Speaker 1: Start dat Up, Start Up. Brooklyn Boys, Start up, Brooklyn
Speaker 1: Boys start data. They're making noise data up. Episode one.
Speaker 1: This is the Brooklyn Boys Podcast. We are two episodes
Speaker 1: away from playing the Brooklyn Boys are Back in Town? Right,
Speaker 1: because we'll be on next week and then we're gonna
Speaker 1: take off a couple and then we'll be back right
Speaker 1: after the beginning of the year, right, and that's when
Speaker 1: we post vacation. We play are Brooklyn Boys are back
Speaker 1: in town? Fin Lizzie parody? Yes, I can't wait for
Speaker 1: that moment. No, I can wait. I want to enjoy
Speaker 1: my vacation. Well I can I can't. Yeah. I love,
Speaker 1: I mean, I listen, I love doing the podcast, but
Speaker 1: I I mentally I think we everyone needs a break.
Speaker 1: I mean, if if you're lucky enough to get some
Speaker 1: time off, I'm sure you can use the break, you know.
Speaker 1: I'm I'm with you, Broodie. I'm definitely mentally drained. Um.
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm out of things, yeah to talk about. Actually,
Speaker 1: I have something really important to bitch about, and I
Speaker 1: think it would proud of me. All Right, I'm looking here.
Speaker 1: It's I'm not but I'm out of gas. As far
Speaker 1: as wanting to like, like criticize the world. I just
Speaker 1: kind of want to allow. What's that like? Yeah, you
Speaker 1: do you have a list? Do you go through your
Speaker 1: day every single day like criticizing and silently silently judging,
Speaker 1: silently outwardly tweeting. Yes, yeah, I can't get into that.
Speaker 1: I've kept a lot of it to myself. But but
Speaker 1: I really want to start on a positive note. I
Speaker 1: really feel that we've all been through the ringer this
Speaker 1: year and we all need a fresh start. Well, speaking
Speaker 1: of um ranting on social media, my not me Twitter
Speaker 1: account I got banned for a week like a band.
Speaker 1: So here's the good news. Well it's it's good news
Speaker 1: and bad news. The good news is I'm not able
Speaker 1: to tweet angry stuff that I wouldn't normally tweet as me,
Speaker 1: So I'm not I'm not having divulge. What the name
Speaker 1: of this account? Why would I do that? What's the
Speaker 1: point of having a secret account if you tell people
Speaker 1: what it is? Dumb ass? Can't people find you from
Speaker 1: an IP address or track you down somehow? No? No,
Speaker 1: thanks for putting it into people's heads. Maybe maybe I
Speaker 1: should create a secret one myself. No, I'll be honest
Speaker 1: with you, I actually use a separate phone for the
Speaker 1: other account. It's not even on my phone really, I
Speaker 1: have a remember the work phone. I got number of us, right,
Speaker 1: so I use that. It's not trackable, so it's not
Speaker 1: I don't use that. I don't never use my laptop
Speaker 1: four it never use my phone. It's a secondary old
Speaker 1: phone that I use. I wonder how many people are
Speaker 1: listening that have burner accounts on social media, like troll account.
Speaker 1: My point was, if we get back on to the
Speaker 1: point for sec is that of course, So I'm not.
Speaker 1: I'm not. I'm not having the the outlet though, So
Speaker 1: I'm having frustration when I see stuff I want to
Speaker 1: tweet about or tweet at with with my at David
Speaker 1: Rody account and I won't. So I'm sort of like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I want to, right because is it suspended? Suspended? Or
Speaker 1: is he trying to click a link and start the
Speaker 1: seven day countdown? Wow? Now have you ever accidentally tweeted
Speaker 1: on David Brody and Roman count and you said something
Speaker 1: really fucked up? How to pick it back? No? No,
Speaker 1: because it's a process. I have to go to get
Speaker 1: the other phone. Yeah, I don't really delete tweets. I'm
Speaker 1: pretty methodical about before I put stuff out in the
Speaker 1: social media world, about actually keeping it there, because everything
Speaker 1: that I put forward I mean to put out there.
Speaker 1: I don't ever cancel a picture. Do you ever, like
Speaker 1: just like you taken down pictures. I'm sure, Well, if
Speaker 1: stuff expires, if it doesn't make any sense. I've never
Speaker 1: been you know, I've never been bullied into removing shit
Speaker 1: my social tweet. I did once tweet my thoughts through
Speaker 1: the Elvis Star and Show account by accident. Oh yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I think I've done that. And then I and then
Speaker 1: somebody immediately texted me and said who wrote this? Ops? Oops,
Speaker 1: that was me? That was me. That was me. But no,
Speaker 1: not my not my house, No, no, no, I don't
Speaker 1: use it very often. Every once in a while I go,
Speaker 1: you know, I got a disturbing texture, even the least
Speaker 1: curious like band. Oh, you're not gonna tell me it's
Speaker 1: all limits. You just you just finished saying how you'll
Speaker 1: never say what the account was or what you say
Speaker 1: on there. So no, I'm not going to use the
Speaker 1: exact words. I can just imagine what you said. I
Speaker 1: I was. I used a bad word about a person
Speaker 1: I don't like in the public eye. Okay, but I
Speaker 1: accidentally hit reply and that person was on, like his
Speaker 1: Twitter address was in the reply, so that that person
Speaker 1: may have reported the tweet. Someone in the public eye.
Speaker 1: The person you can't you see see the person. You
Speaker 1: broke your own rule, hold on, hold on on, you
Speaker 1: know me. Normally I hit reply. I must have accidentally
Speaker 1: hit reply all and I said, oh that persons and
Speaker 1: I used, I use a couple of bad words, and
Speaker 1: I guess that person I didn't like my commentary and
Speaker 1: reported me. It's not a famous person as much as
Speaker 1: it's someone. Uh, it's somebody. So whatever the case, I
Speaker 1: have a week starting this morning. I think Brodie gets
Speaker 1: his jollys off of this kind of thing. I love it.
Speaker 1: And by the way, the guy deserved he's definitely definitely
Speaker 1: what I called him. But listen to you, fucking keyboard cowboy.
Speaker 1: Well listen, there's the it's the first, it's the second time.
Speaker 1: The last time I got it got suspended a twenty
Speaker 1: four hours. Oh, and then the second offense is seven day.
Speaker 1: I would say, the first four times it got suspended,
Speaker 1: that's like rolling through the easy pass. Uh at you
Speaker 1: know when it's fifteen and they keep sending you in
Speaker 1: the mail. They said, we're gonna suspend your easy pass.
Speaker 1: We're gonna suspend your easy pass. We're gonna and then
Speaker 1: they finally do it. Um, you got the week, and
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't know if it's a week because
Speaker 1: of so many hours bands or if it was because
Speaker 1: what I said was worth a week. It wasn't anything like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, it was just like I got. I
Speaker 1: got a disturbing text from my sister today. Remember a
Speaker 1: few months ago, keep breaking up with you? Yeah, my
Speaker 1: sister she's had it. I bet she we're fighting over
Speaker 1: the custody of the kids. Yeah, my sister, uh said,
Speaker 1: So my friend is recently divorced and she's on the
Speaker 1: dating market again and she's on J Date. You know
Speaker 1: where this is going. She wants to know if you
Speaker 1: have any Jewish friends. Well no, she wanted a half right. No.
Speaker 1: She screenshot the guy who fucking stole my picture and
Speaker 1: turned my name as thirty seven year old Arthur and
Speaker 1: it's still up on J Date. The bastard was online
Speaker 1: today and my sister's friend said, that looks like scary.
Speaker 1: So my sister Jennifer says, she texts Jews are on
Speaker 1: j date that she keeps find everyone finds this guy.
Speaker 1: It's local, the guys in the New York area, and
Speaker 1: she is doing so we need our listeners to go female.
Speaker 1: We need a female listener in the New York area.
Speaker 1: You don't even have to be Jewish. I didn't say that.
Speaker 1: A female listener in the New You can pretend to
Speaker 1: be Jewish. And and uh, scary, what's our email Brooklyn
Speaker 1: Boys the Brooklyn Boys Podcast at gmail dot com. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I can never remember that, so um uh And and
Speaker 1: we'll email you the link to a guy. Scary. We'll
Speaker 1: hook you up and see if you can interact with
Speaker 1: the guy and get his phone number for us. Well,
Speaker 1: I don't know if I have the link. I just
Speaker 1: got a screenshot. The guy's name is Arthur, thirty seven
Speaker 1: years old in the New York area, and he's a
Speaker 1: doctor he or so he says, And he stole the
Speaker 1: picture of me in Barcelona last year. We talked about
Speaker 1: this on this podcast, and at the time I thought
Speaker 1: we got it successfully removed because several of our listeners
Speaker 1: saw it. But turns out my sister's friend who I
Speaker 1: haven't seen years saw it and says, oh my God,
Speaker 1: that's Jennifer's brother and she texts my sister. My sisters like, um,
Speaker 1: are you leading a double life? And I'm like, come on,
Speaker 1: jen like she stored for a quick second, then maybe
Speaker 1: I'm actually trying to pick up Jewish women on J Date,
Speaker 1: maybe because of my affinity for Jewish food. If you
Speaker 1: listen to the last episode, right, I love it. But
Speaker 1: I'll tell I'll tell you this though, Brodie. Uh my sister, Um,
Speaker 1: I told I told my sister to tell her to
Speaker 1: write a skating email back to this asshole, say get
Speaker 1: your fucking picture, Debt, get this picture down now. It's
Speaker 1: a copyright infringement. This person is a known, per local
Speaker 1: person that that people know who they are. I'm reporting
Speaker 1: you to J Date and I'm gonna report you to
Speaker 1: your wife because we all know that the guy is
Speaker 1: hiding something and it's probably the fact that he has
Speaker 1: a wife and kids. Okay, so why don't you report him?
Speaker 1: Arthur seven. I don't know how to do it, but
Speaker 1: he's back. He's back, this asshole. Now. Now, look, you
Speaker 1: have had a lot of doppelgangers, and we've come across
Speaker 1: a bunch of people that look just like you. What
Speaker 1: if this guy is one of those guys like the
Speaker 1: guy who works in Hoboken in the restroom now, because
Speaker 1: he clearly took my picture of Instagram. I know that
Speaker 1: I was standing on a roof of church and Barcelona
Speaker 1: when I took that picture. I know. But what I'm
Speaker 1: saying is, slow down. Is that some girl is going
Speaker 1: to show up to a date with him, right, He's
Speaker 1: got to look something like the picture. So it's what
Speaker 1: if it's one of the three or four people in
Speaker 1: the area we know looks like you, so that when
Speaker 1: the girl shows up, they're like, oh, yeah, it looks
Speaker 1: like it's plausible. That's what I'm saying. But it's gotta
Speaker 1: be he's gotta be going. You put your best foot forward.
Speaker 1: He's got to look I don't know. Well to that guy, um,
Speaker 1: and congratulations to us. We waded to number six on
Speaker 1: ther Radio six Top one hundred Podcasts of the Week.
Speaker 1: Not an easy people, scary. Do you know how many
Speaker 1: podcasts I Heart radio has? How many number six? How many?
Speaker 1: Take a guess, I think six hundred siodcasts, maybe more thousands,
Speaker 1: two hundred and fifty thousand podcasts, Heart Originals two fifty
Speaker 1: thousand podcasts are carried back number six for the week
Speaker 1: of Thanksgiving. That's a compliment. I have to assume. Well, no, no,
Speaker 1: let me rephrase that it was for the week after Thanksgiving.
Speaker 1: It was last week, right, So that means it's the
Speaker 1: episode we posted a Thanksgiving that carried over the weekend
Speaker 1: and we had a huge Monday after Thanksgiving crappy Thanksgiving episode,
Speaker 1: and then our new episode had to have also been huge,
Speaker 1: which it was, but not like the crappy Thanksgiving. Now
Speaker 1: it's only downhill from here. But we're yeah, we're gonna
Speaker 1: finish circle jerking ourselves off here in a second. Um,
Speaker 1: But there's a point to this speaking a circle jerking
Speaker 1: ourselves off. We're not going to talk about Brooken Boys
Speaker 1: merchandise till the end because there's a couple of things
Speaker 1: I want to mention. I've been doing it up front,
Speaker 1: and I don't want to make a commercial. There's no commercials.
Speaker 1: We didn't pay ourselves to plug our merchandise. Brooklyn Boys,
Speaker 1: that big cartel dot com, that's Brooknoy big dot So
Speaker 1: I will say this. I I listened, i was inspired.
Speaker 1: I'm like, well, let's see who the competition is. And
Speaker 1: I listened to some of the podcasts in the top
Speaker 1: ten no names full, just awful. How do some of
Speaker 1: the podcasts amass the audience numbers that they get when
Speaker 1: they are dead pan nerds that are on a podcast
Speaker 1: like they do? You know, you know, we all know
Speaker 1: the shweaty Balls sketch from s now, which is supposed
Speaker 1: to be like National, like NPR, like National Hublic Radio,
Speaker 1: in the Alec Baldwin sketch with the two women who
Speaker 1: I can already answer hold on and then I'm just
Speaker 1: painting a picture and they talk like this, So that
Speaker 1: sketch epitomizes what most podcasts are, not not all of them,
Speaker 1: but this one, not this certainly not this one. We
Speaker 1: do not sound like he me through the vents. We
Speaker 1: don't sound like any other fucking podcast. First of all,
Speaker 1: we're talking to you. We're it's like we're in a
Speaker 1: conversation with you in your car or wherever you're your
Speaker 1: air pods, whatever you're listening. But I will say that
Speaker 1: there's a lot of these they're talking at you. It's
Speaker 1: like they're reading from a fucking script. And I'm not
Speaker 1: talking about the podcasts that are fictional or their drama series,
Speaker 1: or you're listening to like like scripted drama or stuff.
Speaker 1: I'm talking about the These are podcasts I listened to
Speaker 1: that are just fly by the seat of your pants,
Speaker 1: off the cuff podcasts. And while the titles may sound like, oh,
Speaker 1: maybe I want to hear a little bit more about this,
Speaker 1: I listened to Brodie. I listened to thirty minutes of
Speaker 1: one of them, and I was trying to find the
Speaker 1: silver lining. I'm like, what do people sing in this?
Speaker 1: What do people singing in this? You were so upset
Speaker 1: you texted me. I was angry, and you broke one
Speaker 1: of my rules that we've talked about on the podcast.
Speaker 1: You texted me, what even are these podcasts? Well, I
Speaker 1: sound like a sixteen year old girl when I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: what even are they? I was today years old when
Speaker 1: I found out that a lot of the podcasts that
Speaker 1: we are competitions suck. They do. Speaking of you said,
Speaker 1: nobody sounds like this podcast. I'm a little nervous. I'll
Speaker 1: tell you why. I'll tell you what. I sent you
Speaker 1: a link to a podcast. I don't even know where
Speaker 1: it is. I don't know if I emailed you or
Speaker 1: I alright sent you the link but we've talked about
Speaker 1: the the Sex podcast. I'll go ahead and say it.
Speaker 1: Call Her Daddy, which did I talk about last week?
Speaker 1: It's in the comedy section. Yeah, I don't know if
Speaker 1: you talked about it. It's absolutely absolutely belongs in the
Speaker 1: comedy section. Okay. On the I Heart Radio Comedy section,
Speaker 1: when you click on comedy, there's about twenty podcast listed
Speaker 1: they recommend for comedy podcasts. We are the seventh. We're
Speaker 1: listed seventh, right because I had to move us up
Speaker 1: from fourteen. It's like, hey, why are we fourteen? We're awesome, Like,
Speaker 1: you're right your seventh. It's our company. So I was like, wow,
Speaker 1: what is it? So um? The reason I mentioned sounding
Speaker 1: like other people, I sent scary a link? Did I?
Speaker 1: Did I text your email you? I don't know what's
Speaker 1: trying to find I don't even think I opened it. Okay,
Speaker 1: it was a podcast. I saw it on Instagram. It
Speaker 1: was in my like things it might like, you know,
Speaker 1: the discovery page, and it was two hot girls sitting
Speaker 1: on the mic in bikinis doing a podcast about dating
Speaker 1: and banging and screwing and sucking and all that stuff.
Speaker 1: See I listened to that. That's interesting to me. But
Speaker 1: my point was it was like it was like, uh,
Speaker 1: call Grandpa, like it was. It was as close to
Speaker 1: the original thing, and I look, oh it was. I
Speaker 1: knew what it was. It was a rip off. It
Speaker 1: was a rip off of Call or Daddy. Right now.
Speaker 1: I understand you want to get your own niche right,
Speaker 1: but I feel like, you know, look this coke, this
Speaker 1: PEPSI I get it right. You can have two in
Speaker 1: the market. I don't know if there's other podcasts exactly,
Speaker 1: but this was I didn't listen to the whole thing.
Speaker 1: It's just whatever the one minute clip. I'm waiting for
Speaker 1: somebody to come out with the Jersey Boys or the
Speaker 1: you know, there's there's two idiots who're gonna go like, oh,
Speaker 1: we could do that. Of course, there are people listening
Speaker 1: right now that are like, all I need is the equipment. Yeah,
Speaker 1: good luck. I had somebody tagged me on my Facebook
Speaker 1: page friend of mine whose friend wants to do a podcast.
Speaker 1: So the friend was like, I don't know what I
Speaker 1: want to do a podcast? What do I need to do? Well,
Speaker 1: first of all, you need to know what to do, right,
Speaker 1: You can't I'm gonna do a podcast. So I was
Speaker 1: like gonna So she tagged me, like, can you help
Speaker 1: my friend out? Like, tell to do a podcast? Well,
Speaker 1: there's a technical way to do a podcast. What kind
Speaker 1: of mike, what kind of audio? That's easy, that's stuff
Speaker 1: that that that's checklist stuff. You can all google. Get
Speaker 1: yourself on a good on on a small budget, get
Speaker 1: yourself up and running to do a podcast physically, and
Speaker 1: then feed it to a a company and uploading company
Speaker 1: and then they'll and they'll distribute it. You could be
Speaker 1: on I Heart Radio with us. There's no, it's not
Speaker 1: very difficult to do if you want to. Actually, but
Speaker 1: that's right away. Well yeah, but no, but I'm brody.
Speaker 1: But others, there are other Apple podcasts, there are other
Speaker 1: companies that will take you. I'm not talking about that.
Speaker 1: That's the easy stuff. That's the easy stuff, right. The
Speaker 1: hard thing is actually what comes out of your mouth
Speaker 1: and what are you gonna talk about? And how do
Speaker 1: you engage you hold an audience? Well, miserably here in
Speaker 1: the first good a good friend of mine, I had
Speaker 1: two buddies, the three of them want to do a podcast. Yeah, right,
Speaker 1: they had a thing they wanted to talk about, an angle.
Speaker 1: They're all funny guys. Right, so you tell me when
Speaker 1: you stop me, when you hear the mistake. Okay, the
Speaker 1: three of them equally chipped in for an expensive microphone,
Speaker 1: you're not gonna stop me. Okay, equally for an expensive
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna stop you because I support that. No,
Speaker 1: you can't. You can't chip chip in three ways chipping well,
Speaker 1: you know they chip in for what they're all sharing
Speaker 1: the same microphone. Like three guys an omnidirectional my phone,
Speaker 1: that's gonna sound awful, well, but you can it can
Speaker 1: sound okay like the microphones back three guys in the
Speaker 1: circle or try. The point is like when I was
Speaker 1: in a comedy group. There was five of us. We
Speaker 1: chipped in together to buy a big sound system with
Speaker 1: wireless microphones and everything, which was fine for three or
Speaker 1: four years, and then when one guy wanted to leave
Speaker 1: the group, you have to buy out. Then you have
Speaker 1: to find a guy who wants to join the group
Speaker 1: or a woman who wants to buy into that sound system,
Speaker 1: just ship all the time, and then have to sell
Speaker 1: their portions off. So you're trying to say, when the
Speaker 1: podcast goes belly up, who gets the podcast went belly up?
Speaker 1: After two attempted episodes. They never posted who got who
Speaker 1: kept the mic? Well, that was a big discussion. None
Speaker 1: of them wanted it. None of them wanted it, and
Speaker 1: they should give it to you. Your Mike was crackling
Speaker 1: on the fifteen minute morning the other day. It wasn't
Speaker 1: the mike. I was using the phone because you sucked
Speaker 1: me again. You sucked me on the whole. That's irrelevant. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: you already know what you did. You know what you did.
Speaker 1: Continue continue quick update fantasy football. I made the playoffs.
Speaker 1: Oh congratulations, in all three of my leagues. Beat the
Speaker 1: guy that does nothing, the guy that doesn't. Well, here's
Speaker 1: the thing. I needed him to win this week because
Speaker 1: I need I had to beat him last week, and
Speaker 1: then I needed him to win this week because the
Speaker 1: other person he was playing needed to lose so I
Speaker 1: can make the playoffs. So I pumped him up. I'm like, dude,
Speaker 1: let's go. You gotta win this, let's go. Meanwhile, meanwhile,
Speaker 1: he was like, I lost. I'm out of it. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna your Your season hangs in the balances and depends
Speaker 1: on other people winning. You're losing. Doesn't sound like you're
Speaker 1: a real champion. There Brodie hold On, I'm a champion
Speaker 1: of other two. I play and not listen in the league.
Speaker 1: In the league, in the Q one four three to
Speaker 1: classic rock, right, YEA for a guy who studies this
Speaker 1: shift On, I do study, but he is a problem.
Speaker 1: He has the problem. The two divisions six teams and
Speaker 1: six teams. In the other division, there were two good
Speaker 1: teams and three good teams and three stinkers. In my division,
Speaker 1: there was one stinker. Uh well, I mean he wasn't
Speaker 1: a stinker, but he didn't do well. Tom Pulman, Senior
Speaker 1: vice president of Programming fi Heart Radio. He had a
Speaker 1: bad season and he's a great player. The other five
Speaker 1: of us are in a five way tie for first,
Speaker 1: which gets decided by points, which leads me to believe
Speaker 1: that a lot of the fantasy football is luck. It's
Speaker 1: skill to a point, it's all your homework and re searching.
Speaker 1: Because the good players all got tied. The bad players
Speaker 1: are like two and nine that a jetman. Jetman won
Speaker 1: two games. He's two and eleven. If he was a
Speaker 1: real Jetman, he'd beat So there were a couple of
Speaker 1: teams that were like, you know, two and eleven, three
Speaker 1: and ten, and the rest of us all like beat
Speaker 1: up on them. So with five of us in the
Speaker 1: same division have the same record, My point was I
Speaker 1: now had to root for the guy that I beat
Speaker 1: and had to motivate him even though I knocked him
Speaker 1: out of the playoffs to care this week. So thank
Speaker 1: you guy for caring so that you could beat the
Speaker 1: other guy. And I'm in the playoffs. Sore you go.
Speaker 1: I wanted my money back. There's uh. I gotta say, my, my, my, my,
Speaker 1: my palms are all sweaty here, mom, spaghetti sweater already already, Yeah,
Speaker 1: it happened already because and I'm getting all nervous because
Speaker 1: we have now not one, but two weeks of sound
Speaker 1: that we haven't played. I feel like we should just
Speaker 1: get get it off our plate, right, all right, let's
Speaker 1: do the sound. So let me pull up my list.
Speaker 1: We had some lot of clips, A lot of clips,
Speaker 1: A lot of clips, A lot of clips. Some of
Speaker 1: the best clips. You love it here the greatest clips.
Speaker 1: Not a lot of clips. Have no one's have had
Speaker 1: clips like this before. All right, so let's do um
Speaker 1: let's do the unit one. You have the Unit one
Speaker 1: I have? Yes, I do, Yeah, Okay, I want you
Speaker 1: to listen. The newscaster gets it right the first time,
Speaker 1: then fox it up the second time. Yeah, well, I
Speaker 1: know where he putting out of space and the I
Speaker 1: c U s are filling up and it's against that
Speaker 1: backdrop that k S d K, the local NBC affiliate
Speaker 1: in St. Louis, got exclusive access to the COVID I
Speaker 1: see you unit at Merst Intensive Care Unit Unit redundancy
Speaker 1: that redundancy alert. Do you have the Fear of the
Speaker 1: Walking Dead clip? Yes? Okay. Now I don't know if
Speaker 1: this was delibered or not. Maybe I'm reading into it.
Speaker 1: There's a eight character on the show. Okay, his name
Speaker 1: is Felix. This is not Fear of Walking toad him. Sorry.
Speaker 1: The Walking Dead World Beyond, which by the way, was
Speaker 1: ten episodes. It's only two seasons. The first six episodes
Speaker 1: were horrifically bad. Seven and eight we're okay, and nine
Speaker 1: and ten we're pretty good. This was one either nine
Speaker 1: or ten, but you you gotta suffer through the first
Speaker 1: six episodes. It's so bad. Anyway. He's talking about a truck.
Speaker 1: So one of the girls, the lead girls on the show,
Speaker 1: gets in the truck and she's gonna try to drive
Speaker 1: the truck and he's telling her why she can't drive
Speaker 1: the truck. I want you to tell me what the
Speaker 1: guy is saying to her. Go ahead to cap it off. No,
Speaker 1: that's not the clip. Okay, well it's not labeled. It's
Speaker 1: called this thing. Got you? Yeah, I got you? All right? Okay,
Speaker 1: why don't you mean what you say? And say what
Speaker 1: you mean? I'll try. This thing is stick. I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna be able to put my foot down on that clutch. Okay,
Speaker 1: what do you say? Meg alauda cake as it goes?
Speaker 1: But people could turn up their headphones one time. It's
Speaker 1: why he can't drive. She can't drive the car. He can't.
Speaker 1: This thing is dick. This thing is dick. This thing
Speaker 1: is dick. Did you say that? Yeah? Now he's gay
Speaker 1: in real life also, And I'm not saying that's why
Speaker 1: he said it. I just left a little harder because
Speaker 1: I know he well he's he's multi sexual. But I've
Speaker 1: never heard the word used in that. Well, what do
Speaker 1: he was Okay, what he was saying was this thing.
Speaker 1: You know what he was saying was this thing is stick.
Speaker 1: It's a stick shift. He couldn't put his foot down
Speaker 1: on the clutch. Because he had his ankle sliced open.
Speaker 1: Spoilers right, he's saying this thing is stick, but he's
Speaker 1: saying this thing is stick, but it sounds like this
Speaker 1: thing is dick, which also, I would think he could
Speaker 1: drive the truck. Then I think you'd want to drive
Speaker 1: the truck. I have blanket here. Oh okay again, this
Speaker 1: is a commercial where the woman says it right the
Speaker 1: first time and then fox it up the second time. Notch,
Speaker 1: my Notch comforter is made from all natural eucalyptus and
Speaker 1: is hypoallergenic, which means a healthy night's sleep for me
Speaker 1: and my kiddos. It pulls me on the warm nights
Speaker 1: and keeps me warm on the cool nights. And I
Speaker 1: love that Notch is non toxic. Sheets are luxury hotel grade.
Speaker 1: It's made with me and my family's well being in mind.
Speaker 1: Sleep clean at fine dot com. No, it's my and
Speaker 1: my family's well being. You wouldn't say it's made for
Speaker 1: me well being. She said, it's it's great for me
Speaker 1: and my family, which is correct, But then she says,
Speaker 1: then she says, it's with me and my family's intentions
Speaker 1: in mind. You wouldn't say me intentions. That's crazy because
Speaker 1: that's a prerecorded commercial. They could have actually right proof
Speaker 1: red right. I don't I don't know what this clip is,
Speaker 1: but it's called nightmare. So to calf it Off, carl
Speaker 1: stop up, sup ups up. So the announcer is saying
Speaker 1: that the play was so bad it's like a nightmare.
Speaker 1: But then he has like diarrhea of the mouth and
Speaker 1: he says something that makes no sense. That's for twenty
Speaker 1: minutes each week, I hear you. So to calp it
Speaker 1: Off and Carlton Davis, right now we're going is this
Speaker 1: a nightmare? Wake me up for baby? Don't wake me up?
Speaker 1: With the pH is good? What does that mean? He's
Speaker 1: living in it. He's in a nightmare, and he's like,
Speaker 1: wake me up or maybe don't wake me up? Good?
Speaker 1: Is that like a kick he kicked point after the
Speaker 1: well if you say the guys living a nightmare because
Speaker 1: he had just had an awful play. Then he goes
Speaker 1: he's got to be thinking wake me up or maybe
Speaker 1: don't wake me up? As if that was a punchline.
Speaker 1: If you're having a nightmare, why would you not want
Speaker 1: to wake you up? To calp it Off and Carlton Davis.
Speaker 1: Right now, we're going, is this a nightmare? Wake me up? Don't? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I think he just got lost in his words. Sounds
Speaker 1: like a college announcer there, yeah, but no, it was
Speaker 1: like Fox Game of the Week. It was like a major,
Speaker 1: major announcer. He said, wake me up, or maybe don't
Speaker 1: wake me up? Whoa heyw Does that mean? Let's get
Speaker 1: to the fun stuff with Jimmy Fallon because last week
Speaker 1: we talked about this on this podcast. Okay, well I
Speaker 1: have a clip before what we talked about, so let
Speaker 1: me just do the first clip again. Want to set
Speaker 1: set the record straight. Love Jimmy Fallon. Jimmy Fallon is
Speaker 1: a native New Yorker. Granted sgridis upstate New York, not
Speaker 1: New York City, but this is one you have to
Speaker 1: know now. And he follows me on Twitter, and he
Speaker 1: follows me as well, and pissed, No he doesn't follow you,
Speaker 1: does he? Yes? He does, of course he does, Jimmy,
Speaker 1: and we go we've tweeted back and forth. I love Jimmy.
Speaker 1: I thought you were upset last time because I follows me. An, no,
Speaker 1: it must be somebody else. Jimmy follows me anyway, And
Speaker 1: and Fallon Tonight follows me and Colbert Show follows me. Anyway,
Speaker 1: isn't it so if you're from our neighborho in Brooklyn,
Speaker 1: there's a bridge with a proper pronunciation of vera Zano,
Speaker 1: vera Zona. We talked about it last week. We managed
Speaker 1: one rocking on the video. Right, it's again it's I
Speaker 1: think it's the second largest spension bridge in America, one
Speaker 1: of the what used to be one of the longest
Speaker 1: in the world. It's just it's not pretty and it's
Speaker 1: not it connects two things nobody can't like. It's not like,
Speaker 1: it's not Manhattan Bridge Bridge. It's not right. But it's
Speaker 1: Brooklyn and Staten Island and from New York. It's a
Speaker 1: big bridge. Okay, some people in Brooklyn mispronounce it. They
Speaker 1: put an end in the middle of the word that
Speaker 1: isn't there. We've talked about it on this podcast. Fallon
Speaker 1: play the clip what are you doing? Finally here in
Speaker 1: New York they had to close the Verenzano bridge this
Speaker 1: he said, veron Zano. There is no end. It's vera.
Speaker 1: People think that it's I'm gonna sneeze covid, covid. It's
Speaker 1: like saying, yeah, brun Clinton, you put it in the
Speaker 1: middle of it. Yeah, but a lot of people do
Speaker 1: that common machique. I'll get the thing. I have a question.
Speaker 1: Does that make him more of a New Yorker for
Speaker 1: getting it wrong like New Yorkers do or less of
Speaker 1: a New Yorker for getting it wrong? Yea, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: maybe more use you've been here forever. So one of
Speaker 1: the things I read last week was my add a
Speaker 1: word ruin a Christmas carol or Christmas song. Right. I
Speaker 1: read them last week and I said to you, it
Speaker 1: wasn't change a word. It was added a word. But
Speaker 1: when Jimmy read them on the air, he read two
Speaker 1: that will change your word, because, as we know in
Speaker 1: the rules of comedy, funny is funny. He's just gonna
Speaker 1: you're not funny if you have to cheat. Anyway, I
Speaker 1: submitted one which I read on the podcast before the aird,
Speaker 1: which was uh, little drummer Boy George. Yeah. I also
Speaker 1: submitted Little Caesar's drummer Boy play the Mark Hamil clip, who,
Speaker 1: by the way, follows me on Twitter, and I've gone
Speaker 1: into back with a hundred times. Go ahead, this next one.
Speaker 1: This is so cool. Sex one is from actual Mark Hamill. Look, Skywatcher,
Speaker 1: Joker everything that guys. I love him, man, he's super
Speaker 1: funny too. Man, Mark Hamill, I love you, man, he
Speaker 1: says little drummer boyd George. Yeah, I would listen to that.
Speaker 1: So my guest is that Mark Hamill, who follows you
Speaker 1: on Twitter, saw you write that, and then he stole it,
Speaker 1: gave it to Jimmy and said, here's my idea. No, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: why not, Brodie is Mark Hamilt? Because Mark Hamill tweeted
Speaker 1: it before I did. I looked, okay, Well, I also
Speaker 1: read a couple here that I was reading through Twitter,
Speaker 1: and it seems like Jimmy picked up on them. Because
Speaker 1: play the Christmas song one. This is great. You read
Speaker 1: this one, he says away in a pred of Manger.
Speaker 1: The Major is a sandwich shop here in New York City.
Speaker 1: But were the fancy name but old food? Okay? And
Speaker 1: I thought I got excited, scary because I thought you
Speaker 1: wrote that off top of your head, like you made
Speaker 1: that one up, all right? And now we have best
Speaker 1: bike Yeah, and that's it. No, we have the last one.
Speaker 1: I sent you the fifth clip. Remember, I can play
Speaker 1: it off problem. Yeah, it's a problem. I'll play off
Speaker 1: my phone. Okay, okay, so I'm trying to remember what
Speaker 1: was wrong in this clip. But play the clip and
Speaker 1: I'll remember what's wrong. Your best buy Me and Piggy
Speaker 1: have been saving up for a long time to get
Speaker 1: the right laptop again, dear best Buy, me and Piggy
Speaker 1: have been saving up for it. It's Piggy and me
Speaker 1: or Piggy and I and I. I've been saving up
Speaker 1: me and Piggy's been saving up. This wasn't like a
Speaker 1: little little child in the commer. But this is how people.
Speaker 1: This is how people talking, is how people write. Somebody
Speaker 1: gets paid to write commercials. I know, I get that,
Speaker 1: and they get two woman is an adult, and some
Speaker 1: people get paid. Some people get paid to write commercials. Colloquial, colloquially,
Speaker 1: the way people colloquially, colloquially, the way people speak. I
Speaker 1: can't say that colloquially the way people talk. And they
Speaker 1: didn't stick up for the blanket lady, then you know what,
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna stick up for the blanket lady. I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna stick up for Jimmy Fallon making a mistake
Speaker 1: on Varenzano. Because people do Why are you sticking up
Speaker 1: for the main piggy lady. I don't care about the
Speaker 1: blanket lady either. Yeah, car, all right, So I came
Speaker 1: home and I just checked my messages. That's why the
Speaker 1: clips not loaded. I'm gonna played off my phone. I
Speaker 1: do that, and then we got to right, I got
Speaker 1: a warning message, right something somebody my credit card was
Speaker 1: hacked allegedly. I want you to try to figure out
Speaker 1: where in this message I figured out something was not real.
Speaker 1: Hold on, here we go. We have found some suspicious
Speaker 1: activity in your Amazon account and order has been placed
Speaker 1: from your Amazon account and the card linked to your
Speaker 1: account has been for three hundred and if you have
Speaker 1: done placed, press one to speak to the fraud department
Speaker 1: to cancel and urgently. Thanks for your time. Have nice,
Speaker 1: have nice day ahead, and the fact that you would
Speaker 1: never be caught dead with an iPhone. Right here we go,
Speaker 1: I have nice, have a nice day. Somebody went to
Speaker 1: a lot of trouble to script that out right, probably
Speaker 1: the best Buy commercial writer and uh or the blanket
Speaker 1: They got to twenty six seconds into the call, flying
Speaker 1: you know what. It was a robot, but it sounded
Speaker 1: it sounded like to an idiot, legitimate, like just some
Speaker 1: old person. It was like, oh, iPhone, but then they
Speaker 1: have nice day like you blew it. The talk we
Speaker 1: have nice day for you is good? Well, all right,
Speaker 1: we have a lot more coming up. We have a
Speaker 1: nice day ahead. Nice days. You said you had a
Speaker 1: story for me. I was going to be proud of you.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, right. I had a problem with grub hub
Speaker 1: this week and I said, you need my help. I
Speaker 1: did at the time, which is why I called you, okay,
Speaker 1: but you didn't answer the phone and I handled it
Speaker 1: on my own. You called me during the afternoon naptime.
Speaker 1: So I had a I had a gift card to
Speaker 1: use because some of us essential workers are coming in
Speaker 1: every single day to the radio station. And one of
Speaker 1: the heads of sales said, you know what, everybody who's
Speaker 1: an essential worker who's been here, we want to buy
Speaker 1: you dinner on us or lunch or whatever it is.
Speaker 1: Here's a hundred dollar a hundred dollar gift card that
Speaker 1: you can use its seamless. I'm like, this is great.
Speaker 1: So I said to myself, I'm getting I'm going up
Speaker 1: for a five star meal because it's a hundred dollars.
Speaker 1: So what do I do I order up from this
Speaker 1: this place, and I'm realizing, oh my god, I live
Speaker 1: in Jersey on the other side of the Holland Tunnel,
Speaker 1: and five minutes away on the other side is one
Speaker 1: of our great friend and chefs, Josh Capon, who has
Speaker 1: this place Lure, not a sponsor, And I'm like, and
Speaker 1: his food is very expensive because it's a fine Manhattan
Speaker 1: dining establishment, but because I got this money for free
Speaker 1: funk that I'm going to order from there. But more importantly,
Speaker 1: normally they don't deliver through the tunnel because I live
Speaker 1: on one side of the tunnel and this restaurants on
Speaker 1: the other side, and and I'm like, well, it's coming up.
Speaker 1: It's not it's not disallowing me, so I guess I
Speaker 1: can order from here. So I get so excited. I
Speaker 1: one of my favorite dishes from this restaurant that I
Speaker 1: normally it's a treat to go to because I'm it's
Speaker 1: usually when I'm out to eat, and I'm like, oh
Speaker 1: my god, it's gonna come to my house. It's so great.
Speaker 1: And the food all of a sudden gets processed and
Speaker 1: then it shows you. You know, they show you the
Speaker 1: mixing bowl and they show you the graphics of them
Speaker 1: pouring ingredients in. It's like your food is being prepared.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, yes, they accepted, they accepted the order.
Speaker 1: They're cooking for me. And then they show okay, let's
Speaker 1: call him Shamous. It's on your way to the restaurant
Speaker 1: to pick up the order. Not you're not his real name. Okay,
Speaker 1: but okay, so are you gonna do the Irish accent?
Speaker 1: Or is he not Irish? He was not Irish. I'm
Speaker 1: just I'm mixing up the whole thing on purpose in
Speaker 1: case the guy with the name not Jamis is listening
Speaker 1: to the podcast, right, So, so Shamus is on his
Speaker 1: way to the restaurant. They show a picture of Shamus
Speaker 1: and I'm like, oh my god. And it's gonna be
Speaker 1: here ahead of ahead of schedule. It says it's gonna
Speaker 1: be an hour. We have a little green suit on
Speaker 1: in a big green top. Minutes in your food. No,
Speaker 1: the guy did this guy is not? This guy was Spanish?
Speaker 1: Did not understand it? Hispanic? Hispanic Spain? No, he was
Speaker 1: not from Spain. Doubtful, doubtful. So all of a sudden,
Speaker 1: it shows him picking up the order, and then it
Speaker 1: shows you the little like trail. The map, the track
Speaker 1: shows you going. He's going from the restaurant and he
Speaker 1: goes right up to the Holland Tunnel and you see
Speaker 1: him right at the foot of the Holland Tunnel and
Speaker 1: then he stops. I'm like, oh my god, did the
Speaker 1: app freest Oh my god, let me reset it. Let
Speaker 1: me reset the app. Reset the app, refresh, refresh. No.
Speaker 1: Fifteen minutes goes by. He's sitting at the foot of
Speaker 1: the don't. I'm like, what the fox is going on? Shamus,
Speaker 1: where's my food? Just come through the tunnel. Maybe that's
Speaker 1: maybe this traffic in the tunnel shod All of a
Speaker 1: sudden coming my phone rings unknown number probably and I
Speaker 1: get it and it's Shamus and he goes hello. I'm
Speaker 1: like hi. He goes, no, New Jersey and I'm like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I live in New Jersey. Yeah this isn't Shamus. Go ahead,
Speaker 1: there's no New Jersey. And I'm like, no, I live
Speaker 1: in New Jersey. I'm like Jersey. He goes, no, can deliver. No,
Speaker 1: I said, are you want to bike? Like, what's going on? No,
Speaker 1: I'm in a car. I'm in car. No Jersey. He goes, uh, goodbye.
Speaker 1: He hangs up on me. By the way, if you're
Speaker 1: doing a broken English from someone who speaks Spanish, this
Speaker 1: is I'm not trying. I'm not trying to do any accent.
Speaker 1: I don't want to. But but the way you're breaking
Speaker 1: up English is not from someone who speaks The point
Speaker 1: is Shamus then passes the order on it, says like,
Speaker 1: apparently there's this auto thing that you can press a
Speaker 1: button with seeing us and all of a sudden they
Speaker 1: could say, uh, you could tell them boom, I am
Speaker 1: not avail. You know, I'm not available to make this order.
Speaker 1: Make somebody else do it. Next thing, you know, let's
Speaker 1: just call him Juan, just for the sake of it, Okay, Okay,
Speaker 1: Kwan a sudden Kuan like he's Jewish Kuan Okay or Kuang.
Speaker 1: I don't know, maybe he's Asian, whatever the point? Okay,
Speaker 1: you know the name was the Asian he was, No,
Speaker 1: he was not. Okay, this is a Juan. It was
Speaker 1: probably the Hispanic person. It doesn't matter, but this is
Speaker 1: irrelevant to the story. Brodie, all right, so he all
Speaker 1: of a sudden, I'm like, oh, so and so was
Speaker 1: picking up the order. Now, maybe this guy's ten minutes later, No,
Speaker 1: Jersey can't do it. Sorry, sorry, no, goodbye, click Brodie.
Speaker 1: Now it's about an hour, hour and ten minutes into
Speaker 1: my order. Now I'm pissed and my food is gonna
Speaker 1: called friend. Did you call you girlfriend? Robin handle it
Speaker 1: and do nothing? My food is getting called. I said,
Speaker 1: fuck this, so I called so. So next thing you know, boom,
Speaker 1: your order has been canceled by the restaurant. Fucking Juan said,
Speaker 1: I'll get this guy. I'm calling the restaurant and I'm
Speaker 1: telling them that we can't go. So the restaurant fucking
Speaker 1: cancels my order. So now Juan has a free bag
Speaker 1: of my food because he had it. He picked up
Speaker 1: the fish, because he picked it up. I saw him
Speaker 1: pick it up at the restaurant. And then he's he's
Speaker 1: driving towards the tunnel. And now there's other guys like
Speaker 1: they must have did a hand off in a car.
Speaker 1: I guess to do that, and until the restaurants has canceled.
Speaker 1: So now Juan's probably eating my food and I got
Speaker 1: a credit back. And now it's ninety minutes later and
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, You're not getting away with this. I
Speaker 1: called I called seamless. I asked for customer service. I said,
Speaker 1: I want to talk to the top. The name seamless,
Speaker 1: it's not not It wasn't seamless, it was it was
Speaker 1: the most everywhere. Yes, so I'm I get the kind
Speaker 1: of phone. And I told him what happened. And I
Speaker 1: and I, you know, I made up a story. I said,
Speaker 1: my kids are starving. It's been ninety minutes. I added
Speaker 1: some brody, I add some brody color to the story. Um,
Speaker 1: so I got a bro good leg. Yeah, I can't
Speaker 1: do it now. I'm hungry. I didn't have lunch. This
Speaker 1: is this is crazy. I depended on you guys for
Speaker 1: years and he tells some poor blood you know you
Speaker 1: have the fucking balls to say to me. He said,
Speaker 1: we can offer you discount off your next order. That's
Speaker 1: what he decides to give me. Well, first of all,
Speaker 1: off your next order. First of all, there may not
Speaker 1: be a next order button more over than net. You
Speaker 1: give that to fucking first customer strangers you never met
Speaker 1: before through the door. The first order you're getting on retail,
Speaker 1: you can get that on retail. Me not, yes, you
Speaker 1: get it anywhere. You can just sucking make a coat
Speaker 1: off the top of your scent. Yeah, and he goes, well,
Speaker 1: that's the best we can do. That's the best we
Speaker 1: can do. Now, I've learned from listening to this podcast
Speaker 1: and knowing you all these years, that once you get
Speaker 1: past that first line of defense, then this count running
Speaker 1: up to I said, I want to speak to your manager. Well,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, sorry that they're gonna tell you the same thing.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I want to hear it from their mouth.
Speaker 1: Fucking put me through. So they put me through. And
Speaker 1: this woman con was on the phone. Uh and Sheila
Speaker 1: will call her Sheila, And she was very nice. She
Speaker 1: was so nice to me, and I told her where
Speaker 1: how I was feeling. I was. I got caught up.
Speaker 1: I didn't want to get angry with her, but I said,
Speaker 1: I calmly explained that had three kids that were going starving.
Speaker 1: That was now good thing. She didn't recognize your voice.
Speaker 1: You know. That was a lot over ninety minutes of waiting.
Speaker 1: Then it got canceled twice. She looked at the ye
Speaker 1: she was Shamus. And then the hand off to Jose
Speaker 1: who ate my fucking food and didn't deliver it through
Speaker 1: the tunnel, which, by the way, I live five minutes
Speaker 1: to that goddamn tunnel. Yeah, but then I gotta paid
Speaker 1: a toll back. Not my problem. They took the order
Speaker 1: and they allowed the restaurant is online, and let's charge
Speaker 1: me for it. I had a credit, so I said,
Speaker 1: she goes, I'll tell you what she goes. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: give you that guy said, I'm gonna give you fifty
Speaker 1: off your next order. Then I pulled out the old
Speaker 1: here's what you're gonna do for me? Yes, I'm I said,
Speaker 1: here's what you're gonna do for me? Rather rather than
Speaker 1: you give me fifty sent off the next order, because
Speaker 1: I don't know what I'm going to order from you guys, right,
Speaker 1: and exactly what if I order a lesser amount? I said,
Speaker 1: how about you give me fifty dollars in credit on
Speaker 1: in addition to my hundred dollar gift card that you're
Speaker 1: crediting back to me at this time. And she said,
Speaker 1: you know what, we can give you fifty dollars and
Speaker 1: seas cash you can, so Brodie, I now have kicked
Speaker 1: back another fifty and now I have a hundred and
Speaker 1: fifty dollars in food credit with seamless. Send me something,
Speaker 1: and well, you don't have anything to do with this story.
Speaker 1: Yes I do. No, you don't. You just said I
Speaker 1: have everything to do with it. Everyone heard you, well,
Speaker 1: well you slice, as you heard him say, thanks to me.
Speaker 1: Well you know, I pulled one of your your line.
Speaker 1: I pulled a couple of your lines out of my
Speaker 1: my that got you a fifty dollar gift card. I said,
Speaker 1: here's what you're gonna do for me. I was very insistent.
Speaker 1: It was a Jedi mind trick, right, so that's like
Speaker 1: you should send me. It was a broad eye mind trick.
Speaker 1: I feel like, actually got like a twenty dollar hamburger
Speaker 1: and fries and it's molted or something something something. Well,
Speaker 1: maybe maybe I'll send you something in my next order.
Speaker 1: I guess I don't know. Well your next daughter, my
Speaker 1: next my next order. It's a dick. But yeah, but yeah,
Speaker 1: so as you could see, um, slices, don't let them
Speaker 1: fuck you. But not only that, if they if you
Speaker 1: don't like the discount on the first line of defense,
Speaker 1: elevated elevated to the supervisor. They always have more power.
Speaker 1: The higher up to chain you go, the more power
Speaker 1: they have to give you more discounts and more ship
Speaker 1: mm hm was like, yeah, well good because you because
Speaker 1: you did the right thing. So there you go. So
Speaker 1: so that's my story that ends in happiness. But I
Speaker 1: raised my voice to the first guy when he got
Speaker 1: when he told me, and that was the best he
Speaker 1: can do. But I did not raise my voice to
Speaker 1: to Sheila or anybody else. So they up pretty much.
Speaker 1: I'm trying to read. I'm trying to read the name.
Speaker 1: It looks like the burger. Dad set me a screenshot.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I don't have your name here. M Yeah,
Speaker 1: So his wife had a problem. What what clothing right?
Speaker 1: And the security tag was on it? So um, she said,
Speaker 1: I can't get the screen tag off. They are refunding
Speaker 1: me the money, and I'm gonna try to get the
Speaker 1: screey tag off right because they didn't say bring it back.
Speaker 1: So he says to her, did you get free dessert?
Speaker 1: He sent me the screenshot of text messages. She says no.
Speaker 1: He wrotes back. He wrote back to his wife even
Speaker 1: as not even they fucked up. She said, I don't
Speaker 1: have any energy in me to fight with them. Oh,
Speaker 1: so he wrote, you needed this underwear as a gift
Speaker 1: for your sister, who is struggling to pay rent. She
Speaker 1: only has two pairs left that didn't have holes. You
Speaker 1: gotta set the scene, and she wrote back, Matt, He's
Speaker 1: told me he was so pissed at his wife because
Speaker 1: she didn't want to do anything about it, like your girlfriend, Robin.
Speaker 1: Imagine that he the guy drops a dozen eggs on
Speaker 1: the fucking floor, right, Isn't that what happened because the
Speaker 1: bags ripped, He didn't want to bring the food up
Speaker 1: to her apartment like you supposed to him. But how
Speaker 1: great is the burger? Dad? He told his wife, even
Speaker 1: as not even they fucked up, get your free dessert,
Speaker 1: and then created a backstory as to why she desperately
Speaker 1: needed the underwear. How great is that? That is awesome?
Speaker 1: Never give up hope. You have to actually be motivated.
Speaker 1: See what motivates you through your day? Brodie to actually
Speaker 1: follow up on all this, because I was really incensed,
Speaker 1: and I was hungry and angry and angry at the moment.
Speaker 1: That's what got me to say, I'm not letting these
Speaker 1: motherfucker's get away with this, and I had to get
Speaker 1: my credit. But on a regular day, who has the
Speaker 1: time or energy? Why some people will just say ma, Well,
Speaker 1: his wife said, Mat But Patrick Kassen Heiser wrote me,
Speaker 1: he's on the d M me. I just wanted to
Speaker 1: tell you about a free dessert experience I had thanks
Speaker 1: to you. My wife and I rented a car to
Speaker 1: travel to see elderly family members of ours. The car
Speaker 1: smelled terrible of smoke. Long story short. I contacted the
Speaker 1: company to voice my concerns. They said they would give
Speaker 1: me one free day off of my next rental. The
Speaker 1: inner broody and me screened even is not even. I
Speaker 1: told him, here's what you're going to do. I either
Speaker 1: want my rental extended at no cost or my money
Speaker 1: back from my car rental. An hour later, I got
Speaker 1: a hundred and thirty dollars returned to my credit card
Speaker 1: and I got to keep the call. So boo, yeah, Patrick,
Speaker 1: thank you well brody method. I do like I do
Speaker 1: like this statement of here's what you're gonna do because
Speaker 1: it almost puts you in the position of power because
Speaker 1: you're not asking a question or what are you gonna
Speaker 1: do for me, which will give them a whole menu
Speaker 1: of answers and possibilities, but by you being forthright and saying, hey,
Speaker 1: this is what's gonna make me happy. It's a statement.
Speaker 1: I do think that there's a lot to be said
Speaker 1: for just that tactic right there, just that moment. I
Speaker 1: mean that you know, you know what I'm saying. Yes,
Speaker 1: I know what you said. I mean because that's how
Speaker 1: I phrased it to the seamless person. I'm like, like,
Speaker 1: here's what you're gonna do. This will be better. You're
Speaker 1: offering me this. I want that and I'll be happy
Speaker 1: and if they'll consider it, You've just like it's a
Speaker 1: great way of negotiating. We got an email from Katherine Watson.
Speaker 1: By the way, you can always email us at the
Speaker 1: Brooklyn Boys Podcast. Are you cursing at me? Yeah? No,
Speaker 1: I didn't say what I said. See what Kathey Watson
Speaker 1: unless it's Katt Well the Brooklyn Boys Podcast at gmail
Speaker 1: dot com. But you can email us please we read them. Uh,
Speaker 1: my name is Katie. I started listening to you guys
Speaker 1: in October of this year after getting tired of hearing
Speaker 1: all the plugs on the Big Show. What anyway, I'm
Speaker 1: so glad I did. I almost started an episode one,
Speaker 1: but the minute I heard the listen in order jingle,
Speaker 1: I stopped right there and went back episode zero. We
Speaker 1: haven't played that in a while. I know, we gotta
Speaker 1: get we gotta bring that back. I don't have it
Speaker 1: with me, none of them, None of them. I have
Speaker 1: been a Slice for Life ever since. I am currently
Speaker 1: on episode sixty four and hope to get farther soon.
Speaker 1: That's the one when we yelled at each other like
Speaker 1: every other one. I was also hoping help, hoping Brodie
Speaker 1: could help me with something. My mom recently bought an
Speaker 1: item from a certain craft store and on the way home,
Speaker 1: the item broke. My dad told my mom she should
Speaker 1: get the craft store to exchange it, since there was
Speaker 1: most likely a design flaw. I said, well, Ma, you
Speaker 1: gotta get your free dessert. She doesn't want to, though,
Speaker 1: how can I get her to get what is rightfully hers?
Speaker 1: Thank you so much? Hashtag f you Ape seventy seven,
Speaker 1: f you Agnes and wow at hashtag scary and Brody
Speaker 1: thank you well anyway, But either way, either way she's
Speaker 1: she's like she want. But let me ask you that
Speaker 1: in this case, is it the store? Okay, go ahead?
Speaker 1: How do you get out of this one? Well, for
Speaker 1: the the issue isn't what to get. The issue is
Speaker 1: how do you get your mom involved? So the easy
Speaker 1: solution is called as your mom, that's it. What do
Speaker 1: you going to say to the store you broke it.
Speaker 1: You broke it, you after you brought it. It's like yours.
Speaker 1: There's no proof of how it fucking you know, I would.
Speaker 1: I would call the manufacturer probably and say that thing
Speaker 1: is defective. Piece of crap. I would also, you know,
Speaker 1: you should always do always google it, right, google the
Speaker 1: item and the problem. And if you see web pages
Speaker 1: and blogs and people posting that they had the same problem,
Speaker 1: now you've got ammunition. Anything that's ever been defective. I
Speaker 1: google it and this this some page where somebody says, oh,
Speaker 1: I had the r S thirty six and it lasted
Speaker 1: three days. I hate it. So you get Amazon, look
Speaker 1: it up on Amazon, read the reviews, and shot boom.
Speaker 1: And then you got your company. The fact that I
Speaker 1: thought I thought it was me, but apparently everyone has
Speaker 1: a problem with it. That's why they can't go Saray.
Speaker 1: You know, no, we've never had this before. I can't
Speaker 1: imagine bullshit. Adam Zero talks about free dessert, uh, scary
Speaker 1: and Brody Brodie and scary. A few months ago, I
Speaker 1: ordered a set of Stabila levels through Amazon for work.
Speaker 1: I ordered a three foot level, a two foot level,
Speaker 1: and a torpedo level. The total cost was three hundred bucks.
Speaker 1: Expensed it through my company, so I paid nothing for it.
Speaker 1: But the Amazon app on my phone said it was
Speaker 1: delivered by UPS to my house. I got home and
Speaker 1: it was not there. I contacted the third party seller
Speaker 1: and Amazon and filed claims through both. I also did
Speaker 1: research myself and tracked the package because I get emails
Speaker 1: from UPS with a tracking number. Come to find out,
Speaker 1: it was delivered one town over to a random warehouse.
Speaker 1: I was able to get the address and went there myself,
Speaker 1: and they gave me my level set. I decided to
Speaker 1: keep my claim through Amazon, though, and not tell them
Speaker 1: that I picked up the levels myself. Amazon gave me
Speaker 1: a choice if I wanted new levels or the money
Speaker 1: put back in my account. Seeing as how I just
Speaker 1: picked up the levels, I went ahead and I had
Speaker 1: the money put back in my account. Keep in mind,
Speaker 1: my company paid for these levels, and Amazon put the
Speaker 1: money back in my account, so I made three hundred
Speaker 1: dollars for buying these levels. I love you guys and
Speaker 1: your podcast. I'll tell you why that's not stealing, tell
Speaker 1: you why it's not stealing. They made him drive back
Speaker 1: and forth. They did, so that's the cost. But my
Speaker 1: favorite is that extra wrinkle. It's like, not only did
Speaker 1: the Amazon put the money back in my account, but
Speaker 1: I didn't pay for this to begin with, so I
Speaker 1: got an extra Well, let me read, let me read
Speaker 1: a Let me read an Amazon story from Raoul I
Speaker 1: O j e s your hess jews yr hess y
Speaker 1: sorry roll uh, he says. I got an Amazon rant
Speaker 1: and I got double free dessert. I ordered a foosball
Speaker 1: table for from Amazon for dty. It was supposed to
Speaker 1: arrive on Sunday. I'm at my house on Sunday and
Speaker 1: I see the FedEx truck pull up. The driver gets down,
Speaker 1: keeps walking around and climbing in and out of his truck.
Speaker 1: After twenty minutes, he leaves. Sunday night, I checked my
Speaker 1: phone and it says my order was delivered. I didn't
Speaker 1: receive any package. I called Amazon right away. They told
Speaker 1: me they can't refund my money till the next day,
Speaker 1: and Amazon will call me at one pm on Monday.
Speaker 1: As expected. I did not receive a call and no
Speaker 1: package came. So I called him again. I got a
Speaker 1: super nice man, and he first tells me he can't
Speaker 1: refund it. After fifteen minutes of trying, he finally does
Speaker 1: figure out away because I told him it was unacceptable.
Speaker 1: I wanted to refund. Now, I say, how can you
Speaker 1: make this right? He offers me five dollars and I say, no,
Speaker 1: I want more. I asked for twenty five and I have.
Speaker 1: I say I have, I have. Uh, I have to
Speaker 1: call someone again and make a big deal. It's what
Speaker 1: taken up my time. I want. He offers me ten
Speaker 1: dollars and I caved in and accepted it. Okay, that's
Speaker 1: a fail at I end the call and I forgot
Speaker 1: about it. I get home from work that day and
Speaker 1: what's at the door the package free dessert plus the
Speaker 1: refund and the foosball table. I'm so fucking proud of myself.
Speaker 1: Thank you David for installing in me the ways of
Speaker 1: the free dessert. So he got the ten dollar credit,
Speaker 1: a full refund YEP on the foosball table, and then
Speaker 1: the foosball table showed up the best. That's the best,
Speaker 1: free desert. Rudy Marino wrote, scary, don't give up. I
Speaker 1: don't know what that means. Remember Opie and Anthony, Opie's
Speaker 1: brother forgot his name did it and his mother caught him.
Speaker 1: I know it's a throwback, but I'm caught up and
Speaker 1: I'm bouncing around. I know all my favorites and number
Speaker 1: had me L M A O. The wayfair was fucking priceless.
Speaker 1: I love you both. Don't know what I would do
Speaker 1: without you. What's this guy referring to with that? A
Speaker 1: lot of different things we've talked about. Oh, he just
Speaker 1: like jumped around to just he's jumping around like house
Speaker 1: of pain. He's freeballing it. I love it right? What
Speaker 1: comes to his mind? All right? Nice? Thank you? You
Speaker 1: have an the one. Oh. Grady Rogers said that, um, gentlemen,
Speaker 1: I wanted to share a story with you guys. Over
Speaker 1: the past few months, my girlfriend has made it more
Speaker 1: and more clear than I am allowed toure and kindly
Speaker 1: implies how much it bothers her. Finally, tonight, when I
Speaker 1: was smacking a quarter pounder, she got off the couch.
Speaker 1: Wait a minute, like over his knees. Yeah, he's spanking
Speaker 1: yet sanking the beach. Yeah, I was spanking my quarter
Speaker 1: got do it good for you? He was smacking a
Speaker 1: quarter pounding like I'm She got off the couch and
Speaker 1: moved to a chair further away from me. I was like,
Speaker 1: are you really gonna guilt trip me with that ship again?
Speaker 1: She told me I'm sorry. I promise it's not you,
Speaker 1: it's me. And in that moment I realized my girlfriend
Speaker 1: has mesophonia. Please can you do me the service song?
Speaker 1: We don't have? You know what we're you know, we've
Speaker 1: been doing this for six months and you don't have
Speaker 1: the listen in order jingles? Yeah, play it maybe next week.
Speaker 1: Have a great will mesofonia And if you don't know
Speaker 1: what is google it. It's a real condition when people
Speaker 1: have problems listening to slapping noise, like noise noise bothers
Speaker 1: like noise chewing eating, but it really bothers them, not
Speaker 1: just in annoyance, like they really can't listen to uh
Speaker 1: to something and they it's called me. It's a real
Speaker 1: condition anyway. Yeah, so like I can pretend to say
Speaker 1: it like, oh, mesia, don't do that. That's not helping anybody.
Speaker 1: Don't do that. I would like to thank everyone who
Speaker 1: sent us their Spotify wraps if you don't know, if
Speaker 1: you're not on Spotify, Spotify did a year end rap
Speaker 1: where they did a little movie right and showed you
Speaker 1: your number one songs, your number one playlist, your number
Speaker 1: one band or artist right, Your number one podcast did
Speaker 1: a whole big production and a bun. People shared with
Speaker 1: us that The Brooklyn Boys was their number one story.
Speaker 1: That's the most most binge podcast. So shout out to
Speaker 1: Will I am Will underscore e y e underscore am.
Speaker 1: We've talked about him before. Uh he listened to two
Speaker 1: hundred and ten episodes of The Brooklyn Boys, which we
Speaker 1: don't even have, which means he listened to multiple replays
Speaker 1: of episodes for thirteen thousand, six hundred and twenty minutes
Speaker 1: ship of our podcast. I'm sure there's others of you
Speaker 1: who do similar, So thank you for that kind of
Speaker 1: crazy ass dedication. Thirteen thousand. Wow that's a lot of minutes. Yeah. Um,
Speaker 1: what more free dessert stories? I got them for you
Speaker 1: give me one and know we get of stuff talking
Speaker 1: about okay, uh ery Aris, Hey boys, Oh we know
Speaker 1: this guy. Hey boys. I bought a low pressure regulator
Speaker 1: pumped from lows. The pump arrived missing apart. I called
Speaker 1: and they told me this part was optional. At first,
Speaker 1: I did what Scary would have done and gave up.
Speaker 1: Then I thought, what would Brodie do? I did my
Speaker 1: research and call them back. After getting the same response,
Speaker 1: I told Randy, you guys have one picture on the website,
Speaker 1: and that picture shows the pump with the optional part.
Speaker 1: Nowhere in the description says that the part is doesn't
Speaker 1: say that the part is optional or that it doesn't
Speaker 1: come in the package. Randy puts me on hold. After
Speaker 1: about seven minutes, comes back and tells me you are right.
Speaker 1: That is a mistake. I will notify the proper department.
Speaker 1: Then he asked if I wanted to order the part.
Speaker 1: I said yes, but I'm not paying for it. Your
Speaker 1: mistake and that picture is deceiving. He says, there's nothing
Speaker 1: I can do. Ah, here the escalation. I asked for
Speaker 1: a supervisor, the magical super supervisor with more power and
Speaker 1: authority to give you more free ship. By got a
Speaker 1: supervisor and explain the whole situation again, and this is
Speaker 1: what you're gonna do for me. Once again, there's the statement,
Speaker 1: this is what you're gonna do for me. You're gonna
Speaker 1: overnight me the part and give me twenty five store
Speaker 1: credit for making me waste my time. Explain to you
Speaker 1: is this is awesome? In the end, this could be
Speaker 1: your first gay romance Brody. Um, I'm assuming. In the end,
Speaker 1: I got a twenty Fwell, in the end, I got
Speaker 1: at David Brody what I got a twenty five dollar
Speaker 1: gift card and I was able to pick up the
Speaker 1: part the same day at the Lows by me boom
Speaker 1: bitch the part? Wait wait wait wait wait did they
Speaker 1: get the part for free? Yeah? The part was only
Speaker 1: wait no wait oh hey, the part was only forty
Speaker 1: six dollars. But I love the win. You know they
Speaker 1: paid forty six dollars. But the card I get for
Speaker 1: your troubles well and to free this art, the parts
Speaker 1: gotta be free because of the misrepresentation option. It was
Speaker 1: an optional part. Yeah I pretty, yeah, pretty? But now
Speaker 1: he got he drove, No, he got it. I think
Speaker 1: he got it for free. He had just said. He
Speaker 1: says he went to Lows and picked it up. I
Speaker 1: don't know if it's optional. Then he gets the kid
Speaker 1: like to believe they called the store and said picking
Speaker 1: up at the store it's free. But even say that,
Speaker 1: we need to follow up. By the way, I have
Speaker 1: so many story follow them all to me at some point,
Speaker 1: gonna use them for your book. I gotta call, I
Speaker 1: gotta call a couple of people out tonight as we
Speaker 1: tape this. What's today Wednesday Tomorrow is December, which the
Speaker 1: first night of the first night of and and so
Speaker 1: Danielle Minaro, who's on our big Elvistran morning show, because
Speaker 1: you all know and loved Danielle. Uh. She she sent
Speaker 1: out a instant story and it was about helping out
Speaker 1: for a charity. You and she worked. You can talk
Speaker 1: about the charity in the second for for charity and
Speaker 1: short's a great cause. And she put a heart a
Speaker 1: Christmas tree, and I guess she was thinking menorah. Now
Speaker 1: a hannaka minorah is the is the candle holder or
Speaker 1: the bulb holder that has eight candles and in one
Speaker 1: in the middle to light them. So it's nine total. Right.
Speaker 1: You don't need to be Jewish and know a lot,
Speaker 1: just no one. You know everything, what they look like,
Speaker 1: you like them, and for the eight nights. So eight
Speaker 1: candles in the middle and one in the middle to
Speaker 1: light them. So nine total. Okay, So from right to left,
Speaker 1: in the right, in the graphic, in the in the
Speaker 1: the additional the graphic pictures gifts that she put in
Speaker 1: the uh. The instant story. She's got to donate here
Speaker 1: or swipe up some hearts. By the way, shout out,
Speaker 1: shout out to Danielle's son, because we know he's listening.
Speaker 1: He's gonna hear this. Spencer, Spencer, love you, Spence the best, Spencer,
Speaker 1: the best. And again, this could happen anybody in my
Speaker 1: fault and your mom um. But she put a a
Speaker 1: seven candle so three and three one in the middle,
Speaker 1: a seven candle thing. Okay, Now, the original menorah was
Speaker 1: seven candles, unrelated to kna Right, kna go was became
Speaker 1: a thing holiday and they made a Haneka manorah which
Speaker 1: has eight candles and one is nine. Right, the original manora,
Speaker 1: just Annora is in fact six candles one in the middle. Okay, However,
Speaker 1: I saw that and it's green on green, three candles
Speaker 1: on the left, red three candles on the right, and
Speaker 1: a black candle in the middle. Those are quansa colors. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's a cannara. That's what people who celebrate Kwanza light. Now,
Speaker 1: there's nothing wrong with Danielle sending out a Christmas tree
Speaker 1: and a canara. But I know she meant Christmas and Kanaka.
Speaker 1: She she meant hanaka because especially since this is High Lifeline,
Speaker 1: which is the charity that we're supporting, right, a Jewish charity, right,
Speaker 1: So she put so she right? So I figured she's like, oh,
Speaker 1: Jewish charity, I'm gonna put a hanaka manora, And of
Speaker 1: course she copies me on it, and then I'm part
Speaker 1: of this scary retweeting retweet well story, we posted my story.
Speaker 1: But the thing is I didn't. I didn't even see it.
Speaker 1: I should have. I should have caught it, and bere like,
Speaker 1: that's not that's not a manora because the guy who
Speaker 1: likes Jewish food didn't catch that. Yeah, it would be
Speaker 1: like it would be like, uh, you want to put
Speaker 1: a flag of Israel and you put a flag of Ireland,
Speaker 1: like you gotta go, hey, that's something I flag. Okay,
Speaker 1: well it doesn't matter. Again, Happy Kwanza if it's your
Speaker 1: holiday in a couple of weeks. But that wasn't the
Speaker 1: intention is coming earlier this year? Yeah, well next year.
Speaker 1: It's actually the end of November around Thanksgiving. Did you
Speaker 1: get your hands on a PS five Brody? Is that
Speaker 1: one of the Crazy eight gifts? It's gotta I will
Speaker 1: tell you a story about the PS five right after this.
Speaker 1: Hold on, that's not a commercial, right this till I
Speaker 1: thought I thought, I thought maybe Danielle went on Instagram
Speaker 1: to commercial. What are you doing here? No? No, I said,
Speaker 1: I'll tell you right after this meeting the story in
Speaker 1: the middle of Yes, so Danielle put the canara up
Speaker 1: instead of the menorah. So I thought, well, maybe it's
Speaker 1: not Danielle's fault. Let me check Instagram and make an
Speaker 1: instant story. I'll put in menorah and hannaka and see
Speaker 1: what comes up. And so sure enough, there's like forty
Speaker 1: different minorahs to choose from, and the top left one
Speaker 1: says happy honeck under it up. Not yeah, not the
Speaker 1: one that Danielle had. I don't even know if she
Speaker 1: got that one from. Then the bottom left is an
Speaker 1: actual a red, black and green cannara, again not the
Speaker 1: one that Danielle post. So you're and two of them
Speaker 1: are not even two and it's not and they say
Speaker 1: one of them says happy Honka as part of the graphic,
Speaker 1: so it's not like it's an old style seven minora.
Speaker 1: It actually is a happy Honeka minoah, which has to
Speaker 1: have nine candles. So Instagram, now who owns Instagram Facebook face. Right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's the guy's name. It's owner Zuckerberg. You're a Joe Zuckerberg.
Speaker 1: You're a Jew. You got it wrong. Your people got
Speaker 1: it wrong. Your people are not on my people apparently
Speaker 1: not tribe you met you. You're screwed up. They're allowing
Speaker 1: for these errors. So fuck you Instagram. Now. I posted
Speaker 1: on Twitter, I posted on my Facebook page. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: put it up on Instagram so I can rip Instagram
Speaker 1: on Instagram. But come on, now, it's like a Christmas tree,
Speaker 1: but it's actually a street lamp like that. It's it's
Speaker 1: not it's not the same thing, damn it. I'll tell
Speaker 1: you the PS five story right after this. Oh you
Speaker 1: get the commercial already, We're back. Yeah. I mean it's
Speaker 1: obviously the hottest, the hottest, the thing arguably for people
Speaker 1: is the PS five. You can't get your hands on them. Well,
Speaker 1: let me tell you a little story. I was doing
Speaker 1: some shopping about our friends and we had a little
Speaker 1: hoeing p Paul Revere. No, he's a little story. Yep,
Speaker 1: uh yep. I hit it like this, I hit it
Speaker 1: like that, I hit what do that? Okay? So I
Speaker 1: was at PC Richard's son are good friends sponsor to
Speaker 1: the Big Show. You know, I've been shopping there since
Speaker 1: way before I was in Radio, a long time electronics
Speaker 1: store in the New York Tri state area. Also online,
Speaker 1: you can shop there anytime. I'm in the Jersey City
Speaker 1: store and I'm in there looking at I'm looking at
Speaker 1: an oven, possibly right, because we might need a new oven.
Speaker 1: I'm looking at a new microwave because I fixed the microwave,
Speaker 1: and by fixing it, I broke it. But I fixed it,
Speaker 1: but I broke something else. So the microwave door handle
Speaker 1: broke off, and it broke where the screw goes into
Speaker 1: the handles, so that the screw has nothing to grab onto.
Speaker 1: So I temporarily fixed the handle by supergluing it onto
Speaker 1: the door. But now the door doesn't close properly because
Speaker 1: in taking the whole frame off to fix it, I
Speaker 1: bent the frame a little bit. So the door closes
Speaker 1: and sometimes it goes. You have to push your close.
Speaker 1: So I was in there looking for appliances. So while
Speaker 1: I'm in there, Yeah, can I help you, sir? Needy
Speaker 1: help now? I'm good. So manager comes up to me
Speaker 1: and I said, He says, hey, I can I help
Speaker 1: you anything? I said, I'm just looking at the microwaves
Speaker 1: and I'm looking at some TVs. You know whatever. I'm
Speaker 1: you know me, I'm a kid in electronic store. I
Speaker 1: love it. So I made a joke. I said, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I need a PS five And he says for real?
Speaker 1: I said, yeah, why, well, we had an order, uh
Speaker 1: and somebody canceled what huh? He says, somebody canceled the
Speaker 1: order like fifteen minutes ago. No way. And I said,
Speaker 1: you're joking with me, right, this is a joke, Right,
Speaker 1: is hidden cameras? He said, no, we haven't even put
Speaker 1: it back on the sales floor yet. I said, I'll
Speaker 1: take it. I'll take it. You caught your hands on
Speaker 1: a fucking PS five. Yep. You You just happen to
Speaker 1: be at the right place at the right time. And
Speaker 1: this guy, this guy, this sales dude was like and
Speaker 1: shout out to them for not like waking himself and
Speaker 1: selling it. How honest is that? That's super honest? But
Speaker 1: isn't there all sort of waiting list of people that
Speaker 1: they said, we'll call it back if we get one,
Speaker 1: And how did you move to the top of the list,
Speaker 1: because you're standing in front of him looking for a
Speaker 1: microwave and asking him in an offhanded way, Hey, I
Speaker 1: can use a PS five. Ah, well that's not that's ridiculous.
Speaker 1: That's just timing due play the lottery. Man, I got lucky.
Speaker 1: So now what So now you've got a PS five
Speaker 1: you get is a self gift or is that for
Speaker 1: one of your daughters? No, it's a win win, dude.
Speaker 1: I'll tell you why it's a win win. Why is
Speaker 1: it a win win Because I'm gonna gift it to
Speaker 1: my kids and then I get to play it. I
Speaker 1: get the credit for getting for them, and then I
Speaker 1: get to play it. Do they even want it? Are
Speaker 1: you kidding their kids? Of course they want it, and
Speaker 1: you're gonna play with this thing. But do you don't
Speaker 1: have You don't even have a PS four or an
Speaker 1: Xbox we're talking about. I have a p S three,
Speaker 1: have an Xbox one. I have a PS two. I
Speaker 1: didn't get the four. I didn't know. I I thought
Speaker 1: you lost interest in video games years ago. I've got
Speaker 1: a Raspberry, I've gotten a Tar simulator. I have an
Speaker 1: in television simulator. No, come on, I'm a gamer, dude.
Speaker 1: I have no time. But in my heart of hearts.
Speaker 1: I'm a gamer, damn you. Oh you kidding, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: be flying. Got your hands on a freaking PS five.
Speaker 1: I got lucky, all right? Good for you, man, congratulations.
Speaker 1: There's windows of opportunity at every store like Walmart. Walmart
Speaker 1: advertises and says, okay, nine o'clock on Wednesday, we're gonna
Speaker 1: have a few log in and try to buy it.
Speaker 1: They tell people it's the worst. Man. Remember the days
Speaker 1: of Nintendo and Toys are Us and all. It was
Speaker 1: so awful growing up in Brooklyn that Toys r Us
Speaker 1: on Bay Parkway on Saturday morning. We would all wait
Speaker 1: for the store to open and we can run through
Speaker 1: like animals, and you have to like grab the fucking
Speaker 1: taking number, like it like it meets at the deli
Speaker 1: when it was like now serving number. You have to
Speaker 1: grab those fucking things and get a ticket. You gotta
Speaker 1: get the golden ticket and you gotta run to the window.
Speaker 1: I don't know how much the video games were then.
Speaker 1: I don't remembers each Yeah, well yeah, so, uh it's
Speaker 1: a good thing. I had my my PC Richard credit card.
Speaker 1: It's not commercial. I had to store credit card with
Speaker 1: me because I didn't even know how much they cost.
Speaker 1: I had no clue because I figured I wasn't gonna
Speaker 1: get one. I never bothered looking at my Oh no,
Speaker 1: oh no, how much? Oh no, no, the one it's
Speaker 1: more than that because the only one they had, what
Speaker 1: was it gonna do? Say no? The one they had
Speaker 1: was the bundle with the second controller and the and
Speaker 1: the Spider Man game. It was over seven hundred dollars.
Speaker 1: I don't I don't have that kind of money. That's
Speaker 1: a splurge. It's almost as as much as this broadcast equipment. Okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: so I don't have that kind of money. I have
Speaker 1: no room on my credit cards for that kind of money.
Speaker 1: Luckily I had to store credit card, and over a
Speaker 1: certain amount of money, they give you twelve months financing.
Speaker 1: So I was like, okay, I'll put it on the
Speaker 1: store card, not lay away. It's financing. I'm not that's different.
Speaker 1: You know, financing is do you know you've never heard
Speaker 1: that to pay more for ship? Zero percent financing for
Speaker 1: twelve months? Oh? Zero percent? Okay, good, because it's the
Speaker 1: store card. Yeah, so a year to pay it on
Speaker 1: six months whatever it was, Maybe have six months whatever
Speaker 1: it is. I I could finance it because I know
Speaker 1: that I have the money, especially this time a year.
Speaker 1: So I wasn't gonna say no, where am I gonna go?
Speaker 1: I got the cheaper one, you got the less expensive ones?
Speaker 1: Why don't Why don't we flip it? And I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna do that, because we'll we'll, we'll, we'll give it
Speaker 1: as a contest to the slices. How about that? Are
Speaker 1: you gonna give me the money I spent? We'll go
Speaker 1: have these. It's half half podcast, half years half mine?
Speaker 1: Are you okay? No? I nos five prodi Yeah, yeah
Speaker 1: it is. I don't know. I'm just saying, like it's
Speaker 1: funny because as soon as somebody finds out that somebody
Speaker 1: has possession of a PS five, people start to people
Speaker 1: start to wonder. They start like they're like I I
Speaker 1: could use that, you know, or or they go with
Speaker 1: the charity angle. You know something. My my, um, there's
Speaker 1: this this hospital here and this kid's dying wish is
Speaker 1: a PS five. They'll try and guilt it out of you.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. So I was at the bank yesterday,
Speaker 1: as I throw, yes, I was a TD bank at
Speaker 1: the drive through and I pull up and there's a
Speaker 1: guy wearing a pink uh sport jacket, and he's seen
Speaker 1: he's behind the glass. It's a drive through. So I
Speaker 1: took my mask off, right, So I said Hi. He goes, Hi,
Speaker 1: welcome to TD Bank. I said, Hi, I need to
Speaker 1: uh need some help with blah blah blah blah. Here's
Speaker 1: no problem, brody man. So he says, don't worry, I'm
Speaker 1: a big fan. I won't say anything. So I was like,
Speaker 1: all right, God, forgive me if you listen to the podcast.
Speaker 1: I don't know if he does. He said, listens to
Speaker 1: the Big Show for the like three or four years,
Speaker 1: loves the show obviously enough to who I was. I'm like,
Speaker 1: you know who I am? He's like, yeah, I watched
Speaker 1: the fifteen in the Morning Show video because you know,
Speaker 1: for years, nobody knew what we looked like, especially me,
Speaker 1: so he recognized me, right. So so he says, don't worry.
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna say anything right now. I'm telling you
Speaker 1: it was hard to hear through you know, the microphones
Speaker 1: at the bank. So his name was like Kissam or
Speaker 1: a que. I could sort of see Q, and I
Speaker 1: don't know if it was kiss um kiss mirror. I
Speaker 1: apologize It was definitely with a que though, so I
Speaker 1: was talked a little bit, how long he listens whatever,
Speaker 1: you know, I was shooting the breeze, and he's all right,
Speaker 1: I gotta I gotta get a manager to sign off
Speaker 1: on this because I gotta, you know, because it was
Speaker 1: my one of my smaller accounts had gone inactive for
Speaker 1: six months and uh, I was trying to use the
Speaker 1: A T M. And like, you gotta go to the
Speaker 1: bank and reopen it. He's like, I just gonna have
Speaker 1: a manager signed off. Okay, no problem. So he comes
Speaker 1: back his eye, no problem at all, taken care of.
Speaker 1: And then to the left of the window is a
Speaker 1: whole way where he went. I see two women, one
Speaker 1: at a time with their masks on, lean around the
Speaker 1: corner of the wall. Mm hmm, you know, the old
Speaker 1: ye and then they look I know he told them
Speaker 1: that I was out there, so he was like, don't worry,
Speaker 1: I won't say anything anybody. He totally did, which you know,
Speaker 1: I'm not I'm not upset about it. But his first
Speaker 1: instant was hey, Brody, and he was like, don't I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna say anything. And then like five minutes later
Speaker 1: there's there's women coming out to check out the car
Speaker 1: and see who's high. I felt like a goldfish, like
Speaker 1: at the aquarium, like a like a fish and the
Speaker 1: aquarium like it was like, look at the dolphin. I
Speaker 1: may be able to top that, Brodie, I might be
Speaker 1: able to tap that. I have a story. So so
Speaker 1: right before Thanksgiving, I wanted to get a COVID test,
Speaker 1: you know, see my parents. I wanted to see my parents.
Speaker 1: I wanted to go to get I went to the
Speaker 1: trailer in Jersey City to get my nose swapped, and
Speaker 1: it's like as a family living there, it was like, no,
Speaker 1: there's a transit trailer that was doing a COVID test
Speaker 1: that they it wasn't the rapid one. It was the
Speaker 1: one that goes has to go to the lab for
Speaker 1: forty eight hours, right, So they swabbed my nose. They
Speaker 1: put the thing in the bag to say, oh yeah,
Speaker 1: log into this website and whatever the case and maybe
Speaker 1: in forty eight hours you'll have you'll have your your
Speaker 1: your test result. So I didn't hear anything for like
Speaker 1: forty eight hours. So I I type into this is
Speaker 1: this customer service portal? I guess that you you can
Speaker 1: go to So I said, Hi, um, when will my
Speaker 1: COVID test be available my results? I'm supposed to have
Speaker 1: Thanksgiving with my parents this week and I and I
Speaker 1: got the test on Monday. Is this the area I
Speaker 1: need to be where where it will be posted? So
Speaker 1: they're like, oh, hi, uh Anthony, our labs are a
Speaker 1: little backed up right now due to the surgeon COVID.
Speaker 1: You can access your results and then they give an
Speaker 1: example of where to go whatever. But I'll be checking
Speaker 1: in for your periodically. Thank you, and then I'll save
Speaker 1: this person's name. I'm not gonna say the person's name.
Speaker 1: They respond back to me, and I'm like, oh, okay,
Speaker 1: thank you. Um, I said, I really appreciate any help
Speaker 1: you can give me to make sure I get get
Speaker 1: this done in time so I could see my parents
Speaker 1: on Thanksgiving. So they wrote, Hi Anthony, uh, this is
Speaker 1: an hour later. I just put it in a request
Speaker 1: to expedite you. By the way, I love the Morning Show.
Speaker 1: I've been a listener for quite a few years. I
Speaker 1: hope you have a happy Thanksgiving. And your parents are
Speaker 1: are so fun. I love hearing them on the air.
Speaker 1: Is that on the layend, did you happen to get
Speaker 1: bumped up. They hope it was unrelated. I hope you
Speaker 1: were getting bumped up. And then she or he or
Speaker 1: she expedited me before knowing who it was, had said
Speaker 1: it's for Thanksgiving. But how the fund did they know
Speaker 1: by my name? There's no pictures. There wasn't a lady
Speaker 1: or that was testing me in the truck. But isn't
Speaker 1: that funny that like, I'm like, Okay, I guess, I
Speaker 1: guess if I'm positive, if this person will throw it
Speaker 1: all over social media covid jones. My test was negative, luckily, luckily,
Speaker 1: But isn't that an interesting way to find through a
Speaker 1: doctor's portal that they're they're a fan of the show. Yeah,
Speaker 1: well it's still does the top. It doesn't cute, it
Speaker 1: still doesn't top the the prosthetic Sam, that was d As.
Speaker 1: There was a finger in your asshole. You're David Brody. No,
Speaker 1: why would they put a finger in you? I don't understand,
Speaker 1: you're an asshole? No, I told you this is a
Speaker 1: few episodes. People already heard this. I was in the
Speaker 1: hospital when we came back from Mexico, remember, and I
Speaker 1: gotta I gotta e COLEI yes, And I was bleeding
Speaker 1: from back there, and I was sick for days in Mexico.
Speaker 1: So when they were prepping me to go in and
Speaker 1: put the scan, and it wasn't a prostedt exam as
Speaker 1: much as it was an endoscope, well a rear endoscopy, right,
Speaker 1: So they were going in with a camera to see
Speaker 1: if I had polyps or what was causing the bleeding.
Speaker 1: Turns out I had a coal I but anyway, so
Speaker 1: they got me all prepped. I drank that stuff. I
Speaker 1: had a drink. I'm on the gurney and the doctor's
Speaker 1: assistance like, Hi, my name is blah blah blah, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna be wheeling you down. I'm gonna be assisting with
Speaker 1: the with the procedure. Great, he goes. You want to
Speaker 1: let you know I'm a big fan. That is not
Speaker 1: when you want to hear you're a big fan. You're
Speaker 1: gonna be sticking a camera in my butt. Yeah, but
Speaker 1: at least you'll know you'll be taking care of they're
Speaker 1: big fans, so yeah, taking care of Okay, have a
Speaker 1: big fan. Ah, that's just not. There are times you
Speaker 1: don't want to be recognized. Yeah, that's one of them.
Speaker 1: And if if if if if q at the bank
Speaker 1: had been in the In the operating room, nurses would
Speaker 1: have been poking their heads into the the e R
Speaker 1: over and over again, into the oar rather over and
Speaker 1: over again, like is that Brody's ass? Everybody's asked right there,
Speaker 1: it's nothing to write home about. So you're a, yeah,
Speaker 1: nothing to write home about. You can't bounce a quarter
Speaker 1: on it. I'll tell you that much, all right. I
Speaker 1: don't really have anything else for this episode. I know
Speaker 1: I got another hour's worth the stuff. We'll then go
Speaker 1: for it. Then get ahead, man, take over. Now, my
Speaker 1: family's gonna be home in a couple of minutes. I
Speaker 1: wanted to talk about let me say, you know, let
Speaker 1: me just wrap up talking about holiday lights. So I
Speaker 1: had mentioned a couple episodes ago or I think everything
Speaker 1: should be fifty dollars, right, Plumber comes over a plunger
Speaker 1: just at fifty bucks, right, like a d eighty what
Speaker 1: fifty bucks? So this year I was like, I'm gonna,
Speaker 1: you know, I wanna put Holliday lights on that because
Speaker 1: we had done Halloween for the first time ever. I
Speaker 1: think I mentioned that I bought inflatables for the house,
Speaker 1: and uh it really I really got a kick out
Speaker 1: of it. I had like a twelve foot grim reaper
Speaker 1: and a twelve foot pumpkin man, and I was like,
Speaker 1: you know, this is this is fun let. We've had
Speaker 1: the house for twenty years, We've never decorated the house.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna I'm gonna look into getting some lights done.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna surprised my family, and uh see what it
Speaker 1: costs to get some lights done. So I contact five
Speaker 1: or six companies in the area that were recommended on Facebook,
Speaker 1: and I say, do you guys supply the lights or
Speaker 1: do I have to buy the lights? And if I
Speaker 1: have to buy the lights, I have no idea what
Speaker 1: to buy. So will you look at the house. Here's
Speaker 1: some pick yours telling what lights to buy and how
Speaker 1: much to install them. All right, So one guy gets
Speaker 1: back to me and says, you gotta buy your own lights.
Speaker 1: Here's links to the lights. The lights are like three
Speaker 1: hundred dollars that that I want for the house, okay,
Speaker 1: and he says we charge. So I'm thinking to myself, Okay,
Speaker 1: to put up some lights over the garage some trees.
Speaker 1: It's an hour. I'll do it. Yeah, yeah, okay, right,
Speaker 1: you will go into pocket. I'll go to two. If
Speaker 1: it's two hours to put up some lights, I'll buy
Speaker 1: the lights. I'll pay somebody. So then he writes me
Speaker 1: back and he says, uh, I s I said, I'll
Speaker 1: get the lights. Uh, here's where I want the lights.
Speaker 1: He writes me back and he says, I it's but
Speaker 1: we charged by the half day. In full day, we
Speaker 1: charge four hours or six hours. That's not cool. So
Speaker 1: I go, that's not by the hour, that's by the
Speaker 1: half day. You don't tell me what you're charged by.
Speaker 1: What is the point of telling me what you charged
Speaker 1: for half for an hour? If you're going to charge
Speaker 1: me for four hours of no matter what, just tell
Speaker 1: me four or six hundred dollars. You go and lay
Speaker 1: the groundwork hour whatever was right. But then you say
Speaker 1: minimum four hours, then it's not nine, it's four hundred.
Speaker 1: So hit the jingle. Scary. That is a scamboni. That's
Speaker 1: what that is. I mean, you tell me it's gonna
Speaker 1: be you know, And then you're lying to me. You're
Speaker 1: lying to people. So now you're telling me it's by
Speaker 1: the way, Yes, of course you did so. Then so
Speaker 1: I said, well, so it's four hundred dollars, and then
Speaker 1: I buy the lights. He goes, well, it could be
Speaker 1: six hundred. I go, dude, it's not taking six hours
Speaker 1: to put up the lights. Not a chance. This is
Speaker 1: probably a union worker. It's probably gonna take three days,
Speaker 1: so he tells me. Because but don't worry, it's only
Speaker 1: three fifty to take them back down. What so now
Speaker 1: it's seven fifty plus the lights. So I said three
Speaker 1: fifty to take them down. First of all, part of
Speaker 1: the price was to put lights on my bushes. I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna pay you to take lights off of my bushes.
Speaker 1: I can reach those. So if you just have to
Speaker 1: get the lights off the roof line over my garage,
Speaker 1: that's twenty minutes. Yeah, but it's a minimum of four
Speaker 1: hours because you're you're not like carefully like hanging up
Speaker 1: each section of the You're like you get pulling them
Speaker 1: going blah blah, you're not making sure that straight, Like
Speaker 1: how long does it take to pull the lights off?
Speaker 1: Don't tweet me, I don't really care. By the way,
Speaker 1: since they charge half price to take them down, they
Speaker 1: probably do not wrap them up properly. They probably just
Speaker 1: don't know if they throw them onto the driveway. Here
Speaker 1: you go, your asshole, get by a ladder next time.
Speaker 1: So I go, you know what, that's got to be
Speaker 1: high that's gotta be high priced. So I I get
Speaker 1: another guy. He's got pictures on his website beautiful homes whatever.
Speaker 1: So I'm like, I need the dinky special. So he says, oh,
Speaker 1: well you need uh you need white lights over your
Speaker 1: thing and you know, over the thing and the bushes.
Speaker 1: He says, all included with the lights. Will will supply
Speaker 1: extension chords and everything. Eleven hundred to put him up,
Speaker 1: five hundred to take him down. I was about to
Speaker 1: tell you, Brodie, that first guy was the bargain, because
Speaker 1: it was the first guy was the bargain. I mean,
Speaker 1: seven hundred fifty dollars. I'm like, no, why it should
Speaker 1: cost two hundred. I should have kissed that guy. I
Speaker 1: got another guy who said eighteen hundred, but we'll we'll
Speaker 1: design it for your home I got. I don't want
Speaker 1: to designed. I just I got a normal house. I
Speaker 1: just want some lights. What are you doing to me?
Speaker 1: I gotta have money for the PS five I just bought.
Speaker 1: I can't finance the lights. And by the way, they're
Speaker 1: all in coots. They all know each other. These guys business,
Speaker 1: please please, So I'm sorry, but fuck you Ted. That
Speaker 1: was his name. Fuck you Ted, I'm not You're not
Speaker 1: getting d dollars too, because you paid for the lights.
Speaker 1: I went to home depot tonight, which is why we
Speaker 1: started a few minutes late. I went to home depot.
Speaker 1: I bought netlights for the bushes I bought. I bought
Speaker 1: white lights for over the garage. Right. The whole thing
Speaker 1: costs me like, uh about nine Right, And you're gonna
Speaker 1: do it yourself and break you throw the nets on
Speaker 1: the bushes. I already have extension cords. I'm gonna hang.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna put the lights around the garage doors of myself.
Speaker 1: And you know what, for a thousand dollars, I'm not spending.
Speaker 1: I'll live without the lights on the roofline by the gutters.
Speaker 1: So you're gonna do it half fast? Yeah, and do
Speaker 1: it yourself? Yeah? For a tenth of the price. Would
Speaker 1: you hired Ted? Four? Our minimum? Can't you can't tell?
Speaker 1: It's like you go to a garage, Uh, like you
Speaker 1: hire electricians sometimes? What do you make an hour? One
Speaker 1: ten an hour? But if I walk in the door,
Speaker 1: it's too our minimum. You gotta be worse, it's gotta
Speaker 1: be worth his while to come out to begin with.
Speaker 1: That's how like if you look at look at taxi
Speaker 1: cabs and a lot of places, it's it's it's always
Speaker 1: the first It's always X amount of money the first mile.
Speaker 1: So then charge me two hundred the first two hours,
Speaker 1: and then a seventy five dollars the third and four.
Speaker 1: This guy was budging even if you were gonna have
Speaker 1: him do it at a time that was scary. It's December,
Speaker 1: he's he doesn't need my business. Yeah, but if you
Speaker 1: do it at a time when it's convenient for him
Speaker 1: that he's not doing anything else, December twenty eight, I
Speaker 1: probably get sitting at home pulling his put in the
Speaker 1: middle of the afternoon. I speaking at decembery. I'm on
Speaker 1: Amazon looking for a couple of for inflatables. I know
Speaker 1: it's late in the season, don't don't hate me for it.
Speaker 1: So I'm looking for inflatables, right I find one I
Speaker 1: like right now. I'm Jewish, so we're not looking for
Speaker 1: like Santa Claus. We're looking for fun inflatables that are winterry. Okay.
Speaker 1: I find one I like. It's and it will arrive
Speaker 1: in two days, but then it says available from other
Speaker 1: sellers for oh a deal, So I clicked up. I
Speaker 1: click on that and it says brand new Amazon Prime
Speaker 1: for the same sixty nine inflatable, and under it it
Speaker 1: says will ship. You should expect a delivery between December
Speaker 1: eight and December. Ah, the Christmas is over right, So
Speaker 1: if I want to buy it for December eighteen, hopefully
Speaker 1: it arrives on the eighteenth, I get a week before
Speaker 1: Christmas of having this inflatable for and I have it
Speaker 1: for next year. So I'm thinking I might make that move,
Speaker 1: and if it shows up, it shows up. But how's
Speaker 1: that like? Let's say you really wanted it for this year,
Speaker 1: You're gonna gamble saving saving the fifty bucks. So what
Speaker 1: I was thinking to do? And hear me out, scarre,
Speaker 1: hear me out, hear me out. Okay, you buy it
Speaker 1: for seventy and you buy it for twenty, right, Okay,
Speaker 1: if it shows up on you return the seventy dollar
Speaker 1: one Amazon. If it doesn't return, if it shows up
Speaker 1: on at that point, I've already inflated the other one.
Speaker 1: Now in the one arrives, I returned that for sixty boo. Yeah, boom,
Speaker 1: there you go, and you still get your money back
Speaker 1: the maximum amount possible. Right. How about that? How about
Speaker 1: that's you pulling a fast one. That's you pulling a
Speaker 1: It's it's me pulling a you know what. It's called
Speaker 1: Stam Brodie. I like that nothing. You know I because
Speaker 1: you know where I'm from. Boys glad, boys rock, rock
Speaker 1: gla