774
01:23:04,080 --> 01:23:07,439
Speaker 3: was like, all right, it was good. I was right, okay,

1775
01:23:07,640 --> 01:23:09,360
Speaker 3: I remember that. And I threw the book away and

1776
01:23:09,360 --> 01:23:11,720
Speaker 3: I was like, I'm done. This book is over with,

1777
01:23:12,240 --> 01:23:14,439
Speaker 3: so again, like I really hope it's a weird thing

1778
01:23:14,479 --> 01:23:18,680
Speaker 3: because I hope for success, but I don't care and

1779
01:23:18,760 --> 01:23:21,080
Speaker 3: I'm done with that, Like that's not something I want

1780
01:23:21,120 --> 01:23:21,680
Speaker 3: to ever, Like.

1781
01:23:22,520 --> 01:23:25,599
Speaker 2: You've accomplished the therapy request, right.

1782
01:23:25,760 --> 01:23:28,240
Speaker 3: Yep, it's all. It's all nothing that's good. I love it.

1783
01:23:28,400 --> 01:23:31,080
Speaker 3: I think it's And it's funny because the reviews are

1784
01:23:31,240 --> 01:23:36,400
Speaker 3: very polarizing because again, I give what I consider a

1785
01:23:36,520 --> 01:23:42,600
Speaker 3: very raw, unfiltered, accurate of what I was going through.

1786
01:23:43,080 --> 01:23:45,360
Speaker 3: Does it sound I'm not trying to make myself sound

1787
01:23:45,400 --> 01:23:47,679
Speaker 3: good if you read the book, like I'm not sure,

1788
01:23:48,040 --> 01:23:49,800
Speaker 3: like I'm not trying to sugarcoat shit and be like

1789
01:23:49,800 --> 01:23:52,559
Speaker 3: oh what I was like there was so much rage

1790
01:23:52,680 --> 01:23:54,880
Speaker 3: and anger and like you don't know where to put it,

1791
01:23:54,920 --> 01:23:57,680
Speaker 3: and like you have these thoughts that like and I

1792
01:23:58,000 --> 01:24:00,439
Speaker 3: know guys who have PTSD now that we talk about that,

1793
01:24:00,960 --> 01:24:04,120
Speaker 3: like the red rage that comes on when somebody, like

1794
01:24:04,160 --> 01:24:05,880
Speaker 3: you're standing in line at the coffee shop and some

1795
01:24:06,000 --> 01:24:09,559
Speaker 3: dude fucking is rude to you and boom, you are

1796
01:24:09,800 --> 01:24:12,439
Speaker 3: just like off the chart and it makes no sense.

1797
01:24:12,880 --> 01:24:14,960
Speaker 3: But it's just you have nowhere to put this rage

1798
01:24:15,000 --> 01:24:17,760
Speaker 3: sometimes in these feelings. And like again, like you said,

1799
01:24:17,840 --> 01:24:19,840
Speaker 3: like we're told not to say anything. We're told not

1800
01:24:19,960 --> 01:24:23,599
Speaker 3: to you know, especially while you're in Yeah, and so

1801
01:24:23,640 --> 01:24:26,439
Speaker 3: you you internalize it and when it comes out it's

1802
01:24:26,479 --> 01:24:32,600
Speaker 3: never when you want. It's never just and so like

1803
01:24:33,880 --> 01:24:36,360
Speaker 3: it yeah, and so like you just you just you're

1804
01:24:36,360 --> 01:24:38,720
Speaker 3: you're trying to find ways to like put it out

1805
01:24:38,720 --> 01:24:41,439
Speaker 3: there and get it. But like, man, I've I've had

1806
01:24:41,479 --> 01:24:45,400
Speaker 3: moments where I freaked out at like random stuff we're

1807
01:24:45,560 --> 01:24:47,559
Speaker 3: in the public, and like you realize and like this

1808
01:24:47,600 --> 01:24:50,880
Speaker 3: is where like I think the the lonely veteran thing

1809
01:24:51,000 --> 01:24:55,360
Speaker 3: comes into play, where I find it easier to shrink

1810
01:24:55,479 --> 01:24:58,640
Speaker 3: my world down to a couple of people. And you know,

1811
01:24:58,720 --> 01:25:01,160
Speaker 3: like because like it talks to be out in the

1812
01:25:01,160 --> 01:25:03,000
Speaker 3: world and all of a sudden you feel this rage

1813
01:25:03,120 --> 01:25:05,160
Speaker 3: or you just start crying because you know something happened.

1814
01:25:05,160 --> 01:25:06,880
Speaker 3: You're just like, I don't know how to fucking cope

1815
01:25:06,880 --> 01:25:09,080
Speaker 3: with this, like and so like, writing for me has

1816
01:25:09,120 --> 01:25:12,479
Speaker 3: been that really great outlet where I can do it

1817
01:25:12,520 --> 01:25:15,120
Speaker 3: at home. I'm my own boss. I'm you know, sitting

1818
01:25:15,120 --> 01:25:16,000
Speaker 3: here and stuff like that.

1819
01:25:16,120 --> 01:25:19,479
Speaker 2: So you remind me of the dude in Sublime right

1820
01:25:19,520 --> 01:25:21,439
Speaker 2: now the sun. You know the band Sublime?

1821
01:25:21,520 --> 01:25:23,640
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, oh yeah, I grew up on that.

1822
01:25:24,200 --> 01:25:26,360
Speaker 2: You know, his son has to play all of his

1823
01:25:26,439 --> 01:25:29,439
Speaker 2: dad's songs in the band. And he's like, you guys

1824
01:25:29,479 --> 01:25:31,840
Speaker 2: all think it's cool, but I have to always listen

1825
01:25:31,840 --> 01:25:34,280
Speaker 2: to my dad. I have to always listen to his voice.

1826
01:25:34,439 --> 01:25:36,719
Speaker 2: I have to always replay it. I have to always

1827
01:25:36,720 --> 01:25:40,880
Speaker 2: be exactly like him. He's like, I'm it's like this

1828
01:25:42,000 --> 01:25:43,040
Speaker 2: double edged sword.

1829
01:25:42,760 --> 01:25:44,640
Speaker 3: Bro, and that and that's what it is. And I

1830
01:25:44,680 --> 01:25:47,680
Speaker 3: really I think this is one of my best written pieces.

1831
01:25:47,720 --> 01:25:49,519
Speaker 3: Like I really took my time with it. This was

1832
01:25:49,520 --> 01:25:52,200
Speaker 3: written over years, Like this wasn't like a sit down

1833
01:25:52,240 --> 01:25:55,960
Speaker 3: and write it, and the editing crew did a phenomenal

1834
01:25:56,040 --> 01:25:59,040
Speaker 3: job with it. It was actually ordered different than the

1835
01:25:59,040 --> 01:26:02,280
Speaker 3: way you read it. It was like funny story, bad story.

1836
01:26:02,280 --> 01:26:04,920
Speaker 3: Funny story bad story and they're like no, no, no, no,

1837
01:26:05,160 --> 01:26:08,000
Speaker 3: we're gonna gut punch them. So it's like funny story

1838
01:26:08,320 --> 01:26:10,679
Speaker 3: and then the roller coaster just pulls and like they're

1839
01:26:10,720 --> 01:26:12,760
Speaker 3: like and so like even the way I wrote it

1840
01:26:12,800 --> 01:26:14,680
Speaker 3: was never meant to be like that, but like you know,

1841
01:26:14,680 --> 01:26:16,040
Speaker 3: you put it in the hands of a publisher and

1842
01:26:16,120 --> 01:26:18,160
Speaker 3: it's just like they edited, like they made it a

1843
01:26:18,240 --> 01:26:20,719
Speaker 3: gem and I'm really proud of it. But some people,

1844
01:26:20,880 --> 01:26:24,680
Speaker 3: like people like just they don't understand, like you're a

1845
01:26:24,720 --> 01:26:27,719
Speaker 3: bad person, okay, Like I'm sorry, man.

1846
01:26:27,640 --> 01:26:33,040
Speaker 2: Like I guess that's what you think. Yeah, I read today, right, And.

1847
01:26:33,080 --> 01:26:35,080
Speaker 3: That's that's kind of the funny thing because I've actually

1848
01:26:35,160 --> 01:26:39,160
Speaker 3: had this awesome feedback from a lot of vets, so like, uh,

1849
01:26:39,439 --> 01:26:41,400
Speaker 3: if you do read the book, please give me a

1850
01:26:41,439 --> 01:26:43,559
Speaker 3: review on Amazon, because that's how the book actually goes

1851
01:26:43,640 --> 01:26:46,599
Speaker 3: viral and actually grows. But don't feel like I've had

1852
01:26:46,600 --> 01:26:49,840
Speaker 3: actually a lot of vets email me direct because it's

1853
01:26:49,840 --> 01:26:51,320
Speaker 3: it's it's on the back of the book like you

1854
01:26:51,320 --> 01:26:54,760
Speaker 3: can and be like, hey man, that was it. That

1855
01:26:54,960 --> 01:26:58,680
Speaker 3: was exactly what I felt and feel, and thank you

1856
01:26:58,720 --> 01:27:01,200
Speaker 3: for making it. And that means the world's to me,

1857
01:27:01,600 --> 01:27:04,360
Speaker 3: Like that that that to me has been just the

1858
01:27:04,479 --> 01:27:04,880
Speaker 3: thing that.

1859
01:27:04,760 --> 01:27:05,559
Speaker 2: Makes the chills.

1860
01:27:05,720 --> 01:27:09,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, like good, I'm glad I got to capture that

1861
01:27:10,840 --> 01:27:12,840
Speaker 3: because a lot of like like Tim O'Brien's The Things

1862
01:27:12,840 --> 01:27:15,880
Speaker 3: they Carried for Vietnam, and you look at these certain

1863
01:27:15,880 --> 01:27:17,800
Speaker 3: books that go back in time and you're like, I

1864
01:27:17,840 --> 01:27:20,120
Speaker 3: hope I captured in the way that he captured it,

1865
01:27:20,560 --> 01:27:22,479
Speaker 3: like the same kind of feelings and the same kind

1866
01:27:22,560 --> 01:27:26,800
Speaker 3: of thing where you can you can live that story

1867
01:27:26,880 --> 01:27:29,000
Speaker 3: without being there. You can kind of put yourself in

1868
01:27:29,040 --> 01:27:31,040
Speaker 3: that position. And that's what I think is like people

1869
01:27:31,160 --> 01:27:34,040
Speaker 3: like if you've never been in that position, because I

1870
01:27:34,040 --> 01:27:37,040
Speaker 3: think I talk about like at one point, like if

1871
01:27:37,080 --> 01:27:38,800
Speaker 3: I was put in a situation again, I would take

1872
01:27:38,840 --> 01:27:40,799
Speaker 3: it a shot that I didn't take in the book.

1873
01:27:41,320 --> 01:27:41,519
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1874
01:27:41,920 --> 01:27:43,599
Speaker 3: I had a girl writing and she's like, how could

1875
01:27:43,600 --> 01:27:45,360
Speaker 3: you say that? And I was like, I'm not trying

1876
01:27:45,360 --> 01:27:47,439
Speaker 3: to be mean, And it wasn't like a I'm not

1877
01:27:47,479 --> 01:27:51,160
Speaker 3: an aggressive person. But if your friends are on the

1878
01:27:51,240 --> 01:27:55,320
Speaker 3: line and it's between not and do, like you, you

1879
01:27:55,360 --> 01:27:57,120
Speaker 3: were lucky. You don't live in a world where that

1880
01:27:57,320 --> 01:28:00,400
Speaker 3: is a choice you have to make, because there's time

1881
01:28:00,760 --> 01:28:03,799
Speaker 3: eighteen and nineteen year old you know, men and women

1882
01:28:04,160 --> 01:28:08,599
Speaker 3: in god forsaken places having to make those choices daily,

1883
01:28:09,160 --> 01:28:12,559
Speaker 3: and people just sit back and Monday morning quarterback, and

1884
01:28:12,600 --> 01:28:15,040
Speaker 3: you're just like, I don't even know how you begin

1885
01:28:15,240 --> 01:28:18,599
Speaker 3: to judge these people when if you saw a quarter

1886
01:28:18,640 --> 01:28:19,760
Speaker 3: of what then that you would have you would have

1887
01:28:19,800 --> 01:28:22,040
Speaker 3: shut down long ago. And they have to get up

1888
01:28:22,080 --> 01:28:25,400
Speaker 3: and do it every day, cops, firefighters, like this is

1889
01:28:25,800 --> 01:28:28,640
Speaker 3: the military. There's there's people every day dealing with absolute

1890
01:28:28,760 --> 01:28:32,200
Speaker 3: trauma who have do it again. And then you could

1891
01:28:32,439 --> 01:28:34,400
Speaker 3: like and people are like, he should have made a

1892
01:28:34,400 --> 01:28:35,920
Speaker 3: better choice.

1893
01:28:36,880 --> 01:28:42,000
Speaker 2: Like a nurse, Okay, get ready for that. Every single day.

1894
01:28:42,160 --> 01:28:43,840
Speaker 3: I actually had an hear a nurse girlfriend, believe it

1895
01:28:43,960 --> 01:28:46,599
Speaker 3: or not, in between my wife and she would tell

1896
01:28:46,640 --> 01:28:49,120
Speaker 3: me stories and I was like, I've been through some shit.

1897
01:28:49,560 --> 01:28:51,880
Speaker 3: I don't know how you do your job at all.

1898
01:28:52,200 --> 01:28:54,160
Speaker 3: I could never do that to get up every day,

1899
01:28:54,200 --> 01:28:56,800
Speaker 3: and she would and I had to be at one

1900
01:28:56,800 --> 01:29:00,800
Speaker 3: point her her release vowel where she would be sitting

1901
01:29:00,800 --> 01:29:03,040
Speaker 3: in the shower and she'd tell me stories. And one

1902
01:29:03,320 --> 01:29:04,960
Speaker 3: I was like, Okay, this story has to stop. No,

1903
01:29:05,160 --> 01:29:07,840
Speaker 3: not that story either, Like you start She's like, oh

1904
01:29:07,880 --> 01:29:09,800
Speaker 3: in this baby, I was like, we're absolutely not talking

1905
01:29:09,800 --> 01:29:13,400
Speaker 3: about that, Like sorry, Like I how they get that

1906
01:29:13,520 --> 01:29:16,400
Speaker 3: up every day and do that is absolutely absurd to me.

1907
01:29:16,439 --> 01:29:19,439
Speaker 3: And God bless those men and women who are amazing, amazing,

1908
01:29:19,680 --> 01:29:21,360
Speaker 3: amazing people across the board.

1909
01:29:21,720 --> 01:29:23,439
Speaker 2: And all of our troops and all of our marines.

1910
01:29:23,760 --> 01:29:25,439
Speaker 2: Let's just throw them all in there, Okay, God bless

1911
01:29:25,479 --> 01:29:26,960
Speaker 2: you every.

1912
01:29:26,760 --> 01:29:29,880
Speaker 3: Home frontliners, everyone who has to deal with trauma on

1913
01:29:29,920 --> 01:29:32,200
Speaker 3: a daily and then get up and do it again,

1914
01:29:32,320 --> 01:29:34,680
Speaker 3: because most people deal with one trauma and then they're

1915
01:29:34,720 --> 01:29:37,080
Speaker 3: over it, and then to get up and do it

1916
01:29:37,080 --> 01:29:39,680
Speaker 3: again is what makes you that warrior, that makes you

1917
01:29:39,800 --> 01:29:41,200
Speaker 3: that person that you're staying.

1918
01:29:41,080 --> 01:29:43,320
Speaker 2: To not be jaded. Yeah, I just still have empathy.

1919
01:29:43,560 --> 01:29:46,160
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, you start reading, Like, dude, I don't know

1920
01:29:46,160 --> 01:29:47,720
Speaker 3: if you if you're into World War two, but I

1921
01:29:48,240 --> 01:29:50,000
Speaker 3: love World War two and the history and stuff like that.

1922
01:29:50,080 --> 01:29:53,400
Speaker 3: And like they talk about the Australians literally making jokes

1923
01:29:53,439 --> 01:29:55,439
Speaker 3: as they're getting hit with mortar fire and half their

1924
01:29:55,439 --> 01:29:58,240
Speaker 3: platoon and you're just like the mindset of that people

1925
01:29:58,240 --> 01:30:00,559
Speaker 3: are like it's wild to think that there are you know,

1926
01:30:00,640 --> 01:30:02,840
Speaker 3: and that's what we're talking about, the indomitable spirit where

1927
01:30:03,160 --> 01:30:05,439
Speaker 3: you know, they're still making jokes. As they're guys because

1928
01:30:05,439 --> 01:30:07,400
Speaker 3: there's nothing else to do. And that's the prey.

1929
01:30:07,920 --> 01:30:09,920
Speaker 2: They had a Christmas moment in World War two where

1930
01:30:09,920 --> 01:30:12,320
Speaker 2: it was quiet. Yeah you know, I mean you know

1931
01:30:12,600 --> 01:30:16,320
Speaker 2: that's the that's that same type of spirit that it's

1932
01:30:16,360 --> 01:30:17,400
Speaker 2: like we can stop the war.

1933
01:30:17,560 --> 01:30:20,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, that was I mean I love that story too.

1934
01:30:20,360 --> 01:30:21,519
Speaker 3: That's there's some good stuff.

1935
01:30:21,680 --> 01:30:23,200
Speaker 2: But no, I just I think I love you. I

1936
01:30:23,880 --> 01:30:27,439
Speaker 2: think that another man can love another man. Yeah, and

1937
01:30:27,640 --> 01:30:27,920
Speaker 2: give me.

1938
01:30:29,680 --> 01:30:32,120
Speaker 3: Until the military. Could you have high school friends And

1939
01:30:32,160 --> 01:30:33,760
Speaker 3: this is for everyone listening, Like if you have high

1940
01:30:33,760 --> 01:30:36,240
Speaker 3: school friends and you have college friends and you're like, oh,

1941
01:30:36,240 --> 01:30:38,439
Speaker 3: I grew up with this person and I love them.

1942
01:30:38,560 --> 01:30:41,360
Speaker 3: You know, they're my best friend, you will never have

1943
01:30:41,880 --> 01:30:45,720
Speaker 3: relationships like you do in the military or in the

1944
01:30:46,280 --> 01:30:51,560
Speaker 3: if you share that real trauma together like your a nurse, firefighter, firefighter.

1945
01:30:51,080 --> 01:30:52,000
Speaker 2: Coss trauma bonding.

1946
01:30:52,120 --> 01:30:55,559
Speaker 3: Trauma bonding is like like suddenly e've known each other

1947
01:30:55,600 --> 01:30:58,439
Speaker 3: for six months and you are it's felt like you've

1948
01:30:58,479 --> 01:31:02,120
Speaker 3: never shared a wound. And then that like that that

1949
01:31:02,120 --> 01:31:03,800
Speaker 3: that is the most amazing part of it is like

1950
01:31:03,840 --> 01:31:07,120
Speaker 3: you truly become this like really tight knit group where

1951
01:31:07,160 --> 01:31:09,320
Speaker 3: like you guys live together eat together, shit together, like

1952
01:31:09,360 --> 01:31:12,800
Speaker 3: and you do literally everything together for years and you

1953
01:31:12,840 --> 01:31:15,120
Speaker 3: share all this trauma and you know each other inside

1954
01:31:15,120 --> 01:31:18,280
Speaker 3: and out and like and there's no friendship like that.

1955
01:31:18,439 --> 01:31:20,639
Speaker 3: Like and again you like you're in college, you go home,

1956
01:31:20,720 --> 01:31:23,600
Speaker 3: you see them want to like the people don't understand

1957
01:31:23,680 --> 01:31:26,080
Speaker 3: the and so they don't understand. I think they're watching

1958
01:31:26,080 --> 01:31:28,559
Speaker 3: your friends get hurt because they're you know, my high

1959
01:31:28,560 --> 01:31:32,240
Speaker 3: school friend like, oh yeah, whatever you no, No, it's

1960
01:31:32,240 --> 01:31:34,679
Speaker 3: not it's your brother, it's your sister, it's your mom,

1961
01:31:34,720 --> 01:31:37,479
Speaker 3: it's your dad. You know, these are people that you love,

1962
01:31:37,760 --> 01:31:40,479
Speaker 3: like you said tlotonically, more than maybe your family. And

1963
01:31:40,520 --> 01:31:42,080
Speaker 3: in fact, in some cases of a lot of the

1964
01:31:42,080 --> 01:31:44,439
Speaker 3: guys I met, it was more than family because their

1965
01:31:44,439 --> 01:31:47,840
Speaker 3: family were not the best places and that's the military.

1966
01:31:48,240 --> 01:31:50,400
Speaker 3: And now they have this brotherhood and they have this

1967
01:31:50,640 --> 01:31:51,880
Speaker 3: you know, like this family.

1968
01:31:52,080 --> 01:31:54,040
Speaker 2: Was yelling at them and putting them in the ground.

1969
01:31:54,040 --> 01:31:57,240
Speaker 2: But they're like, you love me like that? Right? Oh my,

1970
01:31:57,680 --> 01:31:59,559
Speaker 2: They're like, why are you not broken? Oh you're giving

1971
01:31:59,560 --> 01:32:00,000
Speaker 2: me attention?

1972
01:32:00,280 --> 01:32:04,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, Like it was wild because I was I was

1973
01:32:04,280 --> 01:32:07,240
Speaker 3: an older guy going in because I'd been through college,

1974
01:32:07,240 --> 01:32:09,280
Speaker 3: so I wasn't Yeah, I had left home I had

1975
01:32:09,360 --> 01:32:11,799
Speaker 3: lived on my own for four years, not quite homesick,

1976
01:32:11,920 --> 01:32:13,880
Speaker 3: You're right, and so like I got to watch boot

1977
01:32:13,920 --> 01:32:17,160
Speaker 3: Camp as this kind of like outward like experiment, where

1978
01:32:17,280 --> 01:32:19,640
Speaker 3: like it was wild to watch dudes who had never

1979
01:32:19,720 --> 01:32:23,640
Speaker 3: left home, never never experienced anything, be broken down and

1980
01:32:23,720 --> 01:32:26,040
Speaker 3: like how they build them back up and like that

1981
01:32:26,160 --> 01:32:28,640
Speaker 3: love there. We had guys who would kill for our

1982
01:32:28,680 --> 01:32:31,280
Speaker 3: senior drill instructor by the end just like said, like

1983
01:32:31,560 --> 01:32:33,840
Speaker 3: you do, ready to go for He was dad to them,

1984
01:32:34,040 --> 01:32:36,080
Speaker 3: and they loved him and he loved them, And like,

1985
01:32:36,479 --> 01:32:38,320
Speaker 3: I think they had better relationships with a guy they

1986
01:32:38,360 --> 01:32:41,000
Speaker 3: met for twelve weeks than any other family member they

1987
01:32:41,040 --> 01:32:43,120
Speaker 3: might have ever had. And they truly if he said

1988
01:32:43,160 --> 01:32:45,280
Speaker 3: run into that wall into your head breaks would have

1989
01:32:45,320 --> 01:32:46,799
Speaker 3: done it no problem and done it no problem.

1990
01:32:46,880 --> 01:32:50,200
Speaker 2: Vahalla boys all day, every day. Bro. That is the book.

1991
01:32:50,680 --> 01:32:52,960
Speaker 2: That is the book that you should go check out.

1992
01:32:53,520 --> 01:32:56,240
Speaker 2: This has been one of the best conversations I've had

1993
01:32:56,280 --> 01:32:58,639
Speaker 2: on my show. You're so easy to talk to. Dude.

1994
01:32:58,640 --> 01:33:01,320
Speaker 2: We've been going for like an hour thirty and if

1995
01:33:01,360 --> 01:33:03,280
Speaker 2: my listener has listened this whole time, I hope we've

1996
01:33:03,360 --> 01:33:05,840
Speaker 2: enjoyed it as much as I have. And I could

1997
01:33:06,040 --> 01:33:07,920
Speaker 2: gut punch you with some questions and I could ask

1998
01:33:07,960 --> 01:33:10,479
Speaker 2: some really demented things, but I want them to read

1999
01:33:10,479 --> 01:33:13,360
Speaker 2: the book and see what you put in that book.

2000
01:33:13,520 --> 01:33:17,160
Speaker 2: So go check out The Valhalla Boys. Okay, written by

2001
01:33:17,479 --> 01:33:22,880
Speaker 2: Brennan Morton, the man right here, recon Sniper, silent swift, deadly,

2002
01:33:23,000 --> 01:33:31,840
Speaker 2: three Holes in the Skull, Okay, gym owner, father, husband, son, Okay, educator, teacher. Dude,

2003
01:33:31,840 --> 01:33:34,439
Speaker 2: you're great okay, And I hope success comes your way.

2004
01:33:34,479 --> 01:33:36,439
Speaker 2: And you know, you could totally be in a band

2005
01:33:36,479 --> 01:33:38,280
Speaker 2: and keep writing your poems and submit them like Taylor

2006
01:33:38,280 --> 01:33:41,360
Speaker 2: Swift to artists have them become songs, you know. I mean,

2007
01:33:41,479 --> 01:33:43,200
Speaker 2: that's another outlet for you, bro, if you got a

2008
01:33:43,200 --> 01:33:48,200
Speaker 2: stack of poems because you're poetic and theater kid, skater kid,

2009
01:33:48,680 --> 01:33:50,400
Speaker 2: you know what I'm saying. So I just want to

2010
01:33:50,400 --> 01:33:52,760
Speaker 2: say thank you. I've had you for so much time,

2011
01:33:52,800 --> 01:33:54,759
Speaker 2: and I know other people want you, but you're welcome

2012
01:33:54,800 --> 01:33:57,320
Speaker 2: back on the show anytime that you want to come back.

2013
01:33:57,360 --> 01:34:00,439
Speaker 2: And dude, I would be totally happy to have you

2014
01:34:00,479 --> 01:34:02,880
Speaker 2: in my circle of influence. So thank you so much.

2015
01:34:03,000 --> 01:34:03,280
Speaker 3: Thank you.

2016
01:34:03,560 --> 01:34:05,639
Speaker 2: If you have anything to say, I'll let you. Yeah,

2017
01:34:05,800 --> 01:34:07,960
Speaker 2: go ahead, check out my book Valhalla Boys.

2018
01:34:08,000 --> 01:34:12,000
Speaker 3: And if you are at all interested in fantasy, Company

2019
01:34:12,000 --> 01:34:15,559
Speaker 3: of Bones has another book coming out soon. It's uh

2020
01:34:16,080 --> 01:34:19,720
Speaker 3: called it a military based fantasy. It's how I took

2021
01:34:19,720 --> 01:34:23,519
Speaker 3: a lot of my PTSD, a lot of my angst

2022
01:34:23,640 --> 01:34:25,680
Speaker 3: and stuff like that, and I put it into a

2023
01:34:25,720 --> 01:34:30,439
Speaker 3: low magic fantasy world of like mercenaries and free companies

2024
01:34:30,439 --> 01:34:33,679
Speaker 3: and stuff like that. It's gotten great reviews. We're doing really.

2025
01:34:33,479 --> 01:34:35,040
Speaker 2: Well with it. It's called Company of Bones.

2026
01:34:35,479 --> 01:34:37,160
Speaker 3: Of Bones is the first book. We're coming out with

2027
01:34:37,120 --> 01:34:39,599
Speaker 3: the second book soon. It's going to be about probably

2028
01:34:39,600 --> 01:34:41,960
Speaker 3: ten to twelve book series, like Wheel of Time.

2029
01:34:42,000 --> 01:34:43,519
Speaker 2: Publisher Yeah no.

2030
01:34:43,439 --> 01:34:46,160
Speaker 3: Actually different publisher, Paladin Prep. You got picked up a

2031
01:34:46,400 --> 01:34:49,519
Speaker 3: publisher for this one little little boutique once. It's been awesome.

2032
01:34:50,479 --> 01:34:52,599
Speaker 3: But yeah, so it's it's been going awesome. But if

2033
01:34:52,640 --> 01:34:54,640
Speaker 3: you're at all like and actually, I've had a lot

2034
01:34:54,680 --> 01:34:57,240
Speaker 3: of military guys who read Valhalla Boys and went over

2035
01:34:57,320 --> 01:34:59,280
Speaker 3: to the They're like, you know what, I don't like fantasy,

2036
01:34:59,360 --> 01:35:02,280
Speaker 3: but this was awesome, very funny, very like because I

2037
01:35:02,320 --> 01:35:04,160
Speaker 3: hate to say, it's written by a military guy, so

2038
01:35:04,200 --> 01:35:06,760
Speaker 3: it's not cheesy. It's not the normal fans.

2039
01:35:06,760 --> 01:35:08,360
Speaker 2: It could be a little bit more detail oriented. I

2040
01:35:08,400 --> 01:35:09,439
Speaker 2: like that. I think I like it.

2041
01:35:09,439 --> 01:35:12,200
Speaker 3: It's also human oriented. There's there's you know, there's some

2042
01:35:12,240 --> 01:35:15,320
Speaker 3: other characters, but it's it's about humanity and it's about

2043
01:35:15,400 --> 01:35:18,280
Speaker 3: my experience with death, with war, with you know, it's

2044
01:35:18,320 --> 01:35:21,360
Speaker 3: my thoughts on that. So it comes off as kind

2045
01:35:21,360 --> 01:35:22,920
Speaker 3: of a different breed of that kind of stuff. So

2046
01:35:23,000 --> 01:35:25,120
Speaker 3: it's been going really well. I hope it goes better.

2047
01:35:25,920 --> 01:35:28,759
Speaker 2: So Company of Bones is out there, and then Valhalla

2048
01:35:28,840 --> 01:35:30,760
Speaker 2: Boys is the book that we want you to go

2049
01:35:30,840 --> 01:35:33,160
Speaker 2: check out right now. And you know, if you have

2050
01:35:33,200 --> 01:35:35,679
Speaker 2: any questions, email him when you get the book, because

2051
01:35:35,680 --> 01:35:38,320
Speaker 2: it's on the back of the book. Yep. Okay, simple

2052
01:35:38,600 --> 01:35:42,439
Speaker 2: and on behalf of myself and my guest Brennan and

2053
01:35:42,479 --> 01:35:45,000
Speaker 2: Brandon Webb who runs the site and it does so much,

2054
01:35:45,080 --> 01:35:47,320
Speaker 2: and my producer Callum who puts us all together. At

2055
01:35:47,320 --> 01:35:48,880
Speaker 2: the end of the day, I just want to say

2056
01:35:48,880 --> 01:35:51,200
Speaker 2: thank you for watching us and being a part of

2057
01:35:51,240 --> 01:35:53,880
Speaker 2: my life, and thank you dude for stepping up to

2058
01:35:54,280 --> 01:35:57,360
Speaker 2: come on my show and me and we went for

2059
01:35:57,400 --> 01:35:59,240
Speaker 2: an hour thirty five. I think you're my longest one

2060
01:35:59,280 --> 01:36:01,799
Speaker 2: so far. And keep going because it's like, come play Nintendo,

2061
01:36:02,120 --> 01:36:02,599
Speaker 2: come on over.

2062
01:36:02,880 --> 01:36:03,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, you.

2063
01:36:06,000 --> 01:36:08,240
Speaker 2: See that's there. It is. See. We gotta I gotta

2064
01:36:08,280 --> 01:36:10,400
Speaker 2: call the show. I gotta say otherwise we're gonna start

2065
01:36:10,439 --> 01:36:13,040
Speaker 2: doing up, updown, down, left, right, be a select start, okay.

2066
01:36:13,600 --> 01:36:17,840
Speaker 2: So contra all day. You're great, and and I wish

2067
01:36:17,840 --> 01:36:20,720
Speaker 2: you many blessings in whatever faith that you believe in.

2068
01:36:21,120 --> 01:36:24,200
Speaker 2: And and to you out there that is thinking about

2069
01:36:24,240 --> 01:36:26,280
Speaker 2: popping a bunch of pills and drinking a bunch of stuff,

2070
01:36:26,760 --> 01:36:29,599
Speaker 2: try some thrills before you try those pills, and go

2071
01:36:29,640 --> 01:36:32,280
Speaker 2: to the gym. Go work out, Go snowboard, go ski,

2072
01:36:32,439 --> 01:36:34,200
Speaker 2: Go walk your dog. If you don't got a dog,

2073
01:36:34,240 --> 01:36:37,160
Speaker 2: we'll get a dog. Okay, give yourself some type of

2074
01:36:37,200 --> 01:36:39,599
Speaker 2: purpose other than just you know, kicking it back and

2075
01:36:39,640 --> 01:36:43,720
Speaker 2: popping them in. So with that said, soft rep dot

2076
01:36:43,720 --> 01:36:47,120
Speaker 2: com ford slash merch, Gotta sell the merch, Gotta put

2077
01:36:47,160 --> 01:36:49,400
Speaker 2: the book club out there, which is book hyphen Club

2078
01:36:49,439 --> 01:36:53,000
Speaker 2: at soft rep dot com. And this is Rad saying peace.

2079
01:37:09,320 --> 01:37:12,720
Speaker 1: You've been listening to self red Ladia h