1 00:00:03,480 --> 00:00:09,440 Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning. 2 00:00:10,960 --> 00:00:17,080 Speaker 1: This is Laura, Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's 3 00:00:17,120 --> 00:00:20,560 Speaker 1: tip is that if you don't like a plan others 4 00:00:20,600 --> 00:00:26,560 Speaker 1: have developed, you have a responsibility to offer a reasonable alternative. 5 00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:32,000 Speaker 1: You can also set that as an expectation when others 6 00:00:32,640 --> 00:00:40,440 Speaker 1: offer feedback. That is the difference between complaining and being constructive. 7 00:00:43,000 --> 00:00:45,920 Speaker 1: These days, we take it for granted that getting feedback 8 00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:50,080 Speaker 1: is a good thing and that hearing multiple viewpoints helps 9 00:00:50,120 --> 00:00:56,600 Speaker 1: us make better decisions. Often that is true, two heads 10 00:00:56,600 --> 00:01:00,800 Speaker 1: can be better than one, and so forth. But there 11 00:01:00,880 --> 00:01:07,600 Speaker 1: is a difference between constructive feedback and complaining, and unfortunately, 12 00:01:07,760 --> 00:01:12,280 Speaker 1: the latter is quite common, even in situations where the 13 00:01:12,319 --> 00:01:16,760 Speaker 1: plans have involved a lot of work. I am sure 14 00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:21,360 Speaker 1: you have experienced this. Your team labors for weeks to 15 00:01:21,480 --> 00:01:25,360 Speaker 1: draw up programming for your office retreat, and then someone 16 00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:28,800 Speaker 1: spends the whole time complaining that the food was better 17 00:01:28,840 --> 00:01:32,120 Speaker 1: two years ago when it was catered by a restaurant 18 00:01:32,120 --> 00:01:35,160 Speaker 1: that has since gone out of business, and so wasn't 19 00:01:35,200 --> 00:01:40,080 Speaker 1: an option this time around. Anyway, If your neighborhood association 20 00:01:40,319 --> 00:01:43,840 Speaker 1: planned a neighborhood cookout for July fourth, instead of the 21 00:01:43,920 --> 00:01:48,000 Speaker 1: usual Fourth of July bicycle parade. Because your township made 22 00:01:48,040 --> 00:01:50,480 Speaker 1: it a lot harder to get a permit to close roads, 23 00:01:51,360 --> 00:01:54,080 Speaker 1: you will, no doubt hear complaints from families who wanted 24 00:01:54,080 --> 00:01:56,960 Speaker 1: to do things the way the neighborhood has always done it, 25 00:01:57,880 --> 00:02:03,400 Speaker 1: even if that was impossible with municipal bureaucracy. Even in 26 00:02:03,440 --> 00:02:07,160 Speaker 1: our own homes, plans developed by one family member may 27 00:02:07,200 --> 00:02:11,280 Speaker 1: be critiqued by another. If you propose going to the 28 00:02:11,280 --> 00:02:15,280 Speaker 1: amusement park, a proposal that seems like a surefire winner, 29 00:02:16,320 --> 00:02:18,959 Speaker 1: you may get gripes from your kids that they never 30 00:02:18,960 --> 00:02:21,280 Speaker 1: get to go on the fun rides because the little 31 00:02:21,320 --> 00:02:24,200 Speaker 1: siblings are too short for them, or that the nearby 32 00:02:24,240 --> 00:02:26,880 Speaker 1: park is boring and they want to go to one 33 00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:31,520 Speaker 1: that's a three hour drive away, and so forth. But 34 00:02:31,600 --> 00:02:34,560 Speaker 1: whatever the context, when someone has done a lot of 35 00:02:34,600 --> 00:02:37,680 Speaker 1: research and spend a lot of time and effort pulling 36 00:02:37,720 --> 00:02:43,200 Speaker 1: something together, it is not fair to simply oppose the idea. 37 00:02:44,440 --> 00:02:50,600 Speaker 1: Anyone objecting has a responsibility to suggest something reasonable that 38 00:02:50,639 --> 00:02:55,080 Speaker 1: they would be in favor of. Feedback is fine, but 39 00:02:55,160 --> 00:03:00,960 Speaker 1: we need to be constructive, not negative. If an activity gets 40 00:03:01,160 --> 00:03:05,680 Speaker 1: mixed reactions from your kids, you could suggest everyone come 41 00:03:05,760 --> 00:03:08,959 Speaker 1: up with three ideas that they would be excited about 42 00:03:09,560 --> 00:03:13,680 Speaker 1: and see where there's overlap. Maybe there will be. We 43 00:03:13,800 --> 00:03:17,440 Speaker 1: can hope those people objecting to the fourth of July 44 00:03:17,520 --> 00:03:21,720 Speaker 1: cookout they definitely need to take on a leadership role 45 00:03:21,760 --> 00:03:25,120 Speaker 1: in the neighborhood association so they can share their great 46 00:03:25,160 --> 00:03:29,320 Speaker 1: ideas and also put in the sweat equity necessary to 47 00:03:29,440 --> 00:03:34,600 Speaker 1: plan next year and at work. If people have ideas 48 00:03:34,639 --> 00:03:38,520 Speaker 1: for improving things, they definitely should be part of the 49 00:03:38,560 --> 00:03:42,240 Speaker 1: appropriate planning groups and they may take you up on 50 00:03:42,320 --> 00:03:46,080 Speaker 1: that offer, and they will call ten area restaurants next 51 00:03:46,120 --> 00:03:48,520 Speaker 1: time to get bids on the catering and see if 52 00:03:48,520 --> 00:03:52,240 Speaker 1: they can do better, and they might try to get 53 00:03:52,240 --> 00:03:55,640 Speaker 1: out of it. But at least when it is explained 54 00:03:55,720 --> 00:04:00,040 Speaker 1: what is involved, people have a chance to appreciate the 55 00:04:00,120 --> 00:04:05,560 Speaker 1: work that goes into planning and decisions, even if they 56 00:04:05,600 --> 00:04:09,320 Speaker 1: do still pout about it. I am not saying that 57 00:04:09,440 --> 00:04:13,920 Speaker 1: ideas shouldn't be critiqued and that feedback isn't helpful. I 58 00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:17,960 Speaker 1: am just saying that when someone is critiquing, they should 59 00:04:17,960 --> 00:04:21,320 Speaker 1: be asked to offer practical ideas on what can be 60 00:04:21,360 --> 00:04:27,280 Speaker 1: done differently, rather than just complaining or as someone once 61 00:04:27,320 --> 00:04:32,800 Speaker 1: put it all in favor, say I all opposed can 62 00:04:32,839 --> 00:04:37,560 Speaker 1: serve on the committee next time. In the meantime, this 63 00:04:37,720 --> 00:04:42,000 Speaker 1: is Laura. Thanks for listening, and here's to making the 64 00:04:42,040 --> 00:04:51,520 Speaker 1: most of our time. Hey, everybody, I'd love to hear 65 00:04:51,520 --> 00:04:54,360 Speaker 1: from you. You can send me your tips, your questions, 66 00:04:54,440 --> 00:04:55,280 Speaker 1: or anything else. 67 00:04:56,080 --> 00:04:59,600 Speaker 2: Just connect with me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram at 68 00:04:59,640 --> 00:05:04,520 Speaker 2: Before Breakfast pod that's b E the number four, then 69 00:05:04,600 --> 00:05:07,960 Speaker 2: Breakfast p o D. You can also shoot me an 70 00:05:07,960 --> 00:05:12,200 Speaker 2: email at Before Breakfast Podcasts at iHeartMedia dot com. 71 00:05:12,200 --> 00:05:14,720 Speaker 1: That Before Breakfast is spelled out with all the letters. 72 00:05:15,360 --> 00:05:15,960 Speaker 2: Thanks so much. 73 00:05:15,960 --> 00:05:17,440 Speaker 1: Should I look forward to staying in touch. 74 00:05:23,279 --> 00:05:27,320 Speaker 2: Before Breakfast is a production of iHeartRadio. 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