WEBVTT - Let Men Be Vulnerable Feat. Rico Love 0:00:00.160 --> 0:00:02.800 Everything you go through, you learn. I think that all 0:00:02.880 --> 0:00:09.800 men should study and understand postpartum. Agreed, because the problem 0:00:09.920 --> 0:00:13.760 is I had no clue. And if I could really 0:00:14.640 --> 0:00:18.520 apologize to my kid's mom for one major thing, it 0:00:18.640 --> 0:00:22.000 was my ignorance to how postpartum works. And I'm going 0:00:22.040 --> 0:00:42.960 to tell you why. 0:00:43.479 --> 0:00:46.120 Welcome back to good mom's bad Choices. I'm Erica and 0:00:46.159 --> 0:00:50.159 I'm Mila. Happy Wednesday, Happy homp Day, My love. How 0:00:50.159 --> 0:00:53.640 you feeling, I'm great. You guys, we are in Miami. 0:00:54.040 --> 0:00:56.880 Hey, you know this is our first time. This is 0:00:56.880 --> 0:01:01.000 the first time being in Miami together. True, and also recording, 0:01:01.000 --> 0:01:02.320 and I am the best. I don't think we should 0:01:02.320 --> 0:01:04.959 have ever been here in our twenties together, you know what. 0:01:05.040 --> 0:01:08.360 I I'm a firm believer that our friendship happened towards 0:01:08.400 --> 0:01:10.680 our end of our late twenties early thirties because we 0:01:10.720 --> 0:01:13.840 wouldn't be able to handle being friends in our younger twenties. 0:01:13.840 --> 0:01:19.200 It would have just been like level ten wretchedness. So 0:01:19.400 --> 0:01:22.240 for the best of the people, for humanity, and for ourselves, 0:01:22.640 --> 0:01:25.759 we've only made it to Miami together at thirty five, 0:01:25.959 --> 0:01:30.080 when we're more a little bit more mature. So yeah, 0:01:30.120 --> 0:01:32.680 I'm having a good time. Can you take I just 0:01:32.760 --> 0:01:34.679 this is my first time really talking a lot today, 0:01:35.040 --> 0:01:37.640 so I feel like you can hear the recovery in 0:01:37.680 --> 0:01:41.000 my voice. Lots of things have happened in the last 0:01:41.040 --> 0:01:41.679 three days. 0:01:41.760 --> 0:01:43.800 It's true. I sa our friend's birthday. So we're out 0:01:43.800 --> 0:01:47.080 here shout out to cash Ley and so we've been 0:01:47.240 --> 0:01:50.120 We've been, you know, good momming, bad choicing. 0:01:50.600 --> 0:01:52.360 I feel like every time we're like, I coming to share. 0:01:52.400 --> 0:01:55.360 But I have this mental conversation with myself and I'm like, 0:01:55.400 --> 0:01:57.960 you know what, you're older like, we're gonna relax, We're 0:01:57.960 --> 0:01:59.920 gonna like get creative. We're gonna relax, drink a lot 0:01:59.920 --> 0:02:02.040 of water and do some work. And then I get 0:02:02.080 --> 0:02:04.559 to where I'm going and then I lose all sense 0:02:04.600 --> 0:02:08.760 of all of that shit. I'm like drugs, alcohol, pool parties. 0:02:12.080 --> 0:02:17.160 So that's where I'm at. Anyway, how are you feeling 0:02:17.160 --> 0:02:21.160 about your You've been kind of turned up, have I Yeah, 0:02:21.200 --> 0:02:23.040 you're a very white girl wasted yesterday. 0:02:23.160 --> 0:02:24.240 Oh thanks, we. 0:02:24.120 --> 0:02:26.400 Were talking about you when you're looking or like, wow, 0:02:26.480 --> 0:02:30.880 look at you can totally tell me Eric is drunk. Yeah, 0:02:30.919 --> 0:02:32.640 because you act like a drunken white girl. 0:02:32.760 --> 0:02:33.200 Perfect. 0:02:34.560 --> 0:02:36.640 Nisia said she's so nice when she's drunk. You can 0:02:36.720 --> 0:02:38.160 totally tell her demeanor changes. 0:02:38.280 --> 0:02:40.440 I was like, Damniti, she she's saying she's the post 0:02:40.600 --> 0:02:42.520 being a bitch all the time. Perfect. I love that. 0:02:42.639 --> 0:02:46.440 Thank you, Anisha. Thanks No. I've just been enjoying myself. 0:02:46.480 --> 0:02:48.639 I'm on vacation, I feelly. I haven't had a vacation 0:02:48.760 --> 0:02:50.639 a while, even though it does look like our life 0:02:50.760 --> 0:02:52.400 is a vacation. I know to some of you guys, 0:02:52.400 --> 0:02:57.600 it's fucking not. So I've been just indulging, relaxing, and 0:02:57.960 --> 0:02:59.760 I've had a great time. We had a book signing 0:03:00.360 --> 0:03:02.760 shout out to NICKI. Thank you so much Nikki for 0:03:02.840 --> 0:03:06.520 putting together our book signing work at Moms and everyone 0:03:06.560 --> 0:03:09.400 that showed up and came out. I'm like, really happy 0:03:09.440 --> 0:03:12.120 that we really do have a Florida try about here. 0:03:12.160 --> 0:03:16.000 It was really cool to meet everybody and connect and. 0:03:17.440 --> 0:03:22.400 Yeah, Bessie, well, without further ado, because I know the 0:03:22.440 --> 0:03:25.480 YouTubers hate when we do this. We have a very 0:03:25.520 --> 0:03:28.520 special guest with us today, you guys know, and June. 0:03:28.520 --> 0:03:34.160 We'd like to celebrate our zaddies. It's fine Zaddi June, 0:03:35.440 --> 0:03:39.200 our annual find Zaddy June is with us again, and 0:03:39.240 --> 0:03:41.880 today we've traveled to Miami and we're getting some Miami 0:03:42.080 --> 0:03:48.120 Florida guest and today we have producer, artist songwriter father 0:03:48.840 --> 0:03:49.440 Rico Love. 0:03:49.680 --> 0:03:52.640 What's up with I'm listening. I'm like, damn, we got 0:03:52.680 --> 0:03:56.280 really good podcast voices. I don't know if I have 0:03:56.360 --> 0:03:58.280 the podcast voice. I was like, damn, I got to 0:03:58.280 --> 0:03:59.920 compete with some amazing voices. Here. 0:04:00.240 --> 0:04:01.200 You are the voice. 0:04:01.200 --> 0:04:02.320 What you're talking about. 0:04:02.360 --> 0:04:03.960 All you do is curate voices. 0:04:04.760 --> 0:04:06.280 What you do, That's why I can hear. 0:04:06.920 --> 0:04:08.000 Yeah, I was gonna say, but if you think that 0:04:08.040 --> 0:04:09.800 we have great voices, I will take that. Hear that 0:04:09.840 --> 0:04:11.800 guy's real love things. We have great voices. 0:04:11.920 --> 0:04:13.560 You know what. I'm happy you said that because last 0:04:13.600 --> 0:04:16.159 night I came to the conclusion I just remembered. You 0:04:16.200 --> 0:04:18.640 just reminded me. I was someone told us like, the 0:04:18.680 --> 0:04:20.880 streaming money is where it's at, and I was like, well, 0:04:20.920 --> 0:04:22.920 not in podcasting. And then she was like we should 0:04:22.960 --> 0:04:26.000 do a collab and I was like, Erica, podcasting is over, 0:04:26.200 --> 0:04:27.919 were rapping or we're going to be a group, so 0:04:28.000 --> 0:04:28.680 figure it out. 0:04:28.880 --> 0:04:30.839 And streaming in music. 0:04:32.800 --> 0:04:35.200 She was like, the streaming money is crazy and literally 0:04:35.240 --> 0:04:37.320 was like, so we're going to start rapping. I was like, 0:04:37.360 --> 0:04:38.920 I don't know, but if City Girls could do it, 0:04:38.960 --> 0:04:41.200 so can we. I don't know if you heard Rico, 0:04:41.240 --> 0:04:42.680 but we're the City Girls a podcast. 0:04:42.839 --> 0:04:43.320 Okay, I. 0:04:44.800 --> 0:04:47.040 Have a problem told us that he did say that. 0:04:50.839 --> 0:04:52.640 I don't know if I co signed that. You do 0:04:52.800 --> 0:04:57.960 you do like fifty City Girls fifty? I don't know, Oprah, Okay, I. 0:04:57.920 --> 0:05:02.560 Was gonna say six for to six. You're pushing it 0:05:02.760 --> 0:05:09.600 very five? What's the Wasted White Girl podcast? 0:05:10.480 --> 0:05:11.400 That is not what we are. 0:05:11.720 --> 0:05:15.000 I saw this clip of Tony Braxton speaking about how 0:05:15.040 --> 0:05:18.640 mean Oprah was to her on the show. And I 0:05:18.680 --> 0:05:22.000 saw the clip and Tony Braxton had just foul for 0:05:22.120 --> 0:05:24.240 bankruptcy and she went on Opra to talk about it, 0:05:24.240 --> 0:05:27.560 and Oprah was like berating her, Like it was like, 0:05:27.800 --> 0:05:30.360 do you feel like it's your fault? She was like, well, 0:05:30.400 --> 0:05:33.320 I'm Oprah. You don't you have Gucci plates? And she 0:05:33.400 --> 0:05:35.440 was like, yeah, you know, I'm Oprah and I don't 0:05:35.440 --> 0:05:38.160 have Gucci plates. And it was what was going on. 0:05:38.920 --> 0:05:41.760 She's trying to put in perspective for her. I mean, 0:05:41.760 --> 0:05:43.600 I might need to release those Gucci plates. 0:05:44.040 --> 0:05:48.640 I bit you think, I don't. I don't. I'm not surprised, 0:05:48.680 --> 0:05:50.760 like does Oprah seem like the nice aunt? 0:05:50.920 --> 0:05:51.040 Like? 0:05:51.120 --> 0:05:54.400 I don't know. I just always thought Oprah seem really nice. 0:05:54.680 --> 0:05:57.120 I know, her stance on the N where was always really. 0:05:57.040 --> 0:05:58.760 Weird to me, because what is her stance on the 0:05:58.839 --> 0:05:59.159 N word? 0:06:00.040 --> 0:06:02.919 Anybody says it, but that's like a grandmother energy exactly 0:06:02.960 --> 0:06:05.640 like somebody's. But I just thought she was aggressive about 0:06:06.080 --> 0:06:08.880 the conversation about it. You know, when I see I 0:06:08.920 --> 0:06:10.520 love I don't know if it's cool to say, but 0:06:10.560 --> 0:06:11.880 I love Cosby right, like. 0:06:13.960 --> 0:06:16.839 Everything goes here, just love Cosby. 0:06:16.880 --> 0:06:19.400 But I would always get upset when he would criticize 0:06:20.160 --> 0:06:23.360 the younger generation and names. And I feel the same 0:06:23.400 --> 0:06:25.760 way about Steve Harvey. I just don't. Really, I'm not 0:06:25.800 --> 0:06:26.120 a fan. 0:06:26.240 --> 0:06:29.280 Don't don't get her started. But I just I didn't 0:06:29.320 --> 0:06:29.800 have to look over. 0:06:30.080 --> 0:06:33.160 I hated the way that he was always anti his 0:06:33.279 --> 0:06:37.880 anti blackness young and you know, and I definitely as 0:06:37.920 --> 0:06:40.000 a forty year old now, I always say I have 0:06:40.040 --> 0:06:41.760 to say I'm forty at least six times a day 0:06:42.440 --> 0:06:45.680 because you yourself, whenever you turn forty, you always are saying, like, bro, 0:06:45.720 --> 0:06:46.400 I'm forty, I don't. 0:06:46.600 --> 0:06:48.560 I don't shame about the new ship. 0:06:48.680 --> 0:06:50.599 It is like, I'm I'm smart. 0:06:50.640 --> 0:06:52.039 I don't do that no more forty like. 0:06:52.040 --> 0:06:56.360 That, you like, I'm forty years what are you talking about? No? 0:06:56.440 --> 0:06:59.240 But as a forty year I do look at things 0:06:59.279 --> 0:07:01.840 that this generation does and I'm a little bit annoyed. 0:07:01.839 --> 0:07:03.679 But I always think to myself, I'm in a business 0:07:03.720 --> 0:07:05.719 where I have to try to understand it, right. So 0:07:05.800 --> 0:07:09.560 I think that the Oprahs, that Bill Cosby's and the 0:07:09.560 --> 0:07:11.440 Steve Abbys of the world, I don't think they gave 0:07:12.240 --> 0:07:15.360 my generation to fear a shot and how to you know, 0:07:15.640 --> 0:07:19.480 perceive It's always a really harsh criticism it. So I 0:07:19.480 --> 0:07:21.840 think that now that I'm the age that they were 0:07:21.960 --> 0:07:24.560 when they were doing that, to me, I feel like 0:07:25.000 --> 0:07:27.160 I'm a little bit I understand it a little bit. 0:07:27.160 --> 0:07:29.480 But my approach to it is never like what are 0:07:29.560 --> 0:07:31.520 y'all doing and y'all shouldn't do this, blah blah blah. 0:07:31.760 --> 0:07:34.480 I remember when Bill Cosby want in a tire rate 0:07:34.520 --> 0:07:38.520 about stop naming your daughter's laquishiaq was. I remember that 0:07:38.200 --> 0:07:40.960 and I was so annoyed with that because I'm like, 0:07:41.120 --> 0:07:44.560 that's not that's somebody's name, and you know, you guys 0:07:44.560 --> 0:07:46.800 will figure out and figure out a name for some 0:07:46.960 --> 0:07:50.920 crazy Russian and some you know, like difficult name that 0:07:51.000 --> 0:07:53.480 you feel like is European, but then you have a 0:07:53.480 --> 0:07:55.960 hard time saying Laquishia. It's very easy to say Luquisia. 0:07:56.080 --> 0:07:56.520 We said it. 0:07:56.880 --> 0:07:59.000 I feel I agree. I feel like we got we 0:07:59.080 --> 0:08:01.840 got worship to worry about, like then somebody's fucking name. 0:08:02.360 --> 0:08:05.240 I also feel like I feel like I feel like 0:08:05.240 --> 0:08:07.240 there's a thin line too, because some of the shit 0:08:07.360 --> 0:08:12.520 be some like level four hundred nigga shit, and I'm embarrassed, 0:08:13.440 --> 0:08:14.960 you know what I mean, Like I get it, like 0:08:15.000 --> 0:08:18.240 I'm I I'm with the ships and I'm and I 0:08:18.240 --> 0:08:20.480 don't like, I don't like us judging each other, like 0:08:20.480 --> 0:08:23.080 like I hate that, like we already got enough shit 0:08:23.160 --> 0:08:26.080 to like to deal with with everybody else judging us 0:08:26.120 --> 0:08:28.480 and putting like stereotypes on us and us walking into 0:08:28.520 --> 0:08:30.559 a building and have to like battle all those things 0:08:30.560 --> 0:08:33.000 before even getting to anything. So I hate that we 0:08:33.040 --> 0:08:36.079 do it to each other, especially like niggas like Steve Harvey. 0:08:36.120 --> 0:08:42.679 I feel like he's like a performative monkey. 0:08:42.880 --> 0:08:46.520 Tell the people how you say, you know, I think 0:08:46.720 --> 0:08:47.160 you made. 0:08:47.040 --> 0:08:50.200 A comment about like perform like he don't. He don't. Basically, 0:08:50.240 --> 0:08:52.960 he didn't mind like chucking and jiving for the for 0:08:53.000 --> 0:08:54.240 the check is what he said. 0:08:54.280 --> 0:08:56.680 Well, you know, I think that people of hit his 0:08:56.840 --> 0:08:59.840 level of success have had to make certain sacrifices and 0:09:00.000 --> 0:09:02.160 fit into certain boxes, and so they then think that 0:09:02.200 --> 0:09:04.480 everyone else, in order to reach that level of success 0:09:04.800 --> 0:09:08.200 needs to follow the blueprint that he followed, and if 0:09:08.200 --> 0:09:10.360 they don't, there's judgment there. And also he comes from 0:09:10.400 --> 0:09:13.000 a different time too, right, And now the whole thing, yeah, 0:09:13.040 --> 0:09:15.360 where things were not there is very black and white. 0:09:15.559 --> 0:09:17.880 I get the perspective of I come from this time, 0:09:17.960 --> 0:09:20.160 and I get the perspective of this is how you 0:09:20.160 --> 0:09:22.040 should behave because that part of it I get. But 0:09:22.120 --> 0:09:25.000 I think that the approach, so when I talk about Steve, 0:09:25.080 --> 0:09:28.320 or when I talk about Oprah or even mister Cosby, 0:09:28.760 --> 0:09:31.840 is never like a y'all. I hate that y'all. I 0:09:31.840 --> 0:09:34.880 think that the understanding of that the times are different 0:09:35.200 --> 0:09:37.640 is there, but the approach in which you say is 0:09:37.640 --> 0:09:39.880 always there. And I'm a big approach person. I'm a 0:09:39.920 --> 0:09:42.199 big Something can turn me off totally, even if it's 0:09:42.240 --> 0:09:44.360 I agree with what you're saying, But if the approach 0:09:44.440 --> 0:09:46.559 is like, bro, like, I think we should try to 0:09:46.679 --> 0:09:50.800 lead with love and be kind first, and that's better 0:09:50.840 --> 0:09:54.520 because what you're what broke my heart about Bill Cosby 0:09:54.640 --> 0:09:57.760 was like, you're telling people that the reason why you're 0:09:57.880 --> 0:09:59.720 not getting these jobs is because your name and your daughters. 0:09:59.760 --> 0:10:02.360 This is and it's like you're telling black people that 0:10:02.440 --> 0:10:05.480 we can't express ourselves in certain ways and we can't 0:10:05.480 --> 0:10:11.400 be unapologetically black because it'll hinder our relationship with corporate 0:10:11.400 --> 0:10:14.640 White America. That is not something that a person who's 0:10:14.679 --> 0:10:18.000 donated millions and millions and millions of dollars to HBCUs 0:10:18.080 --> 0:10:22.319 should not be, you know, speaking like, Yeah, that shouldn't 0:10:22.360 --> 0:10:23.760 be your approach my opinion, But. 0:10:24.440 --> 0:10:28.679 I think it encourages us to perform. It encourages us 0:10:28.760 --> 0:10:32.400 to like fit into these boxes and to and and 0:10:32.679 --> 0:10:38.560 unfortunately we've all we've all been like uh in ways, 0:10:38.559 --> 0:10:39.960 we've all had to be a product of that. Right, 0:10:40.000 --> 0:10:41.440 you walk into the bank, you know how to talk, 0:10:41.480 --> 0:10:43.400 you walk into the place, you know. But what I 0:10:43.440 --> 0:10:45.120 find and this is my biggest argument when I like 0:10:45.160 --> 0:10:46.880 people bring up shit like this, like, as black people, 0:10:46.880 --> 0:10:48.840 you can't wear the bonnet. As black people, you can't 0:10:48.880 --> 0:10:50.240 be loud. And of course I've gone to places and 0:10:50.320 --> 0:10:53.920 niggas during nigga shit and I'm completely fucking embarrassed. Shut 0:10:53.960 --> 0:10:56.720 the fuck off, you're embarrassing us all. But my dad 0:10:56.800 --> 0:10:58.640 like put that like heavily on me or like you know, 0:10:58.800 --> 0:11:00.679 my dad was like, don't wear we ves and like 0:11:00.800 --> 0:11:02.520 all these things. And there are certain you know, like 0:11:03.160 --> 0:11:08.960 black people in our chuest natures were expressive, loud, like happy, full, 0:11:09.280 --> 0:11:11.920 colorful people. So it's like it doesn't make sense for 0:11:12.000 --> 0:11:16.280 us to try and conform to this like bland, saltless whiteness, 0:11:16.280 --> 0:11:18.920 like we're never going to be that. So that it 0:11:19.000 --> 0:11:22.480 irritates me too, and I and I so I agree some. 0:11:22.480 --> 0:11:25.960 Things annoying me across racial line, like regardless. So if 0:11:25.960 --> 0:11:28.800 I'm on the airplane and the plane lands and somebody 0:11:28.800 --> 0:11:30.880 gets on the phone and they're like he's a white guy, 0:11:30.920 --> 0:11:33.240 and he's like, yeah, we're a terminal shiit, Like bro, 0:11:35.000 --> 0:11:36.920 the same thing is when I get on the plane 0:11:36.960 --> 0:11:39.160 and I hear a black person no matter what color. 0:11:40.760 --> 0:11:44.000 But what I do notice is like frat guys are 0:11:44.200 --> 0:11:46.200 going to Vegas, right, You go to Vegas and you 0:11:46.200 --> 0:11:47.600 get in the plane and a bunch of the junk 0:11:47.600 --> 0:11:50.360 white guys are like, bro, you're in the fucking in 0:11:50.440 --> 0:11:55.400 obacam in first class. Like that's like it's annoying. But 0:11:55.440 --> 0:12:00.240 people are like whatever, but we do it. But the 0:12:00.280 --> 0:12:03.319 word nigga scares the shit out of people. So when 0:12:03.320 --> 0:12:08.479 people like. 0:12:06.280 --> 0:12:08.360 I kind of love it, I kind of love it. 0:12:08.720 --> 0:12:10.319 I love to kind of see white people squirm a 0:12:10.320 --> 0:12:11.800 little bit, like you're uncomfortable behind the. 0:12:11.760 --> 0:12:14.120 Reason why it makes me uncomfortable in the sense that 0:12:14.120 --> 0:12:17.960 I don't like us. I don't like us representing ourselves 0:12:17.960 --> 0:12:21.680 like that. I prefer not to share it around white 0:12:21.679 --> 0:12:24.240 people unless they friends of mine, because if they're friends 0:12:24.240 --> 0:12:27.520 of mine, I'm like, nigga, I told you, they can't 0:12:27.520 --> 0:12:30.080 see it. But I just feel like when I see 0:12:30.080 --> 0:12:31.840 it in public, I'm like, we don't have to behave 0:12:31.880 --> 0:12:35.280 this way. And the problem is Bruce. Bruce says something 0:12:35.520 --> 0:12:37.840 years ago that I thought it was genius. He said, 0:12:37.840 --> 0:12:40.120 I if a white man walks in here right now. 0:12:40.120 --> 0:12:42.280 The difference between perceptions is if a white man walks 0:12:42.280 --> 0:12:45.600 in here right now and he acts crazy and he's 0:12:45.720 --> 0:12:50.040 drunk and he's belligerent, we'll say that white dude is crazy, right, 0:12:50.360 --> 0:12:53.520 black man comes and does the same thing. The consensus 0:12:53.640 --> 0:12:58.439 is black people, So I always keep that in mind. 0:12:58.480 --> 0:13:01.400 I always consider like, even if I'm in a situation 0:13:01.440 --> 0:13:05.000 where I be upset, I always behave myself in a way, 0:13:05.960 --> 0:13:08.679 understanding that when I do something, I'm representing all of us, 0:13:08.760 --> 0:13:13.080 even though it's not fair. Sometimes I definitely, but I 0:13:13.160 --> 0:13:14.960 keep it in mind because I want to make sure 0:13:14.960 --> 0:13:17.600 that nobody can leave the situation and saying even if 0:13:17.600 --> 0:13:20.040 it's wrong, even if they're there, which is most of 0:13:20.080 --> 0:13:22.640 the time wrong to judge somebody based off one experience 0:13:23.000 --> 0:13:25.600 or judge a group of People's wrong to judge one 0:13:25.600 --> 0:13:28.720 person off one experience, but it's even worse to judge 0:13:28.800 --> 0:13:31.000 a whole race of people because of one experience you 0:13:31.040 --> 0:13:33.160 have with one person on a Thursday night at a 0:13:33.200 --> 0:13:37.000 club who was upset, right, So I always keep in 0:13:37.080 --> 0:13:39.400 mind that it does happen, and I know that we 0:13:39.520 --> 0:13:42.080 can't lift certain things down, so I make sure I 0:13:42.120 --> 0:13:46.240 behave myself even when I'm angry. But I always believe 0:13:46.280 --> 0:13:48.240 that we don't know who anybody is until they're angry. 0:13:48.320 --> 0:13:50.200 So I always if I'm a good person, I'm a 0:13:50.200 --> 0:13:51.920 good person. Angry. I'm a good person. Happy, I'm a 0:13:51.920 --> 0:13:53.960 good person, said, how do I behave in a situation? 0:13:54.559 --> 0:13:56.960 I'm basing that off of who I am and my character. 0:13:57.200 --> 0:14:01.199 Your character does not mean the mood character is different. 0:14:01.240 --> 0:14:02.240 It's gonna it's gonna be. 0:14:02.320 --> 0:14:04.880 My mood can be can change, but my character can 0:14:04.920 --> 0:14:07.800 never be. Question you can never change your character. Your 0:14:07.840 --> 0:14:15.480 mood can change, never change the character. When's your birthday? 0:14:15.559 --> 0:14:19.440 Oh yes, sad, I was gonna say something totally still 0:14:19.720 --> 0:14:25.280 totally like some immature we're gonna say something important. 0:14:25.320 --> 0:14:26.320 Go ahead, I work at now. 0:14:26.320 --> 0:14:30.080 I need no speaking of imagery and representing the blacks, 0:14:30.920 --> 0:14:33.520 have you guys, have you guys seen Sukiana with a 0:14:33.520 --> 0:14:36.680 good CoA cheese video where she's getting walked like a 0:14:36.720 --> 0:14:39.120 dog with my blue face, I don't know one of 0:14:39.160 --> 0:14:40.320 the babies, one of the blues and. 0:14:40.360 --> 0:14:42.080 No, no, no, it isn't. 0:14:44.920 --> 0:14:47.440 Yeah, you know we're gonna get we gotta brush up 0:14:47.440 --> 0:14:50.640 on our rappers. So I don't like old. What do 0:14:50.640 --> 0:14:52.960 you guys think? Were you guys disappointed in her being 0:14:52.960 --> 0:14:53.520 walked like a. 0:14:53.520 --> 0:14:56.840 Dog or I'm not disappointed in anything. That's her character, 0:14:56.880 --> 0:14:58.560 that's who, that's the character she plays. 0:14:58.600 --> 0:15:01.240 It's at least her brand and support the brand. I 0:15:01.280 --> 0:15:03.400 wasn't really that mad at that. I said. This was 0:15:03.440 --> 0:15:05.200 her idea, so it wasn't. 0:15:05.040 --> 0:15:09.720 Like he suggested it. But I also have seen her 0:15:09.800 --> 0:15:13.400 in the honest moments, and I understand it's a character 0:15:13.560 --> 0:15:15.840 when when Jessica Simpson first came out and she's like 0:15:15.920 --> 0:15:16.440 fishing to. 0:15:16.400 --> 0:15:18.920 See is that right? Right? 0:15:19.120 --> 0:15:21.520 She knew that she's not a moron. I know her 0:15:21.600 --> 0:15:24.000 best friend, Casey right, we met years ago and she's 0:15:24.000 --> 0:15:27.320 a good friend of mine. And I hung around Jessica 0:15:27.360 --> 0:15:29.520 once and I was like, she's actually brilliant. 0:15:29.760 --> 0:15:35.200 Another name Jessica Jessica Simpsons talk about name is Jessica. 0:15:35.560 --> 0:15:39.040 No. But what I say is that when a white 0:15:39.040 --> 0:15:42.360 girl acts really dumb and makes millions of dollars and 0:15:42.480 --> 0:15:45.600 creates a brand off being a moron, then it's like, 0:15:46.120 --> 0:15:48.600 you know, but to understand to not even be able 0:15:48.640 --> 0:15:51.880 to wrap your mind around the potential idea that this 0:15:52.000 --> 0:15:54.760 black girl is smart enough to sell take it a bag. 0:15:55.440 --> 0:15:57.760 And I know a lot of people I don't know 0:15:57.800 --> 0:16:00.280 a lot of guys that said said they fuck her, 0:16:00.560 --> 0:16:02.480 and guys took like you know what I mean? Yeah, 0:16:02.680 --> 0:16:07.240 So I know a lot of guys, and I'd be like, right. 0:16:07.360 --> 0:16:10.800 So the point is this part of this has to 0:16:10.840 --> 0:16:13.560 be performative. Part is this has to say that this 0:16:13.600 --> 0:16:16.480 is a this is a brank, this is an opening, and. 0:16:16.320 --> 0:16:18.760 We're all we live in social media times. Is it 0:16:18.800 --> 0:16:21.240 is performative. But I think about too, like you saying that, 0:16:21.560 --> 0:16:24.960 you know, when a black person does something wild, that 0:16:25.080 --> 0:16:28.040 it like categorized the whole community. And so I think 0:16:28.080 --> 0:16:30.480 when she did that, a lot of people were mad 0:16:30.520 --> 0:16:34.000 because they're like, oh, she's taking women back, taking black women, 0:16:35.160 --> 0:16:36.920 and that's what's gonna say. That's what I was going 0:16:37.000 --> 0:16:39.200 to say. I was like, you know, it's true because 0:16:39.280 --> 0:16:41.720 they people were mad at that as well, even though 0:16:41.720 --> 0:16:43.480 it was this woman's free will. She chose to do that, 0:16:43.520 --> 0:16:46.280 no one made her, and she's she's she seems very 0:16:46.560 --> 0:16:48.640 assertive in who she is. Doesn't seem like anyone's gonna 0:16:48.640 --> 0:16:49.280 force her to do shit. 0:16:49.360 --> 0:16:51.240 It's hilarious to me. I think it's comedy. I don't 0:16:51.240 --> 0:16:55.640 look at it. It's even like you know, like she's promoting. 0:16:55.960 --> 0:16:58.440 I think it's comedy. I think she's making a huge 0:16:58.560 --> 0:17:01.160 joke and I don't think anybody is laughing. But I 0:17:01.200 --> 0:17:04.119 think that a lot of people were laughing, like, but 0:17:04.160 --> 0:17:07.119 I'm with her. I'm thinking, but I'm thinking some people 0:17:07.200 --> 0:17:10.280 are not understanding that this is well. I think behind 0:17:10.320 --> 0:17:13.399 closed doors, she's like, are they nuts? They really believe that? 0:17:13.520 --> 0:17:14.399 I believe this stuff? 0:17:14.520 --> 0:17:17.439 You know, she's smart. She's the only reason I started 0:17:17.440 --> 0:17:19.720 following her is because she was like a big She 0:17:19.840 --> 0:17:24.720 was a big like she was supporting like breastfeeding. She's 0:17:24.760 --> 0:17:26.120 a lot of kids, and how she was like breastfeeding 0:17:26.160 --> 0:17:28.240 and how it's like much more like healthy. I was like, oh, 0:17:28.280 --> 0:17:30.199 I wasn't expecting this from her, but that's where I 0:17:30.200 --> 0:17:33.080 started following her. So it's your like you said, perception 0:17:33.280 --> 0:17:35.200 and what and then it's like you do one thing 0:17:35.359 --> 0:17:38.000 and it's a maybe a slither of your existence and 0:17:38.000 --> 0:17:42.000 then everybody's like perceives that that's your whole existence, and 0:17:42.040 --> 0:17:44.800 like like he's like especially for women, especially for black people, 0:17:45.160 --> 0:17:48.000 especially for mothers, especially for fathers, And I think like 0:17:48.359 --> 0:17:51.800 even for us, we talk a lot of shit, we 0:17:51.840 --> 0:17:54.080 tall a lot of our business and obviously like people, 0:17:54.280 --> 0:17:56.800 we can listen to us in all seven hundred fucking 0:17:56.840 --> 0:17:59.080 hours for the last five years, but it's still a 0:17:59.200 --> 0:18:02.000 very small of who we are, you know, but you 0:18:02.040 --> 0:18:04.760 see a thirty second clip and I'm like, and. 0:18:04.720 --> 0:18:06.840 That's what when you said earlier? So you don't like 0:18:06.880 --> 0:18:08.880 when black people judge each other. And I think that 0:18:08.880 --> 0:18:11.199 that's the key, Like we have to be able to 0:18:11.200 --> 0:18:13.439 be open enough to realize that this is a person 0:18:13.480 --> 0:18:16.560 speaking about one element or aspect of their life at 0:18:16.560 --> 0:18:19.639 one period of their life, one moment, how we feel, 0:18:19.760 --> 0:18:21.920 and we also have to understand it. Sometimes you'll blurt 0:18:21.960 --> 0:18:24.800 out something just based on the first reaction, and later 0:18:24.840 --> 0:18:27.600 on you'll think about it, like I don't think I 0:18:27.680 --> 0:18:29.919 agree with what I said earlier. Right, we have to 0:18:29.960 --> 0:18:32.399 give each other that luxury. It's almost like a picture, 0:18:32.480 --> 0:18:36.520 right when people see like a picture of I don't know, 0:18:36.640 --> 0:18:39.160 Nicki minaj right, Nicki Minajen. It's a bad picture, right, 0:18:39.320 --> 0:18:41.080 and they'll be like, oh my gosh, she looks terrible, 0:18:41.440 --> 0:18:43.840 But you just had your friend take a picture for 0:18:43.880 --> 0:18:47.520 you fifty times because you didn't like the way that picture. 0:18:47.760 --> 0:18:50.720 Now she don't get to tell paparazzi let's take this 0:18:50.800 --> 0:18:53.840 picture again. She's just walking and being herself. So I 0:18:53.840 --> 0:18:56.439 think that we have to be open and these are moments, 0:18:56.480 --> 0:19:01.240 these are seconds, these are quick spurts of reactions sometimes 0:19:01.280 --> 0:19:03.280 that people have. We have to give each other the 0:19:03.320 --> 0:19:07.000 grace to say, you know, maybe she just was feeling 0:19:07.040 --> 0:19:09.159 that at the moment, or maybe she was just a 0:19:09.240 --> 0:19:13.720 little bit you know, she just was being spontaneous and 0:19:14.200 --> 0:19:16.679 voicing out something that may not necessarily be how she 0:19:16.840 --> 0:19:19.640 views things. And I think with Sukiana, though, I think 0:19:19.640 --> 0:19:22.680 it's like it seems very strategic and I get it. 0:19:22.840 --> 0:19:25.639 And it's like with Charlamagne, and when Charlamagne came out, 0:19:25.680 --> 0:19:28.199 I hated Charlemage. When he first came out there, I 0:19:28.200 --> 0:19:32.480 thought he was gossipy. I remember doing Breakfast Club. I 0:19:32.520 --> 0:19:34.200