WEBVTT - Transformers with Teresa Lee 0:00:00.520 --> 0:00:03.560 On the Doe Cast, the questions asked if movies have 0:00:03.640 --> 0:00:07.520 women in um are all their discussions just boyfriends and husbands, 0:00:07.600 --> 0:00:12.639 or do they have individualism the patriarchy and best start 0:00:12.760 --> 0:00:16.520 changing it with the cast. Hey, welcome to the Beck 0:00:16.560 --> 0:00:18.520 Dol Cast. My name is Jamie, my name is Caitlin, 0:00:18.680 --> 0:00:20.480 and this is our podcast where we talk about the 0:00:20.560 --> 0:00:25.320 role of women in movies. Sometimes it is okay, wait, 0:00:25.360 --> 0:00:29.160 I just got really sidetracked, okay from what we haven't 0:00:29.160 --> 0:00:31.159 even I don't know. I just you know, like my 0:00:31.200 --> 0:00:33.479 brain just went off in forty five different directions and 0:00:33.560 --> 0:00:37.200 only one is the correct one. Well, a lot about 0:00:37.240 --> 0:00:39.559 fourteen of my thoughts right now are in reference to 0:00:39.600 --> 0:00:43.720 your braids, which, at the time of this recording, this 0:00:43.800 --> 0:00:50.560 is your last day of being thirty years old. A lot, right, Yeah, 0:00:51.640 --> 0:00:54.319 your last day of three How do you feel? I 0:00:54.360 --> 0:00:57.920 feel fine. As I've mentioned before, I am a woman 0:00:58.160 --> 0:01:02.680 of advancing years. I hate you round. You make it 0:01:02.760 --> 0:01:07.839 sound like your Jane fond like. No, I feel fine 0:01:07.840 --> 0:01:10.200 about it. I'll be thirty one tomorrow, although by the 0:01:10.200 --> 0:01:12.240 time this episode comes out, I will have been thirty 0:01:12.240 --> 0:01:16.640 one for a few weeks, so much wiser. Right, What 0:01:16.720 --> 0:01:19.440 was the correct way for remember, oh, this is our 0:01:19.480 --> 0:01:22.840 podcast about the role of women in movies. It is 0:01:23.360 --> 0:01:27.399 based around the Bechdel test, which movie must have a 0:01:27.840 --> 0:01:32.280 scene between two women who have names and they talk 0:01:32.319 --> 0:01:35.199 about something that is other than a man. Almost never 0:01:35.440 --> 0:01:40.160 happens or sometimes barely happens. Yes, sometimes it passed this 0:01:40.240 --> 0:01:43.640 by the skin of its teeth, and we're like right. 0:01:43.720 --> 0:01:46.280 And then sometimes it's like you have these convers like 0:01:46.319 --> 0:01:49.640 sometimes we'll have a conversation and I'll leave it like, yikes, 0:01:50.320 --> 0:01:52.840 that didn't pass either, which is like we were just 0:01:52.880 --> 0:01:55.960 complaining the whole time about man, which I which maybe 0:01:55.960 --> 0:01:58.120 you should count if it's like a very negative if 0:01:58.120 --> 0:02:03.400 you're talking about like murder ordering men, I would argue 0:02:03.400 --> 0:02:05.960 an amendment to the rule. You can't be talking about 0:02:05.960 --> 0:02:08.600 men or you can be talking about killing them due 0:02:08.639 --> 0:02:11.280 to the fact that they've wronged you, or for sport, 0:02:12.000 --> 0:02:16.360 or filling men for sport. Surely for sport. Yeah. So 0:02:16.400 --> 0:02:20.239 it's like if we're talking about our hunting trips, we 0:02:20.000 --> 0:02:23.760 we go out and kill problematic men, that does pass 0:02:23.880 --> 0:02:27.480 our vision, We're going to be arrested. That's okay, cool, 0:02:27.560 --> 0:02:29.359 that's okay. I was it as long as we're in 0:02:29.400 --> 0:02:31.639 jail together. I think that there should be a police 0:02:31.680 --> 0:02:36.440 officer outside of all open mics, just waiting to arrest 0:02:37.200 --> 0:02:39.400 man who say dangerous thing open mics. You've got an 0:02:39.400 --> 0:02:43.000 open can of Mike's hard lemonade. Whoa holy ship? Yeah, 0:02:43.160 --> 0:02:46.400 you're not wrong, You're not wrong. And now today I'm 0:02:46.440 --> 0:02:49.760 the only person with alcoholic Yeah, I meant to four pm. 0:02:49.840 --> 0:02:52.480 I feel like a real clown. I had every intention 0:02:52.560 --> 0:02:55.320 of bringing a small bottle of wine. I know, and 0:02:55.360 --> 0:02:57.760 I totally forgot it. But I feel like it was 0:02:57.840 --> 0:03:00.560 my best performance on an episode ever, the one one 0:03:00.600 --> 0:03:03.000 where I was drinking wine. It's like, you know, you 0:03:03.080 --> 0:03:05.480 like hit a point where you drink a little bit 0:03:05.520 --> 0:03:08.919 and then it makes you better at everything. That sounds 0:03:08.919 --> 0:03:13.920 like a dangerous message to spread. Oh yeah, like driving, 0:03:14.560 --> 0:03:18.880 not like operating heavy machinery. But like remember when um 0:03:19.160 --> 0:03:22.760 guitar Hero was popular like a decade ago. I know you, 0:03:23.360 --> 0:03:27.280 I know you're good at guitar Hero. There's bragging about 0:03:27.280 --> 0:03:31.160 it at Bengo last week. Oh man, that's embarrassing. We 0:03:31.160 --> 0:03:34.440 went to Bengal last week and and I was Caitlin 0:03:34.480 --> 0:03:36.840 was bragging about how good she is a guitar which 0:03:37.360 --> 0:03:39.400 which of those things is more embarrassing that we were 0:03:39.400 --> 0:03:41.600 at Bengal. I had a great time at Bingo, but 0:03:41.600 --> 0:03:44.520 only because I won. Yeah. True, we got to go 0:03:44.600 --> 0:03:47.640 back to that place and use our ten dollar gift certificate. Hey, 0:03:47.920 --> 0:03:50.440 we should introduce our guests before we yea we got 0:03:50.560 --> 0:03:54.960 rid of So I'd love to go to Bingo with 0:03:55.000 --> 0:03:59.520 our guests. Yes, addation to the table. Awesome our guest today, 0:03:59.640 --> 0:04:02.800 she were a Cracked dot com. Also, she runs a 0:04:02.920 --> 0:04:06.960 monthly comedy show in Los Angeles called Very Forward Teresa Lee. 0:04:08.200 --> 0:04:10.040 I was trying to be really good about not speaking 0:04:10.080 --> 0:04:15.800 before my intro um you podcast etiquette. We heard you 0:04:15.800 --> 0:04:21.400 guys all at people we went element, That's the rule. 0:04:22.120 --> 0:04:24.200 I also like to think that Mike's Hard has a 0:04:24.200 --> 0:04:26.680 surge in sales just because of this pot. I hope 0:04:26.760 --> 0:04:30.800 who else is drinking Mike's Hard at all? I don't know. 0:04:31.160 --> 0:04:34.440 I don't know, but my local seven elevens I was 0:04:34.520 --> 0:04:37.000 just I have a great screenshot on my phone right now. 0:04:37.240 --> 0:04:39.919 My friend and I are hanging out at a seven 0:04:39.920 --> 0:04:44.320 eleven tonight and plans to hang out that we're try Yeah, 0:04:44.320 --> 0:04:46.520 we're texting trying to figure out like which one to 0:04:46.560 --> 0:04:49.120 go to. Seven elevens are actually in Taiwan, like a 0:04:49.160 --> 0:04:51.480 really cool I mean that's not like a cool hangout, 0:04:51.480 --> 0:04:54.400 but they're much better. They're just like better food. It's 0:04:54.440 --> 0:04:57.320 like I can't describe. It's just like a happier vibe 0:04:57.360 --> 0:04:59.440 when you walk in. They have like tea, eggs and 0:04:59.440 --> 0:05:02.960 good food and there's like, my, it's really cute. Yeah, 0:05:03.000 --> 0:05:05.200 it's just like a cute place to go. It sounds 0:05:05.240 --> 0:05:07.719 like a wah wah yeah a little bit. It's a 0:05:07.760 --> 0:05:09.960 really nice, pleasant experience, whereas here I always think of 0:05:10.040 --> 0:05:13.279 just like drunk high school students. Yeah. And then me 0:05:15.400 --> 0:05:17.599 as someone who grew up in western Pennsylvania, I'm a 0:05:17.640 --> 0:05:21.680 sheets girl myself. I don't even what It's like a 0:05:21.880 --> 0:05:24.680 worse version of wah wah. As to say, I went 0:05:24.720 --> 0:05:26.760 to Philly recently and I was like, all I have 0:05:26.920 --> 0:05:28.680 to do is see the Liberty Bell and go to 0:05:28.760 --> 0:05:31.160 wa wa. What was cool? Well, it is cool, it 0:05:31.279 --> 0:05:34.120 was it was happened. I felt a little bit unsafe there, 0:05:34.440 --> 0:05:37.320 but it was also late and but you know, Walla rules. 0:05:37.680 --> 0:05:40.240 What else were we talking about? It seems so we're 0:05:40.240 --> 0:05:42.520 doing anything to talk about the movie. We're here, Yes, 0:05:43.640 --> 0:05:47.600 one more thing in regards to Duncan Donuts, which is 0:05:48.120 --> 0:05:50.880 my bread and butter. Having come from a town, I 0:05:50.920 --> 0:05:56.200 would call it your donut and frosting, but my and 0:05:56.360 --> 0:05:59.760 my donut and old frosting. The Duncan DUTs in Los 0:05:59.800 --> 0:06:02.880 ange Lists are they kind of sound like the Seven 0:06:02.920 --> 0:06:05.600 elevens you were describing, where people don't realize that they're 0:06:05.640 --> 0:06:11.920 supposed to be disgusting havens for society's forgotten yet and 0:06:12.080 --> 0:06:16.240 they're still pretty clean. There's a WiFi signal, people don't 0:06:16.240 --> 0:06:18.560 seem unhappy to be there. It's like it's amazing. I'm 0:06:18.600 --> 0:06:20.800 looking forward to about the year or so that we 0:06:20.920 --> 0:06:24.919 have left at the West Coast Los Angeles Duncan Donuts, 0:06:25.040 --> 0:06:28.719 God blessed. Shout out to my crew in that water 0:06:28.920 --> 0:06:32.400 village cool. Anything else we need to cover before we 0:06:32.800 --> 0:06:37.039 jump into the really great movie we're talking about feminist 0:06:37.400 --> 0:06:43.120 Michael Bays two thousand seven Transformers, and boy are we 0:06:43.880 --> 0:06:47.599 not happy about it. Three days to watch it because 0:06:47.600 --> 0:06:50.960 I had to keep stopping it so hard to watch 0:06:51.600 --> 0:06:54.680 it really is. Have you seen it before but a 0:06:54.760 --> 0:06:58.200 long time ago? Yeah? When did you first see it? 0:06:58.400 --> 0:07:01.480 I saw it at a drive in with my brother 0:07:01.560 --> 0:07:04.680 and my dad, which is like the two worst people 0:07:06.760 --> 0:07:08.680 at a drive in in Maine. There used to be 0:07:08.800 --> 0:07:11.840 they do double features. I saw it in the theater, 0:07:12.240 --> 0:07:15.560 then I watched it again for a paper that I 0:07:15.640 --> 0:07:19.520 wrote in college, which I brought and intend to read. Yes, 0:07:19.920 --> 0:07:23.640 I'm so excited. Then I watched it again to prep 0:07:23.720 --> 0:07:28.840 for this episode two times, and I'm I'm furious. First 0:07:28.880 --> 0:07:31.720 of all, it's an assault to all of my senses, 0:07:32.360 --> 0:07:36.560 including my sixth sense where and able to see dead people, 0:07:37.000 --> 0:07:44.840 and Hale, I'm gonna pass out, Hayley Joel Asmond will 0:07:44.880 --> 0:07:48.400 not respondent once that next to him off Broadway play. 0:07:49.240 --> 0:07:54.280 He's so cultured, so cultured, he's so smart, he's so small. 0:07:54.520 --> 0:07:57.000 I can fit him in a backpack. Why doesn't he 0:07:57.040 --> 0:08:00.600 hang out with me? I'm upset? This movie is just 0:08:01.600 --> 0:08:05.120 I hate this movie so much. And people are like, Okay, 0:08:05.200 --> 0:08:07.600 where are you doing an episode on this? Why is why? 0:08:07.680 --> 0:08:09.960 Who picked this? Why why are you doing it if 0:08:09.960 --> 0:08:11.560 you hate it so much? And yes, I picked it 0:08:11.640 --> 0:08:14.960 because this podcast is all about synergy. You know, there's 0:08:14.960 --> 0:08:18.360 a new Transformers movie coming out. We have to stay relevant. 0:08:19.960 --> 0:08:24.000 I do remember, not like I didn't remember not liking 0:08:24.040 --> 0:08:26.000 it as much as I did not like it this 0:08:26.080 --> 0:08:28.600 second time, because I remember being like, you know, a 0:08:28.680 --> 0:08:31.240 drunk food candy movie. But I remember being like, oh, 0:08:31.320 --> 0:08:33.400 it's fun. I remember Megan Fox was hot, and then 0:08:33.440 --> 0:08:36.320 rewatching it, there's so many more things that I was like, whoa, 0:08:36.480 --> 0:08:39.600 that was unnecessary? Like why did you put that line 0:08:39.679 --> 0:08:42.440 in what? I made a list of all the things 0:08:42.520 --> 0:08:46.520 that I don't like about it, which I will, well, 0:08:46.960 --> 0:08:49.360 should I start with the recap and then going, well, 0:08:49.440 --> 0:08:55.640 the paper that's great, I'm excited. What great did you 0:08:55.679 --> 0:08:58.000 get on this? I got an a minus. It's not 0:08:58.160 --> 0:09:00.360 well written. It was for an English class that I 0:09:00.440 --> 0:09:02.800 took in college. I had to write a review of something, 0:09:02.880 --> 0:09:04.800 and everyone else in the class was like they were 0:09:04.840 --> 0:09:07.480 writing reviews on things that they loved, and I was like, 0:09:07.520 --> 0:09:09.280 can I write a review on something that I hate? 0:09:09.360 --> 0:09:11.680 My teachers like yes, please, I said, great, I'm going 0:09:11.720 --> 0:09:14.920 to write about Transformers. This is this horribly written paper 0:09:15.120 --> 0:09:17.640 that I wrote in college. Okay. I wondered if a 0:09:17.679 --> 0:09:20.319 summer blockbuster that got a majority of fresh reviews on 0:09:20.400 --> 0:09:25.760 Rotten Tomatoes would transform my opinion of Michael Bay's capability 0:09:25.880 --> 0:09:30.199 as a director. When I watched Transformers, I was unpleasantly 0:09:30.280 --> 0:09:35.080 surprised by the movie and pleasantly unsurprised by Michael Bay 0:09:35.559 --> 0:09:39.800 and his inability to direct a decent film. Transformers is 0:09:39.840 --> 0:09:43.439 an overrated, clunky movie because of its inadequate script and 0:09:43.559 --> 0:09:49.240 poor direction. Cool thesis, thanks Caitlin. And then here's the plot. 0:09:49.520 --> 0:09:52.679 Um Sam Witwicky played by shy La Buff, the main character, 0:09:52.760 --> 0:09:56.480 gets a new car, which happens to be a transforming robot. 0:09:56.800 --> 0:09:59.520 More Transformers arrived to Earth from the depths of space 0:09:59.640 --> 0:10:03.280 looking for the Cube, a device that contains pure energy 0:10:03.720 --> 0:10:09.160 and that can create life a k transform It's not clear, Um, 0:10:09.440 --> 0:10:16.400 not super. Among the alien robots are Decepticons, evil Transformers 0:10:16.440 --> 0:10:19.280 who want the Cube to transform human technology so they 0:10:19.360 --> 0:10:23.199 can destroy the human race with it. I think the 0:10:23.320 --> 0:10:25.959 Cube is found, and when the Decepticons try to steal 0:10:26.000 --> 0:10:30.200 it from the US government, everyone battles. I'm not good 0:10:30.240 --> 0:10:34.320 at writing, and ultimately the good Transformers beat the Decepticons 0:10:34.400 --> 0:10:37.240 with the help of Sam and his friends and the 0:10:37.480 --> 0:10:44.800 US Air Force and Sector seven. Sector seven Okay, let 0:10:44.880 --> 0:10:47.720 me try to find the best part. Already sound exhausted. 0:10:47.800 --> 0:10:51.520 Transformers like the idea, like just to clarify the cartoon 0:10:52.200 --> 0:10:55.800 is cool, Like the movie is terrible, but the idea 0:10:55.840 --> 0:10:59.640 of alien robots good. I should have this by saying 0:10:59.679 --> 0:11:02.000 I I have not seen any I didn't play with 0:11:02.080 --> 0:11:06.520 any transformed toys. I didn't watch the series, and I 0:11:06.640 --> 0:11:08.839 have not seen the movie from the animated movie. From 0:11:10.720 --> 0:11:14.440 my history was yeah, I didn't watch the original movie. 0:11:14.480 --> 0:11:16.960 But the toys, well, I had like a family friend 0:11:17.000 --> 0:11:18.640 who was like two years older, who was like a 0:11:18.679 --> 0:11:20.480 guy who had all the guy toys. So I didn't 0:11:20.480 --> 0:11:22.559 have myself, but I always wanted, you know, we have 0:11:22.600 --> 0:11:26.680 an older friends. I wanted to impress him, so you'd 0:11:26.720 --> 0:11:29.120 have transformers, and I was like, I thought, if I 0:11:29.160 --> 0:11:31.880 could figure out how to change them, it would impress him. 0:11:32.480 --> 0:11:35.160 I play with those toys did not impress him. I 0:11:35.320 --> 0:11:40.080 was busy playing with mostly Legos. Okay, yeah, but we're 0:11:40.080 --> 0:11:42.400 not talking about the Lego movie. God damn it. Okay, 0:11:42.559 --> 0:11:45.600 yeah that's a fun one. I like that, right if 0:11:45.720 --> 0:11:48.000 he would. Okay, So then I go on to say 0:11:48.080 --> 0:11:50.800 where there should be progression of plot and character development, 0:11:51.200 --> 0:11:54.920 there is unneeded violence, stupid jokes, and characters who, when 0:11:54.960 --> 0:11:57.720 they aren't trying too hard to be super badass, they 0:11:57.760 --> 0:12:02.679 are delivering absurd lines of dialogue. A cop asks Sambo, 0:12:02.920 --> 0:12:08.280 my piece. A kid with a video camera runs towards explosions, 0:12:08.440 --> 0:12:11.920 exclaiming this is easily a hundred times cooler than Armageddon. 0:12:12.400 --> 0:12:15.800 Either Michael Bay, who also directed Armageddon, has no tax, 0:12:17.760 --> 0:12:21.640 has no tact by alluding to himself, or he is 0:12:21.640 --> 0:12:24.920 acknowledging just how terrible of a director he is. He 0:12:25.160 --> 0:12:29.000 is certainly not. He has no idea. He has no idea. 0:12:29.120 --> 0:12:31.800 He just strets off to that part of the movie. Right. Yeah, 0:12:32.920 --> 0:12:37.880 Armageddon is such a stinky movie. But boy does every 0:12:38.200 --> 0:12:43.240 parent of that era it openly admit to crying at Armageddon. 0:12:43.679 --> 0:12:51.480 My parents for sure cried at Arma that song because 0:12:51.559 --> 0:12:55.000 Live Tyler's in that movie, and so she's like, Dad, 0:12:55.559 --> 0:12:59.520 give us a banger. He does. Why don't they make 0:12:59.559 --> 0:13:02.160 a movie is on the Aerosmith roller coaster? It was 0:13:02.200 --> 0:13:06.280 an Aerosmith roller Yeah, man, I've I've dropped some hot 0:13:06.400 --> 0:13:09.439 revs to the ars throughout. We talked about it in 0:13:09.559 --> 0:13:14.760 every roller coaster movie one and this is what they're multiple. Yeah, 0:13:14.840 --> 0:13:18.319 the money the Rollercroaster movie there. I was reading something 0:13:18.679 --> 0:13:22.080 today about just like wow, this summer is just only 0:13:22.760 --> 0:13:25.320 reboots of things from ten years ago, and I feel 0:13:25.320 --> 0:13:28.440 like the Bechtel cast is really reflecting that, because we've 0:13:28.559 --> 0:13:31.439 been talking about a ton of anyways, it's called The 0:13:31.559 --> 0:13:35.959 Rock and Roller Coaster starring Arrowsmith. So, uh, if you're 0:13:36.000 --> 0:13:38.360 listening to this three or four years from now and 0:13:38.480 --> 0:13:41.479 you just saw the movie Rock and Roller Coaster starring Aerosmith, 0:13:41.600 --> 0:13:49.240 the movie chances are I wrote that, Oh boy. Then 0:13:49.320 --> 0:13:53.280 I write a few paragraphs about how it's riddled with cliches, 0:13:53.400 --> 0:13:56.080 that it failed to adhere to any sort of basic 0:13:56.200 --> 0:13:58.920 laws of physics, and it's hard to suspend my disbelief 0:13:58.960 --> 0:14:02.160 for a lot of things. And then twenty or twenty 0:14:02.200 --> 0:14:06.200 one year old Caitlin wrote, the only leading female character 0:14:06.600 --> 0:14:10.880 is just another sex object for teenage boys to fantasize about. 0:14:11.120 --> 0:14:13.760 Although they tried so desperately to avoid this by giving 0:14:13.800 --> 0:14:19.120 her a typical masculine ability, being adept at mechanics, she 0:14:19.280 --> 0:14:22.120 still is just a nice body with a pretty face 0:14:22.200 --> 0:14:26.720 and no brains behind it. So really solid analysis from 0:14:27.000 --> 0:14:29.880 ten years ago when I was dumb. And then I 0:14:29.960 --> 0:14:34.520 go on to say that it's poorly acted, poorly directed, 0:14:34.520 --> 0:14:38.240 blah blah blah. The cinematography is terrible, action scenes give 0:14:38.320 --> 0:14:42.120 you seizures, b editing a sloppy and then I say, 0:14:42.200 --> 0:14:44.680 I must ignore the possibility that this movie was made 0:14:44.720 --> 0:14:46.600 to serve as a two and a half hour commercial 0:14:46.720 --> 0:14:51.280 for the U. S. Air Force. And then I say, 0:14:51.520 --> 0:14:54.080 word on the street is that Michael Bay is directing 0:14:54.120 --> 0:14:58.320 Transformers Too, to be released in two thousand nine. Even 0:14:58.360 --> 0:15:01.600 if it's one d times better than Transformers, therefore ten 0:15:01.680 --> 0:15:05.280 thousand times better than Armageddon, it will still be a 0:15:05.800 --> 0:15:12.800 stupid Pecia ship. I didn't say that, but yeah, so 0:15:12.920 --> 0:15:16.520 that was my really cool paper, um my review of Transformers. 0:15:16.680 --> 0:15:18.800 Well done, Thank you, well done. I think you should 0:15:18.800 --> 0:15:20.360 have gotten a higher grade. I think I should have 0:15:20.400 --> 0:15:23.800 gotten a lower grade. Honestly, I could see it both ways. 0:15:25.320 --> 0:15:28.840 I think if we're grading on terms of passion, I 0:15:29.040 --> 0:15:34.520 was very passionate. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The recount, I 0:15:34.560 --> 0:15:36.800 don't even want to say it. I don't even want 0:15:36.800 --> 0:15:40.480 to go there. Of what happens, yeah, I mean, I'll 0:15:40.520 --> 0:15:43.600 do it as quickly as possible. Chila buff has a 0:15:43.640 --> 0:15:47.200 character with a very stupid name, Sam went Wicky. I 0:15:47.280 --> 0:15:49.680 would argue, this is where we lose him. This is 0:15:49.680 --> 0:15:51.840 where we lose him, because we had him. We had holes. 0:15:52.000 --> 0:15:54.920 We had holes. We had holes. I love holes, you know, 0:15:55.080 --> 0:15:57.760 even Stevens he made that misstep in that kind of 0:15:57.840 --> 0:16:02.360 offensive Disney Channel original movie called True Confessions. I won't 0:16:02.360 --> 0:16:05.640 get into it here, but this is where we lose him. 0:16:06.720 --> 0:16:10.480 Sam Whitwicky gets a car and it turns out that 0:16:10.640 --> 0:16:13.880 it's an alien space spot. There's a pair of glasses 0:16:13.920 --> 0:16:17.400 that belonged to his great grandfather and somehow they have 0:16:18.040 --> 0:16:21.560 important information and printed on them. Don't even they don't 0:16:21.600 --> 0:16:23.760 even come. They have the coordinates, but then the government 0:16:23.840 --> 0:16:25.000 is just like, oh, we know where it is, and 0:16:25.040 --> 0:16:28.520 then they just go away. It just goes Wait, are 0:16:28.560 --> 0:16:34.720 you suggesting that this story isn't very good? They just 0:16:34.840 --> 0:16:39.280 hired off and he was like, I already called make 0:16:39.360 --> 0:16:51.120 it where God, there's the bad Transformers, the bad guys. Yeah, 0:16:51.560 --> 0:16:57.680 one of them names Star Scream Starscream Scream. Really wait, 0:16:57.760 --> 0:17:00.240 it must sounds like a good guy blanked out. Yeah 0:17:00.320 --> 0:17:04.280 school name. He sounds like the legal Oh yeah, that 0:17:04.400 --> 0:17:08.840 does sound like a ruler name. That's good. But Mary 0:17:08.920 --> 0:17:13.920 fu Kill Optimus Prime, Megan Tron Star Scream love it, 0:17:14.320 --> 0:17:17.440 I love it anyway, who knows what the story is. 0:17:17.960 --> 0:17:20.800 There's big robots and they fight other big robots and 0:17:20.920 --> 0:17:23.560 Sam went Wick he's there with Megan Fox. He wants 0:17:23.600 --> 0:17:27.000 to fuck her. She's good at fixing cars the end, 0:17:27.119 --> 0:17:29.520 but she's a criminal and he gets mad when he finds. 0:17:29.800 --> 0:17:32.280 He's like, I can't believe you're lied about your criminal past, 0:17:32.359 --> 0:17:34.080 and she's like, I would have told you, but I 0:17:34.160 --> 0:17:38.000 was trying to protect my day. She's mad about this. 0:17:38.359 --> 0:17:43.400 He like the criminal part really disturbed me because when 0:17:43.480 --> 0:17:46.719 the agent John to her open, it's like yelling at 0:17:46.880 --> 0:17:50.120 Megan Fox, who's an underage high school girl, about being 0:17:50.160 --> 0:17:53.280 a criminal. He's like, criminals are hot. What are you training? Bra? 0:17:53.560 --> 0:17:55.639 Like he's like yelling at her. It's so disgusting And 0:17:55.680 --> 0:17:59.160 then he and the whole part disturb me so much. 0:17:59.240 --> 0:18:01.400 And then she makes a take off his clothes as 0:18:01.440 --> 0:18:04.560 a punishment. But that scene is so creepy because it's like, 0:18:05.040 --> 0:18:08.399 why is she still He's clearly getting off on this 0:18:08.640 --> 0:18:10.760 like that she made him take off his clothes and 0:18:10.800 --> 0:18:12.760 he said, you're going to go to DOT for this, 0:18:12.920 --> 0:18:16.320 and it's like, no, girl just made you take off 0:18:16.359 --> 0:18:20.879 your like and like totally forgot about that scene, like 0:18:21.000 --> 0:18:23.760 that was something I must have just blocked out he 0:18:24.080 --> 0:18:30.040 calls her training bra. He's like, to preserve my view 0:18:30.359 --> 0:18:32.719 of John Turtuot, I had to imagine at the end 0:18:32.760 --> 0:18:34.600 of every take of that him just being like, I'm 0:18:34.640 --> 0:18:38.880 so sorry, so sorry, and then explaining that he needs 0:18:38.960 --> 0:18:42.679 the money to like pay for his son's doctorate or something. 0:18:43.040 --> 0:18:45.159 I was like, surely John Turtuot must have had a 0:18:45.240 --> 0:18:49.040 noble reason for accepting. I'm just I mean, I'm just 0:18:49.119 --> 0:18:52.760 glad that it wasn't Alfred Molina. You know, there are 0:18:52.840 --> 0:18:54.720 worse men who could have gone down with this film, 0:18:55.280 --> 0:18:58.639 and Alfred he was good. He was coasting on his 0:18:58.840 --> 0:19:03.720 dock dock money. He was his reputation remains intact. Yeah, 0:19:03.840 --> 0:19:10.920 and that's hey, that's saying something. Yeah. That scene. There's 0:19:10.920 --> 0:19:13.560 also like a what I think is an attempt at 0:19:13.600 --> 0:19:16.760 a joke, where like he's wearing this like Sector seven 0:19:16.920 --> 0:19:20.640 like Superman T shirt, which is like, ha ha, look 0:19:20.680 --> 0:19:22.680 at him. He loves Sector seven so much he wears 0:19:22.720 --> 0:19:25.480 it an undershirt about it, and it's like, I think, 0:19:25.960 --> 0:19:29.760 an attempt at comedy, but it's not funny. I wasn't 0:19:29.760 --> 0:19:31.159 sure what they were going for. I think it was 0:19:31.200 --> 0:19:34.880 a joke. I think another huge thing about this movie. 0:19:34.920 --> 0:19:39.520 I forgot was like how integral the government is in it? 0:19:39.800 --> 0:19:42.200 Like when I thought of this because I did see 0:19:42.240 --> 0:19:46.159 it and presumably watched the whole thing, but like I 0:19:46.280 --> 0:19:49.000 just remember, like, oh yeah, Shyla buff cars, Megan Fox 0:19:49.119 --> 0:19:51.920 is treated like trash, like those are the three things. 0:19:52.040 --> 0:19:57.399 But I forgot there's so many yeah, like extended military sequences. 0:19:57.880 --> 0:20:00.399 So the point where it's like, I is bad. I 0:20:00.440 --> 0:20:02.600 didn't do correct research, but I'm like, were they receiving 0:20:02.760 --> 0:20:06.520 money from the military to make this? Because I mean 0:20:06.640 --> 0:20:09.440 so much of this movie is product placement, Like you 0:20:09.520 --> 0:20:13.560 know the cars are it's a commercial for General Motors, Right, 0:20:13.800 --> 0:20:15.800 it's like SD car too, Right when they pulled the 0:20:17.040 --> 0:20:22.320 drive out the verbi on it that one of the 0:20:22.480 --> 0:20:25.200 transformers picks up in like throws, which is weird because 0:20:25.200 --> 0:20:29.960 it's two thousand and seven, Like that's way fast, but sure, great. Yeah, 0:20:30.000 --> 0:20:33.080 there's a there's also like a Burger King image you see, 0:20:33.240 --> 0:20:36.120 there's a There's so much. I mean, it's it's insane. 0:20:36.320 --> 0:20:38.400 But I'm like, DoD they is that first of all? 0:20:38.560 --> 0:20:41.120 Is that would that be legal to take money from 0:20:41.119 --> 0:20:43.000 the US government to say like, hey, the U S 0:20:43.040 --> 0:20:45.399 government is great? Or is that just something you do 0:20:45.960 --> 0:20:48.200 because you're Michael Bay and you want attention. I don't know, 0:20:48.240 --> 0:20:51.160 I'd have to. I'd also have to do research about it. Yeah. 0:20:51.320 --> 0:20:54.600 I found a list of brands that are advertised in 0:20:54.720 --> 0:20:58.760 this movie. It is incredibly long. I'll read off as 0:20:58.800 --> 0:21:05.920 many as I can in a break through. Two Burger, King, Cadillacs, CBS, Chevrolet, Cisco, E, Bay, 0:21:06.480 --> 0:21:12.240 Gilmore Oil, gmc Hewlett, Packard, Hummer, iPod, MacBook, Mountain, dew 0:21:12.680 --> 0:21:21.600 of No, Kia, Panasonic, PayPal, Petal, Bismol, Pontiac, Porscha, Taco Bell, 0:21:21.760 --> 0:21:28.200 which is you know, too bad? I love Toyota, USA, Today, xbox, XM, 0:21:28.280 --> 0:21:35.520 Satellite Radio, Yahoo, and one fictional brand, Bolivia's Auto Sales. 0:21:35.760 --> 0:21:38.680 And that's it, right, just right. That is run by 0:21:39.119 --> 0:21:44.879 Bernie Mac's run by Bernie Mack write, not his character 0:21:45.440 --> 0:21:48.760 by Still. It's a little break of the fourth wall 0:21:48.920 --> 0:21:53.320 from the Grave Rest in Paradise Bernie Mac. That seems 0:21:53.400 --> 0:21:56.359 weird too, because there's he waves his mom across the 0:21:56.480 --> 0:22:00.760 hall and they're just like like just super slips him off, 0:22:01.400 --> 0:22:05.360 and then he says, he says, if I had a rock, 0:22:05.720 --> 0:22:09.480 I'd bust your head, bitch. That's a line that's spoken 0:22:09.720 --> 0:22:12.480 in this movie a male character to a female character, 0:22:13.320 --> 0:22:16.480 I mean Bernie Mack and any other person of color. 0:22:16.960 --> 0:22:21.240 The portrayal of those characters horribly racist and offensive. Holy 0:22:21.320 --> 0:22:24.840 sh It's just like they're screaming, they're loud when the 0:22:24.920 --> 0:22:28.800 cops break into the house or the FBI. And there's 0:22:28.800 --> 0:22:32.720 that scene where um, Anthony Anderson's house. Ye, brother just 0:22:33.640 --> 0:22:41.800 runs this, why is this happening? And um the character 0:22:41.960 --> 0:22:45.159 in the beginning who's speaking Spanish to his fellow air 0:22:45.280 --> 0:22:49.480 forces and they're like, don't fucking speak Spanish a piece 0:22:49.520 --> 0:22:51.760 of ship and he's like, no, I'm gonna keep it 0:22:51.840 --> 0:22:56.280 and they're like, don't English. Yeah, we're like to imagine 0:22:56.280 --> 0:22:58.960 that in like two thousand seven movie theaters. And was like, Oh, 0:23:00.440 --> 0:23:03.200 it's just it's like the subsect of people this movie 0:23:03.280 --> 0:23:07.800 does not fucking hate is so small that it's practically 0:23:07.920 --> 0:23:11.760 just shy al above and the government like and that's 0:23:11.800 --> 0:23:14.879 about it. And even certain people inside of the government 0:23:14.920 --> 0:23:17.360 through like this guy because he's not a white guy. 0:23:18.000 --> 0:23:20.359 Even like I feel like the movie tries to, like 0:23:20.520 --> 0:23:22.600 it'll kind of try to do something where're like, Okay, 0:23:22.640 --> 0:23:25.719 we're gonna give this woman a role and then they 0:23:25.800 --> 0:23:29.800 like shut it down, like the blonde Australian analyst, like 0:23:29.920 --> 0:23:32.480 we're gonna, you know, give a you know smart, make 0:23:32.520 --> 0:23:35.480 her smart and make a really knowledgeable. But then she 0:23:35.560 --> 0:23:37.959 has that theme where she figures out the Transformers thing. 0:23:38.040 --> 0:23:39.440 She walks in the room and the guys just like 0:23:40.000 --> 0:23:43.399 was she in here? And then for whatever, for no reason, 0:23:43.480 --> 0:23:45.719 like they hired her and then they who's she in here? 0:23:45.760 --> 0:23:47.600 And she's like They're like, oh, she figured it out, 0:23:47.640 --> 0:23:50.359 and the guy's just like she did it, like she 0:23:50.480 --> 0:23:52.960 probably had some help from her team. He says, why 0:23:53.000 --> 0:23:56.199 would I don't unders like waste of time and then 0:23:56.240 --> 0:23:58.600 they say something they're like, you stop using that brain 0:23:58.680 --> 0:24:03.200 mouth of yours, like what the fox You've hired her 0:24:03.480 --> 0:24:08.120 to help you and she did the thing and they yeah, 0:24:08.200 --> 0:24:10.960 they undermine her at every chance that yeah, and like 0:24:11.359 --> 0:24:15.600 she is arguably the most competent female character in the movie. 0:24:15.680 --> 0:24:17.760